#and is willing to be ruthless about them
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I'm sure this has been talked about already as it's fairly obviously, really, and not to re-open the wound, but I did want to get this out and I had to calm down some to do it I guess lol. But the thing about Alicent's character assassination in the finale is the utter stupidity that, in addition to everything else, it undermines the show's own oh-so-belabored messaging. Like, the scene where Aemond removes Alicent from the council and, to a lesser extent, where he tells Criston that Alicent is a fool for holding love for their enemies, are framed by the show like "oooh looook, misogyny!!!" ExceptâŚhe's right?? He was right all along, as it turns out??
Effectively, Aemond pegs Alicent early on as someone who is too hesitant, too emotionally involved with the enemy, too unwilling to lock in for their side. This makes her unreliable. Not because she's a woman, but because anyone like that would and should be considered not reliable enough to be trusted with sensitive war secrets. In that context removing her from the small council makes sense as she presents a liability. And I guess the show may have meant to say that the reason she gets judged like this by the men around her is because they see her gender paired with her feminine urge desire for peace as inherent weakness⌠But then the finale goes and proves Aemond completely right. She was a liability. She went and betrayed everyone because sheâŚidk couldn't get over her girlhood love for Rhaenyra? Didn't have the stomach for war? Whatever. But the point is that there's no way those scenes can be read in good faith as "oooh sexism" in light of the finale, even though the show really wanted them to be just that.
#now it's just wow Aemond has good instincts#and is willing to be ruthless about them#hotd#aemond targaryen#alicent hightower#op
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Dark enchantress cookie redesign
#I've been thinking about her recently#my only knowledge of her is from kingdom so thats the only version i know but she actually seem pretty empathetic all things considered#i mean she raised velvet and keeps members of the cod that probably hinder her progress [COUGH COUGH licorice and poison muchroom COUGH]#dont get me wrong i like them alot and i think the are sweet but for a while i really didn't understand why she kept them around because of#the way all the cookies talk about her charater#she would seem verry tough love or just ruthless but in actuality she just keeps adopting these weird cookies she finds#she also knows what they are good at and plays into those strength. pome is good at keeping things organized. Mushroom is good at#keeping others guard down. licorice is willing to work hard to succeed at any task given#choco is good at fighting and keeping his team safe. she clearly knows them fairly well and also sometimes supports the stupid stuff they#want to do#i would say pome is more ruthless then dark enchantress herself#anyway i have more thoughts about her but I'll save them for a later time. thanks for reading ig ^^#dark enchantress cookie#dark enchantress crk#crk#cookie run kingdom
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Screaming from the rooftop:
It's time to stop calling the paragon/renegade system a morality system! I argue that it's a reputation system that has been for too long mislabeled.
#mass effect#a friend is playing through the series for thw first time and him commenting on paragon/renegade choices got me thinking about this again#like of course it doesn't make sense that people can magically tell you have enough good/bad points to listen to you when you say something#but if you've curated a reputation as someone who is willing to talk it out of course people are going to believe you when you want to work#things out peacefully#and vice versa if you've proven to be ruthless in the past they'll know your threats actually have teeth to them#also binary morality systems are just bad
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I could count the amount of original stories of mine that don't have horror elements on one hand and idk what that says about me
#thylacines can talk#actually i do know it says mmmmm making horror monster ocs is fun#outside of my fandom ocs my ocs and original stories arre dominated by horror elements and religious themes oopsie daisy#i might eventually post about them but the hk brainrot is going strong#but a friend of mine got a commission for me of my doomer human x monster yaoi so you'll see my Main Babygirls soon đĽ°#hand in unlovable hand they're fucked and weird and it's an unhealthy relationship and it'll never work as everything is stacked against#them yet each other is all they have and if being together means their death then so be it. Peter should have probably ran. Should have left#would be better off for the majorth of the story had he never met it yet the two are so alike. it's the first thing that's ever unnderstood#him. it's the first 'person' that's ever truly cared for him. And even if it has flaws and his life was ruined by things beyond his#comprehension and he risks his life he's not willing to let go of the only person whos truly seen him and loved him. Who is willing to tear#its world apart and die for him. There are no happy endings here. They were doomed from the start. But at least they have each other.#also tfw your life and 'family' sucks so much that a literal monster who manipulated you and used your body to carry out ruthless murders is#nicer to you than your goddamn brother and friends. like damn dude.#I honestly think if Slaughter was born a human their relationship would be great for both of them they truly fit together like two puzzle#pieces. two outcasts who have so much in common and find comfort in one another. but because of the circumstances of Slaughter's nature and#what it was forced to be this is not a healthy situation or a relationship. Peter comes out better at the end and would be as good as dead#if not for meeting Slaughter so there's a silver lining in all of this but goddamn dude. the bullshit it took to get there.#The fact that his life was so bad literally getting possessed by a monster and almost being murdered numerous times and an insane amount of#trauma and bbeing a target for monsters for the rest of your life literally IMPROVED IT my guy truly cant catch a fucking break đđ
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I've reached a point where I'm not just like "ew men amiright" I'm genuinely just like these things are dangerous. They're killers. I have negative interest in them. I'm no longer seeing it as just a matter of being hurt by them and being angry. I feel nothing but a combination of fear and disinterest. Like one would have of spiders or snakes. They're creatures.
#i was just stalked and harrassed by a man and its snapped me into this ruthless sense of grounding#nothing i can say on here really matches the pain and psychological torment men commit daily#we live amongst demons willing to lie to our face and jerk off to our rape behind our backs#i feel like i need to change how i speak about them becuase theyre creatures i cant even fathom being human
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âż
bold for things i could definitely see or want, italics for things i could see or am unsure of and striked out for things i donât want or cannot see.
FRIENDSHIP.   childhood friends / work buddies or coworkers  / family friends / friends with benefits / smoking buddies / adventure buddies / fake friends / recently friends / party buddies / friendship of need / dying friendship / circumstantial friendship / partners in crime / old friendship /[your muse] is the good influence /[your muse] is the bad influence /[my muse] is the good influence /[my muse] is the bad influence / opposites attract / ride or die / frenemies  / roommates or flatmates / penpals / exes to friends / enemies to friends  / other
ROMANCE.   childhood sweethearts /[your muse is mines] childhood crush /[my muse is yours] childhood crush / exes / exes to lovers / forbidden lovers / highschool sweethearts / secret relationship / opposites attract / long distance / unrequited [from your muses side]/ unrequited [from my muses side]/ unrequited [from both sides]/ skinny love / friends to lovers / enemies to lovers / spurious relationship / power couple  / newly entered / soulmates [ metaphorical ]/ soulmates [ literal ]/ awkward / turning toxic / toxic love / cheating [on your muse]/ cheating [with your muse]/ other
FAMILIAL.   siblings [half]/ siblings [step]/[my muse] is an older sibling figure to your younger sibling figure  /[my muse] is a younger sibling figure to your older sibling figure muse /[my muse] is a parental figure to yours /[my muse] is a child figure to your muse / guardian figure / legal guardian / adoptive child / foster child /[your muse] is taken under mines wing /[my muse] is taken under yours wing / other
ANTAGONISTIC.   dangerous to each other / dangerous to others / unpredictable / rivals / petty / developing into sexual or romantic tension / based off family matters / based of off circumstance / based of professional matters / based off misunderstanding or lies / conflict of ideology / betrayal / hero - villain dynamic / enemies / fight club / friends turned enemies / lovers turned enemies / exes turned enemies / otherÂ
#thcdoomed#ANSWERED.#(i gotta say; i kind of adore how almost down to earth Dronia's tale is; an unlucky soul swept up by the horrors of fate)#(just seeking to live a normal life with the one she loved)#(overall? i think they'd get along very well with the spats between them being over methodology as Valerya is more prone to ruthlessness)#(Valerya is also willing to be a bit more unscrupulous; even when she's trying to do genuine good)#(versus the CG nature of Dronia whom i imagine tries to avoid such things where she can)#(but i think Dronia would be very appreciative of Valerya helping her and not being judgmental of her condition as a dhampir)#(Valerya and her would get along on a down to earth level; drinking buddies that talk about life at like 4 AM)#(those vibes; plus adventuring pals with their distinct classes!)#(hehehe; i like them! ty for sending! >:])
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Scenes when the "no clear priority in car development and on track strategy will most definitely win us the wcc" philosophy proves to be so successful you almost end up 3rd in constructors instead
#hilarious things that should have happened just for the laughs#ah there's always this year lads#things some people might not want to hear is i do not think this team actually has any drive to win in general#and not necessarily because of some grand conspiracy that can't really be proven anyway but this new management seems too obsessed with#the whole image of no accountability culture and all that this entails to do the necessary procedures#that will put them on the same level as their competitors who are willing to be much more ruthless and cutthroat about it#my 5 cents to the#diskhorse
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20 Compelling Positive-Negative Trait Pairs
Here are 20 positive and negative trait pairs that can create compelling character dynamics in storytelling:
1. Bravery - Recklessness: A character is courageous in the face of danger but often takes unnecessary risks.
2. Intelligence - Arrogance: A character is exceptionally smart but looks down on others.
3. Compassion - Naivety: A character is deeply caring but easily deceived due to their trusting nature.
4. Determination - Stubbornness: A character is persistent in their goals but unwilling to adapt or compromise.
5. Charisma - Manipulativeness: A character is charming and persuasive but often uses these traits to exploit others.
6. Resourcefulness - Opportunism: A character is adept at finding solutions but is also quick to exploit situations for personal gain.
