#and is like not even used after halfway into the manga series

[amphibifish]

i find it really funny how maloki insists that the main name heimdallr uses is not heimdall but kasumi higashiyama. girl nobody calls him that (mayura doesn't count she doesn't know he's norse god heimdallr)

[kakushino]

The Fanboy

Tumblr writer fanboy! Tomioka Giyuu x isekai! fem! Reader

He was not ready.

Tags: fluff, Giyuu being a silly fanboy, suggestive (1 filth mention), minor KNY spoilers from manga, isekai Word count: 1,1k

Masterlist

AN: The blog mentioned is purely fictional. Reader is Giyuu's blorbo uwu

Giyuu was used to being disliked by his coworkers. He kept to himself and didn’t attend any of the group events, the only one who liked him was the janitor, Urokodaki-san. Urokodaki Sakonji and Giyuu shared many lunches together, in silence or talking - it didn’t matter. 

It was thanks to those lunches that Giyuu found out their shared passion - Kimetsu no Yaiba manga. The mangaka was a mystery, working under an alias, and the series was nearly finished, the infinity castle arc coming to an end. He was excited to read the last volume - an extra long one - which was rumored to feature his favorite character, [Name].

Oh [Name]... he’d been treated with an entire volume about her background and daily duties as a kakushi before the last arc, though she’d appeared in glimpses throughout the series. He had an embarrassing memory of spilling his admiration to Urokodaki-san at one time - years ago - but it was fate, for the volume about her came out three months afterwards. 

It was also fate that he discovered tumblr not long after. He’d been scrolling through [Name]’s wiki page when something caught his eye - a trivia about her that he hadn’t noticed. Of course he had to try to find the truth on the deep dark web. Instead, he found a treasure trove full of fanfictions of characters from Kimetsu no Yaiba being shipped with readers. 

Giyuu devoured the total number of three fanfictions about [Name] that evening. Only three… because there weren’t any more. It wasn’t right… She should have been appreciated more. Sure, she was not a fighter, but she was a part of crucial infrastructure, often taking on unpleasant roles to support the protagonists of the series - the demon slayers. Perhaps it reminded him of himself and Urokodaki, but the fact stood he absolutely adored [Name], and she deserved more love.

So he would give her that love.

That was two years ago. 

Now, he had a blog of his own, blue-depresso, which he centered around his fav - he had posted various moodboards and headcanons he had about her at the start, but soon moved onto writing ‘x reader’ fanfictions of his own. It was a challenge to put his hidden artistic bone to work, but it was worth it. At times, Giyuu felt like a cult leader, his following quickly growing once he started to post those fanfics.

The few filthy fics he posted had him going long into the night, thinking how [Name] would feel under his hands, how he would take care of all her needs, and fuck her senseless. 

Giyuu kept the blog and his dirty thoughts far away from Urokodaki-san.

He didn’t want the old man to know just how much of a loser he was.

The last volume came out on one (un)remarkable Friday. Giyuu had pre-ordered it, making him excited to rush to the designated pick-up manga store.

The end of the school day could not come soon enough. He raced through his duties, the usual neat stacks of sport equipment haphazard piles when he locked the equipment room; his rush made him leave the school before Kyojuro, who was usually one of the first teachers to leave due to Friday sales at his favorite bakery. The blonde sent him a bewildered look as Giyuu passed him at the gates.

Once home, he put the sacred item (the manga) on the table gently before he yanked his tracksuit off, quickly getting into shower. He wanted to get comfortable before he read it.

Less than ten minutes later, he was ready.

…he wasn’t ready.

But he needed to read it! He had to know what would happen to his [Name]! (And to the protagonists as well-)

Okay, okay, no. Giyuu took a deep breath and opened the book.

He had to put it down halfway through. His dearest [Name]... died. She’d driven a car at the main antagonist to stop him from moving, and she died in the line of duty. Her death was honorable, and she would have wanted that.

Why did he feel so empty then?

Before he knew it, he’d opened the tumblr app on his phone and started typing.

blue-depresso She isn’t dead. She is not dead. #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #what the fuck is this @ G.K.???? 

blue-depresso This just did not happen. I refuse to accept this. #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #dying rn #[Name] is alive

blue-depresso Someone give me G.K.’s location rq because I’m ready to fight #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #fight me G.K.

blue-depresso Okay but maybe it wasn’t her in the car. Hear me out, maybe she jumped out before the car got destroyed??? #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #[Name] is alive

blue-depresso What is even the point of living on if she isn’t alive? What is the point??? #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #im crying #send help

blue-depresso Okay but in my heart, she lives on. You bet your asses I will write that [Name] lives AU once I’m done devouring this volume #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #I won’t abandon my girl in her time of need #she’s my wife #she will live

blue-depresso I’m okay (I’m not). I need to finish this manga.  #kny spoilers #kny spoiler #[Name] #ran out of tissues #i need a drink

Wiping the one tear that left his eye - the tissue tag an exaggeration of the truth, though his throat did get clogged up - he got to reading the rest of the story. 

It felt like he was afloat. What was he gonna do with himself now? His mind wandered to the singular bottle of beer in the fridge his sister gave him - some fancy brand he couldn’t care less about, as he wasn’t a drinker. His body acted before his brain caught up and he drank it, the bitterness a companion to the one in his heart. 

He would write that ‘[Name] lives AU’ tomorrow. Today, he had to bury himself in comfort. There was a fluffy blanket he received from his sister last birthday. Perhaps he should give her a call. It wasn’t that late yet.

In the end he’d fallen asleep on his futon, the blankets under him and his phone laying next to his face. His face flushed, realizing his sister must have talked him to sleep. He would have to make it up to her later.

Giyuu rolled over on his other side to check the time on his clock hanging on the wall, but came face-to-face with a woman instead. 

What the fu-

He scrambled back, trying to create distance from this stranger. Who was it? What was she doing in his flat? What was-?!

Hold on a moment…

His mind ran circles, trying to rationalize what he was seeing. I couldn’t be, could it? But how? This had to be a prank…

The woman stirred, kakushi mask shifting a little. Then, her eyes opened, and it was confirmed.

It was [Name].

dividers made by the amazing @benkeibear

AN: Will this be an one-shot series? IDK but it was fun to write hehe

[brytnoter]

golden kamuy & among us

Because I dream of AUs where no one dies horribly and they all become friends and play videogames together.

Even though the fact that Nikaidou is wearing the skin hood means that Youhei already died ..... so uh ......

I propose a new AU concept (available for ANY series) where you take the exact half point of the story, so anyone who survived up until that point gets to live. Like the AU is the story is exactly the same but after the halfway point there will be no more deaths.

Which means .... 314 chapters.... up until the end of chapter 157, that's the halfway point, ....the circus part O_O omg so if that's correct, their plan worked and Asirpa noticed the name "immortal sugiomoto" in the newspaper and they met that way and NO ONE ELSE DIED O:<

Yeah um I think I'll make another project where I make a note of everyone who dies in the manga after chapter 157 and ........ rewrite it? or not. I don't know. Just notes maybe.

I just wanted to upload one fun little drawing of among us and I accidentally made a new brain pathway O_O

[pokenimagines]

hello! can i request sfw headcanon for arven and nemona? Basically mc\reader being lazy and reading some manga\books instead of prepering to tests, without preporation reader just passed that test with an A (recently i was lazy to prepare for math test, but without any problem i get an A lol)

So I was halfway through writing this when I noticed you asked for headcanons...so here's a fic. I am not perfect. Everyone I know can attest.

Rules | Discord Server (16+)

SFW Nemona and Arven: A Lazy Study

"Hey, little buddy, I know you're smart and all, but..." Arven said, nudging you. You couldn't help but groan in annoyance, looking up from the manga you were currently trying to enjoy. Arven and Nemona were hanging out in your dorm room after Arven suggested you three tried studying. Nemona was almost completely failing her language classes and needed help, meanwhile Arven was currently dying in biology.

"But what?" You asked and Nemona sighed, slamming her book down.

"Why do you get to slack off while I have to study?" The girl pouted, wanting to be doing anything other than studying, "I know, how about we battle to get some excess energy worked off so we can focus on studying!" Nemona suggested; her mind was really one tracked all the time.

"Can't I just finish this series in peace? Penny is only lending it to me for the week." You sighed. Studying was also the last thing you wanted to do, so you simply decided you weren't going to. Winging it seemed like the best thing for you. Besides, you battled pokemon all the time, you knew a thing or two...probably.

"You know midterms are tomorrow, right? There's gotta be one subject you're worried about." Arven said, nudging at you.

"Nope, not a single one." You explained. It seemed the two finally let you off, which meant you could enjoy all the content you wanted on your new manga series.

-------------------------------

"This is unfair...you didn't even study." Arven groaned. The school had posted the leaderboard on who got the best scores in the school. While you weren't number one, you ranked far beyond most of your friends. The only one who ranked higher in your mini group was Penny, but that was a no brainer.

