#and it has an extra layer of gross added for me personally

[skyedancer2006]

The struggle of loving the concept of Leviathantale but not being able to follow any artists out of fear that they’re pr*ship since the AU creator is-

[the-witty-pen-name]

The Honeymoon Pt. 1: Friday

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY 

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: fluff, smut, unprotected sex, cursing, age gap (reader is around 28, Lee is about 45 now) 

Summary: Following the events of Deadbeat, Lee surprises the Reader with the Honeymoon they never had. 

A/N: This is unedited and if I miss anything I should include as a warning, please let me know!

Series Masterlist

“Are you sure they’ll be okay?” you ask, watching as the house disappear from view from the side mirror. Lee took your hand in his and then brought it up to press a kiss to the back of your hand. You sigh contently, letting yourself rest into the seat.

“They are in good hands,” Lee reassured you. “They’ll run around, tire out the sitter and be in bed by the time we get to the cabin.”

“But after that?”

“It’ll repeat until we get back Sunday,” Lee chuckles. “They won’t miss us,” he jokes, referencing the fact your two sons were much more preoccupied with the cartoon on the television than the two of you when you had headed out.

You smile, and you know it’s just a long weekend. You deserve the chance to relax. Ms. Hanlon was more than qualified and you knew you left the boys in good hands. It was your first time away from them though, and that tugged at you.

“This is long overdue,” you smile, shaking the worry from your mind and focusing your attention to the trip Lee surprised you with. “Two children and no honeymoon,” you tease.

“Maybe we’ll get a head start on a third,” he jokes.

“Maybe,” you grin, biting your lip.

The two of you got married quickly, and wanted nothing more than to start your life together that a honeymoon hadn’t even been brought up as a possibility. Lee had taken on a lot of extra shifts lately and only last week did he announce he was taking you on your honeymoon.

“I wanted to take you on a trip for a while, sweetheart,” Lee explained when he was showing you the pictures of the cabin after telling you. “We can afford it now, and you deserve a break.”

“Lee, you didn’t have to do this, this looks so expensive,” you trail off, but he presses a kiss to your temple.

“You deserve it, baby,” he whispered, and then pressed kisses down your neck. “Putting up with me.”

The cabin was picturesque and it took your breath away seeing it in person. The log cabin sat far back into the Virginian woods, and all the snow that encompassed everything remained untouched like a blanket over everything. The snow at home was an annoyance, gross from cars and pedestrians and it hurt your backs to shovel. Here, it was magical.

The cabin’s roof was covered with shiny untouched snow and the rails also gathered up small mounds as well. You almost hated to get out of the car because you knew your footprints were going to ruin the scene. Both of you were bundled up in layers of heavy sweaters and bulky winter coats, and must have looked silly trying to walk through the snow with your overnight bags.

Kicking your boots off on the rubber mat that was in the entryway, the both of you laughed trying to peel off all of your outer layers. Your hats and scarves were hung up on hooks next to the coat rack. Once you were both left in just your jeans and heavy sweaters, Lee insisted on dealing with the bags later, urging you to just leave them in the entryway.

The cabin was homey, and smelled like firewood and pine. The small stairs led up to a cozy bedroom and the bathroom. The first floor with a kitchen built for two and a living room stocked with blankets and a stunning brick fireplace.

“Lee,” you mumble in disbelief looking around at the living room. “It’s perfect.”

He wraps his arms around your waist from behind and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“And you hear that?” he whispers in your ear, and then presses a kiss behind your ear and then down your neck.

“No?”

“Exactly,” he replies and you can feel his grin against your skin. “No crying, no nothing, just us.”

“We should really unpack the food and put it in the kitchen,” you sigh, before his hands travel too far up your sweater. He pouts.

“I’ll do it,” he smirks, pulling you in for a kiss. “Wait for me upstairs.” You grab his and your bags of clothes and head upstairs.

The stairs led up to a spacious bedroom that was the whole top floor of the little cabin. You could hardly contain your excitement about being here that you hardly gave yourself a moment to take in the loft room. You quickly left the bags on the floor of the closet on the fair side of the room and then quickly stripped down to just your bra and panties to get out of the clothes that were wet from the snow outside.

The bed was covered in heavy blankets and pillows. Sliding under the duvet, you can’t help but grin at the feeling of the sheets against your skin. It felt so luxurious even though it was just a little cabin. You lay on your stomach and settle in to try to warm yourself up from the cold and you tug the blankets up to your chin. The cold felt like it ran right through your body and into your bones. The feeling of the warm blankets made a perfect contrast against your chilled skin.

Lee never thought he’d be able to pin point a time when he felt even more in love with you. Guilt would tug at the back of his mind, reminding him none of this was something he deserved. You and the life you made for him: the house, your two boys… how could he ever come close to giving you something that big in return.

He got the idea for the trip several months back. He sat at the desk in the back office at work, his eyes glued to the security cameras that were just fixed on empty hallways. It was one of his overnight shifts at the museum. He needed to let his eyes rest from the screens, and he decided to take a walk around.

He wasn’t ever one to pay attention or appreciate art before. He never had the luxury. But now, he liked to walk around the place when he could- gradually working his way through the whole building. He takes the same walk all the time, but every time he manages to find something different. The only sounds are the thoughts running through his head and the sound of his shoes echoing in the dark hallways. Of course, he’s thinking about you. You never complained but like him, you hate the nights you spend sleeping alone because of his work schedule.

He thinks about you, tucking the boys into bed alone. Then going through the steps of your own night routine and skin care, and how tonight he’s not there sitting up and already in bed watching you keep going from your vanity to the bathroom. You’d mumble to yourself, and get lost in the familiar rhythm of your routine while Lee is content to just look at you. You’d make fun at him for staring, but he doesn’t even care.

Wandering the hallways, he ends up at the information desk and notices, people left a bunch of catalogues and brochures scattered on the desk’s surface. He starts placing the brochures back in their proper cubbies and then gathers up the magazines to place them in the proper baskets. Without really giving it a second thought, he tucks one under his arm to flip through when he gets back to his own desk.

Flipping through the tourist catalogue, it was mostly ads for local businesses- restaurants and sights you and him had visited countless times already. He wasn’t really even paying attention to what he was reading, more so just skimming, until he saw the advertisements for the cabin towards the middle of the magazine. A two-page spread with pictures and convincing write-ups about the little getaway. Secluded and romantic, and just the perfect place for him to make up for the times lately he’s been away.

He couldn’t believe he had been able to pull off the surprise without you finding out, and the way your face lit up made all the extra shifts he had taken on made it all worth it.

“You sleeping, honey?” Lee asks, walking over to the bed as he kicks off his boots.

“No, just trying to warm up,” you answer, your face peeking out from under the covers. “You need to get out of those wet clothes, or you’re going to get sick.”

Lee nods in agreement, kicking off his socks and then pulling off his sweater. He untucks his tshirt from his pants before pulling it over his head and tossing it on to the floor with his other wet clothes.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he chuckles, when he catches how your eyes are following his every movement. You shrug.

“You’re nice to look at,” you tease. He scoffs and continues to strip out of his pants until he’s left in just his boxers. He slides into the bed next to you, and pulls you close to him.

“Can’t believe we’re here,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’m sorry it couldn’t be sooner…”

“SHHH,” you gesture pressing a finger to his lips.

“You deserve so much more than me…”

“Shh,” you press a soft kiss to his lips. “That’s not true,” you mumble, sliding your hand down his chest.

He kisses you back tentatively, and cups your face with his hand as he turns on his side to face you. His other hand gazes your side and settles on your hip, pulling you closer as his thumb grazes the waistband of your panties.

He’d imagined the first night here to be much more frantic, rough and desperate. Now, he’s realizing that there is such a luxury of time here, and he can afford to waste hours with you just like this. He wants to take his time with you, at least for now.

He slides his hand further down your body and he grips the back of your thighs, and he practically kneads your skin there, massaging and just letting his hands feel the softness of your skin. You let out a soft moan, and he smiles. He swells with pride knowing after all this time, he still has this affect on you.

Your hands rest on his chest, and you can’t help but let your hands wander up his arms and shoulders and then up his back, and you feel him shiver at the feeling of your nails grazing his skin. He pulls away from the kiss, and ducks down to kiss and bite on your neck and collarbone. He moves his hands up to hold your back as he repositions you both so he’s hovering over you. You sit up slightly to reconnect your lips with his and he seizes the opportunity to unhook your bra and tosses it somewhere onto the floor with the rest of the discarded clothes.

“Beautiful,” he sighs, pulling you back in for a heated kiss, his thumb stroking your cheek gently, as his hand rests on your jaw. His other hand runs down your side, and you can feel how warm his hands are compared to your skin. You run your hand through his hair as his tongue slides into your mouth. You gasp when you hear the ripping of fabric.

“Lee!” You exclaim when you realize he just ripped your panties off. You watch with wide eyes as he just tosses the torn material behind him like he did nothing and he has the most satisfied smirk on his face.

“What is it, honey?” he asks, leaning down and whispering in your ear, sounding innocent. He kisses just under your earlobe gently, almost like his lips barely grazed your skin. “Tell me what you want,” he says, and you can hear the amusement in his voice as you whimper at the feeling of his hands squeezing the sensitive skin of your thighs.

“You want my fingers, baby?” he asks, inching his hands closer up and pressing little kisses down your jaw and neck as he rubs teasingly on your clit. You can’t help but moan, and your hips move in response to his touches. You whimper, desperate for more attention from him. “Or do you want my tongue, sugar?” he mumbles before kissing you again and letting his tongue explore your mouth. You are an absolute mess already. Needy and desperate, practically unable to hold still because of the way he was still teasing you. “Tell me, sugar. Let me give you everything you want.”

“Your cock,” you manage to let out breathlessly, tugging at the waist of his boxers, “Please, honey… Lee, I need you so badly.”

“I love you,” he exhales against your skin, pressing kisses down your neck and chest as he pulls off his boxers. “Fuck, sweetheart, I can’t tell you enough,” he groans, as he pumps his cock. “Fucking love you so much.”

“I love you,” you whisper back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer. His hands rest on the mattress so he’s hovering above you, and you moan as he presses into you. Your hands instinctively go to his shoulders and your sure you’re leaving little crescent indents behind on his skin. He knows your body so well and as he finds his rhythm; he can’t help but just mumble praises of how well you take him, and how beautiful you look.

He lifts one of your legs and rests it over his shoulder as he continues his movements, and you cry out at just how good he feels. He’s so captivated by you, the way your eyes flutter closed and you head falling back, the way your mouth gaps open at the sensation of his thrusts. He’s addicted to watching the way you react to him, even after all this time. He loves the feeling of moving to have your legs wrapped tightly around his waist, and the way your fingers comb through his short hair. He loves the gentle and soft feelings of your palms and how that contrasts with the scratching of your nails, leaving red marks in their wake as you explore his back like you have a million times before.

“Lee…” you gasp, your chest rising and falling quickly, “I’m so close.”

He reaches down and rubs your clit as he continues his pace, and you moan at how overwhelmingly good his hand makes you feel. He can feel you, and the way your body responds to him, and he can feel how close you are. He doesn’t even think about himself, until he knows you finish. He’s chasing your high, kissing your swollen lips, rubbing circles on your clit and quickening his pace as he fucks you into the mattress. You cry out at the feeling as you cum, and at the feeling of your release, Lee’s follows.

He collapses next to you, his chest rising and falling quickly as he tries to catch his breath. He looks over to you, wide smile spreading across his face as he looks at you in your haze of just pure bliss. He leans over and kisses your temple.

“I’ll run us a bath.”

Taglist:

@scar-is-bi @jiminlife2k18 @asylummaniac01 @rosalynshields @charmed-asylum @jamesbuchananbuckybarnes1917 @alexandrathegreat3 @hersilencedscreams @malar-region @purplerain85 @vesper852 @smilewolfdolan @softshell-taco @champagnebucky @lilacmeadows @mollygetssherlockcoffee @bluebouquetcupcake29 @stucky-my-ship @moonliightbabes @sassy-kassaay @lharrietg @bbmommy0902 @hoe-for-sebstan @weenersoilderr @zombicupcake3 @hersilencedscreams @myriadofmagic @adelaide-walker @thedepressolit @samanthadegaro @stiles-stilinski-24-dylan @rebekahdawkins @letsfly-andbe-free @swiftieandthewintersoldier @iraot @witchybarb @teenagemutant  @weenersoldierr @greeneyedblondie44 @acciosiriusblack @captainofallfandoms @buckistan @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog  @femme-xx-fatale @chrisevansseagletattoo @lostgirl23sthings @myfandomcatchall @lowercasegenius @iss-vona @alexfms97  @fleetwood-mack  @vintagepigeon​ @dangerdolns @unsaltedalmonds @weenersoldierr​ @cspr-2​

[roadkillramble]

Darkstalker : Great potential, shit execution

Aka me rambling about our favorite genocidal theater kid.

-----

The opinion on Darkstalker in the fandom has a tendency to be very polarized : one side sees him as a redeemable character that is placed as a victim in the story, and the other as complete villain who is completely unjustified in his actions and should have died.

I think (and far from me to imply I'm the only one, I've seen a few other take note of it) that both are facets of the character, and not entirely true or false. Darkstalker is an extremely complex character that is both thematically rich, representing the madness of animus dragons and magic itself, and the feud between nightwings and icewings, that can be interpreted as somewhat dragon racism in general if widened a bit, as well as complex to portray due to his history of both being abuser and abused.

And, since Tui is both a child book writer, and quite frankly not very good at handling more deep themes in realistic ways (especially when her characters are grounded in real people), it was,, quite frankly botched.

A character I tend to compare him to is Bane, the albinos rat that is the main antagonist of Chronicles of the Underland. That book serie has a few things i could comment on, but overall, it handles a lot better a lot of darker themes, including a villain that is "destined to greatness" and abused. Both Darkstalker and Bane are born to a bad father that abuses them. Both are given an opportunity to do better, but continue to spiral out of control, with in Bane's case an extra layer of manipulation. Both end up as tyrannical leaders of a group that wants to commit genocide on another, although Bane goes further and the books are a lot more explicit about his acts. However, where Bane explicitly ends as a villain, and is killed, the fate of Darkstalker is to be reborn, "rebooted", which I personally found extremely unsatisfying.

I'd say Bane is a good character. Although his abuse is a massive part contributing to who he is, it is not an excuse, as there is a very clear limit after which you cannot excuse his actions, no matter how misguided. This limit is more grey in Wings of Fire, as actions tend to have a lot less consequences, and deaths tend to almost be meaningless.

I think his character is portrayed in the two ways the fandom sees him as in the books, hence the clashing. And i think sticking to one or the other narrative would have made a lot more sense.

I usually stick to the true antagonist route : the whole of arc two has an underlaying theme of using magic to transform other as being extremely bad (which makes Darkstalker's fate all the more puzzling), and he's the antagonist that is almost represented by this action, in the murder of arctic, and his manipulation of... Pretty much everyone.

