#and i love impulse buys

[bonefall]

the worst parent poll made me realize just how many ppl in the fandom are willing to jump straight into abuse apologia. bc on one hand you have ppl dumbing down crow's abuse to "him just being mean" and on the other end you have ppl saying that curlfeather didnt abuse frostpaw because she sacrificed herself and frost + her siblings love her so she couldnt possibly be an abuser. truly mindboggling stuff take these serious topics away from the fandom asap.

Part of me feels like it's because many in this fandom have a feeling that if a character's actions are abusive, it means you're "not allowed" to like them. Like there's an impulse where if you liked a character, it MUST mean they weren't THAT bad, because you'd personally never like "an abuser."

As if it reflects poorly on your own morality, as a person, that you connected with An Abuser. Understood them, even. Even if it was just a character.

If it's immoral to Like Abusive Characters, of course your reaction is going to end up being abuse apologia. To enjoy something isn't logical, it's emotional, so you will get defensive about it when questioned. When you do, it's not going to be based on logic because you didn't reason yourself into that position in the first place. It's an attack on you as a person.

I feel like that's often the root of abuse apologia in this fandom, and sometimes the world at large; "If I admit that this character/person IS abusive, it means I was doing something bad by liking them, so I have to prove to everyone else that they weren't or it means I'm bad too."

And to that I say... That's a BAD impulse! Grow up and admit you resonated with a character that did a bad thing! If that's an uncomfortable thought, sit with it!

Sometimes abusers are likeable! They usually DO think they're justified in their actions, or doing it for "a good reason," or were just too preoccupied to care. MOST of the time, people who commit abusive actions are also hurt or traumatized in some way. You might even empathize with them. None of this means their actions have to be excused or downplayed.

"Abusers" aren't a type of goddamn yokai, they're people just like you and me. You don't help victims of abuse by putting the people who hurt us in an "untouchable" category.

In fact, all it does is make you less likely to recognize your own controlling behavior. You're capable of abuse. People you love are capable of it, too. People who love YOU can still hurt you.

In spite of how often people regurgitate "It's Ok To Like A Character As Long As You're Critical Of Their Actions," every day it is proven to me further and further that no one who says it actually understands what that means.

All that said; I think it's no contest which one's a worse parent, imo.

They both mistreated their children, but Curlfeather did it through manipulation without verbal or physical abuse. She politically groomed her into a position of power so that she could use her as a pawn. It can be argued if this counts as child abuse-- but it's firmly still under the broad category childhood maltreatment, which is damaging.

(though anon I'm with you 100% at seeing RED when "but she sacrificed herself" is used as an excuse. Curlfeather's death does NOT CHANGE what she did to Frostpaw in life. I think it's a valid point to bring up when comparing her to another terrible parent for judgement purposes, such as in the context of this poll, but I really hate the implication that redemption deaths "make up" for maltreatment.)

Crowfeather, meanwhile, is textually responsible for putting Breezepaw through verbal AND physical abuse, as well as child neglect. His motivations include embarrassment from a hurt ego, revenge on his ex, and being sad because of a dead girlfriend. This abuse drives Breezepelt towards radicalization in the Dark Forest.

You could argue Curlfeather is a worse person for Reedwhisker's murder, but as a parent? It's not even a question to me. Crowfeather's one of the worst dads in WC.

[masakia]

Everyday I fight the urge of writing a destiel fic where everything is the same but Dean has a baby girl (the mother didn't want to be involved cause they were both young, like 24 maybe.) So Dean is like "well I guess I'm gonna parent this child now" and yeah he raised Sam and he did the best job he could with the circumstances they were given, but something about this little girl makes Dean wanna cry everytime he looks at her and thinks how he doesn't know how to give her a better life.

Anyway she would be two at the first season and Dean would put her hair up in silly hairstyles and Sam just has to reset himself when he enters the impala during the first episode and there is just baby stuff on the back seat.

When Cas shows up the baby gets attached to him really fast and Cas, who has never interacted with a baby before, holds her by the back of her clothes like she is a kitten.

