#and i think it's even funnier to imagine that the social media of the kid's art school just has a post of a badge saying “KILL💖”

[museganjin]

edit: eye design on the pin is based off of this video tutorial by yurie sekiya, creator of pero pero sparkles.

[sillimancer]

so I've been watching Bluey and I'm on episode 37/52 in series 1 so I feel like I've seen enough of it to have genuine thoughts (I skimmed the wikipedia page too)

the reason I started watching it was because of its reputation among millennials with kids who have been swearing up and down that it's basically free therapy for our age group. I'm definitely in the market to having my brain chemistry altered but after 37 episodes, I don't know that I'm there yet. there is still a lot of show left to go though, and some of the most-circulated clips I've seen on social media have been in episodes I haven't come across yet, so that is subject to change.

what I CAN say is that Bluey is objectively a very good tv show that 100% deserves its Peabody award. it's thoughtful, fun, and honestly funnier than it has any right to be. I've laughed out loud more than once. Joe Brumm made the show with the intention of it being entertaining for both kids and parents and he absolutely nailed that balance, I think. in that way, it's not a kid show; it's a family show. and I like that (and I'm pleasantly surprised by how well it works!).

I haven't been a kid for a long time so it's hard for me to put myself in the shoes of a child, especially in a world that is so drastically different from mine. I think this is the first kid show I've seen that prominently features things like smartphones. I know those shows exist--the new Blue's Clues is a good example of how things have been updated to suit modern audiences--but it's something that caught my eye as an Old Fart (in internet years). Not as a bad or good thing, just as a "wow I'm getting older and it's getting harder to relate to or even understand childhood" kind of way. Maybe that's why people want to be parents so badly. To reconnect with that. I can sympathize with that feeling.

the show focuses a lot on Bluey and her sister and friends navigating the world through imaginative play, which I love and has a solid backing in child developmental psychology. I actually just started learning a little bit about play therapy (I follow a play therapist on tiktok who kinda got me into it, I love her), so I feel like I've been getting a little bonus bit of enrichment out of the show for that. it's like when you're watching a movie that's partly in another language and you don't speak the language but you recognize it and can maybe pick out a couple words? it's like that.

I think Brumm really captured lightning in a bottle with this project. you can feel the love it's made with. the storylines are grounded with just the right touch of an almost magical or fantastical quality that really makes you feel childlike wonder even as a cynical and deeply depressed 30-something. There's conflict and mess, sure, but built on a foundation of safety and community, and I think that's probably what's resonating with (american) millennials. we inherited so much instability and pain from our previous generations that it's hard to believe a world or even a family unit like Bluey's could exist. parents who love each other? who are active in their children's lives? who apologize when they do something wrong? COULDN'T BE US!

all this to say I'm enjoying the show, it's heartwarming, it's charming, it's delightful, and I hope Joe Brumm lives forever. but it's also very much designed for children so like. I worry the millennial parents crying over this show on tiktok may be overselling it.

[leilabarak]

"Honestly, I have no idea," she admitted with a soft chuckle. When it came to all things pop culture, she was really not the person you'd want to ask to confirm anything. Her knowledge was limited to the handful of little corners of the world that she found herself intrigued by. "It's...you know, I probably haven't actually watched Ghostbusters since I was a little kid. I only kind of remember it, so maybe it was funnier than I'm thinking it is." She was willing to bet that Dean had a better grasp of it than she did, certainly.

Face crumpling together in a look of distaste, Leila could only imagine the type of offers that came through on social media. It was bad enough on the handful of dating apps she occasionally attempted to browse, but to open things up to anyone and everyone to respond had to be a different level of terrible.

"That is...not at all surprising. Some of the messages I get on the dating apps even are just...yikes," she admitted with a shake of her head. It was why, more often than not, she found herself struggling to say yes to meet up with anyone from the internet. "At least some of them are being nice, though. But, oh, I don't know about like a long line. Or any line, really." Her head shook a few times, not one to ever expect that aspect of her life to take off in any capacity.

Giving him a thumbs up, Leila grabbed one of her tokens to get ready for the machine, letting Dean take the lead in starting off the filming session. "First time! I've never seen this one before. So, I guess expectations, um. Probably some ghosts. Definitely some busting. It's pretty old, so the graphics are...very outdated. I could probably make a prettier game." Leila paused to think if she had anything else specific to say before giving a single nod to show she was done.

@deanchaiyachet

"Is it, though?" Dean furrowed his brows, one hand, the one that wasn't holding his phone, moved up to scratch the back of his neck as he thought about it. "I've always seen it as a comedy, though. I mean, chances are, I'm probably wrong anyway." Because he actually considered himself to be not that well-versed in many things, and he was okay with that. He would gladly play the dumb friend, especially around someone as smart as Leila.

Then, he went on to explain what she should do, and how she should do it, which, shouldn't be too hard for anyone, especially since he would be there, chatting with her in the first place, so he thought it wouldn't look too fake.

At her question, the streamer shrugged innocently. "Well... some. But most of all the guys that have messaged me we sort of gross, so I'd rather not have my best friend go out with them." He would apologize for his gender, but it wasn't his fault that guys were usually this gross. "The girls are much nicer, though. They're always complimenting her, and saying nice things about her. I bet there would be a long line of ladies waiting for you, okay?"

He smiled, that same, childish grin of his, before he raised his phone to start recording her. "You ready?" And after a response from her, Dean tapped on the recording button on his screen. "So, Lei. My lil Charmander... this is your first time playing this game, yeah? What are your expectations?" / @leilabarak

[theravenkin]

the foxes and social media pt. 1:

okay i have a lot of headcanons involving the foxes

and social media so there will be several of these. but

a neil edit on tiktok made me think about the fanbase

in the books…like what if people started making edits

of these players. like either "uwu my golden child" or

horny shit thirsting over them. i am CRACKING UP

OVER THIS BECAUSE IMAGINE:

nicky and dan are the ones who a. use tiktok

regularly and b. have exy stuff on their fyp. one of

them get an edit of KEVIN DAY on their fyp and they

LOSE IT because think about it; it's either gonna be

something portraying him as this sweet, cute,

easygoing guy with his fake smile shots from the

press, or it's gonna make him seem like some kind of

sex god with a caption like "kevin day please rail me

and give me your kids". either one is so hilariously not

the real kevin. and also just hilarious considering he's

such an unlikeable nerd most of the time (from the

pov of the foxes, kevin stans don't come for me-)

they show him and the rest of the team the edit while

they're all in the locker room together and he turns

beet fucking red, wide eyed, you know The Look. and

the rest of the foxes? fucking LOSE IT. even andrew

chortles a little.

(actually, neil is the only one that doesn't laugh--he is

even more fucking bewildered than kevin. he's so

confused. it makes everyone laugh harder.)

and it doesn't stop then; the foxes start searching for

all the kevin fan content they can and will not let him

live it down, EVER. (but of course, they keep all the

shit about him and riko away from him--some of

them even report that stuff.)

but oh. OH. once neil gets a little more famous, a bit

of a following.the edits and thirsty posts don't stop.

this is even funnier to the foxes, because he is so

goddamn clueless, way more than kevin. he doesn't

understand how people can enjoy him so much as a

person, or think he's so attractive, that they actually

share it with millions of other people?? he's

like…these people must have no fucking life, like why

me of all people???

the foxes tease him about the praise his fans send;

some of them [[nicky]] even ask andrew if he's

running these fan accounts in secret. [[it didn't end

well for nicky but it sure was funny]]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZM8YMpB1qL <<this tiktok

was the inspiration for the rant above, i couldn't stop

imagining it in the books' universe with real pictures

instead of fanart and then with kevin instead of neil,

nicky putting on a full performance of the song @

kevin, ugh i cant get enough of this hc okay

[mk-wizard]

Big Hero 6 The Series: It could have been better

Hello, friends. Today, I will be analyzing a TV series based on a movie that I fell in love with for its colourful themes, deep plot, compelling characters, great CGI and memorable messages. Before I get into it, I want to take a moment to say that I have quit doing videos. They are too big of a pain in the petunia to make and I write better than I speak, so I will stick to writing essays, reviews and more. Anyway, onto the analysis.

All I can say about Big Hero 6 the series is that it had a great concept, it presented some great ideas and tried hard to be a cartoon of the times, but it could have and should have been a lot better. The show’s downfall all centers around trying too hard to be kid friendly which makes the shame sting all the more because Big Hero 6 was already kid friendly even with its dark themes, sharp edges and intelligent writing. If anything, even the brightest kid friendly cartoons (Steven Universe, She-Ra, etc.) had those things and actually benefitted from them. By needlessly trying too hard, character development got scrapped, the edges were all smoothed out, storytelling was subpar, the humour was too silly and the executive meddling in the end produced a dismal final season. However, I don’t want this analysis to be one lengthy negative rant about how awful the series was because in its defense, awful is an unfair word. It did have potential and ideas which are worth carrying over to a reboot that I hope will be done someday in the future. Also, we should root for a reboot because Big Hero 6 would not be the first story that needs it before striking gold. Just look at how many times Spider-Man was rebooted in film before MCU found the version that worked. Anyway, I will list all the things in Big Hero 6 that could have been better in my opinion;

1- Go easy on the laughs and be more generous with the action. - I love adding comedy to my own writing because I think a good sense of humour makes everything better, but Big Hero 6 is not a stand up comedy routine. It is a superhero story where we expect action, suspense and life or death situations that are to be taken seriously first. The comedy should be for relief and with the right timing. Also, the chibi cutscenes and having characters act like fools aren’t funny. Ren and Stimpy are the exception not the standard and their way of making you laugh doesn’t fit an action series. In a show as big as Big Hero 6, real life physics and danger matters.

2- Make the villains menacing and gritty. - I admit that after having a movie villain like Yokai who was the stuff of nightmares, it is going to be a challenging act to follow, but it was obvious that the writers were trying especially with some villains who could have easily gone into some dark relatable territory. For example, Mr. Sparkles (the gentleman in the photo above) embodies social media and Internet personalities. Right off the bat, you have a long list of things which embody the dark side of that like scams, fraud, using social media to dox or harass, driving people to suicide, online predators, the Internet personalities being very depressed people in real life, and much more horrifying things. When you stop and look at it, Mr. Sparkles even looks like the Joker which hints how dark and scary he could have been if the stops were removed. The same goes for enemies like Hardlight who embodies online gaming, Liv with cloning, Obake an amoral and insane scientist, and Trina and Noodle Burger Boy (more on him later) being evil robots. Globby especially should have been painted and written in much darker colours rather being played off for laughs because he has many parallels with Clay Face. The only two villains who I can say were supposed to be campy, charming and comical were Baron Von Steamer and Supersonic Sue because they were a satire of the Adam West style villains.

The rest of them needed to be dark and threatening including Mr. Sparkles. In fact, I would love a rebooted version of Mr. Sparkles who gives me the heebie-jeebies. Going back to Noodle Burger Boy, I must confess that I was actually excited when I heard that he was going to be the main villain of the final season because I thought he was going to fulfill his master’s final wish and as a reminder, Noodle Burger Boy was based on a super robot for military purposes.

It would have been fantastic if Noodle Burger Boy was upgraded into a full military war machine with a new threatening look. For that, I think all of the villains deserve to be rebooted and have their full potential unlocked for better or for worse.

3- A show about geniuses merits genius level art quality. - I am usually forgiving towards art styles, but in the case of Big Hero 6, the oversimplified style with minimal details and lack of textures did not suit the show. The characters blend in with the background which makes them look flat and the special effects were extremely dulled down. I also know for a fact that Disney can do a lot better than this because I saw how superbly Tangled the Series was drawn.

You can see and almost feel the difference in quality, the number of layers and level of detail between the two styles. I think there was no excuse Big Hero 6 was not done in the same style and at the same level if not better as Tangled.

3- Don’t dumb down or flanderize amazing characters. - I absolutely detest it when characters are flanderized because it makes them one dimensional and grating. For example, Go Go is tough as nails and extremely calm, but she is not cold or hesitant towards helping her friends. She doesn’t require very special episodes for us to know that. If anything, the movie version of Go Go reminded me a lot of Garnet in how she deconstructed the broody character. She isn’t cold or emotionless. Just calm and mature. Another good example was how Honey Lemon was rewritten to be overly positive to the point of toxicity, naïve and oblivious with a juvenile obsession with stickers. Then you have poor Fred who was rewritten to be an incompetent fool. The spark that makes Big Hero 6 shine is that they are a team of geniuses meaning they are all intelligent. Even Fred is genius in his own way just not a scientific one. He has a vivid imagination, he is resourceful and can get himself out of tight spots. Please, don’t turn characters into dummies especially if their intelligence is a part of them. It doesn’t make them better or funnier. It ruins them.

4- Tadashi needs closure and honour. - I am all for Hiro making peace with the loss of his brother, but Tadashi is to the Big Hero 6 team what Uncle Ben was to Spider-Man. His loss was the catalyst if not the reason. He should never be forgotten. Moreover, there was never any true closure to him especially with the possibility that he may still be alive up in the air. After all, like Callaghan, his body was never found and it turned out that Callaghan was still alive.

With that said, who is to say that Tadashi was not secretly still alive and just hiding or being hidden? This is something that Disney really needed to clear up if not for the fans, then at least as a service to such an important character. Never just forget about them.

5- The format can only be episodic with a deep plots, continuity and character development. - Random episodes with a mere monster of the day is an outdated format which doesn’t fit Big Hero 6′s modern and bright setting. In seasons 1 and 2, when the episodes were plot heavy with character development, the series shined brightest. It also helped move the story along, but with the final season, plot was removed, closure was abandoned or poorly written if any was given, and characters were disallowed from growing. A good example at how plot and character development could have made this series and its characters better was the relationship between Hiro and Megan. Would it have truly survived or would they have broken up?

Would Richardson Mole have eventually lost interest in his obsession with besting and bullying Fred or would his obsession consume him compelling him to become a super villain? I do see quite a few similarities between Mole and Reverse Flash.

Then you have Karmi who is in my opinion, the biggest wild card of the bunch. She was intentionally introduced as an arrogant, prickly and unlikable yet complex character who rivaled Hiro bitterly.

Yet had a huge crush on his alter ego and as time went on, started to grow up and even form a friendship with Hiro. What would have happened further down the road with her? Would she have become a super hero herself? Or maybe even another love interest for Hiro kind of like how Black Cat is for Spider-Man?

Is Obake really gone?

What does the future hold Diana (Liv’s clone), Liv herself or the Sycorax the genetics company?

Is Alistair Krei going to become an ally to Big Hero 6 or an antagonist? There is also the issue at how little we know about the other Big Hero 6 characters other than Fred, Hiro and Baymax. What are Honey Lemon, Wasabi and Go Go’s backstories? These questions matter and while not every mystery can be solved, leaving none of them solved is lazy writing.

