#and i don't see how either one could have a sequel that i'd enjoy at this point

[riddlerosehearts]

...did a frozen 3 and toy story 5 really, actually just get confirmed because uh. i’m sorry to say that i really do not want either of those :(

[remidyal]

So I'm going to start speculating a little about future D20 seasons, just because we're running out of JY and thinking about that makes me sad.

My guess is that we're getting another four side quests, plus the replays of the Time Quangle live shows, before whenever the next IH season is (probably jan or feb 2025). From Dropout's production schedule, most likely at least two, probably three, and maybe all four are either already filmed or filming presently. The strikes may have disrupted this somewhat, however.

We know the names of two from the 5th anniversary video; we also know from the JY FAQ for a fact that one of these two, called "Never Stop Blowing Up" is next.

In the last few years this has been the slot for a campaign not GMed by Brennan or Aabria; I'm going to actually guess that there's a decent chance Brennan also won't be a player though I'm not at all sure of the timing with paternity leave and all. What the season is from that title could be a lot of things, though social media stars or stuntpeople have been guesses I've enjoyed. I think this is going to be a new setting, rather than something set in a preexisting universe, but I could be wrong there and there's been speculation that it might be something Starstruck (in which case I WOULD expect Brennan at the table).

GM possibilities for this or any other season even just from among people who have played on D20 before are too widespread to even do a complete list; highlights who have played on but haven't GMed for D20 and who I understand have experience (and would be excited to see) include but certainly aren't limited to Jasper, Ify, and Anjali from various side quests. Among the IH, Siobhan has made it fairly clear that she's not interested in GMing. I don't know if Ally has experience or not but they would obviously run something wild and I'd be here for it. Lou I believe has DMed home games but not actual plays; I'm uncertain if he'd be interested in running for a show, but I'd certainly watch if he did. Emily and especially Murph have a ton of experience as well but I think NADDPOD is kind of too much for Murph at least to GM outside that. Zac is low-key the IH I think is the most likely to end up GMing a season; rotating heroes is a thing, of course, but I don't think the workload there is as high as NADDPOD's.

We also know a Dungeons and Drag Queens 2 is coming at some point. The most likely format for this is a straightforward sequel with Brennan GMing for either the same four players or four different Queens, but I would actually love to see one of the players from the prior run step into the GM seat if any of them have gotten deeply into the hobby in the meantime. If they swap Brennan out for another DM here, this would maybe be the one season where I'd be delighted for it to be Murph, simply for the makeup possibilities. (One possibility is simply that he wears Cody Walsh cosplay for the season.)

I also think (or maybe I'm just trying to speak into existence) that we will get another 10-episode Aabria-GMed season this year, probably as the lead-in right before the next IH season for the third time running. Burrow's End and ACoFaF are both out of this world, stellar seasons to me (MiMa is... complicated by how much I want the property it's mocking to fade from memory, but that isn't its fault or hers) and I want to see what she does next.

Last, probably between D&DQ2 and that 10-episode season if that happens, we'll probably have another 4-6 episode original. If Brennan DMs D&DQ2 and Never Stop Blowing Up, this will probably be someone else; otherwise, not much to go off of.

It's possible that the live shows end up filling in one of these slots and are treated as a season until themselves, but I think they're going to be released not all in a row but rather to fill weeks between seasons. This might just be a greedy hope on my part, though! I do hope Brennan sits out at least one season, and I'd love it if the person who GMs who isn't Aabria or Brennan is someone who's done less prominent projects. (I'm actually talking myself into really rooting for a Zac-GMed season, though Ify's been my main hope for a long while.)

One thing that does seem to have shifted lately, specifically in Dropout's marketing - in the past, they were always extremely secretive about seasons past the currently airing one until it was complete, with the names not even known until the release of the season trailers. This changed a little when they teased Matt Mercer gming a season (which turned out to be RavWar) during Never After's airing; it's changed much more in the last two seasons, with a teaser for Junior Year coming out before Burrow's End had even started airing and with the names of multiple seasons being given in advance. It wouldn't surprise me if we continue getting little seeds for future seasons as we move forward.

[sameschmidtdiffname]

feeling a bit weird asking this request since i haven't actually seen anyone write such a thing, but i'd like to ask for something about the parent figure!mike (NOT SMUT OFC), maybe something he's the reader's father or brother or something, if it's not something you could write just ignore !!! (i'm also not a native speaker so i apologize if it sounds impolite i always have this problem :/)

Girl have you read my fics?? Do NAWT come on here talking about feeling weird for a request when I have written shit that's sending me to super hell with Jensen Ackles or whoever played the angel guy from Supernatural. (I hope that joke made sense, I'm not in that fandom </3)

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this!! Fresh off the press for you pookie <3 (BTW, your English js great and you weren't demanding at all!! Seriously, don't feel bad 😊)

Same Shit, Different Schmidt

Dad! Mike & Gender Neutral! Reader

(This gif always sends me, I'm sorry)

Summery: You are a stubborn ass and Mike is not here to put up with that shit. Where'd you get this attitude, anyways? Is it so hard to just listen?

Tags: No use of Y/N, Reader is Mike's child, this is lowkey a sequel to 'What's One More?' but that is absolutely not required to read this, sickness, reader almost passes out, slight angst, Mike takes care of reader, Mike has a come to Jesus moment, mentions of arguing, injury, underage drinking, Abby and Mike go at it at one point, just a cute lil drabble :)

Notes: it feels illegal to post something so short. Is this allowed?? Anyways, this was so cute to write! Definitely a new approach. I hope you guys like this! Thanks for the request anon, I always love getting them 💗

▪︎◇{¤♧■♧¤}◇▪︎

"I'm fine," you groaned emphatically, trying to to rise from the bed, musty from your body's sweat during the night.

"You are not fine, do not bullshit me," Mike scolded. His hands pressed you back onto the bed, his scowl growing as he feels your temperature through your moist shirt. "When did this start?"

"I told mom my throat hurt last night and she gave me some ibuprofen. It's seriously just a cold," you said, trying one more time to rise from the bed.

"You always get a sore throat before you get sick, have since you were a kid. When did the fever start?" His hand feels freezing against your clammy forehead, making you shy away to avoid the chills that threaten you.

"Not hot."

"You want me to call your mom so you can gaslight her, too?" His tone is firm and threatening. "Is there something you're trying to get away with here or...?"

"I have tech tonight for my show, I can't miss," you finally admit. You open your mouth to continue, but Mike quickly cuts you off.

"No. Out of the question," he said.

"Dad, I'll get in trouble-"

"You will get everyone else sick and then what? I said no," he said firmly. But when he sees the way you sink into the bed, eyes sad and finally accepting the situation, he thinks of your mother acting in a similar manner or Abby when she was your age with the same attitude. It makes him relent, pressing his lips tight together. "What do you need me to do?" He asked, voice softer as he strokes your cheek. Your eyes brighten for a moment, a smile breaking out. "You're not going, I'm just asking what I could do to help."

You sink into the bed once more, crossing your arms.

"My director is gonna hate me," you mumble.

"I will deal with her, or she will deal with me. I promise you one's better than the other," he said. At that you crack a smile, finally looking at him.

"Mom's not gonna be pleased either," you said.

"Mom's not gonna let you go either," he said. "I'm getting the thermometer and then I'm moving you to the living room so I can watch you better. You get control of the TV as your consolation prize."

You twirl your finger in the air, rolling your eyes as emit a mocking 'yay,' glaring at him as he shoots the same glare down at you, walking out of the room and slipping his phone out of his pocket to call your mother.

"How upset are they?" She asked on the other side of the phone. He could hear the office chatter going on around her as he searched through the cabinets for the supplements they kept in stock.

"They're not thrilled. Not planning my death yet, but it's coming," Mike huffed. "Is it elderberry that helps with sore throats?"

"Elderberry makes it worse after you get sick, helps before. Don't give them that," she said. There's a slight pause before she adds "You realize this attitude is inherited?"

"Oh," he groaned, sucking on his teeth. "I wasn't gonna throw you under the bus like that."

"I helped raise Abby, do not pin this on me," she laughed.

"I don't deny sickness," Mike said.

"I can name five seperate instances where you did," she countered. Mike froze for a moment, trying to remember. "Just go easy on them. Remember you're dealing with your kid."

"And yours," he countered.

"Supposedly," she teased.

"I'm pretty sure that was you I knocked up."

"But are you sure?"

"Well, there was that one time with your mom."

She laughed. "Have them text me when they can. I'll deal with director, she knows me better."

"Thanks. She terrifies me. Kinda get why they don't wanna miss," Mike admitted. With a quick laugh and a quicker goodbye, Mike clicks off the call, slipping the phone back into his pocket. He gathered the vitamins in a small cup, grabbed the other needed items and made his way back to the room that used to house his little sister.

"Okay, Mom's dealing with director and is willing to grab dinner of your choice if you'll-" Mike trails off at the sight of your empty bed, worry prickling through and tainting the annoyance rising in his chest. He calls your name, turning to look for you before his ears tune in on the shower running in the bathroom. He sighs, placing the items on your bedside table and making his way to the living room. All is well until about ten minutes after the water shuts off, when he heard a small but sure 'thud' ring from the room.

"Honey?" He called. Nothing.

He rises from his chair, his mind trying to remind himself to stay calm and not jump to its automatic thoughts of harm and anxiety as he walked quickly to the door.

"If you don't answer I'm coming in," he warned. The quiet groan on the otherside is all he needed to quickly open the unlocked door, trying not to panic as he catches sight of you curled up on the floor with your head between your knees.

"I'm fine," you said quietly. "Got dizzy." Your clothes are thrown on haphazardly and it's clear how disoriented you are. Your hair doesn't even look properly washed.

Mike's arms are comforting, familiar and protective as he carefully lifts you up, taking you to the couch as though you weigh nothing to him. When his mind is racing like this, you may as well not.

"What were you thinking?" He asked in a panicked voice. "I told you you weren't going."

"My director hates me and tech is like, our biggest practice. I can't miss," you insisted, barely able to stand the light shining through the open windows. The couch is cool against your skin, the old leather offering relief. Mike had brought it home a few years back, a surprise he'd found at a thrift store with your help. Still pricey but a Christmas gift for everyone in the house. Your mother shook her head as she finally agreed maybe the couch that was as old as her needed to be replaced.

"Your mom is dealing with her and she's gonna deal with you next if you don't listen to either of us," Mike said. He ran back to your room, collecting the items and returning to your side before you could even respond. "Can you just let us take care of you?"

Oh. Oh. Fine, okay. There it is. He hears it now, that point your mother had just been making.

As the thermometer takes longer than he'd like to beep, he sighs at the sight of you looking like death on the couch. "You get this attitude from me," he finally sighed. You raise your brow quizzically, waiting for him to continue. A soft noise emits from the device. Mike takes it from your mouth and scowls at the number that flashes back at him. He hands you a now room temperature cup of throat coat tea with three ibuprofen to help with the fever before he takes your hand.

"Did I tell you about the time your mother had to drag me to the emergency room for stitches on my forehead?" He asked, smiling. You snort, taking another sip of your drink. "It happened when you were little. I don't even think you were two. Abby was going out with this idiot and figured out how to take out the screen in her window so she could sneak out without any of us knowing. This girl was bad news, I mean-"

"Aunt Abby?" You asked.

"What? No. No, the girl she was going out with, Lisa Browning. Had her come home with a belly button piercing once, I wasn't happy about that. Anyways, Abby decided that she was going to this party one night and I'd found her bed empty halfway through the night while I was going to check on you. Well, I decided I was gonna wait for her in her room with the lights off until she got home. So I sat in front of her window and eventually got tired, so I shut my eyes. Figured it couldn't hurt. Took a couple hours, but eventually your mother woke up and my side of the bed was empty and she heard this loud as fuck noise from your aunts room. This is like four in the morning, mind you," he said. "So she jumped out of bed and heard your aunt yelling, saw some guy in dark clothes on the floor, open window and the lights are off, and she's still wiping sleep out of her eyes."

"Oh no," you groaned.

"Oh yes. Grabbed some metal Eiffel Tower thing on Abby's desk and just swung at my head. Hurt like a bitch," he laughed, you joining in as much as you could without hurting your throat. "It was a good hit. I think she realized it was me when I grabbed her ankle and hollered her name cause she stopped right after that. Wasn't too bad, but I wouldn't stop bleeding."

"So did Abby get in trouble?" You asked.

"Are you kidding? I was even more pissed, I chased her down the hallway after her girlfriend climbed in and fell on top of me. I was ready to kill her. Your mother had to drag me and her into the car, go back and grab you and deal with us screaming at each other all the way to the hospital. Not that I wanted to go, I was fine with just pressing a dishcloth to the thing and carrying on with my plan to rip my sister a new one. She had to threaten us both to actually get me inside, and I only conceded because I was too dizzy to object by that point. I think the nurses assumed she was insane. I mean, kid on her hip, dressed in pajamas with some drunk teenager bickering with a guy bleeding from his head at the crack of dawn. I'm surprised no one called the cops. They did have to almost seperate Abby and I, though. Which just upset me more."

"How did they get you to calm down?" You asked.

"Your mother handed you to me while she walked Abby to a bathroom so she could take a go at her. And you were all upset anyways because I wasn't paying attention to you and you didn't understand why the nurses were fuckin' with me or why I was upset. Once I had you in my arms I refocused, calmed down a good bit. Someone brought me a book to read you and we got to focus on that while they prepped me for stitches," he said the last part softly. "I was so glad when Abby got out of her teen rebellion phase."

"She ruined mine," you joked.

"Yeah. She used pretty much every trick in the book, so we were ready for you. Sorry," he said.

"It's fine, I don't like parties."

"I don't either."

Mike's phone buzzed in his pocket. He checked it, typing a quick response before refocusing on you. "Your mother wants to know what you're thinking for dinner," he said.

"Chinese?" You asked.

"That comes from your mom's side," he smiled. "She'll be pleased."

¤▪︎{♧}▪︎¤

Short but sweet. This was a fun one :)

Taglist:

@jhutchissupercool @gh0u1ishly @joshhutchersons-slut @schmidtsbimbo @sugarevans @wompwompwomp57 . Thank you for your support! <3

Masterlist

[rottenzombrainz]

Lawrence x Reader (Dangerous Fellows fluff)

Beginning Notes;

sfw (as in non-sexual), murder, blood, GN Reader, yandere behavior, Reader doesn't mind the yan behavior that much (compared to the canon mc)

this fic will contain spoilers for the otome game Dangerous Fellows by Storytaco. inc!!! if you've never played it- this is your sign too! especially since the most recent update makes grinding for currency much easier!

this is also an indirect sequel to my first Lawrence x Reader fic!!

It was supposed to be another normal supply run. Another normal scavenge. But you had a run in with a crazed man who was convinced you were one of the undead. He would have killed you if it wasn't for Lawrence. Just when you had accepted your fate, Lawrence swooped in like a guardian angel and bludgeoned the man to death before he could hurt you. The others who came with you were mortified at his actions- but you...you were grateful.

The walk back to the school was a tense and quiet one. Especially with Lawrence still covered in the blood of the man he killed. Once you all made it back to the place you call "home", he asked you to stay with him a moment after the others went back to their rooms. It was just the two of you in the meeting room...

"Are you sure you're okay? You're not hurt at all?"

Lawrence questioned, voice laced with concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Really."

You flash him a reassuring smile. He smiles back, but it's clearly forced unlike his usual warm, alluring smile.

"I think the others are upset at you though... You should go and clear things up with them."

Lawrence's brow furrowed- looking almost offended at the mention of the others

"No. They just don't understand. I did what I had to do to protect you."

His voice was stern and serious. He looked terrifying with that expression whilst covered in blood. You sighed before walking closer towards him to wipe some of the blood off his face with your sleeve. He flinched slightly at your touch, but quickly relaxed.

"You should really clean up..."

You mumbled as you rubbed his cheek. Lawrence closed his eyes, blissfully enjoying the care you're giving him.

"I'm happy you're safe. That I protected you. I was scared."

"Scared?"

He opens his eyes and looks deep into yours.

"Yes, scared. I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you..."

You pull away a bit, searching his face for answers.

"You're very important to me. It's because of you that I've managed to survive this long."

You awkwardly laugh, not really sure how to respond to that. Surely he doesn't really mean that? He's only known you for a few weeks... right?

Suddenly, Lawrence grabs your wrist and squeezes it tightly.

"Stay with me, okay? I'll protect you and take care of you. I can give you anything you'd ever want as long as you promise that."

He looks at you like his life depends on your answer. Like what you say could make or break his world.

"I'll stay with you. I promise."

You respond, albeit hesitantly. Lawrence smiles brightly and yanks you towards him, enveloping you in a hug. It's a sudden gesture, but not an entirely unwelcomed one. You just wish the putrid smell of blood wasn't invading your nostrils.

"Thank you... thank you..."

He mumbled with gratitude as he gently rubbed your back.

"You should really change into something else... you're soaked in blood"

Lawrence just holds you tighter and burrows his face into the crook of your neck as if to say "let me hold you a little longer" . He mutters something, just barely audible.

"I think it's time..."

"Time? For what?"

You feel his lips curve into a smile against your neck.

"You'll see. It's a surprise I've been preparing for you. I've been working on it for a really long time~"

Lawrence's vagueness sends you a little on-edge. Surprises aren't usually a good thing in a world like this. But it could be something totally pleasant! Maybe a bracelet he made just for you, or those cookies he promised on the first day you patrolled together. Either way, your excitement outweighed your anxiety.

Lawrence finally pulled away from the hug and ruffled your hair a bit, smiling brightly. You look down at yourself and notice you're covered in blood too now.

"Ahahaha! Sorry, I didn't mean to get you dirty too!"

Lawrence laughed loudly- as if it was dirt or water that was all over you.

"It's fine. I'm due for a wardrobe change anyway-"

"Stay like that, just a little longer, okay? I'll get you clean clothes after the surprise."

He looked you up and down as if proud of the mess he's gotten onto you.

"You should go to your room and get some rest. I have a few more preparations to make before your surprise is ready."

Before you can respond, he gently grabs your arm and chauffeurs you out of the meeting room. He walks you to your room with a cheery aura that's become quite rare nowadays.

After he dropped you off at your door, you couldn't help but feel a pit of worry in your stomach as he left. "It's probably nothing" you told yourself, flopping onto your mattress. It wasn't very comfortable, but it was better than the floor. Your eyelids felt a little heavy- unsurprising after all the action you've had today. Before you knew it, you were asleep.

You didn't dream, you usually don't, but you felt a soft touch against your cheek that woke you up. Lawrence was crouched down beside you, caressing your cheek with his signature smile. Your heart felt warm and fluttery at the attention. You blinked a few times, confused if this was a dream or if he really was here.

"Everything's ready. Come with me."

He whispered, tucking your hair behind your ear. You begrudgingly sit yourself up and stretch.

"Mhh.... Couldn't you have waited until tomorrow to show me?"

Lawrence shook his head, smiling growing a little wider.

"No. I couldn't wait. I was too excited."

Lawrence helps you to your feet, gently holding your hands. He keeps his grasp on you as he guides you out of the room and into a familiar hallway. You've been here before- it was the way to the school basement. Lawrence told you and the others not to come down there- that it wasn't safe.

"Lawrence? What are-"

Suddenly, a thundering noise rings throughout the school. Lawrence pulls you close as you jump in fright.

"Lawrence?!? The school bell- it's gonna attract the zombies!! We need to get the other-"

"Shh... I'll keep you safe... and you'll stay here with me... you promised..."

