#and it's like. even more lonely bc can i even tell them. i dont think it would be ok for me to say it

[nyxi-pixie]

I DONT WANNA BE THE OWNER OF YOUR FANTASY!!! I JUST WANNA BE A PART OF YOUR FAMILY!!!!!

[bunnihearted]

.

[be-good-to-bugs]

when i feel very lonely i get fizzled out of doing anything after less than an hour

[iloveboysinred]

just read ur keith nsfw hc😩😩I ILOVED THEM SO MUCH N UR WRITING IS AMAZINNNGGG,, i was wondering if u could write some more keith nsfw, whatever comes to your mind💗💗

First of all sorry anon bub i had to touch grass and breathe outside air before i wrote this bc i havent written for Keith in a miiinute (sorry voltron feens, i been starving yall right along with the Zuko Stans 💔) but lets get right into it cause i woke up wanting to get active!

Afab! Reader here.

- so since you read my other hcs you already know i think Keith is a FREAK. And let me elaborate!

- dont let his emo lone wolf persona throw you off, cause once he gets through that beginning shy faze hes on your boddyyyyy

- backshot warrior. He likes to be at your ear at all times with his nasty, dirty mouth.

- so while he’s giving you backshots he’ll lean down, whispering nasty praise into your ear, or if its angry sex he’s teasing you about your moans and laying claim to you by leaving marks on you where he can reach you.

- “you’re gasping, your hands gripping the pillows to try and stabilize yourself from the rough back and fourth of Keith’s thrusts and his hands on your hips pulling you back onto his dick. You feel him lean down on you, his chest pressing up against your back. “So tight” he whispers, rotating his hips in tight, agonizingly deep circles. “This pussy’s so good. You’re so good f’me baby” he grunts, bringing himself down to nip and lick at your earlobe, his tongue hot against your skin.”

- he really likes to fuck in front of a mirror, especially if he’s feeling some type of way and wants you to watch as he fucks you open or he wants you to see your face when you cum all over his dick. Bonus points if he’s angry or jealous.

- “eyes on the mirror.” You could tell Keith’s patience was wearing thin, his voice curt as he grabs your chin, turning you back to look at the full body mirror in his room. He started up his pace again with mean thrusts rocking the headboard and filling the room with loud squelches as your poor pussy quivered and drooled around his girth. He had a tight grip on your hair, holding your head up and in place to watch as he fucked you within an inch of your life. “I’m the only one that can fuck you like this.” And he sounds so self assured, your tight walls clenching around him at his words and proving his words true. “Fuckin pussy was made just for me.”

- and dont get me wrong! Keith is a sap too. I genuinely feel like most of the time he’s the sentimental sex type. Like i’ll speak on Keith being a freak ass all day but i genuinely believe most of the time you both have soft, loving sex until yall get booted to space and all the crazy shit starts happening and he just has to take that stress out in other ways besides training.

-Like when you came to him about how you miss home and how you miss just being with him before this whole galaxy space war crazyness began, he comforted you, reassuring you that the two of you being together was as close to home as ya’ll could get. That night, he held your hands in his, fingers interlaced as he made love to you. He held your gaze in his, whispering sweet words and little nothings to you while he rocked his hips into you, slow and deep.

- quickie obsessed. Like i said in the hcs when he wants you he’ll have you. He’s lucky you’re just as down as him because the way this man will just drag you into whatever mildly secluded area and just either swallow your tongue and feel you up or straight up just try and bend you over is crazy. It only takes a misplaced touch or a sultry look and he smirking at you, nothing but ill intent in his eyes as he drags you away. And its even crazier that he has the audacity to act embarrassed if you ever get caught

- I feel like he genuinely likes when you’re a little rough back. Grab his hair, choke him, bruise him up a little and he’s loving it. Has literal hearts in his eyes when you take control and treat him so meanly. When you did it he was shocked the first time, but he definitely finds himself liking it, taking your dominance as a challenge to see who can crumble first.

-loves loves lovessss when you moan his name when he’s fucking you stupid. Its cute how you cant get a coherent word out, everything you say fading into mumbles and gasps.

- pussy EATER. He’s not a pro by any means but once you show him how you like it he does it just to see you squirm and rock into his face. He gets pussy drunk easily, and his eyes bore into yours every time as if he’s holding you down with his gaze.

Thats all i got anon bub. Thank you for your ask💟 AND THANK YOU FOR ENJOYING MY WORK I LOVE YOU

[cringefail-clown]

Jakehal is very fun. But why dirkkri? I dont understand what's appealing about it :? confused

theres a lot of things i like about dirkri and honestly i dont even know where to start lmfao

first of all, and its mostly a funny reason - davekat on crack. like some traces of davekat are still there - the arguing about shit, stoic facade vs emotional mess, all the good stuff, but its also so much more exaggerated it makes it this much more ridiculous. gets even better when you consider them under the lense of swap aus like alphaswitch or tbau, where they land on the meteor together. theyre most likely hunting each other for sports by the year two

second of all, the funney. theyd be so fucking funny together. their smallest arguments would take like twenty pages of non-stop flow of red-orange text to resolve, and not because they came to a consensus but because some third party physically dragged them away from their electronics. it doesnt do any good, since it only gives them both time to think over new arguments to use, and theyre back at it as soon as they get their phones back. like if we had a tournament about which ship would do the most collateral damage to the overall group, i think these two would be Up There. karkat would gauge his eyes out from frustration, because now not only does he have to deal with his piece of shit, know-it-all other self, but now theres also Fucking Dirk thrown into the mix. their home life is absolute insanity, a small jab about the other forgetting to buy sugar once again devolves into a screaming match about the merits and flaws of communism or some other inane shit. and theyre doing it for fun, they enjoy debating with each other, because often times they have vastly different opinions, and comparing their beliefs challenges them intelectually and morally. from the outside perspective theyre one of the most dysfunctional pair in the paradox space, when in fact thats simply how they want their relationship to be, and it makes them better people overall.

third reason is that theyre thematically delicious. dirk is a control freak, micromanaging his and his friends constantly. hes terrified of losing control, but hes also desperate for someone to just tell him what the fuck he should do. dirk doesnt think he should be in control of others, because he believes hes a naturally evil person capable of horrible acts, at the same time he doesnt trust anyone else to get things done but himself. hes a whole collection of contradictions.

