#and it feels like my biggest slay of the year so far by a long shot oh my god 2022!md found dead in a ditch
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go go go!! (x)
#my art#digital art#fan art#art#glee#glee art#glee fanart#brittana#brittany s pierce#santana lopez#gleesource#brittanasource#go for it nakamura#go for it meme#oh how i love a twt art meme once in a while#i started this almost 2 years ago and abandoned it for a while and then redid pretty much everything from scratch over the weekend#and it feels like my biggest slay of the year so far by a long shot oh my god 2022!md found dead in a ditch#maybe one day ill redo this in my own art style lol but for now this slaps so hard#massive thank u to bella for taking care of the text for me!! u are an angel and i love u
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closest moots on blr?
@mosviqu my tumblr sister friend mother everything at once tbh we've stayed strong for years atp </3 not even far in age but it still feels like i was raised by her blog at some point and then by HER bar ily we even had two kids together (thinking about reviving blank journal? also k-mystics my little yellow abomination)
@kyuzuberri my little sister i want to adopt so badly i would move mountains for her my dear tumblrinas pls always be nice to her y'all i genuinely want to be with her irl but we're continents apartttt ;-; kyuzu ily bby (my rock actually)
@atrirose i always feel like bullying her is that my love language?? ily my precious i will bite your ankles we've been mooties for a WHILE now but got a lot closer this year i feel like 🤭🤭 i mean this in the nicest way possible but you have a very punchable cutie patootie image in my mind i LOVE talking with you always
@lebrookestore my fellow soldier we've gone through so much on this site im her biggest fan fr i don't even remember when we became friends but it was at the very beginning of the pandemic i feel like?? idk idk imy ily i always think of you. big slay big purr for brooke omg im getting emotional thinking bout the good ol' times :')
@i-luvsang my soulmate ;-; this is the emoji i always use whenever it's about ria bc that's actually me irl whenever i see her im so happy so so happy she's been my friend for so long ughhh if im a sunflower then she's my sun she's the light and guide of my life there's no one like maria for me i hope everybody knows this
@wonfilms not me having the best y/n moments with my favs who turn into my friends ahhhhhh she was the coolest ever ever ever and then she became MY coolest ever ever ever?? mine ppl back off we've been moots for a good while too now that i think about it hehe
bonus @bywons in a very funny way i have to cackle every time but it's a secret she's my little secret ily sru precious always
#ii. ( pt ) —! anon asks#ask games!#i hope no one goes wtf why did she tag me?? dhfhfhhf 😭😭#i love all of my mooties my beautiful precious tumblrinas#but these are the people i talk to most often or who i have been friends with since the beginning of time!!#since the beginning of 2021 haha
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finally have at least 1 star on all weapons (except chargers bc fuck chargers) 🤭 whyd it take me 3 years well i like my shooters okay i dont have to do anything except hold ZR and zone out i dont wanna step out of the comfort zone LMAO
anyway heres my collective Very scientific research on everything that i barely remember bc i started doing this in like chill szn 2023
on average i got about 4 wins per weapon, outta probably 10 games and 4500p ~ish, but if youre actually good probably less lmao. and i exclusively play turf war bc anarchy makes me too angry (and im dookie at it ofc). and with stick controls bc motion ctrls makes me motion sick (go figure hey?)
shooters my beloved but yall are so right when u say the devs 100% favor shooters over any other class bc wow how do we have 31 shooters and still only 7 brushes💀 nozzlenoses took the longest bc i hate nozzlenoses HOWEVER some of the kills i got w them were nastyyyy i did not know they were capable of such destruction. also gals are kinda underrated ? slay queen idk. somewhat off topic but idk how i never 2-3 starred aerosprays ? i though i did but theyre both at 1 HAHA crazyyyy. and i may be bias but nzap is truely the underrated king of kings, they have some odd kits ('89 w the super chump?) but so fun to use i will not tell a lie, that being said if i see a ton of nzaps in the future im gonna be mad SHE'S MINE BACK OFF /j
splatlings as it turns out are not actually that bad ? who'uld'a thought HAHA theyre the most recent (and last) class i finished (literally got the last one like 1hr ago LMAO) ballpoint and mini are kinda fun i wont lie, naut is pretty dope i like the '79 kit teehee, hydra charging speed was the death of me but thats always expected
stringers were by far the worst weapon class that shit took forever and theres only 7 of them. like omg i actually hated every second of it lol idk how stringer mains have any happiness in their soul but i never wanna touch a one again. the wellstrings took me the longest bc i kept putting off using them i genuinely had zero fun the entire time LMAO i hate those fuckers hashtag never again
brellas were actually not bad at all ? i blazed through them idk why ppl dog on them so much bc undercover was lowkey fun to use lol (sorella has a stupidass kit tho). i think tentas were the worst idr why but ik they took me so long to finish i think it had to do w turf coverage idk. a lot of the kits were lame actually
buckets were great i love me my buckets, easy way to get carpel tunnel but theyre great for killing. Ive said it before but blobber is my only 5star weapon and i still dk how i managed that bc ive mained nzap for almost 2 years and im still like 200k pts away from 5star lol. it took me like 9 months w blobber probably, slosher deco biggest downgrade fr fr tho wth am i supposed to do w angle shooter and zipcaster HAHA. explosher took the longest bc im really bad with slow firing + huge ink consumption weapons, plus the aim is so awkward like why its it going over the opponent no go stright wtf. dread wringer surprised me plus the kit is goated, sloshing machine is weird i cant get used to it lol
splatanas im kinda bad at, decavitators took the longest bc its such an odd weapon (once again the charged heavy ink weapons are my downfall) bUT when the stamper hits connect it feels GOOD HAHA.
brushes i probably hit 1star a while ago bc its baby BUT PAINBRUSH IS SO FUN AHAHAA the amt of double digit kills in single turf wars i got w those fuckers i am ruthless <33 pretty sure it was all i played during grandfest and i got so many fistbumps HAAH
rollers easy dub as expected, idk how theres still only 11 of them in the 10 years theyve had time to develop the class but ig theres not that many ways to spin a roller idk. dynamo my behated they can never make me like you, that shit is so slow and so ink heavy and everything else thats bad HAHA theres a reason i put it off for last,, splat roller fun as hell mowing down everyone in sight huge fan of one hit kills lol, i have no recollection of flingzas and bigswigs but im sure i wasnt a fan bc once again slow fling speed but ik those kills were nasty HAHA
dualies i rarely used dualie dashing bc i used sticks and its hard to quick turn when ur rolling around the map, they were easy to use tho i think ? splat, dapple and tetras were by far the easiest i think dark tetra is the best bc of range and kit, gloogas were boring as hell and dousers were just fuckin weirdddd. but i think after the painters (check the tags) they were the first class i finshied 1starring
blasters i was never a huge fan of bc slow firing rates are frustrating to me and im not good at those swim-jump-blast ppl who main them bc once again i use sticks, they were lowkey fun tho i will admit lol. i love clash blasters now theyre so funny u just pummel an opp in the face like 7 times in half a second HAHA rapid blasters is an oxymoron (nothing rapid about them) but they were my second least hated to use so theyre fine. sblast was agonizingly slow to do bc they took the worst part of blasters and said hmm how can we make her hate this even more lmao
subs- suction bomb always the best, angle shooter my behated im not coordinated enough to figure that shit out HAHA, ink wall is stupid and usually paired with the least useful weapons lmao (big swig ? really ??). rarely used toxic mist when i had it but it kinda eats ? point sensor and ink mine are actually really good too im a new fan HEEHEE i love outing ppl LMAOOO. sprinkler remains one of the most useless subs in the game HAHA i wish fish sticks in salmon run were this pointless, never learned how to use fizzy bomb i felt stupid everytime i threw it jksjdllka
specials- inkjet i cannot aim for shit idk how ppl are so good with that LMAOO and zipcatser i will never understand you <3 anytime i had it in a kit i literally never used it bc its such a weird ability, reefslider killerwail and triple inkstrike are 10/10 as usual, i used to dislike tacticooler bc it gives up ur position in ink but ive learned to enjoy it especially bc its on my main lol, inkvac is weird and super chump is dumb, triple splashdown is cool but on the opposing side it PISSES me OFF when u still get splatted from an opponent even tho u kill them mid strike (also i feel like the range is wayyy off)
least favorite kits were the order replicas bc they were literally just that,, replicas so it was like yay i finally got the one star ! time for the next one- oh its the same exact thing again. yippee😐
i guess theyre right tho its actually a good way to learn all the weapons and kits, and if u know how to play a weapon then its actually not the worst ? crazy right... uh that being said chargers and stringers will always be terrible sorry to like idk gootuber mains or wtvr im sure youre used to it tho </3
anyway to yap since we're here; i also have 710 hours on splat3n, almost at level 92, i have every single non-catalog specific gear including amiibos, almost every catalog gear (need fresh past lvl40 and basically every sizzle rip), have every single weapon, almost all the tableturf cards (just need 11 fresh and 11 rare), and only need 8 more emotes uwu
#can you tell ive only ever mained brushes shooters rollers and buckets (the painters. as i like to call them) since splat2n HAHA oops#maybe i'll do chargers one day but im too impatient w charge weapons so for now i'll probably 2-3 star all my shooters lol#and before u say anything ive tried chargers multiple times this is not complete willful ignorance i swearrrr#currenlty and well always in the middle of 4starring painbrush og as well as 5starring nzap '85 its a slow go </3#long post#splatoon#splatoon 3#splatoon 2#splatoon weapons
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RWRB: Thoughts on the movie
SO a while back, i let the entire internet(like 2 people) know my thoughts on the RWRB trailer. i watched the movie last night. and i have so many, SO SO many thoughts about it. Buckle in kiddos, this is gonna be one long fucking post.
In honor of Mr. Alex Claremont-Diaz and his endless lists, here are some lists including but not limited to what i liked and what i didn't like.
What i liked:
Uma Thurman. Slayed as per usual. I did think they could've done more with her bc she's so much more mom-president in the books. Still, though, Uma Thurman is always amazing and it's amazing to see her.
The way they did the texts and calls? Phenomenal! Did they technically only do that once? yes but we ignore that for a minute
The way that they addressed being queer and the coming-out experience. Everyone deserves to be able to figure out their sexuality/gender in their own time and to be able to tell the world at their time and pace. And they made sure to put that in the movie. [Quick tangent: two of the biggest queer projects of the year(so far), Heartstopper and RWRB both have themes about coming out and how it should be. ]
The sex scenes were actually not bad. The "let's make love" scene never happened in the book and their first time having sex together was way more low-key in the book but I liked that gay intimacy was shown in a very unflinching sort of way. The book certainly doesn't shy away from-for lack of a better word- smut and I'm glad that the movie took a less fade-to-black approach. (and yes, reader, it did make me want to get dicked down. No, I will not elaborate, take from that what you will)
Phillip. I never thought that I'd say this but Phillip in his little 2hr condensed form is actually really accurate. he pisses me off and he's condescending and a real prick. good job writers
Okay. That's some stuff i liked. Apologies readers, my dislike list might be longer than my like list but its coming from a place of love, I promise
What I didn't like:
June. WHERE WAS JUNE???? i get that its a 2-ish hr amazon movie but still. You're gonna have Nora(more on her in just a sec) but not June?? June was a very big part of the book who is a big support for Alex and is just generally cool. Making Alex an only child did not feel right y'all.
If you're gonna have Nora in the movie or like combine Nora and June or whatever the writers/directors/producers had in mind, then DO IT RIGHT. Nora in the books is firmly queer and cool and like probably austistic and a hacker(?). She's got her own sideplot with the whole Richards leak(again, more on that later). She helps Alex come to terms with his bisexuality. And you're just gonna make her a little side character that gives Alex advice and is maybe working on the Claremont campaign. like c'mon. Nora and June are Alex's support system, they're the people he relies on, the people who have seen him before being first-son and after becoming first-son.
Speaking of Alex being the first son, i wasn't happy that they sort of just glossed over Alex's insecurities. we get a little of them in the emails but part of what makes Alex so relatable is that he is confident and he is smart and he does want to help people but he also understands and feels the difference between himself and Henry. Henry is white and British and privileged and has a myriad of insecurities too but Henry will never understand being judged solely on your skin. On being compared to someone else but understanding the double-standards that come along with it. i honestly don't know if i put it correctly but that is why i loved alex so much.
FUCKING MIGUEL RAMOS. WHO MADE THAT FUCKING DECISION????? first off, for those who have yet to read the book, Miguel Ramos is not in the book. Rafael Luna is. Liam is. Both men are very important for Alex(and Henry)'s story. Liam is a key component in Alex's journey in bisexuality. Rafael Luna's involvement in the Richards Campaign is also very important plot-wise. Luna is also one of the guys who Alex realises he thought was hot btw.
The Richards Campaign!?!?!?!! felt very non-important. like i just don't really feel the need to root for the Claremont Campaign or root against the Richards Campaign when they sort of take a backseat. in the book the Richards campaign is the one to leak the emails and its a more malicious strike against the Claremont Campaign vs a jealous reporter who the Alex hooked up with once leaking the story.
WHILE we're on the emails, i know that you can only fit so much in here but COME ON MAN. the emails are sort of the foundation of Henry and Alex's romance. they text(AFTER ALEX GIVES HENRY HIS NUMBER BTW) and then they email each other and its so gay/bi and so happy and so romantic and the quotes man the FUCKING quotes and i didn't get that and can you tell that the emails mean a lot to me
the "history,huh?" moment did not feel as impactful to me. fight me on that , i don't care.
Bea. Said it before, not how i pictured. But boy did they really reduce Bea. Mind you, she's got a very big role in Henry's life an they do try but the powder princess stuff is kind of important.
Princess Catherine. Where is she? Who knows? Again, cut for time but my gosh people, she's the reason Queen Mary turns around on Henry and Alex.
Speaking of Queen Mary, they switched her around for a king?!?!?! LISTEN i get not wanting to make real-world comparisons yadayadayada but Stephen Fry?!?!?! im so sorry that man is too nice for you to try to convince me that he's a racist and homophobic ruler.
Alex's parents. They're together, i guess? minor thing so that's why its here idk.
SO that was a lot of complaints and some good stuff.
You may be thinking "THANK GOODNESS, it's over"
WRONG.
I have more thoughts, dear reader.
Look, was it a perfect adaptation? no. adaptations rarely are.
Was it a good movie? yes. it was.
This movie made my little gay POC heart very VERY happy. it made me happy to see something that I treasure be put out into the world in a movie that I will be watching over and over and over. I'm obviously not pleased with the multiple liberties they took but I'm taking what I can. We need more queer everything out in the world. More queer books, more queer movies, more queer photography, more queer tv shows, more queer museum exhibits, you name it. Given the current state of the world and attitudes about queer people, it is essential to make and consume queer media in all its forms. Queer media makes sure that everyone knows that we're here and queer and we're not going anywhere. This is an important story to tell. And it doesn't have to be perfect. It just needs to tell OUR stories.
Henry, Alex (and also Nick Nelson and Charlie Spring) have made me want a love like theirs. A love that is genuine and real and honest and full of hope. A love who understands me and who I understand. To quote Dr. Taylor Alison Swift: "A love that was really something, not just the idea of something."
#alex claremont diaz#rwrb#rwrb movie#rwrb spoilers#rwrb book#henry mountchristen windsor#firstprince#sorry for the rant#rant post#thats my opinion#gay#bisexual#swifties#taylor zakhar perez#nicholas galitzine#red white and royal blue
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[kicks down the door like the kool-aid man]: hi oscar talk to me about your favorite scene that you’ve written?
Sorry this took so long to answer, I was, apparently, writing an entire thesis. You Have Been Warned.
Oh my god uhhh. My favourite scene…okay, if I had to go with one, it’d probably be the scene from The Valiant Never Taste of Death I unofficially refer to as ‘Everybody’s dying bitch, let’s get you some peanut butter’. This comes about a quarter of the way through the second (proper) chapter, Requiem (NB: if we’re going by AO3 numbers then it’s Chapter 3, since there’s a Prologue chapter as well, but I don’t tend to count that numerically), and it’s the bit where Nate gently bullies Brad into sitting down and having a snack. And then uno reverse-cards him into talking about his childhood trauma. [Slaps scene] This bad boy can fit so many emotions in it!