"But the oth-"

"Don't worry about them. They're dead meat. I lead a few zombies towards the bedrooms."

You look up at him, completely baffled.

"What? You... lead zombies here?!"

Lawrence pulls you closer instead of answering. He gently runs his fingers through your hair as he rests his chin on your head. You begin to hear shrieks and screams from upstairs.

"Ahahaha... I finally have you all to myself. No more distractions. No more pests. It's just me and you now. The way it was supposed to be."

"Lawrence? Please... just tell me what's going on.... this isn't happening... this isn't real..."

You begin to feel tears welling up in your eyes as you tell yourself "this isn't real. this is a bad dream!"

"I have a confession to make..."

Lawrence begins as you tremble in his arms.

"I really like you. Alot. In fact, I love you. I want you to be happy. So please, stop crying. What'll make you feel better? Snacks? Clean clothes? Or maybe you want a kiss?"

You can't believe what you're hearing. You can't believe any of this.

"Oh, I think I understand! You're a little overwhelmed, aren't you? It'll be okay, I promise. I'll keep you safe. From the zombies, from other people, even from yourself. You don't have to worry about anything anymore!"

Lawrence brushes your hair out of your face and plants a soft kiss on your forehead. You try to speak - to say anything - but the words don't come out.

"I should go turn off the bell now. I really don't want to leave you though... I'm worried you'll try and leave me..."

"I-I won't... I'll stay.... p-please... don't hurt me..."

Lawrence scoffs.

"Hurt you? You think I want to hurt you? I'd rather die than hurt you. I told you I'll keep you safe."

He wipes a tear from your cheek and cusps the side of your face, looking deeply into your eyes with adoration. He leans in for a kiss but you can't bring yourself to pull back. His lips brush up against yours in a soothing manor. It's... nicer than you expected. Maybe it's because you've always had a bit of a crush on Lawrence? You should be happy, right? He feels the same....

"Ah... wow..."

He gazes at you lovingly before moving in for another. Your body begins to relax a bit, and your mind too, almost forgetting that he led a horde of zombies into the school to kill your friends. Maybe it's better if you forget? After all, he's absolutely perfect otherwise. Handsome, strong, smart, reliable, kind. He'll take good care of you if you let him. Before you know it, your trembling has stopped and your confiding in his embrace.

"I'm going to go deal with the bell now. I'll be back soon, I promise. I prepared a nice room for you- go rest up, okay?"

He spoke softly and affectionately, his love for you genuine and bountiful.

"O...okay"

Lawrence hesitantly lets you go and places a hand on your back, guiding you deeper into the basement. He stops at one of the doors and pulls out a key to unlock it. Behind the door is a neatly-kept makeshift bedroom. It has a real bed with cozy covers, cabinets and bookshelves, even a closet full of clothes.

"I hope you like it. It took a while to scavenge all this up. Originally, I was going to make this our bedroom, but I don't want you to feel overwhelmed. We can take things slow if, you want."

You step into the room and slowly spin around, taking in every detail. You look back at Lawrence, smiling. You're... smiling? And he's smiling back.

"I'll be back soon. Make yourself comfortable, my love."

You slowly nod as he closes the door. He locks it as well, but you don't mind. It's for your own safety, right? This is all for your safety...

Ending Notes;

woo hoo I'm finally done!!! I plan on making the next Lawrence fic a part of this timeline as well... so I guess it's a series? The next part is gonna be smut since that's what you freaks voted on!! (I was hoping it'd be the winner)

I hope I added enough warnings at the beginning... this is my first time writing a public yandere fic. And tbh I'm very proud of my work! This fic turned out super good! I can't believe that's what happens when you put time and effort into things!!!

I'll try and get the next part out soon for the rest of the Lawrence Lover Legion™ 😘

Thanks for reading!!! (⁠｡⁠･⁠ω⁠･⁠｡⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠♡

[justjams2003]

Between Two Gods: 1-Public Display

This is highly inspired by @oh-for-fic-sake's work which I have been binge reading recently on my second blog. Now, I am a firm believer that the MCU and DCEU should not mix. They don't belong together. But this idea just had me salivating and I'd do anything for good smut. If you'd like a prequel or sequel, I'd be happy to oblige. If there even are still people who read a/b/o fics, other than myself.

Pairing: Thor Odinson x reader x Clark Kent

Summary: While you and your mates are at the knot-friendly beach, you can't help but want to get frisky.

Warnings: threesome, mxm, fxm, mxfxm, p in v, semi-blowjob, a/b/o, knotting, meantions of heats and rutting, exhibitionism, voyeurism, public sex, mixing of universes, talk about pregnancy (but no actual pregnancy), afab reader, no mention of skin colour or weight. If there are any more please do tell.

Word count: 2,7k

You’re not sure how exactly you ended up in this situation. You’re the most envied woman on the planet. Gossip blogs, and news articles were all over you. The first mate of two in thousands of years. And not any two either, mated to the two strongest alphas on the planet, and beyond. Thor Odinson, the God of Thunder, prince of the nine realms. And Superman, the God amongst men.

Not everyone knew about Superman, everyone did know about Clark Kent. Mated to one of the most famous journalists and the God of Thunder? All to this young twenty-year-old girl. It was a shock to be sure and you can’t help but drink up every moment of it.

Even now, as you relax on the omega/alpha beach you can’t help but love every second of it. Thor, as usual, has gone off to make friends. His beautiful long blonde sand colour hair sways in the win as he jumps to slam the volleyball back up in the air. His stomach muscles strain and you can’t help but feel yourself get hot and heavy.

“You enjoying the view?” Clark asks with a smirk pulling you closer to his side. “I’m sure he can smell you from all the way over there.” You smirk, leaning into to him. “And you’re telling me you aren’t enjoying his preening too?” The man of steel chuckles.

“How can I not? I’ve got the prettiest omega in the world stuck to my side with another alpha who loves fucking her with me.” You smirk, pushing one of his legs between your own and grinding his knee against your slit, begging for some sort of friction. “Speaking of fucking...”

You can hear him groan and roll his eyes. You can’t help but smirk at his reaction and pull yourself closer to him. Slotting your nose against his neck, scenting his smile and Thor’s own mark on the man of steel. Licking and nipping at that very same sensitive spot. You can tell Clark is struggling with his own mind, his hand gripping tighter to your ass.

“Omega, you’re testing me...” he mutters, trying to keep his composure and tune out your mewling noises. Or the fact that these already small swim shorts get even smaller. Tighter and tighter every time that you lick and suck on those sensitive nerves of his.

“It's a knot-friendly beach, no one here would care. In fact, I’m pretty sure they’d even enjoy the show.” You whisper into his ear, making small circles on his chest and then trailing lower. “Yes, everyone else on the planet too. I’m not exactly keen on having my cock plastered on the daily planet.”

You groan out, then see Thor very well heard how frustrated you are and you’re sure smell it too. “Fine, I’ll ask Thor then.” You huff, going to stand and give him the best puppy eyes you could. You know very well he’d do it in a heartbeat. Public knotting isn’t just normal on Asgard but smiled upon. Even done to boost morale.

You remember how strange he found it. When you and Clark met him for the first time, seeking him out after the attack on New York, you had gone into immediate heat. Sending both the boy into a rut. Thor insisted on taking you there and then, but with much, much self-control from Kal, you three managed to make it back to you and Clark’s farmhouse.

Kal grabs you by your wrist, he knows if your go to Thor he’ll make a big spectacle of it. Everyone will be involved and invited to watch. If he does it perhaps it can happen more quietly. He grabs you by the back of your neck, he himself sitting more upright. He pulls you in close and whispers in your ear.

“You want to be fucked?” He asks, knowing the answer, he can smell the answer from you. You smirked, biting your lip and giving a curt nod. He also smirks and lays back down on his beach chair. He tilts his head to his growing cock and nods. You gasp out with a wide smile, “You mean it?” He smiles and nods again.

“This is a knot-friendly beach. Nothing done here should be new or even considered publish-worthy.” He shrugs, more so reasoning with himself than with you. He loves seeing his little omega so excited. You reach down his shorts and allow his massive cock to spring free from its imprisonment.

You can already see his bright blue irises turning an intoxicating black-blue colour. Like that in which the creepiest sea creatures drift in the fast ocean. A colour you and Thor both like to call sex-blue. Thor also had his very own variation of sex-blue.

The pre-cum leaks from his throbbing, red and sensitive tip. Like a kitten, you lap it up with your cute pink tongue. From the very top down to the base of his hairy abdomen. He watches your every move. Like a starving child, you lick every inch of him, wetting him with your own spit.

Then you move his legs in between your knees. You pull on the green bows tying your bikini bottom together. Clark's eyes consume every inch of you, watching the small cloth fall and reveal your mound. “See? I told you and Thor there is a good reason for me to wear these.” You giggle, rubbing your slit against his base.

“So, this was planned all along?” He grunts out, grabbing you by the hips and lining your body up with his. You can’t even reply before he spears you, filling you up from the inside. All that you can let out is a yelp and then a loud moan. He too throws his head back with a groan.

“I can’t ever get over how tight you are, perfectly moulded, huh?” He allows you to get comfortable. And then lifts you back up and down on his huge cock. You throw your head back, it was always such a new feeling to you. One you crave far more often than you cared to admit.

Thor’s senses were going crazy. He can smell the arousal from you and from Clark. He loves it and if he could bathe in the smell he would. In fact at home, he even tried to. Every chance he has, he gathers both of you in the nest you made and fucks the both of you silly. Then after he tries to soak up as much of the scent as he can.

And now he’s sure every other person here can smell it, but none are covered in it like he is. None can join anytime they want as he can. He just loves it. But Thor is smart, maybe not smart like Tony or Bruce. Yet he knows the game his other Alpha is getting at. He also knows what his Omega is getting at.

You want everyone to know and Clark rather keep you both all to himself. But that’s what the older Alpha is there for, to satisfy both of your needs. “My, my, my, what do we have here?” His voice is deep and low and your walls seem to clench tight at his deep dominant voice.

Thor notices instantly, he knows he has that effect on you both. Clark pulls you deeper into him. He barely even notices the other Alpha there, his own instincts flooding him with lust and nothing else. Privacy seems to be at the very back of his mind right now.

“Everyone can smell you two, all wet and sticky. Being fucked silly.” You let out a loud moan at his words and the God can’t help but chuckle. Then he attaches his lips to yours. Dominating your tongue and swallowing your moans. “You like that, huh? Do you like everyone watching you? Such a slut.”

He grabs you by your neck and whispers in your ear. His other hand cupping your tit through the neon green bikini. He twists and he pulls on your covered nipple. Lapping up your mouth. He loves the thrill of knowing that his words only make you bounce faster on Clark’s cock.

“You hear that, my pretty boy, she likes everyone seeing you fuck her silly. Fucking her so good.” Thor bends down low, whispering in Kal’s ear. Sticking his nose into his neck and pulling the scent from his mark. To everyone out there in Metropolis, Superman is the man.

He’s the one who gives orders and doesn’t take shit from the government. He’s the one in charge, saving lives and calling the shots. He’s the one strong enough to carry the weight on his shoulders. But at home, he plays an entirely different role. At home, he’s Thor’s pretty boy.

Clark comes home to an Omega, ready to be coddled and scented all over. To let his frustrations out. Someone who will gladly listen to him and sit when he asks and spreads when he asks. And then his own Alpha comes home. Coddles the both of them and tells him what a good job he did, taking care of their Omega.

Someone to praise and someone to praise him. The perfect dynamic, for you too. Easily filled and by the time your next heat comes around, you’ll be off the pills and pupped up before you know it. At least that is what both the boys are hoping for, they work hard every day to convince you of it... You’ve been a bit hesitant so far.

Though right now that’s far from where Clark’s focussed. Right now all he can think about is Thor buttering him up real good. “Look at that, she’s pulling you in with that delicious pussy of her’s” He forces his eyes open, forcing him to look, knowing it’ll bring him to the edge.

That it does, the man takes you by the hips and flips you over on your back. Fast enough that you only notice that he’s deeper inside you. Thor can help himself, he can’t help but reach down and rub your sensitive clit. Red and pulsing, begging for attention.

That’s enough to bring you over the edge, your legs shake and your walls clench around him. Clark can’t help but watch you pour out around him. Clenching and pulling all at the same time. This too pushes him further, he latches his lips onto yours.

The man of steel can feel himself growing bigger and bigger. He can feel himself forming around you. Pushing himself deeper, until he can feel himself right up close to your cervix. He is finally thrown overboard when Thor grabs him by the neck and gives him a sloppy deep kiss.

You can feel his hot seed pour into you. Like the first hot water to hit your back at the start of a shower. Overcoming and overbearing. Nothing else is there but the two Alphas. One deep inside you, pumping his hot seed into you and the other one throat deep into that same Alpha.

That is until the high begins to fall and you notice the crowd that had formed. Whispers going around, “Look at how big he is!” “How does that even fit?” “If I were her I’d be ripped open.” Clark can’t help but peacock at their shock. Pushing further into you as his hot cum fills you.

His knot is still big, even after the high has worn off. He’s not even sweaty or out of breath! You don’t know if you’ll ever be able to keep up with them. As your chest is heaving, your legs feel numb and shaky. You feel so full and pressed and pulled.

“It seems we’ve got a crowd.” You try to giggle but you’re still chasing after your breath. “Yes, even after I tried so hard to avoid it.” He groans, pushing out his last few pumps of cum before his knot finally calms down. Until he can finally pull out of you, drinking up the way that cum just pours out of you.

“Is this you avoiding a crowd?” You can’t help but chuckle at him. His hands are quick to swat at your ass. “Hey, little miss, this was your idea. Don’t get snippy with me.” He commands, pulling his soft dick back into his swim shorts.

Finally, Thor stands back up but your eyes grow wide. His shorts also have a massive tent, not to mention soaking wet with what you can smell as pre-cum. The God of Thunder knows good and well that Clark would like to get out of this without anyone knowing it's him.

This omega of theirs is bring out a much wilder side to him. Thor gives Clark another sloppy, wet kiss. “Go on, get us some drinks. Anyone asks or takes any photos you bring them to me, got it?” He nods, his cheeks red and flushed, from pride, embarrassment and excitement all bundled into one. "I’ll take care of them.”

And with that Clark gave you a kiss and was jumping to follow his orders. Thor stands in front of you, covering you with his body. His colossal cock is hard to miss. Seeming needy and ready for only one thing. His stature is huge, standing more than 5cm taller than their Superman.

The God of Thunder and the prince of the nine realms bares his teeth and growls at the people gawking. The same way he would when addressing his people. When commanding his military force, when charging into battle. It’s an Alpha command, one not even Kal-El can dismiss. Simple and clear. Leave and forget who you saw.

Not a single one disobeyed. They all drag their feet and most of the Alphas hang their head low. Each and every one of them baring their neck. He turns back to you, he sees you soaking all over again. “You like that, little omega? Does my little princess like me having to command all these people, all these Alphas, to stop gawking?”

He pulls you closer by your feet. Scenting his and Clark’s mark on your neck. Licking and sucking all the spots he knows so well. “To stop staring at this beautiful pussy. At what’s mine?” You bare your neck, knowing you’re going to get one hell of a punishment for manipulating Clark like that.

“Why don’t I throw you over my shoulder? Parade you around town, since you want everyone to look.” You gasp, he wouldn’t! He chuckles at your reaction. “I don’t think my pretty boy would like that very much and he’s not the one being punished here.” You bite your lip, he knows that you know what you did.

Just then Clark returns with the drinks. Thor smiles at him, tying the strings of your bikini back up again and picking you up. He places you down on your feet, “Go, clean yourself off while the Alpha’s talk, yeah?” He gives you a light smack on your bottom. You know defying will only worsen your situation. You jump and scurry off.

Thor smirks and pulls Clark into his lap. Grabbing the drink and taking a long sip. Superman can feel his Alpha’s dick on his back. Huge and heavy. He can feel him scenting his mark and growing even bigger. “So mean of that little one, huh? Using you like this...”

He trails off, pulling Clark just a bit closer and grinding into his ass. “I might just do the same. Just look at what you do to me...” Kal can’t help but moan and lean into Thor at the thought. His chuckle is dark and ruthless. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? I can feel it.”

Thor’s hands wander, groping Clark's wet and semi-hard cock. “It’s okay pretty boy, we won’t do that, not yet anyways. Considering that that little one needs a punishment. You can choose after all.” They both can help but grin at the thought, watching as your soaking body walks across the sand.

[nientedal]

Disclaimer: I'm speaking as a person who's only been in the Megamind fandom for almost 8 years, so I'm not, like, an OG 2010-2011 fan. HOWEVER... I find it interesting that from what I've been seeing, the people loudly complaining about the sequel content are mostly newer fans. People who've been fans for at least 6+ years are hyping this UP and being optimistic despite the flaws. I'm just like "u haven't been here that long, can we stop shitting all over it before it's even PREMIERED?? GOD"

It really is funny that the vast majority of people who are screaming like Dreamworks shot their dog are, yeah, people whose names I've never heard. Not on Tumblr, not on Twitter, not in AO3 or ffnet comments. Don't get me wrong, I've seen a couple of the old Livejournal crew who are unhappy, but even they haven't been spewing vitriol (that I've seen). For the most part, those of us who are actually active in this fandom are ecstatic! And it's not a length of time thing, either - there's new folks kicking around who are just as excited as the rest of us!

I'd say I hate to say it, but I'd be lying - the people who are the angriest about Megamind Rules are the people who wouldn't care if it existed or not in the first place. They're people who watched Megamind and enjoyed it, but didn't enjoy it enough to be excited for more unless it meets their personal standards. They didn't enjoy it enough to look for fanworks, they didn't enjoy it enough to say anything. I'll buy that they do care...but they don't care enough to try to see any joy in this.

They don't care enough to look anything up before sneering at the Doom Syndicate for being a "retcon" despite the massive amount of material out there supporting both the Doom Syndicate's existence and this plot (big "thank you" to some chucklefuck YouTuber in particular for that one). They don't care enough to stop and consider if there might be budget concerns for an IP Dreamworks was totally radio silence on for more than a decade. They don't care about who's writing it, or who's on the production or voice acting teams. They only care about jumping on the hate train, and I am FURIOUS about it, because I am scared to death that Dreamworks is gonna shitcan this before it even gets released. If that happens, I will be a level of angry that defies description. Because the people who did not fucking care one way or the other will have killed it, and the people who loved this story enough to be excited to see more will have nothing. Again. Newer people in this fandom who are bitching might not have the background to realize this, but if this is killed right out of the gate, THERE WILL BE. NOTHING. ELSE. When I say "radio silence" I mean Dreamworks all but refused to even LOOK at Megamind, for more than a decade.

That's not even getting into how much of a slap in the face it would be to the team who worked so hard on this. If anything could gut me hard enough to kill my desire to write anymore, it'd be that; I can't even imagine how the writers and voice actors and animators might feel in that event. I hope we never find out.

But yeah, uh, tldr: can we not fucking shit on something that literally has not even premiered, seriously. Can these joyless shitbirds PLEASE do something that sparks joy for them instead of shitting on something that sparks joy for others, goddamn. The animation looks fine, y'all are just mean.

[lovinggreeniehours]

what they won't know.