"No way, did you study in secret or something?" Nemona asked, poking your side, "You cheater." She teased.

"I did no such thing; I hate studying. I just decided to wing it. It was all common sense, anyway." You explained, recalling how east the tests were.

"They're right, you know." Penny said and the group turned towards the smaller girl.

"Says the person at the top of the leaderboard." Nemona groaned before smacking her cheeks, "Whatever, at least I know when it comes to battle strategy, I have it all in the bag!" She chuckled.

"No wonder you scored low, you have one thing in your head at all times." Arven mumbled. Thankfully Nemona didn't hear the last comment.

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• Thank you for reading! Did you know we have a discord? It has everything from RPs, General Discussions, and even an 18+ area to go hog wild in! We even do announcements early for when the inbox is opening for requests, as well as other events! Come in and join us!

[merrodi]

☆ Chocomimi Volume 6 English Translation / Chapter 1

Translated through phone scans and my limited knowledge of Japanese! I appreciate any and all corrections.

This series was a big part of my childhood but localization had stopped after volume five, so I’ve decided to translate as much as I can for fun. I hope someone out there enjoys!

link to purchase this book (japanese only)

Note: comments in italics are words spoken outside of the bubble. (comments in parenthesis are thought, not spoken) [comments in brackets are words contained inside a bracket]

This comic is traditionally read right to left, top to bottom.

(skipping over the character pages for now because they’re a lot to translate)

☆ Reading ☆

Choco: It’s autumn, the best season for reading! Choco: Guys, how about we all read books and write down our impressions of them?

Mumu: okay! Is a fashion magazine alright? Choco: Can you please choose something that has a story?

Mimi: okay! Is a shoujo manga alright? Choco: Could you please choose something that doesn’t have pictures?

Mikachin: okay! Is a Japanese dictionary alright? Choco: As long as you’re using it to write down your impressions…

☆ Recommended ☆ Mimi: Mikachin, I read the book you recommended~♡ (New universe theories)

Mikachin: Really? How was it? Mimi: (ehe) Difficult to get through, but interesting!

Mikachin: I see. Mimi, you’re very admirable. Mimi: (honestly, I didn’t understand any of it, but I’m glad I read it anyways)

Mumu: Woah, what’s with the difficulty in this? Mumu: I’m trying to read it, but it’s impossible.

Mikachin: Is that so?  Mikachin: Should I explain to you the parts you don’t understand? Mimi: gasp!

Mikachin: Come over to my house after school today. there’s cake, too. Mumu: huh——- okay, sure. Mimi: ((I made a mistake!!)) how nice…

☆ The Next Day ☆

Mimi: Mumu-chan, did you go to Mikachin’s house yesterday? Mumu: hm? I did.

Mumu: The two of us read the book the whole time in Mikami-kun’s room. I got sleepy. Mimi: (just them alone in Mikachin’s room?!)

Mumu: Halfway through, I fell asleep. Mumu: Mikami-kun ended up giving me a piggyback ride to my house. He’s really kind, huh.  Mimi: (A PIGGYBACK RIDE FROM MIKACHIN?!!??) AAAHHH….

Mimi: I’d also like to be an idiotic and inconsiderate human being… I envy Mumu-chan... sigh… Andrew: You’re already idiotic and inconsiderate enough.

☆ Girls ☆

Mikachin: Sometimes I just don’t get girls, y’know? Andrew: Huh? what happened?

Mikachin: on Snow White... Mikachin: If a stranger covered from head to toe in black offered you an apple… would you normally eat it? Witch: here, take this apple Snow White: oh dear

Andrew: I wouldn’t eat it. That’s way too suspicious. Mikachin: and Little Red Riding Hood, too… Mikachin: The wolf was pretending to be her grandmother in her house…

Mikachin: To not be able to tell the difference from a beast to a human… is that even possible? Red: Gramma, why are your ears so big? Andrew: That’s just how fairy tales are.

☆ Tears ☆

Choco: Speaking of emotional stories… Choco: Once in a while, I’m hit with the desire to really want to read one.

Mumu: I know what you mean! The more you cry, the better it is. Choco: Exactly! I have to read those alone, because tears end up falling from my face.

Mumu: Exactly! And that’s when I snap a pic of my crying face!

Mumu: I like verifying that my crying face is the cutest thing ever~ it’s the photo after I was reading Choco: Sorry, can’t relate to that whatsoever.

☆ Shoujo Manga ☆ 

Choco: Mimi, the manga you lent me is so interesting! I really relate to the main character. Mimi: The protagonist Shouko is really similar to you, Choco!

Choco: Isn’t the transfer student Shindou-kun also a bit like Ando? Choco: Her close friend Yumi is just like you, Mimi, and almost predictably, Matsuda-sensei is like Take-chan, too! (The manga she’s reading is called chocomint)

Mimi: [hehe… Choco doesn’t know this yet, but in volume five, Shouko and Shindou confess to each other and find out they have mutual feelings~] Shindou: please go out with me. Mimi: [and also, Yumi, the girl that Choco said looked like me]

Mimi: [confesses to her homeroom teacher, Matsuda-sensei] Matsuda-sensei: You moron! Matsuda-sensei: I’m going to use this triangle ruler’s 30-degree angle to stab you! Mimi: [that’s just horrible, honestly…] It seems so depressing...

☆ Bible ☆

Choco: Mimi, what book are you reading? Mimi: The “How to Be a Good Woman Book”! If you read it, you’ll become a wonderful lady!

Mimi: Ah, it’s essential that a good woman has an attractive lover! Mimi: I guess I’ll have to study up on the “How to Find a Great Boyfriend Book”.

Mimi: Ahhh… but there’s no doubt that a wonderful boyfriend would also be popular with the ladies… Mimi: I’ll have to research the "Affair Detection book”...

Mimi: sigh… and I’ll need to read the “Getting Back Up After a Broken Heart Book” after we split up from the cheating… I can’t get depressed now! Choco: ah... the only thing she’s learning is delusion…

Fashion tips section!

☆ Feelings ☆ 

Choco: Ando, have you read this too? It’s a book about understanding your pet’s feelings! I borrowed it from Mimi! Ando: nah, I don’t need it.

Choco: Ahh.. you already know whatever Picho’s thinking, huh. Ando: Not at all, but…

Ando: Even if we never reach understanding over an entire lifetime, it’s okay. Ando: If that’s how it is, then I’d be pleased just guessing as to how I can make her smile… thinking of my beloved companion day and night…

Ando: Isn’t that the key to continuing to love other people? Choco: What’s with your dialogue sounding like it’s coming from a master of love?

☆ Returning a Favor ☆ (this is based off a japanese tale called tsuru no ongaeshi)

Bambi: Like a crane who comes to return a favor, Picho turns into a human before your eyes! Bambi: What would you do?

[One night, Picho had opened the door and returned in the appearance of a beautiful maiden...] Picho: Good evening... Ando: That wouldn’t be bad…

Mikachin: Wait, Picho is a girl? I thought he was a guy this whole time. Bambi: Oh yeah, and Picho’s also a little kid. So instead…

Bambi: One night, Picho opened the door and had returned in the appearance of an elementary school boy with a shaved head! Ando: Absolutely not.

☆ Heroine ☆

[A great man’s entire life will remain in history through books.] [His story will be read by all.]

Jin: Wouldn’t it be nice if there were books about ordinary people, not just the greats? Jin: A book written about an ordinary person’s life from their birth up to their death!

Aoi: Would that be interesting to read about? Jin: There’s a chance it wouldn’t be interesting, and there’s a chance it wouldn’t have a happy ending…

Aoi: right? Aoi: (But, if it’s Jin-kun’s book, I might be interested in reading it...)

[If it’s Jin-kun’s book, then I think it’d definitely be happy.] Jin: look, that cloud is like taiyaki! [How many pages in it will I appear?]

Aoi: (No, it’s not how many pages… how many lines?…) Aoi: (Oh…I wonder if I’ll be able to make an appearance at all...) Jin: You know…

Jin: It’s fine if I end up not reading about Aoi-chan’s life.

Aoi: (I-is it…because it’d be so insignificant?!) Jin: or should I say, I wouldn’t have to go to the trouble of reading it.

Jin: Whatever happens in Aoi-chan’s life, my eyes will have seen ALL of it, so that’s why I wouldn’t need a book. Jin: We’ll be together forever, yeah?

Aoi: ........ Aoi: Forever?

Jin: Yep, forever. Aoi: Even when we become adults? Jin: Yup, foreverrrrr. Aoi: I see…

[Then, my book] Jin: look, that cloud is a heart-♥️ Aoi: You’re right. [Will surely have a happy ending.]

[hopeymchope]

Having finally finished reading the DR Kirigiri light novels, here are my closing thoughts and questions.

(For background, I read these translations. Which - as I previously discussed in the first bullet of this post here - may have some small issues throughout.)

I've previously given y'all my report on how I felt / what I was thinking about this series just after passing the halfway point of the light novels, so now it's time for me to bring this whole thing home and offer some closing thoughts.