7. Loyalty - Blind Obedience: A character is fiercely loyal but follows orders without question, even when they're wrong.
8. Optimism - Denial: A character remains hopeful in difficult times but often ignores harsh realities.
9. Humor - Inappropriateness: A character lightens the mood with jokes but often crosses the line with their humor.
10. Generosity - Lack of Boundaries: A character is giving and selfless but often neglects their own needs and well-being.
11. Patience - Passivity: A character is calm and tolerant but sometimes fails to take action when needed.
12. Wisdom - Cynicism: A character has deep understanding and insight but is often pessimistic about the world.
13. Confidence - Overconfidence: A character believes in their abilities but sometimes underestimates challenges.
14. Honesty - Bluntness: A character is truthful and straightforward but often insensitive in their delivery.
15. Self-discipline - Rigidity: A character maintains strong control over their actions but is inflexible and resistant to change.
16. Adventurousness - Impulsiveness: A character loves exploring and trying new things but often acts without thinking.
17. Empathy - Overwhelm: A character deeply understands and feels others' emotions but can become overwhelmed by them.
18. Ambition - Ruthlessness: A character is driven to achieve great things but willing to do anything, even unethical, to succeed.
19. Resilience - Emotional Detachment: A character can endure hardships without breaking but often seems emotionally distant.
20. Strategic - Calculative: A character excels at planning and foresight but can be cold and overly pragmatic in their decisions.
These pairs create complex, multi-dimensional characters that can drive rich, dynamic storytelling.
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#writing tips#writing advice#character development#writers on tumblr#writeblr#creative writing#fiction writing#writerscommunity#writing#writing help#writing resources#ai assisted
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youtube
"- I have a lot of problems with Biden. He is clearly the better of the two options, which I recognize is a very low bar. Being better than Trump cannot be the standard, because Donald Trump is the absence of a standard.
"But the truth is, even if Trump looses, that won't be the end of this. The people who cooked up Project 2025 will just move onto Project 2029 instead, because for them, this is so much more than just one election, or indeed, one candidate. Project 2025 is born from impulse as old as America. It's an impulse that says one class of Americans is entitled to lead, and the rest of us are lucky to be allowed to serve- that thinks there should be a limited government when it comes to rules they have to live by, but also a unitary executive to keep the rest of us in line. These are old, old ideas that have been shouted from podiums-... but have now been placed into a new handbook for an only too willing president to use on day one.
"And in a perfect world, I would love if we had an opposing party better able to articulate a strong defense of our country's ideals and that also consistently lived up to them. People are entitled to hope for more from the next four years than someone just not being Trump (and for at least two supreme court justices to die)-...
"And for anyone tempted to think, 'Well, we survived Trump's first term,' first, not everyone did, and it should hopefully be very clear by now a second Trump term really does promise to be far, far worse, because if Trump's first term was defined by chaos, his second could be defined by ruthless efficiency. That should be troubling to absolutely everyone because Project 2025 is a movement who's members joke about wanting a white homeland and insist women have to have more babies to uphold western society.-
"We need to be better than this."
-John Oliver, June 19th of 2024
#Youtube#john oliver#last week tonight#LWT#biden#trump#2024 elections#I also cannot stress this enough- if you are only voting on how America is treating the rest of the world#in light of the Palistinian genocide- know that Trump has pledged even more money and military support to Israel#That Trump has pledged supporting Russia in their invasion of Ukraine#and that Trump also wishes to have closer ties with North Korea#If America's treatment of all other nationalities and parties is your primary issue - then please also consider these#(And not voting at all does not absolve you of your part in this election)#(choosing not to participate is still making a choice- and does not absolve you of your contributions to the outcome)
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How to Write a Ruthless Character
A ruthless character is all about the endgame. They donât care how they get there, lying, cheating, using others, itâs all fair game as long as they win. When writing them, show how they can cut off any distractions or emotions, making decisions that others would hesitate over.
These characters don't let feelings get in the way. Compassion, guilt, regret? Nah, they donât have time for that. Show how they can turn off their emotions and make choices purely based on logic. Theyâll do things that seem heartless to everyone else, but for them, itâs just another part of the plan. Itâs not that they donât feel anything, they just choose not to.
Boundaries? What boundaries? A ruthless character doesnât care about rules unless they can bend them to get ahead. Theyâll do things no one else dares, crossing lines others are too scared to even approach. The more uncomfortable their actions make people, the more it emphasizes just how far theyâre willing to go. For them, pushing limits is just another day.
They donât act on impulse. Every move they make is planned, and every risk they take is calculated. They weigh the pros and cons before acting, and theyâre always three steps ahead of everyone else. Writing a ruthless character means showing that theyâve already figured out how to win while everyone else is still trying to figure out the rules.
Betrayal is their go-to move when things get tough. Friends, allies, even people who trust them, no one is safe. Theyâll turn on anyone if it benefits them. And the best part? Theyâll sleep just fine afterward. Show how others react to their betrayals, shocked, hurt, furious, while your ruthless character shrugs it off like, âIt had to be done.â
if you have any questions or feedback on writing materials, please send me an email at [email protected] âđť
#writing#writerscommunity#writer on tumblr#writing tips#character development#writing advice#oc character#writing help#writer tumblr#writblr
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im mourning mnh a little bit because i was rly looking forward to her character when she was first introduced but by now if you ask me to say something about her personality (so not even delving into her role in the plot, which i guess will at least have something to do with military action towards the end) im not sure what i can say :< in the beginning, her will being suppressed seemed like a cool plot thing, and she was clearly fighting back against the wedding tournament in her own way, but since then, we really haven't seen her exercise her own will to do much of, well, anything except question mcs about being lin shu and crying...and now she's just... the past love interest who visits him now and then and helps him do exposition of the plot by asking questions. im waiting for her to be delivered from plot shackles so she can exercise her will, please
#nif watching#the advantage and disadvantage of a drama like this#is that the Main protag really is a mastermind pulling all the other protags along the Plot#plot which is principally of his making#it feels a lot like mei changsu's big chess game against all the antagonists#which is why i now also have huge expectations for liu mintao's character concubine jing#at some point u need the protags' wills to be interacting with each other#the advantage of the plot is of course that it can be huuugely complex#and having it all be designed by the Main Protag elevates pretty much everything about him from his determination/motivation to#his ability and passing by the stakes for him#it makes it seem like the responsibility in his hands are huge and it contributes to making him seem so ruthless#since everyone else are at the end of the day moving forward on the chess board under his general guidance#yes you can say that he doesn't force them#but so far there has been almost no real conflict with his guidance yet from the protags#not since prince jing's rule-laying post the concubine yue incident#there are advantages and disadvantages#but not a drama-killer in any case because the plot is still interesting#and most characters are still interesting enough
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(am just going to link back to this post for anyone who wants to read. the rest of my thoughts on this au asjdkgh)
anyway I love that this au has lowkey became my new setting to just. explore jiang ziya/arjuna dynamics with each other (and with oberon but that's irrelevant to this post) completely separate from what fgo's doing. bc right now I can't stop thinking about arjuna and jiang ziya taking Months to even begin to trust each other enough to talk about their respective relationship insecurities bc a) slow to trust and open up on both ends and b) not wanting to expose the other to their more 'flawed' aspects yet
[more thoughts in the tags as always bc for some reason I keep rambling there lol]
#lulas's randomness#fate based vr world au#arjuna has his usual struggles with the more human side of him (the side he deems not as 'heroic') but jiang ziya also has like#general reluctance to give his trust freely + concern that given how shiny arjuna's reputation is he would be :/ about the more unsavory#actions jiang ziya did in life (as well as the fact that he's still perfectly willing to be ruthless in this life too)#(like as much as I like to imagine jiang ziya as wanting to do the compassionate thing when he can I do#also have to keep in mind that both in history and fsyy he's. p ruthless lmao)#so I guess basically similar concerns on both sides but it takes a while for the other to know#but once the trust is built enough to talk about it it makes their relationship stronger imo#something something ultimately getting to really Know your partner is better than knowing only the seemingly idealized#side of them something something#jiang ziya#jiang ziya (fate)#taigong wang (fate)#taigong wang#arjuna#arjuna (fate)#fate series
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There's something about the tmagp characters' motivations, and who they're willing to sacrifice, and how the people or things they prioritise act towards them, and how it goes for them.
Because
Celia is willing to sacrifice Sam, who loves her and who she genuinely does care about, to stay with Jack. And then there's a moment where she isn't sure she can go through with it, and she loses him anyway without having to act, and she'll probably never know exactly what choice she would have made in the end, even though she's consciously planned this for weeks.
