#and if they have it so we can keep smooching them after the quest

[raenef]

i hope they dont skimp out on the new year kiss it better be a sloppy 30 minute make out session i expect nothing less, DE.

[ninapi]

Glitched

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Premise: Rintarou unexpectedly meets the girl of his dreams through an online game and he does his best to find this mysterious girl in the real world and keep her for good.

Word Count: 3289

Note: Hello, my beautiful dumplings. Welcome to my Suna miniseries, huhuhu. This will be a short story (4 chapters lol sorry, that’s my definition of short 🙃 sometimes I wonder how people write complete stories under 800 words, I just cant-), while I prepare for my new big series. Some high school drama, no multiple endings or routes just one~ Smooches for all of you.

Warning: Mild spoilers, if you’re up to date with the anime you’ll be just fine.

Chapter 1: Not so bad.

Suna Rintarou was by no means enjoying his second year of high school. Summer weather was definitely not his favorite, always tough on him, but the agony was even worse this year. He was tired, not just physically but mentally, the toll of dealing not only with his own sense of failure but also his teammates who were gravely disappointed of not being able to give their captain the satisfaction of going to the finals and bring victory to their school in his last year on the team.

It hasn’t been long since Inarizaki lost to Karasuno, which meant the practice schedule has increased not only in frequency but also in intensity. Days were very long and every single muscle in Suna’s body hurt. He was really looking forward to the holiday weekend, meaning he would have an extra day to rest.

His classmates were raving about this new online game that had recently come out and was very popular. They had plans to play together during the weekend and advance into one of the heaviest of dungeons before classes resumed, but their plan came to a sudden stop, the twins were being dragged by their mother into a family wedding across the country and they wouldn’t be able to join the team.

The boys were devastated, whining men heard all over the class. They were really counting on the Miya power to beat the hell out of the dungeon boss, help was needed desperately.

¨Hey Suna, I know you said you didn’t like the gameplay you watched the other day but can you please join our team? Without Osamu in our side we are doomed.¨ Suna heaved a deep sigh, collapsing on top of his desk. ¨Am I your last option? Can’t you find someone who really wants to play this? I’m so tired, I was planning on staying in bed all weekend.¨ Osamu pulled him back up, giving him a stern look, ¨Come on, help your mates. I wish I could stay and beat them up but there’s nothing we can do about it, it’s just for this weekend, we’ll be back for the next and continue where you left off.¨ he really didn’t want to do this, but if he didn’t agree to it they wouldn’t shut up until he did, ¨Fine, text me the link. I’ll be there after dinner.¨ the boys were smothering him with hugs and trying to kiss off his face in joy, making him grimace as he shook them all off and went back to sleep on his very comfy desk. The thought of finally resting this weekend turning into nothing but a sad memory.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

The guys added him to a group chat and everything was ready for the first quest. 

His sister tied his hair up at the front in a tiny ponytail so he would look like some of those cute game-streamers she watches, not caring if her brother needed it or not with his hairstyle. He was beyond annoyed with life in general, why do people not leave him alone, even his sister was now conspiring to destroy his peaceful long holiday weekend, ¨Curse those damn twins. It’s all their fault.¨ he was grumbling under his breath while putting his headset on and going in the game to create his character.

¨Alright guys, let’s go level up first, stay in this area and let’s meet up at the bottom of the hill when you reach level 20, then we’ll move in to the forest.¨ they all hummed in acknowledgement, breaking the group. Suna went off to chase some slimes and smaller monsters, hating his life every second of it, the game had a very cute looking art style and it was just not his jam at all. He found it hilarious though that the toughest guys in his class were all hunting cute rabbits and crying over it out loud and in their shared group chat space, so he made sure to screenshot some of those moments, posting them in his account and tagging all his playmates. He had to get something out of this torture, at least he could make fun of them for a while.

His character stopped moving and it turned into a pixel block, ¨Guys, is the game acting up or is it just mine?¨ he could only hear static coming through his headset and some of the guys were posting on the chat that the game kicked them out and they were rebooting their pc, so he just stayed there waiting for the rest to go back in. His character was still a bit glitchy but it was moving now. Then all of the sudden he heard a very loud screech pressed to his left ear, and he was positive that it was not human. ¨Oh my god, sausage! What are you doing to my poor headset? Leave it alone!!¨ saying he was confused was an understatement, all the players in his team were dudes, ¨Ehm, hi?¨ the line went quiet but he wasn’t hearing any more static, just some shuffling on the other side, ¨Who’s this?¨ you were sitting on your chair now, the fluff ball being kicked out of your room for good. ¨Uhm, Rintarou? How about you? Did the guys call you over? I didn’t hear anything about any girl joining our party.¨ Rintarou? What- you were just chatting with your girlfriends when your cat jumped on you and stole your headset, there was no Rintarou in that group, ¨I'm (Y/N). Are you Miyuki’s boyfriend?¨ Miyuki? Was there a Miyuki in his class? It was possible, not like he knows everybody but this was all so confusing, ¨Nope, definitely not that Rintarou. So you are not with the guys either? How did you get into the group? The game didn’t say someone new joined the party.¨ 

You were so confused, you could see your actual party on the screen and on the side chat but you couldn’t hear them talk, just this random guy, ¨Did your game get glitchy too? Maybe that’s how you ended up in my party.¨ he moved his character around, looking for you, but he was completely alone in the area, some of the guys still complaining about the game not letting them in through his phone. ¨Well, I mean yes. It did get glitchy but I can still see my girls playing on my screen, could it be just the audio that got crossed over somehow?¨ it was so weird, none of the girls even noticed your absence, you said you were having some troubles with your headset and so they just continued killing monsters, ¨Yeah, I don’t see you around me either, so I guess it’s just the audio getting messy. Hold on, Imma log out and see if that resets us back to normal.¨ you nodded even if he couldn’t see you. ¨Ugh, what the hell. The logout button is gone. How about you, do you see it?¨ you were checking everywhere in your screen, it was definitely not where it usually is, ¨It’s gone for me too. I bet it’s just still glitchy and will go back to normal in a bit, if it’s fine with you, we could just keep playing like this until the game fixes itself?¨ he was already back to killing slimes, way over level 20 by now and his classmates were still gone, ¨Yeah, fine with me.¨ 

Both of you continued doing your thing in complete silence, so much so that Suna forgot you were still there and started mumbling curses quietly, he was being targeted by larger monsters now and was still on his own, he didn’t know much about this game and he was loosing HP fast, ¨What’s wrong?¨ your soft voice startled him, his ears flushing bright red in embarrassment, ¨Sorry, I forgot you were still there. Just being attacked by inferno wolves, don’t know how to kill them, today is my first day playing this.¨ you chuckled quietly, he was kindda cute, those were very easy to kill lesser monsters, ¨Just jump on them and stomp hard.¨ he did as instructed, killing one instantly, ¨Oh wow that was easy, thanks. Are you like a guild master or something?¨ that made you smile, you were right, he was cute. ¨Nothing of the sort, just been playing this for longer. Let me know if you need more help, I know my fair share of tricks.¨ 

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

He was about to just ‘x’ out the game since the logout button was still gone, it was 9:30 and none of the guys were able to log back in, the game refusing to accept them, it was a waste of time, he didn’t even want to play this ridiculous game, the happy tune coming out of it was driving him insane at this point, that was until he heard your quiet giggles, it made him curious. They started soft, he almost thought he’d imagined it, but they grew louder each second and without realizing it, he was smiling, ¨What is it?¨ he wasn’t going to say anything but he just needed to know what was causing the cute fit of giggles on the other side, or he wasn’t going to be able to sleep in peace. ¨You heard that? Oh no, so embarrassing. Sorry, my cat, he is crazy you see. Earlier he was chewing on my headset so I kicked him out, but he got out of the house and got back into my room climbing all the way to the window, he’s like a ninja! And was nuzzling my tummy just now, I’m very ticklish.¨ was it normal for such a story to be this cute? Since when does he find cat ninjas cute? Why does he feel the need to tickle an unknown woman-

¨Was that sausage?¨ he chuckled evilly, wanting to continue the conversation, ¨Oh GOD, you heard that too? This game is like boycotting my life, I’m telling you. But yes, that’s sausage. He’s very heavy and of a brownish tone so he kindda looks like one, that’s why we named him that.¨ it’s not like he was interested in cats, but this was way better than killing blue pixel blobs, ¨It’s kay, I find names like that fun, I really don’t like when people name their pets, I don’t know Steve or something,¨ that caused you to laugh loud and clear, getting stabbed by a monster in the process, which made you just laugh even more, ¨Steve? What? Who would name their cat Steve?¨ you let your character bleed to death and were now hugging one of your pillows while sipping on some juice you had left, getting comfy on your chair. ¨Believe it or not, I’ve seen things, specially since I got in my current school volleyball team, there you see crazy, crazy stuff.¨ so he played volleyball…you’re nowhere near athletic but damn, he sounded like an interesting individual. The night was nothing like what you expected it to be, it was getting better every second.

Time surely flies when you’re actually having fun. He got some fruit jelly out and was chewing on it while speaking, needing some extra sugar to stay awake longer, ¨Are you eating fruit jelly?¨ he sits up right away, making sure his cam was actually off, ¨How do you know? Is this game livestreaming now or-?¨ you wished, ¨Hahaha no, it’s just that they make this sound, you know what I mean? Like when you suck the jelly out? I know I’m weird, I’m so sorry.¨ was he making sucking sounds just now? Why was he blushing? He didn’t know his favorite snack made suggestive sounds, well, that was embarrassing, he didn’t do that on purpose, ¨Ugh, well yeah you got me there, I’m eating fruit jelly. But I don’t think you’re that weird. Just a bit.¨ now you were the one blushing, it was fun talking to him, you've been talking about everything and nothing in particular at the same time for the last couple of hours and it was nearly midnight now. ¨Hey, is your game still glitchy? My chara is like dead now but still let’s me talk to you, I think there’s something really wrong with this game today.¨ his character was sitting down on a daisy field, enjoying his life as much as his owner, no monsters in sight, but the logout button was still not available, ¨Yeah, well I’m not dead, but things look the same, my mates were also complaining because the game kicked them out and didn’t let them back in.¨ he actually lied to his classmates and told them he was going to bed like twenty minutes ago but he just wasn’t capable of telling you how tired he actually was, ¨Hm, yeah I don’t think it’s going to let us sign out tonight, should we leave it open and just go to bed? It’s getting late and even if there’s no school tomorrow we should probably get going.¨ so you were in school too, your voice sounded right about his age but he didn’t know how to ask without sounding like a creepy old man, ¨Yeah I was thinking of going to bed too but sausage wouldn’t let us go.¨ us, huh? you smiled bashfully, playing with the headset cord, ¨Sausage is like that, I think he likes to hear your voice.¨ oh boy, was he smitten, he didn’t know much about you or what you looked like even but he wanted more of this, whatever that was, ¨Well then that means we gotta keep talking so he can hear it some more, maybe then he won’t eat your headset.¨ he could hear your giggles once more, they were creating a hole in his stomach, pretty sure it was eating itself out at your cuteness, he just wanted to continue hearing them, people never laughs at his comments, this was a first you actually thought he was funny, ¨We should. Do you think if we just don’t close the game it would stay like this? I mean like the audio and all…? Maybe we could talk some more tomorrow.¨ were you asking him on a date? That was a date, definitely. ¨Yeah I can do that, anything for sausage’s sake.¨ you were both grinning at the screen like idiots, not wanting to leave, ¨Then, since it’s the weekend how about we come back in the morning? Oh wait no, here in Miyagi the holidays are important, I gotta go to the shrine early, but how about after lunch?¨ he was so tired that even getting up by lunch time seemed like a task, but he would gladly lose sleep for this, ¨Yup, can do. See you tomorrow, sausage girl.¨ both of you left the pc on and went to bed, the smile on both of your faces causing your cheeks to hurt. 

He was cute, you’ve never had so much fun talking with a guy before, it all felt so natural like if you were talking with your best friend, like if you’ve known him since forever. You wondered if asking for his number would be too bold, he was funny and you just wanted to talk to him some more, maybe even meet him one day. Just thinking about it was making you feel giddy, your legs kicking on your bed as you squealed against your pillow, trying your best to quiet down your excitement and not wake your mother up.

Suna was on his bed thinking the very same thing, would it be weird to ask for your number? You were complete strangers, but that’s how people make friends, right? Not weird at all. He rarely had intentions of talking with any girl but talking to you tonight has been the highlight of his year and he wasn’t exaggerating. He didn’t even know he could laugh this much, Suna just couldn’t wait anymore, he was sure he wanted this to continue and with new resolution, he went to sleep, hoping noon would come fast, so he could ask for your number and maybe, hopefully, get to see you even if it was just through his phone, he just needed to put a face to this bubbly feeling inside his chest.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

When he woke up the following morning he noticed his pc was off, this causing him to go into panic mode, what happened? He made sure it would stay on all night-

¨MOOOOM, why is my pc off? Did you touch it?¨ he was pissed, anything but that, not the pc. ¨What? No I didn’t. I think we lost power for a bit earlier, your dad was trying to fix the oven and was messing with the power box.¨ that explains it but it wasn’t less aggravating, would he even be able to go in the game again or would he be kicked out like his mates.

He turned it back on as fast as he could, going in the game, but luck wasn’t on his side, two of his classmates were already in leveling up on his screen. He grabbed his headset and literally screamed on the mic, ¨(Y/N), please tell me you are there.¨ but he could hear very manly snorts on the other side, crushing his heart ¨Who’s (Y/N)? Your girlfriend, Suna?¨ he just couldn’t deal with them right now. He rebooted his pc in hopes of getting the line back up to yours, but when he did, he saw a notification pop up on his screen, ¨We apologize for all the troubles caused last night, as an apology, we’ve sent 100 diamonds and 2 HP refills into your inbox.¨ 

No, this couldn’t be happening. They fixed it overnight. He hadn’t ask you for your number yet, that’s what he was going to do as soon as he heard your beautiful voice.

