#and i have been meaning to write this particular thing for literal years

[faejilly]

regret

so. literally seven years ago, I started a 'series of firsts' style fluff-fic(let collection) for Malec/Shadowhunters... and I think part of why I got stuck on it in particular (even beyond the not writing much for the last couple years) is because it is in fact supposed to be in chronological order following the show and I had hit a point where I needed a... not!fluff chapter, and I kept trying to just... skip the sad and write more fluff for the fluff fic.

But I'm writing a vignette series for a melodrama. So. Melodrama has been written, of Alec Lightwood Overthinking Things but not being wrong, so how is he supposed to stop? (This takes place after s2e12, which is the disaster of a body swap episode, for anyone not so obsessed with the show as to know that off the top of their heads)

It is not the first time Alec has known that he’s not good enough for Magnus. He’s always known that, since the first time he laid eyes on him.

It is the first time that he thinks Magnus might agree with him.

Magnus said he wanted some space. Tonight (just tonight implied but not stated by the softness of his voice, the brush of his fingers against the seam of Alec’s sleeve) Magnus wanted some quiet.

So Alec left Magnus alone, and now he’s standing in his institute bathroom staring into the institute mirror gripping the white porcelain edges of an institute sink, trying to decide if that was right.

He doesn’t think it was, but he’s not sure if it’s the space that’s wrong, or the just for tonight.

He knows which he wants it to be, but that’s irrelevant.

Magnus likes to retreat when he’s hurt, but that doesn’t mean that’s good for him; Alec might not have known Magnus for long, but he recognizes a protective flinch when he sees it. And if that’s the case, then Alec should in fact head right back out and refuse to let Magnus hide and hold him tight until Magnus feels like he's himself again.

But Alec didn’t believe what Magnus said too many times already, he can’t…

He can’t go against Magnus’ request, not now that he finally made one. Always letting Alec set the pace, waiting for Alec to reach out, for Alec to act, to ask, and when he finally lets himself say what he wants?

It’s less of Alec, rather than more.

Smart of him, of course. Alec would never blame him for it, especially not after Azazel and Valentine and Alec failing him in every way it was possible to fail. There has always been a disparity between what Magnus deserves and what Alec is capable of offering; perhaps it is too large of one to ever be overcome.

Only he knows he wants to keep trying.

He also knows that staring at his mirror and overthinking things is his own protective flinch.

Magnus said he doesn’t know what he needs. Alec is mostly sure that’s true, that if Magnus knew that Alec caused more harm than could possibly be worth it he would say so — but only mostly. Magnus has been abandoned too many times to be the person leaving unless he’s sure.

Not even then, perhaps.

Alec has some idea of how many times Magnus forgave Camille, and she was cruel on purpose, unlike Alec who keeps twisting the knife entirely by accident.

If Magnus won’t do it, Alec will have to. He refuses to walk Magnus down a road to hell paved by his own so-called “good intentions”. He’ll stay away forever if that’s better for Magnus, regardless of how Alec feels about it, will feel about it, will always feel about Magnus. It’s only right, not letting Magnus suffer the consequences of trying to be involved with–

Alec stops himself there.

Anything he thinks to call himself, any self-assessment he can manage right now, will be more severe than anything Magnus would think, or say, or even accept if Alec tried to say it, so it won’t help him decide what to do.

He has to figure out how to help in a way that Magnus will accept, and if he leads with a list of all his failures, Magnus will be happy to try and make Alec feel better and aggressively avoid letting Alec try to help him.

Alec doesn’t need to feel better. Aldertree’s gone, Isabelle’s back, (Imogen’s difficult but familiar), and Jace is, while still fucked up, at least not trying to smother the parabatai bond so tightly that Alec feels like he’s being strangled in his sleep every night.

So.

Alec sighs, lets go of the sink, forces his shoulders to relax.

This is the first time that Magnus has said he needs space, but considering the politics of their lives, even now that Valentine’s in custody (especially now, considering everything Herondale did to Magnus in Valentine’s name), it probably won’t be the last.

Alec can’t override that, not just because he’s sad and guilty and young and stupid.

He just has to learn better.

He’s always had to be better than he is, he’s not sure why he thought things with Magnus might be different.

That’s not Magnus’ fault though, and he can’t let himself start to think about it in terms of hopes dashed or desires failed because then he will be upset at the only person who has never ever let him down, despite all Alec’s failures and stumbles.

He doesn’t deserve Magnus, of course he doesn’t, but that’s all right. It’s Magnus’ turn to make a choice, and he can have all the time and space he needs to do so.

Alec will wait.

He’ll wait forever, if he has to.

He’ll wait past forever, this life and the next; he’s already made his choice.

[catras-breakup-song]

it’s already annoying enough that they still, in 2025, 4.5 years after the fifth season ended, run blogs almost solely dedicated to hating on a cartoon since they can’t find a better hobby, but what really bothers me at this point is how they have to make their superiority complex everyone else’s problem and go out of their way to bully & harass stans over their posts under the guise of “debunking arguments” (which, even if that is true, debates aren’t always inherently invited and dragging someone into them by assuming “existence of post = open discussion” when they aren’t interested may violate a boundary), usually indirectly so that we don’t know and won’t respond to it.

glimmadora shippers (who are catradora antis, nothing wrong with just liking the ship itself!) are definitely the most frequently guilty, thinking of 1-2 blog usernames in particular here, and they largely overlap with the first group in your list — many of them tend to also be lumity fans (again, so am i, i have the owl house showrunner’s art of them as my main blog’s icon; that alone is not the issue) and compare it to catradora because if it’s not perfect fluff then it’s apparently not acceptable to portray in (animated) media. it’s rather ironic because they are so loud about being against toxic behavior + obsession with people minding their own business, but have no problem actively engaging with these things online in order to make sure others know they hold the wrong opinion over pixels + lines on a screen.

the ones that have really surprised me though, are hordak & shadow weaver stans. it’s a cheap excuse to accuse them of ableism* & misogyny & lesbophobia (and trust me, i also hate pointing fingers at baseless bigotry when it doesn’t apply tot the situation), yet abusive characters in this show are clearly fine to enjoy just as long as they’re not catra, which therefore implies… exactly those ideas. they hide behind a façade of caring about ableism via entrapta’s writing** and the end scene of 4x01 when catra holds hordak’s crystal over his head to bribe him, but either they’re very biased and cherrypick who deserves protection from discriminatory beliefs based on a subjective “perfect victim” status in the fandom, or they’re simply weaponizing those criticism arguments in order to silence opposing voices among the discourse regarding catra’s redemption arc getting more attention, since she’s a main character, than the cardboard cutout big-bad villain, who wasn’t supposed to have anywhere near as much development or sympathy given from the beginning. i roll my eyes when they complain about how season five catered to her so much, especially instead of hordak, because the show has literally always been primarily about catradora and the best friends squad by extension; hordak was nothing more than a tool for the narrative. that means you got what you came for, so you can either stay mad or leave ─ i highly suggest the latter for everyone else's sake.

i’ve been collecting receipts of the latter group that you can check through all the various reblogs (it’s not a neat consecutive thread unfortunately, sorry) in the notes here, just because it’s difficult for me to believe those takes are actually real if i can’t prove it to even just myself, lol lmao.

another thing i’d like to mention is that i’ve seen antis mention biphobia coming from she-ra stans a few times now, and as a bisexual activist who is unapologetic about calling that crap out without any respect for the perpetrator, the funny thing is… this is pretty much the only fandom where it hasn’t occurred that much in my experience, let alone to such an unbearable level — mind you, i’ve been here since june 2020 (not on this account, but wherever SPOP existed on the internet). it’s always been much more prevalent in arcane spaces, hell even the owl house with three prominent bisexual characters and only one canon lesbian is filled with far too much erasure & policing regarding our identity. also no one ever cares about bringing up bisexuals unless it’s to hate on us somehow, so i always find a sudden uptick in concern from monos that can be essentially read as a “gotcha” or otherwise supporting detail rather than its own thoughtful discussion to be deceitful and i tend to be quite wary of it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

*ableism in this case comes from catra’s heavy BPD-coding, which i can speak on as i also have it — or at least share most of its symptoms consistently, which has been overall agreed upon by my psychiatrist.

**that’s not to say how entrapta being autistic was handled, especially in 5x02, isn’t problematic, especially considering i’m autistic too and that has rightfully made our community uncomfortable, generally speaking. i just don’t trust authentic critique with genuine love for the character or even basic respect for this piece of media as a whole to come from that crowd specifically.

i'm losing my mind how are there STILL ACTIVE CATRA HATE BLOGS it's been FOUR YEARS how are you still this mad about a female abuse victim!!!!!! how do you STILL not get it!!!!!!!!!!

I have been in enough fandoms to understand that some of the people who stick around the longest are those who act the most scarred after watching the media. It's like stockholme syndrome. Or it's like hating the thing is what gives them drive in the world.

I have also been on the other side of this. I remained a Homestuck blog for a whole four years after the ending made me depressed about Terezi Pyrope, even lasting an additional year and a half after the dogshit epilogues released, through to the demise of Hiveswap and Homestuck^2, before I realised enough was enough and let Adventure Time give me sanctuary again.

But Homestuck had its Gamzee fans who hated the comic and fandom, Adventure Time had its Lemongrab fans who hated the show and fandom, and it seems She-ra has its fair share of antis.

The She-ra antis consist of the following groups, from my observation:

Former fans who got obsessed with some other show and have to bash She-ra because it ain't cool anymore. Usually Owl House fans but can be from anywhere. Their hate is universally connected to propping something else up, and is never done in isolation.

Hordak fans who hate Catra and maybe every other character and crew member and the show. There are a lot of the reverse, Catra fans who hate Hordak, which is part of why this group is so persistent, as a "counter" to this Hordak hate. However, the Catra fans who are Hordak antis MOSTLY do not hate the show (they are just... out of touch with it and generally have bad takes). I've seen one or two extreme cases of Catra apologists accusing Adora, Scorpia, and even Entrapta of abuse, but they were completely alone in their feelings. The Hordak fans who hate Catra tend to also hate Glimmer, Mermista, Adora, Bow, and say that the show is ableist or whatever, but they do not actually harbor much love for Entrapta. Her victimisation is an excuse for their behaviour and they have no understanding of her chaotic character. Do not interact.

Glimmadora fans (the ones who purely seem to exist to make 'Spop Is Abusive' posts). Why the fuck Glimmadora fans hate the show so much, I do not understand. But these are probably the most In-Your-Face of these three groups. While the Hordak fans mentioned above have a lot of similarity to Homestuck Gamzee fans or Adventure Time Lemongrab fans in the weird way they'll hate on the show for doing their blorbo wrong, Glimmadora fans don't have that evidence because they don't really care about Glimmer or Adora. They have absolutely nothing to say about the show, other than that it is Bad. My theory on these Glimmadora fans is that they really liked the Glimmer and Adora ship on a superficial level, and then the show decided to have its Deeper Themes and give Catra and Adora a messy, complicated relationship. There was a lot happening after season 3 where people went "CATRADORA IS REALLY ABUSIVE AND CATRA IS HORRIBLE AND YOU SHOULDNT SHIP HER WITH ANYONE". This period was SO fucking harmful to the fandom that it never recovered, so much work was lost and deleted from AO3. People would say "Glimmadora is a much better ship anyway". But then when season 4 rolled around and, uhh, Glimmer was acting like a little shit all season (for good reason but she really fucked things up with Adora), and Glimmadora crumbled into ash? Well the Glimmadora truthists felt like the show was working against them and that Season 5 was a grand conspiracy to make the Abusive ship Catradora canon!!! The funniest part of this is I sympathise a lot with these feelings. I used to be a Glimmadora truther myself when I watched the show in fall 2021. I was like, "wow, look how nice this ship is. And they go with catradora in the end?? Fucking HOW???". But then seasons 4 and 5 happened and.... yeah, I was disappointed with how Glimmer and Adora's friendship ended up, but I was ENAMORED by the messiness of Catra's character and how raw her and Adora felt about each other even in spite of all the bullshit. I never made excuses about the show being abuse apologising. I analysed it purely in how believable the relationships were and what the intentions of the characters are.

Of these groups, the ones responsible for the most actual SPOP Anti blogs are undoubtedly the Glimmadoras. The only time I've seen something similar, so many antis appearing, was because of Steven Universe ship wars. You have NO IDEA how petty people feel about Lapidot, Amedot, all the dots, all the amethysts. A crew member was chased off the internet over it, or left the internet over the show's own decisions, depending on whether you believe the """screenshots""" that were taken of Zuke's ""private blog""".

[professorsnape394]

Day 10: Dream Come True

Pairing: Severus Snape x ex-student

Rating: 🥵 ?

Prompt: Dream

Summary: Severus reunites with an old student of his and she is determined to live out her teenage dream.

A/N: Loved writing this one!! Hope ya'll have as much fun reading it as I had writing it.