Alice straight up abandons Teddy and Colin, who are both Not Doing Well, when they are explicitly asking her for help, to go and protect Sam, who has told her not to come after him. It's barely a decision for her - she quite clearly stops thinking about anything or anyone else.
Sam finds out that Celia betrayed him and STILL puts himself in danger to protect her. And ends up falling through the gap to another world, which is exactly what she was planning to do to him.
Gwen throws Lena under the bus the moment the opportunity comes up, purely for the sake of her own ambition, which is part of a broader pattern of decisions. And it's immediately obvious when she gets what she wanted that it's only going to go badly for her.
Idk idk it's the love and the need and the want of it all, and the ruthlessness that can come out of it, and the way they make or don't make their choices, and the consequences of it aaaaaa
#tmagp#tmagp spoilers#tmagp 30#the magnus protocol#samama khalid#alice dyer#gwen bouchard#celia ripley#h
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Benign
Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Reader
Summary: Marrying a former Soviet sleeper agent was your first mistake. Letting curiosity get the better of you and saying his trigger words before sex was your second.
Warnings: 18+. DUBCON - Bucky is partly brainwashed; R is reluctant at first. Reliving past trauma (i.e., grief, prior HYDRA captivity). Rough, unprotected p-in-v.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5
Marrying into the mob meant one of two things: turning a blind eye to your husbandâs crimes or taking them up as your own. Most of the women who had gone before you chose the former, leading lives of willful ignorance while their spouses cut deals, shed blood, stole guns, and submitted only to the laws of secrecy and discretion.
You, unlike those wives, hadnât had the luxury of choice.
Your life, unlike theirs, had been sold to a man you didnât know, by a father you couldnât stand, and now your dad was dead, and this manâyour husbandâwas to blame.
The least Bucky could do was fuck you hard to say sorry.
But no, ever since the Winter Soldier had reared its ugly head that dreadful night in Madripoor two weeks prior, your husband hadnât laid one finger on your body that was not soft, sweet, and sickeningly apologetic to you. He seemed almost scared to initiate sex, and when he did, couldnât help but act like a touch might break you.
After all, one almost had. Those hands heâd hear you beg and plead to put on you now were the very same ones heâd used to kill dozens, if not hundreds, including blood of your own blood. To the world, Buckyâs reputation commanded fear. To his wife, now, he felt duly obliged to prove he was moreâthat you were safe with him, not from him. Heâd carted you off to every GP, hematologist, nutritionist, and grief specialist lauded among Brooklynâs elite to make that happen. Fast. Frankly, these days, the thought of fucking was the furthest thing from his mind.
Unbeknownst to Bucky, somewhere along the spectrum of grief, youâd already come to settle comfortably at the âNeed-to-be-fucked-until-I-can-no-longer-think-or-feelâ phase, and every bone in your body was crying out for respite in the form of ruthless, mind-numbing sex. It didnât make sense. You hardly knew what to do with it. You should have lashed out, shut down, cried rivers and lakes of tears for that integral part of family that had been lost, but for whatever reason, you had to go numb.
You wanted to do something really, really fucking dumb.
Remorseful as he was, Bucky and his explanations for who or what the Winter Soldier was had been sparse. Heâd told you that he had once been held in captivity by HYDRA, had his brain re-wired some way to make him a merciless Soviet sleeper agent, and that the night in Madripoor was the first in ages he had been âactivated.â How did activation happen? Of course, he wouldnât tell.
But Steve would.
Steve had told you everything you wanted to know about your soldat, describing in painstaking detail how he worked, trained, operated, and could be called to action. You were almost certain Rogers had said it all as a way to assure you that it wasnât Bucky whoâd killed your fatherâit was someone inside him. You were more than positive Steve had never intended for you to use his intel like this.
You hadnât believed him. Couldnât believe him. How the fuck could someone sever all ties to their conscious mind and just transform anew into a killer? You got to be hell-bent on knowing for certain whether itâd been Bucky or him, it, whatever the hell the Winter Solider was, and on knowing it now. If your husband was faking it all and simply using this persona to justify the killing, that would be it. Trust gone, marriage over. If he wasnât, wellâŚyou hadnât gotten that far into your own line of thinking.
âTell me what you want, doll,â Bucky said, pulling you back to the present.
He shifted gently against you, cotton trousers raising the friction a little as he slotted between your legs. He was still dressed head-to-toe from his meeting that morning.
âI want you to fuck me. Make me cum. Please.â
You were bare, save for one small scrap of linen and lace that somehow passed as a nightie. Your gaze was soft.
Bucky didnât want to say no, but he also felt too guilty to say yes. The way you were watching him now, eyes so helpless and pleading, body writhing for contact, he knew you didnât want his touch so much as needed it. Desperately. Couldnât bear to be burdened with grief so you brushed it aside, to the furthest recesses of your mind until all that was left was desire. Starvation, really.
He could satiate you for now, but that hunger might not ever leave. The corners of his lips twitched into a frown.
âGentle?â he mumbled.
âRough,â you countered.
âBabyââ
âI really donât need another fucking lecture on death, Bucky. I know Iâm not myself right now, but I can still make these decisions, okay? Donât talk to me like I canât.â
Anger flashed in your eyes for a second, then indignation, then nothing. Without much energy left, you pushed him away. Flopped back on the bed and, seeming to sink into yourself, heaved a low, feeble sigh.
âI know. Hey,â Bucky leaned over to press a touch to your tummy, and it made you want to hurl, âIâm sorry.â
You turned onto your side.
âYou still donât remember what happened?â
The question came suddenly, almost from somewhere outside your body, it seemed. For the hundredth time.
âNo,â Bucky answered, for what felt like the thousandth.
âThis Winter Soldierââ
âHe isnât me.â
âYou didnât know?â
âCouldnât know. WasnâtâŚprogrammed for it.â
Bucky was watching you now, eyes as contrite as theyâd ever been while you rehashed this subject to the brink of tears. He never could stay composed when he saw you cry.
âBabyâŚâ he started, arms reaching out for you.
Eyes still filling with tears, you shook your head and swatted him off. You sat up, and your brows pinched together in a look he couldnât read. Contemplating.
At last, you made up your mind.
You would try something newâand really, really stupid:
âZhelaniye.â
âWhat?â
Buckyâs own expression contorted with uncertainty.
ââsemnadtsat, rzhaviy, rasvetââ
He heard that. He immediately wished he hadnât.
âWaitââ
You were curious. You had no idea what you were doing.
âBaby, baby, stopââ
ââpech, devyatââ
You were speaking so fast, surely it wouldnât work like that. Either way, he had to stop you. He seized your arms, giving a sharp, deliberate shake, pupils blown to the size of saucers in his eyes. There wasnât much time.
âDonâtââ
ââadinââ
No time at all.
ââdothisdonâtfuckingdothishoneyplease.â
Losing himself already. Feeling it stir inside his mind.
ââdobroserdechniyââ
âKind-hearted.â âBenignâ. You truly had no clue what these words were liable to do, much less what they meant.
Having enunciated this last part, you swallowed. Took the tip of your tongue and rolled it left-to-right across the backs of your teeth, waiting for your speech to take effect like some magical performance before your eyes.
It hadnât, it seemed. You blinked. He blinked. You sat in a protracted silence for what seemed like seventeen years, and presently, your stomach began to churn. Nothing happenedâyouâd been right about this fuckery all along.
Then you remembered one last word of the sequence.
Faintly, you said:
âSoldat.â
The man above you straightened. Sitting. Stiff. Still perched by your legs at a comfortable distance but regarding you now with a pointed stare. Expectancy made manifest in a simple, sharp glare from his eyes to yours.
â...Bucky?â
The look on his face grew even harder. For a time, he persisted in that strange and silent grimace, and just when you started to suspect he was faking this whole demeanor of deadened stoicism, you heard a voice. Clawing out of his throat but sounding nothing like him:
âWho the hell is Bucky?â
The words drove a fear to the greatest depths of your bones, and you hardly knew why. You stared back at the handsome, barren man still watching you with severity, and you couldnât seem to find your husband anywhere.
âJames?â You werenât sure why you tried his name again. You just didnât know what else to say.
The scowl seeped into his mouth, and he frowned.
âJames,â he repeated, like the word was foreign to him.
You found yourself shuffling back on the bed just thenâto what, you didnât know. You just felt a gnawing need to put some space between you and this person, this glowering face, however you could. When he grabbed your ankle, you let out a startled sound, and when he followed you up on the bed, you did more than just whimper; you lifted your leg to knee him directly in the stomach. He caught it.
Then he stared again, expression bloodless and wan.
âYouâre scaring me, Bucky.â Your voice trembled as you tried to free your leg from his fistâgrip unusually strong.
The man paused another moment, if only to soak in your words and let his gaze trail over your face. Your exertions did not register. And, for the very first time, you felt as though you were something more like a plaything in your husbandâs eyesânot a full-fledged human being but a system to be gamed. The feeling was so unsettling that you had to turn away.