You were fixing your make up, silly thing to do since he couldn’t even see you, but it was definitely a date. You got your headset on with a bright smile on your face as you saw your screen moving, the game still playing on the background, ¨Morning, Mr. Sausage. Got a nice sleep?¨ your friends were beyond shocked, ¨Mr.Sausage? (Y/N) are you talking to your cat again? I think you need to go out some more.¨ Miyuki? No, no, no, no, why??? Where was he? What happened? You didn’t turn the game off, he should still be there! ¨Yeah…did they fix the game? I can hear you guys just fine now.¨ you were seriously hoping he was just late and would jump in the conversation any second now, ¨Mhm, they gave us some dias, check your inbox. You can buy the sword you wanted with that!¨ Stupid sword, you didn’t want it anymore, not if that meant not being able to talk to him again. ¨Sorry guys, I…I’m login out for the day.¨ without another word you just closed your laptop and collapsed face first onto your bed, life sucked.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

Tuesday couldn’t come faster for Suna, he just ran over to the class next door almost clashing with the wall, ¨ATSUMU! I need your help.¨ the eldest twin glared at him with intensity, couldn’t he see what time was it? Why would someone ask for a favor so early in the morning ? He was barely awake after getting up at four to jog. ¨Tell me later, maybe during lunch break when I can actually listen to you.¨

He threw his bag on the floor and went over to the tired setter, shaking him lightly, ¨Please, only you can help me.¨ what could be this important? He looked over at the middle blocker giving him a dirty angry look, but he was sporting a not so fashionable pair of bags under his eyes, even his skin tone was a bit off, was he not supposed to rest for three days? This made him reconsider his actions, ¨What is it? Stop shaking me, dammit!¨ he sat down on the chair in front of his desk, serious mode on, ¨You have the phone number of the Karasuno setter right?¨ huh? this was definitely not worth the while, he went back to sleep on his desk, ¨Atsumu please! I need you to ask him something, please I’ll beg if you want me to.¨ he’s never seen him this desperate, ¨kay, I think I do, yeah he should be on the group chat. What do you need from him?¨ he was pulling out his phone, ready to rely the message and hopefully go back to sleep, ¨Can you ask him if he knows a girl named (Y/N)¨ a girl? This was unexpectedly interesting. ¨(Y/N) what? Is she from Karasuno?¨ he was punching the message out, waiting on the details, ¨Well I don’t know, all I know is her first name and that she lives in Miyagi, she goes to school there and is possibly around our age.¨ Atsumu couldn’t believe what he was hearing, talk about dumb teammates, ¨You do know Miyagi is a prefecture, right? Not a city. How many schools are there even in Miyagi? Why would Tobio-kun know her? You are being stupid, Suna.¨ he was deleting the message, shaking his head, ¨No, no, please just ask him. I know he probably won’t know her but is my only chance, please. I won’t bother you again if he says he doesn’t know…¨ the setter sighed, sending the ambiguous message out, this was really silly, but he could see how desperate his friend was, and he just wouldn’t let him sleep ever if he didn’t comply. 

To their surprise, Kageyama replied almost immediately, ¨I don’t, but I’ll ask around.¨ Atsumu showed him his screen and the small smile that painted his features left the setter breathless, so he can smile-

¨Thanks, please let me know if he says anything else.¨ he would find you, no matter what.

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Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf

Masterlist Next Chapter

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

4, 16 and 21 for the tav questions!

Thank you, omg, somehow I did not anticipate one of these 😅. Also I'm doing this for both my Tavs because I love Mardora & Guemarir equally

4: What would your Tav's romance scenes look like? How many would they have?

For Mardora, I think she'd have 4 if you picking her to spend time with at the Tiefling party counts? The first one/tiefling party would be pretty lowkey & sweet. Drinking together to celebrate & having a quick little kiss before Mardora sends Tav/Durge to bed because "we should make this choice with clearer heads;" the second one (also in Act 1) would be a "we have clear heads now" followup. Third scene is after you've unlocked some quest progression you can only do in Act 2/learned her backtory & Tav/Durge gets the option to be like "Mardora, you don't have to take care of me, let me take care of you this time" (save her from being a people pleaser, please). And then finally, in Act 3, there'd be a really sweet star gazing scene where she talks to Tav/Durge about dwarf stuff & reveals she's been calling them the sappiest, most intimate-&-reserved-for-life-partners pet-name in existence ever since hitting "excellent" opinion/reaching Act 3 (depending on when you hit scenes/vs approval)

Guemarir feels a little tougher to figure out because you are definitely, 100% able to flirt with him from moment 1. You meet that man & you are immediately able to tell him how pretty he is & how much you want to hit (because believe me bestie, he's doing the same). I think he'd have more than Mardora just by virtue of his own sluttery. Maybe 5? I do not know what is a normal amount of romance scenes because I've only finished Lae'zel's & I'm maybe only halfway done with Astarion's? This ain't about them though.

So I think Guemarir's tiefling party night would be him promising to stop being a tease & finally give Tav/Durge that dick after the party's died down & he's not entertaining people with his ✨️dulcet tones✨️ anymore. The second scene is about Guemarir having tiefling angst & daddy issues because by this point the refugees are on the way to Baldur's Gate & you've definitely encountered his dad, so he's having a rare moment of depth; Tav/Durge has the option to comfort him & give him a lil smooch, mayhaps cuddle by the fire at camp. Scene 3 is at the beginning of Act 2, & Guemarir apologizes for his moment of vulnerability "won't happen again, silly manwhore hours only from here on out," & Tav/Durge can talk him through not having to put on a persona with them because of sincere feelings. Guemarir is taken aback, but jazzed because this is new territory for him. Scene 4 is Guemarir trying very, very hard to take Tav/Durge on a "date" at camp; he made dinner, there's a tablecloth on a stump, he lit candles, he plays a love song on his lyre. It's very precious & he is doing his best to do sincere romance instead of "wham, bam, thank you ma'am/man." Last scene is in Act 3, Guemarir invites Tav/Durge to hang out with him & he has a really sweet talk with them about being grateful for them giving him the opportunity to have a romantic relationship instead of just a bunch of random hookups, Guemarir & Tav/Durge can fuck at the end of this scene, though.

16: What do they do for fun when not adventuring? What are their hobbies?

Mardora is a huge book worm, she reads a lot when not adventuring. Maybe not as much reading as Gale, but enough to discuss books with everyone's favorite magic item eating wizard to a pretty satisfying capacity on his end. She also keeps a very meticulous journal, & she knows how to make jewelry. She's not good at it, but she can do it, & being able to do something even kinda rudimentary with metal is a source of pride for her because Dwarf.

Guemarir's whole thing is being a wandering bard (and slut), so he's mostly just playing music. I feel like he's dabbled in poetry & writing his own compositions, but never in any kind of serious way he likes showing to people. He also knows a lot about tea & is a pretty decent cook!

21: Describe a defining moment from their past which makes them who they are today!

When Mardora was the dwarf equivalent to, like, 10, she got separated from her mom while they were out-and-about, & it was a priest of Moradin who calmed little Mardora down & helped her. That plus getting the virtues of the dwarffather & of helping others in a personal, one-on-one way while looking for her mom left a big impression & very much laid the foundations for a lot of later events that turned her into the Mom Friend Ultimate Good Guy she is by the start of the game.

13-year-old Guemarir was forever altered when he met his dad for the first time & found out he's the son of his mom's patron. Until then he just kind of...had not questioned why a half-elf's kids were tieflings? He probably had some theories about a tiefling baby daddy, but learning him & his 2 siblings are fully a demon's kids & that he's got boocoo half siblings left an impression. Especially since his dad is just, like, really invested in having a lot of (his own) kids at his disposal "if he needs them." That whole thing just really made him...kinda judgemental & gave him some very, very hard stances on making deals with devils.

[fatuismooches]

Hello smooches, its been a while since i popped up in your inbox again 😔 i really hope that you are still doing well. I finally have some free time omg 😭 i just completed the new archon quest and its so gooooooooddddddd 💞😖🛐 Navia and Neuvillette in the archon quest are so 👌👌*chef's kiss* and i LOVE the debate mechanic when we tried to solve the murder case so much, its really fun. They are giving me Danganronpa vibes 😩👌

AND THE UNDERWATER EXPLORATION OMGDFGSDBFNFMDNSKDH IT IS SO BREATHAKING AND THE SEALS AND THE OTTERS???? THEY ARE SO CUTEEEEE 🥺💞 (especially the seals, *clenches heart* gosh i love seals so much and they are one of my top 3 fav animals still to this day. I'm also marking every seals location on my map whenever i found them 👀)

Gosh now i can see why a lot of people love Fontaine so much, i really hope they will use the same mechanic on the next update later. Now i need to 100% exploration and do the event (i missed a lot of them 😭 rip primogems-). I'm so conflicted rn, either i should keep saving my primos for Capitano or trying to get one Neuvillette and his sign weapon.. but i currently have 347 IFs 😭 both of them are holding me on the chokehold- 😭 if i wasn't hospitalized back then and busy, i should've around 410-430 IFs rn.. 😔

-🥝

(I can't wait to devour ALL of ur recent works and rambles with other people and anons, smooches 🙏🛐 i just saw 3 of them before writing this and i'm already on my knees-)

🥝 ANON OMG HIIII IT'S BEEN SO LONG!! 😭❤️❤️ I'M SO GLAD TO SEE YOU AGAIN!! I am doing well, I hope you've been doing better now too 🥰 And YES I know the Fontaine Archon Quests were AMAZING 😭 I love the court trial stuff, it feels like a breath of fresh air from all the past quests :3 It took me back to my Danganronpa and Ace Attorney days too 😅 Navia and Neuv were my favs as well along with Furina. They're amazing and so pretty!

I KNOWWW i love exploring underwater, it's such an experience 🥺 AND YES THE SEALS AND OTTERS ARE SO CUTE. Whenever I see them laying on the shore I just smile because they're sooo cutie patootie omg 😭 But wow you're really dedicated, marking all the seals location! That's very cute <33 I'm not sure if there's going to be court cases next update though? The 4.1 update is focused on us breaking into the fortress so another trial will probably be later on after all that is done. And don't worry about primos too much, take care of yourself first alright? If you ask me though Capitano is still quite far from releasing so I would go for Neuvillette if you really love him (I'm pulling for him as well!) His signature weapon though... I don't know about that 😅 I never wish on weapon banners unless I have enough wishes and if that character is at my absolute top. So I would think about it carefully. But the decision is up to you!

Hehe I hope you have fun reading through my posts! I promise they're pretty juicy 🤭 Sending you lots of love 🥝 anon! ❤️

[autumnslance]

How did you determine what type of adventurers your characters would be? I have a character I adore, but I can't figure out her voice, or is it my voice I'm hearing? A friend asked me what my character's goal was after she became an adventurer and arrived in Eorzea, and I had no clear answer. How do you tell when your character wants to go a specific route and not you, the creator? I am watching an anime this evening; one of the quotes was "Every idol grows in a unique way, so there's no single right answer." My brain took it as "every adventurer/Warrior of Light grows in their own unique way, so there's no single right answer." I would love some insight from a fellow player!

To be honest, I also often struggle with defining my characters goals and voices right away. Sometimes it takes writing out stories of their reactions to events in MSQ, sometimes it takes chatting with friends and coming up with scenarios and jokes and pseudo-stories together; the "campfire stories" aspect of Discord chats, both text and voice.

Part of it comes from my characters' histories, even in the early, general rough stages: where did they come from, how did that place and time shape them, what events, what about the people they grew up around, affected them? No one's born and lives in a vacuum, springing fully formed as a player avatar does in the game world; if we want them to be characters, with stories to tell in roleplay and/or fanfiction, then we take those background elements into account.

The reasons I play through the MSQ more than once--with alts and/or via New Game+ now--is not only to solidify the basic lore in my head, but also because that first play through, I'm as blind as anyone else and having my own knee-jerk reactions to events as I puzzle out what's going to happen next, the whys, the hows, etc.

But on subsequent playthroughs I can take my time, really think about "how does X character respond to this? Why?" Like I knew on Aeryn's playthrough (my second play of EW) that Dark and C'oretta would come help in Garlemald--but Iyna couldn't and wouldn't. Her own wounds from growing up under Imperial subjugation and pushed through the military system are still too raw. So she In Character does other things during that stretch of story. Likewise, though Dark's best known as a Bard, she's the one of my alts who In Character did the Tank Role Quest--because Gridania is her home, so she answered that call for her help with her axe in hand.

I think this year's Rising story with Nhagi having to remember why he started adventuring in the first place is also a good thing to keep in mind; maybe the character doesn't have a defined, granular goal at the moment. At least nothing overarching, no real endgame. But they have a reason they chose, and stay on, this path of adventure. Maybe those reasons are the same, maybe they're different now.

"Characters must want something for a good narrative" is true in traditional stories; in open ended roleplay those goals can be more nebulous, shifting, and varied, in my opinion, and even following the fanfic of a RPGMMO character can feel that way. Sometimes a character doesn't have a defined goal yet, or attained a goal and now needs something else but in the meantime they're drifting a bit.

And we kinda saw that for the WoL, too, in 6.1; the Scions attained all their goals, and the world was saved. What's an adventurer to do? Well, we found "simple" new adventures with some friends--and ended up with more than bargained for, in this trip to the Void!

As for telling when my character wants a different path than what I intend...it's why Aeryn's a "successful" character to me. She does things I didn't intend all the time. Like smooch a damn rogue.

Which I think I answered pretty thoroughly in some asks earlier this year, about how and why I ended up falling into a ship, and then how I see the adage about "the character does their own thing/out of my control" thing so many writers talk about.

[drewoclock]

Quest for the Feminine Man Butt

Originally published March 29th, 2014

It’s a question that has been etched upon the grainy walls of time, plaguing those whom have long been forgotten.  A more acute philospher might call it a riddle, for how else could you refer to the classic duel between an ass and an arm?  Blasphemy, tomfoolery—unadulterated poppycock perhaps.  Denominate it what you will, it remains a milestone for the progressive thinker.  And I’m here to settle it, once and for all.

For most young men my age, the problem with ladies is “How in the world am I going to entreat that beautiful lass to bestow upon me a mighty smooch?”  Their goals, generalized, seem to be “winning” the girl.  But I think a bit differently.  My problem with ladies is “How in the world am I going to be as attractive as that lady?”

I of course consider that I’m hormonally biased.  In an erection contest between a lady, a man, and a box of crayons, the lady would at least place a solid second.  But just like the eraser of a pencil, that’s not the point.  The point is that ladies have the world’s blessing to wear makeup, and all kinds of outfits, and honestly, I’m jealous of it.

Of course I’ve considered dressing myself up this way.  Why would you think that I hadn’t, you freak?  But I’ve been worried.  Girls have this figure to them.  They have the rounded shoulders, the curved hips—they just seem built to be more attractive than me.  And that’s no fun!  That’s like a game of hopscotch with scalene triangles.  I mean, fuck scalene triangles!  Those aren’t fun to hop in at all!

So naturally, I locked myself into my secret thought cave and began furiously researching the biology of a man and a woman, analyzing their aesthetics and scrutinizingly comparing them.  There has to be a way I thought, my eyes bloodshot, my limbs twitching.  A man must be able to be as beautiful as a woman.

And that’s when I came up with a crazy idea: I would invent a scientific ray gun that would turn all men into women.  But after about fourteen minutes of tinkering, I deemed that infeasible and instead developed the ass/arm theory.

The ass/arm theory states that a woman naturally has the best ass, and a man naturally has the best arms.  And aside from those two body parts, the two are equals.  Both can have equally stunning chests, both can have luscious legs, both can have sumptuous genitals—and while one has an ass, the other has arms.  It sounds fair to me!

But suddenly there appeared an apparition of myself, miniature in size and dressed in a penguin outfit.

"Not so fast, Drew.  What about bodybuilding women?" "Why are you dressed as a penguin?" "Shut up, cunt.  What about bodybuilding women?  There’s women out there with huge arms.  Go ahead.  Google search it right now." "Goodness.  You’re right.  These ladies are packing." "Puts a bit of a hole in your theory, huh?  Looks like the ladies can have ass and arm.”

The penguin man had a formidable point.  But I wanted to prove him wrong.

