#and its just occured to me that i could actually
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Adding onto Steve's crime spree from this (and this and this)
Eddie has determined that he's not asking the right questions in life.
Is he questioning the man? Yes. Every day.
Is he asking Wayne for help when his van shits the bed on Thursday? No. When his van is still unusable come Saturday, did he ask his friends if he could catch a ride to band practice? No.
Did he ask if he could get a ride home? Also no.
It's raining and Eddie regrets his life choices so hard, he doesn't notice the Porsche 928 until it blows through the crosswalk he was about to step onto. He's hit with a tidal wave of frigid early November street water because, of course, he is.
"Fuck's sake," Eddie swore, pushing his wet hair out of his face. In his perphery, the Porche slams on its breaks and rolls back into the crosswalk beside him, but he barely notices. Talking to the driver, the world, or god, Eddie does not know when he rants, "Thanks! Thanks for that, I really need pnumonia. Thanks for bestowing-"
"Sorry, man," Steve says, an apologetic wince sticking out of the open window of the Porche. "Wanna ride? I can take you where you're going."
Eddie looks at the car, then at Steve, and then back at the car and signs, "...Fine, but only because this car is beautiful and not to expunge your guilt."
"Dude, I don't think a sponge is going to help."
Eddie rolls his eyes but sticks his guitar in the trunk before sliding into the passenger seat. He has to physically stop himself from touching everything. He's never even seen a Porche before, wow.
Steve's in the driver's seat looking like he's dying for Eddie to ask about the car so he can talk about it. Honestly, Eddie wants to ask about the car. He probably should have asked about the car but instead, he shakes the water out of his hair like a dog as payback.
"C'mon, man," Steve complains, wiping the water off his face. "Watch the leather."
Eddie gives him directions and then bites the bullet. He asks the wrong question, "You trade in the Beamer?"
"No way. That's my baby," He says. "I'm just borrowing this lady."
The conversation is actually nice. None of Eddie's friends know anything about cars but Steve seems to know a lot. He can almost forgive the guy for being a jock and the psychological warfare he's bestowed onto Eddie's brain the past week and a half, but then-
“It sounds like - shit," Eddie says, echoing the same sentiment as Steve at the sight of flashing red and blue lights in the rear view. A question he should've been asking all along occurs to him, "Did you steal this car?"
Steve gives him an annoyed look and then rolls down his window, smiling that All-American smile, "Heya, Hop. Didn't think you were working today."
"This car was reported stolen."
Eddie swears, sinking into the leather with the hopes that it eats him. Steve doesn't even hesitate, "Let me guess, Mrs. Woolledge? Crazy she knows what all her neighbors are doing but not that her kid's on dope."
Hopper doesn't say anything and the silence is loud so Steve adds, "It's not stolen. It's my dad's car. I have permission."
"From your dad?" Hopper asks, getting an annoyed nod from Steve. "Same dad that's out of town?"
"Well, Hop. There's this thing called a phone."
"You get that MRI...right? Throw the keys out the window," Hopper says. Eddie's mentally preparing on how he's going to explain this to Wayne when he calls from jail. Steve protests. Hopper demands, "Throw. The keys. Out. The. Window. Now."
Steve seems to realize that he's pushing his luck because he does just that. He even gets out of the car when Hopper tells him to. Hopper tells him to get in his truck and Steve straight up lies, "Hop, I'm taking my friend home. We're working on a school project together. At his house.”
Eddie curses Steve's entire bloodline from start to finish when Hopper lookings directly at him still in the car, "That true?"
Say no. Say you don't know him. Say you know nothing. Say anything but, "Yes."
"What subject?'
"History," Steve says at the same time Eddie says 'Art' and then rolls his eyes, "Art history, yeah?"
Hopper nods like he thinks they're full of shit and then tells them both to get in his truck.
Steve protests but more about leaving the car on the street than anything else while Eddie briefly thinks about the psychic his mom used to know. He wonders if she could curse someone for real. Maybe he can call her from jail.
He's fully ready to see the police station that he fails to realize where Hopper's going until they’re in Forest Hills. He turns and looks at both of them and says, "I'd like to know what grade you get on this project."
"Aye, aye, Captain," Steve says with a salute, pulling Eddie out of the car. Once they're inside, Steve peaks out the blinds like, "Yeah, he'll sit there for a while. He thinks I'm lying. Wanna smoke?"
Eddie is baffled, "No."
"Okay," Steve shrugs and flops down on the couch. He pulls a set of keys out of his pocket and adds, "Spare key. We just gotta wait until he's gone and can circle back for your guitar."
The only thing Eddie can think is, “what the fuck” and he doesn’t even know which part he’s talking about.
#Steve a few seconds later: What’s up with all these cups?#The presence of the spare key does imply that Steve was aware that he’d get caught#Eddie is going to think about this when he can’t sleep later that night ask himself: why the fuck did he let me in that car?#These keep getting longer and longer but they do have a tag now#Let Steve Commit Crime AU#steve harrington#eddie munson#jim hopper#stranger things
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I was recently exposed to the rabbit hole that is Minecraft horror mods and it honestly really disappointed me. So much so that I thought up my own horror mod in response with some key distinctions to make it feel actually scary:
Be as subtle as possible to the point that the player can't tell whether a mod or a weird glitch is causing the effects. Not only is it scarier to take advantage of the existing horror within vanilla but doing this would really mess with veteran players who know the game in-and-out.