6- Executives, kindly stay out of the writing and any other part of the creative process. - I’m sorry, execs, but there is no nice way to say it. History itself proves that every time executives got involved in the creative process of any media, it got worse not better. Leave the writing to the creative team and the execs should only handle the legal stuff. Please. We understand that TV is a business, but writing itself is not. It is an art which you just don’t have a talent for. Let the creative people do their thing with the freedom necessary and you do your thing, deal? Deal.

7- Focus on Hiro and Baymax. - The are the main characters so keep them at the heart of the series no matter what happens around them. That is all I can say.

And that sums up all the things that could have made Big Hero 6 the series better, but this is all just my opinion. What is yours?

PS: I am well aware that the Big Hero 6 series is being retconned because a new series called Baymax is in the works as well as the long awaited sequel to the first movie. I am looking forward to both with an open mind. PPS: I also am aware that some people liked this show the way it was including the art style and I am cool with that. An analysis for art that includes cartoons is never right or wrong. It is solely based on opinion. I may have thought this series could have been better, but there are people who make arguments that it could have been worse.

[amicus-siderum]

Kaeya being a weird horse girl™ is so true to me anyway, but in a modern setting specifically I just know he collected all the horse posters from those teen girl magazines and plastered them all over his walls. There were some he stuck on the fridge too before Adelinde scolded him for it (gently told him to leave some room for Diluc's drawings too). Also his phone and computer backgrounds were pictures of horses he found on the internet or selfies he took with horses.

Venti dressing as he does in game makes me laugh so much! I imagine Diluc still owns a pub or something in a modern au, so he just sees Venti in his little medieval bard clothing and looks at the CCTV camera, The Office style, and goes "the guy from the pantomime back again". And honestly, I can't decide which music genre is funnier for Venti in this scenario! Like, indie? Rap!? Pop!?!? Every genre is funny and unexpected when my guy dressing in his little pantaloons and starts singing anything that isn't theatre!

Vampire Diluc!!! pLEASE! Him going through his little goth phase completely unintentionally, beelining for the rack of black clothing in the corner of every clothes shop because "all the other clothes are tacky". He always dresses in long sleeved shirts in the summer because he gets sunburnt too easily, and likes wearing all the vintage trousers and waistcoats because they "look elegant" and he's got the money. Kaeya would always laugh at him for it but then basically do the same thing in a different font. Lowkey reminds me of my boyfriend ngl. He too has an unintentionally pretentious style purely because he "wants to look smart" and I make fun of him for it

#princeinexile is trending in Khaenri'ah at least once every month. The people love Kaeya! They live for the drama of their exiled prince's life! I bet you there's a show too! Like Keeping Up With The Kardashians, except it's Keeping up With The Khaenri'ahn Royals and Kaeya doesn't know he's being filmed. He's like every other celebrity, except there's even more mystery and excitement around him because he doesn't actually know he is a celeb so he doesn't do interviews or anything, and people love dedicating their accounts to him and making edits and coming up with theories and headcanons. If Kaeya ever found this part of social media, I think he would have an aneurism.

Okay okay okay, listen. I think Rosaria would be the type of person to make a lot of sex jokes, but like in a tasteful goth way. She'd definitely tell people to call her mommy as a joke (or not as a joke), and she said it to Kaeya once and only once, because Kaeya promptly had a breakdown, told her that she does really resemble his mom and then a panic attack to top it all off. Rosaria to this day has not fully processed this but they both refuse to speak about it or even acknowledge it.

"Are you certain you are using it as prescribed!?" Kaeya just nods as the doctor starts crying at their desk because this is NOT NORMAL! "Are you sure you don't smoke or take drugs? Please!? I don't understand how goddamn traumatised you must be for your system to literally override THREE Different Types of Biological Medication!?!?!" They're like rocking back and forth while Kaeya just kinda sits there like, "yeah... it do be an issue, but like. I would like it solved please?" If the next one hadn't worked the doctor would have actually just prescribed vodka and resigned.

I don't even know what to say about the last one. Like. What? Kaeya got shown it by some kid from college and he had never been so relieved that he was abandoned and adopted by Crepus instead. Kaeya told the kid he had no idea who that man was and then went home and bleached his eyes.

[noddytheornithopod]

Time to see the Despair Sisters in DRS!

Mukuro

Mahiru’s taking photos of her. Mahiru actually is amazed at the photos in Junko’s magazines, but Mukuro brings out the whole “they’re edited” thing. She says it’s nice Mahiru is able to get more “real” photos of her, tragically Mukuro is in her Junko disguise, though.

Scene with Akane and Tenko. Tenko’s used to Akane stuffing herself between workouts so she can kinda now understand her when eating. Tenko thinks fashonistas get a bad rap cuz of sexist impressions of them. Tenko seems impressed by “Junko”, and also Akane apparently doesn’t know what social media is. :v Ignorance is bliss, Owari, ignorance is bliss.

Mukuro is reminiscing about her sister and being apart from her. Shirokuma appears. Mukuro vents about being apart from Junko without explicitly saying anything, basically.

Scene with Yasuhiro, who calls her... “Junkie dude”. Also Mukuro asks if he’s on something, which is funnier if you know fandom in-jokes lol. Okay, so Yasuhiro is doing a fortune on her (even if Mukuro doesn’t want it), and he says what he sees is about her anxieties. He sees... glossy black hair, which of course takes her back. After mentioning her makeup in the vision he offers to explain more, but he asks for money. :v

Mukuro, Toko and Mikan all in bikinis, okay then. :v It’s awkward for them. Mikan does her usual shtick, and Toko is all standoffish too, but Mukuro tries to keep them calm. She says they don’t have to dislike each other, Mukuro even mentions opposite personalities can attract, like Toko and Komaru, and Ibuki and Mikan (guess there’s some fodder for that heh). Mukuro lets it slip she feels like being too similar can make it hard to get along sometimes, and Toko is naturally confused because Mukuro said too much. :v She covers herself by saying they’re all schoolgirls, and Mikan rightfully points out that should mean nobody would get along if that were the case, lol.

Monaca recognises fake Junko and wants to meet the real one. Gonta interrupts, chasing a bug, and Mukuro actually catches it and gives it to him? When Gonta leaves, the mood is ruined, so they just agree to chat later.

Scene with Sakura and Ibuki. Ibuki is into the others being beefy (alright, Mukuro abs people now have even MORE reason to be mad). Mukuro is surprised, but Sakura actually agrees. Ibuki then wonders what it would be like if she got ripped lol. And it actually seems like... she’s gonna go for it. Sakura says just do what’s best for her (and Mukuro agrees), but she’ll offer to help if she desires. I now demand we see buff Ibuki fanart.

OMG flashback to real Junko, and we see her basically telling Mukuro is the one who should go in VR so she can scheme IRL.

Hajime thinks Mukuro should be true to herself, and from what we can see Mukuro seems like she kinda feels that way deep down.

Mondo tried to stop the kids using the rollercoaster but they just fucked with him and disappeared, Mukuro’s there to help him through it though. They end up talking about how they look and how they wish there was an option to look different in VR. Mukuro jokes he could try a look like Taka, which offends Mondo cuz their looks are still meant to reflect who they are. Plus, it probably wouldn’t change the kids’ opinions of him if he looked nicer anyway. Mukuro said she’d liked to have gone for a more serious look... in other words, herself. :P Mondo’s gut reaction is a look like Toko’s and can’t imagine it, lol. Mukuro says she agrees but that’s what makes it fun, and gives the example of turning Kyoko or Peko into fashionistas. Okay, THAT’s also gotta get fanart lol. Mondo also gives the example of turning Makoto and Shuichi into playboys... wow, stop fanart baiting (also...). It’s also hilarious that Mondo says that when as protagonists they have potential to romance several of the characters (Shuichi got the friggin love hotels even lmao). Mukuro agrees it would be funny but she also says it’s a bit late to be thinking about that. :P Look, if everyone was watching Saimatsu on the beach, I think I see what she’s getting at. :v Haven’t seen any Naegiri content so far but even besides that I kinda wonder if Mukuro is also thinking about how she likes Makoto too.

It’s Makoto! Mukuro went for a swim, and Makoto is impressed at her stamina cuz appearance of model. Mukuro just says she works out more than her peers. :P They then talk about about their futures and how some ultimates like unusual lives (like herself), and then Mukuro drags Makoto into the water with her.

Mukuro wonders why Toko isn’t with Byakuya, and he just denies ever being with her and... calls her a lemon? Mukuro wonders why Byakuya doesn’t have MORE girls after him... he clearly doesn’t care and hates this discussion, lol. Mukuro does think about how things are always weird in Hope’s Peak tho, eg her dressed as Junko and she’s still not popular herself. Byakuya asks why she’s even here, and she says she wants to swim, and enjoys having privacy vs drawing attention cuz fame. Byakuya... just says he has a private beach. :v Mukuro then wants in, much to his annoyance. Byakuya just says to call his butler about it... because he obviously wouldn’t join in, lol. He finally gives in... only to say he can’t promise he’ll be free cuz busy. :P

Aoi’s annoyed about not having her usual swimsuit, especially since one of her straps was... slipping. Mukuro says casual wear like these bikinis is fine and you can also “flaunt it”, but Aoi prefers practicality. Mukuro then basically says it brings out her curves and straight up says it’s sexy. :v Aoi still isn’t into it (nor should she be :v). Mukuro says it took time for her to get used to as well, and she still thinks the look suits her, lol.

Mukuro makes some trinkets for the festival, Hiyoko sees her make a Japanese style hairpin and she actually seems to like it even if it doesn’t compare to artisan stuff.

Tsumugi also is a bit too eager to get something in her “supporter colour” (is the implication that she’s being a Junko fangirl here?).

Ryoma is actually in a sentimental mood, and Mukuro lets him know she feels similarly with things about to end too.

Akane is eating so fast that Mukuro actually chimes in to give her more so Teruteru doesn’t run out for the others, lol.

Mukuro... actually goes back to Yasuhiro to get her fortune told. I wonder if him describing her true appearance was part of what brought her back? She decides to ask about her “family” and whether their goals will be achieved. If it’s a yes, it’s only a 30% chance Junko will plunge the world into despair, so uh yay for good odds?

Scene with Monokuma, huh? Basically... he’s testing her, to see if she’s still willing to do what Junko wants. Mukuro says yes even if she has to kill them because despite her fondness for her classmates she would despair and that would please her sister. Monokuma’s surprised at the lack of hesitation, so Mukuro says she’d be crying as she goes around killing everyone. Mukuro then asks if she hypothetically betrayed Junko and how much she’d despair, which shocks Monokuma. Mukuro then thinks about what would cause more despair for her sister, and Monokuma is impressed she’s grown to be more than just doing whatever she says. Her ending scene says she found her own hope too, so I wonder what that means...

Junko

Time to watch the same shit again with different results, lol.

Junko says she bored of despair and will play along with the hope shit... lol, let’s see how long THAT lasts.

First... Aoi? Junko noticed the strap slipping instantly, and Aoi wishes she had a suit more like Junko’s, lol. Junko says it’s nice to try new things, and that she chose the one piece for laughs, lol. Aoi naturally expected something really skimpy, but Junko wanted to subvert expectations. Aoi says it’s kinda deep, and Junko’s just all “too bad the boys probably wanted to see more skin from this barely legal bitch” (for the record, the “barely legal” and “bitch” parts AREN’T paraphrasing). However, she then says some people probably get off to swimsuits like this... is she referencing that weird school swimsuit fetish in Japan (YEAH THAT’S A THING APPARENTLY)? Aoi is naturally disturbed.

Junko is much more confident in front of the camera as expected, and basically convinces Mahiru to do shots of her modeling cuz she’s supposed to expand what she can do. She ends saying there’s someone she’d like to show them to... I wonder who? I guess Mukuro but IDK.

Akane and Tenko scene! This time, Tenko is amazed that Junko of course can understand what Akane is saying while talking. Lol, Tenko affectionately calls her gluttonous, while Akane says not to “glut-shame” her. :v Tenko quickly apologises, lol. Junko thinks maybe Akane needs to expand her vocabulary, while Akane is just all “if it’s good, it’s good”.

Okay so there seems to be exclusive swimsuit scenes, heh. Cuz here, Junko is with Kaede and Tsumugi. Kaede is in awe of Junko’s swimsuit and how... yeah. Tsumugi is similarly shocked, but... she KNOWS what’s up, and says Hifumi’s reaction would be interesting. Junko says to bet if he nosebleeds or even passes out. Kaede actually says the more she thinks about it, the more right it feels for Junko cuz as a fashionista, she can pull off anything. Junko seeing this then starts to think her suit wasn’t shocking enough, lol. Tsumugi then points out swimsuits don’t need to be a surprise or joke, and that she’s going to have to wear that for the whole trip. Junko sees them getting over it and she’s already bored of it, and Kaede and Tsumugi are basically like “too bad”. Kaede and Tsumugi suggest going to the beach, but Junko says her look would be “despairingly out of place” and wants to stick to pools only for the time being... until she gets bored of that, of course. Tsumugi finds her incomprehensible a lot, and Junko’s just all “it’s fun, plus you can’t fully understand anyone”.

Junko swimming! Effortlessly, and it bores her. Makoto is amazed like with Mukuro. When Makoto assumes she’d do exercise to keep her figure, Junko says she’d be perfect even without it, lol. Junko then mentions not having any hope feels empty, catching Makoto’s attention. Junko basically confesses she got bored of her original shtick. Makoto assures her she’s great and she’ll find something to live for, only for her to respond with “how hopeless” and says he has a poor judge of character. Also, Makoto seems to be aware of how corny he sounds. :P

Mondo time! Junko starts with the whole “be nicer to them”. Junko then says she’s what all girls wished they looked like, and Mondo likes to think the same for guys, but things change. Mondo decides what works for him best is what he feels is right for him. Junko says she didn’t expect fashion discourse, and notes how Mondo has softened over these few years in HP. She then talks about HP bringing everyone together was worth it, which naturally confuses Mondo. Junko plays it off as virtual world stuff.

Things already different with Mikan and Toko... Mikan is instantly happier Junko appears, while Toko is still Toko. Junko figures Toko has more bad relationships than good ones, but Toko sticks up for herself, mentioning she has a friend. Junko then pretends to be disappointed and says she thought they were friends, lol. Mikan completely buys into what Junko is saying, while Toko thinks it’s shallow and is disappointed Mikan would buy that. Seems Junko already knows how to play Mikan like a fiddle, or Mikan is maybe just a SIMP, lol. Weirdly my approach to friends is kinda similar to Toko, at least IRL I find it really hard to call people my friends.

Monaca’s talking about... Haiji... to Junko. When Gonta shows up, a bug lands on Junko, and she says she’s popular even with bugs lol. Gonta thinks it must like her, and Junko says while she’s joking, maybe he has a point.

