#and if they're ever actually going out to eat or not
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Declan O'Hara imagine - I'm not doing this.
A/N: I thought about this one shot weeks ago... finally writing it. Probably been done already by someone else but who isn't obsessed with rivals atm. I also haven't written in years.
Summary: Declan is fighting against himself and everything he believes in when you come into the picture.
Warnings: Age Gap, fem!reader, NSFW content 18+, strong language, bit of a slow burn.
"Taggie, honestly, I don't know why you'd ever willingly add Brussel sprouts to anything." You chuckled as you both crept through the door to the kitchen.
"They're good for you!" Taggie tried to defend her culinary choices for her Sunday lunch.
"If they're good for you then I always want to be bad."
"Who's being bad?" A thick Irish accent filled the room as Taggie's dad sauntered in, a mug of coffee in one hand with his other burrowed deeply into his trouser pocket.
"Dad, this is (Y/N). (Y/N) was just objecting to my sprouts."
"Oh yeah, I agree, terrible things. Even the dog won't eat 'em" Declan brought his mug to his lips, smirking through the thick moustache that hid his upper lip.
You felt your insides alight at his dark, playful expression as he teased Taggie.
That was the first time you knew you were a bad friend. A bad friend who wanted your new friend's father to lift you onto the kitchen table and bury his head between your thighs.
The thought made your cheeks burn red as you laughed at Declan's remark and Taggie's complaints against him.
The man left the kitchen when his eyes flitted back to you, sending you a nod and a 'lovely to meet you, (Y/N). '
You couldn't help but replay the way he said your name in your head over and over and over again until you were desperate for his voice to sing it again.
The next time you saw Declan O'Hara was at the O'Hara New Years Eve party.
"You better not spend the whole time in here. I'd actually like you to put a dress on and come out to dance at some point tonight." You pleaded with Taggie as she clasped your necklace for you.
"I'll try but I can't make any promises. Anyway, you're out there to be my eyes and ears. You need to tell me if anyone complains about the food, okay?"
"Yes, Taggie. But no one will because you are amazing and your food is amazing and you are so right for not letting me help you cook or serve after I burnt the soup last time." You faced her as she continued to prep the ingredients she would need for the feast she had planned.
"You are a great friend but you are a terrible cook." Taggie agreed. You felt a lump in your throat at the words. Were you a great friend for literally fantasising over her father after almost every time you had an interaction with him? "Now please go next door and make sure that all the tables have the right cutlery for me?"
"Anything for you, Agatha!" You headed to do as you were told. Looking down to smooth out your dress when you felt yourself collide with something solid.
"I'm so sorry!" You looked up to see Declan turning, laughing softly at your clumsiness.
"It's okay, love." Declan's own eyes fell down your body, his lips parting slightly as he took in the sight of you all dressed up. He knew you were an attractive girl but you were Taggie's age and one of her only friends in the surrounding neighbours beside Lizzie. "You look beautiful."
The sincerity in his voice caused a chill to roll up your spine.
"Thanks. You look very handsome too, Mr. O'Hara." You didn't know why you felt so shy around him. You were so used to owning your space and holding your confidence when you fancied someone.
"That's very kind, (Y/N). And it's Declan. I don't want to tell you again." Declan send you a wink as he started to pass you. "Hey, and no snogging my son at midnight. You're way too good for him."
Your heart squeezed at the taunt. Patrick was a gorgeous boy and he had tried to flirt with you when he met you but you were far too interested in Declan for Patrick to make any dent in your crush.
"He's not my type anyway." You managed to find your tongue to quip back an answer.
"Good girl."
Good Girl.
You had to bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself replying something entirely inappropriate in response.
As the night went on, you felt your heart drop more and more. Declan was obsessed with his wife. His wife was obsessed with anyone else.
You were desperate to try and make more conversation with the man but almost everyone was grabbing his attention to discuss some work matter or other.
As the countdown began, you gut wrenchingly watched as Maud and Declan kiss. You put on a smile and exchanged celebrations with those around you. Giving Lizzie a kiss on the cheek as her husband blanked her as he usually did.
"Happy New Year, chicken." Lizzie pressed on a faux smile as you did.
"Happy New Year, Lizzie."
"A little advice for your new years resolution if I may?" Lizzie whispered as she drew you closer.
"You may want to get better at hiding your admiration for Taggie's father. I know nothing hurts more than something you can't have." Lizzie's words took you back, you felt your cheeks burning red and your smile drop.
"Oh, Lizzie, I'm mortified! Please don't tell Taggie." You begged.
"Not a peep." Lizzie motioned locking her lips with a key before grabbing your hands to singing sway along with the room.
The night went on and Lizzie tried to encourage you to join in festivities. You drank more and more, being forced away whenever you tried to help Taggie wash up, and you soon found yourself needing some quiet time.
You let yourself into Declan's office, leaning against the desk, fingers gripping the underside to give you some stability when the room started to ever so slightly spin.
You closed your eyes. Inhaling a shaky breath when you heard the door creek open.
"I thought someone unwanted had decided to sneak through my things." Declan's melodic accent forced your eyes open.
"I'm wanted, am I?" You smirked slightly, through the sickness as your eyelids closed again.
Declan didn't respond. Instead he just studied you from across the room. His hands in his pockets, his stance leaning back just ever so slightly.
"You struggling there?" Declan was amused at your state.
You tried to push yourself off the desk but instead felt yourself stumble forward.
Declan's amusement quickly turned into concern as he stepped forward to catch you.
"Steady on." Declan had managed to stop you from hitting the floor, your face pressed against his chest, his strong arms engulfing you as he pulled you up towards him.
"I'm so sorry..." You mumbled as you leant away to look up at him.
His features were so strong up close. You could smell the whisky on his breath as your eyes lingered on his lips.
"Maybe we should get you some water and put you to bed."
Declan's words drew your eyes to his own. His chest seemed to go tight as he starred down into your glassy (Y/E/C) eyes.
"You can take me to bed any time you want, Mr O'Hara." Your words slurred together with your weak attempt of drunkenly flirting.
"It's Declan."
"Okay, Declan..."
That was the first time Declan had heard you say his name. Something inside him knew he wanted to hear you say it again but he fought against the thought, pulling away from you as you gained your stance.
"Let's hope you don't remember this in the morning, ay?" Declan tried to make light, convincing himself the electric feeling he had was nothing.
"Why? I finally got my chance in your arms. My dream come true."
"Yeah, you really won't want to remember this in the morning. Come on..." Declan opened the door, waiting for you to follow suite. The noise of the party echoed around you; you had almost forgot it was still going on outside.
"Have you ever thought about me?" You had no idea where this liquid confidence had stirred from.
There was a pause before he answered.
"No." He was lying. He knew he was lying. He watched the disappoint subtly encase your eyes as you pursed your lips into a thin smile.
"If I was dreaming, you would've said yes. Goodnight, Mr O'Hara."
"Goodnight, (Y/n)."
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As the weeks went on, rivals became friends. Friends became rivals. You grew closer to the O'Hara family and the moment from NYE had simply been forgotten. Or so you thought...
The dread that had filled your gut that New Years Day after you remembered the incident brewed inside of you for weeks. You had successfully avoided Declan, only seeing him in group scenarios and meetings for Venturer.
"(Y/N), I left some of my flyers on the table in the living room if you want to use them." Taggie climbed into her car, shouting over at you as she rushed off. You both had been going door to door for Venturer in different areas to cover more ground but you had run out of flyers to hand out.
"Thanks, Tag!" You rushed inside, running through the house that still held a cool air inside despite the early summer warmth outside.
"Careful!" You heard a voice proclaim as your bodies hit.
Within the blink of an eye, you had hit the floor with a body on top of you.
"Are you alright?" Declan groaned as you winced underneath his weight. The hard floor sent a wave of pain through your back but you had managed to not hit your head.
"Ow." You grumbled, squeezing your eyes shut.
"Did you hit your head?" Declan propped himself up on his arms, examining your face with a furrowed brow of worry.
"No." Was all you managed to say.
"I thought we had left bumping into each other for last year." Declan recalled on when you knocked into him last New Years Eve before the party had started.
"Clearly I'm not very good at keeping to New Year's resolutions."
Declan chuckled, pushing himself up before offering his hand.
You felt the warmth of his body leave you and the coldness of the floor pierce your bones.
You took his hand; hauling yourself to your feet.
"You sure you're okay?" Declan insisted. His hand reached out to take grip of your waist, his thumb and finger burning against your skin that had been revealed by the edge of your venturer top riding up. His other finger waved past your eyes, checking for concussion.
"I'm fine. No more running in the house with blind corners." You took a step back from the man, straightening your shirt to try and control the lingering feeling of the mans hand on you.
"Now... are we okay?" Declan rephrased,
"What do you mean?"
"(Y/N), don't play stupid. You've avoided me for almost half a year now. You won't even walk around the house without Caitlin or Taggie next to you."
You didn't think that Declan would've noticed with how busy he was with work and his life. Why would he have cared where you were or what you were doing in the house?
"I'm still living down my behaviour at New Years." You reluctantly admitted.
"What, that? Everyone says stuff they shouldn't when they've had a few too many. Doesn't mean you have to never look me in the eye again."
"What I said was completely inappropriate."
"Yes, it was. You're the same age as my daughter and I'm a married man but I'll have to admit I'm a little flattered." Declan tried his best to ease your anxiety. "I don't exactly see myself a teenage heart throb."
"I'm not a teenager." You bit back, the harshness your voice surprising you both.
"There's not much difference. You're practically a child and should be going for someone your own age." Declan quit the joking tone he had been using, taken back by your defence.
