#and im happy to say im learning so much!!!
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gamblersdoll · 3 days ago
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can you write something about midoriya, bakugou, shoto todoroki, Karishima and kaminari being subs? tyy<3
these are mostly hcs, but here you go!
midoriya is of course a sweet thing, its more common for him to actually just let you use him and hed be happy with it. he’s just “she could step on me and id say sorry.” he also just rolls his eyes when you give him head, so how can he deny you to climb ontop of him and ride him?
bakugou.. he has to warm up first. hes so used to being a bitch, so, he acts like a brat at first, denying you to make him feel good. he wants to make you feel good, so how the fuck can he do that when he’s a bottom? he learns quickly that if he just listened and stop being so stuck up.. it feels so much better. even when hes balls deep and ontop of you, hes a mess. hes all whimpers and shivers and hes the one fucking you.
shoto, hes frankly new to sex, so he hasnt figured out what he likes. hell, he isnt really a sexual person, so him leaning to a bottom is a possibility. big but! he does like that thing you do when you throat him , lick his balls, then go lower and jerk him slow. it feels too damn good— where and how did you even learn that? what made it feel so good to him? he didnt know, its still so new. of course though.. it catches him off guard and hes covering his mouth so he isnt too loud.
now KIRI, my favorite, hes into the muzzle. he likes being considered a mutt that only gets rewarded when hes behaving well. he has a love hate relationship with the facial garment, hes just sometimes a teether and doesnt know when not to bite you. his protests of “please, no no,i promise i wont bite you again” to “use me, make me dumb, im just a mutt and toy for your usage.” praise!! he loves it, he melts and will almost cream on the spot. (not unless you tell him to, then he’s slowing down to ask permission)
now kami? hes a switch, dont get me wrong, but he loves being used. you could be riding him and he has those dildo thruster machines going into his hole. and hes more into the bdsm thing than anyone else.. its lowkey how kirishima got into the muzzle, but he likes the idea of having fingers down his throat, hands and feet tied to the bed, and occasionally slapping him. (he sometimes short circuits, so you have to be careful.)
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louisferrignojr · 2 days ago
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*deep breath*
the thing is. the fucking thing is.
it's not unrealistic for someone to not dig deeper into their queer identity beyond what they know to be true, which might be "yeah i might be attracted to people of the same gender but i dont have time to get into that right now 'cause life is complicated and i'm in a relationship/i'm not interested in dating right now anyway so what does it matter"
(same goes for figuring out your gender identity. exhibit A:
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[image description: a tweet by shaka (@/ScaredAsian) that says, “im probably nonbinary but i have a job so idrc about that rn”. In plain text, it says, “I’m probably nonbinary but I have a job so I don’t really care about that right now.” /end id])
but this doesn't work for evan buckley
who had his little freakout on his first date with tommy and went to talk to his sister who literally told him "now you're more than an ally" and that maybe he's not sure of his feelings but he'll figure them out. (sidenote: she should have said identity instead of feelings. but whatever.)
who has been in a relationship with his boyfriend for six months
who has been known to go on research binges because he has a curious mind and loves learning. tommy's sarcastic "oh good, you found a substack" tells us everything we need to know, y'all.
who has at least one very close queer friend and co-worker, hen fucking wilson; and one friend/acquaintance who is a queer man (we don't know how much he sees josh outside of visiting maddie at dispatch, and like, that one time he hang out with him and maddie and chimney, so it's a little bit up to fanon to decide if they're friend-friends but at the end of the day it is a trusted person and an openly gay man. i mean, we saw how josh stood up for tommy, and schooled the fuck out of buck. finally, a conversation about being queer between two canonically queer characters! only took 8 seasons, huh! i digress.)
and have i mentioned he's been dating his boyfriend for six months? like, if he was ever to have a conversation about being queer... tommy is right there. tommy opened up about his own experience figuring out his sexuality and coming out on their very first date and moreover reassured buck it's okay if he's feeling a little tense about them being out on a date in a public place.