Junko told Toko Byakuya was at the beach, and says she’s giving a heads up... sure. :v Junko tries to continue her thing, but Byakuya’s already done with her. Byakuya just wants her to cut to the chase (also apparently the boys are having a barbecue in the woods and Junko feels above it, lol). Byakuya notices she has a lack of drive and is surprised, and Junko feigns shock that he’s “concerned”. Byakuya just finds it obvious, and Junko after some tangent about how she should become a shut in in her room cuz teasing Byakuya isn’t fun says that if she leaves Toko will appear. Byakuya then decides to leave himself. Junko is just there bored, now.

Junko talks to Kaede about getting tired of what she cares about, ie despair. Kaede is given a scenario with say she gives up on piano, and she naturally considers it unthinkable and would get depressed pretty easily. Junko is happy to just chat now, have a drink and make her laugh. She ends saying she despaired over despairing about despair. :P

Junko talks to Shirokuma and is actually upfront about it, and Shirokuma is shocked about it. Junko says this event happening to her is also despairing, lol. Despairing over despair and being tired of it, she says she might as well be nothing now, cuz to her she IS despair. Junko concludes she’s in despair no matter where she goes.

Aoi is impressed at Junko’s swimming, saying if she kept it up she’d have a legit rival. Aoi really admires Junko, and Junko almost lets her problem slip. She ends up saying if you took away everything that would make a person, they’d end up changing. When Aoi finds that thought uncomfortable, Junko says she promises that wouldn’t happen... provided she stays tired of despair.

Ibuki and Sakura... Ibuki seems to like Junko here too, lol. Junko has abs confirmed? Ibuki considers being swole, Junko says she’s fine how she is, but Ibuki says she’s willing to try and be the best she can. Junko and Sakura agree they both wonder if there’s still more potential for them to be reached.

Yasuhiro calls her Junkie here too, lol. He says he notices her acting differently, like she’s worried. Yasuhiro tries to get her to let him tell her fortune, while she knows exactly what he does, even breaking down his whole ordeal. :v Yeah, she declines.

Junko... doing fortune telling? Lol. She actually does it because she’s analysed everyone so well, and she decides she can just give really vague stuff to get away with it. First up, Monaca. Junko basically just says she’ll get into despair, and even despair about that despair.

Kaede sees Junko trying this and is curious so gives it a shot, heh. Junko says her positivity and optimism might backfire one day, but she should keep being herself anyway. Kaede agrees this is what she does best so decides to keep being herself. Junko is curious to see where she’ll end up. Also... I feel like Junko kinda summed up her story in V3. Dammit Junko, do you wanna make me cry again? Eh, she probably would.

Yasuhiro now says “Junky”, and sees a rival. :P Junko reassures him it’s just because it’s a unique day, so Hiro asks for his fortune told. Junko just says this will always be his life, which makes Yasuhiro freak out and says he only wants to hear himself be free of debt collectors. Junko says she could show him true despair and end his life to herself.

Junko asks Kaito if he’s afraid of the fire, lol. He isn’t, but also says without fear you can’t prepare for danger, but if you’re not prepared and are scared in the moment, you’re doomed. Junko then says what he really fears is probably losing the fire in his heart.

Chiaki on the other hand does fear fire, cuz it’s often bad news in games. Junko says something can be a source of hope or despair depending on perspective.

Komaeda also fears, but he also sees fire symbolising optimism and hope. They compare it to having a dangerous ally, Komaeda says sometimes some terror and misfortune is necessary for hope. Junko asks what if there isn’t any hope at the end and you just suffer, and Komaeda of course rebukes that, saying hope is destined to shine. Junko then only pretends to listen to him, lol.

Lol, Junko’s end cutscene starts with her reminiscing to Monokuma about basically doing the plot of DR2. :P Wait, uh oh... she seems to be feeling inspired again? Junko also implies she even gets bored of sleeping and eating, and that those people do exist when Monokuma says people wouldn’t get bored of that. :v She then says when you lose hope, even doing basic necessities is troublesome. She then talks about how seeking despair in itself is hope, and she is the result of failing to resolve that. They’re intertwined. If one lacks hope in living, despair becomes its own hope. Monokuma sees she’s despairing over despair, and even offers to kill her, lol. Junko then says she haves hope to scare Monokuma, and offer despair. Junko says she’s actually serious despite Monokuma���s surprise, thinking that hope will be the only way she can return to her old self, she wants the things she always craved. Somehow, Junko pushes deeper into despair even as she grows tired of it, lol.

Her end card is her asking if she’ll ever be free of despair. Dammit Junko, I was rooting for you to break your endless cycle of despair and despair and despair and despair and despair and desp

Lol YouTube comments being mad that she suddenly isn’t into despair anymore, even though a) it’s still all about despair, it’s just a weird new (and honestly fascinating) take on it, and b) it’s nice to do something new with her

[queen-erika-the-songful]

Okay, here are my initial thoughts on Princess Adventure. These are in no way organized; they’re just as I can remember them. Feel free to send asks if you want

- Barbie defending Chelsea’s creativity and imagination is great to see. It’s one of the best parts of Dreamhouse Adventures so it’s nice to see them continue that in this film

- I like “Try It On” a lot more now. It’s not my favorite, and I think it’s one of the weaker songs in comparison to the rest of the soundtrack, but it’s honestly kind of a bop.

- “It’s like they don’t even want me in this movie!” LOL even Tammy herself knows she’s been done an absolute injustice.

- Holy crap Amelia’s plan is so freaking funny to me. She could’ve just, like...invited Barbie over to her kingdom since she’s the princess and was already a fan of Barbie’s vlogs anyway. But nah, she’s gotta have this whole convoluted “cultural exchange” bullshit I just can’t

- Speaking of Amelia, it’s a little disappointing that we don’t spend nearly as much time with her as we do with Barbie, and, thus, we don’t get to see who the supposed “real” her really is. She says she finally got to explore things about herself, like her fears and dreams, but she never goes into details. Ironically, the audience never gets to see who the true Amelia is, we just have to go off what she said about “who [she] is does matter”. I mean, we certainly get glimpses of it (again, the convoluted plan - she’s obviously ‘act first think later’), but overall it’s not nearly enough, at least to me

- “(Not A) Picture Perfect Girl” might just be my favorite song from this movie. It honestly made me tear up a bit. We’ll see if that changes over my next rewatches

- The running gag with Trey mixing up Barbie and Amelia while Ted and Ned knew was a lot funnier than I expected it to be

- Trey is now trans and you can’t change my mind.

- I really appreciate “Somewhere New” a lot more now since seeing it in the movie. I love that the choreography starts on the plane. It was a cool choice that really felt like a “musical” thing to do. I also like that everyone got to sing at leaset a line or two on their own. 

- WTF happened between Floravia and Johanistan? Did they have a war or something? Why are they being united into just a bigger Floravia? It sounds pretty fishy. I can understand why Johan is so upset based on what little information is given to us, so I wish they had gone into it a bit more.

- Johan asked “Amelia” (Barbie in disguise) if she remembered what they said they would do as rulers when they were kids. That never comes back and it really bothered me. What was the promise? That they’d rule together? That they’d treat each other’s kingdom equally? I actually thought at the coronation that Amelia would give the answer to that question (something like “Johan, remember what we told each other...”) and then do something like absolve the treaty so that she and Johan would rule their own respective kingdoms. l

- IDK, I think I would’ve just liked it more if Johan had been like Amelia’s brother/cousin/whatever that wanted to become King. He’d be a more boring villain that way but it would be less complicated than this.

- WE GOT REPRISES OF 2 SONGS BUT THEY AREN’T ON THE SOUNDTRACK?! I will NOT stand for that. As soon as the movie comes out on DVD I’m ripping those tracks out and adding them to my playlist

- I really thought Ken and Barbie were finally going to get together. I shall now accept my clown shoes and wig. I’m already applying the makeup now.

- The sequence for “Life in Color” disappointed me a bit. It’s one of my favorite songs on the soundtrack, but the placement in the movie felt like it came out of nowhere. I was really hoping for a nice, tender moment between Barbie and Amelia. Even if they were kept separated, it could’ve started with them video-chatting again. Maybe they’d talk about their personal struggles and then Barbie would stop the recording (”We don’t have to film this...”) and they’d just have a moment between themselves to talk.

- On the other hand, “King of the Kingdom” was such a good scene. It was very entertaining and I laughed a lot (which I had to hold back a lot since I was still at work). Also, those boys can move!!

- To make up for all of the interruptions and missed opportunities, Ken Carson deserves at least 3 episodes centered on him and his life and 1 where he finally tells Barbie how he feels

- TAFFY HAD NO REASON TO BE IN THIS MOVIE. I don’t care that Barbie almost always needs an animal sidekick. Snowy (Amelia’s bunny) fills that role. Taffy just gave everyone a freaking heart attack. Also, how the heck did she survive the plane ride? California to Floravia is a 10-hour flight so how did she stay unnoticed for so long?? ROBERTS FAMILY, GET SOME DAMN LEASHES!

- Speaking of that scene, I hate it. It ate up valuable time that could’ve been later spent developing the plot or Amelia’s character. It was only like 2 minutes but in a movie that is already pretty short (1hr11min) every second counts

- Can DA please finally drop the whole “Hey look Renee is claustrophobic” already? It’s repetitive as all hell and honestly it rubs me the wrong way how often it’s played for laughs. It works in the DA Halloween episode since it’s all about everyone facing their fears but everywhere else it feels like a cheap & undeserved laugh (it only happens twice in the movie I think but I wanted to mention it anyway)

- Morningstar being a little bitch to Barbie was hilarious. I don’t really like animal toys anymore but I’d totally buy her. (She’s part of a doll-horse set called Prance & Shimmer Horse. The Barbie doll has Amelia’s princess dress).

- “This is My Moment” really warmed my heart. The last shot with Amelia and Barbie smiling at each other reminded me a lot of Princess & the Popstar actually. I also really like how they brought back stuff from “Try It On” for Barbie’s verse. Musical finale numbers that bring back earlier motifs is something I just cannot get enough of. 

- I liked Alfonso. Like Amelia said, he means well; he just didn’t put as much thought into what Ameila herself wants as he could have. But hey, he was learning just as much as they were

- I LOVED all of the stuff with Barbie trying to make it big and that bitch Rose Ross being all “This is what you have to do to make it sweetie :)” like that’s a great thing to show to kids. You can want to be famous and expand your content like Barbie wanted to, but you have to be smart about it, and you have to stay true to yourself. That plotline also mixed pretty well with Amelia’s life being formulated for the public too. I really did like all of that stuff about how media, social media especially, is constantly fabricated and edited to make things seem easier/better than they might be in real life. 

- THEY FINALLY WENT BACK TO INDIVIDUAL END MORALS THANK GOD. I got really tired of seeing “This is our story, what’s yours?” after every Barbie movie, especially when every movie that used it wasn’t going for that message. Hell, that’s not even a lesson or anything, that’s just a random end quote.

- “Life doesn’t happen on camera. Life is what happens when the cameras are off” THAT IS SO GOOD AND RELEVANT I CAN’T EVEN!!!

[byfulcrums]

ARHGEJDHF THAT ART???? YOUR ART IS SO GOOD ASJAAAA

"Yelling at each other to shrink. Threatening to collapse the other’s spine" the fact that i can relate to this... as an older sibling whose little brother is growing taller than her, this is something i do with him. you nailed the sibling vibes w that one

"he “wins” in making Mark embrace his more Viltramite half. Mark socks him in the throat instead." SHFASDGHFEJHDG THAT'S SO FUNNY, "mark socks him in the throat instead" I AM LAUGHING OUT LOUD

also wasp biting mark in retaliation for not letting him do what he wants... THAT IS ALSO A SIBLING THING

i cannot count the amount of times my siblings have bitten me or licked my arm/hand

once mark manages to get wasp to stop actually trying to kill him instead of just threatening to do it ("i'm going to kill you" is smth i tell my friends regularly. theyre rude af so even if i am trying to b nice theyll jst answer w "nobody loves u", which. ouch. but also i did made them grab 20 cards at UNO so its fair) ppl start to believe the whole twin thing better

fist appearances: only children are worried. ppl w siblings aren't

second meeting: everyone is half worried and half scared (wasp is attempting murder again, mark can't keep him contained that long)

"He forgets the cameras and just CHOMPS" ppl reacting to them being Like That has got to be my fav thing to write about this au

...i have a fic idea. i have many but i might actually write this one after i'm done w the one im writing rn

it'a basically a social media fic, everyone (and i mean EVERYONE) reacting to those two

twitter would go wild w them

dinosaur

ngl this is funnier after reading the comics

rip dinosaurus or wtv your name is you would've loved this au

rip mark u would've loved to see a dinosaur punching wasp

also the idea of them having little inside jokes. htey dontt even WANT to haev them but smth jus, happens and its so funny adn now everytime they're reminded of it they laugh

or sometimes just one of them laughs and the other is like "god i hate you"

bc whatever happened made them look like an idiot

JUST IMAGINE,,,, THE INSIDE JOKES......

"-that hideous sense of Doing Right Thing." its like i said.... being nice is his worst nightmare

when we said he would have to be dragged kicking and screaming into redemption We Were Not Kidding

he starts his redemption arc and immediatly gets hit by.... oh my god, feelings?!?!?!

mark "hey being nice isn't all that bad actually" grayson VS mark "everything i have ever known is violence. my happiest memories are full of blood. when i think of my childhood, i only see red, and the one thing i remember is how much i liked it. dad helped me turn into this, but in the end, i did it myself. if he saw me now, he would be disappointed. would he try to kill me, too, if he learned what i am? what i might become?" grayson VS mark "sometimes i do want to punch ppl ngl" grayson VS mark "the last thing my dad taught me was how to be ruthless, how to stop holding back. the first, was how to be kind. i remember playing baseball with him. i remember sparring, and then fighting. he has seen what i am, and he killed me for it. he's seen what i am to become, and he left so he wouldn't have to face the consequences of what he's done. if he found me again, now, would he react the same? will he beat oliver half to death, like how he did with me?" grayson, FIGHT!!!!!!

actually mark being half like "i am kinda jealous that the only father this kid has ever known has been nothing but kind to him" is an idea i love

why was it him?

the worst (or best? he's holding onto his humanity so tightly, after all, and isn't loving the most human thing of all?) part is that he can't help but be glad that oliver won't have to go through the same pain he did

"this is me at my weakest" THISSS, GODDAMNIT.... THIS!!!!!!! THEY FIND EACH OTHER AND CAN ONLY SEE THE WORST VERSION OF THEMSELVES, I REPEAT, THEY FIND EACH OTHER AND CAN ONLY SEE THE WORST VERSION OF THEMSELVES!!!!!!!!!!

