#and i wanna see my cousins
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#i tend not to feel childhood nostalgia that much (mainly for 🏳️⚧️ reasons nothing bad i just don���t wanna be a girl again)#but i want to be in vermont rn so so so bad#put me in a tent under the stars#let me be next to a campfire and someone’s playing harmonica softly and my grandfather’s telling cool stories from when he was a game warde#and i wanna go fishing out on a reservoir in a canoe and catch a 2 ft long fish (true story actually)#but it’s not just the camping i wanna be with my family i wanna be in my grandparents house with their woodstove#and i wanna sleep in the guest room that’s been mine since before i can remember#and i wanna see my cousins#luckily i’m going to vermont next week and i’m meeting my new cousin (!!)#but we’re not camping in the same spot we normally do#it should be good tho#i’m really excited#i get vermont-sick like every six months it’s a problem 😭
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ok there was a poll going around a while ago about whether you think your 5-year-old self would recognize you, and I'm curious:
#polls#poll#heavily encouraging people to elaborate in the tags lol i wanna hear everyones thoughts#i'll start: i'm genuinely not sure#was looking at old photos and... i look really different#there's a photo of me and my brother and one of our cousins and like#we're all in our 20s now and idk if any of us is recognizable lmao#i didnt see that cousin at all from like when he was 13ish to when he was 18ish and i don't think i would have recognized him#i think meeting current me without context would be REALLY uncanny valley for 16-year-old me but idk if he'd catch on#did i know what i looked like well enough to recognize myself?#ahgsdlkkdh if it was fall or winter he might guess just based on clothes. i still wear the same style of button up/sweater combo#it's very Me in a way that i would have instantly clocked. at least in a 'oh nice i'd wear that' way lol#and the fact that we'd be the Same Exact Height would also help#mannerisms and smile and hands and things are the same more than my face is. hence uncanny valley#there's a photo of my dad when he was like 19 where when i saw it i was like ?!??! because he looks like me#he's significantly taller and his face is different and it's just a still image but something about the way he's sitting in the picture#i do that. my posture looks like that.#i think it would feel like that#but the ways in which i look different are like... i'm not sure they're things 16-year-old me would be able to grasp as Possible for him#he knew he was trans but even so#i didn't quite look like i'd figured out how to be a person yet#would pinocchio recognize himself as a Real Boy?#there are a lot of details you can't picture beforehand#idk. but that's my ramble over#personal
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might be going home this summer ya rab inshallah 🙏
#i've never crossed the border by myself but if i do go then it'll be the first time alone#but oughhhh i wanna see my cousins and i wanna eat good shawarma and i want to skate the streets of nablus#and i wanna tan in ariha and i wanna pray in al aqsa and i wanna eat street corn in ramallah#and i wanna eat knafeh and maqloubeh and olives and bask in the sun on my homeland
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things get better. my best friend in the world got top surgery after us talking about it for years. i'm getting mine next year. i have genuine friends now who teach me everyday what love looks like. love looks like going to an arcade and talking for hours at the bar instead. love looks like planning road trips to our hometowns. love looks like choosing our regalia colors together. love looks like learning our language. love looks like compression binders. love looks like top surgery scars. love looks like sweet grass tattoos.
things get better.