"Don't call me a child. I'm not the same age as Caitlin. I am older than Taggie and I've been with men before so I'm not playing silly little girl games over here. This isn't some school girl crush on a handsome teacher. You're right my feelings for you are inappropriate because you're a married man and I'm friends with your daughter but not because of my age. I know who I am and what I feel." A fire lit up your chest as you finally had broken out of the timidness you hated.
"You have no idea what you're talking about." Declan took a step closer to you, his stare burning into you as he lowered his voice.
"You're the one who reads people. Tell me what you see in me." You matched him, standing so close to him you could feel his breath on your face as you gritted your teeth.
The air was thick. The silence of the house engulfing you both, your breath audible and quick. You thought you could almost hear your heart thudding against your chest.
Declan was the one to break away. Storming to his office with a hard slam of the door.
How did your conversation turn so heated?
That night Declan tossed and turned, his head filled with moments of you. He rolled over and gently woke up his wife with soft strokes on her shoulder blades.
"What?" Maud hummed, rolling her head over her shoulder to Declan.
"I'm awake." Declan pressed himself against his wife.
"I can feel that." Maud looked at him through a sleepy gaze.
"Let me touch you." His fingers glided over her skin until he reached the space between her legs. Maud moaned quietly as Declan began to part her folds with his finger.
"Declan..." Maud sighed as she pressed her backside into him, feeling his member hard against her.
Declan wasted no time in entering her. He closed his eyes as his dick pressed inside his wife. And all he could see through the darkness was your eyes looking up at his. The first time he had seen you in the kitchen. The bump in the hall, the incident in his study, every time he had caught you intensely listening to one of his speeches to the group, the crash against the floor. You underneath him. The tiny bit of skin his hand had managed to caress from the bottom of your shirt.
He had never thought of you before. Not with Maud, not with his own hand and imagination and he couldn't make sense of why that night he finished almost as fast as his inexperienced teenage self had once before.
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It had been Declan's turn to avoid you from that day. He couldn't be too close to you without feeling his throat go dry, a sickening guilt and twisting conflict rising with it.
It was the evening you'd find out whether Venturer was a real contender against Corrinium.
The O'Hara house was filled with people eagerly waiting except one who had decided to leave the house for good.
The house erupted in cheers and celebrations as the phone call confirmed it for you all.
You watched through the window as Maud drove off, leaving Declan and Taggie behind.
"We did it!" Taggie squeezed you tightly before embracing her father and to your surprise, Declan had also pulled you into a tight hug. You had hoped no one picked up on the slight awkwardness that left the embrace when Declan moved onto join the others. You couldn't help but feel it.
The party went on and you tried to keep an eye on Declan without making it too obvious (like Rupert and Taggie had failed to).
When Rupert left Declan's side for another whiskey, (Taggie swiftly disappearing just after), Declan slipped away to his study. You followed.
"I'm sorry about Maud." You made your presence known as you watched him place his glass down on the desk, his back to you when he replied.
"Don't."
"Fine." You clenched your jaw, unsure of what to say next at the warning in his tone.
"What do you want from me?" Declan's voice had a hint of desperation. He turned to face you. You had seen this look before.
"I don't––"
"––No 'cause you followed me in here. You are everywhere I look. I can't even get a wink of sleep most nights without dreaming of two things. You or beating Tony fucking Baddingham. And I can't think of you because you're young enough to be my daughter and I'm a fucking hypocrite for telling Rupert to stay away from Taggie when I look at you in that dress and wonder what you would look like with it on this floor right now. I'm not doing it. I can't do this."
Declan's outburst kept your feet frozen in place. Had he really just admitted to wanting you as badly as you wanted him.
You felt your hand roll the zipper of your dress down your side, your body moved without force as you slipped the straps over your shoulders and let it fall to the floor.
"Fuck..." Declan barely breathed out the word. His stare devouring every inch of your skin.
"I'm not doing this." Declan uttered again barely even audible as if only to himself before striding towards you. His fingers found your hips as he thrust you against the door.
His lips were on yours before your back found the solid wood behind you.
You reached up and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling yourself up towards him, trying to bring your body as close to his own as possible. You needed every gap between you gone. You wanted to feel the heat of him even on this sticky summer evening.
"What am I doing?" Declan broke away and dropped to his knees, placing a firm hand on the middle of your stomach to hold you flush against the door.
There was a deep hunger in his eyes as he lifted one of your thighs up onto his shoulder, never breaking his gaze from your face to almost check if what he was doing was allowed.
You threw your head up, trying to find the air he had stolen from you, one hand finding a grip within his dark curls as your welcome reply.
"Please." You whispered.
Declan moved your panties to the side, a finger running over your folds, sending fire against your skin before he closed his mouth around you.
You let your eyes roll back as his tongue darted across your clit. Electricity filled your body with every moment of contact.
You felt his fingers circle lightly around your entrance. Your hand jumped from his thick curls to tightly grip the back of his own that pushed against your stomach. His grip on you felt as if it were all that was holding you up.
"You want me this badly?" Declan asked with a mixture of teasing and shock. The wetness of your heat coated the tip of his fingers and glistened on the dark hairs of his moustache.
"I've imagined this so many times." You admit honestly.
"I best live up to your expectations then." Declan inserted a finger inside of you, causing a sharp gasp to escape your lips, which made Declan's cock twitch inside his boxer shorts. "Shhhh"
You placed your free hand over your mouth to which Declan smiled a toothy grin at you.
"Good girl" he purred.
Declan rose to his feet as he placed another finger inside of you, thrusting them in and out of you in a painfully slow motion that only made you ache for more.
Declan turned the lock on his door with his other hand before pulling himself away from you completely.
You pouted at the lack of contact to which he tutted.
"So impatient." He uttered as he undid his belt, pulling it from its loops and then kicking his trousers down.
Your eyes fell on the large member pressed against his underwear. The tip seeping precum through the material in a dark stain.
"Go to my desk." Declan ordered.
You almost ran over, Declan caught you by the waist and lifted you up onto it. Spreading your legs with his knee.
"Are you sure you want this?" Declan stripped himself of his shirt, revealing his chest covered with dark thick hair that you reached out to touch. This didn't feel real.
"More than anything." The words were so quiet but Declan seemed to hear them as he freed himself from his underwear.
You reached behind and unclasped your bra.
"Jesus..." He took a handful of your breast, squeezing you firmly as he stroked his member.
"Declan, please." You couldn't wait any longer. The ache pained you.
Declan didn't need to be told twice.
He tore your underwear down your legs and pressed his tip slowly into you.
You bit down on your lip hard to stop yourself from making any noise.
"Holy fuck..." Declan failed at being quiet. You were so tight against him he felt he could've finished inside of you within minutes.
You reached forward and hooked a grip behind his neck, encouraging him deeper inside of you.
"Fuck me please." you pleaded, trying to move your own hips to create some friction.
Declan took the hint and began thrusting into you quickly. His fingers almost bruising your skin as he held you steady on the desk.
The rattle of the belongings on the desk seemed to echo around the room alongside the slapping of skin.
Declan lifted you up, still inside of you and gently placed you down on the floor.
He hovered above you, just like he had once before, watching your face twist in pleasure as he fucked you.
You squeezed his shoulders, your nails leaving an impression whilst he brought you closer to your climax. You pressed your hips up into his creating hot friction against your clitoris, making you throb inside.
"Declan..." You tried to let him know; still trying to whisper to stay quiet.
"Cum for me, princess." Declan smirked, his stare never faltering as he rode you through to your end. He could feel you tighten around him only encouraging him to fuck you harder and deeper.
You bit down on your hand as your climax convulsed through you. Your body shaking in between Declan and the floor.
Declan moved you both effortlessly, lying on his back with you sat on top of him.
You leant ever so slightly forward, steadying yourself with your hand stretched out against his chest.
You smiled wickedly at him as you rolled your hips.
You felt exhausted by your own finish but knew you wanted to see the older man in the same state.
"That's a good girl." Declan held onto your hips, helping you pick up your pace.
His lips parted as he watched you ride him, sweat dripping down your skin mixing with his own as his dick twitched inside of you.
"Fuck (Y/n)." Declan cursed.
You shifted your hand to his neck, Declan almost laughed, flipping you again so that he was behind you. Both of you on your knees as he held you against his chest, his hand wrapped firmly around your neck with his opposite arm securely around your middle.
The sensation was almost unbearable as his thick member pumped in and out of you at such speed.
"You think you want to be a bad girl?" Declan hissed in your ear.
You could only shake your head.
"Bad girls get punished." Declan bit hard down on your shoulder and you fought to not cry out in a mixture of pleasure and pain.
"You're mine now." Declan's own proclamation brought himself to his own climax. He pulled out, spilling his seed over his own thighs to avoid finishing inside of you much to your own disappointment.
"I know you wanted that inside of you like the dirty girl you are." Declan teased you as he gave your throat one final soft squeeze.
You fell against him, both trying to catch your breath.
"Declan?" A voice and a knock came at the door.
"Shit..." The realisation of what had just happened and where it just happened hit Declan like a cricket bat to the face.
"I'll be out in a mo." Declan scrambled for his underwear and you did the same.
"Hurry up! I know that's where you're hiding the good stuff!" Bas' voice was more evident now and whilst he was definitely talking about the whiskey. The both of you couldn't help but laugh.
#Rivals#Rivals Imagines#declan o’hara#Declan o'hara one shot#Declan o'hara x reader#rupert campbell black#aidan turner#taggie o'hara#Declan x reader#Declan o'hara imagine#smut#imagine#one shot#x reader#rivals tv show
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I don't want to keep clogging my blog with vent posts but uh... I guess this is a more general concern/observation
But it's getting real hard to stay motivated in fandom spaces when there's little compensation, and annoying occurrences are more frequent than good ones.
Mainly there's been less engagement/people showing interest in creators and their art (such as sending asks, making comments and reblogging with tags) and MORE parasocial interactions. This goes for both artists and writers.