kankri desperately needs to be in control as well. hes constantly injecting himself into conversations he has no business being in, trying to find someone thatd listen to what he has to say. hes wants to guide others, but his efforts are flawed, because he doesnt listen to other perspectives - hes got tunnel vision, as he thinks hes the one in the right while everyone else is wrong or ignorant (cringefail seer literally). he doesnt trust anyone else to make decisions for him, and becomes defensive when he thinks others are attempting to coddle him. his ass was definitely culled on beforus.

theyre also both so fucking lonely. dirk conciously tries to put difference between himself and his friends, worrying hell "corrupt" them. kankri tries to connect to his friends, but his behavior alienates him from them to the point of no one except maybe porrim want to have anything to do with him.

my point is, kankri wants to guide people but has to learn to listen to others and reflect on his own flawed opinions. dirk has to learn to trust that people closest to him can get shit done on their own and loosen up, as well as realise hes not evil at the core. them helping each other out - dirk teaching kankri about different perspectives, kankri teaching dirk about letting others do their thing - is something i think about a lot.

also i like to think theyd spar for fun a lot as well. its not really a reason and wholly my own personal headcanon but i wanna mention it as well bc its so funny to me. i like the idea of kankris behaviour being a complete reverse of karkat - where karkat is all bark no bite and doesnt like fighting or violence, kankri puts up a front of the beacon of love and peace and tolerance, but in his free time he gets his rifle and goes shooting at the fucking squirrels or some shit. i think he wouldnt have the same qualms about strifing as karkat. like dirk would try to jokingly jab his finger at kankris side and he would just fucking flip him over his shoulder and onto the table breaking it in half, because he doesnt like being touched unexpectedly and by gods dirk when will you fucking learn. he goes from 0 to 100 real fast. its such a hysterical concept for me.

[moldy-flowers]

UCHIHA CLAN HEADCANON THAT THEY'RE ALL SECRETLY YAPPERS.

Okay hear me out hear me out hear me out. Sasuke, is not a yapper, bc he's internalised all his yapping‼️ He doesn't know the Uchiha ways of the yap!!

Okay so like, when the children are like children, they're the ultimate yappers. But not near people they don't know. Imagine like Itachi coming home and Sasuke sprinting to the door yelling "Ni-San" repeatedly while jumping up and down. You can see it, cant you? BECAUSE HES A YAPPER!!

AND WHEN THEY AND WHEN THEY GROW UP THEY LIKE PICK A PERSON TO YAP OFF TOO AND LIKE THATS THAT PERSON FOR LIFE ITS LIKE SOULMATES SORT OF⁉️⁉️⁉️

Itachi was never a yapper and that's why Fugaku was like "Dont turn out like Itachi..." to Sasuke bc Itachi never conformed to the true Uchiha way!! They knew there was something wrong w him day one!!!

You know that scene where Sasuke to Mikoto is like "Does father care more about Itachi than me?? :(" and Mikoto tells him that actually Fugaku talks about Sasuke all the time behind closed doors? WELL IT MAKES SENSE NOW BC BC WHEN THE UCHIHA GROW UP THEY ONLY YAP TO THE PERSON THEY ARE CLOSEST TO I.E. MIKOTO‼️‼️ FUGAKU YAPS ALL THE TIME TO MIKOTO AND MIKOTO TO HIM‼️‼️

This also works for Shisui bc if we assume Shisuis parents died when he was young, Shisui never had anyone to raise him properly apart from the clan, and he wasn't really apart of their family's. Not to mention he was really highly praised and his goofy silly guy personality was brushed off bc Holy crap where the fuck did he go IS HE BEHIND ME WTF HOW??? HES LIKE 8!!???? WHAT THE SHIT‼️‼️‼️⁉️⁉️⁉️ So Shisui is at the age where he'd stop being a yapper but he's too far gone he's just a goof now and we love him for that.

Also, if we look at our beloved boy Izuna!! He's kind of a goober but he doesn't get the chance to goob around with everyone cause they're in war :(( He's a prankster bc he wants to lift up everyones spirits but when he's not w/ his family hes a snarky bitch (We love him for that!! We all cheer in unison)

Madara, we all saw his friendship with Hashirama, that boy was a yapper‼️ But the one he chose to yap to was Hashirama so most of the time he listens to Izuna yapping and stays quiet bc hashi is the enemy :((

Now our little freaky boy Obito!! He had no proper teacher of the Uchiha ways (pffft he doesn't even know the ways of the Uchiha yap? He's a lost cause just ignore him :// ) and he's lonely to he just yaps and yaps and yaps to anybody with an ear. But then he met Madara and was deyapped. He talks to himself though so just think that counts as a little yap.

Now onto the star of the show the silly little loser Sasuke :33 (Our boy!! our boy!! We all scream clap and cry) When everyone died he was too sad and scared and paranoid and traumatized to yap if anybody would have actually listened. And hc that he desperately clings into anything Uchiha bc he wants to be as close to his family as possible. And everybody he knew was stone cold, or calm and collected and kind to those they were close to. So he too would be stone cold and calm and collected!!! It wasn't too difficult to close himself off because he didn't have any friends in the first place. But did you notice how that when he shows Fugaku his grades and they're all straight A+'s, and in the show we learn they are also graded on their ability to work with others, and in Naruto: the last we see Naruto Sasuke and Sakura sitting at the same table!? Using our heads and our amazing smarts we, together as a team can deduce this means that Sasuke actually worked with a group and worked so well with them that it was deemed an A+ (DESPITE THE FACT HE WAS REALLY ANTI-SOCIAL!? I COULD NEVER) So this means that at a table Sasuke worked with his future team very well despite the fact their personalitys clashed so much, Sakura a nervous wreck which is something Sasuke outwardly hates, and Naruto, a prankster who totally has ADHD and will not focus on anything, and Sasuke at the time was pretty compassionate despite being a little bratty!! They worked together!! (this could also be when Sakura developed a crush on Sasuke!! And Naruto on Sakura!!! Do you see!?? My Uchiha yapping agenda is so canon!!!) I went on a little bit of a rant there BUT we also see at the beginning of the manga that Sasuke actually scored pretty low on his ability to work with others!! He was trying to be more like his dead clan by being stoic and closed off!! He doesnt know they were secretly sensitive losers!! (Whenever they're alone with their partner they're immediately clingy and become the most touch starved people in existence and cling to eachother like if they let go they'll suffocate and die)

