#and i was like hmmm how can i get nerds having emotions at me more often

[libbee]

About air lovers

Air men (moon in gemini/libra/aquarius//moon in 3rd/7th/11th house)

1. Racing thoughts, if I think it I will speak it, I need to speak, no I cannot think internally I need to speak, tell, blurt it out to someone.

2. See, unless you stimulate me, please dont try to befriend me. I am volatile and versatile. If you are not a quick thinker, chatty, conversationalist, how will we connect and bond? How will we stay friends? What do we talk about-you ask? We talk about history, universe, biology, business, science, news, cinema, TV shows, your pet, my pet? No, we dont talk about how I feel, we dont talk magic, we talk concepts and ideas. Emotions are magical, you see. How those witch babes manipulate energy for spells, I am a "how to make friends and influence people/rich dad poor dad" kind of person. Please dont tell me about your healing powers, I am a metacognition/neuroscience kind of person.

3. You are either fun or boring. Sorry, I cannot see anything else that makes a person worthy of my friendship or relationship. My partner is my best friend, we talk, share our thoughts with each other, laugh out loud, we are constantly texting. I only date people who are mentally stimulating. Though I am not too romantic and I dont offer emotional intimacy, but I can offer you a fun time and belly full of laughter. Sorry sir, we dont do inner work here, we dont do self reflection here, we are not that deep. We are all about ideas, thoughts and reasoning. Emotions make things messy and complicated. Y'know I dont have that stability to sit down and get in touch with my feelings. I can be meeting new people in that time, that's just who I am. So if you are someone who's looking for emotional vulnerability, emotional sharing of insecurities and complexes or trying to make me spiritual then I cannot do that, please find someone who is compatible with you. I am not spiritual, I am logical. Sorry, I dont understand what you mean when you say that you are feeling shame/fear/anger, I just dont let feelings trap me, I just move on to the next thing. I dont understand what healing means, I am just not meant for these things. I dont understand what you mean when you say soul or spirit or divine or energy, are these not just words? Where is the proof they exist? You're intuitive? Hmmm, I am more of a thinker type. You're into astrology and tarot? Oh, I am an economics nerd, there is so much to learn and understand in the real world, why are you lost in virtual, spiritual, magical world?

4. I need variety. You can be the most mentally stimulating person in the world but I still need variety. I just need variety. It is not about you, it is about me. Conversations, connections and chatting give me validation, they are fuel to my engine. When I am with you, I wonder what am I missing out on? Please dont feel sad about it, see that's why I dont like feelings. Life is supposed to be fun not serious. I need to try out new things and meet new people. More I try, more I learn. I like mental and emotional freedom. I like playfulness and joy of living. Let's hangout for lunch tomorrow? That's how I like to bond and connect with you. I am not shallow, the right people will understand that I am a very fun and smart friend. You have emotional needs, I have mental needs. We are different. "Let's hangout for lunch tomorrow":

5. LMAO, that's my new joke. My mom was like... and my dad was like.... lmao, seriously that was so funny. You dont like jokes? You're offended, triggered, taking it personally? What even.. How can someone not like jokes? Laughter is the best medicine, my friend. I self actualize with jokes, I roast myself, I twist events to make them funny. I want people to have a fun time with me. I dont know how people can sit in silence and paint or draw or meditate for hours or enjoy their own company. I would rather play video games, watch TV, write some essay or shoot some video for YouTube or tiktok or Instagram-I need motion, movement, to do something. Next task ✅ Next task ✅ Next task ✅ I get bored if I stay at one place for too long.

Air men (sun in gemini/libra/aquarius//sun in 3rd/7th/11th house)

1. If you want to torture me, keep me isolated in a room. Social groups are where I thrive. I cannot stand solitude, simply because being solitary means to sit with my emotions, thoughts, insecurities, complexes and face them. I cannot do that, I just cannot.

2. Fortunately, my life theme attracts many opportunities to make friends/socialize/meet a lot of people on daily basis. Astrology not only tells personality traits but also life event patterns. 3rd, 7th, 11th houses deal with other people, networking, public interactions, connections and relationships, you see the association? Some are born lone wolf, we are not. I can never be a monk, I dont have the emotional discipline for that, though I can be your travel partner to Thailand when you visit a monastery, I love to explore new places.

3. I need you to like me, I am really good at studying others. I like to keep a lot of connections, I like to network with people, people are assets, friends for life, there is nothing much in life. Hanging out with friends, being around people, socializing makes me feel alive, rejuvenated and meaningful. I am a bit of chameleon, yeah so what, you are too. People are not one dimensional, what is this obsession with authenticity? Do you even know who you really are, duh!!

4. When I meet someone, I notice their desirable qualities, what makes them attractive, what is their best quality and I internalize that, make it my own, morph myself into a desirable person. More similar we are, stronger our bond will be. I know I am not authentic but it is simply not my nature to be so. Please appreciate me for what I am capable of offering you. I can be a really nice actor though, I have the charisma and versatility for it.

5. They call me charming. Because my personality shines. I am the person people approach when they are at the cashier. I am the person people approach when I am just minding my own business. I appear desirable, friendly and safe to people. You wouldn't approach an intimidating, stiff, serious person, will you? Let's see it this way, water man and I enter a bar. Bartender greets both of us. Water man emits vibes that provoke uncomfortable emotions, insecurities and traumatic memories in the bartender. But I emit vibes that are comfortable, friendly and safe to feel. I am more approachable. This is because I dont spend my time exploring my depths, complexes, psyche. I am the person who runs the community, I run the entertainment business, I run the economy. If everyone sat down to do self introspection and inner work then who will take care of the material world? See-leave it to me, I can handle that. 

6. Though I make a loyal partner when I am mature. I am loyal because cheating is too much of mess for me for too little return. I am not really obsessed with power, I am the sigma not the alpha, we are equals, I dont want to be superior to you-I dont want power over you. I want to be your friend. I make love with my friend. You are my friend and you are my lover. I dont like power games. Though if I have fire/water placements too then I can be power centric otherwise I am just the equal dynamic type. I am a very balanced type of person.

[oldsargasso]

ep 3 stream of conscious thoughts!

so I went and rewatched ep 2 in the hopes I might remember who is who🤞With the ending reveal that Tyme is working against the gambling ring, the way he listens to the woman in the hospital about how she lost her son to debt makes more sense now. Wondering if Tyme knew the son specifically, or someone like him - he obviously has a personal motivation to take out Great's family's business. (thunderstorm while she's talking - coming back I don't think we got a thunderstorm in ep3?)

also the fakeout on the identity of the dead guy is so perfect even second time around

I never noticed the hospital logo before; the cross with a heartbeat rhythm going through. subtle!

also how is Tyme literally looking in a mirror yet is surprised to find Bee behind him when he turns around. he must've really been focussed huh

the high-pitched flatline whine during serious moments…god this show is so good

okay NOW i'm gonna watch ep3

is that the body from ep2's first scene? my interest in the brother character (??name I should remember) would go up immeasurably if he was secretly a serial killer ngl. probably more like he's revenging his brother by killing his killer the same way which is also pretty good. coming back to remind myself his name is Tonkla.

oh Great asked him? hmmm.

bed #4 you love to see it!

so Tyme has a bit of a saviour complex. or control issues (relatable). Dr Den might be a little too emotional for this part of the job though

Great has a pool table in his place? I desperately need a floor plan of his apartment. how is he living like this. not the #4 ball as the phone shows 11:01 this episode was like SEE. DO YOU GET IT YET. idc I love it

do we think Great is a little dumb? if I thought I was seeing things and recently acquired a headwound I would definitely be seeing many doctors immediately. oooh LUCKY there is one doctor already on the case it seems

(so Tyme just showed up at Great's school - how does he know where Great goes to school/when he's there - and asks a random student to give Great a drink from him?)

"can you forgive me Great?" omgggg. vision of the future or a divergent timeline orrrrr.

I don't care if the flirting has ulterior motives it's adorable and I love it

so Great's ~episodes~ are 100% being used to get him to alter his actions/path to move toward Tyme. I like the theory that it's future-Great coding out manipulating his past self but also I enjoy the idea that it's someone else (Tyme himself?)

Tyme clearly thinking "okay so it's you…who should be a psychiatric patient". personally I would've been like let's go to the hospital and get an MRI or something but asking your friends is doing something too I guess

P'Tyme 🥺

I love how much interaction we get of Tyme and other staff in the hospital, so we get to see the different sides of him. the way he and Den are together is DELIGHTFUL.

fascinating (and feels a little like we're getting dessert first) that it's only ep3 and we're already getting the characters talking and linking things we as the audience got to do earlier, like the heart patient who mentioned 4 minute future to Den.

Tyme's already asking "why 4 minutes?" this show is so good to me. I have medical-related theory that I generally feel like the show will go for, but I'm interested to see how it plays out

they're on a date your honour. what if Tyme was hungry though. circling back to my "is Great just dumb" question because clearly it's going through Tyme's mind rn. I think it's just a matter of privilege in this case though.

Tyme's a nerd too. control issues peeking through!

(the need I have for a terrible cat soft toy is ever growing)

the juxtaposition of Great's (bright red) car against the dilapidated fence around Tyme's house…chef's kiss. I love that they're having a little conversation about their different statuses.

the way they perfectly captured the awkwardness of sitting in the car at the end of a date lmao. the heaviness/weight/don't know what word I mean in the way Great moved his arm was perfect.

(not really relevant to this scene but do we know how old Tyme is?)

Great truly living out the stereotype of held a guy's hand once and is already picturing their life together

it's interesting that they said specifically 4 minutes into the future but Great is clearly seeing more than that when he is with Tyme. they're gonna kiss and then Tyme's grandma is going to be standing there like :| OR NOT LMAO she's not even looking you can still go for it my guy

you may have ONE of the many cat toys we won

I know it was mostly a pause for emotional processing but good to see Great is the wait until you're inside kinda guy

my girl better be getting very richly rewarded for all the work she is doing to take down this gambling ring. I hope she gets to kill someone

NOOO. jump into the water!!

feel like the chief could've handled that better. and more privately. that was like textbook suspicious

omg that zebra artwork!!

okay I zoned out let me start this scene again. this couldn't have been a phone call? oh I guess not lol

couldn't even close the drawer properly smh rookie move

he's a cop!!! dude. not only is he grieving he's high af right now.

I'll be honest I skipped the sex scene so if it had important character work or something let me know

Tonkla's definitely using sex to foster intimacy I just hope he's doing it in a manipulative way

I guess it makes sense that they all go to the same school. a case for divergent timelines I think re: the identity of the deceased

smoking and watching traffic in his underwear, Great has the most relatable hobbies

ohhh progression!!! 11.02. two more minutes to go?

look at Great using 2 colours for his little brainstorming. now that is organised. I like how he immediately calls tyme like. maybe he's at work. (I think the "sex?" note should be screenshot and used everywhere)

"do not hurt her under any circumstances" except for she already got shot so

well I guess the good doctor is at work in a way. is this the most soundproofed open hallway in existence?

was that a look of recognition or not. I guess not. okay Tyme!!! we love a man of action with a brain.

ughhh is it next Friday yet.

[zealsoughtsequesterustanxiedemon]

Hmmm looked up some Fabiniku spoilers for the JP manga (EN translation is like 40 chapters behind, and at the pace they're going they're not getting there for a year plus). Definitely some disappointment.

From what I can gather Tachibana has confidently decided to stay a girl. I'm not gonna assume any certainty on some words from google translating a chinese translation of a JP manga, but roughly it's like she doesn't feel like a guy anymore when in her isekai guy body AND she wants to be with Jinguuji as a girl. It went "I wanna be your best friend and your girlfriend" and then ended on the punch line "I have completely turned into a girl" with Jinguuji screaming.

I've got complex feelings about this. If you've seen my opinions on the series before you definitely know that, although I'll probably enjoy it regardless, a heterosexual relationship ending is the possibility I wanted the least. A lot of that is do to my personal bias. I'm a bi man; I'm going to have a preference for the story that's being playful with sex and gender to have the main relationship be gay and include a man. Also, being a fan of gender bending manga (with my own feelings on gender), I prefer a male MC to not have his gender changed (in spite of his altered body) because the opposite is kind of the default. I'd have def preferred she had remained a man at heart, be somewhere between, or veer off the binary entirely.