Rely on ambient psychological horror. No jumpscares, no threats, no escalation, not even anything flatly disadvantageous. The mod would just weaponize the player's paranoia against themselves.
Be really nefarious as to take full advantage of the insane adjustability that Minecraft has with all its internal options, gamerules and mechanics as well as use the player's acquaintance of the game against them. It should be a horror idea that could only work within Minecraft.
So here's the idea I got from all of this (mind you, I have no idea if a mod like this already exists):
Every in-game day there's a 5% chance (3% if you slept with a bed) for an event to occur from this mod. This chance is fixed and never changes. When an event occurs, its chosen randomly from a very exhaustive list of different events and (depending on what type of event it is) will either occur once or persist until the next event. The likelihood of every event is identical. So this system for pulling them is entirely static and random. Additionally, the chance is rolled again whenever an event occurs. Meaning there's an incredibly low chance for you to experience two or more events in the same day.
So what do these events do? Well, they're designed to mess with the player in the most subtle ways possible. Often specifically targeting their memory, understanding of game mechanics and overall familiarity with Minecraft. The intended effect is to give the player a creeping sense of powerlessness in a sandbox game that they are otherwise completely in control over. Some possible events could be:
Hearing a sound effect in the distance from a source that isn't real.
Having an item currently in a chest/furnace change its amount or position.
Replacing a current painting sprite with another one of the same size.
Having a door/trapdoor be activated (i.e. opened if it was closed and closed if it was opened).
Skipping a full day from sleeping rather than just the night.
Having a specific gamerule temporarily change from its default value until the player triggers it (with minor adjustments to make it less apparent. For example still having the player drop their inventory upon death when keepInventory is toggled on but having the items despawn near instantly unless another player was nearby).
Having a tamed/trusting mob despawn (but only if the player had not interacted with them or been near them for a while).
Surviving otherwise fatal damage or dying from otherwise near-fatal damage.
Randomly changing the difficulty or local difficulty (without it being visible in the options or the debug screen).
Randomly changing slime chunks.
Randomly changing the moon phase.
The list goes on.
These are not notable events but that's the point. The intended effect is to confuse the player and make them doubt themselves without ever thinking that a mod is responsible. To make things even more nefarious, you could have this mod be disguised as a typical QoL mod and sneak it into modpacks to really mess with people.
This is the kind of horror that I think suits Minecraft best. Not the loud, overt, in-your-face kind of horror. But the kind that has you slowly begin to doubt yourself and the world around you. No escalation, no climax, no resolution. Just you left alone to consume yourself out of your own paranoia.
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🎾 🤍💐✨🎀
standford!art who’s your best friend finds out no guy has ever hit your gspot before :(
“are you being serious?”
but it's so fuckin easy! he thinks
your cheeks get warm. you focus on the various hangnails you have instead of making eye contact.
“um...yeah.” you say quietly.
he immediately regrets having such a big reaction and scolds himself.
those rotten frat guys, they only care about one thing.
“hey, hey,” he touches your cheek and crouches a little so he's no longer towering over you. “i didn’t mean to embarrass you, sweetheart. it’s not your fault. they’re just inattentive."
“thanks.” you mutter with no expression in your voice.
he was too curious not to ask,
“have you ever found it by yourself?”
a laugh involuntary escaped.
“i’ve never tried.”
art fake pouts.
“you poor girl,” he coos, putting it on thick.
you scoff, but the heat in your cheeks only gets worse and you cant help but smile. he’s way too good at breaking your walls down, and he knew it
“i can show you, if you like.”
your body becomes unmoving.
"what?"
the most logical explanation you can think of is that he spoke a different language and it was lost in translation. because surely he wasn't offering what you think he was offering.
“what kind of friend would i be if i didn’t?”
he had that stupid smirk on his face.
“wait, you’re serious?? wha-”
he steps closer to you, close enough you can feel his body heat.
“we’ve always been closer than most friends, no?”
you shake your head.
“i mean, yeah, but that’s-“
his body goes stiff, eyebrows furrowed like that's the worst news you could've given him.
now he's the one shaking his head. his mostly blue eyes become fixed on the ground. he looked like a kicked puppy.
“that was a stupid idea. you're right. m'sorry. i don’t know why i brought it up."
he begins to walk off.
are you actually going to reject this offer from your insanely handsome best friend? half the girls at stanford would kill for this opportunity. and here it is, falling into your lap.
“wait!”
he wipes the smile off his face before turning around.
“yeah, uh… i’d like that.”
he breaks into a smile.
"really? i truly didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
there's still a frown gracing his features.
"you didn't! you didn't. i was just caught off guard. that's all."
"...okay" he smirks slightly.
"okay."
another awkward silence presents itself. what should you-
"come over to my dorm at 8 tonight. that is of course unless you want to do it at yours and risk your roommate catching a free peep show."
his sudden confidence caught you off guard. he's giving you whiplash at this point.
