#and i think steve would also struggle with this concept

[deviantnation]

I need Jonathan Byers 5 or 6 years later. I need him not going to univerity but living a life he's happy with regardless. He probably works a mundane job, maybe at a music store, or a thrift shop, but does photography as a freelance job on the side. But most importantly, I need Steve running into him and being confused as to why he feels things when he sees Jonathan with painted nails. They're probably chipped and black except for one singular thumbnail, which is blue. Steve also doesn't know what to make of it when he sees half of Jonathan’s hair dragged into a messy top knot. Let him be a little unhinged about seeing Jonathan, expressing himself in ways that Steve finds unsettlingly and decidedly feminine. Let him be further unhinged when Jonathan doesn't even seem to care.

[danny-doodles]

Steve’s Hobby

This is a short 2k blurb about one of my Steve hcs, I am only really good at critical analysis writing so I’m sorry if this is bad!! Creative writing isn’t my strong suit but I felt like I couldn’t really explain this hc in a drawing as well as writing it could.

Growing up Steve was often taught the importance of words from his father, thinking it would be useful for his son’s future in the business. Steve was never the best reader, letters jumping around the page made it too difficult, so instead he listened to everyone around him. Teachers, his parent’s coworkers, older kids, all of them taught him the importance of the meaning of words.

How certain words would make someone a town pariah yet others a god among men. Steve was a more quiet kid but as he grew up he also grew confident in his words. He could tear someone down with one sentence, ensuring they knew he was not to be messed with. That’s why he was so confused when he struggled in his english class, he knew the power of words and the many meanings, but his teacher never understood. Sure he made grammar errors, how no one else struggled with the dancing letters he didn’t get, but how could the teachers not understand his connections? Steve shouldn’t have to explain why the red of the handmaid’s cloaks represented the ripping of humanity from the women, it was so clear to him. Obviously the boar head could be comparable to the church, how could his teachers not make the connection?

Even Nancy didn’t understand, someone he considered smarter than him. He knew she was trying to be nice when she critiqued his college paper but it still left him in the fog. Basketball was war to him, a fight that was pointless with one but possible with many. A challenge that called for leadership and a strict order. Everyone had the roles, knew where and when to shoot, needed the ability to think quickly on their feet and not struggle under the pressure. Uniforms to not only separate from the enemy but to show they are a unit reaching for a common goal. It was so clear leaving no need to explain, especially to Nancy.

But she didn’t get it, no one got it.

Maybe he wasn’t as good with words as he thought.

Steve from then on fumbled his words when he got nervous, scared he would say something that made him sound dumb and point out his weakness with words. The concussions didn’t help either, making him take longer to grasp concepts. Reading felt nearly impossible, the headaches were unbearable. Not to mention the kids' comments, judgmental and brutal as if Steve didn’t have a reason to struggle in the first place.

Everyone around him loved to put him in a sudden spotlight and when he didn’t say the right line he was booed off stage and dealt with the looks of disappointment from his co stars for messing up. So Steve stuck to what he knew, his quick remarks. Were they bitchy? Yes, but not coated in malice like they used to be. Piggybacking off others points with sarcastic comments so the other person kept talking, anything to get the attention off him.

But Steve had a secret hobby that he shared with no one, not even with his platonic soulmate with a capital P Robin.

Steve wrote poetry.

Years of horrors that by law he couldn’t share that caused vicious nightmares and a clammy grasp on reality at times tended to keep Steve up. Another gift bestowed by his father though was a feeling of shame when sharing his emotions. Didn’t help that those emotions were typically down played or outright ignored by others. Therefore a bottle filled with his emotions rested in Steve’s chest, which after Vecna he really realized probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do. So Steve took to writing them down, but he did it for himself.

No need to explain everything, he knew what he meant, he knew every context of every word. He wrote on his experiences, his emotions. He wrote when he was happy, he wrote when he was sad. Steve wrote and wrote and found his love for words again. And god did it feel good, it felt like taking back his voice from a world that underappreciated it. In a weird way it felt like revisiting a relative he had last seen as a child, that sense of freedom and the loss of expectation because in their eyes he was still that little kid. All they wanted was to see someone they loved and to Steve the words welcomed him back with a hug that rivaled his Nonna Maria’s.

Steve would ponder over lines at random intervals of the day, biting his pencil between his teeth during the quiet hours at work or simply jotting down a line right before picking the kids up. Steve wrote so often he kept his small little notebook on him at all times, usually accompanied by a pencil bound to it with a rubber band. (Turns out having hearing aids and glasses made it really difficult to put pencils behind one's ears). At this point everyone had seen his notebook, pale blue with some star stickers because he never had a shortage of them. Everyone assumed it was for something different. Some thought it was grocery lists, to-do lists, something productive. Others thought it was like a pocket calendar with all his plans listed so he didn’t forget. Dustin insisted it was meant to hold the definitions of anything D&D related so Steve never forgot, meanwhile Robin argued it was to hold all the wonderfully obscure movie recommendations she loved to give. All of them were wrong though and Steve kind of adored it that way. He didn’t have to explain himself that way, he could continue to hide under the blankets. Steve no longer held his tongue out of fear of others but because he had an outlet he much rather prefer.

Listening now felt less like a pop quiz, waiting for him to mess up his response, it felt like an actual conversation. Steve may not speak up as much as he would have before the Upside Down but he fell back in love with his own voice and maybe one day he would feel confident enough to share it with the Party, but for now it was all his.

No matter how much they wanted to prove who was right, the kids and older teenagers never touched the book when it was rarely separated from Steve. Well...after someone tried to grab it and they learned they really shouldn’t touch it.

While at the Harrington house the Party were preparing for a campaign session when the argument about the pale binded pages was brought up again. Steve had left it on the kitchen counter while he went to the bathroom, and Mike decided he was done with the bickering. He shot up and went to retrieve and open the book but before he could grab it the book flew through the air.

All the heads turned and landed on El holding it in her hand, “We are not Steve, this is his. It is rude to invade his privacy, would you like me to watch you without telling you,” everyone quietly shook their heads, “Then we do not watch Steve without him knowing.”

That’s exactly when Steve walked back in, it takes one look across the room at all the embarrassed faces and El holding his book with frustration painting her eyes to know what had occurred while he was gone. He walks up, kisses El on her head and softly thanks her while taking back his little literature.

After that incident no one dared touch the book or face the wrath of their favorite mage. They would find out when Steve was ready for them to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That damn little book haunted Eddie’s thoughts. He knew Steve was not what he assumed him to be so anything was on the table, he had been wrong about the guy before who's to say he won’t be this time?

Of course Eddie wanted to respect Steve’s privacy because Eddie personally would be mortified if Steve had seen any of his notebooks, mainly because of the pages of lyrics that not so subtly hinted at an itsy bitsy affection for the badass babysitter. If that didn’t give Eddie away the random ‘Eddie Harrington’ and ‘Steve Munson’ with hearts all over would finish the job. So yeah, Eddie was not crazy to offer up any of his notebooks to venture into Steve’s book. He just had no idea the universe would present him with a much more favorable offer.

Steve and Eddie started hanging out a lot more after Vecna, no shocker considering they shared a hospital room, and soon the bat buddies would spend their time together outside of the hospital. That’s why it wasn’t surprising for Steve to let Eddie venture into Steve’s room while he went to pick up their lunch.

Eddie was somewhat of a curious cat, so when he spotted the notebook and some papers scattered on Steve’s desk he was like a moth to a flame. He softly glided his fingers over the blue cover and exhaled some breath in a soft laugh over the star stickers Steve oh so loved. It was the paper though that caught his eye when he finished observing the book. It looked like lyrics at first but then he realized some of the lines were too short to be lines, if anything they looked more like stanzas from a poem. Steve had poetry on his desk, did Steve read poetry? Thee Steve Harrington likes poetry? God his whole doctrine was garbage huh. Eddie moved the paper towards him and started to read.

Watchful gaze

Setules on the glass.

Wishful gaze

Silent pleas of escaping rolling in the mouth

Fingertips slipping through the veil,

Grasping for warm hands,

Receiving lukewarm.

Hesitant to grab.

Dependency clasping the palms

Such a feverish feeling

Poking at the appendages,

A coldness that numbs.

Gently gripping for the heat,

The balmy yields.

Smoke and simmers,

Arms rushing to sides

Frozen.

Yearning for ardor,

Turn not yet given,

Waiting for the impossible,

Waiting for the unobtainable,

So understanding.

So relieving.

So desperate.

So alone.

Standing for the calling.

So patient.

So pathetic.

Empty Hands by Steve H.

Eddie was staring at the very last line on the paper, utterly flabbergasted. Steve wrote this? Steve writes poetry?! Is that what resides in the little book? Before Eddie could even find the power to turn to the book to look, Steve walked into his room. Again a quick look is all Steve needed to take before he knew what happened in his absence.

“Oh! Uh..I’m guessing you read it.”

Eddie slowly looked back up while caressing the paper, “Yeah, you..um..you really wrote this? Is that…uh..what’s in your notebook? Cause I will admit I never would have guessed that.”

Steve started scratching his neck, “I don’t blame you,” he huffs, “But yeah I write poetry, helps to let some of the thoughts out considering our lives y'know?”

“I totally get it dude! Lord knows my lyrics are infected with the whole spring break bullhonkey. So..totally cool if you don’t want to tell me but, why is this one out of the book? Were you gonna write it into the book?” Eddie picked up the paper to place it next to the notebook and turned to face Steve.