So for Fabiniku, I feel like we've closed off the possibility for most of my preferred endings. So with that comes a lot of disappointment. I won't say all of those endings are impossible, but, being 200 chapters in, they seem rather unlikely. I'd need to see the nuance in the language she uses and I'm not getting that until EN TL catches up. Part of me is also a bit bitter at the author for their note on chapter 1 about "All I wish to convey via this manga is a form of love that isn't bound to terms such as BL or TS". Because this development just makes it feel like TS to me. The MC taking a while to figure out her gender and shacking up with her male best friend is like business as usual lmao. I'm hoping the nuance changes my mind, but I'll have to see.

Disappointment aside, this isn't a deal breaker or anything. Like the story's still good. I still want these nerds to get together and work through their weird feelings even if it isn't in the form I want the most. I still like TS and I still like straight romcoms. I think this just may cap how much I'll love it, where it previously had the potential to be everything I ever wanted or to pull me in a new direction I hadn't experienced, it feels as if it is NOT going to do that. And I guess it's good to know that early. Although I haven't experienced it in a while, I've been known to get quite emotional and even hateful of these kinds of stories when they betray my expectations like that; enough so that I'll often peek ahead if it's finished to see where things end. Fabiniku's good enough that they've already foreshadowed this kinda development 40+chapters ahead so I was already preparing my heart, but this helps even more. I don't think I'll be soured on it :D

As a sort of final note, I learn time and time again with media, that although stuff can be exactly what you want, it's highly unlikely. If you want something the only way to guarantee getting it is to get writing.

[harurio]

guardian ep5

@oneiro-nautical i hope you are having a lovely day

shades of the distinctly green bathwater in secret of the valet

'move out of the staff dormitories' 1) the staff live in dorms? 2) i sense an opportunity for cohabitation/forced proximity..........

lin jing is so funny i love him

oh okay shen wei has a house. that uni must pay him real good

this is just like on supernatural

the butler did it.

get that old man's ass shen wei!!! (nonsexual)

phone convo! in spirit they are both lying in bed kicking their feet twirling their hair. i can tell. i miss having a landline my parents had one in our old apartment and i still know its number by heart

two babies in this photo plus one grumpy old man

okay i will not laugh, i won't, but the kid turning from a poorly animated water figure into just some dude and the old guy whooshing around like the flash is kinda getting me

i'm sorry i know and respect that they're trying to hit these emotional beats but something about it just isn't working for me this ep i'm struggling so hard idk why it's so funny

YES almighty zhao yunlan step in and save us from the rest of this fight scene

hiiiiiii shen wei we have not seen you in foreverrrrr

ooh cool first glimpse of the underworld. looks kinda like the burial mounds in the untamed except lower budget. love the color scheme

zhao yunlan shuffle-jogging along is kinda cute

shen wei your sleeve garters are KILLING ME you're such a fucking nerd (salivating) (who said that)

(zhao yunlan said it that's who)

now look at this.

a baby

hmmm a locked room mystery! exciting! i like how they're overlapping mysteries in each episode, keeps us on our toes

i have romance on the brain, i keep seeing opportunities that a bl would take and run with (caretaking, cohabitation, etc) and that's not what this story is primarily about, it's a supernatural/crime drama with a homoerotic subplot. so i gotta be patient to see more weilan interactions. i'm excited to see how the pieces of the big story start coming together though!

[inquisitorius-sin-bin]

11. which three of your fics do you think best exemplify your work?

18. if you associate music, media, or poems with your fics, pick one and tell us about that association and why it inspired you.

24. how do you feel about the very first fic you published?

25. how do you feel about the most recent fic you published?

11. which three of your fics do you think best exemplify your work?

Hmmm

Studied and Praised, Comparative Anatomy, and Ride or Die.

Something about those three in particular, I think it's me exercising the ability to expand upon canon with new and innovative ideas regarding the history or biology of the SW universe. That's where I really like to be. I'm a nerd at heart. As much as I enjoy exploring other emotional beats and challenging characters, I love diving into research, having 20 tabs open from "how does throat singing work" and "saddle anatomy" to "Darth Sanguis' laboratory". Like If I may, my standard tab setup currently for Ride or Die, with just my commonly-used references open.

18. if you associate music, media, or poems with your fics, pick one and tell us about that association and why it inspired you.

I can't hear this song without thinking of Theo singing it, leading his warriors into a battle across the Plains, 200 Da's and Dei's armed to the teeth on dactillion-back.

Admittedly the lyrics do not translate super coherently from Mongolian to English but it is a war song, it's powerful, it feels right. The "Hu" they chant is like a call of "Mankind", brotherhood, kinship, a group of people. So I think it works well for Theo and the Plainsmen. Some selected lyrics:

Except some translations of the last line say "Mark of Chinggis" which I think is very fitting.

24. how do you feel about the very first fic you published?

I don't even remember them but I'm sure they weren't great lol

25. how do you feel about the most recent fic you published?

That would be Ride or Die Chapter 20.

It wasn't my strongest chapter, but overall, I'm still really enjoying writing this piece. I like being able to add subtle touches to the world, like the bell above the tent door to ask for permission to enter when both flaps are closed (plainsman universal for "don't bother me") because what else are you supposed to do, knock?

I like occasionally getting to show the Theo that once was. The Theo that loved fiercely, before he was burned. The soft and tender and just man behind the grizzled and hardened exterior.

I missed out on adding one detail which, if I wasn't releasing chapter by chapter and maybe taking more time, maybe I would have been able to add it in, but it doesn't necessarily make that much of a difference. I can add it in later. I was just like ugh, man, when they are riding out behind Dralla in the field, imagine how intimidating it would sound- not only the sound of the dactillion's feet hammering the ground- but repeatedly I've mentioned the bells and the bones on their armor, which are meant to rattle as they ride and intimidate their enemies. Opportunity missed. But like I said, I can always add that in later.

Thank you for asking!

[thatcharmingjerk]

15 questions/15 people

got tagged by @angry-velociraptor , cheers!! I love these things! :D I’m just horrible at remembering to actually do them!! x’’’’3 

1. are you named after anyone?

HMM I guess?? Like my given name was after a granma of mom or something I think but my real (second) name is after dads dad! 

2. when was the last time you cried?

I really can’t say???? I don’t really cry because of sadness these days but i do tear up because of dumbest shit!!! Its wild how easily I can get happy/emotional tears!!!

3. do you have kids?

oHOHHAHAHAAAHA nope. No thank you. At least I have that going on for me for being trans!!!

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

I don’t know ;;w;; Sometimes yes but I think people sometimes depict stuff I just say as sarcasm idk!!!! I used to be sarcastic me thinks?? These days not that much tho??

5. what’s the first thing you notice about people?

HMMM like- the aura??? The presence??? Style, what you’re wearing, what accesories there is, piercings, tattoos, or lack of them! Height too, kinda at least like I just noticed last time I met a friend how short she is????? And I’ve known her for like 5 years!!?!?!?!? I’m also very bad with faces! 

6. what’s your eye color?

Greyish blue! 

7. scary movie or happy endings?

As a greedy bisexual; BOTH!!!! Seriously tho both have their charm, and they don’t really even exclude each other. I don’t really have preference for either, if the movie is good then its good!!!

8. any special talents?

Well, art?? And I can move my ears at will!! 

9. where were you born?

In hopsital öhöhöhhehehvfgdjfs but yea Finland

10. what are your hobbies?

Arts and crafts, as you can guess, drawing/painting/sculpting/needle felting, but I hike/take walks with the dogy, I love watching birds and other creatures and nature in general on walks..! Moss is life!!! I keep plants and aquarium, i’d love to get second tank only for shrimps!! And paleontology and mythology nerding, i do play them cursed videogames bit too, oh yeah I read too, like actual books of paper!! Tryna teach myself to read more again!! That’s some of it! 

11. do you have any pets?

Dogy and fish!! Aamu the dog and Peetu the kala!!! also shrimps! 

12. what sports do you play/have you played?

Not really anything?? Haha, like I used to really like football and uhh salibandy?? sähly??? as kid (idk floor ball??? ground hickey!?!?!?) and participated on class teams (badly cause I was astmathic fat kid) for those and also randomly in basket ball too??  I wasn’t really athletic but I wish I had been!! I did some horse riding too, nothing proper though cause we were poor but yeahh..! 

13. how tall are you?

166cm, i’mma short king ! 

14. favorite subject in school?

As kid I liked almost everything, I used to love math, but hmm, lets say art and biology!! 

15. dream job?

Oughhhhh idk............. Part time something???? I wish I could do more ceramics?? But idk, maybe concept artist or character designer?? Maybe paleoartist??? idk, tbh I been thinking about applying for retirement and just do whatever dabbling |’’’3 I think I really need to get my mental health in order properly before I can really think career??? I really wish I had some sorta handler or secretary or manager anyways !!!!!! Oh right if i didn’t have allergies I’d probably be some sorta animal dude, like horse trainer or something!! 

tagging: HMM LETS SEE @lil-bear-femme @kuoringankalmo @theonlygayinoulu @niborniac @chundertale 

[scarletrigmor]

Fic writer interview!

Got tagged by @aarafox, oh myyyy thankksss :DDDDD

Name/nicknames: I go by the name Rin, its nickname from my Weeb years, but apparently its stuck with me and I can’t change it.

Fandoms: Hyperfixate in Sk8 the infinity, but since I’m a multifandom I’m also in Balance Unlimited, The Witcher, Voltron, MIraculous Ladubyg (I need to catch up ) Kingdom hearts, Banana Fish, Tokyo Revenger, etc etc etc etc

Two shots?: I have like 7 or something, and 1 multichap.

Most popular multi-chapter fic: Back in the day when I was in highschool I had a Ciel x Sebastian Modern AU that was pretty popular in the LATAM fandom. but as of now, none of my fics is popular XD

Actual worst part of writing: proofreading. It takes me much more time that actually writing

How you choose your titles: It depends, sometimes its a related to the content it self, ​or a weird phrase i came up later

Do you outline?: I do now, because i need to organize the events. I’m a walking mess of ideas.

Ideas you probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?: Hmmm... A Renga Dance AU, Anything based on actual series, but make it Renga. (Im clearly not obsessed)

Callouts @ me: Stop procrastinating b*tch, it takes you 6 months to upload a chapter or finish b-day presents.

Best writing traits: I love doing angst dialogues, i tried to put as much as emotion as I can, I even have to act them to get the idea.

Spicy tangential opinion: I hate when people don’t separete paragraphs, it hurts my eyes and I get lost

Tagging @seri-vanya @elillierose  @a-different-breed-of-nerd @wehaveastark. you are all the writers i know, feel free to do this if you want!!

[badgirlcovenrep]

atlas

Alex Chen × Steph Gingrich fluffy comfort one-shot

(I was talking to a friend about the game and we were discussing how Alex is probably still carrying a lot of trauma. And even after everything that happened at the mines we still don't see her really grieve for the whole situation and herself. So- I had to write it, you know?)

Enjoy!

TW: mentions of suicide, death and mental health issues.

It's two months into their relationship now, and they are somewhere in a Californian town, living in a tiny apartment close to the beach. They play together in small venues and underground clubs. Alex bartends and Steph referees for DND campaigns at a nerd bar they found by chance on their first week there.

They're happy. As happy as Alex remembers being since she was- well, maybe nine.

Every day, it's a little like waking up into a dream. Living in an apartment with her first girlfriend, listening to music as they cooked dinner together. Getting to kiss her just because Alex felt like it. Because her heart went a little loopy inside her chest when she smiled. Because she knew Steph would hold on to her waist and make her feel like she was full of electricity.

The 'falling in love' business felt overrated before Steph.

But Being in the middle of it now, Alex doesn't think there's anything better.

Although a part of her still felt quite numb - she guesses it's not something that will go away that easily - and day by day, Alex felt a little bit more like she could breathe... like she was finally letting herself go, at least a little bit.