"uh, no. no. yours is great."
who the hell can afford a private dorm as a sophomore?
oh right. tennis champions...
before he goes, he kisses you on the cheek. the first of many that would occur that day. his lips are the perfect proportion for his face and they feel like being touched by a pink cloud.
3 hours later
''FUCK, art, please"
"aww, i know baby. no one can treat you like i can."
its relentless. the entire time. the top half of him babys you while the bottom half tries to leave an imprint.
you didn't know your back could arch this much.
"are you gonna cry from how good it is? poor girl."
and you do. saltwater flows down your cheek and he wipes it off and cradles your head, showing you some mercy.
"you can do it, babygirl. you can give me one more, cant you?"
you nod fervently. it wasn't even about orgasming (of which you've done twice) anymore it was about making him happy.
"yes," you pant "ill come for you, artie, shit hnnn."
once you started babbling you couldn't stop. he thought it was adorable, honestly. he's never made a girl dumb on his cock this quickly. you really needed it.
you're gonna be so fun to play with. he thought.
he pecked your cheek while coaxing you through it.
"atta girl, make my cock all creamy for me. you can do it."
you feel every muscle, no. every atom in your body relaxes. and where your bodies met was so warm and slick and art might slip if he's not careful.
"there you go" he whispered into your neck. "so beautiful. such a good girl, im so proud of you. knew you could do it."
you think he is peppering kisses across your face and chest but you cant will your eyes to open yet and every inch of your skin is tingling.
your semiconsciousness works to his advantage because he loves resting inside you. he could fall asleep just like this but you probably wouldn't like that.
he strokes your hair and stares at you while you recover. he wants to let you fall asleep right away but knows that's not wise.
"c'mon, angel," he says softly as he scoops you up. "lets get you cleaned up."
#if you see me getting manipulated by a 6 ft blonde man with heterochromia#do not intervene i am exactly where i want to be.#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson fic#challengers fanfiction#challengers fanfic#art donaldson fanfic#art donaldson imagine#art donaldson x you#art donaldson#art donaldson fanfiction#art donaldson smut
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Was initially going to just tag my thoughts on this but I thought they were too good to not actually share properly.
But, oh my gosh I can’t believe I’m only seeing this post now. I don’t know how this hasn’t been a thought that has occurred to me yet, that’s a really good catch.
Anyways though, I actually started a meta analysis before season 6 came out that I never posted ‘cause I thought it was stupid. And it was about what the symbolism of butterflies and the color purple and how they both connect mean throughout the series.
Through my research for that analysis, I found that those two symbols in general in media connect really heavily to the idea of the psyche, which is really fascinating on its own when you’re thinking about all the different places those symbols are used and how much they mainly represent dark magic, star magic, and essentially anything Aaravos related in the series.
But then you think about Viren specifically connecting to those symbols. How we first saw him use the sunray butterflies to mask his real dark magic affected appearance. How his real form is purple skinned. How his own child is a purple butterfly. And how after going through a whole dream sequence followed by a long catatonic episode and simultaneous journey of self-discovery through both he decides he needs to end his cycle of violence by not killing the thing that he used to use to mask his appearance that indicated whenever he was perpetuating that said cycle. Like, if Sir Sparklepuff is a symbol of anything at the end of the day, he is basically the greatest symbol of Viren’s self-liberation.
But obviously, what this means for the symbolism of those things doesn’t just end there. Sir Sparklepuff came back in season 7 by Aaravos’s surprise. Regardless of whatever his unfinished business was, I think the biggest surprise to Aaravos as speculated by a lot of people besides myself as well was actually the fact that he was able to come back at all.
Like, I convinced myself that my original idea for that analysis was stupid because that symbolism I picked up on wouldn’t run that deep. But Sir Sparklepuff’s own story literally has to do with the idea of having a soul or lack thereof. He is actually, legitimately a symbol of the psyche, not just for Viren but for himself. (You could even say some things about how he could be applied as representation of some parts of Aaravos’s character arc too given that he was his child also and Aaravos had supposedly not planned for him to have a soul.)
Also, the fact that now Claudia is trying to follow in his footsteps, his other child. Now she’s gaining his same corrupted appearance with purple colored skin, is working far more closely to Aaravos, is seeking out power (I’m working on an analysis of her character right now and it talks about that specifically too) like her dad did, and also seems to be gaining some ties to the sun primal which was the primal the butterfly Viren used to kill was tied to.
Oh, right. And also, she was the one who killed Sir Sparklepuff for him after Viren rejected his chance to do that himself as Sir Sparklepuff was his symbol of self-liberation. And then we see Viren during all of season 6 grew less and less in control and is tested on how free he really feels he is. (Yelling at the walls about how he’s free which is then followed by an image of a fly caught in a spiderweb and then eaten by a spider, telling Soren he doesn’t expect to be forgiven or redeemed and he’s accepting any punishment he’ll receive, being forced to use dark magic in his final moments but then making his last choice of sacrificing himself over his child—unlike what he was unable to prevent with Sir Sparklepuff, but also in a way having Sir Sparklepuff’s sacrifice represent more of Viren’s own idea of self-liberation being sacrificed then as his son being sacrificed, etc.) It was by having Claudia kill Sir Sparklepuff that convinced him to leave, that led him down the path to his permeant death. He felt sure of himself despite not knowing exactly how he was alive till he found out the reason he was alive was because Claudia killed Sir Sparklepuff. I mean, had he lived for another reason would he have stayed? If Sir Sparklepuff could have continued to live, would Viren have actually fought for the right to atone for what he has done and not immediately gone searching for whatever punishment he might have received in Katolis and accepted it? We see him starting to question Aaravos, maybe even feeling the urge to do something about Aaravos when he discovers he’s alive. If he had lived by other means, like maybe having Claudia use her own blood or some other alternative, maybe he’d have a completely different arc than what we saw. But it was the death of Sir Sparklepuff and Claudia being the one to cause that death that was the ultimate turning point in his arc. (There’s so much to say about the relevance of the “no parent should have to see their child suffer for them” or whatever he said quote here, but then I’d have to type up another couple of paragraphs just on that and I don’t want to right now.)
