#and i have 7k in june

[anchoeritic]

hi lovelies, just wanted to pop in and say that there’s 7 thousand of you now?? that’s so mind blowing, i can’t even process 100.. let alone, 7 THOUSAND?

thank you from the bottom of my heart. you’ve made writing so fun for me even though it’s just porn on a page but i genuinely love you all so so much.

sending kisses & hugs your way.

— kells. ♥︎

[vampiricgf]

WATER SONG [PT. 1]

merman leon x gov't researcher reader

word count : 7k+

warnings : female reader, reader has a sort of type A personality and some mild anger issues, talk of medical experiments, he's referred to as a subject and specimen quite a lot, descriptions of predatory behavior (animal kind, not the sexual kind), slow pace, sfw, lots of yearning for touch

okay part one isn't terribly exciting im sorry ajdgakab I just wanted to establish a connection between the reader and him in the setting n such before developing any deeper connection. also like 1% research went into this so im sorry if you're knowledgeable about oceanic research this'll probably piss you off lmao. also all credit for this au idea goes to @/bunnivievve tysm for letting me write a lil interpretation of your idea! this was inspired by this post of theirs as well ‹𝟹

JUNE

Subject Zero. 

Male, combined characteristics of humanoids and aquatic species. Captured by a trawling vessel, out in deep waters usually traversed by cargo freighters but occasionally by commercial fishing vessels. A freak happenstance. When the net had been dredged up in a fantastic spray of salt water, the hoard of tuna quickly spilling into the sorting containers, the men on deck had spotted something much larger than white fin tuna thrashing in the net. 

Upon careful inspection they feared they’d pulled up a man, some poor unfortunate victim of a seafaring disaster. A capsized or otherwise destroyed vessel, a near drowning victim that had fallen overboard perhaps. 

Until they spotted the flashing of sharp teeth, and the thick, muscled tail slamming against the wet metal under their feet. 

Thankfully their transmission to the Coast Guard was intercepted, a naval craft catching the broadcast and setting course as fast as possible for the trawler. 

And now Subject Zero finds respite in your “office”. If an office can be counted as more of an observation space, nevertheless. A part of you feels bad, the less scientifically trained and inclined part that is, for keeping such a clearly intelligent creature within a tank inside a black site. The initial placement had been… difficult. It was clear the subject missed the open ocean, and you did feel sorry that it had been so unceremoniously plucked from its home and deposited in such an alien space on land. But there was nothing to be done about it. 

He was far too valuable as a research opportunity. The cold, clinical part of your mind understood that. He was a marvel of nature, flesh and blood proof that man could be intermixed with seafaring species, it was one of the single greatest events in modern marine biology. And an immense privilege for you, the scientist chosen chiefly to study the subject. 

A dream. The government all but telling you to do whatever you deemed necessary, no concern over the expense. Gone were worries of securing grant funding for more piddling projects or the endless anxiety of thinking you would be stuck as one name in an endless list of names relegated to ordinary oceanic study. Not that your peers' works weren’t valuable, but you always held the selfish desire for notoriety. Had dreamed endlessly throughout your undergraduate program of the day your name would be the one filling up library indexes and publications with impressive, weighty studies. Discoveries so undeniable you would join the ranks of the most noteworthy in the field. 

And seemingly, your wish had been granted. Subject zero would be the gravel that paved your road to success. It’s just a pity it has to be such an intelligent creature. 

You sit back, uncuring from your hunched position at the desk, rolling your shoulders and wincing as you hear your joints popping. Documentation was a never ending pain in the ass but it had to be done, if you wanted to keep the convenience of not having to answer to nor justify your expenses to an overhead department. Ordinarily that work would be relegated to a lower priority researcher, but you preferred being able to sign off on it all yourself, comforted by the fact that there were no unforeseen surprises lurking in the documents or spreadsheets or data tables. Nothing anyone would be about to point out as a discrepancy, leaving you humiliated and floundering. 

As you close your eyes you can feel it, the hair on the back of your neck slightly on edge. The feeling of being observed. 

He seemed to prefer watching you when your back was turned or if you were otherwise unaware. If you were facing the ten foot thick glass of the massive elcousure he would recede into the farthest corners of it, shying away into watery obscurity. In a way it was cute, an obvious curiosity for the beings around him but he seemed stricken by shyness, didn’t know if you were trustworthy. Which was understandable. You were the one keeping him there, at least to his limited viewpoint. The one that denied him reentry into his former home. 

That irritatiningly scentimental part of your mind whispered to you again. 

What if he thinks you’re cruel?

So what? We don’t even know to what extend he does think. 

You say that but you do care, at least a little. Thats why you sneak him extra food. 

You sigh to yourself, pushing up from the familiar desk, palms flat on its slick glass surface before rising to your full height. Out of the corner of your eye you catch the white coat you don most of the day, every day, slung carelessly over the back of another chair at a separate station. Your badge attached via a shiny, silvery little clip. Walking over you purposefully keep your eyes directed away from the elcousure, your movements slow. This is a good opportunity to see how long he’ll watch you as long as he believes you aren’t paying attention. 

The badge is solid, though lightweight as you pick it up, bringing it closer to your face. It’s hard to believe you look so excited in the small picture in the upper lefthand corner. Your name in bold typeface as last name, first name all neatly lined up next to the photo. In it’s reflection you can see him, one hand perched against the glass, that thick midnight blue tail swishing up and down in a soft, rhythmic motion as he stays still. Ever watchful. 

Its hard to see in the little reflective glimpse but subject zero does have more… handsome features. You smile to yourself, recalling one of the other researchers giggling while telling you it wasn’t weird to note that because it was true. What man on land, with two legs, had eyes that shade of blue or a jawline that impressive? None that aren’t using photoshop or filters. 

Maybe if the discovery of the subject was publicized there would be throngs of people banging on doors trying to find out where he’s being kept. It did make you huff out a laugh, the idea that a half fish man who couldn’t speak was more appealing than the majority of men on earth. 

Maybe we should open an instagram page for him. 

You shake your head to yourself, still smiling, as you set the badge down. 

The office slash observation room remained quiet save for the occasional sound of sloshing water. It was late, well past time fo anyone other than the usual armed military guard to be roaming the facility. Well past time for you to go home. 

At that moment you turn, just enough to peek over your shoulder and as soon as your eyes fix on the spot he occupied all you catch is a low flash of dark blue, retreating into the shadowy depths encased in glass. 

~

OCTOBER

Three months of observation. 

Hardly enough to form any evidence based conclusions, but enough time to get started on the right path. You had approximately nintey days of solid data on his diet, his presenting condition each day, endless notes on his observable physiology. He preferred deep water fish, clearly an omnivore as he also didn’t mind the addition of oceanic plant species mixed with the fish when it was introduced into the tank. In fact he seemed to greatly enjoy the sudden introduction of variety, although still preferred to eat his meals in a semblance of solitude. 

His distrust was only natural, you had to remind yourself. Until such time as he’s fully used to his new environment you’re unlikely to observe any great variation in his behavior. 

At least he wasn’t showing signs of aggression. That had been a legitimate concern, and still was, of course. All proper safety precautions were followed to the letter when it came to subject zero, and absolutely no one was to physically get in the tank, not until further tests could be done on his temperament and how he reacted to certain stimuli both pleasant and unplseant. 

You grimace seeing a newly sent email notification, the little computerized ding signalling that your attention was required. 

When isn’t it?

You put the sleek desktop into split screen mode, keeping the charts on the subject to the left while your email opened to occupy the right side. Amid the usual low importance emails from general staff there was a new one, at the very top. The name made your stomach twist in preparation of the message. Dr. Gregg had, for lack of a better phrase, a raging hard on for the opportunity to remove the subject from the tank and getting it into a smaller one in order to sedate and extract genetic material. It didn’t matter that he’d already been sedated and had samples drawn when he was initially transported here, no. The good doctor wanted more than that, but you couldn’t accommodate the request in good conscience. 

Or rather, you were worried about the effect it would have on him. It could set back the last nintey days of progress, or worse, inspire severe mistrust and heightened aggression towards all researchers. There was no way, even with sedation, that cutting into him wouldn’t cause pain. And a source of pain that a creature like subject zero had no way of understanding would only lead to problems. 

The two of you had been butting heads over the issue for the last week, culminating in an argument yesterday where you all but told him to get fucked. You were the lead on this, you made the decisions and he wasn’t going to usurp your authority. Your credit. 

But as your eyes scan the email you can feel yourself getting physically hot, your blood pressure threatening to rise. 

You may be the lead, the head researcher on this project, but do not believe for one moment that I will not go above your head. You are not CIA, doctor. You don’t call the final shots here, and it would do you well to remember that. Whatever your personal feelings on subject zero, you cannot stand in the way of necessary elements that better out understanding of the creature. 

With shaking fingers you close the window, not bothering to respond and not trusting yourself to either. Every fiber of your being wanted nothing more than to march down that hallway and wring his wiry old turkey neck. Who does he think he is? He’s just some physiologist, some ancient fuck. Who is he to threaten you? If his contributions were so invaluable wouldn’t he have been made lead?

You squeeze your eyes shut, hands clenching in your lap as you breathed deeply in through your mouth and out through your nose. The meditation app you’d been using had provided you with some useful tools, being that your temper had plagued you since you were small. Always the first to fly off the handle at even the idea you could be questioned, your competence or credibility casted in doubt. 

Inferiority complex, a nasty voice giggled in your head. 

It’s not that it wasn’t true, and it was a bit of an achilles heel for you. But what took priority now was holding Gregg back, keeping him away from the subject and minimizing the risk that he could fuck it all up before you even had a chance to really begin. So, once you felt that initial flashpoint of rage quelling you reopened the email application, setting your shoulders back as you began typing. 

Under no circumstances are you permitted to sedate nor perform any surgical procedures on subject zero. You have not been given any formal authorizations, so it would do you well to remember not to threaten your head researcher in the contents of easily retrievable emails. You are free to broach the topic with any superior officer on sight, and I am more than happy to entertain a line of questioning from said superior officers on why I do not believe it to be prudent at this juncture to allow for another extraction of material. Research is not a race, Doctor. 

You can’t help but smile smugly to yourself, imagining his fury at opening your reply. If he thinks just because you’re young that you’re easily pushed around he is sorely mistaken. Nothing and no one is allowed to jeopardize the most important work you may ever do. 

With that you abandon the desk, it’s dull and mind numbing work, in favor of standing in front of the tank yet again. It was nice, having a portion of it extending into this area as an offshoot of the main tank where all the feeding and the bulk of physical testing was done. He seemed to enjoy it too, which despite yourself you did place some importance on. 

It was important to ensure he was as comfortable as possible. He was still a living being, despite his status as a research subject, and you took no pleasure in the idea of him suffering in any way. It was definitely a slight drawback, you could begrudgingly admit, that you tended to get… overly attached to the species in your care. You’d done the same in both undergrad and postdoc, although it was more important than ever before to keep a tight hold on those tendencies now. 

How would you feel, if you knew that man was so hell bent on slicing you open? 

Probably afraid. 

What are you feeling now?

It would be so much easier if he were capable of speech. The bridges that had to be built between what was known and unknown had to come from the very foundations, things that required occasionally unpleasant experiences in order to build their understanding of him. But if he could just explain some of it, that would be easier. A half formed bridge is faster to finish than one from scratch. 

Uselessly you peered into the clear, clean water. Between swaying stalks of plants there was nothing to see except the seemingly endless expanse of water. Several mind boggling tonnes of it, all kept nicely contained in ten foot thick military grade glass. Bulletproof. Shatter proof. Even if subject zero were to ram it with intent, crack it even, it would still hold. 

You couldn’t help but wonder, as you remained staring through that glass, if he was lonely. Seeing so many strange, upright walkers but being unable to even touch them, even consider the act of doing it. 

As you frown at your own reflection, you feel it again. 

Duel observation.

~

It was bizarre, to him. These two legs, tall men. He knew they existed, they’d always known a different sort of being lived on the land, domineered it and then took to making attempts at dominating the sea as well. It had all become so noisy, so very nearly unbearable thanks to their hulking monstrosities of shining metal and the things they constantly kept dumping into the water.

Every day there were new threats to avoid. Long gone were the days of simply worrying about other predators lurking in the open waters or within the sediment and foliage. 

He hadn’t seen the net, as they called it, until it was too late. Had been too caught in the euphoria of finding such a gigantic school of gorgeous, meaty tuna, that his mind switched off to everything but pure instinct as he’d circled them quickly, calculatedly. His jaw had felt the ache of hunger so viscerally it was like the bones themselves were vibrating with it. 

And then they’d all begun moving. Swept up, trapped in an upward drag that he’d been powerless to fight against while overwhelmed by the wriggling, frantic fish flashing across his vision, no way to know what was forwards or backwards, up or down. 

Then the shock of air. His lungs had seized up painfully with it, the feeling of being constricted by nothing at all yet everything all at once had been horrific, beyond frightening. 

After that it was too messy, too jumbled in his mind. Harsh sounds, their sounds, were prevalent in his memory but just beyond his grasp. Far too loud without the water to act as a buffer between, softening the blows of each reverberation against his eardrums. 

But her sounds were different. Or, it was that she didn’t make many to begin with. The look of them all was mostly similar from behind the thick material they kept him in, in this unknown space. At least they offered readily available food, although not nearly what he was used to hunting for himself and his webbed fingers itched at the thought of clawing through water in pursuit of some darting piece of prey. It would feel so, so good to sink his teeth into flesh, to feel it rip and catch in chunks between his teeth, the iron rich scent of blood swirling around. The roar of adrenaline in his ears. 

It was difficult to keep his focus on much here, save for her. The best parts were when the others disappeared but she would still be in that corner, down the long corridor of water and he would be able to see her, sitting and doing wholly alien things with her hands at something large and flat, but vaguely shiny. Hers didn’t have webbing, none of them did from what he could tell. How did they ever swim competently? 

She was softer than the rest and he enjoyed watching her do her strange tasks, sometimes she would pace around holding a sheet of paper in her hands, chewing on her bottom lip. Her teeth didn’t seem all that sharp, since she never seemed worried about cutting her flesh on them. What did they eat, with useless teeth? 

Just like at the present moment, with her back turned it was easier to look at her fully. Usually he wouldn’t approach openly like this, unsure of the intentions of everyone here, but this space seemed to be reserved for her only which put him at ease. That and none of those harsh spotlights were present, if anything she seemed to prefer it half dark which was fine by him, preferable to that loud bright area behind him back through the water corridor. But she seemed tense, the set of her shoulders curled forward, almost in on herself. Something in front of her was clearly upsetting and in some odd way he felt offense on her behalf. She was kind, gave him extra food before she would disappear through the night, always seemed to be keeping a close watch over him and how the others were with him. 

He may not be able to speak, but he’s pretty sure she was the reason he wasn’t suffering in this place. And that was good enough, at present, to make him feel a sense of kinship with her. Closeness. 

As she carried on with whatever it was that kept her so occupied his mind wandered to what it would feel like to touch her. They seem to enjoy touch, most of them being very casual with the way they interacted. How did she like being touched? Or would she dislike being touched by him outright? Would she find his webbed, clawed fingers disgusting, would she flinch away?

He frowned behind the glass. Hopefully not, but there really was no way to know. They seem intent on keeping a wide distance from him, which wasn’t unwelcome. The only one he was at all curious about was her anyway, not that he would purposely antagonize anyone who ventured inside his new domain, though he certainly wouldn’t circle them like one of the friendly, if a little dumb, nurse sharks do occasionally out in open water. 

He was so caught up in that worry he nearly failed to catch her movement, but his reflexes are faster than hers. Before she could approach the glass fully he’d already retreated a safe distance away. Watching as she stared into the expanse of water, her face unreadable but the set of her eyebrows told him she felt some kind of stress, strain. 

His fingers twitched at his sides, thinking about reaching out to touch her again.

~

You smile to yourself, a soft hidden kind, at the now familiar feeling. It was like there was a strange sense of understanding between you two, although you could just be ascribing things to him he doesn’t possess. Thats always something to keep in mind, as a researcher but more often than not lately you’re coming to resent that line of thought. It was clear subject zero was intelligent. Maybe not to the degree of a human being, but he was close enough evolutionarily speaking, that he was like a cousin in the chain. An offshoot of the formerly solidly established line of human life. Theres no reason, as yet identified, that he wouldn’t be able to communicate if given the chance to learn how. 

You aren’t thinking of him as a subject anymore. That’s dangerous. 

You know it is, know that voice is right. But it doesn’t account for everything. The odd push and pull, hide and seek game you two play here in this office every single evening. Its to the point now that you feel tense, uncomfortable if you don’t sense him behind you, watching you work or pace around nonsensically. You’ve spent over an hour before reading and rereading the same observational notes and data sets because you kept grinning to yourself like a fool feeling those eyes burning holes in your back. 

He’d even made appearances in your dreams a handful of times over the last month, flashes of deep, endless blue that clung to the soft corners of your mind as you went about your morning routines, ruminating over his appearance as steam from your coffee curled around your hands, ghostly fingers clawing at the air. Tension crept up your beck, spreading out over the tops of your shoulders and trapezius muscles prompting you to stretch against the back of your office chair, rolling your joints and hearing their familiar cracking in response to hours of sustained poor posture. Lazily you grasp your phone from the desk, thumbing open the music app and scrolling a bit through your shuffle playlist before settling on something bubbly, but easily tuned into the background. 

You wonder if he enjoys music, what his preferences would be if he could swipe through your library of songs. It makes you smile to yourself thinking about it, maybe that would make for a good test of his thinking abilities, how he responds to different genres, different artists. Standing, you bend slightly to make a quick note on a half discarded sticky tab: musical testing?

And suddenly a somewhat mad thought grips you, what if you tried right now? Whats the worst that could happen, he lurks in the background while you sway around the dim office like a fool? At least the only people who could see would be the guards, not that they’d say anything either beyond thinking to themselves that every researcher here must be insane. That makes your smile grow wider, giggling to yourself a bit as you take slight steps in time with the beat, giving a little spin on your toes to face the take. 

It only somewhat shocks you to find yourself face to face with him, that he hasn’t retreated to the safety of the shadowy corners. His eyes, a remarkably similar color to the water surrounding him, track your movements with abject curiosity as you follow an imaginary path, one foot placed delicately in front of the other to carry your body with the faint sound of the music. All the while his eyes never stray from you, even when he has to move to keep you in his sights, even when you come right up to the glass and offer a little spin in front of him, giggling to yourself a little more freely now. 

And to your amazement, at your laughter, he smiles. He smiles and it makes your chest feel light, like a ten pound weight you hadn’t even been aware of was finally lifted off. Some might find his fanged appearance frightening, to you it was boyishly cute. A toothy little grin, the tips of his elongated enscisors catching against his bottom lip, and his thick, muscular tail began to move. As if, had he possessed legs like yours, they would be moving in tandem with you. 

It felt like a genuine breakthrough, making you hug your arms around yourself as you stopped moving, still laughing and feeling just a tad bit lightheaded. He genuinely smiled at you. 

He was moving with you. 

That was a major breakthrough, even if just a personal one. Increased rapport meant things would be easier going forward, for both of you. 

With a contented sigh you pressed one hand to the smooth, icy surface of the glass, your fingers stretching over the sleek glass and he does something that makes your breath freeze in your lungs. Gingerly, the way people stretch out their hands to scared animals, inch by inch his own rases to be a perfect mirror of your own. One larger, webbed, hand pressed to the glass right behind your own. It felt silly but you were too afraid to even exhale with any effort, for fear even the barest noise would ruin the moment and he would flee right back into the far corners, beyond your reach. 

But he doesn’t, doesn’t stop holding your gaze for a single second and you marvel at the way his blonde hair sways in the water, like the finest strands of silk-

“So, thats why you keep refusing to allow any progress of this “research”?”

You nearly jump out of your skin at the voice from behind you, a signature grating tone you could pick out anywhere. As your head snaps to the side, body following the movement only a second after, you see him standing in the door way with his arms crossed nearly reeking of smugness. 

Fuck. 

~

One week. 

You have one week to figure out what to do. 

After shattering your late night revelation with subject zero, who has been increasingly attached to you ever since, the resident pain in your ass physiologist had made sure to fire off emails riddled with concerns and accusations addressed to the operatives truly in charge of the site. Questions of your ability to continue in any capacity with the project, the nature of your relationship to the subject, insinuating you had some kind of perverse intention, even going so far as to insult your credibility. Not only cc-ing yourself but “mistakenly” sending those emails to every person working on site.

It had effectively turned you into a pariah with regards to your peers. Whispers of conversation that would be cut off as soon as you set foot into a room. Strange looks from your coworkers, ranging from disgust to perverse curiosity. It felt like you were continuously on fire, every minute of every day. There would be a meeting in one weeks time, and until then you were relegated to nothing but the paperwork in your office, per the tense instructions given to you.

But your panic had less to do with your professional reputation, surprisingly, and more to do with feeling very nearly physically sick when you recalled how fixated he was with the idea of getting to cut into subject zero. If you were removed completely from this project there would be no one else to act as a roadblock, to keep that from happening. 

Your eyes slide over to the observation tank, noting the worried way he’s been watching you for hours now. You wished you could haul him out of there, explain what was happening, the risk of what could happen to him. Maybe he would have some idea of how you both could get out of this. But was there any way out? Or is the only option allowing yourself to become a laughingstock, a professional embarrassment and to allow subject zero to languish in whatever horror would surely be inflicted on him? 

You can’t say if desperation is the only thing motivating you, but your mind becomes mostly blank as you leave the office. Its early enough, after you’d been practically climbing up the walls all night, so maybe the choice was fueled by sleep deprivation. Whatever the case may be, you find yourself moving as if through a dream: down the cavernous corridors, turning and twisting to follow the slate grey concrete all the way to the impossibly large main observation chamber. 

With a swipe of your ID card, forcefully and defiantly, the locks give a little beep before disengaging. Mechanically you make your way to where the suits are stored. Specially designed, one of a kind. Made of an interwoven, enmeshed material not unlike chainmail to prevent sharp teeth from being able to puncture both cloth and flesh, and featuring only the best in terms of diving design. The manufacturer had created them after winning a defense contract from the governenment and you wonder if they ever would have guessed someone would be stripping and tugging the suit on in order to come face to face with something most people would assume only existed in a fairytale. 

But here you are: yanking and adjusting the suit before prepping the oxygen tank, also designed to be compact but sacrificing the amount of time one could spend fully submerged at any depth. Either way it would work for this application, although no one had been given clearance to dive yet. 