Over this year I've noticed a vast disinterest within my public in general. Asks about ocs, my art, or just nice simple comments of ''I love your art'' has been getting more and more scarce. My follower number is bigger than 2-3 years ago sure and I get more likes on my posts but they are feeling more like just numbers and statistics than actual people who supposedly like my stuff.
And while people being parasocial with creators has always been a thing, I feel like it's gotten way worse... in general? People sending personal pictures out of the blue in hopes of being validated, unwanted psychological advice or assumptions about the creator without any established connection first ( <- these happened to me in the same week.) ventdump, just insensitive/lacking of common sense comments in general, unreasonable demands (mostly with writers)... I wondered at first if it was just me, but a handful of mutuals/acquaintances who are artists and writers seems to be going through it as well.
It's annoying. It's tough. It's getting exhausting. Creators pour so much of themselves into their work—countless hours, effort, and passion, all to share something meaningful or entertaining with others (and for FREE) The LEAST anyone can do is show respect, even if opinions differ. When a writer posts a fanfic, don't just say ''omg post next chapter!'', when an artist posts a drawing of their favorite character, don't just say ''omg draw (character) next!'' as if they're faceless content machines that are expected to churn out more '''content''' for you without acknowledgment, encouragement, or appreciation.
''I want to support creators but I don't know what to say and I feel intimidated by their talent so I just lurk silently :((('' I swear to you, no creator (at least not the majority) is making up an intimidating persona to discourage you from interacting with them. They WANT your comments. A single ''I love your art/writing/videos'' or even something as silly as ''I want to eat your art'' is enough to keep a creator sighing dreamily for WEEKS. It doesn't have to be deep! It's heartfelt and that's what it matters!! (Just remember to keep it relevant and thoughtful... It takes just a bit of common sense NOT to comment things like ''this looks like (another character)'' or ''this but with (another unrelated ship/character/show)''. No one wants to hear comparisons or unrelated ideas when they’ve poured their soul into something.)
In fact, the ''I like your art but I think you're intimidating'' feels more hurtful than flattering. It makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong, acting wrong. 💀
If you love that fanfic that changed your brain psyche forever and want to gush about it, go tell the writer. If you loved so much a piece of art that you saved it a million times in your phone and can't stop thinking about it, go tell the artist. Push away the ''they probably won't care about my comment/it won't make a difference'' thoughts. DO IT NOW. You won't know when they might go inactive forever or deactivate. You can't know if that is the last piece they will ever post. Make sure you show appreciation to creators NOW, while they are still here. While they're still not being replaced by AI.
#fandoms#to those users who always reblog my art with tags and comments I SEE YOU. YOU MAKE A WHOLE DIFFERENCE. YOU GIVE ME STRENGTH TO GO ON#to people who send asks about my oc or show genuine interest and appreciation for my art/me even if I take a whole ass year to answer#I still APPRECIATE IT so much and one day (hopefully) ill answer it with a cute lil doodle 😭#one time I made a rlly heartfelt comment of appreciation for one my fav jp artists on twitter which I thought was ''intimidating''#i thought they were gonna think my comment was obnoxious or rude for not being in japanese but I made sure to be respectful#to my surprise the artist responded me with a small drawing as a thankyou... and they did that JUST for me 😭😭 not anyone else#it really opened my eyes#people can FEEL your love and passion for their work even with language barrier#its literally SO easy to be nice. and also SO easy to not be a parasocial dick.#but more often its none of those#if people cared about artists there wouldnt be AI art/writing
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Heart On Your Sleeve Part 7
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
written for steddiebigbang2024 and belatedly posting here!
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Steve's half asleep on the couch when Dustin arrives the next day, and Robin lets him in.
“Hearts out,” Dustin demands immediately.
Steve winces. “Not a good idea, bud. My ribs are-”
“It's not your ribs,” Dustin interrupts. “You think I didn't see some blood when you were waving your heart around? Don't treat me like a baby, Steve, come on.”
Robin looks at him, and Steve shrugs.
“Okay,” he says, and Robin takes his heart out from her chest.
It looks better than it did yesterday, but it's still pretty pulpy, and Dustin goes pale.
“Steve,” he whispers, voice cracking.
“It's getting better,” Steve promises.
Dustin frowns, looking between him and Robin. “Are you having trouble breathing again? Why is Robin holding it?”
“It heals better when someone else has it,” Steve says. “Some kind of science thing.”
Dustin's frown deepens, then smooths out, and he holds his hands out to Robin. “My turn.”
“Dustin, I'm not going to ask you to-” Steve starts.
“You can't ask, I'm telling you I'm going to,” Dustin retorts. “I'm the first person who carried it, remember?”
Steve looks at Robin. She shrugs, and he can feel that she's not opposed to it, so he shrugs back. She hands his heart over to Dustin. There's some fumbling as Steve gives Robin's heart back to her and takes Dustin's instead, and then -
Huh.
Dustin is just as stubborn as he's always seemed, but underneath that is a quiet fear and a sense of love deeper than anything Steve's ever felt - other than from Robin.
“Come here.”
Steve gives him a hug - or as much of a hug as he can manage - then leans back on the couch again. “Breakfast's in the kitchen,” he says, already closing his eyes.
—
The next time he opens them, it's to the sound of half a dozen gremlins talking in what's probably supposed to be hushed tones.
“How did you all even get in here?” he asks.
They jump, then Dustin juts his chin out.
“I called them,” he says.
“We are here to help,” El says solemnly.
“Dustin told us what happened,” Lucas says.
Steve grimaces. “Look, you guys don't have to-”
“Will it work?” El asks.
Steve blinks at her. “Will what work?”
“If I try to heal your heart. Dustin says he looked it up, and it works best if it's someone you care about. Am I?”
Oh, that's just cheating. How is he supposed to protest with those eyes looking at him.
“Yeah, Ellie, of course you are. It'll work.”
She holds out her hands determinedly. "I don't have my powers. I couldn't save my - my dad, but I can do this. I can help you."
And that's that.
The next thing he knows, they've scheduled up a rotation along with Robin, and taken over his house, setting themselves up to watch TV or play games or do whatever else.
He finds himself alone with El, and he looks at her for a moment before asking, “Do you like cookies?”
Of course she likes cookies.
Steve can't actually do much work, but he can sit at the kitchen table and give directions, and she determinedly follows all of them as she puts together cookie dough.
He can feel the rough edges of her grief and her hopelessness, and he tries to give back as much support as he can.
She isn't alone.
“May I ask you something?” she asks, when a batch of cookies are in the oven and they're eating cookie dough.
“Sure,” he says.
“Dustin is not your brother.”
That's not a question, but he answers it anyway. “Not the way Mike is Nancy's brother or Will is Jonathan's, no.”
She frowns. “I don't understand,” she admits. “Mike says you are brave. That he likes you better now that you're not Nancy's boyfriend. I thought - you are like Mike.”
Oh, he is definitely remembering that for later. “Like Mike how?”
“Mike stepped off of a cliff for Dustin.”
Steve's brain screeches to a halt. “Mike what?”
“There were mouth breathers - bullies. They threatened to hurt Dustin if Mike didn't jump. He did. I caught him,” she's quick to reassure him, like that's what he's stuck on. “So - I thought you are like Mike. You protect your friends.”
“Like you, too,” Steve says, deciding to table the whole Mike thing for now. “You protect your friends.”
She smiles at him, a tiny, fleeting thing before her face scrunches in confusion. “But Max and Dustin and Lucas were not always your friends. Max says you jumped in front of a demodog the day you met her. I don't understand.”
Yeah, Steve's not sure he really understands either - a feeling she must pick up, because she looks even more confused.
“I just - wanted to help.” It sounds even lamer than it did when he said that about cleaning up the graffiti at the theater, but it's what he's got. “Maybe - we don't have to be like anyone, you know? We can just be like us. We can just want to help.”
Her expression smooths out, and he can feel - she kind of likes that.
“What I like,” she says, which is clearly a call back to something else with the way she's feeling, though he has no idea what.
It's okay. He doesn't really have to know what, he thinks - they understand each other.
And they have cookies.
—
He calls Mrs. Byers, just to make sure she knows where Will and El are.
She does, of course, but he also wants to check on her.
Her voice is unsteady and thick with grief, but she tells him not to worry about her, asks how the kids are doing, how he is.
He doesn't want to worry her, either, but he tells her what the kids’ plan is, how hard they're trying to help him.
How guilty he feels about it.
She's gentle when she tells him to let them help, that they care about him and they want to be able to do something good. He promises he will, and that he'll look after them.
He wishes he could do more.
—
Mike's up next, like he wants to get it over with.
Steve wants to tease him about the whole thinking he's brave thing, but when he's hit with everything Mike feels - worry and love and pride and protectiveness and how can I keep them all safe what am I supposed to do, he finds he doesn't want to give him a hard time.
Mike's angry at him, but he's angry at him because he's scared. Because he doesn't want to like him, doesn't want to trust him, but he does.
Mike likes him a whole lot, actually.
And Steve guesses that Mike can feel his own slightly amused fondness, because the kid scowls at him. “What?”
“Nothing,” Steve replies.
He thinks for a while, while Mike sullenly sits at the kitchen table with him and pretends like Steve doesn't know that he actually has feelings.
Eventually, even though he knows it's going to get him scoffed at, he says, “Do you know why teams have co-captains?”
Mike rolls his eyes. “Because they're too stupid to figure out how to play themselves?”
He tamps down on his irritation, though he knows not quickly enough, because Mike looks smug.
“So there's more than one person to make the hard choices. So if one person can't be there, the other can. So no one has to be in two places at once. So one person doesn't have to be everything to everyone,” Steve continues.
Mike scoffs, but Steve can still feel that it resonates with him. “Your stupid sports game is way less important than real life danger.”