#i just remember being a kid and trying to picture my future and coming up blank#never thought I'd have friends who invitr me to shows and genuinely excited to introduce me#I've got this great friend i met at work and she's so fucking awesome!#the exact girl I'd see as a kid and was like god i wanna know her i wanna be her friend#and everytime we talk it's like light casting both ways#im so thankful for my family#im so thankful for my uncle who tells me so many funny stories#for all the endless conversations. for teaching me about our people. telling me about where we come from. feeding me spaghetti after sweat#holding my earrings at the powwow. im thankful for my cousins and their loud beautiful laughter#and for finally fucking accepting that my parents not wanting to be apart of my life doesn't mean I can't live it#wado to friends and family#and actually looking forward to the future now ❤️#vent
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dan and phil are like jesus in that they’re dramatic ass fruity men in their 30s always going like “i am making this SACRIFICE for THE PEOPLE” and everyone is like “no one asked you to do this in fact we’d all rather you just did not do this” and they’re like “IT IS TOO LATE NOW YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED” and we’re like “no no we didn’t want this actually and you made this decision with your whole ass adult brain you truly could have just not done this and we’d all be better off for it but now we all have to suffer because YOU refuse to say no to shit” and i think that’s ridiculous stupid annoying awful beautiful
#/j#dnp#jesus did NOT have to die on the cross like pilate gave him so many outs and he was like ‘noooo i have to be a martyr’ and that’s#why pilate washed is hands of him#he’s like ‘this bitch is too messy i don’t wanna be involved’#good for him#dan and phil#‘oh we HAVE to do this thing for this sponsor oh we HAVE to do this really gay embarrassing coupley thing on the gaming channel’#i swear someday they’ll be like ‘this video is sponsored by dragon city so we’re gonna be doing the chapstick challenge!!’#‘can’t believe you guys and dragon city and the whole world literally begged and forced us to make out for a video but here we go 🙄🤣’#if i ever saw that shit in a video i would immediately click off unsubscribe block them report them delete my youtube account#move change my name get a fake id go off the grid and try to start over somewhere else#i know there are some of you freaks who actually wanna see them kiss but seeing that is genuinely my biggest fear lmao#like gross rosa those are our dads#actually dan feels like my cousin and phil feels like my cousin’s husband if that makes sense#i was 16 when i started watching so they didn’t really raise me maybe that’s why#dan howell#daniel howell#phan#amazingphil#phil lester#danisnotonfire#yeet my deenp#yeet my deet#danandphilgames#d&p#dip and pip#hbdnell
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All right, the first of many polls! I’m gonna do the kids in chronological order, as in the order the kids were born in. I’m not gonna reveal what the answer is when the time is up on the poll, I’m rather going to wait until I’ve done all the kids and reveal them all at once!
First up is Valerie. She’s the oldest of all the kids consecutively, and she’s a Nekton.
I’m gonna give people a week on this because I know everyone’s on here at different times and most won’t immediately see this. Please feel free to give the reasoning behind your guess, I’m genuinely curious to see what people think and what their reasoning is behind who they think each kiddo belongs to!
#I will not be answering any guesses#as I don’t want to potentially give anything away on accident#I have also given vague context clues throughout all my drawings about who may be related to who#for example: Jackson and Kai aren’t siblings. they’re cousins#little things like that. in how I word things and such#some kids might be easier to guess than others just through the way they look or act#but I still wanna see people guess!#the deep 2015#the deep cartoon#the deep oc#the deep next gen
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If SWK and MK come from the same stone, does that mean they are brothers? I don't know how others would see it though.
i think that all depends on the audience (and if i’m being honest, i hope that canon doesn’t clarify it precisely bc the fandom discourse will be insufferable 🙄 and i am so sick of THAT type of discourse)
are they brothers? if that fits with how their dynamic works for you, then sure! it makes sense when they do share the same egg, but also can we really place that as the distinction?
personally, SWK and MK’s dynamic to me reads like mentor/pupil that borders the line of familial (but what are those familial lines to me??? it is so vague, bestie if i’m being honest. sometimes i view them as brothers with an age gap. sometimes it’s uncle/nephew, and sometimes it’s grandpa/grandchild). i wouldn’t call their relationship brotherly the same way i would argue for the royalty duo. it’s just an unlabeled type of found family to me, ya know?
but canon-wise? well it has the mentor/pupil but also shows how they blur the lines into a friendship by s2. and then we have s4 teasing about SWK being MK’s possible dad (and why the teasing? well, the story is playing in the same assumptions audience members made: swk is a monkey, MK has monkey powers, they share similar enemies, and then you have the stone egg). but then the season ends leaving the connection between MK and SWK still vague while re-establishing the father/son with Pigsy and MK (and strengthening it in s5 bless)
AND THEN!!! S5 begins with SWK and MK finding their stone (i believe it was SWK who said “our stone” if my context clues are working) and even after MK’s origins are revealed, there still isn’t a solid confirmation on the familial aspect between SWK and MK but there is a connection. but i have no idea what the characters were saying, idk if they made any of that clear in s5
anyway, short answer: SWK and MK coming from the same stone does not need to mean they are brothers. it can be if you want it to even after lmk canon confirms or denies it. my personal interpretation is more blurry than brothers but to each their own
#sorry if my explanation was unclear#wasn’t able to write this in one sitting#anyway#what i’m trying to say is that same stone does not necessarily mean they are brothers#it could be how you understand it and i get that#personally MK and SWK coming from the same stone just means to me that they are celestial monkeys#tho MK’s was purposefully messed up#also: why tf did Mr Nine crack MK’s stone#we see in s5 anyway inserts MK’s creation in it but then in a later episode it’s revealed that Nine dude cracks it#(which also means he’s been playing as one of the Ten Kings for some time. how long??? idk i wish we were given a solid timeline T^T)#tbh the best explanation i can say is that swk and MK are cousin coded if we wanna go with ‘family tree’ understanding#but that also isn’t my full idea of their dynamic. i’m sorry it’s hard for me to explain rn :/#lmk#asks#lmk sun wukong#lmk mk#sunburst duo#lmk sunburst duo#lmk season 5#lmk s5#lmk spoilers#lmk s5 spoilers#lmk season 5 spoilers
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Finished my new Pokemon sona ref!!
