#and i thought they were going to be good writers and flip the script but nooo

[jimothyhalperts]

Like I really like rhaenyra and team black and I think she is the legit heir but they way HoTD is so blatantly team black outrages me bit

[pastafossa]

PASTAAAA I JUST FINISHED TONIGHT’S EPISODE AND I’M SO DISTRAUGHT NOW I’M GONNA MISS THE WEEKLY EPISODES SO BAD 😭💔 WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS??

I SERIOUSLY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO WITHOUT THE WEEKLY EPS. 😭 We only just got our beloved man back, and now he's off again. Even if I support why he's gone (I am all in support of them splitting the seasons so they could write a new script and do the reshoots and bring everyone back), it's still like... but, but, but, I missed him for so long, wait come back matty

Me just waiting for S2 and the return of our husband again like

SOME THOUGHTS CAUSE I'M SO GD HAPPY

We continue to get an explosion of stylized color now that Matt's let go of his false life. That cold, washed out, very sterile lighting was VERY sorta Twilight Zone feeling, and it gives all the color and lightning now even MORE of an impact. Those splashes of red when Frank was killing outside the Port, the washes of blue whenever we're seeing from Dex's perspective, the flashes of red with Matt, just (chef's kiss)

Blowing up Matt's new apartment felt like the new writers going 'FINALLY, WOOOOOO OLD SHIT GONE, LIGHT IT UP! LIGHT IT UP! (explosion) WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!' I didn't know they'd get QUITE that literal when it came to torching Matt's false life but here we are (moment of sadness for all his treasures he probably had up there though like his dad's trunk unless he hid that somewhere else, we got the torching but at what cost 😭)

Hilarious realization that the reason Frank was like, 'what, are ya gonna fight em with your ass hanging out???' when Matt got up to go get his suit on while still in the hospital gown, was because Matt really would have just had his bare goddamn ass just out to the breeze in front of Frank. He really didn't give two fucks by that point (probably still a little drugged), and for some reason that had me wheezing over it all over again despite having laughed my OWN ass off when Frank said it in the scene (and then laughed harder when Matt just flipped him off, Matt's NOT had a good day). FRANK GOT TO SEE THE CAKE, WHEN IS IT OUR TURN

Oh Heather, oh Heather, that ain't the way baby. I'm still processing it - like... her vigilante thing I could sorta get. I said last week that I was looking at it a bit like, if you'd never gotten close to a dog before and the first time you do it winds up mauling you, yeah, you're going to be afraid of dogs or hate them for a while even if later you realize that's not necessarily logical and that not all dogs are bad. But her complete disregard for Matt's legitimate fear on the danger Fisk represented, to the point of going to work for Fisk? Like... girl no. I'm going to see what they do in S2. Hell, everyone in the Netflix series pulls a major fuckup at least once and they were all given chances to make up for it, so we'll see.

JOSIE, JOSIE IS A PART OF THE GOOD FIGHT, FUCK YES JOSIE, FUCK YES FUCK YES FUCK YES

ARMY. ARMY. JESS??? JESSICA????? LUKE???? MY BABIES???/ THEY GONNA GET MY BABIES???? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEEEEEEEEEASE

I won't lie, the head squish was one of the grossest things I'd seen in a long time, well played Disney, you did not Disney-fy the show.

Ya'll gonna regret putting Frank in that cage, YA DUN MESSED UP A-A...NTHONY.

[shrinkthisviolet]

I have quite a bit to share this week :D be proud of me!

1x15/1x16 fic:

“I don’t think it would be quite appropriate,” Dad cut in smoothly before she could say anything, “for Morgan to offer opinions on a situation that she has no experience with.” Cisco frowned. “I…that wasn’t quite what I m—” “It’s called empathy,” Morgan snapped, feeling unusually brave with Cisco beside her. “Haven’t you ever empathized with a friend who’s going through something difficult, even if you haven’t experienced that yourself?” “No,” Dad replied, “because that’s called sympathy, Starlight, not empathy. And with the way you’ve been acting lately, I wonder if you really believe you can’t relate to him.” “Uh,” Cisco started, but Morgan ignored him. “Even if I did,” she retorted, “wouldn’t that say more about you than me?” Dad’s eyes flashed. “And so the truth comes out. Go on then, Morgan, why don’t you say how you really feel? Since you’re so intent on trampling on Cisco’s very real familial issues with your imagined ones?”

So to explain the context of this argument: Cisco chose to come to give Morgan moral support when she tells Eowells that she was accepted to SCU (she ofc has no intention of doing that, but Cisco thinks she will).

They were just talking about Cisco's decision not to go to his brother's party, and he prompted Morgan to "add" something (prompting her to reveal her SCU acceptance), but...well, you can see how Eowells took that.

The argument keeps going after this, but this was already 7 paragraphs on its own 😅 but it's a pretty pivotal scene! There's a reason I set this up in the way I did 👀

March YOTP Fic:

“One peppermint mocha, please.” “Funny.” He startled as none other than Iris, who didn’t know that they were best friends (and had started to become something else too) in another timeline, walked up beside him, grinning. “That’s my favorite drink too. What a coincidence, huh?” Barry froze, staring at her. He couldn’t help it—his best friend, his years-long crush, who he’d kissed months ago on a sunlit porch in a different timeline, was standing right next to him, smiling as though nothing had changed. It was enough to make him feel giddy…and flustered. She seemed to have that effect on him. “What?” Her teasing voice pulled him from his thoughts. “Cat got your tongue?”

Now you might say “Lavi, you already posted a YOTP fic this month.” Which is true, but...that was a very belated Feb fic 😅 this is the real March one.

It's basically a rewrite of their first meeting in Flashpoint, because...am I the only one who thought that it wasn't really that cute? Their banter was, obviously, but uh...the stalking (for 6 months, per Nora)? The theft (yes, ik it's minor, but he steals her wallet just to have an excuse to talk to her)? Yeah no. This is much sweeter imo 💞 especially since Iris gets to do the pursuing for once. Barry's usually the one doing it, so imo Flashpoint is a great chance to flip the script :D Barry can be flustered and nervous while also writing a good meet-cute, writers! It can be done!

This won't be a very long fic, since it's just fixing their initial scene, so it'll be done and posted tomorrow!

Lucy AU ESB fic:

“Copy!” Lucy froze again at the sound of Luke’s voice. “I’ve been hit!” “Stay focused, Six!” Astra warned, but Lucy couldn’t think straight. Luke…Luke was— Then Astra swerved in front of her, taking a hit meant for her, and Lucy cried out in shock as her wingman plummeted. “No!” “Keep…going! ‘ll…be fine!” She sounded fine enough, and Lucy could feel that Luke was too despite his crash, so she dodged another shot and fired on the pilot who had downed Astra. (A flicker of satisfaction rushed through her at that—that’s for my friend, you dirty Imp—but she ignored it.)

Bet you didn't think you'd see this one on here :D but yep it's back and better than ever! I'm nearly through the Hoth battle (fight scenes are harddd and so are flight scenes), which is what kept tripping me up, and from there, it'll be smooth sailing. And that last part...oh boy. I can't fault her for her reaction tbh, but in terms of Star Wars...be careful about that feeling, Lucy! (Especially since it's in parantheses, so it's not something she fully registers)

Taglist (send an ask or DM to be added or removed):

@arrthurpendragon @ocappreciationtag @raith-way @vexic929 @ironverseocs

@thechaoticfanartist @tempests-of-hope @negative-speedforce @starstruckpurpledragon @dream-beyond-the-fantasy

@angst-is-love-angst-is-life

[birdhouseblog25]

Yugioh Honest Opinion Zexal Edition pt. 1

-Zexal is a cool show with cool characters, it tries something new and feels like a spiritual successor to Duel Monsters that help flesh out its world and narrative.

-The world duel carnival is fun and has one of the best finals in the arc. It's my favorite tournament arc along with battle city with memorable duels and good story telling with an emotional twist.

-I love the idea of the numbers having different abilities affecting the holder it posses. I know for some fans, if not most fans, aren't too keen on the whole 'hunting numbers' arc in season 1 but I like it.

-Unlike the heart pieces, the numbers have unique design, effects and flare to the story presenting different situations Yuma has to face in order to be a better duelist.

-The dub isn't too bad. It's tolerable at best. My only issue is that some emotional beats are handled half hazardly due to the writing of the dub script writing. It is 2025, dub producers, you don't have to follow 4kids dub dialouge all the time.

-Speaking of beats, the japanese soundtrack is so good. The amount of trumpets for an orchestral techno beat is immaculate 🎺.

-Take A Chance is better than Halfway To Forever. Take a chance has a nice beat to it that makes it very memorable. Halfway to Forever has a cool beat but it doesn't hit as hard as the first opening. Not to mention the Japanese opening themes outshines it as well.

-The Tron family powers need to be fleshed out more. We know that Byron AKA Vetrix gain this power from traveling through another world but it feels like there was more to the explanation that the anime didn't really explain in detail.

-Dr. Faker is a good villian with missed potential. By no means he is a bad villain, but there's just something missing about him that needed another wow factor. His character design was on point; he fits the crazy mad scientist motif and most of all the only reason why he went down this path of villainy was because he was trying to find cure for Harts illness by sacrificing Kazuma and Byron to barian world. Despite that, I wish we were given enough time of his thought process of how he slowly became the antagonist.

- We see in the second season in Destra backstory that there was a program both she, nistro and kite were part of training for numbers. The writers never explained NOR tell us what this program is, who the other applicants were and how Mr. Heartland funded it. It still racks my brain to this day.

-Just because Bronk has a Brooklyn accent doesn't change how low he is in the tier list of yugioh best friends. He's helps Yuma on multiple occasions, but nothing really changes about him besides his interest in Rio. I feel like bronc had had some major missed potential that could have been fleshed out more in the anime. Maybe once I get to the manga it could change up a bit.

- and just because he created the super number Hunter sleuth's group doesn't change much either. Yes bronc has used a number, and that most of the friend group has seen a number yet they never fought one or even own one. Which to me is kind of a cop out, but I really didn't care at that point.

-Flip is not a good person. You can't convince me otherwise. I did not feel bad when he got absorbed by the chaos energy in season 3. He kinda just causes problems maybe kinda-sorta learns his lesson; sure he built a memorial for Astral with the others but even then he doesn't go through any MAJOR change in his character.

-Tori isn't the best heroine in the roster, but unlike Tea she does help Yuma and Astral through most the story despite her lack narrative of just having a crush on him. Yes she confessed to him at the end of the show but really? How is this effective to her character?? Like at all???

-Cathy was a better candidate to be a heroine, Anna Kaboom too. However both suffer from lack of change in narrative beside their crush for Yuma. Sure, Anna has a focus episode to confronting her mentor about retiring but that was it. Nothing too substantial.

- Caswell is interesting. That's it that's all I have to say about him he's just kind of there as a support character.

[iheart-nana]

lvi. on and off-stage drama

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX ─ on and off-stage drama.

❛ i swear i don't love the drama, it loves me ❜

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

"What?!" I breathed out, "Inhyuk's going back to his village? Taesung and Jay are quitting Eclipse? What- what do you mean by that?"

"Exactly," Sunjae nodded remorsefully, "They're saying that they'll finish this festival performance one last time and then quit. But Inhyuk's already left. He's staying with his parents in his village."

It felt as if my entire world was falling apart. I couldn't let this happen. I was supposed to change the future for the better, not create a bigger mess. I had to fix this, by whatever means necessary. 

"Well, we gotta stop this," I said decisively, "Let's talk to Taesung after rehearsal."

"It's a plan," Sunjae said, smiling. His face twisted into an expression of shock when he looked at his watch, "Oh! We're ten minutes late!"