"? Bro is operating on hard mode," nah but fr

the reason the evil invincibles seem so fucking op compared to our mark is because they dont hold back

mark cherishes life. taking it away from someone, anyone, is wrong. it feels disgusting, it makes him feel dirty. the rest do not have that weakness

that's why they kick ass! that is also why they will always be alone

“how could you ever make me want to hate him?” Vs Mark “How could you do anything but?" OUGGGHHH FUCK. OHH THIS ONE HURT, DAMMIT

nolan getting wasp ice cream after his first kill tho. it's sweet but also so fucked up. anyway its nice to know he still loves his murderous son

nolan: i love my kind son also nolan: i love my asshole son

"they float against the ceiling like a balloon." i need a drawing of this. and a fic. i cant draw or write but ill do my best i just need to see this

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YOUR ART,,,,,, I LOVE YOUR ART SO MUCHHHHH IA LREAY SAID THIS BUT ITS TRUE

@thebrainrotsreal HEY SORRY FOR TAGGING(? PINGING(? U, ITS ABOUT THE AU. I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE THE OTHER POST THAT LONG LMAO

FLYING BEING NATURAL TO VILTRUMITES MY BELOVED

ASJDAJSD MARK TRYING TO GET AWAY W SLIGHTLY HOVERING(? IN A WAY THAT IS BARELY NOTICEABLE TO ANYONE BUT HE CAN'T DO IT WHILE HE WALKS BC HE JUST, DEFAULTS TO ACTUAL FLYING

mark and wasp are the same height, and they hate it almost as much as they hate each other. even if wasp is older than mark (read somewhere he could be 20, not sure tho), he'd still look 17 bc of the weird viltrumite aging thing

so basically they'll stay the same size for about 500 years. this is what nolan meant when he said mark would suffer...

ANYWAY. That thing abt them wanting to be taller than the other made me laugh and reminded me of a shadowpeach hc i posted on 2022(? LMAO

gonna use the same hc w them too

so. they're out as invincible (they still haven't decided on a name yet. wasp says he's stronger and therefore should be called invincible, but mark points out that he's the one in charge and also that this dimension is his. mark gets to keep it. they're still arguing about what to name wasp) ("why don't you just go by "vincible"?" "no.")

mark is talking to some gda agent or a cop or smth, when he notices that wasp (who is looking at the sky w the most bored expression he can muster, bc he genuinely doesn't understand why they have to talk to such inferior beings) seems to be just, a few milimeters taller than him (he may be shit at schoolwork, but if you hate someone enough you can notice the smallest details about them)

he, w/o stopping the conversation, answers to this by floating just a little higher, barely noticeable to the human eye

ofc, i said "human" eye

wasp notices. he flies higher

mark flies higher too

eventually he's screaming instead of talking bc of how far down the cop is

wasp laughs. now mark is screaming at him

they fight

ALSO WASP REFUSING TO STOP FLOATING AS A CIVILLAIN IS SO FUNNY AJDSHFASJ, IMAGINE THE AMOUNT OF TROUBLE HE'LL GET MARK INTO

PLS. THEM TRYING TO GNAW THEIR ARMS OFF BC THEY HATE BEING NEAR EACH OTHER SM ASJFHADJFH

most normal ppl r used to mark working alone as invincible. so since wasp really doesn't do interviews and he's usually too fast to see when he fights, no one really knows what his name even is

and everyone is used to invincible being. well. invincible. sure, the news say that when he's around this guy he gets a little meaner, but it can't be that bad!

it is that bad

wasp says smth mean n sarcastic. everyone expects invincible to answer w something equally sarcastic, but not as mean (maybe making fun of how his suit looks). they do not expect invincible to just fucking bite him after 8 of those comments

wasp keeps trying to kill This One Kid, who is either super brave or super stupid and won't stop asking him questions (they go from "what's your name?" to "what underwear do you have? do you even need underwear?" in a matter of seconds) for his weird school diary thingy

he can't get close, bc mark starts pulling the other way. besides, they're stuck together, and killing people would seem awfully annoying if it's with this guy

they can't punch each other, so wasp bites him. they bite each other a lot bc of the "no punching (or kicking)" thing

"Wasp throws a car at Mark which Mark instinctively swats away and then goes flying after it to prevent it from slamming into a building. Wasp cackles so hard it gets hit by a laser beam to the throat by some other bad guy." ASJDSAJDHDSJFAH YES THAT'S SO FUNNY

they mess w each other sm

it's funny bc they do the same things to annoy each other (wasp throwing a car at mark, mark hitting him with a tree, etc) , but lose their shit when the other does it to them

they're basically this:

mark, sleep deprived, flies straight into a lamp post

wasp laughs at him. he actually laughs so hard he runs into the same lamp post

there are a lot of compilations on youtube that is just them laughing at each other mid fight and running into things or being hit w stuff the other throws at them

they grow more wild every time

it goes from throwing cars, to throwing real life dinosaurs (mark doesn't want to talk about it) (wasp absolutely does)

"Cecil remarks Mark handled something well and he looks like Cecil just told him his entire family got slaughtered."

THISSS

"you did well today. hella efficient, quick and straight to the point. who taught you that?"

mark: D:

and also,

"oh, wow. you saved an entire family and their cat from a villain that wanted to turn them into zombies while mark was off fighting the bad guys? that's great!"

and wasp. cries

"oh no, no, you think I'm gonna help you?" THIS TISHTISHTSIHIST

this really feels like smth he'd say in canon. he'd say it w a smile, half-shocked half just pretending out of amusement

he'd laugh too

it's the same type of cocky tone of voice sinister mark/wasp used when teasing angstrom

"I gotta imagine if they tackle things separately, they are also allowing each other to do they want and like to do?" YEAH!!

it's hard 'cause wasp always wants to take the bad guys on alone, but mark also likes to fight (just not w the same brutality) and he doesn't want to be just a lifeguard

it takes wasp a while (a LONG while) to stop tackling mark when he's about to attack to get to the enemy himself, or to kick mark into the next country, etc etc etc

but eventually they settle on mark getting everyone to safety while wasp stalls the bad guy. then, after he's sure no one's here anymore, they both fight the villain together

or uh. they try. sometimes they'll start fighting each other too so it's less of a 1 v 2 fight and more of a... 1v1 V another 1 fight lol

"Mark's own reaction that truly confirms it to be true"

he gets the episode 8 levels of anger and anguish

HE'S JUST SO MAD

wasp is talking shit on tv and he just loses it

he immediatly flies off and tackles wasp into fucking space

i mean, they do say that actions say more than words, right?

mark is usually making the typical superhero noises when he's fighting, but now? he's just focusing all of his anger into This One Motherfucker

wasp loves it

it's a "see? i knew you had it in you!" type of moment

he's been longing for a real fight for a WHILE

they don't kill each other but it comes close

see, the things is. they are the same person. it's easy to start viewing them as two separate beings, but they're really. not

they're evenly matched in everything

this is why wasp likes fighting mark

this is why mark doesn't like fighting wasp (never ending battles are boring to him) ( he likes to win more than to fight. i mean it's not like he enjoys getting beat up)

we could dive deeper and start talking about the self-destructive tendency these two have to getting beat up. i mean, wasp's idea of a real, actually enjoyable fight is when the other is either able to beat him, or when he can kill ppl. and mark spends sm time out as invincible, neglecting his social life and mental health to the point he quits college, and he gets beat up a lot while doing it. so yeah--

self-destructive tendencies

"-having to confront he sees the exact thing in Wasp to a slightly different degree" i will ALWAYS love making them deal with the constant reminders that they're the same person

they deal w stuff in similar ways but to different degrees and realizing that gives them psychic damage like that magic squirrel in mca so they just preted they don't exist

unless it's to like. bring the other to their side

"you like fighting too. violence is in you, it's part of you. you're always covered in blood. all that's left, would be your hands" VS "you're me, and i'm you. we have similar thoughts, and that means i- y'know. but it means you are, too. you have a chance. and get that blood off you-- you need a shower"

COMICS!! AND!! WASP!!

yeah

HIM HAVING TO CONFRONT THE FACT THAT THE DESTROYING OF HIS WORLD HURT HIM TOO

because it is, in a way, his world too

he grew up in it. raised differently, yes, but still on earth

he was always different from the rest, getting his powers at an early age and all, but it's still the place he grew up in

not all the memories from it can be bad, right?

ANDDDDD... wasp reminding ppl of how strong he is regularly

"i could pull out your spine in a second." he says that out of nowhere, in a conversation that would've seemed normal to literally anyone else. he says it like it's nothing much. "i could kill you." you know he could, but you still wonder

would he? with how he is, with his inability to escape --- would he?

also he has fun when he watches the color drain from their faces

"Rudy has psychological profiles on all his friends he regularly updates like a diary, and he has one for himself too." NO BUT THIS IS SO IN CHARACTER FOR HIM

wasp talks shit about mark to anyone avaliable and rudy is no exception. even tho he finds him deeply annoying

honestly wasp is capable of doing p much anything to mess with mark

HE JST WOULD

the self-hatred is strong with this one too master!!! (sw ref again lol)

ASDJASJDSJAD THE BETTING POOL

wasp saying mark breathes annoyingly is such a sibling thing tho. "why are you chewing like that" "stop biting your stupid fork" "the way you cut your food is so weird" "your handwriting sucks, don't hold the pencil like that" etc etc etc

ANDD "he knew what wasp was going to say" DUDE YES??

he's talking and he gets. a feeling. and he turns to wasp, who is opening his mouth, and says "don't you fucking dare"

same w wasp. mark is annoying little shit too sometimes, he's also a teenager. so he infuriates wasp too

mark calls him a hypocrite

THE TWIN TERRORS OF HEROISM I CAN'T

imagine if ppl actually start calling them that tho

one day wasp calls mark to their? his? room and is like, "holy shit look at this" and shows him their? his computer

mark doesn't understand, until he sees the title and image of the video

"the twin terrors of heroism, terrorizing the terrorists once again" and its a picture of them kicking ass

"twin terrors of-- oh, come on, really?" "yes" "they couldnt have at least called us the invincibles or something?" "that'd be even worse" "...alright, i'll give you that" "..." "...." "they think we're like the fucking mauler twins" "oh you have got to be--"

ALSO this is so funny, them being like "mark/wasp" when they show up hurt or smth. everyone just learning to accept it. i mean what are they going to do. fight against two gods??

ha

AND YES YES YES DO TAG ME IN IT!!!! if i make anything about this au (posts, fics, drawings, u name it) i will tag u too

alcohol doesn't really affect viltrumites i think, but there has got to be something that gets them drunk

nolan could've taught wasp how to make it. if the ingredients are on earth, then he would maybe try to prepare it on mark's earth. mark shows up and sees that he's drunk. he goes "nope" and gets drunk too, maybe on accident maybe not. debbie shows up and sees her two superpowered sons sobbing over a bowl of popcorn

alternate version: gasoline gets them drunk

[psychosistr]

Meet Me Halfway- Chapter 4

Summary:  With his only friend gone after his defeat at the hands of the city's protector, Bushroot takes a walk through town to clear his head. On his walk, though, a certain lawn-ornament catches his eye.

Notes:  I probably found certain parts of this chapter funnier than others will, but I couldn't resist writing them, anyway x3

-First Chapter-

The heatwave finally started to break a few days after Liquidator’s defeat. With nothing better to do and in desperate need of fresh air that didn’t feel stale or suffocating, Bushroot spent the evening walking aimlessly through town.

Bushroot had gone back to the greenhouse every day since the “hard water crisis” (the term the media was using to describe the event wasn’t very imaginative), often staying until at least midnight in the hopes that Liquidator would show up just like before and they could go back to their afternoon routine of tending to the plants and talking about everything and nothing at all. Yet, every day, he left with the same disappointment of not seeing his friend.

It was strange, really: He’d spent so many years feeling lonely and unwanted. It was part of his everyday life- get up alone, go to work and have some minor social interactions that never really went anywhere, tend to his plants alone, then go home and spend the rest of his evening alone before getting up to do it all again in the morning. Then, out of the blue, a random supervillain breaks into his life and after only knowing him for two weeks Bushroot has trouble coping with the prospect of never seeing him again?

Maybe he really should see a shrink like his family always told him- there had to be something wrong with him to get that attached so quickly to someone so violent, so cruel, so conniving, so…

So charming…

So polite…

So eager to actually listen to him for a change…

Oh, who was he kidding? Even with his supervillainy ways, Liquidator was still one of the only people in Bushroot’s life who actually gave him some decent compassion and respect. Of course he’d miss the guy- he was one of Bushroot’s only friends since……actually, he was Bushroot’s ONLY friend since college, maybe even since high school now that he really thought about it. Gosh, he was so lonely…

With a heavy sigh, Bushroot kicked a pebble on the sidewalk and watched it roll across the street. He’d taken this walk to get some fresh air and try to get his mind off of how lonely he was, but all it did was serve to make him feel even more lonely and miserable than before. It didn’t help that he thought about his friend so often that literally everything was reminding him of the canine. That sprinkler spraying water over the lawn, those zinnias that were blooming like the ones in his greenhouse that he helped him water, that weird looking fountain statue shaped like Liquidator, that tree that-

Wait, WHAT?!

Bushroot had to do a double take to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him. Across the street, in the yard the pebble had landed in, was a lawn sprinkler system with a distinctive centerpiece- a concrete statue that looked EXACTLY like the liquid villain.

Everything about it was correct from the face to his usual body-proportions when he wasn’t connected to a larger mass of water. Not to mention there was the odd position the statue was in- angled as it was, it just looked like an art piece, but, if he imagined it being more level with the ground, it looked like the concrete had dried while the figure was walking. Its face even had a look of surprise on it!

It was too accurate to be just a statue.

“Liqui..?” The duck asked in a quiet whisper as he stared at the statue. Just as he was about to go across the street to examine it more closely, the front door of the house that the front yard belonged to opened and he quickly ducked down into some bushes to hide. “!!”

“Come on, dad!” A red-haired duckling yelled as she ran out into the yard with a duffel bag on her shoulder and a hockey stick in her hand. “We’re gonna be late for the new-players party!”

“Not if SOMEBODY stops eating brownies for five minutes and gets out here!” An older duck who looked to be about the same age as Bushroot said while walking out of the house as well and helping the girl load her stuff into the car parked in their driveway, pausing only briefly to turn off the water in his sprinkler system. “Launchpad, let’s GO!!” He yelled back towards the house.

“Comin’, DW!” A slightly younger and much larger duck shouted while running out of the house. He shoved a brownie into his mouth while quickly closing the door behind him, soon getting into the driver’s seat of the car and starting it up. “Don’t worry, Gos- we’ll be there in no-time flat!”

“We’d better!” The duckling said while grinning wickedly. “No newbies are allowed on MY team until they’ve survived their first Gosalyn Mallard surprise practice drill!”