You knew doing this would come back to bite you far worse than just those vendetta fueled emails. Diving without any clearance, using untested equipment. It was beyond insane. But the circumstances felt insane enough on their own to justify it. Subject zero was overwhelmingly likely to be just as intelligent as you were, and just as likely to feel physical and mental distress in similar ways. Trying to communicate was step one and what better way than face to face. Then you could form step two: proving beyond a reasonable doubt that he was intelligent and thus, could be advocated for medically even if he couldn’t advocate for himself. 

That was the only way to halt the now speeding train of decisions being made on his behalf and without his input. If he could even write out the most barebones statement, even that would work to prove they needed consent to continue with any of this. Tomorrow you could wake up in a whole new world, one where there is technically a second legal classification of human being, one with a tail and gills. The though made you smile despite the tense circumstances. 

What you were doing was a halfcocked, absolutely batshit attempt at a hail mary but it was worth a shot. Your reputation was already in tatters on site, how much worse could it be? If you fail in this all that happens is you’re dismissed and removed from the site, doomed to be a whispered footnote for future researchers. Did you ever hear about the lady that went crazy with one of the subjects? A cautionary tale about getting too attached to your work. 

But fuck that. If you’re not at least a little attached to your work then do you even really care at all about any of it? You would argue that the resident physiologist holds no love for the work, only a love for the idea of something else experiencing pain.

With a deep breath you sit carefully on the steel ledge that runs the length of the tanks open ceiling. Easy, you just flip backwards and hit the water, reorient yourself and try not to get eaten by one potentially pissed off subject. Yeah, a real piece of cake. With that you decide theres no more time to waste, it’s probably already flagged in the system that you accessed the main deck, they’ll be here any minute. 

Good, that means they can all see I’m not insane or inappropriate. He can comprehend things just like we can, the music wasn’t a fluke. 

In the span of a second your worldview dips, swirls, and the splash of water hits your ears at the exact same moment the shock of cold does. The water is kept at approximately the same temperature as the water he was captured in, frigid Atlantic delights. As bubbles envelop you, you manage to get yourself turned right side up, carefully circling your arms to tred water and remain mostly stationary. This would be the key moment, you have to exercise extreme caution. 

You’re another predator that has invaded the territory of a fellow predator. In the natural world, it’s a killable offense. But you keep your eyes open, sweeping the dimly lit, wide expanse of saltwater around you. No sign of him, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t here, watching you, gauging the situation. As you continue to keep your breathing even, your movements slow enough but steady enough to keep your body afloat, you catch sight of something in your peripheral. That intimately familiar midnight blue tail. He was moving behind you now, one webbed, clawed hand slicing through the water like knives as the rest of him came into your view. That sandy, dishwater blonde hair floating in fine tendrils around his face, framing piercing blue eyes that took you in critically, curiously. 

You allow him to keep circling you, doing your best to calm your nervous system that felt on high alert, panic just on the cusp of overriding your sensibilities. Allowing that would spell disaster, you would certanly be killed if you started thrashing or spinning wildly, it would scare him, you could both be injured in any kind of violent altercation. They would kill him if he killed you. 

But your worries abate as he slows to a stop in front of you, and despite your eyes staying locked together you’re conscious of the audience you have on the other side of the glass. The feeling of being watched by many people is something quite unique, it’s also unnerving. You wish you could apologize to him, you hadn’t realized before how uncomfortable literally living beneath a microscope was. 

You raise your arm, hand extended, in a painfully slow movement that makes the muscles in your forearm ache. His attention goes to the appendage now how hanging between you two, eyeing it with equal parts suspicion and what seems to be excitement. The physical equivalent of a high pitched alarm happens in your body as he moves closer to you, the air suddenly locked in your lungs as you wait. This was another critical moment. Would he grasp your hand? Rip it off? It was entirely unknown, beyond dangerous. 

But none of those things happen. The painting, god touching adam, comes to mind as he raises a clawed index finger delicately up to yours. They don’t touch but rather hover in proximity to one another before a grin works its way across his face, those sharp incisors catching against his bottom lip as his eyes flick back to your goggled face. 

You hope he can see that you’re smiling too, but you hope its not like it is with monkeys where grins are signs of aggression. But it seems that fear is unwarranted as his tail twitches erratically, the wispy bits of filigree flesh on the split end swirling through the water in a gorgeous display of deep blue and white. Like sheer fabric winding through the air. 

The ecstasy that floods your brain is a feeling like no other, a full body sensation that spreads from the tips of your fingers to your fabric covered toes. His tail moves to brush against your kicking legs, the heft of it is shocking. You can immediately imagine the sheer power of it kocking into you, it would feel like being hit by a freight train no doubt. For something that looked so elegant and otherworldly, it was still a threat. 

But you couldn’t get distracted you needed some display of his intelligence, and you needed it now. 

So you shake off the awe, do your best to refocus on his face. Carefully you draw back your hand, pointing to yourself and then at him. You repeat the gesture several times, hoping to receive a reaction that displays understanding. 

And he doesn’t keep you waiting long. 

In a flash one clawed, webbed hand encircles your wrist and halts your movement. 

It’s like time suspends, a complete and total pause as you feel a different kind of chill within the suit. It’s like you’re watching in third person, your throat seizing as your fingers intertwine hesitantly. It’s an oddly tender gesture, and then your body is tugged through the weight of the water, pushed against the solidness of his chest. Your arms came gingerly around him, and his enveloped you in turn. He was all firmness, so solidly built it shocked you. You hadn’t properly appreciated the sheer mass of him, the way his body had been crafted for underwater pursuit, hunting. But also to accommodate displays of affection, just like your own. 

And as you two embrace you can’t help but smile again. It wasn’t perfect, but it was enough to form one hell of an argument on his behalf and you would shout until your face was blue that going forward, communication would take priority. Worrying about the innerworkings of his physiology could wait until later.

[sunnys-out]

The Star and her Sun | Alessia Russo x Reader

A/N: Hello everyone! Thank you to those who checked up on me. I'm doing alright now. Still studying for the LSAT which I am set to take on the 8th of June, so send good vibes. I have been working on this one for a bit. This combines three of the prompts that I had and honestly, I'm kinda attached to this one because it is friends to lovers and my ass loves that shit like. I am working on three others that should be coming out soon. Thank you all. (REMINDER: REQUESTS ARE CLOSED)

WC: 7k

Warnings: Family sickness, alcohol, foul language, gendered language (anything else let me know)

Chime~

The little bells rang throughout the quiet, little, London cafe as it cut through the sounds of a football match playing on a laptop by the counter. 

Alessia saw someone behind the counter hunched over what looked to be like a large book and notebook filled with all sorts of highlights and post its. 

“Morning~, can I get something started for you?” A soft voice sounded from behind the fresh pastries as Alessia noticed that you gave a quick look to her and returned to whatever you were doing. 

Alessia approached the counter and peered at you still sitting down with your hair held up and with a floral headband keeping away the stray hairs that still graced your cheeks. 

You close the textbook, using the notebook like a bookmark to not lose your place, smoothing out the apron fully standing in front of Alessia.

She couldn’t help but follow the movement as you went past her eyeline. You were probably over 6’0 and you caught her moment of awe and laughed a little.

“I’m 6’3 if that is what you were wondering” you said as you further adjusted the apron around your waist.

Alessia blushed at being caught, 

“Sorry, uh- I’m new around here and this was the first cafe I saw that was close to my place and open this early so I don’t have an idea of what I want really?” her normally confident tone faltered as she fully took in your features.

A smile crept on your face as you put your hands in the front pockets of the apron and begin to rock back and forth on your heels. You look at the kit bag on Alessia’s shoulder.

“Seems like you’re going to training…Arsenal right? Well, the rest of the girls usually pop on through in the afternoon after practice but I’d always recommend the Apple Crumble pastry and a small, sweet latte with oat milk for morning trainings”

Alessia only nodded at the question, “Yeah, that sounds perfect actually…you a fan?” 

I nod as I bend down with a pair of tongs to place the pastry into a small bag. 

“My mum is a huge gooner, and my pops is a big Man United fan.” You laugh a little before continuing and beginning the process of making the latte.

“I guess I am both as well…grew up in it really, so yeah you can say I’m a fan ” You place the top on the disposable cup and slide the coffee and pastry towards Alessia stopping her before she gets her wallet out.

“First one is on me, little star” you say and are met with a stunned silence from the younger girl. 

She remained looking at you a sense of familiarity hits her as your soft but firm eyes returned the stare but she couldn’t place it for the life of her. It looked like you were waiting for a specific response from her.

“Thanks…uh I’ll see you around” she says as she quickly grabs the things on the counter and heads for the door.

You say quickly to her as Alessia grabs onto the handle of the door, “Oh tell the girls I said my hellos”

Alessia nods and runs out of the cafe and nearly trips over the sidewalk as she continues on to the training center. 

You watch her and she wanders off, Alessia completely flustered by the encounter, shaking your head you mutter as a laugh leaves your mouth 

“Still as clumsy as I remember”.

________________________________

Bearsted FC, Kent

Being the oldest kid at Bearsted FC meant a lot of the younger kids looked up to you both figuratively and physically. Being freshly ten and measuring at 5’4 was nothing to ignore. You were one of the few kids that did not need any convincing to be in goal. 

You enjoyed it. The amount of afternoons practicing blocking shots with your parents gave you a sense of pride with each ball that flew away from goal or trapped within your gloves.

You had promise of becoming one of England’s best goalkeepers or so said the many adults at your games on the weekends.

Even little Alessia Russo, who would come bounding towards you at the end of each and every game. You both had been playing for both the boys and the girls on the weekend. Again, no one else would step as keeper so no one could really say no to you.

“That was amazing,(y/n)!!!” Alessia jumped towards you with her arms then extended to mimic a save you had done that game.

You shook your head and smoothed out your uniform as you looked down at you teammate. 

“Me? Nah, you were amazing, I mean you have been really practicing your shooting. Got a brace today!” you say patting her shoulder.

“What’d ya mean? It would’ve been perfect if I didn’t slip on the grass” Alessia initially beaming up at you and then frowning as she showed off the grass stains on her shorts. 

You shake your  head, “I mean it Lessie, I mean you got the grown ups saying that you’re England’s next big striker and I agree with them” You continue to pick up your stuff from the side of the goal. 

Alessia only remained silent before firmly saying, “Well only if you’re there, I don’t trust anyone else, you are such a good goal keeper!”

You roll your eyes at the younger girl yes, “you’ll get there with or without me Lessie, trust me” You look over and see your  parents waving you over.

“Well I'm going to head home, see ya tomorrow eh little star?” Who only nods acknowledging the pats to her shoulder as you run over to your parents.

You were enjoying the last few weekends that you had in England. Your parents had already mentioned to you that your father had found a much better job in Florida that required a move to the States.

You were already 10 years old so your time at the league was ending anyways, the only worry you had was finding a new team to play for. Your parents reassured you that there were clubs in Miami that would take you and it’d be a nice change in scenery.

Your last weekend came up and it was going to be a surprise to everyone but unbeknownst  to you, Alessia had fallen ill. Her parent’s not telling her that it was your last time playing there, the last time that you would play in England to save her from feeling worse apart from her illness.

You played well and ended your little “career” with another clean sheet but this time without Alessia Russo coming over to your goal to sing you your praises. She was your best friend and it left you dejected as you grabbed your things from the grass and headed over to your parents. 

“Darling, don’t look down, your father gave the Russos our number so she will call you when she feels better and we are in the states” Your mother sensing the disappointment that clearly permeated from your demeanor. 

That did make you feel a wee bit better that at least Alessia had some way to get in touch with you. What you didn’t know is that, unfortunately for you, Alessia’s father forgot the piece of paper in his jeans and the number was lost in the wash. He didn’t have the heart to tell Alessia of what happened.

Waiting by the home phone proved to be a rather frequent activity until your mother said “It’s ok we are going to visit sooner or later”.  

However, soon became a couple years and not to your surprise Alessia and her family had moved.

She moved somewhere different, so you had to move on from your best friend you so deeply missed.

________________________________

Upon Alessia’s arrival to the training grounds, the other girls immediately clocked the familiar coffee cup design.

“Oh looks like you’ve already met our favorite barista, Russo” Katie wraps an arm around Alessia’s shoulders.

The blonde’s cheeks grew red at the mention of you. “Uh yeah, she mentioned y’all… said hello”

Katie’s eyes twinkled, “Oh how I love that girl…you got a good look at her didn’t you?” 

Before Alessia could continue to show that she was a nervous mess; Leah intervened.

 “Leave the poor girl alone, Katie. We all know of your little crush on (Y/N), get in line like the rest of us”. 

The rest of the locker room erupted in laughter and in mutual agreement. 

Alessia returned to her area and placing her things in her cubby still reeling from the whole interaction. 

After a particularly exhausting practice, she turned down going with the other girls to the cafe you worked at. She lied saying that she still had some unpacking to finish and why should she go back if she’d already been there in the morning? 

“Don’t need to buy anything, Lessi, just seeing (y/n) is worth the walk down” Katie laughed giving her a quick bump to the shoulder.

An awkward laugh from Alessia escaped her as she shooed away her teammates but not before promising that she would join them the next time….which was a lie because she would avoid the cafe as much as she could to avoid the nervousness that she felt. The way that your gaze affected her…how even in the early morning your eyes were bright, soft, and firm.

________________________________

After two weeks of, reluctantly, going to any cafe other than the one that you worked at Alessia finally found herself being dragged by Toone towards your cafe.

“Tooney, there are other places with pastries, do we really have to go to this one?” Alessia pleaded to her friend who looked at her confused and pulled Alessia even further.

“Nah, Phallon is there and she said that her old university friend working there will hook us up with some free pastries, you were excited about the free pastries part, what’s got you not wanting to go now huh?” 

Alessia couldn’t think of a good reason, her demeanor did change from excitement to nerves at the realization they were headed towards your cafe…

“I don’t think their pastries are all that” she lied to which earned an eye roll from Ella.

“Don’t care…a free pastry is a free pastry.” Ella said, opening the door of the cafe to see an occupied Phallon leaning on the counter as she scrolled her phone looking for something.

She lifted her head, “Oh hey Tooney, hey Alessia, guess you got her with the free pastries huh?” she said with a smile.

Alessia let out a quiet sigh of relief as she saw someone that wasn’t you walk into the back carrying a box.

“Where’s your friend, Phallon?” Ella went to the counter towards her teammate.

Phallon continued scrolling through her phone and stopped seemingly finding what she was looking for. 

“Oh she had to go get some boxes really quick but she’ll be back. I was going to show her the highlight I had seen of her from two weekends ago, just found it. She’ll kill me but…” She laughs turning the phone screen towards Ella and Alessia as the video began to play.

Toone did not see Alessia’s eyes widen at the realization that you were the one playing; that you were the one in goal. 

Alessia recognized the team as one of the local club teams nearby, a part of the lower leagues. One of the main points of the video that played again slowly was a save that was thoroughly impressive. There was something in the way that you made the save that triggered a memory in Alessia. 

Before Alessia could say anything in response to the video, your voice interrupted her thoughts.

“Been a while, Russo…TJ can you not show my highlights, it’s embarrassing” You say, with a laugh, passing closely to Alessia and hip checking Phallon as you place the two boxes of napkins on the counter. 

Phallon only lets out a laugh, “hey it was a good save (y/n), if you weren’t on this med school route, you’d easily be recruited by a WSL club team…”

Ella immediately agrees and pushes more, “Phallon is right, if you were on another team, you’d be an absolute nightmare for us right, Lessie?”. You look back at Alessia, who at the mention of her name finally blinked.

“Uh yeah, that was a good save. I don’t think I would get anything past you” she says quietly under your firm gaze as she hears your name for the first time. 

You only nod turning away from the group to put away the boxes, “Yeah maybe, well that was the dream but things sometimes don’t go that way you know but hey you can have multiple dreams…aka the med school route Phallon so happened to mention”

Alessia’s eyes followed you as you continued on answering Ella’s array of questions as you put away the supplies needed behind the counter.

Drying your hands you go to pack some pastries for the group, 

“Yeah I was a walk on for our university team and I ended up playing for them for a while, even started more than half the games…decided to just come back home after I didn’t get drafted into the NWSL”. 

The last part came out with some hesitation, you turn back with three small baggies filled with pastries.

Phallon takes them in her hands and says “See you at the game, yeah?” 

You nod, “Course, just remember to send me the tickets this time TJ, now head on off, I know that you all have practice later”.

As the group was about to leave, Alessia stops when you firmly say, “Actually, before I forget…Alessia, you forgot something the last time you were here”

Alessia looked to Ella who, didn’t help at all, said “Oh, we have to head out, I’ll text ya later Less”, leaving Alessia to her own devices 

As Alessia, hesitantly, reached the counter, you pulled up your chair and sat with your elbows on the counter and your head resting at your palms.

“Sooooo…you going to tell me why you’ve been avoiding me or do you want me to guess?” You say already with an answer in mind.

The younger girl messed with her hands and refused to meet your eyes “ ‘m not avoiding you…there’s just other cafes…” 

You clicked your tongue, “sure…anything else because I don’t believe you, little star” the nickname caused for Alessia’s cheeks to turn red…

“Uhhh…well I don’t think Katie would like me hanging around her crush, ‘ppose you like her too…I mean why wouldn’t you…I mean not saying I don’t want to see you but not that I have a crush on you or anything…but you’re pretty but I don’t think…”her thoughts were interrupted by your stifled laughter.

You rubbed your eyes to wipe the tears the came from holding it in.

“Hold on…firstly, I like Katie but not in that way. Second, is that really why you’ve been avoiding me, Lessie?…I thought it was something else, this however, I’m not complaining about” 

You said gesturing over to Alessia’s flustered demeanor.

The look of confusion on her face only added to your laughter, “Lessie, I know you’re not dumb…come on, who else in your life has ever called you, Little Star…I mean your folks started calling you star girl because of it and now the media does but who was the first to call you their little star?” 

You smiled towards her as you took in her slow realization, her eyes widening as she began finally taking in your features. The way that your eyes looked at her was enough proof to her, you were her.

Alessia quickly pulls you into a hug from across the counter, “you asshole, you could’ve just told me. God, it’s been so long”. Her grip on you is so tight that you would think that you were about to fly away if she let go. You feel her bury her face in your hair as you lean into her more.

Another laugh leaves your mouth, “well I thought you would have figured it out but now I know why you avoided me”. She pulls away immediately and sees the smirk that now adorned your face.

“ Someone’s got a little crush on me” you tease as you get up from your chair only to be followed, in tandem, on the other side of the cafe counter by the striker.

“I never said that!” her voice not, convincingly, confident like the day she first saw you again after many years.

You ignore her and only respond with a hum as you adjust your apron and round the corner of the counter and walk briskly towards the younger girl.

“Is that so? Shame because I also had a crush on you but I guess we will never know, of what may have happened if you also had a crush on me” You continue your teasing as you begin to shoo her out of the cafe with a gentle push.

The striker pushes back against you and grabs your right hand as you grab the handle to “kick her out”.

“Hey wait, wait…I was just joking…come on, Sole” You don’t take your hand off the handle but you froze at your old nickname, Sole. 

You hadn’t heard that name in decades at that point…her parents called you “her sole”...”her sun” because she was always pulled to you. The moment she got out of the car at practice she would run to you at goal, the moment the game would end she’d run to you, and eventually Alessia would copy her parents and call you ‘Sole’ in response to your calling of ‘little star’ to her.

You felt Alessia push back against you and you budged a bit. As you opened the door, you used the momentum in one of her efforts and turned her towards you as you lowered your face to hers.

“I’m joking, little star. Get to practice. I’ll see you this weekend, I’ll find you after the game, Phallon will get me…I’ve missed you by the way”. You say calmly, patted her shoulder and then,gently, pushed her out of the cafe and closed the door behind her. 

          ________________________________

Match day against Manchester United came quickly to the Emirates and Alessia was nervous for multiple reasons. She was facing her old club for the first time and playing before her old friend that she definitely had a crush on. 

You never gave her your number and she didn’t want to ask Ella to then have to ask Phallon because then Ella would start wondering why and she couldn’t hide her feelings for you from her best friend. If Tooney found out, oh she would never hear the end of it. 

The team all rallied and began warm ups, the noises of the stadium gradually grew as people filed in. 

Alessia’s eyes would scan the suites where player’s families and friends from either team would be situated…she didn’t see you. 

She’d discreetly do it again during the as the team got into their positions…nothing. Unbeknownst to her, you had an eye on her the whole time; laughing at the way she “discreetly” scanned the family suites looking for you.

You never enjoyed the suites and always preferred watching from a fan’s point of view. You weren’t known so it wasn’t a worry that you’d be found out by fans. You settled into your seat your legs already used to the lack of space. You were surrounded by other fans with your mother’s old Arsenal jacket she got when she was your age with a little bit of a red jersey peeking underneath. 

It was an Alessia Russo jersey from when she played for Manchester United. You got it the moment that you heard that she signed on. Your father being elated that your childhood friend was playing for his team, 

“as she should!” you remember how proud he sounded when you shared the news

Lessie was loved by your family so you purchasing her jersey wasn’t seen as weird or off. You were as enamored with Alessia as she was of you in that moment. As a kid, you had always dreamed that one day you and Alessia would exchange jerseys after a game against each other, the thought caused for a short-lived frown to grace your face. 

You took a photo of Phallon in goal from where you were seated and posted it to your story tagging her and adorning the photo with University of Miami stickers and a caption that said “That’s my best friend!”

You loved your university friend dearly but you hoped that your little star would get one past her. As the game began, you watched Alessia, silently, like you did all those years ago from your goal posts. Placing you feet on the seat in front of you and putting your elbows to your knees and watched in awe. 

Your little star was not so little anymore but she played with the same energy and joy as she did when you were both younger. You couldn’t help but jump up in excitement when she scored. Except this time you couldn’t hit the posts with your gloves from the other side of the field like you traditionally did. 

During halftime, you got a text from Phallon telling you to head down to tunnel before the end of the game. She had already let it be known to security that you would be coming by and to just flash the badge she had given you.

The game had ended with a 2-0 scoreline in favor of Arsenal, earning Alessia a brace against her former club. Phallon came in and upon seeing you, enveloped you in a tight hug. The hug itself started to push off the University of Miami baseball hat you had on from your head.

“Hey you did great out there, was like old times” you said with a laugh as you patted Phallon’s back.