Narrator's Perspective

"What language is this, even?" Yumi exclaimed looking at the script, "Thou lovs't me not with the full weight that I love thee? This nutjob has written the entire play like this! How did I even pass the audition?"

The other students who were part of the cast sat and watched the 'couple' in adoration instead of revising their scripts. They whispered and giggled uncontrollably, much to Yumi's irritation. Taesung, however, was not-so-secretly enjoying it. He was basking in the attention, and the fact that people thought he and Yumi were a real couple made his heart swell with joy.

"You'll do fine," he placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. His touch still made sparks dance across her skin. He leaned towards her face and gave her a smile, "We've got plenty of time, hmm?"

"What's your role anyways?" Yumi asked, looking anywhere but at his face.

"Oliver," he answered, not shifting his gaze.

Yumi began furiously flipping through the pages of the script. All of a sudden, she gasped, "Seriously?"

"What?" Taesung asked, sitting next to her, peering into the script.

"Oliver and Celia get married at the end?" she scoffed, but her flushed face said otherwise, "On the basis of what? I swear Shakespeare was on crack each time he picked up his pen."

"How could you say such a thing about him?" Eunyoung said. She had just gotten there along with Sunjae, "Why hasn't rehearsal started yet?"

"Well, the director suddenly fell sick so the writers told us to revise on our own for today," Taesung explained.

"Oh, we ran here for no reason," Sunjae said, chuckling while shooting a knowing glance at Eunyoung. Eunyoung smiled back, "I know right?"

"Ooooh, damn are you two a thing now?" asked one of the girls sitting close to them, eavesdropping.

"How 'bout you mind your own business?" Yumi sneered with hostility.

"How am I supposed to ignore it when they're flirting right in front of me?"

"Maybe you need a lesson on personal space?" Yumi said, taking a step away from her. 

The girl rolled her eyes, then picked up her things and walked off, muttering under her breath.

"You seem to be in a mood today," Eunyoung observed.

"You can thank Shakespeare for that," Yumi replied.

"I don't know why you hate a man who died several centuries ago," Eunyoung uttered.

"I don't know why you like a man who died several centuries ago," Yumi countered.

"I don't like the man, I just thing his work had a timeless element to it."

"And so here we are."

"Okay, okay, stop the bickering," Taesung said waving his hand between them.

"We're not bickering," Yumi shrugged.

"That's just how we get along," Eunyoung agreed, giving Yumi a small smile.

"As long as there's no bloodshed, I'm good," Taesung said.

"How's the prep for the Eclipse performance going?" Yumi asked eagerly. Her question was followed by a long, awkward silence. Taesung stared at Sunjae, Sunjae glanced at Eunyoung, and Eunyoung looked at Yumi nervously.

"I guess you don't know," Sunjae said as gently as he could, "Inhyuk left for his village, because he wanted to help his parents out... He's also planning on dropping out."

"What?!" Yumi exclaimed. Heads turned to see what the commotion was about. She stood, completely stunned for few seconds, "What's going to happen to your band?" She shot a worried look at Eunyoung, as if to say What is happening? Is this our fault?

"Taesung, didn't you-" Eunyoung gestured him not to mention it, shaking her head as subtly as she could. She didn't want to give Taesung and Yumi a reason to argue again. Sunjae covered up his blunder, "Didn't you say you were going to call him?"

"Um... yeah I was," said Taesung, glad that they hadn't mentioned to Yumi that he was going to leave the band, "He didn't pick up."

"So, Sunjae and I were thinking," Eunyoung began, "That we go and visit his village and bring him back to his senses. What do you think?"

"I'm in," Taesung said, looking at Yumi, his eyes full of expectation.

"What if we can't convince him?"

"Oh, you pessimist," Eunyoung groaned, "If he doesn't agree voluntarily, then we'll kidnap him, okay? Are you in or not?"

"I'm in," she said, realizing she wasn't left with much of a choice.

"Good," said Sunjae, "We leave tomorrow?"

"Yeah," said everyone in unison.

There were a few minutes of silence as they all went back to reading their scripts. A moment later, Eunyoung looked up, "Hey, Taesung?"

"Hmm?"

"I had to ask you about that..." she trailed off.

Taesung frowned with confusion, but the realization hit him soon enough and she said, "Oh,  right. Of course," he said, getting up, "We'll be back."

Yumi and Sunjae watched them get up and go outside the auditorium.

"That was weird," Yumi said, furrowing her brows.

"Breathe if you're jealous."

💿

"Any updates?" she asked Taesung, "About my dad? Was the information I gave conclusive enough?"

"Yeah, they've started the investigation," he answered, "My dad said that considering his history, he'll most likely get a life sentence. He wanted me to ask if it's okay with you."

"Yes, absolutely," Eunyoung said decisively. 

Taesung blinked a few times, "Okay, if that's what you want."

"It is."

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: bet u didn't see that one coming

delphi's notes: yumi and sunjae are such an awkward duo lmfao 

[shadowlink06]

When Rogio was saved, the first pages afterwards I had a very different impression of what would happen. I thought it was going to focus on a platonic friendship between Rogio and Ferah. Rogio had just experienced Ranach leaving him to die, and Ferah delt with the pain of betrayal from Kargo's brother. Ferah showed genuine concern for Rogio on page 179, and also seemed to be smiling at him on page 184 and then on page 200 he's smiling at her fondly. That's basically where it ends, though. He stopped acknowledging Ferah when Rhov showed up. I really did end up liking Ferah with Fjordor, and I'll never understand why they didn't rekindle their relationship afterwards... like, why didn't she run there instead of ending up at Whispervale. Whispervale also had some interesting aspects to me, until Keirr became an asshole to everyone.

Oops, lost the original point of this. I guess that's fitting given the subject.

I do think the problem with Rogio is that Kique just flipped the script so suddenly, he sacrificed previous canon lore just to cater to the changes aka bending the story for the character. This is fundamentally where things went wrong. As an author you have to have logic for every character's action.

Rogio could have been written well. For instance, the ghoul he had inside him was actually a good angle, as was the nightmares. The problem was, those two things didn't impact the character. Rogio was too busy fucking Roamer and suddenly the nightmares didn't come back until Kique needed to be. I would be less annoyed with Rogio/MT if I saw the nightmares/demon effect his relationship with Roamer for the ENTIRE story arc up until he saw the Sapphire Elk. That is where Kique fails at. He just won't acknowledge long term ramifications for a character's actions, especially when it comes to Roamer, Rogio, Ranach, and Rome.

As far as Ferah and Fjordor, I think ( and this is speculation on my part) that relationship didn't proceed forward because Kique got caught pulling Spartacus dialogue at the time. Compound that with rewriting Kargo's personality for the PTSD scene with the Solar Stag merchants, he probably needed an excuse to force them to go back to the MT (which they absolutely should not have because of the trauma they suffered through). Kargo and Ferah proved they were capable of surviving on their own, so it was a 180 for a chance to kill off Kargo. And let's be real, Kique has favorites in this comic. Him building a relationship outside of those favorites would take screentime away from his self inserts and he won't do that. I think this is the reason that Keirr didn't stay with what's-his-face. Why Ferah and what's-her-face barely got a scene outside of that rabbit chase scene, and why straight couples are barely acknowledged in the story.

Kique is allergic to his own world building. It's an abnormal phenomenon for a writer to have.

[being-of-rain]

I thought I'd continue my usual trend of writing my thoughts down on new Doctor Who episodes, by talking about The Star Beast. As usual, I set out to write something quick and concise, but the Wrarth Warriors busted down my door and told me that I legally couldn't.

Apparently I still have the impulse to describe Doctor Who episodes as 'fun', but by and large it's a fun show! And a fun episode! Even if I'm not as obsessed with him as a lot of fans, RTD has a charm which it's hard not to enjoy, especially with lots of little jokes and bits of physical comedy (I love little bits of physical comedy). And it's a funny episode, I was laughing from the moment the Doctor picked up a box, saw Donna, and put the box back again. Well that's not true, I was laughing from the moment I saw David Tennant just standing in green screen space like he was about to tell me the exciting new direction he intended to take the company. I'm glad everyone else seems to find that as funny as I did.

Another word I could use to describe the episode is a bit surreal. Having Beep the Meep and the Wrarth Warriors on screen was a little surreal, but strangely I found it even more so that the Doctor was walking around not knowing who Beep the Meep was. I mean obviously that was always going to be the case, but all Doctor Who mediums just live together inside my head and it was just weird to see him not recognise an iconic enemy. Maybe that was just me. Oh but Beep and the Warriors looked fantastic! It's hard to believe they're all physical effects! I really wasn't too interested in the UNIT gunfight that didn't really do much for the story, but if the new big budget lets aliens look that good then I'm fine with it. Other slightly surreal or strange things involved finally watching Doctor Who again after more than a year's break, watching it on Disney Plus rather than Australia's ABC channel, and seeing Ruth Madeley on-screen as UNIT's scientific advisor when she's also playing a companion of the Sixth Doctor in the audios at the moment.

Oh and, of course, having the Tenth Doctor and Donna back on-screen, and the TV show doing what fanfiction writers have been doing for 15 years. That was really surreal. I definitely like the two of them, but I don't have the same rampant nostalgia for their time on the show like lots of people do. I'm glad lots of people are enjoying the nostalgia aspect, but I'm also glad this is a mini-series rather than a full one. And already there's some aspects back of RTD's writing which I'm not super fond of- like conclusions that try to use technobabble and music-swelling emotional moments to smooth over the fact that some things are just happening without much cause or set-up. RTD's usually pretty good at that too- that's how the whole DoctorDonna thing started in the first place, after all- so Donna and Rose just 'letting go' of the metacrisis did feel like it fell unusually flat. Especially with it being paired with a 'women are better than men' moment which felt more like something from a Moffat script (I say this as a fan of both these writers).

Okay, that was just me trying to get all of my negatives out of the way! On the flip side, Rose inheriting the metacrisis and saving the day was a wonderful revelation, and I love that daughter/mother and loving family relationships were so important on the whole. Seeing Sylvia stumble with pronouns but still try was so lovely, as was Donna being so aggressively supportive of her daughter. And Shaun was a small role but so hilarious.

The chat outside the Tardis was great too, with Shaun dunking on the Doctor, and Donna being genre-savvy enough to stop her daughter getting into the Tardis but not enough to save herself. The new Tardis itself was a little empty to me (I'll always prefer more homely interiors) but was still extremely cool. All I want is for the show to come up with excuses for creative ways to use the mood lights. And I couldn't imagine a better ending to the episode than the console exploding because Donna spilt coffee on it, 10/10 no notes.

I know basically nothing about the next episode, and it seems that's the case for most people, so I'm terribly excited about it! It seems potentially scary spooky 👀 I'm so here for that

[flutishly]

When “unliked” doesn’t mean “unlikable”, or, Expanded thoughts on Janine Teagues

I’ve been rewatching Abbott Elementary quite a bit these past few days. It’s not an organized rewatch, but a sporadic, messy mishmash of a few episodes from season 1 and mostly episodes from season 2, in no particular order (and I’ve rewatched some of the same episodes a few times already, even in the same evening). The more I rewatched, the more I found myself recognizing just how much I love Janine - something I’ve already posted about - and recognizing just how much the show leans into the idea that Janine is not well-liked by many (if not most) of her peers. And it got me thinking about the differences between “unliked” characters and “unlikable” characters, particularly in modern television.