Warnings: ex-student and teacher hooking up.

Word Count: 3170

Credits to Gif Creator

Severus had always loathed Lucius Malfoy’s elaborate parties. He threw them multiple times a year, celebrating every possible occasion, and Severus almost always declined the invitation. While he would know most people in attendance, Snape wasn’t one to socialise and a party was his idea of literal hell. However, given that Lucius was the closest thing Severus had to a friend, he made a point to show face at one event each year; often staying for no longer than an hour or so and spending most of the time hauled up in the kitchen alone. Which is where he happened to find himself tonight.

Having already circulated the crowds earlier in the evening, Severus was simply buying time before he made his goodbyes and returned home to the peace of Spinner’s end. The drinks and food were set out on a banquet table in the drawing room of the manor, meaning he often had the kitchen entirely to himself to drink bottle after bottle of FireWhiskey alone.

This evening seemed to be following the same suit as usual, until his tranquillity was disturbed by the entrance of a familiar young woman and her absolutely foul mouth.

“Fucking disgusting shit. Who the fuck does he think I am. And why the hell is it blue?” She muttered to herself, staring deeply at the electric looking cocktail in her hand. She made a direct bee line for the sink and dumped the entire contents of her glass down the drain.

Severus couldn’t help but let out a small scoff of approval at the girl’s words. He, of course, recognised her from her time as a student at Hogwarts. Not only had he been the Head of her House, and Potion’s Master, he often found himself telling her off for her bad language at the risk losing points from the other professors. Severus himself didn’t mind it so much, in fact he found it rather amusing, which must explain why he was no where near as irritated as he usually would be by the disturbance.

“Professor Snape?”

The girl stopped in her tracks, eyeing the Potion’s Master appreciatively. Her tone had dropped to an almost sultry timbre.

Severus remembered now why he always seemed to be giving the girl into trouble. This particular young woman had not been nearly as discreet with her girlhood crush as she may have expected. It had been obvious to him that she acted out in his classes simply to get a rise out of him, and best-case scenario she would earn a detention, prolonging their time together. The latter Severus did not indulge, the last thing he needed was a hormonal teenager making heart eyes at him from across the classroom.

From the way she looked at him now, the young witch had yet to grow out of her school-girl crush. Feeling the effects of the sheet amount of alcohol he had consumed; Severus couldn’t resist raking his eyes over the woman’s figure in return. She was after all, no longer his student.  

While her bad habits still remained, her appearance had changed a lot in a few short years. Her hair was longer now, darker too; she wore it down as she always had, allowing it to flow down her back like a waterfall of obsidian waves. Her previously baby face had been replaced by much sharper features; high cheek bones and a defined jaw line, lips that sat in a permanent perfect pout, painted a deep shade of red that only enticed him further. The dress she wore, tight and black, displayed her curves from ever possible angle, the lowcut neckline drawing his eyes to the exposed swell of her breasts.

“Miss Y/L/N.” He stated simply, not allowing his voice to betray his less than appropriate thoughts.

“I didn’t expect to see you here.” She sauntered toward him, swaying her hips with each step.

It wasn’t lost on her that her old professor had just been checking her out, in fact she welcomed it. Since her crush on him first developed in her fifth year, she had long since dreamed of running into him again after she graduated. It pleased her to know that now they were reunited, he seemed to appreciate her just as much as she did him.

“I could say the same for you.” He raised a single eyebrow at her, his eyes never leaving her body as she approached.

“Not sure why.” She shrugged, settling against the kitchen island opposite him. “I’ve been at every party this year. Draco keeps inviting me.”

“As his date?” The simple question drew a wide smile from Y/N.

Was Severus Snape jealous?

“I assume so. But if he keeps making me drinks that look like the result of a chemical reaction, he doesn’t stand a chance.”

Severus scoffed again, amused by her words.

Y/N watched as took a long sip of his whiskey, draining the remainder of his glass.

“What are you drinking?”

“FireWhiskey.” He said plainly.

“Mind if I join you?”

Severus glanced at the woman out the corner of his eye as she came to lean on the cabinet next time him.

“Be my guest. However, this is the last of this bottle.” He said, as he filled his glass. “I’m sure there’s more in the next room, if you feel like re-joining the party.”

“Not particularly.” She huffed, folding her arms over her chest only to further accentuate her breasts. “Draco’s been fallowing me around like a lost puppy all night, I could really use a break.”

“And if I asked you to leave?” He tested, pining her with a stern gaze.

“I’d say tough. You don’t own this space, I have just a much right to be here as you do.” She never had yielded to his dominance.

“Well then.” He outstretched his arm to her, offering up his renewed glass of whiskey. “You might as well enjoy yourself while you’re here.”

Y/N accepted with a smile and a wink. Severus remained stoic, attempting to seem unfazed by her gesture. Y/N always knew Severus would be a tough nut to crack if this day came. But after years of dealing with a pining Draco, she could use the challenge.

“Why are you hauled up in here anyway? Avoiding someone?”

“Everyone.”

Severus couldn’t peel his eyes away from her mouth as she drank form his glass, her crimson lips staining the rim of the crystal. He felt his pulse quicken when her tongue darted out to collect any remnants of the amber liquid from her lips.

“Everyone?” She looked at him inquisitively, returning the glass to him. “Then why come at all if all you’re going to do is hide away in here the whole night.”

“Lucius is a friend. The least I can do is show face, but beyond I have no interest in attending these infernal events. So, I simply wait it out in here until such time as it is appropriate to leave.”

“Does it never occur to you that had you to actually venture out into the crowds, you might meet someone to help pass the time. A woman perhaps?”

Severus laughed into his glass, being careful to avoid the spot her mouth had just been. He knew this was her way of testing him, unfortunately he couldn’t help but fall for her bait; hook, line and sinker.

“I have no interest in any of the woman beyond that door.” His eyes finally met hers, their intense gazes boring into one another. A challenge to make the first move.  

“What about those within this room, professor.” Y/N dared to venture.

That final word shook Severus back to reality; the sudden realisation that he was entering dangerous territory with a former student had him eager to make a swift exit.

“I think that may be my queue to go.” He set his now empty glass back on the counter.

“Wait. Stay for one more.” She pleaded, gripping his bicep in one last desperate attempt. It worked, Severus hesitated at her touch.

“It may have escaped your notice, Miss Y/L/N, but not only is the bottle finished, but so too is my glass. There is no ‘one more’.”

“I know where Lucius keeps his private stash. Draco and I would break into it all the time when we were younger.”

Despite his brain telling him it was time to go, Snape couldn’t resist the appeal of the young woman in front of him; her doe like eyes begging him to stay. It was obvious she was just as enticed by him as he was of her. And the fact remained; she was no longer his student. Still, it seemed wrong somehow.

“That would explain all those parties in the Slytherin common room I was forced to disband.” Severus raised a questioning brow.

“Guilty.” She smirked.

“You know those were the bane of my life. Dealing with drunk and hungover underage students wasn’t exactly how I planned to spend my weekends.”

“Just be grateful I was smart enough to avoid you, I can be quite the handful when I’m drunk.”

Severus didn’t know when she had gotten close to him again, but he wasn’t opposed to the way her hand rested on his chest as she fidgeted with the button of his robes.

“Show me.” He swallowed, nodding down to her.

Y/N led Severus through a door in the kitchen, to a wine cellar in the basement. In the corner of the room stood a solitary shelf of finely-aged whiskey, worth more than two teenagers could have even comprehended.

Snape watched on as the woman struggled to reach the top shelf where the best whiskey was kept. He made no attempt to look away when the hem of her dress began to slowly rise over the curve of her ass. He no longer felt so guilty checking her out down here in the dark.

“Clever girl.” Severus purred when Y/N handed him a dusty bottle for him to inspect. “These are what you stole?”

Y/N bit her lip and looked down guiltily.

“I don’t think we realised how expensive they were at the time. We just wanted to have a bit of fun.”

“Mmm. You always were trouble.” He eyed her once more.

“Still am.” She winked again.

Y/N led Severus back to the kitchen, leaving no trace of them behind besides the empty space on he shelf she had no intention of filling.

Despite the kitchen being full of glass and crystal ware, Severus opted to pour another singular glass for the two of them to share.

Y/N watched on fervently as Severus brought the glass to his lips, this time placing his mouth directly over where her lips had been. God, how she wished to know what his lips felt like on her, what he tasted like.

“Good?” She continued to look up at him, practically drooling now.

“Delicious.”

Y/N watched in awe as her ex-professor absent-mindedly run his tongue along a small part of the glass.

Without thought, Y/N brought a thumb to his mouth, brushing the pad gently across his bottom lip.

“Lipstick.” She explained. “Can’t have you leaving here looking like that, people will talk.”

“And what, exactly, will people say.” Severus closer to the young witch, his inhibitions slowly fading which each gulp of alcohol.

“They’d think you were with a woman.” She started, her voice now barely a whisper. “Of course, they wouldn’t know who at first. But seeing that colour on your lips, they’d begin to speculate. And when they saw me follow you out of here… We’ll they’d put two and two together, and jump to a whole lot of conclusions.”

“What sort of conclusions?” He passed the whiskey to her, allowing him to move closer still, their bodies close enough to touch.

“All kinds of things. The most obvious being that we kissed, but their minds wouldn’t stop there. Two people, alone in the kitchen at a party, we could have been up to anything in here.” With every word she spoke she drew Severus in closer, her lips calling to him like a siren to a sailor. “They’d assume we kissed. Maybe, we made out. But ultimately, they’re going to think we had sex. A teacher and his ex-student. How scandalous. There would be rumours about us; what we did in here. They’d say I seduced you with my body. They’d say you got me drunk. They’d say we fucked right here in the Malfoy’s kitchen, all while Draco searched the party for his supposed date.”

The mention of Draco began to boil Severus’ blood, he wasn’t oblivious to how close the pair were and he knew, if given the chance, Draco would have Y/N for his own. He wasn’t about to let that happen.

“Then let’s give them a reason to talk.” Severus stated firmly.

With his permission, Y/N threw herself at Severus. Her lips crashing to his hungrily. Like a starving hyena finally eating after being denied it’s prey for so long.

Practically throwing the whiskey glass aside, Y/N wrapped her arms around Severus’ neck, pulling her body closer to his. Severus felt his way around her; one hand coming to rest on the side of her face, the other gripping her rear possessively. The two became deaf to the world around them. Passion taking over as they devoured the other breathlessly.

Letting himself get carried away in the moment, it never occurred to Severus to move to a less public location. All sense of propriety gone with the taste of her lips.

Gripping her by her thighs, Severus lifted Y/N onto one of the kitchen cabinets, positioning himself between her open legs. Feeling the hardness of his cock at her core, Y/N let out a strangled moan.

Severus broke for breath, kissing his way down her exposed neck and chest, occasionally nipping at her pale white skin. Seconds before Snape was about to rip off the woman’s dress and fuck her in the middle of the kitchen island, footsteps and voices grew louder as they approached.

“Have you checked the kitchen, Draco? She can’t have gone far.”

“Not yet father, I’m just about to look.”

“Shit.”

“Fuck.” The pair swore in unison.

Y/N quickly jumped from her spot on the counter, making sure to right any clothing that may have gone awry. Severus let out a frustrated snarl at being torn away from Y/N.

“I’m going to kill that di-“

“Y/N?” Draco called out upon entering the room.

Neither Snape nor Y/N made an attempt to move away from the other.

“There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

“Sorry Draco.” Y/N replied through gritted teeth. “I ran into Professor Snape. We we’re just catching up.”

“I see.” The younger Malfoy eyed them suspiciously. “My father is about to make an announcement,  he wants everyone to gather in the drawing room.”

“Of course.” She smiled falsely, making to meet Draco by the door.

“Here.” Severus stopped her, clenching his jaw and handing over the almost full glass of whiskey. “You’ll need it.”

“Thank you.” She grinned, lingering when his hand brushed against hers.

The three of them exited the kitchen and made their way through the manor; Severus taking a different route from the others, letting himself get lost in the crowd.

As soon as he was out of her sight, Y/N started to panic that she had missed her shot at the one thing she had been dreaming about since she was 15 years old. Draco had interrupted what was easily the hottest make out session of her life and now there seemed to be no chance of her and Snape actually finishing what they had started.

“What were you and Snape doing in the kitchen for so long?” Draco finally broke the awkward silence that had developed.

“Hmm. Oh, we we’re just having a drink together and chatted about all those times you and I pissed him off with our parties in the common room.”

“What are you drinking? What happened to the one I gave you?” He didn’t even seem to be listening to a word she was saying.

“Erm… I finished it. Sev- Snape poured me a glass of his whiskey.”

“That’s unusually kind of him.” Draco’s intense stare burned a hole in the side of her face.

“I suppose.” She shrugged. “I guess he just likes me.”