For those unfamiliar with Halo 4 (which in all likelihood is most if not all of you), you should know that for the most part, I tend to hew fairly closely to the story and plot structure of the game when writing Valiant. But linear first person shooters don’t offer the characters a lot of opportunities to sit down and talk about their feelings, so this scene is an oscartwofoxtrot original! Sure, the action scenes can be fun, but there’s nothing I love more than getting to write Brad and Nate in their quiet moments, and I crowbarred this one in here to really dig into that Deep Halo Lore and hopefully use it to get at some of the complexities of their dynamic in this AU.
Speaking of complexities, you ask me anything at all about Valiant and I am not so much going to unpack the suitcase as start pulling hat stands and potted plants out of it Mary Poppins-style, so…this shit’s gonna need an itemised list.
1. Nate: [Basically refuses to acknowledge his own mortality, but you better believe he makes sure Brad remembers to eat and take a break every once in a while]. Also, Brad displaying just how whipped he really is. They may not have the same relationship dynamic as canon, but Brad pretty much lets Nate tell him what to do most of the time. tbh I think he likes it.
2. We get another hint at the circumstances surrounding Nate’s capture by the Gravemind. I alluded to this event in the prologue but have thus far avoided going into too much detail about it, so you’d better believe it’s a Surprise Tool That Will Help Us Later. One of the biggest challenges of writing an AU based on the fourth game in a series is finding the Goldilocks Zone of exposition – too much and you lose the current plot thread as well as the attention of literally everyone reading; not enough and the whole thing is virtually incomprehensible to normal people who don’t spend all their time on Halopedia. Trying to get that balance right is, shall we say, an ongoing struggle.
That said, I have been having way too much fun throwing out passing references to stuff like this – and this particular occurrence is a Big Deal in the world of Brad and Nate, because I think it may be the only time they’d been apart for more than like 24 hours since they started working together. (The backstory of their first meeting is a whole other essay in its own right, so I’ll just slap a sticker on this that says ‘Ask Me About My Canon Timeline In The Very Unlikely Event That You Are Interested’). Nate had become such a permanent fixture in Brad’s life, I doubt Brad understood what it would even feel like to miss him until he was gone.
And now that Nate’s life is in danger again, Brad has a very clear understanding of the stakes involved. Almost losing him the first time…it wasn’t The Moment of Realisation (more on that later), but it certainly did crystallise some deeper level of awareness on just how important Nate is to him. Of course, last time, the problem was one of distance – Brad was light-years away and couldn’t immediately get back to Nate, but there was a fortress to storm and a dragon to slay so he could save him. This time, Brad is right there, and he can see Nate suffering, and there is absolutely nothing he can do about it.
3. Couldn’t resist throwing in a version of the Peanut Butter MRE Temper Tantrum lol. I am at heart a giant sap and I do love writing them joking around and just being incredibly fond of each other. Because there’s no officer-enlisted divide here, it gives them more room to develop the casual familiarity and vaguely flirtatious banter we see hints of in the show. The spectre of Nate’s Rampancy does cast a pall over the whole thing, but it wouldn’t be Generation Kill without some serious mood whiplash. Speaking of which…
4. Hello and welcome to my impromptu TED Talk on the Insane Fucking Lore behind the SPARTAN-II program! (On all levels except physical I am this Brian David Gilbert Unraveled video). That’s right: the Spartan-IIs were kidnapped from their families at the age of six and, to avoid suspicion, replaced by clones implanted with their memories who would die within months due to congenital health issues caused by the cloning process. And as Nate points out, the UNSC didn’t even have the justification of the Covenant War, because that hadn’t started yet! They did this shit because various colony worlds wanted independence from the United Earth Government – but that would negatively affect the economy, so apparently the only two options available were ‘bloody civil war costing billions of human lives’ or ‘covert military operations to quash nascent insurrectionist uprisings, carried out by fucking child soldiers who we put through brutal training and experimental bio-augmentations that killed or permanently maimed like half of them’.
So, uh. That’s fucked! And what’s wild is that even though this has been a feature of the expanded universe since the beginning, it’s something that’s barely ever touched on in the games. Nate only knows about it because he went snooping for Brad’s unredacted file not long after they met for the first time (based on Cortana doing the same in the Halo prequel novel The Fall of Reach). For what it’s worth, Brad’s stated mindset is pretty typical of how the Spartans themselves feel about the whole thing: it’s been normalised for them because it’s the only life they know.
Nate, meanwhile, is understandably horrified, and it’s clear they both recognise the parallels between their experiences – the UNSC took away Nate’s autonomy too, by the very act of his creation. In between the Gravemind and the Rampancy, it’s something he’s been increasingly struggling with: that he was brought into being as a fully-formed person to serve a specific purpose, with the knowledge that he’d only have an operational lifespan of seven years before his systems started to decay irreparably. I can’t put it better than the Gravemind did (courtesy of the Halo short story Human Weakness by Karen Traviss): “Your creators made you separate. They placed a barrier between you and the beings that you would be encouraged to protect, a wall you could never breach. They even gave you a human to centre your existence upon, a human to care about, yet never considered how you might feel at never being able to simply touch him. Or how he might feel about outliving you.”
Damn are you guys seeing this shit? This is fucking crazy! Anyway I’m Rod Serling
5. Rule number one of Valiant: Brad does not know that he’s in love with Nate. Ya boi is pining without even realising that he’s pining. This isn’t a reflection of how I most commonly interpret canon – I look at show!Brad and I’m like ‘yeah, there’s a guy who’s 100% self-aware that he’s simping for his platoon commander’ – but in this AU, the Spartans’ lack of normal human socialisation has left him without any practical life experience of things like romance, so he’s just not quite able to put a name to those feelings. Yet, anyway.
As for Nate? I’ve been writing under the assumption that he is aware of his own feelings, but isn’t totally sure of Brad’s. I reckon he probably has a good enough read on Brad to at least suspect that Brad might reciprocate if made aware of the situation, but without any way to be certain, Nate’s unlikely to bring it up. Even I’m not fully decided on when Nate’s Moment of Realisation was. I do have a few ideas, but it’s not a detail that’s ever specifically relevant to the fic, so feel free to speculate.
In conclusion: …idk man, it’s been a year since I wrote this and I don’t completely hate it yet so. that’s probably a good sign, right? sorry for rambling it will happen again
#me 🤝 jen -> answering these like four days late#on the other hand it’s taken so long that ao3 is back up now. meaning interested parties can actually refer back to the fic#and (maybe. hopefully) figure out wtf oscar’s rambling about this time#thanks for enabling me though! i appreciate any opportunity to be completely incoherent#asks#oscar writes fic#valiant tag
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Tear You To Pieces, Chapter 9

Kelly shut the curtains as soon as she got into the rather shabby B&B room. But it was the best she could afford in the meantime, she had no idea how long she was going to have to be on the run for, so didn’t want to blow all of her money too quickly.
She’d managed to budget herself to last on the run for around a year. She had to include hair dye into the monthly budget. As even though it had been two months, she had no idea if Loki was still looking for her or not, so she only went out in disguise to be on the safe side.
She was still not over what happened, what was still happening. And she knew it was all her fault, she would never be able to get over it. She had unleashed the monster, literally.
Not bothering to turn the TV on, she just got into bed and tried not to think about it all. The news was always filled with Loki now, and how he was conquering the world. Country after country was flocking to kneel under Loki’s rule. Otherwise, he was slaying every country that dared to defy him. Which soon brought them to heel, before they lost everyone.
Kelly was really jumpy, every noise right outside her room had her entire body going ridged, expecting the worst. It took her heart a while to stop racing after each noise. She knew she couldn’t carry on living like this, but she didn’t know what else to do.
Turning onto her side she curled up and cried herself to sleep, like she did every night. But her sleep was never peaceful, it was always laced with nightmares. Always of him. Most of the time, he was looming over her with her sisters’ body at his feet.
She woke up in a sweat, calling out for her sister. How she wished everything was just a nightmare, but no. She was living a nightmare.
Keeping on the move was her plan, so since she was awake anyway, even though it was only five in the morning, she decided to move on to the next place to stay. She had made it all the way up to Edinburgh by foot mainly but also a couple of bus trips. She just kept moving around from city to city, town to town. Wherever she could get to.
As Kelly made her way down the road, there was just a few people going about at that time of the morning. But she kept getting shivers down her spine, and not from the cold. It was like someone was watching her…
When she looked round over her shoulder, she caught a glimpse of a tall, black-haired man amongst a small crowd of early risers heading to work. Her heart started racing in fear, thinking it was Loki, she quickly moved on and walked as fast as she could. When she glanced back in the direction of the man, there was no sign of him anymore.
She tried to shake it off, thinking it had just been her imagination. Surely if it had been Loki, he would’ve made his presence more known.
But as she made her way further into the centre of the city, she still had a really bad feeling that she was being followed. So she rushed into the bus station and bought a ticket to head further North, maybe if she headed out of the cities and tried the quieter villages, she might be able to stay under the radar better.
Just before she was able to pay for her ticket, there was sudden screaming and panic within the station.
‘What the…’ She looked around in confusion, but then she felt pure dread run through her veins as she saw the reason for the panic and chaos.
Loki.
He had stormed into the station in his regal armour, the biggest grin formed on his face when he locked eyes on Kelly.
‘No…’ She gasped out quietly, her legs suddenly turned to jelly as she tried to run with the others that were panicking.
Loki made his way towards Kelly straight away, with large purposeful strides as he towered above everyone else that was scarpering around him in terror.
She started running for the back exit, but Loki reached out towards her and Kelly suddenly felt as if there was a collar around her neck that was suddenly pulling her backwards towards him. She brought her hands up to her neck but couldn’t feel anything there, but there was definitely something pulling her back.
She panicked and screamed as she was dragged back towards Loki, who had stopped and was just pulling her towards him. When she was within grabbing distance, the invisible collar disappeared and she felt like she could run again.
But she was within striking distance. And Loki struck like a snake, grabbing her he forced her to the nearest wall and pinned her against it, his large dominant hand wrapped around her neck firmly. Her lower lip was trembling in fear as he sneered down at her, she tried clawing at his arm but it was futile.
‘Mmmm, I finally found you.’ Loki hummed low and squeezed her neck a bit harder in warning when she continued trying to struggle.
‘Plea… please… Let me go.’ She stuttered out between trying to take big breaths, his hand controlling her breathing wasn’t making it easy to talk.
‘Oh no, my little pet. You should be begging for my forgiveness, for that little stunt of running away from me. You have no idea how much of an inconvenience it was when I came to collect you, to find you gone. Ungrateful mortal.’ He growled, squeezing her neck again for a few seconds, making her splutter.
He could see the pure fear in her eyes.
‘However.’ He purred, easing up a little on his grip he rubbed his thumb up and down the side of her neck. ‘I wouldn’t be in the position I am now if it hadn’t been for you. And whilst I should punish you for being a naughty girl and disobeying me, I will give you the benefit of the doubt. This time. Because I know you’re my good girl really, aren’t you?’
Kelly closed her eyes and tried to tune him out. But of course, that could never happen.
‘Look at me!’ He demanded and squeezed her neck again, making her eyes fly open.
‘Maybe once I get you home, you’ll be more talkative. And I shall give you your reward, and finally claim what you owe me.’ His eyes darkened and he smirked, then leaned in and kissed her on the lips, despite her trying to move her head away to no avail.
She had no choice but to endure his lips moving against hers, he was surprisingly gentle, yet there was an urgency within him too. A very deep part of her was longing at his kiss, like it was a reminder of what she thought they once had… But she remembered that had all been fake, Loki had used her.
Loki pulled back slightly, licking his lips. ‘Now come, pet. Let me show you your new home.’ He grinned wickedly and released her neck.
But before she could even think about trying to run, a collar formed around her neck. Only this time it wasn’t invisible, she could feel it too with her hands as she tried pulling it off. There was a chain leash attached to it that Loki held, so she was going nowhere.
‘Come on.’ Loki growled and tugged her along as he headed out the main entrance.
When they stepped outside, some civilians that saw Loki started kneeling for him instantly. Some ran away. But Loki didn’t care about any of them, he had what he wanted.
Kelly couldn’t stop shaking and crying as Loki slipped his arm around her waist and held her in close, then teleported them both to the airport where Loki had a jet waiting for them. He hauled Kelly onto it, she wasn’t sure why she was even trying to still get away, she knew there was no chance.
Loki had the leash vanish, but the collar remained. As soon as it was off, she ran as far back in the jet as possible and cowered down in the corner. Loki chuckled and took a seat near the front, looking very pleased with himself.
‘There is a much comfier seat down here for you, pet. It might be a bumpy ride.’ Loki called back to her as the jet started off down the runway.
But Kelly was quite happy where she was, as far away from Loki as she possibly could be between some seats. Though she knew it wouldn’t be for long, the jet was already taking off into the sky. She didn’t know exactly where home was for Loki. She really didn’t want to know.
‘You know, it has been ok since I’ve been ruling your world. Not quite as fun and exciting as I had originally hoped, but I realised it’s been because I’ve been chasing you. Now that I’ve found you, the real fun can begin.’ Loki said casually as he opened a bag of salted nuts.
Kelly shivered at his tone and words, she didn’t want to know what he meant by that.
It only took half an hour to get to their destination. But it had felt more like ten hours for Kelly, with Loki trying to make small talk the whole way there, as if nothing was wrong. As if she was there of her own accord.
‘Isn’t this a delightful sight.’ Loki chuckled, looking out of the window.
Kelly was curious as to where she was. So she slowly moved onto her knees and leaned up on one of the seats to look out the window. Her eyes widened at what she saw.
They were coming to land in New York, but it wasn’t the New York she remembered.
For starters, where The Statue Of Liberty should be, was replaced with a ten times larger statue of Loki himself. Then as they headed into the city, where the Avengers tower used to be, a new tower was built. But it was much larger too, and on the side of it was Loki’s name in bright gold letters.
‘No… No.’ She sobbed and put her hand over her mouth in horror.
#Loki#tom hiddleston#tear you to pieces#fan fiction#dark Loki#Loki fic#Loki x OFC#Loki x original female character
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A/B/O
The One That Got Away by whatacunningboy [words: 4,694]
Hannibal Lecter had this macabre air to his name. Everyone knew who he was and in what he specialized in—assassination was his trade and no one questioned it. He could make anyone disappear with a simple trick or two. He never missed a target, he was quiet, and swift. Yet, he missed the biggest target of all.
Ethics & Aesthetics by fragile-teacup [words: 106,330]
Pride and Prejudice omegaverse AU
Beginning and Ending by LittleUggie [words: 36,888]
19 year old Will gets cornered in an alley right before his first heat. Hannibal steps into help him out and decides he wants to keep the young omega. Will eventually comes around, against his better judgement. Let the mutual manipulation and power games begin.
I Could Just Eat You Up by orphan_account [words: 32,604]
Hannibal breeds Will. A love story in bodily fluids.
Sirens Wail by Breakmybones [words: 48,495]
Will has been an Omega since his eighteenth birthday. He's been a Beta since his twenty-third. Finding a mate was never a priority - staying out of the spotlight and keeping his secret was. Enter Hannibal: dark, dangerous and keeping secrets of his own, Will knows what he is from the beginning, but he's more interested in understanding the beast than slaying it.
Bright Hair About The Bone by MissDisoriental [words: 484,669]
In a world where omegas are little more than trophies to be bought and sold, Will Graham has done the unthinkable by escaping a forced bonding. Already in high demand as a profiler, Will's determined to find freedom on his own terms.For Hannibal Lecter the outlook is far more straightforward: a slow, systematic seduction of the most uniquely captivating omega he's ever encountered.As the shadow of a new and terrifying serial killer falls over Baltimore, the stage is set to redefine all accepted meanings of passion, temptation, horror and beauty – and to discover the ecstasy of a genuine love crime.
Not Interested by Watermelonsmellinfellon [words: 64,333]
Will Graham, an Omega of forty-four years, finally finds himself interested in an Alpha. The only problem... that Alpha is not interested in him! And he can't stand it!
The Only Place I Can Hold You by snapdragonpop007 [words: 27,865]
“Hello, Jack.” These past two years had not been kind to Will Graham-Lecter. The solitary confinement that Chilton had promised would help had only seemed to make the omega worse. “I was wondering when you were gonna come talk to me.” Will hadn’t looked up from the book in his hands. He was running his fingertips across the pages, and when Jack looked a little closer he could see that it was full of photographs.