“Actually I copied it from the notebook, I’m gonna, okay wait, you can’t tell anyone this-”

“Even Robin?” Eddie exaggerated his smile to look wild.

“Even Robin.” Steve nodded with his eyes shut.

Eddie put his hands together and swayed while standing, “Wowww look at me, lil old Eddie Munson getting to learn the secrets of the mysterious writer Steve Harrington.”

“Eddie, you want to know or not?” Steve sighed as he put his hands on his hips.

“Yes. Yes please,” Eddie eagerly replied, barely letting Steve finish his sentence.

“The last time I went to Indy with Robin to go shopping at their mall we went to a cafe. The bulletin board had a flier for a poetry night and I got curious I guess.”

“You gonna perform the poem there?”

“That’s the plan.”

Eddie could understand wanting a fresh slate when it came to having a reputation. “Craving anonymity? Must be tough considering you are Hawkin’s golden boy.”

Steve smiles brightly and Eddie sees his shoulders lose tension, tension Eddie didn’t even notice because he was so distracted by the fact that holy shit Steve is a poet. “Exactly.”

Honestly Eddie would give anything to hear more of Steve's hidden works, he grabs some of his hair and brings it to cover his mouth, “I know you don’t intend to tell the rest of the bunch, but uh..would you allow a humble bard to observe your lyrical performance?”

Eddie looks at Steve’s face for any hint of annoyance and finds none, instead he finds a look that he could hope to be correct in his guess is excitement.

“Really? You’d want to hear more, it's not confusing or stupid to you?” Steve softly smiled at Eddie, making him swoon inside.

“It's art! It doesn’t need to make sense, it just needs to make you feel good, who cares if others are confused. And for what its worth even if I’m not right on the money that poem made me feel Steve, I mean as the expert in self-expression it felt real and vulnerable, y’know.” Eddie had to shut himself up before he himself waxed poetry about just how much he is dying to hear more from Steve to learn more about him.

“Thanks Eddie.” Steve gazed at Eddie as if no one had ever told him that before. Which now that hes thinking about it that’s probably the truth. Guess Eddie needed to constantly remind him then.

Eddie smiled, mirroring Steves while bending at his waist, “Oh but of course my liege.”

“Oh my god okay Eddie cmon the food’s gonna get cold.”

Steve started to leave his room and Eddie rushed to follow him, “Now that I know what the book is filled with may I pretty please read it?” Rapidly blinking his eyelashes in an attempt to look innocent and pure but instead looking like a piece of dust got in his eyes.

“Nope.”

“Ugghhh c'mon Steve! Just imagine the look on the little hellions when they see me opening the book! God the jealousy! The feeling of betrayal when they see me reading Steve Harringtons’s treasure trove of text and they are none the wiser to what is inside. And the best part, I have permission! The power I would hold Steve! The possibility, I could use them like little puppets to do my bidding while they crave information I alone hold!”

“Eddie that sounds like a headache for me waiting to happen, they’re just gonna badger me to tell them because they would claim it’s unfair you know and they don’t.”

“Eh, their egos could take a little hit don’t you think?” Eddie was now resting his head on Steve’s shoulder as the younger started to bring the food out of the carry out bag.

“Can I read your lyric notebook?”

Eddie’s eyes went wide as his brain proceeded to remind him of every lyric he had written around his devotion to Steve. Red in the face Eddie responded quickly, “Nope! Mmm you smell that Stevie I’m so hungry, aren’t you?”

“Subtle Munson.”

“Tis my middle name.”

Steve fondly rolled his eyes, “Sure.”

As they settled down on the couch Eddie tracked Steve grabbing the remote, “So I can really watch you?”

Steve turned and looked at Eddie with a calmness on his face. “Yeah Eddie.”

Eddie grabbed his hair as Steve stared at him, “Cool, cool, it’s a date.” Eddie froze about to panic silently as he tried to fix his slip up.

“Yeah, it's a date.” The two looked at each other, neither wanting to look away. After a minute or so Steve turned on the TV and if the two fell asleep together it was their business.

[buckyalpine]

Hello, first I would like to say that I love your writing and it normally makes me really happy while I am at some boring classes at college, so thanks for that hahaha ❤️

Also, I saw your requests are open and since I am absolutely obsessed with your angst for bucky, I am here to request some.

My idea would be something like this: reader has been in the compound with the avengers for a while now and besides really caring for the team, she has some problems being more open with friendships and relationships in general, cause of some insecurities with her personality, but in somehow she feels really comfortable with Bucky and they are kinda of great friends?

And then she's just waking by the compound looking for him one day and she hears him speaking something bad about her? Something about how he feels like she's overwhelming him cause she just has him as a friend and no one else and it kinda makes her look for him a lot for comfort ( I actually have no idea what he could be speaking, so this is just an idea but it could be anything, really) maybe this could actually be a misunderstanding and he did not meant in that way? I would love if it had a lot of angst and a happy ending, but of course is up to you!

YES I live for miscommunication and comfort and this type of angst, this concept is everything!!

warnings: Angst, miscommunication, idiots in love/ friends to lovers, plenty of fluffff

-

"Hey sugar plum" You smiled, plopping beside Bucky on the couch while he scrolled through Netflix documentaries with a large bowl of m&ms in his lap. "Whatcha watching"

"Haven't decided yet, pick something Jellybean" He handed you the remote and candy bowl, throwing his arm around the back of the couch while you got settled in and flicked through the selection of tv shows.

"Of course" Bucky snorted, shaking his head with amusement as Unsolved Mysteries started to play. You grinned, comfortable nestled against his side while the rest of the team joined one by one; Sam swiped a handful of chocolate from the bowl only to have Bucky swat at his hand like a cat.

"Get your own candy pigeon pants"

"What, y/n gets some but I don't" Sam scoffed in fake offence while Bucky shrugged, throwing one at him.

"Well you're not y/n" Bucky shrugged while you felt your heart flutter. You loved everyone with your whole heart, you really did, but no one else made you feel safe the way Bucky did. Being around him felt like being constantly wrapped in a thick fluffy blanket. Ever since you had joined the team, you struggled to fully be yourself around everyone.

Not that anyone treated you differently; but being surrounded some of the strongest and most brilliant people on the planet gnawed at your insecurities. Steve was a sweetheart, Nat was incredibly skilled and drop dead gorgeous, Tony could charm his way out of just about anything. Everyone had something that made them exceptional and then there was you. You tended to be on the quieter side, fueled with self doubt over if you actually brought anything to the team.

Were you really all that interesting?

What did you really add to the group?

Did anyone even notice your presence when you were around?

Even if they did, did it make a difference?

You'd overthink your way into a quiet corner wondering why you were the way that you were. No one else could see the way you'd worry yourself into a ball of self-doubt, figuring you were just shy and they didn't want to mistakenly push any boundaries.

Then there was Bucky.

Being around Bucky was different.

Something about him was warm and welcoming. He didn't hesitate to pull you out of your hiding spaces around the compound, making sure you joined for team events and game nights. Any insecurities you had always melted away when you were around him because he made you feel special.

Made you feel wanted.

The night went by with everyone sharing their own conspiracy theories over what they think actually happened at the end of each episode while you stayed tucked by Bucky's side. Neither of you had any plans on calling it an early night, while the rest of the team eventually all went to bed as you switched to a new show.

"I'm going to grab more snacks, want anything sugar plum?" You were about to make your way to the kitchen when Bucky placed his hand on your thigh, making you stay seated.

"I'll get it, tell me what you want Jellybean" He shook his head, grabbing the throw blanket and tossing it over your legs so you'd be comfy for the rest of the night while he went to grab the snacks. You didn't have to actually say anything, Bucky knew exactly what you wanted. He came back with half the kitchen raided on a tray along with a beer, pulling you to his side, letting you snuggle against his chest.

You let out a content sigh, unwrapping a chocolate bar while Bucky snuck a bite, the warmth of his body making it difficult for you to stay awake like you'd planned. You eventually fell asleep, waking up to find yourself tucked comfortably in your bed as the sun poured into your room, your body still wrapped in the throw he had covered you with.

You felt your body warm up at the way he was so gentle with you, having carried you to your room without making you stir the slightest. There wasn't anyone else you'd feel so comfortable around.

He was your safe space.

You found yourself hopping out of bed with more energy than usual, deciding to train in the morning instead of your late night workouts, if you were lucky, maybe you'd run into Bucky after his morning run. You made your way to the kitchen, smiling when you heard his voice, along with Sam's, the both of them bickering over something irrelevant as per usual. The closer you got, the more serious their conversation sounded making you wonder if something had come up with a mission

And then you heard your name.

You stopped half way, staying as still as possible part of you wanting to run back to your room while covering your ears, the other part of you curious to know what they were saying. You wanted to move but your feet were glued to the ground, your heart hammering out of your chest.

"How about y/n?"

"Uh y/n..." You could hear the hesitation in his Bucky's as he contemplated his next words, his tone irritated. "She's whatever. It's not like that"

"Meaning?"

"Uh. I don't know, she sort of follows me around everywhere, there's not a day I don't see her but its not like I ask to see her"

You blinked, your stomach starting to churn. Did you follow him everywhere? You did see him everyday but you didn't realize you were following him.

"I mean she's only that way with you, she's definitely not that comfortable with Steve or me" You could hear Sam trying to reason with Bucky but all he did was scoff, your heart wrenching further.