His abuse can be present without his portrayal being insensitive toward abuse recovery : wings of fire is chokeful of abused kids, and one can very much be used as his reflection. In fact, it's interesting to see how the arc 2 character parallel the ones of Darkstalker's time. Moonwatcher is treated somewhat like Clearsight, Turtle is directly compared to Fathom, and both Qibli and Winter have parallels to Darkstalker (and none of the two became murderous like him, although you could argue it is because of the lack of animus power as an option to do so).

I'd have enjoyed this being explored further in the books : I'm not sure what good end Darkstalker could meet, but it at least would serve as a very good way to be directly confronted to his own choices. Especially winter, who is so similar to him while being the very tribe he despises.

He could realize that his choices were his own, and after a time not "forced" by any hand, or deny it. I think portraying all of his actions as things to be forgiven because he is hurt to be extremely dangerous : after all, he does transform a young dragon into his dead girlfriend, which is,,, gross, especially since it's a mind controlled version of her that basically obeys him, manipulates everyone into liking him (this one is *not* the worst, but adding up the rest is,,, ehhh), as well as provoke a genocidal plague upon a whole tribe. Even on a one on one level, he is manipulative toward Moonwatcher and Clearsight, and tries to get anemone, a child, to murder her whole family, which... You can't really justify by having a bad dad.

If he was to be redeemed, it should be before these actions in the modern WOF era, and with a heavy side of introspection on his actions toward Clearsight and Moonwatcher.

I enjoy the idea that didn't go through being that Clearsight would be revived. Her being the one to bring darkstalker down, to finish the job, feels right. She could have matured, with her life being spent with ppl who were not abusive toward her. She could have reflected on Darkstalker, offer him another chance, but take it back if he does not change. I don't like the fact it's basically tui's self insert from what I understood, and i don't have a vision of her as this perfect person, but being the one closest to Darkstalker, she also is the one with the most even field, especially if she is born again from his magic, which could have some implications of bypassing his other spell, mostly bullshit to justify how she could be able to harm him.

Hope, too, could have been the one to bring him down, in the way Yellowfang brings down her child, brokenstar (yet another exemple of this sort of character).

Finally, Moonwatcher, Winter and Qibli as a trio could be very good as the ones to take down Darkstalker, with the help of kinka and turtle. I like the idea of each being able to break at a part of him, with turtle being the one that handles the whole magic part.

That's it for now, disjointed ramble over.

[shaftking]

I saw that anon about cis women being more transphobic than cis men, and lemme just say that in my experience a lot cishet women (typically self-identifed feminists, gee wonder why) don't see the problem with outing LGBT people. I saw a lot of that in school and now college (mostly cishet women making gay jokes about their gay/lesbian friends, out loud and with a "it's cause (s)he's gay" to boot if you asked to explain), and a recent example is that a coworker "friend" of mine outed me to a customer while half-joking about our "diverse" workplace, and she was legitimately suprised when I called her out on it (the real surprise is that she somehow didn't realize that showing a trans woman to stranger has a big chance of ending in hate crime, lmao)

Oof. Obviously men are perfectly capable of being transphobic and insensitive and I've heard my fair share of stories of men outing their coworkers or siblings or whatever, but when it comes to self-avowed feminists, there's an extra layer of gross added to it because they try to display themselves as being more accepting or allies to LGBT people while doing the same things as your average garden variety transphobe like outing people without their consent or not taking people's coming out with any weight or sincerity.

I think it's because they've gotten so personally comfortable with their commodified "oppression" and "activism" that they forget that some people still experience a real danger of being attacked, abused or harassed if strangers knew about their gender status.

[ladyyatexel]

I Went On A Manga Binge

So you don't have to

For those of you who have wisely avoided the shreds of it I've left around the blog thus-far, I had some weird notion to go re-experience Yu-Gi-Oh uuuuuh a week ago? We'll go with that. Time is meaningless.

I'd been able to read a good portion of the early manga at the end of highschool, and somewhere in my stacks and stacks of paper is fanart from this dark time, so you know I cared. I also still own a Dark Magician action figure somehow, so. I'd also watched a large portion of the anime with my brother because it had been laced with some kind of crack and we couldn't look away? I remember when we both were just like shit, wait, don't change the channel, I can't stop looking at it. And the next thing we knew we were waiting for new episodes and I was doing research on the Japanese original because I was that kid.

Anyway, unnecessary backstory out of the way, here are some... let's call them Observations and Consequences of having read somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 chapters (and growing) of a manga primarily hinged on card games from a spectrum of sources ranging from boringly lawful to sketchy as fuck.

Surprise actual character that develops in typical shounen fashion being Jounouchi. My limited experiences with the 4Kids dub and only early manga had not painted him in a particularly good light. I don't know if episodes were being aired out of order or if I had just missed the ones that established that he was making shit up as he was going along, but Wow I liked him a lot more going through the manga than I ever did watching the (dubbed, heavily edited and censored and thrown into a slurry machine) anime. I'd managed to come out with the impression that he was just as reasonably experienced with the game as Yugi back in the day. Wild.

I'm now reading every single comic-style post on Tumblr backwards.

Striking inverse to first point, wow, I don't like Seto Kaiba. Though he gets points for his general philosophy of the future, and the line I read in my sketchy online combo of scans and scanlations in which he said, "If God is in your way, you run him down," was Metal As Fuck. I somewhat shame-facedly admit to enjoying him a lot more as an Abridged Series character. (I watched Abridged as it came out back in the day! The experience of watching the anime with my brother had been so fresh that I got all the in jokes about the way things were edited and dubbed, it was great. Series remains influential part of my life to this day, which is hella weird.)

I almost understand how Duel Monsters works now. I don't want this.

That said, wow a lot of the decisions made in the anime made everything a lot more ridiculous than the admittedly already ridiculous original. I got the distinct feeling in the manga that the Duelist Kingdom stuff we were seeing was designed to be used and exploited in ways that don't make sense in an actual cardgame just played on a table like a normal person and this was part of testing everyone to think higher, differently. Maybe this is obvious to everyone already, I don't know. I had always liked that it was very, 'Not so fast, I'm going to blow up the moon to change the tides,' but I'm not really sure the anime gave enough explanation that this was an extra layer added to things for that event? You can see people actively getting used to it in the books, and people who aren't considering the real or 3D nature of it getting owned, but my memory of anime version is everyone just like, 'oh, shucks, fuck me, I forgot to consider the phase of the moon before i played this card, can't believe I forgot.' No one calls Yugi on any of this stuff because it's valid play in that situation. Plus Yami Yugi had mad trickster energy in the beginning and it suited him to think of ways to do things inside these little simulation boxes the way it suited him to set perverts on fire. I imagine the real card game trying to emulate this element as something that would be to its detriment, but I neither know nor particular care haha

Ryou Bakura.

Really, though. I think he became kind of casualty of 'wow, we have a lot of characters who really aren't able to do anything in this story anymore,' despite the fact that his whole inner life could have been as interesting as Yugi's. I always like thinking about the possibilities of stories in which main character falls into magical world and is given magical item and told they're the hero and then they find out they've been the bad guy the whole time. The first several volumes of manga were about the quiet weirdo kid that no one talked to who was always blacking out and turning into a fucked up version of himsef because he was so attached to his ancient Egyptian jewelry, so like, Bakura could have much the same shit going on. I want to know what's happening with him so much. He clearly doesn't love being possessed, but he's also so drawn to the ring. Despite it having stabbed him at least twice and him knowing it's a danger to him and his friends, he keeps being pulled back into it. You see so much more of him being like, 'Oooh, a creepy thing, I love that! :D' in the manga than ever in the anime, which I'm all about. Also more blood. I'm very about that as well. Though my memory of the anime also made it look very much like normal regular daily Bakura was just a weird facade in places before he ever would have been. I think that was it trying to compensate for what people didn't see from the Toei anime, but okay whatever, that I love everything about this guy is not news, I don't need to talk about Bakura excessively here, I'm pretty sure that's gonna show up on my blog by itself

On a related note though, damn, more of these people need to talk to each other. Can we have some existential crisis support clubs or something. Can we get like some apologies or something? "I respect you as a duelist." "Cool, but you literally built a tower designed to specifically assassinate me and my friends? You were supposed to get Better after I retaliated by putting you in a coma, but you kinda didn't." "Why would the coma have made it better" "I just told you it didn't" ---- "Sorry I went along with the plan of your evil parasite stabbing you, misled you, and then also jumped in and took up some real estate in your head too." "I understand, I also have an evil thing inside me that does things while I'm blacked out." "...no, I was conscious for all of that." "Oh." "..." "..." "..." "Do you like Ouija Boards?" "sure okay" ETC. Like damn we are reading shounen manga because no one is talking extensively about their feelings here and I'm tapping my foot angrily.

Holy shit there are so many mythologies happening at once. The ancient family guarding the Egyptian Pharaoh has a surname that's a Mesopotamian goddess. None of the god cards make any Egyptian sense except Ra, and just like. Baaarrrrely. Somewhere either Evil Ring Bakura or Mar/lik makes a reference to cremation and spirits being taken to heaven with smoke which several things, but definitely not Ancient Egyptian. Marik/Malik meanwhile is clearly trying to head Arabic, along with Rishid, but then, hey, our sister is just Isis. Goddess McGoddess. Sometimes they're the same goddess! Her name could be Isis Isis or Ishtar Ishtar. Meanwhile, all the obviously 'occult because Christians think it is freaky' stuff. ~ancient egyptian pentagrams~~~This isn't a complaint, I guess so much as a 'Wow, I can kind of see the cultural spot the author was coming from and where he was aiming' kind of thing.

Wonder where things would have gone if the card games had not been latched onto the way they were.

Managed to forget how gross the pre-cardgames stuff was on the sexual harassment front. I'm glad there was a sort of explanation of everyone drifting away from being dick heads and that that decision was made. It got way more comfortable to read after no one was bringing Yugi p*rn on VHS.

Yugi looks better with a nose, glad we got that upgrade.

Interesting to watch the series style shift as it goes away from being horror to being over the top cardgames and friendship (with blood!). The first picture of Mokuba is fucking Jarring. Also noticed that the nicer a character is, the less their teeth are defined.

Glad manga did not go as completely off the fucking the rails about Marik's face. I never got as far as seeing him back in the day because college occurred, but I remember seeing pictures and stuff and being like, "what in the Fuck happened to that dude, I think the house style has collapsed in on itself"

Things the author Really Likes: motorcycles, belts, SHOES, holy shit the shoes. These are some of the most lovingly rendered sneakers I've ever seen. All the detail on his characters goes straight to their feet and then it's stretched upward until it forms stiff peaks. Gently fold in 3000 years of trauma and bake face down in a crumb coat of scattered mythology. Remove when you roll two zeros.

Where the fuck am I going to put the extremely large omnibus volumes of this comic I purchased in order to balance out how much I would be reading for free on the internet. I should have grasped that a three in one edition would be Thick and yet somehow I was still :O when it arrived. Have I strategically purchased volumes that contain my favorite parts, maybe, what's it to you will i eventually get the whole thing because incomplete book series gnaw on my soul? yes

Wish the transition from "I've murdered several people in delightfully karmic ways" to "all you need is friendship in your heart and cards in your hand" Yami Yugi/Pharaoh had been discussed more/transitioned better. Buddy, where did you get this approved for television high horse? Please go back to strangling people with yo-yos or at least tell me why you stopped.

I still can't tell anything that looks like a big robotic monster apart from any other big robotic monster. My dude, I can't tell cars apart, all these monsters look the same.

Yami Yugi fascinated me way more in highschool? Maybe because it was still super early and the anime was like 'we need to torture you about his origins WeEkLy. Now I'm just like 'wait hold on, can we go back to Bakura and Marik for a minute, there's some extreme unpacking to do here?' Those two are paying so much more in baggage fees here my guy wow

Violently uninterested in any of the spinoff media

[littlesystems]

A new fresh hell I’ve started to see pinging around tumblr is replacing “creating” or “consuming” content with “masturbates to.” So instead of saying “X person writes fic about [insert “problematic” content here]” it becomes “X person masturbates to [problematic content].” I wanted to specifically make a post about this because it’s something that’s spilling over from the anti/fanpol types, and people that I follow have started reblogging this stuff uncritically, which is not fantastic. 

WOW. There’s a LOT to unpack here!

So first off, let’s talk about how masturbation is chosen here to inspire disgust: mentioning masturbation in this way isn’t supposed to be a neutral added detail, like, oh, the sky is blue, there are birds and bees, and also masturbation is a thing that humans do. Phrasing things in this way is designed to trigger your disgust reaction. EWW!! Icky people on the internet masturbate! Someone call the police! As though masturbation isn’t a normal bodily function. It’s not about the [problematic content] that someone is accused of, this is about phrasing any criticism like that at all. You can dislike what someone else likes, and you can find it gross. But adding masturbation as an extra layer of disgustingness to an already taboo topic is not a neutral addition. 

Notice this. Notice when posts are manipulative like that. 

Next up: let’s move a step past that. Fandom, by and large, is mostly populated by women and trans folks of all genders. Masturbation is a normal thing for cis men to do, barely deserving of an eye roll; when women or trans people do it, it’s gross, disgusting, icky bad and wrong. Disgusting. 

Notice this rhetoric. 

This is misogyny. This is transphobia. I know that it’s really easy to get caught up in fandom discourse and say “it isn’t that deep,” but this shit is insidious. Notice when a double standard is upheld: if cis men do it’s fine, it anyone else does it it’s deserving of ridicule, deserving of scorn, deserving of disgust. This is radicalization rhetoric. 

Onto the next part: 

I can’t believe that I actually have to say this, but creating/consuming smutty content does not necessitate masturbation. 

As someone who reads and writes smut, and as someone who has read and viewed a lot of 18+ content in my life, I can say that it’s rare for me to be actively turned on by something that I read, or by art I see - so I find it absolutely mind-boggling that people seem to think there’s some kind of one-to-one cause and effect of reading smut (or looking at kinky art) = masturbation. Finding something interesting does not necessarily mean that someone finds it hot; finding something hot does not necessarily lead to actual, physical arousal; and being physically aroused does not necessarily lead to masturbation, either at the time of reading or thinking about it later. There’s nothing wrong with masturbating to fic or art, but it’s not something that everyone does, and it’s not something that people do every time they come across adult content. 

This really, really should be obvious. 

Saying “X person masturbates to [content]” is one HELL of a leap, and unless someone actually personally talks about their masturbation habits on their blog, then it’s an assumption that no one should be making. Seriously. It’s invasive, presumptuous, and deliberately demeaning, and it’s being used as a cudgel against women and trans people. 

The specific person that I saw this type of criticism about did deserve criticism, but it should have been criticism about her dumb posts, not people making assumptions about her masturbatory habits. Seriously. I shouldn’t have to say this. 

Anyway, I’m a pro at curating my dashboard and unfollowing people that post things that I don’t like, but I’ve seen enough of this that I wanted to at least point it out before going on an unfollowing spree. I think a lot of people were reblogging this stuff uncritically but perhaps unintentionally, so I wanted to at least point it out before getting my hackles fully up.