"That’s an exception, though," I said.  "And just like some women can have both, some men can have both.  I’m sure there’s men with beautiful asses.” "Ha!  Good luck finding that!”

And so the search began.  The quest for the feminine man butt.  For longer than I could keep track of, I scoured the cities of the world, aiming my binoculars at any man butt I could find.  I found myself perched in trees, peering through windows as men undressed.  I would swing shopping bags near men’s bottoms, hoping the camera I had hidden inside might peek up their gym shorts.  I signed up for various men’s aerobics classes, just so I could spy on the myriad of jirating fundaments.  I was arrested several times, and paid many fines.  I was threatened with jail time.  But my mission was more important.  I had to do it for my kids.  For my country.  For John Kerry.  I had to prove, once and for all, that we were all equal.

And one day, I saw it.

I blinked, sure I was seeing things.  I had been hiding in this Egyptian trash receptacle for hours.  This had to be an optical trick.  But it wasn’t.  There in the distance was very clearly a man. And his ass was a spectacle of human beauty.

The way his hips curved, unalike a normal man’s.  The way his thighs pressed his ass upward.  Perhaps this man had swayback.  Perhaps he was just built that way.  But there was no denying how supple those ass cheeks were as they waggled mightily in their undersized jeans.  I gazed open-mouthed as the ass appeared to ripple in slow motion.  It was almost as if it were winking at me.  ”You did it, Drew,” I could hear it whisper.  ”You saved the world.”

I made my way back to America and it was only upon entering my apartment that I realized I could have just Google searched a feminine man butt.  But my work was done.  I had proven that an arm could be as great as an ass.  That a man could be as beautiful as a woman.  Smiling, I fell asleep at last, without even removing my eye makeup.

[gutsfics]

Hi bestie 💕 I’ve been playing HSS (since I still can 😈) and I got to a quest where it requires someone Ezra is dating so I’m curious: Did you have any of the main characters dating other characters? If so, who? (i.e., Autumn + Julian, Nissan + Sakura, etc.)

oh there is some Drama in their dating lives

mostly bc i keep breaking them up and setting them up with other people to see how it effects the main story (which its. really not. even though im past the point where pb specifically said "if your classmates are dating each other the story will change!")

originally i had Nishan dating my mc Simon because i thought his date quests were cute, but i broke them up a little after Kara kissed Nish on the cheek in the main quest because even though Simon told Nish it made him uncomfortable, guess who runs after Kara post her breakup with Max? i was tired of Simon being the fourth wheel to Nish's dumb love quadrangle with every single Mean Girl Character (except Mia, but im sure he's crushing on her too). currently both are single

when i first got Ezra, i had him date Julian bc one of the missions was "send Ezra on a date. send Jullian on a date" so i made them date each other. super iconic moment when Ezra yelled at the Zero Hour frontwoman for kissing him and then smooching Julian on stage <3

but i had them break up bc my Fic Canon ive decided that sometime in their adulthood, Wes and Ezra get married for An Alibi for a thing Wes is doing, and then they just stay married bc tax purposes and also they realize they do have feelings for each other (and also Simon. poly ftw). so now Wes and Ezra are together

Koh and Sakura were together for a while bc i really like their dynamic, but i broke them up so Koh and Kallie could date bc one of the main story missions really seemed like them being together would change the dialouge a little. it didnt :( this would also be a win for polycules everywhere bc if i could i would have all three of them dating

i think Mia was dating either Payton or Autumn (maybe both at some point) but now that i have her, Kathrine and Mia are together

and of course naturally, Ryan and Calvin are together (do Not seperate them.) i wish they had more quests though i really like them :(

also i just had a sudden Big Brain Moment which i cant do right now bc Chase is in a quest, but im gonna send Chase and Ellie on a date <3 absolute t4t power couple right there

anyway thats what i like about HWU vs HSS game mechanics wise, is that dating people actually changed the story a little :( i wish we could chose which actually changed the story though bc Chris flirted with Avalon constantly even though they'd been on one date and Avalon was engaged to Hunt. like back off slut (affectionate)

[woeisme-iamwoe]

an absolutely massive Haikyuu!! fic rec pt. 3

KageHina AND KuroKen because I’m very picky with these ships so there’s not a lot :/ 

KageHina:

The Cure for You (is You), by tsunderei (6k. T. canonverse) 

Brooo...cute shit

Kageyama knew they would separate after graduation. He knew he was going to miss Hinata. He just didn’t know he’d still be here, three years later, nursing an old crush that now seems more or less ruined by time and distance and stupidity. 

discovering the smile of one kageyama tobio, by emleewrites (8k. T. canonverse)

Innocence, pure innocence. Those are synonyms, shut up.  

Kageyama blinks once before a grin of his own spreads over his face. Shouyou’s breath halts in his lungs at the sight, and he wills for time to stop, just so he can drink it in. He sees it sometimes, when they’re playing - Kageyama’s fierce smile when they pull a combo off just right, when they show their opponents how possible the impossible can really be. But then there’s another serve, another rally, and the moment is gone.

'Shame', Shouyou thinks to himself, as he lets his eyes roam over Kageyama’s stupidly happy face, taking in the creases that are from joy rather than frowning, for a change. 'It’s a really nice smile.'

-

In which it's their third, and final, year in high school and Hinata has only one goal: to make Kageyama smile outside of volleyball.

 room to grow, by Mysecretfanmoments (6k. T. canonverse)

Third year Kageyama is considerate, careful, doesn't grab Hinata's hair. Hinata's still trying to figure out how he feels about it. 

where the night goes, by bigspoonnoya (20k. M. canon-divergence)

This one is very popular, and for good reason! It's beautiful. 

When their bond loses the immediate context of volleyball, they're left to consider why it's still so vital and important.

Meeting again, by chance, six years later.

 thirty-three days of mist and mountains, by tinygumdrops (curryramyeon) (36k. T. canon-divergence)

Kageyama, that’s a lot of paper, sir. I sure hope you recycle, god damn. 

Tobio runs by himself every day. Even though he can't shake off that awful feeling that something's closing in on him, he still does it. It's habit now.

When he gets a phone call that Hinata Shouyou is thinking of coming to Italy, Tobio feels like he has to run even faster.

(Or: Tobio has a month to prepare himself before his high school rival comes to visit him. They haven't spoken to each other for two years, and Tobio can't even remember what food Hinata likes. He's got a lot to think about.)

 soft serve, by tothemoon (9k words. T. canonverse):

Alternatively, the fic that made me immediately go out and buy a pint of ice cream after reading. So cute and fluffy! We’ve got a socially awkward Kageyama and, if I may, a little bit of a subdued Hinata.  Cute, cute, cute. Want ice cream. 

"I'm gonna run you over with this truck," Kageyama says, with only half of his usual conviction.

(Because frankly, he's still flabbergasted that Hinata would remember his favorite flavor.)

Or, in which Kageyama and Hinata drive an ice cream truck for a week, the former struggles with a crush, and the latter dares to eat the popsicles without paying.

 Fake it, Make it, by zadderlee (50k words. T. canonverse. Unfinished):

Ah yes, the classic fake dating that causes real feelings to arise. Here for the trope, will always be here for the trope. It is an unfinished fic, but it's still worth the read. Actually hilarious and Suga had me rolling. I take back what I said about only feeling safe alone with Iwa, I’d feel safe with Suga (lets be honest, with almost all of the Haikyuu boys. But not Atsumu. Rat bitch (I love him so much). 

"Because Kageyama is already dating someone!"

"Really? Who?"

“Me!” Hinata shouts suddenly, grabbing Kageyama’s hand as an afterthought and grinning triumphantly, like he’s somehow missed the implications of what he’s just done. Kageyama is going to kill him.

 touch, by buu (3k. T. canonverse)

Pure, young love. COVID-19 doesn’t exist yet. (WASH YOUR HANDS, DAMMIT)

Hinata doesn't notice it at first, really. It's small things, natural things, like when they sit together at lunch and Hinata ends up hooking his ankle over Kageyama's and he doesn't move away; in fact, he seems to not notice it, and go on eating his lunch like nothing's different. 

 we are the sparks that never fade, by thecivilunrest (4k. T. injury au)

A Kageyama injury fic and I never realized how painful that could be until I read this work. 

The first thing Hinata tells him after seven years is, “Toss to me.” 

 confession, by buu (3k. T. canonverse)

Just a really short, sweet school-boy love fic.

“You've been an ass to me for three weeks!” Hinata blurts, and finally the weight of it is pushing down on him. He's been trying to ignore it, telling himself it's just Kageyama being Kageyama, but this isn't like him, this is weird, and Hinata hates it. He's miserable.

 kisses, by buu (3k. T. canonverse)

So many smooches! So pure! 

There's a blur and Hinata remembers warm lips, surprisingly soft from someone who frowns all the time, and Kageyama's terrified face when he pulls back, and the electricity running through Hinata's entire body, heating his cheeks to match Kageyama's.

Kissing, it turns out, is as good as volleyball.

 Never More Cruel, by dawnstruck (3k. T. canonverse)

How have you not read this?? I know you haven't, so read it and smoosh in sweetness with me.  

Hinata starts fading away from him, and Kageyama tells himself that he doesn't mind.

Kuroken: 

teach me the way home, by icespyders (22k. T. canonverse)

WHY DOESN'T THIS HAVE MORE HITS?? 

Don’t go far off, not even for a day, because —

because — I don’t know how to say it: a day is long

and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station

when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Kuroo and Kenma grow up in transit.

 Good Calls, MemeKonHQ (MemeKonYA) (4k. T. canonverse)

Captain Kenma, captain Kenma!

His first morning practice as a third year starts with a blur of gray and red moving fast towards him on his peripheral vision the moment he sets foot inside the gym, and then a pair of lanky arms gracelessly falling over him as Lev contorts himself in all sorts of ways to properly envelop him like some sort of octopus.

“Kenma-san!” He basically screams, thankfully far away enough from his sensitive ears that it doesn’t outright hurt. Lev puts his chin over the crown of his head and Kenma sighs, “Kenma-san! I am so happy! Some of the other second years thought you would bail on us! But you didn’t! Now you can keep tossing to me.”

(Or: Kenma's third year. Or part of it.)

 even if you're ahead for a bit, i will catch up, by ghostpot (4k. G. canonverse)

Kuroo sticking to it. 

Kuroo first confesses when they're sticky-fingered, wide-eyed kids, and subsequently every day after that. Kenma takes a while to come around. 

the golden route, by astersandstuff (12k. T. canonverse/road trip au)

Why is it so hard to find good kuroken fics? This is so good, though. Kenma and Kuroo in a van, on the road, kisses, and mackerel pike. 

“It’s a three-and-a-half hour walk,” Kenma points out, on the subject of the cat’s home in a town inside Ama District. “Why aren’t we taking the train?”

“That cancels out the point of a road trip,” Kuroo argues.

“Railroads are roads.”

“We’re currently leading a frugal existence.”

-

Or, in which two childhood friends go on a road trip and Kenma builds up a quest.

 love's not the way to treat a friend, by girltalk (8k. T. canonverse/post-canon)

How sweet! To be each other’s life lines. Drunk Bokuto is the best boy. 

There’s really nothing quite as revelatory as the silent minutes spent in bed during the aftermath of a wet dream involving you and your high-school best friend. 

 the walk home, by skiecas (42k. T. canonverse) 

Gorgeous. Author writes kurokens dynamic growing childhood through adulthood absolutely wonderfully. 

Kenma reluctantly spoons vanilla into his mouth, watching the sun set. And when everything is dusted in stripes of pale orange and purple and gold, he glances at Kuroo’s profile muddled in the shadows of the descending sun, and wonders whether he had somehow accidentally made friends with an impressive sort of boy. The ice-cream melted under his thumb feels maddeningly sticky, like he’ll never wash it away thoroughly enough and it would leave its mark wherever he touched before he could.

Kenma has never really thought of anyone as good-looking before, never really cared enough about these things to notice them. But Kuroo is objectively so, in this light, in this angle—maybe all the time.

(A Kuroo and Kenma life story, told in five acts).

[cabinofimagines]

Lester’s ABCs

A/N: We be loving one awkward, human god -Danny

Warnings: A bit of swearing bc I can’t stop myself

Word count: 1,330

Activities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

I think that he’s pretty chill, he’s a new person now, and enjoys the little things more than he used to, Lester is happy camping in your living room or eating pizza at the park while feeding pigeons. Only when the occasion is really special he would do something more god-like

Beauty - What do they admire in their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He likes your smile, and your singing, even if it’s not great he’s jokingly offered to turn you into a muse but he’s not actually joking and that worries you lmao

Comfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He sings to you, usually pours a bit of his own powers to make the song ease you and help you sleep, the next morning he usually welcomes you into a whole day of self-care with your favourite meals and facemasks while binge-watching your fave shows/movies

Dreams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

If you don’t want to live forever as his godly partner, he probably will turn you into either a beautiful melody or a constellation. If your time will be limited by mortal boundaries he’ll make sure to give you the most beautiful experiences and gifts anyone could ever ask for.

Equal - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s a wonderful simp. Very passive and would live happy the rest of his life if he could just stare at you for the rest of his existence, you make all the decisions and he really doesn’t mind one bit

Fight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He whines a lot when he’s tired or hungry, but really apart from that he just??? is never angry??? When you’re angry he gives you space and lets you do what you have to do to feel better but you guys never have big fights

Gratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

I think that we can all agree that after the hell he went through Lester is one of the most grateful boys out there, he’s just so so happy you chose him to spent your WHOLE life with him. Him. You want to live the only life you got with him? That’s amazing.

Honesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

He’s open even about the things you really don’t want to know lmao like the partners he used to have to the weird shit he used to do as a godly teenager. If you think normal teens are weird imagine one with mighty power.

Inspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

He’s afraid to forget what he’s learnt as a human, you make sure to keep him humble, he’s helped you to learn to love yourself, every little flaw is a spark of singularity now, he makes you feel unique.

Jealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

He’s the kind of guy to crush on the same people you have crushes on lol I wouldn’t say he’s jealous once you guys are together, he’s more the type to be like ‘Oh gods, did you see that? They smiled at you– Love you should ask them out. What? I know we’re together but c’mon you can’t just say no to that??’ He’s aware that you’re cute and that he can’t stop others from noticing. 

Kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

The first kiss was all shy and sweet but don’t worry, he definitely got better at it with time

Love Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Probably blurted it out while you were training and he just couldn’t help himself. He falls in love to easily, the poor idiot

Memory - What’s their favourite memory together?

When you compliment him with that bright smile of yours, whenever you two dance around late at night and you look at him like he’s your entire world he MELTS

Nicknames - What do they call their s/o?

Very classy and old-fashioned names. He can’t help it, he’s been alive for too long and ‘babe’ simply doesn’t cut it for him. Only the best types of nicknames for you. 

On Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

A lovesick fool just like Leo, but he’s more devoted to you that he is to his own duties, will try to spend every waking minute of his life serving you. Others wish they were dating a god if only just to be treated the way Lester treats you.

PDA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

He’s a very touchy boy, hardly ever stops himself before kissing you in front of others, it may be awkward for your friends but honestly who cares, enjoy those smooches honey.

Quirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Maybe the fact that he’s a literal god lmao

Romance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

VERY CLICHE BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN IT ISN’T GREAT. He’s cheesy and melts at your feet and will elope with you no questions asked if that’s what you wish to do.

Support - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

If you want the moon he’ll make sure you get it. If you want to go to college he’ll support you and pay your tuition if you want, actually what’s harder is to convince him that you don’t him to help you all the time

Thrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

He likes the easy routines, the mortal lifestyle is comforting. However, if you ever make the mistake to say ‘Man I wish i could see Area 51 from the inside, like, I just need to SEE’ in front of him... yeah, that was an interesting wednesday

Understanding - How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

He always knows exactly what you need when you need it. Empathetic is saying too little. 

Value - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

He’s lost so many partners already that treasures every minute he gets with you, you’re worth every little irky bad thing that could ever happen. He protects you like it’s his duty.

Wild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Lester learned to cook the ‘mortal way’ just so he could give you a nice birthday surprise. It went terribly but at least he took you to your favourite restaurant afterwards.

XOXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Again, very touchy fella.

Yearning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

When he’s got to attend some Olympus business or when you have to go on a quest, he’s always worry about you, he hates that this is the life you’re destined to have, but the love you have for each other makes up for it.

Zeal - are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

He’s a god, he’s an extra little shit of course he’s willing to sacrifice everything.

______________________

Taglist:   @beneaththeiceandsnow,  @bandshirts-andbooks

[vagrantblvrd]

The stupidly over-complicated AU where everyone lives but things still go to hell.

Anakin and Padme have to  hide Luke and Leia to prevent Palpatine from getting his hands on them. Because you know he’d love to use them against Anakin and Padme and/or make them his apprentices.

(Something, something, something turn the to the Dark Side to throw against Anakin and the others? But when Palpatine deems them ready he has them fight to the death because there can only be two sith nonsense.

Something he makes sure they’re very much aware of during their training and so are meant to consider the other an Enemy.

But you know, they totally Scheme Together against Palpatine because oh, hey, there are two of them. How strange.)

ANYWAY.

Things go wrong early on in that whoever they send Luke with gets intercepted along the way - Rex, perhaps - and they have to do the cool evasive maneuvers and whatnot and end up crashing on Mandalore or nearby covert/group of Mandalorians.

And due to Plot Reasons it’s not safe to try and leave wherever they ended up because everyone is looking for Anakin Skywalker’s son and the rebel traiter clone commander who absconded with him, and anyway Plot Reasons.

So Rex is like, when in Mandalore or whatever and he and Luke hide out with the Mandalorians.

Perhaps Rex fulfills the Resol’nare, perhaps not, but Luke is considered his foundling and um, Plot Reasons???

MEANWHILE.

Obi-Wan is entrusted with Leia, and idk, goes to Alderaan where Bail and Breha raise her as their daughter? But also Obi-Wan training her in ~sekrit to become a Jedi.

It’s interesting times, because complicated? Definitely yes.

She knows Bail and Breha aren’t her biological parents even though they love her like she is, knows her real parents are important figures in the Rebel Alliance and such.

When she was younger she remembers this couple, sad, kind, all the things she remembers of her mother from the movies and whatnot.

And when she’s older Obi-Wan’s former padawan brings intel and whatnot from the Rebellion and she’s this close to realizing Anakin is her father for the longest time because Plot Reasons, you know?

Sometimes Padme is with Anakin, sometimes it’s Cody and everyone is like “We have...Things to do. Over there,” and leave the two of them alone because love in wartime and Drama and Angst I cannot not do, and anyway.

Something happens with Mandalore - Imperial shenanigans is the best way to put it and they send Cody undercover to investigate?

(Because clone and even now there are others like him fleeing to Mandalore or whatever because there’s a new Mand’alor, and anyway.)

He gets there and discovers the Mand’alor’s husband and son are missing and Imperials are suspected to be behind it, and also? Rex is there and the Mand’alor’s husband and son are Force-sensitives and perhaps someone who’s an actual Jedi would like to look into things as well????

So off Obi-Wan and Leia go to find Din who is >:((((((((((( because his idiot husband and tiny green gremlin kid and of course they’d get caught up in this nonsense.

Anyway.

Adventures and shenanigans in which Leia realizes the Mand’alor’s husband is her damn brother - her twin - and her biological parentage and also there’s this scruffy smuggler in there somehow?

But also.

Rex telling them that Luke learned to use his powers through old journals that belonged to a certain Jedi master and also little quests about in which Din met Ahsoka and was like, pls help my idiot husband, and she keeps meaning to tell Anakin and such?

But intergalactic war and people trying to kill her and she’s been real busy, okay?

Also Luke teaching Grogu and Din is like So Tired.

Also, also?

Imperials trying to being Luke who is mostly feral these days and also raised as a Mandalorian with Jedi sorcery and rad Mandalorian armor, so, you know.

It doesn’t go well for the Imperials who caught him and Grogu.

Everyone catches up to them on some Imperial base where Luke and Grogu meet them halfway, right?

Luke and Leia running into one another first and she’s like, “Hey, so, we’re here to rescue you?” because clearly her brother, her twin, didn’t need the save, but hey, whatever.

And then, like. Idk, shenanigans in which Satine is one of Din’s advisors Bo-Katan is another and there’s a reason he hates council meetings so much?

But also the Armorer and to his everlasting regret/gratitude Paz, and anyway.

Yes

Shenanigans and such, and Luke losing his hand - against Palpatine or to save his father or something suitably dramatic and then beskar hand because I love it so much and just.

Eventual ousting of Palpatine and the Empire and happily ever afters.

But also, also, emotional everything with all that Anakin and Padme did to protect their kids that went so horribly wrong (but also not) and anger and issue and whatnot and Leia being a Jedi?

But like.

Angry about it.

Because the Jedi Order and their doctrines and whatnot and look at her idiot brother over there with all his attachments and yes he turned out to be an idiot? But didn’t fall to the Dark Side and what she’s saying is maybe the Jedi Order needs to take a long hard look itself, you know?

Obi-Wan and Cody get to be in one place for longer than a week and it’s glorious, okay? Glorious.

Anakin accompanies Padme to when she heads to Mandalore once the war’s over to discuss them joining the New Republic in which there is much doting on a tiny green gremlin kid.

Also awkward family bonding moments with Anakin, Padme, and Luke, and also Leia is there because Jedi reasons?

Cannot decide if Leia remaining a Jedi or Leia going into politics is most satisfying? Because Jedi!Leia would have so much to say about the way the Jedi Order approaches everything and with Obi-Wan’s training in both Jedi ways and negotiations and everything she learned from the Organas as well as what Padme shares with her? Few can match her, y’know?

(Also, though. Think of Din and Luke sparring with the armor and Jedi sorcery and whatnot and idiot husbands and Grogu is always scandalized when a pin ends with a smooch or keldabe kiss depending on whether or not helmets are involved because he is a child, sirs!!1!)

Idk, it’s late and my thoughts are all over the place, but yes???

[takaraphoenix]

Hey, I’m already warning that it’s Angst! So, what would Nico, or even most of Camps and Percy’s family and friends do if Percy die? This after the Giant War and he dies in a quest. What would they do?

I know this is a weird question but I need to know! I’m writing a story about this. But I wanted to know your opinion since your PJO stories inspire me to write!

Well, first of all, I'm very flattered that I spird you to write and I wish you good luck with your writing! <3

Then mh. Generally, I try to avoid death fics, both in reading and writing.

But in this fandom you can find great ways to work around it. So the real question is, where do you want to go with it?

Percy who dies, but due to his heroics in the past earned himself godhood and now his family and friends have to cope with the fact that he is dead and a god.

Percy who dies, but Nico says "fuck this shit", storms the underworld, grabs ghost!Percy's hand and does the second jail break because let's be real Thanatos owes Percy one for saving his life so he'd turn a blind eye and Hades doesn't even dare to speak up because Nico's been annoying him about Percy Jackson's pretty eyes for years now and if he doesn't allow Nico to steal the soul back, he will never hear the end of it.

Percy who dies and just... hangs out in the underworld. It's chill, honestly, he finally gets to bond with Nico who lives down there and they get together that way (I think I literally wrote that fic before. Or a Hades/Persephone/Percy fic. Or both. Unsure).

Percy who dies and becomes a ghost. New Rome is full of ghosts in canon, isn't it? Percy could just decide to hang out with his friends. Still painful, but they adjust to it.

Percy who dies and gets reborn and like 15 years from now, his friends get to meet him again, in a new body and have to cope with that.

Percy who dies and is just... gone.

Sooo, before you can really work on "What would they do?", you have to pick what you do. Where do you want Percy's death to go, because depending on the route taken, the reactions would vary.

Obviously, everyone grieves in their own way. So keep in mind how the characters act in canon. (Which, quite frankly, in the case of Nico really only leaves the "fuck this shit" Orpheus and Eurydice version, considering he tried to bring back Bianca for years and successfully revived Hazel.)

And "What would they do?" also depends on what you want them to do. Because if you stick with canon, most of them would just be sad for a bit and then move on, if canon's anything to go by. Annabeth in HoO never even mentions Luke or her grief for her first big crush slash mentor who had died just a few short months before. I refuse to touch ToA but from what I gather no one attempted to bring back Leo and they were all just kinda sad until he returned on his own. Jason's dead too now and I don't think anyone tried to bring him back either and Piper's already smooching her new love interest from what I've heard. And "camp" as a large entity wouldn't do much; all of them have lost so many siblings in the war and they moved on from it. They'd burn a shrout for Percy and move on from it, though he is our protagonist, in the general picture of a war riddled society with child soldiers who have lost dozens of siblings in the past few short years already, his death is not that much more significant than any of the others.

You can go with the route closest to what is considered "in character" by orienting yourself on the way these characters have been shown in canon to react to character deaths.

Personally, I think Riordan was a coward who vastly downplayed the PTSD, survivor's guilt and grief these characters should have been going through by the time HoO rolled around and I think that you should make the judgment call yourself. You've read the books, you have a feel for how they acted, how they felt, how they reacted. What do you think would be their appropriate reaction?

Sure, you could give me a list of characters you want involved in this and the scenario you want to go with and I can directly answer the question you asked and tell you how I think they'd react. And that can be a good guideline if you are unsure yourself. But at the end of the day, this is your story and it must feel like yours. You have to be the one who, when reading it, is satisfied by the reactions and behind how they acted. And that can easily be derailed by looking to others for guidance. That's not meant to be me declining your answer; if you do want to know what I think specific characters' reactions would be like in a specific scenario, then come back to me with that and I'll offer you my opinion.

It's more meant to be encouragement for you to look into yourself and test your own grasp on the characters and go with whatever reactions you think would be most satisfying; they don't necessarily have to be the most in character. Not just because sometimes, as above mentioned, "in character" can be dissatisfying and deliberately play down emotions a real person would be feeling in certain scenarios (often due to the author's own lack of knowledge about the specific scenario, deliberate ignorance or ratings; it's tough to sell a kids' book series if you genuinely confront the trauma that comes with the reality of being a child soldier), but also because sometimes, being more "out of character" is just... more fun, sometimes things are thought experiments, sometimes you want the extreme reaction because it makes for a better or more entertaining read.

Since this turned, uh, longer than anticipated, to sum it up shortly: Decide what Percy's death is supposed to mean in the larger context of the story and where you want to go with it, then decide which specific characters' reactions you're looking for. In some cases, you can easily compare to how they have reacted to a similar scenario in the past and then see for yourself if you want to stay in line with that reaction, or if you feel like a different reaction would be more appropriate, or just more fun to write/read.

You read the books and, I assume, enough fanfiction to know the characters and find your answer yourself, even if you're unsure about it right now. And if you do want more detailed input, you are free to come back to me with specifics, or message me in private and we can talk certain scenarios or particular characters you're struggling with through and I'll see if I can help you. ;)

[hiccanna-tidbits]

*kicking at your door, smashing it* DING DONG

Hello! 🥰🌸

from "Questions You Should Be Able To Answer For Any OTP" 1,3,4,5,9 and 10 for moanida!😅💜 But you can answer all of them or only few of them is it's too much ahaha

Ily, take care!!

YEAH BOIIII

Coffee shop AU: Who is the barista, and who frequents the coffee shop?

I'm just imagining Moana being a barista at some hole-in-the-wall authentic Polynesian coffee place by the beach, and of course Merida because she damn well needs her caffeine in the morning or she'll pass out, and Rapunzel insists on starting these fucking Squad Beach Days early. Merida was honestly willing to take the first cup of coffee she could get when the gang first went into town, but uhhhhhh oh GOD that girl behind the counter is cute!!! Merida starts "ending up" in there quite a lot, although initially she can barely string a coherent sentence together in front of that cute barista and can't make eye contact for more than half a second. Extroverted as she can be, Merida dissolves into an absolute mess as soon as a pretty girl is involved XD

Merida also pretends to only like black coffee to make herself seem tough, but in reality she kind of hates it and prefers sugar-laden lattes and sweet teas. After a while, when she and Mo have established kind of a friendship, and Merida can have an conversation with Mo without imploding and making an idiot of herself, Mo notices Mer making a face every time she sips her Plain Black Coffee and kinda smirks and is like “You know, there’s no shame in adding sweeteners. I mean, for god’s sake, my favorite drink here is the blonde vanilla coconut latte, and I’m still pretty tough.” Merida is just like “OH THANK GOD” and finally admits that she’d much rather be ordering an Irish crème, toffee, buttered rum, cinnamon, or caramel latte. If the seasonal flavor selection offers any apple-accented or apple pie-esque lattes, Merida’s all about that shit, too! Probably the most “intense” drink Merida actually enjoys is a pretty spicy cinnamon latte. She ends up ordering this pretty frequently to impress Moana with her spice tolerance, even though she really doesn’t need to.

Also, in case there’s any question about it--yes, Moana absolutely memorizes Merida’s orders! Moana also memorizes what flavor syrups Merida seems to like best (i.e. spicy cinnamon, apple pie, caramel, toffee, butterscotch) and gives them extra shots of them in her drinks. When the manager complains about all of Merida’s favorite flavor syrups running out frequently, Moana is like “Oh nooooo, I have no idea why THAT could be! That’s terrible!”

Rivals to lovers AU: Who takes their rivalry seriously, and who is half in it just to push the other’s buttons?

I love the idea of them having a super-petty sports rivalry in a modern AU! Merida strikes me as being competitive as hell, so I’m betting anything she’d be the one to take it way too seriously and get increasingly annoyed with Moana outdoing her, while Mo kind of gives in and indulges Mer but is also secretly amused and kind of flattered that Mer is like...that into their rivalry. Moana’s just like *Regina George voice* “Why are you so OBSESSED with me???”