At the peak of “peak TV” discourse (ugh), critics and cultural writers loved to talk about antiheros, unlikable (men) characters who were fairly obviously not good people, but compelling protagonists. But Abbott Elementary somewhat flips the script. Janine is a character who is demonstrably unliked by several of her colleagues, with the show’s writing often teasing her directly. And yet she remains the protagonist and the viewer is still clearly supposed to be rooting for her.

Janine’s radical optimism is easily mocked. Her insistence on believing that things can happen by sheer intention is taken down in both plot-direct and -indirect ways. Her tendency to rush to try to fix everything is shown to irritate those around her, though they also depend on it. Her chattiness and outward friendliness exhaust some of her more jaded fellow teachers. Some even go so far as to comment dismissively on how precisely they dislike Janine, whether they’re side characters brought on for one episode or part of the main cast. Ava in particular is often very vocal about her dislike of Janine (even if some of it is obviously performative and there’s a seed of genuine appreciation or admiration at the core of their relationship), but she’s not alone; in season 2, we see numerous occasions of Melissa rather unkindly pillorying Janine or shooting her down. Time and again, we see examples of people simply not liking Janine or not having the patience for her. We see Janine struggling to make friends. We see Janine struggling to connect with fellow teachers. We see Janine struggling to gain recognition for her work. Season 2 in particular is filled with such cases or situations where people are outright mean to Janine, which can often feel especially jarring given the show’s general “feel-good” tone. 

And yet despite all of these obvious textual examples of being “unliked”, Janine is not “unlikable” by any stretch of the imagination. Her intensity is also her greatest asset, which the show demonstrates again and again. Her passion and devotion are looked upon with love by Jacob, Gregory, and even Erica. We see Janine solve problems, do her best to stretch out of her comfort zone, and grow as a person. We see that she’s not trying to change her personality; her growth is about finding space for herself after a lifetime of giving it to others, but this has nothing to do with how she presents herself to the world. (I think this can also be seen in how the show treats her fashion choices, but that’s a bit of a tangent.) 

Janine is a character that the viewer is meant to generally like, whether or not everyone necessarily loves her or sees themselves in her (the way that I rather undeniably do). Janine is still very much the main character of the show and much of the narratives presented surround her relationships with her coworkers, which often do center on their respect for her. The show is not trying to cast her as an antihero or irritating “love to hate her” sort of character. She doesn’t have the cringe factor of a character like Michael Scott of The Office, or even Leslie Knope’s obvious over-the-top humor (though Leslie is probably the closest mapping, at least the Leslie of later, more settled seasons of Parks and Recreation). Earnest characters - and people - are easy to mock in an era of cynicism, but it shouldn’t be the case. 

Yes, I wish that Abbott Elementary could be a bit kinder to Janine, truthfully, and to Jacob as well (though he is much cringier...), but I still appreciate that the show is demonstrating how even when a character is disliked by many around her, there are those who still love and cherish her. That maybe the problem with others disliking Janine has more to do with those characters’ issues than Janine’s personality itself. That being “unliked” says nothing about whether the character - the person - is inherently “unlikable” or worthy of love. And I find this helpful when I look at the fandom too, where it often feels like Janine is forgotten as an independent character and is compelling only in the context of her relationships with others. It almost doesn’t matter how others view or appreciate her character. Ultimately, I will continue to love and appreciate her character for all that she is and all that she represents.

[fivenightsatfreddysfanfiction]

From the Outside

The Afton-Herrera household as seen from the perspectives of a judgey teacher, nosy script writers, and gossipy kids looking for a podcast topic.

Time Set: Post-SB, Pre-Ruin

----------------------------------

Three hours in and Mrs. Feldman was ready to escape via the window rather than have to deal with another set of parents who would insist their kid was a perfect little angel and do nothing to help her resolve situations. Being a teacher was equal parts rewarding and demoralizing; some days there was more of one feeling over the other and she never knew what ratio she’d get until she got it.

Parent-Teacher Nights were her bane, but she was finally on the last appointment with her newest student and his guardians. If she could survive this, there’d be a nice chilled bottle of wine with her name on it back home. With a deep breath, she settled herself as best she could and then buzzed in the final appointment.

The door to her classroom opened after a few minutes, letting in the young woman she had met on enrollment day, Ms. Afton, of unfortunate relation to the founders of Afton Robotics which had recently been caught up in yet another short-lived scandal. Following her in was her sulking son, Gregory, the subject of tonight’s chat, and then following him in was someone Mrs. Feldman didn’t recognize, a young man with a tired look to him, like he’d just been pulled out of a long day at work to sit in on this meeting without a break in between. She could sympathize with that; maybe he was thinking of a drink at home for himself, too?

“It’s good to see you again, Mrs. Afton,” Mrs. Feldman greeted her warmly before glancing towards the man expectantly. She couldn’t remember now if she’d been told that the young woman was married. Afton was her maiden name, wasn’t it? Then did her husband take on her name instead? It wasn’t unheard of but this would be the first time she’d encounter such an odd take on family naming.

“Um, it’s Miss,” Miss Afton corrected sheepishly, her cheeks pink at the faux pax, “I’m not married.”

“Oh! I’m sorry for assuming so,” Mrs. Feldman quickly tried to backtrack embarrassedly, ignoring the little snort from Gregory. She glanced at the unknown man again in time to catch him mid-eyeroll. A flicker of annoyance shot through her mind before she reminded herself that this was Miss Afton’s first Parent-Teacher meeting so of course more of the family would show up rather than be present at Gregory’s enrollment. But an introduction would be nice, so why wasn’t he speaking up? “Then this must be-?” she asked leadingly. Boyfriend? Fiancé? ...Flavor of the week?

“This is Sydney Herrera, my best friend!” Miss Afton introduced brightly, smiling over at the silent man staring at Mrs. Feldman. The teacher twitched just a little, a tiny bit. Why was he staring? What was wrong with him? “We co-parent so I thought it’d be fine to bring him along,” Miss Afton went on without a care in the world.

“Coulda brought Freddy, instead,” Gregory muttered grumpily. Neither his mother or the ‘other parent’ reacted to his words.

Mrs. Feldman could feel her stress levels rising. Maybe this was going to be worse than those in-denial parents after all?

“This is my first Parent-Teacher meeting, so I went looking online for some guidelines on how these are supposed to go,” Miss Afton added, digging through her purse before pulling out a small binder with several pages stuck inside, a label slapped on the cover reading ‘Manual for Parent-Teacher Nights’. She opened it and flipped through some of the papers while Mr. Herrera gave her an exasperated look and then shared it with Gregory, the boy just raising an eyebrow at him and folding his arms over his chest. “According to the manual, we go over his grade progress, social progress, discuss any problems with regards to class behaviors and/or schoolwork, then map out solutions to resolve said problems and generate a follow-up meeting to evaluate post-solution status,” Miss Afton declared in a proud tone.

Yes, stress levels would certainly rise with this one. Pretty face, empty head; no wonder this Mr. Herrera was latched to her. Friend-zoning probably wasn’t a problem for him, Mrs. Feldman thought sourly.

Well, she still had a job to do, and she’d do it to the best of her ability. Not her fault Miss Afton was clearly in over her head at parenting. But with how old Gregory appeared to be and how young Miss Afton looked, it was clear that there was a lot Miss Afton didn’t know about the world and people in general. Tragic.

“Alright, so in terms of grades and schoolwork, Gregory does hold a relatively average score for reading, writing, and history,” Mrs. Feldman began, looking over her notes and examples of the boy’s work while Miss Afton listened attentively. “His scores for math and science are above average, so he does have strengths and interest in some subjects. It’s just that he seems to.. let his mind wander often. As if he can’t keep his attention on anything that isn’t of interest to him.”

“Is that a problem?” Miss Afton asked and she sighed at the question. Typical clueless mother type. “He does his work and his grades aren’t failing, right? I mean they could be better and I’ll talk with him about that but him zoning out between tasks…”

“I wouldn’t be tuned out if she let me draw while she’s talking,” Gregory piped up with a petulant shrug, “Drawing lets me get stuff in my head out so I can focus on this world.”

That was the same excuse he gave her for making those strange doodles about the defunct pizzeria and creepy robot animals. Mrs. Feldman expected the same frustration about it from Miss Afton, but the young woman just gave her son a sympathetic look. Great, so she’s why Gregory behaved in such a manner.

“What you draw might confuse people, Gregory,” Miss Afton told him, “But if you need to do something with your hands, we can ask Mr. Woods if he has a spare fidget cube you can have.”

“Cassie is okay with my comics,” Gregory countered with a huff, “She thinks it’s kind of weird but she’s not confused by it.” He paused for a moment, then sighed, “But fine, we can ask Mr. Woods about it. At least Alex won’t flip his shit if it’s just Mr. Woods we talk to.”

“That’s something else I’d like to speak to you about,” Mrs. Feldman brought up, shaking her head at Gregory’s crudeness, “Gregory’s language is not acceptable. He uses a lot of swear words and vulgarities. Such rude language isn’t tolerated in this classroom or this school.”

“That tends to be normal for Gregory,” Miss Afton sighed in exasperation and looked to her son, “Could you tone it down for school at least?” Gregory made a face at her. Mrs. Feldman was not impressed with the display.

“It would probably be better if we knew where he was learning such language and removed that bad influence,” she suggested to Miss Afton. Clearly the young woman was too innocent to have taught her son these behaviors so the only influence that could be responsible was…. Mrs. Feldman snuck another look at Mr. Herrera who only looked back at her with a deadpan expression. Still unresponsive to everything? Probably didn’t even think he had any responsibility for a kid that wasn’t his. “Do you have anything to say about this, Mr. Herrera?” she asked him crisply.

The man just raised an eyebrow at her before lifting a hand, held it flat like he was about to do a salute, then slashed it sharply under his chin. That looked threatening. Was he threatening her?! Alarm rang in her mind as Miss Afton turned her attention back.

“Oh! Sydney uses sign language to communicate, I keep forgetting to let people know that,” Miss Afton said with a sheepish laugh, “I’m too used to being able to understand him. Do you know sign language? Or can at least understand it? That would make it easier to speak with him directly. But I can translate for you!”

Oh. Oh dear. Mrs. Feldman felt her face heat up from stress and embarrassment. Had Mr. Herrera been staring at her to read her lips? How was she to know the man was deaf?! If people expect her to do her job right, they should tell her these things before she makes a fool of herself!

The man was making gestures at Miss Afton and the young woman was glancing between his hands and his face. Maybe she should have taken some classes on alternative languages, then she’d be able to understand some of what was being discussed in front of her. This felt awkward and a little rude, especially since Miss Afton’s open expression quickly became a faint scowl that was directed at her.

“Did you imply that Gregory swearing was Sydney’s fault?” she demanded and Mrs. Feldman shook her head.

“No, I simply wanted his input on this meeting,” she recovered smoothly, “Since he hasn’t said anything the whole meeting, I assumed he wasn’t as invested in Gregory’s upbringing and education as we are.”

“You assume a lot on very little,” Miss Afton said in a colder tone. She looked a lot less like the bubble-headed woman she first walked in as, and Mrs. Feldman swallowed a little.

The young woman reached into her purse again and pulled out another book, a copy of the school’s manual and regulations. She sat back in her chair and flipped through it idly. “Gregory drawing during your lessons is an accomodation, not a disruption, as outlined in section 3, paragraph 2,” Miss Afton began in a flat and toneless voice, her expression empty of the earlier cheer and brightness, “The lack of documentation in his record for this accomodation was an oversight that will be corrected. You’ll just have to deal with it. Gregory can try to curb his language use but there’s no guarantee he can stop entirely. At best, he’ll just make sure you’re not around to hear it and you can simply not be in places where he will be if you’re not necessary to be there.” She smiled, thin and sharp, “That way you can have plausible deniability within the guidelines of the school manual.” She made a small motion with her free hand in Mr. Herrera’s direction. “I’ll overlook your perceptions of Sydney but I can’t say the same for him. After all, your behavior was clearly a violation of section 1, paragraph 1 of this same manual as well as the official charter for the school. He’s within his rights to bring the matter to the attention of your immediate supervisor.”