****

Now that she could comprehend and use her powers, it also seemed as if she'd started to become even more of a magnet for all sorts of emotion around her. And apparently Alex could do it in her sleep too.

The nightmares came in clusters most of the time, a badly cut-together mess of voices and feelings. The lady that lived under them, who lost her son when he was little. The couple from down the street, who were going through a hard time in their relationship. Even the little girl from upstairs, who had terrible night terrors of sharp-teethed monsters reaching from under her bed.

They all mixed inside her head until she woke up gasping for air and sizzling with emotion.

It was rare that she'd have a full dream, one that made sense and completed itself, but when she did they were always about Gabe. About sitting together at the rooftop of the Lantern and sharing a beer. Or climbing trees, like they used to do when they were little.

It was a relief from the usual doom.

And that dream was supposed to be nothing different. Or at least she thought it wasn't.

****

In it, they were at the ravine. A world of twinkling stars shining above their heads. The Colorado mountains all around them creating a landscape that was just as beautiful as it was bittersweet. Alex could see the log she'd crossed, still standing between her and the tiny outcrop of stone Ethan had been stranded on.

She hadn't dreamed of the ravine since leaving Haven Springs, but while she was there, Alex dreamt of it every night. She would see it when her eyes were closed. She could hear it, - the sirens, the terrible, deafening rumble of the ground splitting beneath them. The panic, pounding into her ears.

But this is different. Because when she looks around, Alex realizes she's standing over the elevated plateau, tied to the waist and leaning all her weight against a sturdy piece of rock.

Looking at her from below is Gabe. Lying on the cold ground. A cheesy smile spread across his face.

"Why are we switched?" Alex asks because that's all she can think of asking, as she stares at the rope that anchored her to the ground... to Gabe.

"Beats me. This is all your brain, not mine." He says, and Alex huffs in annoyance, "you know what's going to happen, but you keep coming here."

"I don't have a choice."

"Hmmm..." Gabe hums, but there's some humor in his expression as he stares intently back at her, "and that's exactly why... I'm here because I should say goodbye."

A coldness spreads over Alex's limbs. Around her, the very fabric of the dream dims into darkness as a strong breeze blows past them. She suddenly feels like throwing up.

"What- what does that mean?" It's a stupid question. This is her dream. Alex knows what it means.

Deep down, she knew she'd been conjuring him up for her own sake. Trying to bring back any morsel of relief into the giant hole he'd left inside her heart. However, Alex also knew at some point he'd be gone- she just didn't expect-

"You don't need me anymore, Alex." He says. As if it's that simple. As if she'd ever-

"I'll always need you, Gabe. Of course I need you." The words stumble out of her mouth, and she can feel the hot, angry tears falling down her face.

It feels like a hot iron pressed to the very top of her chest.

Like lava, boiling up into her bloodstream until Alex wants to punch something. The steam that prickles from under her skin, fighting to break free.

Anger always comes first when people feel cornered. It's something she noticed a while back. Out of all the emotions Alex had dealt with the past few months, that, at least, hadn't changed.

"Shit, Gabe. When you died I needed you more than ever."

"But we can't fix that, can we?" He asks, and another wave of anger rips through her. She looks anywhere but him, because Alex feels that if she does, she'll tackle and kill him all over again. But when he says nothing and they're left in the same pocket of silence - the one right before the whole world collapsed - her eyes eventually fall back to her brother. Tied to her and laid on the ground beneath. Looking at her like just as much the goofy asshole she missed so much.

Anger always felt urgent and fast, like a flash going through her body and leaving everything inside it in disarray. It demanded to be completely felt, but only for the moment it took for Alex to decide it wasn't worth launching the nearest object at a window.

Or trying to kill her dead brother.

"You might have needed Gabe. But you don't need this Gabe anymore, Alex. You can do it on your own now."

The fear and sadness that came after? They were usually much, much worse.

"But this is the only Gabe I have."

Those emotions, when mixed, turned into a horrible harmony that paralyzed her lungs and darkened the sides of her vision. They felt just as urgent as anger, but complacent. A beast staring at her from the very bottom of a pit. Tied to her by the waist and trying to lure her down into the abyss.

And, for Alex, the abyss was as deep as a ventilation shaft for a Colorado mining site.

"No, it's not. You'll always have me, Alex. And you know that." Not in the way that matters. Alex wants to say, but it's so redundant. He's the ghost. He should already know that. "And you have Ryan now, and Eleanor, Riley, Charlotte, Ethan... Steph..." he gives her a cheesy smile in the last name, wiggling his eyebrows back at her teasingly.

"Oh, God, way to ruin the moment." Alex can't help but chuckle a little through her tears. Is she blushing? You can't blame her for blushing, right? God, she feels like Diane.

"Hey. Let me have it. One of my only regrets is that I never got to tease the hell out of Steph for dating my little sister... and for being whipped as hell."

"That would have been so funny."

"I knew she'd get along with you but I guess I didn't expect... that. Shame on me. Should've had more artistic vision."

Alex chuckles as more tears run down her face. It's so bittersweet it hurts from the very inside of herself.

"All jokes aside. I'm glad you have her, and that she has you. She's good. Just make sure you tell her I'll haunt her from the grave if her dumb ass breaks your heart, okay?" Alex nods, and her body starts shaking with strangled sobs. So much emotion she just can't let go of. Because if she does, Alex is afraid there'll be nothing left.

"Hey. Don't cry. You can do this, Alex. You know how to live life now."

"I don't want to lose you again, Gabe."

"You'll never lose me. You'll just have to look a little harder." He smiles up at her, pulling jokingly on the rope, "now play your part - or is it my part? You get it."

And then- too soon. (Same as it was that night.) The sirens blast through the mountains, and somewhere above them, a giant explosion blows her eardrums, and boulders the size of cars come tumbling down the mountain.

She barely has time to blink. Barely has time to breathe one last time. Seen as she's Gabe, when she looks up all she sees is the giant rock, flying towards her, hitting her across the torso so hard, before she knows, she's flying way above the ravine, and one last glimpse of the stars catches hold over the veil of her memory before everything turns black.

****

She wakes up in bed, desperately clawing at the top of her chest as she gasps for air. Her lungs feel like they're made of lead, and all around her, she can feel the weight of the rocks, the explosion, the debris, weighing down her body.

Alex pats across the mattress for Steph, who is not there. Another wave of panic washes over her. So strong her mouth turns dry and her head aches as she tries to breathe in, but her lungs can only handle tiny, torturous gasps of half-breath.

Alex dispels a world of curses towards herself inside. Willing her own body to just calm down. In the bathroom, she can hear Steph singing softly to herself- she must have come home late from the DND tournament. Alex told her she'd swing by, but she'd had a long shift and ended up just passing out as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Alex hadn't had an incident like this in very long. She could control it now. Most times. It wasn't easy, with being on the road and constantly surrounded by people. Sometimes, she still got more than she could bargain. When she walked across a depressed person on the sidewalk, or heard one of their multiple neighbors yelling at each other through the walls, and suddenly she felt as if the world blended out of focus into a tsunami of feeling.

Feeling that wasn't hers but still felt so much like it was.

Steph helped whenever it happened. For a sarcastic punk rock mess, she was surprisingly stable and so very reassuring.

Just the fact that she can hear her voice. That Steph is there in the apartment with her, is enough to calm some of her nerves, and while Alex still can't keep herself from pulling in gasps of air as she tries to hold in any kind of oxygen, she at least has a plan.

Water. Water will make her feel better, right?

Almost as soon as the idea crosses her mind, Alex's half-delirious brain commands her to get up, but her body feels so very heavy. Like she's really been trampled over by a wave of giant boulders. And as soon as her feet touch the ground, her legs give up under the weight, and she falls onto the hard floor with a loud, heavy thud.

The girl's hands fly up to hold her weight against the bed, and thankfully that means she doesn't face plant the ground, but it sends her heart into a neck-breaking pace, and all air Alex'd been able to gather so far escapes her in a single huff until she's hyperventilating again, hot, angry tears running down her face.

You're so weak. You're such a fucking idiot. Of course, you had to go and lose Gabe twice, who the fuck would want to stay with such a mess-

"Alex, are you okay?" Steph's voice comes, as she opens the door to find her girlfriend sitting on the ground, looking like she might pass out from just trying to get her lungs to work, "Alex!"

In a second she's crossed their room and kneeled by her, both hands going up to her cheeks on instinct, smearing away her tears.

"Breathe with me, okay? We've done this before, you can do it." She always gets just a tiny bit of a scared aura around her when Alex gets like this, never for long enough that she can read it, but it's still there, the tiny flutter of fear, "come on, breathe."

Her eyes go up to find Steph's, her strong, glittering green gaze. Alex might be the one with superpowers, but it was Steph who could so easily reach in and soften her edges like it was nothing. It was Steph who could just lean in and hold Alex's hand against her chest, letting her feel the determined rise of her lungs. Strong. Stable. Even Alex couldn't possibly understand how she did that.

How she always made Alex's breathing slowly come to shaky, deep breaths, crawling painfully out of her dry throat, but still better than gasping like a fish. Inside her, Alex feels the furious hurricane of emotion, twisting itself into the bottom of her lungs, taking hold of every bit of her until she felt like she could throw up.

"Wait here, I'll get you water," Steph says, and Alex wants to complain, she doesn't want to be alone, even for a second.

But before she can, Steph has left their bedroom for the kitchen, and Alex feels as if she's stable enough to crawl into bed, so she does so at a glacial pace. She grabs Shu-Shu, holding her close to her chest as she sits and waits for Steph.

She eventually comes back in with a glass full and Alex gulps it down in silence, unsure if whatever dam of emotion that has taken place inside of her will break if she tries to speak. So she sets the glass back and lies her head down on the pillow, facing away from Steph and the rest of the room as she tries to reel herself back in.

She can hear Steph taking off her boots and climbing into bed, one arm winding around her waist as she pulls Alex in closer.

"Was it the lady from upstairs?" Steph asks, eventually, after they sit in a few long minutes of silence.

"No." She replies, and it comes out so strangled, so broken, a few more tears run down her face. Steph pulls her even closer, a tight, steady pressure.

"The couple again? I swear to God I'll call the police on that asshole this time."

"No." Alex says, and she detaches herself from Steph just enough so she can turn around and look at her, "I had a dream about Gabe." Simply saying his name makes her whole body shake. Steph is looking at her so intensely, Alex has to close her eyes, holding on to the fabric of her shirt with all she had not to explode in whatever terrifying, dizzying bomb of emotion she could feel brewing inside herself.

Alex felt so much from other people it overwhelmed her multiple times a day, and even then, it was nothing compared to this. Nothing compared to how much sheer strength it took from her not to let it blow.

It scared her. More than anything.

"He wanted to say goodbye." She says eventually, "it was- I don't know. This- I- this isn't coming from anyone- How do I get rid of it? It's like it's all inside of me and it's taking up so much space and I don't know how to fix it" The words come tumbling out before she can stop them, and she's rambling through tears.

Steph sighs. And Alex can feel the love and sadness mixed together, blowing from her in waves as she holds Alex's chin, bringing her up so they can look at each other.

"Baby..." there are tears in her eyes now, as she pulls her closer until their foreheads are touching, and they are so close Alex can smell her lemongrass shampoo, "This is all yours."

And such simple words shouldn't hit her this fucking hard.

But it all suddenly makes so much sense-

Alex was numb after her dad left. She felt nothing for months. It was one of the most terrifying feelings in the world, a deep and powerful depression that threatened to overtake her at any given point.

Like her whole body was nothing but dead weight and her brain was way too tired to even try and keep up.

Young as she was, Alex guesses she never realized the first time she felt anything at all after that was when she discovered her powers. The day a boy came to the orphanage and he was so angry it blew her across the hallway. Ever since then, everything around her was a cacophony of feeling. Coming from every direction. Every street corner, every store, every park.

Every moment of her life since she was eleven, Alex could only feel for others.

"I- I forgot." She realizes, half surprise and half so much sadness another sob breaks through her throat.

Now it made sense, the anger, the sadness, the fear, a hurricane of emotion so very powerful it made her ears ring.