Oh, and I’m just now remembering this. The fact that in the Lost Child reflections story as well as several moments throughout the series we see Sir Sparklepuff mimicking her behavior and mannerisms and literally mirroring her. (In the Lost Child’s story she complains about it just being him who’s staying with her now, but as he’s mostly mirroring her during that story he could be representing her and her feeling alone with herself. And rereading it now, of my gosh, there is soooooo many references to the idea of innocence that was expressed more explicitly in season 7. And in the story it seemed to be used to connect Claudia’s and Sir Sparklepuff’s characters together, with his innocence reminding her of her loss of innocence but still prevalent feelings of helplessness and being childish. Makes a lot of sense with her main issues propelling her corruption arc being her own resistance to accept accountability over her own actions despite being offered a lot of autonomy and agency throughout the entire series.)
Like, I don’t know. This is really making me want to look back at that unfinished analysis and rewrite it and share it now. I feel like I have a lot more to say now than I did then.
I’m rewatching and just the way that across the early seasons Viren uses the butterflies after his uses of dark magic, to change his appearance back, and then how Aaravos tells Viren “you’re going to need to look presentable” in season 3 episode 3 and he brings him a butterfly to consume, and then we get the whole season 5 episode 9 “You will sacrifice your other child. Our child” and he presents him with butterfly winged gremlin child Sir Sparklepuff
#I’m sorry if this sounds incredibly incoherent it’s super late where I am and I’m tired#I might have to edit this later#the dragon prince#tdp#sir sparklepuff#lord viren#viren#claudia#aaravos#tdp viren#viren tdp#tdp claudia#claudia tdp#tdp aaravos#aaravos tdp
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The Other Woman - Final Part
A/N: Here’s part three! I know you guys wanted to know what happened to the Guard’s wife so here it is; This will also be the last part I do for this series as I’ve got a ton of other ideas and I’d like to work on those as well. Anyway, enjoy the last part!
------------------
Since you’d left the Palace in the Human populated area, time went by in a whirlwind.
Your wedding with the Lord had happened quickly after leaving and was one of the prettiest events the whole forest – and some humans – had ever seen.
The Fae Lord had been delighted to invite and meet the rest of your family. He and your father seemed to get along swimmingly already, and greeted each other like they were old friends when your families carriage arrived in the forest.
Later that evening, after catching up with your family and entertaining them the whole day, you had asked the Fae Lord something that had been on your mind for the day, “how and when did you meet my father?”
It had evaded you how he had asked your father for your hand, and it hadn’t occurred to you to ask your Fiance until today.
The Fae Lord gave his signature grin as he raised a tea cup to his lips, “I actually met him the night I said I wanted to help you.” He explained, “your father was in a pub and I had snuck out to go and do some late night drinking. He was there and we just hit it off.” The Lord set his cup down on its saucer and frowned. “Although, it wasn’t until the next morning that I actually found out he was your father, and then had to work on my image before I asked him for your hand.”
You snorted, “yeah something tells me he wouldn’t have been happy about a drunken Fae asking for my hand in marriage after you’d been out with him the previous night.”
Soon, your wares and personal items began to arrive from the Palace and amongst them, were all the presents that the King’s Guard had gifted you. They had been thrown into one of your many jewellery boxes, the necklaces tangled together with the many bracelets that the Orc had gifted you.
They felt dirty, wrong to even look at now, felt tarnished and rusted with sin as you ran your thumb over the smooth gold.
Of course, you wouldn’t dream of wearing them, but you also couldn’t stand to just throw them away. Many other people who were less fortunate than you could benefit from the money that these items cost… but the thought of giving the people evidence of adultery filled you with dread, made your stomach churn with anxiety.
You explained your complicated feelings to your fiance one morning at breakfast.
He listened intently, before suggesting, “why don’t you send them to King’s Guards’ wife?”
Your blood turned cold at the thought. “Isn’t that a bit… callous?” You asked. “For her I mean. She’s probably had the baby now, and isn’t in much of a situation to leave him if she wanted… That and then everyone would know what happened between me and her husband.”
“Not necessarily.” Your fiance said, raising a finger. He leaned his elbows on the breakfast table and pointed at you, “it doesn’t have to be done in bad taste. If you send her the jewellery and offer her a position here, with better pay and better accommodation, she may just come here and decide to work for us.”