Friends To Lovers by Sirenja, TigerPrawn [words: 8,008]
When Harry Met Sally AU
Consortio by kelex [words: 23,088]
Every Omega in the land is brought to the lord on the evening of their first heat. Lord Hannibal usually doesn't choose to exercise that right, but this night's offering is too much for him to pass up. A virgin Omega in his first heat, with brown hair, blue eyes, and a spirit that can't be broken.
Sharing A Bed by TigerPrawn [words: 4,150]
Will, Hannibal, Jimmy and Zeller are sent to Butfuck Nowhere on a case and the small hotel has messed up the booking leaving them with only 2 rooms between the 4 of them. And specifically Omega Will having to share with Hannibal, the only Alpha on the trip.
Stormchaser by YouAreMyDesign [words: 6,465]
One thing, Hannibal knows absolutely; Will is empty, all the time. He aches to be filled.
Pathology by YouAreMyDesign [words: 14,129]
In his periphery, Hannibal's head tilts. "Tell me," he purrs, "how exactly does one your age come to enroll in an FBI training facility?"
There Will Be Bells by Entropyrose [words: 36,639]
In Georgian England, male omegas are very rare diamonds. Baron and Baroness Graham have a plan to build their wealth and social status by offering their son Will's hand in marriage to a mysterious older Duke, an Alpha named Lord Hannibal Lecter. Will's personal feelings need not apply.
Alpha Mart by slashyrogue [words: 63,164]
Will needs an alpha. After years of fake knots, half-assed suppressants, and his own damn hand during heats he’s reached the end of his rope. He doesn’t do dating so he decides to waste his life savings and hype with the current trend. Alpha Mart.
Enchanted By Your Name by CarnivalMirai [words: 9,207]
“Now, my husband would prefer it if I got the job done quickly.” He says, slashing down the back of each gag as he passes each man, watching as the silk falls gracefully to the floor. “However, I want to have some fun. Considering you’ve troubled my husband so much… it’s only fair, right?” One of the men whimpered fearfully. Or: The name "Will Graham" is a name you'll only ever hear once.
I've Been Building Black Ships by cloudsarefluffy [words: 8,116]
Alpha Hannibal moves to the States with his sister Mischa after being overtly done with the fancy life of a count, and his blind omega neighbor gives him an insight into love that he never quite expected.
A Rare Find by hit_the_books [words: 5,379]
Life as an omega bookseller can be quite lonely. However, as the owner of Graham’s Books, Will Graham is reasonably content. That is until he meets—long-time customer and crush—Doctor Hannibal Lecter in person for the first time. Attraction blossoming between them both, Will agrees to a dinner date with the good doctor.
We All Have a Hunger by 1ntothew1ld [words: 12,260]
Hannibal will ensure a properly slow and painful death for an alpha who allowed a beautiful young omega to go to waste as this one has. Too skinny for his own good, a stuttering and humble mess. The likes of the omega in front of him belonged at Opera houses and in million-dollar mansions, not scrounging for his next meal. Meek and afraid in some disheveled row house. When he finally looked back up the alpha had to conceal the utter punch to the stomach that meager glance was, blue eyes full of innocence but also hunger.
The Doctor Is In by Kummerspeck7
Will nearly scoffed. "You can't expect me to believe you'd want anything other than a delicate flower to adorn your side, keep your ostentatious home, bare you the exact number of children you want--No more, no less-- all while being available at your whims." "Not at all." Hannibal disagreed. "I would no more put a wilting flower in my home than in a bouquet given as a gift. Tell me, Will, is that how you are treated? Forbidden from work, cloistered inside and used at Mr Brown's discretion?" "My Alpha's discretion." Hannibal looked pointedly at the curve of Will's neck, free from a single scar. "Not yet he isn't."
Sugar by Sweaty_dogman [words: 12,659]
Hannibal finds himself hung up on his friends mother, desperate to find ways to spend time with the omega. Will Graham is a beautiful, kind and single omega. The young alpha finds himself struggling to keep his emotions hidden.
No One Falls the Way We Fell by HigherMagic [words: 9,206]
Five years ago, Hannibal's mate died, leaving him with their young daughter. He's tried to move on, but Abigail keeps interrupting his sleep and insisting that she can see her mother in her room at night. Hannibal turns to Alana for help, and Alana gives Abigail a doll, someone to talk to and help her accept her mother's passing. Once the doll arrives, though, strange things start happening in Hannibal's house. It's impossible to consider, of course, but if anyone could defy death and return to them from beyond the grave, it would be Will.
Proud of You by CarnivalMirai [words: 11,748]
Will worked right up until labour to make money, through all the sickness and fatigue and swollen ankles, he worked to bring his little boy the best life. And it has paid off. As of last week, Hannibal has sent off his university applications. Medicine at Johns Hopkins, Harvard Medical School, Stanford University, and the University of Pennsylvania. He’s applied for a scholarship at all of them, and Will desperately hopes he gets it. He knows he will. He’s Hannibal, after all. His baby can do anything.
Venus Is Bright by wolfgraham [words: 7,237]
Tomorrow, he tells himself, tomorrow he'll set new rules, boundaries. He'll tidy up Hannibal's room and give him the talk, and download Matefinder on his phone. But is it so bad? So bad to wish that the world outside the two of them would just disappear and leave them be?
Creator by Caidepgun, wolfgraham [words: 5,589]
Will and his son, Hannibal, have an unusual relationship.
My First, My Last, My Everything by TheBl00dyFl0wer [words: 14,930]
Will Graham's encephalitis gets out of control and messes with his hormones, mutates him. May I present: Will Graham, the first known Omega.
Room 205 by HotMolasses [words: 9,220]
Will is an Alpha, but in name only. He's a hotel maid at the Graham Bed & Breakfast. He considers himself a freak; an Alpha with no knot, who dreams of a powerful Omega to dominate him. He's pretty certain that because of this, he'll be alone for the rest of his life. Then he meets Hannibal Lecter.
Howl by multifandom_fanfic_writer [words: 7,083]
When omegas go into heat, they go feral. Only an alpha strong enough to subdue them is a worthy mate. Will Graham has never found anyone worthy. After all, there is only one alpha Will plans to submit to – and he doesn’t even know their name.
Careful, He Bites by maxxeoff [words: 10,328]
Will Graham is a feral child. His dad died when he was five, and he lives with a wolf pack until he has his first heat. He's found, brought to Baltimore. Dr. Lecter takes an interest in him.
Predator by eijirouN_17 [words: 7,619]
Will hasn't presented, he doesn't give off any scent at all so everyone, including himself, assumes he's a beta. Then Will goes into heat. At a crime scene. In front of everyone. And Hannibal tries so hard not to go feral.
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The Snake Pit- Zutara one-shot
· Zutara drabble
· Fire Lord x Fire Lady
· Words: 2,700
· Summary: Katara wakes up from a disturbing dream that sets her day off down a surprising spiral. This is set on one day, post-war, Zuko and Katara are now married and living together at the palace.
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A snake, large and hungry peered out of the deep pit in the desert. She looked around for anyone, anything that could help her but there was nothing but dust for miles. The snake could smell her. It slowly slid out of the pit and crawled towards her. She wanted to run but her feet remained planted to the floor. As the snake moved closer, it grew in size. It hissed and opened it’s mouth. She could feel the ground shift as it slid closer and closer and bit her.
Katara jumped up out of her dream, sweating. She panted heaily and parted the knotted hair from her face. She stretched out her hand in the dark to reach for the glass of lukewarm water by the side of her bed. Her pants subsided slowly as she gulped down the cool water that felt healing to her body. As she drank the liquid heavily the body beside her started stirring. Zuko rolled sleepily on his side and glanced up at her through matted hair.
“Another nightmare?” he groaned.
“Yeah” she whispered weakly as she settled back into the bed, face up. Zuko cleared his throat and shuffled up the bed to place his arm under her neck for support.
“What was it this time?” he peered at her in the dark.
“The snake again” she sighed and turned to him, her face still haunted by the dream.
“Come here” Zuko pulled her closer into his chest and kissed to top of her head “they’ll pass Katara. Trust me. If not, I may have to jump into one of those dreams and slay the snake once and for all, like I did the dragon” she chuckled softly and looks up at him.
“You did not slay that dragon Zuko, Aang told me the real story, remember” she poked at his side.
“Well maybe I need to speak to Aang to get our stories straight on that one” His smile made her feel warm again and the last images of her dream seeped away. “You know-” Zuko began after a few moments of silence “You may be lucky.”
“Lucky?” she asked.
“A reoccurring dream, I mean. It’s good luck here” Katara scoffed “No, I mean it. We have gurus, oneirocritics, dream interpreters. They tend to live way out in the outskirts. They read futures and mix potions. It all mainly old wives tales, but the people in the fire nation really believe in them” Katara played mindlessly with her fingers.
“Oh really?” she grinned “and what’s your analysis Fire Lord?”
“Well…” Zuko scratched the back of his head “Maybe I’m the snake” he slowly began to wrap his arms around her “and I’m coming to catch you and make you mine!” he tightened his hold on her, his arms tightening around her like a boa constrictor and playfully jumped on top of her.
“It wouldn’t be the first time” she grinned daringly. He attacked her with kisses and she fought back with her own. He stopped and stared deeply into her, his arms locked and sturdy. Her hand rose to push his long hair out of his face.
“I love you” she whispered and leant upward to meet his lips. He leant in and deepened their kiss; closing the space between them to feel her body underneath his. He pressed himself down to feel her and they both gasped for air. A small moan left Katara’s mouth before the door to their room flew open and a strong stream of light entered in.
“Fire Lord Zuko, the Ambassador arrived late last night, he is scheduled to meet with you in an hour. Before that, you must remember to sign the Shi Treaty and write to General Iroh when you get the chance. Oh, and good morning Lady Katara, you are representing both the North and South pole in today’s agreements as Master Feng can’t be present unfortunately. You also will host Lady Wren later this week, but other than that, you’re relatively free today.”
“Morning Lou” Katara growled from underneath Zuko, still in their intimate position.
“Lou, what did we say? No interruptions until 6 O’clock” Zuko turned to face her. Lou was a middle-aged women with short greying hair. She was Zuko’s chief assistant and constantly walked with a long task scroll and a team of staff behind her. Her staff scuttled around the room, welcoming the morning in. They opened the blinds, began to run water, take out dress robes and placed a tray of fruit down on the table in the middle of the large open area.
“Yes sir, and I believe it was 6, 4 minutes ago!” she exclaimed. Zuko scowled and arose to drape a silk burgundy rope around his bare chest. Katara sat up and pulled her loose curly hair into a bun on top her head. She dismissed the servants silently and watched them file out the room.
“Lou, if we could just have one more minute, we would greatly appreciate it” she said softly as she looked over at an annoyed Zuko.
“As you wish my Lady, but we will need to get going soon” Lou bowed and took a few steps back.
“Of course Lou, we’ll be right with you” Katara smiled her best ‘please-leave’ smile as Lou exited the room. They both let out a big sigh.
“I hate it when she does that” Zuko sulked, stretching his long arms up towards the ceiling.
“I know, I understand she has a job to do, but a knock would be nice” she chuckled as she walked up and gave a light hug to his stretched torso. His arms dropped to her waist and she gave a light peck to the warm skin peaking out his robe.
“See you tonight then” he spoke into her hair and then swiftly headed out towards the door. “I love you!” he shouted as he left and she smiled.
************************
Katara’s day went relatively normal from then, she was pushed into different rooms with different people, signed many scrolls that were shoved into her hand. She bowed to officials and everyone else bowed to her. What had made her day worse was how uncomfortable her dress robes were this particular day. Katara had spent the first few months after she had become fire lady, trying her best to fit into the strange traditions of the fire nation. Their clothing was one of her biggest battels and the itchy silks and tight corsets were far from the comfort she has once known. After weeks of light-headedness from what could be only be explained as suffocation from her gowns, Katara met with her tailor to design garments that were less constricting and used a mix of materials from the water tribes and fire nation, that she was so used to. Being able to breath made her more productive as a fire lady and actually started a trend in the fire nation. It was common now to see noble ladies with fur trims and loosely wrapped fabrics walk the palace halls. This did not explain, however, the way her dress robes sat tightly against her on this particular day, which she was sure was to blame for the tiredness she felt halfway through her third official meeting of the day. She reminded herself to visit the tailor that week.
“Lady Katara, your next appointment has arrived” Lou appeared out of nowhere and interrupted her thoughts.
“Oh, I thought you said I was free the rest of the day?” Katara heavily raised herself from the soft chair she had comfortably been dozing off in.
“Yes, but Lord Zuko arranged you to meet the local oneirocritic guru impromptu this afternoon” Katara laughed out loud, unladylikely, and fixed the tight belt around her “is something wrong my Lady?”
“No, not at all Lou. Lord Zuko just has a silly sense of humour, that’s all” Katara chuckled. “Okay, so where am I meeting them?”
“Right this way.”
Lou led Katara round to the west of the palace, the quieter side. She met Guru Sying in a smoky room full of incense. She had placed several precious stones and branches around her and sat humming. Katara took a seat on the bamboo mat. There was a hot cup of tea in front of her that as she began to sip tasted sour in her mouth; she winced in disgust of the tea and set it down, trying her hardest not to insult the Guru’s kind gesture.
“Tell me of about your dream my Lady” the guru said softly. Katara fiddled with the tight fabric around her to get comfortable, took a deep breath and began to recount her reoccurring nightmare. The guru calmly ‘ummed’ and ‘ahhed’ at different points until she came to an end.
“So what do you think?” Katara asked inquisitively, genuinely interested to see if anyone could make sense of things right now.
“Well, the snake is not an uncommon character in one’s dream” Guru Sying began “the snake often represents fertility. And the snake biting you, is quite clear to me-”
“Wait, you think my dream means I’m, I’m…” Katara stuttered, unable to find the word.
“Well, how long have you been struggling to get in that robe” the Guru pointed out “and does the taste of duraaj tea always repulse you?” she smiled softly and gestured to the full cup sat in front of her.
“No, I can’t be” Katara shook her head
“You’ve been married to the Fire Lord for over two years now, have you not my Lady?”
“Yes”
“A long time indeed. And have you seen your physician recently?”
“No, I…..- LOU!” Katara yelled. Lou slid open the bamboo slides and poked her head through.
“Send for my physician please. Quickly!” She stared at Guru Sying in shock and Guru Sying held out her hands for Katara to take “Your dream is a sign from Agni, Lady Katara” she smiled.
************************
Katara sat in the bedroom all evening to escape the chaos of the palace. She slept a few hours until she heard the sounds of Zuko’s voice close by. She could hear him desperately trying to end a conversation as he retired into their quarters. When he made it through past their private commons, into the bedroom, he immediately dropped his heavy robes to the floor and stepped out of the first golden layers of the garment. Katara sat up from the bed and watched him silently until he turned around.
“Oh you’re here!” he smiled a broad smile as he came towards her. “well what did you think of my surprise” he laughed, smugness painted across his face, clearly he thought he had played a successful prank on her “did she get anything right?” he beamed.
“Oh, she was definitely right about one thing” Katara replied.
“Oh wow. I just sent for her to make you laugh, but that’s great if it helped. Tell me about it.” He took a seat beside her on the bed. Katara sat up and tried to speak but nothing came out.
“Katara? Is everything alright? What did she tell you? You have to believe me whatever it was, they’re just superstitious stories. Nothing to worry about” he took her hand in his.
“Well, she said the snake represents… fertility” she began
“Uh-oh, do we need to be more careful” Zuko joked and playfully squeezed her thigh, met with nothing but a serious stare “Sorry, I guess I should leave the jokes to Sokka. And?”
“And, she said I should be looked over by my physician” Katara continued “and… well. Zuko I’ve missed 4 cycles and my robes are tight and I think…” she clung to his hands “I think I may be, be pregnant Zuko.” She took the courage to look up into his eyes. He didn’t blink and she felt the temperature rise in their clasped hands. “Zuko?” she lifted her hands to his face to check for a reaction.
“And you’re sure?” he got out dryly
“Well, it kind of explains everything.” She smiled shyly. Zuko’s eyelashes batted and a hot tear fell and evaporated on his cheek.