↳ takahara × lucifer (season 1)

↳ 700+ words. very short

↳ lowkey a sequel for let them look for they cannot see :) not exactly super official dialogue because this is a first draft from the arifer summary that i intend to incorporate later into the larger story. but yeah i decided to throw myself a pity bone. i can't infodump so ill post my silly little excerpt instead. excuse me if it isn't my best work i just like this scene a lot <3 <– has had the outline written down for 2 years ever since i first played the game

↳ extra warning for these two being unreliable narrators. as usual 😭

The chaos of the night eventually died down. The gold was returned, with mishaps along the way, and many more afterwards. Arion did his nightly rounds of checking on his siblings in their respective bedrooms. As he was returning to his own room, he then happened to run into the one person he least expected to see. Oddly enough, they seemed to find each other in the dark quite often.

"Good evening." Arion muttered. Just to be polite. "I'm heading to my room."

"Wait a moment."

Begrudgingly, he allowed it, biting back a sarcastic comment. Scowling, he looked up at Lucifer.

"What is it? I'm tired."

"I'm sorry."

What?

Arion tried not to let his surprise reach his face.

"For?"

But he couldn't help it— the little spark of vindictive glee that ignited in him as Lucifer forced himself to break eye contact. In an instant, all notions of tiredness seemed to evaporate. What? Can't meet me head on? Is this embarrassing you? Am I embarrassing you?

And realistically, Arion knew exactly what Lucifer was apologizing for. He simply couldn't help himself. He needed to hear him say it.

"..I shouldn't have dragged your sisters into our argument. They had nothing to do with the issue, and I overstepped. I may have been.. too harsh in my judgement earlier."

"Oh?"

"Shut up."

Arion really shouldn't have, but he laughed. For maybe the first time that night, for the worst possible reason. Arion had been crying his eyes out just a few hours ago, and the Avatar of Pride was apologizing. Why wouldn't he laugh? Why wouldn't he enjoy it?

Then Lucifer's next words hit him.

"I would like to form a truce."

The laughter died, allowing room for silence to pool thickly between them. Lucifer was forced to try and explain his point.

"Let us be clear. I still do not trust you. I don't trust you with my brothers, and I don't trust you in my house. But these are the cards that I've been dealt, and I'd prefer there be less issues such as this in the future."

Lucifer raised his hand as if in offering, before quickly realizing how awkward that was, and then letting it fall back to his side. Lucifer cleared his throat.

"Well? What say you?"

"We can agree on one thing, at least. I don't like being in your house either."

"Have you considered applying to change dormitories?"

Arion shook his head, almost laughing again. "I don't like being in your house. But my siblings seem to be quite happy there. Where I want to sleep is besides the point."

Then he put his hand forward, mirroring Lucifer's motion earlier. The hand he put forward was the very same that he broke during the dance. And he kept it there between them, waiting for Lucifer to shake it.

"Truce then."

For a moment, he only surveyed Arion's face, trying to gauge his emotions. His real emotions. From the bored droop of his eyelids, the unamused curve of his mouth, the determined set of his shoulders, and his hair so red Lucifer could see it in the near-lightless corridor.

He really wasn't afraid of him, Lucifer thought. How irritating. And yet, a sense of intrigue filled him. Now that the threat had subsided, it seemed Arion had no particular feeling towards him. Would he have reacted the same if he'd been threatened by another demon? By Lord Diavolo himself maybe?

"I still do not like you." Lucifer shook the human's hand, thinking bitterly. And he couldn't help but think of the irony in the gesture. Clasped hands were a common gesture between demons and humans. In pact-making— one of the few things they seemed to share (distasteful) sentiment in. "Whatever grievances we have with each other will be settled in confidence. I will not get involved in your family business so long as you stop sticking your nose into mine."

"Got it."

"So no one needs to know about this."

"Nope. No one."

"Good."

"No promises on not annoying you for life though."

"Do whatever you want. You'll be dead in a few years anyway."

Lord Diavolo finds them there not a moment later. Thankfully, there is a commotion in one of the rooms before he can question them too closely.

(The commotion turned out to be a pillow fight. And so Arion becomes the very first person to hit Lucifer in the face with a pillow.

Lucifer realized his mistake very quickly. He should have been keeping his eyes on Arion the whole time.)

[maybeimamuppet]

i'll be there for christmas III

hello everyone!! ahh i've missed you all so much i hope you've had a lovely day!! merry christmas to all of you who celebrate :)) sorry i didn't quite manage to post this on christmas. turns out making an entire christmas dinner and all the cookies/sweets for four people and trying to spend some time with family is a lot more time consuming than you would think!

anyway i've spent the last. eight straight hours (whoops) hammering this out as my christmas gift to you!! if you don't celebrate then i hope you enjoy anyway and you've had a wonderful december.

this was loosely requested by @ghosthooman who mostly just wanted to see janis pregnant for a change and tbh i did too!! so here's another little sequel chapter for ya. hope you all enjoy!!

tw for

pregnancy and c-section delivery (both as non-graphic as possible)

miscarriage

panic attacks

postpartum anxiety

and as always if i've missed something please let me know. it is 4am rn so it's. quite possible.

anyway!! enjoy!!

—————

"Janis?" Cady calls from the kitchen one day. Janis groans quietly to herself as she stands from their bed and pads down the long hallway and down the stairs.

"Yeah?"

"Are you busy?" her wife asks, looking up at her with a soft smile. Janis returns it and pulls a chair out from the table to sit on.

"Nope," she says. "What's up?"

"We need to have a... um... a conversation," Cady says hesitantly. Janis quirks an eyebrow.

"Are you making me sign another NDA?" she asks. Cady immediately says no, but in such a way that has Janis wondering if she really means it. Cady does have a lot of papers in front of her.

"There'll be no more of those if I can help it. But... we've been married for five years now. My mother has been pressuring me about this for three of them and I can't take it any longer."

"What is it?" Janis asks, reaching a hand across the table to hold Cady's fidgety ones. Cady looks at her with a relieved smile and places her hand in hers.

"My... my family wants to know when we'll have children," she says softly. Janis blinks.

"Children?"

"It's always been the expectation, and I know you said you wanted them previously but I wasn't sure if you still do, and I haven't known what to say but my mother just will not let the topic rest, and I-"

"Cady," Janis interrupts, squeezing her hand with a chuckle. "Breathe. Yeah. I... I still want kids. Especially with you."

"You do?" Cady asks, blinking at her with those huge blue eyes. Janis nods.

"Of course I do," she says. "Do you?"

"Yes," Cady says quietly. "I do."

"Then what's the problem?" Janis asks, scooting her chair closer.

"We're both women, baby, there are some logistical things to figure out," Cady explains with a chuckle.

"I'm not getting pregnant," Janis says immediately. "Ever. You can do anything you want to me except that."

Cady nods. "That's the problem. I... I finally have the job I've dreamed of since I was a child. I've spent my entire life working for this. And as much as I want children, I... I'm not ready to get pregnant and lose that. I'd have to take a leave when they're born, and there's so much that might go wrong that would take me away for even longer. I'm fine taking a long time off if it means getting to spend time with our baby, but... I'm worried about the long term effects carrying a child might have on me. And how they'd affect my ability to work."

"I know," Janis says. "I completely understand. I don't want that for you either."

"Then... what do we do?"

"We could adopt?" Janis proposes.

"Adopt?" Cady asks.

"Babies are exhausting anyway," Janis says. "We could see about getting a kid that's a little older. Someone who really needs a home."

"That sounds lovely," Cady says. "My mother won't be happy."

"Oh my god, is she ever?" Janis says with a bit of a huff. Cady laughs and kisses the corner of her lips.

"You hush, she's gotten much better," she chides.

"I know," Janis chuckles, winding her arms around Cady's neck and kissing her. Cady wraps her arms around her waist and smiles up at her. "We'll figure it out. I'm sure once she meets the kid she'll be fine with it."

"We'll figure it out," Cady echoes.

—-

Unfortunately, there are some things nobody can figure out. They tried for nearly two years, but every foster agency rejected their applications. Every foreign orphanage did too. All of them said the same thing. It wouldn't be fair to allow one child to live in such splendor for a while and then take them back, or while the rest of them are adopted out to normal families. They tried and tried and tried again, but they were shunned at every turn.

"We got rejected again," Cady sighs, plopping on their bed as she hangs up the phone. Janis puts her book down and reaches for her. Cady lies on her stomach with a huff. Janis chuckles and strokes through Cady's auburn hair.

"I think it might be time to call it, Cads," she admits. "I hate to say it, but it's been years and we haven't gotten anywhere."

"Who'd have ever thought you could be too rich to adopt a child?" Cady grumbles.

"I get where they're coming from," Janis says. Cady nods.

"I know. I do too," she says. "...But I really wanted a child."

"I do too," Janis says. "Maybe... maybe it's time to revisit some things."

Cady leans up on her elbows and looks at her with a puzzled expression. "What do you mean?"

"We both want kids," Janis begins, almost not believing the words coming out of her mouth. "Your mom won't get off our backs until we have them anyway. So... why... why don't we just do it?"

"You mean..."

"Let's knock one of us up," Janis shrugs.

"Janis, I still don't want to-"

"Then we'll knock me up," Janis says. Cady gawks at her.

"What? But you said you never-"

"I know," Janis replies, pulling Cady closer. "But... I've been thinking, and it... it kind of sounds like it might not be so bad. Once. I can take nine months of hell if it means a lifetime raising a little munchkin with you."

"Really?" Cady asks with tears brimming in her eyes. "You'd do that?"

"Yeah," Janis nods, stroking Cady's cheek with her thumb. "We're talking about it first. But think about it. We could have a little baby. With your eyes and your smile, and my hair. And my height."

"Hey!" Cady says indignantly. Janis laughs, and Cady eventually does too. They're quiet for a moment before Cady whispers, "A baby."

"And maybe someday things will be different and we can still adopt. But for now... let's... let's have a baby," Janis says. Cady cups her face between her hands and stares into her eyes.

"Let's have a baby."

—————

"I'm home!" Cady calls the next day as she enters from work. She kicks off her shoes and heads down the hall to the living room where Janis is waiting with a series of documents spread on the coffee table and a pen in her hand. Cady freezes in her tracks.

"My turn to make contracts," Janis says with a smirk. Cady hesitates before she sits down. "Miss Heron."

"Miss Heron," Cady echoes with a smile. "What can I do for you?"

"I have some terms. I think we should get them all... on the table, so to speak. And you can bring up anything you have to. I just don't want us arguing or worrying over anything once we've already gone through with everything."

"Good plan," Cady nods, reaching for the documents to read over. They all turn out to be blank, but Janis pulls out a notepad and writes RULES FOR BABBY in capital letters on the top. "What are your terms, Madam?"

"To clarify. I'm getting pregnant," Janis begins. Cady nods, so Janis writes that down. "I am only getting pregnant once. I want a kid with you, and I'm more than willing to do this so we can get there. But I am not doing it more than once."

"That's fine," Cady says. "I think one baby is plenty for us anyway."

Janis writes that down too. "Since I'm carrying them, I get to accept or refuse any procedures I want."

"Like what?" Cady asks.

"Like if I'm feeling really really sick and I think the gestational diabetes test is gonna make me hurl I get to say no or reschedule it if I want to," Janis explains. Cady nods.

"If you're carrying it I suppose that's only fair. But I get an override if we have medical evidence that either you or the baby are in danger," she insists. Janis considers this point and nods.

"Fair enough. Point three, the baby will be vaccinated on the normal schedule once they're born." she says.

"Obviously," Cady responds. "What else?"

"We both have equal say in picking a pediatrician, but if either of us find anything, the smallest thing, that we don't like about them, we're out of there no questions asked and we find someone else."

"Okay," Cady says.

"Names are a two yes thing only. If one of us doesn't like it the kid doesn't get it," Janis continues. Cady nods. "I don't want to find out the sex until they're born."

"No parties?" Cady pouts. Janis shakes her head vehemently.

"No parties."

"We can't even find out just for us?" Cady asks.

"You know your mom is gonna find worm it out of us if we know," Janis says. "I love her, but the idea of being pregnant around her is exhausting enough without her trying to suggest names and buying an entire nursery for them and everything."

"No, you're right," Cady agrees. "Surprise it is, then. What else?"

Janis adds it to the list. "Um... do you have anything?"

"Uh..." Cady hums. "I want it in writing that I get to come to all of your appointments unless you don't want me there for some reason. And... I don't want to use my eggs."

"You don't?" Janis asks in shock, putting her pen down. Cady looks at her lap and shakes her head. "Hey. Time out, come here. Why... why don't you want to use yours?"

Cady moves to sit next to her wife on the couch and leans into her side with a sniffle. "My... I... I just can't, Jay."

"Why?" Janis asks gently as Cady starts to cry. Janis pulls her closer and squishes her cheek against Cady's head.

"I... I love my family," Cady says hoarsely around a thick lump in her throat. "But-but they have done some-some despicable things in the name of money. That-that's in my blood, Janis. I-I-I don't want to... to pass that down."

"Oh, baby," Janis says as Cady dissolves into sobs against her shoulder.

One of Cady's first orders of business when she became co-CEO of Heron Enterprises with her father was completely revamping their ethics. It's been a slow, and expensive, process, but seeing how Janis was treated gave Cady enough ammunition to be able to talk the board into at least paying their employees a living wage, which is a good first step.

"They have, but you haven't," Janis says. "You've done the opposite, if anything. Even after being raised by your father, you've changed everything. You've basically changed the way the world works, baby. That's in your blood too. That's in you. Just because we use your eggs doesn't mean I'm gonna pop out the next Elon Musk."

"Do not mention that name in this house," Cady growls, wiping her nose with a sniffle. Janis laughs and wipes her tears for her.

"Noted. Should I add that to the list?" she hums. That gets a laugh from her wife.

"Maybe," she hums haughtily. "You... you really want to use mine? You're not worried?"

"Not in the slightest," Janis replies quietly. "Having my own kid would be boring anyway."

Cady laughs again. "I... I guess so."

"I know so," Janis says. "Anything else you want to add?"

"We're both taking off of work two months before and after you're due, at least. I do all the actual work on the nursery, but you can help pick designs and things. No visitors in person for the first month, and we avoid sharing their face in the media as much as we can."

"All good," Janis nods, adding them to the list.

"And no horseback riding lessons when they're old enough for them unless they absolutely beg for them."

"Um... okay," Janis chuckles, knowing her wife's horse phobia still runs deep. Cady hugs her left arm as Janis continues writing.

"Do you have anything else?" she asks. She feels Janis tense beneath her, and she frowns. "What?"

"I want a home birth."

"Absolutely not," Cady says immediately.

"I knew you'd say that," Janis sighs.

"Of course I would! Janis, do you have any idea the number of things that can go wrong during childbirth? Hemorrhaging and-and you could bleed out, you-you-you could die, Jay! And the baby, what if the cord is around their neck, or-or they get stuck? And you could tear, or get hurt otherwise, and we might not be able to get you to the hospital in time-"

"Hey," Janis interrupts. "Stop catastrophizing before I even have the kid in me, hm?"

"Janis, it's so dangerous! I won't allow it," Cady insists.

"It's not any more dangerous than it would be in a hospital," Janis says gently, squeezing Cady's hand. "I'm healthy and... a good size. If we go through with this, the chances of anything going wrong are incredibly slim. I know they're there," Janis continues, cutting Cady off as she was about to interrupt. Cady deflates back against her side with a small huff. "Unless the pregnancy turns out to be high risk for whatever reason, I want it to be here."

"But why?" Cady pleads desperately.

"Because I am going to be in an incredible amount of pain and discomfort no matter what we do, and I don't want to be somewhere I've never been before that smells like disinfectant and bodily fluids while I pop a whole kid out of my body. I trust my body to know what it needs, and I trust you to keep me and the baby safe during it. I want to be able to choose what happens during the process. I want you to be able to be involved as much as you want. We won't get that in a hospital."

Cady is quiet for a long time. "I just don't want you to be in pain."

"I'll still be in pain in a hospital," Janis responds quietly, resting her head against Cady's. "But it's worth it."

Cady cuddles a little bit closer. "We'll do what you want."

"Thank you."

"But," Cady says, and Janis sighs. "If... if it comes down to it, heaven forbid. I'm... I'm picking you over the baby."

"If we ever get there, I trust you to make whatever decisions need to be made," Janis responds just as quietly. "I'll make plans for everything I can. And if it's a situation like that I'll never hold anything you choose to do against you."

Cady nods with a sniffle. "I'm sorry. This should be happy."

"It should be important, and it is," Janis says. "We... we're doing the right thing."

Cady nods. "For us."

"For us," Janis echoes. She tears the list of rules off her notepad and hands it to Cady. "Can you... make this legal, however the hell you do that?"

"'Rules for babby' as the title and all?" Cady says with a watery giggle.

"I'll settle for nothing less," Janis insists. Cady rolls her eyes lovingly and rests her head on Janis' lap.

"You're strange."

"So are you," Janis echoes, gently tapping the tip of her nose. "And we'll have a strange little munchkin before too long."

"Hopefully," Cady sighs.

"We will," Janis insists again. Cady smiles wistfully.

A strange little munchkin.

—————

Cady absolutely insists on hunting down a decent sperm donor for them. Janis would've been perfectly content with an anonymous one so long as they didn't have any genetic conditions, but with everything else going on, she decided this was not the hill to die on.

Cady returned after about six months with one that had as clean a bill of health they could hope for, similar ancestral roots to Janis, and dark hair and eyes almost the same shade as hers. Janis just blinked when she was confronted with all the information and nodded.

Then came time to retrieve Cady's eggs. Janis decided spontaneously that she had changed her mind several times over, watching her poor, needle-phobic wife cry anxiously before her daily shots. Hormones, then the release, and the actual retrieval process itself isn't painless either.

"It'll be worse for you, and you said you'd do it," Cady always sniffled after the rounds were done for the day. "I can handle this."

Before long, they had everything they needed, and it was time.

—-

"You lot have some strong genes," the doctor says as a greeting. "You have seven impressive quality embryos and more that aren't quite so strong. Your chances of a healthy little one are much higher than most we see in here."

Cady smiles down at Janis and squeezes her hand. Janis squeezes back. "We're not putting seven in."

"No, no, heavens no," the doctor laughs immediately. She washes her hands and rolls over a stool to sit on while they talk. "I wouldn't recommend more than three at the absolute most."

"How many do you recommend?" Cady asks.

"For you in particular I would say two. Without wanting to dumb things down, that... doubles your chances of successful implantation. Of course, one alone could also always implant too. I'd just prefer not to see you back so soon if we can help it. And you're strong and healthy, your body can handle two embryos at once until they sort themselves out."

"Two," Janis says. "And what if both... both stick?"

"Then you have twins, and we can discuss what you'd like to do should that happen," the doctor says with a small shrug of her shoulders. "But again, that could also happen with one. Just a matter of fraternal versus identical. Your chances of twins with two embryos aren't all that much higher."

Cady and Janis look anxiously at each other. Twins was a bit more than they bargained for, but... they both have always wanted at least two. And like the doctor says, the chances are low.

"It's up to you, my love," Cady says quietly. Janis has been staring silently at the ceiling since she asked her question, mulling over the realities that are setting in now.

"Do two," she says with a strange lump in her throat, after about five minutes of pure silence.

"Are you sure?" Cady asks. "There's no going back from here."

Janis squeezes her hand and nods. "I'm sure."

The doctor nods and the clinic prepares two embryos. They're implanted a week later.

"And you are now pregnant until proven otherwise, congratulations," the doctor says. Cady tackles her wife in a hug as soon as it's safe to.

"I love you," she says softly.

"I love you too," Janis responds.

—————

It's an anxious few weeks from there. Janis goes from delighted to terrified roughly every thirty seconds, and Cady isn't faring much better.