[degeneratekitten]

The reeducation of a King

!!!WARNING!!! Read the tags before continuing. If any of the tags upset you then you probably wont like it when it happens in the story.

This story was one of the first asks I got, I started it, but never finished, so here we go.

The woman in front of you looked incredibly tired. She had bags under her eyes, her skin was pale, and she looked like she was on the verge of a mental breakdown. Truthfully you had yet to even inform her that the King Lamia she had rescued off the street was classified more as a hunting type bitty. She’d been under the assumption, like many people who came to you with rescues, that all bitties could be kept like pets.

“So he’s gotten possessive of you, and he started trying to control your life?” You questioned making sure that you’d gotten her story straight.

“Yes!” She sighed, looking almost on the verge of tears. “I had to slip tranquilizers in his food so I could come here! He goes absolutely berserk if I leave his sight for even a moment, and he refuses to let me decide where we go!” She cried, soundly more and more like an abused spouse than a distraught pet owner. To be fair, this was an abusive relationship, one you would be more than willing to remedy. “He also always tries to tell me what kind of underwear I should wear and gets mad when I don't wear them!”

“That's very troubling.” You nodded, before inquiring about an important question. “How was it that he got so much control over you?”

The woman opened her mouth to answer only to snap her mouth shut again in a frown. She didn't seem to have an answer.

“I… I can't remember…” She mused, before continuing. “I guess I didn't realize it at first, but over time he just got worse and worse, and somehow he convinced me that it would all be ok if I did this, or that. He started getting threatening, baring his teeth whenever I even suggested doing something he didn't want. I was afraid he’d somehow escape his cage at night and kill me, so I just did what he wanted. I figured this was just a part of rescuing bitties. It wasn't until last week when he started to demand I stop seeing my mother that I realized how weird everything was. He’s a pet, not a boyfriend, and I won’t be controlled by a pet!” She stated, seeming to come to a firm resolution in her own mind.

You nodded at her. “I see, so I think I know how this all started. “ You smiled, giving the woman a look that seemed to calm her down.

“What?” She asked, fully invested in what you were going to say.

“You see, bitties are separated into two different types, ones that are pets, and others that are meant for more, violent situations. Lamia’s with venom are generally meant to be either guards, or exterminators. Your King is the former. His breed was designed to protect an owner, staying vigilant for all threats both physical and mental. Where this all went wrong is because your King was born and bred in the wild, where a lot of the original designs and personalities of bitties have changed.” The woman looked incredibly interested in what you were saying. Fully invested and curious, you loved customers like this.

“So his idea of protection involves being controlling?” She asked just waiting for you to elaborate.

“Yes and no. His ideas about protection are skewed more in favor of breeding. If he has a partner he has to hide them away so they can't get taken by another bitty or human. He has to provide everything for them then, food, shelter, warmth, stimulation, everything. The problem with a lot of bitties in recent generations is that their predisposition to be reliant on humans still applies even when they’re experiencing sexual urges. They expect and crave for their human owners to satisfy them sexually alongside everything else.” You watched as the woman's face twisted in disgust.

“Wait, so you’re saying that hes trying to fuck me?” She yelled, grossed out and shivered slightly. 

“In short, yes, he wants to fuck you.” You deadpanned watching as the woman hugged herself.

“That's so messed up!” She exclaimed, which made you chuckle.

“I agree, but magic is weird, and magical constructs with origins like bitties are even weirder. But anyways, there is a way to fix this. A way to uncross his wires so to say, and make him desire other bitties rather than you. Which in turn should ease a lot of the behavior towards you. After I do that he should be more receptive to my traditional training in learning how to act more in line with the original king lamia’s.” You finished, watching as relief seemed to wash over the woman.

“So what needs to be done to uncross those wires?” She asked, to which you chuckled. 

“Get him a mate.” You stated watching as the woman seemed to balk a little at how simple your answer was.

“Wait! It's that simple?! I could have done that myself.” She asked sitting up straight, shocked and a little giddy at the prospect. You laughed with her.

“Well, kind of, unfortunately if you get involved in the process and give him a new mate, he’d take it as a sign that he needs to fight the other bitty to mate with you. It’s better to let a third party do the introduction.”

“Oh… Well, if it gets him to stop wanting to fuck me I’m more than willing.” She smiled, seeming to realize that a huge weight was being lifted from her shoulder.

“So when can we start?” She added, looking at you with hope.

“Well first we have to pick out a new mate.”

-----

You’d gone over potential mates and your rates with the woman for the rest of the visit. You’d mentioned that a cherry would probably be best for the King, as they were incredibly meek and in need of the amount of attention that this particular King was ready to give, plus they weren't lamia so the chance of breeding while already small, was nearly impossible. The woman was excited over the idea, as she wanted a pet who was easier to cuddle with as opposed to her King who she had to keep far away from her sleeping arrangements. 

You’d made sure to explain fully to her why although she had the best of intentions, King’s were not traditionally pets, and she needed to treat him accordingly. She could keep him as part of her family and give him a better home off the streets, but she needed to be careful not to let him take charge of her life anymore as next time he probably would kill her. She ended up taking this to heart, nodding her head as you led her to the door. 

“I’ll make sure I read more on how I’m supposed to handle him.” She promised, leaving in her car. You’d set a date for that weekend to go and pick up the King, you needed a few days to get a suitable cherry and set up an area in which you could do everything that needed to be done.

---

Meeting the King in question, Moriarty, as he had aptly named himself, was an occasion that was sure to be violent. You had a thick jumpsuit on, with extra layers covering your arms and legs, combat boots your husband had bought you just for these situations, and heavy duty handling gloves on so he couldn’t bite you. You had some safety goggles on as well in case he tried to spit at you, and even your neck was covered by a long collar from your jumpsuit. You didn't take any chances with violent venomous lamia’s especially ones who had reason to believe that you were a threat. You’d nearly lost your brother that way when he’d insisted on trying to calm a venomous lamia without gear. He’d been in the hospital for two weeks and aptly served as yet another reminder that protection bitties were not to be taken lightly.

Your husband was dressed beside you in a similar getup, and he had insisted on taking at least one Squadron bitty with the two of you, said bitty was currently standing at military attention waiting for you to give him orders. He wore camo like most squadron bitties, with a black shirt, ripped off sleeves, a pair of smaller dog tags and miniature combat boots and a knife. He didn't have his ecto flesh summoned so his outfit was a little baggy. His dark green eyelights were focused on you, while his arms were situated behind his back.

You had planned to use magic if things got too bad, but it was always good to have a backup plan.

Squadrons were very similar to Edgies in terms of vocabulary and humor, the only real difference being that they were never overtly hostile to anyone outside of combat. They made dirty jokes all the time and cursed like sailors, but never called you cunt or assface unless they were set out to kill you.

“I’ll need you to stay outside until we give you a signal.” You said to the bitty, watching as he gave a toothsome grin and saluted you in response.

“Just gimmie da signal an I’ll rip em up ma'am.” He replied, forgoing his usual vulgar vocabulary in lieu of a more respectful tone. He gave you a nod as well to tell you not to worry about him and you turned towards your husband with a pleased expression.

“You said this is your best one so far? I’m impressed! He didn't even cuss at me!” You praised watching your husband's face light up.

“Yeah, he used to cuss more than the others but I straightened him out real quick, nothing a little friendly competition couldn't solve.”

Chuckling you turned your attention back towards the door again, and steeling yourself for the worst you knocked on the door. Hopefully she’d managed to tranquilize her king.

“Hello! We’re here today for Miss Shelby! We’re here to pick up the package like we discussed yesterday.

“*GASP* MOTHER! HOW DARE YOU! I TOLD YOU NOT TO GO OUTSIDE! YOU DISOBEYED ME!” You heard the loud, unmistakable shriek of the problematic bitty then a mumble in response before there was a loud crash and the shriek of a woman. Worried that maybe the King had gotten more violent, you tested the doorknob, relieved to find it unlocked.

“Hello, Miss Shelby! I’m coming in!” You shouted, before bursting into the home.

What you saw caused adrenaline to surge through you.

The king in question was wrapped tightly around Shelby’s arm, hood spread out,tail swishing agitated, and teeth bared. He was on the verge of attacking.

Looking at Shelby you could tell how nervous, how terrified she was as she stared at the King’s teeth. You noticed that a plate of noodles lay shattered on the floor.

“Oh thank god.” Shelby breathed out, relieved to see you.

“WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE! BARGING IN HERE! MOTHER TELL THEM TO LEAVE!” The king hissed, moving itself so he was partially wrapped around Shelby’s neck, he had placed himself right next to Shelby’s ear with his teeth still bared and from what you could tell, his fangs were already secreting venom. He was very ready to bite.

“M-m-m-mori! She’s a guest, I invited her over for dinner!” Shelby tried to explain, earning herself a shriek in the ear.

“I DIDN'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR THAT! WE AREN'T ACCEPTING COMPANY! TELL HER TO LEAVE!” Moriarty screeched, tail seeming to tighten around her neck.

Shelby moved to try and loosen the tail only to earn a menacing hiss from the king, your eyes widened a bit as you tried to think of the best course of action. 

Moving towards her would probably cause him to tighten his grip, talking could yield good results but with how agitated he was it would probably only buy you time before he bit her. Maybe if you challenged him he would take the bait, but you couldn't do that if you wanted him to respond to you in training.

Suddenly you were incredibly glad that your husband had insisted on bringing a squadron bitty. The king would probably never see it again, and it would leave you in a neutral position from which to train the king.

You clicked your tongue at the king, not making any sudden movement, he hissed at the sound, and seemed to be hyper focused on you, before its attention snapped to the door, as a bulked up squadron bitty stormed in.

“The fuck is this cunt ordering ya round for!?” The squadron bitty bellowed, he was still minimal size, but you yourself knew better than to underestimate him.

“WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS! LEAVE MY TERRITORY AT ONCE INSOLENT CRETIN!” The King hissed, attention snapping to the other bitty.

Shaking your head, you looked at the little squadron bitty and gave a firm order. “Nothing crazy.” You stated, watching as he frowned in displeasure.

“Fuckin fine. Yer not a lot a fun are ya.” He stated as he stepped forward, chest puffing out as he readied himself for a fight.

“FIGHT ME BITCH!” He screeched out simply at the king, using the most direct way in which to challenge the king.

Taking the bait immediately, the King slithered down in front of his owner, hood spread, and fangs dripping poison. You took a step back, and whispered at Shelby to slowly back away.

There wasn't much of a fight, the King lunged and ended up shot by a tranquilizer as the Squadron bitty jumped out of the way for your husband to get a clear shot of the King’s hood. 

You’d had these instant magic tranquilizers well before the pure bite incident, but they simply did not work on large bitties, they were meant for smaller bitties, and were tested extensively to work instantly said bitties. 

There was no need for an actual fight, and really the simplest solutions were generally the best. You nodded at the Squadron bitty, as he immediately made to restrain the King bitty and brought him over to you, where you put a special muzzle on its skull. After which the squadron dragged it by the tail to a pre-prepared cage.

Having completed your business, you turned towards Shelby, noticing how shocked she seemed. It wasn't uncommon, people tended to be shocked when the people, or “pets” in this instance, that had been tormenting them were taken down. You took the lead, grabbing a shock blanket that you had also, prepared ahead of time and wrapping it around her.

“Do you want me to call someone for you?” You asked, as you secretly examined her for any bites or cuts. Luckily the only injuries she had were bruises from where the king had squeezed her arm too tightly.

Shelby nodded dumbly at you, before grabbing her phone and scanning her finger to unlock it. “Could you… Call my mother… I was too scared to have her over before.” She said, then plopping down in a nearby seat.

You nodded at her. “I’ll wait with you until she gets here.” You said, before pressing the call button on the phone.

---

The very first step in rehabilitating the King wasn’t to immediately jump into training. It was a little different from that. You’d brought your client over after she’d calmed down in order for her to pick out one of the Cherries you’d set aside for the King. You’d set aside 5 of them, not that it really made much of a difference as they were all crying at the prospect of meeting someone new. Most bitties were identical, luckily there were” some notable differences between these cherries, mutations weren’t always bad.

The customer came in, and almost immediately grimaced at the crying Cherries. You’d warned her that they were high maintenance pets, but also assured her that with a King around a lot of the more intolerable aspects would almost certainly be enjoyed by the King.

She did however warm up to the Cherries after a little play time, and after finding out that one of the Cherries enjoyed eating literally ANYTHING, she picked that one in a heartbeat. She stated that she loved cooking new things and someone to enjoy new things with was something she struggled with.

After that she bonded for a short while, she left, she had wanted to hear the cherry say “mommy” before leaving but you insisted that that was a TERRIBLE idea.

After she left, you shoved a heat inducing gummy down a screaming Cherries throat and quite literally threw him into the pen with the King. If you heard hysterical pleas for help, and screams to “shut up slut.” You ignored them, that would sort itself out naturally.

---

You monitored the situation between the King and Cherry loosely. It went exactly as you expected it to. The King violently fucked the Cherry, while the Cherry simultaneously cried for more and pleaded for it to stop at the same time. 

By the end of the week long fuck fest there were no more pleas for stopping, only begging for more. Until finally, the King had firmly marked the Cherry as its own, and was holding it close and whispering as sweet of compliments as it could muster. The Cherry was crying, as usual, but at the offer of food it had accepted the King as its mate. 

You waited another week, allowing the King to thoroughly fuss over the Cherry and fuck away its excess of aggression, before entering the pen. You entered with food, eyeing the King to make sure he didn't pounce. He has significantly calmed down, instead of hissing and threatening he stared at you warily while he held his wide eyed mate close. You set the food down, and nodded.

“I see you enjoy the mate I’ve prepared for you.” You stated, watching as the King’s head tilted to the side as he questioned the implications of that statement.

You left before he could question you. Letting the tranquilizers in the food take effect before you went to collect your newest project.

---

The King awoke in a cage alone while a hysterical Cherry cried as it reached out to him from a cage opposite of him.

You didn't have gloves on as you opened the cage of the Cherry, and you would never admit to smiling at the reaction of the King as you roughly handled the Cherry.

“RELEASSSSSSE MY MATE AT ONCE INSSSSSOLENT HUMAN!” He hissed, utterly incensed at the handling of his new mate. You shook your head, and placed the Cherry on a table, he cowered into your hand, hiding his face as he reached for his mate, but at the same time he still recognized you as a human to trust, you’d bottle fed him after all.

“Ppp-please I want to be with Mori.” He pleaded with you hugging your thumb as his tears colored the edge of his sockets.

You replied softly. “I know, but we have to correct some of his behavior first.” You replied as you shook him off.

He landed on his behind, more tears welling up in his eyes. Before you grabbed a shock collar, and placed it around the neck of the Cherry.

“What’s this’ moAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!” You wasted absolutely no time in shocking the Cherry, watching as its tears pooled on the table, and pissed soaked down its bare legs. The king had thoroughly destroyed any clothing that had been on the Cherry in its vigor. You could make out the small cuts on its form, the first few days had been incredibly rough in terms of sex, not enough to kill the Cherry, but certainly enough that you wondered why it wasnt terrified of the King.