Omg fic where for an amount of time Naruto Sasuke and Sakura have a group project that extends before and after the massacre and during it we see Sasuke go from Reluctantly a ball of Sunshine and energy to really depressed and jittery to cold hearted and stoic!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE SOMEOME WRITE IT FOR ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

And so like, it's in the Uchiha genes to yap!! But Sasukes yaps have been internalised and his first like really long time in Konoha he has to relearn how to have conversations with people bc he just yaps in his head and forgets to respond. Everyone thinks Sasuke is soooo intimidating bc he just stands there and glares (He doesn't realise he's glaring) at you and makes you feel really really stupid but he's actually just wondering if he can adopt a fluffy pink cat bc he saw Sakura earlier and wants to know if cats can be pink too. Now he's wondering if he breeds the cats correctly if he could get a rainbow cat. Oh what did you say? SHIT uhmm just roll eyes and walk away roll eyes and walk away. Kiba has a theory that Sasuke is plotting something (He's plotting gay coloured cats) Unfortunately he's so quiet mysterious guy coded that he never truly learns to let out his inner yaps. But when he's home alone or w/ a partner he's comfortable with (Whoever you ship him with) He happily listens or when it's quiet he hums long forgotten lullabys that his mother used to sing. Although im not letting go of my touch starved clingy Sasuke agenda he hums while hugging with a vice grip. And also when Sarada was little he would sing songs to her go help her sleep (Sasuke singing somewhere over the rainbow anyone?? :33)

HAVE YOU BEEN CONVINCED BY MY YAPPER UCHIHA AGENDA!?!?!?!?!?!? HAVE YOU BEEN INFECTED BY THE YAPPER VIRUS YET!????

[66sharkteeth]

I just wanted to say that even though I'm a mostly silent reader, never really commenting on episodes and rarely interacting on the discord, CoB is by far my absolute favorite comic I've probably ever read. I dont doubt for a second that there are many more out there like me, silently gushing over every new episode and excitedly theorizing with their friends.

Even when CoB reaches its end, I will 100% be sticking around for anything else you make.

thank you. im ngl, there's a big irrationality in me that feels like im only writing this comic for like 15 people sometimes. ik that's completely untrue, but it can really feel like that, especially when i step outside the bubble of webtoon and try to share or talk about the comic anywhere else. i've full on just...stopped posting on instagram, because it's just so defeating and exhausting every time i post. I know there's more than 15 people reading my work, but boy its harder to tell myself that every time I post outside of webtoon. i only continue to post here because i've put no effort into growing this so i don't feel as disappointed when only 20 of my 700k followers on webtoon see it.

ik this completely dismisses my silent followers, which i know there are a lot of, and i'm trying really hard to account for them. but man, it's really hard. and i dont think how lonely the process is helps either. i remember numbers never used to bug me as much when i had a close friend to gush about OCs and ideas with, but now that i just gotta kind of do it all myself and be my own cheerleader with nobody to gush about upcoming stuff to, its doubly defeating when it finally posts and nobody's that excited. i don't know how i can feel so alone when there's a good amount of people who follow me, but the whole thing is an incredibly isolating process and it's just gotten so much worse with declining readership and algorithms doing everything they can to make sure nobody sees my work.

sorry if i veered off a bit, but it's been on my mind lately haha. i appreciate every reader so much, silent and vocal. like no seriously, you guys are literally the only thing keeping me going bc i know we're supposed to "create for ourselves" and stuff, but i think most people at least have a friend or partner that they're gushing about their OCs and stuff with, but i just have you guys lol. so thank you for reading, enjoying, and giving me someone to actually share my creations with.

[t-mblr-begone]

HI I JUST FINISHED TNG AND AM AUTISTIC I NEED TO TALK (warning long ass post, ramblings)

Q in his stupid fucking judge outfit???? Oh my god i love him so much?? And like?? I dont even think he wanted to put picard on trial at the end he says it was the continuums orders so did he even want to do that too him? Who knows!! We do know hes gay as shit though oh my god. I love him.

The past, the Encounter At Farpoint, picard yelling for Q on the bridge and everyone probably thinking hes insane. Picard not telling any of them whats going on, even though it doesnt affect the other timelines. Tasha Yar???? Hi Tasha!!!!!! Worf with his old sash, the old uniforms, the shitty dress deanna wore in the first episode (it slayed), data being. So autistic. Liek actually hold on can i talk about tha

This episode, with all its converging timelines, really shows how data grows- not just as a character just in general, as the years go by on the ship, he starts understanding idioms, somewhat. He. He gets more human. He really does. His movements more fluid, hes smarter. He really does grow, something about his neural net constantly evolving or something. Oh my god.

The shitty future?? Worf liking Deanna Romantically Cannon??? Riker was still holding on to the relationship this whole time?? (I never noticed really. Im. Autistic.) PICARD AND CRUSHER GOT MARRIED. And then divorced BUT STILL. Picard back on earth?? Tending to what i can only assume to be grape plants or something, like his brother. Data teaches at Cambridge. He has grey hair, thinks it makes him more distinguished. Geordi has eyes! Like in two different timelines he has eyes.

Thats another thing actually, like i could have sworn at least in the earlier seasons, he didnt want. Eyes? I thought?? But like. It seems like a minor Thing, cause it showed up in that one Riker Gets Kidnapped By A Child Alien Because Its Lonely episode. And again here, and probably other places i can't remember because ive consumed all of tng in 2 months.

The present. I dont have shit to say about that actually. It sure is season 7.

OH MY GOD THE BEGINNING OF THW EPISODE BEFORE Q REAVEALS HIMSELF?? How we dont know if he Is travelling through time or if hes Going Senile. The cuts?? I mean the cuts through the whole episode is so good the cinematography in general!!!! Oh my god. The close ups, the panning, THE ACTING?? TASHA YAR??? EARLY WORF? OLD WORF? I like worf. GEORDI? DATA???? love brett spiner.

And i mean who remembers the judge scene from the first episode at this point? The foreshadowing with the jury(?)/audience(?) i didnt even. Realize until they put Picard on the stand again.