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#monster lover#monster romance#monster x human#monster x female#monster x reader#monster x you#fae x female!reader#fae x you#fae x reader#fae x human#fae x y/n
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Hi! I do not remember the details but did Harry stop using the Half Blood Prince's book because he found out it was Snape? Or was it somethin' else?
Harry has a lot of complicated feelings about the Half Blood Prince's copy of Advanced Potion Making, which prompts him to hide it in the Room of Requirement... where stays until (I guess) it gets burned up during Book 7. That's a bit sad actually. I hope the Room of Requirement *gave* it to someone, and like - George Weasley or someone is using it.
Harry is absolutely emotionally gutted after casting Sectumsempra at Draco. Like this is just him in shock:
“And you, Potter . . . You wait here for me.” It did not occur to Harry for a second to disobey. He stood up slowly, shaking, and looked down at the wet floor. There were bloodstains floating like crimson flowers across its surface. He could not even find it in himself to tell Moaning Myrtle to be quiet, as she continued to wail.
After he comes back to himself a little, he feels kind of betrayed ("it was as though a beloved pet had turned suddenly savage; what had the Prince been thinking to copy such a spell into his book?") He's also worried about disappointing Slughorn (who thinks that Harry is a potions prodigy like his mother, which is attention Harry does seem to like on some level.) He's worried about getting in trouble, but there's also a part of him that doesn't want the book confiscated... so he just hides it, instead of emotionally processing all of this.
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#idk why im making so many polls today#but i made a joke the other day when i did the lineart for my lucifer piece#of 'babe wake up new colouring page dropped'#and its just occured to me that i could actually#like#yeah#i could just drop some of my clean lineart and let yall go ham#hartradio#artist on tumbrl
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I love fandoms, especially witnessing what fans take away from source material and how fans interpret it based on their experiences. Not to mention the stark difference of interaction between new fans, casual fans, experienced fans, and long-term fans.
I say this because the SVSSS fandom has continuously fascinated me in insisting in discussions that there are parallels between Shen Jiu and Luo Binghe (tell don't show), but in their fanworks, I just see parallels between Luo Binghe and Yue Qingyuan (show don't tell).
And it's not even (fully) a case where they're blending character personalities because they want what the other dynamic has, it's just how the characters are based on canon in two different timelines.
All of this to say, perhaps original draft PIDW (NOT original!PIDW nor pre!SY PIDW which are completely different) was supposed to revolve around the dynamic between SJ and YQY vs SJ and LBH. Perhaps YQY was to be the last hour mastermind, the true foil to LBH.
And fandom is just circling this idea without realising it because, once again, the unreliable narrator that is SY has already convinced this fandom that any version of SJ has to be a/the villain, regardless if it's through his own actions or baseless rumours.
Warning, run-on sentence ahead.
I don't know, mans, but it's gotta mean something that LBH and YQY have such similar life beats of being orphaned and having a tough life but remaining kind/compassionate because they had someone to live for until they didn't which left them empty until they found (or refound in YQY's case) one (1) man to obsess over in an uncomfortably intrusive way with no regards for his feelings and rejections, eventually reaching a position as the most powerful being in existence with a huge caveat that their sword is 83% of that power and is slowly killing them which did nothing to soften said man of their obsession's into showing them kindness leading to the ultimate confrontation between the two in which only one could survive and keep their obsession, not that it mattered because neither of them got to experience his feelings reciprocated, except in another timeline where the same things are happening until their obsession suddenly stops rejecting their (still intrusive) advances even if he is acting a bit silly, but hey take advantage while you can and take advantage they did because now they have that reciprocated feeling (except one still "won" as he gets to keep him for himself) and be thankful that all it took was, in their perspective, a near death fever that drastically changed his personality and most likely left him crippled in some other way, preventing their obsession from not NOT needing them anymore, all-in-all fulfilling their desire to be relied upon again, hooray! 😋😁✌🏽
In all seriousness, at the end of the day people are going to draw connections between characters that fit whatever narrative they understood from the story. SVSSS fandom just seems to be trying to convince others of one narrative while believing on a deeper level of another narrative. It's amusing and makes following the fandom fun.
#the hippo speaks#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#luo binghe#mxtx svsss#svsss#svsss fandom#yue qingyuan#i am never going to get over that the fix it for the pidw!timeline proposed by svsss#was to put its titular character through traumatic brain injury that changed his personality and scrambled his memory#all so these two overly attached men could have their feelings returned#i know that's grossly simplifying it but sometimes you gotta do that#to understand the sheer horror of what actually occurred#sj: I hate men because they've ruined me to get what they want. i will never again give men what they want.#system: well that's not gonna fly buddy so we'll just replace you with someone who will give men what they want#also system: but the kicker is your replacement won't know he's giving them what they want because he doesn't understand your trauma 😁#system cont.: so it'll actually be super romantic and just a hint traumatising here and there for when he doesn't give in#system cont.: but thats ok because he's soft so he'll bre- ahem fall for one of these men soon enough#system: and then all will be saved 🥰 just like the replacement sqh accepting his man's abuse instead of fighting it teehee 😋#telling y'all the system is a reference to ill advised fans who think being stalked is a complimemt and being abused is protective#and being gaslit is just how people talk 🥲#the hippo tags
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I'm reading A Lonely Place of Dying and Alfred latching immediately onto Tim is NASTY work. Tim shows up and is like "I never aimed to be Robin! I mean I did karate my whole life to emulate Robin and just so happen to have sought you out and grabbed this costume in my size out from that case and really you should be calling me Robin just for now and let me come with you as Robin but I never dreamed it would specifically be ME being Robin. You have a lovely house and home btw :) Now go back to being 10." And Dick's understandably like "No I am a grown man now who are you" and Bruce is not here for this one, but later on is like "You aren't Robin, you're some kid dressed up like my dead son." But Alfred?
