#and i just didnt have the skills to execute it lol

[cherrhara]

aschnata happily ever after

[lessnowon]

😔🤜🏻💥🤛🏻😔 solidarity

confession: TRoS ruined kylo/ben for me, despite not liking him previously.

when i watched TFA in the movie theater, i absolutely hated kylo ren (not in an "anti" way, it's simply a sign of a good villian). TLJ put him on thin ice with me because like 🤢 re*lo foreshadowing (yes in an anti way, but not the point of this post so dont @ me) but i otherwise still loved to hate him, even if i didn't understand why so many fans liked him. but then the dreaded TRoS happened and i was like... "huh, i miss kylo ren?"

i mean, i know that character development is a thing, but... what happened to my darth tantrum? what happened to "let the past die, kill it if you have to"? like, it baffles me that he ends TLJ having killed his master, been rejected by rey and rejected her in turn (again), claimed the title of supreme leader, and then been publicly humiliated by his uncle/ex-master—and then in TRoS he just... ditches everything he has achieved, lets go of all the perceived wrongs against him, reverts to ben, and kisses rey? and oh by the way it was Palpatine, still, all along?? isnt this supposed to be a new story?????

obviously he wouldn't end the final movie of the trilogy in the same as he was halfway through or at the start, but i think it's stupid that he had so much build up as a villain, actively rejecting the light side and redemption at every single turn—and he had many, many opportunities—only to spend most of the third movie on the side of the light, helping to defeat the exact same villain that was defeated three movies ago

like yeah, okay, he "finished vader's business" and "killed the past" by finally defeating darth sidious, but idk... the guy started out the trilogy so determined to uphold vader's legacy that he led the slaughter of every student at luke's temple a la anakin at the end of RotS, that he murdered and tortured innocents for years, and instead of realizing that "letting the past die" includes vader's legacy and making his own way, redeemed or not but still remaining kylo—or, hell, even evolving his ambition into the determination to outdo vader where vader fell short; killing the past by becoming the new, more powerful evil—he, what???? learns that he can just shed years of deliberate bad choices because none of it was his fault anyways, and all he has to do is repeat the past to be redeemed because he is just doomed to be an echo of his ancestors that contributes nothing genuinely new to his family history, anyways?

yeah i preferred the unstable and immature yet wildly overpowered possible-sociopath on the cusp of shedding his blinders and coming into his own...

[eddiegettingshot]

okay I sent the og haterism anon and yeah thats basically why it was last week for me. like the resolution was that eddie realized chris wasnt that happy and said you're leaving your grandparents house because I said so. and we couldn't have done that in 8a. okay... (i realize the halloween related network interference + making 8x02 two episodes was a big part of everything in 8a being moved around and probably impacted the eddiechris plot the most. but. they still did hotshots and wannabes.). obviously you dont have to respond to this bc Im just ranting now lol just Ive felt crazy for a week over so many people liking the resolution last week (which I thought WAS good in isolation. but not in the bigger picture of s7/s8) when Im just like. oh so eddie could have said chris come home anytime in 8a and that would have been it ? I get he didnt know. but then I just get frustrated about the whole thing again lol. I do get some of the eddie specific skill stuff in the emergency this week making it worse though as opposed last week which was a happy ending for him and chris . hopeful that hes around next week and that the whole 2 parter will feel a little less eddieless once we have both parts but we will see.. hope you have a good day tomorrow despite no eddie today <3

yeah i think there’s one level where it’s like, okay the execution isn’t nonsensical on a character level, i understand what they’re doing, and like i said before it’s even made me appreciate eddie as a character more. and then there’s another level where it literally just didn’t need to happen like this and while i was feeling very tolerant for a while at this point i could not be more over it and i also feel like on a bigger scale the pacing is SO off. even if the storyline had to extend across this many episodes it could have been given more room to breathe, addressed in a different way, etc. maybe next week will change my opinion i could always be wrong but this was annoying. thx for always talking to me <3

[credulouscanidae]

not to sound like an influencer doing a sponsorship but man....hello/fresh has saved my life the last month

ive been giving it a go, and while the novelty has worn off a bit and im still battling some degree of executive dysfunction with cooking...i cannot even BEGIN to explain just how much it's helping me right now

i think the reason it works so well for me personally is that it eliminates every single hurdle i face when cooking. i get really overwhelmed at buying ingredients that may need to be used more than once (sauces, flavours etc) cuz i cant...plan out what meals i could use them for before they expire/perish.

also the idea of measuring things out, doing a lot of prep work and knowing exactly what to do adds to those little head blocks and it piles up to a feeling of impossibility etc.i waste so much money on perishables that expire and it's :/

so having pre-portioned ingredients, everything you have is what you need, has honestly given a spark back into cooking for me.

and i feel silly that i need this right now, cuz i should "just be able to cook" because i CAN cook. but the reality is that my depression and neurodivergence is quite uhhhhh life impacting at the moment. and ive gained so much weight, felt physically unhealthy/tired etc because i was at a stage where i could eat frozen pizzas and chips+pie or 2 min noodles every night. i started to crave fresh veggies and salads so badly, but i never bought them cuz they kept going off and theyre also very expensive ingredients for what they give me. same goes for flavours, where it can cost a lot for a bottle when you dont know if youre gonna finish it in time or like it etc, so you are less motivated to experiment with new flavours

this has been years and years of trying to eat better more consistently, and it seems that HF is finally something that is actually working for me.

a downside is that sometimes the cooking method is a bit inaccurate, but i also luckily have enough cooking skill to recognise and adapt it, so a lot of the cons to it hasnt been a dealbreaker for me yet.

again, ive probably just been riding some kinda high and man. i still feel extremely mentally ill lol, but i can feel the difference that a month of eating better has done for me. ive lost weight, have more energy, saved money (the meals are for 2 people so i get leftovers or 2 nights worth of food) and yeah....

i know this all sounds silly but even if it didnt save much money, i would pay that adhd tax because it's honestly changed my life for the better. not to mention ive also felt inspired to cook and i get to try new flavours which has also been cool! im not eating the same crap every night anymore.

just thought id...idk post some positivity for a change aaaaa

[xamaxenta]

Saw the post talking about colors and contrast--I can't wait to see how you apply this new knowledge! Franky, I already kinda wanna eat your artwork its so pleasantly smooth in execution (separate from the very lovely character design you indulge us all with). I don't know how else to describe it without sounding like a loonatic lol

Anyway!

A handy tip for contrast is to (briefly) render it black and white! If you can clearly determine all the important details without staring down the piece until your eyes cross, congrats! You've got contrast! Really helps bring a piece together and emphasize what you want the viewer to focus on.

That's how I can tell after it's said and done at least, cause color theory is a bitch and saturation it's unholy offspring.

Experimenting with just stark colors also helps for practice! Like a moody black and white piece with only one color to accent like it's Sin City or something.

Thank you!! I always feel like my artistic improvement and skill ceiling evolved late compared to other artists who are like 18 and have perfect anatomy

But then i remember 1. Not a race 2. The resources I had compared to them as a kid/teen were like “anime 101” books from barnes and noble and websites where artists even shared their work online ig twitter etc didnt exist or wasnt used like that yet

But because of my late skill improvement its frustrating bc i also don’t have the time to explore new stuff

I know about the greyscale/bw pre render technique its really important for compositions too, ive just rarely implemented it but now that ive seen this artist showcase how they process an idea im like oh it can be done like THAT so ill pick that method apart and force myself through my preassigned ceiling

Im also interested in finding more texture to play with idk itll be cool? I hope

Thank you for this and for your kind words and support 😭❤️ means so much to me

[royal-they]

hi so i kinda happened to fall in love with your art.....and i wanted to ask a few things!!! (if its ok!)

uhmm first of all how long did it take you to get that art style and perfection it etc etc?

also do you have any tips for anatomy? not big complex full body anatomy, just like...idrk honestly, some tips related to anatomy or hands or just the body that helped/help you?