Or try to, anyway.
Craning your neck just far enough to spy your phone on the nightstand, your first thought was Steve; he would know what to do. But before you could even think to twist and lift your body in that direction, you felt a hand yank you to the bed, flat on your back. You looked up at Bucky and found yourself caged between two arms. He lowered himself to his elbows, shifted his weight to one side, and seemed not to notice your movements at all when you tried to slide away. The man just splayed his hand across your stomach and pressed it firmly. Stay.
You werenât one to shy away from a challengeâor keep hope alive against the odds. You put your hand over his.
âJamesââ
âZhena.â
The abruptness of Buckyâs word stole the rest of yours. You cocked a brow and followed his gaze to your hand.
To the gaps between your fingers, then the touch that fanned across them to settle on one digit in particular.
Bucky thumbed at the diamond and smiled. He smiled.
âZhena,â he repeated.
You blinked.
âIâ you...gave me that, Bucky. You did.â
He hummed in acknowledgment.
Bucky stared at the ring for what couldâve been five seconds or several years, and then he did something unexpected. He shifted his touch to the bodice of your dressâagain, if you could even call it thatâand he began to tug at the satin bow situated between your breasts.
Of course, this nightie being designed for honeymoons and supremely easy access, it didnât take much effort at all for the folds of your dress to come apart. Your breasts spilled out of the fabric without so much as a hint of protest, your torso was quick to become fully exposed, and suddenly, shortly, your hands were fumbling at your chest in an effort to regain some smidgen of modesty. Your husband just shook his head, following your hands.
âMoya zhena,â he said, a touch more emphasis and fervor to the first of the two words.
Now it was you who was shaking your head. Trying to pry his touch away as you slid up the bed. When he followed, you saw the icy expression had been supplanted by intrigue and, though you still felt ill at ease, you couldnât deny you were curious to know what he was thinking. Who was thinking it? Soft, plush lips swiftly replaced his hands, and before you even knew what he was doing, Bucky, or someone, was latching onto your left breast. Using teeth to graze the hardened nub and send a ripple of thick, guilty pleasure coursing through you.
You whimpered. Bucky groaned.
Your fingers slotted through his hair with every intention of pushing him away, but when you tried, he just flicked his tongue and made another delicious sound against you.
You pushed with even more force, and he groaned again.
Not Bucky, not Bucky, not him, you have toâ
âStop!â you cried.
A set of soft, warm baby blues darted up to meet you.
Some flicker of recognition seemed to cross them, too.
âHoney?â
You almost lurched toward the sound. It was Bucky.
Suddenly, your hands were making fists in the collar of his crisp white button-up, and you were trying to yank him up. You murmured his name in disbelief, relief, and gathered him up in your arms to pull him in for a kiss.
The lips that met you were soft for a momentâjust one.
Then the teeth reappeared. Harsh, jarring, biting. You jerked back at the sensation, and when you found his face again, it seemed your husband was lost to you all over. The eyes were attentive stillânowhere near as cold and aloof as they had been beforeâbut they did not radiate the same warmth and admiration that Buckyâs always did. You almost couldnât believe what you were seeing. He was gone, just like that, and there was nothing you could do to stop it from happening.
A broad palm cupped your cheek to bring you in for another kiss, and you werenât sure if you should indulge. It didnât seem you had much choice anyway, because the lips that were seeking yours were hungry. Starved. Searing into your mouth with a force you couldnât refuse.
But something inside you wanted to find Bucky again.
Somewhere inside this stranger was lying dormant a trace of your husband; youâd seen it yourself, if only for a second. It made you curious. Where had he gone? What did he do when forced to retreat into this strange, preprogrammed being, and how could you get him back?
âBucky,â you mumbled, more of a plea than a moan.
You were kissed harder than you had been in a long time. You didnât have to think, or do, or breathe one puff of air that this man didnât account for. His tongue wedged a gaping space in your wet, welcoming mouth for him to fill, and somehow, you didnât feel the urge to protest. A familiarity in the way he kissed almost put you at ease, and when his body lifted slightly, yours lifted with it.
Before long, Bucky was sitting. Kneeling between your legs with an eye to your soft, shaking torso. Youâd barely even come to notice just how hard you were breathing until you felt a palm on your stomach again. There was an oddly calming insinuation in that one simple touch.
And again, he smiled. Brighter than before.
âNashe?â He sounded eager as he said it.
You peered up at him and raised an eyebrow in question. Perhaps you shouldâve felt more exposed; after all, you were sitting half-naked with your husbandâs assassin alter ego stroking your stomach and beaming over you, eyeing you expectantly, and you didnât know what to say. Apart from the short set of words Steve had taught you, you were totally clueless to Russian, and you werenât quite sure you were in a place to ask Bucky to translate.
When it seemed words might never come, the gleaming teeth above you were shrouded in a tighter, close-lipped smile, and Bucky nodded. Appearing to understand. Instead of forcing a response from you, he just let his hand migrate down your belly, fingers tracing the skin, then settle comfortablyâmomentarilyâat the crest of your pubic bone. Then he pressed the heel of his palm into the place residing right below it, and without really meaning to, you moaned. A quiet maelstrom of pleasure circled low in your abdomen, threatening to draw noises from your throat you werenât planning to make with every gentle gyration of Buckyâs lower hand.
You had to purse your lips to contain the sounds.
Again, he nodded.
âItâs okay,â he said, so quiet he almost couldnât be heard.
He let the friction continue for a while like that: just palming you, watching you react to the simplest of motions against your swollen, aching clit and try not to writhe. At length, you squirmed a little bit. Bucky seemed to want to wait for something to happen, and when you bucked your hips, a look in his eye said that was enough.
He lowered himself between your legs. Shoulders bumping your thighs as he spread them apart, chest rising and falling in measured breaths, and lips smiling all the while. You sucked in a breath when his face came to rest just a few inches shy of your bare, aching warmth.
âBucky?â
The man looked up at you and blinked.
âYeah, honey?â
One thumb traced over the seam of your cunt, and your back nearly arched off the bed. There he was, again, gaze safe and secure to yours and hands moving in tandem as they always would. His tongue calmly followed suit. When you fisted his hair, he blinked once more and then directed his attention back to your wet, warm, velvety folds with a pointed look and a purpose.
The sound that escaped you next could hardly be classed as anything less than a scream, but the soft and unperturbed demeanor of the man between your legs showed he hadnât noticed at all. He just sucked diligentlyâdamn near dutifullyâon your clit with a vigor youâd never felt, and when you yanked at his hair, he hummed.
It was like his lips had been trained for perfect suction; that was how well and thoroughly he descended upon your swollen little bud. An airtight kiss and a quick flick of his tongue, paired with his hot and heavy breaths fanning over your cunt, sent your senses into overdrive. Your toes curled inward, your throat let loose a gasp, and without fully realizing it, your walls were clamping down, pulsing and leaking out desire for more of this touch.
Then, without warning, Bucky brought a hand to the throbbing and slick cunt that was presently clenching around nothing, and he fed it two fingers. So forceful and deep he nearly buried his knuckles right along with them. Then he started scissoring those two fingers, sharply.
âOpen, milaya,â he said. Again, it wasnât entirely Bucky.
But you felt a faint remembrance there. You didnât want him to stop. Maybe you were led astray by the gentle laps of his tongue or the prodding of his fingertips, or perhaps there was something stubbornly familiar about the way he was touching you now. You couldnât tell.
All you knew was that both of your hands were holding tight to his head and begging him, wordlessly, for more.
Your moans rang all the way through the bedroom in your new, far-too-big penthouse apartment in Brooklyn, down the hall, reverberating through every inch of the space until all that could be heard were your sounds and his and the delectable little noises of your bodies working together. Bucky hadnât even stirred to pleasure himself.
You wanted that part to change.
With your hip pinned to the mattress and Buckyâs tongue laving over your clit in ruthlessly quick movements, you probably wouldâve liked to cum all over his mouth and fingers, but you wanted to see him pleased even more.
Just when heâd worked a third finger inside you and was driving you close to your peak, you pushed him away.
Bucky parted from your folds with a glistening chin and two furrowed eyebrows, clearly frustrated to have been torn from his mission before you reached completion, but you wouldnât let that look linger for long. You used your leverage in his hairâhowever slight, comparatively, that grip might have beenâto pull him up on the bed.
Bucky surprised you with just how swiftly he moved.
His steel-blue gaze was on yours in a second, equally penetrating and soft.
âWhatâs the matter?â he asked.
âNothingââ
âMy baby okay?â
He surprised you again; this time by how quick his demeanor was to shift the second he sensed something was wrong. Just like Bucky. It had to be him in there.
You nodded, still out of breath from the wonders heâd been working with his tongue. You squeezed his arm and tried to coax him toward you, to help him lower his body some, and when he seemed uncertain, you offered a smile. Itâs okay to touch, you wonât break anything.