Also I’ve solidified my role in the series!! My first appearance is in BW and then I’m in every game in the main series after that. The player will meet me at some point towards the beginning of the game, probably some time after the second gym. I’ll introduce myself and tell them that I’m a researcher studying the region’s legends. Then, the player will just encounter me in random points of the region throughout their journey. I’ll give them a random fact about the legendaries or something related to how the Pokemon interact with the humans in the region.
Perhaps there’s also a secret battle with me unlocked after meeting me in all my locations? That could be cool!! I always like the idea of being a secret boss :D
#art tag#pokemon#pokemon oc#sonas tag#trail mix#misc cc#regalia when hes being clingy <3#fairy is always clinging to me but regalia is usually a bit more reserved#i love my pokemon <3<3<3#also it would probably be revealed from other characters my relation to clay rather than me#like i imagine an npc in driftveil asking (after the player beats clay) if the player has met ‘the prince’#and that ‘the prince is even tougher than the boss’#and perhaps in scarvi lacey would mention something about her cousin being in the region and hoping he comes to see her#i just think it would be fun for the player to have to piece together who im connected to and how#ooouuuuggggg i wanna meet laceyyyyy i am suddenly overcome with the desire to draw us as litol kids………………………….
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booktok and it’s consequences
#last year when icebreaker was trending#my. what months was this. i dont even RECALL#my 11/12 year old cousin asked me to buy her icebreaker#i said for what bc she doesn’t even fucking READ like that for me to get her a book#and she tells me#bc i wanna see the spice#nigga#i lowkey just stared at her then said no#im not BUYING you that BULLSHIT i should make you read a historical book
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You guys don’t know how much yearning for Baghdad takes up of my mental real estate
#I have so many videos saved of last year’s trip#Me and my cousin laughing and joking w my dad while getting ready#The fact that multiple men asked my dad for my hand in marriage (lmao)#Me calling my mom every night to make fun of my “suitors”#All the gorgeous restaurants#Forcing my dad to rate every dress I tried on whenever he took me somewhere#Being catcalled by guys was an unpleasant experience but it was still fun to laugh ab it w my mom#Me having a MASSIVE crush on a family friend#That one time my dad said all the dresses I brought were too short so he bought me a dress that#Went down to literally my ankles#But the family friend was gonna be there so I showed it to my mom and she was like#“You’d wear that??? The queen of mini skirts????” And then she IMMEDIATELY clocked me and was like#Ur behaving strangely. U must have a crush. Who is it.#The hot fuckin summer nights that I spent sitting outside w my cousin on the big swing in the garden#The capital when it was drenched in sunset#When my aunt’s husband took me to the University of Baghdad and I got to literally play act being a student there#Which was a profound experience bc it’s the university my mom went to#Sneaking into the library even though u needed a student pass for that (:#Shadowing my uncle in his laboratory#My first ever nishan !!!#No weddings sadly but I got to see the buildup to the wedding so#And I think getting to call the shots and fly solo from the states to Amman and then to Baghdad was sick as hell#My mom never let me fly abroad by myself before and now im probably gonna be going solo all the time#Help I need to go back#Bro I wish I could drop everything#But before I go to Baghdad I’ll probably have to go to Belgium first for my uncle#SO many stops before I get to where I rly wanna be#I never explicitly told my dad im not religious but I think he already knows im full of sin. Memories..#Omg and my bibi’s delicious food
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#i won't make it to 2025 i've been crying all day#i don't want anyone to see meeee#and after the party here we'll go to my cousin's house because it's my mom's birthday so they're throwing her a surprise party there#and it's so fucking stupid!!! because idk what they're gonna tell her to take her there#she's gonna feel like her new year's party -which she works hard on every year- is being underappreciated#and that same cousin was going to be here with us! like why 2 partiessss whyyyyyy who's gonna clean all that#meeee because i don't like being around people and i start washing dishes when everyone is gathered doing what people do at parties#but of i say any of this to my siblings they'll think it's just because i don't wanna leave the house which is also true !!!!#i feel so ill so desperate. this is not just not being in the mood. i can't calm down i can't even swallow properly#i haven't eaten anything because i feel my throat is closed and my heart beats so fast and i feel like i'm gonna throw up my own heart#and my stomach and neck and back hurt from how tense i'm am and my head hurts because i can't stop crying#my eyes are so red and so swollen. i'm gonna look disgusting when everyone gets here#📓
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force myself to live through new years or kill myself. that is the question.