point being: there are people in his life who would be more than happy to talk to him about his newfound identity outside of his relationship with tommy.
taking all of these things into consideration: it's not only inconsistent with the character they have established, but the timeline of it is also really fucking messed up.
and more than that: any faith i may have had in this show to handle a delicate matter like a character exploring their newfound sexuality has flown out the window. they broke the audience's trust with 8x06. i'm not interested in seeing how they're going to move this story forward, because 8x06 was such a particular fuck up, beginning to end, wrt the bucktommy storyline.
and honestly? knowing the format 911 follows, as a network procedural: this is not the right medium to tell this story, at this point in the timeline, because it has become way more complicated than it would have been in s7, immediately following buck's bisexual awakening.
tldr: the premise is sound but the execution is so bad it's practically unsalvageable within the scope of the show (but very manageable in fanfiction, where you can dwell in the character's headspace and dig into what goes on beyond the things they say and do. godspeed, everyone <3)
partly inspired by @firehose118's tags on their post and partly like, being queer. source: dude trust me
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lenaswritingandstuff · 3 days ago
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Being James' sister and dating Regulus ◼ HEADCANONS
Requested: Yes ("dating regulus head cannons? but as James potters sister 🫣" - Anon)
Characters: Regulus Black, James Potter (+y/n)
Warnings: Fluff; English is not my first language
A/N: Thank you anon for the request, and sorry for the delay! This will include also the pre-dating stage as well. SORRY FOR THE TYPOS. Comments and feedback are always appreciated. Enjoy! ^^
Tag list: @helendeath @im-jesus @wolfyychan @blocked-zombieartist
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When you entered Hogwarts, you were sorted into Gryffindor like you older brother James, which made you both very happy
As a Gryffindor, you didn’t have Slytherin friends, but you didn’t really hate them either
You and Regulus properly met when you were partnered in potions, and you were surprised of how nice and polite he actually was
After that class, you started talking a bit with him every time you shared a class, and soon you started to hang out in the library or in the courtyard
You wrote to him during the holidays, and made sure James didn’t know
You hung out more and more with Regulus in secret, and after a while realized you were having feelings for him. You
Unbeknown to you, Regulus already had feelings for you 
After a while, you contemplated telling Regulus about your feelings, but you thought he wouldn’t want to date a girl who wasn’t in Slytherin
But to your great surprise, he invited you to the Yule ball and you gladly accepted
The night of the Yule Ball, James was shocked to see you two together and angrily confronted you, saying Regulus being in Slytherin wasn’t the problem, but his views on pure-blood purity and wizards being superior to Muggles 
You were surprised to learn it, and told him Regulus never talked to you about it, and had been nothing but kind to you
However, you still talked to Regulus about it on private, and he assured you that what his family thought didn’t matter, and that he cared greatly about you and didn’t want to lose what you had
You said you had to think about it, but as you turned around to leave, he grabbed your arm and kissed you passionately 
“You had no idea for long I wanted to do this…How many times I imagined this moment…”
And that’s when you realized there was mistletoe over you two
He then asked you to be his girlfriend, and you obviously said yes
You decided to tell James right away, so he could see how awesome Regulus was
James wasn’t happy but accepted it, but Sirius tried to tell you Regulus wasn’t good for you, but you refused to listen to him, and Regulus was very thankful for that
Regulus was the best boyfriend you could ask for
He loved to cuddle, to hold you at night
Not much on PDA at first, but with time had no problem kissing you in public
He defended you against his friends - and you did the same
He always got you gifts and took you out on dates
Your parents quickly became fond of him, and you always invited him during the holidays - much to Sirius’ annoyance 
When James realized how happy Regulus made you, he decided to be cordial to him during the holidays, but things remained the same at Hogwarts 
When you and Regulus got married, James accepted to be your witness and was genuinely happy for you
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Want to be on the permanent tag-list or for specific characters/fandoms? Feel free to use my Ask-Box! ^^
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nknoxe-n · 1 day ago
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➤THEY'RE CHEAP {im free}
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synopsis: Shidou Ryusei dating headcannons because we luv himwarnings: none besides shidou being himself w.c 400
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boyfriend!ryusei who wants to be your human safe space, no judgment with him, the embarrassing parts of human nature are the most exciting, he would do a 'hear me out' cake with you.