“Yeah, sure. But so is your dragons game, and you guys use that all the time.”
He can feel that Mike wants to protest, though he also reluctantly thinks that Steve's right.
“So, what, you think we should pick captains for our Party?” Mike asks.
“Nah. You're already the party leader, right?” Steve asks. He knows that's how Mike sees himself, knows that's the pressure he puts on himself.
Now more than ever.
“But last time and this time, we had to split up, right? And you can't be everywhere.”
“You don't get it,” Mike says. “It's my job to protect them. How am I supposed to do it if I can't look out for everyone?”
“You get some help. Look - that's what I'm here for, all right? Let me help watch out for you guys.”
Mike snorts. “You?”
Steve raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, I think it's worked out so far.”
Mike glances away. Whatever he's thinking of, there's the faint memory of fear and an unbidden, reluctant wash of relief, of safety.
“Fine,” he mutters. “Whatever, you're in the Party.”
Steve doesn't point out that he's already been in it, according to some of them. He has a feeling that's the most he's going to get out of Mike, for now.
It's enough.
—
It's easy, with Max and Lucas.
Probably easier than it should be.
He and Max swap, and he sits with her angry, confused grief. He can feel her daring him to say something, so - he doesn't.
He opens his arms, and he says, “Come here,” and she's exhausted enough that she does.
He hugs her tight while she cries into his chest, angry with herself for crying and angry with Billy for being so terrible and saving her life anyway. Angry with Steve, too, but that one's too complicated for him to figure out with the echoes of the feelings he gets from her.
“I'm here,” he says after a while, even though it makes her cry harder. “I'm right here.”
He sits with Lucas, after, staring at the door where El and Max have retreated to try to get some sleep.
“I don't know how to help her,” Lucas says.
He doesn't sound lost, but his heart beats in Steve's chest, and he can feel it anyway.
“Me either,” Steve admits, because he knows Lucas can feel it from him, too.
“What am I supposed to do?” Lucas asks.
Steve thinks for a moment. “Be there for her. Don't push her, but make sure she knows you're there. That you're not going anywhere.”
Some of the helplessness fades, and Lucas nods.
“Yeah, I can do that.”
They're quiet for a little bit.
“I want to try out for the basketball team,” Lucas says suddenly, then shoots an almost shy little look over at Steve at his pleased surprise.
“That's awesome, man. You want to get some more practice in after a few weeks?” Steve asks.
Lucas nods, then hesitates. “I don't think that Mike and Dustin and Will are going to like it.”
Steve frowns. “They like me okay.”
“Well, yeah, but that's different. We used to think you were a douchebag.”
It startles a laugh out of Steve. “Wow, thanks, Sinclair.”
Lucas shrugs, unapologetic. “We know you aren't now. But they're going to think I'm abandoning them.”
Steve considers. “Are you?”
“No! I'll still play D&D and stuff with them, we'll still be the Party. I want to prove you can do both. I want - I don't want people to mess with them. I want to do what you did.”
Steve swallows, suddenly a little choked up. He wishes he could blame it on his injuries, but he knows damn well Lucas can feel how touched he is.
“You're gonna be great, man,” he says when he has himself more under control. “You're gonna be way better than I ever was.”
—
When Will's up in the little rotation the gremlins have worked out, he lingers a few steps away, hesitant.
"Hey, man, you don't have to," Steve says awkwardly. "I can tell the other gremlins that you're needed at home."
Will looks at him for a moment. "Do I count?"
"What?" Steve asks.
"You didn't hunt a demodog with me, or barricade a bus in a junkyard, or fight off a bully, or go to the Upside Down tunnels, or invade a Russian bunker. You just let me into movies for free and let me hang out at your house with everyone. Is that enough?" Will's tone had been very matter of fact, but it goes a little bit more tenuous there.
"Yeah," Steve says. "Yeah, it is."
Will comes up to the table, holding his hands out expectantly, and Steve drops his heart into them.
It doesn't hurt, but by now, he doesn't expect it to. Steve's not sure he'll ever be able to thank any of the kids for this, but if Joyce is right, if being able to do something helps them after everything they just went through, then he guesses he's glad for that.
The awkwardness lingers a little after they've exchanged hearts. Probably because now they can feel an echo of each other's feelings. It makes Steve scramble for a topic.
"Mike and Lucas apologize to you yet?" Steve asks.
Will looks at him in confusion. "What for?"
"You think I didn't notice they've been kind of shitty? My money's on Mike being more insensitive about it, but Lucas has been right there with him, you know? Ditching Dustin half the time since he's been back, and before that it was always you playing fifth wheel."
Will looks a little surprised. “How'd you even notice that?”
"Because the same thing happened to me," Steve admits.
"I doubt it," Will mutters.
"It did!" Steve insists. "I had two best friends growing up. Then in middle school, they started dating, and suddenly every time we hung out I was the third wheel. It drove me nuts at first."
Will frowns. "Wait, but. You were always dating girls."
"Well, yeah, because I knew I was supposed to. I did a lot of things because it was what I was supposed to do." Steve'd liked all of them well enough, enjoyed dating them - especially once he started having sex and realized how good at it he could be - but he's not going to pretend like there isn't a reason his relationships didn't last very long.
Nancy'd been the only one he could see a forever with.
The kid's brows furrow, like he's not really sure what to do with that information.
"My point is-” Steve points at him with his spoon. “-don't let them rush you, or make you feel like you have to do something you don't want to do just to fit in with them. They're a lot better friends than mine were; they'll understand."
Will considers that. "Jonathan says I should never like something just because people tell me I should. That it's okay that I'm a freak, because he's a freak, too.”
“Yeah?” Steve asks. “What'd you say back?”
Will scrunches his nose. “I asked if that was why he didn't have any friends.”
He shouldn't, but Steve gives a little snort of laughter. Oh, no, Will is funny.
“Your brother has friends,” Steve protests, to counter his laughter. “He's got Nancy and me.”
Will rolls his eyes. “Nancy's his girlfriend.”
“Point in your favor,” Steve admits. “Still leaves me. And Robin will be his friend.”
Will toys with an apple from the fruit basket on the island. “Are you and Jonathan even really friends? It's not like you guys hang out.”
“Ouch, Byers, I thought you were the nice one,” Steve says, giving the kid a fond little smile to show he doesn't mean it. “There's different kinds of friends, I guess. Did, uh. Did Jonathan ever tell you how I got involved with all this?”
“Not really.” Will says with a shrug. “Just that you and him and Nancy fought a demogorgon.”
“That's because your brother's a good guy,” Steve tells him, then nudges the chair across from him.
It only moves a handful of inches, making Steve grimace - he'd wanted to kick it all the way out from under the table, but clearly he's not at full kicking strength. Still, it does the job, and Will takes a seat.
“I saw Nancy and Jonathan together on her bed one night, when she and I had just started dating. She couldn't tell me about the Upside Down stuff yet, but I knew she was lying, and I thought they were seeing each other behind my back.”
Will's looking at him, eyes huge, and it makes guilt twist in his stomach at the thought of what he said to Jonathan that day.
“We got in a fight the next day,” Steve admits. “I was really mean to him. So I went to your house later to apologize, and that's when I stumbled in on him and Nancy setting their trap. I gotta tell you, it was a really rude awakening, getting my apology speech interrupted by a demogorgon.”
“Try getting your bike ride home interrupted by one,” Will says dryly.
For a moment, Steve wonders if he should feel guilty bringing it up and potentially traumatizing the kid, but - Will doesn't look like he wants to be tiptoed around, and he can feel the faint trepidation from the kid's heart beating in his chest. The fear that someone's going to treat you different.
So Steve snorts instead. “Okay, you've got me beat,” he concedes. “You win the gold medal of demogorgon attacks.”
“Thanks.” It's just as dry, but Will's smiling at Steve like he said the right thing, so he'll take it. “Do I get an actual medal?”
Steve gives a surprised little laugh. “You know what? Sure. Come on.”
His pace is slow as he heads upstairs, and out of the corner of his eye, he's pretty sure he sees Will's hands twitch like he's debating trying to help him up. Steve resolutely ignores it until they get to his room, and then he unearths his first place medal from the medley swimming relay in eighth grade.
“Hang on, let me-” Steve digs around for some duct tape and a sharpie, then slaps a strip of tape on the back of the medal, pressing it down to get it to stick well. He writes demogorgan attack on the tape, blows on it to get it to dry, then hands it to Will with all the solemnity as if he was actually presenting him with a first place medal.
“Oh my God,” Will says, looking a little gobsmacked. “You're a nerd. You're one of us!”
“Hey! You spread that around, and I'll take your medal back!” Steve threatens.
“No way,” Will retorts. “Come back when you get dragged into the Upside Down by a demogorgon for dinner.”
“No thanks,” Steve says. “It's all yours.”
Will is beaming at him, and Steve kind of hates to ruin the mood - but he also really has to sit down. The downside to having them all on a rotation of heart exchanges is that he can't hide when it gets really bad.
He sits down on his bed while he can still do it without just dropping down onto the mattress. Will watches him for a moment, then carefully sits on the bed too, a foot or so away from him.
“So - that's why you and Jonathan are friends? You apologized and you fought a monster together?” Will asks.
“Yeah, I guess so. Look, there's different kinds of friends, right? There's the friends you have because you share a class together, or the ones you play the same sport - or, uh, hobby with, or the ones you just hang out with sometimes. And then there's the good ones, the ones who know you. Jonathan and I might not hang out outside of school, but I know he's got my back, and I've got his. Any time he needed me, I'd be right there.”
His feelings about Jonathan are - complicated, but that's the truth. Whatever else, Steve cares about the guy a hell of a lot, trusts him like he trusts very few others.