Draco didn’t get the chance to object before his father’s voice echoed through the room.

Zoning out after Lucius thanked everyone for coming, Y/N immediately began scanning the crowd for her beloved professor.

Having no luck even after the party commenced, Y/N downed the remains of her drink and followed Draco as he led her into the hall for a more private conversation. Backing her against the wall, Y/N had no way to escape the agony she was about to endure, knowing exactly where this conversation was headed.

“Y/N.” He began with a deep breath. “As you know, we’ve been best friends since our first day at Hogwarts. Our families have been intwined since before either of us were even born. We’ve had our fair share of fun together; both as friends and otherwise.” He hinted towards the few drunken nights where they had casually hooked up. It had meant nothing to Y/N, clearly Draco did not feel the same way.

“This year I have felt our relationship has evolved past friendship, and I think it may be time we take the next step. I like you, Y/N. I want you to become my girlfriend, officially.”

“Draco…” She sighed. They had been over this before, she wasn’t interested in being anything other than friends, he just couldn’t take the hint.  

Before she had a chance to break the bad news to him a shadow fell over the pair; Severus Snape towered behind Draco, slapping a large hand on his suited shoulder.

“I’m afraid, Mr Malfoy, I do not believe Y/N is interested in pursuing a relationship with you.”

“Professor Snape.” Draco puffed his chest out, trying hard to hide the look of intimidation evident on his face. “With all due respect I don’t think this has anything to do with you.”

Severus moved the boy aside with ease, positioning himself between his two former students.

“I suggest you leave now, Malfoy, before your feelings get hurt.”

Severus did not warn him again. Instead, he took the opportunity to take Y/N in his arms and pick up exactly where they left off.

“Oh, thank god.” Y/N gasped, clutching at him desperately.

Just as passionately as before, Y/N captured Severus’ mouth with her own, pulling him in by his robes until their bodies were backed up against the wall.

“Want to get out of here?” Severus mumbled against her mouth.

“Fuck yes.”

Ignoring a dumbfounded Draco, the Potions Master and his former student made their way out of Malfoy Manor unable to keep their hands off one another.

Y/N’s dream was finally about to come true.

[meetmypointlessaddiction]

let me chase your demons away | l.howlett

First post of the New Year, hoping to write bigger and better things this year :)

Summary: Logan struggles to sleep... but not when you're around

Warnings: nightmares and panic attacks

Pairings: leaning more towards a fem!reader

Enjoy and please like and comment if you do. Something as simple as an emoji literally makes my day better so please don't hesitate to comment and obviously reblog to share my work.

Requests are also open if there is anything that people want me to write 💛

Logan had struggled with nightmares for as long as he could remember. Up until now, there had never been anything that could prevent the neverending terror loop his brain played on a night. Up until you.

You hadn’t been at the school long, Charles had invited you to come and teach English to some of the younger students, but Logan could tell there was something about you, something about your scent that made him relax. Your sleeping habits were just as messed up as his meaning that, whenever you both found yourself unable to sleep, you would both end up on the couch in the mansion’s living room, watching shitty movies to try and tempt you both to sleep. More often than not, it worked for Logan but little did you know that it wasn’t the mind numbing films or the peaceful silence, it was your company. 

For weeks, Logan would simply allow himself to fall asleep on the sofa beside you and it was the best night’s sleep he would have all week. He would ensure there was a good amount of distance between the two of you, not confident enough that he wouldn’t have a nightmare and go all Wolverine on you. You would wait until he fell asleep and then arrange his legs and neck comfortably on the couch, laying the thick blanket over him and then heading off to bed. 

When you were out on a mission or away from the mansion on a long period of time, Logan would have many nightmares. Nightmares meant a sleep deprived Logan and a sleep deprived Logan meant suffering for everyone else in the mansion. One night in particular, snow was falling heavily when Logan went to sleep and you were out of town, visiting some friends in a nearby village meaning a nightmare was 100% guaranteed. Snow was hard enough for Logan to manage, reminding him of Stryker and the physical and mental toll he went through. 

He woke with a start, his chest heaving and feeling tight, dripping sweat and struggling to concentrate on taking deep breaths. He didn’t know why it occurred to him but for some reason his first instinct was to call you so that’s what he did, not even considering the late hour, knowing that you were more than likely awake. 

In the next village over, your phone buzzing interrupted the conversation you and your friends were having over a bottle of wine. “Who’s calling you at this time?” Your friend, Georgia, asked with a smirk. 

“You got a secret boyfriend, you’re hiding from us?” Faith nudged you with a cheeky grin but you just gave them a half smile, standing and excusing yourself to take the call. 

“Logan? Has something happened?” You asked down the phone, alarmed by the heavy breathing and almost whimpers you could hear. 

“I-I think I’m havin’ a heart attack bub.” He said and you knew from then what was wrong. Since when does the Wolverine have heart attacks?

“Logan, you’re having a panic attack honey. You need to take deep breaths, sit yourself down and stop pacing, okay? Are you sat?” You asked and heard the creak of a bedframe as the man grumbled an affirmative. “Alright, in through your nose and out through your mouth. It’ll pass, Logan, I promise.” 

After a couple of minutes, his breathing began to even out the amount of noise he was making reduced. “I… sorry for interrupting your evenin’.” He ended the call quickly and you were left standing in the hall of your friends house, confused. Why did he call you out of everyone?

~~~~~~~~~~

A few days later, upon your return from your friend's house, Logan pulled you aside with a stern look on his face. “What happened the other night, didn't. Understand? Forget it.” 

You look at him, confused and slightly insulted. “What? You think I’m going to tell someone or something? You think I think of you any less because of it?” Your protest seemed to throw Logan off guard and he looked at you with wide eyes and his mouth slightly agape. “I don’t know who you think I am, Logan but that’s not the type of person I am.” 

~~~~~~~~~~

For the next few nights, Logan didn’t go downstairs to sit with you on the couch and watch shitty films, didn’t allow himself to bask in the comfort your company gave him. Instead, he suffered on minimal sleep and caffeine, causing headaches for everyone around him and snapping at every minor inconvenience in his life. 

Eventually, you grew tired of it and grabbed him by his forearm just as he was about to head to bed, dragging him towards the couch. “Everyone’s tired of your shit, Logan. Sit on the damn couch, watch a movie with me and sleep.” You demanded, pushing him to his side of the couch and putting the blanket over him before plopping yourself down at your side, closer than the pair of you would normally sit. Logan resisted for as long as he could but pure exhaustion gave him no other choice than to relax and sleep. His eyes fell shut and within minutes he was asleep, snoring and drool coming from his mouth. However, instead of going off to bed like you normally would, you rested your head against his shoulder and let yourself doze off. 

When the students and teachers of the school began waking up and racing downstairs to fight for the tv, they all fell silent at the sight of the notoriously grumpy Wolverine cuddled up with the cute English teacher, his face pressed into your hair as he spooned you, deep snores emanating for the man. Storm and Jean ushered the children out of the living room, telling them to leave the pair of you to rest for a little while longer while Scott immediately found a camera to take a photo to tease Logan with as soon as he woke up.

Dividers: @coolcatsgraphics

I'm also on A03 :)

[foreingersgod]

Can you write kate Martin x reader that she’s completely whipped by but they get into an argument and Kate says something she didn’t mean?

Wedding Planning . KM

pairing: kate martin x reader

synopsis: kate says something she doesn’t mean and it puts your relationship at risk.

A/N: guys i think this is my favorite kate fic so far

my masterlist

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

it had felt like you’ve known kate for a lifetime, having been together for 5 years. so naturally, when she proposed to you on your anniversary, you could hardly contain your excitement. there were tears, kissing and laughing (and the best engagement sex ever). it was the absolute best night of your life.

since you were a little girl you had dreamed of your wedding. you were obsessed with wedding dresses and falling in love, constantly imaging what your life was going to look like. when you’d play outside you’d make wedding bouquets out of wild flowers, or when you would draw portraits they’d always depict you walking down the isle. now that you were grown and engaged to the love of your life, you couldn’t wait to get started on planning the wedding.

kate, although she was equally ecstatic to get married, wasn’t as keen on wedding planning. she was more laid back with decisions and didn’t have any particular opinions on how she wanted it to look. ‘just as long as you’re happy, babe’ she would say. you didn’t mind all that much, in fact it made your life easier. you had full reign to make your wedding exactly how you had pictured it.

on the downside, it felt like you were doing this all alone when you really wished it was something you two could do together. you just wanted to sit down, after kate came home from practice and you from work, and look through different flowers and centerpieces. you wanted to do cake testings and pick out color schemes. but kate’s answer was always the same when you asked: ‘whatever you like, i like’.

you knew that possibly couldn’t be true. kate was an open book and you knew literally everything about her. there had to be at least one cake flavor she despised or one flower she didn’t like, there’s no way she was fine with anything. sometimes you felt irritated that there weren’t any disagreements about the wedding, she accepted any ideas you threw her way and it really bothered you. planning a wedding, throwing a party in honor of your love for one another, should be about what both of you want.

it had already been months since your engagement and the wedding was rolling around quicker than expected. within days, you became stressed and overwhelmed. there were still so many decisions to make, so many people to call, so many things that still needed to be made perfect. these past few weeks have been incredibly hectic, and to no surprise, you felt isolated and alone. perhaps it was just typical bridal anxiety, or maybe it was the fact that your fiancé wanted nothing to do with helping prepare for your big day.

one late night, around 12 am, you sat on the floor of your shared living room. you had came home late from a night shift at work, waiting up for kate to come home from a night out with the team. with the wedding being so close you decided to spend the extra time tying loose ends and checking things off your to do list. you always waited for kate when she was out late, it was near impossible to sleep without her, so you didn’t mind.

there were folders and binders spread on the coffee table in front of you. little scraps of color samples and inspiration pictures took up every square inch, various phone numbers and addresses also scattered every which way. to any outsider, it’d seem like chaos, but you enjoyed the sweet moments of wedding planning.

not long after you organized the floral section of your wedding binder, you heard the lock of the front door click open. it was followed by the creak of the hinges and heavy footsteps. you looked over from your spot on the ground, seeing kate drop her bag at the door and kick her shoes off. she was tired, you could tell, but still buzzing from hanging out with her teammates.

“hey, baby! you’re home!” you smiled as she approached you. she leant down to press a chaste kiss to your lips before setting down on the couch that you sat against.

“hey,” she was slightly out of breath. she was leaning over your shoulder now, eyeing the mess on the table “wedding stuff? this late?”

“yeah, i wanted to keep myself busy while i waited for you”

“gotcha” with a monotone response, she was already dismissing you and pulling out her phone. she didn’t ask about what you were arranging or what folder you were working on, but instead she was checking instagram?

it made your blood boil slightly, the way that she was completely clueless to anything wedding related.

“want to help me?” you asked, looking back at her “if you’re gonna be up for a little longer, i’d like the help”

“you know me, babe. i’m really not good with that, you’ve got the eye for all of it” she didn’t even bother to make eye contact with you.

“really?” you choked back a scoff, torn between wanting to be mad and confront her or letting the matter roll over.

“what do you mean ‘really’?” now she was paying attention, typical.

“don’t worry about it, let’s just go to to bed” you pushed yourself off the floor, putting on your slippers and heading for the stairs. before you could move, however, kate had grabbed your wrist gently to keep you in place.

“well i am worried,” her face contorted to any angry frown “why are you mad all of the sudden?”

“because kate, you’re pissing me off”

“what the hell did i do?”

you wanted to scream, the emotion starting to build up inside of you. for months you had been annoyed with how she left all the wedding stuff for you to do. how she didn’t even want to be involved in this made you feel like you weren’t doing this wedding to proclaim your love, that you were really just doing it for yourself.

it wasn’t your intention to pick this fight tonight, but oh god did you just want to get it all off your chest.

“i’m pissed because you don’t even want to help with this wedding, kate! you can’t even sit down with me for 5 minutes and help me organize a fucking folder”

“that’s not true i-”

“no it is!” you didn’t even want to hear the bullshit that was bout to spew from her mouth. she remained on the couch, jaw clenched in anger as you cut her off “every time i ask you to do something, you blow me off and leave me to do it by myself! you have no interest in doing any of it with me”

“babe, i’m just not good at that stuff. i thought you wanted to plan this?” she was chewing at the inside of her cheeks now, you could tell she was trying to avoid this conversation.

“with you! i want to plan this with you! but for some reason you want no part in it! i have asked time and time again for a little help in hopes that you’d become interested in it. because in all honesty, kate, i don’t even care about the wedding being perfect. i just want to do it with you! i want you to care and to go to run wedding errands with me, i want you to want to do it with me, but you don’t even give a shit!”

her face started to turn red with annoyance, eyes pressed shut. her large hands covered her face as the ran down her cheeks. she was practically huffing as she sat there listening to you completely hound her for her disinterest.