"Yeah. It's overwhelming"

You wanted to run, wishing you had stayed in bed for an extra 5 minutes, your body now hot, not from how safe he made you feel but from embarrassment. Of course he was overwhelmed with your clinginess, he didn't want to have to deal with a burden like you. He had so much of his own issues to deal with and then there was you.

Guilt started to cloud your mind as you thought about all the times you spent time with Bucky, staying by his side while he reassured you or comforted you. How many of those times were actually annoying for him, how many times did he wish you would suck it up and leave him alone instead.

"She's not really friends with anyone else on the team, I'm not sure why she hangs out with me specifically that much" He sounded even more irritated than before; the rest of the conversation a melted into dull buzz, your heartbeat thudding in your skull.

Your eyes stung, hot tears flooding your lash line at his words. Your bottom lip, trembled despite how hard you were biting down on it; your forced your feet to move, slowly backing away from the kitchen until you were far enough to run to your room. You slammed the door shut, instructing FRIDAY to soundproof the walls and turn away anyone that came by before breaking down into sobs.

All of your insecurities were dialed to 100 along with more being added to the list.

How did you not see how annoying you were being. You felt awful, embarrassed, confused.

Why didn't he say anything?

Of course he wouldn't, he probably felt pity for you. A grown adult woman who struggled to open up and still struggled with her personality. An absolute joke.

You let the day go by, too ashamed to face anyone, let alone Bucky. If he felt irritated, there was no doubt the rest of the team knew exactly how annoying he found you. You couldn't bring yourself to see any of them, deciding to skip both lunch and dinner instead while burying under the covers.

****

Bucky frowned when he didn't see you the whole day, his worries growing more when he didn't see you come by for dinner either.

"Where's y/n?"

"I checked on her during lunch but FRIDAY said she'd requested to be alone" Nat looked at Bucky, confused over how he, of all people, didn't know where you were.

"Aren't you both joined at the hip, how do you not know Barnes" Tony wiggled his eyebrow while Bucky rolled his eyes, too worried about you to retort to Tony's comment.

"I saw her once this morning in the training room but not after that. She seemed fine then" Steve had seen you that morning, happy to see you brighter when he had spoken to you, not missing your shy smile when he'd mentioned Bucky's name. "No one else saw her all day?"

Bucky was immediately out of his seat, making his way over to your room to see you, only to have FRIDAY respond instead.

"Ms. Y/l/n has asked that no one disturb her until further notice"

"For fucks sake" He mumbled, knocking at your door one more time.

"I'm sorry Sergeant Barnes, Ms. y/l/n has asked to be left alone"

Bucky was taken aback when he was tuned away; in the few times you had locked your door from everyone else he'd always been exempt from that list. Why didn't you want to see him either? He reluctantly made his way back, his mind now racing over what could have possibly happened from the night before to now.

****

You had managed to avoid Bucky the next few days, purposefully staying away from the areas you knew he'd be around and staying in your room for most of the day. Whenever he tried to speak to you, you'd find a way to escape the conversation, his words reeling in your mind, reminding you he found you annoying. Overwhelming. Clingy.

You couldn't understand why he was going out of his way to try and talk to you when you were trying so hard to stay away, your heart in pain not being able to spend time with the person you felt the safest with. Your mind made it impossible to get a wink of sleep; you made your way down to the kitchen for a late night snack instead. You grabbed a bowl of popcorn, turning the TV on to your favorite comfort shows needing a temporary distraction.

"Jellybean?"

Bucky made his way through the living room after a late night workout, his heart jumping when his eyes landed on you. He was by your side in an instant, not noticing the way you froze when he sat beside you.

"Hi James"

Bucky blinked, his name sounding foreign on your tongue.

He didn't like it.

Not one bit.

Since when was he James.

"Uh, is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine" You forced a smile, scooting over so you weren't sitting too close to him, your mind racing trying to find a way out of the conversation. Bucky could sense your discomfort but he had no idea why, his heart beating harder against his chest when he noticed your eyes shift, as if you were looking for a way to escape.

"Are-are you sure?"

"Yup!"

"Doll" He noticed the way your eyes continued to flick around the room, refusing to meet his. "Somethings bothering you"

"What makes you say that"

"I-you called me by my name-you never do that"

"What else should I call you" You avoided his gaze, fidgeting with a lose string on a cushion while Bucky felt his stomach drop.

Were you upset with him?

"You always call me sugar plum. Only you do" He shrugged sadly, his bottom lip jutting out into a pout. "You don't call me James"

"Oh" Was all you could muster, feeling your throat close up, hot tears threatening to spill from your lash line. You tried to turn away from him only to have him gently cup your cheek, tilting your chin to face him. His heart broke seeing your glassy eyes while you chewed your lip to keep from crying.

"Please tell me what's wrong, did I do something? Did I say anything?"

"No" You whispered, swallowing thickly, pulling away from him only to have him take your hands in his to keep you from running away.

"C'mon y/n, please?"

"I-I don't mean to follow you around and be so clingy. I'm just trying to give you some space Bucky" You tried to keep your voice steady, hanging your head so he wouldn't see the tears run down your cheeks. Bucky let go of your hands to cup your cheeks again, his thumbs wiping away your tears.

"Jellybean, what are you-

"I heard you talking to Sam" You spat, now annoyed that he was here trying to talk to you when he was the one who felt you followed him around. "I heard you tell him I'm always around you. That you don't even ask to see me but I'm there. I didn't mean to be so overbearing. I felt safe with you so I was closest to you, I didn't realize you felt like I was following you".

"Sweetheart, it's not overwhelming for the reasons you think"

"Then what else could it be Bucky? You could have told me you needed some space, I would've understood. I wouldn't have spend so much time hanging out with you-

"No! I like when you're around me Jellybean" Bucky almost sounded offended you'd suggest such a thing while you shook your head, sniffling.

"You don't have to lie to me-

"Y/n, no. I promise doll, this is just a misunderstanding, that's not that I meant when I was talking to Sam"

"Then what did you mean?" You whispered, confused over what else he could have possibly meant. Bucky felt butterflies in his chest, not fully thinking this through. Should he tell you what the conversation was about? Could it be worse than you thinking he didn't even like you when the truth was the complete opposite?

"I don't want to ruin our friendship if I tell you" Bucky suddenly looked scared, his eyes wide like a lost puppy, vulnerable and afraid. He sucked in a breath before speaking, inching a little closer to you. "Sam was asking about if I'm seeing anyone. He thinks I need to put myself out there"

Oh.

A sudden pang of jealousy hit your chest, the flinch in your face not missed by Bucky.

"He was suggesting..." He bit his lip, chewing it nervously before continuing. "He asked if there was anything between us. He thought maybe you liked me because we're always together" Bucky continued to look at you like a kicked puppy, his own emotions now all over the place. "I didn't think you did. At least not in that way but he kept saying there was something between us"

"It didn't sound like you liked me very much" You shrugged while Bucky frantically shook his head, mentally scolding himself. "I thought you found me too clingy"

"Never. You're never too clingy. M'so so sorry doll, I didn't mean for it to come out that way, you're the only person who I can spend the whole day with, I'm not comfortable around others like I am with you. I love when you come around looking for me. I guess a part of me was upset because Sam wasn't the first to ask me why we weren't together and ask if we were more than friends. I didn't think you'd like me and it's overwhelming for me because I feel so much and...well"

"and?" Bucky blushed, struggling to get the next words out while you anxiously waited for him to continue.

"and I really like you" He whispered, squeezing your hand in his while you shifted closer, letting him pull you onto his lap. His arms circled around your waist, holding you close to him both your hearts racing, his nose bumping against yours.

"You like me?" You felt your cheeks heat up when he nodded, his blue eyes shyly peeking up at you through his lashes.

"I like you jellybean. A lot"

"Even more than m&m's?" You felt him hug you together, your lips brushing against his.

"More than m&m's" He closed the gap between you both, pressing his lips to yours, kissing you sweetly as you gently carded your fingers through his hair. He kissed you until you both needed air, a dopey smile on his face while you snuggled into his chest.

"Does that mean I'm your sugar plum again?" He whispered hopefully making you giggle, kissing him deeply again.

"Always, my sugar plum"

"My jellybean"

****

"Fucking finally" Tony mumbled, his hair ruffled, stifling a yawn as he walked through the living room, grinning at you and Bucky sleeping on the couch.

"I told him" Steve rolled his eyes, snapping a picture of you both cuddled on the couch while Sam snorted, nodding in approval. "Took them long enough"

Tags: @glxwingrxse @hungryyeyess @sebsgirl71479 @beabutterfly987 @teambarnes72 @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan @buggy14 @whimsyplaty92 @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec @pono-pura-vida @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog @happyt0exist @emmabarnes @bethyruth @matchat3a @cjand10 @getwellsoontana @cherryschaos @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @ashenc-blog @buckybarnessimpp @potatothots @goldylions @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog @kingfleury @peaches1958 @spiderman-stilinski @peaceinourtime82 @gublur @wintersmelodie @geeky-politics-46 @lolawassad @almosttoopizza @a-poor-gryffindork @alternativeprincess @buckycallsmeaslut @kamaria-sweet-writes @charmedbysarge @xnorthstar3x @kryoee7 @alina02 @gh0stgurl @polishprincess999 @jessybarnes @alltheficsiwant @chemtrails-club @eralen @perdidosbucky-yyo @clqrosmgc

[comicaurora]

What are your thoughts on guardians vol.3? (If you have watched it) I went into it, expecting it went to the garbage like the rest of the mcu, but I was pleasantly surprised by its creativity, trope subversion, and how it wrapped up the previously unresolved arks of its characters.