That would be bad. She wouldn’t be let go, but she’d have a stain on her reputation in the school. Mrs. Feldman swallowed again, thinking of the looks she would get if that happened because she’d lost control of this meeting. How did this happen?! One minute she had everything well in hand and now it felt like she was facing some sort of corporate overlord throwing down hammers of legalese at her!

Mr. Herrera made a few more gestures that Miss Afton glanced over, her fingers twirling her hair idly, like she hadn’t a care in the world. Gregory just looked bored, but then it wasn’t his butt over the fire, was it? Mrs. Feldman looked between them all, holding herself stiffly. Was she about to get blackmailed? Was that it? Over something they just assumed she was thinking?!

“Hm,” Miss Afton hummed in interest before looking back towards Mrs. Feldman, “Sydney is willing to let things slide if you don’t look too hard at what Gregory does.” Her smile stayed in place but everything felt much scarier, darker, like Mrs. Feldman had stumbled into something she should not have. Could she call the police about this? And say what? “He’s just being a kid, drawing to help him keep his focus, and sure he says a few bad words but I’m sure these kids have heard worse on the internet. As long as he’s not using those words to hurt others, and dials it back in front of authority figures to blend in, it should be fine. Nothing against the manual.” Miss Afton waved the book tauntingly at her. “And maybe you should dial it back on being so judgmental. You’re here to teach kids and support them in education and socializing, not try to control how they behave to conform to your idea of how kids should be. Are we clear?”

Mrs. Feldman pursed her mouth tightly. No threats or anything she could take to the police, and if she tried to claim intimidation, the words were just about Gregory, and the only thing about her directly was that accusation. And if she admitted to that to anyone, she’d just as good as tarnish her reputation herself.

She was stuck, and from the looks of the matching smiles on Miss Afton and Mr. Herrera’s faces they were fully aware of it. She scowled and sat back in her chair. “I suppose we’re in agreement over Gregory’s accommodations moving forward, then,” she said, busying herself with straightening the papers on her desk. “That’ll be all for this meeting, thank you.”

“Pleasure working things out with you!” Miss Afton replied, returning to that bright and cheery tone she had when Mrs. Feldman first saw her as a silly blonde girl too naive to get a grip on her boy. How easily she fell for that front. Shameful!

“I told you she was out to get me,” Gregory chimed in with a roll of his eyes, as if he was the one who’d been suffering all this time. Miss Afton just sighed as she, Mr. Herrera, and Gregory all stood up to leave.

“Not everyone is out to get you,” she retorted and narrowed her eyes when the boy just raised a splayed hand, “That doesn’t count!”

“Therapy says it does.”

“Vincent also said you need a different therapist, so ha!”

The dysfunctional little family finally went out the door, leaving Mrs. Feldman in peace at last. She let out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding and finally relaxed. Frustrating as it was, she was probably better off just letting this slide for her own sake. Those two were still related to Afton Robotics, even if they didn’t seem interested in following the family business. A big enough donation from that company to the school with conditions tacked on could put undue stress on her nerves.

Perhaps she could retire soon and take a well-deserved vacation come summer? Yes, that seemed like a far more lovely idea.

.

-----------------------------

.

There weren’t many places where Therese and Enrique could sit for as long as they liked, watching people come and go, and muse to themselves about what kinds of lives they live. They’d done it through high school and college as a way to amuse themselves and come up with stories for their respective work interests, and now that they both had steady jobs in those fields it became a way of staying sharp. And it was just fun to do for the two friends.

“Ooh, I got held up in traffic on the way, what’d I miss? Anything delicious in the tea today?” Enrique gushed as he slid into the bench in Therese’s booth, a plate of vegan pizza and a salad on his tray. Therese slid the extra apple soda she bought in his direction as she glanced over the dining area to be sure everyone else was still in their places.

“There’s a family over there looking like they’re trying to put on a front for a mother-in-law, but they give each other death glares whenever she’s not looking. Maybe a plot to bump MIL off for inheritance money?” she began with a sly little smile. Enrique looked over at the family with a pout, slice of pizza in hand.

“Mm, kind of generic, expected even, not enough drama and pizzazz,” he remarked, “Let them cook a bit more. See if we can get something juicy. What else?” He bit into the pizza with a happy hum as Therese looked for the next scene.

“See that guy sitting in a booth by himself? Comes in, orders a personal pizza and a salad, then sits like the salad is for someone else he’s expecting to join him, but no one ever comes,” she pointed out subtly, “I’m thinking someone in denial that their lover is lost, never to join them for a meal again. Or someone who doesn’t believe they keep getting stood up for a date.”

“Ooh, that’s a little more like it~! Dash of romance, dash of tragedy,” Enrique sighed and fluttered his eyes, “Maybe one day, a cute someone slides into that seat at lasts and eats the salad with him?”

“You can have that one,” Therese offered with a flip of her hand, “Theatre scripts do better with more drama than that, but it seems right up your alley for a rom-com script.” She scanned the dining area as she took a sip of her diet soda, looking for other potential scene-setters. A flash of bright red caught her attention and her eyes zeroed in on the pizzeria’s owner/manager moving towards the front of the restaurant with Circus Baby at her side to greet a small group that just entered.

That was rare, to be personally greeted by the owner rather than the front of house staff, and with the star of the animatronic band, too. Therese glanced over the people that warranted such a greeting and her eyebrows rose. “Hey, that guy’s back!” she whispered excitedly to Enrique, flapping her hand to get his attention before he dove into his salad, “The one you totally had a crush on but then he, like, vanished for a couple years or something?”

“He didn’t ‘vanish’, he just got a job over at the Mega Pizzaplex before some sinkhole tore the place practically in half,” Enrique sighed with a roll of his eyes, face flushing at the reminder, “And it’s not a crush! I just wanted to know where he works out so I can get a membership there, too.”

“So how come you never asked when he worked here?” Therese asked him flatly, folding her arms over her chest.

“Cuz he gave me sleeper agent, retired assassin vibes!” Enrique protested, face still burning red and eyes bright with excitement, “What if me talking to him broke the vibe? How’d I live with myself if I ruined my best muse? You know how many good scripts I got out of just watching him work here? And I got a bonus from the script I wrote up when I saw him at the Pizzaplex!”

Therese knew about a couple of those scripts; she had traded a few romance concepts based on the co-owners of the pizzeria for some of those secret agent and assassin scripts. A little bit of a rewrite and they worked well for fantasy medieval dramas. She shook her head to clear her thoughts. “Yeah, well, apparently he’s back and he’s with that blonde guard from the Pizzaplex,” she pointed out and the two of them watched the young couple greet the pizzeria owner and Circus Baby. “She’s kinda pretty, in that ‘I don’t know what to do with my life’ kind of way,” Therese added.

“He’s got a different vibe,” Enrique muttered, squinting at the only man in the group of women. He blinked when the subject of his observation made gestures with his hands, the blonde watching him, then speaking to the others. “Huh, so he went from being careful with how he talked to people to just full on not speaking at all. Did something happen while he was working over at the Pizzaplex?” He grinned, “Hey, notice how close he is to his former work buddy there? Think they were more than just co-workers?”

“I dunno, they could just be friends like us,” Therese pointed out, stealing a slice of Enrique’s pizza and picking off the bell peppers.

“I’m gay, what’s his excuse?” Enrique huffed, jerking a thumb at himself. He fished a notepad and pen from his satchel, clicking once and scribbling on a fresh sheet. “Maybe they were investigating shady business practices in the Pizzaplex and grew closer under the pressure to discover what was going on, then something traumatic happens, maybe his newly beloved is threatened with harm, and the fear is so deep that he’s silenced to spare her life!”

“Hm, not exactly your usual rom-com,” Therese told him between bites of pizza. Enrique pulled his plate away from her with a scowl. “Also a little vague, you need to fill in more plot.” She looked back up, watching as Circus Baby excused herself and walked away, probably to get ready for the stage. It was almost time for the scheduled show.

The pizzeria owner started leading the young couple into the dining area and Therese and Enrique turned to their food, trying to listen without looking like they were listening in.

“So that’s the basics of how to start up a pizzeria. Didn’t think I’d be helping out new competition today when I woke up but you’re family and friends, after all,” the owner remarked, gesturing towards a nearby dining table. “Here, have a seat. At least let me treat you to lunch before you head back home.”

“Thanks, Meera. Hopefully our pizzeria will be successful enough that Sydney here won’t run off again,” the blonde woman replied gratefully before giving the man beside her a sly smirk, “He knows what’ll happen if he ditches us again.” Sydney just made a face and she laughed, bumping his arm with her shoulder.

“They’re totally boning,” Enrique whispered to Therese, smug grin on his face.

“Alex will be on break soon, so he can join you guys. Tío Lucian can handle security during the performance for a while,” the pizzeria owner, Meera, told the young couple, “I gotta get back to work but it’s really good to see you both again, without all the fighting. You’ve got a surprisingly good roundhouse kick! We should spar sometime!” Sydney’s expression grew wary and the auburn-haired woman laughed. “Relax! I’m asking Vanessa for a friendly spar, this isn’t me flirting. But I can totally flirt if you’re into that, ‘Nessa~.” She and the blonde laughed, playing it off as teasing while Sydney just rolled his eyes with a grin of fond exasperation.

“Your eyes are doing that sparkle thing again. Stop smiling so big, you’re gonna give us away!” Therese hissed under her breath, flicking the green peppers towards Enrique. Her friend was practically vibrating in his seat, pen scribbling furiously over his pad. He might have been going gaga over a fellow gay shooting her shot, but Therese was more interested in the supposed ‘fight’ the three of them had been in.

Did they throw hands somewhere? What for? What caused them to become friendly after the fact? Enemies to friends was a good trope for a lot of scripts, plenty of material there, and yes, a little romance there would be good to bring in the dating couples to the theatre.

Eventually, the pizzeria owner moved on and the day shift guard for the pizzeria came over to sit at the booth. Therese and Enrique squabbled a bit over the bowl of salad to keep up their cover of not-listening. Now that both men were at the table, it was easy to recognize the day guard as related to Sydney.

“Oh, that’s right. His little brother hung out here while he was working the day shift. Must’ve taken over the job when Sydney left to work at the Pizzaplex,” Enrique remarked with raised eyebrows. “Wonder if this place is hiring them as extra staff?”

“Sounds more like that Vanessa lady is opening her own pizzeria and Sydney’s working for her there. Ooh, brothers in competition! This should give some good material,” Therese murmured happily, taking her own notes on her phone.

“How are your ribs? Finally healed up?” the day guard asked his brother. Therese and Enrique listened attentively, curiosity ramped up by the questions. The guard was holding his phone up, angled to point the camera at Sydney’s hands as the older man gestured with them. “That’s good. You’re lucky you only got a little roughed up by that guy. My background check turned up some info on that client,” the guard, Alex as the pizzeria owner said, explained in a lowered voice, “He’s apparently an admirer of your past self. You showing up as Pantera was practically his idea of a gift from on high for his collection.”

Sydney just face-palmed while Vanessa scowled, cheeks puffing indignantly. “He can’t have him! I hold Sydney’s contract, so I’ve got legal on my side!” she huffed. The three fell into silence as a waiter came by and delivered a large pizza and drinks for them.