“you haven’t even asked me about what flowers i decided to go with or shown any fucking interest in my god damn dress. my dress, kate, the part that i’m most excited for. you don’t even care about that and it hurts. and you dont ev-”

“jesus, i don’t care about the fucking wedding, YN!”

she could have just punched you right in the face, it probably would have hurt less than hearing her say that. your heart dropped, noticing how she was seething in rage. jaw still clenched, hands tugging at the roots of her hair, trying to calm herself down.

your eyes welled with tears, body frozen as you tried to process what just happened. she she really not care at all? it didn’t take long for the tears to start spilling, running down your cheeks in heavy cascades. a sob struck your body, you tired to bite your lip to hold it back but it was no use.

“great,” you muttered. she finally looked up at, body softening when she realized what she said “glad i know how you feel”

“baby…” she stood up abruptly, trying to come over to you.

“save it, it’s clear that you don’t care about the wedding” more sobs took over you, it killed kate to see you like this. she was kicking herself internally for even thinking that. why did she say that?

“if it’s really that big of a deal” you stepped back when kate tried to reach for you hand to apologize “then let’s just call the whole thing off”

“YN, no” she begged, tears of her own building up “baby come on, i didn’t mean it, don’t say that”

“why not? i mean you don’t have any interest in it. like at all, not even enough to spend time with me to do it. so let’s just call it”

“i don’t want to call it off” her lips contorted to a frown “i wouldn’t have proposed if i didn’t want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you. honey please, i don’t want to call it off”

“you’re not acting like it” is all you could say, you were truly speechless at this point. “why scream at me that you ‘don’t care about the wedding’ when i’m trying to express my feelings to you if you don’t want to call it off”

“because i’m a fucking idiot” her voice wobbled as she began to cry. the pattern of her tears mimicking yours “i don’t know why i said that, it’s not true even in the slightest. i’ve just been so stressed with everything recently and stuff with the wedding has just been so overwhelming, but at the end of the day i just want to marry you, baby. that’s no excuse, i’ll admit that i haven’t been a very good fiancé”

“no you haven’t” you crossed your arms, wiping away some of your tears “i know things are stressful…and i get that, but you don’t even seem interested. like you don’t want to do this with me”

“i do,” another wave of sadness washes over her “i think i’m just scared. things are happening so quick and change makes me nervous…our life is so perfect and i’m worried that i’m gonna fuck it up somehow. whether it’s planning the wedding or being a shitty wife, i feel like im going to fail”

“kate…” you swallowed deeply. it sent another pang to your heart knowing that this is how she felt all along “is that really how you feel? like you’re going to fail?”

she nodded, sniffling as she looked down at her feet in embarrassment. you ran over to her in an instant to pull her into your arms. she collapsed into your body, arms wrapping around your waist, chin sitting atop your shoulder as she cried to you. your hands rubbed her back smoothly, letting her get all of it out.

“i’m sorry, i’m so sorry that i’ve been so shitty” you could feel your shirt dampen with teardrops “you don’t deserve any of this. i can’t believe i said i don’t care, i never meant it, i swear”

“hey hey hey,” your hand now finding the back of her head, running your fingers through her hair “it’s going to be ok, i get it, we can work past that. but the last thing i want is for you to feel like you’re going to be a shitty wife. baby, i don’t think you could be a bad wife even if you tried”

“you’re just saying that”

“i’m not! i mean it! you’re the love of my life and i think you’re perfect inside and out. i wouldn’t have said yes if i didn’t accept every part of you. we’ll have ups and downs like everyone does, but that doesn’t mean i don’t still love you and it certainly doesn’t make you a shitty wife”

she released you from the hug when you took ahold of her shoulders. you ran your palms up and down her biceps before moving to her face, fingers grazing her cheekbones.

“it’s going to be ok, alright?” you cracked a smile, pressing a kiss to her forehead as you got up on your tip toes.

“i’m sorry, i love you so much” she pulled you in for a real kiss, this time, lips coming into contact with yours.

“i love you too”

after that night, kate made it her mission to change. she started helping out more, like you had asked, but she was also doing things on her own. kate picked out her suit, called the wedding photographer, and a handful of other things on your list. it was clear to you now that she just needed reassurance. it was going to take sometime to recover from what she had said to you, but you knew none of it was true and it was something you could work past.

you just wanted to marry your girl.

and marry her, you did.

[spaghettixdemon]

J Stands for more words than one PT.1

“While introducing his new girlfriend to the team, JJ is automatically confronted with her feelings for Spencer when they begin to get in the way of things"

DISCLAIMER You are responsible for the content you consume. Make sure to read all necessary warnings. Minors do not interact. Please remember this is a work of fiction; if you don’t like it, don’t read it.

Warnings: Drinking/Drunkenness, P in V, getting freaky in a car, fighting, slight mentions of death, Jealousy??

Pairing: Spencer Reid x F! Reader

Word Count: 1.3k

This was originally in my Google Doc but I seem to have lost access to it :( SO I am re-writing it! (I will definitely add more chapters bc omg this is long)

—————————————————————————————————

"Alright anndd finally done!" Emily turned to JJ, clapping her hands together and beaming. Today was a paperwork day, and everyone had been working until the late hours. "These reports are killing me...I've been on the same one the majority of the day..." JJ spoke to Emily with a sigh and a slight smirk playing on her lips. Yes, JJ had been stuck on the same case most of the day, but it wasn't just the amount of work, no. That wasn't the only reason her day was moving so slowly.

Right across from her desk, in perfect view, was Spencer Reid- their little resident genius. His legs were crossed in his office chair, his curly hair fell in front of his eyes, and his long, slender fingers traced down the written report, scanning every word and spreading it within seconds effortlessly. JJ had always been close with Spencer- because of their tight-knit team, their ages, and of course, the butterflies she would get around him. They were the two closets in age at the BAU, so maybe that was part of the reasoning behind her crush, but honestly, she just thought he was very attractive.

So earlier today, when Spencer was talking on his phone nonstop, JJ was confused. Spencer was not a fan of technology, thinking back on how it took Spencer literal years to finally sign up for an email address. So, whatever was keeping Spencer on speed dial on the other line clearly didn't bother him too much. JJ would sneak glances towards her coworker hourly, taking in his body language and how he seemed to be head over heels. He would fidget and spin in his office chair as someone talked to him, he had a faint blush on his cheeks, and a smile plastered on his face. In all actuality, she'd never seen Spencer look so dopey- maybe he truly was just happy right now, but the emotions on his face surprised her.

"Hey lover-boy, what's going on over here?" JJ shot her head down, burying her face in her work. It was Derek who popped the question already on JJ's mind. Derek crossed his arms and leaned against Spencer's desk as Spencer looked up at Derek. Rolling his eyes and hanging up the phone, Spencer set the phone down on his desk. "Was that a girl on the other end of the line? I don't think I've ever seen you so happy to pick up a call at work." Both men laughed as Spencer grew a little quiet, sheepishly shrugging. "I mean- yeah, actually, you're right for once." Spencer laughed as an expression of excitement and shock plastered onto Derek's. "Wow really?" He laughed, a little in disbelief "Congrats man! That's awesome!"

JJ watched as the two guys hugged and discussed Spencer's new girlfriend. Weirdly, JJ felt a pang in her chest of embarrassment...or more like frustration. Why? She wasn't sure. JJ could read anyone within minutes, but she could never read her own emotions that well.

-----------------------------------------------------

Days had passed, and work was pretty much back to normal. Normal meaning JJ wasn't constantly hearing about Spencer's new girlfriend, who he adored so much. It was cute, yeah, and she did feel happy for the man and his newfound love, but it would get pretty repetitive after a while. Derek and Penelope, in particular, would not let up on the subject. It was cute when Penelope giggled and twirled her hair when asking about this girl, but the way Spencer would drop information on her so easily was frustrating.

Penelope beamed, ecstatic over all this new news. Then, looking at Derek, she gasped and clapped her hands together. "You should bring her here! We could all meet her it would be so nice..!" Spencer looked a little uneasy. The few times his relationship did start getting this serious, work would interfere and often kill the relationship. Though, Derek backed up Penelope and agreed it would be fun.

"I don't know guys...That might be a little intense..." JJ heard this and thought over the idea in her head. Meeting the girl Spencer was so enamored by might be interesting...to say the least. She looked up and smiled at the three talking. "No Spence you should totally bring her in! I want to meet this girl!" Spencer gave JJ a hesitant look, visibly thinking over the interaction in his head. He slowly smiled and rolled his eyes, looking at the three before him. "Ok Ok..I'll bring up the idea and if she's cool with it, I'll bring her here next Friday"

Penelope and Derek cheered while JJ sat there, smiling quietly. She clapped her hands together and sighed "Amazing! I can't wait".

-----------------------------------------------------

The week that followed that conversation wasn't a pleasant one. The team had traveled out of state to work on a pretty gruesome case- Spencer, in particular, had a rough time during the case. He should be used to the horrible feelings that came with the job, but it was never really easy dealing with death so often.

The team had thankfully made it back to base Friday, and everyone was exhausted. They spent the day quietly filling out paperwork and trying to unwind as they worked into the early hours of the night. Around 7pm, Spencer got a call. JJ noticed this in particular because of how eager he was to answer the phone. A small smile appeared on his face, and the faint blush was back. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, hanging up the call with a simple goodbye.

Spencer looked around at his friends as the smile on his face grew. "My Girlfriend is apparently downstairs in the lobby! ...I was thinking of bringing her up is everyone ok with that?" The office was suddenly filled with energy again, and everyone seemed to wake up. JJ in particular, shot her head up and looked at Spencer, a little shocked. She had completely forgotten this would be happening...She made eye contact with Spencer and looked a little hesitant as she spoke up. "um...yeah that would be great..!"

"Yes, PLEASE bring her up! I need some fun to distract me from all this work." Penelope popped her head out of her office as she spoke to Spencer. Spencer looked a little confused by what JJ had said but smiled and nodded anyway. He slowly made his way towards the elevator, a bit of pep in his step.

-----------------------------------------------------

Everyone in the office had quickly wrapped up what they had been working on and made their way to the office cubicles to meet this girl Spencer was so into. Penelope pulled up a chair next to JJ and beamed. "Are you excited to meet her?" JJ...still felt very conflicted. Just earlier that week, when they had been solving the case, She was staying in the hotel room next to Spencer's. She thought about how she ran into him shirtless and wearing sweatpants. He apologized and made his way inside his room, but she felt so conflicted.

She wasn't upset that he was shirtless...definitely not...but something about getting caught off guard like that made her blush. She remembered the feeble nerd she used to work with. He was in his mid-twenties and looked so new to the BAU world. Now, the man she saw earlier that week and today was a bit different. He had toughened up more and was a bit more muscular- not to a Derek level, but he definitely wasn't feeble anymore.

"Something like that" JJ mumbled to Penelope, a faint blush on her face. Penelope was about to question JJ, just as an elevator 'dinging' noise saved her. Everyone's attention was on the elevator and who was inside.

-----------------------------------------------------

[konpeitonom]

Hi I’m the OP who requested the recovered Curly hcs and I LOVE THEM SM!!! It’s so cute how clingy he became and how he tried to make amends for his inaction he absolutely would!!! There needs to be more love for disabled characters ✨✨✨✨

I’m going to take you up on your offer for a first time meeting after his recovery if you don’t mind your writing is so lovely!!! Maybe something about them meeting and their first date

Also age gap…40s/middle aged curly and late 20s reader… middle aged men save me ough

first meeting/dating recovered grant curly.

sfw— lowercase intended ^_^

fem reader —

requests are open and heavily encouraged, i write for every mw character ^.^

notes; hi anon! this has been sitting at the bottom of my inbox. just decided to work my way up. sorry this is late haha i hope you enjoy nonetheless. writing for recovered curly is very, very fun. i’ll admit that.

— i think id take him a couple years, closer to a decade, to start dating again! he doesn’t wanna burden anyone with his emotional state, so he’d wanna make sure he’s okay and happy before doing so.

— i like to think you guys met naturally. no dating apps, he’s too old for that. perhaps you guys frequent the same hospital, like you have an older relative there you see from time to time. whatever it is, he managed to land a date!

— he’d be so nervous! not in an insecure way, but in a, “it’s been a long time since i’ve done something like this.. i can’t mess it up.”

— he’d want to talk to you, get to know you just a little more than average before asking you out. yes, he’d ask you out. he wouldn’t be offended if you asked him out (and he’d actually appreciate it a ton) but he’s the guy! he’s supposed to be courting you.

— he’s traditional, so maybe a coffee shop- or lunch out. or in people-pleasing curlys case; whatever you wanted to do! even a walk in the park would suffice. and of course he’d always grab the check.

— he’s the type to ask very important questions on a first date. he never wants to waste anyone’s time, or waste his as well. like, what’s it you’re looking for? what do you value? just stuff like that. but only if the mood calls for if, if the date is very, very casual- then he’d bring it up later.