Like maybe in a modern-day college AU, Merida has been the star of her college’s archery team basically since freshman year. She wins the championships!!! She gets the trophies!!! She’s very well-known within the tiny niche community that is college archery!!! Then, come junior year, this girl in Merida’s year who Merida’s never even SEEN before shows up out of nowhere and makes the cut for the team. She’s honestly way better than she has any right to be (like judging by how she is with that harpoon gun, Moana’s aim is pretty damn good) and is constantly stealing the spotlight, and Merida is a very angry lass. Like it seems like no matter what she does, Moana can always one-up her, and Merida wants to tear her hair out in frustration. Doesn’t help that every time Moana does ridiculously good on a drill and gets 7 bullseyes in a row or some shit, she’s insufferably smug and cocky about it. Merida very-nearly throws a fit every time Mo outdoes her, and Moana honestly finds the whole thing pretty amusing. She’s sort of flattered that apparently only she can get such dramatic reactions out of Mer, and that just tempts her to push Mer’s buttons all the more.

Then, come the annual Big Archery Tournament Finals! As usual, Merida’s college’s team wins--although this time, it’s through a combination of Merida’s and Moana’s skills rather than just Merida kicking archery ass for like 2 hours straight. On the individual evaluations, Moana scores higher than Merida, but only by a little bit. Merida is, of course, extremely salty, but she’s also grudgingly grateful that Moana being there was able to give their team a definitive edge in the competition.

Afterwards, the team goes out for celebratory drinks. After probably 3 drinks too many, Moana finally works up the courage to try and actually like...have a straight conversation with Merida for once, instead of just communicating with passive-aggressive show-offery. She wanders over, sits next to Mer at the bar, and half-slurredly asks if she can declare a truce just for one night, in honor of their kind-of-teamwork winning the tournament. Merida is also a few drinks in, so she’s just like “sure, fuck it, maybe yer not so bad after all. Now prove to me you’re not a pain in the arse!”

They chat for a while, and it turns out Moana is actually pretty easygoing and fun to talk to when she’s not mega-flexing with her archery skills. After a few more drinks, Moana is like “...can I tell you something?” and Merida’s like “why not?”

And then Moana just goes bright red and looks away and admits that the whole reason she got into archery and boosted up her skills enough to join the team in the first place was because she saw Merida making like 50 bullseyes at the previous year’s tournament, and developed a huge crush on her--to the point where she did all this extra-ass shit just so she could join the archery team and get to know Merida better. Also, every instance of Moana acting smug and cocky after acing a drill or perfectly hitting a target? It was honestly because she was trying to impress and show off to Merida, and also because she’s awkward as hell and has no idea how to actually flirt without being joke-mean and joke-cocky. Merida, a much more emotional drunk than she will ever admit, starts crying and gets super apologetic, because oh god, she was being so mean and rude to this girl who only ever thought she was cool and wanted to impress her from the jump??? How COULD she??? Moana lowkey loses her shit laughing because how mad Merida got at being upstaged was honestly kind of hilarious, and she was actually really flattered that Merida was, again, that obsessed with their rivalry. It made Moana feel weirdly special that only she could get to Merida that much, and she honestly liked the attention, even if it...wasn’t the most positive XD And Merida starts laughing, too, because she’ll admit that in hindsight, this whole thing feels a little ridiculous, and extracurricular college archery really isn’t that big of a deal.

Finally, Merida just rolls her eyes and says “C’mere, yeh bloody show-off yeh” and grabs Moana by the front of her archery uniform and smooches her!!! The entire archery team hoots and hollers because OH SHIT, DAT GAY!!! Merida holds out her other hand and flips the entire team off, which honestly just makes them cheer more.

Enemies to lovers AU: Which one switches sides?

Depends a lot on the conflict, I think! Maybe a war breaks out in an AU where someone other than Moana is chosen to return the Heart of Te Fiti--I’m gonna say Tui, for irony’s sake! Moana and Sina take over as co-chiefs while he’s gone, but he takes significantly longer than Moana did in the quest, so Moana’s tribe is eventually forced to flee Motunui to find new fishing grounds before their island is overtaken by darkness. The people of Motunui sail across the world, trying to find a new place to call home. Unfortunately, every time they find a habitable place, it’s already occupied, and the people who live there are uninterested in sharing their already-scarce food.

Eventually they stumble upon Dunbroch, far enough away from Motunui that the seas aren’t affected by the spreading darkness, and fish are plentiful. Naturally, Moana’s tribe sets up a camp on the shores and starts catching as many fish as they can, hoping they’ve finally found a place where they can have enough to eat again. Unfortunately Fergus and Elinor aren’t too crazy about this, and are like “yo, these oceans and these fish and other game belong to the people of Dunbroch and you gotta leave” and Sina and Moana are like “Pls we don’t have any place to go and we’ve been barely eating for a long-ass time, can’t you spare some food?” and Fergus and Elinor are like “sorry bro, it’s almost winter and we have our own entire kingdom to look after, we don’t need more mouths to feed. You gotta be on your way or shit’s gonna get real.”

So Moana thinks this sounds sketch as fuck because like...there’s an entire forest full of deer, rabbits, and other game, and they have NO food they can spare??? That night, Sina sends Moana to spy on the kingdom, since she can be pretty sneaky when she wants. Moana manages to climb the castle battlements and watch through a window, and she sees a bunch of people enjoying a massive feast in a huge dining hall. Her eyes are particularly drawn to a girl about her age with a head full of bright, fiery curls, wearing a nice dark green dress and gorging herself on pastries adorned with white icing and raspberries.

Moana heads back and tells Sina “actually it looks like these assholes have PLENTY of food to spare, and they just want to keep it all for themselves” and Sina is like “well shit...why don’t we raid their food store, then??? They’ve gotta have one somewhere!” And so the Motunui village storms Castle Dunbroch at dawn, catching them almost completely by surprise.

The first thing Moana does is seek out the redheaded pastry girl, whom she’s developed a particular disdain for. When she rushes her, she’s surprised that the ginger girl whips around and immediately sends an arrow sailing into her shoulder. When Moana gets close, the redheaded girl pulls out a sword. Moana takes out a long, sharpened wooden spear made from a particularly tough oar.

She turns out to be much more competent than Moana expected, especially for someone who was shamelessly shoving sweets into her mouth not 7 hours earlier.

They go toe to toe Raya-and-Namaari style, and the redheaded girl admittedly gives Moana a run for her money. The longer the battle goes on, the more Moana’s rage grows. She taunts the redheaded girl the entire time, calling her a spoiled, selfish brat who’d rather gorge herself with all the sugar in the world than share even one grain of it. Merida, who hasn’t exactly heard good things about these people from her parents, is just like “well, you’re no better, showing up and thinking you can just steal what belongs to Dunbroch and we won’t put up a fight!”

And thus the war begins. Motunui is never quite strong enough to get through the guards and raid the food stores, and Dunbroch is never quite strong enough to fully drive Motunui out of the kingdom. Fergus and Moana are both far too stubborn to surrender (despite the fact that Sina is kind of ready to), and so the battles continue. Casualties start to pile up. Dunbroch seeks help from the other clans, but they refuse--they did not take their leaders’ sons being scorned by the Dunbroch princess lightly.

Over and over, Moana can’t help but be drawn to the redheaded girl. She realizes after a few battles that this girl isn’t just anymore, but the Dunbroch princess--her resemblance to the king and his protectiveness over her can’t be a coincidence. It only makes Moana hate her more--but time and time again, she isn’t able to get the better of the princess. Moana can fight hard, and she can be vicious--but so, she’s discovering, can the Dunbroch girl. The princess is clever and cunning, and underestimating her has almost gotten Moana a blade in the throat one too many times.

Merida would be the one to change sides eventually, I think (wooo! Finally got to the actual question!). Once she finds out her parents didn’t tell her the whole truth about their first meeting with the Motunui village and sorta fudged what happened, Merida is livid that they turned away people who needed help. She said if she had known there were people who were tired and hungry and just needed a place to rest, she would have gladly given up some of her own meals for them! To prove this, she gathers up her dinner--plus some apples and some pastries she was going to have for dessert--and puts it in a basket, taking it to the Motunui camp as a peace offering. Moana ambushes her and very nearly slices the basket in half, if only because Moana was convinced it was filled with venemous snakes. After some bickering, Moana finally snatches the food away and, after testing it to make sure it wasn’t poisoned, brings it to Sina.

Unfortunately, one basket of food isn’t enough to feed the village, and the fighting continues. Merida tries to convince her parents to share their food stores with Motunui, but they still refuse, saying they need those stores for their own people and the Motunui people killed any chance of goodwill they might get when they attacked. Determined not to see people starve, Merida starts stealing from the reserve herself and sneaking the food out to the Motunui camp. Moana is feeling a lot more kindly towards Merida at this point, and feels a little bad about being so quick to judge her initially.

Eventually, Fergus and Elinor notice the food in the stores going missing, and figure some of the Motunui villagers must be running stealth operations to sneak in and get it. Dunbroch launches a full-scale attack on Montunui--while Merida is at their camp sneaking them food, in fact. Fergus makes a beeline for Moana. Word has gotten out by now of the times she managed to spy on the castle, so her sneakiness is well-known--and Fergus is all but certain she’s the thief. He charges at her with his sword, aimed to kill, when his own daughter steps in the way.

He barely manages to stop himself, but he does just in time. Merida admits she was stealing the food the whole time, and she can’t let Fergus hurt Moana. Fergus demands to know why, and Merida tearfully admits “Because I love her!”

Fergus, in a rage, takes out his sword again and charges Merida. Swords clash between father and daughter, and Merida looks like she’s just about to be overpowered. Moana can see the fear and betrayal in her eyes, appalled that her father would actually contemplate hurting her.

Not wanting to see whether he actually would, Moana steps in and helps Merida to fend Fergus off. “Enough!” she screams. “How can you live with yourself? My father risked his life to try to save his daughter and his people--and you’re willing to fight yours because she doesn’t agree with all this senseless violence?! You make me sick! I’m standing with Merida, because...because I love her too. I’ll leave if you want, but I want this to end.”

This finally snaps Fergus out of it, and he and Elinor decide that maybe the fighting has gone on long enough--and maybe it’s not worth it anymore, if it’s pitting them against their own daughter now. They end up trying to work out something with Motunui. Establishing a peace treaty and figuring out how to proceed forward is a long and messy process, but everyone is willing to put in the work--for the sake of Merida and Moana, if for nothing else.

Soulmate AU: Who is eager to meet their soulmate? Who absolutely does not want to meet their soulmate?

Neither of them want to meet their soulmate XD Merida has just been repulsed by the idea of marriage and commitment since she was young, mainly because she can’t not see it as just a means of taking her freedom away and making her be subservient to someone. Besides, given the, um...heteronormative culture of Dunbroch and all, she assumes she’ll get not just stuck with, but cosmically bound to a man and that idea just...doesn’t do anything but fill her with unadulterated disgust XD Like please no, she’s perfectly happy to go where she pleases when she pleases with no one but Angus for company. The last thing she needs is some stuck-up, snot-nosed boy telling her what she can and can’t do.

Moana has similar concerns, although maybe a bit less extreme. She’s mainly worried that when she meets her soulmate and, as per expectation, marries them, she’ll be expected to “mature” into a full adult and fully embrace her responsibilities as chief, leaving behind her childhood dreams of exploring the ocean. Same as Merida, she’s worried the person she’s destined for will tie her down and prevent her from exploring and going on the adventures she craves so badly. She’s also, like Merida, worried she’ll get stuck with some lame, boring dude who she’ll be destined for because...he loves her!!! And will be really nice to her!!! But will not stimulate or interest her in any way whatsoever!!! And Moana is pretty uninterested in romance and dating regardless, so the idea of any kind of romantic partner who she’d hypothetically have to run crazy ideas by before just doing them doesn’t sound too appealing to her. Like, she’s happy where she is and having her friends and family for company, what does she need an SO for??? It just feels like the whole “soulmate” business is just the universe attempting to give her a babysitter, and Moana ain’t about that. She can do things on her own, dammit!!! And what makes the great elder love gods think she wants another person to keep track of on her escapades, anyways?!? It’s enough effort keeping herself safe without worrying about someone else!

Imagine their shocked delight when each finds out their soulmate is a) a girl and b) a girl arguably just as chaotic, adventurous, and rebellious as they are!!! They meet and they’re like “huh...maybe the universe wasn’t being some big dumb fucking idiot binding us together after all. I can work with this!!!”

Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

Merida is the pirate! Or at least...the one who becomes a pirate first! XD Maybe to escape her betrothal she steals a ship and flees Dunbroch, and BOOM trouble on the High Seas time!!! Eventually she sails to the south Pacific on her naval escapades, and stumbles on Motunui. When she finds out Moana is a chief’s daughter, she naturally kidnaps her and holds her for ransom--because screw it, she hasn’t successfully pillaged any merchant ships recently and she needs some cash. But instead of being like “Noooo take me home!” Moana is like “Actually this fucks, I’ve always wanted to sail the ocean anyways and my dad wouldn’t let me before, so you’ve accidentally given me an avenue to achieve my dreams!!! Thank you!!!” And Merida realizes that a first mate would actually be a lot more useful in the long run than a handful of hostage money, so she just kind of shrugs like “aight, yer on the crew.”

Merida is a bit salty because Moana takes to the pirate lifestyle excellently--so much so that before long, she’s arguably a better pirate than Merida XD While Merida is a bit cranky about being outdone in the art of piracy, she also can’t help but admire Moana’s natural aptitude for sailing and propensity for mischief on the High Seas!!!

Their ship is called “The Arrow,” and Merida definitely uses her bow during pirate-to-pirate combat! She teaches Moana how to shoot a bow, but discovers Mo is pretty nifty with a harpoon gun as well!

Childhood best friends AU: Which one was super obviously in love with the other the whole time? Who was oblivious until they were older?

Oooooh, this is a fun one!!! Admittedly I don’t usually think about these girls in a��Childhood Friends to Lovers AU (very possibly due to...geographical constraints lol) so this’ll be a cool thought experiment!

SO in order to fix my unfortunate geographical constraints, I’m gonna say that this is an AU where the people of Motunui were wayfinders from the jump, and while voyaging (admittedly a LONG way), they stumbled upon Dunbroch. Moana’s parents and Merida’s parents immediately hit it off, and established a political alliance of sorts.

Moana, meanwhile, pulled the classic “little girl on vacation/at an event immediately seeks out other little girl and becomes best friends with her.” Moana and Merida naturally also hit it off immediately, and are both pretty bummed out when Tui and Sina want to leave and continue voyaging and such. However, they make plans to visit as frequently as they can and Merida and Moana are super hyped about this! They both always get extremely excited for said visits, and Little Moana nearly falls off the front of her family’s boat several times because she’s leaning over so far and squinting so hard to try and see Dunbroch.

I love the idea that Moana was the one who was totally smitten from the jump, to the point where it took her years to realize she was aspec because she was like “Of course I can fall in love!!! I’m in love with Merida!!!” She just didn’t realize most people have romantic inclinations toward more than one person over the course of their lives XD

It absolutely does not help that Merida is extremely romance-repulsed when they’re kids--mainly because she associates romance in general with being docile and acting stupid to impress some annoying macho guy, and that thought kinda makes her want to puke. That, and given how, er...heteronormative things are in Dunbroch, it doesn’t reall occur to her that romancing girls is like...an option. So poor Moana has always kind of resigned herself to thinking she has no chance with Merida, and keeps her feelings under pretty tight lock since she doesn’t want to ruin their close friendship and all and she doubts Merida even swings that way.