“Katara” he began “I love you and you know I want to be so happy in this moment with you” his face fell “but you know how I feel about becoming a…..a father” his lips quivered. Katara had prepared herself for these words. Even when the physician had examined her and excitedly announced her pregnancy, her small smile quickly dissolved when thoughts of Zuko crept into her mind. She had remembered the long nights before their wedding. Zuko had finally opened up and discussed his largest fear. That he would become like his father, Ozai. He told her that as long as he felt that there was any chance of him being anything like his father, he would never father is own children, no matter how much the palace officials begged him. Katara understood him and welcomed his fears to comfort him. She thought, surely as the years passed, he would become confident in his role as Fire Lord and those fears of fatherhood would be destroyed; however, over two years after her wedding and she still drank the medicinal tea once a week to control her cycle. Of course, the tea was never an 100 percent guarantee, however, it had worked so well for them and their schedules with each other and it had been so long since she had had a pregnancy scare.
“Zuko, listen to me. I know you’re scared but you are not like him. You’re nothing like Ozai” Zuko’s face turned. I hurt to hear his name “-and you’ve proved that through your reign so far as fire lord” she held him sturdy.
“You don’t get it. That has nothing to do with who I will be as a father” he gulped
“It has everything to do with who you are as a father Zuko” Katara held onto his shoulder to bring him square onto her. “you are a loving and caring fire lord. You protect your people and are forgiving of their short-comings. You have made so many right decisions in your years in power and these are qualities I know you will be as a father” before Zuko’s head could sink any further Katara caught it in her hand and lifted his eyes to her.
“I don’t want to be like him Katara. I can’t see myself becoming like him” he wept “what he did to my mother, me, my Uncle, even Azula. It was unforgiveable” his hand rose to the scared side of his face. Katara stopped him and place her own hands in his scar. She stroked her thumb across the rough, hot skin and planted and long and soft kiss there.
“Zuko, you would never hurt me or our child. That’s not who you are.” He looked up at her “This child is our chance to continue what you have started as Fire Lord. To continue to spread love and compassion and all the crazy things we’ve learnt together with the Fire Nation. This is the way we ensure our legacy, what we stand for lives on” she pulled his hand to her stomach “I know you’re ready for this, even if you don’t know it yourself” he gave a short reassuring smile.
“You really think I’m ready?” he asked, almost like child. Katara smiled
“I knew you were ready two years ago, when I married you.” She leant her head on his shoulder. He didn’t move “you think I would have married you if I didn’t believe you would be a good father?!” she joked. She felt him settle around her, his hand still on her stomach
“I guess not” he lightly chuckled “It was hard enough to get you to marry me”
“Was not!” she pushed him
“You said NO!”
“-the first time” she giggled “we’re not starting this again” she stood up
“I’m just saying, I’m not someone who likes to ask twice” he followed her to the middle of the room. “So…” he slowly entwined his fingers in hers.
“So, we’ve got this.” She smiled into him “Together” he closed the gap between them and kissed a calming kiss that sank down to her feet. Two loud bangs suddenly echoed through the room, disrupting their stillness.
“Fire Lord Zuko!” they heard a breathless call. They both sighed and shared a small smile at each other.
“I’m coming Lou” Zuko calls back; he shares one last moment with his wife, taking in all her pregnancy aura.
“At least she knocked this time” Katara chuckled.
#zutara#zutara month#zutaramonth#zutara month 2021#atla fanfic#atla#zuko#katara#zuko x katara#lady katara#fluff#zutara fluff
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Yashahime Translation: Animage Magazine February 2021 Issue
Please do not repost this translation without my consent! This includes screenshots of any type and amount. If you wish to share this translation, simply link to this post.
For more information regarding the use of my translations, click here.
Regarding the Boy Whose True Colors Are Unknown
Riku, the mysterious person with a good smile and speaking words with profound meaning. He enshrouds not only Towa and the others of course, but also the viewers in smoke. Is he actually the Yashahime’s enemy? Ally?
The boy who proclaims to be “A pirate come ashore”, Riku. The figure of him showing a kind smile and talking quickly makes him seem like your typical nice guy at a glance. However, his speech has every bit of shadiness mixed in it.
The first sign was when he called the apple he received from Towa a “Forbidden fruit” (translator’s note: this was written in English). Most likely, he likened it to the story of the Adam and Eve written in the Old Testament; but why does he know about it when he lives in the Feudal Era? Also, the part where it seemed that Kyuuki of the Four Perils and Riku knew each other is of interest. Then above all, there is the dangerous statement he made to Shikabaneya Jyuubee, “I will take care of the Yashahimes, who hold three of the Rainbow Pearls, myself”. What exactly is the reason for him to go so far for the Rainbow Pearls…?
While leaving a strong discomfort, it seems that Riku will be on the move again in episode 14 after disappearing from the center stage for some time. What is the expression Riku shows before the evil mountain god, Homura, who’s heart has been stolen by a human girl? Even continuing into episode 15 which according to Riku’s voice actor, Fukuyama Jun, will be “A pretty big episode”. There is no mistake that Riku’s existence holds the key to the story of “Hanyō no Yashahime”. The strict prohibition on his words down to the details cannot be overlooked.
Character Bios
Riku The person who requested the subjugation of the Four Perils to the corpse shop. He is gathering the Rainbow Pearls and after Kyuuki’s death, he retrieved the purple Rainbow Pearl that she held.
Shikabaneya Jyuubee The owner of the “Corpse Shop” that deals in demon bounties. He lends money to Moroha and has her slay demons as repayment. He possesses the green Rainbow Pearl.
Takechiyo He can transform into a giant and fly the sky, so he runs around a lot as a means of transportation for Towa and the others. Miroku seems to be involved behind why Takechiyo works at the corpse shop.
Towa She has a kind personality, but she does lose her sense of reason when her little sister, Setsuna, is in danger. As she is a half-demon, she loses her demonic powers and turns into a human at the start of the lunar month (new moon).
Setsuna Normally, her “seething demonic blood” is sealed with Miroku’s Buddhist powers. In episode 13, the seal is released, and she repels Tōtetsu of the Four Perils. Unlike Towa, she does not turn into a human at the start of the lunar month.
Moroha A bounty hunter. Lately, she has been unable to retrieve the heads of the demons she defeats and collect bounties which has been the source of her worries. Just like Setsuna, she does not transform into a human at the start of the lunar month.
The Corpse Shop’s Big Client
Riku, who puts a large bounty on the Four Perils’ heads, is a “special client” to Jyuubee. To Riku, Jyuubee is someone who he told “I only kill those I love” and revealed part of his thoughts to. It appears that the green Rainbow Pearl that Jyuubee possesses also has something to do with Riku. We are curious about the two’s past!
Darling Yashahime…?
Riku and Towa met when a lost Riku asked her for directions. Then he introduced himself to Setsuna and Moroha after they fought Kyuuki. According to what Riku told Jyuubee, since he loves the Yashahimes, he is thinking of finishing them off himself. What is the reason…?
Hatred Towards the Four Perils
Riku’s prejudice against the Four Perils is to the point that he bluntly says “This is why I don’t like you” to the dying Kyuuki. He says the reason is because “(They are) unrefined”. On the other hand, Kyuuki knew Riku’s name and it appears that Riku and the Four Perils are acquainted with each other. Does he also have some sort of connection to Kirinmaru who controls the Four Perils?
The Evil God Who Loves a Human
In episode 14, Riku gets involved with Tamano, an extraordinarily beautiful human girl, and the evil god who loves her but has an excessively burning jealousy, Homura. A human and an evil god. When Riku sees a love that goes beyond race, he shows an expression different from what he’s shown Towa and Co, Jyuubee, and the Four Perils so don’t miss it.
Riku Knows Everything?! The Voice of Riku, Fukuyama Jun
Forbidden from revealing anything, even to his fellow voice actors?! The young man full of mystery, Riku
— From the beginning, what sort of impression did you have of the work “Inuyasha”?
Fukuyama: It was a show that started around the time I started receiving roles in animation work as a voice actor. At the time, it was a long series by Takahashi Rumiko-sensei that came after “Ranma ½” so from the start, it was getting a lot of attention when it began serialization. There were even talks of an anime adaptation. I remember there was chatting among the young people like “Who exactly is going to do the voicing?” “It can’t be anyone other than Yamaguchi Kappei-san?”. The work continued for many years and many of my fellow voice actors took part. I myself did not make an appearance but I had the impression that it was a “far away but familiar work”.
— This time, did you audition for the role of Riku?
Fukuyama: I did not. It was a discussion that happened suddenly, but I received a direct inquiry. It was right about the time when my schedule was a mess because of the COVID crisis, and I remember the correspondence being like “Are you able to take part in the recording schedule?”. For roles without auditions, generally there are multiple candidates so it’s normal to wait a while until the decision is made. However, this time I got the role soon after I received the inquiry, so I was a little surprised. Then, about the same time, the production of “Hanyō no Yashahime” was announced. After that, I started looking for the work that it was based off, but it didn’t exist. I became doubly surprised like “Oh, this is an original work!?”
— Riku is a character with a lot mysteries, but exactly how much do you know about Riku’s back bone?
Fukuyama: The information is to a level that I can’t say anything at this time. They explained to me his position within the work and what would happen to him before hand at the recording studio. Using that as the standard, during the first recording, I had a feeling they told me detailed points. Riku can appear to be androgynous when he doesn’t say anything, but when he actually speaks, he addresses himself as “Oira”, purposely says expressions in a tone of voice that’s almost like a fool, and knows words that he shouldn’t know. The biggest impression I got from him was that he could be considered a major supporting character and I felt that moving in secret isn’t quite what his position is. On top of that, after finding out additional information that I can’t say yet, he’s a more important character than I thought. The staff have told me “Please don’t say anything about Riku to the other cast members.” “We want them to enjoy this too” (laughs)
— That is amazing! It seems Riku’s mystery has a connection to the core of the story.
Fukuyama: Please look forward to finding out (laughs). In the first place as of right now, not only do we not know what intentions Sesshōmaru had behind his actions, but it’ll be a little while longer before we know the full story of the drama that is being spun. To viewers, I think this aspect will make them excited, uncertain, and anxious.
By Being Outwardly Suspicious, His True Intensions Are Wrapped in Smoke
— In contrast to Riku’s Edo-like phrases, you somehow feel a sense of refinement from him. Do you take care in that aspect when playing him?
Fukuyama: When reading the script, I wanted to effectively capitalize on the foolish tone of voice. As I continued to act like that, I think I started leaning towards the feel of an Edo person. However, you can blend the “impression felt from the script” and the “impression created from the image” in animation, so as a result from matching up the length of the lines to the image of the story, that may have become the impression that TV viewers got. Now that recording has progressed, when I think back, I’m glad I didn’t stick with the impression I got from the first script. The expression he shows Towa and the others, the Four Perils, and to other people are subtly different from each other so if I had completely contrasted those, his character image would probably have either changed or become blurred. When I first started, I was glad the image kept me in check.
— So Riku’s character comes together from combining the voice acting and the image acting.
Fukuyama: Yes. In today’s recording (the day of the interview), different from the way he speaks to Towa and the others, he showed an expression that he hasn’t really shown until now. In terms of what’s being broadcasted soon, Riku’s way of speaking breaks the 4th wall in episode 15. He’s a person who shows a lot of different faces so until we reach the heart (of the story), I want him to remain a character that’s hard to grasp.
— In terms of acting, do you receive any instructions from the staff?
Fukuyama: I was given the following order “We want you to bring out more shadiness than what’s depicted”. In terms of Riku’s position, as a way for me to show the character, I moved in a way that made it difficult to figure out what he is as much as possible. If you can visually see that he’s up to something, I would make it not show with my words more than necessary. However, I also thought “There’s no point hiding that he’s obviously acting shady, so I actually want viewers to really understand that”. By doing that, his intentions instead become less obscure as result is what I’ve come to understand as I play him.
— He certainly seemed like a good person but also felt shady when he made his first appearance in episode 7. It was completely suspicious for him to call the apple a “Forbidden Fruit”.
Fukuyama: In beginning, I thought I wouldn’t show any suspiciousness in front of Towa. While the base of the character is the same, I didn’t want Towa to harbor any sort of suspicion. However, with that line, I was told “You can bring out his shadiness”. In order to wrap the story in smoke, I think they’re going to show everything in that way.
Riku Seems Like He Can Obtain Things That Modern People Cannot Have
— It seems that recording is done with only a few people, so who do you record with?
Fukuyama: It’s quite spread out. We record with people we interact with the most in that episode so the group changes with each time. The first time, I was with Hosoya (Yoshimasa) who plays the role of Kirinmaru and then after that I was with Koyama-san (Tsuyoshi) who plays the role of Shikabaneya Jyuubee. On top of that, there was a time when I was with members of “Inuyasha”… By the way, today I was with Fairouz Ai (the role of Takechiyo). This work is the first time that I’m co-acting with her but man she’s a lively young person (laughs). You can tell she’s really enjoying the work, so it makes things easier.
— Please tell us if you have any memorable moments in the recording studio.
Fukuyama: When I’m with the cast of “Hanyō no Yashahime”, I get the impression of “This is a new show”. Around the time when Riku debuted in episode 7, there was a nervousness like you’ve only just started running. However, when I was with the “Inuyasha” team, it felt like a class reunion. The air between Yukino Satsuki-san (the role of Higurashi Kagome) and Kappei-san (the role of Inuyasha) felt like they’ve been working together for a long time and I thought “Oh, so this is “Inuyasha”!” The “level” of difference between each of the recording (groups) is what I found interesting.
— Among the episodes that have already aired, which scene was especially memorable for you?
Fukuyama: The episode where Riku debuted left a big impression on me. His aura when he’s moving behind the scenes and his aura of “No no, he’s shady but he doesn’t seem to be two faced” when he met Towa. The difference in his behavior was fun to act out. Like when he spoiled that Kikujuumonji was something he stole right after giving it to Towa or when he suspended the river water, drank it, and said “Anyone can do it if you focus your mind”. For a first appearance he had a lot of information, so viewers were probably confused. Towa being Towa, she didn’t seem bothered at all and it’s like “At least be a little cautious!” (laughs). I think you will understand the back and forth (between them) better if you rewatch it after watching more (of the story). With the expression “Pirate come ashore”, you’d probably think “Then isn’t he a bandit?” but there’s probably a fixation to that. That expression is also important.
— Now then, what are the highlights going forward?
Fukuyama: In due time, I think you’ll understand that “Riku knew everything”. However, on one hand if he’s an enemy, it would be contradictory and if he’s an ally, there’s a lot of things off. You’ll end up coming back to “Then what’s his objective?”. With that, I would like everyone to enjoy imagining what his position and future development will be. Among the latest upcoming episodes, episode 15 is a big one. While many mysteries will be revealed, instead of feeling refreshed, I think you’ll end up wondering what’s going to happen from there on. Once again, I feel it’s a very elaborate screen play. Also, in episode 17, Riku is going to move a little differently than he has up until now and in episode 18, Sesshōmaru and Kirinmaru will be making extensive appearances. I think this is going to be a very satisfying episode for “Inuyasha” fans so please look forward to it.
— We would love if you could comment on this month’s illustration (P. 37~)
Fukuyama: I see it’s an illustration of Takechiyo telling the reader “Your head’s too high!”. But in actuality I don’t think Takechiyo really knows who Riku is. I’m sure Takechiyo most likely sensed that he’s someone that you can’t reveal his actions to other people but in the end, Riku is a client. Riku’s immeasurable aura is properly expressed in this illustration. Boy does he have the nerve to show this attitude in front of people (laughs).
— Going forward, could you tell us an illustration scenario you would like to see?
Fukuyama: I’m sure “Inuyasha” fans will want to see “Sesshōmaru comforting a newborn Towa and Setsuna” right? Maybe Jaken getting his body pulled all over the place by the two babies is something that might appear in the main story. However, I have a feeling we won’t get to see Sesshōmaru protecting the kids. Thinking with Riku… How about something like Riku holding a PS5 (Play Station 5). Riku seems like he would have things that even we modern era people can’t get our hands on (laughs).
— (laughs) Now lastly, please give a message to our readers.
Fukuyama: I can’t say yet what sort of actions Riku will be taking from here on, but by the time all of you are reading this, I think you’ll have figured out his stance somewhat. I’ll be happy if you’re able to anticipate what’s to come while imagining it, but probably at this stage, I think what you can image so far will be different from the direction that the story is going (laughs). I will also be looking forward to what will happen to not only Riku but to Sesshōmaru and Kirinmaru as I attend recordings. It would be great if you can fully enjoy it until the end.