Steve's not sure what Will can pick up from him, but it must be enough to convince him that Steve's sincere, because he just quietly says, “Oh.”
“That goes for you, too,” Steve tells him. “Okay? You need me, I'm there.”
Will's cheeks go just a little pink, and there's a faint flutter of some kind in his heart, but Steve can't really tell what it is. “Okay.”
They're quiet for a moment, but it's not really awkward anymore - or at least, not beyond Steve trying to figure out how long before he's going to be able to get himself back downstairs without leaning on anyone.
“Did you date Nancy because you were supposed to?” Will asks after a while.
“Nancy's different,” Steve replies automatically, hearing an echo of himself saying the same thing to Dustin the day they were looking for Dart, and knowing it's just as true now as it was then, even if he's over her now - or as over her as he thinks he'll ever be.
Will mulls that over. “So - I might find a girl one day that's different, even if I've never liked girls before?”
There's something about the way that Will says it that sends him back into the Starcourt bathroom with Robin, watching her stare at him as he said but Tammy Thompson's a girl, waiting for it to click into place for him, and -
Oh.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit, he thinks he's accidentally implied something he didn't really mean to imply here. He thinks about trying to stutter out a clarification, that when Steve said he did it because he was supposed to, he didn't mean that he didn't like girls - he loves girls, girls are fantastic -
But.
But there's Eddie.
Will's voice had been so small, and whatever he can feel from Steve's heart in his chest is making his eyes go wide and scared, and it -
“Maybe,” Steve finds himself saying before he really knows what he's talking about. “But maybe not. And that's - that's okay. Whoever you like, or don't like, whoever you want to date or not date, it's okay.”
Steve pauses, feels like that isn't enough, and scrunches his face up. “Unless they're like, objectively terrible. If you get a crush on some little asshole, I can and will make fun of you.”
There's a ghost of a smile there. “Like Dustin and Suzie?” he asks.
“Way worse than Dustin and Suzie,” Steve says. “I had to be nice about Suzie, because everyone thought Dustin was making her up. I'm talking no holds barred here.”
—
"Do you think that guy's dead?"
Steve doesn't have to ask what guy Dustin means. He grimaces a little, because even if he wanted to, there's no way he can lie with their hearts in each other's chests. "We blew up their lab, man, I think most of them are dead."
Dustin frowns, looking like he's not sure if he thinks that's a good enough answer.
"I guess," he says finally. Then, so quietly Steve can barely hear it, Dustin asks, "Am I a bad person?"
"What?" Steve asks, thrown. "You've saved the world how many times now?"
Dustin gives him a look. "The same amount of times that you have."
Steve bumps Dustin's shoulder with the back of his knuckles. "Saved Nancy and Jonathan, maybe, but not sure how much world saving I did the first time. You got one up on me."
Dustin rolls his eyes. "Basically the same."
"All right, all right," Steve says. "We've saved the world a few times. Bad people don't usually do that."
Dustin fiddles with the hem of his shirt. "Billy did. Kind of. He helped, at the end. Does that make him a good person?"
Shit, Steve is way too concussed for this.
"No," he says after a little while. "I don't think so. Maybe if he had more time, but I don't think one good thing that he did while he was already dying makes up for all the other bad things he did."
Dustin screws up his face in concentration, then nods. "Me too."
Steve'd really like to just end the conversation there, but he's pretty sure Dustin needs him to keep going, and, well.
He's always going to be there when Dustin needs him.
"What makes you think you're a bad person?" he asks.
Dustin stares at his hands for a little while. "I don't feel bad."
Steve tries to make sense of that for a moment, then gives up. "You lost me."
"I killed that guy," Dustin says, looking back up at him almost defiantly. "And I don't feel bad. I'm not sorry he's dead."
Guilt stabs through him so strongly that he knows Dustin must feel some of it, and he grimaces a little when Dustin frowns at him.
"What was that?" Dustin asks.
"I'm sorry that you had to do that," Steve says. "It's not fair."
Dustin scoffs. "None of this is fair."
All right, yeah, Dustin's got a point. Okay, new tactic.
"Look at me, Dust," Steve says softly.
Dustin pulls a face. "I am looking at you."
"Ugh, no, I mean look at me." Steve waves a hand at himself.
"You look like shit," Dustin tells him.
"Exactly," Steve agrees. "You know why I look like shit?"
There's an echo of something remarkably similar to the guilt Steve just felt.
"Because of me," Dustin says, voice small.
Shit.
"What? No! How is this your fault?" Steve asks.
"I pushed the Russian message thing. You only looked into it because I wanted to," Dustin says.
"That's not - I looked into it for the same reason I helped you look for Dart, okay? Because I'm in this, and we're in this together, and if there's something out there, it's going to find us. That's not your fault."
Dustin doesn't look convinced.
"There is nothing that's going to keep me away from being in this with you, okay? Even if you didn't push me. Even if you didn't even tell me. I'd find out, and then I'd be mad." He pauses. "Like, really mad. Like telling your mom you ditched me and got in trouble so she doesn't let you leave the house for a year mad."
"Okay, okay," Dustin says, but he looks happier. "So what was your point, then?"
His point?
Right, his point.
"I look like shit because of the dead guy and his buddies." Part of Steve thinks he should hedge around this, try to sugarcoat it a little, but - treating Dustin like he's a kid who can't handle this isn't going to do anything. "You saw my heart, Dustin. You think the guys who did that were just going to let me walk out of there?"
Dustin looks at him, eyes big. "No," he admits quietly.
"The only reason I'm still standing here is because of you. I mean it, man - I'd be dead without you. And it sucks that you had to do that, and I wish I could have been faster or better, saved you from being the one that had to, but I'm not sorry that he's dead, either. Maybe that makes me a bad person. Maybe I'm a bad person because I would do the same thing, because I'd have killed all of them to protect you and I wouldn't feel bad at all."
Dustin's lip quivers a little. "You're not a bad person, Steve."
"Neither are you," Steve tells him.
The kid's eyes look suspiciously wet. Steve shifts, straightening up a little and lifting his arms.
"Come here."
Dustin drops down onto the couch, squished into his side. Steve drapes his arm over his shoulder, gingerly hugging him, and pretending that he can't hear Dustin's quiet sniffles or feel the shake of his shoulders.
"You're like the best person I know," Steve says softly.
"You too," Dustin replies, voice a little wet. "You're gonna be okay, right?"
"Yeah. I'm gonna be fine."
His heart might not ever be the same, but with all of them trying so hard to keep it together and help it heal - it makes him feel pathetic, but he kind of thinks he might be even better.
It seems a good enough response for Dustin, who stays tucked in against his side, eyes slipping shut like he's going to fall asleep right there.
Steve wants to bitch about it, but he also doesn't want to move, so he just lets it happen.
"I used to be so jealous of Mike and Will," Dustin mutters sleepily after a while.
"Yeah?" Steve asks absently.
"All this sucks, and they had Nancy and Jonathan," Dustin says.
"Mmm," Steve agrees, feeling pretty close to sleep himself.
"I'm not anymore though."
"No?" Steve asks.
"Nah," Dustin mumbles. "You're way better than Nancy and Jonathan."
----
This is already written, and my plan is to post one part a day until it's all up here!
Taglist (always happy to add more to this if anyone wants): @fairytalesreality @lostonceandneverfound @wheneverfeasible @awkwardgravity1 @theintrovertedintrovert @thewickedkat @ravenfrog @scarlet-malfoy @missmagillicuddy @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @ollyxar @cringe-culture-is-dead-99 @thedragonsaunt @makewavesandwar @cryptid-system @ajeff855 @mae-liz @the-fantastical-asexual @jettestar @warlordess @persnicketysquares @samsoble @my-love-of-books @mydysfunctionallife @dreamercec @holyangelstudentuniverse @breealtair @shunna @xtraordinarally @thatdamnfan @justalittledrainbamage @strangerfolks @disrespectedgoatman @amber-ambience @anxietyfulloption @thepossummoldypasta
#steddie#steve harrington#stranger things#steddie fic#robin buckley#dustin henderson#max mayfield#lucas sinclair#will byers#mike wheeler#eleven hopper#steve and dustin#steve and max#steve and lucas#steve and el#steve and mike#steve and will#steve and the party#good babysitter steve
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jayvik headcanons because my heart is happy but also hurts.
these take place either in that special part of s1 act 1 where nothing went wrong with them yet OR in a special universe where nothing will ever go wrong ever <3
Viktor either talks endlessly or has periods of silence Jayce listens to every word and responds but also knows when it's just silent 'be together time".
Jayce talks a lot as well, but he'll start a subject, pause for a few hours, then continue on later as if he didn't take a break. Viktor fully understands this.
They are literally each other's worst hype man. the words "no, don't do that" have rarely been uttered in their lab. if they are it's about not eating/sleeping or something unrelated to science. these men are "yes, and" till the very end.
Heimerdinger laughs anytime someone is like "At least Talis has someone to calm him down now!" Because like. His assistant (who he should apologize to for not encouraging him more) is literally insane.
Jayce can charm the pants off of anyone in order to gain something, but only at a gala or function. Only works on the rich. He's gotten him and Viktor bigger labs, lots of funding, new things.
Viktor, however, either intentionally or unintentionally, gets free shit all the time from local owners/regular workers because his natural snark and calm demeanor (plus the looks and accent) have people eating out of the palm of his hand.
He's unaware his usual drink/breakfast order costs less then it should and is more portioned. A local bookstore owner gives him the best copies.
Viktor mentions Singed one time and Jayce was like. no wonder you failed lab safety three times. is like okay you're never seeing that man ever again.
Jayce is very artistically inclined. Musically or visually. He can sing (doesn't like to in front of many people) and sings often to only his mom, Viktor, and maybe Caitlyn. Has the best music taste. A bookshelf full of records.