My first, dominating thought is that this would be so good to see adapted as an anime. I can easily imagine how many episodes it'd take to do each light novel and where you'd logically cut off the story... even more easy, though, would be a manga. It's definitely crying out for that kind of treatment.

Regardless of the (relatively minor) gripes I raise below? This is definitely a great series to read. You get a number of twisty, gripping mysteries, an easy-to-like lead duo, an imposingly powerful enemy force, new background on our favorite lavender-hued detective, and you even get some great new characters added to the mythos — what more do you want?

Okay, but now I'll get into the griping stuff :P For starters: Isn't it... kind of LAME to have Kirigiri repeatedly experience something so similar to the basic setup of DR1 (or any mainline Danganronpa game, really) on MULTIPLE OCCASIONS prior to DR1 ever happening??? But then she just never remotely reference any fo that experience? And YESs, of course I realize she never even obliquely references these events because these prequels weren't actually written by the time of DR1, nor even completed by DR3. But that's the kind of thing you typically want to avoid with prequels, right? ...... Even so, I guess this does take us farther into these stories deserving to be called "Danganronpa" than any other spinoff. And it's not hard to come up with excuses for why she never remotely hinted at these things; she's intentionally acting withdrawn and keeping info to herself throughout DR1 and DR3, after all. So it's not the WORST crime. It's just, like I said: kind of lame.

MORE SPECIFICALLY, let me clarify: Although the cases in DRK don't include a "mutual killing" element, you still get at least three cases where she's [1] trapped in a specific building alongside a group of people who include a killer/"mastermind," the cast subsequently being picked off one by one, and [2] said experiences are also broadcast to a viewing audience. In fact, you even get two cases where [3] the trapped participants are expected to take specific bedrooms to lock themselves in during the nighttime! And even [4] one case where there's a weird, automated "host character" overseeing the whole thing, which is being operated around a specific set of rules. That's a helluva thing, isn't it?

I've previously expressed GREAT TREPIDATION about one specific element of this series: I was told that supposedly, these light novels included evidence that Fuhito was manipulating Kyoko into hating her father, her dad was always a victim, and Kyoko never realized that she was basically molded from birth by someone who was manipulating her feelings and actions. It all made Kyoko considering Fuhito her "most imporant person" (per DR1 and UDG's captives) come off as this tragic tale where our supposed "master detective" never realized she's been a victim of gaslighting and manipulation for many years, which would change SO MUCH CONTEXT behind her life's work and her relationships with both Jin and Fuhito. HOWEVER, GUESS WHAT? None of that shit was even true! HUZZAH!!!! NOTHING in these light novels goes against what we already knew about Kyoko, Jin, Fuhito, or their relationship(s) with one another... though there is some minor new insight provided into a couple of details. We get a new look at how Jin actually cared about Kyoko from afar (via the "Jin Ex Machina" business I mentioned in the previous post), which is in line with the hints of his lingering love for her we tasted in both DR1 and DR3 without either exonerating him for his choices OR making him 100% correct. We repeatedly watch Kyoko questioning/doubting her grandfather's/family's longstanding "detective work must come above and before personal concerns" rules. And we also get a taste of Fuhito being protective of Kyoko when he learns of the kind of danger she's in — yet simultaneously having complete trust in her talent and ability to overcome said danger. Fuhito seems to even gently help Kyoko understand Samidare's actions near of the end of the final volume... although we only get a taste of his help via Kyoko's internal thoughts, so we don't know exactly what he said to her. TL/DR? My point is simply this: The DRK light novels keep the overall morality / goodness of Kyoko's family dynamics in the same place we already understood them from the games: Kyoko and Fuhito are very close and care about each other without being overtly emotional about it, there is a rift between Jin and the rest of his family over Fuhito priortizing case work above visiting his dying daughter on her deathbed, Jin clearly still concerns/cares that linger for his daughter, etc.

What's with so many scenes of "Black Challenges" or "Duel Noirs" having signs defaced to include the word "DESPAIR"? Is that just some extra branding for the main franchise's themes? Feels out of place.

I feel bad for all those orphans who adored this dude.

General thoughts on numerous new-to-DR characters: As I said in my last post about this series, Samidare is likeable but spends most of the series very thinly defined — plus she's pretty slow on the uptake. Thankfully, by Volume 4 she starts finally pulling her weight, and she gets some much-needed expansion of her background in Volume 7 (just in time for her to make some dumb decisions). Licorne is probably the second-most important new character, and he's an asshole. An interesting one, though! And he does some heroic things! .... even if he isn't really all that morally invested in helping people. He's a self-centered asshole for most of the series, frankly, and I don't care much whether he's around or not. Salvadore Yadorigi Fukuro is awesome; a straight-up superb character with a very "DR" kind of skill/talent. Yaki Hajiki is a character who's also hard to dislike, and I wish he got more "screen time," because he's very intriguing. Johnny Arp is a fascinating one, though he definitely shares some dickish behavior with Lico. Still, I'm always engaged when he's on the page. And... look, I'm fond of Meruko "Pumpkinhead" Mifune. She's fun, sure, but I also see real potential for depth that isn't explored herin.

My remaining observations/thoughts contain some spoilers for the Danganronpa Kirigiri series, so I'm putting the rest UNDER THE BELOW CUT... although I still avoid mentioning the identities of any culprits or masterminds so as to keep the primary case mysteries intact.

Yadorigi = Intelligent, quiet dude in sunglasses who looks like the answer to "What if Munakata found his chill?"

What, exactly, is the state of Yadorigi's eyesight by the end of the series? Initially, we learn that his unique eyesight is very important to his work in uncovering fraud. Later, after a blow to the head, we're told that his eyesight will never be the same as it previously was. In the final volume, he visits Kyoko while wielding a white cane. So uh... does that cane imply that SYF is now blind or very close to it? Or am I reading too much into a walking stick here?

Nothing infuriates me quite as much as when major problems in a story could be easily resolved via basic fucking communication, and a failure to communicate on a base level is absolutely CORE to why things go south in the seventh and final volume. By the time Kyoko and Yui are heading out to the case, the situation is this: Without Kyoko's knowledge, our redacted overarching mastermind (henceforth referred to as "ROM") tried to get Samidare to agree to be the culprit in this final Black Challenge. She refused. ROM then said their organization (the Crime Victim's Relief Committee) will eliminate Kyoko if Samidare doesn't play along. And then, right after saying this? ROM pretty clearly DIED right in front of Samidare, before she can ever express any intention of changing her mind or not. She is then confronted by the enigmatic Tokichiro Endo, who is basically the go-between for culprits and the organization, who demands her final answer. Based on what happens in the case immediately after this, it appears that this conversation somehow ended with Samidare refusing to be the true culprit in this case but ALSO accepting that she would be framed for the murders and take the fall. So now Samidare has a choice to make: Does she (A) trust the Crime Victims' Relief Committee to keep their promise and leave Kyoko alone so long as she keeps her mouth shut...... even though Samidare refused to meet their demands and become the case's culprit? OOOORRR does Yui (B) realize that the Committee has already broken their supposed "rules" by forcibly coercing her into being the culpri — not to mention the fact that they're routinely aiding and abetting murders — which adds up to mean that she can't trust their word and must warn Kyoko of the danger she's in now that the committee has threatened her life directly? Any thinking person should choose (B), but Samidare of course chooses (A) so the plot will happen. *FACEPALM*

The worst part of this is that EVEN when our two heroines have just barely escaped from a burning building and fled out into freezing conditions, leaving them on the razor's edge between two possible methods of death with everyone else from the case seemingly already being dead? Samidare STILL won't outright deny being the case's culprit when accused. With literally NO REASON LEFT not to come clean, she never says jack shit. And then she dies!

During the denouement, the conclusion Kyoko reaches after leaving the hospital and revisiting the scene is... murky, and I think this might be something caused by the translation methods used. It currently reads as though Kyoko reaches the correct conclusion about the case, accurately determining Samidare's innocent AND identifying the true culprit(s). However... she doesn't seem to be 100% confident in her decision? It sounds like Kiri still harbors some lingering doubts about Samidare possibly being guilty?..... Even though she sounds really confident in her (correct) conclusions immediately before that. So it's left ambiguous. Which, I suppose, is one way to maintain Kiri being the Best Detective while simultaneously leaving room for her line in DR1 about how her burns happened because she "trusted the wrong person." She almost entirely knows that she didn't actually trust the wrong person, but they have to leave some doubt so that line can exist? ...... IF this translation is even accurate on this part.

Say... why did Samidare believe she'd die on this mission? It wasn't actually any more inherently dangerous than any other mission her and Kyoko had gone on... LESS dangerous than some, I'd argue! But she prepares this whole letter for her eventual death, so she clearly thought it was a strong possibility. My only guess is that she believed Kyoko was going to be targeted for death, and she planned to fulfill her oft-promised role as Kyoko's human shield. But if that was REALLY something Samidare thought was going to happen, then she had NO REASON to not tell Kyoko the truth about everything. If they're already out to kill Kiri, then OF COURSE it's smartest to warn her about it! So: Why the "last letter"? What made you think you were fucked, Yui?