The Cherry flopped on the table, while you looked at the King who’s hood was spread as he hissed, spit and thrashed about in his cage. It was bolted down so there was no way for him to tip it, but it was still quite the sight.

Nodding in satisfaction you placed the sobbing Cherry back in his cage across from the King, where he reached out desperately towards the Cherry intent on comfort, even if that wasn’t his strong suit.

“RELEASSSSE ME AT ONCCCCE! I MUSST COMFORT MY MATE!” He screeched at the same time trying to thrash his tail to strike out at you.

“No comfort will come to your Cherry until we have fixed your behaviors.” You hummed, as you pulled on thick arm coverings and gloves. You approached the King’s cage and unlatched it, grasping around the King’s throat as he attempted to bite your outstretched hand through the gloves. A calculated move in order to direct him as you pleased. 

You wrestled with the King for a while, rolling your eyes and smashing him against the table as he refused to loosen his bite. The King went limp for just a moment while you strapped him to the table with special restraints. His skull wasn't even cracked as you’d gone easy on him, it also helped that his breed was tougher than the pet variety. 

Being strapped down by his neck made the king easier to handle, even when he snapped out of his daze and began to thrash again, this time though without the threat of fangs. It was easy for you to pin down his tail and arms down long enough to strap them to the table. 

This was all just a show of force, to prove that she could do whatever she wanted to his mate, and he could do nothing about it. She needed him as violent as possible in response to threats to his mate, she needed him to stall in relation to his street taught values, if only so she could delete them.

You finished strapping him to the table, and picked up the remote to your mini shock collar, pausing for a moment and wondering if you should maybe start with pulling teeth first. However you needed a far more compliant King than you had currently, and it helped that the Cherry’s cries were beginning to grate on your nerves.

Looking over at the Cherry you sighed, it was still crying, smelly and pitiful as it cowered in the corner furthest from you and the King, too petrified of the violence to move. You waved the button in front of the king who hissed at the sight.

“DO NOT HARM MY MATE YOU WORTHLESSSSSS HUMAN!” He screeched, as you shook your head and pressed the button. As expected the sight of his mate in pain sent him into a frenzy, he spit, while you mocked him for his inability to do anything. You approached the cage of the Cherry intent on subduing the King in the most effective way possible.

“NOOOOOOO!” The King continued to screech. While the Cherry recovered from the shock cowered and begged for you not to hurt him. Of course, that wouldn't happen.

You carefully took the soiled Cherry out of his cage once more, and placed him next to the King, the King seemed to calm as the Cherry strained for its mate. You let them reunite for a moment, if only to grab a bitty sized dental gag and pry the King's mouth open. Once successful, despite the Cherry’s begging. You once more picked up the Cherry, and placed his hand into the King’s mouth, before carefully pricking him with the King’s fangs. 

The unholy screech of the King was nothing like the ones before. His venom was incredibly effective, and on a creature as small as the Cherry its effect was seen immediately. 

Pale faced and beginning to flush redder than normal, the Cherries tears became more frantic. He blubbered the same as normal as he tried to free himself from your grasp. Plopping him next to the King you pressed the button of the shock collar again and held. Looking the King straight in the eyes as it began to cry red tears. There was no understanding past the dental gag. But you knew well enough what was going on. A sinister smile graced your lips as you turned away from the king, taking the Cherry with you as you left the room. As far as the King knew, his mate was dead, dead by its own hand.

---

You returned shortly, having cured the Cherry from the King’s venom and stalled it in order to erase its memory of the training. Standard practice for once a bitty had been fully trained, the training would remain while the memory did not, no risk of blabbing to customers who really had no idea what was happening. It was necessary as while you trained the King the Cherry would bond with its new mother.

The King was still sobbing as you returned, and you used the lack of struggle to your advantage.

“It's a shame he had to die because of you.” You egged on, watching as the King seemed to deflate even further. You took that moment to put on your gloves and remove the restraints. The King didn't attack, and your smile was as venomous as the King as you removed the dental gag.

“WHY?” The King asked, and you couldn't help but chuckle, as you started to stroke its head soothingly, as you spit out harsh words. “That's because you are a bad bitty. A horrible protector.” The king flinched at that but immediately you turned it around. “But still so brave, and handsome.” Of course, the contrary information stilled the King, stalling him, and allowing you to reach for his AI, and stroke it. His eyelights buzzed a little, as you wiped away his need to monopolize his mate, his “charges.” There was of course more work to be done, but he would be too grief stricken to struggle. Just the way you needed him. You supposed it was about time to pull out some teeth.

---

By the time your bitty behavioral therapy was done, the King was a model example of a protection bitty. He was still a horribly bossy creature, but he no longer insisted on isolating his charges or displayed sexual desires outside of for his mate. He focused entirely on “protecting” and only grew violent when there was sufficient threat.

Meanwhile, the Cherry had not stopped crying for his mate until he met his new mother. He was of course still sad, but as most pet variety bitties are ought to do, the introduction of a new mommy or daddy tends to cheer them up instantly. Which was good, as the Chery, newly dubbed Sebastian, had sufficient time to bond with his new mother without the interference of a mate. The client learned easily to care for a Cherry, while also undergoing coaching from the rancher in order to be an effective King owner. 

On the day that the King was to return to his owners care. The owner had been nervous, she had lost confidence in owning bitties, and while Sebastian had helped, it still did not erase the nervousness she felt even after 2 months.

“I’m not sure about taking him back.” She stated, holding the Cherry close to her heart, he was as usual, teary eyed, but at the words of his owner, he burst into hysterics.

“Nooo!!! Mommy please I want Mori back! Please let me see Mori!” He begged, rubbing his snot covered face into her shirt. The owner seemed to deflate at this, and sighed, rubbing her Cherries back in reassurance. While you marveled at the fact that he was still suffering from some sort of stockholm syndrome.

“We’ll just have to see for now.” She said, and looked at you for reassurance. 

“You really don't have to worry.” You replied, voice chipper. “He’s nothing like he was before, you’ll be safer with him now than you would be without. He’s a model King, the perfect guard for any home.” You made your way towards the back noting the wariness of your client, but you stood by what you said, Moriarty was a model King, with all the coaching you’d given Shelby there was no reason to worry anymore.

Making your way into the back you spotted Moriarty in his enclosure, he was sunning himself as you approached. There was no sign of pulled teeth, skinned tails, or broken bones anywhere on him, and he only flinched slightly at the sound of your voice.

“Your mothers ready to see you now.” You sang watching the King light up and practically shoot to your outstretched arm. He curled himself around your arm, vibrating with anticipation at the prospect of seeing his mother again. You hummed in satisfaction as you made your way back to where Shelby was waiting.

The Cherry fell to the floor as he threw himself out of his mothers arms, he fell with a thwack, chanting Mori as he ran to you. The King very nearly pounced at the Cherry, he had tears in his eyes and seemed shocked and elated to see his mate. Although the Cherry's supposed ‘death’ had been erased from his mind he still had thought his mate dead, thus the tears. Before he could rush to his mate you held your hand up. “Stop.” You commanded, preventing the King who was practically vibrating from going to his mate. He was restless and voiced his immense displeasure. “YOU MUST LET ME GO SEE IF MY MATE IS HARMED!” He practically screeched into your ear, but still stayed still, causing Shelby’s eyes to widen in shock. She would have never imagined that the previously unruly and violent King would become so obedient, even if he was still incredibly bossy.

The Cherry at your feet practically hugged your leg as he cried and pleaded for his mate to come to him, you stopped walking forward before your punted him across the room, and smiled warmly at Shelby even as Moriarty squirmed on your shoulders as he looked between his mate and his mother, frustration growing as he stayed put, as you were gesturing for him to.

The cries of the Cherry became background noise as you spoke to Shelby. “As you can see, he’s fully trained now. All you need to do is handle him like I taught you and he’ll respond appropriately.”

“YOU MUST LET ME DOWN NOW!” The king snapped, as he crossed his arms, still waiting for permission. Nothing could change his bossy tone, but he still could be trained to behave.

Your customer sputtered for a bit, before she seemed to snap out of it. “Oh… Um… Yes… Come here.” She said, and gestured with her hands as you’d taught her for her previously unruly King to come.

The response was instant, he practically lept from your arm, disregarding the Cherry, albeit patting him on the head as he passed, and basically leapt into the outstretched hand that his ‘mother’ had out for him. He practically purred at the contact with his ‘mother’, nuzzling her arm affectionately as he hugged her arm, shocking her while at the same time earning a smile.

“I AM VERY CROSS WITH YOU MOTHER! YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MUCH I MISSED YOU!” The King stated, holding on firmly to his mothers arms as he stared longingly at the crying Cherry that was running and trying to climb up his mothers leg.

“I can see that.” She answered, smile wide and tears coloring the side of her eyes.

“NOW I MUST INSIST THAT WE COMFORT MY MATE!” He screeched, looking down at Sebastian with longing. Which in turn caused his owner to laugh and reach down to pick up the crying Cherry.

“There we go, the whole family’s together, Sebastian, Moriarty and mommy!” She cried, sniffling as Moriarty kissed the forehead of his crying mate.

“Thank you so much!” She cried, as she walked over to you and shook your hand. “I can’t believe how much he’s changed! Thank you! I can’t thank you enough!” 

Grinning ear to ear, you replied. “Really, it was my pleasure.”

[fakeloveaskblog]

I think you. should ask Janus to "slither" over to your house! But also give him options! Like, "would you like to join me for dinner at my house? Or do you prefer to just go on a walk? How about we go to a fancy restaurant~ My treat~. Or maybe just enjoy each other's company at a park? You don't have to of course!"

(Words: 2095)

Logan: "Ah yes wonderful tactics stranger! This will surely be useless in my upcoming attempt!"

It was nearing the end of the day. Janus was closing up. Meanwhile Logan was trying to calm his nerves by reminding himself that he was objectivly very cool. He had on one of his best sweaters to look extra good (it had the tardis on it!).

"Alright. Looks like we can go home and have an existential crisis about the passage of time" Janus said motioning towards the exit.

Logan took a deep breathe before grabbing onto the sleeve of his crush' shirt "Please wait just a moment. How long have we known each other?"

"I guess since I started working here...so around 6 months? Please don't tell me you’re quitting! Work would just become soooo much more enjoyable"

"I was actually wondering if you mayhaps would like to accompany me on a so called 'hang out' during our leisure time...Today...Or some other day! If you want to! You don't have t-"

"No! No I would hate to!- Love! I mean I would love to!" Janus couldn't stop himself from grinning.

Logan flapped his hands in happiness "Good! So would you maybe like to go to the park nearby or-"

"No! Yes! Yes!"

"Great!"

Logan walked out of the library and held the door open for Janus. After quickly locking they walked towards the park. It was a simple small one. Just some trees, lots of grass, lots of people smoking grass, a pond, angry ducks, even angrier swans and exactly 1 ice cream shop.

All Logan wanted to do was take his crush' hand. It would be hard to do even if he tried to because Janus was constantly fiddling with his gloves. He was barely even looking at where he was walking.

"....I'm sorry for the weird way I talk sometimes" Janus quietly confessed "With the backwards talk. I kind of lie when I get nervous? I think?"

"Oh I know" Logan replied.

"You kNOw?" Janus' voice went up a tone.

"It is very noticeable but it is also quite charming if I may say so myself" It took a moment before he carefully added "Besides I have read that compulsive lying and also vitiligo can come from great stress or bad...events so even if I did not find it charming I wouldn't hold it against you either"

A small smile played on the edges of Janus' lips "Thanks"

"No need"

He took an impressively deep breathe before he stopped in the middle of the road and dramatically grabbed onto both of Logan's shoulders to stop him. He stood on his toes to make himself taller and stared into his love's eyes.

"I do not think you are also charming at all!!!" Janus very loudly announced.

Logan let up into a chuckle. He forced himself to keep eye contact "Well thank you"

Janus let go of him and kept walking very very quickly to try and distract from his red cheeks and heavy breathing. That was flirting right??? He had flirted??? He had done it??? He'd flirted??? The little voice in his head that he was starting to think was his self confidence trying to break through to him would be so proud!!!

“So would you perhaps like an ice cream in these trying times?” Logan asked. He was walking with his hands clasped behind his back.

“Oh right I would definitely love something high calorie that would just make me even more gross”

“Somehow your thick layer of sarcasm was the part of that sentence with the least falsehood in it. We can share one? Or if you get uncomfortable eating desserts in front of other people we don’t have-”

“SNAKE!” Janus interrupted him. 

He ran out into the grass of the park and hunched down to gently pick up a slippery snake. It was small enough to keep in one hand. He was repeatedly hitting his other arm against his leg and putting his fingers in uncomfortable positions.

Logan happily sat down next to him. Janus ungraciously shoved the snake right up near his face.

“It’s a baby northern watersnake! It’s not venomous I promise. It hunts fishes in the water. Isn’t that cool? It’s also one of the few species that doesn’t lay eggs! It can even put out musk to protect itself!! It’s so-”

He realized how much he was ranting and immediately forced himself to stop. He stopped his arm as well. He was so annoying.

“I apologize. Sometimes I just run my mouth and I do these stupid motions”

Logan boped his nose “The only stupid thing about that is you assuming I wouldn’t want to hear you rant. Or see you....stim...? I literally flapped my hands 5 minutes ago. I do not judge”

Janus shrugged at the stim question “My mother did always say that my father has adhd but that was in an insulting way. When I have done research on adhd I relate to a lot of it but it’s not like I have a diagnosis or anything”

“Bitchass mother” Logan mumbled under his breathe “I do not have diagnosed autism either but I do still now I have it.....Besides....Not to brag but I have both a deegre in both psychology and medicine so I can basically diagnose myself anyway”

Jan was already too overwhlemed to ask how the hell he had had the time for 2 bachelors deegre only to end up at a library.

“Anyhow we don’t have to talk about psychology...now...............maybe one day though” Logan did a little robotic evil laugh “For now maybe you can infodump about that snake, then we can get a shared ice cream and then I can infodump about glorious star trek. How’s that for a plan?”

His crush took a deep breathe before nodding. He stood up and cupped the snake in his hands. “You want to go to the pond don’t you little guy? Want to hunt and murder a few fishes don’t you?”

He turned to Logan and shuly said a few more facts while they went to the pond. He patted the snake on it’s head before carefully setting it down among the plants at the water’s edge.

The friends sat in silence for a few minutes, watching the snake as it looked for prey. (Though Logan spent most of the time adoring Janus’).

When the snake caught a small fish and swallowed it whole Janus broke out in happy flaps. He let out a happy squeal while pointing at it. Logan nodded back at him. He mimicked his flapping. 

He’d never seen Janus’ smile that brightly. Logan took his hand. Intertwining their fingers. They stimmed together until Lo pulled in his hand making his crush stumble into him. 

Jan sat with his head leaned against his chest. He looked up at Logan with blushing red cheeks. He forced himself to move back even if he didn’t want to.