"What if it didn't work?" she asks anxiously, pacing around their bedroom in the middle of the night. "Or what if it went wrong and damaged your uterus? Or-"

"Caddy," Janis grumbles sleepily from bed. "It's gonna be fine."

"You don't know that! What if you have to get more implanted? You looked so uncomfortable," Cady hums, wringing her hands in front of her.

"I'm gonna be uncomfortable either way. If we lose these then... we'll take some time to process and go from there," Janis says.

"But-"

"Baby," Janis sighs, sitting up and turning on the light. Cady pauses and squints a little bit as she looks at her wife. "Breathe, please. You're stressing me out."

"Sorry," Cady whispers, taking a few deep breaths. "I'm... I'm just worried."

"No shit?" Janis asks with a chuckle. Cady rolls her eyes in her general direction and starts pacing again, albeit much slower. "It's gonna be okay."

"But what if it isn't? What if- what if we're making some terrible mistake? What if we're not ready?"

"Baby, you're just... you... this is just what happened on our wedding day, okay? Even though it was what we both wanted and we knew it would all turn out, we both had cold feet until we were at the end of that aisle holding hands. I'm sure we'll have a few learning curves and whatnot. But... I'm really excited, too."

Cady pauses and looks at her again. She gives Janis a smile warm enough to melt her heart. "I am too."

Janis smiles back. "Yeah?"

Cady nods. "Yeah."

"Come to bed," Janis says, beckoning her over with outstretched arms. Cady sinks into them willingly and nuzzles in close. Janis flips the light back off. They lie together peacefully in the dark for a long, long time.

Janis thinks Cady's finally gone to sleep until she feels her inhale a little bit more heavily and Cady quietly asks, "You're not scared?"

"Are you kidding? Of course I am. I'm fucking terrified," Janis chuckles. "But I'm... not alone."

Cady leans up a little bit and grabs Janis' face between her hands. They have to get quite close to be able to see each other, but she leans in close enough that Janis can see a few vague details of her face in the darkness. "Never. You're never gonna be alone."

Janis smiles and rests a hand over Cady's. "Neither are you."

————-

It's an agonizing wait to find out whether their embryos stuck. It's barely two weeks, but they still don't even make it that long. Cady got so wound up that Janis ended up doing a few tests just to assuage her, but Cady was also too anxious to even look at them. Janis sighed and tucked them away without checking them for the doctors to see the hormone progression.

But, two weeks finally comes, and their tests are almost sure to be accurate at this point. They're both somehow more nervous this time. It feels much more official, even though they're just hanging out in the restroom together while the test sits waiting on the counter.

The timer goes off, and Janis and Cady lock eyes.

"You ready?" Cady asks, taking Janis' hand. Janis takes a deep breath and grabs the test with her free hand. Cady leans into her side, pressing against her arm so she can see the results too.

"It's positive," Janis whispers, biting her lip as delighted tears flow down her face.

"Pos- oh my god!" Cady squeals. She pitches herself at her wife and grabs her face, kissing all over it. Janis laughs and gently grabs Cady's waist to pull her back. "Baby, you're pregnant."

"I'm pregnant," Janis whispers before she gives a shocked laugh. "Holy shit."

"We're having a baby!" Cady says happily. Janis catches her when she throws herself at her again and hugs her so tightly, squeezing her close and resting her chin on her shoulder with a deep sigh.

"What if it's twins?" she whispers.

"Oh my god, can you imagine?" Cady chuckles.

—————

Janis can count on one hand the amount of times her feet touch the floor over the next few weeks. Cady either dotes on her hand and foot herself or gets hired help to do it, much to Janis' dismay. Short of going to the bathroom or walking herself to bed, she's treated like a princess in a tower.

It's nice for the first week or so, but after another, things get old. "Cads, I can get my own grapes. They're grapes."

"You're meant to be resting," Cady protests.

"I am! I haven't done anything but rest for three weeks," Janis huffs. "I'm meant to be exercising and stuff, too."

"Lightly," Cady retaliates.

"I haven't even been able to do that," Janis grumbles. "I need to be able to do a few things for myself or I'm gonna go crazy."

Cady sighs. "I'm sorry."

Janis leans against the counter. "It's okay. Just channel your worry in another direction, please."

"I will," Cady promises. "I'll stop chasing you back to the couch, at least."

Janis comes up behind her and kisses the side of her neck. "Thank you."

"I'm getting these grapes for you, though."

"Fiiiine."

—————

The next few weeks go much smoother. They still have a few small arguments, barely enough to even be called such, but Janis is feeling much better at finally being allowed to move around. She actually spent a whole day refusing to sit down just to make up for it all. Cady had a few things to say about that. They spend their time settling into their new rhythm, having blood work done to confirm Janis is actually officially for-reals pregnant, and relishing in the early days together.

Until one day.

"Caddy?!"

Cady goes running into the bathroom when she hears Janis' panicked yell. Janis jumps a bit when she slams the door open and looks at Cady with anxious tears brimming in her eyes.

"I'm bleeding," she says quietly. "Like, a lot."

Cady looks a little closer. Janis is, indeed, bleeding a fair bit. They'd been told a bit of spotting is normal, but this seems like... more. "Jesus, honey..."

"I think I'm miscarrying," Janis chokes. Cady shakes her head, both in denial and to clear it.

"Don't say that. Not yet. Let's get you cleaned up and go to the hospital," she whispers through her own tears. Her mind went there immediately, and she's almost positive Janis' words are true. But she can't let herself believe that yet. Can't let herself believe they've lost their baby.

She helps Janis get herself situated and into the car. Janis is quiet the entire drive to the hospital. She doesn't cry, she doesn't speak. She barely moves.

Cady bursts into tears halfway there. Janis looks at her and gently takes her hand off the wheel. Cady sniffs and drives with the other. "I'm so sorry, honey."

"For what? It's not your fault," Janis murmurs, holding Cady's hand to her heart and kissing her fingertips.

"I barely let-let you move for three weeks, you've only gotten two to-to really feel like you're pregnant and-and now we're losing them," Cady sobs.

"You were just trying to keep me safe," Janis comforts.

"Yeah, fat lot of good that did," Cady huffs through her tears. "Does it hurt?"

Janis shakes her head. "It's not... comfortable. But finding the blood was a surprise, I'm not hurting or anything."

"Good," Cady says. She takes a breath in vain and trills her lips. Janis squeezes her hand.

"It'll be okay."

"How-how are you so calm?" Cady murmurs.

"Panicking now won't do anything. Might make it worse, actually. And I'm worried about you," Janis shrugs. "There's... always a chance they're okay and this is just a weird thing."

A low chance, Cady insists in her head, but she doesn't say it out loud. "What if it's not?"

"Then we'll figure that out when we find out."

"...You're not really okay, are you?"

Janis' lip quivers and she chokes out, "Not even a little."

-

Cady pulls into the hospital parking lot and pays an amount of money Janis would've balked at had she not been married to a billionaire for seven years for a spot. People stare at them and point as Cady rushes up to the counter and Janis trails slowly behind her. Neither of them care.

"I think my wife is having a miscarriage," Cady pants, trying not to break down in front of the poor hospital receptionist. "She's almost eight weeks pregnant and she's bleeding a lot, I-I'll pay whatever it takes for her to be seen as soon as possible, we-we just need to know-"

The receptionist passes over a box of tissues and pages a doctor. Luckily, they wouldn't have had to wait anyway. They're called back to a small room and a curtain is tugged shut around an examination table to make it even smaller. Cady grips Janis' hand hard enough to nearly break both their fingers, but Janis doesn't even so much as breathe differently, let alone mention it.

A nurse comes in with a mobile ultrasound cart. Cady can't hold back more tears. They were supposed to have their first real ultrasound next week, to see their baby for the first time and make sure they were growing properly. Now they're having one to make sure there's even a baby at all.

They both wait with bated breath as the wand shifts every which way and the nurse frowns at the screen. Cady looks down to see Janis' fingers on her free hand are crossed tightly. She does the same.

"You're not having a miscarriage," the nurse says after what feels like a year, but can't have been more than five minutes. Janis and Cady both let out relieved sobs.

"They're okay?" Janis chokes. "You swear?"

"I swear. Your babies are both fine."

"Our what now?" Cady asks, suddenly very much not crying. Janis freezes beneath her.

"They're both kickin'. Not literally, of course, they don't really have legs yet. But their heartbeats both look steady, and they're charting properly for how far along you are."

"Both?" Janis echoes. "There's-"

"Oh my god, did you not know?" the nurse gasps. "I'm so sorry, I thought you had found out already! Um, you're having twins! Congratulations!"

"Twins?" Cady whimpers in delight. She looks down at Janis. Janis looks back. "They both stuck?"

"They sure did," the nurse chuckles. She turns the screen around so they can see, and sure enough, there's two little black orbs floating in grey static. "You kinda got the Cadillac of twin pregnancies, here. They each have their own placenta and amniotic sac, so they're the least likely to have any complications and things like that. And it means they're almost definitely fraternal. There's a small chance they're identical, but with you having had two embryos implanted and everything, all the signs would point to you having fraternal twins."

"And they're both healthy? I swear if something is wrong with them I will shut this hospital down so fast-"

"Caddy," Janis chuckles. "She knows what she's doing."

"You can see for yourselves. Let me zoom in a bit," the nurse says. She does, and Cady and Janis both look to see what she's doing. "This little blob thing here is baby A's heart, you can see how strong and steady it is. Oh, here."

She fiddles with the machine for a second, and suddenly an echoey pulsing noise can be heard in time with the rapid pulsing on the screen.

"That's their heartbeat?" Cady whispers, quietly sobbing again. The nurse nods with a huge smile on her face.

"Man, I thought I was gonna have to do the sad part of my job today, but I get to do the best part," she says to herself. "Let me find B for you, too."

They wait while she shifts a little bit, and then they watch the other blob's heart and listen to its steady beating for a long time. "Congratulations. I'll go get you all the boring pamphlets and stuff about twins."

"Thank you," Janis chuckles and sniffles at the same time. She wipes her eyes and leans back on the table. Cady watches as she bursts into hysterical laughter, and she can't help but join in.

"What's so funny?" she asks when they've calmed down a bit.

"I don't know," Janis giggles. "We just went from thinking we didn't have any babies to having two, my nerves are totally shot."

"Yeah, mine too," Cady agrees with a smile. "Twins."

Janis stops giggling suddenly, looking at Cady with a remarkably sober expression. "Do... are you... are you okay with twins? Do you want two?"

Cady squeezes her hand for the umpteenth time since they got to the hospital. "I was afraid of it when we put two in."

Janis just blinks at her, with more tension in her body than Cady's ever seen a human hold. Including herself, and that's saying something.

"But now that I know," she continues. "I've never wanted anything more."

Janis smiles. Cady smiles back and bends down to kiss her.

That's how the nurse finds them, so she just quietly leaves the pamphlets and ultrasound photos on the table next to them and ducks back out of the room. Janis is barely in the realm of reality enough to break away from her wife long enough to say, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," the nurse responds, shutting the door behind her.

"Let's go home," Cady whispers against Janis' lips. Janis nods and gives her one last good smooch.

———

"You should still lie down, baby. I know they're healthy, but you've still had a stressful day," Cady says as Janis enters their large house, both of them heaving a sigh of relief.

"...Will you come too?" Janis mumbles, like a small child asking for a hug from their parents. Cady chuckles.

"Of course. Let me get settled, I'll be right there."

Janis nods contently and pads off to the bedroom. Cady grabs her work laptop from the study and a snack for them from the kitchen before she follows her.

Janis is curled up under the covers in their huge bed when she enters, remote in her hand and browsing on the TV for something good to watch. She hesitates on Tangled for a minute before she pulls a face and moves away from princess movies.

Cady swoops in next to her and kisses her cheek. Janis squeals in surprise as Cady gently pushes her backwards onto the bed and pins her down. Cady hovers on her elbows so she doesn't put any pressure on Janis' stomach before she leans down and kisses her soundly. Janis hums in surprise, but she quickly winds a hand into Cady's hair and tilts her head to the side to kiss her back.

"I love you," Cady whispers between long kisses. "The gorgeous mother of my babies."

"Plural," Janis whispers back.

"Thank you," Cady murmurs against her lips. "For doing this."

"You're welcome," Janis chuckles. "But this does mean you're probably gonna have to take a little more time off work than we planned."

"I am anyway, whether something happens or not. Three months both ways, at least," Cady says immediately.

Janis frowns in confusion. "But your dad-"

"Is my boss. If he gets mad at me for taking time off to care for his daughter-in-law and grandbabies he can suck eggs."

Janis laughs and twists little pieces of Cady's hair together. "But you love your work."

"I love you more," Cady says with a shrug. "You're pregnant with twins, darling, it's going to take a fair bit out of you. I want to spoil you as much as I can throughout this. And if that means taking some time off earlier than I need to or working from home, then... so be it."

"Such a devoted mama," Janis grins. Cady pulls back a bit and looks into her eyes. "Baby, why are you crying?"

"I'm gonna be a mama," Cady sobs quietly.

"Yeah," Janis chuckles, reaching up to wipe her tears away. "Did you just notice?"

"No, it's just... it's the first time we've said it," Cady laughs with a sniffle. "We're going to be mamas, Jay."

"We are," Janis agrees.

Cady slides down a bit and gently tugs Janis' shirt up. Janis tips up on her elbows to look at her confusedly. Cady doesn't give her any response before she leans in and carefully presses kisses all over her tummy.

"That tickles," Janis laughs, squirming under the pressure of her wife's lips.

"I'm kissing my babies, it's not my fault they're in you," Cady retaliates, pressing another just above her belly button.

"It kinda is, though," Janis responds. "Dork."

"Hmph," Cady hums, continuing her onslaught of kisses. Janis simply chuckles and accepts her fate.

————-

"Janis!" Cady says, eagerly running into the room about a month later. Janis jumps so hard she nearly falls out of bed.

"What happened? What's the matter?" she asks frantically. Cady is panting like she just ran a marathon and brandishes her phone.

"Guess what?"

"What?" Janis asks desperately, rolling out of bed and going over to her wife.

"The babies are the size of figs!" Cady squeals like this is the most exciting news in the world. Janis pauses.

"Figs?"

"Uhhuh! Look," Cady says, showing Janis an image on her phone. Janis looks at the screen and chuckles.

"I thought someone died," she sighs in relief. "How big even is a fig?"

"Uh... this one says they're as big as brussels sprouts," Cady offers, switching to another app and allowing Janis to see she has about twelve. "And this is what they really look like, aren't they cute? They have little legs now! And it says they're already kicking but you probably won't feel it for a few more weeks."

Janis tilts her head as she looks at the graphic of the little fetus on Cady's phone screen. She thinks it looks a little more like some kind of alien shrimp creature, but she's just glad Cady's excited. "Does it say anything about when I'll stop vomiting every day?"

"Well, you're out of the first trimester after next week, so hopefully then," Cady says, gently cupping Janis' cheek. "I'm sorry you've been so sick."

Janis shrugs. "Two little goblins in there pushing on my insides. Kinda makes sense."

Cady giggles. "Hey, those are our little goblins."

"And they're gonna be goblins until they're about eighteen," Janis snorts.

"Cute goblins, though."

"They better be. Least they can do," Janis replies.

Cady laughs again. Her smile gradually softens and she leaves her hand cupping Janis' cheek. Their conversation fades for a short moment before she murmurs, "You're so beautiful."

Janis feels herself blush and tries to look away. Cady follows her gaze and shifts her hand to rest on the small, but steadily growing, baby bump.

"And this is the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life."

"Stop it," Janis whines. "I'm too hormonal for this."

Cady giggles and shakes her head. "Hm-mm. I'm gonna tell you every day. You're getting that glow, and seeing you with this little tummy makes me so happy. And I know you're gonna be the most amazing, beautiful mother."

"Nah," Janis hums, pulling Cady in closer and pressing her lips gently against the curve of her jaw. "You are."

"No way," Cady scoffs. "You're the one doing all the work. You've got all the chemicals and hormones in there making you even prettier than you were before."

"I really am gonna start crying if you keep this up," Janis warns. Cady laughs and fiddles with the ends of her hair as Janis rests her head on her shoulder.

"Fine. Then can I talk to the sprouts?"

"The sprouts?"

"The babies," Cady says like it's obvious.

"Oh," Janis laughs. "Um... sure. I don't know if they can hear you yet, but-"

"I don't care, it's a good habit to start forming," Cady says immediately.

Janis sighs lovingly and goes to lie back down. She lies on her side, and Cady lies facing her, scooting close enough that her lips brush against Janis' tummy. Janis smiles and runs her nails gently through the roots of her hair. Cady gives the babies a proper greeting, and explains her entire side of the family. She tells them how she and Janis met, and about what dating her was like, how their wedding went, and how excited they were when they found out about them.

Janis smiles lovingly the whole time, chuckling occasionally at the seriousness with which Cady is talking to their unborn children that may or may not actually have ears.

Cady ends her softly spoken tirade with, "And I know you have a lot more growing yet to do, and I want you to do that. But your mother and I are so, so, so excited to meet you. You're going to be the most perfect babies ever. And we're gonna love you so much. We already do."

Janis sniffles, prompting Cady to look up at her. Cady wiggles so she's actually at her eye level and leans in to give Janis a comforting kiss. Janis whispers, "I love you."

"I love you so much," Cady echoes. "All three of you."

—————

"I'm worried Maddie's going to faint," Cady says anxiously as they get ready for her family's Fourth of July celebration. Janis laughs from the bedroom where she's finishing getting dressed.

"She might," she agrees. Madeleine always at least gets teary when one of her sisters-in-law announces a pregnancy. Twins might be too much for her. "Callum's still strong, he'll catch her."

"Maybe I'll stand behind her," Cady says, fussing over her lipstick. Janis enters the restroom behind her, and they lock eyes in the mirror. Cady can't help the wide smile that splits across her face.

"What?" Janis asks, sheepishly adjusting her overalls over her red shirt.

"Nothing," Cady replies.

"What?" Janis insists with a whine. She's gotten much fussier during her pregnancy, which Cady is weirdly delighted by. It's almost endearing, and she's more than happy to assuage whatever is plaguing her sweet wife in the moment.

"You're just so cute. The overalls and the belly. I can't take you," Cady giggles, turning around to face her. She rests a hand on either side of her wife's tummy and leans in for a kiss. She has to lean a little further every week. Janis happily kisses her back.

"You messed up your lipstick again," Janis whispers when they break apart to breathe.

"Worth it," Cady breathes back before leaning in again.

—-

Not all of Cady's siblings made it to the celebration. Christmas is a priority for the family, but most often they spend other holidays scattered around the world with various other loved ones. And, though she'd never admit it, her favorites did make it. Clark is here, Callum and Madeleine are here with their four children, and Clifton and Hannah with their two daughters.

Janis stands behind Cady to hide her belly while everyone mills around on one of the docks waiting for burgers and hot dogs to be grilled. One of the house chefs is making them, but Cady's dad is thoroughly supervising as though he has any idea what he's doing.

Janis gently winds her arms around Cady's shoulders and kisses her neck. She shifts her lips higher and whispers, "You ready?"

"Are you? Everyone's gonna want to touch your belly, are you okay with that? I'll fight them off," Cady whispers back. Janis chuckles and kisses her jaw.

"No, it's okay. I figured they would, I can handle it for a while," she replies.

"Remember the signals. If you change your mind. I'll throw someone in the lake if I have to," Cady says insistently.

"Even your mom?"