— he’d also ask you if you’re okay with how he looks. again, he isn’t insecure, but he understands the culture we live in.. but he’s certain you don’t mind, since you’re literally on a date together..

— would insist on taking you home, to make sure you get home safe. that’s a man’s job after all. he’d wait for you to walk in, and even then just wait a tinsy bit longer to make sure you’re 100% okay.

— he’d text you the morning after to make sure you slept well, ask you how you felt about the date and such. he’d ask for a second if you give a good response. this time something less formal, like maybe at a garden nearby- or at a bookstore.

— i think he’s really, really into books. he’d be so happy if you read anything he recommended. he’s a considerate man, so all your preferences would be taken into account.

— kisses on the cheek, or on the hands.. he’s a very sweet guy. won’t be so touchy if you resist in any way, but if you allow him, he’ll be all over you.. loves holding your hand! wouldn’t be afraid to initiate it first.

— he would send roses/your favorite flowers to your workplace! maybe a bit early on, when you start dating. he’s a very romantic man, and he isn’t afraid to show you that.

— he’s very particular about sending flowers. would understand flower meanings and everything! classic roses is always a good pick, but further on he’d move onto other things. like red carnations for when you’re on a business trip of some sorts.

— first kiss on the lips would be, a bit emotional for him, maybe? it’s been a long while since he’s done any of that, really, so the fact he can experience what love feels like again at such an older age? he feels lucky, very lucky.

— of course a fancy dinner date would come much sooner rather than later. would do many things to see you in a fancy dress, eating nice food. he’d feel so proud to be seen with you, how pretty you are.. and he can’t wait to spoil you for the rest of his days.

[aimedis]

david & angel headcanons 🐺👼

"oh angel.. my angel..."

david and angel are always touching each other's hands. especially angel who uses them to fidget when they're struggling to focus

angel doesn't usually call david "david" unless they're angry

david doesn't call angel by their name either

angel loves playing with david's hair

their song is perfect by ed sheeran (duhh)

angel likes to straddle david, like sitting on his hips with their hands on his chest and david likes it too

angel stands on their tippie toes to kiss david on the forehead and david thinks it’s endearing as shit

david loves resting his head on angel's chest almost as much as he loves their head on his

angel is the second oldest of five siblings and they all love david

angel's parents love david even more. they gave him the paternal relationship that he's been missing since his dad died even though he can't really tell them everything about him

angel used to have an eat1ng dis0rder. they are recovered but they sometimes still struggle with eating. david is always there to help him (rubbing their back, feeding them, encouraging them, distracting them etc.)

angel paints their nails often and david always picks the colour. he's very particular about it as well, making sure they don't use the same colour as last time and that the colour compliments their skin tone

they cut each other's hair at home

angel gets the biggest smile on their face whenever david introduces them as his mate

they are both ticklish so they chase each other around the house tickling each other (david uses it to get angel out of bed, angel uses it because they think they're hilarious)

angel is hands down the funniest person david knows

david never sleeps well if angel is away from home. if they haven't called him before bed, he doesn't sleep at all

angel is highkey obsessed with david. they always look for him in a crowd, they're always texting him, always talking or thinking about him

angel sing-songs "daveyyyy" whenever he's working or cooking and they're coming to bother him

david is lowkey obsessed with angel. he's also always talking to or about them, thinking about them, and spinning his wedding band around his finger when he misses them

whenever angel needs reassurance, david would always give it to them with the softest voice ever heard from him

david's love language is gift giving (and physical touch) and angel expects a new trinket or something from him at least three times a month

angel's love language is physical touch (and words of affirmation) and they just always know when he needs a pick-me-up cuddle or pep talk

angel writes david mini-love letters every few days and slip them in his jacket pocket

david introduced angel to his dad's grave after their one year anniversary. they both cried a lot

angel is such a crybaby when it comes to david being nice to them

when they argue, it's used to always be about david being unnecessarily rude and angel being invasive

now, they can argue about literally anything if they're heated enough

angel starts acting like david when they're fighting or just angry in general and two davids having an argument doesn't usually end well

their arguments end up as screaming matches more often than not but they don't really say things they don't mean anymore

they make up as soon as there's the slightest silence

"what are we arguing about again?" "i don't remember. want ice cream?"

the serious arguments aren't usually screaming battles, they do generally speak to each other calmly and respectfully when they're genuinely concerned about an issue

they have never slept separately (one in the bed, one on the couch) even when they're angry at each other

they don't go to sleep angry (at each other or otherwise)

angel got david flowers first in the relationship (they get each other flowers but david does it more)

angel has every single flower david has gotten them dried in a several scrapbooks

angel used to be simultaneously worried about being too much to handle and not enough for anyone in their life. the feeling eventually faded because they see the way david looked and continues to look at them

david thrives off of knowing how flustered he makes angel with no effort (he looks into their eyes for a second too long and their face flushes/they smile nervously and turn away)

angel does like working out with david a lot of the time though they have a lower endurance than david does so he helps them through their sets (david is their number one supporter)

david can tell when angel is in a bad mood within seconds, he can just feel it

during the solstice is one of the rare moments where angel will cook for david (they just spend the whole day taking care of him and cuddling him)

david covers angel’s face for them when they yawn in public. he also does it when they make questionable faces or if they start crying around other people, he’ll cover their face for them. (he does it so often that angel doesn’t think to do those things on their own anymore when david’s not around)

david never hesitates to pull angel closer whenever they flinch even a little

david always needing to slap angel’s ass before either of them leave to go anywhere (he slaps it hella hard if they’re caught off guard and taps it if they’re just moving to another room)

angel acts overly sweet and cringy to david on purpose in public to embarrass/annoy him (david does it to them in private so they feel how embarrassing it is) 

-angel holds and tugs onto david’s sleeves absentmindedly a lot (not for his attention most of the time just because they’re comfortable) 

whenever david says something “girly” or “online terminology”, angel always says “someone cooked here 🤨”. (it was them, they cooked here)

angel shaves david's face for him when they have a little extra time in the morning

david shaves whatever part of angel's body they usually shave as well

they love waking up at the same time in the morning because getting ready together is the best part of their day

they love showering together, not even sexually they just like being close to each other at all times

david often says "love you too" without the "i" just to piss angel off

david squeezes angel's cheeks all the time

angel thinks a jealous david is the funniest thing in the world because he's literally just sulking in a corner

david thinks a jealous angel is sexy because he thinks they're hot when they're mad

angel gets more jealous than david but only slightly. they know their man is hot and they see the looks his gets

they have resorted to straight up making out with him in public just to stake their claim. david is a freak and enjoys it

david sees angel talking to someone that's not him and he starts pouting (glaring). angel teases him about it all the time and he just grumbles into their neck

angel used to be a (contemporary) dancer and they do dramatically exaggerative revamps of their old routines in front of david to be funny (he laughs every time)

angel flexes being a shaw all the time, david flexes just being married

whenever angel is unable to play their favourite games for whatever reason, david will play it for them

they both spend an egregious amount of money on each other (especially with their wedding gifts to each other)

david never lets angel pay for anything if it's not a gift for him (angel hasn't touched a bill in five years)

angel gives their little siblings a lot of money all the time and when asked why, they say "i have a husband, i don't need it"

[gigglesandfreckles-hp]

okay so full transparency: i've never really read much fic. i don't have a ton of free time set aside for creative/recreational purposes and the time i do have, i use to write because that just fills me up a lot more. however, i made a commitment to consume more fan-created work in 2024 and i succeeded in that!!! there were still periods where i wasn't able to read much, which has lead to an ever-growing tbr, but i wanted to take a moment at the beginning of this new year to share a hodge-podge of some (completed) fics that wow'ed me this year. a great deal of these are several years old and likely 'old news,' but i got to experience their magic for the first time in 2024 and want to spend some time showing them some love!!! in no particular order:

in losing grip by @keep--driving - 2024 was the year of me learning to love a good second chances au. this fic has all the trope-y goodness you could ever want, along with toe-curling kiss scenes, the perfect kind of humour that makes you squeal into your pillow or porridge or wherever you find yourself, and characters that you just love and root for so easily. i especially loved her take on james and lily's mums and the ways they navigate the world with and beside their children. i read a large chunk of this fic on my kindle as i pushed a stroller this autumn and i will forever associate it with peace and calmness. i'll be re-reading it soon!!!

i love you (ain't that the worst thing you ever heard) by lizardcookie - enter: the other trope i fell in love with in 2024—failed friends with benefits. the way this fic deals with grief in such a poignant, devastating, incredible way had my jaw on the floor. yes there is sexy jily, but there is also giggly jily and insecure jily and scared jily and earnest jily and oh mannnn this is the good ish. the small detail of lily coming around to sirius and james both through her help with the flying motorbike. i love the minute breakdown of lily's thick walls until they come tumbling down and james is right there, waiting, as he always is, patient and Good.

i would drink a case of you, darling by treacherous_talks - one of the tags on this fic is "a good old fashioned 'lily and james get together fic' because there aren't enough of them" so obviously i was in from the jump. this magical fic does such an excellent job at highlighting exactly what it means to be a teenager with a crush on another teenager who you think has a crush on you but you're not completely sure and so you can't ruin it because what if you're wrong. that is such a jily sweet spot i don't often see done as well as it is in this fic!!!

poison of trust by soopsiedaisies - not a jily fic! gasp! in fact, it's remus and sirius (not wolfstar) who are actually not usually as compelling a relationship as some of the other marauder era possibilities. but this fic made me eat my words because it is delicious. the part that i literally included in my ao3 bookmark and that i think about all the time is when remus tries to accuse sirius of equating harry and james and sirius says, oooooh i have chills thinking about it, "i dare you to finish that sentence." YES guarddog sirius black! his position as sole protector of the potter family will never not be important to me and this fic highlights that in such a unique and compelling way.

bad day wall by @apalapucian - there's nothing i could say about this incredible fic that hasn't been said, and recently, but truly—jayne is such a phenomenal wordsmith. this has a dash of 'texting fic,' but make it canon compliant and so beautiful it makes you wanna diiiiiie. the blackevans is unmatched, of course. but james's head-over-heels-ness for lily also has to be mentioned. i love every single one of his batty contributions to the bad day wall as he mopes and wades through all the chaos of trying (and failing) to get over lily evans.

The Guide to Becoming a Better Man for Lily Evans by bronzeagepizzeria - the shirtless james potter agenda is quite special to me, which needs to be stated right out the gate, really. the shirtless james potter who is shirtless on purpose just to get under his dream girl's skin agenda is an ascension i have yet to come back down from.

Of Chrysalism by @maraudersftw - i shall give you this, line, dangling on a stick as a perfectly buttered and garlic'ed (??) carrot, enticing you to cast your cares aside and come read this fic: "He’s spoilt, and persistent, and endearing, and she’s hopeless." like??????? yeah. okay. sure. i'll pretend that i'm capable of returning from that in this lifetime. but actually: james "my feelings matter, too" potter is so important and i love the agency this fic gives him!!!

Scenes from a Hogsmeade Pub by @bcdaily - i think i read this years ago. perhaps. idk i was basically a baby when it was published in 2012. but i recently stumbled upon it (again? maybe?) and just absolutely devoured it. this is quintessential jily to me, in each iteration, as they grow and learn each other and finally, finally, finally choose each other. each of these scenes is so carefully crafted to showcase really important moments in their relationship, but does it using really unimportant moments, which is genius. it's the grand fromage of showing, not telling, and this would absolutely be the first week assigned reading on my syllabus if i got to live out my dream as a professor on jily.

say goodbye to my heart tonight by spinawren - my bookmark for this was literally just "SQUEEEEEEE" and i don't exactly know what i meant by that, but i think it's more eloquent than anything i could come up with here. the premise of this fic is genius: james and lily repeatedly having 'one-night stands' with each other until they realise they've accidentally started dating. but james potter's devotion to being in lily evans' presence is what makes this fic belong on the top shelf!

Bluebird by ocean_away - whewwww, this fic knocked me back in a way i didn't expect. it's a second chances fic of a different calibre all around, but what stands out to me the most in this particular fic is the way james and lily are both shown to so seamlessly grow. they begin as two broken, purposefully hurtful individuals (read: teenagers) and become young adults who choose goodness and each other over and over, even though it's not easy. i feel proud of them, when i read this fic. what a labour of love for our favourite couple.

The Way the Light Looks by @stonecoldhedwig - i have nothing more to say about this fic than this: BEST KISS SCENE I HAVE EVER AND WILL EVER READ!!!!!!!!!!!

Whispers in the Dark by @yallthemwitches - okayyyy so it's difficult to choose just one of tay's fics, but this is such a stand-out to me. friends to lovers!!!! james "but i've never lied to you" potter, i want to kiss you on the MOUTH! he's so earnest, so pure, so "no actually i just wanted to see you" when he has no business being such a sweetheart. honourable mention: the beyond-precious proposal scene at the end.