That's what I've heard!

The thing is, Guardians 3 could be the most transcendent work of cinema ever made, and I'd probably still feel little to no motivation to watch it at this point. It's not Guardians's fault - it's just suffering from the same problem that superhero comics have been struggling with for decades: no matter how good an individual arc or run is, absolutely nothing good lasts or matters in the long term, and the stories are shaped in such a way that "the long term" is the only thing anyone gets to build towards.

Whenever I complain about the MCU I get a handful of people loudly complaining about my complaining, with the general thesis that if I don't like it I shouldn't watch it or talk about it - if I'm not having fun, just stop engaging with it. And the thing is, I have. I am intellectually interested in why this massive franchise is fumbling the bag so hard, which is why I still check in on it sometimes, but I've long since stopped turning to the MCU for uncritical entertainment. And even the good movies or shows with a lot of interesting ideas - good character arcs, fun concepts, interesting planting for future payoff - don't draw me in anymore, because they're hooked into a massive moneymaking machine that will scrap and squander anything if they think it'll make them more in the quarter. It doesn't matter how good the writing is, because the writers are not allowed to tell a complete, finished story, and they have no control over what happens to their characters outside of their own script.

Captain America's arc was set up from literally minute one to answer one burning question at the core of his character: does a world without a war still need Captain America? After that incredibly basic tee-up at the end of First Avenger, half a dozen movies failed to come up with a reason to say "yes," and now Steve is retired for good after getting fumbled through four different storylines that couldn't even pretend that they needed him (the unused Chekhov's Phone from the end of Civil War still haunts me). The foundational arc of his entire character never happened because nobody bothered to keep track of it past a single movie.

Taika did something interesting with Thor in Ragnarok - take away Mjolnir, force him to recognize what it means to be the god of thunder, give him a very Odin-y missing eye - and the very next movie undid all of it. Just kidding, never mind, here's an eye and a new weapon and also his old weapon again, and in one more movie we're even gonna give him his hair back, probably as an apology for all the completely unironic fatphobia we're gonna slather him in for two and a half hours. I'm not even surprised Love And Thunder was such an overblown mess that barely took itself seriously - why would Taika bother trying to give Thor another arc when the powers that be will just roll it back in six months anyway?

I hear Rocket Raccoon has a fantastic arc in this movie. That's great, and demonstrates that he's being written by a writer that deeply cares about him. But he's part of the MCU, and the MCU doesn't let anything end, so if current patterns hold, Rocket is going to continue to serve as quippy plushie-bait for the next dozen movies and none of that depth is going to come through in the long term. Hell, since they're making Kang noises for the Next Big Threat and Kang's entire gimmick is rewriting timelines, literally none of this is guaranteed to matter. By next year, it might not have even happened anymore.

The MCU has successfully shaped itself into a paradigm where the bright spots of good writing are overridden and lost as soon as the writers room turns over, and that makes it really hard for me to muster up the enthusiasm to watch even a really good movie that's locked into the exact same grist mill as everything else. I'm glad people liked it, I hope it gets to stay good this time - I just have no desire to watch it.

[piratefishmama]

Winged Eddie has me DYING I tell you, DYING. Like, it's so so so good.

In a sort of analysis way (which I understand was probably not how you wrote it but yk death of the author and all that) the wings are a GREAT metaphor for visible queerness and disability. Just scrumptious. I am eating this concept.

But also just like on a pure enjoyment level - THIS IS SO GOOD. IM SCREAMING. Steve finding out that petting the wings is a thing for Eddie - and then having like a 3 pronged conflict because he did that, but he wasn't trying to arouse Eddie, just take care of him, and now Eddie has run away ashamed and embarrassed and Steve needs him to know that he is so so so into him but also he needs him to know that he could tell Steve to stop and that he doesn't have to be ashamed or embarrassed

Just absolutely screaming I tell you. I'm eating this whole thing. Scrumdiddlyumptious

Ehe u caught me a lil bit, I was kind of aiming for it being an "othering" sort of thing with how it's not UNCOMMON, that there's way more of them in big cities and such but they're rarer in small towns in the middle of nowhere, like queerness and disabilities in general.

Steve has always been a caretaker type too, he mothers his friends, he big brothers the kids, he's a babysitter, a caregiver, he CARES, it's his love language to provide care for someone, and what better way can he care for someone than to groom their wings for them, something they're clearly struggling to keep ontop of themselves. Eddie may seem like he's doing it on purpose but Steve's caught him struggling to itch a spot multiple times and he's SEEN him stress out over pin feathers still stuck in keratin sheaths when he thinks no-one is looking.

And Steve knows he can do that. He can help with that, an when Eddie LETS him he doesn't think anything of it because why would he? He's just helping out, he's absolutely positive that it means way more to him than it does to Eddie, but he's very wrong abt that.

Eddie is so sure Steve will be weirded out by him enjoying it like that. And Steve is so sure that he's done something wrong, and Eddie is VERY good at running and hiding, despite the wings he's pretty good at disappearing, so it's basically up to the party to figure out what the hell happened cause they're not talking and lemme tell u.

Dustin is sufficiently mortified to learn that if they were BIRDS, Steve would have been basically one step away from mounting his DM lmao. just whining cause "Steeeeeeevvee it's a boyfriend/girlfriend thing, Steve!!"

Now the question Steve is pondering is why Eddie allowed it to happen if it was a boyfriend girlfriend thing. Many thoughts. Many, many thoughts!!

[wpmz]

a lil concept/design sheet of the gangs' costumes for my deltarune halloween comic! :]

multiple paragraphs of yapping about it under the cut bc i actually put way too much thought into who got which costume lol

i kept a few things in mind while trying to decide each character's costume, the biggest of which were probably A) it should still look good when combined with their dark world outfit B) i wanted them all to be classic halloween monsters (so no other characters like mario or minecraft steve or w/e) C) none of them could dress as a monster who is another major character in ut/dr just cuz i thought it'd be a little weird lol (so no skeletons or ghosts for example) and D) i tried to keep in mind each character's family life/accessibility to a costume in the first place (so kris + noelle have the more elaborate costumes vs berdly and susie having theirs be more low effort/over their normal clothes)

originally i had sketched susie as a zombie/frankenstein sorta creature, but then i remembered susie calling kris the 'school zombie' (plus kris's general zombie-like neutrality) so i ofc switched that over to kris. had the idea that the dark world would make their halloween costumes more 'real' so thats why their brain is out in that one lol

didn't have too many other ideas for susie, as a lot of the ones i was having broke some of the rules i listed above. at first i was thinking maybe werewolf but i felt that the ears/tail might lean a little too cutesy for her, and then i was thinking maybe like godzilla-esque but didn't know how to do that when susie is already vaguley godzilla-esque by herself. i also wanted to keep her costume looking more low-effort due to her parents (if they even exist) probably not caring enough to get a nice costume. which is how we ended up at toilet paper mummy susie

noelle is a witch because i thought it'd be cute + i wanted her to be matching with catti (who i think would also obviously be a witch for halloween). her costume is the most elaborate (complete with matching candy pail), both because i think she'd like dressing up for halloween and well. the mayor's daughter certainly has appearances to keep up doesnt she? (also quite proud of her little shawl changing to look sort of like angel wings in the dark world :] )

berdly i also struggled with. my first impulse was to make him some kinda video game character, but like i said i kind of wanted them all to be more classic halloween monsters, plus i didn't really think any of those ideas would mesh well with his dark world outfit. ended up going with vampire bc i feel like its one of the more nerd-coded halloween monsters out there. i liked drawing his little fake fangs it makes him look silly

[captaintoomanybattles]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love ❤

(Not sure which blog would be best to send it)

Thank you so much for the ask! This is the blog I normally post fic on, so this is perfect.

Five favorite fics I've written:

Not a Perfect Soldier: This was the first long fic I finished, and I'm still really proud of it. Steve in canon has a lot of agency (even if I think SHIELD definitely tries to manipulate him), so I was fascinated with the idea of what would change if he started out in captivity.

In a world where HYDRA was wiped out in the '40s, Steve is found by the Army rather than SHIELD. General Thaddeus Ross wants a perfectly obedient super-soldier at his command, and to that end, he sets out to break Steve to his will. As Steve struggles to come to terms with all he has lost, his life in captivity is only made bearable by the presence of another prisoner-- another super-soldier known only as "Soldat". Then the Avengers strike a deal with Ross to "borrow" him for missions, and Steve is faced with a team who dislikes him, an organization he doesn't trust, and the question of what he's willing to do to escape Ross's clutches.

The Kind You Save: I love exploring the idea of what Steve would be like as the Winter Soldier, and what the Winter Soldiers would be like if there were two of them. I also love Sam Wilson, and it was really fun to write the relationship between the three of them!

When HYDRA sends the Winter Soldiers to assassinate the new Captain America, they expect the mission to be an easy one. After all, they're super-soldiers-- how hard can it be to kill one unenhanced human? As more and more of their attempts prove unsuccessful, however, the Soldiers' respect for Wilson grows, as does their suspicion that HYDRA's motives are not what they seem. If Sam Wilson is a good man, what does that make them…?