DEANNA BEING FUCKING DEAD IN THE FUTURE HELLO?????????????

Oh my god but the end scene. The end shot of the poker game? Imagine seeing the future, all your friends, drifted apart, tense at each other with worf and riker. Seeing that. And then coming back to reality, to Your Time. And seeing your friends as they are right then. Why didnt picard join them for poker?

No like actually. Did. Did he have a reason for that? Some like, weird captain thing? Or like. Some weird barrier wall thing? Thing where he feels like he should isolate himself.

But the point is, he joins his friends for some poker, i dont think he had probably played poker in years. Its just. Amazing.

You know. I think this is one of the first times ive seen her again and not cried, which is progress because every other time it was. Not great.

But now that tngs over

Hey does tumblr have a word limit? We're about to find out.

But now that tngs over, theres still a lot i have to ask. Like why the fuck did they do that to wesley? Do we see wesley again? Is still dont know who b-4 is. Whats Ro doing now? Is she good? Do we see her again? Does she know kira? Do ro and kira meet? Probably not actually. Itd probably be cool though. Do worf and deanna get married? Please. I ne- oh wait no they cant bc worf has a thing with jadzia at some point. What the fuck is up with worf and jadzia? And also where is alexander now? When does worf join ds9? Probably season 3 idk. Or Barclay? Cheif o'brien? Cause the show ran concurrently for a bit. WHY DONR WORF AND DEANNA GET MARRIED THEYRE LIKE PERFECT???? What the fuck is that guy with the ears damar? Gamar? I think its damar? Idk. Why he look like that? IS RO GOING TO DIE??

Oh hey i get to meet sisko, hes cool. He gets like visions or some shit. Q doesnt like him i think "picard never hit me ):" "im not picard."

Q and Quark. Odo and Q. Do we get to see the cunty judge outfit again? Why does he have a mustache when hes boxing sisko or whatever?

OH I GET TO SEE FUCK ASS DUKAT THEOW DARTS AT HIM EVIL. Fun.

Okay yeah im done

[pumpkinsy0]

Tips on how to write Curly,Tim, and Angela Shepard??

asking MEEEE how to write the shepards??? im rubbing my hands together evilly i feel so honored to b asked this thank u sm<33

BUT, here r some important characteristics for their characters i think could help for writing em!! ill try to focus on things that r like, skimmed passed??? in fics??idk how to explain it

tim

-tim is a cool and collected guy, at most hes scarily calm!!! he has a good head on his shoulders and hes not ignorant to the problems in his life, and almost nothing gets past him, he knows whats wrong w his family and is very observant of it, unlike angela and curly. when it comes to tim, make sure things like his inner monologue and his movements is pretty composed and self controlled. when he thinks, he doesnt think half way, hes an analyzer and he dissects the world around him and tries seeing it for what it truly is, he doesnt let his emotions control him.

-he will always, ALWAYS, have his guard up!! even if its w small things like glancing around, always having back up plans, asking questions about before he even hangs out w em, etc etc, he can never be too sure, and he LIKES being informed, it bothers him so much if hes not, so hes always looking out. on top of that, on a regular ass day, i dont think hes OBVIOUSLY protective of angela and curly, he knows how they get when they feel cornered so he kinda???lets them do whatever???? tim being protective comes off as someone whos more annoyed than anything, other than someone who loves their family

for example he says things like: “i already said no, stop asking”, “didnt i tell u to bring ur blade with u”, things like that!!

-and finally, i think the only way u could actually get tim to b emotional, is if something happened to angela or curly. theyre literally his life lines, if it wasnt for them, he wouldve booked it half way across the country already. tim would be way more hostile and aggressive, its like hes coming apart, but thats rlly only when hes alone, out in public hes still pretty stoic but still agitated a bit more easily. everything he does at the end of the day is for them and while it may not seem like it, hes always thinking of them.

ps: hes quite honestly a lone wolf, he doesnt rlly have friends, ppl he hangs out w, ofc but friends??? eh, hes perfectly fine w being left alone w his own life, but thrives off of being around ppl bc he can use them to his advantage to further himself, but i dont say that in a “mwahahahah hes so manipulative and stone cold hearted😈” way

basically: for writing tim, make sure hes always coming off as a leader, hes always gonna have leadership qualities in whatever he does, so even the small things he does is important, it doesnt matter hiw small u think it is, if u feel like it shows his character, just add it in there. tim does have his limits, and its always gonna b curly and angela. kinda like darry, how he shows how he cares is just different and not understood, however for tim its to a higher degree.

NOW FOR CURLY☝🏽☝🏽

-im not gonna sit here n say that hes book smart, bc generally speaking, hes not, and this may b a bit controversial, but i dont think hes 100% street smart either!!! BUT hes not completely DUMB. while yes, hes not particularly smart in one aspect, hes not CLUELESS, he can grasp complex things and knows what to do, just not everything. ppl undermine him and overplay his stupidity so theyre surprised when he shows that he can b smart, and thats if they DO even realize that, its small when he shows hes smart, but he can have his moments, pls dont write curly as completely incompetent</333

for example: maybe tims trying to come up w a plan and bc curly knows the schedule of these ppl, hes actually a big help, but ppl just dont pay attention to how important that part of the plan was so they dont realize it, maybe ponys ranting to curly about something, and curly got pony to see another side of it he never rlly thought of before, but bc of how he said it, it doesnt “come off as intelligent” but it rlly is!!! i hope this made sense😭

-part of the reason of why he acts out is bc he looks up to tim, but hes not seen as smart like tim OR angela is, hes constantly compared to them both and while he loves being a shepard and loves his siblings, he wants to b seen as his own person and make something of himself!!! this however, can get him into trouble bc hes desperate to prove himself, to who??? to himself, to tim, and to a degree everyone else. im not gonna say curlys “all bark, no bite” bc he isnt, but he can definitely talk more than what he can rlly deliver and that gets him into shit as well and also thats what causes ppl to play up his stupidity. curly is pretty misunderstood and pushed to the side!!!