boyfriend!ryusei that always wants to make you smile no matter what, he'll tease you, make a fool out of himself, constantly sending you funny video's, he wants to smile and laugh with you.
boyfriend!ryusei who always wants to be touching you, he isn’t shy about PDA; he’s more than happy to show the world that he’s with you, because he's so, so proud you're his.
boyfriend!ryusei who is your personal hype man, he would be the first to push you to chase your dreams, but he’d do it in his unique way, encouraging you to go big and not worry about the risks. He’s all about following his own instincts, and he'd want the same for you, hyping you up like you’re a superstar.
boyfriend!ryusei that might be a little too blunt, he won't be sugarcoating things for you, he is brutally honest about everything, completely believes in only saying things you mean and that lying is a waste of time.
boyfriend!ryusei who will be your best friend all the time, you two are shit talking other people together, giggling and eating your favourite snacks while a movie plays in the background that you both wanted to watch but got too caught up yapping to each other.
boyfriend!ryusei painting your nails his favourite colour and letting you do his eyeliner, he sometimes 'borrows' your skincare products as well because he says yours smell better.
boyfriend!ryusei who would throw hands for you any day but would prefer you learn how to defend yourself without him and on that note, also would love play fighting with you whenever he can, it gives him an adrenaline rush/
boyfriend!ryusei that calls you so late it's actually the early hours of the morning when he can't sleep, you have deep talks about everything and anything, he wants to share his biggest fears and dreams with you.
boyfriend!ryusei who genuinely cherishes you so much and wants to spend every moment with you making memories and having fun, doing things that makes both of you happy because he loves you.
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westywallowing · 11 months ago
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thinking about marinette and how passionate about sustainable fashion she would be. always keeping scraps of fabric to use as stuffing or fibers so she never wastes anything- donating all the clothes she doesn't wear anymore or that doesn't fit her personally to children and women's shelters so she knows they aren't being redistributed for greed- buying from local artists and designers and seamstresses to support their small businesses- teaching her friends and family how to patch holes in clothes or how to properly wash and take care of them so less clothing is thrown out in her community :')
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crescentfool · 1 year ago
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orpheus and thanatos 💚
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parasitoidism · 5 months ago
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SMTIV English Artbook Scans
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Today, I was able to finish scanning my entire English SMTIV art book! This book is weirdly hard to find so I'm glad I was able to do this, and I hope that everyone enjoys being able to read the official translation of this incredible art book!
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liauditore · 6 months ago
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BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY! BDUBS DAY!
#hermitaday#bdubs fanart#bdouble0 fanart#hermitcraft fanart#hermitblr#my art#bdubs#im so happy#a day where i get to draw bdubs is a good day#my favourite guy. lich rally.#this is one of the softer bdubs i've drawn i think..#as much as high energy matches him 99% of the time idk idk he's so sweet that 1% of the time#and this season rlly has me feeling that. secret life rlly changed alot of these mfs in my head.#secret life is such amazing pay off for the whole life series im always saying tihs#anyway yeah insanity aside his builds this season have been so incredible i know bdubs builds are bdubs builds but like. wow#i think we should all appreciate idk. the way he plays w/ scale#makes a tiny box house that's like 6 blocks tall and it somehow looks so detailed like if you squint it could be an oil painting#and those trees. idk what else to say man. those trees.#anyway (insanity goggles on again) bdubs living far off happily in his cottage a bit off the grid. makes me so happy.#idk. bdubs learning to chill. it's so awesome.#his interactions with etho joel and pearl have been so cool to see#ethubs is gonna ethubs#but him and pearl are so funny together too. i love the kinda? sheepishness he talks to her with lol#and joel. i haven't quite figured out exactly what's going on between him and joel but i like it.#i think. bdubs wants to hit joel with sticks. but in like. an oh you rascal kinda way. little troublemaker you#i don't fuck with familial headcanons and I don't like assigning people parental roles. But.#coughs. okay that's enough.#i love bdubs alot he's my favourite. good night guys.
