#and i keep randomly crying
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ha
#ignore this#i just have so much fucking anxiety#and my depression is hitting me like a feckin train#which is great bc it hasn't be bothering me for a while#but of course it's showing up bc my life is going to shit rn#so it's FINE#i have no energy#for anything#and i keep randomly crying#and i'm just#lmao i'm not okay#and the person i usually talk to about this stuff is#not really in my life anymore#so#idk i'm crying into the void i guess#everything kinda really sucks right now and i know it'll be better eventually#it can't rain forever or whatever#but god it really fucking sucks right now#and i really wish i didn't have to deal with this#i'm so tired#i'm so fucking tired god#anyways ignore this i'm just#complaining#i guess#personal rambles#not stargate
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History repeats itself
#twisted wonderland#malleus draconia#lilia vanrouge#meleanor draconia#twst spoilers#diasomnia spoilers#that update HAUNTS me I keep crying when i randomly remember details of it#and so many parallels happening gosh
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i love fluffy soft bingqiu kidfics, i swear, but i would love to explore a more insecure afraid terrified concerned worried etc binghe. especially if shizun is carrying. tlj is NOT done haunting him just because he turned out to be alive
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#this man would worry cry and shiver randomly dont PLAY with me#/lh#why the fuck do i keep calling sqq shizun im so embarrassing WHAT is this#.txt
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EXTREMELY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
I HAVE A NEW PUPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#🧃.txt#WAHHHHHHHHHH#WE JUST GOT HER THIS MORNING#im so excited!!!!! we haven't had a new dog in a really long time#shes the cutest little baby ever shes only 41 days old but shes SO BIG and her fur is super soft#she just got here so shes still very shy and kinda sad she keeps crying randomly and its so saddddd#i hope she gets used to living here soon#shes also very sleepy shes being spending most of her time napping but i dont know if thats bc shes just a baby yet#regardless im so. over the moon i love her so much#charlotte
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Hi, I woke up to this yesterday, and my brain is still exploding.
I don't even know how they came across my Ko-fi with how little traffic I got, but they did and were wonderful and I am so unbelievably grateful???
I can't even remember the last time I felt truly hopeful, but here I am. Feeling hopeful.
Wow.
What a world.
#art#comics#i don't even know what to tag this as#success???#how do you even properly thank someone for something like this#just saying 'thank you' doesn't feel like enough#they deserve a 'best person' medal to put around their neck#and also a 'best person' trophy to put up on their mantel or shelf or wherever they think it would look best#i'm still randomly crying just from the relief of not having this giant stressor weighing me down anymore#i've had so many stressors i just had to constantly live with that i didn't even know that was a thing that could happen#crying from relief??? what??? sounds fake - except it keeps happening#i don't know what else to say except THANK YOU and also I'M CRYING AGAIN AHAHA BYE
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to the person who commented "stories like yours make me wanna fall in love again" on one of my fics. i love you i love you i love you i lov ee you i love you i love you i love yuo i love you i love tou i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i lo
#i keep crying about it#thats. oh my god#holy shit#i dont even have words for that like what the fuck#that’s the kind of comment i will think about for the rest of my life#and you leave it on MY FIC?????#FUCKING BONKERS#i love you i love you i love you#i randomly remember this comment at least once a day and it punches me in the chest#GODDDD#fanfic
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bitches love me for my Allister doodles
#liazrad talks#I'm the self proclaimed CEO of Allister#you can always count on me to drop art of him randomly 💜#he's been my blorbo since the moment i saw him five years ago...#it took me a bit to start posting fan art of him bc i was being a swsh hater at first but god. he bewitched me.#i tried to avoid swsh because of the glaring issues with it and its development but god. Allister. Allister....#that little guy has cost me nearly $400 since he gained blorbo status. and that number will increase. GUARANTEED!!!#i need to acquire cards of him as well as perhaps a poster#and a keychain if i can find one from a decent artist#....or.....i could make my own keychain...#did you know?? sometimes i look at his rare league card and literally cry because he's so cute. this is abnormal behavior for me#sometimes. you find a character that resonates with you so much that they stick with you forever#i think Allister might just be that character for me. my other favs change but Allister is always there#even when I'm deranged about other shit i keep him in the back of my mind#i feel like i might end up like my grandma who has a life long obsession with The Beatles. except I'll love Allister.
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been having the worst week in my life since a long while ago. the year 2025 has barely started and it already sucks so much.