Love is Complicated by @theesteemedladydebourgh - this fic feels like sitting in the most beautiful library in the world watching rain trail down the ornate, darkened windows—and then the hottest professor on earth walks up to you and snogs you without preamble. except it's made better by the fact that he is somehow both james potter and an indiana jones variant? listen. just read it. then squeal and kick your feet with me, okay?

Sunshine in my Eyes by monroeslittle - another fic i devoured on my kindle this year (but definitely not during standardised testing at school when i was supposed to be actively monitoring teenagers for academic integrity and technically signed an oath that i locked all my electronics in the closet). ahem. this is some of the most rewarding angst i have ever read, which is genuinely some of the highest praise i could ever bestow on someone. lily going to james for lessons on how to kiss and the entire scene that follows will follow me forever. they're so endearing and sweet and did not deserve all they went through. but. angst with a happy ending xx

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

We Are and the evolution of Thai BL tropes

The QL discord started a rewatch of My Engineer a few weeks ago, and damn, has it been an interesting experience. At the time I originally watched My Engineer, there was little that stuck out to me, because so much of what happened felt so incredibly common in a lot of the (admittedly rather limited) number of BLs being produced. It felt like pretty standard fare.

But going back and watching it in juxtaposition with We Are airing has been so fascinating. This genre has been evolving, y'all.

As much as we all joke about always getting more university BLs, there is something to be said for a format that can be used as something of a metric for the genre. And though there's only four years between My Engineer and We Are, seeing them both at once gives me such an incredible appreciation for the direction the genre is going in, the impact of having more queer voices involved in the creation of QLs, and how there's a lot of good we can find in seemingly simple spaces.

Obligatory disclaimer: This is just my perspective and subjective interpretation of what I have seen as a BL viewer of some time; also I don't have time to go in and do a university deep dive, so this isn't a real analysis, but more of a brief writeup of observations.

Trends are not black and white, of course, there is a spectrum. I'm sure we'll suffer through more Dinosaur Loves. At the same time, having such predominant production companies as GMMTV putting effort into hiring queer creatives and subverting old cliche tropes is an encouraging thing. (Especially as they were the creators of the original university trendsetting BL with Sotus).

Note: For newer QL viewers, I highly recommend @absolutebl for brushing up on trope history. For university BLs in particular, this post and this post are great starting primers.

Let's talk tropes!

Ok, one more note - some tropes are being what I would consider subverted, some more adapted to a newer framework, and some just played with - I'm going to talk about how they appear to me, but I'm not going to be super pedantic over it, because this is just for fun.

Trope: Bullying/hazing behavior

This did not age well in My Engineer, and I would guess hasn't aged well in a number of BLs (and other media, because the whole "he's mean to you because he likes you" bullshit has been around forever). Not just because the behavior was shitty, but because it was played off in the script as cute, and implied that it was completely justified for the seme to do whatever he wanted in his pursuit of his uke.

(There was also quite a strong tone of internalized homophobia, with the lead feeling more comfortable in expressing his interest through harassment than honest emotion, but the show never actually engaged with that in any meaningful way.)

We Are sets up a very traditional enemies to lovers/bullying start to the story, with Phum taking advantage of Peem's economic situation to make him his "slave".

And yet... there's some important elements here that make this more than the standard use of the trope.

Phum keeps it pretty light in his bullying behavior, and clearly is using it more to keep Peem around as company, versus the kind of bullying in My Engineer, where Duen is literally hit by a car, and yet still expected to keep jumping to Bohn's whims.

As soon as Phum realizes he really upset Peem by leaving him waiting at the mall, he genuinely feels awful about it. It's clear that his intent is not to cause harm, and that he has a conscience. He wrestles with his feelings on it quite a bit, and it ends up being the thing that gets Phum to finally express an honest emotion with Peem.

And most importantly, the script does not let him off the hook. His behavior is bad, and is identified as such by the writing. Peem pushes back and is shown to be right to do so, Beer openly says he disapproves.

So instead of a cliche story beat that's used just to start the action, or a seme who's allowed to do whatever he wants because "passion" (blech), we're seeing it used for characterization, giving us important beats about who both Phum and Peem are in how they engage with each other through the use of the trope.

Trope: Obsessive/jealous behavior

Oh, this one was painful in My Engineer. Duen couldn't even talk to another human being without Bohn getting jealous and angry and dragging him away.

Phum gets jealous, particularly around Kluen, but what makes it feel so subversive here are two key things.

Phum's jealousy has a purpose here, it's not just for drama's sake. It's not the cliche seme doing whatever he wants and being treated as justified. It's deliberately being used to explore his insecurities, and give him a challenge to overcome. Phum doesn't stomp over and drag Peem away, he retreats, he hides. When his jealousy causes him to lash out at Peem, he is immediately aware he fucked up.

And again, the script is making it clear that this behavior is not ok. Peem chides Phum when he acts unkind to Kluen, and Beer makes it clear that the solution is not petty behavior, but actually figuring out a way to communicate his feelings with Peem before he misses his chance. This is portrayed as a barrier for Phum to overcome in order to be with Peem, not an expected part of a romantic relationship.

Trope: Friendship group

There are not enough words to express how much I love the friendship group in We Are. To be fair, this is one of the better historical tropes. We've gotten a lot of amazing friend groups, even in mediocre BLs.

But it's still different in We Are, for one simple reason. In most university BLs, the friend group is a supporting structure. But here?

The story lines may be about the romance, but the point of We Are is the friendship.

I will die on this hill, y'all.

I don't have enough time to go into it fully here, but this show is a love letter to friends. It's a tribute to finding the people who see the real you and have your back unconditionally. Who cheer your successes and commiserate over your defeats, who pick you up when the world knocks you down, who call you out when you make mistakes, and push you to be better.

And romance is lovely, but all of these budding relationships are about being friends first, and then lovers, because that friendship is just as important as everything else, if not more.

Trope: Pink milk

Lol, ok, kinda kidding, kinda not. I know we all got mad over the drink wastage, but also check out these visuals - it's about diversity baby!!

TanFang speed round

My two little trope-busting bebes. These two are already so beautifully non-traditional in their composition, but I love how frequently they are used to make fun of and play with tropes just on their own.

Introduced as pining crush/friend's older brother pair, but actually secret enemies to lovers.

Grumpy/sunshine pairing, where the sunshine used to be a fighter, and grumpy smiles when he thinks no one is watching.

Wound-tending where they keep poking each other instead of acting soft.

Openly mocking the jealous boyfriend trope.

Setting up the possessive trope when Tan doesn't pick up Fang's calls, only to immediately have Fang question if he's being unreasonable.

Setting up their own cute eating scene for kicks.

"First time" sex scene making it clear this is anything but their first time.

Tan holding Fang down in the cliche possessive pose, only for Fang to take the agency of kissing Tan. (And overall saying eff off at the cliche top/bottom roles old BLs were such a fan of).

In Summary

I'm sure there are more tropes that will come to me, and we do still have 5 episodes left of We Are, so there are some potential trope uses that I am keeping an eye on. This is by no means an all-inclusive list.

But I wanted to write this, because I was genuinely shocked to realize how different my My Engineer watching experience was this time compared to my first time. How over the last few years I'd come to expect more thoughtfulness in my QL media, even in the ones that seem shallow on the surface.

Considering how fast and furious the QLs are coming these days, it's easy to forget how recent it was that we were much more starved of content. And I think sometimes we forget to take in the big picture, of how far we've come in just a few years.

Critique is always going to be important, of course, it's part of what helps us make progress. At the same time, it doesn't hurt to take a moment to look around and see some good in where we are.

@sailorbryant thanks for the push to get this written! Feel free to add thoughts!

[g1rld1ary]

overheard that she was nineteen - james potter x reader

wc: 1058

cw: nothing, one swear, reader is sad on their birthday, implied fem!reader but i don't think any pronouns

chat how many aura points do i lose for crying in the literal first 20 minutes of my nineteenth birthday :/ don't think about this fic too hard or you'll see it's more of a diary entry than work of fiction oopsie :')

You weren't feeling very special. To be quite honest, your day had been totally shit. It was your birthday, your nineteenth birthday and everyone had forgotten. Well, that wasn't true exactly, but nobody cared. Your parents had barely said 'happy birthday' when you called them, and only one of your friends had texted you. A sweet message, but still kind of depressing.

You knew it shouldn't have been a big deal, no one cared about nineteen, right? Eighteen was the big birthday and you'd had a good enough day last year, so you weren't really sure why this year had brought you down so much.

Maybe it was just because your love of birthdays was never reciprocated. A person's birthday could be the most exciting day of the year, and you were of the opinion that it should be, if possible. You were the one who showed up with a hand-baked cake on your friend's doorstep, without fail. It was something you enjoyed doing undoubtedly, you spent ages picking out which colour the icing should be and what edible decorations should go on top.

On top of that, you considered your defining talent to be writing cards. It was something you took pride in, penning almost-essays that encapsulated the breadth and depth of your love for your nearest and dearest. Proclamations of never-ending adoration, gratitude for years of friendship, the insides of your heart and soul sitting amongst fresh ink and scribbled hearts. You signed your name with a heart and a flower every time. Plus, you made particular efforts to come up with a creative pun or doodle for the front, just to keep things interesting.

So birthdays were things you held in high regard, and having yours seemingly mean nothing to anyone else was a bit of a mood killer if you were being totally honest. Still, what could you do? You picked yourself up, ate an uninspiring breakfast and went to uni.

You felt more anonymous than usual in class. With the semester having started only a week prior, you were in a sea of new people, none of them having any way of knowing it was your birthday, and you weren't quite at the point where you were begging for well-wishes from people you didn't particularly care about. And so you took notes, put your hand up for the participation grade and dreamed of your own cake and candles.

By the end of the day you were exhausted. The classes were long anyway, but carrying around your own personal grey cloud was taking a toll on your body and mind. It was at the car park when your phone dinged; James.

are you coming over tonight?

please

You smiled a little despite your sour mood. Even if James didn't seem like he was fully aware of your outlook on birthdays, being with him always made you feel better.

It'd already been dark for an hour or so by the time you reached the flat he shared with the boys, the winter weather making the sun disappear at four o'clock. You knocked on his door softly, unable to pluck up the strength to even make your presence easily known. James must've been waiting for you though, since you heard the heavy pad of his feet almost instantaneously.

The sight of him nearly took your breath away, though nothing was out of the ordinary. He was still the same old James, his glasses slightly askew on his nose, but he was looking at you with such softness that you felt the tears spike behind your eyes. You tried to push them down.

"I thought we'd have a bit of an early dinner. I know you won't have eaten at uni." He took your bag, setting it by the entry table softly. You managed to nod, hopefully not giving away all your awful feelings. You tried not to be cut up that he hadn't wished you a happy birthday yet.

All of your melancholy had been for nothing, you realised, when James led you to the dining table. He'd gone the full mile, with a cheesy red tablecloth and single candle as the centrepiece.

"Happy birthday, my love," He whispered, pressing a soft kiss to your temple. You couldn't help it, the tears rolling down your cheeks before you even realised. Once they started you had no chance, sobs wracking through your body as James stood beside you, bewildered.

"Is this not okay? Do you not like it?" He fretted as you cried, and you rushed to reassure him.

"I love it, Jamie, promise. It's just," You managed a half laugh through your bout of tears, "I thought no one cared. I can't believe you've done this for me." James' brow furrowed deeper than you'd ever seen it before as he pulled you into a tight hug.

"I would do anything for you, love. I mean it."

Once your tears had subsided you had a lovely dinner, James making you double over with laughter as all thoughts of your previous shit day dissolved under the weight of the homemade pasta sitting in your stomach.

Just before the night died down, James presented you with a small box, wrapped in the most beautiful silky ribbon. You glanced up at him curiously, untying it slowly. Inside was the most beautiful bracelet you'd ever seen. Connected with a heart-shaped clasp and decorated with a single charm, a love letter. You were embarrassed by the tears working their way back up to your lash line, but James looked delighted by the reaction, he lived to make you happy.

"Thank you," You whispered, "I love you."

James didn't have to say it back for you to know, but he did anyway because it made him happy.

Maybe your birthday wasn't the flashy event you might've wanted, however deep down, but you were strangely okay with it. Despite the fact that no one showed up to your door with a hand-baked cake or essay-length card, you had James, and James would've pulled the stars down from the sky if he thought it would boost your mood. That was enough.

[darth-jess]

GalaxyCon 2024: Meeting Hayden Christensen

I have never been someone who cares about famous people. To clarify: I care about them as human beings, like in a very general sense, the way I'd care about any other person I've never met before. I also don't really care to know much about the personal lives of my favorite famous people. For me, at least, knowing things about them can change the way I look at the characters they play, the music they write, or the art they make. And personally, I like to view these things in my own context, not within someone else's.