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luck-of-the-drawings · 7 months ago
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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chiquilines · 1 month ago
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op you are the only person on this entire website feeding me Miryumi. Bless, and keeep making more jbsjhbcsbcjkdzb its so fucking gpood and ima soa hungry
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My one job is keeping the miryumi community well fed and by god am i committed
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dukeofthomas · 4 months ago
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I need people to realize how horrible 'stalking/constant surveillance/breaking into each other's homes is how the Batfamily show love' is. Like i really need someone to just acknowledge how horrific saying this bullshit is.
Like even fics where they're shown as happy and healthy and with good ties, you've always got this thing where none of them have privacy or any boundaries with each other. Which is directly antithetical to actually having good relationships. And this invasion via hacking and stalking and breaking into homes is portrayed as a positive, good thing; it's just how they show love and care to each other, after all. But for some reason I just personally don't find stalking, lack of privacy or boundaries, and emotional manipulation funny, endearing, or healthy, and just end up disgusted at the attempt to sweep it all under the rug.
#my dc posting#dc#batman#batfamily#jason todd#barbara gordon#bruce wayne#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#listen i can only take so much of it before i just breakdown okay#apparently controversial opinion but a family where its normal to vreak into each others homes and manipulate each other and stalk and#invade boundaries and autonomy and privacy can NOT be healthy#no matter how much you try to dress it up all cute w 'this is just how they are' 'its how they show their love' its never not gonna be#unhealthy and bad and toxic#like yeah they do do that. they are like that. either acknowledge it or stop trying to justify it#god this actually irks me so much#i try to idk. suspend my disblief but theres only so much i can actuallt fucking take before just#its just. im trying to read happy fluffy fics. but i cant be comforted by a family that normalizes breaking boundaries n invading privacy#and its specifically that the author aleays disregards it. instead of fixing it or making it better they opt to keep it and come up w excuse#s for it#and thats what actually triggers me#'i broke into ur house cus if i asked if i could come over ud say no' is actuallt fucking horrifying stop trying to make it seem loving???#im writing this while having a panic attack dont mind me 👍#but its like. if you can write the batfam w/o bruce hitting his kids or any other horrific thing that they do#then why must you keep the boundary&privacy breaking? why cant anyone even seemingly try to write a batfam#where theyve worked their issues abt this out best they can n have healthy established boundaries w each other??#like if u can write them all hanging out together 24/7 n bruce being s good dad why is this one simple thing the One Thing#nobody even tries to address properly???#'aw dick broke into jason's saehouse bc he wanted to hangout but jason would say no if he asked' aw. maybe dick should learn 'no means no'
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hinamie · 4 months ago
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do u have any tips for uhh idk art term....highlight and contour but for art? specifically w digital art? w pencil and paper it feels super intuitive but then when i switch to digital it looks all flat.............
(is it shading? idk what im doing tbsh)
(also hope ur doing well i feel like im crawling into ur asks every two days or smth looking for art tips sorry T_T)
(yuuji comic made me cry so hard btw)
hi rin!!!!!!! that wld be shading/rendering yes hgbhgfjs there’s no One specific term tho so ur all good <3 also omg re: the yuuji comic IM SORRY I KEEP MAKING U CRY GHJKGJDSGHKJ its ok i made a lot of people cry if the death wishes/pos in the tags are anything 2 go by so ur in good company :D i teared up also
i would Also like to apologize in advance because fr me this is one of those Art Things that becomes more intuitive the more u do it so i am a bit. lost as 2 how to explain but i will sukuna voice ganbare ganbare !!!!
it’s all about light sources babes so pick a direction where the light is hitting from and use that as your main point of reference. If u need to remind yourself where the light is coming from i was taught to draw a lil arrow or sun somewhere on your canvas 2 keep track . areas closest to the light or planes that are more Elevated will be brighter than areas farther away or Deeper. When u think of a face, the forehead and cheeks rest Higher than fr example, the eye sockets, so those areas will catch more light and appear brighter. it /is/ kind of like makeup in that way. 