"I'm scared." She admits. Because for someone who had been so focused on learning how to exist among other people's feelings, Alex had no clue how to handle herself, "what do I do with all of this? How do I fix it?"

"Alex. Look at me." Steph brings her face upwards until they are so close, Alex can see the speckles of blue in her eyes, "Gabe died just four months ago, and you were there to see everything- then you got shot and thrown down God knows how many stories into a dark abyss that you somehow walked out of, but not before also finding out about your dad's tragic death - and I haven't seen you cry, actually cry, for yourself, even once."

"I- I can't, it's too much. I don't know how, Steph." Alex had learned her lesson. She'd seen her life as it was and survived it. Deep down she knew it wasn't her responsibility anymore - that it never was her responsibility, to begin with - to hold herself together for others. She knows.

But old habits die hard, and Alex guesses it'll take a while before she starts feeling it too.

Because right now, it still felt like the world might collapse if she wasn't there to hold it together.

"Just- give it to me. Everything you have, I can carry it for you." Steph says, with such determination, Alex actually believes her, but she takes her eyes away, trying to avoid the bubbling of tears threatening to jump out through her throat "Let it go, please, Alex. I can't watch you carry it alone anymore."

At that moment, Alex glances at her again, and there's so much pain, so much love in her eyes, that inside Alex, the dam finally breaks and she's choking on sobs. Tears start running down her cheeks as Steph leans in and pulls her closer, one arm around her shoulder and one on her hip, squeezing tight in reassurance.

If she didn't know better, Alex would've guessed Steph was the one with the superpowers, with the way she coaxes wave after wave of emotion out of her with nothing but her steady presence and quick, light kisses she leaves on Alex's head and hair as she holds on to her shirt for dear life.

It overwhelmed her more than anything she'd experienced so far, and for what feels like hours, she just sobs as Steph holds her.

She cries for her mom. Dead before her time, trying to hold them together to the very end. She cries for her dad, dying a slow death deep underground, a picture of the two children he'd never see again dangling around his neck. She cries for Gabe, for the time they'd never have, for the time they did have.

Above all, for the first time, Alex cried for herself. For being the last out of all of them. For the little girl that had to love and lose every single one of them in succession.

And in the middle of all of it, like a speckle of golden light hidden under all the darkness, for the first time, she feels that it could all start to feel alright.

[pastelslytherin]

Hi, Pastel! How are you, baby?

I was wondering if I could have a match up for jjk. But if you have too many or are sick and tired of writing them TOTALLY IGNORE THIS!!! Matchups can really be exhausting so remember to make time for yourself, ok?

Ok!

OK my name is ally. I have she/her pronouns with a male preference please!

Fandom: jjk

Appearance: I am tall (about 5"11 but i swear i am shrinking) I am pretty lean and muscular. I am an athlete and lift competitively so I have defined muscles and low body fat (which is a nice way for me to say I am shaped like a literal door lol) I am a ginger with short curly red hair and I have quite a few freckles but they are hardly there rn because it's winter

Personality: I am an ENFP 7w6 and I would say I identify with it. My biggest kin of all times is Itadori Yuuji! Honestly I don't think I have ever related to a character more (to the point i was once harassed to join the track team lol). But I also kin bokuto, reki, and tanjiro.

I am a loud person. I have a loud voice and a loud energy. I am a very happy person who loves life. I quite literally cannot keep a straight face. I dance constantly. But not very well. I took formal dance lessons for like 10 years but i prefer to throw it all out and do the running man or the sprinkler. Pretty much dad dance moves.

I love annoying people so much. Teasing, wrestling, singing way too loud. I embarrass my sisters as much as i can in public. Pretty much, my whole personality can be described in having fun. I love having fun and won't do anything that doesn't entertain me.

I am a really laid back person. I don't like planning or anything. I like living in the moment and making things up as I go.

I am a very loyal person. I would do anything for the people who are close to me.

I have always been really popular and have a ton of friends, but there are probably only one or two people in my life who I consider close friends. I hate showing my negative emotions, so I often don't let myself get close to too many people. It's my own fault, but I can get super lonely and sad randomly because I am alone. But i don't want anyone to know i am sad so i don't meet up with people. So it's just a mess.

I can be shy for like 2 seconds when i first meet someone, but i warm up pretty fast. But i can get really shy around my crush, and I will probably blurt something awkward and blush like crazy.

Also I can be overcritical and hard on myself. I think this comes from my lifting. I never feel like I am strong enough and have high standards for my performance.

Likes:

-lifting weights. Honestly, the gym consumes my life and brings be joy more than anything else in the world

-watching sports. I used to play basketball and volleyball. I don't anymore but I love watching. So I will go to the games at my school and cheer. You bet I'm the one with face paint screaming and leading the student cheer section.

-listening to music. I am a huge music nerd who makes way too many playlists.

-learning languages

-my mind honestly just went blank. I forgot every thing I have ever liked

Dislikes:

-hmmm i don't like nutella

-or the sound of people filing nails

Love Language:

-hmm for giving I would say acts of service. I love helping people. I'm not very good with my words. I have no problem telling my friends that i love them or even strangers HOWEVER (and this is genuinely like the only thing I hate about myself) if it is someone who really really means a lot to me, i suddenly can't do it. It's like I just have so much love and gratitude for them that I can't say it in words. I will choke up and blush like crazy. And it drives me insane, because I want to tell them how important they are to me, but i can't. So instead I just devote my literal life to them by helping them in any way i can.

-for receiving, probably quality time or words of affirmation. I get really nervous and self conscious sometimes that people don't actually like me or want me around. So when someone goes out of their way to spend time with me, it makes me melt. Words of affirmation are just a bonus. It doesn't need to be often, but I like to hear it ya know?

overall, im not too picky. The guy doesn't need to be perfect, I just want someone who is loyal and will always have my back. And put up with me and my antics lol

Ok babe! Sorry this got long! Please take care of yourself and drink water and take breaks and all that ok? <3<3

Hello, Ally! I’m sorry this took forever! I am doing well, thank you for asking and thank you so much for your kind words! I very much appreciate your patience and your lovely request! I hope you’re taking care of yourself and that you’re having a wonderful day :)

Also, this match includes a character from the manga, in case anyone out there hasn’t read it.

I match you with..

AOI TODO

Todo loves your personality, your muscles, the way you live in the moment, and the way you can steal the spotlight in any room. And most importantly, he never feels bored with you! He has stars in his eyes when you’re around, and you can match his high energy perfectly. It’s rare that Todo finds someone fun and interesting so you are a very important person to him. When you get past his strange behaviors, he’s a very loyal, supportive, and passionate partner. 

You can get along with almost everyone because of your attractive personality, which is just about the opposite of Todo. On a social level, you could probably balance out Todo’s eccentric attitude with your friendliness. You can bring out the best in him, and he can bring out the best in you. He’s smarter and more logical than he looks so he knows exactly how to motivate you and inspire you on a very real level. Overall, your relationship is very energetic, collaborative, and fun. 

Headcanons:

When you first meet Todo, he could probably intimidate you at first from his forward and crude attitude when meeting someone for the first time. Being Todo, he’s immediately drawn to your height and muscles, quickly asking you what your type is. For you, he could be easy to warm up to since both of you can share a braincell. 

Todo is almost like a puppy when it comes to you so it’ll be hard to find yourself alone. He’ll stick by your side as often as he can and is thirsty for attention. In turn, he loves giving you attention and is very observant and attentive toward you. He says things as he sees them like, “Are your muscles getting bigger?” and then guesses the pounds/kilograms you can lift. On a side note, he’s a pretty accurate guesser. 

Gym dates with you and Todo are almost a given. Whenever he’s spotting you, he’s very encouraging and motivating, but he also keeps on eye out for when you push yourself too hard. 

He’s definitely the type of boyfriend to call you ‘dude’ or ‘bro’ unironically. Then again, this is likely because not only does he feel close to you on a romantic level, he also feels close to you as a friend. It’s that kind of intimacy that makes your relationship feel secure and stable despite all the wild things you two like to do together. You two could dance wildly at a party as if you’re the only two people in the room, and he absolutely loves it. 

Whenever you’re watching basketball or volleyball together, it would quickly turn into a cheering match where you two are trying to scream louder than each other. It’s the same way when Todo brings you to a Takada concert, and he would be so joyful that you’re cheering for his favorite idol. And of course, he’d be there for all of your lifting competitions, screaming all sorts of praises and commentary. If you don’t hear him cheering you on in the background, that’s probably because he was pulled outside for being too loud. 

Todo wouldn’t mind if you have trouble choosing the right words since he’s more of a ‘showing through action’ guy than a ‘showing through words’ guy. He’s very loud in his romantic gestures in which he would bring you obnoxiously hug gifts and yell at the top of his lungs how much he loves you. But, if he sees you’re feeling down, he’d use his words to see what the problem is and reassure that you are, in fact, enough and that you’re valuable. 

Other potential matches:

Kinji Hakari

Hakari would love your passion so you would interest him to no end. That’s a trait that is extremely important to him since he enjoys seeing people drown in their passions. He would admire you because of how much you stand out, since he hates traditions and a lack of passion. In other words, he absolutely loves your crazy antics. Some of his favorite things are watching you dance and lift weights. He thinks you look the most beautiful when you do the things you love. He’s a big fan of watching sports too, and he would invite you to join him in watching his fight club. He also makes a point of saving your playlists so he can listen to them while he’s watching his security cams. Hakari could honestly a very close second as a match if you prefer someone who’s just a bit more chill and quieter. 

Takuma Ino

Ino thinks you’re really fun! He’s a very positive and open person, and he’s big on loyalty and honesty so it’s extremely easy to warm up to him. He would be very encouraging and supportive of your life as an athlete, and he’d definitely be someone who would prepare water bottles and meals for you. He also does his research on how best to support your weightlifting career since he believes in supporting you in the right way. He really loves being with you and telling you how amazing you are, and he could relate to having high standards to reach so he makes sure to tell you that you’re perfect the way you are. He also gets flustered when you do things for him, even though a lot of people tend to help him with things. 

———

I hope this was alright!

Please look over this post before submitting a matchup request :) Thanks!

[yesokaythatsfine69]

The Beach (Levi Ackerman x reader)

Description: During the beach scene in attack on titan. I changed this scene a bit because I felt it could be more light hearted and more fun after the cut. So be aware that it may not be that exact scene (in terms of what gets said) but roughly the same idea.

Characters: Y/n, Levi, Hange, Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Jean, Sasha, Connie

Pov: third person

Warnings: none, this is pure fluff and just chill vibes.

A/n: HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEVI ACKERMAN! Hello! As of right now I'll be focusing the next several pieces on AOT. This is the third and the final piece I'll be writing about Levi. Feel free to request any Levi Ackerman writings at any time though. Have a good read!

Word Count:

Song suggestion: This has nothing to do with this piece but I've been jamming to Judas by Lady Gaga so if ur not a nerd listen to it.

*none of the Gifs used are mine, full credit goes to the maker

The dust that Scout's horses picked up enclosed around them, swallowing them up in a thick cloud of brown. The air was similarly thick around them.

Her hands were shaking, clutching the reigns of her horse, pulling them close to her chest. Y/n wasn't scared though. The things she'd experienced in the almost four years since she'd joined the scouts had changed what the concept of fear was for her. She felt tense- anxiety ridden. She felt like something was about to happen, and the way Eren spoke- it definitely was.

They passed a wall, and Eren's voice cut through the long silence. "I'm sure of it. This is the place where they turned the Eldians titan, which means just up there."

He beckoned them on, rushing his horse forward. Armin swallowed harshly, his eyes meeting y/n's for a beat. They shared a look, that displayed their mutual concerns before it broke.

Y/n had kept close to Armin, whose presence often calmed her. It was strange, but Armin never hid his emotions or disguised his fear (something her friends did so often.) And there was comfort in that. It made her feel less vulnerable.

Levi often teased her for that- but she knew he respected their friendship. Y/n looked to where he rode ahead of her. His hands were steady, expression focused. It unnerved her how he could be so calm.