and uh yeah if you just have any general tips on whatever to improve my art/art style i'll take litterally anything 😭

again, i love your art, i love what you make! keep doing what you do, you're awesome!!!! sending love and support <3

ah!! tysm <333!! thats so cool to hear!!!!!!!!!/gen

ive been drawing forever honestly. i've always been really into it. im fifteen so thatd be like 12 years. and obviously i wasnt always studying it super seriously or anything. idk. my art isnt perfect by any means. i just dont really post the shitty pieces lmao. i struggle with sm stuff and will be continuing to study probably till the day i cant hold a pencil anymore lol. (i draw too much, my hand hurts ;w;) its a never ending process and honestly thats why i love it sm.

as for anatomy i think the main thing to keep in mind is that anatomy and just drawing people in general is really hard. i heard this in this old video about how pixar used to do 3d animation is that the reason they didnt do animations of humans for so long is because we ourselves have very specefic ideas of what a human looks like. i think this also applies to art. which is a really long way of saying, trust the process.

i use photos personally! you can find a lot on pinterest but there are a couple things id keep in mind when it comes to photos people edit their bodies sometimes so their proportions so be careful, it will defeat the purpose of the study if the bodies inaccurate.

idk here are some that might be good for starting off. dancers and people like that are super helpful. remember to not to focus too much on the lines but more copying down the shapes,

for hands i would just look at your own hands and try to capture them quickly. i say quickly mainly bc i shake a lot lmao, maybe youre different. or you could just be smart and take a picture of your hand but im very lazy and dont like getting up to grab my phone.

for art style id just save stuff that inspire you. could be animations, comics, album covers, cool photos, just stuff that gives you like vibes. literally ANYTHING.

like, omg this is making me think of a cool idea rn!! save it! even if you cant execute it now you can always execute it in the future when your skills are more developed :)

style studies are also helpful! try copying art you like, seeing different peoples techniques however some things to keep in mind with this are

you might accidently copy down an artists mistakes or bad habits without realizing it so try to have some variety in your artists

dont post the art. some people are okay with tracing but the vast majority of artists dont like it and it makes them uncomfortable. so id just like keep it in your sketchbook or whatever :) better safe than sorry.

anyway ah this is so longgggg! sry im so bad at being concise lol. theres probably a lot of youtube videos that could help you with this stuff if you want more explanation. the channel ive been watching a lot in since this summer is sketches of shay. she makes a variety of stuff but her art studies and resources are also very helpful :)

Sketches of Shay - YouTube

[77ngiez-archive]

erm. smiles. chihiro izuru miu

chihio ^^

favorite thing about them i looove her intense care and love and passion for her work and the way she goes above and beyond for it. youve talked abt her themes and narratives a lot but like i feel like its sooo interesting that she genuinely loves her talent and continues living on after death because of the passion she holds for it .

least favorite thing about them transmisogyny

favorite line not a line specifically but her whole convo with hajime in dr2 drives me insane.

brOTP literally truly genuinely want her to be friends with izuru and also hajime. her and izuru are coding transfems. her and hajime i just find interedting bcz of the aforementiond dr2 convo

OTP FUJIMAKIII <3333 also i enjoy chifumi a fair amount (blame roob)

nOTP I HATE CHIMONDO I HATE CHISHIMARU I HATE CHISHIMONDO.they suck so bad with each other they pick at eeach orhers scabs (metaphortically)

random headcanon as a child believed fhat if she ate a watermelon seed then a watermelon would grow inside of her. she believed this up until like a year before hopes peak probablt

unpopular opinion genuinely one of the most important chatacters in the series

song i associate with them digital/physical heart by vane

favorite picture of them gonna seem sooo self absorbed for this but i rlly love the sprite edit i did of her a while back

IZUZU

favorite thing about them her themes and narratives !!! i adoooore the concept of taking control of your own life and leaving behind the "purpose" your creators made you for. she Fascinates me

least favorite thing about them how little screentime she gets.. i do love the moments we get in dr3 tho

favorite line let her be a girlboss!!!

brOTP izuru chihiro friend chip���…… :] also pls let her interact w hajime & the naegis i am begging on my hands and knees

OTP KAMUNAGA .AND KAMUKOMA. izuru when silly white-haired antagonists with belief systems deemed ridiculous by their classmates <3

nOTP dont like kamunami. sorry. i see the appeal i like the concept but the execution is not there. also i dont like her with makoto At All Ever (hinata/naegi cousinisms in my brain)

random headcanon when not using her talents she has little to no navigation skills lol

unpopular opinion this freak is a GIRL !!!!

song i associate with them kamippoi na/god-ish by pinocchio-p <3

favorite picture of them

yeah

MEEOO

favorite thing about them her ISSSSUEEES <3333

least favorite thing about them maintenance scene.

favorite line all those ch4 bits where she insisted that she was doing what she was doing for the greater good..

brOTP her and touko would be so fucking funny actually. girls with the weirdest beef. IDK i feel like her dynamic with kaede is vv interesting and also with shuichi.

OTP Oh You Know (irouma)

nOTP kiiruma go away

random headcanon at age 13 she didnt have acne and she thought she was a freak for it bcz every other 13 yo in school had acne and she cried into the mirror about it

unpopular opinion SHES NOT ANNOYING SHES NOT A CREEP SHES TRAAAAUUUMATIZEDDD

song i associate with them teratera by kuragep (i would have said miu by mcki-robyns p but it is literally written abt her so thats cheating rip)

favorite picture of them

loove this old unused trial cg from the demo version

[mekatrio]

i went to a sf6 local todayyyy 🔥🔥🔥🔥 log diary whatever abt below

first of all the venue was super chill, and also the tournament was FREE to join which was awesome 🔥 i wouldnt have joined if it wasnt free so im very glad it was cuz i wouldve regretted it if i hadnt played. there were 33 entrants which was p surprising, bc i didnt expect there to be so many ppl since it was a local + a weekday. but then again i dont really have a frame of reference for these events cuz the only other time i joined a local was like 2 years ago for ssbu. also the format was double eliminations (lose twice and ur out) + ft3.

so anyways i actually did pretty ok bc i actually won a match! my first match!! it was against an ed, i won 3-2. i lost the first set, i was p nervous, but then i locked in (lol) and won the next set.. it was 2-2, and in the final round, i even landed a perfect!!! im so happy about that ☺️ i think i did very good mixups.. it also helps that ive played like 8472847 eds in ranked recently

but then after that i lost my next two matches 😔💔 i didnt even take a single set from them which makes me so sad... the first of them (in winners bracket) was against a kimberly who ultimately ended up 3rd in the whole tourney. after that i lost to an aki. i am so.. DISSATISFIEDDDD WITH MYSELF... not in a terribly overbearing way but its just like ohh i wanted to keep playing. i love playing this game and i wanted to stay in..

as for my gameplay "mistakes" i fear i was too defensive too often. i played rather defensively to cover up my lack of skills, but in doing so it gave my opponents too many openings. like i was attacked low sooo often. and ofc i had my fair share of execution errors but thats nothing too new. well actually i was dropping combos that i dont usually drop when i play at home. ig i didnt warm up enough, and also im not super used to playing on different set ups, so thats something ill have to get the hang of.

surprisingly i wasnt too nervous when i was playing, which was something i was worried abt. cuz when i joined that smash local 2 years, i was soooo anxious the entire time, and then i just felt terrible after it. but here i felt completely fine 👍 i think its because 1.) ive made strides in overcoming my horrific anxiety disorder and 2.) i have played.... soooooooooo many online matches. like so many. that when i was playing there, every game was just like, mentally, "this is just another ranked match". what did made me slightly nervous was how INCREDIBLYYYY friendly everyone there was like omg. Wow. um. i went there w my brother and then this couple approached us and talked. and then they brought other people over and other people kept coming over and everyone was so nice and friendly that i was pretty overwhelmed but like in a good way. they were all really really really nice. i got a lot of compliments for being as good as i am considering ive only started 2 months ago (#ThePowerOfUnemployment) which is something im forcing myself to take to heart cuz like yeah im bummed out by my losses but like ITS OK... IVE JUST STARTED... THANK U EVERYONE.. cuz like ive said before im just like. super duper hard on myself lmao. but even top players make wrong calls like i do.. i just gotta polish up my execution 👍

but yeah although im tired and a bit overwhelmed and sad that i didnt win more, im really glad i went cuz i had a good time. i wish i had gone earlier, cuz knowing how nice this place was i would love to come here more, but i cant bc im leaving the country tomorrow lmao. but also i probably wouldnt have felt confident enough to play back when i was at a lower skill level. but yeah.. today is like, kinda my "last" day w sf6, bc ill be heading back home tmr aka ill no longer have access to my brothers setup + his leverless controller, both of which ive been using for the past 2 months. ill still have access to the game on steam via our family library, but im currently ranked silver on my own acc and i wont have a leverless back home sooo itll kinda be a soft reset of sort. ntm im gonna be quite busy these coming weeks so i probably wont be playing sf6 for a while. maybe ill play some last few games of ranked tomorrow before my flight but ill see.. but yeah ill use this time to write a "review" of sorts for this game that took over my life for the past 2 months ☺️✌️ i love ❤️ sf6

[two-bit-socrates]

Oh the sub narration is solid compared to what I remember from the dubs. Makes more sense that Roger wanted one more heist before his execution so he said something to send everyone scrambling. I wonder if he was thinking of Ace.

oh shit luffy sounds like naruto

Luffy is me on a spiritual, mechanical, and intellectual level.