Q. Who’s Your Favorite Character?
“I like Homura who appears in episode 14. How do I say it, he feels like a person who’s true to his desires. The result that awaited him afterwards was impressionable. Also in episode 2, there’s the cameo appearance of the hoodlums from “Urusei Yatsura” that looked old fashioned, which was great. Then there’s Kagome’s younger brother, Souta! Though he knew about the existence of demons and time travel from his childhood days, it feels like he’s someone who has transcended (laughs)”
Q. What Is Your Impression of the Three Girls?
“I interacted with Towa in episode 7, but regarding Setsuna and Moroha, I heard their voices for the first time on air. I watched without gaining information beforehand, so I felt moved in a sort of refreshing way. The cast is either 12 years or younger than me, but I could feel the world of “Inuyasha” begin continued in their acting. They made me interested in “what will it feel like recording together with them?”. Including Fairouz-san, I’m happy that there are so many talented female voice actors.”
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midyear book freakout
I’m just a little late! Thank you for the tag @pedlimwen, this is fun.
Best Book You’ve Read So Far in 2021? I think it would have to be The Talented Mr. Ripley by Patricia Highsmith. But I also loved In a Lonely Place by Dorothy B. Hughes, and The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix.
Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far in 2021? Not sure if long series installments truly count as sequels, but that’s as close as I tend to come. Unfortunately, I read so many BAD series entries this year (Patricia Cornwall, I am seeking legal restitution from you). The best was probably getting around to Cop Job by Chris Knopf, which is not anywhere near my favorite in the Sam Acquillo Hamptons Mystery series, but still pretty good.
New Release You Haven’t Read Yet, But Want To? I picked up James Ellroy’s new book Widespread Panic as soon as it published, but I haven’t yet cracked it. Forgive me, demon dog... Also Razorblade Tears by S.A. Cosby.
Most Anticipated Release For Second Half of 2021? It’s got to be The Final Girl Support Group by Grady Hendrix, which sounds so corny and gimmicky, but I thought that about Vampires, too, and it was fantastic.
Biggest Disappointment? Lock Every Door by Riley Sager. It would take an enormous amount of convincing from a very trusted source for me to read another Sager book.
Biggest Surprise? The Bone Garden by Tess Gerritsen (my first by her). Though it didn’t quite come together as a whole, I loved reading it.
Favorite New Author? “Favorite” is strong, but I would certainly pick up another book by Jen Williams after reading A Dark and Secret Place.
Newest Fiction Crush? Okay, listen, I’m reading this Nora Roberts western romance from the 80s and the cowboy is very good (but a little bad).
Newest Favorite Character? Definitely Tom Ripley, of the many talents. Hate that I feel so much empathy for him! He is a horrible bastard that I can’t help cheering on! I must know what further depravity he falls into in the rest of the Ripliad.
Book That Made You Cry? A few of Ellroy’s essays, collected in Crime Wave, made me weep, in particular the one about his middle school reunion. And while I don’t think I shed actual tears, reading the potent vision of wretched depression the main characters live through in Charles Willeford’s Pick-Up was like gazing into a dangerous abyss.
Book That Made You Happy? I was having a Sick Day when I got around to the Hendrix Vampires book, and after devouring it in a couple of sittings, I was so much happier than before—despite it being a disgusting horror story, a deeply felt social examination, and also flagrantly indulging a particular insect phobia of mine (so I did have to “look away” from a few parts).
Favorite Book Adaption You Saw This Year? I can’t recall any!
Favorite Review You’ve Written This Year? I began using goodreads again in earnest this year, though I’ve already fallen off in use, due to busy-ness. The reviews I write are mainly for myself, to figure out exactly what it was that worked (or more often didn’t). If I love a book, I generally don’t write anything. If I dislike it, I need to examine why.
Most Beautiful Book You Bought So Far This Year? Sadly most things I bought were totally utilitarian. Even the Chip Kidd design on Widespread Panic is very whatever, in my opinion. There are some beauties on my “wants” list, though.
What Books Do You Need To Read By The End of The Year? I’m looking mournfully at my teetering tbr pile, which doesn’t even include L.A. Noir: The Struggle for the Soul of America's Most Seductive City. I read the first half in 2020 but I really need to finish the rest, for research.
tagging: @meishuu @muses-circle @paraparadigm @strangefable @maepricot @allenbyseyes
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my top 10 favorite kpop singles of the first half of 2021
i did one of these at the end of march, for the first quarter of the year, and this is my update for the second quarter, which obviously is also the first half of the year lol. so like, that’s kind of a big deal, we already know half of all the kpop that will be released this year, and im starting to have strong favorites that all the stuff from the second half of the year will have to struggle to beat, haha.
rather than do a big thing like my year-end list that i did at the end of 2020, i’m gonna limit myself to just three sentences per song for songs 10-6, and five sentences for the top 5 songs haha. if these songs are good enough, and they stay high on my list all the way through to the end of the year, then i’ll post big full-size reviews of them then, i guess. or if you want to know more of what i think about something, or why i put something where i did, feel free to ask me about it lol, i love having discussions about this kind of stuff
anyway here’s the list
10: Lunarsolar - DADADA This is kind of a surprise pick for me lol, and I’d be lying if I said that at least half of the reason I wanted to include it here wasn’t just because I want more people to know about this song, and also to surprise people with an interesting pick haha. But genuinely, I think this song is really solid, there aren’t many flaws with it that I can even think of, and I’ve listened to it a ton since it came out. It’s such a fun song, and if you like girl groups and you don’t know this song, then I highly recommend it haha
9: Rocket Punch - Ring Ring When I saw the teaser images, I thought this would be a disco concept, and like it kind of is... but only in the visuals lmao, the song seems pure 80s synthwavey stuff, more like Everglow La Di Da than GFriend Mago (and I’m into that, personally haha). This was a really cool comeback for this group, and I’m continuing to get more and more into them with each new thing they do! I don’t really have a lot to say about it, but it’s just fun and catchy and bright and loud and good, and yeah, it’s a song I’ve really enjoyed listening to a lot, which is really all that you need in order to make it on this list, you know?
8: Cherry Bullet - Love So Sweet This song feels really simple to me, but in a good way! It really feels like the songwriter(s) had a really good idea one day, and wrote a song for it immediately, rather than trying to start a song and come up with ideas as they went haha. It feels like everything in the song is in service to that underlying idea, and everything helps bring it to life more
7: Itzy - In the Morning (or Mafia in the Morning, whichever you prefer. I just tend to call it “Mafia” and nothing else, lol) Okay this one might be kind of a hot take, cause I’ve seen people be prettttty divided on this song, but I personally love it haha. Sure, the lyrics are corny as hell, but that’s nothing new for kpop, and I do think the use of the mafia game as a song motif is kind of interesting, I suppose. But honestly the biggest reason why I love it is the production haha, cause damn this song hits hard and the instrumental just sounds so cool (as do the bsides! their Guess Who mini album is my album of the year so far for sure, no question)
6: Fromis 9 - We Go I’m so glad Fromis came back with this song, and I feel like it’ll be a really meaningful song for me in time. This period of time right now, when we’re starting to feel like progress is being made in the fight against this virus that’s been dominating our lives for a year and a half... I think this song captures that feeling perfectly, possibly without even necessarily trying to. It sounds like a sigh of relief, meeting friends who you haven’t seen in a long time, or just the reassurance that even though many people are still very much in quarantine and taking things very seriously, this won’t be forever and there is still good in the world... that’s what it sounds like to me
5: TRI.BE - Rub-a-Dum This one was kind of a surprise for me lol, cause I wasn’t expecting to like a song with this title this much. I like Doom Doom Ta, and I would have put it relatively high on this list if Rub-a-Dum hadn’t come out afterwards, but I feel like this song does everything that Doom Doom Ta did but better, and in a bit more of an interesting way. It was written by Shinsadong Tiger and LE from EXID (just as Doom Doom Ta was) and I think this song has LE’s touch all over it, in the best way. I love that this song is kind of experimental, cause like it only has one verse... it goes Intro > Verse > Prechorus > Chorus > Bridge > Final Chorus haha, and i think that’s mostly so that you can luxuriate in that chorus drop as much as possible. The song just really works for me overall, it’s super solid and I just couldn’t deny that it’s in my top 5 favorite songs of the year so far.
4: Dreamcatcher - Odd Eye As soon as this song came out, it was another moment of “Wow, Dreamcatcher just put out the song of the year right at the beginning”, just like they did in 2020 lol. But as the year has gone on, I think I’m not as into this song as I was into Scream and Boca (the other two from Dreamcatcher’s Dystopia trilogy, with Scream being my SOTY last year). But like... a Dreamcatcher comeback that I feel is just fairly decent and not one of my most favorites... still gets it to 4th place overall haha. That’s just Dreamcatcher’s power, even the songs I’m not as obsessed with are ones that I still get pretty obsessed with. I love this vibe, it’s a really different take on a cyberpunk-y genre from other kpop songs that have dabbled in it, and overall I think every member slayed this (especially Handong who made her triumphant return this comeback!)
3: Weeekly - After School Okay, I’ve been pretty conflicted on this song, because even though initially I wasn’t sure how much I would get into it, it nevertheless is my single most-listened-to song of 2021 so far. Part of that is how much I love Weeekly, part of that is how fun the performances were to watch (and I’m counting watching those as listens to the song lol), but also I think it really did grow on me quite a bit, and I was even considering it to be my favorite of the year for a while. It’s a lot of fun, it’s really catchy, and it’ll probably go down as one of their most iconic and fan-favorite comebacks. It’s the kind of song that’ll get stuck in your head for weeks. It’s just very very very very... Weeekly, haha.
2: Everglow - First This song is a fucking whirlwind, and it really beat the shit out of me just like the members do to the camera in the music video lmao. It’s pretty different from La Di Da, which has become one of my favorite kpop songs ever, but I really really like it too. I feel like First is what Everglow were going for with Adios and Dun Dun, but fully realized, in a more complete form. I love how high their budget seems to be now, and I love how they seem to be really coming into their own as a group, I feel like this is the Everglow they were always meant to be. Honestly, I could see this maybe becoming my SOTY by the end of the year, and it’s very close (within 10 or so) to being my most-listened song of the year, but I do still think it’s too soon to say for sure haha
1: STAYC - ASAP This was such a hard decision to make, because honestly the top 4 on this list were all really strong contenders for first place, but after a lot of thought, I’ve decided that ASAP is the one I feel like I’m the least likely to change my mind on. I’ve listened to this song every single day since it came out, except for like 4 or so, which means that even though I’ve listened to it less than the three songs below it on this list, I’ve listened to it more consistently than any of them... I just have not gotten tired of it. It’s such a breath of fresh air for kpop. It’s kind of minimalist because it really doesn’t have any extra stuff, it’s very streamlined and it knows exactly what it is and that’s all it needs to be, and that makes for a very satisfying listen, in my opinion. This song sounds like what heart-shaped things look like. ASAP ❤︎
#if i went over my self imposed sentence limit in any of these... oh well lol#i just have a lot to say about things haha#thoughts tag#o#2021 list#i'll probably post some additional thoughts in a bit#and throughout the next day or two#and yes- i'm posting this before the loona comeback#intentionally#since it comes out so close to the end of the month... it basically will count as a second-half-of-the-year song imo#but if i waited until it was already out then i would probably be tempted to include it on this list (if it ends up being good)
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counting my way back to you.
Fandom: The Witcher
Pairing: Geralt/Jaskier/Yennefer
Also on AO3
3113 words.
General Audiences / No Archive Warnings Apply
Complete
It is not easy to make a Fae lose count.
It does not take much for a Witcher to worry.
If it takes a lot to make a Fae stop counting, then what exactly does it take?
It is not easy to make a Fae lose count. People say that, once you enter the immortal world, there is no way of knowing what time it is when you step back out. Jaskier had always found that foolish blabber, of course. It was a simple calculation: just keep count of the number of seconds you are in the Fae world, divide or multiply that by the number of stars in the sky when you enter - depending on the number of grass blades in the fairy circle you entered through - subtract the number of heartbeats it takes between entering the Fae world and touching a snowbell and voilà, that's how many milliseconds have passed in the world mortals know. A simple calculation, really. But it did not take long for Jaskier to realise that foolish mortals are easily distracted, it takes much more for a Fae to stop counting. It takes much more, but it is possible.
*
It does not take much for a Witcher to worry. Or, well, it does not take much for Geralt to worry when Jaskier’s concerned. To know your closest friend, soulmate, better half, husband, whatever you wanted to call it, is perfectly able to handle himself is something completely different than actually feeling it. If only the rational part of his brain listened to his emotions. Geralt sighed as he looked around him one last time. They had agreed to meet here, one damn week ago. And Jaskier was never late for these meetups.
Never. Until now.
*
If it takes a lot to make a Fae stop counting, then what exactly does it take?
‘Julek, you are to be crowned king this winter solstice.’
Breathe in, breathe out.
And Jaskier lost count.
‘You want me to do what?’ his reaction came, just a few seconds (minutes? hours? in the world of the Fae, who knows?) too late. Or was it right on time? The Fae world is weird when you lose count, however brief. But here’s the thing when you lose count: once lost, it can never be found again. Never truly. A decent estimation can be made, of course, especially for such a talented Fae as Jaskier, but finding it? No, even those who break the laws of nature in every regard have to keep to the mathematical rules of the universe.
*
A week later (two weeks too late, Jaskier never even arrived a second later than he wanted to. Sure, he arrived late, ‘fashionably late’ as he called it, but he arrived the exact lateness as he intended to. Even whilst Jaskier slept Geralt could sometimes hear the man in his arm count, count, endlessly count.) Geralt could firmly conclude that Jaskier was neither kidnapped, nor murdered, nor seen by mortal eyes ever since their goodbye at the end of autumn, when Geralt left the flowering field with Jaskier’s scent on his lips, his taste on his tongue and spots of white on his shirt he wouldn’t discover until three days later.
*
Knowing the number of days (hours, minutes, seconds) till winter solstice did not, Jaskier knew, meant knowing the number of days until he would have to be present at the tree where he and Geralt would meet, would rejoin their bodies and minds and souls and step as one, think as one, breathe as one creature travelling the endless continent. For yes, winter solstice for the Fae equalled winter solstice for the mortals, but assuming that the Fae keep to a linear timeline is a foolish endeavour. This solstice meant nothing, when it came from the mouth of a Fae who has not breathed human air for aeons (decades? centuries?). This solstice might be this solstice for them, but for Geralt? it could be a hundred solstices ago, or a million into the future. No, Jaskier had lost count, and there was nothing he could do to gain it back.
*
Five minutes into his visit to Yennefer, she confirmed his biggest fear. Jaskier was indeed not kidnapped, or drugged, or murdered, or bored of the life the witcher could offer him. Jaskier was gone. Simply gone. Unable to be found with any magic or spells or dreams or portals, lost to any who could not follow where he had gone. Jaskier, no matter how impossible it was to believe, had lost count. That was the only possible - even if it did not seem possible - way for him not to have returned. Either that, or- Geralt could not bear to think the words as Yennefer disappeared in a flurry of purple cloth and violet scent and muttered curses, looking for a way to bring the bard home. Home to Geralt, home to her, home to their little cottage where they would hide away when the world became too much for the three of them to bear, where they would have just each other, skin touching skin, lips touching lips, breath breathing breath, just them, just them.
*
‘Mother, why?’
‘It is time for the Fae court to have a king again, after the- unfortunate weaknesses of your father.’
‘The Fae court has not had a king for aeons. Why now?’
‘Because you are losing your way, Julek. Look at you, you have lost count.’
‘I have-’ but the words would not cross his lips. No matter how hard Jaskier tried, the sound dug itself into his chest, into his stomach, down down down away from his vocal cords, away from the air where the words would be sounded and heard and listened to.
‘Not? Julek, you have even lost the art of lying. It is time to stop playing with those foolish mortals and take up the role for which you were born. It is time for you to rule beside me, to welcome your responsibility and care for your people.’
‘Sit there and be an ornament, you mean, whilst you still hold all the strings?’
‘Julek’
‘I have not lost enough of myself to be unable to recognise your tricks, mother. Even if you crown me king, I will not stay by your side for long. I will return to those I love, and that is an oath.’
*
His brothers would have more monsters to fight this season, Geralt had resigned himself to the teasing he’d endure the next winter when he had to relinquish his 10-year record of ‘most monsters slain’. Not that any of them would blame him, if they knew.