Bucky eyed you skeptically, but it was clear he was more wary of himself than of you. He glanced over your body, briefly to his, then slowly, apprehensively, sank down.
âJust fine,â you mumbled, hooking your legs around his back the second his chest was close enough to yours.
You felt an uptick in his heartbeat when your heels dug a little more firmly into the waistband of his pants. While your hands started working their way toward the front of that fabric, wedging clumsily between your bodies, his gaze flitted to yours, and his brows drew even tighter together. He didnât try to stop you, but he certainly seemed confused as to why you wanted to include him so soon. Why you cared to show concern for him at all.
You noticed that then, and in just about every moment preceding, the man was taken aback by kindness.
Whether it was pulling him closer to you, tugging his pants down with a tender touch, running your fingers across the bulge in his boxers, or simply nodding your head and letting him know it was okay to touch you back, Bucky seemed unaccustomed to any care in this area.
When your fingers made it around his cock and started stroking him, gently, he just mightâve come apart.
His chest shuddered with the inhale of a short, strained breath, and his eyelids fluttered, as if meaning to close.
Buckyâs jaw clenched, and he started to shake his head.
âNo, let meââ
âLet me,â you finished for him, wrist flicking back and forth quietly. You paused just to rub a quick touch between your folds, collect some arousal, then return to touching him when he met your eyes again and allowed you to continue. You skimmed his sensitive underside with your palm and let the warmth of him bleed into your fingertips as you worked him up to a comfortable pace.
Bucky rutted into your touch, probably harder than he meant to. Then he planted a hand beside your head and anchored his weight above you so that he was close enough to reach your lipsâbut he didnât kiss you.
His expression hardened again, and he forcibly removed himself from the pulse of your fingers. He frowned.
âYou want me to fuck you, no? Make you cum?â
He sounded irritated again.
Briefly, you recalled your words from earlier and nodded. It was true, youâd said it to him like that, and youâd meant it. You just couldnât make sense of what he wanted now.
It seemed Bucky couldnât wait to indulge you any longer. He fisted his cock in one hand, angled the head just outside of your cunt, and burst in with one thrust.
âThen let me,â he muttered, plunging down to the hilt.
The first go was rough, and the second was no kinder. Buckyâs face screwed up with indifference again, like he wanted to get something out of his brain and just do.
Like there was a task at hand that needed to be finished.
You couldnât deny it felt fine at first. Fucking edifying after all those horrific thoughts had been eating away at your mind and rousing your own hunger for numbness. The drive of Buckyâs thick girth in and out, in and out repeatedly was no doubt capable of rendering you dumb. But being slammed into and taken so roughly was only good for you when you knew he was feeling good too.
This Bucky was back to being entirely flinty and lifelessâpractically devoid of all emotion as he railed into you.
The back of your head was forced into the pillow with the weight of each thrust and Buckyâs thumb pushing into your chinââBetter, milaya? Is this better for you?ââand frankly, you wanted to push him back and ask the same.
But you couldnât. The pace heâd set was suffocating, and the stretch of his cock inside you was unusually tough.
Instead, you sank your nails into his arm and mumbled:
âBucky.â
The man��s thrusts were both stabbing and rhythmic, sending a welt of pleasure blossoming up in your chest. You tried again:
âBucky.â
He blinked.
And slowed.
âBucky,â he mumbled back.
Seemingly mindless and mechanical, he snaked a hand behind your head to lift your face and tilt it toward the sight below: his cock splitting you open before him, parting your insides with an easy, welcome glide through the slick of your folds. You watched as your arousal enveloped him fully. Not a single inch of his rock-hard, throbbing shaft was spared; even his balls were soaked. They felt even heavier slapping your ass with each thrust.
âYou remember?â you asked, hating how small you sounded.
The manâs nostrils flared, but he gave a curt nod. Expression taut and vigilant, as though anticipating something going wrong at any second. Still, he nodded.
âYears,â he answered.
âYears?â
Since heâd done this? Felt good? Become this way?
No, Bucky was activated in Madripoor just weeks ago. He didnât look like he was ready to indulge in any âfeel-goodâ pleasure, and you werenât sure when heâd last been with anyone else before you. Years could mean anything.
You chanced a few soft fingertips up to his cheeks, cupping either side of his clean-shaven face in an effort to anchor you both to one place. The pit of your stomach was reeling with warmth, and friction, and fullness. It took everything in you just to pull him in for a quick, grounding kiss before the feeling gave way to even more.
Buckyâs teeth nicked your bottom lip. He flinched back.
You ignored the sting and repeated his name, murmuring it carefully up to the seal of his mouth as if requesting entry with that word alone.
It seemed to work. Bucky kissed you back with a gentle, albeit guarded, sort of tenderness that made him soften. His thrusts werenât as rough and punishing as they were before. The dull, throbbing ache between your legs transformed into something sweeter, and your body no longer had to brace itself against strokes that, to you, were nearly bruising and, to Bucky, were just necessary.
For once, your husband let out a soft grunt of pleasure.
âThey never let us,â Bucky said as his teeth grit together, âItâs been years.â
âSince what?â
The face above you tempered moreâthis time with a trace of sadness behind it. He continued to rut into you, but now his thrusts were sloppy, and it seemed as though he were battling against his own pleasure with every motion. He lowered one hand between your legs and began to thumb at your clit, gaze torn from yours.
âClose now?â he muttered.
Ignoring the question youâd asked.
âYears since what?â you pressed anyway. The tiny ripples preceding bliss had already begun to stir inside you, maddeningly, with every flick of his thumb, but your curiosity to know the whole truth was stronger still.
Buckyâs hips were moving at a feverish pace now; his free hand made a fist in the sheets beside your head, and his chest heaved with a series of short, ragged breaths that were no doubt meant to mask his moans as well. Notwithstanding the burn you felt between your legsâhe really was much rougher and stronger now, you sawâyou cupped his cheek again to tilt his face toward yours.
What you saw made your stomach drop.
Your heart clenched like a fist within the confines of your ribcage, and there it wasâthat terrible ache you felt each time you saw something awful materialize before you.
Buckyâs eyes were wet with tears. He wouldnât blink.
He tilted his head into your touch, as if for support, but really, the weight of it signaled to you that he just wanted to feel you. Be assured that you were there. His big, broad arms seemed suddenly unable to hold his weight, and then he sank into your frame with a grunt and another stuttered breath. Like he was ready to collapse.
âDonât leave again,â he said quietly.
The pain in your chest elevated, in bloom.
âBucky I didnâtâ wasnâtââ you started to say.
The friction between your bodies was almost too much to bear. You couldnât be sure if you were talking to your husband, soldat, or some strange, inconceivable mixture of the two, but you could tell that this one was desperate.
Pleading.
âI canât lose you again.â
The head of his cock grazed your most sensitive spot inside, and a whine seeped out through your teeth. Buckyâs whole body was blanketing yours, torso flush with your front and hips working an erratic cadence as he got a glimpse of release himself. He groaned out in pleasure and begged you to stay. You promised that you would. Your legs were still wound around his sides, but both of your bodies were slick with a sheen of sweat; it was hard to hang on. Buckyâs hair was wild and pushed back from his face, but his eyes were clear when they finally met yours, and you heard him mumble again, âPlease stay.â
You didnât know what else to say but okay, baby, I will.
You swore you would stay, and in between oaths, your mouth was consumed by a barrage of kissesâBucky got to feast with a full set of teeth again, primal as everâand then your climax hit. Euphoria washed over you whole with a force you werenât expecting to feel, and you couldnât help but cry out and whine as waves of pleasure coursed straight from the innermost depths of your core.
Buckyâs hips collided with yours in two more stuttered thrusts, and when he bottomed out at the last, you felt a heavy spurt of warmth. A groan coiling out of his chest. Muscles growing lax and two sturdy arms coming to bracket your head as your husbandâs whole body weight went folding into yours. You kissed some more, in between frenzied intakes of breaths and steadying moments where you were simply trying to ground your body and get your heart to slow down to a normal rate.
You held each other in silence for a while. Buckyâs head fell next to yours on the pillow when the last of his spend had been emptied, but otherwise, he didnât stir. At some point, his hands slid behind your back, and the second he hugged you to him, you felt secure in that embrace.
You were probably as far as youâd ever been from understanding who the fuck your husband was, but all it seemed you were capable of feeling for now was pity.
Pity for the years heâd lost to captivity; pity for what was little more than mere existence under HYDRAâs thumb; pity for all the things you still didnât know about his past.
You held Bucky tighter, and, flooded with this strange, grating emotion and an overwhelming sense of powerlessness, you wished you could protect him, too.
âJames?â you mumbled into his hair.
Bucky didnât respond.
You squeezed his shoulder. Still nothing.
Against your better judgment, you tried to shift yourself underneath his body. You figured you wouldnât make it far at all, but at least he would be aware that you were trying to get up. Maybe even start to move with you.
He didnât.