Did they Alivida the most sphrecal of curves because that wanted a way to convey her strength or did they think it would make her unflattering cause jokes on you im in to that shit!

luffy is my kind of creative thinker - lemme sail the open seas with an enchanted disability that paralyzes me when im submerged in water with any sense of shipmate skills oh hey theres a whirlpool of death. hmm well i have a barrel guess this my ship for now yeeeeeeeeeee

Luffy: Im going to be king of the pirates because i want to!

Me: Cause Baby, Im an anarchist, you're a spineless liberaaaaaaaaal!

Coby: My dream worth dying for is to join the navy and catch bad guys!!!!!!!

Me: But when it came to throw bricks thru that starbucks window you left me all alone all alonnnnnnnnnneee

My dream worth striving for is Making The Way to The Better World and if I should fall short of that then A Better World Is Possible Regardless. No matter how you spend your time in your life the time is spent just the same either way.

When she asked Who is the most beautiful pirate Coby should of said Luffy

Whomst amongst us has not eaten of the devil's fruit have you seen them?

THAT A BOY COBY PUT YOUR CUNT INTO IT

I GOTTA SAY AS A RUBBER MAN ITS EXTREMELY FORTUOTUS that he got that scar in advance before eating the fruit oh wait didnt he cut himself on purpose just to have a pirate scar damn son lol

anime is what watching weed is for

I like how luffy is like, go on coby go live your lib shit dreams!!

oh god i'd kill for a terrifying demon pirate hunter rn luffy man i dont blame you <3

OF COURSE HE GETS A SICK GUITAR RIFF

[polymonochrome]

.....oh my shit....

I wasnt here for a while eh?..damn..like im gonna leave some life updates here...like today i just went through my oldest tumblr accounts...i was quite immature and dumb at that time with my shit social skills , overall , art skills as bad as a sans fangirl dumbness and not not understanding english nicely and i did some shit mistakes before ..i improved though i grew up .. definetly have improved art , writing and even my jsab aus ! Its both shit and great here! ..i am incredibly sorry to everyone who followed this and everyone who was close to me in this app this kinda sounds like it but im not leaving tumblr or the jsab fandom ...just trying to restart instead of abandone

This was a really weird way to come back but i just needed to get it out , thank you all

Here is some jsab art i never posted !

Yeaah..i want to restart again now but i dont wanna do whatever weird half assed shit i did before. I have ideas for a plan but i dont know when i'll execute or even prepare but it might involve new accounts ( which reminds me , i changed accounts so many fucking times it reminds me of my own life but worse and cringe ) im not sure if i'll tell it anyone tho but still seriously thank you for being in this non existent, insignificant , and something you didnt even know your part of kind of journey lol

[scrivenger-grimgar]

oh, i dont think i'll change the cannibalism, shen yuan is going to be resigned to some things just happening but restricting him to woods town criminals, people causing problems, but thats after they both know they're married? qi rong stops eating people specifically to impress shen yuan, and it does, but shen yuan is like "yeah criminals i usually personally execute if they causing problems so i guess you can eat them, but let me kill em first" (aka the nobleman and his guard company lol).

i feel like shen yuan has a few strict rule and the rest are flexible.

if shi wudu tries to get shen yuan to shift shi qingxuan's fate he would refuse, not only bc he its not right but bc he can't. what he does is give people hints on what to do or not do, so his epithet is actually wrong, people only think he can directly interfere with fate.

shi wudu didnt even give shen yuan a name or location, so now shen yuan is just hunting down every reverend of empty words which takes decades even with hc's help.

so unfortunately the he xuan is still a calamity, and shi qingxuan does still ascend as the wind master. but their brother's behaviour after meeting with shen yuan tells them that something is wrong, so they're a lot more quietly shrewd and suspicious, and even more so when they learn from ling wen that gods from the same family AND generation are unheard of. so at some point shi qingxuan hears about the calamity can can change fates and goes to see him to see if anything weird was up with their fate going from bad to good.

so thats how shi qingxuan learns that their brother sucks and befriends shen yuan and figures out that ming-xiong is a ghost, so then shen yuan has to be mediate between he xuan and shi qingxuan while they figure everything out.

sqx just like "yeah, you could kill my brother, but consider: we work together to lessen his influence and force him into the lower court as humiliation, then we get married and you get to mock him as much as you want while i pretend to be oblivious and make things even worse for him!"

he xuan just falls so fucking hard for her after hearing her say that. sy being their councillor like "your fiance would want you to be happy, and if qingxuan-meimei makes you happy, she would be happy too."

sy and xl have never met before so xl gets three different first impressions mostly bc he thinks that hua cheng, shi qingxuan, and ling wen are all talking about different people.

ling wen tells of the dangerous fourth calamity, green silk weaving fates, able to bind gods in nothing but spider webs and cut them limb from limb with razor-like threads, not to mention his sharp tongue and skillful wordplay.

shi qingxuan talks about qingsi-ge, and how he's an incredible immortal artisan who creates all of their best clothes and how xl should absolutely commission him for some better quality robes because they'll last so much longer and be in the exact cut and style you want!

[qing si bian yun = green; silk; to weave; fate] [qingsi = fine black hair]

and then hua cheng who just like "oh thats my dumbass named shen yuan who helps figure out wtf is happening just in general. we have book club tea parties on the fourth weekday and sometimes we paint silk fans together, but he's not important."

the fourth impression is actually meeting him, where qi rong is causing trouble and hua cheng calls shen yuan to collect his creature of a man, and he drags qi rong out by his scruff while he's shouting profanities. he is given a silk muzzle very quickly. that is quite unfortunately a reward for qi rong even when it isn't meant to be.

the fifth impression is yin yu muttering incoherently, trying to clean up the remains of a brainstorming session from three calamities trying to figure out why tf theres weird shit happening for no reason.

also: ming yi, the weirdo architect, who really didn't want to ascend handing his divinity over to he xuan so he can work construction in ghost city. ming yi may or may not be shang qinghua. shang qinghua who never read tgcf, doesn't even know what the plot is, he's just kinda there maybe.

svsss x tgcf crossover where shen yuan is so dedicated to making sure his blorbos get everything they deserve.

shen yuan dies cursing out pidw as normal but he ends up in tgcf.

the book was his meimei's favorite and they both read each others favorites so they could yell about them together. he did not expect to end up loving this danmei so much, and shi qingxuan was his queer reality check. did he figure out that he was aroace-spec from relating to xie lian? yes. does he want to talk about it? no.

when he dies cursing out pidw he SHOULD have ended up there, but there was a glitch in the system and he ended up in a little village in tgcf. he knows all the plot points and character names, but he doesn't know where or when he is in the plot and he really wants to give his blorbos everything they deserve but he is a toddler.

so he just,,, lives. he knows he wont be able to cultivate, his family can't afford to send him to a sect, and his village doesn't have much outside of the basics. so when his family caught him teaching other kids abd realized that shen yuan could read? AND write?? AND do math!!?? well...