Because of this, I have never really become obsessed with any particular famous person. I've become obsessed with their art– their portrayal of a character, their music, their writing, etc… but never with the actual person. Why would I? I've never met them before, I don't know them, I don't know what they're like as real people.

So I never really understood those fangirls who scream or faint or start sobbing when they get to meet the Jonas Brothers or Taylor Swift. I totally did not get it.

Then, I got to meet Hayden Christensen this past weekend at GalaxyCon.

And let me tell you, emotional fangirls, I get it now.

I have never been to a con before, this was my first one ever and honestly I don't think any future con I go to will top this one.

I knew going into it I was going to be a little nervous. After all, even though (as I stated before) I don't really care about the actors who play my favorite characters, I can absolutely appreciate how much their acting affected me, how much the role they played on screen changed my own life, as well as their skill as an artist.

And because Anakin Skywalker has been my favorite character in all fiction since I was 6 years old– and has not changed since then– I was very excited. The only favorite characters I had before Anakin were Darth Vader (when I found out they were the same my 4-year-old brain nearly exploded) and Ariel from The Little Mermaid. I was 3 when The Phantom Menace came out, give me a break.

Anyway.

Waiting in line for the photo op on Saturday gave me so much excited anxiety, I felt light headed and a little sick to my stomach– and the entire time my husband was kind of making fun of me (not in a mean way, mind you, he was making me laugh). I kept telling him, "I'm too nervous, I want to go home!" – which wasn't true, but for some reason I kept saying it.

The photo op was super quick, I remember Hayden saying something nice, like "Nice to meet you" or something like that (or maybe I said that?). I only had time to hand Hayden the Anakin Skywalker replica lightsaber I'd gotten the day before and ask him to hold it! I think he said something else, but I literally don't remember because I sort of blacked out.

I barely remember taking the picture.

Then, later in the day, we waited in line for two hours (it was worth it) to get his autograph and the entire time I was trying to stay calm because I was worried that when we got to him I would just stare at him blankly, unable to say anything.

The line was soooo long, and he was sort of blocked off behind these curtains– I think the curtains are there as much for him as they are for the fans. I imagine if he could've seen how long the line was, he would've wished for Anakin's robotic arm to do all those autographs. I would have, for sure.

When we were ushered through the curtains I could literally feel every single beat of my heart, I could hear it in my brain. I felt lightheaded again, and I turned to my husband and said, "I think my heart is going to explode."

Something I noticed as we got closer was that even though he looked kind of tired, he was still nice to every single person in line and made every interaction special. I have no idea how many autographs he'd already done that day– hundreds at least– and he was still trying to talk to everyone who'd come to see him.

Finally, we got to Hayden and he looked me right in the eyes (and like holy aslkdfj that gaze is intense– NICE, but intense) and he said something like, "How are you today?"

And I said, "I'm good, how are you? It's so nice to meet you!"

I have no idea what he said after that because my heart was beating SO LOUD, but he said something nice in response.

And then I finally remembered what I wanted to tell him, so I said, "Anakin was always my favorite character."

He smiled real big while he was signing our poster, and he said, "Thank you, that means a lot to me!"

I wanted to say more, like:

"How much of yourself do you feel like you put into Anakin's character?" – This is something I'm always curious about, because as a writer I feel like I put so much of myself into my writing.

Or:

"I hope we get to see you in more Star Wars projects!"

Or even just:

"I'm so happy you're getting the recognition you deserve."

But I was honestly lucky I'd been able to speak at all, and at this point, nothing else was coming out. And I was slightly worried that if I spoke again I'd say something weird or not make any sense at all.

So my husband took over, and he held up the photo we'd taken earlier from the photo op and said, "Thanks for making me look like the third wheel!"

And Hayden laughed– he actually laughed– and made some kind of joking reply but I sort of blacked out there too because I was so embarrassed!

Finally, my husband said what I'd really wanted to say, "We're just really happy to see you finally getting the recognition you deserve."

And Hayden smiled and nodded, and said, "Really, thank you guys so much, that means a lot."

And then he shook our hands and said it was nice to meet us, and it was time to go. We walked out, and I had tears in my eyes, my heart was still racing, and my whole body was shaking. I turned to my husband as I held onto his arm and I said, "I literally can't feel my legs."

Moral of the story: Hayden Christensen is literally so nice to his fans, so if you ever get the opportunity to meet him, I highly recommend it. He's not going to remember the interaction, but I guarantee you will for the rest of your life.

Also, don't judge fangirls for getting emotional.

[adviceformefromme]

A little personal note and advice as we wrap up 2024!!

Finally getting some time to myself...Currently in the process of moving apartments so just finding some time now to write and share. It’s been another crazy year. I am always amazed at my life and the things I accomplish each year. The theme for 2024 was definitely healing and wellbeing, and for that I have made transformational change. Some things I did that really made 2024 transformational.

Moved overseas, moved into the apartment that had been occupying my vision board for years. The process to moving overseas started 12 months prior, I went ghost for a few months prayed and meditated every single day asking God for where I should move to (I didn’t know where my vision board home was), I was guided to a location, trialled living there for almost 3 months fell in love, returned home to sort my visa and finally made an official move 1 year later. This was a process of listening to Gods direction and being obedient. I tried to move abroad before and it was truly not in God’s plan, I wasted time, energy and money seeking something that was not for me. Lesson learnt. Listen for God’s direction always. Take action from that place.

I went from having the worst birthday of my entire life last year, to having the best birthday of my entire life this year. The reason I share this is because those dark places you’re in right now can literally be a catapult to your dream life, just like the previous story. In my darkness last year, I swore to have the very best birthday this year. A yacht, girls trip, amazing food, music. I imagined it all, and I did it all. It was incredible. I loved being on the yacht, I loved that I arranged it and I loved that my dreams were possible. I planned this trip from January with friends and at points I thought it wasn’t going to happen, the boat prices were super expensive, the boat I loved didn’t allow food.. But I persisted. I convinced the boat to make an exception. It was truly a magical birthday. And the lesson is to dream big and make plans, even if you don’t have the funds, even if it’s seems wild. You can experience your dream life if you stay focused and committed (time and planning makes this a lot easier).

Walking away from people you care deeply about, for your own wellbeing. There was a particular person in my life who actually transformed me, this connection was one of those that shift the entire direction of your life, they lift the veil and open your eyes to a new way of thinking, of seeing yourself and loving yourself. But these people are like angels that come to help and heal  you, but sadly have to leave when that season is over. And this was the case, I did try to hold on for longer but, every part of me knew my season with this person had past. As painful as this is, walking away means it’s back in God’s hands. By doing this I allow space for alignment, I allowed myself to trust, and stay true. You always know in your heart when you are going against yourself, when you are wanting more than someone can give you, when you are holding on when it’s time to let go. And by being brave, and remaining graceful you can appreciate what was, and welcome more truth.

I invested in my health on a new level. Infra-red sauna and ice bath spa weekly. Removed carbs from my diet. Green juices daily. High protein. Blood works every 12 months. Health checkups. Supplements. Homemade goats milk kefir. Low-tox living. Gym membership. Bi monthly acupuncture. Chiropractor adjustments. Dry body brushing. Weekly bone-broth. Only buying clothing made from natural fibres (linen, cotton, wool). No polyester. Downloaded Yuka app to ensure I am checking the harm rating of products I buy. This transformation has resulted in  a deeper self love and care. I have no desire for alcohol, for anything toxic in my body. This journey started with a health scare last summer and resulted in a complete holistic lifestyle change. It didn’t happen overnight. It’s been a process, and there is still a way to go. But my key takeaway is to continue to educate myself and learn about living better, because every change I have made has enhanced my life on a new level. 

As I wrap up this year, I am reminded that I am responsible for creating the life of my dreams. It’s the efforts I make, the choices - daily. The books I read, the conversations I have, the risks I take. The vison board I stay close to. Listening to God, prayers, actions. The actions are KEY. Next year I plan to go braver and bolder. No dream is too big. 2025 I am coming for you! 

[cy-cyborg]

I'm getting a little tierd of the idea because amputees get more representation in media, it means rep for our disability is better and we "have enough"

People are right, we do have way more rep than really any other disability, im not going to deny that, and ive joked before about how often people write amputees without even realising it. So you would think, by sheer numbers, we should have at least some good representation, but by-and-large that is not the case. Legitimatly, the closest example I can think of to point to of good amputee rep is Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood and even that uses multiple tropes I hate (the miracle cure/quest for the miracle cure, the almost perfect prosthetic replacement/forgetting the chatacter is an amputee until it breaks or needs repairs, refusal to call prosthetics, "prosthetics" (automail), the amputee who can't do anything without a prosthetic) and they call Ed a slur for another disability (m*dget) CONSTANTLY. I love fmab deeply, it legitimatly helped me feel seen and represented as a childhood amputee in a way no other show has even come close to, and when it gets it right, it gets it really right, but it's also very far from great and should not be the best example I can think of. Especially nearly 15 years after it released...

A big part of the reason why I don't read many books anymore is because of the sheer amount of books with downright offensively bad amputee rep, some of which were touted as good by people with other disabilities and were recommended to me as good examples. others times, I wasn't even looking for books with amputee/disability rep, it just popped up. It has ruined one of my childhood hobbies for me. Ive tried to get back into reading again as an adult but it hasn't gotten better in that time i was away. I was kicked out of 3 different scifi writing groups on facebook and reddit for asking people to remember "cybernetic enhancement" users are amputees - a real group of people, and maybe debating weather or not we're less human isnt great, and for pointing out seeing those discussions every day was making me feel pretty unwelcome in that space (yes i know, "real" cyberpunk isnt trying to say that, i had to turn notifications off on my post about the topic, it doesnt change the fact that newer creators in the genre dont seem to get that bit, that ive seen cyberpunk writers in these spaces say that debating weather people who loose more parts of their body were less human was, in fact, their intent but they hadnt even considered the fact this made their chatacters amputees, it doesnt change the fact that these tropes, intentionally or not, help make those spaces hostile for disabled fans/creators, especially amputees).

But yeah, I should be thankful I get more rep than other disabilities, no matter the quality, right?

It doesn't just stop at being me being made uncomfortable, though. The sheer, overwhelming amount of amputee chatacters with "perfect prosthetics" has had a noticeable impact on how we are perceived irl. In my lifetime, the general idea people have about multi-limbed amputees in particular has gone from "literally the worst thing that can happen to a person and the worst disability to have" to "is it even a disability? The prosthetic fixes it". These are both wildly untrue and harmful ideas about my disability that were both perpetuated by media, but now that the second one is taking root, it's causing real problems. I have not been shy in talking about how I have to fight to maintain my NDIS funding every time I get something done with my prosthetics, and had to get my prosthetist to sign off, twice, that my fancy prosthetic knee that costs the same as a higher-end new car ($125,000 AUD) is not, in fact a cure and I still need help with other things. It took me nearly 2 years to get a new wheelchair because they didn't understand why I needed it if I had the prosthetics - which to be honest, is not comfortable for me to wear, let alone use all day every day. Guys this isn't just assholes on the street or on twitter saying dumb shit, it's the people in the government body who decide how much funding I get to help with my disability who beleive it. People who have very real control over my life. It's not entirely the media's fault, but when the sheer, overwhelming majority of representation for people like me confirms that belief, it's hard to ignore the possibility that these portrayals are contributing to it, you know?

Which makes it so frustrating when I come on here and see other disability writing advice blogs saying to not write amputees because they have so much representation already. We do, I can acknowledge that, but the vast, vast majority of it is shit, and no one, not even other disabled people, are listening to us about it. And what makes it even worse, is the people they're advising to not writing amputees are the creators who care enough to be doing the research. They're the ones willing to listen, to ask questions. They could be the start of the positive change. But instead they're advised to not even bother with us.

And don't get me wrong, other disabilities ARE under-represented. There are so many disabilities, including some I have myself, that I've never seen represented as anything other than the butt of a joke. There does need to be more reprentation of disabilities other than amputation and limb differences. 100%! but can you please talk about that without saying "amputees have enough"

This isn't even touching on how amputees/people with limb differences who dont/cant use prosthetics, or even folks who use prosthetics sometimes but not others, are almost never represented unless it's for pitty-porn, or how the non-fictional media's (news outlets, etc) portrayal of amputees in particular is used to justify hurting very real, very vunderable people but this rant is long enough and honestly, ive got enough thoughts to make whole other posts on those subjects. That second one in particular deserves its own (more thought-out) spotlight and shouldn't be a footnote in a frustrated rant post lol.