In the end, ROM's overarching mission is both a success and a failure. Do they take away Kyoko's main emotional attachment, making her withdraw even further into pure logic so she'll avoid getting hurt? Yes. Do they make her deny the value of such attachments in the first place, resulting in her staying isolated forever after? No. She 95% knows she's right about Samidare's innocence in spite of ROM's attempts to frame her; it's just the pain of the loss that makes Kyoko withdraw, not some grander conclusion about distrusting everyone. In fact? I'd argue that Kyoko's speech in DR1's Chapter 4 about accounting for emotions is a strong rebuke of ROM's entire view of the world.

....by the way, does ROM have their own copy of Junko's talent??! It sure seems like they're another "Ultimate Analyst," essentially; able to see patterns of behavior so clearly that they can essentially predict most future events.

[makeste]

Just out of pure curiosity, isn't this a horrible way to experience the story lmao?

I'm not saying it's for everyone, but it's worked for me personally so far. more than I would have expected, tbh!

honestly though, this might sound kind of backwards, but a big part of my decision to read these chapters early had more to do with me NOT wanting to be spoiled. let me explain.

I went on hiatus from the BnHA manga beginning in January 2022. I remained completely spoiler-free for almost eight whole months without the slightest issue. then August happened. :')

the thing is, despite my taking a break from the manga, I didn't stop reading fanfiction. in fact I probably read more fic than I usually do, because I missed the series and the characters. it may sound odd that I had the time to read fic but couldn't use that same time to catch up with the manga instead, but they're very different things as far as mental load and time commitment. one is very passive, almost relaxed, while the other requires me to be quick-witted and mentally engaged (at least if I want to do a halfway decent job). something which I wasn't really capable of being at the time. so yeah.

anyway so at the time I generally thought of fanfic as a relatively safe activity, spoiler-wise. and to be fair it was. right up until the single most popular character in the series fucking DIED in the most grisly way possible while fighting the main villain, right in the middle of everyone's fucking summer break. after which pretty much the entirety of fandom erupted into "BAKUGOU DIED??!" and "HE DIED THINKING ABOUT IZUKU??!" and "BABY BOY WANTED ALL MIGHT TO SIGN HIS TRADING CARD?!?!" and "RAIN!?!?" etc. etc. pretty much 24/7 on all social platforms for weeks on end.

so what I learned from that experience is that no matter how good you are at dodging spoilers, it is literally impossible to do so when something THAT momentous and life-altering happens your favorite character who also happens to be fandom's most beloved blorbo. hell, I didn't even get spoiled on AO3 initially; they got me over on YouTube of all places. literally nothing I could do to prevent it. and after that, no matter how meticulously I avoided all of the fics tagged with "362: Light Fades to Rain spoilers", I still kept getting caught off guard because people would casually drop spoilers into untagged fics as well. so I had a bunch of additional little details spoiled for me unexpectedly and I was pretty much defenseless against it. pretty much the only way I could have avoided it all would have been to stop reading Kacchan whump entirely. which, idk about you, but to me that would have been a far more horrible fate. :p

anyway so fast forward to last month, and Kacchan finally came back, and you bet your ass I spoiled myself for it immediately. because I knew it would still take me forever to get caught up The Right Way, and in the meantime I would once again be leaving myself at the mercy of the internet. at least this way I have control over where and when and how I find out. and I got to experience the moment via the manga itself, rather than a third party. and I have to say, this way was vastly preferable to the alternative.

and at the end of the day that's pretty much the same rationale I had for giving in and reading 404 - 406 as well. I knew that once Kacchan was back, the pace of the Final Battle was going to start picking up, and things were going to start happening, and I'd rather read all of those things for myself! like just for example, there's close to a 100% chance the "Kacchan" line from this week would have been spoiled for me in someone's fic if I hadn't read 406 beforehand. just little things like that. anyway so this way, no matter what happens to Kacchan and Deku from this point forward, I'll get to read it fresh and experience it in a way that I unfortunately never got to with the chapter 362 moment. and so to me, that's more than worth the trade-off.

[queer-and-dear-books]

Title: Blue Flag

Author: KAITO

Genre: Comics | Friendship | Romance | LGBTQ+

Content Warnings: Homophobia | Sexism | Mentioned Sexual Assault

Overall Rating: 9.8/10

Personal Opinion: One of my favorite stories ever. It’s a bittersweet journey as we follow Taichi Ichinose, Toma Mita, and Futaba Kuze navigate their last year of high school together. Along the way, they struggle against gender norms and the curse of falling for someone you can never have. I love these characters with my whole heart. They actually inspired one of my novel ideas, the only one I ever finished so this manga has a special place in my heart.

Do I Own These Books? Yes! The photos I used for this post actually are of my own copies.

Spoilers Below For My Likes & Dislikes:

Likes:

- That ending! Holy fucking shit! Taichi is presented as the main protagonist in this series so when we reach the epilogue, we naturally assume that we’re in Taichi’s POV. We’re led to believe that since one of the first things that character does is write the name “Ichinose” at Futaba’s wedding. But then post-wedding, we see Taichi! By process of elimination, the only possible character that could be the POV is Toma! Meaning Taichi and Toma got married! And we know they are married because they live together, they hold hands in the epilogue, and they’re both wearing rings. I squealed. It was such a twist but it also didn’t come out of left field. Toward the end of the series, there were hints that Taichi had reciprocated Toma’s feelings, he just never knew loving men could be an option for him until Toma confessed! Ugh, that epilogue was just so good.

- Anyway, let’s talk about some of the other stuff. I adore the art style. It’s cute and wholesome and each of the characters have their own flavor. Toma exudes big dog energy. Taichi is indeed a tiny gremlin with a good heart. And Futaba is a hamster through and through. The way their drawn matches their personalities so well. And specifically, I love the way the artist drew Toma’s smile. It’s just so radiant and beautiful, I had a crush on him by the end of the series.

- Mami speaks to me on a spiritual level. Why can’t men and women be just friends? Why can’t a girl just hang out with the bros? Why can’t guys wear makeup and why can’t girls play video games? Why should she be cut out from friend groups just because she interacts with a guy? It’s ridiculous and the unfortunate part is, I’ve seen girls treated the way Mami has and it disgusts me. So to see her find a friend in Taichi and Toma and Futaba after everything she went through in middle school, I just wanted her to be happy. And honestly, she had such a badass moment when she said, “Screw everyone else, I’m doing what I want when I want.”

- Mad respect for Shingo for always being there for Mami even when his girlfriends would tell him they were jealous of her. Like fuck you, he was friends with Mami first, why should he stop hanging out with her just because you’re insecure? He also only fought Toma to protect Mami and I love that. But he has no ulterior motives, no romantic interest in Mami, he sees her as a woman but more importantly, as his best friend.

- The deep conversations where Masumi would allude to her sexuality were always so gripping. Like, I really felt for her whenever she was lamenting being in love with a girl and being unable to find happiness with a guy. But Mami was also right that Masumi needed to meet people halfway. Seeing them cry together really tugged at my heartstrings.

- The board game that Taichi and Toma came up with together is such a cute ass detail. Landing on a space where everyone gets friendship power? Ingenious. But the part that really got me was Toma putting their character pieces inside of the charm he gave Taichi, that got me so emotional. “Friendship Power” fuck you, I’m in tears.

- One of my favorite moments was the festival. Toma in a yukata and the girls in kimonos was so great, they looked amazing! But also, that was when Toma gave Taichi his birthday present and I just about bawled my eyes out over it.

Dislikes:

- Kensuke. The source of all the homophobia and vulgar sexism in this series. I hate him. I do understand where some of his homophobia comes from considering his past but the girls were right when they said that has nothing to do with Toma. Anyway, Kensuke isn’t even who I have a big problem with. No, it’s actually Shingo. Yo, he said to the girls that they were just like Kensuke for not tolerating his intolerance. BITCH! And the story framed it like he was right. Ugh, that’s fucked up.

- I wanted more of Taichi and Toma. I want to know how they got together. What happened in between the main story and the epilogue, please tell me KAITO! I need to know how they found each other and fell in love!

[theswordwizard]

for the 'top 5' ask post: top 5 books?

HMMM I've been reading mostly nonfiction lately so I would say:

The Internet Does Not Exist (E-flux Journal) - It's a collection of essays from different people talking about technology in ways that really opened my mind a lot to how I think about systems. They also published The Wretched of the Screen by Hito Steyerl which is a collection of her essays on 'the politics of the image,' and I always love her writings.

New Dark Age: Technology and the End of the Future by James Bridle, which is about how we as a collection of societies haven't prepared for the radical increases in computational power we've achieved, and how they actually make it more difficult to understand the world as we're overwhelmed with data. Incredibly informative on a lot of different interweaving topics.