"meng po said i didnt need any soup." becomes the first lie he tells. he is so glad he retained his resting bitch face.

they think he might ascend as some legendary civil god. shen yuan knows he wont. and he doesnt.

his days are spent teaching other children, learning from the village craftsmen, listening to the brothel jiejies play music, panicking about his blorbos, and planning.

in his teens he becomes the village's official teacher, and officially apprentices under a cloth weaver and learns to make paper and ink.

part of him tells himself that he's learning these things ti help his family, another part says its to keep his mind off the plot.

his second death is uneventful, mostly because nobody actually realizes that he's dead. his parents were old, and his elder sister already married out, so he lived alone for 5 years already. dead at 27 due to a house fire, yet his soul is already strong enough to be wrath.

he comes to the very fair assumption that its simply due to his status not as a reincarnator, but as a millenial. the sheer amount of depression and existential dread he faced as a physically disabled terminally ill millenial in the corporate hell that is the post capitalist corporate purgatory primed his being as one that simply cultivated resentment like a finely aged wine.

but he so geniunely enjoyed teaching and learning that he just. never told anyone that he was dead. it completely slipped his mind as unimportant because he knows that ghosts in this world are just humans a bit to the left, and since he is still the same person as before, is just as much of a ghost as he was before, knows that he can still teach and learn the same as before. it doesn't change anything for him.

he just picks up his ashes, apprentices himself to the village potter, makes himself a new tea set, and weaves a beatiful tapestry dedicated to the only god who can truly do no wrong, yushi huang.

he continues teaching and learning, and genuinely caring for his village, carefully, carfully making sure he does not hurt his people, making sure he does not scare them.

the way his people discover he is a ghost is not pretty, but neither is it ugly.

a nobleman was in town to rest the night with his entourage of guards. one young lady working the local brothel is harrassed by the guards, so nervous she trips and spills wine on the young master.

the nobleman, covered in wine, tipsy and enraged, grabs her and throws her to the ground, yelling at her to grovel and apologise; he does not notice the hateful gaze of shen yuan, once playing a delicate tune only moments before.

shen yuan wants to stop this, but that would definitely reveal him as more than human. the choice is taken from him as this stranger has the gall to step on one of his own students, he feels his patience snap in the stunned silence of the entertainment hall.

faster than possible for any mortal, he stands by them, holding the nobleman by the front of his stupid fancy robes, panicked babbling about that bitch having her man-whore friend doom himself to suffer both their fates. one of the guards stabs shen yuan through the chest.

there is screaming as the village's beloved teacher is run through, even as he ignores the wound and drags the nobleman from the building, the guards running after them. shen yuan takes the entire group out to the forest with only the nobleman as bait, and uses the silence if the night as a backdrop for the unrelenting slaughter of 15 people.

when he returns, he is covered in blood, carrying everything they had on them. the word has spread. their teacher is something else. but that wasn't nesicarily bad. the nobleman's rescources are stripped of identity and spread amongst the villagers. shen yuan has not harmed them, only stepping in when one of them was in harm's way. they have known him for 30 years, they know he is nothing if not kind.

so he protects them. because they have always been his family. so for centuries he does. he watches his peers as they grow old and die, caring after their children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. he is their teacher. he is their uncle. he is their ---.

there was a period of time where the town thought shen yuan took on a heveanly tribulation only to reject godhood and return to the village. shen yuan tried to tell people that wasn't true, that he never became a god or refused godhood, that he was simply trapped in a mountain for a decade, stewing in a pot of resentment and accidentally becoming a ghost king.

he doesnt even know how he did that, just that apparently yoyos are similar enough to meteorhammers that he could apply the same concepts, and also that he had enough condenced rage and nerdiness to actually figure out anime moves with qi. so what if half of the ghosts in the kiln thought he was some kind of spider demon, he has cool threads that he can use to kill you.

and actually fuck you, spiders are pretty damn cool!

it starts not long after that. the prayers. his people are praying to him, as if he's some kind of god.

thats when he realizes. he can pray to the gods. he can pray to the gods, and they will only ever know the temple it came from. and really he's spent so long worrying over not just his blorbos but also his whole village, and really what is he if not an anonymous millenial internet troll.

and so it begins.

[5-htagonist]

prologue written after the fact: psychology being a special interest (and also sociology but lesser) gives me a disturbing level of insight to my behaviors. the process of TRULY unmasking is really ahhhhh well they werent playing around when they said its hard cause its not JUST social u do it to yourself you do and thats why it really hurts

i think there is something really ummm confusing for me... about like... the way i acquire knowledge.... that is like. Deep Cut audhd-related trait. where there is like a pretty big discrepancy i think btwn my acquired knowledge on my subjects of interest and my like. Ability to execute according to everything i know. idk i think that shit is connected to the fact i could read super early but i didnt understand it and i didnt Know that i didnt understand it until i was like.... 16/17.. my level of understanding was just so far below the things i was drawn to...? like idk if i know MORE or LESS than anyone else per se cause like thats not how that works. but my recall goes crazy. but even still i have trouble Connecting The Dots i guess. in a very deep way that im not sure non autistic people really understand. And That Makes It Hard To Communicate................................... *HOLE IN DA DRYWALL!!!!!!!!!*

atp i feel like my knowledge vs skill gap is much smaller. i have a very easy time doing "grade level" stuff, whereas even in like. history i was mostly just guessing and TBH i still cant remember names of most figures lol but whateva but i used to have a lot of trouble ordering events...

and like. alexithymia ... i dont think the Definitions accurately describe.... like... how it is. i have to make conscious effort to take note of physical signs of how im feeling (bc like, stress will make u tense, or depression will make me have no energy, etc) or my social battery will run out and i wont notice and ill either pass out or get irritable. and more often than not it doesnt occur to me WHY i feel the need to behave like either a bhole or a lump. although adderall helps a lot with that to be honest.....

ALL THIS TO SAY IM PISSED THAT I find it difficult to write due to that common sense of perfectionism

[chappell-roans]

sorry for making this so long lol... studios dont exactly have a good track record of understand the internet and good marketing. someone tweeted something about "executives saying to not trust artists because theyre not business people is ironic considering they re-released morbius in theatres" and I agree.

the best marketing to tap into fandoms in recent years was, funnily enough, venom. They say people really like the Eddie/venom dynamic, both ironically and unironically, and totally leaned into the romantic angle both playing it seriously and for a laugh. But even then, it was more that they understood what people were saying (also a very good skill) rather than them being able to predict what fandoms like and would be popular. morbius was never so bad its good like other movies, people 1, didnt like Leto, and 2, the joke was the it was failing and bad which they didn't get.

among other reasons, these people worked for a long time in order to be at the top and get hired by the biggest businesses in the game, the downside is that theyre old and out of touch with fandoms which are largely comprised of younger people and whose tastes really influence the non fandom market too. part of the problem is also that they aren't enmeshed in the market theyre marketing too.

there was a really long video on YouTube talking about the icarly show, and the youtuber pointed out that the show was really ahead of its time and not only really understood the internet but also predicted how it would evolve. but the internets changed a lot and the revival hasn't really caught up.

that is very interesting and the icarly point as well. it really is something you're either enmeshed in, or on the outside of. because fandom and moneymaking can go hand-in-hand, but it doesn't always. it can be kinda antithetical (morbius, new icarly) versus barbenheimer. you raise some really really interesting points here and i'll be thinking about it for sure. like they just kinda can be taken by the tide of public opinion really popularly or Not

[league-of-thots]

YeeHawks

Pairing: Hawks x female reader

Word Count: 3.3k+

Warnings: 18+, alcohol, riding, is cowboy kink a warning?

A/N: not the way y’all wanted me to return, but the way y’all deserve lol. i didnt really have the energy to give it an in depth edit but sometimes it be like that

         You wipe the sweat from your brow, the sun is high in the bright, cloudless sky. It means that the heat is just pouring down in waves from the sky though, and you curse the fact that you’d agreed to switch shifts with one of the other farmhands that had asked you the day before. Part of you wants to find Kirishima and reem him out, but you know he’s a sweetheart and wouldn’t have ever done something that would make things harder for you on purpose.

         Having said that, imagining giving the man a piece of your mind makes it easier for you to grit your teeth and put your back into heaving large packets of grains into a wheelbarrow for the pigs, so that you wouldn’t have to make as many trips. Instead, it would just be one hellish trip, and a lot less walking in the heat.