Phallon was a tad upset but nodded at your words, “Could’ve been better but hey this ain’t the NWSL, so I’m happy to have played anyways”. You had stayed in the United States for a year after failing to get drafted and would often fly out to Seattle to watch Phallon at her home games. You wanted to support her for as long as you could; that still wouldn’t be enough to pay her back for all that she had done for you. 

You hadn’t noticed that Alessia had walked into the tunnel with Toone and seen the slight look of jealousy she shot Phallon.

“That’s her best friend is all…goal keeper union and all that. Mary probably knows her too…” as if on queue Mary came by and enveloped you in a hug from behind which earned a laugh from you. Mary’s powerful stature now seemed small in comparison when you towered over her. 

Alessia did not realize that Ella had pulled her towards you and the other girls until she heard you say,

“Oh hey you two, you both had an incredible game, especially you…Russo!” The smile that you had now directed at her, filled with knowing that you had such an affect of her as you noticed that Alessia’s cheeks became the same color as her jersey.

The other girls agreed amongst themselves. “How about a little get together later tonight? Just a couple drinks nothing too crazy, (Y/N), you are always invited” Mary ended the proposal with a pat on your shoulder.

You nod, “Oh Alessia, heard you’d need a ride home, I can take you, since I have to stop at the cafe really quick before I go home anyways”. The offer bringing Alessia out of the trance that she was in. 

“Sure…if it isn’t any issue” she said softly that earned a quick assurance from you.

“Nah don’t worry about it…I’m parked where the players are, so I’ll just text you where I’m at” you say handing her your phone so that she can put in her number.

Once Alessia handed your phone  back, you said your goodbyes and whispered a quick, “I’ll see you soon, little star” to her before heading down the hall. Alessia nodded and turned to see a smirking Toone.

“You can thank me by the way…I could've given you a ride but I am always looking out for my bestie so I made myself ~ unavailable ~ and I expect you to put on your cutest outfit, Less!” she sang the last part as she put her arm around Alessia’s shoulder. 

“I-I don’t-what?”, the blonde quietly whispers to Toone.

Ella rolls her eyes, “Less, I know when you have a crush, you’re the worst at hiding it. Plus she’s a catch and I’m sure she likes you too, so just here to give ya a little push like the good friend I am” her eyelashes flutter towards the blonde. 

The forward did not even try to fight her friend and instead went to the locker room with the rest of her team. After going through the various congrats and photos for Player of the Match, she finally unlocked her phone to a message from an unknown number, you.

“Hey little star, I'm parked in section A spot 29. I’ll be sat in my car so no rush do what ya gotta do 😊”

Alessia smiled down at the message, the nickname flustering her even in just text form. 

“I’ll see you soon, just finishing up here 😊” her message was met with a small, heart like.

You were scrolling on your Instagram, as a random Spotify playlist played from your phone. Your head leaned on the window of your car as you continued completely unaware of your own surroundings. A gentle tap on the passenger window across from you made a big smile appear as you unlocked the car to a still-nervous Alessia. 

“You could put your stuff in the back don’t worry, it's unlocked”. Once Alessia put her things away in the back seat she found herself in the passenger seat, struggling to put on her own seat belt. 

“I’m not going even to ask if you need help,”  you said with a small laugh as you leaned over, grabbed the seat belt, and quickly put it into the buckle.

As you lean back into your chair, you stopped closely to Alessia’s face, 

“That buckle gets everyone, don’t be embarrassed…you don’t need to be nervous around me either but seems like I do that to everyone” you smile slyly as no response comes from her and start the car and you begin to pull out of the lot.

Alessia breaks her own silence, 

“(y/n)...my dad lost your number in the wash…that’s why I never called you. I hope you don’t think that I left you, I really did miss you” You waved your hand towards her. 

“I know that you never meant for that to happen…I didn’t expect to leave so young” 

She only nodded and continued,

“Soooo, what did you end up doing and what’s this about med school?” 

A sigh escapes you, “uh we moved to Miami because dad got a really good job there. Things were great, I was playing club in a nice area and yeah…that lasted two years…then dad loses that job within 2 years because of the recession…we had savings but we had to cut out a lot of things…football was one of them”.

You coughed as you recalled the rest, “The daughter of the coach was so happy I was gone which meant that she could be the starting goal keeper…other girls were funded by other parents who had better means…uh not me”. 

You did not even want to look at Alessia knowing she had a frown on her face. You pinch your nose as you continue.

“When I went to high school, I tried out for the team and I was good according to the coach…but then they asked me if I played club…told them I did but then stopped because I couldn’t afford it. I was cut from the team the next day…money talks there, so I uhhhh didn’t play until I went to U of M” 

“Phallon was actually my roommate…we joked that they intentionally put  the two tallest girls together in the smallest dorm at the university. It was a total coincidence that they put me with her. First day I knew she was a soccer player, she didn’t find out I was a goalkeeper until she came to me worried because her alternate did her ACL and that they needed to try out new people in the next two weeks. I denied at first said I couldn’t afford it and explained why. Phallon talked to her family and next thing I knew…everything was paid for I just needed to try out…rest is history. You already know that I didn’t get drafted and well I came back. Been staying at my aunt’s place, rent free. She’s retired so she’s always away on travel”. 

Alessia nodded, still noticing how you rushed to the end. 

“How are your parents-?” she stops the moment she sees your hands tense at the wheel.

You shift in your seat, “Sorry, my parent’s are fine now, they are still in Florida actually…they are kind of stuck there…Mum got sick recently and dad followed suit…took them forever to convince me to move back, but they are ok it’s just we are in a weird spot. Everything is ok but not at the same time, don’t know if that makes sense”. You glance at her with a soft smile.

Alessia puts a hand to your shoulder, “hey sorry if that’s a sore spot and no it makes sense, it’s been a while since I’ve seen them obviously” She lets out a laugh. 

“Dad was so happy when you signed to United you know? And now, mum has been over the moon since you joined Arsenal” the tone in your voice now lighter. 

As you and Alessia talked it felt as if you had returned to the rhythm that you both had when you were kids. She would scrunch her nose when you teased her and you’d roll your eyes when she made a bad joke. You parked near the cafe after Alessia convinced you to leave her at the cafe and she’d walk the rest home.

You began walking towards the cafe to go pick up some textbooks you had left earlier that morning, beginning to take off your jacket out of habit as you got to the door. Alessia, who had stopped to see you off only saw the deep red of the Manchester jersey you wore, the white letters spelling out ‘Russo’  disappearing into the cafe.

________________________________

Alessia had practically inhaled the first drink that was handed to her by Toone due to the nerves that she had. Toone looked proud when Alessia arrived with her hair down, gold hoops and necklace with a black crop top and light washed jeans. 

“You look absolutely stunning, if she doesn’t want to take you home immediately seeing you then something is wrong with her” Toone said that earned a slap on the shoulder from Alessia,

“Shut it, don’t need to be so loud about it”. They both decide to get another drink while they waited for you to enter the bar. There respective teammates floating around the bar, laughs and conversations were heard from every corner. 

“(y/n)!!!! Leah told me you were coming!”  Katie’s thick accent now even thicker due to drinks she had already had.

Alessia had already started to feel the buzz of the 2 drinks she had went through minutes ago so the exclamation from Katie felt louder than usual. She turned and saw you talking to Katie who already began to wrap her arm around your waist pulling you closer to her. You entertained her and just held her briefly and it now looked like Katie was a koala on tree. 

Leah finally released you from Katie’s grasp only earning a laugh from you as you patted Katie’s shoulders to save her from the embarrassment what occurred. Alessia felt the tug at her heart when she saw your smile and heard your laugh. Even with all of the noise and movement, it seemed like you were moving slowly and clearly only for her to see. 

Alessia only snapped out of it when she felt a jab into her ribs, 

“You’re drooling, Lessie, I’d wipe your mouth because she’s headed this way, I’m going for another drink see ya”. The forward did not even have time to register what was said by Toone and even worse when you appeared in front of her.

“You ok? You’ll catch flies” You say semi-teasingly, semi-serious, lightly, tapping the underside of her chin as Alessia hadn’t closed her mouth since you had entered the bar. She finally was able to take you in and her silence to what you said only caused you to laugh.

Alessia saw you adjust the rolled up sleeves of your jacket and her eyes drifted to the exposed section of your stomach, then up at the subtle gold chain that you had on, you caught her gaze finally reached your face.

“So, I’m just going to get my one drink of the night, want to join me?…seems you need a refill” You take the empty glass from her hand as you started for the bar with Alessia following right behind you.

“Sorry, for being all quiet, I’m just tired you know” the blush on the striker’s cheeks told another story. 

You nod as you order yourself two drinks and slide one over to Alessia.

“Sure, little star, and I’m the president of the United States” you tease as you felt a tiny push of the shoulder from her. 

The conversation was like any other and the alcohol finally hit Alessia not at once, if you asked her, but when she was pulling you towards the dance floor with all the other Arsenal girls who were equally slightly, stumbling. 

She looked up at you as she brought you closer by your waist and laid her head on a part of your shoulder almost using you to stabilize herself. Alessia took in how warm you were and the woody, almost pine scent from your clothes; she couldn’t help but close her eyes and quietly sigh contently.

She barely registered your hand gently rubbing her back as you both were “slow dancing” in the middle of the bar. Which just meant you were both swaying slowly side to side, well you were more stabilizing Alessia as you moved side to side.

Her eyes opened as she felt the rumble in your chest as you spoke, “Nah she’s ok,...yeah Katie she’s an old friend actually…more now and we’re just catching up on lost time…ok I’ll see you”.

You, gently, tap Alessia’s waist to get her attention and lower yourself to her ear,  “You alright?” 

Alessia hummed and only melted herself more into you as your chest rumbled again but from laughter.

“You want to head out? Don’t want you to fall asleep standing…well you might actually trip over yourself if I let you go.” Alessia doesn’t answer but nods into your chest.

You push her a little so that you can lead her out of the bar waving at the rest of the team to get home safe.

Alessia stops you, “Can you carry me home?” she says quietly as she tries to stabilize herself without your aid but fails only to grab you by the arm. 

Without a word, you get in front of her and squat a little. 

“Come on, just get on my back, I can take you to mine, it’s actually just a block and a half away” 

Alessia, carefully, gets on your back and wrapping her arms around you neck as you hold her legs. 

The lights of the streets are almost blurry as Alessia laid her head on your back.

“I really did miss you, Sole”, you hear Alessia slur out from behind you.

You stop a bit before going up to the door of you aunt’s home, “me too, little star”.

________________________________

You assist Alessia into some of your clean clothes, obviously fitting way too big on her, combed through her hair, removed her make up, brushed her teeth, and finally lead her to your bed.

“I’ll sleep on the couch downstairs -” you began to say before Alessia, even though she was completely out of it, pulled you down to the bed next to her.

“Don’t be stupid, come on, you didn’t think I saw you with my jersey earlier” she muttered as she made her place in your arms and began to sleep. You only smiled as your fingers went through her hair and then rested at her hip as she feel asleep… you silently wishing that this would be your everyday but when have you ever been this lucky?

________________________________

Over the several weeks, Alessia would come only in the mornings opting to be selfish with the time that she spent with you. She would lean on the counter and talk to you as you were sat in the chair reading over your text book like the day she met you, sometimes even having your parents on the phone to speak with her. She thought, at the beginning, that you weren’t listening to her but you would occasionally insert little quips or observations.

“Ok sorry to say but that video of you in Australia, that Mary shared, was actually really funny”. You said as you highlighted another part of your textbook before setting it down on the table. 

Alessia rolled her eyes, “ok I swear it was going to charge at me, anyways, I’m off to practice…see you tomorrow?”. 

You nod as you lean down and give her a quick kiss on the lips as she practically skipped out of the cafe. 

You look underneath the counter at the opened letter that you had received a week ago. It said of your new schedule that your clinicals would now be mornings and you’d be assigned to a location to travel outside of the city in the afternoons.

“I’ll tell her tomorrow” was the phrase you would say over and over again. Your resolve in actually telling her would melt away the moment Alessia waltzed in every morning with her smile that made you buckle.

Tomorrow would be the last possible day to tell her so you had to tell her, of course, you could only blame your own unwillingness to break her heart. You weren’t breaking up with her just telling her 

‘Hey, remember how we didn’t see each other for a really long time and we found each other and now things are great, well I have to go again but I will still remember you…hope you wait for me like I waited for you…’

The next morning came and you had settled into your seat behind the counter like you always did and waited for your Little Star to walk in with her smile that was so bright it’d make the moon jealous. You hid the sunflowers that you had got her under some newspaper, hoping, it’d lessen the blow of what you were about to say to her. 

The minutes passed and the ding from your phone disturbed the comfortable silence.

“Hey Sole, I’m not feeling too well today, think I ate something bad last night so I’m not coming in and just going to go back to bed,  don’t miss me too much” followed with “ Little Star has notifications silenced”

You sighed with a frown, as you began to speak into your phone:

“You’re going to hate me. I’m sorry-”

Alessia’s heart dropped as she began listening to the voicemessages in her bathroom after sleeping for another 3 hours.

“I’m going to be no longer working at the cafe because I’m going be fully dedicating myself to my studies. Clinicals at the hospital are picking up and I will be going out of town often to work…I won’t be able to see you nor really talk to you. You are important to me and I am stupid for not telling you sooner…makes it seem like this is more important than you but it isn’t… I just didn’t want to break your heart. 

I love you, my little star, since the night at the bar. When you held onto me for dear life as we “danced”. When I brought you home when you were drunk off your ass and could barely stand. I still smell the traces of your scent on my bed sheets; my clothes; my pillowcase no matter how many times I have washed everything…the way you pulled me to bed to just hold you as you slept. I still remember the feel of you under my palms; every curve, every line as I passed my hands lightly on your hip as you quietly snored. I wished for that for so long with someone and I’m glad it was with my best friend.

I want to let you go because you deserve my full attention…I hope that you wait for me like I waited for you, but if not then I hope that I can still cheer you on from across the field as you continue making a name for yourself. 

I love you my little star and always will.

Come by the cafe later, if you’re able, to pick up what I intended to give you…as a goodbye…sorry I won’t be here I’m actually leaving soon once my coworker clocks in…it’s the first day I need to be out of town…I love you”

Alessia finally arrived at the busy cafe; which was an odd sight for her. The cashier, immediately upon seeing Alessia, motioned her over, allowing her to cut in front of the line. 

“Sorry folks, just got to make a quick delivery” the assumed university student apologized to the line before going back and quickly emerged with a small bouquet of sunflowers wrapped in newspaper with an envelope sitting amongst them.

Alessia took them with a sad smile and headed over to an open table in the corner. She pulled out the envelope seeing it was covered in stamps and re sealed several times. 

Carefully opening it she sees a neatly folded napkin, in front of a thicker paper, the napkin itself had written.

“Mum sent me this right after I told her that we found each other again. This was the last time we were together…think you got a hat trick this game.”

The napkin was set aside as Alessia took out the thicker paper turning it over to see it was a photo of the two of you as children.

Alessia’s then dark hair held up in low pigtails with a big smile as you held her up in a hug also a big smile adorning your face. 

Her sad smile was short lived as she looked at what you had written in the white part of the photo,

“The Star and her Sun” 

It was then Alessia decided to wait for you because what is a Star without her Sun. 

[helladirections]

July Fic List

After May and June I put out lists of all the fics I read and reblogged, and I got good feedback so #WritersSupportingWriters because reblogging and rec-ing are the only way that writers get readers.

FYI:

In order I reblogged not order written

Not necessarily written in July

I only reblog after I read and like it

90% of the fics I read are because they came across my dash

Must have a Read More bc I'm not making people scroll like that

I'm begging y'all to put word counts on your fics pls

Previous Monthly Lists | Fic Rec Tag | My Masterlist

Spreading You Open (4 parts) Part 1 7.5k Part 2 7.1k Part 3 7.1k Part 4 also exists but I haven't finished it yet An Unexpected Goal 9.9k Spinning Out, Waiting For Ya 3.8k @swiftmendeshoran

Drunk With You 6.3k @finelinenina

Call It What You Want Part 1 8k Part 2 6.2k Part 3 6.1k @narrycherries

Protection (10 Parts) Toothpaste Part 1 1.6k Part 2 2.1k Part 3 2.6k @1d1195

A Night Out With Harry 1.1k Too Long 1.5k Touch 3.8k Seven Six Five (series) Part One 3.9k Part Two 3.6k Part Three 3.5k Part Four 3.1k Part Five 4.9k Part Six 6.4k @lemoncrushh

Tastes Like... 8.7k One of the few fics I've reread. So good. @tobesobri

Somebody Else Part 1 2.7k Part 2 4.6k Part 3 3.8k Part 4 6k Part 5 11.1k Part 6 7.1k Part 7 5.6k Part 8 9.1k @harrystylescherry

The Favor Master List (series) The Favor: Part 9 10.2k I'm simply enjoying the view (pornstarry filming with y/n) @jarofstyles

Protect You 3k @harryhitties

YN had a bad day, and coming home to Harry is the one thing... 1.6k @heartateasee

You Again 11.4k @freedomfireflies

Use Me Up| Boyfriend's Best Friend!H 7k Next Door Neighbors 7.8k @gurugirl

Please, Please, Please: Part 1 5.6k Part 2 5k @purplecoffee13

No Coincidence 6.5k A Chance 3-4k @0nlythrowharrybeaux

Sweet Creature (Restaurant Owner H / Chef YN) 1: Prepping 4.3k 2: The Offer 5k 3: Protectively Watchful 4.8k 4: Heat of the Kitchen 5k 5: Seasoned to Perfection 6k @justletmeadoreyou

A/O/B Academic Rivals Part 1 22k Part 2 20k Part 3 18k @jawllines

The Devil is a Gentleman Part 12 8.7k (IF you haven't been reading this you must be living under a rock) @1800titz

Something In The Orange 2k @finelinevogue

Sunshine (Part 1) @stylesloveclub

Even If It Takes Forever 9k @watchmegetobsessed

[mrsackermannx]

trust me with it | choso kamo

choso has experienced so much of what it is to be human already, but you're slowly making him realise that he's far more human than he thought.

word count: 7k

tagging: (ya’ll interacted with my interact to be tagged post back in November🥺) @meownotgood @sixpennydame @tomuraslut @romantichomicide95 @cathybarn @c-h-e-r-r-i-e-s @whatthefucksatan @loveackermannn + @p00pdev1l (have to tag you my beloved <3)

tags: 18+ canonverse choso kamo x fem!sorcerer reader, minor manga spoilers, (nothing plot wise is mentioned other than yuuji and megumi reuniting/implied culling games arc/ post shibuya incident arc), loss of virginity (virgin choso) but still soft dom choso, corruption kink too I guess?? choso has a big dick, breeding kink, size kink, slight praise kink, belly bulge, unprotected sex, use of "human/little human," light love confession/confession of feelings-so sex with feelings? low-key self indulgent, not beta read, vvv intense sex, possessive/smitten choso (slightly yandere at the end??)

author’s note 💌: (nov 23): hope this isn’t a little too ooc, ive been dying to write something for choso and this came to me so i had to write it! virgin characters are my faves to write🤭(june 24): I HAVE HAD THIS SAT IN MY DRAFTS SINCE NOVEMBER AND WANTED TO SET IT FREE😭😭😭

Choso had been plunged into a world of the unknown from the moment he met you. Before you, he liked to believe that one hundred and fifty years of existence meant that his wisdom would always be the indispensable weapon against which he truly feared—the unknown, and the humanity of his heart.

He was hardly a stranger to continuous, repetitive loops of thought but it felt as if his brain had rewired itself. Not even his inner world was safe from the insatiable need to be near you, his own thoughts searched for you when they dared stray elsewhere. 

He thumped the tile before him, hot water scalding his back as he willed his hopeless blood to answer him. It was acting on its accord all the time, his heart nothing but frenzied beating in his chest, not even his body in his own control anymore.

The need to be near you, to feel you and touch you in ways he couldn’t even explain was going to be his undoing tonight. Sharing a room with you seemed to send equal prickles of fear and excitement through him.

You reached out for your reflection in the glass as if you’d throttle it but chose to reach out and trail patterns against the window instead. You wrote nonsense for a few moments, before cursed energy started to zap through your fingertips in minute electric pulses. A shower normally reset you after a day like this, but you supposed this was a rather special circumstance. 

You were glad to be alive even though you didn’t feel you deserved it and the weight of your fellow sorcerers still slugged down your shoulders. The responsibility for your students was an ever present taste in your mouth. You eyed your tattered uniform beside you, all too grateful for the hotel robe Choso had insisted you wear after he picked apart the suitcase left by the last guests. It was soft and fluffy, perfect for how light your body felt after your shower and admittedly around Choso.

You gripped your stomach, the guilt demanding to be free. Your head was still fuzzy from how hot you’d had your shower, as you’d yearned to wash away all that had happened. But that would be a dream, “Satoru, I’m sorry I wasn’t there,” you whispered, laying your forehead against the cool glass.

Thankfully the wailing vibrations of a nearby car alarm rattled through the glass and then your ears, dragging you from the dark edges of your mind. 

You peered down below at the scene, squinting to figure out the cause of the chaos. Cackles of maniacal laughter followed sounds of crumbling concrete as your eyes darted from fire to fire. When one was extinguished another rose up in its place. Yet the neon lights of Tokyo still shone, a loyal audience and an ever present reminder of what life used to be like. 

It was pure anarchy, like waking up from one nightmare and going right back into another. Yet the world was not ending and then starting again it just kept ending instead. 

You weren’t sure what was worse, the hell out there, or the one in this room? Choso wasn’t quite sure either, he thought as much as he watched you intently from the doorway of the bathroom. He found he could often do so and never tire of it because there was a fluidity to your movements that calmed him, something that reminded him of water, like warm waves somewhere safe. 

He liked that about you, he liked a lot about you. 

You glanced at his reflection in the glass, and resisted smiling at how he watched you so attentively. Concern knitted his features into something soft and more approachable than the expression he usually showed everyone else.

He was so cute and serious all at once that it was infuriating. He towered over you in height and his hands dwarfed yours, every feature of his face was dark and perfect, and maddeningly symmetrical like he was crafted in heaven, like some kind of dark, beautiful, fallen angel. 

But nothing about Choso was what you expected, that you learned early. He might have looked intimidating, but he was careful and patient, he stopped to admire flowers when he thought nobody was watching, he didn’t always say a lot, nor did he smile often, but he had an array of expressions that always managed to move you in some way.

You sighed. You resented how he’d managed to send the usually calm waves of your heart into a frenzy, a full blown tsunami. 