This is a manga but I just finished Billy Bat by Naoki Urasawa and Takashi Nagasaki. It's almost a detective story? A Japanese-American comic artist in America learns that he might have copied a character from a manga in Japan and takes a trip to check. 100 or so chapters later astronaut speaks to the cartoon character drawn on the moon and chooses whether to end the world or not. I don't think it's officially released in English so I read a scanlation online somewhere (I don't think it's particularly hard to find though).

The Queer Art of Failure by Jack Halberstam, which was honestly a primary inspiration to actually making Butchverse as a semi-serious series of essays. It proposes alternatives to the mainstream, the heteropatriarchal, the accepted, and blending together high theory and low culture in a really comprehensible read. He also wrote Female Masculinity, which I reference a lot in Butchverse.

I recently finished Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer, and if you liked the movie you will definitely like the book. INCREDIBLY suspenseful even after watching the movie, it's pretty different. The next two books in the series aren't as heavy-hitters IMO, but I know a lot of people that really like them so I think they're worth reading.

If you want a really great narrative that's essentially a book with some images and REALLY good music, I'm still halfway through Umineko (use the original graphics!!!) and it is possibly the GOAT.

[benkyoutobentou]

31 Days of Productivity Reading: Day sixteen

Before: Since we're now about halfway through the month, let's take another look at my goals for March-

Finish No. 6 volume 3

Read 憎らしい彼

Read 独り舞 (2/3 there!)

Read at least ten volumes of manga (3/10)

Read at least an hour per day (still still on track!)

Am I at least halfway through my (tangible) goals? Uh, debatable. Either way, I think completing my goals is still completely doable!

I still have seven volumes of manga to read, so is there anything I'd like to get to this month? Yes. Too many. So let's narrow it down. I would very much like to get in at least one more volume of ベルサイユのばら (1/7), I want to start はなものがたり (2/7) but I only have one volume and I'm in the debacle of "but what if I like it so much that I need to read the rest right away?", it's not that I necessarily want to read スリーピングデッド (4/7) this month but more of I don't think I'll be able to hold off reading it until next month, and I've also been feeling a bit like picking up another volume of 3月のライオン (5/7) lately, and okay I think that's enough. I could just list off every single series in my tbr but then we'd be here all day. I won't even promise that I'll get to anything I listed here because that's just how life pans out sometimes. I listed off all those manga and didn't even name ウツボラ don't even look at me.

After: As much as I’m ready for this musical to be over, it saved me today because I don’t think I would’ve gotten any reading in had I not been in a position where I have to sit in one place and do nothing for like an hour and a half in bit and pieces. In addition to usual Saturday errands and the musical, I did some gardening in the afternoon and went to a party tonight. I’m really not a partier (I mean look at me, my hobbies are language learning and reading) but I always make a point to go when my next door neighbors host parties because it forces me to be at least a little social. Plus, I usually know a good amount of the people there. And this time, I ended up talking to someone about books and they invited me to their book club! Just what I need, more books I have to read. Of course I said yes.

Today, I read twenty two pages, which would be around an hour and eighteen minutes if I were to use yesterday’s average reading pace of four minutes per page. If I read another twenty pages tomorrow, I would only have about thirty pages left to read on Monday which I think is totally doable in a single day. The end is in sight! Again, I don’t dislike this book or think it’s bad, it’s just a bit too high level for my Japanese right now. I am glad to have read it, though. Hopefully my next read will pick me back up off the ground and remind me that I actually can read in this language.

I'm also still going strong with doing my JPDB reviews, and I'm now in the 1200s. Slow and steady wins the race and I'm hoping that mentioning it here will keep me on track.

[polyamanga]

Poly Rep: We Started a Threesome!!

We Started a Threesome!!, or 3 Partner Hajimemashita!!, is a romantic drama manga by author Katsu Aki.

Lia, Suisei and Emito have known each other since they were children, taking care of a stray cat in the forest. They were inseparable, and the day after they graduated high school, the three of them got unofficially married.

Now adults, the three of them live together in an apartment in the city, far away from their hometown and all the bad memories that live there. Lia is adamant their path in life is the right one, and Emito tends to go along with whatever Lia says, but Suisei still has doubts.

WSAT is...a bizarre read. Three volumes total, it's not overly long, but all three volumes retread the same path over and over, with a couple pit stops that are a VERY jarring shift in tone along the way.

Spoilers from here on out:

Nearly every side character in this series is an enemy to the protagonists in some way, and to say "some way" is a bit generous, because it's almost all in the same way. A character appears, finds out the protagonists are polyamorous, and either try to seduce one of them themselves, or begin to harass them and convince them of how unhealthy and doomed polyam relationships are...or maybe both at the same time!

Lia's boss tries to seduce her as a fellow believer in "free love" ("Wouldn't you be even happier with four?"), Suisei's coworker tells him they're just putting off the inevitable ("Don't you think you're fooling yourself?"), Emito's coworker and her boyfriend want Emito for themselves ("You don't just have to stick to your little threesome..."), Lia's coworkers harrass her for her lifestyle ("You're just a sex-hungry whore that can't be satisfied with just one man!"), Lia's friend from their school days quotes the bible to tell her she's being used (""No one can serve two masters"...loving two people equally at the same time is impossible." and also the incredible line "you're basically just taking turns raping your girlfriend!")...et cetera, et cetera, for all three volumes. A certain degree of conflict is perfectly reasonable in a romantic drama about polyamory, but it becomes stale very quickly when every character is more or less preaching the same thing, and the protagonists react the same way each time.

When faced with opposition, Lia insists this is their path to happiness, and that she won't let go of either Suisei or Emito.

Suisei, in that situation, says this is what they chose as a triad and it will always be that way, but internally he wonders if it's really the best choice.

Emito, says the two of them need him, but ultimately isn't sure where he belongs in the relationship...for a reason that begins to be explored halfway through the series.

These feelings are reiterated ad nauseum without much noteworthy change.

And then, in the middle of volume two, (trigger warning),

Emito's mother drags him back to their hometown, where he is, off-screen, presumably sexually assaulted by Emito's father's boss. It is revealed in this same chapter, that this happened when he was a child as well. He would be dressed up as a girl in this grown man's apartment...and what happens afterward is up to the reader to interpret, but seems fairly obvious.

This is a very sudden and very starling development that felt very out of left field. I don't recall any mention of Emito's past trauma in volume one, despite how much focus they give to Lia's trauma regarding her parent's suicide. It's a jarring moment that almost feels like it's there for shock value, and also comes across as somewhat offensive when it's ripple-effect comes into play later on.

Near the end of volume two, Emito's coworker suggests to Lia that Emito is in love with Suisei, and has been hiding it for the sake of keeping the dynamic of their triad in tact. However, it's revealed in the middle of volume three that it isn't that simple. Emito isn't just in love with Suisei, he's jealous of Lia...as in, he wants to be Lia. Emito has been dressing as a woman and stalking Suisei and Lia, and has been sleeping around with his coworker's boyfriend.

After this, Emito is revealed, right at the end of volume three, to have transitioned, and looks exactly like Lia. (She still goes by Emito, however.)

Emito being revealed to be a transwoman isn't a problem on it's face--it's an interesting reveal, when separated from it's questionable optics regarding her sexual assault and, seemingly, only wanting to be a woman so she can be with Suisei. This aspect isn't explored enough, in my opinion, leaving us with just the shock-reveal of Emito having been cross-dressing and sleeping around. It seems like the intention may have been that Emito was sleeping with another man to explore how she feels about her identity, but again, it isn't explored outside of it's relation to her feelings for Suisei.

It's also worth noting that this reveal leads to Emito running out into the street and getting hit by a truck. She doesn't get isekai'd thankfully, she makes a full recovery, but there is a time-skip of 6 months of her staying in a coma, and Lia finding out she's been pregnant for a while (she doesn't know which of them, uh, sired the child). There's also a bait-and-switch in the last chapter, where the series makes you believe Lia has died during childbirth. But, it's revealed that both Lia and the child are fine and they're all living happily ever after.

Overall, it's messy. It's messy and uncomfortable basically the whole way through, even the moments that are meant to be lighthearted still feel bizarrely sinister with the way the dialogue is worded. It's technically meant to be positive about polyamory, but it doesn't really come across that way.

Even putting all of that aside, it's just not a very well written series. The pacing is so fast that none of the big moments have time to breathe, including the sudden inclusion of sexual assault. It's breezed by at lightning speed.

It's not a very good romance, and it's not a very good drama either. And if it can't manage to be good at either of those things, it's gonna be pretty hard to be a good polyam series.

[penultimate-step]

Cliffhangers: when do they help?

There's a reductive negative stereotype of cliffhangers that comes to mind when people complain about them: with neither planning nor setup, a dramatic situation occurs to the characters. "how will the characters get out of this one?," asks a dramatic voiceover, as the show cuts to credits. Then, next episode, the whole thing is resolved immediately in two seconds, so the series can go back to focusing on the actual plot.