[singmyaubade]

hi!! i was wondering if you could write a smutty story about sub!james? literally anything, pls🙏🏻

warning: mentions of smut and cursing

sub!james x female!reader

a/n: i did not proofread, i'm sorry if this was not what you were expecting LOL.

james never had any performance issues in his life.

he always managed to be a stallion in bed, giving nothing less and everything more. being a 'sex god,' in his own words, was one of the things he always took pride in.

it was his wings, the only thing that could cheer him up when all else failed.

if quidditch was his first passion, snogging girls was a definite second.

so when ruby weathers, a girl with the best bum in james's year, gives him a chance to sleep with her.

he has no choice but to.

james was ecstatic, practically jumping off of the walls. this was his moment, his opportunity once again to prove himself. there wasn't a single nerve in his body; he never underestimated his more large and not-so-average buddy down there.

before he knew it, he was in his perfect bedroom with weathers, relishing her getting on her knees to suck his cock.

and then, everything came to a halt.

after twenty minutes of her doing that, his buddy refused to get up. he felt the arousal, but his mind and cock were in different places.

after she complained about her jaw locking for the twenty-second time, he decided to get straight to the point. but even when he fucked her, he couldn't get hard.

eventually, ruby just told him awkwardly that it was okay and things clearly weren't working despite him asking her to try a few things. they didn't even exchange last words before she left.

and when she did, he was embarrassed, frustrated, in fact.

he didn't think weathers was the type to tell people's sex business or even gossip for that face.

he knew he was wrong when sirius came urgently yelling, "prongs, your dick is broken?!"

and that was, for sure, the icing on the cake.

he tried everything that didn't involve taking a particular little pill to perform.

he tried spells, teas, and even a massage, but nothing worked. he even thought he was attracted to other things, but it was no point.

eventually, his friends were all sensing his depression. he couldn't even play quidditch properly.

marlene, who felt no sympathy at all, even tried to cheer up james, but it was a loss. he completely lost himself through the entire thing, and yes, it might have been stupid for some people, but it meant a lot to him.

but then dorcas pulled him aside.

"go to the room written here on saturday after lunch," dorcas handed him the card. he looked at her, entirely confused, raising his eyebrow.

"i have a friend who helps with that kind of stuff," she tilted her head, "but don't tell anyone where you are going, and make sure to tell her that i sent you," she instructed to which he nodded and muttered a thank you before dorcas rushed off.

and when saturday after lunch was right there, he didn't know what to do, his fist knocking on your door lightly.

then he saw you, yawning when you opened the door. your hair perfectly laid, wearing a matching pink tank top and shorts that hugged your thighs most comfortably. your nipples were perked up through your tank top, making him swallow.

"eyes are up here, pretty boy." you tased as his face grew red.

"m’sorry," he stuttered, "i was told to uh- i mean, dorcas sent me here."

you looked at him questioningly, "and why did she do that?" you asked, pursing your lips.

"she said you could help me with my uh problem," he whispered, looking around.

"golden boy having a problem that i have to fix?" you tsked, smirking, "interesting." you moved aside to let him, walking to your own bed.

he took that opportunity to look at your ass which was 'bloody fantastic,' he thought. he stood there gawking at you, not knowing if he should come in.

"you coming in or?" you flattered, to which he came in immediately, shutting the door.

he stood there like a scarecrow before you giggled, "come sit with me," you patted the spot next to you on the bed.

he nervously fiddled with his fingers as you placed your hand on his hand to calm him down, "what problems are you having?"

he stayed silent, clearly embarrassed, "james," you grabbed his chin so he looked at you, "i'm here to help you, not judge you,"

he took a deep breath, "i am having trouble during sex."

"what kind of problems?" you asked, using your thumb to brush his fingers.

"i can't get hard," he admitted, looking down.

he was prepared for you to laugh, even mock him for having such a stupid problem, but you still maintained a compassionate face.

"okay," you said, "and when did you start having that problem," you asked.

"two weeks ago," he muttered.

"and have you tried anything new? maybe something new in your sex life?" you suggested.

"i've tried everything i can think of; it's just not happening." he was frustrated.

"okay then let's try everything you haven't thought of." you half-joked.

"like what?" he asked, making eye contact with you.

"hmm," you tapped your chin, "first things first, are you more dominant or submissive?"

"uh," he said, genuinely not knowing.

"okay that's fine, i'll find out," you replied, sounding sure.

"and are you okay with being intimate with me?" you asked.

he could feel his face turning bright red, "y-yeah that's fine, i mean if you are fine with it but if you're not, its okay, i do-"

you kissed him, cutting him off. your tongue entangling his, hand on his thigh. you grabbed his hand, putting it on your breast as his other hand went to your cheek.

you pulled away from him as he whimpered, "what do you want me to do, james?" you asked.

"i don't know," he answered, drunk off your lips.

"can i suck you off, baby?" you asked, your eye contact ripping him into pieces.

"y-yes." he answered nervously as you got onto your knees.

you touched his belt, unbuckling it as you reached up to kiss him one last time. you palmed him through his boxers, not feeling him get hard yet, but you were patient.

you pulled him soft out of his boxers, stroking him fully. he was big even soft which you admit made you dripping in your panties.

your tongue did a long stripe on his cock, making him moan. you sucked on his tip first, putting your hand on his thigh as his hand palmed into a fist.

you put him deeper in your mouth, letting him hit the back of your throat as he whined. you grabbed his hand, unfisting it, interlocking your hand in his.

you continued bobbing your head up and down his length, your other hand stroking whatever you couldn't fit in your mouth.

james continued holding your hand, holding it tighter when you sucked his tip.

"is it good, jamie?" you asked, breathing a bit hard.

"so good," he whimpered.

that's when you finally felt him getting hard, when you talked to him.

"you are doing so well for me," you complimented, "you are being so good."

he groaned at your words as you continued sucking him off, him being fully erect now.

"so big," you managed to say with his cock inside your mouth.

his cock twitched inside your mouth and you knew he was near when he gripped your hand tightly.

"you can do it," you muffled through his cock, the vibrations sending him.

james closed his eyes, leaning his head back before cumming inside of your mouth.

"i wanna kiss you," he whined as you smiled, kissing him with his cum inside of your mouth as it slobbed over both of your chins.

your mouth invaded his as he moaned inside of your mouth. his hands touched your top, tugging at it. you could tell that he wanted it off of you.

"you wanna take off my top for me, jamie?" you asked as he nodded.

you let him take your top off as you straddled his lap, him latching on your nipple as soon as he could which earned a moan from you. his spit all over your chest, your nipples swollen.

you raised off of him for a second to take off your shorts as he looked at you in awe with his big, brown eyes.

you straddled him again, aligning his cock with your hole. he continued sucking on your nipple as you sat down on him and he groaned.

"fuck," you said, "stretching me out."

he was hardening inside of you again, getting drunk off of your pussy.

he whimpered as he hit the spongy spots inside of you. you started a slow speed and once it stopped stinging, you went faster.

he held onto your body tightly, not letting you go. he mewled the faster you went, his cock twitching inside of you due to the immense pleasure.

"so needy baby," you moaned, bouncing up and down.

he hit the perfect spot inside of you as you tried not to grow hazed in pleasure.

"i can't hold it in, mommy." he said, you being a bit surprised at his wording.

"it's okay baby," you soothed, "you can cum." you smoothed the back of his hair.

you kept riding him until he came, not worried about your release. he came with a whimper, sensitive.

"i wanna taste you mommy," he groaned with you still inside of him as he softened inside of you.

"next time jamie, this was for you right now," you grinned, kissing him delicately on his lips.

you tried letting him go but his grip on you was still there, not wanting you to leave.

"i'm not gonna go anywhere," you calmed, him still inside of you.

"i just wanna cuddle for a while," he said.

"okay, we can do that." you gave him a reassuring smile, laying the both of you down, entangled in each other as you gave a peck to his nose.

your eyes fluttered closed as james admired you.

and before he slept, he knew that he definitely owed dorcas his life.

[themonochromaticcat]

Lilies and Tulips!

>Pairing- Joost x Reader

>Genre- tooth-rotting fluff

>warnings- none?

Summary! Joost and reader go for a picnic but end up going flower picking and reader explains the hidden meanings behind certain flowers 🌷 :3

Notes! Nothing much but tooth rotting fluff, reader and Joost are in an established relationship, long term. Reader is bi and a past gf is mentioned- like once.

A/N! Oh em gee!!1!1!!!! I am literally on a writing spree so that means I’m gonna get writers block soon 😒 anyways enjoy per usual!

Blue = Joost

Pink = reader

It was a beautiful, sunny day when the two of you decided to go flower picking in the nearby park for a little date. The date was an out of the blue thing as the Dutch weather was and still is known locally for being unpredictable so the two of you were going to make the most of it. And so, the two of you picked your favourite park in the area, quickly packed a picnic basked and went out.

Luckily, the weather held up letting the two of you enjoy a nice evening outside, having a little date.

“Mmh, thank god the weather’s holding up, it’s like a once in a lifetime opportunity!”

A small giggle left the both of your lips as Joost passed you the sandwich the two had a fuss whilst making all over the toppings, typical Joost.

“Oh, I know right! I feel zalig, holy even.” (zalig=blessed)

A light chuckle escaped from the both of your lips, you knew you wanted to savour this moment, the both of you were extremely lucky in your life. Both in your love life and your career, you led a successful career in the department you were in; letting you do things like this almost daily. While Joost, you already knew- everyone did: he was a celebrity, from being unfairly disqualified landing him in the spotlight, good and bad. Though, the two of you were heavily great full for his extremely supporting fan base, letting the two of you live in peace without the fear of being ostracised.

The two of you noticed that the park was fairly empty, so it meant that you could enjoy it a bit more: a few kisses here and there wouldn’t hurt anyone, would it? And so, you looked at Joost to check whether he was comfortable enough knowing that the paparazzi could and probably would snap a few photos. Luckily so, he was completely fine with it.

You took your cue and placed a few pecks on his face, a small smile on your face as you did so. Once you started pulling away, Joost lunged forward and pulled you into a long, fulfilling kiss; your lips interlocked, your hands got hold of his long luscious hair whilst his hands snaked around your hips, pulling you closer. You two felt interlinked, interlinked didn’t even feel like a strong enough descriptor for how the two of you felt!

By the time the two had started packing away, Joost’s phone started blowing up with notifications, which was really aggravating to the both of you. So, you suggested to go flower shopping at the local florist’s as you needed some new flowers as the ones in your vase had to been thrown away the other day as they had died.

Once the two of you arrived at the florist’s you were greeted by a great smile and lots of positivity from the cashier, one who you had grown close to across the years. You had started to come to this particular florist when you were with your lying, cheating ex! Thankfully you caught onto her actions but you knew that Joost wouldn’t ever do something as diabolical as her.

The two of you wandered around the packed shelves, Joost teasing you by pressing gentle kisses on your neck here and there when you weren’t paying attention. You and Joost were often viewed as a picture-perfect couple, and they couldn’t be more right! It was clear that the bond between you two was quite literally unbreakable which was the reason that the media tried stirring lots of rumours up, just because they were jealous.

Once you picked up a bouquet of Lilies and Tulips up, you handed them to Joost, unsure if he knew the symbolism behind them.

“Do you know what it means? You know… the flowers?”

You looked at him, a giddy smile as blush crept onto your cheeks; it felt like you were a teenager once again, hiding under the bleachers trying not to get caught by any teachers. A response you were anticipating from him, more preferably verbal but instead he lightly shook his hand before pressing his lips onto yours. Until he pulled away, properly responding, and so, wish a hushed voice he spoke.

No, schat, what does it mean?

A long deep breath escaped your lips, you didn’t even feel it and yet you were so stressed about telling him this even though you two had been together for the longest time, at least that’s what it felt like. It’s not that you were complaining though. You had gulped before speaking, practically ranting, explaining that the flowers represented deep requited love; exactly what the two of you had felt over the time that you were together.

“So, uhm, that’s what they mean. What a cringe-fest, hm?”

I let out a small laugh at my self deprecating joke to see him looking at me, tilting his head in confusion before speaking.

“Cringe? You’re just expressing your love, lieverd.”

You looked at him with starry eyes before pressing your lips onto his as a little thank you for his positive affirmations; his own lips locking onto yours, pulling himself even closer to yourself. You were going to continue the kiss, but you realised that the cashier was probably uncomfortable with the amount of pda you two were doing. And so, you gently picked up the bouquet and enveloping his hand, taking him to the counter.

“Just these please.”

Your voice sounded heavenly to Joost, he was definitely going to ask you to do some adlibs in his song some time soon. He watched with content as you conversed with the cashier; leaning onto you, his head now on your shoulder. After a few minutes you placed a small kiss onto Joost’s face before saying your goodbyes to the cashier. You gently tugged at his hand, making sure that he knew you were going.

Once the two of you had the florist’s, you placed another kiss on his face, now on his nose, your favourite place to kiss him.

“I thought that you were going to fall asleep there baby, how about we get home and have a nice night in before it starts chucking it down.”

A small giggle left his lips as he carried the bouquet of flowers in his hand, the other now wrapped around your waist.

I <3 leafeon y’all 😔