“Just saying,” Alex picked up the conversation once the waiter was gone, “if you go back out again as Pantera, steer clear of that guy. I doubt he’ll just give up on you now that he’s convinced himself you’re somehow a descendent of yourself. Those eyes of yours are too unique to not have been ‘inherited’.” The brothers cringed at his words while Vanessa just pinched the bridge of her nose.

“This reminds me of how Afton thought my body would be perfect for Emelia just because I have green eyes like her,” she growled, “It’s stupid. These are our lives! Our identities!”

“Welcome to the paranormal dumbfuckery club,” Alex quipped, uncapping his bottle of soda, “Where our eyes get us into trouble and our souls are the ball in a decades-long game of keep-away from some dipshit who couldn’t handle competition in business. Sydney, stop looking guilty; you didn’t start this shit, you got taken advantage of just like the rest of us.”

Therese and Enrique stared at one another with wide eyes. Whatever was going on with those three, there was just so much juicy gossip, even if stuff didn’t make any sense. Something like this would make for a great thriller, an action movie script maybe, something with suspense and intrigue. Change some names and ages around, fill in the blanks and smooth out the stuff that doesn’t make sense, this could be another good pitch.

“This one would be good for a summer action flick,” Enrique muttered, rubbing his chin thoughtfully as he tapped his pen against his pad.

“I dunno, this almost feels too bizarre to be real,” Therese murmured, squinting at the notes on her phone. “Are we being fed bullshit?”

“If it is bullshit, it’s still nourishment for the garden of plot ideas,” her friend countered, scribbling down another idea. “Could do with a role reversal, woman rushing to rescue her kidnapped man from some mafia boss with a thing for mysterious idols. Is that too tacky?”

“We got a lot of good advice and tips from Meera on opening and running a pizzeria, so we should be set on that front,” Vanessa said brightly, clapping her hands together, “No one’s going to be running off to do mercenary work any time soon, got it?”

“I didn’t even get to do anything!” Alex complained while Sydney just flashed a thumb’s up while grabbing a slice of pizza for himself. “All I’ve done so far is just secure our networks here at the pizzeria and at home so it’ll be harder for us to get tracked. Hacking the Pizzaplex network was the closest I got to my old work, and even then the asshole got further in that than I did!”

“Well, now you’ll get to secure the network for our pizzeria, too,” Vanessa told him and looked down at the pizza. “Uh, what kind of pizza is this? Looks like something we served at El Chip’s.”

“Taco pizza. It’s one of the asshole’s ideas for a signature dish,” Alex sighed, pulling a slice out to eat, “Don’t tell him, but it actually does taste good. I just don’t wanna give him the satisfaction of knowing I said that.”

“Bored now,” Enrique mumbled around his straw as he took another drink of his soda. Therese nodded in agreement, tapping out some more notes about a potential script idea with a jealous king and a clever knight and a princess caught in a trap. “I got a lot of great material to work with though. You?”

“I think I’ve got enough to create a full schedule of shows. Same time next week?” Therese asked as she got up and flicked through her wallet to leave a tip. Music began drifting from the stage as the curtain rose, Circus Baby stepping out in a strut to the beat. “She’s circus themed but I swear some joker programmed her to perform like a flamenco dancer,” she remarked with a squint at the animatronic swirling on stage with rapid steps and taps.

“Not like the kids watching her would know the difference. Yeah, same time next week,” Enrique replied and walked off cheerfully, “I’ll pick up the tip next time! Get that bag, girl!”

Therese gave the group at the nearby booth one last glance before shouldering her bag and heading out. Whatever was going on with them sounded pretty bizarre for such a normal-looking bunch, but it wasn’t her problem anyway. People watching today brought in a rich bounty of script ideas. Maybe she should keep an eye out for when this new pizzeria would open and add that to the list of places she and Enrique hit up for ideas. Wouldn’t do to let a fountain of inspiration disappear on them again.

.

--------------------------------------

.

“Huh, that the new kid over there?” Toby asked over his lunch of burger and fries, blinking at a pair of figures sitting at a table near the cafeteria exit. His companions turned to look as well before returning to their own food.

“That Gregory guy? He’s been here a couple weeks already so not that new,” Christine replied flippantly, swinging her legs as she dipped her fries into her cup of ice cream to eat. “Kinda cute in that ‘I can fix him’ sort of way. Cassie hangs out with him and I heard from Millie who heard from Bobby who overheard them talking about the Pizzaplex one time that that’s where they met so him saying he just moved here last month is a total lie.”

“Why would he lie about when he moved here? This place is the most boring town in the world. Like nothing happens here,” Frank complained, eyeing her fries with disgust.

“What about all those people that kept disappearing from their houses or the Pizzaplex or that one game studio or a whole pizzeria just up and vanishing overnight?” Toby pointed out dryly.

“Conspiracies! No way can so many people just vanish and nobody does anything about it or looks into what caused it!” Frank shot back and folded his arms over his chest, wrinkling his immaculately pressed shirt. Toby and Christine shared a look over their milk cartons; it would just be a matter of time before he complained about that too. “Anyway, what if he’s under witness protection and had to lie about when he moved here to protect himself?”

“His name is Gregory Afton,” Christine replied sarcastically, “If that’s the name he gets under witness protection, they might as well pin a bull’s-eye to his back before letting him get on the bus.” She rolled her eyes and looked back over at Cassie rubbing Gregory’s back as the boy pressed his hands to his eyes and forehead. “Every time I see that guy, he always looks like he’s in pain. I hope he has medicine with the nurse for it,” she added with a concerned look.

“If his last name’s Afton, is he related to the company that made the animatronics for the Pizzaplex?” Toby mused aloud, “Maybe he knows when that place will reopen?” The other two kids shrugged, and he pouted. “You guys suck. That place was awesome and then it closed down and got swarmed by cops, and then an earthquake wrecks it more.”

“God, if you want pizza and animatronic entertainment so bad, just go to Circus Baby’s,” Christine told him in annoyance, “The food actually tastes like the cooks give a crap and Circus Baby takes song requests if she’s in a good mood.”

“She never takes any of my requests,” Frank grumbled as he looked down at his wrinkled shirt in distaste and Christine rolled her eyes again.

“No duh. You keep asking for anime songs from a clown performer,” she replied dryly, “She looked like she was five seconds away from kicking you in the head and I would have cheered her on. Listen to Hatsune Miku on your phone; don’t traumatize the robot.”

Chairs scraping the floor pulled their attention back to Cassie and Gregory, and the three of them watched as they left their trays on the table. Gregory had one arm slung across Cassie’s shoulders, the girl helping him stay upright as he clutched at his head with a grimace. Side by side, they shuffled through the exit, slipping out of the cafeteria and probably heading for the nurse’s office.

“Y’know, he showed up here after the Pizzaplex closed and got hit with the cops. Think he had something to do with that?” Toby questioned thoughtfully.

“He’s a kid like us,” Christine told him flatly and pointed her dipped fries at Frank, “Don’t start sounding like him.”

“What if he’s actually a robot who ran away from the Pizzaplex?” Frank whispered in dawning horror, eyes wide and distant. Christine looked at him in disgust before shooting Toby a glare.

“You set him off again!”

“Sorry. But at least we’ll have something for our podcast after school?”

“It’s going to sound so dumb. If we go on the internet and say Gregory’s a secret Afton robot, we’re gonna lose so many listeners. Who would actually believe that?!”

Toby shrugged at her deadpan expression, a mischievous grin on his face, “It’s just a theory.”

[hell0mega]

so i finally watched the Barbie movie, and it was... good. like, i really enjoyed myself, it's very funny, it's acted well, it LOOKS amazing.

but... am i the only one who feels like the script should've had, like... another good month or two to cook?

and i don't mind the lack of explanation. like, it never explained why Barbieland is this, like, weird demiplane connected to Earth and the Barbies are real and not only can they go to the real world and function basically as people, but real people can also travel to Barbieland. it was one of those things where i could easily go, yeah, sure, whatever. like, maybe they could've fleshed that out a bit, but it didn't distract me enough to say that would be necessary

but I'm talking about the actual plot, and the message of the film. it felt... clunky. I've seen people criticize it for being "intro feminism" but i don't even think it's that. i want to watch it again and have a more detailed and in depth analysis, but i remember a few things that bothered me. the idea that the deconditioned barbies used their wiles to make the kens jealous and turn on each other in order to defeat them felt... bad. the way the film said "manipulative women win" felt SO icky, especially how that was just kind of accepted and worked just fine and wasn't called out. and the way that Ryan's Ken was like "i thought it was all about horses anyway" yet the concept of men finding community with each other over common interests was never seen as a positive topic to explore, and it just all came down to oppressing the Barbies.

the whole movie implied that this is what the world would be like if the roles were reversed, right? if women were the one in charge and men were put down and subservient. yet all the kens were dumb, and ignorant, and only cared about the attention from their Barbies. and at the end, president Barbie said "maybe things shouldn't go back to the way things were" and the film recognizes that the kens were bad off... but then made the joke that they were "not ready" for equal representation? "maybe someday" a ken can be in the supreme court, but for now, they have to learn, and they're gonna have to work their way up. if we flip that metaphor and apply it to real life, flip the roles... that feels disgusting. you can't have a reverse metaphor and put down men at the same time. the reason why women haven't had equal rights is exactly this narrative, that they weren't "ready," that they were ignorant or dumb, that they wouldn't use their rights or power "correctly," and that's exactly what the film said about the kens. and it was a joke! funney!!!

it felt like they had this basic idea for the movie and did the worldbuilding centered on the fact that they're dolls and ken is just There while they're a million barbies with a bunch of different careers. and then when they tried to come up with a story, they had to shoehorn in the feminist stuff... and it just did not land for me. if they wanted this to have been a feminist piece for the ages, they should've started there.

I'm actually surprised at the lack of analysis and criticism I've seen of the actual story of the movie. I'm sure it's out there, but i haven't done across it. i know this was written just after covid, and it was written during the worst time to be a writer if we consider the timing of the strike. but... i still wish it had been edited. i think it would've fared much better had they've consulted with feminist and gender study scholars. i think it would've led to a much better lesson and a much tighter script.

[sshbpodcast]

Discovery Season 1: Our best first season since TOS?

By Ames

Now that we’ve caught up to streaming Trek here on A Star to Steer Her By, we’ve got a lot to say about Star Trek: Discovery. And perhaps controversially (and yet not surprisingly), we’ve got to admit that its first season is one of the strongest first seasons of the franchise. Now to be fair, that’s not actually saying much. You’ll remember that the first season of TNG was boring at best and cringey at worst; DS9’s first season, while fine on its own, doesn’t hold a candle to the rest of that series; Voyager was still getting its legs under itself; and Enterprise… well the less said about Enterprise, the better.

But just on its own, early Discovery sashayed onto the scene with a lot of noteworthy elements, some good and some more subject to debate and personal tastes. In lieu of our normal top and bottom episodes of a given season, the SSHB hosts are going to go through individual highlights and lowlights of our Klingon War season. So read on below and listen to this week’s commentary on the podcast (jump to 1:17:26) to see if committing mutiny is a good thing or a bad thing, or somehow simultaneously both!

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Highlights

New designs are drool-worthy The very first impression that we get of Discovery—even before the show’s premiere if you’d been watching trailers and behind-the-scenes news—is that it’s super pretty. While there are definitely cinematic elements that may not have been fully necessary (more on those below), having the show look like a movie sure does come with some benefits. We’ve discussed some of them before. The uniforms are swish. The ships are very nifty. The mirror universe uniforms are stunning, even if they don’t reflect the prime universe at all. We even didn’t hate the Klingon redesign like so many neckbeards out there wouldn’t shut up about.