It took everything in you just to wedge an elbow back, struggle to prop yourself up against his weight, and when you were about to let out a huff of an exasperated laugh and tell him, Bucky, youâre crushing me, honey, could you please ease up a little, your request was answered before the words could even leave your mouth.
At the sound of two new muffled voices carrying up from the living room and what appeared to be noises from shuffling feet, Bucky rose straight from the bed, off you.
Your gaze trailed his to the door, and you reached for him.
âBaby, itâs justââ
Bucky was back on his feet. Yanking his boxers and pants up his legs and buckling his belt in no time at all.
The movers. Itâs just the movers bringing in furnitureâ
You moved your hand closer to your husband in the hopes of stalling his movements for half a second, but then a set of ruthless blue eyes had you pinned, quick:
âStay.â
Your outstretched arm was taken up in a much stronger, stiffer one, and you were suddenly pulled over to Bucky.
But you knew from the eyes it wasnât him at all.
And you werenât so much being tugged toward him as you were being hauled to the floor. Thrown on your knees beside the bed, next to Bucky. He was about to leave.
Without thinking, you reached for one of the legs of his trousers and sank your nails into the fabric to hold him in place, to tell him again that there was nothing to see out there but the people you knew, no threat outside at all. But Bucky was deaf to your pleas, it seemed. He shrugged you off easily and made a move for his gun, expression blank, stolid, calm, hardened. Decided.
You tried to rise to your feet but were stopped.
âSTAY,â Bucky boomed again, this time an order that he didnât even deign to complete with a look your way.
If he hadâif he even possessed the ability to consider anything but the immediate task at handâhe wouldâve seen his own hand knock you to the floor to keep you from standing. Mightâve caught a glimpse of the instant your head struck the edge of the nightstand before you hit the ground. Couldâve even made out the first traces of blood that came trickling out from above your temple. Wouldâve seen you cower back, viscerally, out of fear.
But holding the side of your head and watching him leave, grim realization twisted at the pit of your stomach, and you knew the man wouldnât have stopped if he had.
If your soldatâs objective was to protect you from any harm lurking outside that door, real or illusory, nothing you were capable of doing now could stop that. At expense to yourself, at expense to him, at expense to whatever lives stood between the Winter Soldier and that unwavering, hardwired goal, he still would not ever stop.
Thinking of new, innocent lives in the balance, now, you scrambled for your phone the next second to call Steve.
You tried him once. Twice. A third time crawling on your knees, then standing, then staggering over to the door and pulling the phone from your ear just to send a string of texts to your friend while the thing continued to ring.
SOS
Need help
Pick up please
Buckyâs stuck and heâs
About to hurt people here
A crash sounded outside. You hurried to the door. Your hand closed around the knob and tried to turn it. The handle turned freely, but something behind it was refusing to let you leave the room. You pressed again.
âBucky!â
Your cry was useless in the face of the barricade outside.
You pushed your shoulder and, behind it, the whole force of your weight against it anyway, trying to get out.
The line went dead. You tried again.
Now with your phone to one ear and the bedroom door taking the brunt of your hits from the other, bleeding side of your body, you scarcely heard much of anything else. The ring started. Stopped. Began again when you pressed a shaky finger to Steveâs contact name, and continued in a cycle for some time while you tried to force whatever was on the other side of the door away.
The second a voice broke through the haze of your frantic, half-crazed state of consciousness, you cried:
âSTEVE!â
âMrs. Barnes?â
You were shocked to hear a woman on the other end. Your pulse was still racing, shoulder aching from the impact of each desperate push youâd been forcing against the door, and then you stopped. Another loud something sounded down the hallway, further away, but you were too startled and unnerved to take any note of it.
You started to ask, âWhereâs Steve?â when the voice continued:
âThis is Mrs. Barnes?â
âYes,â you answered woodenly.
You held the phone as close to your ear as you could, but still, the womanâs words were coming in and out in bursts. You mustâve mistakenly accepted the call when trying to reach Steveâyou couldnât think right now; could barely retract the phone far enough to see a strange number displayed on the screen. You swallowed.
ââfrom Lenox Hill Hospital at Northwell Healthââ
The high-rise medical center on the Upper East Side youâd visited that week. Bucky had wanted you tested for nutritional deficiencies and anemia, of all fucking things.
ââif you had a moment or two to chat and maybeââ
No, you needed Steve, not this outpatient courtesy call.
You wouldâve liked to hang up. Shouldâve hung up. In fact, your fingers were practically itching to hit the button the whole time the nurse was speaking to you, but something in you just couldnât be persuaded to do it. It took several more seconds before your senses began to creep back, and by then, when you were about to drop the call, you heard a phrase that stopped you on a dime.
ââbut the doctor advises prenatal vitaminsââ
âWhat?â you snapped, far more harshly than you meant.
The nurse paused a beat, whether from incredulity at how rude youâd just sounded or to consider something. When she resumed, she sounded a little more guarded.
âYesâŚDr. Watkins did reach out to you about your bloodwork from your last visit, didnât she? I thoughtââ
âNo,â you said, rushed and painfully brusque, again. You tried to rein in your tone some before continuing, âShe didnâtâdidnât reach out about anything. What vitamins?â
Another pause.
âPrenatals.â
You hated that she gave you another second to chew on that word before taking a breath and pressing on.
âIâm terribly, terribly sorry to be the one to spring that on you, Mrs. BarnesâI thought you knewâŚumââ The nurse was sheepish now, almost embarrassed to be speaking, ââyouâre aboutâŚthree weeks along in your pregnancy.â
Three weeks along.
Advised prenatal vitamins.
For the child growing inside of you.
A rivulet of blood trickled into your left eye.
Your whole body was apt to convulse, but it didnât.
You hung up.
â
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#bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#marvel#mcu#mob bucky barnes#marvel smut#marvel x reader#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mob bucky#mafia!bucky#mafia bucky barnes#winter soldier#winter soldier smut
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everytime i think about kath for too long especially when considering the wider picture im like. ngeremes plastik
#shes so. chews on railing#she was best friends with eve and aaron. she killed aaron. she fought in a rebellion to overthrow a tyrant. she became an empress after.#she adopted reza liz n nia n genuinely shes them as her children. she was barely a mother. she never knew what having caring parents felt#like. liz never knows what having a mother would even feel like. she wants desperately for nate to see her as a mentor and parental figure.#she killed his dad. she made his mother a widow. she killed aaron. she killed aaron. she killed her own best friend.#she never unlearns the ideologies her parents taught her despite spending years fighting a tyrant. she wants to protect the world from#anymore harm. she goes about it by subjugating territories after territories under her own rule. she thinks herself a reluctant villain.#she thinks herself a hero whos the only one capable or even willing to do what it takes.#ugh. ughhhh. i dont even hate her. i dont exactly Like her either. idk#shes a character for the narrative at least. i dont need to feel one way or the other for her.#though funny thing about her character is that her unresolved issues was catastrophic on a global scale and xu's canon is basically#so DEEPLY ENTRENCHED with and can NOT be separated from the consequences of her actions. like everything that happens every series of#important events every character dynamic every characters MOTIVATIONS the absolute CORE of the narrative conflict and every important#character is so deeply deeply a result of her actions. and she doesnt get much screentime as the rest of the cast. lol#we only get to her in part 3. which is arguably maybe the second most appearances of every parts. 4 and 5 shes basically relegated to side#character. part 6 shes there for the Final Confrontation. she gets more screentime but it doesnt actually mean much because every non-main#character gets more screentime because part 6's allllll about the conflict being bigger than xander flip and ari. so honestly despite being#the main antagonist. arguably everything that happened a result of her. shes actually kindaaaa akddmfoslor.#maybe because xu is more about interpersonal connection than anything else. meeting halfway meeting as equals. and kath has made herself to#be no ones equal. the top of the top. cool. detached. suave. charismatic. ruthless. nonchalant. egotist.#not your mother. despite wanting so so bad to be one. not your friend. despite being so so lonely and missing older times.#in a way she rlly does encapsulate xu's core theme and conflict. connections of equals vs isolations of hierarchies. and she is the highest#of all. so she must be the most isolated of all.#idk. everything is ur fault girl. u couldve had a better life. your best friends. maybe therapy before deciding 2 become a mother of three.#and yet it couldnt have been any other way. because u couldnt have been anyone other than kath.#and maybe theres some form of tragedy in that
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Innocence
18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}
{Daemon Targaryen X Reader} It is your wedding night and your new husband has a reputation for being ruthless, violent and cruel. You know nothing about sex, but that doesn't stop him from making you his wife in every sense of the word.
3.9k words - Warnings: smut, angst, virgin!reader, Daemon teaching sex, oral sex, breeding kink, size kink, soft dom!daemon... & lots of wine
âĄâĄ Tag-List âĄâĄ
{Daemon Targaryen Tag-List}
@elijahstwink @starshipcookie @absolutemarveltrash @odairtrqsh @darkened-writer
@cheneyq @fallout-girl219 @nina6708 @evasmlp
You stood in front of the fire, your arms wrapped around your body as you stared into the flames, willing yourself to stop crying. The wedding had been perfect, but now you were left to do your wifely duty and consummate your marriage and the very thought made you shudder.