But you couldn’t hate him, it was impossible. Not when every interaction you had together, you treasured so sincerely. You casted your mind back to just nights ago, when you were sitting together on a roof in some district, sharing konbini raided food together under the stars. He held his onigiri out to cheers with yours, a phantom smile on his lips before he took a bite. 

Or when your hand brushed his as you were walking back and he frowned at how cold it was, clasping it immediately on instinct with his large, warm hand. You tried to shake his grip but he shook his head and clasped it tighter, urging you to keep up with his pace. You didn’t argue it any further.

Then just this morning after passing through what used to be a department store. You all but yelped when you felt something hook around your throat from behind. But a hand landing atop of your head quickly stopped your thrashing, “It’s just me.” You heard the glimmer of his smile, turning with one of your own.  

He was still smiling, simply as if he was so fond of you that words were futile to express the depth. Your throat went dry as he adjusted the scarf on you, “I found this,” he murmured, before continuing ahead, turning to beckon you when you stood there frozen. 

This person often acted without words and out of pure kindness and it baffled you. You knew what he had done and what he was capable of, but every wordless gesture, reassuring nod, and the warm brush of his fingertips against yours had you rethinking everything about love. 

His deep voice settled through your body and calmed your rising nerves. He’d only said your name but it sounded like the unmistakable call to come home, it made you feel like a child again.

You were still standing at the window, then, he thought, no doubt thinking of other sorcerers, of Satoru, at least you knew Yuuji and Megumi were safe, only a few doors down.

“You should sleep,” he murmured, soft footsteps growing close until his body heat somehow billowed against your nape.

It was easier to face yourself than him right now, so you dared not meet your faces in the reflection staring back at you. “What are you thinking about?”

You wanted to speak but found yourself trembling, silent tears rushed to embrace your palms, staggering where you stood you tried to cover your eyes, but Choso was already there. You felt his strong arms lock around you, stilling the tremors that shook you. You stiffened at first before you melted, the hard pieces of you pooling to his feet like wax. 

“What are you doing, Choso?”

“I felt like it was right,” he whispered, resting his chin upon your head. Instinctively his hands cupped your cheeks, swiping away the warm tears rolling there. “You stopped shaking.”

You couldn’t breathe now for entirely different reasons, being handled so tenderly seemed to make you even more tearful. 

The commotion of the fighting in the distance seemed to unsettle you more, making Choso exhale suddenly through his nose. “I…wish you didn’t have to see that.”

Your lips parted, “I don’t want to think about anything anymore Choso,” you croaked. “I don’t want to think about anything.”

“Can you think about me?” he bashfully asked, stroking his hands through your hair. “I just want to help you.”

“I don’t want to burden you, just go to bed, okay?”

He stiffened against you, unhanding you to head over to bed.

“You don’t have to fight how you feel around me. I’m not one of your students.”

“I know.” You refused to let yourself crumble anymore around him, it was too dangerous, for so many reasons.

“We have to rest so we can fight,” he murmured. You turned to find him gesturing again to the space beside him. You sighed and he countered you with an even louder one. He crossed his arms as you smirked at the sound, “Don’t be stubborn. You need to sleep.” 

His bluntness was something he did to lessen the burden of talking at times, but when he spoke to you it felt as if he did it to protect your heart. It was obvious he didn’t always know how he should say things before others, but with you it came easy. 

You let out a bitter laugh, wrapping your arms around your cold body. “You know, Choso? The more time passes, I can see that you’re an older sibling.”

He decided to take that as a compliment, humming in gratitude before continuing to pat the empty space beside him. “Then listen, come here and sleep. You can’t sleep over there.”

He cocked his brow at you, “Can you?” 

“Listen, I don’t care what Yuuji says, alright? I don't trust you.”

You immediately covered your mouth as if to take the projectiled words back. You turned back quick enough to see the frown on his face before it was gone before he impassively said, “At least trust him.”

Your eyes held each other's gaze until you refused to be lost in the beautiful unsurety of those dark brown eyes. So you stared back at the moon instead, wondering how you found time crumbling into nothing whenever you looked at him. You were trying to ignore the pangs of your heart, asking it why it had chosen now to fall for this half-human, half-curse you found so utterly captivating. 

Even with your back to him the reflection of him was clear beside you, not willing to leave your side. He was wearing whatever clothes the last guests had left. A black t-shirt and some loose sweatpants, and his hair was loose and silky at his shoulders from his shower, and his skin was still flushed from it, too. 

The image beside you, and the reality behind you caged you in, forcing you to face your true desires and the guilt that was tugging at your gut. He was innocently offering you space beside him to rest and your mind was everywhere else. You couldn’t ignore how seductive he sounded when he spoke this late at night, or how the sight of him reclining against the headboard with his thighs slightly spread like that was so sexually charged it was making your thoughts run wild. 

Without his usual clothing you could see how thick his biceps were, and how broad his chest really was. You longed for him to touch you, to hold you, to explore you so he could learn what being human really meant.

His aura and general demeanour was so undeniably strong it had you wondering how much longer he’d play this game with you, and what he’d do to you if you gave him the opportunity. But a part of you also doubted that he felt that way about you, or anyone for that matter.

“It’s cold over there,” he pressed again, no malice at all, only concern. “Yuuji told me that I'm naturally warmer, it must be because my blood circulates differently…So, you really should come and sleep here next to me.” 

You were freezing in your robe, unwilling to put your tattered uniform back on. So, you finally abandoned the window ledge, “What are you gonna do if I do?”

His face furrowed, “Whatever you want me to do,” he sounded more like he was asking. He'd been around you long enough to pick up on the slither of the nuance aching to be acknowledged.

“I’d rather not hear you complaining any more beside me though.”

“Whatever.”

He cracked you a half-smile, happy to see you finally listening to him, even if you were being a brat about it. “Good.” 

You were sure you caught his gaze on your thighs as you neared the bed. You’d been chalking it up to him being curious, but the way his eyes had lapped over your bare skin tonight held something you could feel in your core. 

“Do you think I don’t notice when you do that? Earlier, too?” you blurted. 

His eyes darted to the door as if he planned to escape or as if Yuuji was about to burst in and declare that he room with him instead, rather than the tall black haired boy he’d been attached to the hip with since they reunited.

“I don’t want to fight with you. Yuuji respects you-“

He looked up at you, those dark eyes alight with something reminiscent of relief and perhaps yearning? His unwavering gaze sent flutters through you, it was like he was taking in every detail and leaving everything else alone.

“I’d appreciate it if you’d acknowledge my question at least.”

He pouted, noticing how your arms were tightly folded and how you were looking down at him with an indecipherable emotion. He hadn’t quite figured that one out yet, he thought, but he liked the look of it on you. It excited him somewhere, somehow. 

“Choso?” Your voice was a soft, hypnotising hum whenever you said his name all honeyed like that.

His mouth went dry as he really took you in. How the moon was creeping in to illuminate your skin, drifting down your throat to where your blood pumped. He briefly questioned whether all of these feelings were because your blood was special? How was it that you glowed like the sun and the moon had gifted you their light? Why were you so attractive to him? 

The bathrobe was much too big for you, the sleeves large and encasing your wrists, but it cinched in your waist. You had such an attractive shape, one that was so different to his own. He’d spent far too long trying to conjure up how you must look in his mind, but he could never form the image. Clothes were always in the way, taunting him, teasing him. 

“Choso!”

“Yeah, yeah-“ His eyes widened as you closed the gap between you both, kneeling tentatively in front of him. He quickly brought his legs to his chest and turned away from you. 

You scoffed, “You’re the one that wanted me over here so bad.”

Blood was thundering in his ears and his skin was burning so hot he feared he was about to explode into a thousand different pieces. He needed to hold himself together because he felt like if he looked at you he’d be doomed. Maybe his worst worries were true, he couldn’t be around humans like you, at his core he was nothing but a curse. What if you caused his body to show him yet another reaction? One that was weird? One you would hate?

“I know,” he mumbled, curling up on his side, he appeared to be shaking slightly, as he rocked his hips every few seconds. He was trying to elevate the pressure building in his lower half that was making him feel like he might burst. “I still do.”

You sighed, leaning over his body to assess his face. “Now you’re just worrying me.” You rested your hand on his forehead and he groaned. 

“Why are you burning up like this? Were you not supposed to shower or something? I don’t see how you’re any different from us in that regard?”

He groaned into his fist, “Ever since I lost my brothers, and I met Yuuji. I've been feeling and experiencing things I never have before. I thought the worst and the best were over. But now, you?” 

He was groaning like he was in pain. “I don’t think I can take it any longer.”

“Hey, calm down.” You bit your lip, “Take what? Should I get Yuuji?”

He quickly shook his head.

“Then I guess I’ll keep my eye on you tonight.”

The bed dipped beside him as you laid down, curling your body up like his. He froze, staring at you and your mouth, your lips looked so soft, he ached to touch them.

“Listen, I’m sorry for snapping at you. It’s not like I don’t trust you.” You paused, “You’re interesting, Choso. I’m just intrigued by you. I don’t know what you think of me, I guess that’s why I want to know why you stare at me like you do?”

His brows pinched together.

“Like earlier?”

“Was I?”

You nuzzled closer to savour the sweet treat of his scent. It was nothing and everything human all at once; sweet, and vaguely like metal.

“Maybe Yuuji hasn’t told you this…but like, you can’t just stare at people's bodies so obviously.”

“Their faces are better?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Got it,” he said slowly, but then he noticed you had nothing under your robe. He wondered if your nipples were hard because he could see goosebumps spreading over your skin.

His eyes settled on the space free from your robe. “And I…was staring at your body?” 

“Yeah.”

Your eyes followed his, watching him grow more shameless by the second. With every doubt you had, a shaky breath or a small noise would escape him, that had you questioning if he felt the same desire for you. Seconds felt like minutes, as Choso allowed his gaze to roam freely of you, as you allowed him to. 

“And…you don’t like that?” he whispered after what felt like forever, making your heart beat faster with all of these stolen whispers.

“You don’t like when I stare?” 

Time slowed and all other sounds ceased to exist to him, he could hear every bat of your lashes, and every hesitant swallow. He was watching you so carefully he barely blinked. “I want you to tell me why.” 

Then you did it, the thing that confirmed everything for him as you clenched your thighs together, ever so slightly. His own were locked firmly together, as he could feel something was happening there that he couldn’t explain. Maybe you were experiencing the same thing, he thought. He didn’t want to grapple with doubt when this might be the only time he had with you like this.

“It’s just not something you should do,” you finally replied, curt and crisp, but the way your voice shook suggested anything but. He could feel the heat emulating from you now. You were on fire, too, or at least he hoped you were, because he was finally at bursting point. 

“I want to show you what you do to me. Do you want to see?”

Your lips parted to speak but before you could he was sitting up and gesturing to the thick bulge in his pants. 

“This. This is mine,” he whispered, leaning in so his breath brushed your neck. “You know what’s happening to me, don’t you?”

You throbbed and pulsed for him, weakened by your desire. “You really are getting used to this whole human thing admirably fast. It��s endearing, honestly. You want sex and you’re already figuring it out?-“

“I don’t want to just get you pregnant-“

The tension broke with your laughter, “That’s not all sex is for, Choso. There’s many ways to do it, did you know that?”

“There’s another way?” 

“Choso, if I show you, you can’t go around telling everybody, okay?”

“Is it special?”

“Not every time. But it can be. Shall I explain first?”

“Yes.”

“People have sex because it feels really good. When a man and a woman have sex, yes, they can produce life. But people have sex mostly because it feels good, are you understanding me here?” 

He nodded, “It can be called fucking too. Sex is sometimes called fucking.”

He leaned closer with his eyes glued to your lips. “How did you know that’s what I wanted?”

You swallowed as he studied your face so intently, “Because you’re hard, right?”

He frowned in confusion, rushing to check his stomach, “Where?”

You couldn’t help but laugh again, “Oh you’re too sweet. Sit back.”

He let go of your hand and leant against the headboard awaiting your next move. You couldn’t help but wonder how long he could remain this composed? 

You carefully lowered yourself on his lap, watching him wince, you knew it was because his cock was probably growing more sensitive by the minute. Due to his abilities, his blood was in a frenzy everywhere.

“You’re curious, aren’t you? About my body?”

Your words were all he needed for his body to act for him, as he reached and ripped your robe open and apart, “Choso,” you stammered, “you should have asked!”

His hand cupped your throat carefully, thumbing your thudding pulse point. “I knew you wanted that. Your heart has been beating like this since you laid down. You want to show me your body too, and you want me to touch it. Explore it. Don’t you?”

He smirked at you, and he looked so gorgeous it hurt.

“You want sex, don’t you? But are you sure you want it with me? I don't know what to do.”

You lifted his chin and smiled, making that primal part of him go even crazier, “It’s okay. I still want it with you, Choso.”

In the rush of the moment he suddenly realised what he wasn’t laying his eyes on, and he gasped as he finally did, though all to himself. “I can touch you?”

You nodded and he worked the robe down your arms, he was mesmerised, brown eyes glimmering in the low light. His breath growing heavier at the sight, “You’re so soft,” he stroked you so gently it turned you into mush. His hands rose up and down the dips of your curves, over and over as he appreciated the unique shape of you. It seemed like he wanted to commit your every breath to memory.

“You’re beautiful,” he said under his breath as he cupped your breasts, rubbing your nipples with his thumbs. “They’re so beautiful…You’re so beautiful.”

He leaned forward to rest his face in your breasts, locking a hand with yours. As he listened to your frenzied heart and toyed with your nipple, mesmerised by your body. 

You ran your fingers through his hair and he moaned softly, pulling away to touch and grab at you all over again. His eyes locked on yours, watching the way you were getting worked up from his every touch. He noticed how much faster your heart beated when his hand stroked down your centre and neared lower. So he paused at your abdomen. 

“You’re…exquisite.” His eyes were in yours like they always were, intense and full of anticipation. “Here, this part of you too.” He was flushed all the way up to his ears. “What do I call it?”

You smirked, “My stomach?”

He was trembling, trying to contain himself. Shaking his head, he asked a wordless question. You smiled, and he took that as assurance to venture further, cupping the hot heat between your legs. “You look so pretty like this, when I’m touching you here,” he whispered, watching your teeth sink into your lip as your arousal drowned his fingertips. 

“My pussy? You’re touching my pussy,” you whispered. “Do you like it?” 

He nodded eagerly, “This is where I put mine?”

“Do you want to?”

He nodded again, “Can I…look at it? Closer?”

“You can do what you want with it, Choso.” You cupped his face, leaning close. “I want you to do whatever feels natural to you.” You kissed along his jaw as you spoke, he quivered at each one. 

“I think you’re more human than you give yourself credit for. A curse might have had its way with me by now and I know you must be bursting to try these new things as they come. So we’re going to do something special first.”

“What?”

“We’re gonna kiss. Kissing is done in all kinds of ways, you kiss your family on the cheek, normally. You kiss lovers on the lips. You kiss people you have sex with on the lips. It feels really good. Got it?”

“You’re going to show me though, aren’t you? You’re going to lead me.”

“Yeah, you ready?”

He nodded, “We’ll close our eyes, and then I’m gonna kiss you, got it? My lips will touch yours, and then you’ll let nature take its course from there. Don’t worry about being too rough with me,” you eyed his hands that were now resting at his sides, “You won’t hurt me. I’m a sorcerer, remember? It would take a lot to do that.”

“Then come here and give me your lips.” He tugged your mouth onto his, your lips meeting his eager ones, you thought he’d need a second to adjust to the sensation, but in a single second you were being slammed down onto your back. He clutched your face in his hands so he could kiss you without any distractions, it felt like he’d never let go. Everytime you moaned, he would too, like every kiss bonded you closer together.

He kissed you like he’d been waiting years for this, rutting his clothed cock into your naked, wet centre. You slid your tongue against his and he started to grunt, and his skin grew so hot against yours you wondered if he might set you both alight.

He was quick, and eager, pulling away to rip away his shirt, but earnest as he grabbed and then placed your hands on him. You made sure he felt your desire too, kissing all over him, finding that sensitive place just under his ear to suck and kiss. But then he was fighting you, just so he could kiss down your throat to get your tits once more, learning and learning.  “I can kiss anywhere?”

“Yeah,” you moaned.

His eyes darkened with lust as he gripped both your breasts, running his teeth all over them and sucking until your blood rose to the surface in the shapes of his lips.

“I saw a lifetime when I saw you. I saw you, and I felt it all. I thought that was your technique, that you were going to lure me in and kill me with your beauty. I was wrong. Thank you for giving me your body. Trust me with it.”

He was gasping against your skin, running his hands up and down like you were about to disappear. And if his words were intense, his actions were even more so. “I want to kiss you forever.” 

You had no idea what to reply to him right now, but there was something so beautiful about how direct he was, he loved his brothers, he knew of emotions, like love and admiration. He knew what he felt for you and he could put it into these words.

Falling for this man was hardly unusual when what you felt was so real. 

“I trust you, Choso. I want you to kiss me for as long as you want to.”

“I can kiss here then?” he said, throwing your thighs over his shoulders as he gripped your hips and leered at your pussy.

“It’s so wet,” he hummed in awe, before he closed the space and kissed it. He let out such a loud groan you had to shush him, but then that was just it. He was sucking all over so your juices could dance through his taste buds. He was licking and sucking on your pussy with so much zeal you were surely louder than he was. 

Choso was learning fast. He knew that you surely couldn’t be this wet like this all the time, he gathered it was because your body was readying itself to take him. Which also meant you wanted to take him, he wanted to take you. He’d yearned for you, he’d adored you. He adored this.

“I could do this forever,” he moaned, the grip bruising on your hips, as he locked you firmly in place so he could explore you. “Those noises of yours. Don’t stop. You won’t stop. I’m telling you not to stop them.”

“Yes Choso!”

He never thought the sound of his name could taste so sweet. He was groaning into you, sucking and licking until your swollen clit rubbing against his lips caught his attention. You prayed he’d be gentle as he spread your lips and looked at you, awaiting your reaction as he gave it a softer flick of his tongue. You shuddered so sweetly, squeezing his shoulders and tugging on his hair. 

“That’s a sensitive part of you, isn’t it?” He chuckled to himself, a grin on his lips, “My sensitive little human.” 

Your eyes widened at the words and he watched as more slick oozed from your throbbing sex. He laughed again, the deep sound reverberating deep in your core, he was so beautiful, so hypnotising. He brushed the hair from his eyes and kissed along your thighs, still keeping you spread. 

“I’ll be gentle with you. I won’t break you unless that’s what you want.”

The pleasure you were experiencing from a half-human half-curse should have been illegal, it probably violated some sorcery law somewhere but you didn’t care. Not when he was somehow saying and doing everything to make you tick. 

He kept licking and sucking until he found what you liked, and noticed the way you were shaking, the way your thighs were squeezing him tight so he didn’t stop. You gripped his hair, moaning his name as you came, the sweet taste filling his mouth until you had to forcibly push him away.

“Don’t keep your sweetness from me. That was all mine,” he grunted, travelling up your body with kisses. He took your face in one hand, his voice softening as he looked at you beaming in your afterglow, “Did I give you too much? Can’t take anymore of me?”  

You shook your head, barely able to catch your breath. “You made me feel so good, Choso, you gave me an orgasm. That’s important in sex, to give your partner orgasms, it’s what just happened.”

His thumb rubbed your lower lip, marvelling at the subtle mark he’d left from biting it earlier, and he smiled, “So you keep stimulating your partner until they can’t take anymore, releasing themselves on you.”

“You catch on fast.”

He grinned, kissing you deeply as he rutted himself into you. “Show me what to do,” he said breathlessly. “I need you, now.”

“Fuck Choso your cock, I can feel it.”

You started to tug down his sweatpants, taking the time to admire how broad and built he was, he really was no different from a human at all. He moaned with every press of your lips on his skin, he’d made them so swollen, kissing and biting on them like he was ravenous.

You released his cock from the confines of his pants and gasped, frozen at the sight. “Are you scared of me? Is it different?”

“No, it’s amazing…” you licked your lip, “It’s just so big.”

The warm weight of his hand landed on your stomach, he rubbed there, reassuring whilst also obviously trying to calculate this himself, “But you want it, don’t you?” he murmured, soft, “So we can make it fit, can’t we? We have enough of this together.”

He was so clumsy as he touched himself it made your heart swell, gathering the slick that was pooling down his cock. He took it, and made sure to cover your pussy in it, pausing when his finger slipped inside of you with ease. But then you moaned so deliciously he found his jaw growing slack, eager to keep pleasing you. 

“That’s why you’ve got this little hole haven’t you? It stretches to fit things inside, so it’s going to fit me inside like it’s doing right now.”

You quickly nodded, beyond fucked out by this man as he continued to stuff his precum into your pussy. “Yes Choso.”

“You’re so beautiful like this,” he grunted, stuffing in more of his fingers to fuck you even better. “Naked and free.” 

“You can put it in now, Choso. It’ll fit. I want it.”

“Because you want me don’t you?”

“Yes Choso.”

You watched him, gripping the base of himself and aligning his heavy cockhead to your opening. His face was lost in pleasure, lost to every sensation, he was beautiful like this too, you thought. 

“Only me?”

“Only you, Choso.”

“Then let me see everything,” he whispered against your forehead, large hands folding you and spreading your thighs wide. “You’re so beautiful. I want to see it all.”

“Please be gentle,” You whimpered, feeling him start to push in, you braced yourself, hanging on to him tight. 

He groaned into your cheek as he felt resistance from you, no matter how good you felt he’d rather die than hurt you. “Is there another way?”

“Lie down.”

He did as you said, watching in awe as you were quick to straddle him, oozing slick all over his thighs. You still wanted him just as much as he wanted you and that excited him to no end. Even if he was a challenge and clearly more than you were used to.

You hovered as you aligned yourself with his cock, and he moaned as you finally touched him. And as you sunk yourself onto his cock he gripped your hips so tight you yelped, before your voice melted into a moan in unison with his.

“More,” he whimpered, as you stopped halfway, panting at the sensation. “Let me in.”

“Trying, Choso.”

“I want to feel all of you. All of your pussy.” His voice was low, and close to breaking as you throbbed on him. 

“That’s it,” he stroked his thumbs in comforting circles, “Are you going to let me feel you?” 

You quickly nodded, teeth sunk into your lip. His voice was as arousing as his cock, “Give me a minute, Choso. I can do it.”

“Does it hurt?”

You nodded and he pondered for a moment before he took his thumb to your clit, rubbing until you moaned. Then slowly, naturally, as if your body was melting into his, you made your way down the thick inches of him.