Six Blade Knife: Another fic with Steve and Bucky as Winter Soldiers. This is basically exploring how the Soldiers, conditioned to expect the worst possible treatment, would react to a kinder captivity with the Avengers. I started a WIP with this premise a long time ago but didn't really know where to go with it; I ended up sharing it with ZepysGirl, who helped me figure out an actual plot!

During a raid on an AIM base, the Avengers find a pair of cryotubes in a basement laboratory. When they release the men inside, they find that they are none other than the Winter Soldiers, the assassins so mysterious that most people in the Intelligence community consider them little more than a ghost story. However, as they learn more about the Soldiers, Sam and Natasha begin to suspect that the Soldiers may not have been operating under their own free will. Soldat and Kapitan wake from cryo to new handlers unlike anyone they've encountered before. Captain Wilson and Agent Romanoff seem to have no interest in hurting them, wiping their memories, or sending them on missions. As the Soldiers adapt to this kinder status quo, they must decide how far they are willing to go to protect their new handlers from their old ones.

Brave Soldier Boy (Comes Marching Home): This was a response to a bingo prompt featuring Winifred Barnes. Canon doesn't give us much information about Bucky and Steve's relationships with their families, so I really enjoyed exploring Winifred's point of view!

Ten years after losing her son in the war, Winnifred Barnes receives an unexpected visitor. The Winter Soldier needs her help with an important mission.

I Just Want You to Know Who I Am: This was based on a prompt from BulkyPhrase. It was really interesting to explore what might have happened differently if the serum made Steve look like Red Skull. How would that affect other people's treatment of Steve, and how would it affect Steve's conception of himself?

By the time Steve Rogers was selected for Project Rebirth, Erskine thought he had eliminated the side effect that turned Johann Schmidt into Red Skull. He was wrong. This story explores the question: What would change if the serum caused Steve to look like Red Skull?

[afewproblems]

WIP Wednesday

I'm actually posting on WIP Wednesday, the stars have finally aligned in my favour!

Thank you to @outpastthebrakers for your tag today and @steves-strapcollection for your multiple tags before - its finally lined up today!!

Here is Part Two of my follow up to this Post (Steddie Breakup) hopefully with a Steddie makeup/fix-it future!

(Also! Important to note, season four - specifically the stuff with Vecna- Never happened in this AU)

***

Two Years later - 1987, Chicago, IL

Steve picks up another box from the back of the beemer. This one has, 'Steve's Obnoxious Hair Care,' neatly printed on the side in bold black sharpie --Steve snorts at the sight and vows to never let Robin help him pack ever again. 

He walks up the three flights and through the propped open front door to the two bedroom apartment.

It's small, just barely enough for two people, but in downtown Chicago, it's a steal at the price. 

And it's theirs. 

"Hey Birdie," Steve calls out from the kitchen, he sets the box down on the counter, turning his head to the left slightly to listen for her shuffling. The dull ringing in his right ear makes it more difficult, present ever since he left his parents house for good.

It had gotten even worse since their Russian encounter, but if he's weighing the pros and the cons of that night, he's glad he got Robin out of the deal.

Steve steps into the living room just off the kitchen, "Robin?"

Bright sunlight streams through the curtainless windows bathing Robin in a warm yellow glow. 

She stands in the center, facing Steve, with a pensive expression, her eyes scanning the space around her. 

"Hush Dingus," she mutters, holding up her pointer finger to her lips, "I'm visualizing". 

"Ah, of course," he concedes with a fond smile as Robin walks towards him slowly counting her steps. She lines her feet up as she moves, touching the toe of her right foot to the heel of her left. She wobbles slightly as she makes it to where Steve is standing, he reaches out to steady her with a laugh.

"I told you the living room was more than ten feet!"

"Robin, do you think that a 'foot' is literally your foot?" 

Robin sucks her teeth and rolls her eyes, before plucking the measuring tape from where it was clipped to her back pocket, "you have no concept of joy, you refuse to let me live".

"Yeah, yeah, so hard done by," he snorts as she sticks her tongue out at him and leans down to pick up one of the empty boxes.

She sighs and looks around the space again with a contented expression before looking at Steve, "well, Dingus, I think we did good".

Steve nods and tries to smile back but the expression doesn't quite meet his eyes, Robin tilts her head, turning the box over in her hands at the corners.

"What's wrong?" She says softly, anxiously, her blue eyes dart over his face, "is it a migraine? Do you need your meds?"

Steve shakes his head, wincing before he can stop himself, he knows Robin's brain would come up with the worst case scenario first. And, to be fair to her, she had seen the worst case scenarios and after effects of the Russian interrogation, she'd held his hand after spilling his guts from the nausea and halos in his vision, she'd insisted he buy blackout blinds for his room because, 'you never know when you'll need them Dingus, you won't always get one of these at night'.

Steve shakes his head, "no, it's not a migraine, relax Robs," he huffs as she levels him with a disbelieving stare.

"I just," Steve chews his lip for a moment as he drops his gaze to the floor. Robin steps closer, tilting her head to the side as he struggles to find the words.

"I love that you came with me, that we get to be here, but," Steve sighs and runs a hand through his hair. It's longer than it had been two years ago, the gold and copper from his time in the warm summer sun slowly fading back to brown.

"Eddie always talked about leaving Hawkins someday, and I always thought it would be with me".

"This was our plan," he says softly, lifting his eyes to meet Robin's own, her brows pinched in a small frown.

"And I managed to screw that up like everything else," he trails off softly.

***

"I just don't understand why you have to go to this thing, you aren't even interested in his stupid job?" Eddie growls as he tosses the pencil up at his bedroom ceiling, it stays for just a moment before falling back into his waiting hands. Pock marks litter the tile from previous throws and Steve is sure Wayne's told him to knock it off more times than he can count.

"It's complicated," Steve says lowly, he pictures his dad's thunderous face, the same square jaw and straight nose that Steve has, they could be identical but for their ages and the cold grey eyes his father has. 

Steve took after his mother in that area, inheriting her large hazel eyes and long lashes. 

"No it's not," Eddie says stubbornly, he throws the pencil with more force this time and it hangs in the ceiling between them, "you could tell him to stuff his job up his ass".

"Eddie--"

"No, no, you know we had a show tonight, and you're choosing to go to your dad's fundraiser instead?"  

Steve sighs and bites the inside of his cheek, tamping down the urge to argue with his boyfriend.

But, they've never really had this talk before, Steve's never told anyone about his father and his homelife. 

Right now he wishes he had.

"It's not like I have much of a choice," he huffs as Eddie rolls his eyes and scoffs, "and not all of us have someone like Wayne to encourage us to do whatever we want".

"That's such bullshit and you know it," Eddie hisses ignoring the slight flinch from Steve, "you always do this". 

What?

"You never want to come to our shows, you never want to sit in on Hellfire--"

"That's not true," Steve growls, crossing his arms over his stomach, he hunches in on himself slightly but Eddie shakes his head.

"Yes it is! When was the last time you came to a show?"

Steve wracks his brain, trying to remember the name of the bar they had played at, it wasn’t the Hideaway, it had been a bit of a drive to get there. It was a dive bar that had sounded like it was straight out of Robin Hood, The Red Lion?

"See!" Eddie takes his silence as victory and throws his hands up in the air, "what did I tell you?"

"Jesus, it was a bar show just like all of them Eddie, it's not like you guys were playing on MTV or something," Steve snaps, the last threads of his patience wearing thinner and thinner. 

"Oh fuck off, MTV is part of the problem, do you not listen when I talk?"

"I always listen to you!" Steve cries out, his voice climbs in volume and his hands shake as adrenaline spikes, "sometimes you just talk and talk and talk and you say nothing important but I always listen to you!"

"Woooow, fuck you," Eddie scoffs as he turns on his heel and opens his bedroom door, Steve follows him, fuming but wary.

"Since everything I say is bullshit, apparently, and you don't want to come to our shows or spend time with me then maybe you should just go!"

Steve halts in his tracks.

Eddie stands by the open front door to the trailer, his cheeks are red and his mouth is a flat line carved in the middle of his face.

Steve feels his heart rate tick up as he stands there frozen.

They've had disagreements before, small petty arguments but this feels big. Much bigger than any fight they've ever had. 

"Eddie-"

"Nope, unless you tell me you're coming tonight, we're done".

Oh.

And just like that, it hurts just as much as when Nancy had told him she didn't love him the previous year. It's too much, he needs to leave.

"Yeah, you know what Eddie, I don't need this," Steve says so softly that Eddie leans forward to hear before reeling back as though struck, "I don't," he shakes his head and walks past Eddle towards the open door. 

Eddie's hands twitch as though he wants to reach out to Steve, to pull him back into the trailer, but they remain at his sides.

"You're right," Eddie yells after him as Steve walks down the gravel drive to his car, "you don't need us, we don't need you, go crawling back to daddy just like always".

Steve stops walking and looks back at Eddie. The metal-head's wide brown eyes are shiny with angry tears. 

Steve feels his own angry tears pooling along his lash line.

He gets in the car and drives away, ignoring the tightness in his chest as he heads home.

***

"Okay, first of all," Robin says sharply as she drops the box at their feet and pokes him in the chest with a rigid pointer finger, "you're damn right you're happy I came with you, I am a catch!" 

Steve rolls his eyes as Robin clears her throat imperiously until he raises his hands in surrender.

"Second, he found out about your dads shit, saw you beaten to hell and back, and didn't even want to have a conversation? Fuck that noise".

"Birdy, you weren't there, and you don't even know Eddie--"

"I know you though," she continues, staring him down, "and I know if the roles were reversed, you would have at least heard him out".