“Sorry”

“No need” The nerd assured.

He stood up and held out his hand to help Janus up. They didn’t let go of each other’s hands as they walked towards the ice cream shop.

“To piss off homophobes” Janus lied up the explanation while motioning for their hand holding.

“Of course”

They ordered a scoop of lemon ice cream and sat down by the tables outside. Janus had taken off his gloves.  Their hands laid on top of each other. 

“Do you also have that experience where” Logan stopped to take a bite of ice cream “You categorize your life into what you were hyperfixated on at the time? For example I remember that when I met Patty I was into Doctor Who and right before then I was enjoying Sherlock Holmes”

Janus shrugged. He didn’t want to say that he had a hard time even remembering most of his life clearly “I can see the Doctor influence” He nodded towards his tardis sweater.

Logan’s eyes lit up “Oh have you seen it??? The ninth and fifth doctors are my favorite! Though as a bi man I can not ignore David Tennants’ everything”

“I have seen exactly 0″ 

“Well that is not a problem that can not be fixed! When I met Patty she hadn’t either- maybe because we were 12- but I show-”

Janus choked on his ice cream “12? Oh wow. For some reason I had assumed you were older”

“Oh no. She moved towns and started in my class. It was almost love at first sight. I stole flowers from my neighbor and invited her to see the movie everyone in town was talking about....Kung fu panda”

He broke out into a laugh.

“Don’t laugh at me Janny! It was an incredibly tactical decision. You see I knew she liked animals and the kung fu panda is a panda”

Janus doubled over the table while continuing to laugh “Me throwing popcorn at myself during my first hangout almost seems cool in conparison”

“Popcorn is usually hot. Not cooled down” Logan corrected. “Though to be honest the start of our relationship was sort of what you can call a ‘mess’ since as you already know both of us were foolish enough to think Patty was a guy. So suddenly I had to come to terms with liking guys. Until she told me she was a girl. So then I was straight. Until I met Thomas but that is a whole different story. It was like some people say a rollercoaster”

“Am I rude for finding that funny?”

“Yes incredibly and frankly you should be dragged to the guillotines right now”

Janus leaned closer to him with a sly smile on his face “Aw ~darling~ I didn’t know you could be sassy”

Logan did his best to hide how the nearly choked on his own spit “Yes I can indeed be if I want to. Just like how I have been able to have adequate facial expressions and voice tones and also eye contact during our whole hangout. Normally I only have a lot of expressions and tones if I am talking about hyperfixations or my wife”

“You don’t have to do that around me”

“Really? It does take a lot of energy to try and appear ‘normal’ but I was afraid of coming across as rude”

“Darling I find you lovely either way” Janus was going to pour up the biggest glass of fucking wine when he got home. He was a flirting machine!

“Oh okay” Logan relaxed his shoulders and started looking at a point right next to his shoulder instead of at his eyes. “Want to hear about Star trek the next generation? It’s the one with Data in it”

Janus squeezed his hand “I definitely have a very good idea about who that person is. Yes please tell me”

Logan went on a very very long infodump which Janus happily listened to (and did his best to reply to even though he didn’t know much). He was sure he would never get tired of hearing him talk. The ice cream nearly melted because they were both too busy with what he had to say.

“-And that is why the poetry actually have significance” Logan concluded after nearly half an hour.

“Well that sure sounds like an interesting series”

“I can show you it? Soon? I have it all on dvd”

“It’s a date- I uh I mean like planned thing not like romantic I mean-” Janus babbled out.

“I am aware of what you meant” He checked his watch “It is probably a good time for me to depart. It’s my turn on laundry today. I will get to categorize socks!”

“Wow. Sounds like a party”

Logan excitedly nodded. He stood up. Janus did as well. They looked down at their still connected hands. Jan was about to let go and simply leave but to his surprise Logan pulled him into a hug.

He leaned down and moved his arms around Janus’ waist. In return Jan quickly stood up on his toes and buried his head into his love’s shoulder. He breathed in his scent. Coffee and strawberry jam. He closed his eyes, taking in the moment.

“Janus, You are so special to me” Logan murmured while holding onto him as hard as he could.

“I- I love- I love being around you” He whispered back. Too afraid to say the truth.

Logan tried to memorise the way it felt to have him this close before letting go and taking a step back “Well I will see you tomorrow then”

“Can’t wait!”

[fatalism-and-villainy]

☕️ talk to me about your svsss thoughts?

Oh man, SVSSS. I will say it’s probably my least favourite of the MXTX canon, but it is extremely fun. Honestly, the aspect of it that had the biggest impact on me was all the parodic commentary on webnovel fandom and its forum dramas. Like that first Airplane chapter with the long comment thread on PIDW just had me cackling from the accuracy of it (especially the whole “if you don’t like it then WHY DON’T YOU WRITE YOUR OWN, let’s see if you could do it better” “I don’t need to be able to do it to know it sucks” exchange, like wow, you broke every argument in the comments down to its bare essentials). All the snarky (self-)deprecating commentary in the narration on tropes and genre expectations and the constructed nature of fiction were delightful. (Have I ever mentioned that I have a deep and abiding affection for MXTX as a personality? Because I really do.) 

I also love the fact that so much of it is a commentary on certain fandom attitudes - like Shen Yuan is very much the kind of entitled fan who harasses creators (the fact that Shang Qinghua has nightmares about Shen Yuan yelling at him about his writing is funny, but also uhhh... telling), but there’s also a lot of pushback against simplistic moral impulses on the part of fandom. The subplot about Shen Jiu’s backstory (which Shang Qinghua omitted because readers wanted him to be a straightforward villain) is VERY much a statement about how circumstances influence behaviour (and fandom’s reluctance to contend with that, imo). Same with how Shen Qingqiu’s perception of Luo Binghe is handled - he’s so fixated on the future of Luo Binghe’s character arc (although for understandable self-preservation reasons) that he doesn’t realize how much he’s altered Luo Binghe’s character by treating him better, and that character isn’t deterministic and set in stone. As I’ve mentioned, I love the fact that the effect of his presence on Luo Binghe is very much in the usual MXTX vein of “the presence of absence of attention and care make a drastic difference in someone’s character,” except in this case there’s an added layer of “and sometimes it will cause their gay awakening.”

Also, the whole setup in which this extremely straight hypermasculine genre would be better and deeper if it were gay? MASSIVE POWER MOVE. Especially with the presence of that girl in the aforementioned PIDW forum shyly being like “uhm I wrote some SQQ/LBH slash if anyone wants to read?” This book is truly a vindication for slash fangirls and villain lovers everywhere. 

I also loved both the leads. Shen Qingqiu is delightful as a nerdy, extremely online personality who unwittingly ends up as a curmudgeonly but beloved mentor to a bunch of teenagers. The way the disciples at Qing Jing Peak grow attached to him with him barely being aware of it was one of my favourite parts and I really wish there had been more focus on it! The scene with both Ning Yingying AND Ming Fan crying after he’s come back to life is extremely sweet. Luo Binghe is also very very good... putting on a tough and cool persona when he’s actually a massive emotional mess who’s desperate for affection and validation. (He’s SO eager to please during his disciple days. “Do you like my cooking? Do you? Do you??? Please let me do this for you every day pls pls pls.”) And he gets jerked around so much! You have to feel for him!  

That said, while I do love the two main characters, the central romance doesn’t really land for me. I really do like Luo Binghe’s adolescent crush on Shen Qingqiu, and him having his gay awakening through the first authority figure to ever be nice to him. And I also like the “omg so cool!!” response to Luo Binghe-the-character that Shen Yuan has that could totally be sublimated gay feelings (@coldwind-shiningstars raised the possibility that he had a crush on Luo Binghe while he was reading the book, which I could see). But the way they actually come together in-story.... there’s a lot of Shen Qingqiu capitulating to what Luo Binghe wants and appeasing him (including in the novel’s climax!) without much regard for what he himself wants and is comfortable with, and it’s uncomfy for me. You can convince him that he has worth and that you’re not going to abandon him while also setting boundaries with him, you know? 

And Shen Qingqiu’s internalized homophobia runs so deep that after awhile his freak-out responses stop being funny and just start being sad. Wei Wuxian’s closetedness in MDZS is at least expressed through him taking genuine joy in plausible deniability flirting with Lan Wangji. Shen Qingqiu on the other hand is just grossed out by Luo Binghe’s feelings for him so much of the time. The extras suggest that he is genuinely attracted to and attached to him, but is just suuuuper repressed, but that being the case, I just come away feeling as if he’s not remotely ready for a relationship at all until he’s worked himself out more. And I kind of want Luo Binghe to just try dating other people.... given the amount of women who were swooning over him, there’s got to be a bunch of potential boyfriends in this world for him as well. He could even have more than one at once (like, he was the protagonist of a harem novel! why’s he gotta become monogamous just because he’s gay now? XD)

So yeah, I loved the main characters but didn’t love the love story. And the setting and plot felt pretty empty for me - I had trouble getting attached to any of the characters or potential side pairings. The one exception to this is Shang Qinghua/Mobei-jun, which is delightful for its “scary demon falls for the first person to ever tell him off” feature, but wasn’t integrated into the story well enough for me to feel strong emotions about it - it’s relegated to extras, and that it feels at a thematic remove from the rest of the story. That is to say, obviously Shang Qinghua being gay and not being able to express that in his writing choices is thematically central to the story (which makes the relegated-to-extras backstory for him unfortunate), but the specifics of his relationship to Mobei-jun don’t feel to me to parallel or offer commentary on the central relationship. Though it’s entirely possible that I’ve missed something there and just haven’t read the right meta yet. 

So, overall - it has a lot of individual aspects that I really like, it’s very funny in a lot of places, and I really appreciate what it’s doing thematically and with its meta aspects, but as a whole, it’s not entirely satisfying to me. 

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Iron

You get sick during the premiere of your dad’s last Marvel movie and try to hide it from him. 

-

           You really tried to pretend you weren’t sick. Mostly because it was a free trip to New York for the last premiere of your dad’s last Marvel movie and you wanted to support him, but also because the last thing you wanted was to be sick in your uncle Scott’s house. You felt bad the moment you got on the plane. You had to excuse yourself halfway through, climb over your dad, and throw up in the bathroom and hope that nobody noticed. You had left your toothbrush in your suitcase, so all you had was your TSA-approved toothpaste to slather all over your teeth and hope it got rid of the smell and the taste.

           “You okay?” Your dad had asked as you crawled back into the seat. “You look sick.”

           “No, I’m fine,” you lied, opening your book. You’d never gotten plane sick before, ever, because you’d been on planes since your eardrums were developed enough. But your stomach was churning like an ice cream maker. You felt like you were going to die. Your head was spinning, you couldn’t stop sweating, and you just generally felt like shit.

           “Okay,” your dad replied as if he didn’t believe you. You kept reading your book and turned your podcast up for the rest of the hour-long flight. By the time you landed, it was time again. You blew past your dad, muttering something about meeting him at baggage claim, and went to the nearest bathroom. You brushed your teeth again, sighing, and shoved your toothpaste back in your carry-on.

           You got to Scott’s house a few minutes later, since you’d convinced your dad to pay extra to fly into JFK instead of La Guardia, and right away went to the guest room while your dad talked with Sebastian. You took a shower and changed, hoping that would make you feel better, but as soon as you walked into the dining room and smelled the food they had ordered, you felt sick again. You didn’t know what the fuck could be up – you were definitely not pregnant since your boyfriend had broken up with you two months ago, you always washed your hands, and were a generally clean person so you shouldn’t have gotten sick from someone. You were just sick. But you weren’t going to tell your dad and ruin the premiere that he was so excited for.

           “You know we don’t even have to get ready for a few hours, right?” Your dad asked with a raised eyebrow. You walked over to Scott and hugged him for the first time in forever.

           “Yeah, I just felt gross from the plane,” you shrugged in response. You tried to eat a normal amount of food, but Scott could tell that something was off. Your dad was just blissfully unaware, like always.

           “So why are you acting weird?” Scott asked when your dad finally went to take a shower. His voice was lowered, as if your dad could hear, even though he couldn’t.

           “Because I feel sick and I don’t want him to know because he’s excited,” you explained. Scott put his hand up to your forehead and frowned.

           “Yeah, you definitely have a fever. Why didn’t you just tell him?”

           “Because he’s so excited. And this is the last Marvel movie, and he’s been super sentimental about it, and he really wanted me to see it. And he said I can finally meet Paul Rudd.” Scott laughed.

           “You really do love Clueless.”

           “Exactly! Just play along with me.”

           “Fine. But if you think you need to throw up or something while we’re there, I’m not covering for you. Your dad scares me.” You laughed a little bit. “I have some ginger ale if you want it.”

           You accepted it and switched rooms with your dad when he came out, starting to put makeup on. At least under layers of makeup he couldn’t tell that your skin was clammy. You tried to put a little extra on to hide it even better, but at one point it just stopped. You put the dress you’d picked out on and walked outside to the living room, where your phone was charging, and you waited for the two of them to finish getting ready.

           “Are you sure you’re okay?” Scott asked you through his teeth as you walked toward the car Marvel had sent out for the three of you. “For real.”

           “Nope,” you replied. Before he could say anything else you climbed in next to your dad, ignoring Scott’s look of worry. You tried to make conversation with your dad, but it was getting harder to follow. Your mind was just getting slower. Despite it being spring outside, you felt like it was a hundred degrees. Thankfully your dress had some cutouts so it wasn’t too hot, but you were still feeling whatever your body was trying to tell you.

           “Come on,” your dad said as he tried to steer you, realizing that you were walking slowly. You and Scott followed him while he took pictures and did interviews. You knew the drill – stay back unless an interviewer pulled you in. A couple did, but you avoided any major outlets. You felt yourself start going down, fast, and turned to Scott.

           “Scott,” you said in a warning tone, pulling him away from where your dad was talking to E!. “I feel…”

           “Oh, God,” he said, seeing that you were swaying back and forth. He held his arms out to catch you and tried to get you inside, but they weren’t letting anyone inside. “Okay, I’m calling a car, we’re taking you to…”

           Everything went dark before you could say anything in response. You only realized you were in the back of a car when you felt it make a sudden stop. You must have just blacked out, because the next time you were aware of anything you were getting your pulse read by a machine on your finger. Scott was sitting next to you, one hand on his phone, the other hand holding your free hand as there was a wire running just above his fingers.

           “Your dad’s coming as soon as the movie’s over,” he said when he realized you were awake.

           “What even happened?”

           “You pulled me aside and passed out. I told him we had a surprise for him. His phone’s off now and he’ll be pissed when he gets here, but at least he’s not going to leave.”

           “Thanks.”

           “I’m doing it for him. You should’ve said something to him and we would’ve taken you somewhere this afternoon before you fucking passed out on me!”

           “I’m sorry!” He sighed.

           “I know. Just lay down and we’ll figure this out.”

           Your dad raised hell about three hours later when they said that he couldn’t see you because he wasn’t the one that brought you in. He somehow snuck around until he got to the pediatrics ward and found you sitting by the discharge area while Scott looked through your wallet for your insurance cards.