Now, as I said, this is something of a stereotype, not something that often happens - most writers know better than to do something so blatant. It does sometimes happen, but usually the situation has more nuance to it than that.

The cliffhanger that inspired this, the recent Oshi no Ko 158-9, has very little of those mitigating factors. It is almost entirely the negative stereotype, a cliffhanger that adds very little to the story and detracts much. Which got me thinking a bit on cliffhangers in general - what separates a good one from a bad one?

The same week OnK gave us that disappointing cliffhanger, another weekly manga I follow, Chainsaw Man, had a cliffhanger that felt much more interesting. (Though perhaps given we haven't had the followup chapter, this is premature...nonetheless, it is an easy at hand example.) Looking at the chapters preceding them, we can see a difference in pacing and buildup.

OnK 158 comes after a few chapters of winding down and calmer pacing - the cliffhanger, in this case, doubles as a spike in tension, intended to kickstart the next bit of serious plot, coming as a surprise and shock to the readers. This is already something of a problem, as it doesn't have anything to build on; but arcs have to start somewhere, this isn't in itself a problem. but by framing it a sudden jump, it puts all the true requirements for execution on the followup, where it's leading to. Which is why when the next chapter immediately follows up with a "just kidding, teehee uwu" it kills the whole momentum.

CSM 176 goes for the more conservative approach - while it does still end on a shocking twist, this comes in the middle of an already intense fight scene. It forms one brick in a larger rising action, supported by previous scenes, so even if the followup doesn't land it doesn't kill the whole momentum. It's not trying to establish it's own setup - where OnK ended one chapter with a sharp shock and then tried to offramp into character revelations, CSM dual purposes them - Yoru's revelation about the Gun (and Tank) as well as her own personal actions are twist, cliffhanger, and plot development all in one. So it works as a story beat regardless of where the chapter leaves off.

But that feels a little too hostile to cliffhangers, right? Like am I just saying that cliffhangers are an artifact of the serial storytelling format, and could basically be excised? Is a "good cliffhanger," one that integrates itself with the story beats, basically indistinguishable from a non-cliffhanger? that can't be true, right?

Anyway while rolling this around in my head I tried to think about some memorable and positive cliffhangers that I've read in the past. And one that came to mind was from about halfway through the webnovel Pact. So, spoilers for that.

So at the end of Arc 7, the protagonist gets into a fight with a demon. He loses. Chapter cuts, we start arc 8 - from a completely different perspective. What happened to our previous protag is left up in the air for a whole arc, with hints slowly trickling in - but it is only when the arc ends that we get a more complete picture, that he had lost his connections, been removed from all the memories of others, and fallen into a place outside conventional reality.

In this case, the cliffhanger, I would argue, helps the narrative significantly - in separating the event from the resolution, forcing readers to stew on it while other plot threads go on, it made the eventual revelations more satisfying, not less.

I don't think that quite helps my point though. "Cliffhangers are good when planned and executed into the story and bad when they aren't" seems like 2 steps away from saying "its good when its good and bad when its bad," that doesn't much clarify things for me.

That might just be what it boils down to, though - cliffhangers are just one of many ways to control the pacing and tension in a story, with no special negative or beneficial properties, and are good when used in cases where an upswing in those things are good, or the author otherwise wants to direct focus and attention to an element. The negative stereotype, with examples like OnK's, are a result of pursuing those in the short term while sacrificing longer-term story stability - a misstep many longer stories make, not anything tied to cliffhangers inherently.

I still feel like there's something important I'm missing that separates the bad example from the good. But I think I've lost the train of thought here, and this has gone on far too long for what was originally intended to me just me musing to myself about why recent developments in my favorite ongoing manga aren't hitting as well as they should.

[fierrochase-falafel]

Interpreting insecurity: looking into Aoki from Kieta Hatsukoi (the manga)

I finished Kieta Hatsukoi (My Love Mix-Up) lately and I've been...invested. It's a fun little shuojo manga with interesting main characters, insightful conversations, realistic portrayals of high school and high school relationships, and is also just really funny and endearing. The main romantic pair, Aoki Souta and Ida Kousuke, absolutely radiate ADHD bisexual and autism gay (always an entertaining combination) and they're so great, I would highly recommend. I'm halfway through the live action adaptation as well, and it genuinely reflects the original work so well in its medium that I'm going to highly recommend that too. Spoiler-free review aside, let's get into it.

Anyways, there was this 1 line in volume 8 that got me thinking from when Aoki was dwelling about Ida's mother possibly disliking him, and he thinks:

"Aoki is so wonderful." "He's too good to be dating Kousuke." That'd never happen...

Now this was really interesting to me (and was the beginning of this entire rabbit hole), because the scenario that Aoki would surely WANT is for Ida's mother to be perfectly happy with him dating Ida. Something along the lines of, "I'm so glad he's dating Kousuke!" But no...the comparison he makes with the current assumed scenario of Ida's mother disliking him is one where Ida's mother likes him so much she thinks he's TOO good to be dating Ida. And the distinction is subtle, and seemingly doesn't mean anything. Earlier in the same chapter in volume 8, Aoki's mother says, "I really wish I had a son like you", about Ida. A very Asian parent thing to say honestly (/lh). It doesn't negate Aoki's being her valued son but emphasises that the characteristics of Ida are something she would've wanted in her own child, and something she doesn't see in her own son. It's another offhand comment, another subtle comment, however these small things combined with what we already know about Aoki do shape the way I view him.

Aoki is a character who we meet, from the get-go, messing up. The first panel is him forgetting his eraser and frantically asking around for one, and then him dropping Hashimoto's eraser leads to a whole 9 volumes of Aoki messing up. He's not the only one to mess up, of course, but he does spend a LOT of the series being his own worst enemy (which is so real) due to his impulsivity and overthinking. It's established early on that he struggles to do well at school, and it's often joked about that he wants to be more popular but he isn't. There was that one short in volume 7 where he was getting hyped about being compared to a famous handsome actor until it turned out the girls were just making fun of him a little, and even though he got over it easily, he still felt a bit insecure about it. He is also somewhat insecure about being made fun of for his weight when he was really young (referring to it as his "dark past" at age 17/18 feels like a sign he didn't fully get over it). His mother comments earlier in volume 8 that he wasn't good at studying the way his sister was, which was meant to be funny but also implies his sister overshadowed him academically as well.

Aoki is easygoing and takes a lot of this in stride, with it being used for passing jokes as opposed to something that he thinks about very deeply. That being said, with all this combined, Aoki is shown to be quite insecure, because even when he isn't outright failing, he's never been "good enough". Let's take a fairly minor example of this: he's not unpopular but girls didn't seem to fall for him at all, and don't through the series. The series starts with him getting friendzoned by Hashimoto after all, and even when we see instances of girls liking Ida (Kokoro, Mai when he was a kid), Aoki never seems to have that. He doesn't get chocolates in his locker on Valentine's day, and the one time in-series he thought someone might have a crush on him (Saionji), she liked their work manager instead. The series never takes itself too seriously when it comes to this, as Aoki is easygoing, but in my opinion they add context to why Aoki seems to lack a lot of self-confidence. Aoki wanting to surpass other people's expectations for him and feeling guilty/worthless about not 'performing well enough' become a bigger deal in terms of academia and school, as I will get to.

Aoki is paralleled with Ida a lot actually, as someone who cares more about societal status norms but is unable to accomplish them to the same degree. Academically, Aoki regularly worries Ida is leaving him behind in terms of grades and the future, and he wants to keep up with Ida so he feels they can have a future together that is fulfilling for Ida. Furthermore, Aoki's insecurities about their relationship often stem from the idea that he is having to try more than Ida, or the relationship might mean more to him than Ida because Ida seems very naturally calm and collected where Aoki is not. Ida's room is tidy, Ida is able to study with the assumption he will pass, Ida is in the A-class for skiing, Ida knows what he wants to do after graduating: Ida seems like a guy who has everything together, and Aoki comparing himself to Ida is what often causes internal conflict in him until he learns to somewhat let it go before the exam. For Aoki has always never been 'good enough', and he struggles through life very expressively. He freaks out massively partially because he's insecure about messing up again, assuming he's done something wrong and reacting defensively to that (like his massive freak-out over whether Ida's mom likes him or not). Ida, however, doesn't even notice a lot of this stuff at all, and is therefore shown often having the opposte problem to Aoki. Where Aoki knows exactly how he feels and struggles a lot with being straightforward about it and not overthinking too much, Ida struggles with thinking more and thoroughly about how he and other people feel. I think Aoki and Ida coming in from completely different sides on this leads to some of Aoki's defensiveness (see comments such as "What is with you?" and "What are you doing?" when he seems annoyed) when talking with Ida. It sounds insensitive but really a lot of the time they do not understand what the other is doing at all, and if Aoki feels like he is being judged in the slightest he will immediately double down on it because he's somewhat insecure. Ida's lack of expressiveness (and thus more collected appearance) compared to Aoki's super expressiveness contributes to this as well, I think. I think I'd argue Aoki and Ida are one of those "opposites attract but in some surprising ways they're quite similar" fictional couples, because they perceive and engage with the world very differently, but when it comes down to it, they take their emotions very seriously and manage to take their relationship at their own pace without trying to put pressure on each other (this was something Hashimoto and Akkun struggled with in their relationship quite a bit).