#and then it would be my birthday (march) and i dont wanna do that#and going back to school#and having to see my grandma#and having to have a body#and having like 0 irl friends lmao#and seeing my cousin and her kid and im scared of that#and i know their going to send me back one day#and getting followed by that fucking cop at school#i dont want to live this shit suck so fucking much and ill never be able to actually do anything meaningful about it#progress is a lie
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Birthmas manga and merch haul
#prince's talk tag#this was the stuff I bought when I went to the city two days ago for my bday#it was a great day i bought so much b.l. and s.tar r.ail stuff#i did make a mistake on my part bc usually i buy one shots#bc i know its only one book instead of having to worry about an unknown number of volumes#i dont always follow this but i try to stick to one shots when buying b.l.#but with one of them i think i was really into the blurb that i failed to see the 1 on the cover indicating therell be more#eeh its fine if i like ill just collect it#but the other ones i read the blurbs and went 'oooo interesting! add to cart' and then physically put it in my shopping basket#the light novel tho that was intentional i love that series and i wanna see how sayaka's middle relationship played out#bc it did not end pretty from what we learned from the main series#i do have to finish it im up to vol 6#the p.r.s.k. book i was not expecting to see at kino like i didnt know it existed. but its p.r.s.k. so ofc i bought it#and now the merch. kino had a table and wall dedicated to ge.npa.ct and s.tar r.ail (more the former than the latter)#but i went ham on the s.tar r.ail stuff when i saw faves 2 and 3 (they only had up to xi.anzh.ou characters‚ no pe.nac.ony)#but that was ok i bought what i saw#and they even had bookmark sized boards of the aeons so i got my faves#the cards in the last pic came in a box and at first i thought they were blind boxes so i bought two but both had the same cards in them#so imma give one to my cousin and kept one for myself#this was the only way pen.aco.ny characters were available and look its my number one fave!! hes going in my photocard book#so while i don't play ge.nsh.in anymore i do like the characters and the lore#and i like Alh.ait.ham so when i saw something with him on it and it was the last one they had i bought it#its a keychain and a standee so i have him sitting on my desk rn#and then i saw only one instance of mi.lgr.am merch in the form of those keychains so i bought two with expressions i like#they didnt gave 02‚ 03 or 04 tho i was curious what they looked like
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yeah
#bored at my cousins rn bc no ones home#going to grandma's tonight so they went out to buy a new carrier for the cat#i could make one last bad decision and cut my bangs rn. or i could not. i could continue watching netflix.#so i chose to open the fake hsr text maker#do u guys wanna see my cousin's cat#he's so cute ive taken 120 pictures since last night#stelle hsr#dan heng hsr#hsr
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Listen man, I vibe with everyone, canon and OCs. You show up at my doorstep I open the door. I rp with everyone equally.