Look at this cast! There isn’t a weak link in this bunch, which isn’t something we’ve said about any of the other casts to date. The acting chops of all our main cast members are off the scale with this show, and they all suit their characters so well. And how are they all so hot? That’s not even fair. Call us, Ash Tyler.

Michael Burnham fulfills her character arc At the show’s forefront (perhaps too much in the forefront?) is our lead, Michael Burnham, who starts off the show as someone who done fucked up. Mutinying against captain Georgiou in “The Vulcan Hello” was a heckin’ choice for our protagonist, but watching the serious acting chops of Sonequa Martin-Green bringing her character full circle by the end is a very Trekky move. She avenges Georgiou’s death by killing Kol in “Into the Forest I Go” and redeems herself for the most part by standing up to Cornwell and refusing to genocide the Klingons in “Will You Take My Hand?” Badass.

Saru comes out of the gate swinging Perhaps the biggest standout character on the show is also the tallest. Doug Jones’s portrayal of Saru made him an instant fan favorite, and the new race of Kelpiens was intriguing from the start. While we didn’t care for “Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum” terribly much as its own episode, we did appreciate seeing the depths of Saru’s character and the constant unease he lives with that he hides behind compassion, professionalism, and sass. Mostly sass. When he takes command of the ship after Lorca’s identity has been revealed in “What’s Past Is Prologue,” it feels like a true victory for the Trek ethos.

Tilly grew on us quickly Sylvia Tilly started out OBNOXIOUS, as if the writers wanted a quirky character but didn’t want to do the actual character work. I can’t tell if they thought they were being funny or what. But once they calmed the hell down with the Tilly-mania, her character seemed to settle on first being a good person. Watching this sweet summer child flip the script and play Captain Killy in “Despite Yourself” is that much more impactful once we’ve started to understand her. And Tilly sitting with Tyler in “The War Without, the War Within” is pure goodness (though they rather over-egg it by having everyone else join in).

Lorca is a different breed of captain Before we learn Gabriel Lorca’s true identity, he is already a fascinating character. Like Sisko during the Dominion War seasons of Deep Space Nine, he’s an officer in the impossible position of leading during a time of war, pushed to the brink and putting Starfleet morals on the line. And yet he’s still somehow more likeable than Jonathan Archer. While the reveal that he’s actually from the mirror universe kinda sacrifices any further character development for mirror-universe levels of mustache-twirling evil, it still feels like the culmination this captain was heading toward.

Sarek is a bad dad in every universe While one could argue (and many many have!) that this show had no good reason to be set in prequel territory instead of somewhere in Trek’s future, its placement in the timeline does one satisfying thing: it explores the nature of Sarek. We learn in “Lethe” that those racist Vulcans gave this daddy an impossible choice by only permitting one of his abominable children to the Vulcan Science Academy. Sarek chose Spock, breaking Burnham’s heart even more than it was already. And it was all in vain anyway when Spock ran away to Starfleet like a rebellious teen! 

Starfleet stands on moral grounds Can we also just say that it’s nice to have a show whose morals feel like Star Trek again? Unlike Enterprise, which preached that the ends justify the means (even war crimes and genocide and some really immoral shit in season three), Discovery makes it clear to the audience that we should find Cornwell’s decision from “The War Without, the War Within” to try to genocide the Klingons to be reprehensible. Even during wartime, our main characters are hell bent on doing the right thing, whether that be in decisions like freeing Ripper in “Choose Your Pain” or trying to help the Terran Resistance in “The Wolf Inside.”

Trauma is given the weight it deserves Who in this season isn’t a broken husk by the end? Michael not only had a traumatizing childhood, but certainly didn’t deal with it well during her upbringing on Vulcan where, according to “Battle at the Binary Stars,” it looks like she mostly repressed everything. The whole crew is shouldering major losses from the Klingon War, notably Detmer whom we see has visible injuries from an attack. But the embodiment of pain this season comes in the tormented package that is Tyler/Voq, whom Cornwell uses her psychology background to help through a PTSD attack on the Sarcophagus ship in “Into the Forest I Go.”

Pow! Kick! Blam! Obviously, having Michelle Yeoh kicking ass at every opportunity is a straight-up gift, but even beyond that, the violence sequences are all excellently choreographed (as long as you aren’t watching the background too closely in that throne room battle in “What’s Past Is Prologue”). A personal favorite is the close-quarters turbolift fight between Michael Burnham and Captain Connor in “Despite Yourself,” which is so dynamic and unique that you can’t tear your eyes away. We even get some agonizing new deaths in “Vaulting Ambition,” like the severe use of defibrillator paddles on Captain Maddox’s head!

Our first [canonical] gay relationship It took you long enough, Star Trek! Finally, the franchise features an LGBT relationship that you can’t write away as being a weird Trill thing like in “Reunion” or some mirror-universe shenanigans like in “The Emperor’s New Cloak.” Paul Stamets and Hugh Culber’s relationship is treated like any other relationship, but its inclusion perfectly aligns with the values of Trek, which push for representation whenever it can. So seeing two men totally normally brushing their teeth together in “Choose Your Pain” says more than what is presented on screen.

Starfleet officers are clever Let’s round things out with just a couple specific moments of when the show was smart. We’ve got to give Burnham credit for figuring out that the tardigrade reacts to spores in “The Butcher’s Knife Cares Not for the Lamb’s Cry,” even if that doesn’t go well for Ripper. Stamets working diligently through the time loops to defeat Mudd in “Magic to Make the Sanest Mad Go Mad” is a lot of fun too. Michael also very cleverly gets the info about the Defiant over to the Discovery on Tyler’s body in “The Wolf Inside,” so full marks for her. The whole crew pulling together to make the 133 jumps in “Into the Forest I Go” is new and fresh as well. And finally, terraforming that planet with spores in “The War Without, the War Within” is a nice moment... even if it feels way too fast.

 —

Lowlights

Learn to pace yourselves! Probably the biggest issue we have with this series so far is its pacing. Whole episodes go by when nothing seems to happen (we’re looking at you, “Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum”) and then others where the audience is struggling to keep up. Furthermore, starting the show with the two prologue episodes “A Vulcan Hello” and “Battle at the Binary Stars” makes for weird structuring which kept us that much further from getting into what would be the actual plot, the actual characters, even the actual ship! Spending less time in Mirror World and concatenating some episodes might have helped, since we ended up with a sort of rush job by the time we get to “Will You Take My Hand?” in the same way we did in the finale of Deep Space Nine.

Too much Klingon being spoken On a much smaller scale, you know what else didn’t help the pacing? Whenever the Klingons talked! Who knew that creating a language that would intentionally be very difficult to speak fluidly would come back to bite the show in the ass? And we get it: it’s a window into the culture of an alien race who’s been here pretty much since the beginning and having them speak in their own tongue carries power. But goddamn does it get old fast. Just pull a The Hunt for Red October like everyone else does and be done with it.

Too many twists When plot elements happen just so we can get to the next twist, it’s a recipe for bad writing, which we get in both big character revelation scenes this season. When Tyler’s hidden Voq memories activate in “The Wolf Inside,” it’s because of the incredibly forced dialogue between Burnham and Mirror Voq, which they absolutely would not be having if the writers didn’t need someone to say “Kahless” a bunch of times. And then again when Burnham figures out Lorca is from the mirror universe in “Vaulting Ambition,” it’s such clunky writing that Burnham only pieces it together because they need her to for the plot.

Who even are these supporting characters? The whole bridge crew is a blip. I certainly didn’t learn any of their names on my first watch when Discovery was first released. Rhys and Bryce are interchangeable as far as I’m concerned. Owosekun is present but we don’t know a thing about her. Airiam seems to taunt us because we want to know what this robot-person’s deal is but we have no idea. Detmer might be the biggest wasted opportunity, as she is someone who also served under Captain Georgiou, but all she seems to ever do is sneer at Burnham from time to time and that’s it. Hell, by the denouement of the season, even Stamets and Saru have been shoved into the background again!

The Discovery bridge is too big and dark Perhaps this actually contributes to how we don’t get to know the bridge crew at all: they feel like they’re miles apart in this cavernous bridge set! The bridge is also so dark that I have no idea how they’re able to see their own consoles to get any work done. Why all this wasted space? Is it because the aspect ratio this season is 2:1 and they just wanted to stretch everything out? They practically have to shout across the void to each other when they get orders. Echo echo echo…

Dizzying camera tricks The hugeness of the sets and the dimness of the lighting lends directly to some unnecessarily fancy filming techniques. When you start to notice that the camera is rarely still, then you start to tire of all the unnecessary movement. Grabbing screenshots of this series is more of a pain because everyone’s always blurry or out of frame due to the constant movement. The worst offender definitely comes in “Despite Yourself” during that one technobabble scene. It’s a full minute of the camera spinning around the actors like you’re on a gravitron in an amusement park, really hoping you don’t hurl.

The idiot ball goes round and round Similar to the problem above of the plot twists needing a lot of counter-intuitive actions and leaps in logic to make work, there are even more cases of the characters having to do things that are out of character, out of place, or just plain stupid to advance the plot. Having breath scans in “Context Is for Kings” comes to mind because they’re a really bad form of security that only exists for Burnham to bypass it. Tilly not reporting Stamets’s OBVIOUS side effects from using the spore drive in “Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum” is another. And the same goes for Ash Tyler, who was clearly exhibiting PTSD all over the place in “Despite Yourself” and yet they keep sending him on missions.

Oh and literally everyone’s plans in the mirror universe in “What’s Past Is Prologue” are driveling nonsense. Lorca, what was your actual plan ever? Michael, are you really banking on beating up a roomful of enemies instead of coming up with something more clever? Heckin’ yikes.

Ellen Landry just sucks as a character Speaking of people holding the idiot ball. Ellen Landry gets her own entry because she was just terrible, especially in “The Butcher’s Knife Cares Not for the Lamb’s Cry.” Wowsers, what an awful character. When we meet her in “Context Is for Kings,” she’s just cruel and unlikeable, referring to prisoners as garbage and animals. And when she utterly disregards Burnham’s warnings about the dangers of poking the water bear, she unsurprisingly gets her ass killed out of sheer obstinance. Good riddance, bitch.

Well, that was convenient Similar to people holding the idiot ball to advance the plot are instances of overly convenient resolutions also to advance the plot. I’m thinking specifically of the goofy ending of “Magic to Make the Sanest Man Go Mad” in which Stella shows up for two reasons: a) for the reference of it all, and b) because they ran out of runway to resolve the plot. When you think about it, there are way better ways to wrap this thing up. I also find it cop-outy that the mirrorfolk’s light sensitivity is how Lorca gets outed in “Vaulting Ambition,” considering that was never something we’ve seen before. And what a shame that the ISS Discovery got immediately destroyed, ya know, lest they do anything cool.

I understood that reference! While there was less fanwank—like the afore-mentioned Stella dealy—than you’d expect from a prequel series, that’s not to say there was none. Which makes overt references stand out all the more, like Saru asking the computer for a list of captains the audience has all heard of before in “Choose Your Pain.” Obviously the whole fucking mirror universe four-episode sidequest is purely for the fans to jizz about, like every time it was featured in Deep Space Nine, but here it’s jarring because Discovery tries to take Backwards Land seriously when that’s just impossible. And showing the USS Enterprise at the end of “Will You Take My Hand?”: WANK WANK WANK!