Steve holds back a wince, attempting to keep his expression as neutral as possible. He knows she isn’t right, he knows he made a mistake that night walking away, they should have talked, they should have had it out. 

Steve should have told Eddie the truth. 

Then again, Eddie dropped him like it was nothing so maybe he was better off in the long run.

Strangely enough this thought doesn’t make him feel better.

"Robin," Steve sighs wearily, crossing to the wall of the living room before leaning his back against it to slide down to the floor. 

"Tell me I'm wrong," she says softly, walking towards his spot on the floor, she settles beside him and nudges his shoulder with her own.

"Tell me I'm wrong and I'll drop it," she says again, firmly this time.

Steve breathes out a sigh and brings his knees to his chest, looking towards the window. 

The view isn't much, just the street and other buildings, but the Chicago skyline seems to stretch for miles ahead of them.

"You’re not wrong," he says eventually, ignoring the crow of triumph Robin makes, "but you're not right either".

She scoffs and leans her head against his shoulder, the soft waves of her hair tickle the skin on his bare arm but the weight and warmth of her is comforting.

"Besides, it was years ago," Steve mutters, "I'm sure he's forgotten all about me by now".

tagging: @strangersteddierthings @flowercrowngods @steddierthings @steddie-there @henderdads and anyone else that would like to participate! (Please tag me with your wonderful creations! Also I apologize if you've already been tagged - feel free to ignore this!)

[teddywesworl]

list of questions incoming but I couldn’t pick just one!

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

🍅 ⇢ give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

both my bio parents were professional violinists and i have perfect pitch. it's not super well practiced rn but i can get it back pretty quick

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

the whole intelligence types thing is pseudoscience irl but i think it IS a good tool to understand fictional characters, especially in the context of a fandom that has kind of a weird uncomfy relationship with its concept of steddie as smart or not smart. anyway steve is spatial/kinesthetic/interpersonal and eddie is musical/linguistic

is that a headcanon? ummm i think appalachian munsons is god's own truth

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

answered here!

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

also answered here!

🍅 ⇢ give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing

pretentious, gets up its own ass frequently. overall voice struggles to stick to character without getting too lofty. i don't give myself too much shit about it though bc im tryna write a high fantasy novel at the same time

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

answered here!

[steddieficrec]

what are your top 10 favorite Steddie fics?!?!?

Oof. You have the hard questions.

(pleased to be) on the line with you by Kedreeva

(1/1 I 3,820 I Explicit)

Eddie pulls the phone away from his ear and looks at it as if it can tell him what the fuck is going on right now, why Steve Harrington is at the mechanic shop, sweet talking him like a stranger at 8:03 on a Friday morning.

----

Or, the one where Eddie dials a wrong number and accidentally discovers Steve works as a phone sex operator.

don't do drunk (what you wouldn’t do sober) by starsdontsleep

(1/1 I 4,070 I Teen)

Getting drunk alone with Steve has always been a bit of a risk for Eddie. He sits closer, looks longer and flirts harder. He also makes a stupid mistake and wakes up in the morning to the harsh reality of what his drunken self had suggested to Steve.

Rebuild by rainbow_nerds

(1/1 I 7,864 I Explicit)

In 1976, when Steve Harrington was ten years old, he was cast as the lead character in Ruins of Relfonth. The film went on to become a classic of the intersection of sci-fi and fantasy genres, and Steve hated just about every second of it.

At twenty three, with no clue what he wanted from life, he decided to give acting one last shot – on a music video for a band he'd never even listened to.

get up and shake the glitter off your clothes by judasofsuburbia

(1/1 I 11,021 I Explicit)

He looks positively debauched in the mirror. There is glitter smeared all over his face. Hair standing at all angles and hickies littering his neck and chest. His hands instantly go to them, pressing into them to make sure he’s not making them up when he notices a ring on his left finger.

Eddie’s mood ring.

No fucking way.

or: the spicy six go to vegas. steve and eddie get married but they don't remember a thing. steve's convinced himself that eddie's feelings were all a drunken mistake. but were they?

the most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway is that it’s you by greatunironic

(5/5 I 34,987 I Explicit)

Sixteen years after the world didn't end for the last time, Max Mayfield showed up on Steve’s doorstep and said, “You gonna walk me down the aisle in May or what?” Or, it’s 2002 and Steve Harrington attends a wedding, a funeral, and a birth.

Are You Flagging? by soidade

(17/17 I 40,991 I Explicit)

“Look, I’m just asking, okay? Not– I don't mean anything by it. But, uh.” His eyes darted back and forth, then he leaned in close to Steve. Steve had gotten used to that, kind of. The guy had no concept of personal space. “Are you flagging?” Eddie finally finished.

Steve shook his head slowly, eyes narrowed. He had no idea what that meant. He had no answer. “What?”

Eddie leaned away from Steve, facing forward again and nodding. “Okay, got it. That answers my question. Carry on.”

-------------------------------------------------

A (mostly) innocent question leads Steve Harrington on a journey of self-discovery, friendship, sex, and romance.

Not So Bad by outofmygourd

(9/9 I 43,409 I Mature)

Vecna is dead. It's the summer after the party's freshman year. Steve Harrington spends it in the Family Video Store, and Eddie Munson is spending post-graduate life bothering him. And maybe Steve isn't as bothered as he used to be.

sub-culture by palmviolet

(13/13 I 60,702 I Teen)

“Is he whining about Eddie being mean to him again?” Robin is leaning in the doorway, eating a leftover slice that’s probably cold by now. “You talk about him more than you talk about girls, Steve, it’s getting concerning. Anyone would think you had a crush.”

or, steve is pretty convinced eddie now hates him. turns out eddie has the opposite problem.

flight risk by Ayes, itskleo

(16/16 I 81,326 I Explicit)

Eddie Munson is famous for giving his bodyguards the slip. Enter Steve Harrington. Has this bratty rock star finally met a babysitter that can keep up with him?

Suspended Bridges by foresthearts

(35/35 I 243,515 I Mature)

“Steve really needed to get his stupid thing he had with Munson under control. He struggled to find a word for it. It was like an anti-crush or something. The same awareness and panic that a crush brought, but not because he had feelings for the guy. Because of the opposite. Because any time he saw Munson, his heart kicked up in fear, his breathing got shallow, his whole body started to warm. Munson made him want to turn heel and run.”

In which Steve has the opposite of the suspended bridge effect.

(Featuring omega!Steve pretending to be an alpha and alpha!Eddie silently losing his mind.)

[florallylly]

Loved your Steve child model au, esp because it focuses on Steve making his looks part of his personality. I wish the show would go into Steve's injuries more. We know he likes the way he looks and is a bit vain about it. If they never bring up the demobat scars again, what was the point? Because realistically he would struggle with it. Even prior to that his face should be littered with scars, his nose should look a bit wonky. I would love to see him coming to terms with his new look and how he will act because of it. Like you said I feel like Steve thinks beauty is all he has, he doesn't think he's smart enough, all his has is his looks and charms but if that gets taken away who really is he? I know the show won't ever acknowledge Steve's trauma, we would be lucky if the neck scar is visible in s5 but man. Sorry for this rant here

THANK YOU SO MUCH. i have literally been ruminating about this concept for ages, mentally begging someone to catch my brainwaves and write it. but unforch... it hasn't worked. had to get my little brain worm out in the form of word vomit, BUT I AM SO GLAD YOU GET THE VISION.

like he's constantly looking at the mirror pre-stranger things to make sure he's always looking perfect but after billy and starcourt, he can't help but look at the imperfections on his face. i don't think he's stop using mirror TOTALLY but i feel like at a certain point, he'd consider his BODY his appeal.

i think that him striking out in scoops would just validate his feelings about his looks, and make him feel even more like a Loser because could he even trust his fallback anymore? and just the crushing low self esteem because he thinks that all he has is being pretty, and when he loses that, then what is he?

and my theory is that when he does modeling on the side after his parents cut him off, photographers also point out his flaws and some of them end up trying to cover up his scars with make up or take focus away from his face. but he continues on because he Needs the Money. and at least he still has something attractive about him.

WHICH leading to family video, i think that steve would try to change his mannerisms to purposely bring attention to his figure and emphasize what he considers his best asset. only for his thoughts to be validated because he starts getting dates again.

in my heart, i imagine that during this time, he is connected with a photographer who is looking for a model for their art exhibition. and gushing over steve's "unique" look and his "bravery" for continuing to be a model. steve feeling super uncomfortable bc he's so used to trying to bring attention away from his face.

and maybe that photographer focuses on his scars, inspired to tell a story of sorts through their photos. and steve's eye twitching because he feels like a specimen under a microscope, and the focus on his "imperfections" just causes him to spiral a little bit rather than builds his confidence.

and the demobats just take away the last thing he's been able to hold onto. they take away the last thing that could possibly give him value.

and YEAH the show so rarely shows the consequences of trauma, especially when it comes to steve. and it's such a shame that the scars seem to disappear at the start of every season. if season 5 shows steve with ANY scars, i would be immensely surprised (though i think i might not watch season 5...)

ALSO sudden thought: steve harrington's brain trauma leading to migraines, and the bright lights during shoots trigger them. but he's so determined to see this through and prove his worth that he soldiers through. he's popping as much tylenol he can, but he's cold sweating bc the pounding in his head is so intense. and every time he leaves a shoot, he's out of commission for at least a day afterwards.

and i respond to ur rant with a rant <3 BUT YEAH thank you for getting the vision...