         Wiping the stray dirt on your pants you sigh. You feel sticky and can feel the grit on your face, on your arms. You must smell something fierce, though you know compared to the pigs you’d be feeding in a few minutes, you smelt like a bed of flowers.

         You feel the strain on your back as you finally finish loading the wheelbarrow and start to haul it over to the south side of the Academy farm. The ground is rough, and you feel the jarring of the weight in your shoulders, you’re going to be so sore tomorrow.

         After you finish feeding the pigs, you take the supplies back to where they belong and head off to start some of your final tasks of the day. One is milking the cows, and the other being your favourite, plowing some of the dirt to prepare for the new season.

         Is it a bit stupidly cliché that you love riding the big tractor while the sun lowers in the sky? Maybe. Is it worth it? Absolutely. It’s one of the best views you’ve seen in your life. Plus, it always helps clear your mind from a day of hard work so that when you enter one of the farmhouses, you’re ready to do whatever else you need to get done.

         When you park the tractor back to its spot in the barn, you see a few of the other farmhands talking together. They’re laughing with one another, and you wave to them as you walk out with your overcoat and keys.

         You’re in a daze until you realize you’ve somehow already started up a warm shower, standing under the steam to relieve your body from the stress of the day. Your muscles feel so much better with the hot water on them and the steam makes you feel as if you’re in stasis. It’s good because tomorrow is going to be a big day, the August festival, a celebration that the community holds as a sort of last hurrah before the season gets busy once again.

         After you’re clean and put together, you head downstairs to have a quick conversation with the couple other farmhands that share the house with you. You need to check if there’s anything else you need to do to help with the final preparations for tomorrow. The four of you had made some homebrew cider to share with the other townspeople, and it tasted quite good, despite being a little heavy on the alcohol. But nobody would be complaining about that, of course.

         “Mmm, I think its fine.” Mina says, faced scrunched up in thought. “We did pretty well with it for sure.”

         “I agree,” you reply. “Just wanted to make sure I could pass out for the night. I’m fucking dead.” She laughs a little at that.

         “Gotta make sure you have the energy for tomorrow. I hear that it’s going to be extra wild.” She waggles her eyebrows. “You know that there’s going to be a horse-ridin’ performance from our sheriff’s department, but there’s also gonna be some cowboys over here to show off some of their skills too.”

         You’re slightly intrigued at that. Maybe, you’ll even get to see him again… but, better not get your hopes up too much. Instead, you say, “That would definitely be a treat for all the hard work that this year’s been.”

         Mina nods sagely at that. “If I see that blonde, twink of a cowboy I’m goin’ to make him my bitch. Because I deserve it.” That brings a snort out of you, but you pray a little for Denki if you do see him tomorrow, because lord knows he’s going to need it.

         The two of you chat for a little while longer before you wish her a good night and head up to get some rest. You do have a busy day to get ready for after all.

           You wake up early the next day, ready to quickly get your tasks done so you can let loose with friends and community members that night. You wish that you don’t have to do any work, but you can’t have everything you want.

         So, you drag yourself out of bed, muscles tight and body sore, to quickly grab a protein bar and a cleaner pair of working clothes. Your overalls are starting to sport holes and there are some dark stains that just won’t ever come off. You need new ones, you think, as you walk towards the horse pen.

         You love the horses, how sweet most of them are and how peaceful it is in their separated area. It’s especially nice in the early morning, with a crisp breeze and the sun peeking out on the horizon. You grab the feed mix that someone had mixed the day before and drag it over to the troughs, where there are already some of the animals waiting for you to arrive. The horses have learned to expect people in the morning, and some of the more assertive ones wait at the fence to be the first ones to get to eat.

         While they feed, you prepare the cleaning tools inside the small stable that is connected to the fenced off pen. You take each horse that’s finished eating into the small shelter to clean their hooves, brush out their mane and body, and then your favourite part, riding them for a few laps of the enclosure to make sure they run a bit each day.

         It’s while you’re dismounting a cute mare named Starlight when you hear a low whistle from behind you. Someone’s obviously been watching you, and sitting there just outside the enclosure.

“Damn, baby, wonder if you could ride me as good as those horses there.” You feel a vein ticking in your head as you recognize the voice. He’s supposed to be getting ready for the group event, not bothering you while you try to get some fucking work done before you can finally relax and celebrate.

         You turn your body and inwardly groan as your suspicions are confirmed, sitting there waiting is a certain cowboy who’s always managed to piss you off greatly every time one of his short visits brings him to the UA farms.

         “Hello, Hawks.” You grit your teeth as you move towards the next horse that you’re about to take care of.

         “I’m wounded, really, that you don’t sound pleased ta see me, angel.” There’s a satisfied smirk on his face. He really does get off on toying around with you and seeing how much he can piss you off. So, you take a deep breath and calm yourself.

         “Now, why would you expect anything different? I haven’t forgotten the last time you came aroun’-“

         He waves you off. “You’re bein’ ridiculous. It was a harmless joke.”

         “I had to clean the stables for TWO WEEKS.” He just laughs at your anger, totally unphased. It grinds your gears more, the cheeky grin on his face that charms everyone around him, whittling down your intense irritation.

         “Well, if anythin’ everyone else certainly enjoyed it.” You grumble out some choice words about him, making sure they’re loud enough for him to here, as you start brushing out the mane of the mare in front of you. He seems pleased with himself, leaning on the fence, head on his hands.

         “Do you not have somewhere to be? Something you should be practicing for?” He lazily waves away your attempts to get him away from the work you’d like to finish up.

         “Who needs practice? I know exactly what I’ve gotta do so there’s no real reason for me to waste my energy before the actual performance.” He says it with a casual arrogance, that you know comes from years of experience and absolute confidence in his abilities. “The only thing I wanna do right now is try all of the good I know y’all made for the party tonight.”

         You give him an unimpressed look. “Just because we know each other does not mean that I’m going to just give you the cider meant for the community.” He pouts “You can try it when everyone else does later.”

         “Yeah, but we have a special connection.” He grins and you splutter, embarrassed and trying to put away the memories of your bodies pressed together and calloused fingers in your cunt.

         “Jesus, Hawks. Shut up.” You look around furtively, checking to see if anyone would’ve overheard.

         “You like me loud.” God, his smug look makes you feel hot and bothered.

         “Get outta here so I can finish my work, damn it.” He just laughs, turning around before turning back.

         “You better save me some of the goodies y’all made up for after the performance.”

         “Yeah, whatever,” you grumble, face flushed and mind now distracted with memories of Hawks’ hands tangled in your hair.

           “Well, now. This is delicious.” Your eyes follow his tongue that darts out to lick the drop of the cider that had dripped onto his lips. You’d made sure to fill a plate up with the treats that had been spread around the outdoor tables, lanterns hung up around them not only for ease of finding them, but also to light up the evening. “You helped make this?”

         “Yup. You wouldn’t believe how difficult it was between never having done it before and Mina’s enthusiasm. God bless Momo, without her we wouldn’t have gotten it done.” He laughs, and you can’t help that you can’t keep your eyes off of him.

         He was slightly sweaty from his earlier performance, which had been perfectly executed, tank top tucked into worn jeans with a feather-like buckle. His eyes are scanning the crowd around as the two of you lean on the outside of the saloon, the inside being too filled with inebriated or high adults to even try to squeeze into a seat.

         “So, how’s life been around here since I last visited?” he asks between bites of some spicey brisket, obviously enjoying it.

         “Ah, not much. Just the usual social drama. Actually, Shinsou almost got his dick sliced off by some machinery someone had fucked around with. I swear to god that man has the worst luck I’ve ever seen.”

         “Holy shit, sure does sound like it.”

         “But yeah, it’s just living day to day for me now. Not much new happens out here, as you very well know.” He shrugs.

         “Might as well see. What’s even keeping you here, then?”

         “Not everyone needs to be on the road their whole life to be happy, Hawks.”

         “I suppose. More cider?”

         “Sure.”

           You’ve drank way too much, you know that. But the fuzziness in your head just makes you want to keep going, to have fun and make up for all the time you lose working long hours every day.