THEN when they’re in their early teens, Merida is like “hmmm...I wonder what it would be like to kiss Moana?” but then IMMEDIATELY feels weird for thinking that and tells absolutely no one. She’s definitely starting to feel something a little different than just platonic friendship though, and of course she’s also convinced Moana only sees her as a friend and probably doesn’t like girls.

Then one day they’re wrestling around out in the woods, like they have since they were little, and at one point Merida leans down and just impulsively kisses Moana. She’s super flustered and apologetic afterwards, but Moana just stares in shock before being like “holy shit, I never thought you’d actually want me too. Holy shit!!!!” After that, they start secret-dating and everyone around just thinks they’re still “very good friends” XD

When Merida turns 16 and gets the news of her betrothal, she’s devastated. It takes her several days to process her emotions, and several times she tries to protest to her mother, but Elinor steamrolls her and talks over her at every turn. Finally, when Merida can get a word in edgewise, she tearfully bursts out that she can’t go through with this because she loves Moana. Elinor, traditionally-minded woman that she is, is horrified by this.

When Fergus finds out, he GOES OFF at Elinor and sticks up for Merida. He basically says that she’s their daughter and they should want her to be happy, and they should be happy for her that she did find someone she loves, even if it’s a bit...unconventional.

Later, at the betrothal ceremony, Merida picks an archery contest for the suitors with the hopes of cheating the system and winning her own hand. Imagine her surprise when Moana rushes in late with a makeshift bow on her hip, shouting “I am Moana of Motunui, and I’ll be shooting for the princess’s hand as well!”

Luckily, due to Moana’s years and years of informal archery training from Merida herself, the other suitors really don’t stand a chance.

It turns out that Elinor and Fergus set this whole thing up, deciding in the end that their daughter should at least be able to marry who she loves if she had to get looped into a political marriage. And honestly, they weren’t going to say no to a stronger alliance with Motunui at the end of the day. Merida is so pleasantly shocked by the whole thing that she forgets to be mad about the fact that she’s still being pressured into a marriage pretty young XD Luckily, Moana has no intention of trying to hold Merida back or take her freedom away! Their relationship really barely changes after they officially become wives, and they’re still just as in love as they’ve basically always been.

As for the issue of heirs, Elinor and Fergus just make Merida’s brothers the heirs of Dunbroch, and Tui and Sina are fine with Moana and Merida choosing an heir for Motunui who isn’t necessarily their biological child. Neither Moana nor Merida are crazy about the “leaders have to be from the chief/monarch’s bloodline” rule anyways, so they’re more than fine with this!

This is in reference to this post! Still answering these questions for Moanida and Hiccanna, if I haven’t done so already!

@takaraphoenix come get your daily dose of Moanida!

[nazumichi]

WHAT HAPPENED IN TALES OF ARCADEIA DHKSBSO

OK SO SO SO SO

the tv series is so good, all of them are, so naturally I had very high hopes for the movie. Massive fucking mistake.

everything seemed to be going ok.

Spoilers under cut!

The gang was in Camelot after a big battle that resulted in Douxie (punk rock wizard guy) switching minds with narri (an all powerful nature spirit) so she couldn’t accidentally bring around the end of the world.

ok, cool, no issue there.

heres where things go weird. local badass alien princess aja appears in Camelot, and her boyfriend, regular jock Steve, gives her a big smooch. She freaks out. “If my counting is correct, that was our seventh kiss! In akiridion 5 (her home planet) that means there will be a baby!”and Steve is like “what the fuck. Wait you’re pregnant?? I’m gonna be a dad!!”

and then Krel, aja’s brother just appears in a burst of royal blue like “no. You’re pregnant.”

off to a great start! 

Hardly 20 minutes into the movie, there’s a mpreg arc. 

Great.

off to the second big bad moment. Not that it will be the last. 

Prior to this pregnancy scare, the main character, Jim, is going through a rough patch. Very much a “im not the trollhunter anymore. I’m not special, I’m just a regular kid.“ naturally, his mom and his changeling dad console him.

Then we learn they’re getting married and want Jim to be the best man. This isn’t a yikes moment, this is a “I’m going to cry this is everything I’ve ever wanted” moment.

spirits ever so slightly lifted, the gang splits up to take out the three powerful titans who want to wipe the entire planet clean, and start it anew.

awesome, cool.

we see Douxie, AARRRRGHHHH (massive super strong troll), and Nomura (haughty knife-wielding changeling), try to stop narri, who is under the control of her fellow evil elementals of fire and ice, from destroying brazil.

there’s a fight scene. Guess what happens. Guess.

Nomura fucking dies. She gets turned to stone and smashed into billions of tiny pieces by narri. Which is exactly how draal (her sort of troll boyfriend) died a couple episodes ago.

Don’t worry, this is fine, she definitely wasn’t my favourite character who’d changed so much in the span of 6 seasons, this is fine.

Ready for big yikes number 3?

Up in the cold wastelands of idk I wasn’t paying attention, a cold place, Jim and his parents are doing their best to stop the ice titans from destroying the super cold place that I can’t remember the name of.

Jim, in a rage of boyish anger, hefts a bomb like “i will blow up this ancient and extremely powerful god with a fucking hand grenade.”

And his dad, strickler, ever the voice of reason is like “no, silly! Use two hand grenades! Ugh fine, I’ll sacrifice myself to kill this thing. Take care of your mom for me, plus the THOUSANDS OF BABIES WE ADOPTED IN THE LAST SEASON, BTW. Toodles, young atlas!”

And then he fucking dies.

There’s some crying, from both the characters and myself.

So we usually have three changelings on set, strickler, Nomura, and notenrique, who is Claire’s adopted baby brother. Two have died. One has not made a single appearance. Go team!

Oh and guess what? The ice god didn’t even die. 👍

I’m not even gonna talk about the quest the alien siblings, Claire (Jim’s gf), Toby (Jim’s bestie), varvaatos (alien siblings guardian), Archie (cat-dragon who is Douxie’s bestie, and archies dad went on. That was a whole load of bull. But they did manage to secure a thing beginning with “k” that I forgot the name of. It can see into the past, future, and present elsewhere. Keep thing relic in mind, it will be useful later.

Remember Steve who’s pregnant? Yeah there’s a very graphic pregnancy scene. Like. Too graphic. His bestie/bf Eli helps him. And guess what the babies (there’s like 7) look like. Guess. They’re bio copies of Aja with Steve’s hair. I cannot make this shit up.

^ theres the happy mother.

Ok so there’s a big hero speech, all fine and dandy, Jim kills both the ice and fire gods, and realises that he is worth something, and his amulet didn’t make him a hero, really nice.

And then his bestie Toby sacrifices himself.

Toby dies. He dies. On screen.

I sobbed for a couple minutes, cursed mr del toro and all, I was an emotional wreck.

Now. Remember the time relic?

Every seen Madoka magica?

Jim uses it TO GO BACK IN TIME TO A BETTER UNIVERSE where he ISNT the trollhunter, TOBY, is, and if you’ve watched the series, you know that Trollhunters have a habit of befalling PAINFUL AND AGONISING DEATHS.

Jim doesn’t seen to perturbed by this, that it’s very likely that his bestie will die a very very painful death.

So the main cast never really meets. Yes, Jim and Toby continue to be friends. Jim gets closer to Claire. He introduces his changeling teacher strickler to his mom. We see a shot of douxie working in a regular store, which filled me with inhumane rage. We assume that the evil characters that got redeemed are still very evil.

We see no scenes of blinky and aarrgghhhh, none of the alien siblings. They’ve fucked off somewhere else.

I’m so FUCKING tired and so FUCKING disappointed. Goodnight.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales: New Gods On The Block! Review or THE INCREDIBLE STORKULES: COCKBLOCKER OUT OF MYTH!

We’re back, and i’m doing away with intros, for now, i’m trying to see if offering people a bit of the review makes them more receptive to reading it and now we’re nearing the end of this hellyear, and the trump presdency, i’m going into this one with a ton of energy, so let’s get quackin!

We open with the Scrooge and Kids on a quest to get a golden helmet he’s been after for years and has been one of his lifelong goals using a carefully crafted plan with all the kids skills needed. Okay i’ll admit that last part is unique to this show: given how interchangable the boys are outside of this continuity,  I assume he’d just throw them at the monster like Pikmin as a distraction while Donald grabbed the helmet and just grow new ones in his vast venture bro style clone mine if they happen to die. Thankfully there’s no Child Death but there is Child Failure as the team comes back sad and defeated and doubting themselves.. Della having a confetti cannon ready to celebrate dosen’t help. Though it does bring me to the subject of Della being out of focus this season. It’s a mixed bag for me: On the one hand I do get it, as she was the main focus of last season, even more than Louie, and now we’ve gotten to know her, she can sit back and play more of a supporting role, especially since Donald , who himself was more of a supporting character the past two seasons, is now getting more screentime and Beakly’s getting fleshed out more. Their trying to balance a rather massive cast, so it’s natural the one whose already got a ton of focus at this point would take a back seat and all around the show’s done a far better job giving everyone screentime this season. Launchpad has been lacking of late but given a Darkwing Duck spinoff is probably in the cards, and he’s had tons of episodes at this point compared to Donald and Beakly, i’m understanding of it. 

On the other.. there’s still a lot of stories to tell with her: We still haven’t had her deal with Scrooge basically erasing her for a decade at all nor Donald hiding her past from the kids.. he had reason and all, but he still made their mother a stranger to them. They had no stories, nothing to really go on for 10 years. That’s gotta have impacted both the kids and gotta hit della hard at some point that her father-uncle and brother both just kinda.. erased her to the kids. Plus we don’t know how she’s been adjusting to have a life OUTSIDE the kids especially since she’s been sitting out so many adventures, likely to let Scrooge have time with them and be a good daughter and mother and what not, but still there’s a LOT of ground to cover they simply haven’t yet. The Donald and Della plot we did get, while glorious, didn’t really add anything to either’s likely strained relationship and it’d be nice to give the two a subplot to work this out. Granted this might all be coming in the Castle McDuck Episode for all I know, but I can’t pin all my hopes and dreams on that one. And this all COULD’VE easily happened off screen.. but it’s something the audience really wants and needs. I’m not sure if we’re getting it and that worries me. But again theirs a large chunk of the season to answer this if this is the last one, and another season possible if it’s not, so i’m willing to wait for it. I’m just getting impatient is all. 

That being said this episode makes up for the Della Deficet as she’s one of the main driving forces of this side of the episode. I’ll get into that more in a second but Della’s been on the rare misfire adventure and knows Scrooge’s stages of grief and that he’ll come out of it with a better plan. Unfortunately for the kids that plan dosen’t include them and Scrooge runs off to assemble a better team leaving the kids utterly devastated. One of the other main driving forces besides depressed children and the greek gods is scrooge being really bad with people, but i’ll get to that. 

Point is the kids understandable emotional devastation and Della trying to mom for all of them at once because Launchpad had to get to his other job and is taking Beakly this weak to teach him and Drake how to raise a child, is interrupted by said Zeus ASSHAT RAPIST OUT OF MYTH! Along with Storkules COCKBLOCKER OUT OF MYTH and Selene, DELLA’S FIRST TIME WITH A WOMAN OUT OF MYTH!  There here because Zeus has lost his powers, as the Gods all collectively decided he was a dick and voted him out of office.. er stripped him of his powers. Sorry an asshole, narcacistic, sociopathic racist getting removed from his position of power happening a few days after the election was called.. the timing just could not have been better. But yeah Zeus is out, roll credits. Join me after them and after the cut for the rest of the review. 

So yeah the Gods are fed up with him, and Selene and Storkules are there to pick a worthy inheritor to his Laurel Wreath, his lighting bolts, and his collection of playboys he keeps alphabatized in his mancave.. also his mancave will also go to the winner. Storkules however, having a one track mind, notices Donald isn’t there and goes to find him. The kids are all eager to try but Selene is there for Della, which they all agree makes sense: I mean she has the disposition and sexual appitite of a green god but without all the rampant sex crimes and murder, and given most of them have clearly copped to the times except Zeus, that’s a plus. Plus she and Selene have already been together before so the fact they can smooch into infinity along with all the fun stuff is a nice bonus. It’s not like Storkules isn’t selecting his candiate soley with his 13 inch penis, so ther’es a precident. But Della, seeing the kids clearly need this more than she does, convinces her once and future girlfriend to let them try out. I really do wish we got more of the two this episode but what we get is great, and Selene reluctantly agrees after Della makes the valid point their STILL more mature than her dad. The fact Zeus punctuates this by getting into a “No you” contest with an 11-12 year old probably helped.  As for where Donald is he’s preparing for a date with Daisy! Horay. I’ve been waiting for Daisy to come back since the last time she was here, and Donald has naturally been considerate: Setting up a bunch of hearts, flowers, some punch that is likely just box wine and sprite, he has a budget and throwing all his garbage in the pool with bricks because he’s still Donald. Romantic, a good dad.. but still a disaster of a person who dosen’t know quite how to live like an adult... which naturally I immensely relate to and hope i’m lucky enough one day to have a lady or fella to hide all my garbage from. I mean i’m probably dying alone, but that’s likely my old buddy crippling depression talking. Oh you old scamp.. please fuck off an die.  But enough chilling looks into my psyche, point is Storkules barges in to ruin it, and eat his carefully made grilled cheese. As though Storkules may be incredible he’s also STORKULES, GOD OF NOT REALLY READING THE ROOM. Daisy comes in, and we find out it’s their second date.. and i’m assuming their first wasn’t that time they ended up in a direct to video sequel to Die Hard that’s still far better than Die Hard 5.. then again a colonoscopy is preferable to that movie so I Dunno. But she’s nice, friendly, if put off by the big sweaty man suddenly in their date. Storkules COCKBLOCKER OUT OF MYTH, does not help matters by, upon hearing that seeing how in love they are, and finding out it’s the second date assumes their getting married and hugs them in THE SWEATY ABS OF STORKULES. Do me next. 

Back at the God Tests, god I love a job-ish thing that lets me say that, Louie is up first, and being Louie has thought up a plan that benifets him wether he wins or looses but one that has serious underlying issues he hasn’t thought of. Naturally it turns out to be a gold touch which, as with Midas, works out about as well as you’d expect.. with Dog Murder and mass murder to follow. Selene undoes it, So Louie gets nothing. And yeah this has been a major issue this season that while I talked about it back in “Let’s Get Dangerous” bares repeating:  Louie feels like he learned NOTHING from the events of last season. He still likes, he still dosen’t think plans through, and he still cheats. In contrast Dewey DID grow from his season.. it’s subtle, he’s still the same loveable trainwreck and pre-teen Hank Venture he’s always been, but he no longer hides secrets or family stuff and is more of a team player. Still an egotsitical one, but it’s there. But Louie.. hasn’t changed at all. He’s still conviving, still thinks only in short term.. it’s only once or twice like with the Impossibin the events of last year really seem to have sunk in. It feels like the writer’s couldn’t figure out how to write a smarter Louie and just gave up. It’s really disheartning especially when most other character development, subtle and otherwise, sticks. 