Two months now, two months had come and gone and still no sign of Jaskier. They had fallen into an uncomfortable routine, Yennefer and him. Without Jaskier there to hold them together, to silence growing fights and touch their skin and hearts and souls at just the right ways to make them forget about all annoyances, to ply them and mould them and nudge them in just the right ways, the two of them had fought more often than they meant to, than they wanted to. But rather than leaving, rather than running away and slaying a monster and sleeping in the cold and dark and dirt and feeling sorry for himself, rather than running away and parading at court, manipulating royals and mages and feeling sorry for herself, Geralt and Yennefer remained. Every morning and every evening, Yennefer’s magic scoured the continent and all the known and unknown places beyond for any sign of Jaskier. And every day, she would portal to a new place, find new manuscripts, new books, new writings, new myths and legends and stories and they would read them all, trying to find a way to get the one who had stolen their hearts back to where he belonged: in their arms and in their beds (for Jaskier had never left their minds and hearts and souls).
*
As if things couldn’t get any worse, according to Jaskier’s calculations, he will have to leave a couple of seconds before midnight during the winter solstice. In other words, a couple of seconds before his coronation, in the middle of (for as far as there is a middle in) the Fae world. And, although Jaskier is a powerful man, even he cannot win a fight against all of his kind. They will find him during his flight, and they will make wherever he threads the middle of the world, regardless of how close to the border he will go. And it is not like he is ever given the opportunity to catch his breath, to see the stars and count the flowers and touch a snowbell and make a wish. No, for he is crown-prince Julek Taraxacum and a hundred million other names, and they will not let him go.
*
They talk. Every night they drink and stare at the ceiling in silence and drink and drink and drink and drink until not talking hurts more than talking and then they talk. One night it is just two words, on others two thousand. Yet the topic remains the same.
The one night: ‘I miss him.’
The next: ‘I know.’
The following: ‘It’s so quiet here.’
And, after a night of just silence: ‘No. I miss- I miss more than just his voice, or his touch, or his laughter, or his eyes. I miss his stubbornness. I miss his infernal, eternal unyielding determination to get done what he wants to get done. Regardless of the cost. Regardless if we let him or not. Regardless if I let him or not.’
From there, every night they drink and talk and drink and remember, painfully remember every glint and touch and look and movement and word and silent threats to those standing in the way between Jaskier and whatever he desires.
‘I miss his ruthlessness,’ Yennefer sighs. ‘That glint in his eyes and that innocent smile that threatens any who want to walk in his way. The ease with which his words weave a web and his fingers twirl a dagger until the whole world lies at his feet.’
‘I miss his sharpness.’ Geralt adds the next day. ‘I miss the way he yells and curses at me when I put myself into danger he deems unnecessary, I miss the way he hits at just the right spots to make you feel like you are absolutely nothing and yet everything at all.’
And, as the sun rises and Yennefer gets up to let her magic roam the world once more, always once more and once more again,
‘He is better than either of us could ever be.’
*
He does not succeed. Of course he does not. Not with his mother chasing behind him, not with the court pledging their service, not with the lesser fairies swimming his clothes and weaving his crown and setting the tables and not with the moon - bright, round, full and hiding the stars with her betraying light - rising higher and higher and higher until the Words are said and the Vow is made and the cape and crown and sceptre weigh Jaskier down and he is King, and it is too late (seconds? minutes? years?) too late (decades? centuries? millennia) too late to return, too late to escape and find his way back through the endlessly changing maze of time and space and place and all that the Fae world entwines and changes and corrupts and has been ever since even the gods can remember. It is too late, and Jaskier does not know if he can ever return home.
Jaskier still counts.
*
It has been a year without Jaskier and their nights cease to be long speeches, and fall into just words. Alternating, every night the other starts, and they - in between drinks, in between trying to find some consolation in being an immortal mortal and missing, missing, missing the one thing you believed to be a constant in your life, the person who holds your heart and mind and soul and who you wishes could hold you, trace your skin with delicate callused hands, touch you in ways you never dreamed possible whilst whispering your greatest secrets and knowing, knowing that there is no safer place than there, completely surrendered to the hands and voice and soul that holds them - just repeat the same list over and over and over and over until the betraying sun raises above the skies and their futile search continues.
‘Voice.’ Geralt drinks.
‘Touch.’ Yennefer drinks.
‘Laughter.’
‘Eyes.’
‘Stubbornness.’
‘Ruthlessness.’ They open a new bottle, stolen from some corrupt mayor.
‘Sharpness.’
‘Strength.’
‘Love.’
‘Compassion.’
‘Talent.’
‘Humour.’
Jaskier.
*
His second, third and fourth attempts fail too. Jaskier curses the patience and stubbornness of Fae as he counts to his fifth, unable to manage to smile because of the irony of his own patience and stubbornness being the things leading him to try again (he will try again and again and again and again his whole immortal life long, for he carries hearts and souls of value and he has to return to give them back). Yet as a king he is guarded too closely, kept too busy, held to too high a standard, and never, never, never alone (he had never minded being surrounded by others all the time, as long as those others held his heart and soul and these others certainly do not).
But as he reigns and makes decisions and cuts ribbons and blesses babies and is held as a prop by his mother who enjoys having the empty throne next to her filled and speaking as a Queen with a King on her side, he feels a tug. A small thread forming in his ribs, tying around his heart and weaving through his veins, first unnoticed but rapidly rapidly rapidly all-consuming, all-knowing, overwhelming and strange and yet so distantly familiar, tasting of lilacs and violets and onion and adventure and destiny and fate. He can feel it in his fingertips, spinning through his ears and knitting his joints together until his body feels like the restless sea and he can faintly taste the Beauclair White and Toussaint Red on the tip of his tongue and deep, deep in his empty throat devoid of words and song and him.
With every heartbeat, the tug gets stronger.
*
The best ideas happen when one is drunk. The most foolish, idiotic and dangerous ideas happen then too, but the only way to know whether your plan is genius or will end the world is by trying it out.
It is because of that reason that Yennefer and Geralt infiltrate the highest security library, steal an ancient manuscript and spend a full week without sleep translating their nightly list into the oldest language known to mortal men.
It is far from the oldest language ever spoken, but it is close enough.
Geralt feels a thread of something entwining his fingertips, rooting in his stomach and growing to his heart and encircling his skull. It meanders through his brain, wrapping itself like a noose around the parts of him he doubts and criticises and hates and loathes and tying it close, close, close, till no negative thought can survive and he has to admit that his hair his mouth his face his scars his eyes his everything is beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
Yennefer feels a thread of something extending from her hair, diving into her skin and spinning in the emptiness between her hips reminding her of the sacrifices she made, filling the void like a clew of golden, loving, sharp and stubborn yarn, pulling and pulling and pulling something, someone, the only person who succeeded in making her feel whole and beautiful and perfect and flawless and yet so endlessly, endlessly human.
They hold their hands, grab the thread so strong it is almost visible in the open air of their hidden garden and pull.
*
And then, just as he is once again paraded around for dignitaries and officials and others in positions that, by all accounts, should not exist in the frankly dictatorial Fae court, like he is some rare flower or pretty dress or beautiful painting or another essentially worthless, worthless object, the growing tug that drags him forward, that makes him walk quicker in certain directions or holds him back in others, that has interwoven around every cell in his body making him wonder why nobody has seen the almost visible golden string tying him to somewhere yet, why nobody has noticed he has lost his appetite (why eat flowers and grass and honeydew imported from the sweetest countries when the taste of your lovers weigh on your tongue and fill your stomach in a manner no food could ever equal) the tug suddenly grows stronger. The thread extending from him, through him, in him, grows from a thin cotton thread to a long string of woollen yarn to a thick rope to a cable filling his lungs and throat and tugs, and tugs and tugs.
And the world becomes blurred and the wind picks up and the chattering around him rises and then fades and fades and fades and the busy streets of the Fae city make place for an empty garden next to a lovely cottage and two pairs of arms wrapping tightly, tightly around his waist and chest.
*
And, like a breath Nature didn’t notice she was holding in, there Jaskier is. With regal dress and tired eyes and dulled cheeks, but Jaskier nonetheless. Their Jaskier, their life and love and joy and reason for holding on, holding on to life and the world when there is nothing to hold on to. He is there, truly there, really truly there.
*
If it takes a lot to make a Fae stop counting, then what exactly does it take?
A tug from another world. A hug from his loved ones. A frantic pushing and pulling and ripping of clothes, trying to get closer and closer and closer (true lovers can never be close enough, their souls are so entwined their bodies will always be trying to become one) to make up for lost time, to assure themselves that it is real, to touch, to see, to smell, to taste, to know that it is real, not yet another happy dream but real and present and here. A violent kiss. A perfectly placed touch. A hundred thousand touches in a row, all at the same time for forever yet for no time at all.
What does it take to make a Fae stop counting? Oh, although it is difficult, there still are many things that can.
But what does it take to make a Fae stop counting, without them worrying about it?
That is a secret only those who have loved and lost and found again can truly know.
#the witcher ff#fae!jaskier#geralt of rivia#jaskier#yennefer#yennefer x jaskier#yennefer x geralt#jaskier x geralt#jaskier x yennefer#geralt x yennefer#geralt x jaskier#geralt x jaskier x yennefer#jaskier x geralt x yennefer#yennefer x geralt x jaskier#the witcher#the witcher fanfic#the witcher fanfiction#written by me#made by me#counting my way back to you#Geraskiefer#Geraskier
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The Artist’s Way: Writer-director Radha Blank ruminates on creative frustration and rejuvenation in her debut feature, The Forty-Year-Old Version
Fair warning: This interview with Radha Blank isn’t business — it’s personal. Right now, like at this very moment, Radha is being introduced to the world as the writer, director, and star of the remarkable new Netflix film The Forty-Year-Old Version. But I remember Radha in the 1990s, smashing open mics at Brooklyn Moon in N.Y.C., rocking a fitted N.Y. Yankees cap and big hoop earrings. I remember her jumping into cyphers and catching wreck (read: she can dance her ass off) at Club Kilimanjaro. I remember sitting in the audience of her play Seed in 2011 and thinking, Damn, homegirl can write. I remember witnessing the rise of her emcee alter ego and one-woman show RadhaMUSprime at Joe’s Pub in 2014 and thinking, Damn, Radha can rhyme. AND she funny AF. Because Radha was (and is) a part of a close-knit artists’ community, I also recall her hustle, the keeping-the-lights-on-while-trying-to-make-your-dreams-come-true shuffle we know so well. Radha worked as a teacher, she wrote for children’s television and for shows such as Empire and She’s Gotta Have It.
So when The Forty-Year-Old Version won the U.S. Dramatic Directing Award at Sundance earlier this year, the community rejoiced! This wasn’t just a win for Radha, it was a win for the people. Here was a film rooted in Radha’s own story, about a woman at 40; a Black artist trying to get her stories told — as a playwright and as a rapper; a daughter grieving the death of her mother. Radha told her story her way, down to shooting the streets of New York on 35mm film in black and white. The result is a whole, liberating mood. There’s even a nod to Prince’s Purple Rain.
Karen Good Marable: First of all, Radha, congratulations! The Forty-Year-Old Version is amazing. Your success feels so much like a win for Brooklyn. A win for us all. Thank you for writing it. Radha Blank: I really did make it for us — us being Black women, Black women of a certain age, Black women artists of a certain age. I didn’t think I’d be starting a whole new career in my 40s, but I think it speaks to what’s possible if you let go of other people’s ideas of where you should be in your life. If I listened to other people and gave credence to their ideas, I would not be here.
Amen. When you were younger, did you have the boxes to check, i.e., “I need to get this done by 30, I need to get this done by 40”? Were you that girl? RB:
I think I was that girl. And I always say this about aging: It’s never really about the person; it’s about other people’s perceptions that you then take on. I thought by 40, I would be married with a couple of kids, all of my work being published, theaters asking, “Can we do a revival of this play now?” I really thought once I decided to be a playwright, which was probably my mid-20s, I thought, Oh, by 40, I’m going to be set up. I will have a house. And I do have a house, but that came from Cookie and Lucious Lyon. They got me a house.
Come through, Empire. RB:
I feel like we’ve all been conditioned to think that 40 is: You’re an adult, you’re accomplished, you’re established. What me and my character share is there’s still all of these “who am I” moments, questions around identity. Especially when my mother died, I really had to figure out who I was, because so much of my life as a woman, as a person, as a Black American, as an artist, was tied to this woman. When she died, I really had no sense of myself. So I feel like my personal experience propelled me toward telling the story. We just don’t see women of that age saying, What do I do next? Am I happy? Is this enough?
Your mother — curator, visual artist, cinephile, and arts teacher Carol Blank — figures prominently in the film. She is a goddess and a guide, but she also represents a complicated lesson in what it means to be an artist. RB: Oh, listen, I feel like everything I’ve learned, I’ve learned from my mother — from my frustration as an artist to being a teaching artist for so long. That’s where I learned how to be a director, honestly. I didn’t go to film school. I did stand-up comedy and all this performance stuff, and my first example was my mother. She knew how to turn a phrase or a joke to get the kids interested, and if they weren’t, she wasn’t going to push it. I learned from her first, and I tried to match her energy.
I don’t know what my mother went through when she turned 40, as an artist. I know she was a mom of two by that time, but I gathered — especially because she was a teaching artist for so many years — that she was hustling, jumping between these different roles, trying to make sense of something for herself. In that way, I feel like the movie and my journey as an artist brought me closer to her. I was like, Oh, this is what you had to go through. And then you had two kids on top of that?
In the film, your character is also a teacher. As much as she tries to model support and positivity, sometimes the frustration seeps through. One line stayed with me: “Don’t think that because you created something, people will appreciate it.” RB:
Yeah, I have been bitter. I was able to transform that into a film; it gave me a story to tell. But I did feel that theater as an institution didn’t pay off, there wasn’t much of a dividend. I had done a play in 2011 called Seed, and everyone was like, “Girl, this is your breakout! This is your moment! This play is going on Broadway!” None of that shit happened. Theater was not responding in the same way. I was quietly devastated by it, and I think the movie is my exploration of the why. How come things didn’t happen for me? Here’s someone who has been trying for 20-something years and my biggest accomplishment was 10 years ago when I was 30. That’s why I invented the 30 Under 30 award for my character: The idea that accomplishments are amplified by one’s proximity to youth. There’s no 50 Under 50 award. Or 60 Under 60. Being young and doing something as an artist seems more of a cause for celebration. You know what I mean?
There’s also this theme of displacement that runs through the film. In addition to your protagonist feeling out of place in the classroom and in the theater community, she’s also setting a play, Harlem Ave, that deals with gentrification. RB:
So, my parents were gentrifiers in their own way in the late 60s and 70s, when they moved to the south side of Williamsburg, Brooklyn. They didn’t displace people, because what they and their artist and jazz musician comrades would do is take over dilapidated spaces that were considered unlivable — broken-down lofts and factories and storefronts — and create community. There was an investment in engaging the community that came before you, whereas now I think gentrification really is just about an opportunity for the person moving in — “Oh, look at this dope, cheap brownstone that I can get” — with no regard for what came before.
Right. RB: The same thing happens with these artistic institutions: They find a dilapidated space, they revive it and put a million dollars into it. Then when it comes to programming, the people on the stage don’t look like the people outside of the gate. They’re thinking of their silver-haired patrons, because those people can afford a $100 ticket, and that is who I feel most of the theaters cater to. So when diversity shows up on the stage, it’s a version of diversity that protects the audience from feeling bad about racism or sexism. They can still remain in a comfortable place, so they can come back next week or next month and see something for the $300 membership.
But then you brilliantly juxtapose said institutions with the battle rap in the Bronx. RB: I wanted to show these different hubs of art in New York. This film is about capturing an authentic New York experience, and so we shot that battle rap scene at a warehouse space at the tip-top of the Bronx. Art and culture are happening in these spaces that we’re not always focusing the camera on and that don’t have the multimillion-dollar renovation fund of a downtown theater. But this is theater. This is art.
Is that battle based on an actual show? RB:
Yes. Well, we recreated that. Babs Bunny, who people may recognize from Making the Band, created this brand called Queen of the Ring. If you go on YouTube, you’ll see their battle raps. I would watch them because I just needed to see women slaying shit and not being proper or polite. I just wanted to put it into a cinematic world.