         Besides, Hawks is there beside you, egging you on and matching you drink for drink. His hands always seem to be on your body, either squeezing your ass, wrapped around your shoulders or waist. It makes you feel warm, and you know he’s teasing you, trying to rile you up. He wants to see how bothered he can make you before you snap and drag him off to some private place.

         You’re determined to beat him out though. So, you lean into his body space and trace your hands over his arms, the insides of his wrists. You hear his breath hitch, though his attention is kept on whatever conversation is happening in front of you.

         Of course, this is Hawks, who has just as much patience as a saint, despite being as far from one as possible. But you’re drunk and turned on and the teasing is too much for you to handle, so when there’s a brief pause in the activity around the two of you, you pull him down so you can whisper in his ear how much you want him.

         He grins, “Might as well head back to your place then.” You agree and drag him with you.

         The moment you’re in the house, you wrap your arms around his neck so you can bring his lips to yours. Its messy and rushed, but it’s relieving at the same time. The two of you have done this enough in the few times that he passes through that he’s comfortable enough to let you take charge for a bit.

         “You can’t even wait ‘til we’re upstairs, sugar?” he chuckles, drawing out each word. You feel the rumble of them, pressed up as you are against his chest.

         “Shut up, Hawks.” You grumble, pulling him towards your room if that’s what it’ll take to get his dick out faster.

         After rushing in the room, you kick the door shut behind you and immediately get back to kissing him. This time, he makes more of an effort to assert himself, holding your face in his hands and licking into your mouth. You sigh into him, your hands finding his heated skin beneath his shirt as the pace slows down from the frantic rush it had been. It becomes sensual, and you can feel him getting more aroused as he slowly shifts his hands, starting to grind into you.

         You pull away from him, getting some air as you start to take off his shirt. He enthusiastically moves to help and you get to admire his muscles stretch as he does. Obviously, life constantly on the road does wonders for your abs.

         “You too, sugar. You’re gonna make me feel underdressed.” He says as he moves to take off the rest of his garments. A laugh slips out of you as you hastily get out of your outfit. When you turn your attention back to him, he’s sitting on the bed and he gestures for you to join him.

         When you do, he kisses you again, intensely, as he guides you onto your back. You sigh as he kisses down the side of your jaw to mark your neck, reaching blindly for the lube and condoms beside the bed.

         He quickly slides it on and you hear the squelching of lube as he moves in a rush. You don’t have time to make fun of him though, because as soon as he’s finished, he spreads your legs and puts the head of his dick at your entrance.

         He groans, closing his eyes as he enters you, and its uncomfortable for a little bit. Soon enough though, you relax, and start to feel great as he moves his hips slowly against you. Hawks fucks deeply, you know this from your times before, but each time it feels just as tantalizing as the last.

         “Hawks, please.” You pant, trying to wiggle a little bit just to get some friction, some tiny relief for the edging you’ve been through. He just gives you a smirk, as he keeps you completely locked between him and the mattress. You tense so hard he groans on top of you, but he doesn’t let you move, dick still sitting snug inside your cunt.

         “Well, let’s see those barebacking skills you were showin’ off earlier then, hmm?” he says, his voice low and gruff. With ease, he gets the both of you turned around so you’re now sitting with your ass on his thighs, hands clamped tight on your waist keeping you in place while he lays back on the headboard. He nods satisfactorily, looking you up and down with lidded eyes. “Y’know, I like this view much better, baby. What a pretty picture you make right on top of me.” Part of you wants to roll your eyes, but the warmth that his words give you makes the impulse disappear.

         “You know, Hawks, in order for me to show you said skills, you’re going to have to let me move.” He laughs as you try and lift yourself against the pressure he’s putting, obviously unable to really do anything. “Seriously, you dick, lemme move.”

         “But the face you make when I play these little games with you is so cute, sugar.” He’s got a faux innocent smile across his face and you pout and cross your arms in response. “Okay, okay, I’m done. I promise,” he says, letting off all the pressure, but keeping the two of you connected at the hips.

         “Thank you.” you quip, starting a quicker pace than the one Hawks had been setting, gravity still making it just as deep as before.

         Being drunk obviously makes Hawks that much louder, or maybe it’s the change up in position, you can’t be sure. But, his praises, his deep moans, the lewd noises from the slapping of your body against his hips, it all makes you feel hot as hell.

         You look down, seeing Hawks’ eyes widened and excited, he grins when he notices your look and begins to rock up into you. You throw your head back in as he hits deep within you, crying out his name. Hearing it obviously enthuses him as he grunts in exertion, starting to thrust upwards harder, and you feel your body responding, muscles tightening as you get closer to your climax.

         “God, you’re gorgeous like this, y’know?” he gets out through gritted teeth. “I’m not going to be able to last much longer…” He’s panting, fingers digging into your hips sharply, sure to leave marks.

         “Please, I wanna cum Hawks!”

         “Tell me what you need, sugar, I’ll give it to you.” Hearing that makes you smile, he was always so attentive to your needs.

         “Touch me…”

         “You gotta tell me where for that.” Even when so close to his climax, somehow, Hawks manages to be cheeky. However, when he’s fucking you this well, it’s much easier to let the teasing roll off your back.

         “My clit, Hawks. You do know what that is, right?” He lets out a genuine laugh at that, before sending one hand down towards the bundle of nerves.

         It’s enough, between the stimulation and the deep thrusts into your cunt, that you feel yourself tighten and cry out, cumming hard onto his cock. You lean into him, kissing him hard as pleasure courses through your body.

         He works you through it, breathing heavily, you can feel his pulse skittering under your hands. You feel him twitch within you, and an idea forms in your mind. Mind wrapped up in pleasure, you act on the thought immediately, bringing your hands to his chest to play with his nipples.

         He loves it, making keening noises as you work, legs shaking with effort to stay up and keep pace with him. You let him take the lead and you hear him shout and arch up as you pinch his buds, feeling him release.

         He thrusts a couple more times, lazily and slowly, kissing the top of your head as you settle down to lie on his chest for a few minutes.

         You breath deeply, content in the moment. You know after you clean up and rest, he’ll be gone on the road once again, so you relax, enjoying the presence.

[marzipanilla]

idk how into(if at all) you are to actual plays, but that comment immediately made me think 'ah yes cave water! your favorite meal' Dimension20 is a gift when I have the focus for it... (I drink a lot of water mostly lol)

Your mom was empress of a planet that went through a major disaster and the only thing you can express about her is that she loved your dad? I think your depth of understanding is horribly limited there, kid, or you were kept so insanely sheltered !! Did they just keep his ass in the palace and not let him see the world?? What if Mark tried to retroactively tell him about the destruction and he refused to believe him?? He was shown being out among the bodies when Mark got recovered !! did you think everyone was covered in paint, like seriously wtf.

I keep staring at the puddles of world building waiting for them to drop into deep wells and its just an inch of shiny oil on gravel like. You dont have to get into but you can reference stuff! Mark claimed Cecil protected him from seeing the extent of the damage, extend that!! There WAS a court case, but Cecil had it thrown out/made it so the government wouldn't press charges bc he needed Mark on his side in case his dad came back!! just !! so many solutions !! He put Damien into hell for daring to threaten to expose what Nolan had done, he can toss a fucking court case.

lol Mark just having a full jar of assorted teeth would be something. Debbie having to stop doing tooth fairy shit and come up w some reason why they wont leave him money anymore lol

A good bit of reality distortion/mind control is fabulous!! tricks to snap them out of it, emotional appeals to snap them out of it... people acting in odd ways not just bc of what they're doing but suddenly reacting to other characters than the ones everyone expected!! why are you so extra vicious to this person you didnt seem to have much interaction w... why is this other capable of calming you down but not the one you say is important to you... mff. tasty.