#petals fall like rain / ooc#the only thing i have in my rules that some might take offense to#is that i dont typically like the whole long lost sibling cousin etc plot without talking first#and i think thats justified tbh like as. a canon i wanna hash stuff out like that prior#but like ive never turned away an oc#if anything I've been on the ghosting/receiving end of being ignored by ocs and fellow canons before#and i typically do not approach first bc of this#but like you will never see me not interact with any one who approaches me#I'm equal opportunity i just want interactions man#but you will also never see me beg for interaction i figure if people are interested they will come#and maybe this makes me look bad ig bc i dont pester oc writers i do follow#but like i also dont wanna bother anyone or be annoying#idk man i feel i guess guilty????#but like yes oc canon you are all equal come to me#hell i even love oc x canon ships like i am down to clown in any capacity#but its very rare for me to reach out first#plus most of the people i do write with are slow repliers or maybe ocs they dont use often or whatever#but like idk i feel really guilty rn but yes idk who you are or who or what you write#if you come i will write with you#thats the tldr here
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rewatching the first episode of bloodhounds and the instant connection between gunwoo and woojin has struck me all over again! I adore that gunwoo just genuinely loves boxing. This hobby-turned-passion may have started to protect his mother but it’s something he finds such solace and joy in. He truly embodies the heart-of-a-boxer mentality that he mentions on the rooftop.
You can see gunwoo be a little taken aback at the showmanship of woojin. I’d like to put a little bit of intrigue there too because it’s so different to his own serious, by-the-book style. And then after the match, when gunwoo is waiting outside the locker room and his puppy energy is just off the charts!!! he says that everyone else left :( but I think he secretly he was just waiting for woojin. And he is so eager and woojin is just staring at this kid like what the fuck? shouldn’t he be annoyed at this rookie who KO’d him? but nah how could he be when it’s so glaringly obvious that the kid loves boxing for boxing’s sake and he’s such a sweetheart.
so they get dinner!! at the barbecue buffet!! and it’s at this part that woojin’s interest is well and truly piqued. He wants to know more about gunwoo and his rapid-fire questions are his way of getting the information. the two of them bond and i gotta love sangyi’s and dohwan’s chemistry because you can literally see their friendship come together, that bond unbreakable.
And then the next morning! I could write an entire thesis about that first morning after the match! Gunwoo immediately calls his new friend woojin and woojin answers and even when he’s so tired and he doesn’t understand just why gunwoo would go to the gym, he still picks up the phone and his little amused-- and already so fond!!!!-- “gosh, you’re so clingy in the morning” is immediately nullified whenever he tells gunwoo to come over!
and i love that woojin rapidly and without missing a beat understands and reworks his potential first impression of gunwoo. you can literally see him decide that “idk how this kid has managed this long without me but now i’m here and i’m not letting anything hurt him.”
and just the moments later-- their married couple ass bickering the second time they go to the buffet with hyunju before they are once again a united front as they both bicker with her!
the montage after the devastation of Episode Six-- the way gunwoo so totally loses it all, his driving need to save his hyung, the way he carried woojin’s drunk ass to bed the night before (and if i hc that woojin wasn’t as drunk as it showed? that maybe there’s a conversation that happens in that moment?). his sheer relief. the way that in the wake of everything falling to pieces, they have each other and nothing will ever come between them-- the way they’re stronger than ever.
and don’t even get me started on their time in the granddaughter’s apartment?! it’s so obvious??? the way she tells them not to be creepy old men and they’re so confused but as soon as they realize what she’s alluding to, their faces wrinkle in disgust and they’re like “lmao wtf absolutely not u don’t have to worry about that” the way they’re talking one morning and??? they don’t realize she’s in the room???? and that’s because she was ON THE TOP BUNK AND THAT NECESSARILY MEANS THAT THEY SHARED THE BED ON THE GROUND FLOOR BECAUSE HOW ELSE WOULD THEY NOT KNOW SHE SLEPT THERE??????????????
#i'm going to write a fic and it's going to be titled the heart of a boxer#i want to see them in those quiet moments of the show#i want to see them happy and secure post canon#i KNOW that gunwoo's mom sees more than she lets on and she's very happy for her son#they get married idc and the granddaughter makes a joke that she knew all along#i wanna see woojin get jealous of someone flirting with gunwoo bc his man is so oblivious#i want to see them with kids#they make a nice little fortune boxing for a few years#and the rich guy i forget his name#he gave them a lot more money than the show said#and they keep that connection#because him and his cousin weren't kidding when they were drunk and said they have to take care of these kids#man i love woojin and gunwoo#bloodhounds#bloodhounds kdrama#my writing tag#fic ideas
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