"Especially my mom."

"Damn. You're committed," Janis chuckles.

Cady shrugs and gently leans back against her. "I'm kind of surprised nobody's noticed yet."

"We're being totally inconspicuous," Janis chuckles sarcastically. "I'd like to tell them before I start eating for three so I don't get stared at, though."

Cady laughs out loud at that. A few of her family members look at her and she freezes, but they just smile and return back to whatever they were doing. "You'll be fine. Should we just do it now?"

Janis shrugs. "Up to you."

Cady kisses her for strength and takes a deep breath. "Hey, uh..."

"Did you say something, dear?" Cady's mother asks. "Speak up."

"Yeah, but this is kind of for everybody to hear. We have a little surprise," Cady says. Her mother helpfully takes over.

"Everyone! Gather 'round, please, Cadence has something for us," she yells. Everyone except the chef puts down what they were doing and circles around them.

"What is it? Do we get presents?" the youngest child, Zacharias, asks eagerly. Cady laughs and reaches to ruffle his hair.

"Not this time, kiddo, sorry," she says apologetically. Zach pulls a small face and seems visibly disappointed, but he cheers up when his big brother Lennox wraps an arm around his shoulders and rubs his knuckles through his hair.

"Ow, Lenny!" he says eventually.

"Boys, settle down," Madeleine scolds gently. "What is it, Cades?"

Cady freezes. She's not even the pregnant one, and she can't get the words out. Janis frowns in concern for a moment and gives her a little squeeze.

"We're pregnant," Cady says hastily. "Well, mostly her. But, yeah."

Pandemonium is not a strong enough word for what breaks out. Confused children get shoved out of the way by older siblings and parents screaming in excitement, and Cady and Janis are wrapped in more arms than they can count within seconds.

"Oh my god, congratulations! My little Cady's all grown up!" Madeleine says around happy tears. "Having a baby of her own, I can't believe it!"

Janis smiles widely. "About that."

Madeleine snaps to look at her, and her eyes widen. "No." Janis nods, her smile growing. Madeleine screams in delight and runs in to hug her alone. "Twins?!"

"Triplets," Janis replies. That gets her. Madeleine collapses in her arms, and she barely has the strength to pass her to Callum. "Kidding. Yeah, just twins."

"Congratulations," Callum says, tapping Madeleine's cheeks as he tries to revive her. "And thanks for breaking my wife."

"You're very welcome," Janis replies with a mischievous smile. Cady gently whacks her arm. "Hey!"

"You stinker," Cady giggles. She squeaks as her parents both tackle her in a hug. She looks at Janis with eyes wide as saucers. You'd think she'd just been bitten by a shark.

"Congratulations, dear," her dad says. "Twins?"

Cady nods. "Twins."

"Why aren't you carrying them?" her mother asks.

"Because Janis wanted to," Cady responds.

"Are you planning on more?"

"Not at the moment."

"When is she due?" her mother asks.

"December," Janis replies. "But they'll probably be early, so we don't really know."

"Are you planning on breastfeeding?"

"Mother! Enough with the questions, please," Cady pleads. "Please just be happy for us, let us do this the way we need to."

Her mother humphs a little bit, but she does smile and squeeze her the slightest bit. Cady relaxes ever so slightly into it. Janis watches with a proud smile, and jumps when she's beckoned over to join the hug. "Oh, but you must let me throw you a baby shower."

"A small one," Cady says. "Like, brunch group small."

"Oh, bah," her mother says. "You're no fun."

"Mother," Cady says warningly.

"Fine, fine. No more than thirty people. Janis, I'll need contact information for your people so I can get things arranged," she says.

"Of course," Janis chuckles. "You'll finally get to see Damian again."

Damian and Cady's mother had met for the first time at their wedding and, somehow, got on like a house on fire. Apparently they still text regularly with party planning tips and quiche recipes, and have semi-regular coffee dates.

"Oh, that darling," Cady's mother says eagerly. "I can't wait. Congratulations again, loves."

"Thanks mom," Cady says with a smile. Her mother smiles back and kisses her cheek before she goes on to join in the suddenly much more lively celebrations.

"Surprised she hasn't already insisted on doing the nursery," Janis hums as she wraps Cady in the closest thing to a hug they can manage around her belly. Cady laughs.

"She only just found out, she's got to have enough time to come up with a theme and things," she replies. Janis laughs with her.

"Do you have any theme ideas?"

"Do you even want a themed nursery?" Cady retaliates, looking up at her with genuine interest. Janis considers this quite valid point.

"...Depends on the theme."

"Circus?" Cady suggests. Janis looks at her incredulously.

"I'm terrified that that was your first suggestion," she says. Cady laughs.

"I wasn't really serious," she says, saving herself in the eyes of her wife. "Dinosaurs?"

"Dinos might be cute," Janis agrees with a nod. She herself absolutely loved dinosaurs as a kid. It's definitely something to consider. "What about, like, just animals? Or safari or something."

"Oh, that would be adorable," Cady coos.

"Yo, mamas! Come eat," Clark hollers at them, interrupting their discussion. They both jump a bit and laugh as they head to join the line for cheeseburgers and hot dogs.

"We'll figure it out," Janis says as she sees the gears still clunking around in Cady's head.

"I know," Cady says. "I just like knowing things ahead of time."

"I know you do," Janis chuckles. "We have plenty of time. I'm only eighteen weeks."

"Almost nineteen. We're nearly halfway through, and the babies will probably be early, there's so much to do-" Cady says, getting progressively more frantic.

"Caddy," Janis interrupts, putting down both their plates so she can take and squeeze Cady's hands. "It's gonna be fine, okay? The babies aren't even gonna be in the nursery for a few months. They could come tomorrow and we'd be able to figure it out. Even if they come early, they'll be okay with a nursery that isn't perfect."

"They'd better not come tomorrow, you're not past the viability point yet," Cady mumbles. Janis laughs.

"There's my girl."

Cady smiles and tucks herself into her wife for a quick hug. She takes a detour when she pulls back to kiss Janis' belly, and then leans up to kiss Janis too. She bats Janis' hands away from picking her plate back up, and piles it high with all the delicious sides and carries it to the table on her behalf.

"Thanks," Janis says when she sits down next to her. Cady just nods and takes her hand under the table. Janis gives her a squeeze, and Cady squeezes back.

They stay like that throughout the meal, absentmindedly eating with their free hands and making casual conversation with relatives. Zach is very excited now that he knows he's getting two new little cousins soon and lovingly pesters his still-recovering mother with lots of questions about where babies come from and things of that sort. Janis snorts into her potato salad when he incredulously asks, "They're gonna come out her vagina?!"

Everyone else returns to their various activities once the meal is done and digested. Kids leap into the lake, parents stand anxiously watching from the shore or join in themselves. Cady's parents go inside for a nap, and Cady and Janis spread out a blanket on the sand and lie down together. Cady leans in and presses her lips against the top of Janis' rounding tummy a few times before she nuzzles in a little higher. Janis wraps her arm around her and holds her close, kissing the side of her nose as Cady also drifts off for a quick little cat nap in the sand.

Janis smiles to herself as she rests her head down against her other arm and watches her wife sleep.

God, I hope they look like you.

—————-

The next morning, Janis gets the wits scared out of her by Cady sitting bolt upright in bed next to her with a quite dramatic gasp.

"Jesus, what happened?" Janis gasps herself. Cady turns to look at her with a stricken look.

"We forgot to tell Damian!"

"Oh," Janis sighs in relief. "Don't do that, I thought you were having a heart attack or something."

"Oh. Sorry," Cady says sheepishly. "I can't believe we forgot to tell him, though!"

Janis chuckles and pulls her wife back against her. "Cads, it's not a big deal. We only told your family yesterday."

"But we told yours a week ago, we should've told him then!"

"Let's just do it now, hm?" Janis offers. Cady nods. "He's gonna scream, watch out for your ears."

"Just turn the volume down," Cady says. Janis pulls her phone out and texts Damian asking if he's available for a Facetime. She grabs one of her positive tests from her nightstand drawer and holds it, figuring that'll be the simplest way to get him to understand.

"Hey babes," Damian greets when the call connects. "Ugh, look at those pretty faces."

"Hi Damian," Cady greets with a giggle.

"Angel, how are you?! It's been too long," Damian says.

"It has! You have to come up to see us sometime soon. I can't believe it's already been a month, usually we can't even make it a week!"

"I know, I know, I'm sorry. My show schedule has been crazy," Damian says. He'd been cast in a production of The Wedding Singer and unfortunately had to devote too much time to that to be able to visit them on their normal schedule. "I miss you guys."

"We miss you too," Cady says. Janis nods.

"You guys should come see the show!" Damian offers. They usually do, but Janis wasn't up for the traveling, being so sick most days.

"We want to," Janis says apologetically. "I don't think we'll be able to this time. But we're cheering you on in spirit, baby boo."

"Thanks," Damian says, striking a remarkably homosexual pose. Cady and Janis both laugh. "Bummer you guys can't make it."

"Yeah, we're sorry," Cady says. "I'm sure you're great, though. And it'll be more than worth it."

"Worth it? What do you mean? If you guys can't come you can't come, it's no... big..."

Janis held up the test in the middle of him speaking, and they watch him take a few seconds to process before they have to mute him entirely to save any scrap of their hearing. When they see his mouth start to move in recognizable shapes again, they turn the sound back on.

"-baby! Holy shit, congratulations! I can't believe it! A baby! I'm gonna be an uncle!"

"It's twins," Cady says. Janis has to mute her phone again. Cady recognizes his lip movements partway through. "No, we're not fucking with you, we're really having twins."

It's a solid ten minutes before they can unmute him this time.

"My mom wants your help throwing her baby shower, she'll be in touch about that soon," Cady says when he's gone from the screaming phase to the hysterical sobbing phase.

"Of course! Oh my god, I'm gonna be a twuncle!" he sobs.

"No. New word," Janis says immediately.

"Twinkle."

"No."

"You have plenty of time to think of something tolerable," Cady interrupts. "And we'll be sure to bring them along to your next show. Well, once they're old enough."

"Yes! Oh my god, I can't wait. Okay, I have to go now or I'm gonna be late for work. I love you both and those little babies blossoming in your uterus very much. Have a wonderful life."

"Bye, weirdo," Janis snorts, hanging up on him and dropping the phone somewhere to be lost in the duvet. "There. Everyone is told."

"That's a relief."

—————

"Caddy!"

Cady goes tearing through the house and crashing into the room when she hears Janis yell for her. It sounds panicked. We can't be going through this again. They were fine the first time. Not again. "What happened?! What's the matter, are you bleeding again?! What's wrong?!"

"No, no, come here!" Janis insists eagerly. Cady pauses and reassesses when she sees her wife is actually... laughing. No bleeding, then.

Confused, Cady heads over to her wife. Janis grabs her hand and rests it right on the front of her belly.

"Feel," she says.

"Feel what?" Cady asks.

"Just keep your hand there," Janis says. Cady frowns at Janis' belly, but obediently keeps her hand where it was placed. After about thirty seconds, there's a little bump right against her palm. Cady screams and jerks her hand away before she realizes what it was and quickly puts it back.

"Oh my god! They're kicking!" she squeals.

"They're kicking," Janis agrees, laughing and crying at the same time.

"That means they have feet!" Cady says eagerly. Janis laughs harder.

"I- yeah, it does," she nods. "Doesn't it feel crazy?"

"Yeah," Cady agrees quietly. Janis frowns sadly when she suddenly lets out a sob. "That's our baby. Our baby's in there. Kicking you."

"And there's another one too," Janis hums, brushing Cady's hair out of her face and kissing her cheek. "We're getting pretty close now."

Cady nods again, but doesn't say anything. Janis is perfectly content to let her rove her hands all over her tummy, feeling for every little motion their babies make. Eventually, little jolts start happening at regular intervals on the other side.

"I think A has the hiccups," Janis giggles. "That's where they were on the last exam. B must've been the kicker then."

"They're so cute," Cady says with a sniffle, feeling each little jolt caused by each hiccup.

"Says you. You try having something with the hiccups inside you," Janis chuckles.

"Does it hurt?"

"Nah. It's just... really fucking weird, Cads," Janis replies. Cady laughs.

"I can imagine." She leans down and presses her lips to the right side of Janis' belly to talk to that baby in particular. "Hey, hold your breath! You're making your mother uncomfortable!"

Janis laughs again. "He can't help it."

"He?"

"I think we have at least one boy in there," Janis hums as Cady straightens back up.

"Really?" Cady asks. Janis nods.

"I'm almost positive," she replies. "What do you think?"

"I... I don't know," Cady replies. "I haven't had any... feelings."

Janis smiles and wraps her in as tight of a hug as they can manage. They slowly sway around their bedroom as they continue speaking. "I guess that makes sense. It's probably harder when they're not inside you."

"How crass," Cady giggles.

"I'm a heathen, remember? It's in my job description to be crass," Janis chuckles, kissing Cady's neck. They're quiet for a moment before she asks, "What do you want?"

"In what way?" Cady whispers back.

"Do you want sons? Daughters?" Janis asks. She doesn't sound like she's particularly fussed with whatever Cady says. She sounds like she genuinely wants to know.

"I just want all of you to be healthy," Cady replies.

"Come on, we both know that's a load of shit," Janis says. "As long as you know you'll love them even if they don't turn out that way, what do you want?"

Cady laughs. "In that case... I really hope you're right. One of each would be so sweet. But even if we have two boys or two girls, they'll be perfect. But I really, really just want two healthy babies and my healthy, beautiful wife."

"One of each would be fun," Janis agrees. "I guess we'll find out."

"And we'll find out soon!"

—————

"Ceiling would be a good name," Cady says quietly one night. Janis leans up on her elbows to squint incredulously at her wife in the darkness.

"You want to name one of our babies Ceiling?"

"I didn't say that. But if it didn't mean what it does, I think it would be a nice name. It has a good sound to it," Cady says, suddenly sounding much more sheepish. Janis laughs and cuddles into her side.

"I guess it does," she agrees. "But we're not naming our baby that. I know we're rich and famous, but we're not that rich and famous."

"No, of course not," Cady says immediately.

"Ceiling would be a good name, though," Janis agrees now that she's given it more thought.

"There's lots of words like that."

"Like what?"

"That would be nice names if they didn't mean what they mean," Cady says.

"...Like what?" Janis asks again.

Cady thinks for a moment. "Basket."

Janis considers this and nods. "I guess it does sound kind of name-ish."

"I told you! There's all sorts," Cady says.

"Cardigan," Janis says. Cady nods eagerly.

"Yeah, exactly!" she says. "I'm so relieved you understand my nonsensical ramblings most of the time."

"Most of the time they're actually pretty sensical," Janis chuckles. "But your ramblings are always my favorite."

"Hush," Cady scoffs quietly. Janis laughs and shakes her head.

"Nah."

She can almost hear Cady rolling her eyes, even though she can't see it in the dark. Janis can't help but continue thinking of words that could fit as names in alternate universes.

"Paper," she says quietly. Cady nods.

"Sofa."

"Enough," Janis continues. Cady deflates a little. "No, like, as a name. It has a fun sound."

"Oh! Yeah, you're right," Cady giggles. "Carrot."

"Carrot is great," Janis chuckles. "Ceiling and Carrot."

Cady laughs so hard she nearly pushes Janis off her. Janis can't contain her giggles either, and they spend a frankly concerning amount of time giggling at nothing in the darkness together.

Janis wipes tears of laughter from her eyes. "Android."

"Band," Cady says.

"Prophecy," Janis says with incredible drama.

Cady gives an oooh and thinks quietly for a moment. "...Chlamydia."

"Wh- Caddy!" Janis splutters out a shocked laugh.

"What?! I'm not saying anyone should name a baby that! I'm just saying that if it wasn't... that, it has a pretty sound!" Cady defends. She's laughing more at Janis' near-uncontrollable laughter than the actual idea of naming a baby after an STI.

Janis presses her forehead to Cady's shoulder and continues giggling into the blankets. When she calms down again, she says, "I love you."

"I love you too," Cady says softly.

"I'm glad we still know how to make each other laugh," Janis continues, ghosting a touch over Cady's collarbones with her pointer finger.

"I am too," Cady replies, tucking her head against Janis'. "I'm glad I have you to keep me smiling."

"I'm glad I have you to give me some excitement," Janis murmurs.

"I'm glad I have you," Cady says plainly.

"I'm glad I have you too," Janis murmurs. Cady adjusts them to such a position that she can lean in for a sweet, soft, lingering kiss. "And I'm glad I get to do that whenever I want."

Cady smiles and gently flicks her ear. "Goof."

"Oh, I'm the goof for being glad I have the hottest wife in the world that I get to kiss whenever I want?"

"Yes, because you don't have the hottest wife in the world," Cady giggles. "I do."

Janis scoffs. "Maybe before you knocked me up. With twins, might I add."

Cady shakes her head. "Especially now."

"...Really?"

"Of course, really," Cady giggles again. "You've always been beautiful. And you always will be beautiful to me. No matter how you feel about yourself. You're beautiful now, even though you're not happy with your body. You're carrying our babies. I don't know if you've ever been so beautiful. You always were, of course, but now... I can't stop looking at you. And you'll be beautiful when you're all wrinkly and your hair is all grey and we're sitting in rocking chairs together somewhere and we can only eat soup."

Janis chuckles and leans in for another kiss. "You really think you'll wanna be with me when all I can eat is soup?"

"Of course. Don't you?" Cady asks.

"Yeah. You'll be a cute old lady," Janis says immediately. Truth be told, she's always pictured the same thing. Every new line or scar on Cady's body is a revelation. A sign that she's changing. She's aging. Janis is always excited to get to know the new her with the new changes, slight as they are. As terrifying as it is, she's excited to be an old lady if it means she gets to know Cady as one too.

It's nice to know she feels the same.

Janis kisses her one more time. "Do you have any, like... real ideas for their names?"

Cady shakes her head. "Not really. I've had a few that sounded nice, but nothing has really given me that definite yes sort of feeling yet. Do you?"

"I have one I'd really like if we have a girl," Janis says quietly. "But I kind of want to wait until they're born and name them when we see them."

"I'd like that," Cady says. "What's the name?"

"You'll find out if we meet her," Janis hums smugly. Cady scoffs.

"Stinker."

"Hey, you were the one just going on about how excited you are to see me as a grandma," Janis retaliates with a giggle.

"I take it back," Cady sighs lovingly. "You're such a goofball."

"I'm not the one who wants to name a baby Chlamydia."

"I said I don't!" Cady insists before they break into peals of laughter again. Janis joins in, pressing her forehead against her wife's and laughing against her lips.

"God, we're gonna be parents."

—————

The next day they giggle about it all again on their way to their ultrasound appointment to see that the babies are still developing on track. Janis is used to it all by now, but she still shivers at the chilly gel rubbed onto her stomach.

"Aww," Cady coos when one of their babies' faces is visible on the screen. Janis smiles and watches too.

"That's B today, getting that sweet little face growing just fine," the doctor says as she shifts the wand all around and takes measurements of their limbs.

Janis and Cady chat while the scan continues. Little things, like what they want for dinner; they really should call Damian, it's been so long; look how cute the baby's little fingers are.

"Hm," the doctor hums softly, looking at the scan with a small frown before referring back to her notes. Cady and Janis' conversation halts in its tracks, and they both turn to see her. "You're planning on a home birth?"

"Yes," Cady says, squeezing Janis' hand.

"I'm afraid that might not be possible," the doctor says in concern.

"Why not? Are the babies okay? What-what's the matter with them?"