She blinked away her focus, returning her gaze back to looking straight ahead. Eren led the group to what appeared to be a cliff, and when they reached the top...they saw.

The group seemed to all stop at once, realizing what they found. It was silent, except for the blowing of the waves before them. It was water- the ocean. They all stared, stunned.

Sasha and Connie had mutual expressions of open mouth wonder. Y/n just stared, aghast. Eren on the other hand looked unsurprised and almost bored.

One by one they slipped off the backs of their horses, most rolling up their pant legs and trodding into the water.

Y/n did a little dance in the water, laughing as Connie playfully splashed Sasha in the eyes. Sasha screamed in pain, "my eyes!" After she recovered, she splashed Connie back. Or tried to. At the last second Connie ducked and the salty sea spray hit y/n dead in the face instead.

"Sasha!" Her friend giggled sheepishly. Y/n tackled her into the water, the two becoming completely soaked. Connie chuckled at their antics, pointing his index finger at them with his right hand and keeping his left to his chest. The two girls shared a mischievous look which caused Connie's laughter to die out immediately.

"Take him down!" "Hiya!" Working in sync the two tackled him into the water. The three resurfaced and giggled at each other's soaked expressions. "It's so salty!" Jean was a few paces ahead of them and had just drank some of the water.

"Jean what the fuck. You really need to stop putting things into your mouth if you don't know what's in them." Y/n stood up, twisting her hair to relieve it of some water. Raising a brow, Jean leaned towards her. "Says the girl deep diving into it. Armin says there's nothing in here but salt anyway, and besides someone was bound to drink from here. I just saved them the extra hassle." Y/n flicked water at him. "How gallant of you."

Eren's monologue interrupted them then, they way he sounded close to tears, his voice creaking at the last sentence begged for their concentration. "Will we finally be free?" No one spoke, whatever light mood that existed now diminished.

"way to kill the mood Jaeger." Jean muttered, but he seemed just as solemn as Eren. "Don't worry, I'll lighten it up." Y/n shoved Jean down, and into the water. He landed with a surprised yelp and everyone turned, broken out of their private misery.

"Really y/l/n!" Jean spat, his cheeks dusted with blush. Y/n giggled, until she was cut off by Jean grabbing her and pulling her down into the water. "Shit!" She gasped out, landing in the water beside him.

"Are you serious! Jean, I just rang out my hair!" Jean opened his mouth to retort when sasha and Connie interrupted, shouting "Dog pile!" Jean and Y/n's eyes widened. "No!" "Wait-!" As Kenny once said, kaboom.

Now, all four of them were completely soaked, but none of them really cared. They bursted out laughing, each pointing at one another in amusement. The reflex seemed almost unnatural- it'd been so long since her last belly laugh. Connie, Sasha, and Jean felt similar and the tears they shed weren't just from their chuckles, but something deeper.

Y/n left the three to splash each other, waddling over to Armin, Mikasa, and Eren. Eren still looked off into the horizon but the tenseness in his shoulders seemed lighter. "What do you have there, Armin." She spoke softly to her friend, marveling at the shell he had gently lying in his palms. "Some sort of shell..." His gaze met hers. "I'm sure there have to be hundreds here." Y/n smiled.

"Did you think it'd be like this? Big, breezy, and beautiful?" Armin looked up, looking beyond Eren. "Maybe something close...I just never expected to actually see it...let alone feel it." They shared another look before they turned to Mikasa. She had gotten closer to Eren, but her gaze was in the water. She was kicking at it, her expression unreadable.

"hmmm." Y/n hummed, tapping her chin. She took off, running past Eren and to the left of him. "Hey! Y/l/n, don't go out too far!" Levi called after her. At the left edge, she stopped, bending down and searching fervently in the waters.

"There must be hundreds..."she mumbled to herself, brow furrowed in concentration. "Ah hah!" She straightened, a single white shell lying in the palm of her hand. She ran back, to armin, mikasa, and Eren. She skidded to a stop directly in front of Mikasa, who gave her an amused look.

Y/n dropped to a knee, sticking up her palm. "For my favorite Ackerman!" "Oi!" Levi grunted from behind her and Mikasa blushed. "Thank you, y/n." The young girl smiled, gently picking up the shell. "You are my favorite y/l/n." Y/n crossed her arms. "I'm the only y/l/n." Mikasa smiled a bit brighter.

Eren had turned towards them, snapping out of his gaze from the unusual commotion. He had watched the two interact and the way Mikasa had gently lifted the shell and just as gently cradled it caused the corner of his lips to upturn.

Y/n noticed. "I can find you one too, Eren. Although I'm afraid finding one as pretty as Armin's is impossible and thus out of the question." Eren softened and shook his head. "No, thank you, y/n." She stood up from her position, and was immediately wrapped in a quick hug from Mikasa.

"Oh! What's this?" Hanje lifted something reminiscent of a burnt rock from the water, gently rubbing her fingers over it. Y/n drew closer, allowing Hanje to explain all of the oddities she found. Y/n nodded along, only half understanding what her friend was ranting about.

Finally Hanje gasped with delight- cutting herself off. "there's more over here!" She pranced away from y/n, pausing several steps away and bending down to search for more.

Finally y/n turned to Levi, who had already been watching her. He seemed so out of place it was funny. His arms were crossed and he looked disinterested...but y/n knew that he was just uncomfortable. They watched each other, taking their differences in.

Really Levi couldn't believe how different two people could be. There y/n stood, a breeze sifting through her hair, her entire outfit completely soaked, and a stupid grin on her face. She was some brat- he'd admit it.

"You're going to get sick, y/n." She smiled, wading through the low tide to where he stood. "You'd love the chance to take care of me." "Tch, I deal with you enough as is." The two had shortened the distance between each other.

The wind ruffled his undercut. "It's a lot less scary than it looks." Y/n gently nudged him with her shoulder. "I'm not scared." Levi gave her a sharp look and anyone one else would've slinked away, but y/n wasn't anyone else- especially not to Levi.

Gently she took his hand in hers, squeezing it softly. He narrowed his eyes, the silver orbs twinkling against the sunset. He interlaced his fingers with her own though, his deep admiration for y/n often undermined his "tough guy" resolve.

Y/n smiled at him, "Okay old man are you going to roll up those pants or will I have to?" Levi sighed, grumbling under his breath as he bent down. "If I get sick from this-" she rolled her eyes. "Levi it's water. The thing you bathe in, clean with, drink. You will not get sick."

He pulled a sock off. "Tch, I once saw you find a piece of uneaten bread hidden behind books in the library, and watched you eat it without question. I don't believe anything you say about what's healthy and what's not, brat." Y/n helped him fold his socks neatly next to his shoes. "That was one time!" He paused. "And it's scarred into my memory."

Again, y/n rolled her eyes. However, the smile on her never even flinched. She grabbed Levi's hand and yanked him forward. He gasped, but y/n only sped up. "Oi, oi, oi, wait! You're going to fast, we'll-" They splashed into the water, splashing it up to their faces.

Levi's eyes were wide, and he seemed absolutely at a loss for what to do with himself. Finally he met her gaze, and saw how she looked at him. Levi felt his cheeks flush. "Tch, fine it's not as bad as I thought." He turned to leave, but she yanked him back to her.

"hey, hey, hey mateo, mateo." She pulled him so that his side was resting against her, he turned back to y/n. "Stay awhile." She said gently. Her smile had changed now, and Levi noticed. His shoulders relaxed. He realized now why this was so important to her. This could be the last chance they had.

Then she kicked water at him.

"Y/n!" She laughed and backed deeper into the water. "You may be humanity's greatest titan fighter..." She began to move her arms around wildly. "But I am humanity's greatest Levi Ackerman fighter." Levi sighed, unamused. "You got water on my pants!" He moved towards her.

"The target approaches, seemingly irritated." She backed away. "Tch, Seemingly?" Levi's hand balled into fists. "He's going deeper into enemy territory, what will y/n do?" "Y/n should run." Levi got closer.

He jumped at her, and she tackled him, the two landing into the water. Once again y/n became instantly soaked, and Levi was now in the same boat, wet completely from head to toe. "It is salty!" Levi gasped out, his arms still wrapped around y/n. "Did you think we were all lying before?" Y/n laughed, watching as Levi struggled to get salty water from his eyes.

He pulled his fist from his eye, finally looking at y/n. She was soaked, probably more than he was, but she was as radiant as could be, her eyes shining, her smile wide, and her hair blowing softly. He stared at her several seconds, lost in how beautiful she was. Sometimes he had a difficult time believing that someone like her could ever be interested in someone like him. "I love you." He clutched her tighter to him.

Her face became more serious, and she closed her mouth. Y/n gently put a wet thumb on his cheek. "I love you too, Levi." They stayed there, in that moment together.

"and yet I'm only your second favorite Ackerman." Y/n sighed, going to pull away, but Levi grabbed her and to her surprise he laughed.

"What's so funny?" Levi and y/n turned, Connie, Sasha, Jean, Hanje, Eren, Armin, and Mikasa all stood over them.

"None of your business, brats." Levi said, crossing his arms. The group shared a glance. "Oh, no, guys wait-" Connie, Sasha, Jean, Hanje, and Mikasa attacked, jumping to tackle them, splashing and creating a mini hurricane.

Armin and Eren watched, still standing. Armin was smiling, whilst Eren's expression still remained cautious. The tension he had carried moments before abandoned him though, and it seemed as though now for the small moment they had, they all realized- only now could they truly live it.

Today was today and that was all they had for certain.

"There's water in a place where water should definitely not be!"

"Don't make me drown you!"

"Who's foot is this?"

"What's gonna happen when we leave? Will we still be wet?"

"GODDAMNIT I KEEP SWALLOWING IT! WHY DOES IT BURN!"

"you all are no match for my skills- I am unconquerable!"

"Yeah, I'm never doing this again."

Armin turned to Eren. "Sometimes... sometimes I believe that it'll never get better than this." He took a breath and Eren put a hand on his shoulder. "Right now...I think...I think you may be right, Armin."

--------------------------------------------------

A/n: hey guys! I hope you enjoyed this, feel free to request more Levi Ackerman or to give critism. Merry Christmas!

--------------------------------------------------

[black-rose-writings]

I read Ruin and Rising because I’m bored

And I also hate myself

Like with the last book, I have a vague idea of the plot and stuff from tumblr and fanfics. I will also be refering to Darkling as Sasha for most of this.

I am still Darklina trash and don’t particularly like Mal.

On a different note, I’ve finally moved for college, but the internet here is trash, so I’ll probably have a lot more reading time now, since most games I play are online and will crash without internet.

Before

Cool story. Let’s hope Alina stays a badass.

Who am I joking, I know how this ends.

Chapter 1

So far so good. I hate the Apparat, per usual. Alina’s there basically dying and that bitch can’t wait to see her do so.

Cult leader to the core this one. He probably hates that his figurehead is alive and also not brainwashed.

Cult leader doesn’t like swearing. How surprising.

My boy David is completely right. What kind of irresponsible dingus keeps centuries old books in a fucking wet-ass cave? (Or a tree for that matter *cough cough* The Last Jedi *cough, cough*).

Genya is fun to be around.

Oh, shit, let’s go.

Chapter 2

Jesus Christ, Alina, Zoya isn’t that bad.

This is one hell of a shitshow.

I live for this version of Alina. Badass. Scary. I want more of this Alina.

Chapter 3

Out of all the random little details from crappy smut fics, I did not expect Oncat to be from the books, lol.

Mal actually has a supernatural tracking ability. Like, literally, they put a bug into the pouch with gunpowder so he could make the shot. I guess this was kinda said before, but never this directly, right?

Alina’s merzost-skyping Sasha now, yay.

Alina is horny for Sasha boy. Yay.

Alina canonically has a praise kink. Nice.

I hate LB with all of my heart at this very moment. How dare she bait us Darklina people like this? How DARE she? (Shipbaiting is the worst, seriously.)

Yes, yes, yes. These two lines. That’s what their relationship is all about. They’re each others foils, the yin to the other’s yang and... ugh. I am Darklina trash to the core and this hurts.

Darklina: You have a terrible taste in men.