Yeah Nolan getting hero worshiped and turned into their ruler is brushed over way too damn quick. like sir. Not only do I think you lack any skills to lead an actual population, you agreed to that. 'it was nice to have a purpose again'. You can help them out without being their fucking boss. Just like Immortal, this bitch doesn't know how to say no. I do think he has a 'cant go back/will never see her again' thought process re: Debbie, but like... if you hadn't been taken by the viltrumites, either they never showed up or he and Mark were successful, once a little more time had passed... How long until he would have had the same I miss her thought? What was your actual relationship w Andressa like?? why did you fucking agree to it?? we get 1 kiss, 1 hug, and 1 time he says her name in an annoyed tone of voice. like sir. I definitely have a big split re: some canon deviations between comic and show for Thraxa, but the show is really just like 'incredibly depressed man fucks president of his fan club accidentally knocks her up' and its just like... how much of that relationship were you just thinking about Debbie? how fucked up is that for Andressa?? If Mark had been on Thraxa with him longer, how long would it have taken for Debbie to come up again?? What the fuck did Nolan actually say about his previous family bc quite frankly what Andressa says just raises more fucking questions.

And these people, just like on Earth, never experienced anything bad from him until the day he fucked off and wasnt seen again like. Nolan really does avoid negative fallout in social situations so hard. He is so fucked up about what happened that he wants to be ritually executed, and that is a mood- but I need to see him stuck around the actual people he directly hurt. for more than one fucking day, or like, half a day in the case of Mark on Thraxa.

Allen's first stop after busting out w Nolan is getting him a chastity belt lol 'have you ever heard of condoms??' Mark seemed pretty beat up about you having another kid and I dont want him sad next time I talk to him..

No lie I almost wrote 'Nolan depression fucks his way across the galaxy and has like, 5 kids when he runs into Debbie again' into a story before deciding I just didn't want to deal w it even tho I could see it happening lol

Yeah. I wonder how much of that divide is related to 'want to chars to have nice things' and 'want my char to suffer horribly' but whump is its own thing and precious cinnamon-roll too good for this world does get the shit beat out of them plenty too. idk, the infinite wonders and variety of life I guess.

Mark agreeing to go hang out on a beach w Debbie instead of refusing and the beach is Beach City (am now officially thinking too much about this crossover lol)

The way I got caught up on our back and forth I almost forgot this, lol! AND OH MY GOODNESS, IMAGINE? I forget exactly what which point Debbie makes the beach offer, but I’d love when exactly in SU/SUF-timeline they’d go? There’s something so fucking funny to me about them going during the SUF-timeline and always narrowly missing the strange, Steven-shaped mental breakdowns in the back. I know those don’t occur in a single day, but it’s tickling me. How could they miss anything? I don’t know I just think it’s funny.

Though, post-SUF is interesting if Gems can see the similar “world on your shoulders”, Mark has going on! Steven can shunt the narrative in the Gems’ minds, which I think is neat, if I’m not misusing the phrase since the guy’s on the road far away. Or maybe it’s just before Steven goes and they stumble into each other. I’d kinda love Pearl and Debbie interacting, honestly, if they could talk about loving someone who hurt you, hide things from you, even when you thought you knew them so deeply, and they left you to raise a child. Pearl being in a well adjusted space, and Debbie still grieving.

Honestly, the gems could help train Mark, they’re got experience and similar-ish powers in strength, sturdiness, and they can jump/run fast enough for flying to be vaguely similar enough to lecture about, I think. Or Lapis Lazulis, haha! Peridot with her trash can lid! Garnet, I’d love to see if she told Mark anything about his future in vague, well meaning advice. Or even giving relationship advice considering Amber. Or, importantly, how to convince an entire reign to end their colonizing ways, lol. Is Mark perhaps willing to start a war, take advantage of being related to any leaders, or fake his own death to varying results?

In general, there’s something so fucking funny to me about Nolan, in the sake of comparison, being Pink Diamond coded. Like OH, did an important or well respected of the colonizing empire come to earth and learn the beauty of its people and nature, including faking/lying/omitting things about his identity and background to being in, only to feel conflicted when his responsibility still remained, and he tried to free himself from them? Yikes! We’ve been through that before! Like gimme Pink Diamond and Nolan outfit swap rn. This is tickling me so much oh my goodness.

[chongoblog]

Zero Time Dilemma Review/Ramble

Okay, so if you’ve been following me, you know that I’ve gotten into the Zero Escape series, famous for 999 and Virtue’s Last Reward, streaming both games. I recently took the time to experience the last game, Zero Time Dilemma by watching cutscenes rather than playing it proper mostly because A) I heard it was REALLY dark and didnt want to risk it on Twitch and B) I wanted to experience it more freely like while I’m at work.

After experiencing it. I have......feelings about it. And because there’s MASSIVE spoilers involved, I’m making it its own post under the ReadMore below.

tl;dr LOADS of bullshit, flawed execution, and stupid decisions, but still REALLY enjoyed it

Okay so a LOT of this is going to be complaining, and like I said in the tl;dr I still legit enjoyed this game, so I’m gonna make this a compliment sandwich by saying something nice now, loading up on complaints, then ending with more compliments. Carlos is good. So is Sean. Sigma being voiced by Matthew Mercer actually makes him more interesting imo. I REALLY like Phi’s new design and the way they build on the initial concepts brought up in VLR more accurately portray the ideas that started all the way back in 999, that being the idea of taking thoughts across timelines, just like the player. From the beginning, the theme/gimmick was always “what if your character remembered information when you savescummed?” In 999 that began as flashes of information, and in VLR the characters’ consciousness actually time traveled at the very end. ZTD now uses the idea of the consciousness traveling across time and space and RUNS with it. I also think that Delta has a cool design.

I’ll be nice again later, but now for the things I Did Not Like.

Emo Moody Junpei makes sense from a writing standpoint, but that doesn’t mean I have to like him. Maybe I just got spoiled since Evan Wilson did a spectacular job with his deliveries in 999 and in ZTD it seems like his soul got sucked out. Not the fault of the delivery as much as it is the writing. Eric is bad, and I feel like that statement isn’t controversial. I don’t think anyone likes Eric, and if you do, then sorry for shitting on him so much, but god I just don’t like him. And the abusive childhood thing doesn’t give me a drop of sympathy, but then again I’ve always hated the writing trick that “this person is shitty and pathetic but it’s because abuse!” (see also Mikan). Diane is boring (sorry).

But I fuuuuuckin HATE Mira. I hate Mira so much. Like, at first I thought she’d be alright, yeah she’s definitely The Boob Character™, but I liked Lotus well enough and Alice grew on me significantly, so I don’t see why Mira won’t. Then she’s like “surprise I’m a serial killer”. Now if they just made her a serial killer, it would be kinda boring so I’m glad they TRIED something new. I just think the result was bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad. Like....”hmm I never felt any emotions so when my mom told me they were kept in hearts I just ripped em out of people :)” is some garbage I’d write in middle school when I felt especially edgy. Also yeah seems p ableist. I won’t go too deeper into Mira, since she’s a sociopath and I don’t know enough about the actual disorder to put a candle to the real thing, but....bleh.

I won’t touch on THIS aspect for too long because I’m aware that it had barely any budget and it wouldn’t have happened without a kickstarter (don’t know the details), but the animation is just....so stiff. It really takes away from the dramatic impact some scenes are meant to have. But even IF the animation wasn’t stiff, I still am not a big fan of the darker and moodier direction it went. Although that’s moreso down to personal preference. Final note about the presentation (which is by far the game’s weakest aspect) is that I noticed multiple points in the sound mixing got to nearly Sonic Adventure 2 levels of being unable to understand what people were saying.

Alright. Now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Let’s talk about Delta. This is going to make up a MAJORITY of this post so strap in.

Delta is a meme. There’s no other way to say it briefly. He’s just such a huge fucking meme. Almost everything about him, from his plan to his “complex” motives to his backstory to his powers. I mentioned liking his design, but fuck it. That’s a meme now too. Delta is the stupidest part of the game, and as much as I kind of love it, I also need to complain about it.