#not gonna go into much detail because just thinking about it just makes me cry again but#on monday i needed to have one of my cats donna euthanized#i've had her since she was 3 months old and i held her when she was a newborn - i've been there for her always#she would've turned 12 later this year#i've cried so much since it happened and for once i am glad i've had work every day this week#because at least that has given me other things to think about#but when i'm at home i keep thinking about donna all the time and just randomly bursting out crying#anyway that's also why i haven't been here on tumblr for a few days again#i just don't feel like doing anything#i do wanna make a photo compilation of my girl at one point but right now i can't even manage to do that#it hurts too much#personal
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like a lamb to the slaughter
#far cry 5#🥪⛰️☆° ﾟ- jacobmilo#jacob seed x deputy#fc5#jacob seed#oc: miroslav radojevic#far cry 5 oc#i keep feeling like i missed shading something? but we ball#inspired by this rkvl art i randomly saw i cant find the artist anymore tho#also lighting principles r a bitch#my art
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guy who has to talk about interview with the vampire every 30 seconds or he’ll get sick and die: im getting a lot of ‘interview with the vampire’ vibes from this…
#it’s actually sooo bad you guys i keep randomly crying#i bought the first two books so. im sorry for the person i will become in 4-14 business days#as if im not already monstrously hyperfixated#i guess you could say i. could not control it#i meant prevent it btw im a fake fan#iwtv
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the last week has genuinely been my villain origin story fyi hence my absence LMAOO anyway i will be making an attempt at catching up on my inbox rn
#multiple serious traumatic events have hit my friend group in the last two weeks#and it has taken a toll. so pls be kind if i am not really around for a bit LOL#and pls keep us in your thoughts. ty#it’s so silly. i just keep spacing out and crying randomly and i haven’t even been hit by the Curse yet#anyway back to malpractice doctor posting
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Well. It's been a good run, but I'm getting my hair cut today.
#let's just hope I don't randomly burst out crying#it's not even really long yet but :( I wanna keeps it
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yeah i’m over it. no the random crying isn’t related
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you ever miss your comfort character so bad you gotta go outside about it
#idk i've been pretty stressed that's probably why i randomly got rly sad abt it#and by it i mean the uh. gestures vaguely at fandom i guess#either nobody's there or it feels like i'm not exactly welcome. or both! which tough shit i'mma take up the space regardless but like#this weird sense of elitism I get in a space that's built by and nurtured by people whose MO is 'caring a lot' is.. hm.. interesting#idk just got reminded this morning that some people view critique as a free pass to drag a creator through the mud#when what you SHOULD be doing is uplifting them so that they can improve and reach their maximum potential. you clown. you absolute buffoon#it wasn't targeted at me or anything it just made me so angry/sad. smad. i'm smad about it#i just get hit with a wave of what's the point. what's the fucking point nobody cares abt things made with passion for the love of the game#we don't have time/it's not good enough/it doesn't matter/it's been done better/why x when we have y#and you know what fair enough everyone's entitled to their own emotional responses of course.#if you think your opinion is reason enough to tear it down then we're gonna have to agree to disagree on that one i think#just keep in mind that you could have loved what they made. other people could have loved it. it could have changed something for someone.#i personally know artists and have worked with artists who have put so so much effort into making something work over and over and over#only to have no audience and get back up saying guys let's give this just one more try.#hell back in the day I was an accomplished writer kid who was told that you may be good but nobody gives a fuck#artists who use up all these resources just to bring something new into the world and nobody's looking. what's the point. what's the point#anyway. i'm gonna go wade through the snow for a bit maybe sink my bare hands into it you guys want anything#started the post thinkin abt my blorbos ending it crying putting my shoes on alright I'm going I'm GETTING the FRESH AIR fuck off#i'll be god once i've gotten a bottle of coke and some mozzarella sticks. wait am i pmsing. fuck#god i hate that i don't drink sometimes.
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maybe I could get over the paralysing fear of any type of medical procedure or institution ever if it just meant they would rip this stupid unnecessary bitch organ out of me........
#I DON'T WANT THIS USELESS UTERUS IT DOES NOTHING BUT TAKE UP SPACE AND FUCK MY MOOD AND BLEED RANDOMLY?????#is there some kind of pill that makes you not have a period ever but that also isn't the actual pill because the actual pill is horrifying#i just want to get rid of this thing i don't need it i have never needed it i HATE IT#i'm not even on my period yet but i keep feeling like crying whenever someone even looks at me and i KNOW THAT'S HER FAULT#rayrambles
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Having some issues getting my meds refilled, so I am feeling sick as shit and dizzy and fainty…. I can tell the dogs r bored bc we haven’t been out in a couple days but they r still cuddling with me and that’s true friendship
#I a#buying them the biggest meatiest bone ever#I love them so so much#I keep crying randomly bc my brain chemicals r bad rn#the dogs r so good to me I know they want to be out for a run and yet they’re so well behaved and seeet
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