IMMEDIATELY Alfred is implying Dick was trying to subtly ask Tim to be Robin (simply not true in in NTT 61, when the implication is made, although he changes his mind in Batman 442) and that Bruce should be grateful for this young man's profound bravery and immense natural skill and maybe show him a few pointers or something idk we'll see :) Like let's be clear, the idea that Tim didn't want to be Robin is simply not part of this story outside of like two lines of dialogue where he's like "oh I didn't consider it could be me!" after which he immediately goes "Wow so you ARE gonna let me be Robin right?" the second he sees the opportunity. The guy essentially makes himself Robin once Dick makes it clear he isn't gonna be. Dick tells Tim nobody should be at first (until he changes his mind) but is ignored because Tim doesn't get why and goes with what he understands, his own stance.
I'm of the opinion that the whole "Tim understands that being Robin is an arduous task full of suffering from the start and chooses to bravely yet sadly martyr himself for the cause" thing I see sometimes is strongly disproven, at least in the beginning of his Robin career, by his "Batman NEEDS a Robin (to love and care for and to watch out for him in return :) )" line of reasoning, his subsequent willingness for Anybody to be Robin whether or not it was him (unless he was consciously okay with other children suffering for his benefit which I find really hard to believe,) and his active glee at anything involving being Robin and persistent smiling pursuit of Doing So against Batman's strong disapproval, because he hasn't officially said no (he did several times, but you can't blame a kid for being excited.) Like, I think he said he never dreamed of being Robin just because having a kid come in begging to replace Batman's dead son because it was a personal aspiration would be extraordinarily rude and arrogant and they wanted people to like this one. He was NOT in any way adverse they just couldn't make him THAT presumptuous, and he is by nature of what he's doing already moderately so.
But say it was true, that Tim was actively opposed to being Robin? Alfred would be pushing this shit HARD onto this thirteen year old kid like what the fuck bro. And "From what Master Richard said, he follows your orders." is HEINOUS but let's not get into that.
#of all the robins so far Bruce has foisted Robin on Tim is by far the least Foisted#“Even if he's right I dont want another Robin” vs “He doesn't want me but he hasn't told me no yet :)”#“You can't kill batman or nightwing!” “Or Robin?? :D”#bro is literally “And Bumblebee!”#tim says he never wanted it for himself but he actively seeks out being Robin so I think that's like “oh i never imagined”#^I've finished reading through and other dialogue directly confirms this#“yeah it hasn't occurred to be that I could ever be Robin but yk just in case-ies I've been actively preparing to be Robin half my life”#I considered the “being robin is a burden” angle to that line but if that IS what he's saying#it would be pretty fucked up that he'd be okay with anyone being Robin him or not. Like he doesn't come into this AIMING to be Robin#because he's never thought about it#and he clearly has no sense of why Dick is saying no so I can't fully buy into that#I guess the best answer rlly is him being like “oh little old me being robin? :o well gosh golly im doing that now”#i mean the actual best answer is “whoops fuck actually people want Robin back in the story egg on our face with that one”#but yk. in universe#“if they think they can kill Robin with no repercussions who will they hunt down next!”#I mean. They can do that. It becomes a major issue that they can in fact do that with no repercussions. They would be right because its tru#In his first story Tim is ALREADY hyping up the cops as an impregnable force. This is subtle Chuck Dixon foreshadowing#tim drake#batman#dc comics#alfred pennyworth
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Sparkstember Day 24: FFS (Things I Won't Get)
I have something terrible to confess, which is that at first I was not much of an FFS fan, at all. I actually actively DISLIKED most of what I've know from them at that point, which was what the Spotify algorithm seemed very content to throw at me whenever possible until it eventually forgot about it. Well, nothing wrong with that I guess, but I also want to think that most of my initial aversion to this project came from how I was still pretty, uh, close-minded in a sense when it comes to music at the time (and I'm saying all this as though FFS is even THAT much of a departure from Sparks, which it's really not? But maybe I just I saw it differently back then, which I guess is also fair).
But yeah anyway, I had a huge change of heart a couple months later, decided that all these songs are incredibly cool actually and I'm a huge fan now. This is a very solid collaboration and album and I'm so glad this happened. Like, it really is among my very favourite things from Sparks that I barely ever think about in such terms for some reason. Because I've noticed that I treat FFS more like a compliation than an album maybe? Cause yeah I'm pretty sure this is the only album where I have 30-40+ plays on several songs and only around 5 or so on a couple others. And I'm not super attached to the order of the tracklist either, and I'm mostly saying this because I've been a 100% albums over playlists type of person for the longest time. I will listen to the whole album start to end even if I don't like everything on it. It's like, well, if I like the whole thing enough to revisit it, then too bad, I'm sitting through it all until I can enjoy everything on it to at least some extent.