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Wings of the Master"

Hera focus this time 'round, let's go flying.

Technically not a Friendship Fetch Quest episode, at least in terms of allies specifically for the Ghost crew. We DO gain an ally, but he and his creation are really more useful to the wider Rebellion at large. That is also a major recurring theme of the show: Building up the Rebellion piece by piece, ship by ship, cell by cell, person by person.

Not entirely sure why Kallus is heading up an Imperial blockade, that doesn't usually seem his area of expertise.

I think we're supposed to understand that Empire learned about them trying to smuggle aid to Ibaar and enacted the blockade to capture/destroy them but... honestly they just seem really really petty about preventing this one planet in particular from getting food.

It's always weird when one of the background bit roles is clearly just Steve Blum or Freddie Prince Jr.

Hera taking control and barking orders at everyone one by one, a nice hint foreshadowing that she's our focal character for today.

Sad Hera makes the heart hurteth. :(

Oooh, really liking this 360 dolly shot around the briefing holodisplay and the way the harp notes almost seem like they're in time with Rex's steps.

Kanan volunteers Hera for the mission to retrieve the B-wing and booooooooy the bad takes I had to see about that. Fandom could not give the boys a break, always took some of the most reaching uncharitable interpretations of everything they did.

(Fortunately most of them went away after the Season Two finale, with occasional hiccups.)

All I'm gonna say is that it was clear from the action prologue and basically the entirety of how Hera'd been acting that she was tunnel visioning and needed to be broken out of that single-goal mindset, or at least redirected to go after the solution that would actively help.

I do wonder if the reason Hera was so unusually determined to blunt force her way past the blockade had anything to do with her Clone Wars experiences. Ryloth was blockaded and starved out as well.

You know, after the crap he dealt with last episode it's really kind of nice to see Ezra feeling and acting lighter, he seems much less stressed.

Also this whole exchange is hilarious. Love Ezra banging on Chopper's dome and then pretending he didn't do it.

A new cue starts up here, a bit akin to the "Victory" leitmotif, sounds like snare drums handling the beat there maybe. Makes it sound a bit more exotic.

This whole sequence has some great camerawork and blocking. Really makes you feel the speed and wind and hard turns.

I appreciate that they could have played Zeb's weight tilting the ship dangerously off the edge for laughs but didn't, they stayed very serious throughout.

Quarrie is obviously named after Ralph McQuarrie, one of the big concept artists for the Original Trilogy. A nice little homage.

There's this really pretty quality to how Quarrie's irises are painted. Rebels' eye models are always so detailed and vibrant and look like a lot of hard work to make so consistently lovely, I totally get why the animators sometimes went out of their way to avoid doing them lol.

I'm frankly still a little confused by Quarrie's initial refusal to let them take the B-wing. I guess he was doing a Secret Test Of Character and once he heard why Hera was motivated to fly he decided she was up to snuff?

The set design for Quarrie's shipyard is nice though.

A little bit of Hera backstory! Honestly, I never thought Hera as a character needed much explanation; What we get about her motivation and past in this episode is pretty much all we need. (We get more obviously when we meet her dad but that's kind of a bonus.) Hera is straightforward (passionate about flying, channeled her skills and passion into the Rebellion) and her character arc is nearly already complete by the time we meet her, only missing that reconciliation with her father.

She doesn't have as many character struggles but then she doesn't exactly need them. She knows who she is, what she wants, what motivates her, and there's something to be said for that kind of self-assuredness.

The show would shake up her foundations later, as things got more serious but for now this was just enough character exploration to satisfy.

Anyway, Hera's speech is what Quarrie was waiting for, apparently, and he lets her test fly the B-wing.

This beautiful sweeping cue I think might be Hera's theme. It first turns up in this episode and has played periodically throughout.

I know a lot of fans have praised this flying sequence so let me just add to the chorus, it's really good. You get a solid sense of the speed and maneuverability of the B-wing.

Lol Sabine and Quarrie spatting over who's going to modify and refine the B-Wing.

The Phantom gets a mid-season upgrade, now capable of hyperspace travel on its own, independent of the Ghost, a feature which gets puts to a LOT of use the rest of the season as Kanan and Ezra split off from the rest more and more.

Running a blockade stationed on one side of a planet might seem weird when there's a whole back half of the planet that's not blocked off but remember, hyperspace lanes are a thing, it takes more work and effort to chart new paths through hyperspace than it does to just use the existing lane, which will only let you out at a certain spot. All the Empire has to do is sit in front of that spot to prevent you from maneuvering around and outflanking them.

The new Rebel Alliance cue that we heard in the first season finale makes an appearance to herald Hera's arrival.

"Oh shit that's my wife, lol y'all screwed now."

And the B-wing takes out a huge chunk of one of the Imperial cruisers. This is why developing the TIE Defenders became so important, never underestimate the importance of fighter superiority.

The success of the mission prompts Sato to promote Hera officially to Phoenix Leader and everyone looks so proud of her. As they should lol.

This is one of my husband's favorite episodes. If we're consuming Rebels like comfort food it's one of the ones he tends to pick. The man likes starfighters and the B-wing is his favorite, what can I say?

It's not a very complicated episode but it's beautiful and leaves me feeling light and happy.

Sabine's turn for basic backstory and minor character development is next and... well I'll just comment about it when I get there.

[madilovrs]

She

Nancy Wheeler x fem!Reader

summary: you want nancy but you don’t know if nancy would want you

inspired by She by dodie

800 words

warnings: angst

tumblr stop screwing up my spacing challenge

You were smart and in all of the hardest classes at Hawkins High School. The only class you struggled with in your junior year was physics. Your struggle confused everyone who knew you because you had always been a science and math person. You had always thrived with the logic of science and math and the way there was always a right or wrong answer. It wasn't the concept of physics or the contents of the class that caused the worst grade of your junior year. It was the people in it.

Actually, one person in it.

At the beginning of the year, you had all gotten the opportunity to choose the person you wanted to share a two-person desk with.

"The seating chart would not be changed all year. No exceptions," Ms. Davis had droned. So you were adamant to pick someone god. On the first day of class, you discovered that you had physics with Nancy Wheeler. The two of you had known each other your whole life but were never close. Nancy was kind and you'd always admired her beauty and generosity. In recent years, she had also grown into a bit of a badass, not to mention she was extremely intelligent.

These were just some of the reasons you had asked her to sit together. However, she hadn't just helped you with physics. You and Nancy had become best friends. You two had sleepovers almost every week and you two knew everything about each other, you knew how she smelled and her favorite chapstick flavor. However, your feelings for her were different than hers for you. She had an effect on you that you had never had with a girl before.

You knew her feelings weren't reciprocated. The majority of the conversations the two of you had at sleepovers were about her boyfriend, Jonathon. You knew you would be better for Nancy though. It's not that Jonathon was a bad boyfriend by any means, but you were a better match, you could provide Nancy with everything she had ever wanted. But you knew that you couldn't think like that. You weren't allowed to like her.

Nancy Wheeler was a girl who liked boys.

----------

"Y/N, you gotta stop looking at her like that," Robin whispered while luffing your arm, noting your wistful gaze toward Nancy and Jonathon browsing Family Video's selection. You and Robin had been friends for a while, both being considered Hawkins High outcasts. The two of you worked together alongside Steve Harrington at Scoops Ahoy earlier in the summer, but due to the incidents at Starcourt, you were forced to relocate. The three of you, with a newfound bond, applied together at Family Video. 

At the time, it seemed like a good idea. Before you realized Jonathon's affinity for movies he dragged Nancy into.

"I know..." you said slowly, looking away. You are not allowed to look at her like that. That was a job for boyfriends.

"I mean you never know, Y/N/N, maybe she likes girls as well," Steve offered, "you'll never know until you tell her."

You shook your head immediately, "No. No, I couldn't. She means everything to me, I can't lose her." Robin and Steve exchanged a look. "I mean it's not that bad. She's pretty when she's happy.." You smile weakly while gazing at Nancy, knowing you cant risk ruining the bright smile on her face. She glanced over at you and offered a small wave, not waiting for a response before turning back to the wall of movies. You sucked in a sharp breath and looked at your feet again, biting your lip to stop the tears from falling. 

"Maybe she just... doesn't know you're an option?" Robin egged, willing you not to feel this way after witnessing the encounter, "let her know."

"Robin, it's okay," you turned to her, smiling to reassure her. "I'm okay. I’m her best friend, and her best friend wouldn't sacrifice her happiness for a selfish reason."

Robin nodded. She knew you were right, but that's not what you wanted. More than anything, you wanted to be with Nancy.

----------

Nancy was a writer, she was comfortable with the grey area of literature, but was also very versed in the logic of science and math, the right and wrong. You were only fond of the logic, you didn't understand that grey area that was up for interpretation. There was no 'maybe' or 'possibly' to you. Only 'yes' and 'no', 'right' and 'wrong'.

Your mind was made. Nancy had never talked about liking girls with you, she rarely talked about anything other than her relationships and schoolwork and journalism. In your mind, this was her expression of telling you that she only liked guys. You were each other's best friend, out of all people, you would be the first to know about her sexuality.

But maybe the real reason Nancy didn't tell you was that she was scared of losing you.