“You’re doing good, so good for me. You can take all of me inside. You’re strong.” He was so out of his mind he didn’t even know what he was cooing to you, but he just wanted to put you at ease. 

“You pretty little human. Taking my body like this because you want your pussy fucked? Right? You like my cock inside you? Stretching you out?”

“Choso!” You groaned as he fully bottomed out, hands landing on his shoulders for support. “I love it, you feel so good. You’re making me feel so good.”

He whined at your words before composing himself, his lips trailing down your skin. “I am? Are you too weak now? Do you need me to help you feel good? Yuuji said you were a good teacher. He was wrong,” he taunted, kissing the side of your face as he gripped you.

His hands sunk into your ass as their final resting place, appreciating the softness there too, “You need to show me what to do, just once.”

“I can’t,” you whined, tears of pleasure flowing down your cheeks at how full you were. “Look at yourself. Your cock is so big.” You breathlessly gestured to your stomach. 

His eyes widened as he pushed his palm onto your belly, feeling how deeply he was penetrating you, “You have to use me and make yourself feel good. That’s all, Choso.” You barely managed your words, eyes barely open as the pleasure he was giving you threatened to break you apart. 

“I understand. Leave it to me,” he groaned, kissing your neck, as he started to move you off and on his cock, “We move together until we orgasm. You’ve never had a cock like mine so you can’t move, huh?” 

He experimentally snapped his hips into yours and you whimpered so loudly he soon followed. Although he knew nothing of what was lewd and what wasn’t, he somehow knew that the sound you’d made was nothing but filth and that he’d done something you’d desperately needed. 

He did it again and again, until he was drilling up into you and delighting in all of the sounds you were making, gasping from how good you felt. “Choso, your cock feels so good inside. It’s the best.”

“Then you never need another one, if only I make you feel this good. No other cock will ever feel the same,” he grunted, “You’re mine now, you beautiful woman.”

You kissed him messily in reply, barely able to form words as he fucked up into you until you were shaking and moaning into his mouth because you were coming all over him. “Then you’re mine, Choso. I showed you this, how to feel good. It won’t feel good if another human do-“

You gasped as his hand slammed over your mouth and you were on your back once more. He was folding you whilst holding back on finishing in minutes and he didn’t even know how impressive that was.

“Don’t say it. I don’t want another human near me like this. Only you. I told you, I saw you. I saw everything. I know that I’m different. But I can fuck you better, I know I can. You like what I’m doing to your body. I know, I know, I know, you do,” he chanted as he groaned into you, balls smacking hard against you as he ravaged you. 

All you could do was hold tight and brace yourself as you whimpered. 

“Mine, mine, mine. So, so, beautiful,” he grunted.

Tears pricked your water lines at the intensity, you felt so loved, and safe in his embrace like this. 

You could feel him twitching inside of you, and you could see him holding back. “When you orgasm, Choso. Your cum will be different, it will be messier than mine.”

“Is that the stuff that breeds you? It’s going to shoot inside you, isn’t it?” he stammered. “You don’t want it? How do I control it?” 

“You can’t, but that’s okay, I won’t get pregnant, I take something for that. So when you feel like it’s getting too much, give in. You can let go. You’ve already done so well.”

“I can fill you up with my seed?” He stretched your arms above you to take both your hands in a single clasp, cupping your chin with the other. 

“Look at me. Why won’t you get pregnant? Because I’m not fully human?”

There was a sadness in his eyes, but it was being blown out completely by his desire. 

Why was this man so hot without realising it? His brow as all furrowed, his face flushed, fucking you so hard it was now dawning on you how loud you both were being. “It’s a pill I take,” you moaned as he slammed into that spot inside that had you creaming on him again. “I-I told you.”

“Then I’ll pretend,” he grunted, gripping your hips hard as he fucked into you like he was trying to breed you.

“Like I’m going to fuck my seed into you so I can keep you forever. No man can have you if you’re filled with me.”

“I want your cum, Cho!”

“I know you do! You’re a needy little human taking my cock even though it’s too big for you, wanting my cum to fill up your pretty little hole.”

“I want it, I want it,” you moaned into his ear, wrapping your arms around him tighter. Your voice only made it worse, he pinned you down even harder, kissing and licking up your tears. 

He was whimpering now, all of the pressure building in his core, he could feel it, the very sensation you were talking about. “You’re lucky I haven’t split you in two with my strength. But you take it, you take me in your pussy, waiting for every last drop of me.”

The loud smacks of his hips on yours were no louder than your sounds. He was fucking you like he’d never get the chance again. 

“I wish I could breed you. Then everyone would know, I’d know. That you’re mine, all mine,” he was rambling as he came, holding you tight with his tongue down your throat. 

You felt the insane amounts of cum spurting inside of you until the noises were so lewd it was near comical. Until there was so much cum he was slipping out of you and coming all over your stomach and the sheets too. Your name laced in every breath.

He groaned out your name, falling into your arms so could put him back together again. You kissed wherever you could, praising him through your breathlessness. You both rested for several of these precious moments. It seemed like the night had finally calmed outside of the hotel too, as had you both, after purging what had been brewing between you both since you’d first laid eyes on each other.

“Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” he asked, running his lips across your jaw.

“No, not at all.” You continued to soothe him, running your hands through his hair. “But now we have a whole lot to talk about. I wouldn’t normally fuck someone so soon that I saw a future with.”

He made a little hmph sound, “Why?”

“It normally comes after getting to know someone.”

“We’ll have all the time in the world for that,” he said gently, flipping you below him as he caged you beneath him. 

“Won’t we?” he urged, folding up your thighs as he guided himself back inside. His voice was desperate all over again. “So,” he leant close, his lips brushing yours. He tried to resist, but gave in to taste your lips, taking the time to kiss you with so much unbridled affection it made your chest hurt. Before he finally spoke again, “So, stay alive for me, and I will for you.”

©mrsackermannx: do not repost, plagiarise, translate or modify my works.

[starrierknight]

❣ TAGLIST FORM | BYF + DISCLAIMERS ❣

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎: hi, darlings!! this is my first kinktober, which is so exciting! while this doesn't adhere to the official 2023 kinktober prompts, i hope it will be enjoyable for you all! 𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐒: this event exclusively features dom!reader x sub!character. the reader inserts are always gender neutral and written with AFAB anatomy in mind. all fics will be published at 11:30pm BST. all writing for this event will be tagged under ꒰ 🝮 ꒱ — kt 23 ❣ REBLOGS ARE VERY APPRECIATED! ❣

𝟎𝟎𝟏. 𝐃𝐔𝐌𝐁𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | megumi fushiguro

❥ dumb doll | 1.8k

You have a bad habit of breaking your favourite toys.

𝟎𝟎𝟐. 𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | ryomen sukuna

❥ poor thing | 7k

"O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I!" — William Shakespeare, via Hamlet Act 2, Scene 2

𝟎𝟎𝟑. 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏 | getou suguru

❥ just us / microcosm | 7.2k

“I am tired, I have a colossal need of you.” — Albert Camus, from a letter to María Casares written c. June 1944

𝟎𝟎𝟒. 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐓𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | toji fushiguro

𝟎𝟎𝟓. 𝐏𝐔𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐇𝐘𝐁𝐑𝐈𝐃 | yuuta okkotsu

❥ chew toy | 3.1k

Your puppy missed you while you were at work. Won’t you give your dog a bone(r)?

𝟎𝟎𝟔. 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐄 | yuuta okkotsu

❥ guilty pleasure | 5.2k

“It is always pleasant to divulge a secret under dramatic circumstances.” ― Thomas Burnett Swann, Day of the Minotaur

𝟎𝟎𝟕. 𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 | gojo satoru

❥ glutton for punishment | 7.2k

✩ ✩ ✩ ✩ ✩ 'Cause I'm all that you want, boy / All that you can have, boy / Got me spread like a buffet / Bon a—, bon appétit, baby — Katy Perry, Bon Appétit

𝟎𝟎𝟖. 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑/𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐕𝐄 | toji fushiguro

𝟎𝟎𝟗. 𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊 | choso kamo

𝟎𝟏𝟎. 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 | gojo satoru

❥ drunk 'n' nasty | 8.8k

“Here's to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life.” ― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Beautiful and Damned

𝟎𝟏𝟏. 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀 | getou suguru

𝟎𝟏𝟐. 𝐊𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐇𝐘𝐁𝐑𝐈𝐃 | gojo satoru

𝟎𝟏𝟑. 𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐀𝐒𝐌 𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐀𝐋 | yuki tsukumo

𝟎𝟏𝟒. 𝐓𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 | megumi fushiguro

𝟎𝟏𝟓. 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊 | ryomen sukuna

𝟎𝟏𝟔. 𝐆𝐔𝐍𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 | gojo satoru

𝟎𝟏𝟕. 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄 | choso kamo & yuki tsukumo

𝟎𝟏𝟖. 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | getou suguru

𝟎𝟏𝟗. 𝐄𝐗𝐇𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐌 | gojo satoru

𝟎𝟐𝟎. 𝐁𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐇𝐘𝐁𝐑𝐈𝐃 | choso kamo

❥ like rabbits | 5.3k

You both like the thrill of the chase, but he likes being caught more. You were fully willing to take advantage of this fact (and him).

𝟎𝟐𝟏. 𝐏𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐗 | toji fushiguro

𝟎𝟐𝟐. 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐈 | getou suguru

❥ lit fuse | 6.3k

“Each of us is born with a box of matches inside us, but we can't strike them all by ourselves.” ― Laura Esquivel, Like Water for Chocolate

𝟎𝟐𝟑. 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 | maki zen'in

𝟎𝟐𝟒. 𝐅𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍/𝐏𝐄𝐆𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐆 | choso kamo

𝟎𝟐𝟓. 𝐊𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘/𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 | gojo satoru

❥ bite the hand that feeds | 5k

“Love is a sacrament that should be taken kneeling, and Domine non sum dignus should be on the lips and in the hearts of those who receive it.” ― Oscar Wilde, De Profundis

𝟎𝟐𝟔. 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | ryomen sukuna

𝟎𝟐𝟕. 𝐒𝐄𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | nanami kento

❥ work hard, play rough | 4.4k

You don’t work or play by the rules. So what if that’s unfair? This is a dog-eat-dog world, and the losers get left behind.

𝟎𝟐𝟖. 𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐔𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 | yuuta okkotsu

𝟎𝟐𝟗. 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 | maki zen'in

𝟎𝟑𝟎. 𝐌𝐈𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐗 | getou suguru

❥ pretty when you cry | 3.5k

You did his eyeliner and one thing led to another. Who can blame you, though? He had it coming (pun intended).

𝟎𝟑𝟏. 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄 | unspecified m!character

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: I aim to complete 15/31 fics this year (2023) , and then finish off the rest next year (2024). this is a two year event! (⋆ˆ ³ ˆ) ✎~

these works belong to STARRIERKNIGHT . please refrain from plagiarising any of my works and do not repost/translate/modify/copy onto any platforms.

[exhuastedpigeon]

Hiatus Buddie Fic Rec - Month 2 June 16 - July 15

Here's the second rec list! Here's my favourite fics that I've read that were posted between June 16 and July 15

0-5k

if your heart wears thin by devirnis / @devirnisGen | 986 words He knows the shift was disheartening, but the little rain cloud of gloom that’s been hanging over Buck’s head since he fell in the water has Eddie mildly concerned.

You with the dark curls, you with the watercolour eyes by thewolvesof1998 / @thewolvesof1998

Mature | 1.6k The morning after Buck and Eddie finally get together.

Stuck On You by rosebuddiekin / @giddyupbuck

Teen | 2.5k Eddie jokingly gives Buck stickers that have positive saying on them, but it quickly gets out of hand.

Not A Trick of the Mind (Only Love) by Bookbee, JJK / @trenchcoatsandtimetravel & @painting--words

Teen | 4.2k Buck wakes up in hospital with amnesia and thinks Eddie is married to someone else.

I could spend the whole day just gettin' by by rowan_wood / @transboybuckley Gen | 4.4k “I’m sick,” Buck said, eyes closed, when he could sense Eddie reached the loft. (Sick fic)

Find a remedy by BladeoftheNebula Teen | 4.7 Buck and Eddie tell Christopher they're dating. It doesn't go well.

5k-10k

Of Sound Mind (And Memory) by henry988

Not rated | 6k In the hours after Buck is struck by lightning, Maddie is faced with retrieving the last will and testament of her brother, just in case. Together, with Eddie, they learn more about their brother and friend.

give me a sign, I want you next to me by 42hrb Teen | 7k The 118 knows Buck has a really cute kid and a partner he loves, they just think that partner is his husbands ex-wife.

we don't need to play games like these (you won me long ago) by withmeornotatall / @chronicowboy Explicit | 10.4k five times buck was turned on by Eddie's complete lack of rizz and the one time he realised what his new kink was for

10k-20k

you been looking for love (let me show you how it's done) by wikiangela / @wikiangela Explicit | 12.2k Eddie is a tease, Buck is horny and jealous of Eddie dating, and a regular evening takes an unexpected turn.

Sixth time's the charm by CorgiQueen14 Teen | 14.2k The mid-lawsuit time loop fic.

20k - 30k

in the night we trust by glorious_spoon / @glorious-spoon

Explicit | 29.2k Eddie and Buck start sleeping together when they're all stuck at Buck's place during lockdown. It still takes them almost three years to notice that they're in love.

30k +

i know you're gone now, but i'll still wait for you by roephobic Teen | 32.1k the one where Buck leaves and Eddie breaks down.

you and i'll be safe and sound by spaceprincessem / @spaceprincessem

Teen | 50.8k buddie hunger games au

Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars / @cal-daisies-and-briars Teen | 57.9k After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.

i love you (and i like you) by withmeornotatall / @chronicowboy Explicit | 64.4k he parks and rec au in which buck is leslie and eddie is ben feat. gay penguins

a body, a knife, hold steady by bvckandeddie (zukkababey) / @bvckandeddie Mature | 67.4k Buck and Eddie meet, fall in love, build a life together, and discover they're rival assassins—exactly in that order.

[wangxianficfinder]

In The Mood For...

June 22nd

~*~

1. Hi, i really like your blog, it is very helpful, i was wondering if you could find a wangxian fanfics that are completely fluff, just wangxian living their post-canon, domestic lives, as husbands. humor is preferred.

Thank you, if you have already replied to a request similar to mine, please just link that blog in the answer. @honestlyewww

As You Like It by cosmicmilktea (T, 8k, wangxian, post-canon, food as a metaphor for love, tea, light angst, fluff)

The (Several) Convenient Kidnappings of the Chief Cultivator by the Yiling Patriarch by misscam (M, 3k, WangXian, Humor, Spoilers, mush of series and novel, some adult action, Switching)

Wei Wuxian, God of Fertility by tired (T, 19k, WangXian, Family Feels, Crack Treated Seriously, Crack, the juniors get REAL drunk, Gossip, POV Multiple, surprisingly not an mpreg fic, Kissing, Self-Esteem Issues, Discussion of Porn and Sex, Post-Canon, SOFT SOFT SOFT, married wangxian, Fluff and Humor)

The Grandmaster of Demonic Reproduction by likeafox (E, 7k, WangXian, Kid Fic, not mpreg, but not-not mpreg?, Pregnancy Kink, Come play, LSZ deserves a sibling)

~*~

2. Hi, I'm itmf Wei Ying with split personality (Preferably canon era) Thank you!

~*~

3. For the next ITMF, I wanna see travelling with Li'l Apple! Gimme your fics that talk about our fave cantankerous donkey. @mreisse

Wearing Down Every Bone by CSHfic, VSfic (E, 30k, WangXian, Groundhog Day, Time Loop, Temporary Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Case Fic, Curses, Pining, Getting Together, Time Travel, Night Hunts, Hurt wwx, Mystery, Angst with a Happy Ending, Use Your Words, Mutual Pining, Depression and Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, gratuitous use of empathy)

lost my fear of falling by thefireplanet (E, 30k, WangXian, HuaLIan, Bodyswap, Wei "My Intrusive Thoughts Are Totally Not Winning" Wuxian, Hua "My Husband Said I Had to Help You" Cheng, YLLZ WWX, WWX-centric, WangXian-centric, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Violence, Case Fic, Canon-Typical Wangxian Sex Things, One (1) Obscure War Movie Reference, mawage, Mawage is what brings us togeder tooday)

~*~

4. ITMF where JYL and JWY reliazed that WWX is in danger if he stay in Lotus Pier. That threats can come from YZY or JFM or the cultivation world. Just that i want to read a fic where JYL and JWY try to protect WWX @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

🧡 To have and to hold by Moominmammashandbag (M, 78k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Major character injury, CQL verse, Happy Ending)

The Hate and Love of family by Moonlit_dewdrops (T, 20k, WangXian, WIP, Abuse, Near Death, Bad Parent YZY, YZY's A+ Parenting, Protective JC, Protective JYL, Recovery, Trauma, Protective LWJ, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Dynamics, Good Uncle LQR, Not YZY Friendly, Hurt WWX, Panic Attacks)

I Have Arranged to Tie You to Me by xxxMiaHikarixxx (G, 59k, WIP, WangXian, Lan protective team, Time Travel, Past, LWJ oriented, Arranged Marriage, Boys In Love, Soulmates, Fix-It, Jiang siblings, not jiang parents friendly, Soft LWJ, Protective LWJ, Genius WWX)

a life without sun by thankgodforpandas (T, 30k, WangXian, JC & LXC, JC & WWX, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives, Mutual Pining) which is a bit different but features a protective Jiang Cheng who works to help Wei Wuxian find happiness.

What If..... Jiang Cheng Understood? by ToxicAngel13 (M, 66k, WIP, WangXian, Ribbons, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, WangXian Get Married in the Cold Springs Cave, Protective JC, Confused WWX, Angry LWJ, Fix-It of Sorts, Good Uncle LQR, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, POV LQR, YZY Bashing, POV JFM, Not JFM Friendly, Hurt/Comfort, Protective NHS)

~*~

5. Hi!!! I couldn't find a tag for wwx with short hair, so I was wondering if anyone had any recs? I would prefer for it to not be a modern au tho, thank you!

Mud on Your Feet by AvoOwO (Not Rated, 59k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Nightmares, Sentient Burial Mounds, Burial Mounds, Possession, Panic Attacks, Night Terrors, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Good Sibling JC, Hurt WWX, Soft WangXian, Feels, Blood and Injury, Hallucinations, Delusions, JC Loves WWX, Insomnia, Good Sibling WWX, Sleepwalking, Sleeptalking, LWJ just wants to sleep with his husband, Protective JC, WWX Sees Dead People, LJY pulls through, POV LWJ, Cloud Recesses, PTSD, Post-Canon, YLLZ WWX, resentful energy, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Thirteen Years of WWX's Death, WWX's Three Months in the Burial Mounds, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, WWX is tired, LWJ literally just wants to sleep with WWX again is that too much to ask for??, Soft JC, Yunmeng Siblings Feels) wwx gets short hair near the end

Cloudy Memories Recessed by FirefliesNLightningBugs (M, 7k, WIP, JC & JYL & WWX, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Sunshot Campaign, Good Person JZX, Good Sibling JC, Good Sibling JYL, Amnesia, (kind of), Weird Magic, Demonic Cultivation, post wwx disappearing during sunshot campaign, POV Alternating, POV JC, POV JYL, POV WWX) wwx short hair request, there is a ao3 wip called "cloudy memories recessed" by FirefliesNLightningBugs that's set during sunshot post-escape from bm and his hair is so damaged it had to be cut off

~*~

6. Worlds most random in the mood for request… but is there any fic that features Transformers? The idea spawned in my brain and it’s haunting me. Autobots, Decepticons and Wangxian, I can’t be the first person to have thought of that. @cullen-blue23

~*~

7. recs of wwx sad or crying bc of lwj, and lwj feels guilty? thanks for all your hard work!

Honesty is the Best Policy (Except if You’re an Asshole) by piecrust (E, 22k, WangXian, Porn with Feelings, College/University)

🔒 Life is Like a Stranger by through_shadows_falling (T, 69k, wangxian, Kid Fic, Child LWJ, Child WWX, First Meetings, Canon Divergence, Cute Kids, Orphan WWX, Autism Spectrum, Fix-It, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Alternate Canon, POV LWJ, Growing Up Together, WWX raised at Cloud Recesses, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Puberty, Growing Up, Coming Out, teenage angst, Wet Dream, Pining, This fic gets a little raunchier as the kids become teens, But it won’t get too explicit, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Spanish Translation, Brief mentions/moments of WWX kissing others in chapter 22 but only on the cheek, also characters kiss WWX on the cheek in chapter 23, but his real first kiss is with LWJ, Перевод на русский | Translation in Russian) Not sure if this is what 7 is looking for because both Wei Wuxian & Lan Wangji are children when Lan Wangji makes Wie Wuxian cry but Life is Like a Stranger. The crying and guilt take place in chapter 4.

Reconnaissance by TomatenMark (M, 2k, WangXian, POV LWJ, Post-Sunshot Campaign, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Arguing, Head Injury, LWJ loses his temper, Then instantly regrets it, WWX Whump, WWX Needs a Break, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Where are we? In what point of the timeline? Don't know, there are only vibes here)

~*~

8. itmf fics where there is no war, but wwx eventually leaves the jiang sect anyway--bonus points if it's an unavoidable result of wwx & jc's conflicting values. doesn't need to be bashing--i just want to explore a timeline where wwx can make the choice for himself to walk away, rather than being pushed into a hundred corners by canon

Dispersing Clouds by dreamingofcake (E, 258k, WangXian, WIP, Canon Divergence, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Abusive YZY, Canonical Child Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Eventual Sex, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm (Background Character), Background Character Deaths, child deaths, Canon JC, Good Uncle LQR, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Cultivation Sect Politics, Homophobia, Heteronormativity, Feelings Realization, WWX is Not Oblivious) Pretty much exactly as requested. No war as the Wens are distracted by infighting, WWX leaves LP due to value conflicts

Debts of a Child Part 2 by Hauntcats (M, 111k, WangXian, YZY Bashing, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Angst and Feels, lots of anger, JC Bashing, not Jiang friendly, Angst with a Happy Ending, Content warning for icky spiders in later chapters., hurt no comfort for Jiang siblings.)