Coming back to where I started this post, Aoki's comment isn't too serious but I think it tells us Aoki assumes quite quickly that Ida's mother A) doesn't like him and B) doesn't like him because of how good he intrinsically is. It would be way more plausible for Ida's mother to want him to spend less time with Ida because she's worried they'll distract each other from studying or something, but Aoki assumes it is his fault because he isn't good enough for her. The way he doesn't feel like he's good enough academically or in handling relationships. This is something he truly feels and that contributes to him making impulsive decisions to salvage what he thinks is the be-all end-all. He does get angry with Ida when Ida tells him he doesn't have to push himself to go to Syuei University because he sees it as a slight on his own abilities, and a sign he isn't good enough to make it there with someone as seemingly put-together as Ida. Okano has to remind him that he is himself and shouldn't compare himself to Ida: as much of a mixed bag Okano is (yeah he does become more open-minded from volume 5 but the bar was not high), it's important for Aoki to know that.

I will say though, in Aoki's relationship with Ida, despite involving SO much miscommunication and Aoki being worried he isn't good enough to date Ida, Aoki's relationship with his insecurities evolves very clearly with Ida. In volume 1 he's worrying over Hashimoto and Ida deserving each other and not wanting them to worry about him getting in the way despite having feelings for both of them at different points in the story. Even though he believes they deserve someone as good as each other and he never stood a chance (especially as he tells Ida), Ida is the first one to tell him he's kind and shouldn't give up just because he thinks he isn't good enough for someone else. Aoki does eventually take the leap and tell Ida he likes him on the Hokkaido trip despite his own reservations that usually lead him to give up and get defensive before he's even taken any action. Ida's blunt honesty and direct communication rubs off on him a bit, and he slowly starts broaching more personal subjects and becoming less embarassed about it. Ida gives him advice on a future field of study when Aoki asks about it, and Aoki is the one who brings up so many topics in later volumes such as his fears about whether Ida's mother likes him and whether they ought to live together in university. Volume 5 particularly strikes me as a milestone for Aoki. After getting defensive and awkward about Ida's reaction to them touching hands, Aoki dwells on it by himself for a good while but then does apologetically admit he was thinking about that to Ida. Ida assures him he doesn't have to be on his guard, to paraphrase, and holds his hand to show he isn't weirded out by Aoki at all. Aoki being the one to admit something he feels embarassed about to Ida without lashing out is huge growth for him, and shows how far he's come in communication and facing his fears since meeting Ida. Ida's blunt nature means he always means what he says and says what he means, so Aoki slowly learns to talk to Ida honestly and trust that he isn't embarassing or 'not good enough'. When Aoki gets out of his own head a bit more, he stops being his own worst enemy and is able to properly appreciate the relationships he has. Like in the bit of volume 9 when Aoki finally tells his mother he's dating Ida. Even after the initial carelessness of Akkun, Okano's prejudice, the volleyball club's extreme (stressful) enthusiasm, Aoki finds the desire in him to be direct with her and tell her. Not only does he find the desire to be direct but the courage to be direct with someone he knows cares about him and his feelings, because he's slowly been able to do this with Ida. Aoki also rubs off on Ida, helping Ida grow as a character too, but this post is focused on Aoki after all, so I'll wrap this up soon.

Another quick point I'd like to make is that Aoki doesn't seem to overthink his interactions a lot with people he's not close with- reading about how casually nice Aoki was to Ida before the eraser incident is hilarious because of how genuinely unbothered Aoki seemed then. Aoki's confidence in doing things he thinks and/or assumes will help other people is near unmatched, like when he stepped up to be Cinderella in their class play or talked to Kokoro and her friends when the other boys were being awkward and silent, yet when it comes to confidence in genuinely communicating his own feelings, he has a long way to go. Going out of his way to help others is arguably partly Aoki's way of proving his own worth because of how much he cares about his friends being happy and fulfilled, and the series witnesses him learning to harness his own feelings towards other people so he can feel fulfilled too.

To conclude, I hope it doesn't sound like I think Aoki's insecurities define his character at all- heck they're so subtly included, they may even go unnoticed and you'd still get a good story. However, I still think they underpin every arc bringing Aoki closer to being an individual who is more bold and open with the people closest to him. He doesn't assume he has to give up because he isn't good enough anymore, and is more likely to be honest about his own feelings without always assuming the worst. Aoki is the sort of person enthralling and endearing to read about, but sometimes I feel like I would need infinite levels of patience to keep up with him in real life. Nonetheless, I appreciate him very much, and I appreciate the representation of him shooting himself in his foot by overthinking and comparing himself to who/what he "should" be, because that is something very relatable for many people and often at various points in their lives. At the end of the day though, this is all an interpretation, and I'm sure there are others to be made by anyone who cared enough to read this whole thing. In all his kind, high-strung, empathetic, impulsive glory, this one's to Aoki!

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 5 Meakashi pt. 19

blop

Excellent question, and probably not one worth dwelling on. Knowing this series though, probably yes. Another secret twin.

You know, people keep saying that. "There's no way Rika Furude would do something like this." But it's always people who don't know her at all, having only interacted with the god child a few times, and never really being with her for a significant length of time. Also, Shion, you threatened her with violence earlier in the day, are you really so surprised she reacted negatively to the threats?

Back at the very end of Watanagashi, when Ooishi is talking to Keiichi about how they found a syringe on Rika I didn't quite picture this level of a fight scene. I suspected it just went Rika ambushed what at the time we were told was Mion with the syringe, and Mion was able to just turn it around on her. Also, not to nitpick, they said they found the syringe on Rika, destroyed in her skirt pocket. I'm willing to write this small inconsistency off, because who would have known back in chapter two that they would use the sundress art and not her school uniform. But the idea that Shion put the syringe back in her pocket after this fight is just a bit too silly to take at face value. My theory for this is that Rika actually brought two syringes of the drug that makes you kill yourself just in case she had to take out both Mion and Shion. The second syringe got completely forgotten about because Shion turned the tables on her and took her down before she got the chance to use it. Or more than likely this was just a small oversight that got missed when writing this chapter, and I'm thinking way too hard about it.

Even at the lowest setting you have to figure that zapping the small child would put them out of commission for longer than the five seconds it seemed to do here. Unless whatever was in the syringe or natural adrenaline is just making Rika recover super quickly. Also, due to earlier screenshots planting the seeds I can't help but wonder who this Hanyuuu might be. Secret Furude child perhaps? Or is it just some sort of noise she makes similar to her meeps and nipahs?

Rika said no rematch. She's a one and doner. GG? No, bad G, no re.

You really gotta hand it to Rika, she doesn't do things halfway. Once again though I have to wonder if it's whatever was in the syringe, or just riding high off the adrenaline of the situation. I stub my toe and I feel like I have to go sit down and just die quietly for a minute, but here Rika slashes her own throat open and then rips it open still with her bare hands. That's dedication. Also, remember, this was the easy way out! Makes you wonder what tortures she envisioned Shion was going to use on her that cutting her own throat and just ripping it to shreds was the better alternative.

This does make me wonder though, why did the anime (I assume the other anime adaptations do it similarly) go with Rika stabbing the knife into her skull instead of the throat? Is it some sort of censorship thing do you think? Like to get it on broadcast they couldn't just have the small child stab herself in the neck, and the head was somehow the better option? Because the manga version of events also has her stab her throat and yank that bad boy open. So I'm just curious why the switch for the anime? Because it definitely isn't less gory than what the visual novel and manga did. Just one of those mysteries I guess. I'm half-tempted to post the manga version of some of these events, but I don't really know if I want to just be posting gore. But here's this:

[magicalyaku]

After the first week of February I decided I would only read sequels. I made true on that for a few books until my library app fucked me over and didn't download Simon Snow 3 which I intended to start reading during my break at work (where I have no internet). I was so mad! 8D I was sulking afterwards and started a different book once I got home and the resolution was broken. Instead the theme of the month can easily be "I have never read so many books with adult characters in a row."

Das Verbotene Kapitel / The Lost Plot (The Invisible Library 8) (Genevieve Cogman): I honestly wasn't too invested in this. I was like for the first two days, but the writing style of this series always takes so long to read for me. I used to like it, but right now I just lack the patience. Also, it's the eighth volume. High time for it to end, really. Halfway through I switched to the audiobook to listen to while gaming and well. I'm not good at listening while doing other things. Maybe I'll pick the book up again in a few years to give the second half a proper read. I was content though with what I heard of the end.