You did it because you could, not because you should Because this is the streaming era, you can get away with a helluva lot more in your series, what with their seemingly limitless budgets and content ratings that go up to eleven. But that doesn’t mean you have to include gratuitous content just for the sake of it, because that’s how it feels. When Tilly and Stamets say “fuck” in “Choose Your Pain,” it’s forced as… well, forced as fuck! It’s not something that seems natural in Star Trek. Same goes for the gratuitous titties in the rape scene in “Into the Forest I Go.” Not only does it just feel upsetting tonally, but nothing would change if either scene were omitted.

Well, that aged poorly Finally, we just need to complain about how the Elon Musk reference in “The Butcher’s Knife Cares Not for the Lamb’s Cry” didn’t age well. Maybe this nazi-saluting billionaire seemed like more of a visionary and less of a lunatic despot at the time this came out in 2017, but that just goes to show that you should never meet your heroes because they will disappoint you, and then cut funding to a lot of necessary government agencies. Except for Stephen Hawking in “Descent” because he was a treasure.

—

So while some of the structuring and storytelling could have been better, we’ll always find nits to pick—we’re Star Trek fans after all. Overall though, the first season of Discovery is hella intriguing. We’re excited to see where it brings us next (even though we might already know where it’s bringing us next). So make sure you’re following along with us to see what we think of the next jaunts of our spore-hopping ship over on the podcast at SoundCloud (or whichever app you like). You can also open your Lorca-brand fortune cookies with us over on Facebook and Bluesky. And please: stop spinning the camera for just a second so we can get off this ride and – BLEARGH!

[thewadapan]

God Help the Girl vs. the best musical of all time

Having read the withering remarks compiled for the Reception section of this film's Wikipedia page, and the chorus of voices on this site echoing the idea that it's a mindless mess, I was prepared to cringe myself out of my body when I finally sat down to see it.

So now that I have… I'm sorry, remind me, what was your problem again? Push that "Keep reading" button to eject and flip to "Side B" of this post to find out what I thought.

Stuart Murdoch's script here is patently the work of a talented writer; key songwriterly instincts of narrative economy and impressionism are put to good use in communicating the unmoored experience of young adulthood. The film flits through a series of disconnected situations, carefully chosen to show the characters changing, but also often to demonstrate their stasis. Many important events are communicated solely in the music videos which punctuate the narrative; a song will end, and you'll realise months have just passed.

The film's first act is predominantly focused on the main character of Eve, who's been committed to a psychiatric hospital in an attempt to treat her anorexia. Many reviewers have criticised these scenes as being utterly disjointed from the rest of the film, claiming that the narrative has nothing to say about mental illness and no interest in meaningfully exploring the topic of anorexia—or even, that it glorifies anorexia! I feel pretty comfortable saying these viewers really did just miss the point. The core of Eve's character is her striving to escape the prison of her illness. She escapes using music. She physically escapes by sneaking out of the hospital. Her every interaction with James is coloured by her obvious unwillingness to talk about herself or acknowledge her situation.

Anyone with a shred of empathy can watch this unfolding, and sympathise with Eve's attempts to forge any kind of identity for herself outside of disorder. And of course, when her avoidance of the issue reaches a breaking point, and she relapses, it permanently changes her relationships with James and Cassie. I felt that it was a remarkably nuanced and empathetic portrayal of dysfunction.

An even more spurious criticism I've often seen levied at this film is simply regarding the kind of people it's about: namely, artsy-fartsy straight white English kids living in Scotland, as opposed to… well, anything more diverse than that. And like, if that's not you, of course the events of this film might fail to connect with you. But it's obviously drawing from someone's lived experience. It's clearly a personal story set in a specific place, during a specific time. I can make those claims without having done any more research than just watching the film itself, but to satisfy your curiosity, I've just looked it up, and yeah, writer Stuart Murdoch did in fact spend years struggling with isolation as a result of chronic illness. I'm not gonna rag on the guy for writing what he knew; if you want a story about entirely different kinds of people, that's fine, but that's an entirely different story that would be better-told by someone else entirely. Go find it and don't lose sleep over this one.

It's obvious that the plot of God Help the Girl was largely reverse-engineered from the songs that comprised the musical project of the same name. There's a song called "Pretty Eve In The Tub", so the protagonist is called Eve. There's a song called "I'll Have To Dance With Cassie", so another of the characters is called Cassie. Often, the music videos take a laughably literalist view of the lyrics, a kind of audiovisual word-association, which is what will most likely tip you off that these were all pre-existing pieces, rather than musical numbers written specifically to fit into the narrative.

Nowhere is this more apparent than in one of the film's best numbers, "The Psychiatrist Is In", which as originally written, seems to be sung from the perspective of a therapist, albeit with a sardonic thread of scepticism towards the profession keeping it within the worldview of God Help the Girl. In the movie, it's Eve herself who sings, and the song is contextualised as this offbeat pseudosexual roleplay she carries out with James. By firmly grounding it in Eve's perspective, in the context of the film, it takes on new meaning as part of her attempts to reclaim her traumas and seize agency; no longer the patient, but the doctor. Again, to disastrous result.

Shortly before watching this film, I saw Singin' in the Rain—sometimes hailed as the greatest musical film ever—for the first time. I'd seen clips from the film, and thought the songs were fun. But actually checking out the film in full, I was shocked to see that almost every single number is borderline irrelevant to the plot. It's not so much that the plot is an excuse to justify the songs; rather, the songs just occur at random points in the narrative, expositing repetitiously on topics which are tangential at best, with the most egregious example being a thirteen minute song-and-dance interlude framed by the characters saying "by the way, here's an idea we have for an unrelated musical". I haven't bothered writing a full review for that one, because I'd just be repeating the exact same points I made when I wrote about My Fair Lady, which is the exact same thing but somehow even more abominably classist and misogynistic. My point is that God Help the Girl, despite being entirely reverse-engineered around its songs, and for all the criticism levied at it, manages to be a much, much better musical than one of the most acclaimed musicals of all time. I'm not even going to couch that in subjective terms; it is plain as day, on a technical level, that one story functions as a musical, and the other simply does not.

Something I loved about this film was the way it toed the line between the perspectives of Eve, putting her all into music, and James, down bad for Eve. The film positions both James and his romantic foil Anton (who Eve actually enters a relationship with) as men who attempt to assert ownership over Eve in their own ways; much like the hospital, I guess! "Pretty Eve In The Tub" may be one of the film's most annoying songs, but god damn, those shots of James at the end of a long line of anonymous men queuing up outside her door hit hard. It's not nearly so straightforward as to actually make James a villain in Eve's story; we can see how their inability to be truthful with one another damages their relationship in the long run. One of the most heartwrenching bits of the movie is when James admits that he was the one who had to bring Eve to the hospital following her relapse, and she doesn't even remember, and you can see written on his face the noxious cocktail of concern and frustration one feels after being a bystander for long enough.

And although she doesn't get nearly as much depth as the other characters, I also really enjoyed the presence of Cassie from Skins in this flick.

So yeah, this film worked for me as a character study, as a period piece, as autobiography, and as a musical. It's not my favourite film ever, but I can see why it might really connect with some people.

But I will say, it's a crime that this film only includes a single verse from the titular song. It's such a banger! Why wouldn't you throw the whole thing in there!

Rating: 8/10

If you’ve enjoyed this review, you can find dozens of similar essays over on my Letterboxd account.

[nel-world]

hi

INT. THEATER LOBBY - NIGHT

Kathy is seated at a table, flipping through a script, deep in thought. Nick approaches, holding two cups of coffee.

Nick: You ever get those nights where sleep just isn't an option?

Kathy: (smirking) Every writer's nightmare.

Nick: (noticing the script) What’s that you're working on?

Kathy: (flashing the script) My latest insomnia cure.

Nick: (sitting down) Mind if I take a look?

Kathy: (hesitant) Sure, but it's still a mess.

Nick: Aren't they always?

INT. REHEARSAL SPACE - DAY

Kathy and Nick are discussing a scene. Kathy is pacing, script in hand, while Nick leans against the wall.

Nick: What if we add a flashback to that scene?

Kathy: A flashback? Feels a bit cliché, don’t you think? Plus, it might disrupt the flow.

Nick: True, but it could add depth to the character’s backstory. We just need to find the right moment.

Kathy: (considering) Hmm, maybe if it’s subtle... Let’s give it a try and see how it feels.

INT. CAFE - AFTERNOON

Nick and Kathy are sitting at a table, discussing their play. Kathy sips her coffee thoughtfully.

Nick: A museum? I thought you preferred more avant-garde settings.

Kathy: Normally, yes. But this place has an atmosphere that's perfect for what I’m envisioning.

Nick: (nodding) Alright, let's check it out.

INT. THEATER - NIGHT

Kathy is adjusting the lighting on stage. Nick enters, looking remorseful.

Nick: About earlier, I know I’ve been wrapped up in my own stuff.

Kathy: It’s fine. We both have our passions.

(A beat)

Nick: Let’s make this work, together. I want to see your vision come to life too.

Kathy: (smiling) Alright, let's do it. But no more solo missions, okay?

Nick: (grinning) Deal.

INT. THEATER - NIGHT

Kathy and Nick are sitting on the stage, the theater empty. Kathy holds an old photo.

Kathy: I used to perform in my high school plays. It was my escape.

Nick: (smiling) I bet you were great. For me, writing was my escape from a chaotic home.

Kathy: (softening) I didn’t know. We’ll make it the best it can be, for him.

INT. REHEARSAL SPACE - NIGHT

Kathy and Nick are working late. Their disagreement earlier led to a tense rehearsal, but now they're finding common ground.

Nick: I was thinking about the flashback. What if we tie it into the character’s motivation?

Kathy: (nodding) That could work. It would make the scene more impactful.

Nick: Exactly. Let’s try it out tomorrow.

Kathy: Sounds good. (pausing) Thanks, Nick. For pushing me.

Nick: We push each other. That’s what makes us a team.

EXT. THEATER - NIGHT

Kathy and Nick are locking up the theater, walking out together.

Kathy: You know, I never asked. Why is this play so important to you?

Nick: My dad... he always believed in my writing. Before he passed, he made me promise I'd get this play done. It’s my way of honoring him.

Kathy: (softening) I didn’t know. We’ll make it the best it can be, for him.

Nick: (smiling) Thanks, Kathy. That means a lot.

INT. THEATER - NIGHT

Kathy and Nick are having a breakthrough moment. They're excited, scribbling notes and ideas on a whiteboard.

Kathy: I think we finally nailed it.

Nick: (grinning) Yeah, we did. This is going to be amazing.

Kathy: Together.

Nick: Together.

[eyesontheskyline]

Love your work, you’re an incredible writer and it’s always a good day when you post 🫶🏼 I’m intrigued on a couple of things. Firstly, who do you find the hardest to write in character? Your characterisation is brilliant so I’m curious as to what you found the hardest?

Also what is your process during writing in general. I appreciate that with no such thing you had the episodes to flip, but when you’re scripting AU how would you go about doing so? I know some word vomit (I mean this nicely) and then mould away whereas others go with a rigid structure.

You’re exactly the kind of writer that inspires me to write myself… but also the kind of writer I’m forever envious of because of your effortless writing style haha!!

Aaahhh this is so kind, thank you! (Sorry in advance, this got long.)

So who do I find hardest to write in character... Out of everyone, JJ, definitely. The rest of them, I feel like the rhythm of their speech is distinct and I know when I've got it. (Obviously someone else might disagree with that and think I'm doing a terrible job of someone else lol, but I feel like I know when it feels right to me, when I can hear it in their voice in my head.) And I'm like, reasonably confident about how they'd react to a situation or etc - although that's obv very open to interpretation, and I'm aware I'm sometimes leaning into a fantasy a bit. But JJ... I don't know if I know her well. I don't know if the writers know her well, honestly. So I always struggle a bit with her.