also, shadows/highlights can have soft or hard edges depending on how . uh . intense, i guess?? the angle of the light is. like with a box vs a sphere, the former will have a lot more Cut and Defined areas of darkness because the plane where light hits is cut off more directly by the presence of a corner, whereas with a sphere the Slope means that the values follow more of a gradient. 
tbh tho if you’re still starting out, to practice light sources and shading it actually might be good to scribble and shade some 3D shapes and spheres/boxes or maybe even draw from life so u can really take time 2 pay attn to how light catches different surfaces . it’s boring work but the practice is never wasted !! lighting can be tricky so try and take the time 2 form Good habits :'> references r ur friends here now more than ever.
other than that, which i feel more or less covers the basics n fundamentals, my wisdoms 2 u and any1 else who will have it: INVEST TIME IN2 FINDING GOOD BRUSHES omg i feel like a lot of that New Artist Look (tm) comes from using default brushes —which on its own is fine, but the kicker is not taking time to get comfortable with how to make the best use of them. the fun of the render is getting to play with textures and colours so find some brush settings that help add a bit of personality!! also . resist defaulting 2 the airbrush tool to shade it Rarely cooperates and can muddy a piece. uhhhh what else what else try not to shade with black for the same reasons ???? i'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here but i hope something here was of any value :'>>
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jimahalangel · 2 months ago
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okay so I just got back from the Drawfee live-show (incredible I had such a good time🩵🩵🩵🩵 probably gonna be talking about it for a while)
and I wanted to post pics of my Todd (From Mario) shirt that I made last week because everyone was so nice and seemed to like it :D
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this was the shirt straight off the embroidery hoop before I realized that Todd's hat looks a little like a penits and had to fix it lol
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and this is it the night of the show!
(bonus my brother and I took a picture with Julia):
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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year ago
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hold on i need to get a thought and emotions out. so with Welcome Home, there seems to be a before and an after. obviously, we're in the after. the website is the after. and if it turns out that the story we see, the one where shit hits the fan and the show is practically erased, then... that already happened. whatever horrors we see, we'll know that there is no saving them. there is no happy ending - it happened, and it's tragic. the show is doomed to end and be scrubbed away. if any of the characters are revealed to be dead/gone by the website, then when/if we see them at an earlier point, we'll Know
and there's a special kind of dread and horror in that for us, the audience.
#im not articulating this the way i want to...#it's like going to see a tragic play. like romeo and juliet for instance.#we go into it knowing the end. they die. no matter what they die. every step they take leads to That End#every happy moment is undercut by the knowledge that it won't last#thinking about this makes me think that at some point learning more about the story/characters is gonna feel like digging up a grave#AGH I LOVE IT THOUGH I LOVE IT. IT HURTS SO MUCH BUT I LOVE IT#its a special feeling of dread/nostalgia/bittersweetness/resignation#and that is sensation in the chest that doesnt feel good but it also does somehow? it hurts but just enough to not be unbearable?#welcome home#welcome home speculation#welcome home puppet show#man i am so so so so scared for the puppets lmfao#i have some theories on the ways shit might go down. like little things. souring relationships and such#i also have a feeling that the story is really gonna hit home (ha) for me in Big Ways#like as soon as i saw clown say that it's kinda about 'when does a home become a house' and stuff#OOF. YIKES. WHEN DOES IT INDEED. i mean i know. ive lived it. im Living it.#this is gonna get unintentionally personal Real Fast in Several Fun And Festive Ways for me huh#i wonder if the story is gonna be uncovered linearly or not...#chewing on it chewing on it chewing on it#i can't wait to Understand the world/characters so that i can write fanfic. i want to so badly. i want to Explore#i want to hop into that grave and keep digging
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icewindandboringhorror · 6 days ago
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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logicpng · 8 months ago
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haha nice
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