Your pen is equally hard-hitting, Radha. Rhymes like “Poverty Porn” and “This Some Bullshit” do so much in revealing character, advancing the narrative. RB:
Thank you. I mean, I feel like if we’re stopping to listen to a song, it should still be about advancing the narrative. We’re still moving forward, riding on this person’s frustration, but into the next scene, next act, or what have you. I think it comes from being a playwright, making sure that everything is earned and not just thrown in there for novelty or because it’s colorful and interesting. I feel like RadhaMUSprime is probably an explosion of her consciousness, the things that she’d been suppressing.But yeah, I’m an emcee. I rhyme. The beautiful thing about the film is I didn’t have to become a professional rapper. I don’t feel like the movie is 8 Mile. I say the movie is 2 Mile,
because she’s not trying to go that far. She’s not trying to be a hip-hop star. For her, hip-hop is a meditation and it shows up in many ways, from the trap beat floating outside her window, to her freestyling in the mirror, or with the dudes in the basement cypher at Arlene’s Grocery.
In some ways, the moral and artistic struggles of The Forty-Year-Old Version remind me of Hollywood Shuffle, Robert Townsend’s 1987 classic. RB:
I appreciate that you bring up Hollywood Shuffle, because I know that because I’m Black and I’m shooting in black and white, people always make the comparison to She’s Gotta Have It. But I feel like my film calls back to Hollywood Shuffle, about a Black artist confronting the white gatekeepers on who gets to tell a Black story and how.
Exactly. And like Townsend, you wrote, directed, and starred in your own first feature film. How was that experience, and do you think you would do it again? RB:
I wouldn’t say I regret being in my film, but I think that there’s probably more of a fascination with my film because I’m in it. And I have too much respect for actors to call myself one. I don’t come from training. I don’t sit in these auditions day after day. I don’t have to endure seven callbacks for a role. I just think that when an audience is familiar with a face, it might make it easier for them to go down the line with this person. So while I don’t plan on being in another one of my films, I do plan on mining my family legacy for storytelling, and on telling stories where music is a driving force.I really want to be an auteur. I’m hoping that my stories get quieter. Very quiet, but very potent. A slow burn, but such a beautiful payoff. I want to make work like that.
Amen.
Photographs:
Radha Blank on set, t & m
Radha Blank with her fellow cast members
#radha blank#the forty-year-old version#the forty year old version#hollywood shuffle#robert townsend#netflix#netflix queue#radhamusprime#black comedy#black playwrights#comedy#burn hollywood burn#black cinema#black film#black films
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Too Many Reds
One last oneshot I wanna share before Revin week. I swear, this is the last one-
Anyway, I originally only had plans to do one with a lot of Kevins. Much like @nunukim-182's art. As seen here.
But then, I got obsessed with an anime with five Reds. Which is Quintessential Quintuplets (Goutobun No Hanayome). Also, I don't just think Red when watching the anime. It is genuinely a good anime that I enjoyed.
That's about it, really. Hope you enjoy this!
---
"Kev~ Kevin Stoley~ Wake up already, please~" A familiar voice could be heard whispering into Kevin's ear. "Come on, Kevin~ Wake up~"
Kevin made small noises as he squirmed, slowly opening his eyes and seeing his redheaded girlfriend give him a look of concern. "Red? What... What's going on? What happened exactly?"
Red sighed in relief, gently pushing the male's hair back. "Oh, thank goodness that you're okay. No need to call an ambulance for you..."
"Well, none of this would have happened anyway if a certain brute of a lady wasn't so rough with him..." A girl who looked exactly like Red suddenly popped into Kevin's vision, the clear distinction being that she had massive black angel wings and a thorny halo floating above her head. Not to mention, a long flowing black dress and really dark makeup that rivaled the goths' makeup.
"Wait, what?" Was all Kevin could say as he stared at the girl with squinted eyes, still feeling disoriented from waking up.
"Hmph, stop acting all high and mighty! Which you are not, by the way!" Another girl who looked like Red showed herself to the male's vision, her differences this time being that she had on a Viking helmet atop her wild unruly hair that had a few baby braids scattered about and a large battle axe strapped behind her.
"Alright, alright... Girls, I think we should all calm down before we end up scaring Kev off again like last time..." You guessed it, yet another Red clone was with them. This one had clothes resembling that of a pirates, with large gold accessories and a huge scar across her face to go along with the look.
"Oh, shut your mouth! You have no right to boss us around like that! You're not that much older than we are!" Viking Red yells at her, huffing and crossing her arms. "Stop acting like you can easily just be the middle man between the five of us!"
"Hmph! As much as I hate agreeing with such a brute like you, you're right!" Dark Angel Red puts her hands on her hips the turns to Pirate Red. "Don't you ever dare boss us around like that again!"
Pirate Red let out a few nervous laughs as she raises her hands in defeat. "I'm sorry if it seemed like I was bossing you around, you two. I just don't like any fighting between us..."
"She is right about one thing, though!" And then, one final Red showed up. She had three tentacle looking aliens wrapped around her along with a clear green visor over her eyes. "Look, Kevin looks really freaked out at us!" The alien points at the male which makes him jump and get even more nervous.
All five Red looks over at him, making him jump again. Viking Red spoke up first and squinted her eyes at him. "And so he does... What the heck, Kev? Why are you looking at us as if you had only just met us? Huh?"
"Because I have just met you!" He yelled out, getting off his girlfriend's lap, if she even was his girlfriend as he was having serious doubts after witnessing to what was right in front of him. "Red! What the fuck?! Why are there like... four more of you?! And who the fuck are you four?!"
"Umm... Kev, there's always been four of me? Hell, you've meet all five of us before..." Normal Red raised a brow at him, giving him a confused look.
Viking Red angrily pouts at his words, her face looking exactly the way Red does whenever she gets angry. "Hmph! Typical of you to forget about us just like that, Stoley..."
Kevin was about to speak up but Pirate Red beat him to it, letting out a few laughs before she spoke. "Well, the stunt you did with him was pretty severe... Maybe it did a number on his noggin there..."
"So, you're saying it's my fault he's like this?! Typical! Always blaming me when something goes wrong with Kevin!" Viking Red huffs, looking away as she crossed her arms.
"There's no point in arguing about him losing his memory now... All we have to do is introduce ourselves to him all over again. That sounds like the most plausible thing to do... What says you, Alien Red?" Normal Red turns to Alien Red who was happily playing and petting with her aliens. "Alien Red?"
"Hmm? Oh! Me!" Alien Red giggles cheekily and rubs the back of her neck then immediately loses the cheery expression. "Well, first off! Call me by my proper title, you peasants! I am a queen by birth!"
"Didn't you technically renounce that title of yours, princess?" Viking Red smirked, glancing over at her before looking away again.
"W-well... Again, I am a queen! And so I did... Because ruling my kingdom became too much to me... But I am still a queen in my heart!" Alien Queen Red gave a proud grin before turning back to Normal Red. "Wait, Red... What was your question again? I forgot..." She giggles shyly and rubbed the back of her neck.
"Typical... Despite being the oldest one here, you are such the airhead..." More giggles could be heard from the alien. "Then again, you got distracted by yet another snarky comment from our dragonslayer who hasn't even slain a dragon herself for years now..."
"Ooh! You just got roasted, girl!" Pirate Red hollered. "And not even by a dragon as you haven't even seen one in ages! Oh! You just got burned again! How does that make you feel, so-called dragonslayer?!"
Dragonslayer Red smirked as she looked down. "Why, just great, really... It gave me the genius thought that if I can't slay a dragon right now, I'll just slay one of you bitches right now!" She grabs her battle axe from behind her back, ready to swing it right to the pirate's neck.
Dark Angel Red sighed as she used some of her dark magic to stop the dragonslayer before she could even get near the pirate. "What is also typical is all four of you acting with literally no class! Like a bunch of children!" She huffs as she lets go of the dragonslayer. "Let's just get the introductions over with already! I'll just do it for us, even!"
She clears her throat before turning to Kevin, giving him a small curtsy. "Greetings, Kevin Stoley. My name is Dark Angel Red... I know it might be pretty obvious with how I look, that is what I'm named. But just to make things clear and all that..." She points to Alien Queen Red.
"Now, you might have heard her name already but I'll still introduce her, either way. Her former Majesty, Alien Queen Rivqah of the planet Cervana. We mostly just call her Alien Queen Red for short."
Alien Queen Red waved at Kevin and he responded with a small wave back, letting out a nervous laugh as he did so.
"Now, here is-" Dragonslayer Red cuts her off, scoffing loudly as she puts her axe back on her back.
"Oh, I'll damn myself to death first before I even think of letting a stuck up bitch like you introduce someone like me..." Dark Angel Red just rolled her eyes in response. "Anyways..." She spits on the ground and crosses her arms before giving Kevin a death glare, making him gulp nervously.
"I'm impressed you managed to forget someone like me... Unlike these whiny girlies..." The other four girls glare at her after she said that. "I have a personality worth remembering..." She proudly said along with a huge grin, a hand on her chest.
"Umm, I think you were supposed to introduce yourself there... Did you forget to?" Alien Queen Red pointed out, making her face go red and the other Reds giggle under their breath.
"I- Uh- Of course not! I was just getting to it and you interrupted me!" She let out another loud huff and crossed her arms again.
"Oh, right! Of course! My mistake, Dragonslayer Red! Go on then!" The alien giggles innocently, a small smile on her face.
"I mean... You fucking ruined my introduction by saying my name there but..." Dragonslayer Red looked over at Kevin and pointed a finger at him. "You heard it, Stoley... The name's Dragonslayer Red and you better not forget it. Got it?"
"G-got it!" Kevin nodded, shakily raising his hand to give a thumbs up.
This, for some strange reason, got the dragonslayer all flustered, making her look away and cover her face with one hand. "D-damnit... Why must you do that?"
"H-huh? D-do what?" The male asked with a confused expression on his face.
"Ugh! Be a nuisance, obviously!" She angrily yelled, growling underneath her breath.
"S-sorry then!" He raised his hands in defeat, this version of Red definitely being his least favorite with how hostile she was to him.
"And there you go again! Such a nuisance!" She huffed, walking away from the small group to clean her axe.
"Uh..." Kevin wanted to approach her and apologize but was scared she would just snap at him again.
"Oh, just ignore Dragonslayer Red, Kev... She's the biggest tsundere between all five of us..." Pirate Red giggled, waving a hand in the air.
"I am not a tsundere!" Dragonslayer Red yelled. "How many times do I have to tell all you girlies that?!"
Pirate Red laughs a bit before turning to Kevin. "Guess it's my turn, hmm? From my get- up, you would assume my name would be something as simple as say... Pirate Red?" Kevin nodded at her question. "Well, wrong! I'm actually Swashbuckler Red! I used to travel far and wide to find booty..." She smirks at Kevin. "Then I found a booty worth staying for~" She finished with a wink.
Normal Red immediately pushes her away before Kevin could say anything more. "I, uh... Hi, Kev... You obviously already know me... I just get called Red... As there's nothing that special about me..." She nervously laughs before clearing her throat. "Anyways.. Kev, after that whole mess, do you remember us now?" Normal Red asked as all five of the girls stood in a line before him.
"Uh... No! Actually, that whole introduction thing didn't help me at all! Look, I didn't hit my head, lose my memory or anything else!" Kevin yelled as he slowly walked back but all five Red simply just walked towards him.
"Hmm... It seems to be that his condition can't be treated by us simply introducing ourselves... I think each of us need to spend more alone time with him and help him remember something about us..." Dark Angel squinted her eyes at him.
"Oh, yes! Sounds the most scientifically accurate way to get better results!" Alien Queen Red happily exclaimed, wrapping her arms around one of his. "I get first dibs on hanging out with him alone!"
"Uh, no..." Normal Red grabbed hold of his other arm. "What makes you have the right to do that? Nothing, right? Therefore, I have the first dibs on getting him alone because-"
"You're his best friend, blah, blah, blah... We know..." Dragonslayer Red groaned and rolled her eyes as she grabbed Kevin by his collar. "That is a shitty excuse, girly. If anything, he should get to know me first seeing as I am the most amazing and cool one between us..."
"Oh, please... You don't even like him. So, why even bother introducing yourself to him, you filthy brute?" Dark Angel Red huffed as she grabbed hold of Kevin's leg.
"W-well..." Dragonslayer Red started getting flustered, shaking her head to get rid of it. "Whatever! What do you care?! This is my life, not yours! I do what I want with it!"
As all the Reds started yelling and fighting over him, Kevin ended up screaming on the top of his lungs. And that was when he woke up from the horrible nightmare he had... Kevin was now back in his bed with a slowly waking up Red beside him.
"Ugh, Kevin... What the heck, sweetie? It's like..." She checks the alarm clock. "3 in the morning... What's with the scream- Ah!" She yelps as the male hugs her. "A hug? Geez, if you wanted to cuddle while we slept, you could have just asked..." She blushed as she hugged back.
"Oh, it's you! It's really you! The one and only you!" He happily exclaimed, hugging her with tears in his eyes.
"Uh, yeah? It is me? And there is only one me? Why are you saying the obvious to me?" She looks down at him with a confused look.
"I..." He chuckled softly as he cuddles up to her. "Okay, this might sound crazy... But I actually ended up having the same nightmare you had a while back..."
Red laughs at this, cuddling him back. "Please... Kevin, we live in South Park... That's the least crazy sounding thing to be said ever..." She kisses the top of his forehead. "But that nightmare made you realize something, right?"
He gave her a nod and a kiss on cheek. "Mhmm, firstly... More than one Red is not Heaven, it is fucking Hell..." Red laughs at him again. "And that... I'm really happy with the one and only Red I have... The perfect Red for me..." He smiled up at her before they went to sleep again.
#sp red tucker#red sp#red x kevin#red mcarthur#sp kevin#kevin stoley#kevin x red#sp red#red tucker#south park red#sp revin#revin#south park#south park ships#sp ships#oneshot
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Can I just say that Habs “fans” who act like Carey Price’s contract is somehow patient zero of all this team’s problems drive me absolutely fucking insane? Seriously. Buckle up. This is about to be a rant.

Now. First things first. Is it ideal that the $10 million goalie is currently uh, not doing very good? Fucking NO! I am disappointed as shit with that and I don’t like seeing him struggle. I know he can be better. He has to be better. Obviously.
However. That being said.
Do I think it’s an incredibly stupid look to spend several tweets complaining about all the issues Habs defence have been having, and then also griping that they haven’t started Jake Allen enough for how he’s performing, only to then for some inexplicable reason state that the FIRST THING, the first thing that needs to be dealt with after the new coaching staff have had ONE GAME (and zero practices) to work on things, is somehow “well, the ten million dollar man in net is weighing them down, that contract has gotta go!”?
Yes! That’s stupid!!
I think that’s a very ice cold small-brain take, and not just because Price is my favourite of favourites for as long as I’ve been a hockey fan! I have reasons, dammit!! I put THOUGHT into this!!
Here, dear ppl of Habs twitter who will never read this, are some reasons why this narrative you’re concocting is dumb, and why management/coaching are unlikely to think of trying to ditch Price mid-season to fix the current problems:
1: Time. It has been one (1) game under Ducharme. He has been able to run zero (0) full practices on off days with the team. We just changed up a major piece on the Habs chess board — why don’t you give it a minute to see what fresh eyes and minds can do with this roster before you decide we are fucked? This season is fast-moving, sure, but there is time for us to ride out some little bumps here and still make a playoff spot in this Canadian division. Have patience. Do you remember what patience is? Dom is a new head coach, not a wish-granting fairy godmother. Chill. Do you remember chill?
(rest of this under a cut because I actually LIKE Habs Tumblr, and I want to be nice to you all by not making you scroll past all of it if you don’t want to)
2: Jake Allen exists. There are a couple of things I like for what this means for the Habs. Firstly, for basically the first time in his NHL career, we are not in a situation where if Carey Price is in a slump, we have to go “Ah, shit, so now our options are let his stats tank while he tries to get the groove back in net, OR throw whoever the poor backup is out there to get murdered while we plummet through the standings.... 😬” We don’t have that problem right now, because the backup is... actually good? Oh my god, the backup is actually good! Thank fuck! We’re not doomed. If I’m Ducharme, I put Allen in net for a few consecutive starts to put a solid backstop behind all my fun experiments I’m probably planning with the skating roster (to catch their slip-ups, while also giving Carey lots of time and rest with which to work hard on sorting out whatever his issue is along with the goalie coaches).