“Can you at least wait until AFTER they get their gear on this time? I’d like to get to the first game of the season WITHOUT getting yelled at by some kid’s angry PTA-mom in the hospital..” The oldest duck said with a shake of his head and an eye roll that spoke of many hospital trips and apology letters.

Once the small group was buckled in, the car drove off down the street at a speed that was honestly frightening to watch.

Bushroot looked at the house after the car was out of sight- there were no lights on, so everyone who lived there was probably already gone…

It was getting late, so everyone else in the neighborhood was already gone or just sitting down to dinner, meaning there was no one else around…

He could probably-

No, no, that would be wrong! It would be stealing!

……

Wait, would it really be stealing since it was a living person? Wouldn’t that make it more like kidnapping? Also, was it really kidnapping if you were taking someone from a place they most likely didn’t actually WANT to be and freeing them? Wasn’t that more like RESCUING??

Okay, maybe THAT part wasn’t so bad, but, even still, it’s not like he had a way to carry a solid concrete statue all the way back to his apartment-

And then the flat-bed tow-truck pulled up in front of one of the houses next to the property that Bushroot was hiding on. The driver got out, so distracted with trying to open his lunchbox and get out some donuts that he didn’t even notice he’d dropped the keys on the sidewalk on his way into the house.

……

So, this was really happening, huh?

……

The universe just conveniently gave him everything he needed to grab the statue and get out of there?

……………

Well, who was he to argue with the universe?

Acting quickly, Bushroot exited his leafy camouflage and grabbed the keys. It took some time to adjust the driver’s seat, get the truck pulled around to the other side of the road, and figure out how to work the levers enough to lower the flat-bed close enough to the ground that he wouldn’t have to lift the statue to get it on the truck.

Once he had the truck’s bed low enough, he grabbed the chains connected to the winch and tied them off around Liquidator’s stone body- hoping that he wouldn’t accidentally break anything vital. (Then again, he WAS made of water, so he should be fine, right?)

Bushroot hesitated for a moment with his hand on the winch’s lever.

Once he did this, there’d be no going back: He’d have to steal the truck to get Liquidator back to his apartment. If he got caught, he’d be charged with grand-theft auto at best and aiding a known criminal at worst. In either scenario, he’d be serving some major jail time.

Could he really go through with this..?

“……” He almost took his hand off of the lever, but, when he looked back over to Liquidator’s face frozen in a look of surprise and shock, he felt something stab him in the heart. “Don’t worry, Liqui- I’ll get you out of here.” Bushroot said quietly to himself more than to the statue before activating the winch.

It made a lot of noise as it pulled on the statue and began to separate it from its base and the pipes that had been run up into it. It lasted for a few agonizingly long moments until, with a final loud “clang”, the statue was freed from its moorings and pulled up onto the bed of the truck.

The noise, unfortunately, caused many of the neighbors to finally notice what was going on and start gathering at the windows and doors to see what was happening- including the actual owner of the truck who was NOT too happy to see his vehicle being used by someone else.

Bushroot practically dove into the driver’s seat, scrambling to get the door closed and locked behind him before speeding off down the street. He kept his head down as low as possible until he was far away from the neighborhood and certain that no one had followed him.

As he drove to his apartment, Bushroot swallowed down the guilt he felt over stealing the truck and damaging someone else’s property (though it HAD been a person who was essentially being held against his will), and focused on forming a plan to separate Liquidator from his concrete prison. He’d figure everything out eventually once his heart stopped pounding so loudly that he couldn’t hear himself think.

Strangely enough, the beating of his heart didn’t feel like it was entirely from panic. He briefly wondered if he should be worried about that…

<-Previous Chapter Next Chapter->

End Notes:  One plot-hole I don't see addressed that often is how Darkwing just left Liquidator's statue ON HIS LAWN. Logically, someone should've recognized it or Liquidator would have an idea of where Darkwing lived/who he was connected to since he was kept there for so long. Oh well, guess it's the sort of thing that helps fic writers out later xD

[snowflake-of-destruction]

vanikai!!

1. How do much do I ship it?: Never heard of it/ Notp / Dislike / used to ship / maybe / ship it / aww / otp / IS IT CANON YET

Fun fact: I started out as maybe and moved to the ship category while writing 

2. What non sexual activities do they like to do together?

Grass is Greener Verse: 

Theater, as shocking as it is that they can fixate on something where the eyes aren't on either of them. Well, there is the pre-show ritual of Kairi talking about how well she would have done as a stage actress. Vanitas more often takes a supportive rather than sarcastic response to this, and tells her she should go to some open auditions. It's far from too late. She's young, hot, and talented (He presumes the last one, but he'd never bet the opposite...and after he sees the one movie she did and some of the commercials...he'll just keep his mouth shut on talented). Sometimes, she'll beam, call him right, and make plans she doesn't follow through on. Sometimes she's noncommittal. Sometimes she'll glare at him, deciding he's just trying to end conversation or mock that she is all talk. Post-show there's also talk--this time from both of them--about how they could have done better in certain roles, which is a couples bonding activity all on its own. HOWEVER, these types of fantasies are not why they love plays. They think is an engrossing form of storytelling, that make worlds come to life and put you in them more than movies or tv. Also, they are simply dramatic nerds at heart.

They also play tennis. Primarily doubles, though you would be foolish to play against them, but they enjoy competing with each other too.

Rock climbing, but at an indoor rock gym. Anyone who asks them if they are training for something/ever planning a trip receives incredibly incredulous looks and scoffing. Not because of the potential danger, because of the very idea of them out in the wilderness...though sometimes Kairi will counter this by mentioning that one summer she worked for her father's, now Axel's, landscaping business. That was getting dirty in nature. Vanitas's response to this is not for this headcanon space

A more canon-verse approach (what do you mean Vanitas not joining the guardians of light post-kh3 is not canon?): There is a lot of sparring. Vanitas helps Kairi advance her keyblade training and just plain get out some of the anger in the grief of losing Sora. Van doesn't go easy and Kairi likes that. Kairi helps Vanitas with any gaps in education without talking down, pitying or even mentioning his strange upbringing, or, the worst, comparing him to Roxas or Xion (because he has identity issues too). I'm not even talking traditional education, though that too if he wants, but education on social situations...which he's not a complete idiot about. He's actually really good at reading people. He just needs a little guidance on what way to use the info, because he only has like five moves and not every situation calls for "taunt" or "threaten loved one". Kairi makes him a much better manipulator. Thanks Kairi. There's also a lot of snuggling, because I say so, that's why. I just see them both as a bit yearning for physical reassurance in their lonely spells, and also the least likely to say it for their own different reasons, so they read it in each other and  just give each other what they need but won't ask for.

Read More before this gets too long

3. Who does chores around the house?

Grass is Greener: Neither, as much as it can be helped. It's a stand off about most of the regular chores, and periodically they have a cleaning service come through that is more thorough than either of them are. More often than not, Kairi is the one that "breaks" over keeping the kitchen clean, and Vanitas about cleaning bathrooms and straightening living areas. Vanitas is very neat as a habit, and Kairi likes her surroundings to show a little bit of how she likes chaos--she just is grossed out by dirty dishes, grease stains, and food crumbs. Cooking is a bit of a fifty-fifty with both preferring quickly assembled meals. Laundry is taken down to nothing-to-wear levels, and then it's whoever needs something first. Though sometimes this all goes out the windows, and Kairi goes through "Look, I'm a fifties housewife" sprints where suddenly everything's spotless and she's cooked a three course dinner and did it all in a cocktail dress because she didn't realize you're supposed to change into the dress after. 

Kinda-canon: Vanitas. He has a lot of pent up emotions and sometimes you have got to stress clean or cook. Kairi would help, but the arrangement of Vanitas doing the lion's share and it seeming to help him definitely works for the self-described lazy bum.

4. Who’s the better cook?

Grass is Greener: Vanitas. Kairi is a bit careless following recipes and doesn't have the innate "cooking sense" in regard to estimating amounts, flavors, heat, or time to freestyle. Vanitas, when he does cook, tends to get really serious about it even though he prefers the simple to assemble, like I said in the last answer.

Kinda Canon: Kairi. Vanitas is slow to adjust from the “food is only fuel not pleasure” mindset and Kairi starts out with a base of her adoptive parents having taught her some things. Vanitas has a sharp learning curve though, bullying Little Chef into helping him (because he's not going to lose) and not realizing that the bullying is what makes Little Chef more reluctant and ensures Remy doesn't teach him all the secrets he does to others.  Anyone can cook, but if you're mean you are taught to cook less well. Once Kairi gets Little Chef tutelage, it's all over.

5. Who’s the funniest drunk?

Grass is Greener: Both and neither in a way. They both have a very high tolerance. They tend to act out more on purpose out of the excuse than act out because of a truly altered state. Alcohol isn't magic. It just lowers inhibitions and neither has those to begin with. If I had to choose though, Kairi is a funnier drunk, because Vanitas's mean streak becomes more developed the drunker he is, whereas Kairi's mean streak, when she chooses to have one, is more practiced and purposeful cultivation instead of a natural harshness.

Kinda Canon: Vanitas. He is not prepared, and once he loses his filter everything spills out, and it's a lot less ugly than some people expected. Kairi just gets giggly and slightly louder, but otherwise doesn't change.

6. Do they have kids?

Grass is Greener: :) :D  Listen. Listen. If Shaky was the one who carelessly put "I don't think it fits me the way it used to" on the Vanikai picture she drew. SUPPOSEDLY this was done for cleavage and for the "help you take it off" joke but I know a dangled plotline when I see it. 

Kinda Canon: That partially depends on the state of the worlds and how many other keybearers there are when they are older. Even in a stable universe, I don't see them having kids young and it being a long discussion of whether they want kids at all, not the least because of the implications of Vanitas's powers and whether they are only his or would be passed down--what could happen to an infant that could summon Unversed and not know how to retract them even if they were loyal especially if it would be hurt by them being vanquished. I see them adopting orphans from other worlds and saying fuck world order more than having kids naturally. 

7. Do they have any traditions?

Grass is Greener: Annual trip to Vegas to recreate the way they met under new created identities.

Kinda Canon:  Vanitas calls every tradition he's introduced to stupid without fail. Vanitas also gets VERY into every holiday, and Kairi is all too happy to indulge. Then, he starts nudging her about teaching him more dumb holidays. Their tradition becomes ALL THE TRADITIONS. They celebrate holidays from every world and from every religion if there's a way to do it respectfully--and if it's not appropriate to participate, then they just learn about it as much as they are permitted--and then they look up and celebrate obscure or "made up" things like Leave a Zucchini on a Neighbor's Porch Day.

8. What do they fight about?

Grass is Greener:  What you would expect. 

Housework. 

Why do you take criticism like a personal attack?

What do you do all day? versus Why are you never home? 

Were you flirting with the waiter? 

Did you even want the baby? Was it a relief when I lost it?

Kind of Canon: Imagine Kairi saying in the same tone as Belle in Disney's Beauty and the Beast "Well you should learn to control your temper!"

No, really, it's mainly about Vanitas being "mean" to people...and then sometimes it's about Kairi doing the same and then blaming him as a bad influence.

9. What would they do if they found their paring tag on tumblr? (If they have one)

Grass is Greener: The flippant answer is that they are really confused about this whole Disney crossover with weird swords thing, and why they are teenagers in so many of these pictures. Don't even get them started on the skirt over the muscle suit paired with the motorcycle helmet Vanitas sees himself put in. When he wears a skirt he has a lot better style, especially if Kairi helps put together the outfit.

But let's take this in a different way. That one bad movie Kairi did is actually gaining a small cult following now years after its release. Someone does a "What Happened to Kairi Emberson? The Answer Will Shock You!" clickbait. The answer...is not shocking but enough people see a photo of Kairi, fine as ever, now Kairi White and looking so happy with Vanitas, and the pair get an objectively creepy because the next few pictures are pulled from social media they don't lock, but well intentioned few people finding and posting more cute pictures of the,  and they become a sparse tag and one that is half joking, but a RPS all the same. Kairi pretends to hate this, but is not so secretly really flattered. Vanitas genuinely hates it.

Kinda-canon:  Kairi loves it. Vanitas is fascinated despite himself. Everyone else is disappointed because they expected flustered denials or anger at those that portray them wrong, but Van and Kairi both just think it's cool.

10. Who cried at the end of Marley and me?

Grass is Greener: Neither. They roasted it for filth. They cried about it much later. Vanitas in the shower, and Kairi the next day when she was over at Xion's, saw her dog Elmo, and it all busted loose.

Kinda Canon: Vanitas. Cue a discussion about how movies work, how they are not real, and Vanitas snapping that he knows that until there are now multiple types of Unversed to take care of. Kairi gently cuddles both her man and the Unversed until equilibrium returns.

11. Who always wins at Mario kart?

Kairi in all universes. Vanitas doesn't care in GiG, but in canon there is a shout of "Rematch and this time it counts!" despite it being the 100th rematch

12. One thing I like about this ship?

That they have potential to understand each other more than people who technically know them better, or at least the concept of being seen a certain way and having a different "certain way" that everyone thinks it would be better if they grew toward instead of just being allowed to be. Princess of Heart and Agent of Darkness aren't really so different after all.

13. One thing I don’t like about the ship?

When it's clear that it's a fill in for people who want Soriku but can't think of anyone but Sora for Kairi, and so pick "other Sora." There's not anything wrong with that outright, and this isn't me annoyed with pair the spares (though that can rub wrong if it is handled wrong or I'm in a mood to make a point about how not everyone needs a romantic relationship), but annoyed with the reduction of Vanitas to "edgy Sora"

14. The song I would say fits them?

Grass is Greener:

Sibella, and I'll quote a verse and a half because clearly this isn't already long enough.

"You are vain and you are heartless and yet

I can feel in you a shade of sadness

That's barely detectable

That I still want you at all

I may live to regret

You're deceitful

You're delectable

You see the fate of a man

Who has had the misfortune

To spend his life caught in your sway

I see Sibella

My Sibella

And I like her that way"

It works both ways. Change whatever pronouns you want.

Kind of Canon: I...don't know. I can't think off the top of my head. 

15. Another headcanon about the paring? (Free space)

Grass is Greener: Even though they think they met in Vegas, they had crossed paths before and probably more than once. I don't have specific headcanons (yet), but this may be something if I ever write the other 20 bazillion Grass is Greener scenes for various characters and relationships that I want to do first.

Kind of Canon:  Kairi makes her own version of the suit and borrows Vanitas's helmet sometimes to do things she would never "get away with" as herself. Vanitas blesses this, helps her with the suit, and hands over the helmet after kissing the visor for luck. He also exposes her as a fake Vanitas by showing up at the worst time on purpose.

[saramunoz-mt]

Internet = Junk food?