The High King's Golden Tongue (Tales of the High Court 1) (Megan Derr): I said "I need more fantasy buhu *sad face*". And then I looked at my TBR and realised that out of 50 books only 3 have absolutely no magic, ghosts, different worlds or planets or whatsoever. Uhm. Well. Errr ... That didn't stop me from going through this recommendation list for queer fantasy books. uAu" Found this book. Sounded alright. Read the preview pages. Sounded alright. Looked it up in the library, uhuh available immediately! Borrowed it. Read it for the remainder of the day and a few hours of the night. uAu~ I can safely say I had fun reading this book. It's not fantasy with magic and creatures, just old kingdoms full of queer people. The worldbuilding is good, with all the different regions and languages being a major plot point. I liked the adventure, the characters (Sarrica's and Lesto's friendship is great), the pining. Good times!

The Pirate of Fathoms Deep (Tales of the High Court 2) (Megan Derr): The follow-up to Golden Tongue! I was unsure at first if I wanted to read the sequels (there are of 5 volumes in the series at the moment), but vol 2 is about Lesto who was my favourite character in vol 1, so no choice. It's like that 5.5 chapter of a boys love manga though. In the 5 chapters of the main story everything is tame until the bonus 5.5 chapter where they can finally do things. In High Court 1, there's exactly one smut scene. In vol 2, there's a million. And the book is only half the size! D: There is a small adventure going on and given the setting it makes sense that it progresses the way it does, but the 3 books afterwards are full length again, so why is it only this one character who gets the short one? u_u He's happy in the end, so all is well, but I would have liked a little more. I guess I have to continue reading the next volumes in the hopes to get a few glimpses. u3u

Husband Material (Forever Material in the German edtion) (Alexis Hall): After two books with middle-aged man and their (amourous) adventures, we slowly inch back to the younger generation. From end-thirties to mid-twenties! Books written by adults for adults, you know. Adult problems. Brrrr. At least, it's funny. Silly even. Was the first one this silly? I think, Oliver and Luc did well sorting through their various issues. I enjoy Luc’s narrative voice. And I loved the ending! xD It must be such a sore point for many people but I was like HELL YEAH!!!

Out of Nowhere (In the Middle of Somewhere 2) (Roan Parrish): I already read the first and third volume of this series, so reading volume 2 was inevitable even though Colin was not the most likeable character in vol 1. And well, he has issues let me tell you. Daniel of vol 1 was a mess but he managed to get a new start and build something for himself in that place. Will of vol 3 may not have the healthiest lifestyle but he was not unhappy with the direction of his life before meeting Leo. Whereas Colin is absolutely miserable and has no idea what to do about it. It was intruiging to read how he and Rafe managed. You know, there's this thing about this kind of books where the characters meet exactly the kind of person they need to survive and to thrive. Even with all the shit going on in this particular one, it's still comforting. xD

Wayward Son (Simon Snow 2) (Rainbow Rowell): The gang is 20, so it doesn't break the streak! I had fun reading this. Curiously, I liked it better than volume 1. Not quite sure why. (Maybe because of Suffering Boys.) Volume 1 was interesting in the way it felt like the 8th season of a series you haven't seen any episodes of before. Now this is the rare look at what happens to the heroes after the series ends and I'm here for it. I also found it remarkable how Baz was described as that utmost evil and ruthless being at first and turns out now he is the most loving and patient boyfriend of all times. xD

Pictures of You (Tina Winter): German author here. It's very basic in the theme and kind of predictable. But in a comforting way. Sometimes it's nice to know where everything will go so you can just lean back and enjoy the ride. The characters were pretty good and the setting was well illustrated. I mentioned last month that my visualisation abilites are not very good but I had no problem seeing the photos the protagonist takes which was pretty neet! I also very much appreciated how all the important conflicts actually happen and are resolved! That’s not a given. xD

Ring of Solomon (Aden Polydoros): I like Mr Polydoros' other books and I appreciate very much how all his books are different from each other. This one is contempory middle grade with a touch of magic. It was pretty okay, but I think it could have been a little bit deeper, a little more ambitious or challenging or complicated. Just more. Yes, it's middle grade but kids are always smarter than adults give them credit for, right? I feel, if you really want them to adore a book you have to give them something challenging that is a little bigger than themselves so that they can grow into it.

Reforged (Seth Haddon): Another gay king+knight story that made me realise I very much have a weakness for this kind of setting. xD Which is so weird because when I look through YA books and see a heroine who is a queen or princess fighting for her kingdom I immediately click away ... Well. This was a solid book. Not quite as joyful as A Taste of Gold and Iron or The High King's Golden Tongue but still solid (also it's a debut). The author clearly put thought and love into his main characters and probably the worldbuilding. Sometimes it was just written in a way that confused me at first, because the actual thing was named late. There's that other paladin guy who works alongside our hero. When he's introduced, it's written "They never got along." and then 90 pages later: "Now that XX was dead, he was his closest friend" And I was like "What?! I thought you hate each other? Did I read wrong? Let me leaf back real quick!" I mean, there is the possibility that among all those people he doesn't get along with this one is still the best but ... that's kinda sad. 8D So, there's small things like that. But the overall story and intrigue was well done I think.

Keeper of the Lost Cities 2: Exile (Shannon Messenger): I stayed at my parents's place for a few days to take care of the cats and thus my commute to work was twice as long as usual, so this came in from the library at just the right time. I listened to the audiobook though, so it was still a struggle for the first 8 hours. I'm so bad with audiobooks. 8D But the beginning was also very slow. It picked up speed around the halfway point, I'd say and also Keefe is my favourite character so I appreciated hearing more of him. I still find it a little odd how some of the characters' attitude towards Sophie is. Guys, she's only thirteen and didn't know about her powers for the longest time! How do you expect her to be perfect at everything and solve everything this very second? Geez. I'll probably continue with the 3rd volume at some point but I should really think about reading it instead of listening. :'D

On to the next month! As of writing this I already have read the best book of March, I swear. xD I’m possibly still high enough to even make a fanart happen.

[kirchefuchs]

so remember

t h i s post

I recently overcame it while scrolling down your blog (I totally wasn't looking for some of my old ideas to bring back to life pfffffff totally) and I just had a thought

What if we switched the roles?

The Narrator — aka, Pollux — has the Lovebug virus and Stanley is completely normal. The same thing that happened in the post happens in this too, but with the roles switched, I can't help but feel like it hits harder (especially considering your AU)

(I love your AU ok it's so creative)

If you acknowledge that Stanley basically did everything in his power to make Pollux sentient, wouldn't that mean that him losing the very thing keeping him that way to be a great loss? All that work, down the drain, in one fell swoop — and Stanley didn't even get to say goodbye.

Imagine the devastation he felt — the overwhelming guilt, and he won't even be punished for it. Imagine having to accept that all of your work is just, gone. No countdown. No "3, 2, 1." It's gone. Imagine going through the worst depression of your life while the only one who was there for you doesn't even understand anymore. Imagine having to live through what Pollux once was without him even knowing that his whole being was permanently reset.

And the worst part was that Stanley loved him back.

Imagine the only person you've ever been with to fade away in the blink of an eye. Imagine that certain person not even being in their normal state at the time — Pollux was infected by the Lovebug virus, after all.

And imagine his last words being I love you.

Imagine having to look back at those memories and realize just how stupid you were being by lashing out. Imagine being Stanley, whose last and only memory of the man he loved being one where he isn't even himself.

Imagine being Stanley, where your story ends in a hiatus.

And in the end, there was nothing true to finish the narrative.

There's no goodbye

only a scripted confession.

anyway have a nice day and I hope you enjoy your new brainrot which I totally won't joining you in hahshdhdhgd!!

— 🅰️non || 06/13/2023

I'm fine. I'm normal about this.

Anyways.... I'd like to give you some advice if you do want to join me in my Trigun phase.

I am currently in the process of reading the manga, but I have watched both anime series and the movie. So here's what I recomend.

I don't think it super matters is your read the manga first or anything, but it is important that you watch the 1998 Trigun anime before you watch Trigun Stampede (2023). The movie takes place somewhere in the middle of the 1998 anime so you can watch it after the anime if you want or halfway though, it doesn't matter.

The order I went with was pretty much this. I've just started the manga.

Trigun 1998 (show)

Trigun: Badlands Rumble (movie)

Trigun Stampede (show)

Trigun (manga)

Trigun Maximum (manga)

Warning: while this fandom does seem silly goofy (which I'm not saying it isn't silly goofy. It is very silly goofy, however) it will make you cry. The further you get in the sadder it gets. Vash needs a break, therapy, and some donuts. So, there's that warning.

As for where to watch and read it, I used zoro.to to watch both shows and the movie and am using trigunmanga.com to read the manga. The legality of it all is pretty ehhhh, but I don't really have the money buy physical copies of the manga even though I really want to.

Hope this helps! Imma go die from the brain damage Trigun and The Stanley Parable have inflicted upon me ♡