Alina: I liked you once.

My boy Sasha walked into that one.

Chapter 4

Alina is a Queen. And we love her.

David, my beloved, my spirit animal.

It’s surprising they can read it at all, given it’s been centuries. Have you ever tried reading medieval manuscripts?

Honestly, with a father that crazy, it’s no wonder Baghra’s a bitch. And I’ve seen it said somewhere that the books imply Ilya’s experiments are what caused Baghra to be a shadow summoner and you know what? I can see how you’d make that connection.

Why is there so few Tidemakers in the books? Waterbenders are useful. I want more waterbenders.

Alina picking up some habits from Baghra I see.

Ah, yes, we love an educated giant.

I’m starting to think Harshaw is a bit nuts.

Shut up, Hershey. Or at least share the weed with the class. I’m not here for this “He’s mean to you because he likes you”. I might believe that in like, elementary school, but yall are (more or less) adults. Jesus.

Well, that was a bombshell of a twist.

Chapter 5

Oh boy, we’ve got some trauma bonding for out merry band of misfits. Yay.

Adrik has a crush on Zoya. And she hates it, lol. Cut the kid some slack, he’s like 15 or something.

That reminds me, I have a four-leaf clover pressed in books from close to year and a half ago. Time flies.

They’re really diving into the Mal has supernatural powers, huh?

Ghosts, let’s go.

Alina “I’m so happy to be outside I start to shine like a fucking fairy” Starkov and Mal is entranced. He’s definitelly nicer now. I’m not forgiving him for all the shit he’s pulled before and for using the silent treatment way too much, but hey, at least he’s improving.

I am not a Zoyalina person, but like... gay? Please? Rivals to grudging allies to friends to lovers, 300k slowburn? Sounds more fun than whatever Mala dn Alina have going on, lol.

(I’m starting to realize I’m not as much a Darklina person as I am anti-Malina person, lol. Like, literally everyone has a more interesting dynamic with Alina than tracker boy over there. Malina is at best boring AF and at worst toxic, codependent and emotionally abusive, while also being boring AF at the same time. It has literally nothing going for it except God herself liking it).

I can see why Nadia is gay in the show. The book version of her definitelly has a crush on Tamar. Homegirl likes a woman, who can murder her with the flick of her wrist and honestly? Same.

Alina has some big “coming out of lockdown after a year” energy atm.

The cat is one of the most realistic characters in this thing, lol.

And since Tamar is also heavily queercoded, our lovely ladies make off into the night, flirting. Or maybe not. Let me dream, though.

At least Blade Boy is aware that his tattoo is stupid. To quote someone ranting about him on tumblr: He’s embracing his identity as a tool.

Oh, boy, this will be fun.

Evil soldier is horny for Mal. Saints, is there a woman in this book who isn’t horny for Blade Boy?

And here comes Niki to save the day.

Chapter 6

Niki saved the day.

Fiberglass? And David being David. Genya being in love with her nerd of a boyfriend.

Jesus Christ, this one crazy kid has moved the technology in this universe a whole century on his own. So, when is David going to propose to him?

Baghra hasn’t changed much I see.

Baghra’s about to drop some truthbombs, but no, we have to be rudely interupted because Genya’s rapist is throwing a fit.

Chapter 7

How does Mal sound? Is she gonna say the Blade boy sounds like her dad? I mean, I know voices are partially genetic, but it has been tens of generations between them, probably.

So, we’re finally taking Genya’s trauma seriously after all this time? Good. Better late than never, I guess.

I wish that regicide was already finished and I’m pretty sure that Genya does, too. Stop defending the fucking king, narrative.

David’s a nerd in all things I see.

Someone please just kill the king already. And the queen, too, for good measure.

Now that’s a romance.

Infodumping and listening to said infodumps is a legitimate love language, Alina. Let them nerd out over poisons.

Wait, has Alina never directly killed anyone before? I thought she did... hmmm.

And just like that, it should have been over. Ugh.

Somehow, Baghra is a better teacher now than she was before. She half feels like a completely different character.

Nevermind, she’s back at it.

Chapter 8

Holy shit, Nadia and Tamar are canon. They have canon gays here.

So, which one of them is gonna die?

Chapter 9

We arrive at that scene. The one, where they should have fucked.

Jeez, girl, get a hold of yourself. Life is short, fuck a villain.

In other news, Genya and David definitelly fucked.

Chapter 10

Poor David. He just wanted to know.

Damn... I never realized just how young Baghra was, when she killed her sister.

I’ve already made a post about this, but it really does strike me like Baghra has already decided to end her life at this point in the book.

Why is that whole “but what if we’re related” thing even in there?

Chapter 11

We love a suprise attack.

When did Sasha boy learn that trick?

Baghra really just did that. Oh boy.

Chapter 12

No, don’t kill the kid... ugh.

Emotiona support cat. She should be friends with Milo.

Porrige for brains. Oof.

So Nadia was the one, who got bees set on her in the book. Cool.

That’s a good question. Why was it never brought up to Alina, that other Grisha get blocks, too?

David already thinking of steampunk prosthetic for Adrik is honestly kinda sweet.

Chapter 13

Back home... kinda.

Is that really... you really care about Mal bonking the Grisha school mean girl over a year ago? Okay.

Chapter 14

Angst! Yay!

And more angst.

Chapter 15

Sasha really went “My mom killed herself to save you? Well, I’ll kill the closest thing to parents you have.”

Chapter 16

Nikolai’s alive. Kinda.

And these two have such a sibling energy, I can’t.

And then they fuck. Ew.

Chapter 17

Wait, wait wait... so Alina isn’t even the one to destroy the Fold?

Okay. That’s... weird.

Holy shit. That was...

So, Aleksander is dead. Mal isn’t. Someone else destroyed the Fold for Alina and now she has no powers.

Okay.

That’s a weird-ass ending.

Chapter 18

The gays survived, so that’s nice.

Genya made good on her promise of making Alina a ginger, lol.

After

What emotion is this supposed to give me? Cause all I feel is kinda sad.

[4stars-uswnt]

Livestream Revelations [Christen Press x Reader]

requested by anon: Can you do a cute Christen Press Quarantine type of imagine? There could never be enough Pressy to go around hahaha. Thank youuu

requested by anon: Could you please write a cute quarantine interview/livestream with christen?

A/N: i agree! there def could never be enough cp to around...gosh i love that woman. also, this was one of my favs, so i hope you all enjoy it too! lemme know what u think :)

“Hey guys.” You smile into the camera, as you lean your phone against your water bottle. “We’re extremely bored, so we decided to come on here and answer some questions.”

You look over to your girlfriend, encouraging her to say something.

“(Y/N) practically forced me to do this.” Christen rolls her eyes, hiding a grin.

You playfully push her shoulder, laughing. “Don’t even lie, Chris. You love interacting with the fans, plus you were bored out of your mind.”

At that, Christen can only smirk, knowing you were right.

The two of you had been dating for almost four years now and lived together in an apartment in Seattle during the offseason. When COVID first hit, before lockdown was enforced, Christen quickly got on the first flight from Utah, so that the two of you could quarantine together. Now, almost 5 months later, the two of you were going slightly insane. Although you loved spending time with each other, especially considering the NWSL season often separated you two, not being able to go out was causing you to go a little stir crazy.

“Alright,” you clap your hands and scroll through the incoming comments, “let’s see what kind of questions you guys have.”

“Oh, there’s one.” Christen squints, pointing to one of the recurring questions. “How did the two of you meet?”

“Oh, this is a funny story.” You chuckle. “Well, we met in college, and we actually met in our Philosophy class before we even met on the team.”

Before you can continue to tell the story, Christen interrupts you, her cheeks flushed. “Nooooo. Please don’t tell this story. It’s so embarrassing.”

“Awww,” You coo, pinching her cheeks, “it was adorable, babe.”

Your girlfriend pouts and crosses her arms, as you start again. “So, basically, our professor had assigned seats, but Ms. Press over here didn’t know that. So, I go to sit in my seat only to find that someone else was sitting there, and I say to her, ‘I think you’re in my seat,’ and she looks up at me and said… what did you say to me?” You look over at your blushing girlfriend with a teasing glint in your eye.

Christen covers her face with her hands and mumbles out something.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” You lean in closer.

The older forward removes her hands. “I said, ‘Your seat? This can be your seat if you give me your number.”

At that, you throw your head back and burst out laughing. Looking back at your phone, you see a flood of comments from many of your national team teammates.

“Ha! Megan said, ‘That doesn’t sound like the Pressy I know.’” You turn back to your girlfriend and poke her side. “Yeah, that was a pretty bold move for you.”

“I thought you were beautiful, and I didn’t know if I’d see you again, so I thought, why not?” Christen shrugs.

“Awwww, babe. You thought I was beautiful?” You give her a wet kiss on her cheek.

“You still are.” She grumbles, wiping her face. You feel your cheeks warm and your heart melt, and you give her a quick kiss.

“Love you.”

“Love you too.” Christen responds, before looking at the incoming questions. “Hmmm, okay, next question. Let’s see… oh, here’s one: (Y/N), what’s your favorite thing about me?”

“Is that really a question, or do you just want me to boost your ego?” You raise your eyebrow skeptically.

“It’s an actual question!” Christen insists, gesturing to the phone.

You breathe out a laugh. “Okay, uhhhhh, do you mean like favorite physical feature or favorite personality trait…?” You trail off, and Christen slaps your shoulder.

“Stop stalling!”

“Alright, alright.” You throw your hands up in innocence. “Well, I’ll just answer both. My favorite physical feature of my gorgeous girlfriend would have to be her smile. It literally just lights up my entire world and is just so infectious.”

As you answer, a wide smile breaks out on your girlfriend’s face.

“See what I mean.” You find yourself grinning, fondly admiring the woman you love. “And, my favorite personality trait of Christen would have to be… hmmm, this one is difficult because I just love everything about her.” You honestly admit.

“Aw, babe, I love you, too.” Christen’s face softens, and she pulls you in for a tender kiss. “But answer the question.”

“Ahhh, okay!” You chuckle. It takes you a couple of seconds to come up with a succinct answer, but you finally find the words to an answer. “I wouldn’t say that I have a favorite trait, but one thing that I appreciate about Christen is her huge heart. She is just so compassionate and caring for everyone around her, and she’s so selfless, just always giving. She has so much love in her heart, and I’m just so lucky that she’s shared some with me.”

Your voice cracks at the end, as you start getting a little emotional, and you can see Christen discreetly wiping her eyes.

Clearing your throat, you look back at the comments, and you smile, as the forward mouths an ‘I love you.’

By now, there are many comments from fans saying ‘They’re so cute!’ or ‘MY SHIP’ or even ‘my heart can’t take this.’ You scroll through them and spot a few from your teammates.

mrapinoe: This is so gay

mrapinoe: I love it

tobinheath: You guys are so cute!

ashlynharris24: Wow, who knew (Y/N) could be so romantic

kelleyohara: C’mon dude answer my question!!!!

You let out a small laugh at your best friend’s comment. “What’s your question, Kel?”

You and Christen wait a couple of seconds for the defender to type out her question. Amidst the hundreds comments, you finally see Kelley’s name pop up again. 

“Kelley says, ‘(Y/N), is it true that you had a crush on someone while at Stanford?’” Christen reads from the screen, before turning to glare at you.

You cringe under the scrutiny of your girlfriend. “Wow, Kel, are you trying to get me in trouble?” You mutter out.

“Answer the question, (Y/N).” Christen pushes, jealousy seeping through her voice. Throughout your time at Stanford, the two of you had been best friends, telling each other everything, but Christen had never been aware of any crush you’d had.

“Ummm… well there was this one girl that I really liked.” You trail off, avoiding your girlfriend’s eyes.

“Really?” Christen raises her eyebrow at you.

“Yeah, but I was too nervous to do anything about it.” You shrug, not wanting to elaborate anymore, but the forward wasn’t going to let you off the hook that easily.

“Who was it? Do I know her?”

“Chris, it’s not that big of a deal. This was like ten years ago.”

“Was it Ali? Morgan? Lea? Oh my gosh, was it Kelley?” Christen interrogates, as you shake your head to each of them.