Process is... mixed? With no such thing I figured out the relationships that were most important to me to 'fix' or develop and then what beats I wanted to hit to get there. For example, I hate that Emily spends S7 trying to win Morgan's trust back without ever finding out about the shitty things he said about her in Lauren. So I wanted her to hear about it, confront him, and give her the chance to forgive him and for them to choose to move forward together even though things aren't quite the same. I hate that Reid just acts out like a little kid about Emily's death / return and then that's that, but then when Emily comes back in S12 it feels like they're on a much more equal footing - so I wanted to give him the chance to be an equal adult in their friendship, because he absolutely has the capacity for that level of empathy, and that depth of love for Emily, and the writers just defaulted to babying him a lot. So I started with those ideas and literally rewatched all of S7 while taking notes then figured out the beats I needed and where to fit them in. (Stupid amount of detail, sorry, but doing it this way meant I didn't get caught up in trying to write around every 'missing scene' or feel pressure to address every single episode equally, which is the mistake I've made trying to write alongside canon before.)

My current WIP reckless (just enough) started out as 'I haven't written pregnancy / birth since doing it, maybe it would be good to try that', and then I also had a vague 'what if Emily was pregnant when Doyle was arrested' thought, and then thinking about how that would change the choices she made when he escaped made me think of doing it as a three part thing... From there, I started trying to write a detailed outline but I kept getting myself lost in the weeds, so I started just writing. There was a lot more trial and error this way - like writing entire scenes and then realising they were completely useless and scrapping them, which I did some amount of with no such thing (and also someone else's solid ground), but definitely less.

The ending of the final part is still unfinished and kind of in the air - it's out of my comfort zone tonally, and I just can't really figure out the transition from where I am to where I'm trying to be. (The solution to that problem is nearly always reworking the thing before the part I'm stuck at but I've tried that about 10 times so far, so... we'll see. Help lol.)

So yeah, I'm word vomiting this time, and I word vomited someone else's solid ground pretty much entirely - that started from like two lines of dialogue and a vague idea of how I felt their characters had grown since we last saw them together and 'I haven't written smut in a while, I wonder if that's a thing I can still do'. If I need a plot-shaped plot, I need to outline.

Write!! Do it!! And please know that effortless is not the word for my writing loool, I put a ridiculous amount of effort into this. And I edit a lot. I write terrible sentences, terrible scenes, I spend half an hour trying to get a character to move from one place to another or describe some specific action before it occurs to me (like it's brand new information every time) that I can just change it so they don't need to do the thing I'm struggling to describe... But once I'm in the rhythm of doing it, it becomes the thing my brain wants to do when I get a little bit of free time, and that's a fun place for me to be, and much healthier than all the 'how to be a perfect parent' facebook groups I squandered several years crying over. I spent a few years without access to the writing part of my brain, and I'm just... grateful to be back here. I still feel rusty - I was getting to a point pre-pregnancy/pre-covid (unfortunately these are the same event for me lol) where I could be a lot more expressive with language than I am right now. I honestly feel like I'm struggling just with communicating ideas at this point - if I can make myself understood, it's a win, at the moment. But I'm so so glad to be working on it and to have people interested in reading my things.

So yeah please write if any part of you wants to write, and you'll get better as you go! And if you ever want to bounce ideas or scenes or whatever off anyone, I'm always open to talking with more people about writing and Hotchniss and Emily Prentiss loool.

[theharpermovieblog]

#HARPERSMOVIECOLLECTION

2023

MOVIES I HATE

I watched Halloween Ends (2022)

I eventually had to finish out this new trilogy after watching 2021's dissapointing Halloween Kills. My hopes weren't high for this, but somehow it still managed to severely disappoint me.

The Third installment of David Gordon Green's sequels to John Carpenter's Halloween.

Director David Gordon Green and writer/actor Danny McBride have done some good stuff together and are both very talented. When they rebooted the Halloween sequels by going back to the end of the original film and moving forward from there, they did a solid job of making an interesting and fun, if predictable, slasher film. The follow up, Halloween Ends, started off fun and brutal but quickly descended into a weirdly preachy, aggressively obvious and cringe-worthy statement about mob justice. With Halloween Ends, Green and McBride's sequel trilogy comes to, as the tile suggests, an end.

Why this third installment (that's technically a fourth installment) is jumping four years into the future and wasting our time introducing new characters, reintroducing old characters, rebuilding and reorganizing relationships and basically beginning the reboot again, is beyond me. When this film started, I thought maybe we were going to be jumping right back into the story, but instead this film starts unfolding into something wildly different. At this point in a series of films, it's annoying to have to sit through this much setup. This movie mostly revolves around an entirely new character. The survivors of the last film are here, but not the main focus and Michael Myers is barely in the film.

The plot of this movie is pretty terrible and needlessly convoluted. Basically a kid teams up with Michael Myers and starts murdering with him to gain his power to heal through murder. Are you asking, "What?" "Huh?" And "Why would I want to watch that?" The answer is, "I don't know." "I'm just as confused as you." And "You wouldn't."

This movie is boring and pointless on a lot of levels. It doesn't work within the context of the newer sequels, it doesn't work as a continuation of the original Halloween film, it doesn't work at all. It's trying to flip the script and be different, but it's aggravating to old school fans and must be confusing to new fans. What were Green and McBride thinking when writing this? It has no life to it, it has no fun, it has no scares, it has nothing except rehashed character arcs, some form of magical thinking which is trying to explain Michael Myer's powers (which can apparently be learned by other people) and a storyline I couldn't have cared less about because it deviates so far and pointlessly from everything we've watched up until this point. They wrote a script that blatantly shows that Michael Myers has magical healing superpowers and can't die and then gave those powers to someone much more annoying for most of the film.

I couldn't believe how stupid the story gets. How did we end up here? Why write this? It's not clever, it's not interesting, it's not smart. It's simply a waste of our time, until they decide at the very end to give us fifteen minutes with the killer we came to see. And even then he mostly is there so Jamie Lee Curtis can beat him up.

This sequel trilogy has been an incredible letdown. Like a shit that started out solid and turned into diarrhea. I really can't describe how bad this is or how much it doesn't work. Wow, that sucked.

[winchester-reload]

I have a few thoughts about the Winchesters finale, and though I wasn’t gonna weigh in on this, it turns out I needed to write this down to get it out of my head, so here we go.

I understand that Misha was approached to be included on the show and that there was a “scheduling conflict” that included multiple conversations with Jensen. Here’s my interpretation of that: 

I believe Cas was supposed to make a cameo in episode 13 to tee up the confession resolution—this was always the episode where they were going to crack open the “surprise twist” even before learning they would only get 13 episodes total. In the original scenario, episode 13 would have been the hellatus episode rather than a finale, leaving room for everything to come to a head with episode 22 instead. It’s then they would have given us the actual Dean and Cas reunion. This would have wrapped both stories nicely with each group going off into their own respective sunsets—their own happy endings, while still leaving all the room for the new crew to explore more seasons; all along, we see, The Winchesters was about Dean and Cas as much as it was about Mary and John.

When they didn’t get the back half of the season picked up, I assume they feared it would be more dangerous to show a Cas cameo without getting to address the confession, so Misha likely opted to be left out instead. With the only hint to Cas being Dean’s line that he was looking for his family when he found the Akrida, then directly drawing the parallel that Jack and Bobby were “family.” The core crew for Dean has always been Bobby, Sam, Jack, AND Cas. And he wasn’t looking for Sam because he was still on earth. So who’s left? You might be compelled to believe he was window shopping AU versions of his parents, but he confirms he ran into the Akrida in this world and then sought to interfere with the order by approaching John in an effort to prevent it from spreading to Sam's world. (Why Cas would be AU hopping, idk. The boy is really afraid of being shot down, I guess.)

It goes far to explain the vast narrative parallels we saw reflected in the Monster Club crew if it was intended as a setup for the confession payoff. It honestly doesn’t make a lot of sense otherwise. There’s no reason these people should be living Dean's experiences and regrets every episode unless the writers wanted the viewer to be thinking about the lessons and resolutions in how they relate to Dean too.

Additionally, as this has been a largely uncontested take, this is Jensen's well-funded fanfic come to life. Complete with the embracing of many of our favorite fanfic tropes and emphasized by Dean’s own words throughout the season. Because this is an obvious embrace of that “write your own story” fan side, I believe the reason Dean couldn’t even say Cas’ name in the episode is because they were going to change the spelling from “Cass” as it was in the show proper to the fan-adopted (and more accurate) spelling of “Cas,” which would have appeared in the subtitles and later the script pages.  And even that little thing right there would have been a huge giveaway to the whole game. And a very dangerous thing to do if there wasn’t going to be enough time for follow-through. 

But the truth is, this isn’t a game for many people, and the harm that can be caused by good intentions is just as real. It also begs the question: why should this be so difficult? The answer is it’s not. Edging forever isn’t fun. It’s torture. I understand there’s an art to storytelling, but your audience is weary, and trust has been violated too many times. Even still, the flip side of that coin is honest to god respect for DeanCas endgame means taking the story and the reveal seriously. It’s a tightrope walk. And one that Robbie somehow managed to keep balanced after the finale, without it falling either way.  Also we also need to consider the possibility that Jensen did pitch a full-on destiel love story spin-off but got shot down, opting to couch it in a more CW-branded world instead. He’s mentioned over half a dozen pitches were rejected. It's up to you whether you want to give him the benefit of the doubt on that.

But, I’m gonna be honest here, I don’t know that we will ever get that resolution we crave. Even Robbie confirmed The Winchesters were always meant to “go it alone” after the first season. It’s hard to imagine Dean popping in there to fuck around again after that handoff. But the dude is clearly a very restless sea-faring*, swoopy-haired mofo right now, so I’ll leave that one up to the SPN multiverse and the new Mr. Superwholock’s magical universe-traveling impala. (This show used to be about what again? *looks at notes*.) And FWIW, if they do get green-lit for a whole second season or are allowed to move networks, I believe a good-faith effort will be made to tie the narrative parallels we saw in season one to some real Dean and Cas resolution. If there gets to be a world where John *might* not turn into an abusive dick, then this possibility has to be true too.

For the record, I enjoyed The Winchesters, all the new characters, and the doors the finale opened for the possibility of more. I would have been fine half-watching it with no promises, empty head no thoughts, but I got my clown** suit on again, and though I mostly kept quiet, unlike last time, I did regrettably manage to drag a few friends down with me yet again.  Though the spec sessions were epic, and we did get some art out of it—it still rocks the boat when the base level expectations were only 1. Dean alive, and 2. seeing Cas again. 

But for anyone, like me, upset by the (likely unintentional) Cas-baiting or anyone still reeling about why this stuff can hit so hard, here’s an interesting article about the way our brains respond to fictional characters. Tl;dr: There’s nothing wrong with you. This is science. And while you’re at it, take a look at this article about the very real power of disenfranchised grief over character loss.

Ramble on, fam. And take care of yourselves.

<3 Jackie

*Um hi he appears as a sailor? Literally, on a show with a story Dean is writing whose audience is looking for a resolution to a conversation between two people who’re famously the “most shipped” characters of all time? That’s not an accident. That’s intentional. And it’s another reason why there might be a bitter taste in your mouth. These nods came without resolution, so it still feels dirty, despite the brilliant Easter egg.

**I hesitate to say “clown” here because the lesson on episode 12 was that the clowns were the ones who chose a self-induced limbo rather than face some personal hard revelations. That sounds more like a certain closeted character than it does the people cheering him on, and that felt like an intentional nod too.

***obviously, this is my own rambling spec as I try to reorder my thoughts in the wake of the finale.