           “What happened?” He asked loudly, walking over to you. Scott turned from where he was talking to the billing desk.

           “She has severely low iron,” Scott said. “She’s been sick all day and I told her to tell you, but she begged me not to. And she’s my favorite, so…”

           “Oh, I hate both of you right now,” your dad said, looking over at your uncle.

           “I’m sorry,” you said to the both of them. They sighed, looking at each other, and then looking at you.

           “I’ll go get a rental car and we’ll drive up. I’m not sure you should be flying right now.” Your dad went to go to the phone charging station and cancelled the flight and set up a rental car, leaving you to apologize to your uncle fifty million times.

           It was the middle of the night, somewhere in the middle of nowhere, when you had to get your dad to stop the car so you could throw up on the side of the freeway. He looked at you, sighed, and continued on while telling you how stupid you were.

Taglist (if you’d like to be added, let me know!): @an-adventureland, @firstangeldragonranch, @ssebstann, @winterreader-nowwriter, @eviemarvel

[silentauroriamthereal]

So, I watched Happiest Season yesterday, and I have thoughts. A lot of thoughts. Spoilers abound and this is long, so I’ll put this under a cut. 

Happiest Season: a review

You have to ask yourself how “happy” a happy ending really is when you glance down at the time bar on the film and see that there’s less than fifteen minutes left and none of the story’s problems have been even remotely resolved.

Skip to the closing credits, and I hadn’t changed my mind. This is a “happy” ending where a great deal of the problems in the plot were left either completely unresolved, or whose happiness wasn’t earned – wasn’t properly fleshed out, developed, supported, or in fact, even happy.

What an incredibly toxic family the Caldwells are. Let’s start with them: there are three daughters. Sloan has apparently cemented her parents’ permanent disappointment by having left a promising legal career in favour of raising a family. Side tangent: are we really still having this discussion, in 2020? This binary choice between family OR career? Besides, Sloan evidently developed a different, and very lucrative career. I also strongly dislike the way the perception of her marriage ending is portrayed as a failure. Her awful parents both resent her having left the legal field, yet have refused to now see her as anything other than a parent, ignoring her new career choice and, it seems, literally anything else about her. Then we have Jane, who is overtly abused. Treated as lesser than anyone else in the family apart from technical support with malfunctioning printers, Jane is constantly criticized, chastised, literally told to not put herself in the centre of the family for a holiday photo. I was horrified and devastated by the wanton destruction of her painting at the end, too. I’m happy for her that her book got published and that she found success there, but I hate that this brutal, completely unnecessary destruction of her art happened and was totally overlooked.

I’m going to come back to Harper, because there’s a LOT to say there.

The way the parents, Tipper and Ted, treated Abby, was appalling from start to finish. Leaving aside the ENTIRE question of the secret girlfriend thing, if my family ever treated a friend or even distant acquaintance the way the Caldwells treated Abby, I would be furious with them. I used to frequently bring friends who were international students or just on their own for the holidays to my parents’ place for Thanksgiving dinner or Christmas festivities. These people were so, so, so incredibly rude to Abby, from ignoring her when she first arrived to giving her a terrible bedroom with a door that doesn’t lock, to walking in on her multiple times while she was changing or in bed – that level of complete disrespect infuriated me! Just allowing those awful kids to be in her private space without any sort of discipline, consequences, or apologies was unacceptable. The way they treated Abby after those same kids – which she was stuck with, without any sort of request to watch them – planted that necklace on her, was unacceptable. The utter lack of apology for having literally accused her of theft, for accusing her multiple times after that – WOW. Treating Abby as though she was the unexpected, extra guest at the restaurant that first night, and giving the ex-boyfriend the parents kept shoving on Harper the proper one was unacceptable.

Then there’s how Harper treated Abby. Let’s start with the restaurant: first of all, had my parents pulled that stunt on my friend/guest/secret girlfriend, I would have let them know then and there that it wasn’t okay. And then I would have, I don’t know, asked the staff to bring a proper chair, and if that turned out to be impossible, I would have insisted that she take mine instead, and sat on the little chair myself. Asking anyone to closet themselves is an act of violence, and watching that as a member of the LGBTQ2+ community was actively harmful to witness. Again, a lot of the crap that Harper subjected Abby to would have been awful no matter WHO Abby was: you don’t abandon your guest to hang out with old friends. If they’re ready to go home, then you go home with them. It’s basic hospitality. Considering that Abby was Harper’s partner, that’s a whole extra layer of harm. THEN add the ex-boyfriend, a horribly-treated ex-girlfriend, and toxic old friends to the mix, and you have something beyond appalling. Adding this stuff on top of not standing up for Abby to her family, not insisting that she be given somewhere proper to sleep during her time in her parents’ house, not insisting that she be treated with the most basic respect, not defending her during the whole jewellery theft situation, and even going along with the parents’ de-invitation to that dinner – that’s inexcusable. You don’t treat other people that way, much less your partner. Then add Harper calling Abby controlling, while simultaneously having the nerve to get angry about Abby spending time with Riley, which is possibly the only good thing that happened for Abby during that entire, awful trip – yeah. I was finished with Harper by that point.

Harper also actively participated in the way her sisters were constantly put down by their parents. The responsibility of being the privileged favourite is to use your status to bring others up. Harper doesn’t appear to have any sort of spine or courage whatsoever. It was only after she was forcibly outed by Sloan – and such was her privilege that the parents believed that it was a “malicious” lie rather than a “shocking” secret – that Harper even admitted the truth, and that was only after forcing Abby to watch her deny it yet it again. While I did love John (the gay best friend)’s entire speech about someone’s love not being the same thing as being ready to come out, there is nonetheless a ton of harm in forcing your partner watch that. It does affect them. It does disavow their identity at the same time, when they’re in a relationship with you. Her pattern of behaviour of throwing other people under the bus, like Riley, is very much intact.

I completely comprehend Harper’s fear of being rejected by her family. Apparently it was a well-founded fear, based on her awful, awful parents. That’s one of the reasons why the ending didn’t resonate for me at all: it wasn’t earned. Harper’s turn-around from being completely unwilling to have her parents know the truth to claiming that Abby was the only thing that mattered to her, came out of nowhere. It wasn’t a supported development. It happened too quickly. Similarly, the parents both going from being just about the worst parents on the planet to having a VERY sudden change of heart and behaviour, just happened unbelievably quickly. There was no questioning the entire history of their practises or what was wrong with them, no questioning how they’d treated any of their kids. The whole “consequence” for Ted was deciding, of his own accord, not to align himself with a politician who would force Harper to zip it – sorry, continue to zip it – about her identity. He shouldn’t have aligned himself with that woman in the first place. No one ever apologized to Abby about the way they treated her from start to finish, from patronizing her for being an orphan or the constant lack of respect shown her, to the false accusations of theft. Not a single part of it was atoned for at any point. Even Tipper being so disgusted with Abby’s ipad photography skills was disgusting. You just don’t talk to other human beings that way, and there was no resolution for me on any of this. There were also no consequences for Sloan’s horrific, SUPER-public outing of Harper, for Harper’s destruction of Jane’s painting, for the kids’ planting of the necklace on Abby, or for anyone’s horrendous treatment of Abby in general.

So yes: when you’re less than fifteen minutes out from the end of a supposed romantic comedy that was more upsetting to watch than entertaining or funny, and you’re actively rooting for the main character to walk away from her so-called partner and her toxic family, that’s not good. I’m not sold on the “romance” aspect, either. John (Dan Levy’s character) was the only good part of this movie, for me, and that’s overlooking his completely rude ignoring while on his phone at the beginning, or his negligent care of the animals he was supposed to be taking care of. (Gross, again – animals’ lives have value, too, and if my pet sitter killed my pet through negligence while I was away, I would be furious!) But his point about “sticking it to the patriarchy” in terms of Abby asking Ted for his permission/blessing to marry Harper was spot on. For all the hype about this being a progressive, lesbian, holiday rom-com, this film managed to perpetuate a lot of gross aspects of straight, white, misogynistic, heteronormative culture, like women being the property of their fathers and needing to obtain a male parent’s “permission” to marry another human being. The only person’s “permission” that was needed here was Harper’s, and then it’s not about permission – it’s about two adults making a consensual decision to commit themselves to each other. It’s great if you have the support of family – aka, BOTH parents, on BOTH sides – but that support is a bonus, not a prerequisite. Perpetuating the false dichotomy of family vs career for women only, is a harmful one to keep perpetuating. That question is never asked of men.

I was honestly kind of disgusted that Abby chose to stay with Harper by the end. I get it, but it definitely didn’t leave me with warm, romantic feelings. It left me with the deflated feeling I invariably experience whenever a woman makes the choice to be the bigger person and submit herself to a damaging situation or relationship. Mostly what I’m left with is anger that no one spoke up for Abby at any point, even John. That, and anger and sorrow over Jane’s painting. So yeah: it wasn’t as bad as bury your gays, but it also wasn’t really a happy ending for me, or super enjoyable to watch. Do better, Hollywood. Do a lot better.

[dazaisfavoritewife]