“Ew, Chris, you think I had a crush on Kelley. She’s like my sister!” You gag at the mental image.

“Well, then who was it?” She wines.

“It was you.” You admit. Although the two of you met at Stanford, and Christen so boldly asked for your number, you hadn’t started dating until four years ago, as neither of you wanted to ruin your friendship.

“What?” Christen’s eyes widen.

“I had a huge crush on you when we were in college. From the moment that you were sitting in my seat, I knew you were the one, as cheesy as that sounds. And as we spent more time together, on and off the pitch, my feelings grew stronger and stronger, but I didn’t know if you felt the same, so I never told you. I didn’t want to lose you as a friend.” You reveal, rambling on.

“Seriously?” Christen whispers, and you nod.

“Dead serious, babe.”

Not knowing what to say, your girlfriend cups your face and brings you in for a sweet kiss.

Before the kiss could get too heated on camera, Christen pulls away. “By the way, I had a little crush on you in college as well.”

“Hm, really?” You smirk.

“Mhm.”

“Well, we ended up together in the end, didn’t we?” You brush a hair out of her face.

“Yup, I always had a feeling we would.” Christen playfully boasts.

“Okay there, Delphi.” You joke, as your girlfriend pushes you away, calling you a nerd.

“Well, alright you guys, I think that we’re gonna end this livestream right now because we’re not too bored anymore, or at least I found something else to do.” You wiggle your brows at Christen, smirking.

“(Y/N)!” Christen slaps your shoulder.

ashlynharris24: Get it (Y/N)!!!

alexmorgan13: Real smooth (Y/N/N)

allie_long_: 🔥🔥🥵

“See you all later!” You wave at the camera and end the stream.

After you shutting off your phone and tossing it on the couch, you turn to your girlfriend. “So now what?”

“Well, all of a sudden I’m not that bored, and I think we have some lost time to make up for.” Christen sings, looking over her shoulder, as she makes her way towards the bedroom. “You coming?”

“Gosh, I love you, Christen Press.” You grin, before scrambling off your chair and following your girlfriend into your bedroom.

[sage-nebula]

Hmmm... "tfw ur evil mom doesnt like ur bf"

Despite the glib file name I gave it, this one is actually pretty serious.

This one takes place in my Paradigm Shift AU, which is an AU in which not only was Keith raised in space, and not only did he join Team Lotor, but he and the rest of Team Lotor (or Team Revolutionary as I call this version of them) became the Paladins of Voltron and are fighting a revolution against the Empire. More specifically, this WIP was an AU of my AU, and more specifically still it's a, "what if Haggar controlled Narti in Paradigm Shift the same way she did in canon? What if the Narti Incident still happened?" After I considered the question I couldn't get it out of my head, so I had to write it down—or at least start to write it down, before I got distracted by other things.

TL;DR: Haggar uses Narti to spy (against Narti's will), and Lotor (in a moment of trauma-induced panic) tries to kill her as in canon, only to be stopped by Keith . . . and things get worse from there. Narti does end up escaping (nothing but unrefrigerated women in my AU), but Team Revolutionary is pretty badly fractured as a result of what Haggar makes her do after Keith intervenes, how Lotor reacts to what she does, how Ezor reacts to how Lotor reacts to what she does, and all the emotional fallout that comes with it.

I actually had quite a bit written, so I'll give multiple snippets:

So one Sincline ship was necessary, absolutely, but Lotor had ordered the construction of four more with the remainder of the comet they had secured from an alternate reality. At first, Acxa hadn’t understood why. They had their Lions, and while she couldn’t speak for Zethrid, Ezor, or Narti, Acxa herself was pretty attached to Red. She didn’t want to trade for a Sincline ship. But Lotor had, when she had questioned him, pointed out the fact that they would not be able to pilot Voltron forever. Eventually, they would die or move on to other things. And when they did, and Voltron passed into other hands, it may be necessary to have a check on its power, just in case.

“At present, the Sincline ships are the only ships in the known universe with a hope of meeting Voltron in a fair fight,” he had said. “They will only be five ships, one per Lion, when completed, but that is still five more ships than the universe had before.”

“But we have them,” Ezor had said, “so aren’t we just making a check on ourselves?”

“We have them now,” Lotor had said, a little smile playing at his lips, “but we need not have them forever. Nothing is eternal, Ezor.”

With that decided, construction had progressed on the remaining four. Acxa had to say, they were impressive. While she still felt a strong attachment to Red that she wasn’t willing to break, the Sincline ships gleamed in the light of their hangar, and their cockpits had a soft scent that was comforting and welcoming at once (“New ship smell,” Keith had called it, and Acxa wasn’t so sure about that, but she also couldn’t think of anything to counter it). The third ship was about halfway complete; between the mechanics they had recruited and the droids they had built for this purpose, construction was coming along at a brisk pace, and so Lotor’s smile as the six of them watched its progress from the doorway of the hangar was (in Acxa’s opinion) completely warranted.

“At this rate, we should be able to begin testing on the third ship within the next few months,” Lotor said, his voice raised a little to be heard over the sound of the ore being soldered. “Acxa, have you checked the calibration and pilot test results from the second ship?”

“Yes,” Acxa said. “Calibration of the second ship is complete, and it passed all other tests with no errors. It’s in perfect form.”

“Excellent.”

Lotor cast one last satisfied look at the half-completed third ship before he turned and left the hangar, the rest of them turning to follow suit. Well, most of the rest of them; Keith alone lingered for just a moment more, smiling a little as he looked back at the ship, but when he turned and caught Acxa watching him, his smile fell.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Acxa said, and though she resisted the urge to roll her eyes, she couldn’t keep a little smile off her own lips as she followed after Lotor, Ezor, Narti, and Zethrid down the corridor. “Attached already, are you?”

“I like ships,” Keith said, a little defensively as he fell into step beside her. “That’s all.”

“I know,” Acxa said. But though it was childish of her, and though there was no reason to rile him over being excited at the construction of the Sincline ships, she still couldn’t stop herself from adding, “Nerd,” under her breath.

She glanced at him in time to see him roll his eyes, but he was smiling a little again as he stepped to the side to knock his shoulder against hers in a playful bump, and that made her own smile grow.

[. . .]

It had been six weeks since an agent of the Blade named Ulaz had infiltrated the castleship looking for someone named Shiro—six weeks since Keith saw a symbol on Ulaz’s weapon that he thought looked vaguely familiar, and six weeks since Ulaz had looked at Keith with an expression caught somewhere between joy and heartache, like he knew him, somehow, but couldn’t acknowledge that even to himself. Ulaz had given them the coordinates to one of the Blade of Marmora’s bases, and had urged them to go there as soon as possible. Keith wanted to; it was obvious that was what he wanted without him having to say it. But he had said it after Ulaz had left them, his jaw set and his eyes burning holes into the floor as he spoke privately to Acxa and Lotor.

“I think I . . . there was something kind of . . . familiar about him. Like I knew him, maybe. And he—there was something he said, before he died, that made it seem like maybe he knew me, too. And I don’t know how, or why, but . . . maybe if I meet with the Blade like he said, I’ll figure it out.”

The logic was sound. It made sense. And it was something, Acxa knew, that Keith was fixated on, even if he didn’t bring it up regularly. But though Ulaz had infiltrated the castle six weeks ago, they had yet to trace the coordinates he had given them to visit the Blade of Marmora’s hidden base. Their delay was justified; there was always more work to be done. But all things considered, Acxa felt there was a good chance Lotor was delaying their visit on purpose.

Acxa glanced sidelong at the frown Keith was sending Zethrid’s way before she faced forward again.

It was selfish of Lotor if that was the case, but if she was honest with herself, Acxa couldn’t say she didn’t understand.

[. . .]

By now they had reached the base of the stairs leading up to another floor (there being too many of them to all cram into the elevator), and whatever had hit the castle did so with enough force to tilt it briefly up on its side. Ezor flailed and grabbed the banister, while Acxa was thrown sideways into Keith, who stumbled and barely kept his balance as she was thrown into him. Narti spread her arms and straightened her tail to keep her balance, Kova digging his claws into her shoulder, while Zethrid grabbed the other banister and Lotor was nearly thrown back off the stairs he had just started climbing. The attack (because Acxa didn’t know what else it could be) was powerful enough to cause the castleship to tremble with aftershocks even after the blow ceased; and as they all stood up, Ezor looked at the rest of them with wide eyes.

“What was—?”

The security alarms blared to life, drowning out Ezor’s voice and causing Kova to leap off Narti’s shoulder with a startled, angry yowl. In lieu of answering Ezor, Lotor tapped the communicator on his wrist, and as soon as the hologram screen flared to life above it, snapped, “Bridge, report! What’s happening?!”

“We’re being attacked by Empire fleets!” Dune, a member of Auxiliary Team One, cried. “Two, three—at least three of them, from different ang—!”

Another attack crashed into the ship, this time from the opposite side. Acxa caught herself against the wall, and held out her other hand to brace Keith was he was nearly thrown into her. Ezor and Zethrid were gripping the stairway banisters for dear life.

“Use Keith’s console to raise the particle barrier,” Lotor ordered. “We’ll be there momentarily.”

“On it!”

Dune’s voice had already been a crackle through Lotor’s communicator, but her response was even more clipped than normal as Lotor cut the communication in a sharp snap before he turned to head up the stairs again. Acxa and the others immediately hastened to follow suit, Kova climbing up Narti’s back to cling to her shoulder again, yet even as the lot of them sprinted up the staircase, Keith took the stairs two at a time to match Lotor’s strides.

“Lions?” he asked, and before Lotor had time to answer, added, “It’d be faster if we doubled back instead of going all the way to the bridge. We can get to the Lions through the Sincline hangar.”

“No,” Lotor said, and perhaps sensing the rebuttal in Keith’s frown, explained, “If we’re being attacked by this many fleets it wouldn’t be wise to counter. We’re better served using a wormhole to relocate until we can better plan our next move.”

“But how did they find us?” Acxa demanded. “Even if we leave, if we don’t know how they found us in the first place—”

“We had to have been tracked,” Zethrid said, and though Acxa agreed, that didn’t ease the knot in her throat, or the fists her fingers instinctively curled in.

“But how?” Ezor asked, a nervous frown on her lips. “Last time we were tracked by those other reality Paladins, right? By their Lions?”

“But they left a while ago,” Keith said, “and Dune didn’t say Zarkon was here. She would have mentioned it if he was.”

“If she knows what’s good for her, anyway,” Zethrid said.

“Then how did the Empire find us now?” Ezor asked. “If it wasn’t the other reality Paladins and their Lions, then what? How were we tracked?”

Lotor hadn’t broken stride the entire time they climbed the staircase. He hadn’t offered his own input, nor had he shown any indication that he heard their conversation at all. Yet as he reached the second floor he slowed, and finally came to a full stop just as Narti made it to the top of the stairs. Ezor and Zethrid, who had managed to pull ahead of him in the mad sprint up the staircase, noticed and stopped as well, both turning to look back.

“What is it?” Acxa asked.

Lotor didn’t answer her. He gave no indication to show that he even registered that she was talking to him. She was near enough to him so that she could see his profile, and while she couldn’t say why, exactly, what she saw was enough to make ice take up root in her chest. Lotor was staring at the floor, his jaw clenched. His hand was resting on the hilt of his sword. Acxa opened her mouth to call out to him again, yet thought better of it in the next tick. She looked over to Keith instead.

But for once, Keith didn’t return her glance. Instead, he was watching Lotor. His eyes were narrowed, his lips tugged in a sharp frown. And slowly—so slowly that Acxa almost didn’t catch it—he palmed and raised the Black Bayard so it was level with his waist.

Acxa restrained the impulse to reach for her Bayard in turn.

The moment, which felt like hours even though it could have only been a few seconds, ended with the ferocity of a lightning strike. Lotor whipped around as though a bolt had gone through him, his eyes wild, bright, and locked on Narti. In the next tick he threw himself forward, his sword clearing its scabbard as he brought it up in a high arc—

And a ring of steel upon rift ore echoed in the corridor as his blade clashed against Keith’s, Keith having thrown himself between Lotor and Narti like a living shield.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Keith demanded. He pushed back, knocking Lotor’s sword up and away, yet though Lotor took a step back, the wild look in his eyes didn’t fade.