~*~

9. heyyy admins! any soulmate au's? thanks!

leading tone by silencemostofall (G, 32k, WangXian, Modern AU, Soulmates, with a lil twist, Eventual Happy Ending, Music, Orchestra, [Podfic] Leading Tone by silencemostofall by Beria1021)

pastel by antebunny (G, 6k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Soulmates, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Self-Esteem Issues, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unrequited Love, but not actually, no courtesy names)

Bleachwhite Linen by MonocerosRex (T, 44k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, LXC & WWX, JYL & WWX, JC & WWX, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, Modern, Soulmates, not the traditional kind of soulmates exactly, Hospitals, Fluff, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Touch-Starved, lwj and wwx are the softest husbands and they aren't even together yet, Getting Together, Marriage Proposal, Sibling Bonding, handwaving medical procedure and magical systems, worldbuilding is for chumps i'm here for the sugar, Sickfic, or more like convalescence fic but that isn't a tag, POV Multiple, Family Feels, Family Fluff, lxc is a troll and he ships wangxian so hard, wwx deserves and gets gets hugs, Sharing a Bed, Hair Washing, Sleepy Cuddles, Hugs, JYL is a queen)

it goes like this by moonsteps (T, 15k, WangXian, College/University, Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Timers, Humor, Fluff, Oblivious WWX, in which wwx is jealous… of himself, some drunken LWJ shenanigans, someone pls save JC, two idiots in love)

💖 nothing you confess by PorcupineGirl (T, 31k, WangXian, Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, POV Alternating, Golden Core Reveal, Depressed WWX, WWX Has PTSD, JC & LWJ Friendship, friendship may be too strong a word more like allies who are gonna love the shit outta post-burial-mounds WWX whether he likes it or not, Hurt/Comfort, Recovery)

💖 The Cruelty of Fate by Procrastination_Sensation (T, 15k, WangXian, Major Character Death, Canonical Character Death, Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending)

💖 What if you're making me all I was meant to be by WishingStar (T, 12k, WangXian, LSZ & LJY, Angst with a Happy Ending, Soulmates, Time Travel)

🔒💖 No Matter What I Do I Feel The Pain (With or Without Goose) by Trickster_Angel (T, 3k, WangXian, Soulmates, The Soulmate Goose of Enforcement, Crack, Not tagging animal abuse but they have to fight off the geese, Not Serious, Humor, First Kiss)

🔒💖 to hold the wind by androids_fighting93, artbysongs (E, 62k, WangXian, JYL/MM, Soulmates, Modern, Reincarnation, College/University, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Hurt/Comfort, Disownment, LWJ Loves Rabbits, Touch-Starved LWJ)

the heartlines on our hands by occultings (microcomets) (E, 47k, wangxian, Soulmates AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, First Time, Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death)

the river and the sea by sasamelons (T, 7k, WangXian, Soulmates, Arranged Marriage, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Falling In Love, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Mutual Pining)

🔒 Bright the Day We Met by ereshai (G, 1k, WangXian, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, POV Outsider, Fluff, Supportive LXC, Soulmates)

~*~

10. any fics where A) lwj is afraid of losing a-yuan/sizhui? not exactly afraid but like sad, scared etc? maybe something bad happened, or to the wens/wwx, or someone claims a-yuan is theirs, along those lines.

B) same thing but a-yuan is scared of losing lwj instead?

thank you for your work!

~*~

11. Itmf: (long fics only please)

A) lwj looooves carrying wwx in his arms. Doesn't matter whoever sees. It's his love y'all.

B) idol wwx or actor wwx or wangxian in showbiz

11B)

life, drama and action by Akai__hana (G, 13k, WangXian, XuanLi, singer!lwj, actor!wwx, Social Media AU, Fluff and Humor, Established Relationship, Fluff and Crack)

Some of You by tangerinechar (M, 60k, WangXian, Modern AU, Social Media, Actor AU, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Fluff, Love Confessions, Matchmaking, Light Angst)

The Fault in Our Stars by Vamillepudding (T, 17k, WangXian, Modern AU, Getting Together, Romantic Comedy, Comedy of Errors, Misunderstandings, the title makes it sound like a cancer story, it’s not a cancer story)

Ornaments Under the Stars by trippednfell (M, 62k, wangxian, Modern, Inspired by Hallmark Christmas Movies, the wangxian Hallmark Movie AU no one asked for, plot and title were randomly generated, Kidfic, Disabled Character, debilitating injury as substitute for missing golden core, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note, Angst with a Happy Ending, Guest starring Lan Zhan’s sky blue coat, The Coat deserves its own tag, disordered eating habits - not a major plot point, WIP)

All My Songs I Wrote to Find You by Winxhelina (T, 8k, WangXian, Social Media, Bullying, Immortal LWJ & WWX, Scheming NHS, Musicians, Explicit Language, Kissing, Making Out)

~*~

12. Can i ask for a recommendation for Time Travel like the Four Juniors (Lan Shizui, Jin Ling, Lan Jinyi and Ozouyang) (i'm so sorry if i spell there names wrong) went to the past and met there parents

Or the past went to the future

Time, Time, Time by skeletonofaplant (G, 44k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, LSZ & WWX, JYL & JL & JZX, LJY & LSZ, Time Travel Fix-It, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Identity Porn, Identity Reveal, Angst, Fluff, Junior Quartet Dynamics, Time Travelling Junior Ensemble, Junior Ensemble Shenanigans, Humor)

Time Travel, Obviously by nirejseki (Not Rated, 1k, Time Travel, Crack)

❤️ Tragedy is Not the End by Hobbsy3 (T, 358k, wangxian, Time Travel, Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Core Reveal, Canon Divergence from Qiongqi Pass, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Yunmeng sibling bonding, good dad wwx, good dad lwj, JZX Lives, JYL Lives, Junior Quartet Dynamics)

~*~

13. Hey guys! Any fanfic recommendations with Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji fighting and arguing, but with a happy ending? Especially if they are in an established relationship @livesformitski

KILF (Knits I'd Like To Fuck in) by ScarlettStorm (E, 168k, wangxian, modern, sex work, fiber arts, 2nd in series) this one has a substantial Wangxian fight that ends well

~*~

14. Hi!!! I have something for the next ITMF.

I'm feeling kinda angsty today, so are there any fics where Lan Zhan sacrifices himself for Wei Ying's happiness?

It could be any kind of sacrificial method and Wei Ying doesn't know of Lan Zhan's sacrifice until it's too late. Wei Ying could try getting him back through any means (time travel, necromancy, etc) except for sacrificing himself :D

Thank you and keep up the good work!

~*~

15. Hello! If you accept nsfw asks, I am looking for WangXian fics where dragonJi has *ahem* dragonly endowments downstairs. The classic antlers and tail is good too, but I am particularly looking for lemons where non-human anatomy comes into play. There is a bit of this in Paths Of Light And Darkness Converge, if anyone wants an example. Thank you! 🐉

🔒 dragons white to ride by RoseThorne (E, <1k, WangXian, Dragon LWJ, LWJ Has Two Penises, Multiple Orgasms, Implied Future Mpreg, First Time, Wedding Night, POV Third Person, POV WWX, Overstimulation, Podfic Welcome, Crack Treated Seriously)

~*~

16. For ITMF, I'm wondering if there are fics out there where LWJ & WWX can wield each others' swords. I've read something where WWX can use Bichen due to a partial core transplant from LWJ, but I'm interested in anything where the swords recognise their owner's soulmate? @thispatternismine

Lost and Found by dea_liberty (M, 36k, WangXian, JC & WWX, SL/XXC, Post-Canon, Found Families, a lot of feelings, Epilogue, Marriage, so many feelings, Some angst, Canon-Compliant, Brotherly Love, angst with happy ending, Much-needed reconciliations, outsider pov, Fix-It, WWX has some PTSD to deal with, Minor Violence) it's not the focus but it comes up in the first part of "Lost and Found" and is revisited near the end of the fifth part (LWJ can unsheathe and wield Suibian)

~*~

17. Hi, I have a request for itmf. Is there any wangxian fic where

a) Lan Zhan likes to take care of Wei Ying or in the simple thing,he has caretaking kink(is this the right word?) . Like The Second Jade of Lan's late but incendiary sexual awakening by KizuKatana

b) Any fic like A matter of time by mrcformoso. Where Lan Zhan keep wei ying for himself and wei ying like it. Or a time travel where lan zhan just, "you're mine" Or the friendship between Lan Zhan and Nie Huaisang to protect Wei Ying. Or anything that the 3 of them have dark personality(yandere)

Thank you for all your hardwork. Love you guys😘 @chibiizzy

17A)

The Dragon's Bride by jaws_3 (T, 34k, WangXian, Beauty and the Beast Fusion, Arranged Marriage elements, Slow Burn, sometimes ya get sent off to atone for ur villages misgivings and u just gotta deal, Dragon LWJ, Mutual Pining, Happy Ending, Spanish Translation Available)

Continuation by thefaceofno (T, 14k, WangXian, Canon Continuation, WWX builds a lotus pond in cloud recesses, Hair Brushing, Light Angst with a Happy Ending, Pining, gay disaster LWJ, Post-Canon Fix-It)

🔒 The Promises We Make by Mayarenerose (G, 34k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, LXC & LWJ, LWJ & WN, LWJ & JC, Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Fluff, Angst, Everybody Lives, Canon Divergence, Gratuitous Bed Sharing, LWJ: moves into the Burial Mounds, WWX: ??? wtf??? are you??? doing??, Rabbits, there are so many rabbits in this fic guys i cant even)

💙 this river runs to you by sundiscus (T, 53k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Mutual Pining, Dragons, Literal Sleeping Together, Tender wound tending)

❤️ the best of you by sysrae (E, 41k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, slightly undernegotiated kink, but in a very soft and consensual way, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, JFM and Madam Yu's A+ parenting, Dysfunctional Family, Mental Health Issues therapy is good actually, the most tender of railings, Reference to animal attacks/animal cruelty, descriptions of past violence)

Falling to the Rhythm by Selenay (E, 128k, WangXian, Modern: No Powers, Dance, Strictly Come Dancing Fusion, Ballroom Dancing, Dancer!WWX, Violinist LWJ, Pining While Dancing, Oblivious WWX, Gratuitous Costume Descriptions, Gratuitous dancing descriptions, Slow Burn, [Podfic] Falling to the Rhythm by semperfiona_podfic (semperfiona))

Work-Life Balance is Not A Thing by catbrainedschemes (E, 17k, WangXian, Modern AU, Workplace Relationship, Romantic Comedy, Idiots in Love, Oblivious WWX, Oblivious LWJ, Sexual Tension, Eventual Smut, but not that eventual, Pining, Dirty Talk)

17B)

Like stones on an unseen board by Vir_Abelasan (Not rated, 11k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, Dark LWJ, Older LWJ, Teacher LWJ, dark twin jades, Age Difference, Manipulation, Protective LWJ, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Corporal Punishment, Relatively canon-typical abusive Jiangs, WWX Get a Happy Ending, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Not Jiang Clan Friendly)

🔒 At heart by apathyinreverie (M, 36k, WangXian, WIP, Dark LWJ(Ish), Amnesia, WWX gets to be Not Okay after the BM, Hurt WWX, Recovery, Caring, Protective LWJ, Possessive LWJ, some definite manipulation, but not everything is as it seems, not nearly as dark as the tags make it sound, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Revea, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, kind of, Domestic WangXian, Fluff, WWX Goes to Gusu, Possessive WWX, WWX happily atticwifing away, Sunshot Campaign, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ)

~*~

18. Hi so I tried to find any fic that has this idea myself but I couldn't find any so I am here to ask this oh great finder to find me a fic that has wei ying dual wielding like he wheels two swords maybe one of them is Suibian and the other is like one of his parents blade or something I just want a fic that has him dual wielding it will be so cool

Take My Hand, Hold Me Tight by ThyNameIsAeschylus30 (M, 58k, WIP, HanXian, One-sided WangXian, Canon Divergence, Transmigration into MDZS, But WWX from his world transmigration to cannon WWX's world, BAMF WWX, Immortal WWX, Healer!WWX, Age Difference, Donghua WRH, Pining WWX, Minor WWX/OMC, Past Relationship(s), YZY Bashing, Bad Parents JFM and YZY, Canonical Child Abuse, Unrequited love for LWJ, Potentially OOC!WWX and others, JFM isn't getting bashed he's being gaslighted by WWX, Accidental Baby Acquisition) It's a WWX/WRH fanfic where WWX an immortal healer from another realm transmigrated because this version of him died. He uses both his old and his current sword if I remember correctly

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[bigfootsmom]

tastes good (when I choose it for myself) by bigfootsmom for @thequeenofcarvenstone

buddie • explicit • 7k

Buck and Eddie have always done things non-traditionally. Why would spending Buck’s rut together be done any other way? “Look at you, so fucking needy. What would people say if they saw what a cock whore you are?” A punched-out groan leaves Buck, his knuckles bone white where he’s gripping the sheets so hard Eddie is surprised they haven’t ripped yet. “They’d probably think it’s such a waste— big alpha cock and you don’t even use it.”

read on ao3

this is a prompt fill with the @911actions gotcha for gaza! check out how you can donate to the cause and request a prompt of your own! Prompt submissions will be closed June 17, 2024 11:59pm CST, but the donation links will stay live so people can continue to donate and show support.

[oknowkiss]

first sentence patterns

rules: list the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern! thank you for the tag, @wolfpants !! what i've learned from this is that i love to drop the reader into the middle of conversations and/or a moment of contemplation.

à bon chat || drarry || 35K || E

The thing about almost getting caught is, when done correctly, it’s invigorating. A rush of blood to the head, chaos unspooling around the eye of a storm.

jerk/off || drarry || 7K || E

Harry doesn’t remember how it happened, when he wakes up in Malfoy’s room.

the waiting || drarry || 43.5K || E

1 JUNE, 2015. 8:45 AM BRITISH SUMMER TIME Harry grips his mug of tea and doesn’t notice when the heat sears into his fingertips.

proven lands || drarry || 3K || E

“You’re late,” Draco calls down the long entrance hall. Harry squints, darkness sharp after weeks in the blinding winter sun.

the sun, shining above you || dronarry, dron, drarry || 14.5K || E

“Draco?” Harry says, in that way he does now – quiet and fond and a little unsure.

draco malfoy's substitute murder service || drarry, harry/charlie || 10.5K || E

When Harry joins the Curse Breakers shortly after his twenty-fifth birthday, he’s surprised to find himself assigned to the Department of Creatures, Cryptids, and Associated Calamities.

historians || drarry || 30K || E

“Now, don’t get upset, Harry,” Hermione said, looking at him in a way that was deeply upsetting.

100 beats per minute || drarry || 14K || E

Draco checked his watch. Again.

the long ways || drarry || 10K || M

The first time Harry sees Draco after the war they’re still at Hogwarts and he thinks, At least I’ll never have to see you again.

the july tree || drarry || 51K || E

Unlike Hermione and Ron, when Harry decided to return to Hogwarts for Eighth Year, it was less a decision and more of a compulsion. 

tagging in @citrusses @skeptiquewrites @sweet-s0rr0w @tackytigerfic @sorrybutblog @dodgerkedavra @geesenoises @basicallyahedgehog @thecouchsofa @nv-md @vukovich @mintawasalreadytaken @phoebe-delia @oflights and anyone else who would like to play, consider this an open tag!

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | June 24th-30th 2024

Happy Canada Day to all my fellow Canadians! Here comes a more reasonable weekly recap compared to last week :P

Complete

see the stars with my morning eyes by trippedandfell/ @trippedandfell (Teacher Buck AU | 3K | Teen): “So,” Buck announces, sitting down between Hen and Chimney at the concessions stand. “I think Eddie’s trying to get me to sleep with him and his fiancée.” or: Eddie calls Lucy his partner. Buck extrapolates.

kiss my lips, feel the rhythm of your heart and hips by Daffi_990_ao3/ @daffi-990 (Post-S7, Getting Together | 3K | Mature): After months of clawing at the ground and scraping through the mud of his memories of his relationship with Shannon, his childhood and a whole bunch of religious guilt, Eddie had finally accepted the truth about his marriage and himself. He’s queer. His sexuality isn’t the only thing he’s discovered though. Eddie Diaz is queer and he is in love with Evan Buckley.

Being Selfish by Inell/ @inell (Post-7x10: All Fall Down, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): It’s been a little more than six weeks since Eddie’s life became a chaotic mess. Luckily, he’s had Buck’s support and constant presence to help him get through it.

in the rough draft, [s]he loved you by iinryer/ @iinryer (S5, Outsider POV | 5K | General): during the flight home to LA after ramon's retirement party, eddie tries to write down some things he wants to say to buck

wrap your arms around me, baby boy by marviless/ @marviless (Getting Together | 6K | Teen): in which buck pretends to be asleep and overhears something he shouldn't.

🔥 i’ve seen a couple suns that set forever by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7, Christopher POV | 7K | General): Freshly home from Texas and faced with the prospect of his dad's feelings for Buck, Christopher's abandonment issues surface. A conversation with Bobby, and realizing the parallels between Buck's relationship with Bobby, and his relationship with Buck, gives Chris the perspective he needs.

i'll be the north star that takes you home by marviless/ @marviless (Post-S7, Getting Together | 8K | General): eddie is moving back to el paso for the summer.

Just to Chase the Pain Away by UnderwaterNinja/ @underwaterninja13 (BTHB: Public Humiliation, BDSM, Subdrop | 11K | Explicit): Buck makes the poor decision to go to a kink club to deal with his emotions. After he's left with no aftercare, someone comes to his rescue.

Firehouse Baby by Nejinee/ @nejineeee (S2-S7, Getting Together | 21K | Explicit): One day, Eddie put his hand on Buck’s thigh and Buck hasn’t stopped thinking about it since.

🔥 something touched me (like a knife-blade) by kithmet/ @kithmet (Alternate S7 Finale, Getting Together | 42K | Explicit): Eddie self-implodes. Christopher, seeking refuge, flees to Buck—whose priorities amount to, in varying order: take in the kid, get Eddie to talk��to him, and keep the three of them afloat in the process. (Oh, and Tommy’s there too. He thinks.)

🔥 Further Than Blood (Or Than Bones) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 50K | Explicit): Once, Eddie chose to save a newly turned against his better judgment. Five hundred years ago, Buck was saved by a rescuer he thought was a hallucination. Now they're together again and about to find out just how far either of them will go to try and deny what they are to each other.

🔥 Descendants of Cyrano by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (~S7, Dungeons&Dragons, Getting Together | 55K | Explicit): People have their characters romance each other all the time while playing Dungeons & Dragons. There's deep meaningful monologues and sometimes some crying. It's normal. "Normal" is definitely not the word for whatever Buck and Eddie are inflicting on the rest of the 118.

WIP

🔥 If You Can Make the Music by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, | 2/5 | 5K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 5 (Seaside): A year after a whirlwind two week love affair with bartender Buck in Galveston, Texas, Eddie Diaz finds himself coincidentally relocating to the area. But when he attempts to reconnect with Buck, he's in for an unfortunate surprise. (Part 3 of Coma-Verse)

Podfics

[podfic] but it feels like a fortress when the weather gets bad by TheBoyWhoWalksInTheLight/ @aro-of-artemis (Post-3x15: Eddie Begins | 20-30min | Teen): Buck has a nightmare about Eddie dying, but he also has a key to Eddie's house.

Re-Read

Like a Sack of Bricks by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Feelings Realization | 2K | Teen): One word from Christopher, and Eddie's realizing he's made a serious miscalculation about his best friend.

[guess-my-next-obsession]

Elementary, Finale:

pairing: pre-outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

rating: E (18+ only—i choose not to list warnings for this one as not to spoil anything but you know how we get down over here on GMNO, happy endings only. read at your own discretion.) unedited/not proofread (for now)

wc: 7k

series masterlist | joel masterlist

June, 2004

“Don’t you dare,” Joel ordered as he surprised you from the doorway of your bedroom—your former bedroom.

You stood in front of a stack of cardboard boxes labeled “linens”, your hands resting on two sides as though you were caught mid-lift. He walked over to you with a smirk, shaking his head before lifting the box for you.

“You’re already carrying enough,” he said, eyes falling to your swollen belly, six-months into your first pregnancy.

“I think I’m more than capable of carrying a box of sheets,” you countered with a matching smirk, reaching for the box that sat below the one he just stole from you.

“Uh-uh,” Tommy came rushing in, sweeping the box from your grasp. “You got my nephew to worry about.”

“How do you know I’m having a boy?” you asked, following your fiancé and soon-to-be brother in law out of your old home to watch them load the moving truck.

“I can just feel it,” he replied, earning a smile from his older brother.

“I’m still hopin’ for another girl,” Joel admitted as he walked down the rickety metal ramp to meet you as you stood in the walkway, his hands sliding over your belly to rest on your waist. He placed a sweet kiss on your lips before letting you go. “You should go sit in the sunroom with Sarah and Jessie. Make sure they’re keepin’ room for Jesus and all that.”

“Oh, let them be. Not like we have to worry about teen pregnancy—“

“Alright, alright.” Joel covered his ears, wincing at the thought. “Still, I don’t want you workin’ too hard.”

“Joel, I promise, I’m not working hard at all. You and Tommy won’t give me the chance.”

“That’s how it should be,” he countered, walking inside the house with you following behind.

“Guys, guess what?” Sarah and her newly defined girlfriend, Jessie burst into the half-packed kitchen as you stood slowly making your way through your pantry, organizing a keep pile and a donate pile. Joel lifted a brow at her as he started on taking the metal barstools that stood at your kitchen island apart so that they could take up less room in the truck. “Britney Spears is coming to San Antonio next month.”

“Praise to the heavens,” Joel mumbled under his breath, earning a chuckle from you as you rolled you eyes at his lackluster reaction.

“That’s fun!” you replied, looking at the two fifteen year-olds. “How much are tickets?”

“Like thirty bucks,” Jessie sighed, frowning. “My mom’s gonna make me work at the restaurant to earn it.”

“Well, she’s got the right idea,” Joel stood, having disassembled the first stool. “Sarah, why don’t you come work with me and Tommy this week and I’ll buy your ticket.”

“Really?” she asked with a hopeful smile before remembering her fathers line of work. “Wait—at the site? I won’t know what to do.”

“I’m sure we can find somethin’ for you to do.”

“Yeah, I mean…Britney’s worth it,” Sarah sighed and shrugged before walking back into the sunroom with Jessie in tow.

“Hey, did I tell you we got a new hire?” Joel spoke to you as he started on the second stool.

“Oh, that’s good. I thought you were having trouble finding someone?”

“We were, but she got the seal of approval from Tommy. Guess she’s a real jack-of-all-trades type’a builder. S’just what we needed.” You smiled at him proudly, his construction company having taken off this last year and a half. They were almost too busy, too booked, leaving Joel and Tommy to stay behind and work the amount of four people instead of two just so that their projects remained on time. “Hopefully might start gettin’ two days off a week instead of one.”