Bakusquad with a black s/o - Someone calls you a racial slur

This idea has been on my mind for SO LONG! You might be wondering, “Then author-Chan, why didn’t you write it before?” WELL BECAUSE IM LAZY- So, I hope you enjoy :) -btw I’m going to use female pronouns, so if you want a male version or part 2 let me know-

~~~~~~~~

Bakugo

He is so appreciative, like this dude could care less about what skin color you are, but he just thinks your skin is BEAUTIFUL! Like, YES!! Racist Karen’s? Mans gotcha back.

But this one time, a racist bitch, *cough* BETHANY *cough* she called you a racial slur (even if I am african American i’m not saying it) and you obviously had to mop the floor with a hoe!

“Y/N, stay the f*ck away from my man!” Bethany screamed at you, you just rolled your eyes and stared straight at her.

“I’m sorry? Who’s your man?”

“Bakugo! You know that you ni-“

Oops! Bethany accidentally fell on your foot.. Then your hand.. Then your knee... She got beat the fuck up. While you were beating the absolute hell out of Bethany, the bell rang, but you were too busy with Bethany to notice that everyone was heading to lunch.

You snatched her by her hair, and started beating the crap out of her, when everyone saw they were frozen just there like ‘O’ but, Bakugo was cheering you on.

“YEAH! BEAT HER ASS N/N!”

You still didn’t give a fuck and just smirked, until your home room teacher, Aizawa came into the hallway.

“L/N! Bakugo! Detention after school!”

Best believe you just looks at him like, ‘N what?’

Bakugo just shrugged, and aizawa told us to go to lunch.

“This isn’t over Bethany..”

Then you just dropped her, grabbed Bakugo, and skipped to lunch, him proudly walking with you while everyone just stared at you in disbelief at how you’re acting like nothing happened after you just beat the shit out of a hoe. Not sorry!

Kirishima

Like Bakugo, he thinks you’re beautiful! He also thinks you’re real manly, because there are so many people who don’t think you belong in ua because of your skin, but he just deals with them himself.

But one day, someone took it too far and three girls game up to you and their leader just started insulting you, and one of them said a racial slur, you weren’t having it.

“Oh look! It’s Y/N! I thought you would’ve given up on becoming a hero, I mean how could you be popular when you look like.. That?”

“Like what? A badass? A queen? Beautiful? At least I don’t have 55 layers makeup, I have a thing called natural beauty.”

“What beauty? All we see is a ni-“

Oh no! They all somehow ended up on the floor with a bloody nose! Oops! You accidentally made your boot and their head best friends..

“I’m sorry, I can’t *thump* hear you other the *thump* noise! *thump thump thump*”

Needless to say, you beat all their asses. And in an instant you’d beat anyone and everyone’s ass if they even dared say a racial slur.

So, while in the process of beating three bitches asses, all of class 1-A came out of home room because aizawa wanted them to come and get you because you’re their friend, and they saw you beating the fuck out of three girls at the same time, and they all just stared at you in awe, and shock, except for Iida. He was against it obviously. And Bakugo, Mina, and Kaminari were cheering you on.

“Yeah Y/N! Kick their ass!”

“You got this Y/N!”

“Yeah! Whatever reason you did this, great job!”

“L/N That is not appropriate in school or outsie of it! Please refrain from beating people up!

Aizawa heard cheering and yelling outside the classroom and got annoyed, and went to check to see you beating three girls asses and the Bakusquad, (this time all of them) cheering you on.

“Is there a good reason for this? Otherwise detention.”

“These *thump* bitches *thump* thought they could try *thump thump thump* call me a racial slur.” Iida shut the fuck up real quick, and everyone was shocked that he actually started routing for you!

“...Continue.”

Then he walked back in the classroom. We stan men who don’t support racist bitches.

Kaminari

Kaminari respects you, you don’t take anyone's shit. Plus you’re beautiful, that’s a bonus to him. There were two particular people once who were giving you weird looks because of your skin, you just laughed in their face while Kaminari electrocuted them, then brought him home after he short circuited.

But one stupid bitch didn’t know how badass you are. So they tried using a racial slur, but we all know we don’t stand them. So this bitch named Rachel walked up to you and just started trash talking.

“Why are you even in the hero course? You don’t deserve it.”

“Because I earned it. You don’t deserve to be in ua at all if you’re bullying someone superior to a lowlife.”

“Whatever, you’re just a ni-“

She didn’t get to finished her sentence before you just roundhouse kicked a bitch, then just started beating the crap out of her.

“Say it again. I DARE you.”

While you were beating the shit out of her, class 1-A and aizawa just heard a bunch of loud and some very quiet crashes and thumps, and a lot of yelling.

“What in the entire world is going on out there..” Aizawa mumbled.

All of class 1-A including aizawa opened the door and walked into the hallway, to see you literally slamming her face into a locker, and occasionally kicking and punching her.

“Holy shit..”

Everyone was stunned, but Bakugo was laughing his ass off.

“L/N, what are you doing!?”

“SHUT UP IIDA!”

“U-uhm L/N..? Why are you hurting that person..?”

“THEY TRIED, THEY REALLY TRIED ME!”

“What did they do?”

“SHE THIUGHT SHE COUKD SAY A RACIAL SLUR”

“YOU GO! THATS MY GIRL!”

“Oh, everyone back in the classroom. Everything’s fine.”

Then they just went back into class like their classmate wasn’t beating the shit out of a girl. Needless to say, someone had to pull you off of her before you killed her.

Sero

Sero is a supportive king, and very underated. He thinks you’re the most beautiful women he’s ever met, and mans is extremely protective because once someone made a comment about your skin and you just ignored it but it kinda hurted :(

But one fateful day for two boys, they made the terrible mistake of saying a racial slur, they really thought they did something by getting beat the fuck up.

“I don’t know why they let YOU in the hero course.”

“I don’t know what led YOU to believe I’mma take your shit.”

“Whatever. You’re just a ni-“

And he just magically fell to the floor! Oh no! His buddy accidentally got slammed into him after! Damn it, they accidentally made contact with your boot!!

Class 1-A and 1-B heard you beating the shit out of the boys, so the teachers went into the hallway to see what the commotion is, but the students being their nosy selves went to see too.

Mr. Aizawa and Mr. Vlad King went into the hallway to see you beating the fuck out of two kids, class 1-A and 1-B looked through the door, and Bakugo just started cheering you on, so did Sero.

“Yes Y/N! Fuck em up!”

“I knew I chose the right one! Yes Y/N!”

Kendo being one of your friends, started cheering you on too.

“Go Y/N! Yes queen!”

Aizawa just turned around and walked back into the classroom after telling the students to go back to their seats. Vlad king broke you away from them though.. Aw shit you got detention.

Mina

(I got lazy on Sero’s because after Kirishima I took a break and started writing Kaminari’s after, and it’s 1 AM so I’m tired and watching YouTube to stay awake, this is probable gonna be shitty, they all are honestly.. I’m sorry btw I believe the theory that Mina is black so roll with it if you don’t)

Mina knows that you’re the most beautiful wiman alive, and you’re her queen, and vise versa.

One day this bitch named Ashley decided to insult your guys’ relationship and called you a racial slur, you definitely weren’t having it when it comes to Mina.

“Hey Y/N I heard you’re dating a girl.. That’s gross.”

“Hey Ashley, I heard you eat d*ck. That’s gross.”

“You’re a nasty ni-“

Ashley couldn’t finish her sentence because she was slammed into the locker, and became best friends with your fist and boot, whoops!

So, everyone was heading home because the final bell rang and everyone was packing up, and they were leaving their classrooms, and they all saw you beating the shit out of Ashley, and Mina was just smiling the widest smile that shines so bright, and she started cheering you on with Bakugo.

“Yes my queen! Beat her ass!”

“Yeah Y/N! Beat that extra!”

You got one last HARD kick in, before aizawa came up to you and pulled you off.

“Let me go!”

“Why were you even harming a student?”

“BECAUSE THIS HOMOPHOBIC BITCH CAME UP TO ME AND STARTED TALKING ABOUT ME AND MINA AND ADDED IN JUST THE CHERRY ON TOP AND CALLED ME A RACIAL SLUR!”

Aizawa went quiet and so did everyone else, then he just let you go and walked away, and everyone else just left the school like it was a normal day, we stand most of the people here.

(In case you’re confused on why it said Raven I accidentally put my name for this kind of stuff,sorry)

[7nosecrinkle7]

Lena/ Reader "Of course I care" and "Why have you been hiding this from me?" with Lena saying these things

Thank you for your request, anon! I hope you enjoy it <3

———————————————————————-

How Long?

You could not look at another layout. They were starting to visually blur together. You worked in the art department at CatCo. Well... that was putting it modestly. You actually ran the art department at CatCo. You were just as well respected as the big names in the building, and people parted when you walked into a room. 

But today, in particular, you’d much rather disappear and be home. See, for about a week now, you’d been feeling run down. You passed it off as being an incredibly busy week last week. You laid on an extra layer of makeup to hide the bags and your slightly red nose. You were sucking on cough drops like they were candy and had a pharmacy’s worth of cold medicine drugs in you. And they all seemed to fail you today. It was only Monday, and you had no idea how you’d make it through.

Your phone buzzed, and you glanced down to see it was Lena. She needed a preview of the current layout. Usually, you’d take it up yourself, but you grabbed the newest intern and sent them on their way. Today was one of the days Lena was at CatCo. She split her time between L-Corp and CatCo, depending on which one needed her physically in the space that week. Most of the time, she was at L-Corp, but you were all on a tight deadline with a big issue coming out at the end of the week.

You weren’t avoiding Lena perse, but you had canceled yesterday’s date night due to ‘working late’ to meet this deadline. The congestion had properly set into your voice, and it was no longer easy to conceal how poorly you were feeling. It wasn’t a big deal, so you didn’t bring it up. You could pass off the sneezes at Saturday brunch as Spring starting to bloom, but you were past that now. The bags under your eyes, blurring of your consonants, sniffles, and red nose, and the tickle in your throat was too distinctive and identifiable. 

You sighed and flagged down the same bright-eyed intern you’d just sent up to the top floor. You sent them on another mission to get you a third cup of tea. You made your way to your office and sat down at your desk. You opened your tablet and scrolled through the new sets that just came in, your head resting in one hand. You were never more thankful than in this moment that your office walls, while still glass, were frosted through the middle hiding your misery.

While you were wallowing and wishing to be home in pajamas and blankets... Kara Danvers and Lena Luthor were a floor up, both of their arms crossed and their faces showing confusion.

“It still just doesn’t feel right,” Kara said. 

“I get that,” Lena said, “I know it can be better…” She trailed off. Lena knew you could do better on it. Something about the whole situation felt off for Lena. Ever since your date night was canceled last night, she felt that something wasn’t right. You had been dating for a few months now, not publicly yet, though, and you’d never canceled a date without an excellent reason to back it. Last night was different. And she knew you’d generally bring up an important layout personally so you could discuss it. Your texts, calls, and interactions the entire week had been unusually sparse.

“You know what, I’ll take it back and see if I can work something out with her,” Lena said, cutting the brief collaboration even shorter with Kara.

“Are you sure? I have some time to take it back if you have things to do.” Kara offered.

Lena shook her head, “I’ve got it, thank you, though.”

Back on your floor, you somehow missed the voices quieting down ever so slightly. You also missed hearing the distinctive click of stiletto heels on the flooring until someone was standing in your office doorway.

You looked up to see Lena standing there, the layouts from a half hour ago clutched in one hand. You sighed and waved her in.

“It’s ndot working, is it?” You asked, already knowing the answer. You internally cringed, hearing your own voice. 

You pushed back from your desk to walk around in front and lean against it. Lena handed the layouts back to you with a few notes attached that she and Kara had added. You pushed off and paced while going over the notes.

“Miss (Y/L/N), your tea.” The intern briefly interrupted. They entered your office and handed the steaming to-go mug to you. 

“Thank you,” you said with a smile, and they hurried out of the room. You sighed when they were gone and stopped pacing.

Lena took the layouts back from you and placed them on your desk. She then took the spot you had been in and leaned into your desk. She crossed her arms and quirked an eyebrow at you.

“How long?” is all she asked.

You rubbed your hand across your forehead. “Since last week.”

“Why have you been hiding this from me?” Lena asked with her arms still crossed, but a concerned look was growing on her face. You couldn’t help but feel a little silly and guilty even though you were the one not feeling well.

You shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“Love, it’s okay, you know you can talk to me.” Lena softened completely 

You sighed, “I guess it’s because you’re Lena Luthor, a very busy and important person who has bigger things to deal with than your girlfriend’s cold. I know it’s stupid, but I didn’t think you’d care.”

Lena softened entirely and stood up, pulling you into a hug. “Of course I care.”

You stepped forward and buried your face into her blouse despite knowing exactly how much it cost. You were just so exhausted and miserable that you couldn’t help the few tears that slipped past. 

“Let’s get out of here. My place or yours, love?” Lena asked, rubbing slow circles on your back.

You sniffled and shook your head, still not leaving her arms, “we’re swamped right now. I can’t take time off. The layout is still a mess...” 

“I can delegate that to Kara and your assistant. They’ll handle it, and if they can’t, they will still reach me if they absolutely need to.” Lena’s voice was calming and soothing. You found yourself relaxing more into the hug.

“Yours,” you whispered. 

Lena kissed the side of your head and pulled back. You pulled a tissue from the box on your desk and dabbed at your tears and your nose. You took a quick glance at the small mirror you kept in your desk drawer. Thankfully your makeup seemed to have held.

“I just need to grab my things, and then we can get out of here,” Lena said after you’d picked up your bag.

You held the back of your hand to the underside of your nose and sniffled. The few tears you’d let out seemed to have loosed a bit of your congestion and irritated your nose even more. You sniffled again and turned, stifling a near-silent sneeze. Huh! N--xxt.

“Bless you,” Lena said quietly.

You sniffled again, “thandks.” You shook your head, took a deep breath, and squared your shoulders. You walked briskly and led the way out of your office. It was what Lena called your CEO walk even though you weren’t one. It was the presence you projected when you walked through your department and through CatCo. It was your own form of armor that no one could see through.

You both stepped into the private elevator and rode the five seconds up to the next floor. The general bullpen was even more chaotic than usual, but just like on your floor, people parted as the two of you strode towards Lena’s office.

Soon enough, Lena had things worked out with Kara, and the two of you were back in the elevator. Knowing it was Lena’s private elevator and wouldn’t stop until you reached the ground floor, you walked to the back and leaned your head against the wall.

You closed your eyes and felt Lena rest her hand on your arm.

“Darling, do we need to stop at your place before we go to mine?” Lena asked at the volume of a whisper. 

You shook your head and sniffled. You wriggled your nose around and brought a knuckle up to rub at it. You tried to stave off the sneeze but were failing at it. You felt Lena’s eyes watching you, that protective hand still in place on your arm. 

A quick glance at the numbers showed you were on the second floor, the elevator seconds away from opening while you lost the struggle with your nose. You bent at the waist and stifled a harsh double. 

Hiiih hiih-n—xt… nxxgtt! 

Huhmmpf—shu! 

A third sneeze escaped as the doors opened. 

“Bless you, darling,” Lena said quietly, mindful of any listening ears.

“Thanks,” you sniffled a few times sharply and walked out, back to business appearance. 

Unsurprisingly, Lena’s driver was waiting for the two of you when you stepped out of CatCo.

The ride to Lena’s penthouse was uneventful. It was mid-morning, so traffic was light. It was quiet, Lena laying off the questioning while your sniffles filled the silence. You were far too drained to answer any of them regardless. There were no tissues in the car, which either you or Lena would definitely have to amend at some point.

………...

The moment you entered the penthouse, your stilettos came off, and you let your sinuses finally get some relief. You ducked your head into your elbow...

Huuh uh hiii hiiuushhheeww! Ushheew… hiih eshhheewwww!

“Bless you!” Lena said, a bit startled.

Hih achxshewW! 

You sneezed again and sniffled. That would help your nose a bit for now. 

“Bless you, love,” Lena said and guided you towards the kitchen. You lowered your elbow and brought a hand up to swipe at your nose. Lena grabbed you a few tissues from the counter.

You took the tissues and blew your nose as much as you could. 

“Gross, sorry,” you mumbled when you were finished. You threw out the used tissues and washed your hands.

“No need to be sorry (Y/N). You can’t exactly help it.”

Lena went about placing the purses in the coat closet and collecting your shoes. Meanwhile, you used the kitchen sink to wash the majority of your makeup off. You patted your face dry with a fresh dishtowel. You sighed deeply and placed your arms on the cold granite countertops and hung your head completely miserable. 

You sniffled and coughed; you were beyond stuffed up at that point. The congestion had fully set in. 

“Are you mad?” You asked quietly and picked your head up. Lena walked over to you, eyebrows quirked in confusion. “That I hid this from you?” You supplied for her.

Lena shook her head and sighed, “No, I’m not mad. But I do want to talk about it at some point.” She ran her fingers through your hair as you relaxed some more. You could handle that conversation later, just not now. Lena hummed as her hand came to rest on your forehead and then cheek.

“You feel warm… How about you go lay down, and I’ll bring the thermometer and some medicine?” Lena suggested. She leaned in and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. You blushed slightly and nodded before heading off to change and get comfortable.

When you curled up in her bed, you almost immediately drifted off to sleep. You knew when you awoke from your nap, Lena would be there with a warm mug of your favorite tea, some soup, medicine, and cuddles. Your Luthor may be icy on the outside at times, but she was a total softy. That was what you loved most about her.

[fromchaostocosmos]

I finally watched Netflix’s The Witcher and I have thoughts. 

I also watched Making the Witcher and Inside the Episodes The Witcher in hopes that it would clarify stuff, give more details, and give more background. Also to get insight from cast and crew and what their thoughts were in all of this.

It just added to my thoughts and didn’t really help me in the way I was looking for. Heads up spoilers. 

My Thoughts:

1. Maybe it is a me thing, maybe it an ace thing or maybe it the show just doing a bad job, I don’t know, but I’m supposed to buy that someone falls in love that quickly no just once, but twice. In Inside the Episodes the showrunner, Lauren Schmidt Hissrich, explicitly state that Geralt is love with Renfri to which I am like dude knew her for like 5 seconds. The same thing with Yennefer it is also stated flat out that he is in love with her even though he knew for 5 seconds, but at least there this is some ambiguity is the djinn’s magic at fault for that.

2. Speaking of Yennefer apparently I’m supposed to like according to the Hissrich. Because really had a very hard time with that and I still do not like her. Hissrich also describes Geralt and Yennefers’ first meeting as being at an orgy which is not what it read to me. It read to me as event that the participants were non-consensually participating in due to Yennefer’s magic. Based on the glazed over looks they have during the event and the shock and horror upon being awoken from their magic it didn’t really read as something they made the choice to participating in. 