-i would say that curly being around others is important to write bc i feel like thats when he truly flourishes as a character. hes way more energized and pumped up, so when u write about curly around friends or whoever hes close to, make sure hes more relaxed, boisterous, and adventurous. however, when hes upset, id say hes sorta like tim, his eyes r the same, bit more analytical, and he uses the ppl around him. becomes less of a friend, more like a leader, hes not all buddy buddy, and if they try to joke around w him while hes mad, he pushes them away, tells them to shut up, its like a complete 180.

-if u wanna write about curly going through something, i feel like its important to realize that hes in denial about the problems in his life, not ignorant about it, its pretty in his face, its not like he cant say its not there, but hes just like “yea its bad, but its not THAT bad, i could push through it”, i think thats his way of coping w everything around him, but when hes pushed far enough and forced to come to terms w it, he does some irrational things to cope and turns to drinking

and last but definitely not least, my main girl angela

-she NEEDS to b around ppl, she THRIVES off of the attention of others and if she doesnt get it, shes on edge, she rlly doesnt like being left alone w her thoughts and needs something to distract her. and just like how curly and her r tims life lines, same could b said for curly and tim w angela. she needs her brothers as her support, and if they arent there, she tries to find it in other people, even if its only for a few weeks. bc of this, when it comes to this part of her character, in writing, id say that if u rlly want to make angela go through it, but for her problem to b solved, she goes to either tim or curly, BUT if u want to show that shes really desperate to b heard out, and she feels trapped in a corner, she tries to find comfort in someone else, usually through a romantic relationship. id say that it perfectly shows that for angela, her family means everything to her and she goes to them, BECAUSE she knows they have her back, but when she goes to try and find comfort in other ppl, it doesnt rlly work out or doesnt change, so shes just reminded that “at the end of the day, all u have us ur family and nobody else, ever”, which is a huge thing in her mind as thats just how shes grown up

•now, im sure we all see the shepards as poc, and considering this is the 60s (or 70s or whatever time period it rlly doesnt even matter, poc have never rlly been respected), i think to a degree, angela is sexualized, but its also a way she protects herself. i dont think angela is respected and thats for a multitude of reasons, its bc shes a woman, shes a shepard, and shes a poc, cards r pretty stacked against her. BUT, shes not clueless☝🏽, tim taught her from a young age about the world around her, bc he NEEDED to, its to SAVE her from getting taken advantage of. so to protect herself, she uses the things stacked against her, against em, she knows how hard it is to fight it, so why fight it when u can use it to help u is the way she sees it. and her being sexualized is just one of those things. angela in town is seen as “the forbidden fruit” ig u could say and she knows about it, so she uses the way how ppl see her as an object to use them as her puppet. they dont think shes aware so they dont rlly suspect much from her, hell, they dont even think she can fight, and theyre wrong w that. they just see her as an “easy” girl and if thats what they think, so be it, she’ll fuck w em one day, thats just her survival tactic and how she can survive. as far as this one goes, id say that its important to understand how the ppl around her interact w/see her, as that can help u understand what her next course of action will b, she NEEDS people in order to further herself, shes like tim in that aspect. however it will also somewhat impact how she sees herself, at the end of the day, shes still vulnerable but she doesnt let on, shes spent such a long time trying to cultivate how she wants ppl to see her and she doesnt want that ruined, she’ll do anything to keep that intact, ESPECIALLY lying. so if u want to write her coming loose emotionally, dont add small hints of it when shes in front of other ppl, MAYBE only when shes in front of tim or curly u can do that, if u wanted. in front of other ppl, she hardens up and comes off a little more smarter than she lets off, so she CAN b scary, and thats when ppl remember that shes a shepard. shes too grown for her own good but she just wants control in her life.

-speaking of her life, like curly, shes in denial about the things in her life, but its more so about how they impact HER. she knows their life is completely fucked, she knows how bad it is, but she just says it just doesnt hurt her as much, and to a degree, shes right, but then again, some days r harder for her than others, so while yes, shes vulnerable, this doesnt mean that she cant handle what tim and curly go through, shes not fragile, and i think thats important to remember, shes tough!!!she has to b, she will bite back if she has to. dont JUST write her in high school dramas, she has to deal w some of the gang issues curly goes through, while not AS much, its still there

-ANNDDDD FINALLLYYY, when it comes to angela, while yes, she is analytical, but she can let emotions drive her sometimes, and thats potentially her downfall, shes a pretty impatient person, so when she wants results, she wants it FAST, and it agitates her deeply if things dont go her way, some leadership qualities from tim rubbed off on her, she acts more like tim while curly looks more like him. when it comes to her inner dialogue, u should have a comfortable mix of her being observant and her having a bitttt confident and self assured, let her b a lil cocky!!!

i hope this helped u at least a little bit<3333

[be-good-to-bugs]

hm

[kwoojii]

why Player/Brain (Plain if u will) is already a great ship

1) its angsty

player doesnt remember anything from their previous life, but dont you think theyd be curious? Brain holds all the memories, but brain knows that the tragedy would be overwhelming for player. This could lead to some potential dilemma on how to tell player. Alternatively, brain could also be blunt (as always) but this would still overwhelm player. This would lead to potential hurt/comfort and apology scenes between the two. Additionally, brain is the sole survivor in khml Scala from the tragedy of daybreak town. I would imagine its alienating and lonely, especially without chirithy. Seeing player must give him relief, but when player tells him they dont remember anything, brain is back to square one. Players memories, though forgotten, are not lost. The more the duo spends time together, the more they can grieve what was lost. Together they can make new friends and turn a new page, for themselves and the future

2) unlikely friends (therefore its funny)

Khux player is canonically not talkative and brain is not the type to talk bc hes friendly. I doubt brain saw player as a friend and player probably did not consider brain as a close friend. But with khml, theyre probably scrutinized for being the odd ones out in scala. Two outsiders (clodleth fam youll like this) finding company with each other, though they may have different views on how to make friends. Id imagine their friendship is a clumsy one, but theyd learn that they compliment e/o quite well. With their undying loyalty, grievances for ephemer and their friends, willingness to sacrifice themselves, and openness to learn about each other, i think they would trust eo the most in khml. They can also be hilariously blunt so bickering would def be their love language

3) brain (lol) and brawn

Brain sent player to go check out grand central station while brain stayed back to do the lore lifting, must i say more? You cannot tell me brain would be fascinated with players rusted starlight and send them out for data

4) default black and white duo/light and darkness duo

Default player is shown to wear white clothes with blond hair, meanwhile brain has black hair with black attire. We love our black n white duos (ie skuld/eph, xeha/eraqus, brain/eph, bugs bunny n daffy duck). They r aesthetically pleasing!!!