“Keith,” Lotor said through a clenched jaw, “move.”

“No. We’re supposed to be under attack from the Empire, not each other,” Keith snapped. “What’s your problem?”

Lotor was gripping his sword so hard his arm was shaking. “You don’t understand—”

“I don’t think anyone could understand why you wou—” Keith froze mid-sentence, and glanced back over his shoulder. “What—?”

Keith’s voice broke, not in a yelp, but in a gasp as his spine arched and he jerked forward.

“Keith!” Acxa said, as both Ezor and Zethrid came closer. “What—?”

Her question died in her throat.

Narti had grabbed Keith. She had grabbed his arm for support, Acxa thought—had thought. She had grabbed him to give him support through whatever spasm had suddenly seized him. But the spasm wasn’t caused by anything to do with him. Three long, claw-like blades crafted from rift ore protruded through the front of Keith’s Paladin armor, dripping with his blood. They had been driven straight through, and Acxa recognized them. They all did. They were Narti’s blades, from her Bayard, as it took the same shape it always did for her. She had run them straight through Keith’s back, pushing them through until they cut open his stomach with three, evenly spaced wounds.

The one prolonged, solitary moment in which everything seemed frozen while they all processed what happened broke. Narti pushed Keith forward, and in the same moment pulled her blades out of his back. They retracted back into her Bayard with their customary shing-click as Keith—his eyes glazed even as they fluttered shut—collapsed. Lotor lurched forward, knees bent in a crouch, to catch him; his arm looped around Keith’s waist to support him as Keith sagged, limp and unresponsive, against his chest. The Black Bayard fell from Keith’s now slack grip and hit the floor with a clatter, but Lotor did not release his own weapon even as he wrapped his other arm across Keith’s back in a secure, though gentle, embrace.

Lotor’s expression was stricken, his voice strangled as he choked out, “Keith—”

The castle gave another lurch as something rammed against—it, Acxa supposed, or against the particle barrier—and though it was sudden, disruptive, and violent enough to cause them all to stumble once again, it was also enough of a shock to break through the lock her mind had slammed down in an effort to reject what had just happened. She didn’t—she didn’t want to accept it, but there Keith was, bleeding out—bleeding out in Lotor’s arms, and—

The shock, the reminder that they were under attack—it was all Lotor needed, too.

Acxa was only awarded a glimpse of his face—one tick to see not the rage, but the hatred in his eyes—before he jumped over Keith and threw himself at Narti, bringing his sword down in a vicious arc. He missed; Narti leaped backwards and hit the center of the staircase in a back handspring that allowed her to flip the rest of the way down.

Lotor wasn’t deterred. He didn’t hesitate for a heartbeat as he tore down the staircase after her. And Ezor, her eyes wide as she realized everything that was happening—

“No . . . Lotor, no!”

—she, too, sprinted right by Keith and took off after.

Ezor was chasing Lotor, who was chasing Narti, who was trying to escape, but Acxa had no time for any of them. She didn’t register when she hit her knees by Keith’s side, or even what she was going to do as she grasped Keith’s shoulders to try to pull him up, but the moment she realized what she was doing—as the reality of the situation kicked in, and she fought against the urge to kick herself for not taking command of the situation sooner, before it reached this point—she said, “Zethrid!”

“Yup.”

Acxa stood and stumbled backward as Zethrid swept forward and easily hauled Keith up off the floor.

[sirthisisa-wendys]

Since takeomi's the 'god of war'

I've been associating the 1st gen to greek/roman gods

Wakasa: more of a hermes bc of his fighting style, i can see him wearing winged sandals

Benkei: HEPHAESTUS just not deformed (bc he's perfect) I see him very strong and would be a blacksmith in a fantasy au . Vulcan really fits him (also volcanoes and keizo work well together idk why-)

Shinichiro: im not sure he gives Apollo vibes and dionysus vibes.

Also apollo and him have the same luck in lovers-

I wanna hear your thoughts-

Whoa! Thought I answered this, but it turns out a friend and I had a deep discussion about it instead lol

Okay SO - *claps hands together* I'm a mythology nerd and this is hitting some sweet spots so here we go. It's gonna be long winded.

God of War/ Ares - Takeomi

I suppose this would be an interesting pairing. Based on the name alone, I would be inclined to think the same! However, it appears Takeomi is *strategic* about his warfare. That would land him in the Athena category, although his recent actions kind of make me think... Yeah, he's a bit of a brash actor. Maybe he could even be the emotional Poseidon! Idk, thoughts are coming quickly. Must. Type. Faster.

BUT

If Takeomi is Ares and Keizo is Hephaestus - there's a bit of a problem there.

remember how Ares and Aphrodite are all "opposites attract"?

And how Hephaestus is her husband because she was given to him by the gods?

But then she went and decided to have an affair with Ares, and they were CAUGHT IN THE ACT, SO BIG MAN MINDS HIS BUSINESS ON HIS PROPERTY BECAUSE HE FELT EMBARRASSED?

I would leave that out, but send me a blacksmith Benkei any day. He can sharpen-- wait, no. That's not right. He can forge his sword-- No. That's not it either.

He can... do something with those big, manly muscles and just break me in half.

NEXT! ONE!

waka, waka, waka.

Hermes is a very interesting choice! But the only thing about Hermes is that he can't mind his own business, and Waka seems like a "no gossip zone" type of guy at the present. He might be a gossip queen, but there isn't enough characterization for me to play off of.

At first glance, waka seems to be Proteus, a mythical person who would assume all sorts of shapes and things to escape from the people who wished to find out things he knew.

But he's also freaking fAsT so... hmmm. Even Aeolus could count since he's the keeper of winds and is quick-footed.

Shinichiro as Apollo...

Apollo...

Lore Olympus aside, Apollo's love affairs never went well. But considering his whole character, he seems like more of a Zeus (minus the strength part since he's always getting beat up). He conquered the whole Kanto region then called it quits. CALLED IT QUITS!

Benevolent, masterful, likes women a lot, but can also do as he sees fit and no one really questions him on it.

Let me know what your counter-counter thoughts are! i love hearing from you!

[dex-xe]

BBC Ghosts x Eurovision

No one asked for this (and I’ve already seen a few people discussing this but haven’t seen anyone go into much detail) but here are some headcanons about the ghosts watching Eurovision 2021!! Eurovision has been one of my special interests since I was a little kid so combining it with my current special interest just seems right!!

(Also pls comment your own headcanons or even better send them to my inbox AND also send new headcanon topics for us to chat about cause I’ve missed doing that!!)

- Firstly it’s definitely Mike’s doing,, Alison jokes it’s a bit tacky and kinda cringe and Mike is *deeply* offended insisting the tack is what makes it fun.

- Alison also really enjoys it but also enjoys teasing Mike about his affinity

- Alison shows the ghosts a few YouTube clips of old years

- Kitty, Mary, and Humphrey are all well up for watching straight away,, also Pat but we’ll talk about him in a minute.

- Robin doesn’t really get the point (countries are a stupid idea according to him so having a country based competition where people actually get serious about it is just daft).

- Thomas and Fanny both hate the clips they’re shown and call it the “lowest form of entertainment” they’ve ever seen.

- The Captain is also above it... or so he says but he finds his foot tapping along to Emmilie De Forest and is *horrified* at himself

- Julian is straight away racist,, a comment here about EU bureaucracy, another snipe there about Russia. Alison shuts his complaining down very quickly and tells him he can’t say anything he wouldn’t be happy someone saying about the UK or else his phone privileges will be taken away.

- Pat is the only ghost who has seen Eurovision before (Julian has always refused on principle).

- He used to watch it with his family and put on a proper spread for everyone (cause we all know Pat was the family cook). I’m talking mini sausage rolls, tiny sandwiches, a cheese and pineapple hedgehog (totally not what my family does for Eurovision every year... hmmm) and then also a trifle cause it’s the most English pudding ever and you gotta support the home side.

- (I’m hungry,, can you tell??)

- Once Alison has explained to them how the show works, most of them agree to watch - Thomas once he learns of the beautiful women competing and Fanny the same with the men.

- The Captain however begins taking it very seriously once he starts to realise the tactical elements of it,, while he likes the performances, he spends the entire afternoon rewatching previous years scoring segments making mental notes of what gets support and who votes for who.

- The evening comes round and everyone gathers to watch in the TV room.

- The second the flag parade starts everyone is engrossed - even Fanny can marvel at the spectacle of it.

- (I’m not gonna talk about every performance cause Jeez that’s long but here are what I think everyone’s favourites would be.

- Robin really loves Finland and Italy,, anything loud and rocky he’s straight up off the floor and jumping along (same Robin, same) but he falls completely silent and watches in awe at the Spanish entry because of the giant moon (he then also asks Alison to buy a huge moon for the living room - she’s says she’ll think about it).

- Kitty is fully rooting for Malta - Lizzo girlboss vibes is what Kitty lives for. It’s also helped that Alison expressed quite an interest for that one as well.

- Thomas is expecting to like the pretty girls but absolutely falls for Switzerland straight away. Curly haired, blouse-wearing emotional guy with incredibly dramatic dancing is just 😍😍 for him (same Thomas,, can’t decide if he’s very attractive or if it’s gender envy or what??).

- Julian supports the UK... he thinks the song is shit but cannot bring himself to compliment anyone else.

- Pat is an Iceland kind of guy (ily dadi,, you were robbed #eurovision2020winners) and he fully finds himself trying to dance along, smiling all the way through their performance. He likes the weirder ones,, the ones were everyone is clearly just having a blast.

- Humphrey likes the emotional ones,, Bulgaria is a favourite. Righttttt up until France - he picked up a little French from his wife, enough to figure out what Barbara’s talking about and is just in tears by the end.

- Mary actually finds herself enjoying the more folky, traditionally European ones. This comes back to my Morris/folk dancing Mary so I feel like she’d appreciate like Ukraine and Russia - also for the like strong woman aesthetic.

- Fanny is abhorred by the outfits and music but does join Julian in his reluctant support of the UK, she instead prefers to mutter her abuses of the skimpy outfits to the Captain.

- The Captain is also drawn in by the emotional ones like Humphrey, specifically France again. However, a shaggy and shirtless Damiano David jumping about the place in eyeliner and tight trousers awakens something in him he didn’t know was there. He’s horrified by the group and the loudness and the outfits and everything but is also very much intrigued in a way that disturbs him.

- Mike also likes Italy quite a bit cause he’s an Arctic Monkeys/Killers kinda guy (he is,, don’t @ me cause me tooooo Mike) and Alison tends to agree with him but also, like I said, agrees with Kitty on the girl power ones.

- Once the scoring starts, the ghosts start getting noisier and talking amongst themselves about the acts and who they would vote for (they’re not allowed to vote cause Alison refuses to pay for her dead housemates to get a vote each).

- The Captain edges closer to the TV as the others talk over his beloved scoring system, completed overshadowing the research the Captain has done.

- It ends with the Captain sat cross legged in front of the TV with Humphrey in his lap explaining precisely what was happening to Humphrey.

- When it gets towards the end everyone hushes up and they all watch as Italy win. Most of them celebrate.

- Fanny is greatly disturbed by the winners and laments the state of music these days. The Captain vocally agrees but also can’t draw his eyes from the screen.

- Julian has some very choice words for the public for giving the UK a big fat 0.

- Kitty says she’s just glad that everyone had a good time and enjoyed their performances. She also wishes that she could go to the show (don’t we all).

But yeah that’s my collection of headcanons for Eurovision,, once again proving I am a massive nerd who spends too much time putting together little stories.

Anyway,, if you have any more Eurovision headcanons feel free to comment them or send them to my inbox so I can reply and add to them. Similarly, if you have any other shows/music/events/literally anything that you think I should make ghosts headcanons for or that you have hcs for then send them over to my inbox as well!! Love yall stay safe, drink some water if you’ve managed to read this far :)