You knew nothing of men, of their desires and the marriage bed, and all you had heard about Daemon, your husband, was that he was rough and wild in all things, and this included the bedroom.
Your stomach rolled with nausea at the very thought. You had heard the horror stories of virgins, the blood and the pain, the tears. You were smaller in stature than most and your mother had warned you that the pain would be intense and unbearable.
When your lord father had arranged the marriage with the Prince you were both shocked and frightened. He was such an imposing figure at court, tall and broad, with strong arms and a sharp jawline. His eyes were violet and they held a darkness in them that made you feel as if he could read all your thoughts and secrets.
The wedding and the feast afterwards felt like a blur and all you could think about was getting away from everyone and the impending dread of the marriage bed. You had watched him across the room, laughing and joking with his brother, and then with the ladies who were vying for his attention. He had a certain swagger and cockiness about him that had you feeling even more on edge.
A quiet knock on the door of the bedchamber pulled you from your thoughts and you jumped, wiping your eyes and sniffing. You were sure you looked a sight and the thought only made you cry harder.
"Come in," you whispered, keeping your back to the door, and when the door creaked open you heard the many footsteps of your new handmaidens.
"Let's get you undressed my lady," one said softly, and she began to remove the pins from your hair, while the others worked on removing the ornate dress.
They were all new to you, a gift from your new husband to help you settle in, and you had only just met them this evening before the wedding. Your old handmaidens had been sent home and you missed them terribly, needing their advice now more than ever.
The new handmaids continued in silence, and the longer you were left alone in your head the more panicked you became. Once your dress had been removed and you were in just your shift, you took the goblet of wine one of the girls handed you, drinking down half the contents, hoping it would calm your nerves.
The girls continued their tasks, removing your jewelry, the remaining pins from your hair. Leaving you in just a thin satin shift that barely covered your body.
You stood awkwardly, fiddling with the fabric in your fingers, looking down at the ground and biting your lip.
"Shall we remove the shift, my lady?" One of the girls asked, and you felt your stomach drop, bile rising in your throat. You could feel their eyes on you, assessing the situation.
"No," you choked out, and the girl frowned at you. "I-I would prefer to keep it on."
The girls shared a knowing look and gathered your wedding gown, curtsying to you and bidding you goodnight. When the door closed, you let out a heavy sigh and walked back towards the fireplace, finishing off your wine, and staring once again into the flames.
It felt like hours had passed, and the silence of the room was deafening. The sound of your breathing seemed louder than ever, and you could hear your own heartbeat, the blood rushing through your ears.
You kept drinking the wine, hoping it would calm your nerves, and before long you had consumed two full goblets. Your body was beginning to feel warm and the edges of the room had begun to blur.
You were feeling light headed, and a little dizzy, and when the door finally opened and your husband entered, the room spun a little. You closed your eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath, and you felt his warm hands wrap around your waist.
He hummed as his mouth pressed kisses to your neck, his beard scratching your sensitive skin, and you leaned into him, his body radiating heat.
"Why aren't you undressed?" he whispered against your neck, he reached up and took the goblet out of your hand, taking a long sip and then placing it back on the mantelpiece.
"I-" you faltered, your cheeks burning, and he turned you around to face him. His large hands were resting on your waist and he looked at you with curiosity.
He guided you over to the nearby chaise and pushed you down onto it, and when he sat down beside you he began pouring a fresh goblet of wine.
He handed you the glass and watched you take a long sip, and you could see a hint of a smirk on his lips. He knew you were nervous.
"Tell me why," he said quietly, taking a sip from his own glass and you shrugged.
"I don't wish to take the shift off," you admitted, and he chuckled, taking the goblet from your hands and placing it on the table beside him.
"I know you did not wish for this marriage, but it is the way of things," he said, his voice was surprisingly soft, "but if it's any comfort, I do not intend to mistreat you."
You nodded, perhaps it was the wine or the warmth of his body, but the tension in your shoulders was easing a little.
"May I ask you something?" you whispered, and he raised an eyebrow, his mouth quirking.
"I suppose," he said with a small smirk.
"What's it like?"
"What's what like?" he asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.
"The marriage bed," you said quickly, your cheeks burning and you averted your eyes.
Daemon cleared his throat, a hint of a smile on his face. He knew you were untouched, but he had not expected this kind of innocence.
"The marriage bed can be enjoyable, especially if both people are willing and wanting," he explained, and you swallowed hard, nodding.
"And if they aren't?"
Daemon's gaze softened and he sighed, looking into the fire. He was no monster. He knew the reputation he had at court, and although a lot of it was well earned, he was not going to be cruel.
"Then it's not fun for either of us," he said softly, and your gaze flickered up to meet his. He looked almost sympathetic, his eyes not holding their usual mischief.
You bit your lip and shifted closer to him, your body seeking out the warmth he provided. He smiled and wrapped an arm around you, pulling you flush against his chest, his hand stroking up and down your arm.
"You are now under my protection, my little wife," he murmured against your hair, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "And I shall look after you."
You sighed and snuggled further into him, feeling safer than you had all day. The wine was helping to dull the edge of fear, and his touch was warm and gentle.
The conversation turned to other things, you both loved music and riding, and Daemon had a wicked sense of humor that had you laughing and blushing. You felt comfortable for the first time since you had met him.
You didn't notice his wandering hands, the way they stroked your thighs, your hips. You didn't notice how his lips grazed your neck, leaving soft kisses and nips. You were too focused on his words, the rumble of his chest.
"My little wife," he breathed against your ear, his hands slipping under the hem of your shift, and you suddenly stood up, moving away from him and wrapping your arms around yourself.
Daemon sighed, standing up and walking towards you. He cupped your face in his large hands, stroking his thumb along your cheek.
He reached for the straps of your shift, and began pulling them down your arms. Your hands came up automatically and tried to push them back up, and Daemon tutted, taking hold of your wrists and placing your palms on his chest.
"Stop it," he commanded, and the tone of his voice had you immediately obeying him. His hands resumed their task, pulling the straps down, letting the silky fabric pool around your feet.
You looked up at him with watery eyes, your cheeks flushed, and your arms covering your breasts. He cupped your cheek, his thumb tracing over your plump lips.
"Do not hide from me," he whispered, and your eyes dropped to the floor, a few tears escaping and running down your cheeks.
Daemon gently tilted your chin upwards and wiped away your tears. "Undress me," he commanded, and you looked up at him nervously, but nodded, moving your hands to begin untying the laces of his tunic.
He watched you carefully, his hands stroking your sides and hips, his eyes burning a trail across your body. When the last lace was untied, you slid the fabric off his broad shoulders, taking in the sight of him, the expanse of pale skin.
You had never seen a naked man, and as your eyes trailed over his body, you couldn't help the blush that heated your cheeks.
He was beautiful, the muscles stretched across his chest and stomach, and his arms were strong and defined. There was a dusting of hair on his chest, and a large scar across his shoulder and neck that made you reach out and trace your fingertips over the marred flesh.
He watched your face, amused by the look of innocence, enjoying how you explored his body with just a gentle touch.
"Do I meet your approval?" he smirked and you dropped your hand, looking away and blushing.
His hands went to your waist, his thumbs stroking the underside of your breasts, and his eyes followed their movements. He watched your nipples pebble under his gaze, the blush spreading across your chest, and he groaned softly.
"I need you to tell me what you like and what you don't," he said quietly, his breath tickling the shell of your ear.
"I-I don't know," you replied, your hands coming up to clutch at his shoulders.
"Then we shall have to explore, hmm?" he grinned, and then his mouth was on yours, swallowing your gasp.
He was gentle, his lips pressing soft kisses against yours, he was smiling as you tried to mimic his movements.
You were unsure where to put your hands, so they remained clutching at his shoulders, and Daemon chuckled, breaking the kiss and looking down at you with amusement.
He gripped your waist and lifted you up easily, your legs wrapping around his hips automatically, and he carried you over to the bed.
He laid you down and covered your body with his, kissing you slowly and deeply. Your hands were now roaming across his back, exploring the expanse of muscle.
When his lips left yours, trailing kisses down your neck, you were breathing heavily, your body on fire, a strange pressure building between your legs.
His lips continued their journey south, kissing the swell of your breasts, and he cupped them in his large hands, pushing them together and pressing soft kisses against your flesh.
He watched you as he ran his tongue across your nipple, and the sound you made had him groaning, his mouth sucking the peak into his mouth, his tongue swirling around the bud.
"Daemon," you gasped, the sensations were too much, and his name on your lips had him smirking against your skin.
He released the nipple with a pop, blowing cold air over the wet peak, watching the goosebumps rise, and the nipple pucker.
"It seems you like this," he chuckled, and he began to move to the other breast, giving it the same treatment.
You were panting, the pressure between your legs increasing, you rubbed your thighs together, trying to alleviate the feeling.