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 49 – SMUT PT. 2

Supersoldier Superserum Superspunk or Why SHIELD Can't Have Nice Things by tourdefierce

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 8,945 Tags: Established Relationship, Hypersensitivity, Supersoldier Serum

Summary: There were lots of things that really pissed Tony off about Fury's precious SHIELD but most of them had to do with their epic incompetency and how they always, always found a way to steal Tony's favorite toys and break them.

Reasons why I love it: The entire premise of this fic is like catnip to me. I adore it when authors explore the effects of the super soldier serum on Steve's sexual health, and this fic is no exception. Steve's struggle and his desperation is incredibly hot, so if you're into that sort of thing, I bet you'll love this one just as much as I do!

Predilections by windsweptfic

Pairing: Steve/Bucky/Tony Rating: E Words: 1,853 Tags: Threesome, PWP, Light Bondage

Summary: Irredeemable OT3 smut. No plot whatsoever.

Reasons why I love it: I don't know why more people don't capitalize on Tony's physical strength in smut, but I'm so happy that this one does, because it's the hottest thing ever. The Winteriron in the beginning is utterly delectable, and then Steve comes in and takes it to the next level. It's fantastic, and you should definitely read it!

Hand in glove I stake my claim by sphagnum

Pairing: Bucky/Tony, Steve/Bucky/Tony, Tony/Bruce, Tony/Clint Rating: E Words: 8,759 Tags: A/B/O, Public Claiming, Loss of Virginity

Summary: “Do you have any questions for me?” Father Coulson asked, his tone gentle. Bucky shook his head. They’d covered every aspect of the seeking ceremony in the last several weeks, and there was nothing else Bucky wanted to know now that Father Coulson would be able to tell him. “You don’t have to choose anyone,” Father Coulson reminded him. His hands were steady as he held a long strip of linen in his outstretched hands, offering it on open palms. “You can stay with us another year, or as many years as you spend on this earth, if you feel called to.” “I know,” Bucky said, not wasting any time on further explanations. They both knew he wasn’t going to stay at the convent forever. Steve was out there somewhere, and Bucky was going to find him. He took the strip of linen from Coulson and laid it over his eyes, tying it into a loose knot behind his head.

Reasons why I love it: This take on A/B/O is utterly fascinating, and I would gladly read a million more words in this universe. The Winteriron in chapter one is amazing, and I love the whole concept of the claiming process, but I also really enjoyed seeing the backstory of Tony's relationship with Bruce and Clint in the second chapter. I adore this fic, and I bet you will too, so I hope you give it a shot!

Think Dirty To Me by newtypeshadow

Pairing: Steve/Bucky/Tony Rating: E Words: 3,043 Tags: Involuntary Telepathy, Domestic Avengers, Dirty Thoughts

Summary: A magic spell aimed at Steve hits Tony too—but everything's fine! Until Steve starts thinking lustful thoughts about his boyfriend, Bucky, and Tony can hear them. Cue awkwardness (Steve), science (Tony), and scheming while being a shit (Bucky).

Reasons why I love it: Bucky is such a fucking troll, oh my god, I love him. They all feel perfectly in character here, and if they really got into this situation, I imagine this is exactly what would happen. This fic is equally funny and hot, and you should definitely read it!

For Science by copperbadge

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 1,631 Tags: Masturbation, Voyeurism, Sex Tapes

Summary: Tony discovers top-secret footage of Steve Rogers pre- and post-serum. And discovers why it’s top secret.

Reasons why I love it: This is super hot, holy shit. The premise alone is god-tier, and as always, copperbadge's writing style just takes it to the next level. I love how they banter even as they're getting down and dirty, and the ending is perfection. This fic is wonderful, and if you haven't read it yet, you definitely should!

[museumgiftshoperaser]

some thoughts on disability in fanfiction

I have so many thoughts about the common “trope” within the stranger things fandom to give specifically Steve a disability in fanfiction. A lot of my thoughts on this are mixed in with my own complicated feelings about becoming (physically) disabled over the past few years. Which is why i have a hard time writing about it objectively or maybe even fairly. Because some of it brings up a lot of negative emotions regarding ableism I’ve personally experienced. And I’m also still unpacking a lot of internalized ableism so maybe I’m not (yet) able to critique some of this stuff properly. And obviously a lot of these stories are written by people who deal with these (or any) disabilities themselves as a way to explore the topic. I love those! I think writing is such an excellent way of exploring your own feelings. So any of my critisisms aren’t about people using (fan)fiction to write about their own experiences. I’ve read some absolutely incredible works about this topic!!

A lot of these pieces of fanfic featuring Steve with a disability (you typically see either being HOH, having epilepsy or migraines) tend to fall within the larger hurt/comfort trope. And that makes sense, I guess. I also understand the need/desire for disabled people to read or write stories about characters being comforted through the struggles of disability. But I find that often these stories, especially when written by able bodied people, can fall into some harmful tropes.

The main issue that comes up for me is the romanticization of taking away bodily autonomy of the disabled person. The character, most often Steve in this case, is written as struggling with a disability and having a hard time coming to terms with this and then another character “forces” them to get better or accept help and by doing so takes away their agency in the situation. I don’t care if it’s “”the right thing to do”” or “”he really needed someone to help him”” if you’re taking away someone’s autonomy in a situation that’s kinda fucked up. (there’s some nuance there in cases of severe mental health issues where someone might hurt themselves, but even there autonomy is incredibly important and I’m largely talking about physical disability here). This also includes a lack of autonomy in who gets to know about a characters disability and how they find out. Disabled people aren’t owed anyone info about their health and people learning about it against someone’s will can be very upsetting. Another prominent trope is using disability as a way to explore self-sacrificial elements of Steve’s character. It’s the ‘he always cares for other people first and forgets to care for himself’-thing that is often explored with his character. Writers will turn this character trait on its head by ‘giving’ Steve a disability and thus forcing him to reckon with needing and being deserving of care. There’s nothing inherently wrong with that as an idea. I think many people who become disabled struggle with asking for help and feelings of guilt surrounding this. Which is what makes this a difficult concept to critique. I have a hard time puting into words exactly what rubs me the wrong way about this. But let me just say there is definitely a difference between attempts at exploring disability and turning disabled people into poor little babies who can’t do anything for themselves and oh isn’t that just so sad? Especially when a story lacks correct information about what a disabled person would or would not be able to do themselves. There’s also so much infantilization going on in those cases.

And there’s obviously disabled people with (very) high support needs, but pity and infantilization is never an appropriate reaction. Also! Plenty of disabled people have worked through that shit and are (no longer or were never) constantly feeling guilty about needing care! It’s a logical emotion to go through in our ableist society, but I feel like we could do with more representation of disabled people who don’t feel like horrible burdens just for existing. I say this because people irl are sometimes genuinely confused when I don’t feel bad or guilty or embarrased about asking for accomodation. There’s almost an expectation that we’re supposed to feel bad about requiring assistance and that’s pretty fucked up. I don’t want to give specific examples because I can’t think of any of the top of my head, but also because I’m not writing this to call anyone out. I feel like this fandom has correctly noticed that Steve’s had one too many hits to the head and I think the desire to explore this as a community could be a very positive thing. We should just be mindful of the actual lived experiences of disabled people and use this as an opportunity to educate ourselves about disability and ableism. Not just use it as a way to project fantasies about being cared for onto disabled people. I think that’s what sometimes can go wrong here. Able bodied people might project their desires about being doted on and cared for (VERY valid desires!) onto these characters. But disabled people have different needs and wants regarding being cared for! You often cannot copy your own desire to have a break from your insanely busy life (again, valid desire) and have someone take over for you for a little while onto disabled people without accidentaly perpetuating ableist ideas. You might also run into trouble when you project your own desire to be helpful and needed onto characters who take care of a disabled person. This can be a bit more of a gray area (imo) because caring for loved ones is obviously a great thing. I just think it’s important to keep in mind whether the focus is on wanting to be the person who helps someone and actually helping a disabled person according to their own wishes and standards. These are some very rambly thoughts, but I hope they can prompt some people to have a look at their own ways of reading and writing about disabled people. I think an absolutely necessary first step is to consider whether you are taking bodily autonomy into account, but there are many more nuances into properly writing about disabled people. There’s also always just the option of... not writing about disability if it’s not something you fully understand. Sometimes the latter might be the best route to take.

I’d loved to hear some thoughts from other disabled people!

[greatunironic]

eating in the underworld makes me want to scream! I'm so excited for this latest instalment and to unravel this world even further with each POV. I forget if you said but will Steve be getting a POV eventually? I'm so intrigued by Steve's relationship with Max and Lucas in this one given his absence

maybe, maybe not!! steve's pov has always been the most intriguing concept for this world for me but, at the same time, i've struggled with what, exactly, the plot would be for it; so only time will tell!!!

as for max + lucas -- i think lucas, particularly, is shaped by his absence in a similar way to robin, where he looked up to steve in a particular way + then tried to become a shadow of him. lucas, i think, is one of the boys who is most impacted by the perception of what it means to be The Man and masculinity; especially with max in season four -- i think he believes he needs to be The Man to protect those he loves, and her in particular, you know? and while i am ride or die for the sinclair parents, and how much lucas clearly looks up to his own father, there's something about lucas latching onto the image of steve as Peak Manhood for lucas that is v interesting to me, especially within the context of this universe.

and for max -- well, not to traumatize my girl more, but i think she probably already looked up to him as a brother figure (bother figure) because of how he stepped in to help her. losing billy (obviously) did a number on her, given her conflicting emotions re: him + his place in her life; but then to watch what happened happen and to emerge from the destruction and learn steve is also gone?