"As far as I can see, they're both still perfectly healthy," the doctor soothes immediately, noticing both of them starting to panic. "But you have a little troublemaker in there."

She shifts the wand a bit for another angle to confirm her suspicions, and she nods gravely. "Your baby A in here is the issue. They're in what we call the frank breech position."

"But they're okay?" Cady asks desperately.

"I can't see spectacularly well, but they've been doing just fine in all your previous scans, I don't think anything could've gone terribly wrong with them in the meantime."

"But what does that mean? Why can't I have a home birth?" Janis asks, sighing in relief now that she has reassurance that the baby is okay.

"Well," the doctor sighs and rolls over to a cabinet, pulling out a baby doll. She curls it gently in on itself. "Ordinarily babies are sort of curled up like this, and then they straighten out during delivery to come out safely. B is like that, you can see them here."

"Okay," Janis says. "Doesn't breech just mean they're upside down? Won't they flip over before I go into labor?"

"Ordinarily, yes," the doctor explains. "But frank breech means that your baby is... like this."

Cady and Janis both blink in shock as she folds the doll sharply in half.

"Their legs are up in front of their face, in this sort of V-shaped position. Look here," she says. Cady and Janis both look at the screen. "Those are feet, and that's their ear. At about the same level."

"Oh," Janis says. She can't hold back a giggle, in spite of the bad news.

"For pregnancy it's perfectly fine, even if it does make it harder for me to check on them. But for delivery... it's, er... well, to be frank with you ladies, the baby would likely come out bum-first. With a vaginal birth, that puts an incredible amount of strain on both the baby and you."

Janis can imagine delivering a baby bent in half would indeed be considerably more painful. "So... I-I have to have a C-section?"

"I don't want to dash all your hopes just yet, but I'd expect so. With you carrying twins, they're very cramped for room in there, so I don't expect they'll straighten out in time for you to deliver naturally. You'll be having weekly scans from now on anyway, but if they don't unfold before you're about 36 weeks it's almost a definite, unfortunately."

"Damn it, kid," Janis tuts under her breath. "As long as they're healthy. They can come out however they want to."

"B is doing just fine, A's heart looks great. And their legs are clearly growing on schedule to be so long. Anything else isn't really an immediate concern, just keep an eye on how you're feeling and make sure you get here every week for those scans."

"We will," Cady says, squeezing Janis' hand. Janis nods.

The doctor wipes the gel off of Janis' belly before she leaves. Janis pulls her shirt back down and sits up with Cady's help.

She's almost silent again as they walk to the car, and most of the way home. Every time Cady looks at her she seems fine, almost content, but Cady has reason to believe otherwise. "Are you okay, my love?"

Janis looks at her, and she seems almost confused. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"...Because your entire birth plan has to change now? You were very adamant about what you wanted and now you're being forced into practically the opposite."

Janis shrugs. "I kinda figured I wouldn't be able to have a home birth once we found out there were twins. I've had plenty of time to prepare for the possibility of things changing. I'd still prefer that, but if I have to have a C-section then I have to have a C-section. I don't think trying to fight it will do any good."

"I'm still sorry you're not getting your... is dream birth a weird thing to call it?"

"Yes," Janis laughs immediately. "It's really fine, Cads. As long as they're out of me by the end of the day, at this point I couldn't give a flying fuck how it happens. And this way I won't have to work so hard."

"You'll still have to work very hard," Cady says in concern.

"I know. But hopefully I won't get all sweaty," Janis says. Cady chuckles and takes her hand.

"That's what you're worried about?"

"I don't have anything else to worry about right now," Janis says with a shrug. "If we find something else to worry about then I'll worry about it. But I hate being sweaty, so hopefully that won't happen now."

"I love you," Cady says. Janis turns to look at her and smiles.

"I love you too."

Cady continues driving, and they're silent until they're nearly home. Cady fidgets with Janis' fingers with her free hand and quietly says, "We get to pick their birthday this way."

"Exactly," Janis chuckles. "You're getting it."

—————

After much discussion, they pick November 16th to be their babies' birthday. They were told to pick a day in mid-November to avoid Janis going into labor as best they could, and to give the babies enough time to finish growing. They didn't want it close to Halloween, but also not too close to Thanksgiving. And Cady likes even numbers, so the 16th was a quick pick.

The weeks fly by, the hospital bag is packed. Cady dances around the house the morning of as they gather all their things and drive to the hospital. "We're having babies today!"

"This is really not a we thing," Janis grumbles crankily.

"We get to meet our babies today!" Cash amends. Janis chuckles and squeezes her hand. "How are you feeling?"

"As well as I can knowing I'm about to be sliced open and have twins removed from me," Janis replies. Cady blinks, but she nods.

"Okay. That's... definitely one way of putting what's about to happen," she replies. "Are you scared?"

Janis nods. Cady pouts.

"I'm sorry, honey. I'll be right there with you, I won't let anything happen to you. Or to them. I promise."

"I know," Janis says softly, squeezing her hand again in thanks. "That's the only thing keeping me from totally spiraling right now."

"If they do anything I will shut that place down so fast. Everyone's getting fired, I swear to god," Cady says. Janis laughs.

"Caddy, it'll be fine. I know it will, but knowing I'm about to be numbed from the tits down for like, multiple hours, and again, have babies removed from my stomach just isn't the most pleasant idea."

Cady is quiet for a moment. "I'm still gonna fire them all. I'll hire new better doctors myself and get the best ones to make sure you're okay."

"You've already gotten me into the best hospital for C-sections in the state, babe, we'll be fine," Janis chuckles. "Calm down a little. Rage later if you need to, but don't get yourself all worked up now."

"I'm just excited," Cady mumbles sheepishly. Janis smiles.

"Good."

"Are you?"

"God, yeah," Janis chuckles. "Our little munchkins are coming today. And I don't have to be pregnant anymore. I'll probably be able to sleep on my stomach again by tomorrow night!"

“That's what you're excited about?" Cady giggles."You don't know, man. You try being pregnant with twins sometime," Janis huffs.

"No, I'm alright, thank you," Cady says immediately. Janis laughs. "I think one set is plenty for us."

"Definitely," Janis chuckles. "God, I saw in the news the other week that this couple did the same thing we did but both their eggs split and they ended up with quadruplets."

"Heavens," Cady shivers. The idea of the two of them raising two babies, even with all their money, is frightening enough. She can scarcely imagine four. At a stoplight, she bends over and kisses Janis' belly. "Thank you for staying how we put you."

Janis laughs again. "How are you feeling?"

"I have never been so afraid in my life," Cady says honestly. "But I've never been so excited either."

——

They both have the jitters by the time they pull into the hospital parking lot. Janis waddles slowly behind Cady as they head inside. Cady pauses at the door, knowing they'll be leaving with their babies. This is the last door they'll enter as a family of two, before their two and two make four.

Cady gets them all signed in, and then they have about an hour to get used to things before their surgery is scheduled. Cady cracks some very weak dad jokes, but Janis laughs all the same and gives her adoring smiles with each one. "You gotta step up your game, babe."

"I know," Cady whines after a particularly bad one about blankets for the babies to be kept at 'womb temperature'. Janis smiles and pats her hand.

"You'll get there. They won't be able to understand them for a good few years anyway," she says comfortingly. Cady smiles and leans in to kiss her.

That turns out to be the last practice shot she gets. Doctors come pouring in to get Janis dosed up and the both of them into sterile clothes. Cady is suddenly hit with the realization that this is all happening, like, right now as Janis is wheeled to the operating room and she's left to run after them.

It takes a very

very

very

long time.

Janis doesn't exactly look comfortable, but she doesn't complain of any pain. She does mention offhandedly that it feels like she's being squashed by an elephant, but that's the extent of her complaints. Cady is the one with most of them.

"This is taking forever," she whines into Janis' shoulder behind the partition. Janis tries not to laugh and risk jostling anything while someone has the fancy equivalent of a knife held at her gut.

"I don't know about you, but I'd prefer they take their time," she responds. "It can't be much longer. You've waited eight and a half months, we almost get to meet them now."

"The anticipation is killing me," Cady huffs. "I want our babies out and you safely put all back together and I want to take all of you home and love on you until they're in college."

Janis smiles. "I love you."

Cady smiles back and leans down to kiss her. "I love you too."

"Oh!" the doctor suddenly exclaims, and Cady is on her feet in a flash.

"What happened?! Are they okay? Is she okay?" she says desperately.

She freezes as she hears a shrill cry split the air. She looks down at Janis, who smiles dopily back at her. Tears start pooling in her eyes as she looks back and forth between her wife and the doctor.

The crying continues for a moment as the people on the other side of the partition handle the situation, and then a tiny baby is held over it for them to see. "Here's your baby B."

"B? What happened to A?" Janis asks.

"Apparently this one decided he wanted to be born first. Kicked A out of the way!" the doctor chortles.

"He?" Cady says with a quiet sob. The doctor nods, and Cady immediately leans in to kiss Janis. "A boy."

"I had a feeling there was at least one in there," Janis chuckles. Their son is passed off so they can get the other twin out and Janis closed up before too much longer. Another shrill cry rings out, and Cady and Janis both start sobbing again.

"Here's little A," the doctor says. "Miss Troublemaker."

"A girl?" Cady whimpers, looking at the little pink squirming thing. "We-we got both?"

"Certainly looks that way!" one of the nurses says cheerfully. Cady hesitantly steps around the curtain to cut the cords, trying very hard to focus on that and not her wife's insides on the outside. The surgeon gets to work handling that, and the babies are taken to the counter in the room to be measured, weighed, and cleaned off.

It feels like hours have passed before two swaddled little babes are carried back to them, still crying about all they've been through today. Cady sits back by her wife and smiles as one baby is tucked against her face on either side.

"Hi," Janis whispers through her tears, bringing up a hand to rub each soft little cheek. "Hi, babies. Thank fuck you're out."

"Hey," Cady laughs wetly. "Mind your profanity."

"They're crying so loud they can't hear me anyway," Janis chuckles. "Shh, I know. I know. I'm crying too, I know. We're all okay."

Cady sobs again and leans across their son to kiss her wife soundly. "You're all perfect. Absolutely perfect."

"They're... they're not missing toes, or anything? They're okay?" Janis sighs heavily.

"They're both just fine," one of the nurses says with a chuckle. "I'm new, but they're the healthiest twins I've seen so far."

"I told you," Cady says with a laugh.

Once Janis is put back together and stitched up, they're wheeled back to their room to rest and bond as a family for the very first time. Cady props Janis up with pillows and crawls into bed behind her. Janis winces as she has to move, but she leans back into Cady with a relieved sigh and finally gets a good look at their babies.

Cady kisses her neck gently and looks at the little ones over her shoulder. "They're so beautiful. And you're so strong. I... I can't believe they're here."

Janis smiles at the sleepy babies in her arms. "They're here."

"I love you," Cady whispers. "So much. Look at them. Look at what you brought into this world. They're perfect. You're the strongest person I know. And you're so beautiful. Thank you."

Janis blushes and feels tears start pooling in her eyes. "Don't make me cry, I just got Frankenstein-ed back together."

"I'm sorry," Cady laughs. "But it's true. Thank you for doing this. And I'm sorry you didn't get the experience you wanted."

"We have them," Janis says quietly. "That's all I wanted. They're safe, and they're here."

"And they're perfect," Cady murmurs. "These are ours."

"Our babies," Janis echoes with a smile. "The girl is bigger?"

Cady nods. Janis had been in the process of getting stitched up when the nurse told them, so Cady took in everything she could on her behalf. "She's six pounds and four ounces. This one. And our little boy is six pounds even."

Janis looks at their daughter in her left arm and son in her right. "They look just like you."

"You think?" Cady asks softly, resting her chin on Janis' shoulder. Janis nods and leans even harder back against her.

"They do. They look more similar than I thought they would, too."

"They do," Cady agrees. Both babies have impossibly full cheeks, matching little button noses, pouty mouths, what would be wide eyes if they were open, and Cady's dainty little ears.

Janis pulls off their little beanies, and Cady can feel her sigh.

"What's the matter?"

"I had two blonde babies?" Janis says in exasperation. "Two? Blonde?"

"That's exactly what my hair looked like when I was born," Cady chuckles, looking at the tiny tufts of strawberry blonde hair on each perfect little head.

"I guess I can live with it then," Janis sighs, but Cady can feel her smile. "They need names."

Cady nods. "What do you think?"

Janis looks back and forth between the babies, trying to decide which of them to start with. "He looks a little bit like a Charles."

Cady almost knocks everyone out of the bed in her shock. "You want to name him after my father?"

Janis shrugs. "Why not? Your dad and Charlie are some of the most important people in your life. And how often do you get to bring the fifth generation of a name into the world? Come on."

Cady blinks in surprise as she considers this. She looks down at the little burrito sound asleep in Janis' arms and considers this. "Charles Jacob Heron. The Fifth."

"Jacob," Janis murmurs. "You guys have too many Charles' already. We'll call him Jacob. Jakey."

"Jacob," Cady echoes. Janis gently brings him up to kiss his nose. His eyes flutter open as she brings him back down.

"Hi, baby boy," Janis greets with a smile.

"Hi Jacob," Cady echoes quietly, reaching around her wife to gently stroke his hair. "Happy birthday, handsome."

"Baby Jakey," Janis says. "You like your name?"

Jacob's response is an impossibly wide yawn. Cady and Janis laugh. "Goodness. Being born is hard work, huh?"

"He's such a Jacob," Janis says fondly as she kisses his forehead again and he's asleep once more. "Jakey suits him."

"It does," Cady admits. "You're sure about the name? My father hasn't-"

"I'm sure. Your father has made a lot of progress too. And we can always say we named him after Charlie instead."

"I'd have preferred Clifton," Cady chuckles. "But I guess you're right."

"What's Clif's middle name again?"

"Joseph."

Janis looks back at the baby and wrinkles her nose. She shakes her head. "Nah. He's not a Joey."

"He's a Jakey," Cady says with a smile. "What about our beautiful girl?"

Janis shifts her gaze to the other baby, and finds her awake. She gazes up at them with unfocused little eyes. "Oh, hi. Nice to meet you, sweet girl."

"They really do look so similar," Cady breathes. "Both their eyes are that color."

"What color is it?" Janis says quietly, tilting her head to look. "If I had two blonde, blue-eyed babies I'm going to scream."

"They look more grey to me," Cady says soothingly. "That's exactly what Elsie's eyes looked like when she was born, and they turned brown as she grew. I think they'll get darker."

"They'd better," Janis grumbles sarcastically. "God, she's cute."

"She is," Cady agrees. "Little stinker. You had to be all bendy in there, huh?"

Janis laughs as Cady gently tickles the baby's little chin. "She didn't have much room in there."

"That's true," Cady says. "You never told me that name."

"What name?"

"You said you had a name you really wanted if we had a girl, but you didn't want to tell me until we saw her and knew for sure if it fit her," Cady says. Janis tries to remember that conversation, and she laughs.

"How do you remember that? That was, like, four months ago," she responds. Cady shrugs.

"Naming our babies is important. It stuck out to me."

Janis looks at the baby. "Isla. I fell in love with you on that island that first Christmas."

"Isla," Cady breathes. "It's perfect. Hello, Isla."

"She's looking at you," Janis chuckles. Cady smiles and gently rubs the pad of her thumb up and down the bridge of the impossibly tiny nose. Isla's eyes flutter and it's not long before she's sound asleep. "What about her middle name? You should pick it. I chose all the rest."

"No, we chose together," Cady protests.

"From my suggestions."

"Yeah. That's fine."

"Cads," Janis insists. "Pick a damn name."

"Stop swearing in front of them!" Cady huffs.

Janis turns as best she can to glare at her. "We have, like, at least eight months before they can talk. One damn isn't gonna hurt them."

"You said fuck too," Cady grumbles. Janis laughs and groans at the pain it causes. Cady gently adjusts her wife and peers back at the tiny baby.

She barely has to look at the baby before a name comes to mind.

"Joy."

She can feel Janis smile as their cheeks are pressed together. "It's perfect."

"You think?" Cady asks shyly. Janis nods, and Cady can feel a few tears streaming down her cheek.

"Isla Joy," Janis whispers thickly. "It's beautiful."

"But you really think it suits her?" Cady asks worriedly.

"I think it's perfect for her," Janis nods.

"Really?"

"Caddy," Janis chuckles. "Trust me. Joy is a perfect middle name. I love it. She looks exactly like an Isla Joy. It's just right."

Cady smiles and kisses Janis' neck, looking at both their peacefully sleeping babies. "Isla Joy and Charles Jacob."

"The most precious babies there ever were."

———

Janis is totally dead to the world less than an hour later for a much deserved nap. Cady helpfully deposits the babies back in their... storage containers, she decides to call them, and lingers by her wife for a long time. Long after Janis is asleep, she's still gently tracing shapes on her bicep, murmuring thanks and love into her hair, peppering ghost-light kisses on her forehead.

Janis snuffles at the last one, and the one thing Cady does not want to do is wake her up. Carefully, she removes herself and leaves her wife to nap in peace, and goes to introduce herself to their babies instead.

"Hello, sweet babies," she croons softly as she scoops the tiny new little ones back into her arms and holds them properly, all by herself, for the very first time. "Hi. I'm your mama. Well, one of them. Your other mom is asleep right now. Isn't she beautiful?"

She wanders in circles around the room, pausing frequently to check on Janis or to look at the same view of the random field outside their window.

"I love you so much," she whispers down at the babies. "I've loved you from the moment I found out you existed, and now I finally get to hold you and see your sweet little faces."

She takes a shaky breath as delighted tears start streaming down her face.

"I might not make a very good mom. I definitely won't be perfect. But I promise you both I'm going to try so hard to make your lives amazing. And I'll always, always, love you both," she continues. "You two and your mother are the most precious things I've ever had, do you know that? I'm not going to risk letting anything happen to any of you. I'll keep all of you safe. I promise. And I'll love you your whole lives long."

She jumps as she turns around for another lap around the room and finds Janis awake, smiling at her with a few tears streaming down her face.

"Hi."

"Hi," Janis echoes. "How you doing, Mama?"

"I should be asking you that," Cady says, handing her their daughter while she keeps and smiles at their son.

"I'm fine, Cads. Do you have any idea the amount of drugs I still have coursing through me? I got, like, another good few hours before I really start feeling anything," Janis chuckles. "Ow, shit."

"Exactly," Cady huffs.

"I'm fine, though," Janis insists as she winces through adjusting her position.

"I can get you more meds if you need," Cady says, carefully putting the baby down to help her before she scoops him back up and cradles him close.

"I'm fine," Janis says for a third time. "I promise. Come love on these little munchkins with me."

Cady smiles and sits in a chair next to Janis' bed. "His eyes are so big. And he's got such long eyelashes already. And those chubby baby cheeks."

"They're only gonna get chubbier," Janis says happily. "She has the cutest little ears."

"He does too," Cady smiles. Jacob wraps his tiny hand around her finger, and she kisses the tips of each tiny baby finger. "And his hands are so small."

"Their nails are so tiny," Janis says. Cady nods.

"I can't believe they're actual people. They're so small, there's no way a whole human can fit inside there," she says absently. Janis laughs and groans again.

"Somehow. I'm not sure either," she says. "I'm still not sure how they both fit in me."

"I'm not either. No wonder you've been so sick, your body must have done a whole lot of rearranging to make room."

"You're telling me," Janis hums. "But it was worth it, huh Isla?"