5) last bit, but they wouldnt even realize theyre in love this ship lives off the foundation of complete hurt/comfort and trust, not romance

They are slow burn to the max, if anything. They protect eo in battle ferociously, but only bc they need eo for their respective goals. They sleep in the same bed to comfort eo for nightmares but they arent friends. Brain cooks breakfast, but— 🤓

Anyway as khml comes out and we may not get any plain crumbs at all, pls remember me at my grave 😚🙏 i ofc will be sticking around for the plot. Im so excited for khml AAAA

[raven-the-claw]

A Complete Guide To Chaotic Academia

bc its my fav aesthetic and there is not enough content about it

Outfits

most people say that chaotic academia is just dark academia but a little bit more messy, and, well, chaotic. the truth is, chaotic academia is A LOT more messy than dark academia. you can still use dark academia as kind of a "base", but you are going to replace your blazers with flannels, your turtlenecks with tshirts. as for pants, you can go with litteraly anything: cigarette pants, tailored trousers, ripped-up jeans or normal black leggings. i personally really ike ripped up overalls bc they give that "i dont really give a damn, im so misunderstood, my parents didnt love me, im a crazy lonely introverted teenage child" vibe...idk. whatever you wear, make sure you feel comfortable in it! even tho in chaotic academia there are almost no rules at all, here are some things that might help you!

colours: any earthy tones are fine, brown, caramel, dark green, dark red, white, etc etc

fictional characters that might inspire you:

-remus lupin

- any dpc character

- jess mariano

- sydney novak

accesories: flannels (a personal fav + they make even the most boring fit look better), cardigans, converse (bonus points if you draw/write on them or if you have them laced in a weird way), bracelets or necklaces that mean something to you, harry potter back packs, tote bags...

hairstyles: whatever you want, just make sure your hair is ALWAYS messy, looking like you just fucking woke up

Activities and Traits

ok now we're getting to the actually important part bc (repeat after me): chaotic academia is not about how you look, its about how you live and how you act. so here r some thing that might help:

- annotating books with the most unhinged random thoughts

- learning poetry or speeches word for word but not remembering most of the things for school

- studying in the (school) library and being besties with the librarian (optional)

- leaving notes (on trees, mailboxes or library books) for strangers to find

- "studying while listening to classical music" and then instead of studying you end up agressivly mouthing your favorite song

- im sure yall already heard this one, but yes, swearing and slag while discussing deep academic topics is incredibly important

- speaking of important topics: posting something important on social media knowing no one will read it

- doodles on your hands 24/7 (NO SUSAN, I DONT GIVE A DAMN THAT ITS BAD FOR MY SKIN)

- sarcasm. a lot.

- random thoughts

- random quotes

- knowing a ton of conspiracy theories that you dont even beileve in by heart

- listening to all different types of podcasts

- one day reading the classics, the next ya fantasy and day after that ao3 smut

- multifandom, multishipper

- tea/coffee addiction

- adding b.c. to todays date when writing it in school

- random thoughts and the weirdest annotations in your school notebooks, especially the classes that you find boring

- "going to the bathroom" and then spending half of your math class drawing/reading/smoking/crying/thinking/whatever the fuck you wanna do there bc ur tired of everything

- stealing random stuff from stores (tho it is not encouraged blah blah blah)

- watching gilmore girls every fall

- telling people ur favorite colour is green even tho it isnt just to let them know that ur gay

- reading in class, on breaks, at home, parks, meetings, aethletic events, and generally all the fucking time

- doing (mostly) everything last minute

- bad at photography, but you enjoy it

- cold tea my beloved

- wearing one item every day: it can either be a necklace, a flannel, a bracelet, a badge, headphones, earrings etc etc

- extremely messy handwriting, always writing with black pen

- crying at least once a day, but only when ur alone, being super emotional but never showing it

- hobbies include reading, screaming in your pillow, learning unique languages that you will probably never use, rewatching dead poets society, harry potter, enola holmes, end of the fucking world and gilmore girls

- massive bookworm, reads all the time, always has a book with them

- skipping class, not that often tho

- 💫anger issues💫

- hyperactive and lazy at the same time

- uses big words but makes fun of other people when they do it

- writes (rebellious) book quotes everywhere, every single one of their notebooks had IF WE BURN, YOU BURN WITH US written in them lol

- random useless powerpoints

- analysing taylor swift's folklore and evermore instead of sheakspeare because its just better

- retired almost-emo, had a phase when they wore black and acted all mysterious but were never really emo i cant explain it

- likes mcr. this one speaks for itself.

- gay and sad. no explanation needed.

Books, Movies and Music

Books:

- Harry Potter by you know who (WE DONT SUPPORT HER THO)

- The Secret History by Donna Tartt

- Night School by CJ Daugherty (is that how u spell it lol)

- The Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

- Heartstopper by Alice Oseman

- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

- Emma by Jane Austen

- Hamlet by Do I Really Need To Say Who

- The Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

- The Picture of Dorain Gray by Oscar Wilde

- Frankenstein by Marry Shelley

Movies/TV Shows

- end of the fucking world

- heartstopper

- harry potter

- enola holmes

- dead poets society

- gilmore girls

- httyd (no kidding lol)

im not really a film girlie so if yall have any recs please lmk

Music:

- Mother Mother

- Taylor Swift (obviously)

- Lana Del Slay

- Conan Gray

- Olivia Rodrigo

- My Chemical Romance

- Lovejoy

- Bowie

- Queen

- Radiohead

- Björk

- Those random Disney songs i know you scream to at 3am

also whoever sings the IMJUSTATEENAGEDIRTBAGBAABBYY song

here is my playlist if yall wanna listen to it

hope that helps lol

[darkcircles4lyfe]

hi hello ive just come from your enneagram 9 izuku post and i am just OVERWHELMED with joy & excitement after reading it, everything you said just feels so RIGHT!!