First let’s talk about Delta’s plan (because it starts with the nicest part of this segment). His motives are “complex” which is actually greek for “he’s probably either a liar, an idiot, or both”. I said there was nice things, so I’ll start with those. The very ending’s “ah ah ah. I never killed any of you in this timeline. If you arrested someone for crimes of another history, there would be criminals everywhere” was something I actually legitimately enjoyed. Yeah, intent was still there and he’s still a bastard (plus there was kidnapping and non-consensual drugging involved so kind of a stupid take), but I still thought it was a fun attempt. And also the “I had to make sure I was born” thing is a mindfuck, and I love those. Basically the first retort is “well I’m alive, right? So I don’t need to make sure I was born with powers because I WAS born with powers, which means it happened in another universe. So I don’t have to.” Only to then realize that we’re just in the universe where he DID do that but then the only justification is “someone had to” right? Wrong. Let’s talk about the rest of his “complex” motives

So I give a pass to “I had to make sure I was born”, but now we see why he had to do this whole deal and what he declares at the end of the game. That there’s some religious fanatic who intends to blow up the world and completely end humanity. And he released Radical-6 in the VLR timeline hoping that it would kill the terroris only killing 4 billion people instead of 6 billion people. In the timeline at the end of ZTD, he says that they had used this experience to hone the skills of the Shifters that way they could use their newly honed take down the religious fanatic WITHOUT Radical-6 and save the world.

What?

Now......before I tear into this.....I have ONE nice thing to say. The “unleash radical 6 and kill 4 billion vs let a terrorist end humanity” gambit IS cleverly foreshadowed with the radical 6 decision game with Q Team. But also wouldn’t that have made, like 1800 times more narrative sense to give that decision game to team D who KNOWS the impact of radical 6, or team C who he explains this plan to later on? Damn, even my nice thing was backhanded. Alright let’s REALLY tear into it.

FIRST of all, this is the exact same plot of Virtue’s Last Reward. Only difference is that somehow Akane and Junpei are just as skilled at this technique as Sigma and Phi despite the latter going to do Moon Training (granted the moon training was also to give them enough of a jump to go back 45 years). Speaking of Virtue’s Last Reward, this game also reveals that Delta is Brother, the leader of Free the Soul. A group of religious fanatics. So I wouldn’t be especially shocked if the religious fanatic is working with Free the Soul. But for the sake of this argument, let’s just say they aren’t with FtS. How in the Flavor-Blasted FUCK does he know this? Did somebody Shift back from that timeline and then just get Mind hacked (and we’ll fUCKING talk about Mind Hacking dont you worry)? How would that be the only piece of information known about the end of the god damn world? And if there IS more, then why the fuck wouldn’t you tell them the information? How does he know that it’s inevitable when apparently a god damn snail can unleash Radical-6?

I call bullshit on the “religious fanatic” thing. Wanna know why? Because at this point, Delta had already founded Free The Soul. He started this shit in 1938. At this point in time, he and the rest of the Free the Soul had already kidnapped Alice’s dad to create clones of his dead brother. He was pushing for a new world order and then in the VLR timeline, tried to PREVENT this whole thing from happening by sending Dio to the Moon. So if he actually gave a shit about “honing their abilities” then why would he do everything in his power to stop it? There is ONE out that there can be, but it’s something not even HINTED at (and I’ll talk about this later), but I think that "religious fanatic” is a big ol’ lie that he made up to try and save face when he was faced with a consequence, but even that explanation makes no sense since he’s like “lol shoot me if u wanna I wont mind hack you”

And let’s talk about mind hacking. Let’s fucking talk about Mind Hacking. Adding Mind Hacking was stupid, completely pointless, out of left field, and actively makes Delta a worse character. For those that don’t know, Mind Hacking is an ability that only Delta has (and I guess the player character technically but that’s a whole meta thing from VLR that doesn’t get followed up on) where you can read people’s minds and also fuckin control them. Why? Why was this necessary, ZTD? You wanna know what I thought was really neat? When I saw that different timelines produced different X-Codes. I thought “oh shit, I know this is Game Stuff, but the sheer foresight of the villain to do that? That’s some Moriarty shit.” It would require some insane explanations, but we’ve had enough sci-fi that we could imagine with enough advanced tech, you could set up systems that could use conditionals to give certain responses based on certain outcomes. Like if someone dies after the decontamination room button is pressed, then the central computer outputs a different X-Code than if it’s after the initial vote. Just make up a new tech that accounts for Shifting (plus the QUANTUM COMPUTER you have RIGHT THERE) and you could make a villain with so much calculated foresight that he’s just a god damn genius. But no. Mind hacking. None of that interesting stuff, just “lol I read ur mind idiot”. No outwitting anyone, just “lol get mindhacked eric u scrub bang bang”.

Honest to god, honest to FUCKING god, do you want to know how cool the final cutscene would have made Delta look if he walked out and just KNEW what happened in another timeline because of his plans. Like everyone recognizes him as Delta and he just goes “ohoho I see you had a fun time in my other timeline” using that deduction alone. But nah, he’s just like “yo I just mindhacked y’all, nice experience y’all had” I hate mind hacking so much. There’s no part of his plan where he NEEDED to mind hack in order to succeed that could have been written without mind hacking.

Now there’s a bit of a missed opportunity here that could both make mind hacking relevant, made his motive not shit, and also maybe even developed him into a SUPER interesting character! I know this is a bit fanfic-y, but hear me out. Make Delta a VICTIM of the stable time loop/bootstrap paradox. For those who don’t know, the bootstrap paradox is when time travel makes certain events happen seemingly out of thin air since they are their own cause. Basically it’s this clip from Milo Murphy. This is something that seems like it’s KINDA there in the subtext, but if they actually dove into it, they could have a GOLD mine.

What if we keep the mindhacking, and before he even MAKES Free the Soul, he mindhacks someone who experienced the events of the “religious fanatic”. But not just anyone. An experienced SHIFTer who made it their goal to stop this religious fanatic. After hundreds of attempts, they still fail. Delta sees this and determines it to be inevitable. So he’s having fun, cursed by the knowledge of an inevitable apocalypse. Then he meets Akane, Phi, Sigma, or Junpei after they had undergone the events of VLR and ZTD. He learns that particular timeline. A bleak future, yes, but one single future where humanity is alive. He sees two futures, one in which all of humanity dies, and one where he is the leader of a religious cult that wipes out 4 Billion People with a deadly pandemic. And the idea of being that person disgusts him. He despises it. But he’s completely resigned to fate. He knows that things must go precisely as he’s seen at the price of humanity, too frightened by such a burden to even take a toe off of the predetermined pathway. His motive is that he’s so tightly bound to fate and so afraid to let it slip that he has no choice but to commit the atrocities, despising himself for it every step of the way, but considering it better than the inevitable alternative. It would give a purpose for the mindhacking powers, it would give him a solid motive, and it would make the ending SO much stronger, showing the contrast between a group of SHIFTers confident that they can change fate and the man who is completely resigned to his own. Fuck, I might steal this character concept because I REALLY think this idea would work to make an interesting villain!

Like I mentioned, this is KINDA there in subtext (with him quite frequently saying “life truly is unfair”) and this could be an interpretation of the character, but if ZTD had explored that theme, then holy hell what an interesting character Delta would be.

But even WITH this fix, holy hell, this plan is stupid. Because guess what, dingus. You just created like 30 new timelines that all end in annihilation.

He coulda said ONE line about “even if there is only one history that ends nicely, that is solace enough”, that might have been dark, but still powerful. You know, add some depth. But instead, he’s just like “hmm hmm shoot me”

And the Q Twist? I’m honestly not as mad at it as I should be. On one hand, it does that cute thing where there are little bits of foreshadowing so when you rewatch it, you notice little bits like shadows and stuff, but on the other hand, there are PLENTY of points where either the camera just straight up lies to you and doesn’t show him when he should be there or Delta’s just been fuckin SHMOOVIN on his wheelchair around the room constantly to stay out of the camera and everyone’s just been kinda chill with it. Maybe if they had been more careful with the camera it could have delivered a TOUCH better. Like, even if the shots are a bit off, that’s noticeable enough to be part of the hint, no? I don’t have as much to say about this, mostly because this post is getting long as fuck so I’m gonna wrap it up so I can move on with my life for a bit.

So even with ALL OF THAT, I still enjoyed playing the game. That’s right, compliment sandwich time. The three wards all being one ward was a really neat reveal. The fact that you can shoot Delta in one scene is creative with its replay value. I’m glad they touched on the philosophical idea of what happens to the people who made it out from the coin flip only to get SHIFTed into the exploding lab, and exploring that idea was fun. I absolutely lost my mind at the idea of the gun to sigmas head had a random chance of firing and then seeing it elaborated on in the dice scene directly after it. Gab is a good boy.

Cant wait to play AI