"Now everyone gets to recover," Cady tells Jacob. He blinks at her. "Yeah. You're gonna stay here for a few days, and then Mommy and I get to take you home to rest. And you're gonna barf and poop all over us and scream your little head off at us, and we're still gonna love you! Isn't that wild?"

"Stop making me laugh," Janis groans from the bed. Cady smiles sheepishly.

"Sorry."

"It's okay," she says. She hands Isla back and smiles as she sees her little family all together. "You're so sweet with them already."

"I'm terrified, Janis," Cady whispers, staring into their son's unfocused little grey eyes. "They're so perfect. I can't mess them up."

"We won't," Janis promises. "We have each other."

"But they're... they're like the first snowfall, right now. I can't be the one to mess that up. I don't want to be the first footprint in it," Cady continues desperately.

"We can't help making mistakes. But I know how much you love them, babe, we're gonna do okay. I can't promise we won't fuck them up somehow, but I know we'll do everything we can not to and everything we can to fix it. You've already done so much for them. You took incredible care of me through my whole pregnancy, and you still are. We're gonna figure this out together."

"Together," Cady breathes shakily.

"Always together," Janis promises. "Especially because if you ditch me with these two now I will sue your ass so hard."

Cady laughs. "No, never. You're never ever getting rid of me. I might be one of those mothers who tries to move into the college dorm with her kids."

"Your mom didn't-"

"Of course not, she didn't even know where I was," Cady hums. She looks down to explain to the babies.  "I'm talking about your Nana. She won't treat you that way, I promise. She's done a lot of work on herself. She's already bought you two tons of presents. She can't wait to meet you."

"Oh, shit," Janis says.

"Stop swearing!"

"You're just gonna have to learn to live with it, babes," Janis says with a smile. "We gotta call Damian. I forgot to tell him. Again."

"Yay!" Cady squeals. She looks down at the babies again. "Are you two ready for the loudest phone call of your life? I hope so."

Janis can't help but laugh again, keeping a hand on her pained stomach. They get the four of them situated together on the hospital bed, the babies face-to-face in each of their arms, and Janis holds the phone facing the sleeping babes as the call connects.

As expected, Damian's answer is a shriek as soon as he processes what he's seeing. Janis smiles and turns the camera around to face herself and Cady.

"Those are babies!" he says.

"No shit," Janis says.

"Hey!" Cady insists.

"Hi Caddy!" Damian says eagerly.

Cady laughs. "Hi Dame. Surprise!"

"They're so cute," Damian coos as Janis puts the camera back on the twins. "Oh, they look just like you, Cads."

"They might have Janis' eyes," Cady explains eagerly. "Aren't they perfect?"

"Yes," Damian coos.

"This is our little boy. Charles Jacob, after Caddy's dad. But we're calling him Jacob," Janis says proudly.

"You had a boy?!" Damian squeals.

"We did! We had one of each," Cady confirms. Damian shrieks again.

"Oh my god! Oh, how perfect! Look at them, oh my god! Oh my god, oh my god! What's your girl's name?"

"Isla," Cady says with a smile. "Isla Joy."

"Jacob and Isla," Damian says, testing out the names. "Excellent. They sound like rich people names but not pretentious."

"Perfect," Janis chuckles.

"Have the media hounds swarmed you yet?"

"The media hounds don't know we scheduled a C-section for today. But I'm sure they'll be filling the parking lot before too long," Janis sighs. Cady leans into her comfortingly.

"It'll be okay," she murmurs. "I'll protect you."

"Aww," Damian coos. Cady blushes as she remembers he can, in fact, hear them. Janis leans in for a kiss and elicits yet another shriek from their friend. "It's too cuuuute! I can't stand it!"

"Hang up then, coward," Janis says, like she hasn't just had the softest moment possible with her wife and newborn babies.

"Hey!"

"Janis!" Cady scolds.

"What? I just had two babies cut out of my gut, I get a free day to say whatever I want," Janis hums. Cady shrugs.

"I suppose that's fair," she says. "Sorry Damian."

"It's fine. Lemme see them again," Damian insists. Janis chuckles and obliges, allowing their friend to coo over his niece and nephew for as long as he wants. They stay on the call for almost three hours, talking about the babies and them and everything in between.

"You're still coming for Thanksgiving?" Janis asks before they hang up.

"Yes! And if you try to do a single goddamn thing I swear to god I will drag you through the town square and throw you in the river," Damian says. "Bye. Love you."

"Love you too, D," Janis chuckles. She hangs up and flops back against the pillows with a sigh. "What a day."

"A good day," Cady says.

"The best day," Janis agrees, handing Isla to her and cuddling into her side.

"Get some rest, my love," Cady murmurs, bending at a strange angle to kiss her forehead. "We'll wait for you."

Janis yawns and smiles. "I love you."

"I love you too."

—————

They're all released from the hospital three days later. Cady carefully carries the babies out the doors of the hospital in their top-of-the-line car seats while a nurse wheels Janis behind them. Janis gets in the car first, and then Cady struggles through trying to get the car seats in place for the first time with babies inside.

After a solid hour, the seats are both snapped in where they go, and Cady gets to drive her family home.

They have a crazy first month trying to adjust to having twin newborns. Damian comes and provides them with an excellent but unbelievably chaotic Thanksgiving, and stays for a week afterwards to help them handle everything. Even with a maid and a chef hired on so they could focus almost exclusively on the babies and themselves, it's still unbelievably hard.

Cady is adamant about the two of them being the only ones to raise their babies and absolutely refuses a night doula. She drags both bassinets over to her side of the bed and declares she'll handle all the nighttime bottles and diaper changes. Janis is only woken up when one of the babies is truly desperate for some snuggles from their mommy. Otherwise Cady insists she get plenty of rest and time to heal. Janis doesn't complain.

—-

A week after the twins' one-month birthday, they brave the outside world for the first time. It's Christmas time, and time to take the babies to the annual Christmas celebrations hosted by Cady's parents in one of the Heron Enterprises hotels. Luckily, this year's is close to home, and they only have a few hours' drive instead of an international flight.

Cady smiles as they cross the threshold, and Janis sighs. She's only been out of the hospital for a month. Traveling is hard on her body.

Cady carries the babies in and gently sets them down before she turns to her wife. "You wanna go nap?"

Janis nods. "But they'll want to meet the babies."

"And they'll have plenty of time to," Cady soothes. "Let's go get settled in."

She can see the relief on Janis' face as they head to the elevators instead of right in to greet everyone.

"You feeling okay, baby?" Cady asks, gently cupping Janis' cheek. Janis smiles softly and nods.

"I'm just tired."

"Are you sure?" Cady insists. Janis nods again and takes her hand off her face to hold it instead.

"Promise. Cross my heart and whatnot," she says. Cady smiles and leans in for a kiss.

They both jump the slightest bit when the elevator dings, and freeze when they hear someone inside sigh. The doors open, and out comes Madeleine. She seems rather shocked to see them there. "Hi. I was never here, I saw nothing."

"You don't have to do that, Maddie," Cady chuckles. "Come up with us, you can meet the twins."

Madeleine looks to Janis. Janis smiles and nods, to which her sister-in-law squeals and wraps her in a gentle hug. Cady picks the babies' car seats back up and they all go into the elevator together.

"How are you feeling, Janis? You look incredible, absolutely unfair," Madeleine says, pointedly not looking at the babies so she gets the surprise properly. Janis laughs and winces a bit.

"As well as I can be," she replies, resting a hand over her healing incision. "Considering Cady was positive I'd die on the table."

"Your intestines were outside your body! You need those!" Cady insists frantically. Madeleine laughs.

"I'll make her go easy on you while we're here," she tells Janis. Janis smiles at Cady.

"No need," she says softly. "She barely lets me do anything now."

"Because you need to rest," Cady says.

"They're a month old and you're already spoiling them," Janis chuckles.

"All the siblings do, I think it's genetic," Madeleine chuckles. "When Lennox was little his feet never touched the ground. Callum absolutely refused to let him go."

"How is he sixteen?" Cady sighs sadly.

"He was born sixteen years ago," Janis replies. Cady rolls her eyes lovingly at her.

"I know that. But I still remember holding him in the hospital," Cady says.

"And now you have your own little ones," Madeleine smiles. The elevator reaches the right floor, so everyone trails out and down the hall to their room. "Now let me at 'em."

Cady rests both seats on the bed and carefully undoes their buckles. "Who do you want?"

"Both!" Madeleine says as if it's entirely obvious. Janis laughs and picks up Jacob, so Cady gets Isla out.

"This is Jakey," Janis says as she gently hands him to his aunt. "Jacob. And that's Isla."

"How beautiful," Madeleine coos. "God, I miss babies. These two are dangerous."

"Maddie, you had four, that's plenty," Cady chuckles.

"But mine are all big now. These two are still in the smushy little baby stage," Madeleine sighs.

Janis chuckles and gets herself comfortable in bed. Cady leaves Madeleine to coo over the gingerbread man-patterned onesies the twins have on while she sees to her wife. "Do you want me to stay?"

"Do you want to stay?" Janis replies. Cady pauses and considers this. As soon as she's downstairs, she'll be bombarded with questions about Janis and the babies. Part of her wants to go so Janis doesn't have to deal with that on top of healing and struggling through keeping twin babies alive. But the rest of her is just very tired.

"Yes... please. Is that okay? That leaves you with more to handle," she says anxiously. Janis chuckles and scoots over to make room for her to nap too.

"That's just fine. We'll do it together," Janis whispers. Cady nods and cuddles into her.

They're long asleep by the time Maddie gently rests the babies in their cribs and tiptoes out the door.

—-

A few hours later, they enter the foyer hand in hand with babies in arms. You'd think Jesus himself had just walked into the room.

Everyone turns to look, everyone gasps and starts chattering all at once, everyone rushes up and starts coming over the little ones, touching their hands and little cheeks and asking if they can hold them.

They both say yes and watch anxiously as their twins are passed from relative to relative. Cady swoops in to follow one around as Hazel, Charlie and Violeta's surprise daughter and the youngest of the kids (until now) at just seven years old peeks over her big brother Henry's shoulder and asks if she can hold baby Jacob.

Janis bites her lip as a ten-year-old Naomi and her nine-year-old brother Zacharias fight over Isla. The fight is broken up by Cady's mother, who takes the baby and kisses her before Janis can get a single word in about not doing that, please and thank you. She starting to get dizzy, looking desperately back and forth between both of her babies and trying to keep track of where they are. Isla's with her Nana- no, now Fiona has her. Now Jacob's with Hazel and Isla's been moved to Lana and-

"Hey, are you okay?"

Janis jumps and looks to see Madeleine next to her. Janis blinks back tears and shakes her head. Madeleine frowns in concern and takes a step closer so nobody can overhear them.

"What's the matter?"

"I need them back," Janis chokes. "I-I... I..."

"Say no more. Leave it to me," Madeleine says. Janis watches through teary eyes as she swoops around the room and returns with her wife and a baby, then sends the two of them out of the room and meets them in the hall with the other.

"Thank you," Janis sobs quietly as she finally has both her little ones back in her arms.

"Baby, what happened?" Cady asks in concern, cupping Janis' face with a hand and brushing the tears from her cheek with a gentle swipe of her thumb.

"I don't know," Janis sobs. "I just... there's so-so many people, and-and... I couldn't see them both and-and-and... I don't know!"

Madeleine gently wraps an arm around her shoulders and rubs her arm soothingly. "Cads, do you remember that time when Lennox was a baby and I had a panic attack because I couldn't find him? And it turned out you just had him in the bathroom and were trying to give him pigtails?"

"Yeah," Cady says in confusion. "Why?"

"This is that," Madeleine replies. "But worse."

Janis somehow hasn't heard that story before and releases a strangled sort of half-sob-half-laugh. "I... I trust ev-everyone, but I-I-I panic every time they're out of-of my sight, and-and I couldn't see-see them at the same time, and I-I just... I don't know."

"You don't have to explain, my love," Cady hushes. "I'm sorry, I didn't even think about how overwhelming that would've been for you."

"It's okay," Janis sniffs, leaning into her.

"You take your time. I'll go make something up, come back in when you're ready. Cady will make sure this happens on terms you're okay with," Madeleine says comfortingly.

"Thanks, Maddie," Janis sniffles again. "Did Lenny ever get his pigtails?"

Madeleine smiles. "He called her Auntie Piggies until he was four."

"He liked them!" Cady defends.

"Tell that to Fiona. Your next victim," Madeleine chuckles. She heads back into the room, leaving Cady, Janis, and the twins alone in the hall. Cady looks at the little ones still asleep and curled up in Janis' arms, and Janis' chest shaking as she tries to calm down.

"Come here," Cady coaxes gently. Janis sniffles and follows her down the hall to the parlor. Cady sits on one of the sofas that's there more for decoration than actually to be sat on, and Janis sits next to her. "Are you alright, love?"

Janis nods, but she doesn't say anything. She keeps her eyes firmly on the babies and firmly off her wife.

"No, you're not," Cady insists with a furrowed brow. "Talk to me. Please."

Janis looks up at her, her eyes watering again. "I'm sorry."

"No, honey," Cady says desperately.

“I'm sorry," Janis repeats. Cady watches in concern as she starts sobbing again.

"Baby, you have nothing to be sorry for," Cady murmurs. "I just need to know what's been going on. I need to know how I can help, that's all."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Janis sobs quietly. "I-I didn't know how, and everything just... it just..."

"I know," Cady hushes. "Will you tell me now? Or try? I'm your wife, you don't have to justify yourself to me. Just tell me how you're feeling."

"I don't even know," Janis chokes. Cady shifts off the couch and crouches in front of her, squeezing Janis' hands and looking deep into her eyes.

"Just try, please?"

Janis sighs and takes a long time to collect herself. Cady just squeezes her hands and lets her. Janis takes a deep breath before she begins, "I-I don't know what's wrong with me."

Cady frowns as she sees tears welling in her eyes yet again. "Nothing, baby, absolutely nothing is wrong with you."

"I can't... I can't breathe when they're out of my sight," Janis whispers. "Every time, even if you have them and I know they're okay, I just... I... I get so freaked out worrying about if they're still breathing or if they're hungry or hot or sick or even if they're just... I don't know, itchy, or something. I... I know in my head that they're fine, but I always just run through the worst-case scenarios and I just get myself even more worked up, and..."

She trails off, but Cady doesn't need to hear anything more. "How long?"

"Hm?"

"How long have you been feeling like this?" Cady asks. Janis is quiet again.

"...Since we found out she was breech."

It's Cady's turn to be quiet. "Three months?"

"I-I guess, yeah," Janis sniffles.

"Three months?!" Cady repeats. "You've been suffering like this for three months and you didn't tell me? Why?! Why wouldn't you-"

"I didn't know how!" Janis says pleadingly.

"I could've done something so much sooner if I had known-"

"What was I supposed to say? That I turn into a neurotic, jittery, anxious pile of garbage on the brink of a heart attack every time I blink?!"

"Yes!" Cady insists. "Yes, you were! Because then we could've had this conversation before bringing them to meet my entire family and I could've understood before you had a panic attack! And I could've put together that you've clearly been suffering from postpartum anxiety much sooner and gotten you the proper help for it!"

Janis looks down again. Cady takes a deep breath.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it like that. This shouldn't be an argument."

Janis shakes her head. "It's my fault."

"No, baby, it isn't," Cady insists, shifting to hold Janis' face instead. "You've been struggling, and you didn't have the words to let me know. I wish you had tried anyway, but... this has already happened. All we can do is go forward. And going forward, I need you to tell me when things aren't right, please. Even if you can't figure out how, just tell me something is wrong and we'll figure out what it is together, okay? I hate seeing you so upset."

"I should've told you sooner. I knew this would happen."

"Maybe, but there's nothing to be done about it now. I know now, and I can help."

Janis nods her head to signal she wants Cady next to her again. Cady sits down, and Janis leans into her. "I need help."

"I know," Cady whispers.

"Finding out that she was breech hit me harder than I thought it did. And knowing there was always a chance with the way she was positioned that something could've gone wrong and they'd miss it. I-I wanted to be a chill mom, and I thought I was, but it just turned my world upside-down and I haven't gotten back. I just feel that... loss of knowing, I guess. Of control. And I'm terrified every time I can't see for myself that they're okay that they're actually... not. Even if they were a second before."

Cady lets a few of her own tears slip into Janis' hair. "I'm so sorry, my love. I should've noticed."

Janis chuckles softly. "You've been mighty sleep deprived."

"Is that why you've been so insistent on helping with their night feedings?"

Janis shakes her head. "That's because I'm worried about you. I still get it when they're with you, but not anywhere near as strong as when they're just in their cots or whatever."

"Or with other people?"

"Apparently," Janis sighs.

"I'm getting you a therapist," Cady says softly. "That's a non-negotiable."

Janis nods. "Okay."

"I'm so sorry."

"For what?" Janis asks, looking up at her.

"I can't believe I didn't see how much you've been struggling," Cady says. "I should've noticed."

"Don't beat yourself up about it," Janis says softly, tucking back into her. "I kinda made sure you didn't."

"Don't ever do it again," Cady begs. "Please. I want to know. I want to help."

Janis nods. "I won't."

They both look down when they feel a wiggle, and see Jacob wriggling crankily before he releases a shrill cry. "Oh, pumpkin."

Janis carefully adjusts him to check her watch. "It is lunch time, huh?"

"I'll get their bottles," Cady says. "Gimme this one. Practice."

Janis chuckles as she passes Isla to her wife and smiles at them together. Cady gently scoops Isla beneath the shoulders and kisses her nose before cradling her in her arm. Janis sees to hushing Jacob and waiting for them to return.

Cady carries Isla into the kitchen to prepare the twins' bottles. Janis tries not to laugh as she hears Cady talking to the baby. Hearing the woman who talks like she's straight out of a Dickens novel cooing, "Hello, my sweet little princess babykins, are you ready for a baba? Are you hungry? Yeah? My sweet widdle pumpyumpykins. Let's get your baba." in a ridiculously high pitch is comical in a way few can describe.

After about five minutes and the terrible, deafening sounds of the bottle machines going off, Cady returns with their daughter and two bottles to feed them.

“He back to sleep?" she asks when she sees Janis gently rocking their son. Janis nods with a soft smile and gently strokes one of his chubby cheeks with the back of her index finger. "Good."

"How's our pumpyumpykins?" Janis asks with a small giggle. Cady flushes a remarkable shade of scarlet and looks down at the baby with a whine.

"You heard that?"

Janis nods and giggles again as she slowly stands and heads over to her. "Yeah, I did. But I think it's cute."

"I can't help it," Cady whines. "They're both so precious."

"I do it too," Janis chuckles. "It's just funny when you do."

"It is? Why?" Cady asks, tilting her head like a confused puppy.

"Because most of the time you have a transatlantic accent and use words like shan't and chauffeur and legality and clams."

Cady laughs outright at that. "Clams?"

"Hey, I'd never had one before I met you, far as I'm concerned they're a fancy food," Janis chuckles. She kisses Cady's forehead, and Cady smiles up at her.

“I love you," Cady says.

"I love you too," Janis replies. She doesn't quite know where that came from, but she'll always say it.

"Are you ready to go back in? We can just call it if you're not. I'll handle everything," Cady asks gently.

Janis inhales heavily and looks between the babies. She wants to go back in, wants everyone to have their proper chance to meet their grandchildren and niece and nephew and cousins, but her body is still tense and her mind is still racing. Cady notices her hesitation and takes her hand again.