While Huey sweats over his turn and Della tries to encourage, we cut back to the date which is going okay, Daisy’s trying to roll with it but Storkules, TERRIBLE WINGMAN OUT OF MYTH really isn’t good at talking Donald up or letting them get to know one another. While things breifly get better when Daisy brings up her career and Donald talks it up like the loving soon to be boyfriend he is, Storkules FUCKUP OUT OF MYTH screws things up by saying, when she explains to him she hasn’t made any Toga’s because she works primarily in dresses that she can “work up to them eventually. “ As proof this is the best Daisy she dosen’t dump Donald immidetly despite none of this being his fault and him trying to explain he didn’t invite him, but instead just makes an angry, and understandably so , face and goes to powder her beak.. which is clearly code for “Scream Obscenities into Donald’s Mirror for the next ten minutes”. Which if it already wasn’t abundantly clear they were perfect for each other this would be the clincher. Donald wants Storkules to go and TRIES to tell him, but Storkules just assumes he wants him to make a big romantic gesture for them and goes to “let Cupid’s Arrow” strike her. Donald understandably wants conformation he doesn’t mean that literally. Spoiler alert: He does. 

IT’s Huey’s turn next at playing god and he decides to be God of Intuition, gaining future sight so he can know everything and prevent tragedy. We instead get a damn funny scene where after adjusting to his powers he tries to prevent a breakup.. only to play both parts himself and cause it anyway. Just some great acting from Danny Pudi there. We get some more as Huey slowly melts down from the information, traumatizing a kid and nearly getting beat up with a guy who wants to “Beat up the freak for making everyone uncomfortable” which.. 

Yeah it’s not acceptable for what looks like a grown adult, or even a Teenager if that was an intent, to whale on a CHILD, let alone ANYONE for being “a Freak”. I mean yes Huey did screw up big, not mass murder bit but still.. but he’s still a fucking child. As someone who was prone to breakdowns at that age, and up to present day... I take this personally, especially since I see Huey as high functioning autsitic. So this hits home as i’ve had many people just tell me to get over it instead of trying to help. So yeah fuck this guy, take off that Gizmoduck shirt you do not deserve it. We fans do though, I hope that becomes real merch. 

But yeah Huey failed and Zeus is gloating..mostly because in his already considerably warped brain, he thinks that if they all fail he dosen’t get it. Selene explains basic logic to him: If they fail to find a new god here, they’ll just keep looking. Zeus naturally has a tantrum as Scrooge enters, wondering why the kids care about god powers and Della, being a supportive mom, tries to get him to encourage them. He instead focuses on his team. Again, we’ll get to him trust me. Selene also calls her dad out on the fact he hasn’t done anything good since defeating the titans centuries ago.  Naturally being THE GREATEST SHITHEAD IN ALL OF GREEK MYTHOLOGY Zeus takes the exact wrong lesson from this and calls his brother Hades to whip up a titan for him to fight because that was her point and not that your an irredemible dick tip who their desperate to replace and who was dethroned because no one liked you, not even your horrible presumibly now ex wife. I mean unlike DC Comics Zeus he’s not planning a cou but only because he has no powers. Hades however is well aware his brother has no powers, as the gods have been talking about it and laughing about it because Zeus sucks eggs. Also Hades has a great goth look and personality here as well as muscular arms to hold my bi ass at night. A-Plus character design. I may also have a thing for goths and emos I never realized I had. Just an observation. 

Back at the boat Donald and Daisy are enjoying drinks, which again has to be wine.. I mean again box wine, Donald needs a lot of booze after a hard days nearly getting murdered and Costco has great deals on it, but still booze. They cuddle a bit and it’s fucking adorable.. and Storkules WHO JUST KIDDNAPED HIS COUSIN CUPID AND STOLE HIS SHIT naturally ruins this moment by first trying to fire one date rape arrow at them, then takes donald’s rampant headshaking no as a sign to fire all of the arrows... with Daisy ending up in the water and unsettling the garbage. Granted Donald COULD’VE prevented this by explaning things to her.. but i’m betting he didn’t simply because he’s.. tired of this shit. He’s tired of adventure, tired of it intruding on his life and just hoped Storkules was gone and out of sight and didn’t have a chance to prepare for that till it was too late. NOW Daisy storms off.. but unlike say Cabs Daisy, whose a living nightmare, or Comic Daisy, whose not a great person but has her moments depending on the comic, she has VALID REASON. Donald lied to her about garbage and dind’t just take it out like a normal Duck, and didn’t just outright yell at his friend to leave on their date, a friend who just attacked her and already insulted her. IT’s understandable, especailly given a line coming up she’d WANT to leave and leave Donald behind.  Donald however is naturally miserable and it finally gets through Storkules thick skull he messed up and he runs off to cry while Donald miserably floats among the garbage and my heart both relates to that nad breaks seeing it. I mean .. Daisy meant a lot to him: After years of presumibly avoiding dating, or if he did not doing so for long, to focus on the boys, after a year of putting their needs ahead of his and living with his demanding uncle, of being dragged out of a normal if miserable life and into a less miersable but adventerous one he didn’t want, of being stranded in space and on an island wondering if his kids would be okay.. he finally not only has time for himself, and his sister back after years of thinking her dead and thus someone else to take care of the kids needs for a while without feeling any guilt over it or worrying about them, but found someone special. She’s talented, beautiful, charming, and understanding. And most importanlty she LISTENS to him and throughly likes Donald for who he is. And he looses that only PARTLY due to his won incomptence but mostly because someone he already barely allows in his life came in and ruined it. Once again the adventure and everything took something from him and while not nearly as big as loosing his sister, it still fucking hurts to once again have one small bit of something just for himself, one bit of normalcy, one person who loves him for who he is now through and through.. and it’s seemingly gone. It’s why I like this relationship even if this part panes me: Donald can FINALLY be happy... finally have someone who genuinely cares about him.  This also boils down Storkules character and why I don’t ship the two of them: He’s a good god, he’s brave, compasionate, carring, and generally wants the best for donald and does genuinely love him.. but he also dosen’t care really what DONALD wants half the time. He’s the embodiment of Donald’s biggest gripe with his life: No one listens to or repsects him or what he wants. Storkules wants Donald the adventurer, Donald the brave, Donald the undaunted, DONALD THE IDEALIZED VERSION THAT ONLY EXISTS IN HIS HEAD. He dosen’t really get Donald isn’t the same person, and even that person wasn’t into him. Not because he’s a man, like his sister Donald could easily be bi or pan.. but because he’s just SO MUCH and Donald’s family is already SO MUCH.. and that was BEFORE the kids and the launchpad. Donald has made peace with adventuring but it’s still clearly not his faviorite thing while for Storkules adventure and experince is his life. Storkules needs someone like him and Donald needs someone down to earth, someone who can HANDLE the amount of chaos that follows him and the famly, but someone whose .. normal. And Daisy is that. If you ship then fine fine, but I just don’t because they just don’t go together and both deserve a partner they can truly be a partner with, not someone they clearly don’t understand or someone they DREAD visiting. They both deserve better than that. 

Back on the god plot, it’s Webby’s turn as she becomes Goddess of Friendship. And helps the mood at the pier by spreading sunshine.. and then deals with the pier’s greatest menace and my honorary uncle, because he’s really not much worse than some of my actual uncles...

GLOMGOLD, SCOURGE OF CHILDREN’S KIDDIE RIDES. Because of course a seemingly regular habit for Glomgold is hogging a children’s ride he somehow fits into. Of course it is. It’s cheap and he’s not the best human being but I love him anyway. Webby heats it up to scare him then tries to get the kids to hug before having a breakdown at everyone not being happy. This does fit with her personality.. I didn’t think so at first but thinking back her first response in any friendship crisis is to panic and overreact. Her reaction to her best friend telling her she may have to stop sleeping over with her and her sister/webby’s giflriend because of magic danger is an implied death threat. She’s getting BETTER with people, but she still dosen’t have the life experince to fully deal with it and naturally upon seeing things get worse and worse goes on a lighting filled rampage Selene thankfully stops and likely undoes. Though Glomgold is likely on the moon now. He’ll be fine. 

Dewey is last and auditions.. but forgets the god part and fails which fits him perfectly and is a great bit. The kids have all washed out and are depressed about it. While Della is hopeful when talking to Selene, Selene gently explains to her girlfriend she shares with a space alien that the kids just aren’t ready and that maybe the power of a god just isn’t the thing you give to a kid for a self esteem boost. Della MEANS well here, she just wants her kids, Webby very much included, to feel good and get their self esteem back after Scrooge swallowed it whole. But Selene is right that this is just too much power, and given it nearly drove Huey insane  and nearly made Louie and Webby murderers, she has a point. It’s a good thought, but Selene needs an actual replacement for her dad. Sadly though this breaks the kids further after this and they slink off and Selene gets she messed up.. while she was right to reject them, she missed WHY Della was trying so hard. However credit where it’s do unlike her brother, while she dosen’t try to fix her issue, it’s likely out of emotional maturity: she knows just saying nice things to the kids wouldn’t help them or would wring hollow and their mom is better for that. IT’s things like this that are going to make her a good step mom.. yeah i’m shiping Della with both her girlfriends at once. Just because I gave up on her and Launchpad dosen’t mean poly’s off the table, and frankly selene is strong enough to win Penumbra’s favor and Penumbra has the kind of pepper and violence a greek goddess likes in her women. They’d be cute all together. I likes it. 

Less cute is ZEUS, SCHEMING BOWL OF ELEPHANT PISS OUT OF MYTH!, who realizes his greatest gift isn’t his powers: I’ts manipulating his children. 

And since he found a sad STORKULES POOR SAD BOY OUT OF MYTH. , and hears his issue, with Storkules hilarious sitting in his poppa’s lap, he spins it into getting what he wants: Saying since he and his wife, and Storkules mother in this version apparently I dunno, fell in love with battle, summoning Chronos will do just that for Donsy. Granted for most people your dad’s tale about how he met your step mom who tried killiing you a bunch and who he’s cheated on dozens of times would raise a red flag, but STORKULES IS THICK AS A BRICK.. in both senses of the word and calls forth Chronus. 

Daisy meanwhile is driving her car away, but is battling with herself. On one hand she doesn’t want to play mother to a guy who can’t dispose his trash or his weird friends. On the other she admits she can really be herself around Donald. We then get the most telling line though.. “You do not need to fall for another man who needs saving!”

That.. is clearly setup for the future. It MIGHT be Gladstone but it could be anyone. Hell it could be someone entirely new. She also could have a kid like we’ve all wanted. We could get a canon version of Juinor.. not named Donald Juinor because 1) He’s not donald’s son and 2) that name’s been forever tainted and we all know which living bottle of axe body spray to blame. I.. genuinely can’t wait to find out who this is and I expect we will before the season’s up and i’ts nice to see Tress, like last time, get to dig into some emotional complexity with the character instead of just yelling at Donald or talking about bows and stuff. Here she grapples with herself as she does love Donald but the past has burnt her a lot. But as a wise pansexual once said “ But I think it's important for us to remember that sometimes, sometimes it does work out. And even though everything inside us is telling us to protect ourselves, when you've got it, don't let it go. And I am telling you, that you have got it, if you want it. “ Love is hard, love is messy, maybe that among many other things is why i’m alone. But it’s worth it when you take the time.. and upon seeing a giant monster heading for Donald’s house, Daisy realizes he is worth it.. or that frustrated with him right now or not she dosen’t want him to die. Either way she’s a coming and i’m gathering hornets in a box in ancipation of finding out who hurt her so I can mail them to him. I popped an H on there so I know it has hornets. 

Back at the mansion the mood is bleak as heelllllllllll with Louie ordering pizza minus the toppings and Della’s attempt to give the kids hot choclate just getting an ow from Webby. It does make sense: Scrooge and adventuring are their lives.. if he dosen’t need them.. how would they ever do it themselves? Plus their 11 and 13 and at that age kids are very fragile so having their mentor and grandpa reject them like this really hurts, not helped by Scrooge proudly announcing his new team and trying to awkwardly bounce not getting this is his fault, though Della is staring at him with a look that just screams. 

But before Della can stab her Dunkle, we cut to a depressed donald who switches from one natural state, Depression, to another, fearing for his life, as Chronus arrives and Huey rightly wonders how he’s here. The kids all defer to Scrooge while Della continues to just be the best. Seriously for the entire episode her only throught is her kids, and their emotional well being and had this crisis not popped up she probably would’ve stabbed scrooge then yelled him out for hurting her babies. She’s graduated from trying to be a mom but having issues with it due to mentally still being in her 20′s, to genuinely being GREAT at the job. Good on her.  Daisy is naturally horrified to arrive to find Donald being eaten while Storkules is overjoyed. I WOULD say his stupidity’s overplayed this episode.. but he’s never displayed good judgement before why start now? It fits his character and his joy turns to distress when Chronus eats donald.. and has a cage in his tummy. with glass walls. I dunno, it’s a cool design. Daisy is understandably pissed and yells at it for eating her boyfriend, which gets an adorable oh boy oh boy from donald> Again love is rough, but one jackass screwing with you does not equate to every man or woman or person you date being a jackass. Daisy has realized this. Storkules is overjoyed, but soon finds himself and his sister fihgting Chronus and honestly both are damn impressive doing so. Seriously when the justice ducks form.. give htem a call. I mean She has moon beams and he’s a greek god.. plus Drake and Launchpad could use a third.. I mean he fits better there and Drake is already dating one manchild, and is one to a smaller extent, another won’t hurt. Just consider it shippers.. or foursies with Morgana because as this episode shows Storkules is bi as he is mighty. he’s Bighty. But the god squad fails, and gets eaten and Zeus’ time to shine predictably ends with an “I’ve failed immediately”, to no one’s suprise. 