Daemon's eyes flicked down, noticing the movement, and he grinned, his hands gripping your hips, stilling your movements.
His kisses continued their journey south, his tongue trailing a line between your breasts and down your stomach. When he was about to reach the apex of your thighs, you shut your legs and grabbing his hair, trying to pull him away.
"What are you doing?" you asked, panicked, and he looked up at you, raising an eyebrow.
You had a basic understanding on how a man and woman make a child, but this act was something you had never heard of.
"I'm going to kiss you here," he murmured, his lips trailing soft kisses along your lower stomach, and your head fell back against the pillow, your grip loosening on his hair.
"I...I don't understand," you whispered, and he chuckled, biting and sucking on the delicate skin.
"You'll see," he promised, and his hands moved under your thighs, pushing them up and spreading them open, and you blushed, embarrassed and ashamed at how exposed you were. No one had ever seen you like this before, and your whole body was on fire.
You gasped when his mouth made contact with the sensitive flesh between your legs, his tongue flicking out and tasting the wetness. Your hands shot to his hair again, but instead of pulling him away, you pushed his face closer, moaning when you felt him licking a stripe up your slit.
His eyes were dark and hooded, and he watched your every reaction, enjoying how sensitive you were, how innocent. You were squirming and panting in his arms, your back arching off the bed when his tongue circled the small nub, sending bolts of pleasure through your body.
He held you still, keeping your thighs open, as his mouth feasted on you. You were writhing and gasping his name, and he was moaning against your skin, loving the taste of you.
You felt something building, something deep in the pit of your stomach, it was frightening and exhilarating, and you didn't know what was happening.
Your legs kicked, your hips bucking and you were moaning, the pressure increasing, and you were clawing at his head, his biceps, anywhere you could reach.
His large hands spread you open, his tongue circling your opening, pushing in slightly, and it was enough to have the coil inside you snapping, and you let out a loud moan, the waves of pleasure washing over you.
Your thighs were shaking and Daemon released his grip, letting you close them as you caught your breath.
You had never felt anything like that before, and when you finally opened your eyes, you were met with his violet ones, sparkling with mirth and a hint of smugness.
"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" he smirked, and he was kissing you again, and you could taste yourself on his tongue, a heady mix of sweetness and salt.
You kissed him back eagerly, your arms wrapping around his shoulders, and he chuckled, nipping at your bottom lip.
His kisses were more urgent, and when his lips began to wander again, you tugged at his shoulders, trying to get him to stop.
"Why do you still fear me?" he asked, his forehead resting against yours, and you shrugged, unable to explain why.
"I... I don't know," you admitted, and he grinned, his hand going between your legs, his finger running a circle around the small bud.
You gasped and jerked your hips, you were more sensitive than before, and his touch was making you tremble.
He smiled at your reaction, continuing his slow, gentle circles, "This is the source of all your pleasure," he whispered, his mouth close to your ear. "As well as here..."
His fingers moved lower, tracing the entrance to your sex, and you whined as he slipped a finger inside you. Your hands clung to his shoulders, nails digging into his skin, and he began to move his finger, slowly sliding it in and out.
"It may hurt a little," he admitted, watching your face carefully, and you swallowed hard, trying to adjust to the feeling. "But it will get better, and then the pain will fade."
You nodded, his words reassuring, and he pressed a kiss to your lips. He continued his gentle thrusts, watching your face closely, and when you were beginning to relax, he slid another finger inside.
"My sweet little wife," he purred against your ear, his mouth pressing kisses against your neck.
His thumb began rubbing slow circles on the nub, and you gasped, the feelings returning. You felt the coil beginning to tighten again, and your walls clenched around his fingers.
He smiled at how responsive you were becoming, how you were grinding against his hand, trying to seek out more. So shy and innocent, yet so desperate for him.
His hand withdrew and you whined, opening your eyes and glaring at him, but he just smirked, bringing his hand up to his mouth, and licking his fingers clean. You turned a deep shade of red, looking away, and he laughed.
He sat up, his fingers going to the laces of his breeches, and you watched, biting your lip. You had felt his hard length against you, but seeing it was a whole different experience.
Your eyes were wide and fearful, and Daemon couldn't deny that he liked how you looked at him. It was a mixture of awe, desire, and a little bit of terror. He knew how big he was, and the first time with him would not be easy.
"We'll take it slow," he promised, his fingers caressing your cheek, and you nodded, the trust in your eyes making his heart ache, he would try his best not to betray it.
He pushed his breeches down his legs, and kicked them off, settling his body between your spread legs, his large cock pressing against your wet sex.
You were trembling, and Daemon leaned down, pressing his lips against yours.
"Relax, byka ÄbrazČłrys {sweet wife}," he whispered against your lips, and you nodded, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath, your nails digging into his arms.
Daemon gripped the base of his cock, his other hand hooking your leg around his hip, and then he was guiding himself inside you.
You felt a sharp, burning pain, and you cried out, clinging to him. He kissed your cheek and whispered sweet nothings in your ear, continuing his gentle thrusts.
He was barely halfway inside and you were gasping, the pain too much. You tried to push him away, but he shushed you, his hips moving in a slow and steady rhythm.
His mouth capturing yours in a slow and deep kiss, a hand moving between you to stroke your little nub. You let out a soft moan and he smiled against your lips, his fingers stroking faster.
"That's it," he breathed, and he pushed forward, fully sheathing himself inside you, and you moaned, the pain fading as his fingers continued their movements.
He was still, his lips leaving yours and trailing kisses across your cheeks and neck. Your skin was pink, flushed, and you were panting, your hands still clinging to his arms.
He waited until your walls stopped clenching around him, and when he felt you relax, he started moving.
His movements were slow, careful, and his fingers never stopped rubbing slow circles. The pain faded, and as you grew accustomed to the sensation of being stretched, a new feeling began to build.
"There, not so bad, is it?" he murmured against your skin, and you shook your head, his thrusts getting harder, faster.
Your hands moved up to his shoulders, and his mouth captured yours in a deep kiss, swallowing your moans. He was moving with purpose, pressing himself against the spot inside you that had you seeing stars.
He broke the kiss, his eyes boring into yours, and you blushed, unused to having someone look at you like that. His gaze was full of lust and desire, and you couldn't look away, even if you wanted to. You were moaning his name, begging for him to go faster, harder, and he grinned, happy that you were enjoying it.
"Pleasure, you see, is a tool," he said, his voice low and husky, his eyes flashing dangerously. "It can be used to break or bind, and I am going to bind you to me, my dĹna byka ÄbrazČłrys {sweet little wife}."
His thrusts were punishing, and you were gasping, clinging to him for dear life. His mouth was hot and wet against your skin, leaving love bites wherever he could reach.
Your hands moved to his hair, tugging hard, and he groaned. You smiled at his response, tugging a little harder, and his hips jerked, and he chuckled at your aggression.
"You're a fast learner," he groaned, and you couldn't help but giggle, and he growled, capturing your lips in a bruising kiss.
"Oh, you'll pay for that," he muttered against your lips, and you were smiling, your giggles turning to moans.
He sat up a little, pinning you down with one hand splayed across your chest, his hips rolling slowly. His eyes were raking over your body, admiring how beautiful you were, flushed and sweaty.
You were watching him too, his muscles rippling as he moved, the way his chest heaved, his face flushed, and the way his cock glistened as it slid in and out of you.
You reached a hand down, trailing it down his abs, and he smiled at the gesture. You were getting bolder, and he enjoyed it, enjoying how eager you were becoming.
He slowed his pace, his thrusts becoming deeper, harder, and your eyes widened. He leaned down, pressing his body against yours, and captured your lips in a deep, passionate kiss.
You could feel something building again, that exquisite coiling sensation, and you were gasping, your walls fluttering around him. He was moaning, his breath hot against your skin, his thrusts becoming erratic.
You felt the coil snap, your body shaking and trembling, the pleasure washing over you, and your nails were digging into his back.
He groaned, burying his face in your neck, his hands clutching at your body. Your tight walls were squeezing him, and he couldn't hold back anymore, spilling his seed deep inside you.
You felt his warm release, and it felt strange, but not unpleasant, and you were both breathing heavily, trying to catch your breath.
He kissed you again, gently and sweetly, and you responded, sighing softly. When he pulled away, he was smiling, and he rolled off of you, lying on his back beside you.
You were blushing, suddenly feeling shy, and he laughed, reaching out and pulling you into his side and kissing the top of your head.
"Was that so bad?" he asked, and you giggled, hiding your face in his chest.
"No, not at all," you mumbled, and he grinned, placing a warm hand on your stomach.
"I wonder if we made a child tonight," he mused, his fingertips gently caressing the soft skin.
You placed your hand on his, the thought of creating a new life was both frightening and exciting, and you smiled up at him.
"I hope we have many," you murmured, and his eyes widened slightly, his smile genuine, and he squeezed you gently.
"We will have to try harder then," he smirked, and his hand trailed lower, making you squeal.
He pulled you on top of him, and you were both smiling and laughing, the world falling away as he kissed you again.
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