Are we addicted to our phones?

Most certainly. I can’t speak for everyone, but I know that to some extent you can consider my reliance to my phone an addiction. According to the textbook, you qualify as an internet addict if you spend 40 to 80 hours per week online, with individual sessions as long as 20 hours. Thanks to the “Screen time” setting on iPhones, I’m able to see that last week I spent 29 hours of screen time, so to the textbooks definition I don’t qualify. But, something that I didn’t take account of when looking at my screen time was the amount of time I spend on my laptop and even worse- the time I spend on both my laptop and phone, double the exposure. 

The textbook also expands on how internet usage effects our brains. The study showed a change in the subjects brains when they were exposed to more/less internet. This digital stimulation is similar to that of the drive for food and sex. Which is of no surprise to me. Although somewhat unrelated, today I actually viewed a movie on Netflix called Forks Over Knives. It’s a documentary that shows the benefits of a plant based diet to people’s diet, specifically those that have been diagnosed with a certain illness and how the diet can help reverse it. And after watching this I made a connection to fast food and internet/social media usage. Although at first I thought it was a weird connection, when I think about it, it doesn’t seem that weird because I imagine someone pigging out with a burger and large fries while binge watching a show. 

Anyways, the question is posed “Why do these concentrated foods that are so harmful to us give us so much pleasure?” Dr. Lisle explains that it is because of something called the “Motivational Triad” which is a trio of biological mechanisms that nature has designed into every creature in order to survive and reproduce. The first being pleasure seeking (food and sex) which is what first brought me to relate fast food and the internet, the second, unrelated to my comparison, but in case you were dying to know, is avoiding pain. And lastly, the third is “doing everything with the least amount of effort” which I think is similar to the fraction of selection. The idea of expectation of reward over effort required. You get the gist, I hope. 

Comparing the internet to junk food might suggest I may think the internet is a bad thing, which could totally be debatable, but “everything in moderation” can be applied to both internet usage and eating junk food. 

On another note:

If you’ve noticed the John Mulaney theme so far, I wanted to include part of his special that is kind of relevant to this and if you think it’s not then I hope you at least get a laugh out of it. This is part of the script from John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous at Radio City, I couldn’t find a clip of the video with this part, but I assure you that it is much funnier watching him perform than just reading it to yourself. 

“Famous people are often rude because they’re used to getting things really quickly. I bet a lot of us are pretty polite. But as soon as we get things quickly, we start to get ruder and ruder. Look at technology, it’s faster than ever and we’re ruder than ever. People walk around on the phone now, “Hello? You still there? Lost him.” And that’s it. No follow-through with that guy. Fifty years ago, if you were on the telephone with your friend and suddenly the line just went dead, that meant your friend was murdered. The phone used to be a big deal. It was a long, polite process. Back in the 1940s, the phone was like a wood box… with a thing on it. I don’t know. It had its own room. You’d go, “That’s the phone’s room!” And it was expensive. You’d wait all week to make your call. “It’s almost Tuesday!” And then you’d take the cup on the string or whatever… There weren’t even numbers. You’d just go, “Hello? Anyone? [yells] Anyone in the world?” Then you’d go, “Operator, ring me Neptune 5-117.” And the operator was a real person that you had to be nice to. She’d be like, “One moment, please. I’m putting wires into a board filled with holes to move the voices around, ’cause it is the ’40s.” And it took like 90 minutes. Now people just drive around screaming at their phones like… -Call home! -“Calling the mobile for Tom.” Not fucking Tom! [imitating Mick Jagger] Not funny! [audience laughing]”

[yoon-kooks]

Witch Hazel- Pt.2

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: FanficWriter!Jungkook, Idol!Reader, College!AU, Angst, Fluff

Summary: There are two students in your art class with a secret: you and the quiet Jeon Jungkook. You’re a problematic idol singer, infamous for your ice cold reputation and perpetual resting bitch face; he’s the artist and author behind the viral comic series based on a certain ice queen idol. After a blowup of destructive rumors, lost motivation and inevitable solitude, you stumble upon Jungkook’s comic and find a new and unexpected light.

Word Count: 3.6k

Parts: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // ?

A/N: yikes i haven’t updated this in super long aaaaaaaaa also happy birthday to the nuttiest kid in all the land, jeon jungkook :-) 

“Hey have you read Witch Hazel yet?”

“Of course I have… Who hasn’t?”

“True, it really went viral after Snow made that tweet, huh.”

“I can’t believe how much power that bitch has…”

“Yeah but that jk.seagull boy is super talented regardless.”

“It’s just a shame he wastes his talent on Snow of all people.”

“Right? Like, can you imagine if he wrote something about Park Jimin?? It’d be even more popular than Witch Hazel will ever b-”

The gossip dissipates as you walk into the art room, as if your classmates know you’re the idol they’ve been shit talking. But of course, that isn’t the case. It’s simply your chilling aura that halts any conversation for a brief moment.

You set your guitar case down and take your usual seat at the same table as the only two people who don’t seem to mind your presence.

“Y/N, did you hear? Jungkook became an overnight sensation,” Taehyung whispers to you as he points at the black mass that’s slumped over the table.

“Are you trying to tell me he’s the one who wrote the infamous Witch Hazel?” you yawn, unamused. But out of curiosity you look over to the boy who’s all bundled up under his hood with his head resting against the table, trying to catch up on as much sleep as possible before class begins. There’s no way he could write a fanfic comic about you.

“What? No! No, no, no, no,” Taehyung laughs and pulls out his phone to show you the same tabloid you’d seen the other day—the one that claimed Snow and Jimin were secretly dating. He points to the ominous hooded figure in the background of the photos. “Someone pointed him out in the midst of the whole Snow-Jimin chaos and now he’s a Twitter meme.”

“What kind of meme…?” You only ask because Jungkook does give off major meme vibes. Maybe it’s the way he pairs his round Harry Potter glasses and baggy hoodie with the tiny silver gauges in his ear and the ripped jeans that hug his thighs. He’s like some weeby hipster fusion, and you aren’t quite sure how to feel about that.

You don’t know what you were actually expecting, but it does feel a little shitty when you find out the meme in question features Jungkook as a shocked grim reaper who accidentally kills Snow’s career. Suddenly, you remember why you had chosen to stay away from social media.

“Funny, right?” Taehyung pats his sleeping friend’s broad back to wake him up. “But what’s even funnier is the fact that the cold-hearted Y/N reads fanfic, too??” Jungkook’s head pops up and tilts when he spots you sitting at their table. Oh no. The weeb thinks you’re one of them.

“I don't really read fanfic, okay? It’s just that Witch Hazel happened to be all over the internet, so I was curious.” You wave your hands in defense, praying they don’t get the wrong idea.

“Did you like it?” It’s literally the first fucking time you recall Jungkook ever speaking to you. His voice is much softer towards you than when he chatters with Taehyung, and there’s a genuine curiosity and innocence in his eyes.

“It was fine.” It’s not like you can just say no to those big doe eyes. “I just can’t believe there are people out there who really see Snow as their muse…” And what a relief it is to know.

Jungkook nods, although it seems like he’d say more if he wasn’t so shy. You watch as he pulls out two pages from his sketchbook, one with a realistic sketch of Taehyung’s face, and the other a comic version of a nerdy Jungkook.

“Thanks, friend.” Taehyung slides the beautiful portrait of himself over to the desk space in front of him and angles it towards you. “Stunning, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, too bad you didn't draw it yourself, you snake,” you shake your head. Despite all the hardwork Jungkook put into the portrait, you can’t help but feel bothered by the fact that his friend almost fucked him over with their little deal.

“Aww, don’t be so bitter, Y/N. I’m sure Jungkook would be willing to draw you too if you gave him something in return~” Taehyung winks at you, and as much as you’d love to tell him off, you can’t.

“Shut up, Tae-”

“I don't need his help,” you cut Jungkook off, pulling out your own self-portrait. Somehow it looks a lot uglier now than when you had first finished it. But whatever. At least it’s your own work, your own art. “I don’t need anyone’s help.”

Both Taehyung and Jungkook stare at your art, not really knowing what to say. The more you look at it yourself, the more you see that it doesn’t resemble you.

“Hey it kind of looks like Sn-”

“Alright everyone, it’s time for class to begin.” You’re thankful that your professor cut Taehyung off before his loud mouth said too much. You can’t believe your idiot self accidentally drew your portrait as a glammed-up Snow with her beautiful blue eyes rather than as a bland college kid Y/N with no shits to give. “Let’s start by taking a look at all of our self-portraits.”

You watch as your classmates take out their drawings, some better than others, but none quite as terrible as your own. You suppose you shouldn’t feel bad, considering you didn’t enter a school of the arts with the intentions of becoming an artist with paints and a sketchbook like most of your drawing class did. You entered school with the intentions of becoming an artist with your guitar and notebook. And the only reason why you made the decision to include this unrelated class on your schedule was to escape your failures as the musician you wished to be.

“Taehyung, since you love to talk, why don’t you start us off by introducing your piece? And then we’ll just go around the classroom one-by-one.” Your professor gestures to Jungkook’s drawing of Taehyung’s face. Great. The last thing you want to do is show off your ugly Snow portrait to an entire room of people you don’t really feel close to. If any of them find out you’re an idol, you’ll have to quit school. That was the agreement you made with Seokjin after he encouraged you to give school a chance.

“Well, I’d like to think my portrait is pretty straightforward. My approach was to be as realistic as possible while accentuating my most defining features such as my long eyelashes and beauty marks. And I did this by…” Taehyung goes on and on in such detail about the portrait that he didn’t even draw. It’s actually quite impressive. You envy his ability to speak with such confidence and charisma in a way that makes everyone believe his shitty art skills could produce something so beautiful. He knows how to make everyone his friend.

“Can you believe Taehyung’s that talented at drawing despite being a photography major?” You hear two girls whispering amongst themselves. “He’s incredible.”

Next is Jungkook. You snicker a bit at his drawing because it’s not exactly what you’d expect from the art genius of the class. While he had made Taehyung’s portrait super realistic, his own portrait looks like a bespectacled nerd that came straight out of a manga. Weeb. The thing that stands out most is his big nose. But you find it kind of cute.

“I just drew myself in comic form because that’s what I was most comfortable with,” he says, staring down at his sketch. You can tell he kind of trolled by overemphasizing with some dynamic lines for a more dramatic effect on his meme face.

“Amazing job as always, Jungkook,” your professor gives the boy a thumbs up in approval and elaborates further on the refined techniques he incorporated into the assignment. Jungkook only nods in response to the nice feedback. You appreciate how humble he is despite the professional level of his art. In the corner of your eye, however, you swear you see the same pair of Taehyung fangirls roll their eyes.

Finally it’s your turn. It’s unfortunate that you have to show your shitty artwork right after Jungkook’s two masterpieces, but it could be worse. After all, this wouldn’t be the first time your artistic ability has been criticized and compared with others. As an idol, you deal with that all the time.

“My self-portrait doesn’t look like me because it’s like a mask that superheroes wear to conceal their identities. So people don’t know what’s really hiding beneath the surface.” You don’t mean to darken the mood, but that’s the best way to put it without explicitly saying you have another identity as Snow. No one in your class makes a comment, but you suppose that’s expected. They wouldn't understand.

“And the blue eyes?” You wish your professor wouldn’t prompt you with more questions. Why couldn't she just say you did a good job and move on like she did with everyone else? You feel singled-out.

“I think they’re prettier than my real eyes.” You don’t want to tell everyone you’re a cold-hearted ice queen, but you aren’t completely lying either. Back when you first entered Polar Entertainment, you remember thinking it’d be cute to wear those icy blue contacts for your audition. And you suppose it paid off because you were told you were beautiful with a beautiful voice, perfectly suited to be an idol. But an idol was never what you wanted to be. Beauty wasn’t what you wanted to be remembered by, but that seems to be the only thing people ever praise Snow for.

“So your portrait is more of a reflection of who you’d like to be?” Wrong. Absolutely wrong.

“Yeah,” you say, in hopes that your professor will move on to pestering the next person. Thankfully, she does.

After wasting the majority of class on showcasing everyone’s artwork, your professor announces that there’s a “phase two” in the portrait unit. The new assignment is basically to draw yourself again, “but with the interpretation and direction from two of your classmates.” Your professor also notes that this group project requires a lot of work and interaction outside of class, and that you should get to know your groupmates really well in order to succeed in this assignment. Fantastic. You hate group projects.

You remember the horror stories from high school of being that one kid who couldn’t find a group, or having incompetent groupmates who let you down. You’d much prefer to do the work all on your own. Especially when you know your class has some pretty incompetent students of its own, namely Kim Taehyung. You’d hate to be stuck with that guy.

“Psst, Jungkook, Y/N. Wanna be in a group together?” No, you do not want to be in a group with Taehyung. However, you’re in no position to turn down his offer. Because you’re sure everyone else in your class wouldn’t appreciate having you on their team. That's just the way things are.

“Sure,” you say. Jungkook nods after you. Perhaps working with Jungkook will outweigh being dragged down by a slacker like Taehyung.

“Great, should we hangout after class today? Today’s like the one time I don’t have a date planned.” Taehyung flips through the filled calendar on his phone before handing his phone over for you to give him your number. After doing so, you check your own phone for a text from the boy with his number, but instead you find a message from your boss.

2:46PM monster lady👹 “Snow-- Seokjin informed me that you’ve requested to take time off from work. In light of this and the current situation regarding Park Jimin, please drop by my office today so we can have an open discussion about the best option for you moving forward.”

“I can’t, I have somewhere to go after class. Sorry guys.” You only feel bad because you’re the one holding them back.

“Where do you have to go? Is it a date?” Taehyung asks. Why does this guy only ever think about dates?

“No…” you answer, praying he’ll stop being so nosy.

“Then what-”

“Actually, I’m busy today too,” Jungkook adds before the other boy can say anything else. “I have to do a bunch of drawings for my animation class.”

“Excuses, excuses,” Taehyung shakes his head at you and Jungkook, as if he’s the responsible one in the group. “How did I get stuck with the two most antisocial people in the class?”

“You’re the one who asked us,” is what you want to say, but Jungkook says it for you.

“Fine, fine,” the other boy gives in because he knows he’ll fail the class without his buddy. “I’ll go get laid tonight, I guess.”

You nod, packing your things into bag and picking up your guitar. Before you leave, you realize you forgot something.

“Can I get your number too?” You point your guitar case in Jungkook’s direction. Flustered, he feels around his entire hoodie for his phone, only to remember it’s in the ass pocket of those tight jeans. He looks a bit hesitant about swapping phones with you, and you think it’s probably because he’s never gotten a girl’s number before.