[the-crooked-library]

"Louis and Armand were still in love in Dubai!!" "Louis and Armand never loved each other!!" - no. it's worse. they were on the precipice of something good, but Armand couldn't recognize that, so he ruined everything they had, right when Louis had actually come to love him. the love was there for a fleeting moment and it was ruined irreversibly, never to return, even after decades they'd spent together out of desperation and spite. it's worse and that's the point

[fauvester]

something something seeing things through different eyes

[ftl-faster-than-life]

If you're a Flash fan and you can afford the $8, please buy The Speed Force and Jay Garrick: The Flash. This is the first time since the 90's that we've had more than one book at a time and it's really important that we let DC know that there's support and an audience for Flashfam books. Hit or miss, the important part is supporting the titles so that they keep making this extra Flash content. If you like an 'obscure' Flashfam member, this is how you tell DC there's room to tell their stories. You can find digital editions on Amazon and through the DC store, and you can also order them in hard copies here: https://www.tfaw.com/catalogsearch/result/?q=speed+force https://www.tfaw.com/catalogsearch/result/?q=Jay+Garrick+The+Flash

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

Replenishing the Nonfiction Stack; or, We're Calling the Book Buying Ban a Wash, Officially.

I am not, apparently, immune to coupons for niche nonfiction that's directly up my alley (octopus minds and RUSSIAN OWLS, hello??? Thanks, bookshop!).

I thought perhaps the BURGLAR'S GUIDE would also be covered under said coupon, since it was publisher-specific (alas: it was Not, but we might as well bundle for shipping purposes). And then while I was shopping IRL for gifties I found a copy of ROOM, which has been on my list for...ever? So! Hopefully these will hold me over on the nonfiction front for a minute!

[cicadagaze]

girl who causes problems for funsies:

[sleepytoycollection]

since getting into MLP I've thrifted a lot of ponies, particularly g4 ones bc I like the show, and thought it'd be fun to have a diverse range of characters besides just collecting Fluttershy and Discord, but I think I just need to accept that I don't like these toys enough for that.

Like, with Fluttershy, I love her enough that I enjoy all her toys that I have just because they're her. She has blorbo privilege I guess lol.

But like, do I need to keep all these Rainbow Dash figures I'm lukewarm at best about? Yeah, no. Sorry RD, it's not that I don't like you, I just don't like your toys very much.

[happi-dreams]

penis crew !!! but finished designs!!

plus a silly doodle of my au emmet being i dunno adopmetd

[bluemoon160]

GUYS GUYS GUYS. I ordered an Archer keychain and sticker sheet from @janitoad and I am over the MOON 😭🫶💖

Here’s a pic of everything including some awesome freebies they threw in!

This keychain is the cutest thing ever I’m gonna cry

Also this sticker is literally everything LMAOOO 10/10 please order from this person. You will NOT be disappointed.

[zeph-phyr]

i just made the scariest purchase of my life. i think he's goingto eat me im shaking.....

[dailycupofcreativitea]

I GOT AN OTGW CARDIGAN!!!! OMG!!!

[youngpettyqueen]

My parents don’t have tumblr (thank god) which means they think my way of describing Hawkeye is hilarious. So far their favourites are “he endears me the way a rain-soaked alley cat endears a tender-hearted middle-aged woman” and “he’s a feral raccoon of a man with grabby hands and I think he bites”

[iamthepulta]

The best thing about Italy and Europe is that linen just- exists here. I can go buy a shitty cheap 100% linen dress like I would go to Fry's and buy a shitty cheap 100% polyester dress in America. Absolutely revolutionary for my wardrobe. I can't actually buy wardrobe enhancements because I have a carry-on suitcase, but the fact I still have the option is amazing.

[leonsliga]

*squealing uncontrollably*

[sleepnoises]

I'm not reblogging the long post about sewing machine planned obsolescence because I feel it's slightly apples and oranges but what I WILL say is now I am looking at sewing machines on craigslist and having a delightful time. So many strange beasts