Scrooge starts working on a plan as he and Della, naturally scale the colossus. We then get the scene that’s been boiling all episode: When Scrooge wonders where the kids are, Della calls him out pointing out they’ve been plauged with doubts about him replacing them.. because he literally was replacing them, and when Scrooge is earnestly suprised by that Della points out the obvious: Their children, as I said their fragile and as Della puts it, Scrooge puts a LOT of pressure on them, something she likely knows from experince.  And this is what i’ve been leading up to and putting a pin in all episode: Scrooge himself. It’s something I thought of days ago but this episode hammers in heavily: Scrooge really dosen’t have a ton of personal social skills. Sure he can work a board room pitch, lead a team of adventuerers, and run a vast empire while never forgetting the human element, for a lack of a better term, he’s not lacking in empathy or the ablility to talk to people, but when it comes to reading them it’s just surface level. He’s genuinely been show to struggle with empathy, with feeling someone elses emotions or realizing them till they’ve already been hurt. He spent a good ten years desperatley trying to bring Della back, avoding his pain and guilt instead of talking to Donald and making amends with him. His relationship with Goldie took decades to get anywhere healthy as he just put his walls up and assumed she’d never change when, as we’ve seen now, she always could she just needed a push. And when confronted by the kids he lashed out and then pushed them away instead of mending the wounds he created. Even on a much smaller level, when Lena and Violet ended up along next week he’s utterly lost when Adventure isn’t on the menu and only picks up from being baffled by two normal ish (One’s a parnaomal expert the other is the paranormal) joining him once it’s clear at least one of them fits right in with his intrests. He can deal with people on a problem by problem basis, but he’s just not good at dealing with their emotional needs or opening up.  It’s why this works so well: his oblviousness fits. To him and the way his brain works, the crown is just a problem to solve and he just needs diffrent tools to fix it, not realizing replacing the kids for a mission would bother them or they’d ever think they were replaceable. Until now I hadn’t seen much similarity to Huey but both.. are just not great with PEOPLE. They put them in boxes, try to solve problems that way.. it’s just their specific issues that way are diffrent. Scrooge can anticapte the unknown and how people he’s fighting act.. but can’t anticipate personal hurt and pain well because he bottles all his up. When checking off a problem.. i’ts just something he dosen’t consider and thus his biggest blindspot, the thing he has to overcome time and time again: How his family feels and how he can deal with it.  Here however he deals admirably.. now he KNOWS there’s a problem, and in a genuine show of character development over the past three seasons, he apologizes fully, saying their the best team he could ask for, better than zeus and don’t need his powers and they can get the helm together. Instead of putting up walls.. he’s letting his in and showing humility, which given Scrooge’s ego.. is a tall order. But for those kids, for his strength, it’s no small feet. Of course said speech gets Him and Della eaten, but the kids, now reinegized, ahve time to plan, with Daisy further stalling by roaring at Chronus to stop. Because she’s fucking awesome and Storkules finally gets that. The kids however take the leaves and breifly retake their powers, Dewey’s is for dance naturally, and use them together to take down Chronus, freeing everyone else, defeating the titan and throwing him back into the pits.  Donald and Daisy reunite and get a RELLY sweet moment, blushing and looking lovingly at one another, getting lava on each other, before kissing. STORKULES, DOSEN’T GET THEY DON’T WANT A THIRD PARTNER OF MYTH, of course interrupts and hugs them hostage for the remaider of the episode. I’m assuming Beakly , when she got home, pried htem out and explained them not wanting a third int heir relationship to him, and it’s a weak end to the plot as Storkules learned nothing and one of the weaker parts of this episode. The rest is stronger as the kids and Scrooge plan to make another run at the helmet and Selene wonders off to “use your shower” and then order pizza.. so she basically just asked Della out. And has used her shower before. 

I mean again, she can have two partners. This episode alone has earned that and they seem like they’d mesh. Penny would just have to learn some lessons about sharing and godly vagina’s is all. Nothing wrong with that. And what about Zeus.. no one asked but he gets his wreath back only to fall in the pit, with Hades naturally laughing his ass off.. and likely also taking Zeus’ laurel back. So Zeus is trapped in hell with a goth mocking him. HORAY! HAPPY END.  Final Thoughts; This was a pretty good one. It does have it’s weak spots: Storkules learned nothing, the kids stories endings were easy to see coming and there wasn’t enough Dellene. But really despite that. .it’s still a solid episode mostly because it’s REALLY damn funny. The comedic timing is just pitch perfect and while like most of the plots I could see the rhythm of the donsy plot, the reasons for it were all funny and fresh and the scene with Daisy in her car was a nice bit of character building/clear setup for the future. And showing off Della’s own character developement and history with scrooge, the latter without ever having to mention it, really brought the episode up, as did the guest cast’s game voice acting and timing. This episode is far from perfect, but it’s still a fun episode that felt needed despite not being tied into the main plot: Bringing back some old friends, and having an intresting story to tell. Plus we got more Donsy so there’s that. Overall while not the BEST episode of the series, it was a funny, enjoyable half hour of television and sometimes, that’s enough.  If you liked this review follow me or more, and if there’s an episode of Ducktales from seasons 1 or 2 you’d like me to cover, you can comission it for 5 bucks, 5 bucks an episode, 5 dollars off your order when you comission more than one, via my personal messages. You can also follow me on patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet if you want.  NEXT WEEK: FLASHBACK EPISODE! BABY DONALD AND DELLA! BRADFORD ORIGIN STORY! POSSIBLE HORTENSE AFTER SO LONG! MY BODY IS READY!

[vaguely-concerned]

The Mandalorian Chapter 11; the rewatch edition

I have found a bit more enthusiasm for this one on the rewatch, so here goes!

- din snapping ‘I’m trying my best here!’ in a vaguely annoyed tone as his entire ship is going up in flames around him because he mostly doesn’t get angry as much as sulky... the height of cinema 

- I love frog husband’s clothes, because they’re in a very similar style and colour scheme to frog lady’s but also incorporate the knitwear we see on the people of trask, so it both underlines his belonging with her and implies that he’s been on this moon for quite a while, they may have been apart for some time  

especially his scarf is a darling detail and there’s a bit of contrast in texture to it next to his wife’s, it’s nice. he’s wearing a similar kind of vest to what we see on the fishermen later, too 

- I think my favourite part of this entire episode (well second after din cradling the baby against him after nearly drowning) is just the design and Vibe of the planet and especially this harbour

for one I LOVE that it’s shown that even in the middle of the day it’s dark enough that the electric lights are still on when it’s overcast (it reminds me a bit of norway during the winter, actually, when dawn just never quite breaks and then slinks off in embarrassment before it’s even noon). and there’s also the... sails? nets? hanging around looking almost like flags, which are very Aesthetic but god knows what they’re for. maybe for drying fish on in the summer? 

I think the building in the distance behind frog husband’s back here is a lighthouse? or it could be one of those towers for loading you see when they scout out the empire ship too, I suppose!

and one for my strange obsession with Texture on this show: these fabric-covered crates!!! they look exactly as dingy and moldy as you’d expect them to be in this climate, I wonder what they’re for (& I vaguely want to touch them) 

- from the sound of it din’s vibroknife is uh ‘on’ when he pokes the squid thing, and he also goes for the tentacle the furthest away from the baby <3

proof the calamari flan have been scratched up a bit during all that time in din’s pockets! (the attention to detail in this show sometimes istg) 

- this is 100% me reading too much into things again, call the overthinking police I’ll do my time meekly lol, but the boat looks a little bit like the mudhorn signet from this angle: 

again din keeps his hand on or sooo close to his blaster in this entire scene, he knows this is sketch as all hell 

a) once again I want to praise the effects team for how GOOD the aliens look in this episode holy shit and b) the hell is this dude wearing on the straps of his overalls tho 

- the dude mando (axe woves) uses his little... wrist launcher thing to shoot with to finish two off the fishermen, so my theory that they can be loaded with other things than the whistling birds for slightly less effective use (maybe without the level of honing we’ve seen din’s be able to do?) is looking good!

- din actually has quite good form when diving into the water, I’m guessing he can swim at least tolerably when not in full armour, being stabbed at from all directions, having just had his son eaten by a sea monster and also being trapped in with said sea monster (I’m a strong swimmer and I can tell you that there’s a reason they make you swim with clothes on from time to time to see how hard it is, it sucks. with metal plates strapped all over you as well? yeah good luck) people don’t tend to hit the water that gracefully without some kind of training in my experience lol. might be some of the training with the jet pack has carried over too, considering he throws himself off that cliff in chapter 12 with similar confidence?

it’s interesting that they’re once again showing us a threat where the armour doesn’t help and even hinders him. we’re so used to the ways it can make him near-invincible, but it can also drag him down (literally, in this case. aha ha ha. well if I’m not here for my own entertainment then what am I here for honestly)

- din’s voice sounding like he’s just on the verge of crying as he cradles the baby (and the sound he makes as he realizes the baby’s alive) is my kryptonite, turns out. fucking breaks my heart into tiny pieces every time, I would die for this man and he wouldn’t let me

- in support of din’s paranoia: so far this season we haven’t been able to go five minutes without someone talking about peeling the precious beskar off a mandalorian corpse, I can see why his mind was primed to move in one particular way there

- I think the fabric of din’s cape has been treated with something that makes it waterproof; the water seems to pearl on top of it rather than soak in! can you imagine how heavy it would get if it did absorb water tho christ

(a bit hard to see at this size but that’s what it looked like to me close up anyway! could also be that it’s wool and that’s why it looks that way but I prefer an elaborate sci-fi explanation here, because it doesn’t look particularly weighed down afterwards) might also explain why he doesn’t seem worried about it catching on fire when he uses the jetpack haha, maybe this is something the mandos do with fabric they’re going to use for a long time 

I also enjoy part of the gambeson/undersuit thing poking up from under the shoulder pauldron and cape; I think this is about as disheveled as we’ve seen him since immediately post-mudhorn 

- the sound mixing in this scene, where din’s breathing is layered a bit over everything else so you almost feel like you’re in the helmet with him listening to what the others are saying........ oh my GOD, it embeds you so deeply in his POV but so subtly 

- not to be biased or anything... but din and the armorer’s armour design is so vastly superior to these guys it shouldn’t even be a competition lol 

din looks like an honest to god knight in shining armour except also sci-fi western and the armorer looks like a fucking war goddess from a time beyond memory; the clone wars mandos look like high end cosplayers (eh maybe it’s just my dislike for the boobplates that has me so 😒 lol. also a lot of dudes were very shitty about that whole thing and I don’t say anything but the ‘vaguely-concerned will remember this’ telltale message pops up in the corner every time) 

moment of saltiness over: I do like the differentiation between their individual character designs 

the differences in body type and helmet design is nice! they look like a unified team, but with individuality. I suspect the ladies have those belts and their armour plates on the hips instead of the front of the thighs to emphasize the ‘female’ silhouette, which. okay fine whatever

- bo katan looks very pointedly down at the baby after saying ‘a group of religious zealots who want to return to the ancient ways’ which makes me VERY nervous for reasons I can’t quite articulate

- the mournful guitar version of the mando theme as din watches the sunset...... hmmmmngh (this might be some Symbolism happening to us folks strap in for the identity crisis he still hasn’t processed) 

- I Cannot get over din being so unimpressed by and uninterested in bo katan’s ‘retake mandalore’ sales pitch from literally the first moment dfhasdkjfhsad sorry lady kryze this man just does not do main quest shit, he’s all side quests all the time and that’s why I love him  

- as someone who after chapter 8 wrote a whole-ass fic that was wholly & exclusively about din telling the baby he’ll always come back for him... some of the shit he’s been saying this season does feel like it’s been written to mercilessly victimize me, personally and specifically 

- guessing this structure in the background is the traffic control tower! doesn’t really matter, I just thought it was neat

- this part of the soundtrack is called ‘ship o hoj, mandalorians!’, which I found incredibly charming haha (it’s ‘ship ahoy’ except how you write it in swedish, good one herr göranson)  

- bo katan is vague about who exactly the new mand’alor would be if they took back mandalore to begin with, she doesn’t specify she is planning to be the ruler until she’s already got din on the ship and in no position to refuse to help. gotta respect the grift at least lol  

I do love her voice, though, it reminds me a bit of jennifer hale as shepard

- “I need to get back to my ship, with the foundling” your honor I uh love him so fucking much 

- frog lady stroking the baby’s back a bit as she holds her hand behind him to make sure he doesn’t fall backwards while playing with the tadpole ;___________;

and also frog husband and frog lady reaching out to hold hands and frog smooching as din and yodito leave ;____________________________________________;

- when din says the exasperated “mon calamari. unbelievable” line, the baby makes that little blowing a raspberry sound he does as if to agree ‘uh-huh unbelu -- unbelly -- unbelievable dad smh’ and it is very very adorable 

- there’s quite a bit of Stuff in the concept art that didn’t make it in this time around; I wonder if maybe they cut some stuff for pacing or whatever and that’s why this episode is so short? water leaking into the cockpit of the razor crest, something that looked a bit like whaling going on on the docks and more spaceships taking off (maybe there were originally meant to be some smaller ships defending the big empire one?), there’s quite a bit here  

[the-ipre]

Relistening to Balance and I remembered something absolutely buck wild; Barry and Lup aren’t officially married in cannon. There’s no mention of a wedding, a wedding ring, or anything. Griffin never says they’re NOT married, but still, crazy right???

all due respect to griffin (which is a lot!) but also. cowardice.

–––

Lup and Barry are in love, and that is almost a given state of the universes at this point. Before they put that into words properly, though, they pined for decades and they did fake being in a relationship more than once in the half a century before one actually happened. 

Two years after the Legato Conservatory, Lup offhandedly mentions getting married. For the tax benefits, of course, because this plane is something of a nightmare in that regard and it would be fun, and she knows that she is talking more quickly than usual because it stopped feeling like a joke almost before she opened her mouth.

She keeps her eyes trained down the barrel of her microscope, biting her lip in a futile attempt to hold back a tense grin as Barry audibly fumbles and drops something.

“Uh, never let it be said that I would say no to marrying you, because that would be. Uh. Good,” Barry says, and a knot of tension that shouldn’t have existed in the first place unravels in Lup’s chest. “But i also wouldn’t be opposed to getting married for reasons other than tax purposes.”

Lup looks up from her microscope and Barry is a more than a little bit flushed, but he smiles at her and she returns a grin in full force. “Barry J Bluejeans, are you suggesting a marriage for love? Whatever would our family say.” Lup draws out the words, scooting her rolling chair closer to Barry.

“Probably that it’s about time?” Barry says. “I think that Taako was ready to straight up leave the planar system last time we pretended to be married just to get into a gala.”

“To be fair, it was a very good gala.” Lup links her fingers through Barry’s, and almost without thinking, he lifts their hands up to press a kiss against the back of hers. “Really though, you do want to get married? For real this time?”

Barry’s eyes are crinkled in a smile behind his glasses, and Lup doesn’t know how much longer their quest for the Light will continue but she is prepared to spend every day of it with him. “I do, yeah. I don’t- aw, shit, I don’t have a ring on me.’

“Neither do I, but I think that the two most accomplished scientists on all the planes can figure something out,” Lup says. Honestly, she really would have expected this whole proposal thing to be a more formal deal, what with how long it had taken them to get together in the first place. Sitting here, though, hands linked in the lab that they share, it feels as close as perfect can get for people like them. “But! For now, at least, how about this.”

Lup lights a kiss on Barry’s ring finger where it is locked with her own, and a bright red line blooms around it. It’s just a prestidigitation, nothing that will last forever, but that’s okay.

Besides, the look on Barry’s face is one that Lup will remember forever. “I love you,” he breathes out, the words seeming to slip out without his realizing, and Lup ducks her head in a laugh, bumping his shoulder with her forehead.

“I love you too, babe.”

Barry traced a finger around the base of Lup’s ring finger, drawing a line of dark blue behind it. “We’re really getting married,” and there’s awe in his voice at that, so much that Lup can feel it filling her up as well.

“No doubt about it,” she says, bringing her newly marked hand up to Barry’s face, smile softening as he presses his cheek into her palm. Later, there will be time for plans, time to laugh at the look on Taako’s face when he hears about it, time to worry and hold each other through that worry, but they can face that as it comes. In this moment, Lup needs nothing more than to hold her fiance (for real this time!)

Oh, and also to smooch his brains out. That’s high on the list.