Overall, to me this album embodies that mid-2010s electro pop / indie rock energy that I love very deeply, in the sense that it feels appropriate to think, had I known about it back in the day, I feel like I would have LOVED it and it would have been my personal soundtrack of those early middle-school years of my life (or even earlier, I have this one note of me saying that "FFS is so primary school-core it hurts", so. While it didn't exist in the world yet at that time it still FEELS like that time, and I absolutely love it when music reminds me of a period in my life from around its release even if I was absolutely not aware of it yet at that point. It's like this source of free nostalgia that you didn't know would be attainable from this particular place.)
Also I will just say that it's ENTIRELY because of FFS that I eventually decided to give FF a go as well, and now I'd consider them one of my favourite bands, so, well, heck yeah to that!!
Favourite songs (and other highlights):
Johnny Delusional: oh yeah, I think it's important to note that it was especially THIS song that I found annoying as heck in the beginning. I thought it got very schematic and predictable at points (the long pause after the bridge especially I found to be so.... ahhhh come on, I could see this coming from a mile away!!) All of, which... well, maybe that was still a valid point in a way, but who cares since I love this song now, absolutely and completely and it's just soooo replayable. Every day is a good day to listen to Johnny Delusional a dozen of times
Call Girl: huge huge fan of the intro on this one and that whole wobbly synth sound it has
Dictator's Son: I really like that little guitar riff moment during the bridge
Police Encounters: notably the only FFS song among those early ones for me that I really liked from the start. And it's the ultimate jam, it's incredible how instantly happy and energized this song always makes me feel even after so many listens
Save Me From Myself
So Desu Ne: maybe the biggest offender (positively) when it comes to that "primary school-core" sound. Those cutesy synths are so important to me personally
The Man Without A Tan: realized quite regrettably late how much of a banger this is
Things I Won't Get: you know how it is with me and Russell's falsetto
So Many Bridges
#hell yeah ffs time!!!!!!!! so so awesome i love this album sm. so many of my most replayed songs are from it#for real so weird to think about how i was so ffs-averse at first. what was my problem honestly#i envy people who have been enjoying this album since its release. this could have been me in a better timeline#meanwhile i was too busy fixating on what was charting on top radio hits lists and such. not my best period#but maybe it was necessary and without it many later developments wouldn't occur. who knows#but also ok time to be vain now because i'm soooo happy with this drawing and the next one#(and the one after that too)#they're the best ones i've made so far for sure and i actually tried to put those two right next to the first two i made for this month#and the difference is actually so huge. i never thought i'd be able to get to this point and in just about a month too#i never thought i'd be able to finish so many drawings in such a short time either#so yay for progress. this is huge. to me at least#sparkstember 2024#my art#goose monologues
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#i graduated w my masters in library science last week!#and its so awesome and im so happy and everything#but it just occurred to me the odds that i represent too#out of all my friends from freshman year im one of a handful that graduated undergrad#one of two that have actually started grad school#and the only one who stuck it through#i know some of my friends would like to go back to school some day and more power to them i hope they can and do!!#but woah im the First to have two degrees of my school peers#also makes me feel good because neither of my parents finished a graduate degree (tho they could have if theyd prioritized it)#idk its nice to feel like im actually the best or the first to hit the finish line#because ive never been the best or the top ever#just very very good. if that makes sense. forgettably good#idk its a bad mindset to be in i know but the self confidence boost of having Two Degrees At Twenty Five is amazing
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wondering why im so fucking sleepy for no reason then remembered I forgot to take my meds for 3 days
#how did i live in this world unmedicated like#i have always been this sleepy and tired all the time i just thought it was a personal flaw#taking adhd meds actually made me so#idk when i first had it i coulsnt stop telling my friends how awesome it was to be awake#its like theres no longer a heavy cloud over my consciousness 80% of the time#i could actually read books without dozing off it was amazing ..#so why did i forget...idk i just forgot. i have the forgot disorder#tbh a few months ago id know if i forgot my meds bc I'd just suddenly get sleepy in the middle of the day#these few days i just attributed it to academic stress and lack of sleep and what not but it only just occured to me like#uh#5 min ago#that this is how i feel without medication#cool. cool. i forgot about my brain condition and accidentally slept my whole morning away instead of writing my reports#its actually crazy to me that i need external influences to function normally like i need my awake pills#caffeiene doesnt even do shit for me#i need my stupid fucking cocaine#sorry im just angry at myself again for 1)wasting away hours being sleepu#2)forgot my meds made me remember my debuff. a reminder that i cant ever be normal#adhd is fun except when its not fun then. it fucking sucks#its only good for yapping
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uuuuuhhh no reason just wanna see the robot get preggers because nobody is really taking advantage of the narrative consequences of the robots of ULTRAKILL having fleshy bits inside them (in my humble opinion hahahaha...hahaha....hah....). Anywhosen also a sucker for general Bad End especially when it involves a psycho-sexual (breeding) binding to a greater entity but also I wanna see the murder-robot get knocked up. And the galaxy brain bit of this is instead of calming down they just get Worse.