Viktor is fantastic with kids to the point he has a mom fan club. (Some dads too). This is because he took over for a science lab for a week to help out an old colleague and by the end the back row was filled with parents just watching and listening because their kids were actually interested in school for the first time ever
Jayce....is awkward with kids. He likes them, but my man does not know how to deal. He likes babies because they're small and cute, will hold a baby all day. but toddlers and kids? what do you discuss with them? taxes?
both avoid older kids and teens like the plague though. it's understandable. have you meet a thirteen year old? scary.
Viktor didn't even notice until Caitlyn pointed it out (very coyly) that pretty much all the clothes and accessories he has are in Talis house colors. Jayce did it intentionally 100%.
Viktor wanders whenever theyre out traveling. Jayce blinks and suddenly Viktor is halfway up the road or a new item has caught his eye.
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What the companions would make you if they had access to a kitchen:
Cait
I'm thinking a nice stir-fry or rice with a shit ton of vegetables and PROTEIN
Of course she loves her protein
Hmm or maybe a lasagna. Nice and dense.
Whatever she makes, there'll be enough of it to go around
She gives off food insecurity to me so I feel like she prefers to take her food and eat alone most days
But you WILL have a shitton of leftovers!
Codsworth
A nice breakfast spread like what you'd see in movies.
French toast, eggs (sunny side up or your preference if he knows it), bacon, several options of cereal in those little fancy cereal dispensers, pancakes or waffles depending on your preference, fresh fruit laid out...
And of course a glass of orange juice
He wants nothing more than for you (and anyone else you're sharing the meal with) to sit down and enjoy while he cleans the dishes and helps out
Just like old times <3
Curie
Baking time!!!!
Cookies are her go-to
Does that thing where you use your thumbprint to make a heart shape and fills it with jam
They come out perfect every time. She leaves them out on a plate and they're gone within a minute
Just be warned she might eat the cookie dough. Would definitely make edible cookie dough just to eat it raw at like 1am
Danse
He's a protein shake and plain hard boiled eggs type of guy
He wouldn't make you a meal, but would mealprep your entire week for you
(It's just plastic tupperware of boiled eggs and like, one whole carrot)
If he HAD to make an actual warm meal it'd probably look exactly like Brotherhood rations
Mashed potatos, plain crackers, and some vague meat in sauce
Deacon
This man lives like he will be killed via sniper if he ever expresses a genuine feeling
So as much as I'd like to say he'd make a meal that's really important to him, he'd probably just grab the nearest cookbook and pick a random recipe
Not even he knows what it's gonna be like until it's made
He also doesn't want to be associated with a certain meal so he'll only make it once or twice. If you want it again then YOU have to cook it!
If he's completely alone and just making something for himself, then maybe a nice sandwich or sub
I don't know why but he just gives off sandwich vibes
Dogmeat
Can't cook
He would, however, oversee the situation and taste test when needed
Gage
Grill dad
He'd make like, ribs and baked potatoes. Nice and filling and also pretty damn messy
Not too big on vegetable but he'd also grill like, corn on the cob or maybe some skewers
Chicken wings perhaps???
Maccready
Weird food combinations is this man's bread and butter (or bread and ketchup)
He WILL hand you a turkey sandwich with ketchup and potato chips in it. And it will taste good.
Or like, steak sushi. Spaghetti on pizza. Mayo dumplings?
He can make basically anything, but he just has some really weird preferences
If you can get over the strangeness it's actually pretty decent
Nick
Toast and black coffee <3
That's it
I mean like he'll make you tea or something if you don't like coffee
Pre-war Nick always had toast and coffee for breakfast in the morning so it's nostalgic to him
Old Longfellow
"Oh he'd make a fish based meal" NO. He lives next to the water he's probably SO DAMN TIRED OF FISH
Chicken noodle soup maybe, but like high quality chicken noodle soup with some nice spices
Or maybe a pot roast??
Piper
Weirdly enough, as much as she loves sweets I feel like she'd be a much better cook than a baker
She'd make a nice well rounded meal with protein, carbs, 1-2 vegetables. Gotta make sure Nat's eating well
Not huge on spices though. Like your mashed potatoes will be buttery and smooth as fuck but you're limited to like basic box gravy and maybe salt and pepper.
I feel like she can and will make an entire turky dinner. Just out of nowhere. There's like 7 different sides and an apple pie Curie made.
Preston
Oh this man will make a MEAN stew
It's his go-to. He can share it if needed, have leftovers to feed himself for multie days, and it's versatile
I'm thinking either radstag or brahmin meat, or maybe a bone stock, but in the past he's made stews out of basically anything, from bugs to deathclaw meat
He also has a soft spot for campfires and would love to roast marshmallows or cook hotdogs or something around a fire
X6-88
Grabs an apple for himself and leaves.
The Institute eats SUPPLEMENT PACKETS there is NO WAY this man knows how to cook
He's probably a picky eater too, and he only likes those packets
He's gonna be living off a diet of applesauce and ensure for a long while
Honestly he might enjoy taking his food (any food) and putting it in a blender. It fixes the sensory aspect of it.
#fallout 4#fallout 4 companions#TUMBLR POSTED THIS BEFORE I WANTED TO >:(#so i GUESS this is finished#headcanons#cait#codsworth#curie#paladin danse#deacon#dogmeat#porter gage#maccready#nick valentine#old longfellow#piper wright#preston garvey#x6 88
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can I request a Paimon fic where they and MC go on a picnic date?
Paimon x gn!Reader - Chocolate covered strawberries♡
⟡ Masterlist ⟡
A/N: I haven't written anything for Paimon in so long and only now realised how much I missed it! No relationship is specified, but it is one where you two are okay with a lot of physical contact ^^
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
'Y/N~! Come quicklyyy! I'm at: ' a rather alarming message from Paimon read. The lack of emojis or any other indicator of tone or context made you worried about their safety after they sent you a location which indicates they're on the outskirts of Gehenna where angel attacks are more common.
Your fear is quickly replaced with confusion once yous tart nearing the place Paimon sent you. There are no signs of angels nor attacks. Instead, upon getting closer, you notice Paimon under one of the gorgeous, ancient Hell oaks on something that looks like pink tartan blanket.
It takes a second to shake away the adrenaline from thinking you're rushing to help a dying demon and only after the initial shock you finally realise what's actually happening.
"Pai, what is this? You almost scared me to death! I thought you were getting attacked!" you scold the adorable demon, still catching your breath from running most of the way and then having to climb the rather steep hill.
"Oh~?... I'm sorryyy, Y/N! I didn't mean tooo... It's just that I noticed that the chocolate on the straberries I made was starting to meltttt." Paimon sadly pouts, looking down at the red fruit in their hands.
Looking around you notice all the various foods and snacks alongside two full wine glasses and a bottle of your favorite drink. A... picnic?
Paimon notices your puzzled expression and giggles while getting up from the ground, handing you one fo the glasses that are now in their hands, "Well~, you did say nobody's ever invited you to a real dateeee, so I wanted to be the first oneee!"
"Aw, that's so sweet of you! Thanks!" you light up and accept the drink handed to you. Your legs slightly shake from the workout as you're sitting down while trying not to spill your drink.
"I hopeee you like what I've gotten for youuu! I asked His Majesty Satan to help me pickkk~!" Paimon takes their seat beside you and you only now realise why all of a sudden Satan liberated you of all duties for the rest of the day. He knew all along.
"Don't worry Pai, I'll like whatever you've picked for me! Sometimes you even know me better than I know myself!" you smile widely with genuine happiness.
"Aw~! Y/N~! You're so cuteee!" the demons queals and squishes their cheek against yours. A sweet smell of cotton candy and fruity bubblegum only now reaches your nose and it reminds you why you like Paimon so much. Their cheery attitude is a breath of fresh air amongst all the demons with dark auras.
The two of you sit, eat and chat for so long, the sun's gone down and the first shy stars start appearing on the darkening horizon. When you first came to Hell, you didn't expect to see stars with Heaven right above you, but as it turns out, there are visible stars, and even more beautiful than those on earth.
"Y/N~ I'm glad you're hereee. And I don't mean here as in hereee, but here in general~! You make us all so happyyy~" Paimon sighs, leaning back against a pillow next to you as you're both staring up at the millions of glowing dots.
"Aw, Pai! I'm super glad to be here too!" you giggle and lean back next to Paimon who pulls you in for cuddles.
As the night progresses, the two of you eventually fall asleep together only to be woken up in the morning by Zagan who was tasked to go look for you to make sure you're both okay.