2b: Jake Allen exists and is competition. Hell, if I’m Ducharme, maybe I even play a little hardball and say “Look, Carey, I don’t want you to be an expensive benchwarmer, but if things don’t pick up soon I am going to start whoever is doing best and you will have to compete for that net.” Related to my last point, when was the last time Carey Price had to push himself to compete for net time against anything other than his own injuries, and wasn’t simply always the default starter? Has that EVER been a thing? Honestly as much as I love the idea of him being The Goalie for the Habs, I also kinda like this idea a lot because I think it could really push him to a higher standard of performance. Maybe that kind of high-pressure situation (given how much he thrives in the pressure-cooker of the playoffs) could be what he NEEDS in order to Be Carey Price again. Worst comes to worst, he doesn’t respond to that challenge, and I am very sad but the Habs have a good goalie in net anyway, because Hallelujah, Jake Allen exists! God, isn’t it nice to have Jake Allen? Bless him.
3: Money. Guys, this league is so broke right now. Seriously. Seriously. Nobody has any fucking money. The Habs probably have more money than most teams, and that does not help when it comes to offloading large contracts. Trades are a NIGHTMARE both because of the flat cap but also because travel is complicated (especially cross-border) but also nobody wants to trade within their division if possible because all your games are against them. Who in the name of fuck do you think is jumping at the idea of taking the $10 million per through 20-lots-and-lots-of-years-from-now contract of a goalie who is currently struggling, impressive past record aside? What kind of astral plane of fantasy hockey are you on to think there’s a trade out there for that within this season. Shut up. And no, don’t bring up the expansion draft, this post is a rebuttal SPECIFICALLY to the people who think that Price and his contract are the biggest problem that needs to be dealt with RIGHT NOW and first on the list of ways to immediately remedy the team’s struggles.
4: Spite. Specifically to piss you off, bud. You personally.
5: Knowing how to troubleshoot properly. Fellas, if my computer is running slowly and freezing up a lot, do I immediately decide the first step to fixing it is to crack open the chassis, remove the hard drive, and try to sell that hard drive to someone to see if I can enough money back to somehow get a better hard drive for less? No, dipshit. That’s not how troubleshooting a complex system works works. It’s the same with hockey teams. Ah, my star goalie is not performing great. This situation is deeply less than ideal. If you’re actually good at troubleshooting, the first thing you do is not “WELL. I GUESS WE’LL HAVE TO THROW THE WHOLE GOALIE OUT. HE’S TOAST.” The first thing you do, if you’re a smart coach, is you say “Okay, what are my defence doing in front of him? What are they doing to reduce the amount and quality of our opponents’ scoring chances? Oh. Oh, they’re taking a lot of penalties, and... oh, uh, some of this is very not great. Yikes.” And then you start your work by trying to make the defence actually work instead of running the same Pairs That Everyone Is Very Much Over And Tired Of, because your goalie is actually supposed to be your Last Line of Defence. And maybe during that time you give more starts to Goalie Who Is Absolutely Slaying It, so that when you start trying new D-pairs and they inevitably have some mistakes, it doesn’t immediately turn into an Oh God Holy Fuck moment every time, because that last line of defence backstopping them is solid. The reason you need to deal with defense first is because a) You know you have a reliable goalie (Allen) in your pocket right now if you need him. What you don’t have is a whole-ass proven and tested and practiced Backup D-Core you can swap into the roster in front of your goalies to make their lives easier. Fix your defense and it WILL improve your goalies, even marginally. Defrag the hard drive before you ask why it’s not working. and b) If you need to go looking for any new D-men to solve the issues, those are WAY easier and cheaper to find than top-tier goalies, and you always want to start any troubleshooting process with trying the simplest solutions first to hopefully save time and money. The better that D-core is, the less it fucks your team over if the goalie isn’t feeling themselves, because the D is going to stop more of those pucks before they ever even become the goalie’s problem. FIX. DEFENCE. FIRST. Then try to train your goalie back into top form. THEN explore your other options.
6: The vicious cycle. Guys. We literally do this once every year or second year. EVERY time Carey Price has a slump, this fanbase gets into a tizzy like the Bell Centre is burning down and he was the one with the matches. And what ALWAYS happens literally within the year, every single time? He gets his mojo back like he did last summer in the bubble and goes on a heater and everybody goes “JESUS PRICE!!!! 🙌” and is ready to name their firstborn kid after him. Until eventually that performance becomes unsustainable, and he becomes mortal again, and suddenly he’s The Real Problem With This Franchise once again. I know he’s the guy they chose to build the team around instead of a superstar forward, but oh my god folks. You’d think he was the only player on the team. Guys, I feel like fucking Sisyphus pushing a blue blanc et rouge boulder up Mont Royal once a year with this shit. This man’s entire career has been a constant seesaw narrative between “Carey Price is our saviour!” and “Carey Price should be exiled to Nome!!!!” from parts of this fanbase, I swear. Look, slumps suck, but for once we are actually lucky enough to be in a position where this team, for the first time in YEARS, does not solelylive or die by the inscrutable magical cycles of Carey Price’s goalie powers — because when he has to step back and work to get back into his groove, there is FINALLY a SECOND GUY who is GREAT. Honestly, given that the state of this team for so long has been “they will go as far as Carey Price can take them” and he has put in a pretty fucking decent job of it despite all of the team’s other struggles, I feel like it is owed it to the guy to be like “Okay, well, we have somebody else solid to fill the net right now, and a chance to really figure out our defence and special teams with this new coach. Why don’t you take a step back and work your ass off at trying to get back into the form I know you can still perform at, and we’ll go from there?”
Anyway. Some parts of this fanbase have been waiting for a fresh excuse to claim Price is overrated, washed-up, and to blame for all of this team’s flaws and ills ever since he signed that contract, if not since the start of his NHL career. Just unreal how nasty some of this fanbase is willing to be about a player who is ON. YOUR. TEAM.
Am I saying he is beyond critique of his play and can do no wrong and his contract is perfect? No! I want this team to have the best goaltending it can get, and I want them to kick ass and take names. The difference is, I still believe Carey Price is a part of that winning formula, and I also think Twitter is overflowing with idiots who just repeat what everybody else says. He’s still a better goalie than your ass would be if I stuck you out there to stop shots from Mark Schieffle, for crap’s sake.
“The first thing that has to go is Carey Price’s contract 🤪”. Shut the fuck up. You are actively making other people stupider by talking. Go eat sand. Good day.
#It’s Time For My Opinion#I put so much time into this I hope it’s coherent lol#habs#Carey price#montreal canadiens#long post
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Here you can read all the stories of our second round and check out the artwork our participants have created! Thank you to everyone who was a part of this, be it as a writer, author, beta, reader, cheerleader or helping hand! Thank you so much everyone and we hope we’ll see you back for the next round! ♥
Without further ado, the BCBB 2019/2020 creations:
Wayward Sons by Substiel (Explicit, 29k)
Illustrated by bees0are0awesome
It's the year 1919 and the Wayward Sons are the most powerful criminal organization in the country. It's ruled by Dean Winchester who bares the Mark of Cain. A curse given to him when Mary Winchester made a deal with the Devil to save her dying son. Dean was always a cold blood killer who did everything for business, and he never let anyone into his heart. He didn't dare let himself get too close to someone. That was until the Roadhouse hired a new bartender.
Castiel always admired Dean from afar for helping the lower class have a voice. For some reason, the bartender knows how to get under Dean's skin. There was something different about him which led to the beginning of their newfound relationship. Two broken souls finding each other in the middle.
Archive Warning: Graphic Depiction of Violence
Art Masterpost / Fic Masterpost
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My Bloody Luck by TaymeeLove (Mature, 16k)
Illustrated by Kamicom
Castiel was a struggling actor who never had luck on his side in life or his relationships. He met with an accident and his life was never the same after. Will his luck in relationships turn around this time?
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Metanoia by adestielable (Explicit, 24k)
Illustrated by Noavice
Castiel’s existence has been nothing but pain, humiliation, and degradation. He’s an omega in a world where omegas are objects for an alpha’s enjoyment.
After a brutal assault on his nineteenth birthday, Castiel began entering into beastie fights—matches where instead of people going head to head, bio and mechanically engineered beasts fight to the death. And in Castiel’s months of fights, he’s not lost once.
It’s after one of these fights where Castiel meets Dean, his supposed true mate. Castiel hates alphas, and has vowed never to let one into his life because all alphas do is inflict pain. Yet…Dean is different. And Castiel finds he can’t help being drawn to him.
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
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Profound Kisses by BENKA79 (Explicit, 20k)
Illustrated by Gio (sketching-fox)
Dean knows he's screwed. He discovers he is in love with Castiel in Purgatory, and now he can't even have the angel in front of him, because he knows it's a one sided love. It’s Valentine's day and Dean tries very hard to hook up as always, but he can't get Cas out of his mind. So he drives back to the motel, drunk, and he finds Castiel trying to help him. Then, when Dean asks Castiel for some experimental kisses and the angel accepts, Dean starts a very dangerous game… finding in Castiel's kisses the most delicious experiences, but also, his own perdition. Will Castiel fall in love with him? Or will he stay emotionless as always?
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Sparks by DragonSgotenks (Explicit, 20k)
Illustrated by VampyRosa
Omega Cas meets Alpha Dean during one of the worst weeks of his life. Sparks fly when they realize they're truemates. But after a wild and intense night that ends with both of them sporting new mating bites, could a simple misunderstanding tear the new couple apart before they even have a chance to begin?
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Lesson Number 1: Monsters are Real by blueye22 (Explicit, 20k)
Illustrated by kuwlshadow
When Anael "Jo" Novak goes missing during a hike in the mountains with her boyfriend, worried brother, Castiel, goes in search of her. Castiel is surprised to receive the help of FBI agents, Dean and Sam. But what are they hiding?
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence
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You At the End of the Rail by spnsmile (Explicit, 30k)
Illustrated by verobatto-angelxhunter
Dean receives a text message from a new human Cas telling him of his suspicion that angels have found him in Gas n Sip. Still filled with guilt for kicking the ex-angel out of the Bunker, Dean steps up to make it up to his friend. Worried, Dean concludes the ex-angel has to disappear for many days so he asks Cas where he wants to go.
Cas’ answer?
Trains.
Fucking trains.
Archive Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence
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On Your Knees by raths_kitten (Explicit, 14k)
Illustrated by angeltortured
When Dean gets the assignment to follow the Fallen Angels on tour and write a feature article on them, he isn‘t their biggest fan. But that quickly changes when he hears them play live - and meets their charismatic lead singer Castiel in person.
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Just Like in the Movies by noxsoulmate (Explicit, 46k)
Illustrated by lotrspnfangirl
In a world where a new mark appears whenever you fall in love, Hollywood sweetheart, Castiel James, is known for his unblemished skin. Oh, he has the faint shadows of old crushes and childish infatuations, but no mark is that of something deep and true. No mark has ever stuck, no mark has ever become more than a hazy outline. Because Cas, well... Cas has never been in love.
The skin of bookshop owner Dean Winchester, however, tells another tale entirely. Dean loves freely, quickly, and deeply. He loves his family, he loves his friends, he still cares for his exes. While the first two don’t show on his skin, the latter do. All brushed over his body in various shapes and forms and colors. Of varying clarity. But even Dean has yet to get that one mark. That mark that sticks. The mark that is so deep, and so sharp, and so clear, it can only be that of a profound bond.
These two men share a common hope; a common desire. That one day, they might have a mark that means they have found a love that is as deep and true as love can be - just like in the movies.
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Granted by Andromache_42 (Explicit, 20k)
Illustrated by agusvedder
At forty-one, Dr. Castiel Novak is the proud recipient of a generous grant to fund his project on sustainability and urban farming from the Campbell Foundation, a small investing firm based out of Chicago. The night before he meets the award committee, lonely and pushed by his friend Balthazar, Castiel has the best sex of his life during a casual Grindr hook-up with “just-visiting” forty-seven-year-old Dean. Castiel’s life appears to be coming together, until he discovers that Dean is the head of the grant award committee. For the sake of professionalism, Castiel is willing to ignore the intense attraction between the two of them, but Dean turns out to be too tempting to resist.
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Finding Bigfoot by Desirae (Explicit, 22k)
Illustrated by Tamapochi
“Don’t be such a worrywart. It’s vacation time. Campfires, fishing, beer. What’s better than that?”
“Apparently a sasquatch sighting?” Castiel snarked, with an arched brow.
“Well, yeah. I mean, Sam’s a good substitute, but it’d be nice to see the real thing,” Dean grinned.
Finding Bigfoot wasn't exactly on the itinerary when Dean, Cas, and Sam planned their annual boys-only camping trip, but with his brother in a noticeable funk, Dean was prepared to do what he had to do. Even if it meant keeping quiet about a long-waited love confession from his best friend.
Determined to stay focused on distracting Sam from his troubles, and not make him feel like a third wheel, Dean and Castiel decide to keep their new relationship status to themselves, until after vacation is over.
After years of mutual pining, that shouldn’t be too hard, right?
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Meet me at Sunset by Suus_Arido (Mature, 55k)
Illustrated by celstese
Ever since the Barrier of Melaina fell and plunged the worlds of men, monsters and magic together, the Republic Elohim has kept its citizens save with help from the hunter organization the Red Circle.
Dean Winchester has never known how the world looked before the fall of the barrier. He and his family have been part of the Red Circle for generations and he knew it was his faith to die in battle. All he is supposed to want is to protect the innocents from darkness. But how can he when his soul is dark and corrupt?
As the monsters start to adapt and become more intelligent, the rise of chaos is not far behind. It’s midst this chaos that Dean meets a human with the name of an angel. Not only does this man believe in the salvation of the world but he also seems to believe that Dean is redeemable as well.
A love story may perhaps develop but Dean knows better, for it is known that the faith of a hunter is tragedy. Will Dean be able to make the right call? Even when blue eyes turn unrecognizable?
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
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Beyond Borders by xHaruka17x (Explicit, 53k)
Illustrated by Diminuel
Sometimes doing what is right, what feels right, doesn't mean you’ll escape the consequences of those actions. Dean Winchester is the Head Alpha of one of the largest packs of the Western Hemisphere. He is days away from being a married and mated Alpha, ready for the next chapter in his life to commence, only for a horrific accident to change everything. Adam, Dean and Sam's little brother, is killed in a car accident across the globe in Russia. Dean finds out his little brother's now widowed Omega is all alone and pregnant, left to the mercy of his horrible home pack. Dean makes a decision and he knows things will explode when he gets back home, but he knows in his heart it’s the right thing to do.
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The Cleric's Birthright by Scribo_Vivere (Explicit, 34k)
Illustrated by yoyo-deano
Castiel Novak lost his husband and the love of his life, Balthazar, three years ago in a slaying no one has been able to solve. Burying himself in his work at the university as a leading anthropology professor there, he attempts to put the past behind him. When vicious murders begin to plague him in an eerie replication of Balthazar’s death, Castiel decides to find out on his own what sort of evil has descended upon them all. But the answers he’s looking for may not be so easily found, and the revelation forced upon him could destroy everything he knows - about himself, his world, and the faith he once held so dear. Complicating things is his new relationship with Dean Winchester, who may or may not be what he appears. Why is Castiel inexplicably drawn to him like a moth to the flame?
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
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To Soar Without Grace by QuillsAndInk (Explicit)
Castiel is an alpha and a cleric serving the gods of his kingdom and wielding their power in preparation to join a holy war. When he gets taken by the heretical high prince of a rival kingdom, Castiel knows his fate is sealed. That is, until prince Dean tries to persuade him to take on a mad quest to kill his father and end the holy war. With heretical magic Castiel can’t understand forcing him away from the gods he’s always served, Castiel joins Dean. But in the mountain wilderness in the dead of winter with only his sworn enemy for company, can Dean and Castiel get past their differences or will the war swallow them up.
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
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Cow Bells and Snow Globes by Pimento (Explicit)
It really doesn't matter what the gossip columns say. Dean knows the International Ski Champion Castiel Novak, aka, Casanova of the Slopes is actually just Cas. Loyal, kind, caring Cas. The same Cas he's absolutely not had a crush on since they were teenagers on the competitive circuit.
He's had two plus decade's practice at hiding his feelings, how difficult can it be to suppress them a little longer.
They just so happen to be in the same ski resort, at the same time for an entire season, so Dean is damn well gonna enjoy having his friend back in his life for a while and not screw it up. The fact that he seems to have the magic touch with the grumpy teenage daughter that Cas is trying so desperately to reconnect with is just an opportunity to ease his friends' troubles while he finds his feet again.
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