(i am a nine myself & have always felt weirdly attached to izuku in that he felt soso similar to me in such a weirdly specific way but i couldn't really explain why i just Got Him until now, so thanks for that little boost of validation lol)

with your post in mind, i couldn't stop thinking about this line from 412 and it got me curious if you had any additional thoughts on it/read it the same way i did:

the moment i read this line i immediately took a screenshot & filed it away in my Important Izuku Moments file, like idk! the wording of it, the way he's talking about shigaraki but could SO easily be talking about himself, that honestly devastating panel of the tears in his eyes...

we've gotten plenty of hints about izuku's emotional suppression (that 'heroes dont cry' scene with iida & todoroki, his flashback of all might telling him to 'stop being such a cry baby' during the afo fight, the whole 'control your heart' plotline...) but THIS line in particular feels so significant for some reason. maybe cause this could easily be izuku recognizing himself in/through shigaraki? maybe bc it is so close to izuku acknowledging the lid hes put on his own sad & lonely past? maybe bc this is the closest we've ever gotten to izuku saying i'm not okay, even if he isn't actually talking about himself yet?

im trying really hard not to ramble too much in your inbox lol, but everything you said in your post about tomura & izuku really hit home for me, i think you're so right about them. and this line in particular is what makes me think we really are going to see some version of tomura being the one to finally break through (Decay) izuku's emotional blocks & barriers (something something locked door imagery), and that just makes me really excited. for both of them :')

YAY!! I’m so glad to hear you resonated with it. It’s otherwise a bit of a “if you know you know” sort of situation, and it felt good to actually explain it.

I had a “!” moment with that panel too, and also when he says he’s determined to break through Tomura’s barrier, expose and acknowledge his pain.

My immediate thought was, “Oh hey, I’m definitely not making this shit up after all, because Horikoshi is obviously intending to confront the concept of bottling up your emotions/your past. He literally just stated it. We're on the same page.” While it didn’t directly confirm anything about Izuku, it's at least something he is aware of, which is an important first step. There's a line in Sleeping At Last's 'Nine' that I was thinking about a lot as I was writing the latter part of that post: "I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes," which speaks to a need for Tomura to be Izuku's mirror, so that he can see himself.

Also, the revelation that Izuku is clinging to the idea that everyone has a "human heart" deep down is pretty clearly applicable to himself too, implying that he's dealing with a lack of self worth (a lot of Japanese fans were talking about this, and I think it doesn't come across as easily in English). I really love how Kudou clarified that Izuku is not naive for this. It's not the same as being blissfully ignorant to how cruel people can be. It's more like, "I need to believe in the worth of others or else I can't believe in myself." That's... so painful and beautiful.

I'm also excited for what comes next! Very soon!

[sunnnfish]

Due to the mental anguish I am rambling about tbhk. I WAS going to put this under a readmore but that keeps breaking the post on mobile so. Im sorry. Tons of spoilers for chapter 99. And like the whole series. You know how it is.

I feel like I need to make an itemized list because there’s so fucking much I need to talk about right now

The violence and parallels to tsukasa. I mean who can forget tsukasa prying mitsubas mouth open to feed him number 3s heart. Who knows what tsukasa’s intentions were but they weren’t necessarily bad— as we know now mitsuba needs to eat to survive plus number 3 was like a pretty big power boost that would keep him together for a longer time. So he likely just wanted mitsuba to live comfortably. BUT ALSO there’s the beginning of the chapter where tsukasa tells mitsuba to dig the heart out himself vs kou who gets it for him. Anyways. With kou here it clearly came from a similar place of wanting mitsuba to not disappear. There’s a desperation to it and fear and it’s one I personally actually know quite well. I’ve dealt with friends refusing to eat and take care of themselves and it is a violent frustrating feeling that just ends with crying after the anger fades. There’s a lot of confusion like. Why do you not care about yourself as much as I care about you. Anyways. His actions make a lot of sense to me bc I have felt and done the exact same things.

Me core ^

and THEN there’s mitsubas feelings of wanting to be fucking exorcised and going to the fucking minamoto household to do it there’s so much here hang on. Like. I think he went to the minamoto house for some sliver of hope. If he wanted to for sure disappear he probably could’ve waited it out or something better but he went to the place where, depending on who answered the door, he’d either die or be faced with fucking. Kou minamoto. And the fact the he chose to reveal himself to kou it’s like. Did you really want to disappear. Did you really. And then taking him out on a fucking date basically like. You don’t want to disappear do you. You just don’t want to be. This. He wants to be human. He wants someone who will understand him and. And. Kou so readily accepts and understands him. Even the parts he thinks are ugly or unworthy. Fuck.

AND THEN. Kous feeling of inadequacy and fearing that mitsuba trusts tsukasa more than him and connecting to the vision he saw in the red house. Whether he accepts it or not he wants mitsuba to need him. The red house showed him a mitsuba who told him that he needs kou that he wants kou to be a supernatural with him and he brushes it away knowing mitsuba would never say that to him. He tells himself that mitsuba would never trust him or want him like that but he wants it to be real and he’s still hurt when the real mitsuba won’t open up to him. And it all comes back to his overall self worth issues of wanting to be strong and dependable and worthy.

AND this is all under the context of Teru finally letting kou have some responsibility and telling him to go exorcise the low level spirit that came near their home and AaaaaAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUU. KOU MINAMOTO……..

God its just. Kou minamoto cares about mitsuba so so so much and neither of them completely understand the gravity of it all. Also at this point hes said like 3 times that mitsuba is the root of all his worries. ALSO dont even get me started on the art and expressions this chapter. It’s so gorgeous like as always but. God. Also the keychains. Im gonna[blaring truck horn]

ALSO the way mitsuba says at the end like ‘you’d be lonely without me’ or whatever and kou almost looks shocked for a second like. Oh. And its like he thinks about it more and cries more because yeah, he would be lonely. He’s been lonely. Mitsuba somehow inexplicably became like his closest friend that knows everything about him and god he was lonely when mitsuba disappeared. The first time and the second. And he’s barely had time to process any of it because to everyone else around him mitsuba doesnt really. Matter. And because kou is so kind he is always putting everyone else’s problems in front of his own. The severance happens and it becomes a journey to help nene bring hanako and aoi back—next to no mention mitsuba aside from the leads to the red house, much less trying to find and save him too. The whole time theyre in the boundary to the far shore its all about hanako and nene and number 6. And there’s STILL the conversation about how to become a supernatural that he brought up with nene but noooooo we cant ever know anything about what kou wants. And like. It all comes back around this chapter because he so so selfishly wants mitsuba to live. One of the only things he lets himself want. And it aches. God. I wish i was any good or natural at prose writing because god the things i would write about minamoto kou. AND TO TOP IT OFF HES LIKE FUCKING 14 YEARS OLD…. Okay. Okay im done.