Yennefer comes off to me as someone who is vain, spoiled, selfish, and power hungry, and spiteful which is fine to have a character like that, but then go with that and do that and don’t act like your character is some amazing wonderful person if when they are not. If your character has flaws then have them grow and learn don’t just say those flaws aren’t really there in the first place.

The djinn is a living being and I’m supposed to be cool with the fact she wants to murder them so she can have undo a choice she knowingly made, according to Hissrich she knew she was making the choice to give up being up to have children to become a sorceress. That is selfish to me, she made a choice and she knew what she doing and know because she is unhappy it is okay for her try to murder another to get what she wants.

No, thank you. I personally do not care for her nor do I find her likable in anyway. 

3. The ableism. I found that the show had fair amount of ableism especially surrounding Yennefer before her transformation and I while I understand that within in the story ableism exists it doesn’t mean that the narrative has to or should reward ableist attitudes, behaviors, ideas, and/or actions or should be seen to be in way signing off on them and yet that is exactly what the narrative seemed to be doing to me. 

Also since the kind ableism going on the show is not kind of ableism that affects me I would really like to listen to anyone who had has thoughts on it and who is effected by this kind of ableism. 

4. I’m very tired of fantasy “racism” = racism allegory it just doesn’t work. Fantasy races have magic or super strength or other powers or abilities that either can protect or/and semi-reasonable to be fearful off. That however, is not the case in real life, despite what racist stereotypes may want to believe. Black people are not more aggressive, Jewish people don’t actually control the world, etc. so to have allegorical races who could kill someone with magic and thus give reason for someone to fear them doesn’t work when there real life counterparts stereotype is not based in any reality. (I hope I’m making sense)

Also there something kind really gross when you got white actors playing some the fantasy races that are being marginalized and the groups that they are meant to be allegories for are not white and were marginalized and murdered by white people. It is also an extra layer of yucky when you got all that going on with the addition of scenes where humans being racist in the show are not white. 

5. I’m not black if you didn’t know already now you know. I’m not here to speak over anyone who is Black and if you are Black and you watched show please share your thoughts because I would like to know them and to listen to them. 

I personally felt kind uncomfortable with how black characters where often used in the show, it felt like they were used for white characters rather then being their own individuals who were with or on a journey with said white characters, if I am making sense.

I was also uncomfortable with the fact that all of druids has what I believe were dreadlocks, I apologize if I got the exact hairstyle wrong, but I’m pretty sure it was dreadlocks, even though not all of the actors were Black. Again hope I’m not speaking out of turn or stepping out of my lane here.

As I said I would really like to listen to what Black people have to say about this.  

6. The whole Yennefer wants to be a mom thing felt like it came out of nowhere to me. Like I just felt like I didn’t understand where that came from. It doesn’t necessarily mean the show did a bad job. It just means that is my thoughts and my thoughts were “where the fuck did that come from”

7. Maybe it is because I’m from Diasporic people who had been forced out their Homeland time and fucking time again, but the whole scene where Geralt tells the Elven king that he should give up trying to get their Homeland back, a Homeland that they were forced out of and learn to live with the people who committed a Genocide against them called the Great Cleansing yeah I my very Jewish self had some major reactions to that and it was not good. 

That whole thing is a privileged and white stance to take, but that is not really Geralt taking it. No, it is way deeper then that. That is all the white people who get to make the important decisions about the direction of the show. 

That is the stance of the Polish writer of the book series. 

8. The show is based on books by a Polish writer and I have feelings about that. I feel that is most certainly comes through in the attitudes and stances about stuff going on and the white people behind the scenes like the showrunner didn’t see the need to change or fix it. 

The showrunner goes on a lot in the Inside the Episodes about the powerful women in show and how that comes from books.

Okay that nice, but I have no use for powerful women if you are still going to give antiblackness, ableism, racism, modern colonialist ideas while decrying colonialism, essentially upholding assimilation, cultural appropriation, bad racism allegories, elevating pretty only white women, and oh yeah taking architectural ideas from various non-European places to give different areas a different feels so it doesn’t feel like everything is one set, one place but then bothering to really have anyone from those places in those sets. 

[its-bound-to-get-loud]

Ashton Irwin is not straight: a masterpost

It’s been a while since I’ve written a masterpost, but I’ve been meaning to get back into it for a while now. Giving a voice to some of my personal ideas is the main reason to start this blog in the first place. I’ve made a similar post about Michael several months ago. I can highly recommend checking that one out as well. This one will probably be a bit shorter than that one, since Michael has been banging on that closet door a ton, while Ashton is a little more subtle.

Before you continue reading, a quick disclaimer. If the idea that Ashton may not be straight makes you uncomfortable. Please do not continue reading. However, if you have an open mind and are willing to entertain other ideas than your own or if you share my ideas (based on the title) you are more than welcome to continue.

Finally, I’m asking you. Please, under no circumstance ever show my posts to any of the guys or people close to them. The posts that I make are meant for fandom discussion only. You can share them with friends, you can talk about them, just do not share them with the guys or the people around them. Also, I will not be publicly speculating about what label (sexuality) the guys may identify as. This is something very personal and it’s up to them to decide how they want to or don’t want to identify as. However, I do believe that at least Ashton, Luke and Michael are not straight. I haven’t completely made up my mind about Calum, but I think there are definitely certain signs that he may not be straight. I’m aware that a lot of people believe in Cashton as a couple. Personally at the moment I’m posting this I do not believe they are (or were) a couple. I understand why people think they are dating, I have seen plenty of Cashton evidence, but nothing has absolutely convinced me so far. They are super cute and I absolutely ship them though, I would love nothing more than to be wrong about this. Now that we have gotten all of that out of the way, let’s get to the reasons I think Ashton is not straight,

I do not have as many reasons for Ashton not being straight as I do for Michael, who has been incredibly vocal about not being straight. Ashton however has thrown a few hints out there and I am receiving them loud and clear. For me the first thing that pointed me towards Ashton not being straight sounds a bit vague. It was his demeanor, the way he acts, the way he carries himself. Ashton is very flamboyant in the way he acts. You know how you see someone you don’t know, but instantly know they’re not straight because of the way they behave? That’s exactly what I see when I look at Ashton. It’s hard to put into words, but if you don’t know what I mean I highly suggest googling the definition of flamboyant, I’d say it fits quite well with Ashton. Now I know this is very much a stereotype and not everyone who is flamboyant is gay* and vice versa, so this doesn’t make what I say a fact (unless Ashton comes out and says he’s not straight, this whole post is speculation). But those stereotypes do exist for a reason, they may not apply to everyone, but they do exist for some.

* I’m using gay as an umbrella term here, I don’t mean to imply he is only into guys. Simply that he is not straight.

“Girl and/or boy”

The following moment of the guys explaining what Don’t Stop is about can be interpreted in many ways. It starts with Luke saying the song is about a girl at a party, that everyone wants to take home to “hang out” with. Then after some further talk at 0:53 Ashton says “It’s just about a girl who everyone wants at a party basically. And/or boy”. Now this can be interpreted as a girl seeing a boy at a party who she likes. It could be a general statement that some boys aren’t (just) interested in girls, but (also) in boys and he’s trying to be inclusive. Which is not out of character for Ashton I’d say. It could also be a little more personal. Maybe meaning that he might not (just) be interested in girls. Personally I think it might be a combination, it’s a blanket statement that leaves plenty of room for plausible deniability, should there ever be a need for further explanation.

“I don’t wanna tug any of ya”

The fact that nobody is talking about this at all is at least surprising. I get that the interview is a few years old, but even in the comments I don’t see anything about it. At 2:19 the interviewer asks them who would win in a tug of war competition between 1D and 5SOS. After some back and forth talk, their answer nears an ending, but not before Ashton jokes “I don’t wanna tug any of ya” at 2:36 and letting out an adorable giggle. Michael doesn’t seem to take notice of what Ashton is saying. However Luke and Calum definitely get it. Now if there was any doubt about what Ashton would mean by tug. Just take a look at the Urban Dictionary. So Ashton jokes he doesn’t want to tug any of his bandmates. Does that mean he would like to tug someone else perhaps? This may have been a simple teenage joke and nothing else, but I think it’s important to at least take notice of.

“It’s not a guy”

This moment is honestly iconic, I don’t know what else to say. In this video they get asked some random stuff such as “first band you saw live” and in this case “favorite hometown spot”. 20 seconds into this video and Ashton does a shout out to Frankie’s in Sydney. Which is all fine, but what follows is where it really gets interesting. He says “spent way too much time in you”. This could just be a bit of unfortunate phrasing, sometimes our brain to mouth filter works in weird ways. Then Luke feels the need to add “it’s a rock bar”. This smells like damage control to me. They could have just laughed it off and made it into a joke. I mean, Ashton says a lot of ridiculous stuff at times, so this wouldn’t even be that much out of character. Ashton however must’ve felt defiant that day, because he decides to add fuel to the fire by saying “it’s not a guy”. Then he smirks while looking off camera. He is well aware of what he’s saying and I 100% believe he saw an opportunity and took it. Also a special shout out to Calum’s face after Ashton said “it’s not a guy”. Also, the fact that he says guy and not girl is something to take notice of. Now in all truthfulness, if he’d said girl it would have sounded rather gross and I probably would have to scold him myself. But I’d say Frankie is an androgynous name that doesn’t stereotypically belong to any specific gender.

“Boys, boys, boys”

5SOS reads thirst tweets is iconic as a whole, but one of my favorite moments is “boys, boys, boys”. It starts with Ashton reading the tweet, followed by Luke going “you can’t say boys like that”. Ashton being Ashton doesn’t like being told what to do, so he decided to be extra and repeat himself a couple of times. Now this may just be Ashton being defiant. But there is an extra added layer to what he says and how he says it. The way he says it is just so flamboyant, the way he stares into the camera he knows what he’s saying.

“If Walls Could Talk”

There is a reason I called my blog its-bound-to-get-loud and the reason is obviously this song. The moment I realized what the lyrics to this song were I had to look them up, cause it sounded a lot like a closeting song to me. After reading the lyrics that thought was solidified in my brain. I have written an extensive analysis of the whole song together with R. If you want to know more about our interpretation of the song, read our analysis here.

This has been my masterpost about Ashton not being straight. As always, this post is speculation based on my personal opinions. I hope it brought some new ideas to people who maybe didn’t think of this before. I’d love to hear your reaction if you have read this. You don’t have to agree with me, as long as we can have a friendly conversation about our differences I’d say we’re good. If you liked this post, please reblog it so other can read it as well. Tumblr absolutely sucks in getting my posts to show up in the search results and I don’t have a ton of followers either. So any reblogs are very welcome. A big thank you @full-of-lonely-people​ and @ashtons-ass for proofreading this for me. Your effort is very much appreciated!

[repentantsky]

Top Games I’m Looking Forward To in 2021 (Part 1)

2020 was a horrible year, but the thing that kept me and many other sane were the slue of great games that came out, or in my case, a combination of that and buying older games for my handheld consoles. However 2021, has a lot more games that are my style, so I’m much more excited for it than I was for most of this year. Allow me to have my longest list yet in celebration of this fact, and do so in parts as there is a lot to talk about, as I look at 8 upcoming games in 2021, that I can’t wait to play. To make things fair, and hopefully to keep this list as accurate as possible, I will only be counting games that have a release date as of my writing this. Also, my lists aren’t usually ranked by how much I want to play a game, as much as they are how much I want to talk about a game, so my most anticipated game for next year could easily be the first entry. With those explanations out of the way, let’s talk about games. 

8. The Medium. 

The Medium is a horror game made in a similar vain to Silent Hill’s Midwich Elementary, in that there are two realities existing at once, and you are constantly switching in between them. The idea is always one that has fascinated me as a horror fan, but the Medium really looks to amping up the scares by using the visuals that we can currently attain to increase the fear factor, instead of making everything pretty to try and sell people on that end of it. The gross, disgusting, and frightful looking world we are presented with in The Medium is one I cannot wait to explore, even if I don’t have an Xbox Series X to play it on. Regardless of anything, it looks like it might be my personal favorite horror game of 2021 when it comes out, barring no delay, on January 28th. 

7. Ys IX: Monstrum Nox. 

The Ys series is honestly one of the more underrated long running series in JRPG history. If you need proof of that, just play Ys Origin, Memories of Celceta, or Ys VIII for confirmation. These games are incredible. YS IX looks to be taking the series in a darker direction than most, if not all the previous entries in the series, and not only is that super compelling, but it seeing YS in a darker light, might actually go a long way in helping it become the franchise it deserves to be in the eyes of fans everywhere. The combat looking more refined than ever, on top of the best visuals the franchise has seen to this point only add to the excitement, and the characters, from what we’ve seen so far, also look like they’ll stand out in a series full of fantastic characters throughout. YS IX, probably won’t be my JRPG of the Year, but darn if it won’t be up in the top 5.

6. Little Nightmares 2.    

Did I make it clear that I love horror yet? I hope so because this might not even be the last horror game on this list. The original Little Nightmares was honestly my favorite horror experience when it released, because no other game really did a better job of making you feel isolated, alone and weak, which is the prefect setting for horror. While Little Nightmares 2 won’t be doing the isolation aspect as much as the first because of a second playable character, with the danger ramped up enough, which the demo seems to show that it will be, it should be more than capable of bringing out the fear that made the first so memorable. There’s almost nothing scarier than being a small child in an adult world that seems to want you dead, and Little Nightmares 2 has all the vibes set up for freaking everyone out. I doubt many in the horror genre will be able to do it as well as this game will. 

5. Persona 5 Strikers. 

Finally we are out of horror and darker games and all that, for a bit, as Persona 5 Strikers is easily looking to be my favorite warriors games of 2021. Not only do I love the concept of Warriors titles, but the Persona universe is one that fits that genre well by default, having a near endless slue of famous enemies to turn into either fodder for the thousands of kills we’ll get, or bosses that will gave fans a sense of nostalgia, espeically if they are fans of Shin Megami Tensei and older games in the franchise. I’ll admit, I’m a little bummed it’s not Persona X Shin Megami Tensei, where characters from both the original franchise and the spinoff can get together to cause mayhem, but it’s the next best thing, and I am all here for it. The story promises to be incredible, and the gameplay fantastic, with that Atlus special touch added in. There’s no reason not be excited about what they put out there. 

4. NieR Replicant ver. 1.22474487139...

Gawd, that name though. Crazy name aside, NieR on the PS3 was a brilliant game, that was sadly underrated due to the time of it’s release, a lack of marketing, and people generally not knowing who Taro Yoko was at the time. His history speaks for itself though, with the brilliant yet weird Drankengard series, and NieR itself really being a shining example of what he can do. To see Replicant, a game that never made it to the West, be remade with combat done in the style of NieR Automata, is such an exciting prospect that I can hardly contain my hype. Not only does the title look better than the original by miles, which was visually fascinating to begin with, but the wonderful and odd music, and everything that can really be expected of Taro Yoko is there in full swing. We are looking at an upcoming masterpiece I am certain.

3. Super Mario 3D World + Bowsers Fury

I’m not always the biggest fan of Mario mainline platformers, but seeing as I really found myself enjoying his most recent Switch and 3DS exploits, I cannot help being excited for the chance to play a Mario game I haven’t had the chance to previously, with some extra content to boot. Car Mario looks like a lot of fun to play, and the chance to play with up to four people is something I can’t pass the chance to play. I know very little of the game, other than it’s massive popularity and high praise upon release, and sometimes, it’s nice to go into a game as blind as possible, even if the story isn’t likely going to be anything to write home about. Whatever the title brings, it will be enjoyable to say the least, and possibly the most solid of platformers for 2021. 

2. Bravely Default II.

I won’t lie, I have a complicated history with Bravely Default as a series. While I did manage to power my way through the first game, it took some time to make it happen, and honestly, despite it’s great characters and even better story, the gameplay left me wanting. However, Bravely Default: End Layer was and still is one of my favorite JRPG’s on the 3DS, so here’s hoping enough of the good that came from that game, finds it’s way to Bravely Default II. Regardless of if it does or not, I always willing to give a format a second go, and I’ve already found myself completely in love with the playable characters, just from the two demos alone, so all signs point to a fantastic game that I cannot to wait to experience. 

1. Poison Control.

The best part of doing a list like this, is throwing something in there that no one expects, and may not have even heard of. Without a doubt, the most anime shit style game on my list, Poison Control is a game that might be more about the story, than the gameplay. The basis is you are stuck in another world, with two characters bound to one soul, and you’re goal is to remove the poison from people’s minds, by invading their brains and literally clearing it out. You might monsters and run over the poison in their heads, to hopefully make them better people. Despite the dark sounds setting, and even the slightly darker visuals, this is probably one of the most light hearted games on my list. I have to say though, there’s always something to these sorts of games despite their obvious lack in certain quality, that I enjoy. The game doesn’t actually have a Western release date either, so I’m cheating a bit, but with a catchphrase like “Purge Poison, Raise Hell” how can you not be at least a little bit excited for what’s to come of this game. 

And that’s my list. Did I miss anything you’re super excited for? Let me know in the notes below, and be ready, because part 1 of this list will be all about games without a release date, and that’s where the hype can really begin.