But of course, it’s actually because he’s embarrassed by his lockscreen, a bright photo of Snow with a soft yellow sundress and her guitar. You remember you’d been excited for that photoshoot because you didn’t have to do any of the usual pin-up modeling that your company loves to milk out of you. But it’ll forever leave a bitter taste in your mouth because of the guitar. It was merely a prop, and nothing more.

You don’t say anything as you input your number into his phone, but you’ll never understand his infatuation with an idol as one-dimensional as Snow. Especially when he hasn’t even met her.

-

As you walk down the halls of your company’s building, you try not to get your hopes up. Sure, your boss might’ve sent you a friendly little text about having an “open discussion” with you, but you know she probably already has her mind made up on whatever’ll be best for herself and her company.

Knock. “Come in,” an authoritative voice calls out from the other side of the door. A middle-aged lady with round reading glasses and an edgy A-line bob sits at her desk, hands clasped together, when you step into her office. Yang Sooyoung, CEO of Polar Entertainment, the woman you’ve despised for the majority of your idol career, gestures for you to take the seat in front of her. “How are you today, Snow?”

“Good,” you lie. She doesn’t really give a shit about your well-being anyway, so why bother humoring her.

“That’s good,” she nods. “Were you busy earlier?” You know she’s only asking you this because she’s ticked off that you didn’t come sooner.

“I was just running some errands on my day off.” She isn’t aware that you attend school, and you’d like to keep it that way.

“Oh, I see. But please do try to make this your priority, just as we make you ours.”

“Of course.”

“That being said, we believe it’s best for you to apologize for the recent incident with Park Jimin. After we release a statement, you’ll be able to enjoy your time away from idol work, free of stress.”

“What exactly do you want me to apologize for?” You try your best not to come off sounding too annoyed, but you were never good at acting. Or being fake.

“For being too friendly with the boy, and as a result, causing a misunderstanding.” For being too friendly with a boy? All you recall doing was talking to Jimin for five minutes max.

“I need to apologize for that?”

“Yes,” she nods, completely serious. “I know you shouldn’t have to apologize, but it’s the most efficient way of handling the situation. I spoke to a representative from Bloom Entertainment, and they’ve already dealt with Jimin’s side.”

“I’ll clarify what happened in order to clear up any misunderstanding,” you say. “But I’m still not going to say sorry when I did nothing wrong.”

Your boss raises her pointy eyebrows and shakes her head. “Snow, for the sake of damage control, please just apologize. It doesn’t matter if it’s genuine or not. We just need to handle things professionally here.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re genuine. Just hearing those words infuriates you. “I can’t pretend like I’m obligated to apologize all the time just because I’m an idol with flaws. I don’t owe society anything.”

“But you do owe me and my company something, don’t you think? Who gave you the opportunity to become an idol in the first place? Me. So if you can’t suck it up and apologize to preserve my company’s reputation, then don’t call yourself an idol.”

What you want to do is quit and let your shitty boss rot with her company. The only reason her company has prospered is because of you—not the other way around. Ever since becoming an idol, you’ve felt more dead than alive. Snow, the fabricated idol, may be prospering. But Y/N, the actual girl behind Snow’s mask, is fading.

At the same time, you know you can’t quit. Not for the sake of the company, nor for the sake of money and fame, but for the sake of becoming someone’s hero, anyone’s hero. If you could achieve that goal through other means, you would. But at this rate, being the idol you hate is all you can do to make people happy. At least for now.

So you make your apology and let PR handle the rest. In exchange, you’re given a maximum of half a year to get your shit together before your contract expires.

-

That night, you lay sprawled out on your bed in your pink penguin pajamas. Rather than filling your mind with the toxicity you’ve been dealing with for the past few days, you try to let it go for now. Despite the frustrating talk you had with your boss, reality is sinking in that you have a nice long break ahead. You can’t remember the last time you’ve felt so relieved. Free.

You even made a promise to yourself that you’d steer far, far away from anything Snow or idol-related for the next few weeks. And there are only two exceptions you’ll make.

The first exception is your manager. As your one and only friend, you do rely on Seokjin more than you’d like to admit. Because not only does he keep you from doing irrational things as an idol, he also keeps you company on your days off from work and school. The two of you get along quite well, and he’s the only person you can be yourself around. He’s like your life boat—without him, you surely would’ve sunk long ago.

The second exception is Witch Hazel. And as soon as you curl up into your bed, you go to the jk.seagull blog, now bookmarked on your phone’s browser. He has several short posts added to his blog since the last time you checked.

“asdfghjkl;;;;”

“sHE!!!”

“i cant believe snow saw witch hazel?? and even tweeted about it??”

“guys this makes me so happy :((((”

“brb crying”

“ok im back but holy fuck wow”

“anyway thank you guys so much for showing this comic a lot of love and support :(((”

“ill try my best to make pt.2 even better! i might be a little busy with art school, but please anticipate another update soon!”

He’s an art student like you. He’s enthusiastic about sharing his art with others, like the way you feel when releasing a new album. He’s genuinely grateful for the support from his audience, like the way you feel at the end of every concert. But he does it all behind a mask, just like you.

Just as you’re about to close your browser and text Seokjin about spending the night, a new post pops up on jk.seagull’s blog.

“lmao heres a sneak peek of pt.2 that no one asked for~”

Beneath the caption is a sketch of little Snow trying to make friends with a bunny boy character, but she fails because she’s too much of a stubborn tsundere. You assume this new bunny character must be a fellow superhero of some sort, a possible ally or maybe even a romantic interest. Either way, you find it both cute and hilarious. Snow could never have a romantic interest in real life, but you suppose it’s nice to dream. At the same time, you laugh because it’s true that you struggle with being too stubborn and closed off to make friends. Somehow, this jk.seagull guy knows you too well.

With that, you close your browser and open the messaging app on your phone. But rather than texting Seokjin like you had originally planned, you start a new chat.

9:37PM Y/N “Taehyung, Jungkook, let’s meet up tomorrow morning if you guys are free to work on the project”

9:38PM Y/N “💃💃💃”

You aren’t sure why you felt the need to include a stream of dancing girl emojis, but maybe it’s the least you can do in an effort to be more friendly.

9:40PM Taehyung “Yeah I’m not free lol”

9:40PM Jungkook “im free💃💃💃”

You’re so distracted by the fact that Jungkook reciprocated the same dancing girl emojis that you skim right over Taehyung’s message.

9:41PM Y/N “Good. Let’s meet at the mall tomorrow at 10?”

A/N: next time on dragon ball z, y/n and jungkook will legit interact, i swear💋

[taeguboi]

BTS as... Punks

So hahahahaha idk why it posted my extremely incomplete draft earlier (bug with the app?) So consider that now deleted post as a preview hahaha

Requested: “BTS as Punks please!”

RM

activist

anything that's for a good cause

he's behind it

probably makes his own charity

for something close to his heart

and puts on punk events a few times a week

music

poetry

all kinds of food stalls

suitable for everyone’s dietary needs

the occasional street protest

quite laid back though

but the things he has done have had a huge impact on people’s lives

he feeds the poor at his music events

he takes in donations from people to aid the homeless

basically against those unfair imbalances you get in society

he wants to be in a punk band 

but at the same time it isn’t really for him

so sometimes he just grabs a guitar 

and busks with improvised lyrics 

things that are on his mind

things about the world at present

and the things the talks and posts about to people inspire writers of bands

kind of like a journalist

he knows everyone on the local punk scne

he’s been involved ever since he was a kid

smokes a fair amount like

“cool mate, cool beans... right, I’m just off out for a fag”

not many piercings as you might expect

like mostly his ears

and a few intimate areas...

always has colourful punk hair

probably a low key mohawk

several meaningful tattoos

because his family is everything

so is this one person in his life

some drunken tattoos also hahaha

couple of face tatts

always a gentleman to girls

if there’s a creep on the scene 

just tell him

that guy will be exposed 

and gone for good from this local punk scene

and beyond as far as his contacts can take him

he just wants a safe scene

will fend for anyone though really

has a local watering hole

go down to that pub on any afternoon 

and there’s 90% chance he is there

mostly just for the people

maybe buys only 2 drinks the whole time usually

but if he gets drunk

get your notepad and pen

he’s gonna throw 196489 contacts your way

so if your band are ever in need of a gig

you know who to call

Jin

at first, doing punk music is merely a hobby

but then it turns into something more

his pleasure in busking turns into a passion

a dream to make it with a band

so he gets together the best people he knows

and they fucking rock

no one can say a bad thing about Jin’s punk band

they rehearsed diligently for so long

so they sound so tight

he rocks the denim jacket

with all the patches

some badges too

a ton of badges are on his bag though instead

and stickers on his guitar case

a fan of every band he performs with

his guitar case is choc a bloc with local band stickers

so he doesn’t have a mohawk

but his bangs progressively get messier

occasionally he dyes them [example, like V’s green bangs in hyyh era]

he changes loads in little ways

like you leave school and he’s this ‘ordinary’ lad

but then you bump into him like 7 years later 

and wtf he’s stunning

like his aura changed

you thought maybe he’d go into like a business job

but he’s rocking the stage most nights a week

you can’t help but go support him more

and maybe something happens from there but that can be a story for another time

and so maybe he doesn’t get BIG with this band

but he earns a sustainable income

and that’s more than good enough

life is good

music, booze and girls

no drugs tho

wise in that sense, contrary to some punk stereotypes

kind of fluffy actually

some say he’s a poser

but he just likes to look good

and is aware how certain rougher looks just really don’t suit him

so that’s all there is to that 

actually that’s all there is to this

the end :P

Suga

probably a performer too

maybe more into the dub / ska kind of genre

full of stage presence and hype

when he has a message

he fucking gets it across

because he’s so assertive

as well as those catchy melodies

just messy af hair

doesn’t care for it to be any particular length or style

just keep it natural

in fact, fuck visuals

no dress sense whatsoever

like he has a green shirt on with pink jeans and yellow converse

sound is all that matters

so what else?

solitary

like he could be backed up by a band

but fuck that

if he has the equipment that can do it all then why not?

it’s easier to work alone

so he supports like 876 charity events

and has a big share of festivals

headline material

especially at the proper hippie festivals

great for people high af

great for drunkards

great for sober peeps too

you get it, great for everyone

apart from perhaps kids 

cos swearing

sometimes you need that bit of aggression in lyrics, right?

he’s not as aggressive as he might seem on stage

but something is pent up in there

and he is one rough boy

actually, a lot like badboy!suga

can handle anything

but can you handle him?

J-Hope

idk why I always imagine him as a skater

but here we go

in a skate punk band

bass player

can also do drums tho

backwards caps for life

that one band member you think is shy af

cos he seems so quiet

but the moment you say ‘hey’ and congratulate him on a good show

he can talk your ear off for hours

again no drugs

but plenty of beer

cos getting drunk is funnier

the world is a more enjoyable place with skate punk and alcohol

seriously it really is, take that from me hahah

graffiti projects

either for promotion

or to help like restless kids as a distraction or something

let’s just say that’s something he can relate to

may or may not be how he got into this whole skate punk stuff

so yeah will take any charity gig

doesn’t mind if venues pay him in beer

he would have spent the dollar on that anyways

all about living it up with his mates

bros before hoes

has a side band that’s like party punk

any excuse to get bros together

for a good old knees up

only bands of his close friends get played in the car

girls are quite interested in him

but lmao he’s having none of it

he just wants to embrace life

don’t need anything more than mates and family

but he writes really cool songs on the topic of love

you know without being too soppy with it being punk and all

but it’s fucking amazing

but no one knows where he gets the ideas from

no one knows where he gets his energy from either 

will jump off everything and anything

on certain days, he’ll climb everything and anything too

just a fun loving cool punk

Jimin

more or less that one guy you see everywhere on the scene

he’s not in a band

doesn’t really do his own music

but he’s a fan of his scene

every weekend, he’s somewhere to see punk music

be it the local pub for one of his faves

or a town centre for a punk charity thing

or even miles away to see someone he knows getting bigger

leather

with a few patches

piercings

all the ear piercings you could imagine

lips and tongue

used to have an eyebrow one

but decided he looked too generic

or like a chav

something or other

he knows he doesn’t have the most original look

but he can’t stand being too similar to someone else

if anyone in this room tonight is wearing a leather jacket and completely black clothing

he might just tear it off himself and / or burn it

abs and tatts are a good look anyone so doesn’t matter

probably works out to punk music

high school drop out

because he started to realize how useless it is

so he’s generally clever where it’s more relevant in life

saves money well

good paying job

can fund his love for punk basically

and each and every band he supports fully appreciates it

I’m sorry guys I swear there isn’t a not fluffy Jimin gif for me to use hahaha

V

so yeah I’m sorry if this turns out too similar to

badboy!V

because I literally made him a punk in that hc

I’m thinking he’s a lead singer of a punk band

that raspy voice works to his advantage

capable of hardcore punk genres

but prefers and sticks to a more rock n roll kind of punk

long hair

whatever colour he feels like this month

piercings galore

tatts galore

will put a needle anywhere on his body

lives on the edge

lives in the moment

yolo

arrests

protests

he’s done it all

cos fuck the law man

if something about society bothers him

he will speak up

fearless boy

will get his band a gig anywhere in the country

he has things he needs to say

thoughts to spread

only uses social media for punk

his profile is just of gig pictures of his own and sharing events

not your typical singer

kind of writes everything

the band just copy / pick up what he shows them

busks alone sometimes too

may or may not make extra dollar from sneaky acoustic gigs

but it’s not out of selfishness, no

he will always have a goal in mind

and good intentions

like he wants to band to afford professional recordings

or he wants to set up and event

that kind of thing

pay attention

to the things he talks about in his music

you’ll learn a lot

Jungkook

drummer

just needs to hit something

so as long as it isn’t people then great

basically the world screwed him over in some way at some point

and it made him rethink his views about the world

for ages it was restless frustration about it all

but then he discovered punk

the day he discovered his local scene

he wrote random poetry for days

the words had flow to them

but they were unconventional

and then a mate sees it

and he’s like “dude this is sick”

and a band is formed

likes a bit of everything

has friends he can go to the skate park with

has mates to mosh with at hardcore gigs

has friends he can chill with for ska

quite a late learner with the drums

but he must have a natural talent for it

because he becomes amazing in just under 2 years

can do any genre of punk

everyone wants him in their new projects

he’s the guy everyone needs if their guy quits

you know, the demand for Jungkook’s drumming is insance

fortunately he’s wise enough to just stick with the first 3 bands

cos like I say not only does he drum for them

but his creative input for lyrics is huge

just sit him down, give him a topic and bam

he’s just written you a verse and chorus

what else?