[wetcatspellcaster]

Did you see Neil Newbon’s take that Ascended Astarion is the real him free to act on cruelty and violence and the spawn is the one with the mask? Yeesh.

Ooooooh, THAT'S the disk horse that's happening right now!! I knew something was happening (I felt a tremor in the waters) but I had no clue what it was lmao, I don't follow cast stuff.

I will try to respond to this in good faith, but I'm not very good at fandom discourse and so I'm afraid it may not be the answer you want.

I can see why that reading might make people angry, but I dont have strong feelings about it. Obviously, it's not my take on Ascension, but from the beginning I've been very upfront that my take is serving the genre I'm writing in and the ship dynamics I find hot. My Tav is lawful good to an unhealthy extreme, and that was how she was conceived in her Early Access bullying phase. And meanwhile, I wanted to be in a Gothic horror where he's obsessed (morality chains will do that to you) and they beat the shit out of each other. I have to make the Ascendent a monster, for that to work, and for people not to feel guilty every time they enjoy watching him getting stepped on lmao.

But I do feel like there is a morality policing around Astarion's ending that I don't want to partake in. This might seem dumb for me to say, given that my Tav is a veritavle walking moral policeman, but that is bc I fucking love Villain/Heroine ships, so I am literally right there, at the Devil's Sacrament with everyone else.

While I like the good ending and prefer it for many reasons, I would agree with a reading of Newbon's words that it could be read as a mask. This might be bc I mask with the best of them, am doing it right now even as I write and edit this ask 20 times. There's masking as an outright lie, and then there's masking as 'gotta get through day to day life as a functional adult without everyone suddenly deciding they hate me'... I personally think its nice that spawn!Astarion cares about other people, and cares about being a functional member of society at all! It shows he's no longer a lonely outcast.

I could also go deeper (the autism really shining through in this reply) and say it's a mask, in the sense that this has been deemed the 'polite' and morally correct ending, that is acceptable to others and enables the player to feel good about themselves. Which is often a way we derive pleasure from media, and not wrong in and of itself! Making Astarion good makes players feel good - that's not wrong, but if we're comparing endings, we have to acknowledge it. An Ascended Ending doesn't really cater to that impulse... unless the player really likes to be dommed (more power to them).

Unfortunately anon, I can't sit here with my most popular fic being an Ascended!Astarion fic, and pretend that there isn't a bunch of fascination or interest surrounding the Ascended version of his character. People clearly want to explore the implications of his evil ending and indulge in the excess of it, but feel bad doing so. People don't ascend him in-game, but they go to my fic and other people's fic because they want to have some space to enjoy the implications - in the sexiness, in the timeline where Astarion has revenge, in a timeline where he is obsessed with Tav etc. I mean, just look at me, I can't sit through the Ascended scene, but I'm here writing a fic about it!!

The fact that it seems to happen more in fic than in playthroughs tells me, if I was to get super deep in a tumblr ask, that people feel guilt about it. Some kind of mask is being employed, by someone, somewhere, in that mix. So I'm not about to add to any of that kind of policing. It would be pretty disingenuous of me to get my most feedback from an Ascendent fic I am writing, and then judge people for liking Ascendency narratives...

So while I don't have much interest in pretending the evil ending isn't the evil ending, that doesn't sound to me (second hand, through you, with my brain seeing 7 or 8 different implications) to be what Newbon is saying. He's just saying that the Ascendent is the less palatable Astarion to other people and that spawn!Astarion still has some kind of mask or a politeness filter on. Which... yeah. Kinda. In my world, I like that Astarion decides its worthwhile to restrain himself, because he has things to care about potentially ruining. But that's still in many ways employing restraint. People don't just stop masking, they learn to care about what others think in a healthy way. They have friendships, relationships, other ties to the world, that make them want to be something other than a cruel or violent or evil version of themselves. I think that's nice, and far less lonely but um... yeah. I can see Newbon's point, even if I don't want to like, live or die by it.

[stateswscarlet]

Not really an accusation, but I think that there isnt enough attention paid in the loa community for lonely people.

I read so many advice to live a life etc but I am honestly so lonely. I only have 2 friends (who have a very busy social life so I don't see them often) and no sp (broke up with me for another girl, while I'm still in love). I try to do hobbies like art, doing a new class, to distract myself a bit and because it's something that interests me, I have dating apps etc, but every time going to something alone or doing activities alone makes me so deeply unhappy, especially now that summer is coming and I see everyone doing things together.

If I had something to do it would make manifestation so much easier, but because I'm just so lonely it's hard not to put my desires on a pedestal

i used to feel like this for the longest time!! I literally remember feeling so mad whenever I would see “go live your life!” early on when i was newer bc as an introvert who has a small circle and is kind of a homebody, i felt awkward forcing myself to do things for the sake of manifestation.

i completely understand how you feel, its super nerve wracking to do things alone especially when all our friends have other friends or have plans/live far. but i promise you, you taking small steps toward doing stuff even once in two weeks will help SO SO much. yes its uncomfortable but if we always stay in our comfort zone we will never get anywhere, both manifesting wise and life-actions wise.

ask yourself why u feel unhappy, is it bc you feel left out? is it bc ur comparing urself to others? is it bc in the past u unconsciously relied on others company? whatever comes up, it is your responsibility to dismantle and shift away from that. theres nothing wrong with liking being with others or preferring it, but theres a difference between that and being upset when theyre not with you. im telling you rn, your friends and sp even if they surrounded you and showered you with love all the time, its never going to stop you from feeling empty or lonely, it may distract you temporarily but it will never fill your cup if youre not already whole and complete without others.

please see your desires as normal and something you can live without and more importantly be HAPPY without. you dont need it, you choosing to be fulfilled is smth youre choosing for yourself, it wont come in and save you and make you any less lonely.