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okay more things from the kids' audio commentary because i'm back at it again
during one of their early days of filming during the opening scenes, william moseley convinced skandar to try to eat the fake glass
i'm still not over them blindfolding georgie so her first take on the narnia set was really her first ever time seeing it
someone had to be inside the wardrobe physically blowing out lucy's candle and apparently it took a ton of takes fhdsjhfk
we have discussed many a time how skandar had to eat like 35 pieces of turkish delight during takes with the witch but apparently one time they brought out fake turkish delight and skandar didn't know and TRIED TO EAT PLEXIGLASS
they only made two of the goblet props from the scene with the witch so every take of ginnabrik throwing it involved the props guy standing off-camera and catching it aka getting hot chocolate ALL OVER HIM because he didn't want to break the prop. #dedication
georgie henley described edmund as being like a dog forgiving its master when the witch snaps at him during the end of that first scene together. i'm SICK.
apparently during one take in the professor's study (i think?) anna improvised saying something like "oh shut up you know i'm smarter than you" to william. maybe it was the other way around? but it was the two of them
skandar loved the woman's coat he had to wear unlike his character who hated it lmao
and yeah so my fav shot of peter falling down in the snow and grinning was apparently william falling on some exposed nail or bit of wood and grimacing because it hurt like a bitch but i thank him for his sacrifice in creating my favorite tiny moment in the entire movie
georgie during the beaversdam scene: yeah i tried to eat a pencil during a rehearsal of this. because it tasted good
georgie repeatedly emphasizing she feels bad for james (tumnus) in the witch's dungeon scene "BUT NOT SKANDAR."
when they were running from the witch georgie tripped and went flying and william didn't even notice at first because she was so small
they covered the legs of father christmas' reindeer with snow to make them LOOK white like the witch's so everyone would think it was the witch chasing them, but if you look you can see they're brown. DETAILS!
during the river scene (i'm crying laughing over this) andrew adamson was doing the lines for the wolf opposite william so he was literally on his hands and knees going like "what's it going to be son of adam" while william moseley had to play it totally straight. bonkers
they had a swear bucket that georgie heavily enforced which i knew but what i DIDN'T know is they made william pay like $50 or something because his phone went off on set, and half of it was because they didn't like his ringtone. brilliant
there were all these details on set like aslan's face being carved into the furniture in his camp!!!
they used a polystyrene model of aslan for reference in a lot of the takes and skandar was apparently writing messages on it all the time
andrew adamson during the battle scene: yeah it was at this point during the screening you could see william turning to his girlfriend being like "i'm an action hero!" william: "...you weren't meant to REVEAL THAT :/"
william actually got stabbed in the arm during his fight with the witch when she pins peter to the ground (this was not supposed to happen)
horn caps!!! i was already told this but i'm still like weeee lucy gave tumnus his horn caps :) they did that :)
skandar getting hit with cricket balls not once but TWICE on accident this movie.
god. i love this movie an unREASONABLE amount can you tell.
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First off, Quinn needs so many hugs. Do his nightmares of his visions get any better with Vincent laying beside him? Does talking about them help? I imagine witnessing them happen irl doesn't help at all. Poor boy.
Second off, I remember you mentioning a dragon attack in London being Quinn's first vision. Does that mean there were ghouls in London?? And now they're all over France??
You said the bad vampires are using dragons to turn the French into ghouls, raising a giant army of mindless slaves? Who are they going to use their army against? Can a vampire be turned into a ghoul? How will our protagonists survive all this?!
Please know I am sitting here eating up this lore, hoping patiently for the day this all turns into books that I can hug and shove (lovingly) in everyone's faces to read. Thank you for answering all my silly questions. <3
Poor Quinn indeed 😔 He's got so much baggage I don't think he'll ever be able to bear all of it, especially not by himself. Being with Vince does help, but he still has bad nights, and more often than not his gut response is to bury all the shit he's feeling, and that can lead to him lashing out if Vincent pushes him too hard to open up -_- He definitely does *not* like talking about his visions or dreams, so Vince has to come up with creative ways to help him....it's difficult, as you can imagine...
2nd question--yes, Quinn witnessed the dragon attack in London which had massive casualties; and many of those who weren't killed were turned into ghouls 💀 Ghouls in general have been multiplying across the globe, but the concentrated mass from London have spread across Britain and have been posing a severe threat. Prior to joining the task force, Vincent had actually been serving in an underground midnight vanguard, colloquially known as the 'fanguard'---a protective patrol of vampires who have taken it upon themselves to keep the public safe from such supernatural dangers, albeit in secret. So he's had a fair amount of encounters with ghouls throughout the nation, and more militant ones now that the evil vampires are spreading their influence...
As for France--yeah, that's their latest target. The 'vampire terrorists' are currently escalating their attacks across Europe, seemingly with an agenda that posits humankind become subservient to the greater vampire cause yada yada.... the army is more a hypothetical threat, the true nature of their intentions is currently unknown 🤷♀️ we shall seeeee.......
Other answers to your questions: no, vamps can't turn into ghouls; vampires are already considered 'dead' and ghouls are more like 'corpses in progress'; so a ghoul will eventually die at the end of its lifespan but a vampire won't. As such, vampires are immune to the effects of draconic radiation. How will our protagonists survive all this?!--hmm. the jury's still out 🤐
I'm honestly thrilled that you all are this invested already--it means I can keep motivating myself to actually write this damn thing (I will, I swear--after the holidays, perhaps...) But yeah. Thank you for your enthusiasm, please feel free to spitball ideas/questions/rants at me any time <3
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Can I ask from this ask game for BakuDeku (all of the questions)? Thanks 🧁
https://www.tumblr.com/comingfromastatechampionasshole/119898100247?source=share
Hi! Sure!
1. Which one is the better cook
Definitely Katsuki but I am actually fairly certain that Deku can cook too, considering he has such a close relationship with his mother.
2. What their love letters look like
"You forgot your lunch again, stupid Nerd. >:( >:( Do I have to take care of you now too????
*bunch of scribbled out swear words*
Have a good day at work...I guess. Tch."
"Have a great day at work Kacchan!!!! 😊😊😇😊😇❤️🌟❤️❤️✨⭐ Don't forget to eat your lunch! 😊 See you at home!!"
3. Which one outlives the other, and how they cope
Neither. They die together. That is the only possible outcome. I will not accept anything else. (It's actually Bakugo that outlives Deku and becomes one of those lonely grumpy grandpas who grumble at everyone ever since their love died and swear at youngsters about how loud they are and spends their day alone in the same home he lived with his husband that now feels much more quiet and empty without Izuku there to ramble about his day and give him random kisses throughout the day. So now Bakugo just spends time alone with a scowl on his face like how he used to before he fell in love with Izuku, but deep down he misses him and the time they spent together)
4.What they do on date night
Bakugo begrudgingly takes Izuku to an amusement park, Izuku beaming like the sun, happy to share a crepe with him. Then Bakugo grumbles about how stupid amusement parks are so Deku tells him it's okay to not want to go on the rides because not everyone can handle the nausea. Bakugo takes it personally and makes it a challenge so they proceed to go on every single ride there is until one of them pukes or can't take it anymore but they're both too stubborn to give up and just say "I can still keep going" and next thing they know it's already closing time and they ended up spending the entire day in the amusement park. Then they go home and pass out in eachothers' arms.
5. How many kids they'll have
Two kids that they'll adopt like Mahoro and Katsuma
6. How they decorated their bedroom
Couldn't agree on the theme and color so they agreed to paint it something plain and simple like how Bakugo wanted but Izuku can decorate his side of the room with All Might posters and pictures of eachother and their friends.
7 Which one is the worse driver
I feel like Bakugo would be the more aggressive driver but Deku would kinda space out in the middle of driving and start muttering about something then 5 streets later he realizes he's driving and looks around surprised like how did I get here
8. What they argue about
Domestic things cause they can't agree on anything especially when it comes to cooking, Bakugo always wants to do everything his way while Izuku keeps trying to convince him but ultimately gives up
9. Which one swears more
I think that's an obvious one XD
10. What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other
They definitely watch All Might documentaries together(even though Bakugo complains that it's stupid). Izuku secretly watching shows about their pro hero friends but hides it because he knows Bakugo would get jealous. Bakugo actually secretly watches those too but would never admit it
11. What their first impression was of each other
Bakugo: what the frick is this nerd of a kid doing here (looks weirdly at Deku boucing around like a bunny on energy drinks)
Deku: oh..he's wearing the same hat as me...I'll become friends with him! (Finds the kid's scowl a little off-putting that screams 'Don't talk to me', but decides to approach him anyway just to make friends with him)
12. What they do for their anniversary
Nothing, just a regular day for them, but somehow they always end up making the day a little sweeter than all the other days
13. Which makes a bigger deal of birthdays
Deku. He will never not do a surprise party for Bakugo even though Bakugo always says he hates it
14. What nicknames they call each other
Kacchan! Nerd.
They would never ever do pet names, I am 100% sure of that
15. What they would change about each other
Their past and the trauma they went through. Bakugo would change Izuku's past so he wouldn't be so reckless and he'd put himself first, and Izuku would change Bakugo's upbringing that made it so hard for him to express himself and his feelings
Let me know what you guys think 💚
#bnha#mha#bkdk#bakudeku#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#bakugou katsuki#midoriya izuku#bakugo#deku#ask lilybecca1#ask me anything#send asks#ask tumblr#questions and answers
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i got lazy in the second panel and didnt feel like coloring or whatever bite me
#i think she'd be petty enough to do this if rebecca actually lived#flirting with her man. unacceptable. eats#the trend of uzi in the suit and n in the dress is the funniest shit ever to me. n would be so willing to wear a dress#and she'd totally wear her combat boots over the pants. they're not going anywhere#she should be allowed to say fuck#art#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#serial designation n#i can finally tag it myself exclamation mark#biscuit bites#uzi x n#murder drones nuzi#lizzy was recording it to send it to v i swear shes not just playing subway surfers#i dont understand outfit design in the slightest im just making it up as i go#ill figurre out a speechbubble design for uzi later im tired#oh yeah uhhh#murder drones rebecca#murder drones lizzy#hope i didnt forget anything ok bye
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me: i finished the latest trailblaze mission in hsr so i can look at what other people are posting now! oh boy i hope it's discussions and theories about the story. i can't wait to see what everyone thought about firefly (what was going on with you sweetie...) and A Child's Dream - that segment in particular really left a profound impact on me. like who is mikhail? the voice we hear throughout is obviously misha's - did he have a twin? does mikhail have something to do with clockie? and from what we heard and saw, misha or... mikhail. encountered the embodiment of Death that lurks beneath the dreamscape. what's... the full story there...? i can't wait to see other people's perspectives it'll help me piece a more coherent theory together-
other hsr fans: *thirstposting about aventurine and/or dr. ratio, trying to cancel sparkle even though the entire point of her character is that yes she's a horrible person because it's high time we see how DANGEROUS and CRUEL the masked fools can be - no more reducing them to the silly wacky hijinks sampo pulled on jarilo; you should be scared of these guys; the game's story never wanted you to make sparkle your next skrunkly blorbo babygirl lol, heated discussions about whether dr. ratio displayed the same racism towards aventurine that sparkle did and if that makes aventurine/ratio a bad thing to ship (??????????), more thirstposts about aventurine, 500 billion generic yaois of aventurine and ratio that don't even maintain either of their characters*
me:
#HONKAI STAR RAIL IS SO GOOD AND YET NO ONE SEEMS TO WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT MAKES IT GOOD#I FEEL ACTUALLY INSANE#I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE STORY!!!!! AND THE CHARACTERS AS INDIVIDUALS#NOT ABOUT HOW HOT THEY ARE OR WHO THEY CAN BE SHIPPED WITH#aventurine isn't even that sexy his eyes are the most interesting part about his design (HIS DESIGN. HIS CHARACTER IS MORE INTRIGUING)#the rest of it is just kind of ... like. yeah he's a blonde man. ok.#and my thoughts on aventio are i think ratio would betray aventurine for a single corn chip. and aventurine would do the same#i do not see a romance ever blossoming there. not even an enemies to lovers kinda thing. they're both too busy playing 5d chess for that#i want to talk about FIREFLY. I LOVED FIREFLY :(#i want to talk about acheron. and MISHA. SWEET BOY WHAT'S GOING ON?#there's so many interesting things going on rn and aventurine is not one of them.#like ok he knows some things but he's such a sleazy businessman about sharing info that idgaf i don't want to learn anything from him#he's always going to leave something out. because he needs to always have an advantage. for this reason i ignore 80% of what he says#i've gotten more context and clues out of everyone else he is nothing to me. i'll eat him.