50% backwards caps

25% forwards cap

25% lost his cap

somewhat forgetful in areas other than drumming

maybe a bit of a stoner like

“oh yeah man! I forgot about that!

the way his cap is on does often depend on level of alcohol in his blood

forwards for business

backwards for sloshed party animal

breaks a lot of drum sticks by accident

breaks a few hearts by accident welp

I guess girls and guys just notice the muscle 

which he never hides well

cos of course as a drummer, you’re gonna wear a vest really

yeah, that’s pretty much it

[fibula-rasa]

August 2018 in Review

I have a weird memory. It’s highly pattern-driven and very visual. This means that my memory of films I’ve watched is based on images and series of images that made an impression instead of plot points. It’s why I rewatch movies so often. Even though I’ve been tracking my movie viewing habits for two and a half years, that doesn’t mean I’ve created strong memories for all those movies. That’s why I’m gonna start doing monthly roundups of the new-to-me films that struck me, one way or the other.

[If you wanna know all the films I’m watching, I keep full lists on letterboxd and imdb.]

The reviews below are essentially transcriptions of the notes I took right after watching the films. Because of Summer Under the Stars and my cosplay challenge, this month was pretty TCM heavy for me.

Full Roundup BELOW THE JUMP!

Teen Titans Go to the Movies (2018)

27 July 2018 | 84 min. | Color

Directed and Written by Aaron Horvath and Peter Rida Michail

Starring Greg Cipes, Scott Menville, Khary Payton, Tara Strong, and Hynden Walch

I’m already a fan of the show and the movie kicks it up a notch with its humor and style. [If you liked the original series, give TTG a chance already.] TTG to the Movies is a great superhero movie for anyone who’s down for superhero stories but is fatigued by the current spate of offerings. Grain-of-Salt warning here because I think Superman III (1983) is great.  

Fun that they included some gags here and there for the parents out there who’ve had to hear the Waffles song a few too many times. Also, one of the best ending gags for a kid’s movie ever.

Where to Watch: Still in theaters, but I’d imagine Cartoon Network will be playing it soon.

Doctor X (1932)

27 August 1932 | 76 min. | 2-strip Technicolor

Directed by Michael Curtiz

Written by Earl Baldwin and Robert Tasker

Starring Lionel Atwill, Lee Tracy, and Fay Wray

I made the statement that Darkman (1990) is the most comic-book movie that isn’t adapted from a comic book. I hadn’t seen Doctor X yet though.

The set pieces are phenomenal. Each shot is artfully constructed and the way the shots are strung together makes the most of the production design. If one were to do a comic adaptation, it would take some imaginative work to not just mimic the film. The 2-strip technicolor is particularly effective in the laboratory scenes in creating an eerie aura. Sensational.

Lee Tracy is playing, as usual, a press man and he’s doing so perfectly. Tracy is so underrated.

Where to Watch: Looks like the DVD is out of print, so maybe check your local library or video store. TCM plays it every once and a while and, since Warner Bros has a deal with Filmstruck, I wouldn’t be surprised to see it pop up there eventually.

The Half-Naked Truth (1932)

16 December 1932 | 77 min. | B&W

Directed by Gregory La Cava

Written by Corey Ford and Gregory La Cava

Starring Frank Morgan, Eugene Pallette, Lee Tracy, and Lupe Velez

You might very well think Lee Tracy was a featured TCM star this month. (Maybe next SUTS? Pretty please.)

Lupe Velez is so talented and natural it was nice to see her in a film where her wits were matched. I’ll be honest, I’m a big Lupe fan but, for most of her films, she’s the only good reason to watch them. This wasn’t the case here! There are a lot of wonderful moments with small movements and gestures that make Velez and Tracy’s relationship feel very real, as if they’re actually that caught up in one another. Eugene Pallette, Franklin Pangborn, and Frank Morgan round out the ensemble. The running eunuch joke might not be all that funny, but it’s a masterclass in not saying what you mean. Also, very cute chihuahua.

Where to Watch: The DVD is available from the Warner Archive. (So, once again, local library or video store might have a copy.)

The Cuban Love Song (1931)

5 December 1931 | 86 min. | B&W

Directed by W.S. Van Dyke

Written by John Lynch, Bess Meredith, and C. Gardener Sullivan

Starring Jimmy Durante, Lawrence Tibbett, Ernest Torrance, and Lupe Velez

Lupe is wonderful in this. She plays a Cuban woman who sounds an awful lot like a Mexican woman--which might be something you have to overlook to enjoy the film FYI. Lawrence Tibbett has a shocking dearth of charisma in the lead, but Jimmy Durante, Ernest Torrence, and Louise Fazenda take the heat off him well. It’s a little hard to root for Tibbett’s character and the ending is disappointing. (Spoiler: privileging of the affluent “white” couple.)

The songs are great. I love the habit of placing people in musicals so that they are singing full force directly into each other’s faces. I don’t know why I find it so funny, but it’s not a mood ruiner for Cuban Love Song. The editing is fun and energetic. Until the war breaks out, there’s a lot of solid humor.

After watching so many Lupe films this month, I’d love to sit down with people who do and don’t know Spanish to talk about her films. There seem to be some divisions on social media and across blogs about Lupe’s films that might be attributable to whether or not one understands Spanish. I myself understand Spanish reasonably well and I think knowing what Lupe and others are saying makes almost all of her films funnier. And boy, does Lupe like calling men stupid animals.

Where to Watch: This one seems kinda rare. Looks like there may have been a VHS release, but you may just have to wait for TCM to play it again!

The Night Stalker (1972)

11 January 1972 | 74 min. | Color

Directed by John Llewellyn Moxey

Written by Jeffrey Grant Rice and Richard Matheson

Starring Carol Lynley, Darren McGavin, and Simon Oakland

and

The Night Strangler (1973)

16 January 1973 | 74 min. | Color

Directed by Dan Curtis

Written by Jeffrey Grant Rice and Richard Matheson

Starring Darren McGavin, Simon Oakland, and Jo Ann Pflug

I loved that these films are exactly like the Kolchak TV series. My SO and I have been watching the show weekly as it airs on MeTV and so he surprised me by renting the movies that kicked off the series. Honestly, watching backwards may have made the movies even more entertaining. How is Kolchak still working for Vincenzo in Las Vegas?? The answer is in Seattle.

The TV movies were intended as a trilogy, but after the success of the first two films, it was developed into a series instead. It’s cool to see how every piece of the Kolchak formula was in place immediately and how firmly Darren McGavin had a hold on the character. His chemistry with Simon Oakland (Vincenzo) is spectacular--a great comedy duo TBH. If you like their shouting matches on the show, Night Strangler has a humdinger to offer you.

Night Stalker is a pretty straight-forward vampire story, written by Richard Matheson, one of the great spec-fic writers of the 1960s and 1970s. Matheson also wrote one of the best undead novels of all time, I am Legend. What elevates the film over the basic mythology, aside from the great performances, pacing, and editing, is that the story’s really about how suppression actually goes down--how mundane and frustrating it can be even in the face of the supernatural.

Night Strangler is a little more creative with its monster. They integrate the nature and landmarks of Seattle in fun ways. The stripper characters are delightful. Jo Ann Pflug gives a truly funny performance and feels like a natural contender for Kolchak. Even his romantic relationships should be affectionately combative. The ditzy lesbian, Charisma Beauty (Nina Wayne) is hilarious and Wayne’s timing is impeccable. (BTW: they don’t explicitly call her a lesbian but it’s still made very overt.) There’s also a wonderful cameo by Margaret Hamilton.

As far as I can tell, it’s easier to get access to these films than the series. They’re worth seeing even if you haven’t seen the Kolchak TV show. They’re also a good pick if you’re a fan of X-Files, as Kolchak is the mother of that show. Even though I’m an X-Files fan and grew up watching it, Kolchak is edging it out for me lately. Maybe because if you’re telling a story about fighting for truth against the suppression of information, you undercut yourself by making the protagonist a fed.

Where to Watch: Kino Lorber is releasing restored editions of the films on Blu-ray and DVD in October!

The Mask of Dimitrios (1944)

1 July 1944 | 95 min. | B&W

Directed by Jean Negulesco

Written by Frank Gruber

Starring Sydney Greenstreet, Peter Lorre, and Zachary Scott

This was great! I loved Peter Lorre and Sydney Greenstreet together. If you’re looking for a mystery story that flows and escalates well and presents a parade of interesting characters and locales, Dimitrios is for you. It’s also always nice to see Lorre in the lead.

Where to Watch: The DVD is available from the Warner Archive. (So, once again, local library or video store might have  copy.)

Strait-Jacket (1964)

19 January 1964 | 93 min. | B&W

Directed by William Castle

Written by Robert Bloch

Starring Diane Baker and Joan Crawford

I mentioned in my Joan Crawford CUTS post that I’d been meaning to see this for years. My enjoyment of the film didn’t suffer a bit from that length of anticipation.

I like William Castle’s movies a lot. I like the campy humor and quirky stories. This one is campy still, but not as heavy on the humor--unless you have a real weird sense of humor. That’s not a strike against Strait-Jacket though. Castle builds so much tension that by the end of the film, you feel like anyone could be axe-murdered at any moment, which becomes absurdly fun. The ending might be a little predictable, but it’s fun to go along for the ride. I didn’t particularly like the tacked on ending but I guess every JC movie needs to end on JC?

Largely unrelated, but if you’re a Castle fan, have you checked out his TV show Ghost Story/Circle of Fear? The first episode, The New House, in particular is top notch.

Where to Watch: It’s on Blu-ray and DVD from Sony (your local library or video store might have a copy) and it’s for rent on Amazon Prime. It’s also still on-demand via TCM for another few days.

One I didn’t write up: Cairo (1942). I brought up in my Jeanette MacDonald post that I was hoping to find a MacDonald film I enjoyed watching on her Summer Under the Stars day and I did!

[ryanmeft]

Farewell, and Good Riddance, to The Big Bang Theory

Imagine, if you will, a half hour sitcom about black people. One of the characters speaks nothing but an exaggerated version of what the writers think is “street” talk, listens to nothing but gangster rap, and swaggers like he’s on stage wherever he goes. For another, the trait that becomes his running joke is how he never looks for a job; once an episode the laugh track kicks up to orgasm levels in response to a one-liner about how many kids he’s avoiding the child support payments on. The woman living next door reacts to their repeated antics by balling her fists on her hips, leaning forward and, as the show puts it, “throwing out some sass”…when she’s not offering to whip them up some watermelon and fried chicken. Their apartment is located in a rundown part of town, and each episode begins with them being comically awakened to the sound of gunfire.

If you’re already appalled, you reacted the way you should. This would be a show composed entirely of the dumbest, most prevalent racial stereotypes that non-black people believe about black people. Worse, it would be using those things for a cheap laugh. The “characters” as I have presented them there would not be people at all, but crude punchlines that only appeal to those outside the group being ostensibly depicted.  

If you understand why that opening paragraph was offensive in every possible way, you’re on your way to grasping why your nerd friends so loathed The Big Bang Theory. There are plenty of great articles out there already beating the ever-loving life out of this godawful shitshow, so I want to be a little more serious and tackle the very real reasons it is a goiter on the ass of pop culture.

The only bad thing about The Big Bang Theory ending is that it didn’t happen before season one. I have had the profound misfortune of seeing many episodes in full, particularly towards the beginning of the show when my non-nerdy friends insisted I just had to see this thing.

“It’s about you.”

Statements like that made me wonder how we were friends. Tellingly, most of the people who once said it are no longer in my life. They weren’t cut from it because they liked a TV show. They weren’t cut from it at all. Gradually, it simply occurred to me they’d never really understood me and, given they thought I was like this or that Big Bang character, I’m honestly surprised some of those friendships lasted as long as they did.

The Big Bang Theory got away with rampant, blatant stereotypes about nerds for a long time, and for one major reason: it catered to people outside the group it was ostensibly depicting. It never attempted to be fair or even-handed toward nerd culture. Nerds, who comprise a wide variety of people of many different personality types and interests, were boiled down to a few stereotypes that might be true of some nerds somewhere, but were hardly true of the group. The problem wasn’t that none of the things ever depicted were ever true about anyone, anywhere; it was that every single thing these people did was based on those handful of things.

This was not a show that would ever write a starring role for a socially well-adjusted adult who happened to like video games. This was not a show that would ever star a character who prioritized their relationships over their hobbies without having to be repeatedly told to do so. This was not a show that would ever depict Howard as an otherwise independent adult who had to move back in with family because, say, he lost his job, or was inflicted with a disability (this idea of “living with mom” has long been funny to successful people free of such challenges because it is unlikely to happen to them). It does not depict nerds dealing with real life, as opposed to Sitcom “Real” Life.

Yet such people are far, far more reflective of the people I know from comic conventions, gaming circles, and just general nerdism than anything ever seen on The Big Bang Theory. I know a man with a basement full of more expensive Marvel statues than I would ever dream of owning, who is also a bodybuilder and a skilled mechanic. I know a successful Latino cop (note: all principles on The Big Bang Theory are white) who writes and reads comics and completely schools me on the topic of superhero history. I know a bisexual man who struggles with an actual, for real mental condition (not the coded kind designed to be made fun of that Sheldon represents) who reads far more comics than I and who would never prioritize them over his relationships. I know people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder who have to have medical assistance to avoid destroying their lives with repetitive behaviors and thoughts that are forced on them by something in their brain chemistry they would never choose. Sheldon is no funnier to them than a Mexican who can’t get enough beans and Tequila would be to a Latino person.

This might not be that big a deal, accept for the fact that not belonging to the “cool” group has always been a lightning rod for bullying, insults, ostracism , and social shame, something that can and absolutely does continue from school into adulthood. Nor does the argument that it’s “just a sitcom” hold water. Sitcoms have given our media-obsessed world sympathetic, anti-stereotypical portrayals of the working class (All in the Family, Roseanne*), African Americans (The Cosby Show*, The Jeffersons) and homosexual people (Will & Grace), to name a few. By comparison, The Big Bang Theory is the TV equivalent of getting mocked as you walk down the hall to class for not being cool enough. It does not make any attempt to edify the lives of outsiders for the benefit of a wider audience; it instead reduces the outsiders to further punchlines for those whose lives are more accepted socially.

Many people have a passion for something and don’t care what everyone else thinks of it. The reason we have “nerds” at all is because society has collectively taken it upon themselves to decide what is and isn’t cool or acceptable to be passionate about. Video games? Weird. Cars? Cool. Comic books? Weird. Sports? Cool. Model building? Weird. Architecture? Cool. A lot more people than you likely think probably fall on both sides of this arbitrary line. You want to know the day we stop hating The Big Bang Theory? The day when there’s a show about people who can fix an engine AND tell you all about The Hulk. Until then, the blemish left by the show in an era when TV and movies are scrambling to show more respect toward, and variety in, ostracized groups is not something we’re likely to laugh with.

*I am aware these two shows have since been heavily tarred by the off-screen behavior of their stars, but it doesn’t change the fact they were heavily influential in the way their groups are portrayed in the media and the public consciousness.