“That would be nice,” you hummed, walking over to him to slide your hand over his sweaty but irresistible back as he crouched down to unscrew some bolts from the legs of the stool. “I’ve been like a lonely little housewife these last few months. Holed up waiting for my man to come back from the coal mines.”

“Oh, is that right?” He looked up at you with a smirk. It had been a few weeks since the two of you had last been together, long days at the site and, for you, at school forcing you apart. Aside from a few steamy but quick makeouts, you were left longing for your soon-to-be husband. “I been neglectin’ you, huh?”

You nodded, your smile spreading wider as you played along, your voice dramatic and theatrical as you tried on an old-timey southern belle persona. “All I got is this baby I’m brewing to remember you by.”

Joel stood up and dropped his tools on the kitchen counter before letting his hands find your waist, tugging you as close to him as your belly would allow. He leaned in, pressing a featherlight kiss to your cheek that caused your entire body to light with chills as his kisses traveled down your neck.

“Why don’t I take you into the bedroom and give you that attention you’ve been needin’ so bad,” he rasped against your skin, dizzying your mind as you clung to him, breathless and wanting.

“House full of people,” Tommy’s voice sounded, reminding the two of you why you’d gone so long without each other in the first place. “Thought this would be done by now. Been, what, three years?”

“Don’t mind him, his longest relationship has been with the goddamn Longhorns,” Joel mumbled, keeping you hugged to his body. “Don’t know a thing about real love.”

“Yeah, yeah, save me the lecture, old man.” Tommy batted his brother’s teasing away and continued on packing and moving in the living room.

“Have I really been neglectin’ you, baby? All jokes aside,” Joel asked in a whisper pressed to your ear. You squeezed him closer and laid your head on his chest, Joel’s chin resting on top of it as he held you.

“No, I mean…I do miss you, and it has been a while since we last were together, but you’re not neglecting me. You still come home and hold me and talk to me and makeout with me,” you spoke softly, your voice a soothing hum against his chest. “We’re tired people, and especially now with the baby…I didn’t expect you to be clawing my clothes off when I look like a whale—“

“Excuse me?” he snapped, pulling your head from his chest so he could sternly look into your eyes. “None’a that. You’re beautiful…carryin’ our baby. Drives me fuckin’ wild seein’ you like this. M’sorry I haven’t been energized enough to show it, but I promise you, baby…you’re drivin’ me crazy walkin’ around like this.”

His hands slipped to squeeze the globes of your ass that had grown along with your belly and hips and, well, everything else.

“Tommy’s gonna see,” you scolded in a whisper as Joel’s fingers pinched the fabric of your dress until it started to lift, allowing his hands to rest against your skin and the cotton of your panties. Weaker and breathier, you exhaled, “Or the girls.”

“I promise no one’s gonna see,” he rasped, pressing his against your neck.

“Dad, come out here quick! There’s—oh my god! There’s a scorpion!” Sarah’s high-pitched squeal had Joel rushing out into the sunroom, his teasing long forgotten as he searched the room frantically. Sarah pointed in the corner and Joel spotted it, black and bigger than any scorpion he’d seen before.

“How the hell’d you get in here?” he muttered to the insect as he guided the girls inside the house before coming inside as well to grab a cup and the dust pan.

You stood in the frame of the sliding glass door, watching him as he carefully approached the scorpion as though he was Steve Irwin approaching a crocodile.

“They don’t jump, do they?” you asked, wincing as Joel started to make contact, guiding it towards the cup. The girls were behind you as though you were a shield, both of them letting out a squeal when the scorpion tried to strike Joel’s wrist, just barely missing. “Joel, just leave it! This can just be his house now, it’s not worth it.”

“Oh, hush,” Joel barked, keeping focused on the task before him. With either skill or luck, Joel managed to sweep the ground-hog sized scorpion into the glass cup and placed the dust pan over the mouth to keep him inside. “See, I got it.”

“Dad, don’t!” Sarah got gravely serious, sternly ordering her father to remain where he was with a point of her finger. Joel grinned and continued over, making both of the girls squeal and run off through the house.

“It’s so gross,” you cringed, leaning over to look at it through the glass with extreme caution and hesitancy.

“I don’t know,” Joel lifted it to his eye level to study it. “I think he’s kinda cool lookin’. Maybe we can keep ‘em as a pet.”

“Yeah, ri-IGHT—Joel!” you shrieked in terror as he pushed the glass towards you with a bark, making you jump backwards. Joel cackled as he watched you stand with your hand over your heart, your stern eyes watching him unamused. “That wasn’t funny.”

“I thought it was,” he chuckled. You watched him walk out to the backyard and set his new friend free, your heart still thumping in your chest. “Gotta get your heart rate up every now and then.”

“I don’t think you do.” Joel laughed and walked to hold you but was stopped by your hand pushing against his chest. “No, you don’t get to touch me. I almost pissed myself!”

Joel laughed again, proud of his prank. “God, it was good.”

“I’m glad you’re satisfied. I can promise you that’s the only satisfaction you’re gonna get for a while, pal.” Joel poured immediately, following you as you walked through the house out to the front yard where Tommy, Sarah, and Jessie laid out in the grass, staring up at the sky. “Everybody, we’re shunning Joel.”

“What?” he chuckled, looking at you with amusement and affection, so rarely seeing you worked up like this.

“Sure thing,” Tommy replied, mellow and relaxed as he looked at the clouds, a beer in his hand.

“Sounds good,” Jessie agreed before pointing at the sky. “That’s a dragon.”

“Yeah it is,” Sarah agreed. “And why are we shunning dad?”

“He threw the scorpion at me.” You knew you were exaggerating, your smirk growing as you watched Joel scoff at the claim, a look of amazement on the entire time.

“I did no such thing,” he defended. “I jumped it at her—“

“Oh, that’s right. He jumped it at me,” you repeated, still smirking at him. “A pregnant woman.”

“Oh, the pregnancy card again,” Joel playfully sighed, earning a gasp from you.

“Pregnancy card? How dare you?” you laughed. “I rest my case, Sarah.”

“Alright, yeah. Dad’s shunned.” Joel rolled his eyes at you before walking over, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind, his chin resting on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he sang, widening your already smitten grin. “I promise not to throw any more scorpions at ya. You forgive me now?”

“Mmhm,” you hummed, melting into him.

“I ain’t shunned?” he murmured, kissing your shoulder innocently.

“No, but the threat’s always there. As you just saw, I have the votes.” Joel chuckled against your skin.

“Trust me, I know my place.”

A Week Later

It was a Friday, you’d been stuck at the house all alone, Sarah off with her dad at the site to earn her Britney Spears ticket money. After doing a few hours of nesting, marrying your things to Joel’s around the house, you perked up at the sight of Joel’s name on the caller ID of your cell.

“Hi,” you sang with a smile.

“Hey baby,” he greeted. “Was wonderin’ if you could pick me and Sarah up in about a half hour?”

“Ooo, I get you home early tonight?” Your smile turned into a grin.

“Yeah, but Sean’s havin’ a barbecue at his place. Invited the whole crew so I guess we should show up.”

“Well, I’m in.”

“See you in a little?”

“Sounds good, baby.”

You smiled as you flipped your cell shut, but the task of dressing yourself quickly wiped your grin away.

You felt like a whale in everything these days, and despite Joel’s eagerness for you each and every day, you felt like a stranger to yourself. Even in the dresses you’d been living in, you felt every change in the way your body used to fill them out. You quickly shooed the insecurity from your mind and dressed yourself for comfort before heading out to go pick the Miller’s up.

Rolling into the construction site, you spotted Joel and Sarah standing in the dirt parking lot out in front of the project, a woman in front of them talking. You furrowed your brows as you got closer, seeing that whoever this woman was, she was pretty—the kind of pretty that makes you wonder why the hell she’s here in a construction lot instead of on billboards and magazine covers.

Your chest felt tight with insecurity as you pulled up to them, hoping with all your might that Joel didn’t try to introduce you to Construction-Barbie.

“Alright, Meg. See ya at the party.” Joel waved to her as he opened the backseat for Sarah, a friendly—too friendly—smile on his face when he hopped in the passenger seat. “Hey baby,” Joel leaned forward for a kiss but you were still too jealous to oblige, giving him your cheek instead. “You alright?”

“Yeah,” you lied, nodding as you pulled out of the lot, the rest of the drive silent besides the pop on the radio and Sarah's soft hums.

After giving the two of them time to change into nicer clothes, all three of you piled into the car again with Joel in the driver's seat. Sarah talked about her day at work, how cool it was to work with Meg, and how surprising it was that the newcomer managed to make her dad laugh. You tried not to picture the scene.

Joel stopped at a grocery store, running in quickly to grab some beer and a few bags of chips to bring to the party while you and Sarah remained in the car.

“Meg sounds great,” you spoke, unable to keep your jealousy to yourself.

“She’s alright,” Sarah replied, seemingly noticing your insecurity. “A little chatty.”

“Your dad didn’t seem to mind,” you mumbled, mostly to yourself.

“She was a little flirty,” Sarah replied. “But dad didn’t seem to notice.”

You tried to shake the jealousy, knowing that it was silly and hormone-driven. Joel loved you. But that didn’t mean that he still couldn’t find someone else attractive at the same time.

At the party, you kept mostly to yourself. You were introverted on a good day, but with this heavy insecurity weighing you down, you found yourself retreating inward while everyone else mingled and carried on.

You were inside the house of Joel’s lead plumber, his wife buzzing around the house as she tried to corral her five children under five. You sat in the living room, watching and praying yours didn’t come out like that—loud and disobedient and restless.

“So, how far along are you?” she asked, breathless as she gave up and sat down on the loveseat across from you.

“Six months,” you replied with a small but friendly smile. “Got any advice for me?”

She chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Besides not havin’ ‘em in the first place? I don’t know—sleep whenever you can. They’ll suck the life outta you if you let ‘em.”

“A little bleak, honey,” Sean, her husband, walked in through the patio door, Joel following behind him.

“It’s the truth,” she argued, giving him a passive aggressive sigh. “It ain’t easy. ‘Specially if there’s only one parent home to do it.”

“Alright,” he chuckled, trying to ease the tension.

You stood, ready to venture beyond the tension anf chaos of the house, even if it meant having to enter the crowded backyard.

“You comin’ out?” Joel asked, holding his hand out for you to take. You accepted it and let him walk you outside. “That was brutal in there.”

“Yeah,” you agreed. Joel’s eyes scanned you as you stood beside him, staring ahead.

“You sure you’re alright? Been awfully quiet,” he noted.

“Yeah, just…feeling a little off today,” you lied.

Spotting a familiar head of strawberry blonde curls snorting with laughter as she stood with Tommy and Sarah by the grill. They both looked comfortable around her, making your stomach curl with a new type of jealousy. She wanted your entire family.

“Joel!” she called once she caught you staring. “Come over here and join us, darlin’!”

You resented the petname. Turning to Joel, you watched as his cheeks flushed, his eyes flickering to yours.

“C’mon,” he looked to you fully, attempting to slide his hand across your back but you stopped him, swatting his arm away. “Baby,” he began, but you were already too worked up to be consoled. “She calls everybody that.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” you muttered.

“Baby, you ain’t really jealous, are you?” He chuckled. Wrong move. With a furrow in your brow, you reached your hands into his pockets and tugged out the keys to the car.

“I’m going home. Call me when you wanna be picked up from your date.”

Joel called after you only once, not wanting to make a scene by raising his voice or following you out.

Back at home, you stewed. What started as hormonal territorialism quickly snowballed into justified rage. She’d clearly met your eyes, seeing you standing there beside him, and ignored you. Then, she proceeded to flirt with him right in front of you. Joel did nothing about it except for defend her, which was what you were currently most angry about.

As you aggressively turned the pages of the book you were reading to distract yourself, you were surprised to see headlights through the window. Closing your book, you got up and peeled through the blinds to see Joel and Sarah stepping out of a taxi, your cheeks heating as guilt set in. You didn’t mean for Sarah to get involved in your fight with Joel.

Hurrying upstairs, you heard the front door open, the two of them speaking downstairs but it was too faint to make any sense. As you stood in the bathroom, hurting your clothes off so that you could jump in the shower, you felt more than heard Joel’s heavy footsteps up the staircase. Soon, after you stepped into the shower, Joel found his way into the bathroom, announcing himself in the doorway.

“We’re home.” His voice was gentle, but carried a sadness to it that made you feel less angry and more guilty.

“Okay,” you managed.

“Can I come in?” he asked, the question lingering in the air for a bit before you answered.

“Yeah,” you decided.

In the matter of a few seconds, Joel was stripped and stepping in behind you, his eyes locked on yours.

“I’m sorry,” he started, stepping closer to you and the stream of water. “I told her that pet-name stuff wasn’t cool with me, but I guess she ain’t as good at listenin’ as she is talkin’.”

“She’s pretty,” you replied, desperate to keep hold of this jealousy.

“Tommy thinks so,” Joel added.

“And you?” He shook his head and rested his hands on the swell of your stomach.

“I’m too busy thinkin’ about you,” he replied. “Thinkin’ ‘bout our family.”

“I know you love me, Joel. It’s not about that,” you sighed, moving to turn around but he stopped you before you could even flinch, forcing you to look at him when you continued. “I want you to think I’m…pretty like that. To want me.”

“You don’t think I want you?” He chuckled, shaking his head in utter disbelief. “For someone who ‘doesn’t want you’, I sure seem to paw at you every minute of every day.”

“I guess you’re right,” you chuckled, finally seeing the light beyond all the dark gray that this storm of jealousy and insecurity you were caught in. “Just seeing you with someone so pretty, who does what you do—“

“First off, she’s alright. She ain’t half as good as Tommy promised me was. M’pretty sure they’re fuckin’ and that’s why he recommended her.” You laughed. “Secondly, I need you to know that it doesn’t matter who I’m standin’ next to. I’m only ever thinkin’ about the next time I get to see you.”

“You’re good at this,” you smiled, reaching to hold his face in your hands. “Defusing the bomb that is a pregnant woman’s mind.”

“You know…I think that’s the first time I ever saw you jealous,” he hummed, leaning in to press a soft, teasing kiss on your lips.

“It happens a lot, I’m just usually good at hiding it,” you whispered back, stealing a few kisses for yourself. “Think you should prepare yourself for more of this crazy. Might be this way until the baby comes.”

“I like the crazy,” he smiled.

Five years later — December 25th, 2009

“Iris, watch out—“ Your five year old daughter ran full speed through the kitchen and living room, your two year old son, Miles, clumsily chasing her with his brand new stuffed dinosaur. It was hard to be mad at either of them, their giggles filling the room along with the crunch of the wrapping paper littering the carpet beneath their feet.

“Alright,” Joel scooped both of his children up and threw them over his shoulder, earning squeals and laughter as he walked them over to the couch you were sitting on. He plopped kids onto your lap but only Miles stayed. Joel sighed and sat down beside you as Iris got up again, a mischievous grin on her face as she stood before the three of you, all eyes on her. “Well,” Joel started, lifting his hands before dropping them back onto his lap. “We paid for a show. Are you gonna sing for us, Hannah Montana?”

“Daddy, where’s the phone?” Iris asked, making a fist and then tapping it to help illustrate what she wanted.

“The microphone? Somewhere in all this mess,” you replied, gesturing to the mountain of wrapping paper on the floor. “Gotta go fishing for it, baby.”

Iris quickly got to work, making an arguably bigger mess as she searched for her brand new toy, a microphone that was supposed to be its own speaker as well, but truthfully wasn’t much louder than Iris’s voice.

“Hey, hey!” Sarah walked in the front door with a smile, two large bags in her hands stuffed full of wrapped presents. When she took in the mess, she frowned. “Ah, did you guys already do gifts?”

“Iris already had them open before we even got downstairs,” Joel replied as he walked to the door to take the bags from his now twenty year-old’s hands before giving her a tight hug. “Martin come along?”

Martin was Sarah’s boyfriend of two years, the pair meeting in her biology class freshman year of college.

“Yeah, he’s getting the bags,” Sarah replied before coming over to hug you tight.

“How are you? How’s school?” You missed having Sarah at the house but were more than proud of her for getting into the pre-med program at Stanford.

“School is school, but it’s been way easier now that we aren’t living in the dorms anymore.”

“Sissy!” Iris rushed up to her sister and waved her new Hannah Montana microphone in her face. “Sing with me.”

“Oh…yay,” Sarah forced a smile but looked to you for help.

“How about we open the gifts sissy brought instead?” you proposed and your daughter instantly agreed.

“How was the drive?” Joel spoke to Martin as he helped him carry the bags upstairs to Sarah’s old bedroom.

“Not too bad. Sarah snored the entire way.”

“Sorry ‘bout that. Think she gets it from me.”

When Joel and Martin returned from the second floor, they immediately found their spots beside their partners, each of them making the same pained groan as they sat down.

“God,” you chuckled, looking to Sarah who was already looking at you. “They’re the same person.”

“Gross. Hate that.”

“You gonna pass out the gifts or what?” Joel asked, unamused by the comparison.

As Sarah and Martin sorted out the gifts, handing a few to Iris, a few to Miles, two to you and one to Joel. Joel shook his head at the box handed to him, but Sarah’s round eyes got her her way every single time.

“Told you no gifts for me,” Joel grumbled as he ripped the wrapping. “Don’t want you spendin’ your money—“

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” she smiled, sitting down beside her boyfriend. “I think you’ll like this one. It’s a gift for everybody, but I think you’re going to have the most fun with it.”

You watched him rather than opening your own gifts, the small black box in his hand opening to reveal a key. Joel looked up with boyish eyes, shocked and excited and near tears all at the same time.

“What is it?” you asked, plucking the key from his hand.

“This ain’t—how—what?” Joel spoke through his shock.

“What’s it a key to?” you asked again, chuckling at the tears welling up in your husband’s eyes.

“My parents used to own this beat up old ranch in San Antonio, but had to sell it off when Sarah was a kid. I always wanted to buy it back and fix it up, but I just…never got around to it,” Joel finally replied to your questioning, turning to you with wet eyes and a big smile before looking at his daughter and her boyfriend. “How did—“

“My dad’s a realtor and knew the guy who was selling it, so Sarah and I put our money together to buy it back,” Martin detailed.

“In your name, so don’t get too excited. Mortgage isn’t gonna be that bad because we got it at twenty thousand and we put down a decent down payment,” Sarah added. “So, just a few hundred a month.”

“Baby girl,” Joel shook his head and looked down at the key. “How much do I owe y’all—“

“Dad, you took care of me my whole life. You deserve this. Besides, I just signed with a publisher for my book, so—“

“What?” you practically squealed, Miles covering his ears as he sat in your lap. “Congrats, baby girl!”

“Thank you, thank you,” she smiled and bowed, bringing your eyes to the shining rock on her ring finger. Joel seemingly noticed it too because his clapping suddenly ceased.

“What’s that?” he asked, his eyes shifting to Martin’s nervous stare.

“Shit—we were gonna announce it at dinner so Uncle Tommy could be here too, but…” She looked to her boyfriend. “We’re engaged.”

“Oh my god,” you gasped, your hands lifting to your mouth to hide the joy in your smile. “I’m so happy. Oh my god!”

“That’s bad, mommy,” Iris scolded. You nodded but pointed at Sarah’s ring.

“I known, but sissy’s getting married, baby!”

“Dad?” Sarah spoke to her father who sat frozen in shock. You turned to him as well, studying him carefully for any signs of anger or disappointment, but instead found only pride and joy. “Please don’t be mad. Martin wanted to ask first but I told him that’s too old school—“

“Baby, I’m not mad,” he assured softly, shaking his head as his eyes welled with fresh tears. “I’m just so happy.”

“Oh, dad,” Sarah cooed, her own eyes shedding tears as she walked over to hug her father close as he stood up. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, baby girl. So much.” Joel squeezed her once more before letting her go and turning to her fiancé. “And you too by proxy.”

After a long afternoon spent beside Joel at the computer studying the state of the ranch from the pictures Martin pulled up from the realtor, it was decided that Joel would take weekends off of work—not that he usually worked them anymore, the business having taken off so much that it forced him into a more managerial role—and drive down to the ranch to work on it, the kids and you invited of course but he understood if you didn’t want to, after all, “It ain’t gonna be pretty for a while, baby”. You agreed to let him check it out in person first before coming along because it seemed a little too dangerous for the kids with the property’s long, unmowed yard and old, untouched cabin.

Dinnertime came and so did Tommy and his girlfriend of one year—who also happened to be your good friend and a successful attorney—Maria, the two of them walking into a cleaner home than the one Sarah and Martin were greeted with. She had a six year old son, Kevin, who loved to play with your babies every time he came over.

“No fuckin’ way,” Tommy held up Sarah’s left hand to stare at the ring. “You were just a snot-nosed kid a second ago.”

“Yep,” she giggled.

“Well,” Tommy dropped her hand and looked to Martin, giving him a handshake. “You know who you’re gonna answer to if you hurt her.”

“Alright,” Joel interjected as he returned to the kitchen table that the adults were sat at while the kids played in the living room, The Grinch on in the background to busy them even more. He set a bottle of beer down in front of each of you, but Marin was quick to slide her bottle away from her. “No? And I bought the good shit just to impress y’all.”

“It’s just…” She looked to Tommy for help, the younger Miller smirking as he turned to the table.

“We’re havin’ a baby,” he announced and the table roared with applause and cheers. Joel’s smile was the widest, the two brothers locking eyes. Joel lifted his beer up to toast to life and the rest of you gladly clinked your bottles together in agreement. To life, indeed.

March, 2010

“So,” Joel started, a proud but nervous grin on his face as you climbed out of the passenger seat of the car to get a good look at the ranch. “What d’ya think?”

The long, unmowed grass was now trimmed neatly, making the land look so much bigger. Joel had fixed the gate, but you noticed that when he pulled in; he made sure to have a sign placed at the entrance reading “Miller Ranch” to properly fulfill his lifelong dream. The old, rickety cabin was now renovated and converted into a private den in case Sarah and Martin ever wanted to come stay for a while. Beside it stood a brand new ranch house, modest in size compared to the surrounding ranches, but it was big enough to hold three bedrooms, two baths, a kitchen, and a living room. But the part you loved most was the wrap-around porch he built by hand, painted a soft, pale yellow to contrast to the white of the home.

“I think,” you started, a smile growing on your face. “I wanna live here now.”

“Yeah?” he chuckled and approached you at the passenger side door, pressing you against it. “Why don’t we go inside? Maybe…test it out.”