YEAH NO ONE REALLY TAKES ADVANTAGE OF THAT. and well i mostly assumed a very small percentage of people actually want to breed the robots like that which is why.
also i don't think this as a bad end, but a bad path that can lead to some other.. inch resting things (my stupid ass is trying to craft a plot with horror and drama from this path and how it'd change the story slightly despite knowing I will never get around to writing it in fic form except tiny excerpt ideas and art)
also i have so much to say abt the 'it doesn't calm down it just gets worse' bc its So true
#kicking my legs. it sooo genuinely gets worse i think it believes its actually in “love” with hell. and maybe it is.#gets worse and loses itself more and more. abandon any last trace of identity that had never been regarded anyway by anyone#its easy to let something guide you and instruct you in nearly everything if it feels too painfully good? and why spend more power thinking#altho for the. plot i was conducting in my head it was msotly involving gabriel and the primes bc of an idea my friend gave me which was#that if this occurred before v1 reached the prime sanctums it could have been guided or instructed to go to the sanctums but at the time#it does its currently carrying a child and because of that both the primes and v1 itself are spared because. i dont know if i think#the kings would fight a pregnant person . i at least think sisyphus Wouldnt because wheres the fun in an opponent who appears to already#be disadvantaged. (even if it can fare just fine.)#if any friendships were able to be made (cough . i like sisyphus qnd v1 platonic and romantic) itd be kind of. sad from an outside perspect#ve to watch it deteriorate into being less of its own entity and becoming slowly just another extension of hell. even in fighting it shows.#i wish i could explain it all better#and sorry if this ask is late to be answered i was writing my rwsponse at a con LMAOOO#.txt#ask#i want to write i have no timeee no energyyy but hear me out there is potential for crazy wackjob shit#ive decided also not to kill gabriel i think i should do somethign fucked up with him and his inexperience in relationshios#i forgot who suggested he should get so desperate that he begs for hell to take him as well. (which i cant decide if it would or wouldnt bc#its kind of really funny and mean if it#says no)
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FUCKED UP: i can muddle my way thru reading 80% of hiragana by memory now
#it never occurred to me in like 15 20 years that i could just kjsf actually sit down and start learning japanese. idk#its neat!!!!!!!
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#hm. im in limbo. but at least i can draw again at last. ive never spent so long not wanting to draw. it was terrible#my job search lasted 4 days before i secured a position at target but i dont start until the 26th so im drifting until then#it feels so weird. like i dunno. i keep thinking abt jobs in a weird way now bc i just sorta drifted into what i do#weird academic stuff but i think most jobs arent like being a grad student and that never really occured to me#i dunno why. i could have done so many things but here i am. an ecologist mostly. i dunno. well see what the summer brings#maybe ill grow some social skills. its sorta weird but like the medication has made my head less terrible with intrusive thoughts. like i#can actually drive my car without hyperventilating which is fucking wild. so Maybe ill grow some confidence abt interacting with the world#going back in the fall still seems impossible rn but so does starting a job somewhere else. but i dunno#not where i expected to be in my life. im just lucky i dont have to worry much abt money#especially bc i got an ultrasound done so they cold make sure something wasnt wrong with my uterus#and its fine. guess it just hates me but that means i spent like 350 dollars for a 10min scan that showed nothing#ay. the us medical system#anyway. i guess ill continue drifting until the 26th#probably i should find something to do. or work on my old unpublished data#unrelated
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klay 0 points but he looked sexygorgeous doing it + lockdown defense + mavs WIN and dubs clinch so im leaving here with something 🙂↕️🙂↕️
#nba#klay thompson#dallas mavericks#mavs lb#love when he makes shots but ive shrimply accepted that it is now a somewhat rare occurence which is understandable tbh given age/injuries#they could never make me hate u king#not even if u go 0/100 i srsly dgaf ur face card + beautiful soul more than make up for it i promise#freddie mercury voice#I look ... and i fiind ... I still love youuu#that said I really think people are not giving him enough grace or credit for all the positive ways he impacts the game#like he has set such an impossibly high standard for himself by literally becoming thee singular second greatest shooter OAT so#imo its pretty unreasonable for fans to demand him to put up prime klay numbers nightly when this team doesn't even need him to do that#to be able to win which is actually a good thing !!! not to be a +/- watcher but him just being on the floor opens up so much space for#everyone else because defenders will swarm him no matter what and he knows this because he is very smart !!!#I just have so much love in my heart for him and it physically hurts me to see anyone speak negatively about him after everything#that he's overcome and how critical he is of himself :( I just want him to feel loved :((#guys this is so stupid i don't even KNOW him and he still occupies a fairly large portion of my brain and heart 24/7 it's so badddd#steph and klay were my whole entire childhood and then i forgot about them for the year they were injured and then I remembered them again#after which they found their way back to each other and won the whole fucking thing !!! that's the shit of romcoms bitch !!!#and even if they really won't ever share a backcourt again (which pains me to even type out ew) I'll still love both of them#unconditionally i fear#and also forever#how can you not be romantic about basketball baby!!!#steph/klay#if you read all of this first of all im so sorry and thank you too lol :)#nik's rants
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