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God I wish my brain didn't shut down the moment I try to actually write down anything about my OCs/ideas/etc. I've got some freaks knocking around in here y'all would go wild for.
#My personal blorbo Asherah began as a knockoff Marika but boy she's a lot more now#orphan raised as a sacrificial priestess to the Sun/Heaven's Firstborn#finagled her way into being high priestess and kept the Sun at bay by making herself invaluable and sacrificing the other priestesses#which she never forgave herself for#she also sacrificed giant Kingdom Death style white lions which she would eventually kind of take up as her personal symbol/totem#uses a plucky barbarian hero who somehow managed to do the impossible and downed the leader of the invading faeries#which earned him an audience with the Sun#(who was going to eat him)#instead Asherah and the priestesses (along with the Stars who are cousins of the gods who got the short end of the stick) set a trap#and she and Ansu (the hero guy) trap/weaken the Sun in its own chariot/ship and slaughtered it (with the ghosts of the priestesses/lions)#then drove the chariot to heaven to threaten God itself into actually respecting humanity (instead of viewing them as prayer cattle)#bathing in the ichor of the Sun made them both Immortal immortal#as in can't die ever bc they're barred from the afterlife and infused with incorruptible divine light#They had a brief romance and a political marriage but neither actually want it#but they're undying and keep running back into each other#They both dealt with immortality poorly#Asherah became obsessed with legacy and control so that she would *never* be victimized like that again#nor would her children (so long as they do what she says)#and Ansu wants nothing more than to escape the destiny as hero king but due to being a basically normal guy/“guy” who killed two gods#fate has it out for Ansu#This was like ten thousand years before the modern day#basically all of the settings history has been these two assholes and their immediate family causing problems
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completely normal roommates bonding over completely normal things like *flips through notes* murdering each other and having complicated opinions on giant alien bats
#continuing my brainrot over this weird bat i made up: the saga#yin art#fallen london#they're fallen london ocs. it technically counts. even if one is imported from another school#everytime i draw the scoundrel they get a little bit more creature and that is so wonderful#also their coattails became curly. i dont know how or when this happened. they've just sorta got a little train#like a loser#if the anatomy looks weird that is because i am also a loser and fail and lame.#anyway. the scientist! he made a cameo! he's just chillin! my lovely guy who exists to be tormented forever and ever#no he doesn't wash that coat. no he probably doesn't wash. stinky guy. he'd probably eat the soap if he tried#he is going through the horrors every second of every day and still he finds time to lace up his boots and serve like that#what an icon#also the scoundrel doesn't actually probably wear their robe like that. i mean they would but it's not like a design update thing#they just have it for this doodle bc it's a cute nod to their batsona#ive run out of things to talk about. guys. they exist. gestures at them. you can imagine the rest.#oh and there's a spade. of course.#because if you know you know 🏠#my condolences to everyone else in the FL tag who's normal and sane. makes you look at my cartoon ass ocs#no apologies to my followers however this is the price you pay for letting me exist unfiltered on your dashboard#scoundrelventures
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.
#remind me to never ask my mother for opinions on absolutely anything ever again#i only wanted to see which illustration should go on my portfolio for kidlit art#and her wonderful opinion was to take out an illustration of two dudes EATING TOGETHER because and i quote#"gay relationships are not suitable for children books. it simply isn't their target audience''#does she need the list of the thousand of books that are literally about gay couples or about gay kids?!#they're not even like overtly gay they are literally eating together!!! (sure it is actually gay cause it's fanart of a bl but whatever lol#it's literally two guys sitting at the same table eating...#how is that not appropriate for children?!#also even if they were gettin married or whatever... how's that inappropiate?!#ALSO also i'm sick of reading in every illustration agency how they're looking for artists and writers and whatever who tackle queer storie#like sure i'm not gonna say gay people don't experience discrimination but it's not the fucking 50s... there are opportunities out there#idk i'm just so fuckin upset right now because she's saying I'M the one that's taking it bad#like the whole ''i'm not homophobic but.... blah blah''#and it drives me up the fucking walls to have to deal with this when the only thing i wanted was to have a char about which drawing looks#the best for a professional portfolio lol#anyways now out of fucking spite i'm gonna send all the gay ones i have lol#dkfjhkdfg#angel talks#personal#wish me luck on this email btw i need work!#dfkjghdfg
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ngl these "which eoran god is/isn't problematic" polls make me wanna rant about Magran but I don't have the braincells rn
edit: i did end up ranting in the tags whoopsie lmao
#hablaty#I love magran as a character and as an... imperfect to say the least goddess#but I will also blow a gasket if my fire godlike watcher won't ever get the option to drive a sword through her heart#bc holy shit do i also hate her#she too is a ''god of staying in your lane'' really she only ever steps in to intervene if some god or another starts shit#thing is tho: her followers aren't like her#a lot of folks of the violent murder hobo variety is drawn to her bc god of fire and war and whatnot#but if you read the codex entries on her she doesn't actually urge people to start wars#the doctrines are actually more along the lines of ''don't start shit take no shit'' or idk#don't go out of your way to start a conflict for no reason but be always ready for war basically#she pushes people to embrace their power and strive for bettering themselves through struggle#problem is that bc like i said she ghosts her followers a lot of her followers will just take these doctrines to justify their atrocities#she doesn't want eothasians gone bc she doesn't care enough about them to want that#she doesn't want animancers gone bc she supports animancy#but she won't stop her followers bc she doesn't interfere with kith unless she has to protect them from the other gods#but also on the flip side if she does step in she will stop at nothing to win#even if that means building god killing weapons and then having her priests off themselves deploying it#even if that means wiping out her own fire giant children in a volcanic eruption (whomst you can save btw pls save the rathunn they're nice#and even if that means eating the souls of her godlike children who#magran is incredible cruel and also very cool and I have very complex feelings on her and just aaaa
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Honestly a lot of the time, it's not even about people having to agree with me, it's about needing to know that they actually heard and listened to what I had to say even if it didn't persuade them
Just... some basic indication that there's enough respect to give a shit about what I said, and also to make sure that they disagree because they actually disagree and not cause they just didn't bother listening
It's all I really ask
#I forgot what this was about part way through writing about it; but then I remembered it's about Ukraine#like I just need to know that you actually understand what's happening there and what people are going through#you want me to care about your thing? show me you have any any any grasp of what's going on in Ukraine#it's uh... it's too many friends where if I'm just honest... this is about them#people I adore but people where... I don't know if they ever even once listen to what I have to say#...though maybe it's better this way... at least if they just ignore me I can say they just don't understand what's going on#that they're just being fed lines by other people or don't care#...if... they... knew the shit Ukrainians go through and still didn't care... would be a lot harder to respect them#would take a certain level of callous to do that and... these are people I care about very much so#...but I don't know; eats at me... you know#...and even on less serious topics... boy I wish you'd ever listen to me#if it weren't for the fact you say you like me... I'd be pretty damn sure you can't fucking stand me and I do nothing but annoy you#...I don't know if you've... ever... listened to anything I've said on any subject#when you do; you usually correct me... even though; brilliant as you are... you're erm... not always right#I don't get it... I don't get you... every word I say seems to be wrong... I'm so stupid and you're so smart#and yet you get real upset when I want to die... so you must actually like me and our communication styles don't match up#thank god you never seem to read my tags... or... much of anything else I say#truthfully I'd follow you anywhere; and you can treat me any way you want#but man I don't think my thoughts or opinions matter to you even a little... I think I just exist to be your rubber duck#...that's how it feels anyway#but all that aside... just wish you'd listen to me on Ukraine cause it actually matters#this post started out about some other people too... and sure... I like them well enough; and they're maddeningly wrong#like sputnik levels or wrong#drives me nuts; like you're not stupid and you're not cruel so why do you act so stupid and cruel?... turn you brain on#but uh... I actually just don't care about them that much#where as you... I could put it into words... but I won't#it's just a shame... like forget any of the stuff about me; it's just you're so kind... wish you'd care about what's going on in Ukraine#...I gotta stop or I'll go on all night; and I'm already too tired#mm tag so i can find things later
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