“Mm, might as well take advantage of Tommy and Maria watching the kids,” you replied, your lips ghosting over his.

Joel tugged you along by the hand up the gravel driveway, allowing you the time to admire the little details like the swing he built onto the big oak tree between the den and the house, or the sneak peek you caught of rose bushes in the backyard. With each detail, you fell more and more in love with the property, and what was once a joke now turned into a serious longing—you wanted to move here. Bad.

“Ready?” Joel asked as he opened the screen door and rested his hand on the doorknob of the main, wooden door painted that same, soft yellow. You nodded at him and he opened the house, letting you walk in first, he flipped on the lights behind you as he entered. You gasped at the living room, how spacious but cozy it felt with a fireplace built in, not that the San Antonio weather ever really called for it.

Turning to the other side, you saw the dining room that connected into the kitchen via a square archway. You started that way, admiring the hand-made dining table before walking into the kitchen of your dreams. You let out a moan at the size of it, the brand new appliances that were a surprise but don’t worry, they’re on a lease.

Back in the hall, you carried on, admiring the framed pictures he’d hung of your joined family over the years, the smiling image of Sarah’s mother and Mary and Paul and everyone you’d lost bringing tears to your eyes.

“This is gonna be Miles’ room,” Joel opened the door to a room set up for a kid rather than a toddler aside from the bed with safety rails on it. You smiled at the thought of your son growing up here.

“And this?” you reached for the door across the hall and opened it to find a bathroom, modest but new.

“Kids bath,” he replied. Guiding you to the room beside Miles’, Joel opened it and displayed a soft pink painted bedroom that Iris was going to absolutely adore. “For baby girl.”

“Which means this has to be our room, right?” you asked, reaching for the door across from your daughter's room. “Little close, no?”

“Mm-mm,” he shook his head and entered the room, shutting the door behind him. He made a lot of noise, or at least that’s what you assumed from his heavy feet jumping on the hardwood floors, but you couldn’t hear much of anything. When he emerged, he was breathless and smiling. “Hear anything?”

“Felt you jumping around, but no,” you grinned. “You soundproofed it?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Took me a while to get it right but…we can make all the noise we want now.”

“Well,” you began, sliding your hands up his chest as you batted your eyes at him. “Why don’t we give it a proper go?”

“Yeah,” he hummed, leaning down to kiss you teasingly, forcing you to seek more of his mouth in yours. “Come on,” he rasped, tugging you into the bedroom. “There’s one more surprise on the tour before I can get you naked. Go take a look in the bathroom.”

You did as you were told, leaving him by the bed to walk into the en-suite. You gasped at the clawfoot tub perched by a large bay window, looking out at the garden of flowers he’d planted.

“Joel…you—“ You shook your head, eyes now raining tears as you stood in the middle of the bathroom. Joel laughed and came over to hold you as you buried your face in his chest. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, baby,” he chuckled, amused by your reaction. “You like it, I take it?”

“Like it?” you lifted your head and shocked him with the amount of tears soaking your eyes. “I’m about to get down on my knees.”

“You can get down on your knees after I get my fill, how about that?” he husked against your cheek as he kissed your tears. “Go lay down on the bed, baby. Everything off.”

You didn’t waste any time in obeying, practically skipping out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Your shoes and jeans came off first, then your top, and finally your undergarments before you climbed onto the mattress to test it out. Joel walked in but remained patient at the foot of the bed as you laid in the center of the mattress, beckoning him closer with the curl of your finger. Joel grinned and peeled his t-shirt off before slowly, painfully slowly, undoing his belt and jeans.

“Roll over,” he commanded. “Wanna see somethin’.”

“I wonder, what ever could that be?” you joked, rolling onto your stomach and instinctively arching your ass into the air. Joel’s knees dipped the mattress as he crawled onto the bed behind you, his hands gripping the globes of your ass as he let out a groan.

“So pretty like this,” he hummed before surprising you with a broad lick up the seam of your cunt. “My country girl.”

“I’ll be whatever you want me to be, just don’t stop.” Joel laughed at your plea but obliged, licking you again. He kept at it, his tongue greedily and filthily lapping up every inch of you it could find before tensing and burying into your cunt while his fingers rubbed circles over your clit.

“Mm,” he hummed as he pulled away for a moment to speak. “There’s a gift for you in the nightstand. Why don’t you have a look?”

You chuckled hesitantly and crawled over the mattress to reach into the nightstand on your side of the bed, finding a long black box inside. You pulled it out and turned over to sit, facing Joel as he sat on his ankles at the foot of the bed. “Open it.”

“Is this—“ You silenced yourself by opening the box, your eyes taking in the sight of one of those wands you’d been desperately dropping hints about wanting to try out. “Oh, baby. You’ve got competition now.”

“Oh, do I?” he smirked, crawling to lay over you, forcing your head to rest back against the pillows. “That’s alright. Gettin’ too old to do all that work anyways. Might as well take all the help I can get.”

“You know you’ll always have one thing no one else has,” you purred, reaching to stroke his cock as it rested on your belly. “They couldn’t replicate this if they tried.”

“Mm,” he smiled against you. “You’re just flatterin’ me now.”

“Uh-uh,” you shook your head. “It’s perfect. The way you fill me up, the way it feels inside. I’ll never get enough.”

“Fuck, baby,” he whined against your jaw as he nibbled there. “Turn it on, wanna get you ready to take me. So damn hard for you, can’t even think.”

You flipped on the vibrator, gasping at the power behind it while Joel simply groaned.

“Go on,” he urged. “Press it to your clit, baby.”

“Fuck,” you hissed as you lowered it to your bundle of nerves, the whir of the vibrations making your thighs tense and jerk, but Joel’s hips stopped them from closing.

“Does it feel good?” he asked against your pulse as he kissed the skin there.

“Yes,” you panted. “But I want you.”

“Not ‘til you cum,” he replied, trailing his fingers down your belly, past the vibrator, and into your soaked entrance. You let out an animalistic moan, something primal and so unlike yourself. “God, baby,” he moaned against you as he curled his fingers up towards that dizzying spot inside. “You don’t make those noises for me. Maybe I do got competition.”

“Joel,” you whined, unsure of what to say or how to describe how good it felt to have him inside you along with this gift of an invention. “Please. Please.”

“Cum on my fingers,” he ordered, low and dark and right into your ear. “Then I’ll give you what you want.”

As if your body had simply been awaiting the order, you came immediately, squeezing him as you writhed beneath his weight, the vibrator turned off and tossed across the bed. Joel slid into you while you were still clenching around nothing, your breath getting knocked out of your lungs at the force of his thrusts inside. You felt like you transcended into some sinful sort of heaven, one where only you and Joel resided.

“God, baby,” he whined, his arms slid beneath the arch of your back to hug you tight as he pounded into you. “So fuckin’ wet. God, I need to cum. Been too long.”

“Those fuckin’ kids,” you managed a joke, earning a laugh before he found his rhythm again.

“Baby, fuck,” he warned, his voice as wrecked as yours as you screamed his name into the empty home, your nails scratching down his back as you begged him to let you cum again, as if he ever denied you. “Go on,” he urged, sitting up on his knees to watch his cock disappear into you only to come out covered in your shine. “Fuck, come on. Cum for me. Right fuckin’ now, baby.”

“Oh!” you screamed, again unlike yourself, and clawed at his arms for purchase as your orgasm hit so hard it might have been painful if it hadn’t felt so fucking good. “Joel, please, please, please. Cum inside me.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, his face scrunched up as he watched himself let go into your pussy, his eyes glued to where you were connected while pulsed inside of you with a deep growl. When he pulled out, he quickly lowered himself to the mattress and nestled between your thighs, fucking his spend back into you with his finger while his tongue swiped round and round over your clit until you were begging him to stop. “Too much?”

“For now,” you grinned. “How much longer do we have until we have to get back on the road?”

“I’d say a couple hours,” he replied, sated but a hint of mischief in his voice. “We could always try out that new bath.”

“God, I love you.” You pulled him up and kissed deeply. “So glad you showed up to that parent teacher conference.”

“Thank you for givin’ Sarah and I a family again,” he whispered. “I love you so much, baby. I—gonna get me all choked up. I love you.”

“I love you.”

•

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•

•

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[27goldensun]

Is it worth it? An analysis on Louis’ stunts

Lately there has been a shift in how Louis’ stunts are being presented to the fandom, with babygate mentions growing and seemingly being pushed by Louis himself.

I have taken some time to go over some (very arbitrary) success indicators that could possibly justify this push in stunts as a marketing ploy, however I have only confirmed my suspicions that the fanbase IS NOT HAPPY and that has been translating in Louis’ numbers.

(May I add that I focused more on louis’ relationship with his fanbase and I know that’s not everyone’s definition of success so I also added streaming numbers)

I took my numbers from this website and I looked through late 2021 and 2022 mostly

Starting off, lets look at Louis’ twitter following and activity:

Number of followers

Throughout August, September, October and November 2021, louis gained between 20k and 40k followers each month, those numbers were much higher during the earlier months of 2021, so what could have sparked that change?

The first picture of louis with F in years dropped in August, which happens to coincide with the sudden drop in Louis’ following

In December, the First Christmas BS happened, and that generated a drop in his following (he didn’t actually start losing followers until 2022, but he only gained 4K in December 2021) that would be weird on its on, but paired with the start of his tour (in which his numbers should be increasing much more) it was very obviously correlated.

Now onto 2022, which was quite an eventful year

2022 marked the start of LTWT which was not only an incredible time for preexisting fans could have been a great opportunity to increase his fanbase by giving him more visibility, especially paired up with a new album. We’ll see that this wasn’t the case

The beginning of the year presented Louis with a slow, especially if compared to 2021, but steady raise in following. This drastically changed in July.

The infamous dm leak happened on July 30th 2022 and it greatly impacted the fandom, which was translated into Louis social media following. Looking at it comparatively, in June 2022 he gained 129k followers, in July that number dropped to 26k, showing the impact of those final 2 days. In August, his numbers only continued to drop.

With the album announcement, one could’ve expect a raise in following and activity, but the opposite happened, and I can’t help but link it with the marketing strategy that was chosen, with further mentions of his “personal” life, especially bbg

The promotional interviews began July 2022 still during LTWT and, at first, they were stunt free (with the exception of one Interview on July 21 2022, in which he stumbled when saying F’s name, something he seemed much more comfortable with later on).

September 6, 2022: It is during an interview with Radio Deejay Itália that the mentions truly begin. Louis brings up Freddie unprompted and says he travels to LA often to visit him, from this point forward, the kid is often brought up.

November 2022 we get all those articles saying “louis finds parenting to be challenging”, over 100 copy and paste articles of this nature were posted.

December 2022 the Christmas Bs 2.0 took place, with the kid being flown to the UK and spending around a week there, between Christmas and New Years. The only footage of louis and F interacting was posted on Louis’ birthday, in a short video of the two in a dinner with the rest of the Tomlinsons.

How did this translate in his twitter following? When FITF promo started, Louis only lost followers

August 2022 he lost 7k

September 2022 he lost 33k

October 2022 he lost 24k

November 2022 he lost 29k followers (not good right after an album announcement)

December 2022 he lost 28k followers

January 2023 he lost 43.9k (the most so far)

But did all this only happen to his twitter following? Surely that’s not the only indicator of his success and relationship with his fanbase?

I agree, although louis does seem to use twitter the most when connecting with fans, lets look through his instagram

When FITF promo started, Louis only lost followers

August 2022 he lost 24k

September 2022 he lost 18k

October 2022 he lost 30k

November 2022 he lost 49k followers (not good right after an album announcement)

December 2022 he lost 33k followers

January 2023 he lost 62.8k (the most so far)

Looking at his streaming statistics

(I’m using walls as a comparison for timeline purposes, although im well aware walls promo was far from stunt free, it seems most fans have, understandably, a harder time dealing with bbg than Eleanor)

*Walls debuted at number nine on the US Billboard 200 with 39,000 album-equivalent units

*Faith in the Future debuted at number five on the Billboard 200 selling 43,000 album-equivalent units

So there was obviously an improvement on FITF debut, but has it been consistent since the album release?

The “this is Louis tomlinson playlist” on Spotify

May 2021 The "This Is Louis Tomlinson" playlist reached 250k likes

February 2023 The "This Is Louis Tomlinson" playlist reached 320k likes

Album stream milestones

Walls

Over 100 million streams on Spotify: February 6th, 1 week after its release

FITF

Over 100 million streams on Spotify: December 10th, 1 month after its release

So, overall, the situation does not seem to be improving…

I will later go through his tour sales, but given the different venue sizes this could be a bit tricky

My interpretation of those numbers i presented is that no, it is not worth it. Regardless on your opinion about bbg, from a marketing standpoint this image doesn’t seem to be doing Louis any favors…

(Please feel free to add your thoughts, I’d love to deepen this discussion)

Also, I don’t think any stunt that furthers a queer person’s closeting could ever be “worth it”, this was just my attempt to try to see what could be their motivations for this (although if its commercial success, it’s definitely not working)

[hellcat1324]

Fundraiser Masterlist

Latest Update 09/03/2024

Since there’s so many fundraisers that I try to reblog/share, this will be the masterlist for all of them just so ya’ll don’t have to bother going through BOTH my blogs to find them.

They’ve all been vetted either by me, Operation Olive Branch/Poppy Flower, or by others I trust.

I will declare LOW FUNDING if they are less than 1/4 through their goal

CLOSE TO COMPLETION will be to those who are 5-7k away from their goal.

HALF WAY is pretty self-explanatory, but I’ll also do it if it’s a little over half way.

DONE will be those who reached their goals

Vetted Family Escape GFMS:

Fidaa (mother of 2 small children under 3): @fidaa-family2 vetted by @90-ghost currently at $22.02K/$30K CLOSE TO COMPLETION

Ahed (family of 8): @ahedalshaer

Vetted by Butterfly Effect and on #407 on their campaign list. Multiple family members have health issues and such. Currently we are at €5.64K/€80K VERY LOW FUNDING

Alaa (family of 5): Alaa is who messaged me on Instagram, and he is followed by those who I have already vetted, so I trust he is real. He dreamt of being a football player before the war. Currently we are at €6.82K/€22.5K LOW FUNDING

Anas (family of 10, which is him, wife, 3 children, mom, his brother and sister, SIL, and nephew): Anas took out loans in order to get his family evacuated first due to their health risks, so he is now all alone in Gaza and in desperate need to reunite with his family. We are currently at $135.72K/175.7K

Lina (4, baby born safely in Egypt): We just need to get Lina’s husband out since she and son were evacuated out of Gaza before baby was born. Currently at €37.59K/€47K

Ibraheem (7 people in total, which is him, parents, older brother and sister, and 2 younger sisters, one of whom is still in highschool): $97.5/$94K DONE

Ibraheem has a NEW GFM, this one is for expenses for once he and his family get to Egypt to continue their education. As of now, he is at $7.54K/$25K LOW FUNDING

Madleen (4 people total, which is her, her husband, and 2 young children): As of now, they are at $54.38K/$70K HALF WAY

Deyaa and Family (him, his mother, 2 younger brothers, and sister): 15 year old Deyaa is the only member of his family who speaks English, so he is the one pleading for help evacuating his family from Gaza. On June 15th, he and his family reached their goal to evacuate and live their lives in Egypt COMPLETE

Fatma (4 people total, which is her, mom, brother and sister): we are currently at $21.14K/$40K. HALF WAY

Fadi (family of 11, which include Fadi’s 9-month old son): We are currently at $39.12K/$62.5K HALF WAY

Leen (5, which is Leen, her parents, and 2 brothers people total): the 17 year old daughter: Leen was the one who contacted me on Instagram. We are currently at $30.84K AUD/$50K AUD HALF-WAY

Lujayn (6 people total, Lyjayn, her husband, and their 4 children, one of whom needs medical care) Lujayn was the one who contacted me on Instagram, and they’re verified by Operation Olive Branch. We are currently at $95.57/$105K HALF WAY

Dr. Jehad-Zedan (5 people total, which is him, wife, and 3 young daughters): They’ve been safely evacuated to Cairo now (yay!) but they still need living expense money. So we are $34.14k/$40k CLOSE TO COMPLETION

Ashraf (Him only, his wife and family is already in Egypt): He suffers injuries from an Israel attack, so he needs the funds to travel to Egypt and get medical attention in a hospital. As of now, we are at £37.29K/50K HALF WAY

Maryam (4 people total, which is her, hubby, and 2 young children): As of now, they are at €52.34K/€80K. HALF WAY

Tala: As of now, she is at €27.44K/€30K CLOSE TO COMPLETION

Islam (Family of 9) : As of now, she’s only at €54.7K/€55K CLOSE TO COMPLETION

Haya (5 people total, her, parents, and 2 siblings: Mother has Lupus/kidney failure, so medical attention is REQUIRED. $62.96K/70K CLOSE TO COMPLETION

[allwaswell16]

A fic rec of One Direction accidental courting fics as requested in this ask. If you like the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!

—Harry/Louis—

✧ Misbehaving Honeys by thinlines / @thinlinez

(E, 28k, football) In which Omega Louis can't figure out why the alpha newbie on their footie team seems to hold a grudge against him.

✧ balance between you and me by beckywritesthings / @beckydoesthings

(T, 15k, coworkers) He's confident, though, that he doesn't need an omega, doesn't even have the skills to court one if he tried.

✧ Everywhere And Nowhere by @2tiedships2

(M, 15k, neighbors) Louis couldn't contain his look of disbelief directed at Liam. "He's courting me. Like some sort of romantic shit they'd do in the 1800s or something?"

✧ baby, you're the end of june by @disgruntledkittenface

(E, 13k, co-workers) In which Harry courts Louis. Entirely by accident.

✧ you give me feelings that i adore by @alwaysxlarrie

(T, 7k, uni) 5 times Louis scents Harry's things and the 1 time Harry returns the gesture.

✧ Court Wine by @enchantedlandcoffee , red_panda28 / @red-pandaaa

(T, 7k, friends to lovers) after a misunderstanding during a scrabble game, Alpha Louis starts courting Omega Harry without the latter being aware of it.

✧ young hearts on the chase by homemotif / @polaroidlouis

(G, 7k, uni) harry’s a hopeless romantic, louis’ oblivious, and it’s going to be Valentine’s Day.

✧ Almost Misheard by @tommokat

(T, 6k, friends to lovers) “You also said you were almost out of toothpaste but kept forgetting to get more. And I needed more floss so I was already over in that aisle.”

✧ I Want You to Linger by @insightfulinsomniac

(E, 6k, alpha nesting) A friends-to-lovers fic in which oblivious alpha Louis courts his best friend, nests with the gifts he gets him, and is faced with the reality that sometimes telling someone you love them doesn’t go to plan (but turns out better in the end anyway).

✧ Definition of Beauty by zanni_scaramouche / @zanniscaramouche

(M, 6k, high school) Louis’ caught off guard by an omega he nearly takes out with an errant footie ball. It’s not that Louis’ never seen Harry before, it’s that he can’t stop looking, and he’s desperate to figure him out.

✧ Nobunny Like You by pluckedcherries

(G, 5k, hybrid) Louis Tomlinson is a bunny hybrid. Louis Tomlinson is in love with Harry Styles. Harry Styles is a human. He is also, clueless.

—Rare Pairs—

✧ start again at your beginnings by PostitBandit

(M, 115k, Zayn/Liam) Liam has an unhappy past and just a few things that he holds dear. Zayn would like nothing more than to learn about that past and welcome Liam into his clan, and into his life, but Liam does not seem keen on sharing anything with Zayn.

[thewintersoldierdisaster]

all my svech fics are linked below with a word count and little summary. i’ll add to the list as fics get written. hope you all enjoy 🫶🏻

* indicates smut

love me tender love me sweet* (2.7k)

after andrei’s skate cut injury, you take care of him

i love you i love you i love you like never before* (3.8k)

you surprise andrei at a home game with your daughter in tow

miami vices* (7.6k)

all-star game 2023 is in miami and you join andrei for the weekend and bye-week

little rabbit (7.2k)

the birth of yours and andrei’s first child

at the heart of all my joy* (8.1k)

andrei’s 1000th game and celebration

around the sun with you* (1.8k)

yours and andrei’s birthdays are two days apart and you celebrate them

in that lavender haze* (9.1k)

yours and andrei’s wedding and greecian honeymoon

a sunday kind of love (3.4k)

mother’s day in the svechnikov house

hat tricks and treats (2.2k)

andrei surprises you and the girls after a game

delightful menace in the air (2.3k)

andrei watches the four kids alone for a few hours and you come home to delightful chaos

thank god for giving me you* (5.5k)

andrei can only keep a good attitude about missing the playoffs for so long

9 p.m. in vancouver (7k)

on a mini trip to vancouver to watch andrei play, you suffer the worst loss of your life. andrei is your rock throughout the ordeal

svyazat’ menya* (5.5k)

andrei ties you up and has his way with you

third sunday in june (4k)

it’s andrei’s first father’s day and you and evie celebrate him all day long

golden retriever boy (3k)

when he’s on the road, andrei never misses a facetime call with you and the kids

homecoming (1.7k)

andrei comes home late one night and finds his favorite sight on the couch

it’s cold outside but it’s warm in here* (3.9k)

christmas eve at the svechnikov house is a chaotic but fun affair

high speed* (4.9k)

date night with andrei gets raunchy when you decide to be exhibitionists

count down from ten (6.6k)

when you have a medical scare, it’s andrei’s turn to take care of you

little brother (6.4k)

it’s time for baby svechnikov number four to make their entrance into the world and of course it’s chaos in the best possible way

ante up* (5.7k)

during the canes bash, andrei steals you away for some private time

headcanons

andrei and mini-golfing

evie’s first day of school

spending an off-day with andrei

taking the kids on vacation

andrei and a size kink*

andrei and your nickname

pet names

andrei and sundress season*

andrei when you’re stressed out

andrei and cock warming**

the babies and their crosses

girl dad andrei

andrei giving you lingerie*

horny post-game andrei*

andrei all tied up**

andrei finding out about each pregnancy

andrei getting hurt during a game

mama svech as a grandma

protective andrei*

pre-game emoji tradition

boy dad andrei

svech babies + zodiac

tattoos for the svech babies

andrei and the first date

svech family and the barbie movie

dog dad andrei

andrei and public sex*

andrei and you in his jersey*

svechnikov family halloweens

andrei taking care of you when you’re sick

andrei when he realizes you’re the one

andrei on his birthday

andrei and a dick molding kit*

andrei when evie has a crush

svech babies as adults

andrei being protective in public

svechnikov family summer break