"What if we did one at a time? You can keep your eyes on the one being held and keep the other with you," she suggests. "We can give Isla her bottle now and wait a bit on Jakey, since he's asleep. And you can just say you want to feed and burp him yourself. And by the time he's done everyone will probably have finished with her and we can swap them."

Janis considers this, and she nods. "That would be great."

"And I'll mention not kissing them again," Cady promises. "Just to be safe."

"Thank you," Janis whispers, kissing her wife soundly. Cady just smiles into it and kisses her back.

They linger on the bench outside while Cady gives Isla her bottle and they both have a chance to coo over and focus on her. Janis braces as she swallows the last of her milk away and Cady props her up to be burped.

"Ready?" she asks when Isla's all situated. Janis nods, and they head back into the living room where everyone is waiting.

Janis was expecting people to stare, ask questions, have noticed what happened, but nobody seems to. Whether they're pretending or genuinely just absorbed in their own conversations, Janis is relieved.

One person did notice, however. Hazel comes up to the two of them looking very sheepish. She quietly says, "I'm sorry I held the baby. I saw you crying."

Janis frowns. "No, kiddo, it wasn't your fault. You guys just looked so sweet together I got emotional. And the babies needed their lunch, so we just went to get that, see?"

She gestures vaguely with Jacob as he's eating his bottle. Janis smiles down at her son as he makes a little coo around it that sounds vaguely affirmative.

"See? He says he's okay too," Janis comforts.

"Oh," Hazel says, visibly brightening.

"Would you like to meet Isla?" Cady asks with a smile. Hazel bounces up and down rapidly and nods. "Go sit down."

Hazel runs back to her brothers on the sofa and plops herself down, eagerly holding out her hands. Janis watches Cady prop her arms with pillows before she ever so gently lays their sleeping little girl in her cousin's arms.

"Remember not to kiss them, please," Cady says softly. Hazel nods and looks down at her other new baby cousin.

"They look the same," Hazel says, making sure to be quiet. Cady laughs softly.

"They do. Auntie Janis and I weren't sure how similar they'd look, but sometimes even we have a hard time telling them apart," she says.

For all her loud and bold personality, Hazel is remarkably still and quiet as she holds and looks at the baby. "Would she fit in my baby doll clothes?"

"Maybe," Cady giggles. "If it's a very big baby doll."

Hazel considers this and shakes her head. "It's small."

Cady chuckles and continues watching like a hawk. Isla just snoozes, and Hazel just watches.

"Can I kiss her on her foot?" she asks after a while. Cady looks to Janis. Janis chuckles and nods.

"Go ahead," Cady says. Hazel happily picks up Isla's leg and carefully kisses the bottom of her tiny foot. She smiles contently and gently pats the baby for good measure.

She stays there a while longer before she asks, "Can I go play now?"

Cady laughs and gently removes the baby from her lap. "Of course. Go have fun."

"Bye!" Hazel says to the baby in a quiet but eager voice before she runs off to try to cajole Zacharias into playing with her. Cady carefully hands Isla to the next relative wanting to meet her, her brother Clifton, and smiles proudly as she stands protectively nearby. Janis smiles faintly from her spot nestled in the couch as their son finishes off his bottle and she props him up to burp him.

Surprisingly, nobody tries to take him. Hannah sits down next to them and coos over him for a bit, and Janis happily lets her hold him while keeping a sharp watch on their daughter. After about the fifth check in, she realizes her wife has everything handled. Isla is safe.

Before too long, everyone's met and held both babies at least once. Introductions have been made, uncles have been pooped on, big yawns have been tossed around at aunties, and many a stretch has happened in the arms of grandparents.

"You're gonna get a lot of loving from all those people," Cady informs the babies as they're in the elevator on the way back up to their room to prepare for dinner. "That went well, I think."

"It did," Janis agrees. "Other than me having a panic attack."

"Of course, other than that," Cady says hastily. "How are you feeling?"

"Better," Janis promises.

"Good," Cady says. "Let's skip dinner."

"What?"

"We've already seen everyone, they can live without us for one night," Cady insists.

"But it's Christmas Eve," Janis says, frowning in confusion. "Don't you wanna spend it with your family?"

"That is exactly what I want," Cady whispers, gently pressing her against the wall for a kiss once they're on their floor and being very careful not to squish the babies between them. "Let's have our dinner sent up and snuggle our babies in bed and watch Christmas movies."

"That sounds amazing," Janis whispers against her lips. Cady kisses her once more before leading her back to their room to get cozy in their huge bed.

—-

"These movies are so unrealistic," Janis huffs at their third Hallmark movie. "There's no way a princess would just ask some schmuck into her palace like that!"

Cady looks between her, herself, their babies, back to her, around the room, and back to her.

"Shut up. I'm not a schmuck."

"I never said you were!" Cady laughs. "I do think you're right, though. We must be an anomaly."

"Not everyone gets knocked on their ass by a hot billionaire," Janis agrees. Cady giggles against her shoulder.

During the Muppet Christmas Carol, Janis feels Cady's head shift to peek down at the babies, as they sleep side-by-side in a special basket all bundled up together. Jacob's forehead rests just against Isla's cheek, and their arms are as linked as newborn babies can manage. Cady whispers, "They're so precious."

Janis looks down at their little ones and smiles. "Yeah, they are."

"You made these," Cady continues softly, gently adjusting Jacob's Santa onesie away from his neck and ever so gently patting his belly.

"I made them out of you," Janis hums contently. "Those little button noses are all yours, and their lips, and their ears. And their skin is really fair, so they'll probably get a few freckles as they grow. And their hair is yours, and their eyebrows."

"I think they'll have your eyes, though," Cady says happily. "Pretty brown. And I think they have your lips, not mine."

"Really?" Janis asks. Cady nods happily. Janis chuckles and noses into her hair. "Maybe."

"Definitely," Cady says. She's quiet for a moment before she softly says, "I've been a billionaire all my life. My play jewelry when I was a kid had real gold and gems. And these are still the most precious things I've ever had in my life."

Janis smiles even wider and kisses Cady wherever she can reach. "Good thing you get to keep 'em, then."

She can feel Cady smile, and Cady shifts to ever so gently straddle her at her hips. She takes special care not to aggravate Janis' still healing belly and gently leans down, cups her face between her hands, and kisses her soundly. "Thank you."

"For what?" Janis gasps in between kisses.

"Them. You," Cady replies, kissing her hard again. "Everything. You're just as precious to me as they are. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. The best thing I ever ran over on the sidewalk."

"So you admit you ran me over now, hm?" Janis laughs, threading her fingers through Cady's hair and smiling into a much more gentle kiss.

"You carried my twins for almost nine months, it's kind of the least I can do," Cady replies haughtily. Janis chuckles again and pulls her down harder against her. Cady happily leans in and kisses her again, and again, and again.

"I love you," Janis whispers when they take a pause to breathe.

"I love you," Cady echoes. They both turn their heads to the side when they hear a sort of squawk, and find Isla wriggling crankily before she lets out a shrill cry. Cady pouts and quickly scoots off of Janis to scoop her up before she can wake Jacob. "Oh, pumpkin, what happened, hm? We love you too, you know, you don't have to be so sad! Oh, what's the matter, come here. Mama has you, you're alright."

"You're so good with them," Janis murmurs, leaning into Cady's shoulder as she carefully cradles the baby's neck and tucks her into her chest. Janis strokes her fingers up and down the baby's back to help soothe her as Cady gently pats her little bum and hushes her.

Cady chuckles like she doesn't believe her and shakes her head.

"You are," Janis insists. "Look how quick you got her calmed down."

Isla gives a couple more half-hearted wails before she changes her mind and contents herself with being held. Cady smiles and pulls her back a bit to see her little face. "There we go, hi, baby. You just needed a little love, huh?"

"You just needed to hang out with Mama for a second, hm? Mama makes it all better," Janis coos. Isla coos back. "Yeah. She's the best, isn't she?"

"Nooo," Cady hums at the baby, holding her close again to kiss her cheek before she passes her to Janis. "Your mommy is the best. Yeah, there you go!"

Janis adjusts the lot of them, so Cady is half-sitting against the headboard, Janis is reclined with her back against Cady's chest, and Isla is carefully propped into a sit against Janis' bent legs. Janis holds her hands to keep her steady and makes sure the baby doesn't really have to hold up her own head all that much. It's hard work when you're only a month old.

"Hi, pretty girl," Janis coos when they're all settled. She gently combs a hand through Isla's little tuft of strawberry blonde hair. "Did you have a good nap with bubby? Yeah? Good sleep?"

Cady smiles and rests her head on Janis' shoulder. "Hi pumpkin. Sweet baby girl."

Each of them take turns cooing over their daughter, both of them already knowing one-on-one time with either of their babies will become a progressively more rare commodity. Jacob is perfectly content to continue his snooze by himself in the basket for now.

Isla's still-unfocused little gaze gradually shifts back and forth between her mothers, and she makes little happy grunts every now and again in response to their adoring words being poured over her.

After about their fifth turn each, it's back to Cady again. "Our little munchkin, look at you! Don't you look so sweet in your Christmas jammies, huh? Yeah, you do! Our pretty little sweet baby girl. Mama loves you so much."

They both gasp softly as Isla's little lips twitch and her face splits into her first-ever real smile.   Cady starts crying, and Janis feels a few tears slip down her cheeks too. "Look at that pretty smile!"

"That's a very good smile," Cady agrees tearfully. "Jay, she smiled at us."

"That she did," Janis agrees with a sniffle. She gently tickles under Isla's chin to see if she'll do it again, and they both giggle as she smiles at them again. "Yeah! Oh, we love that smile."

"So much," Cady hums. "We love that whole little smushy baby."

"Her first smile," Janis hums with one of her own.

"She's so beautiful," Cady sniffles. "Both of them are. I love them so much. I love you so much."

"I love you too," Janis echoes. She scoops the baby up higher and kisses her nose. "And you." She leans down carefully to kiss Jacob's cheek, causing him to give a little twitch in his sleep. Cady and Janis both giggle. "And you."

"Merry Christmas, my love," Cady says quietly. "Thank you for the best presents ever."

"Merry Christmas, baby," Janis replies. "And Merry Christmas, babies."

—————

tadaaaa i hope you enjoyed!!

tbh the only reason these two are twins is because i couldn't pick who i wanted to be older so i did a little fun thing with that lol. and also some of you may notice the babies did not in fact exit janis' vagina as i said in the last chapter of this series and the reason for that is i changed my gotdang mind. this'll probably be the last time we see these versions of them, at least for a while. it's been fun getting to play around so much with an au but we'll be back to your regularly scheduled cadnis in the new year (finally with picking teams again too aaah!) i also want to thank you all for being so patient with me this year. i'm painfully aware i haven't posted very much, but thank you all so much for all the love on what i have been able to put up. this year has been incredibly painful for me. people i'm close with have passed away, my works have been stolen, and my disability and mental health have gotten worse on top of it all. unfortunately that makes writing really hard, but seeing all your comments and hits and reactions have been the shining lights through it all. thank you <33 thank you all so much again for all your love and support this year. thanks for sticking with me :)) i hope your christmas was merry if you celebrate and if not i hope your day was amazing. see y'all in 2024 <3 lots of love, ezzy

[frenziedslashers]

I hope you get the switch issue sorted out and it just needs a new memory card or something :( I'd love HCs or a oneshot with Handsome Jack, maybe with a reader who's a medic who takes care of his scars and mask? SFW or NSFW or both, whatever you're feeling.

Thank you, I appreciate your support man. It is so far downloading Borderlands: The Pre-sequel alright. So I am crossing my fingers that it at least works at redownloading that game since I was working on a rerun with it and would hate to have to wait until I could get a new memory card to replay it 😭 thank you for the request too, though! I am absolutely living off the fact that there are still people on here who read borderlands stuff. I have really missed this fandom tbh <3

This may be pretty ooc for Handsome Jack. I never write for him, but I was in a fluffy sort of mood so I hope you enjoy Anon :)

Taking Care of Handsome Jack:

He never really let anyone touch him, before or after he became Handsome Jack. The thought of getting too close to someone and having them slip through his fingers like everyone else in his life hurt him, it really did. He just chose not to let anyone know that. I mean, he was supposed to be a feared man, showing any sign of weakness would surely get him demoted to Pandoras most feared, to Pandoras Softest Villain.

But there you were, sitting next to him on the floor of his home, a first aid kit strewn out on the floor before the both of you. "You know, I could tend to these wounds a lot better if you let me take you to my station and clean these with proper equipment. Unless scars are today's form of tattoo, it almost seems like it." You fussed while working away at bandaging up his arm.

"And let someone see that I'm not made of steel and that I bleed? Yeah, fat chance, princess." You rolled your eyes at the pet name. "Why do you trust that I won't tell the world that the all-great and powerful Jack bleeds blood like the rest of us?" You asked him, peeking up at him through your lashes with a small smirk before looking back down to tend to his wounds. "Oh, I just know you won't" he hummed, his other hand moving to rest on your thigh. "I feel like you get cockier each time I come here," "Call it confidence, dolly." He cooed with a snicker, though that quickly faded when you pressed on one of his cuts just right. A hiss left the man's lips, glaring over at you as you tried to hide a smile. "Sorry. "

He watched you for a few more moments until you leaned back, declaring your work finished as you looked over the mans body one last time. At least from what you could see of it. "Like what you see?" He asked you, and you rolled your eyes for what felt like the fiftieth time tonight. "I'm just checking over to make sure you didn't get shot anywhere else. Remember last time?" "God, don't remind me." He groaned.

Last time you did have to take him to your place of work. He had gotten shot in the back, literally, and hardly noticed until his adrenaline wore off. If it weren't for your second inspection and you seeing the blood he would have been a dead man. He never even said thank you for it, either.

"Well?" He asked, and you nodded your head. Eyes moving back up to meet his. Smiling softly back at him. "Looks good, handsome." You teased with a smirk. "Well then come here, gorgeous," he sniggered, pulling you closer to him by your hips. Moving you to rest over his lap. "Has anyone ever told you how hard to get you are?" You sighed, leaning forward a bit, "humor me." This wasn't the first time the two of you had done something like this. It started to become a common occurrence each time he called you to come to his house and patch him up. Some days you wondered if he was putting himself in the line of fire just so he could see you. You didn't think that much into it, though. The last thing you needed was the thought of Handsome Jack actually liking you for more than just your body and easy help. He was ruthless and cared about no one. At least that's what you were always told and assumed.

He sighed back, leaning forward to rest his chin on your chest, staring up at you with a smug expression. It was an awkward angle to stare back down at him, but it made you smile nonetheless. "I think that's what I like about you most." He hummed, "That and the fact that you save me about once a week, and god damn do you fuck really well." He partially joked and you groaned. There he went ruining the moment that you were starting to think was actually really sweet.

"Is that all I am? A toy?" You truly didn't care what the answer would be from the man, you were more so just playing along. But something behind his eyes told you that it struck a chord with him. His brows furrowing together. "Why the hell would you say that?" Well, that wasn't entirely the response you were expecting. Jack leaned back so the both of you were able to look at one another properly.

"Well, you only ever contact me when your bloody and bruised, and then we screw around, and I leave. Sorry, I was just playing around." You confessed, and he shook his head. "Have you ever thought about the fact that a call works both ways? You never call me, I call you for help because it's the only time you'll come and see me. I asked you to come over on three other occasions and each time you said you were busy. You only ever come if I'm dying, I can't believe you think so little of me." He spat, pushing you away from him. This wasn't like him, the sudden emotional change made your heartache. You felt horrible for making him upset. Then again, a part of you expected him to start laughing and point out the look on your face.

He wasn't lying though, he had asked you to come over three other times. Two of those times you assumed was just for sex, but the third time, thinking back on it now with the way he worded it. He did really just want to see you, even if he was drunk and you could tell.

"Jack, I don't think little of you," you tried to reassure him, and he scolded you. "Oh, yet you thought I was just using you as a fuck toy? Yeah, I enjoy it, but that's not who I am. I'm a lot of things, and I've done a lot of sick, idiotic things, but I'm not a user," he frowned, his eyes still focused on you. You could tell he was pissed, betrayed, hurt. You didn't know what you could do to make it up to him, and that's when you saw it. The blood dripping down his mask that made your chest clench in panic.

"Jack, did you hit your head today?" You asked all while leaning forward. "Oh, now you think I hit my head because I'm showing emotions? I'm not a fucking lunatic," he hissed, and you ignored him. Reaching out to touch the face of his mask. Pulling it back to show him the blood on your fingers. "Why are you bleeding from your head, Jack?" You asked with a stern expression. A bit upset he was ignoring the fact that he was still hurt.

"Oh shit," he muttered. Reaching up to touch the blood himself. Slight panic setting into himself. The last thing he needed was a concussion, or something worse. His head did hurt a little, but he didn't think it was that bad. "How many fingers am I holding up?" You asked while holding three fingers up for him. He pouted a bit, "Jack," you stated sternly. "Fine, three." "Good," you hummed, reaching into your bag for a light. "I'm going to shine my light on your eyes to make sure your pupils dilate properly, is that okay?" "Whatever you have to do, doc."

You completed the tests that you had to to make sure he was alright. Though you did suggest he take a concussion test, you knew he wouldn't. He was too stubborn to admit that he had one. Lucky for him you were sure it wasn't too severe if he did have one. "You call me if you start feeling worse, okay Jack?" He sighed as you mothered him. Closing his eyes while you worked on checking the wound through his thick hair. Minus the wound itself, he liked the feeling of you taking care of him. It made him feel normal in a sense. Like you were his loving partner, taking care of him after he got hurt at work, but he knew now that wouldn't be a thing. Or at least he assumed. You seemed to have higher expectations, or at least ones that weren't named Handsome Jack.

"Is it bad?" You shrugged. "Sort of? I suggest taking a shower before I stitch it up." You told him, moving some of his hair that fell onto his forehead. "Can you join me?" You frowned a bit, "Come on, just make sure I don't fall and die. Because if I die, I'm leaving you Hyperion as payback." He quipped, and you let out a groan. He knew you hated working for the place, let alone the thought of owning it. You were a medic, not a business person.

You knew that Jack was playing his games again. The moment the both of you got into the bathroom for him to take a shower he asked if you could join him in it. "As in without any clothes?" "I mean unless you want to shower with clothes on, what are you, crazy?" Jack asked with furrowed brows as he worked at removing his shirt. Turning around so his back was to you to allow you to remove your own clothes. Which did shock you a little. It did give you the chance to look over his back wound though. It was healing up nicely, just as you presumed.

"Alright," You hummed, opening the door so he could step in, you following after. Shutting the door behind the both of you.

The whole shower was quiet, besides the water that echoed in your ears. A nonstop stream that was almost comforting. His eyes were either on your face or the wall behind you the whole time while you helped him clean his hair and body. Giving you the opportunity to make sure he had no other marks hiding from you.

"Thank you," you froze up. God, you were sure you were wrong and this man had the worse concussion you had ever seen before. First, he practically told you he had feelings for you, and now he was thanking you? After nearly eight months of you helping him out like this? "You're welcome." You didn't question it, it was nice having him thank you for your service for once. You did practically do all of it for free. It was the least he could do, even if he was technically your boss.

It wasn't long before the both of you were exiting the shower. Drying off and changing. Jack had a spare set of clothes for you. Most of the time it was the clothes that you left behind, but this time it was clothes you had never seen before. "Are they your size? I picked them out myself. It's an apology for ripping your shirt last time." He told you with a smug grin. He was still proud of that, but you didn't even have the time to be mad at him. They were your size, and the fabric was the type that you liked and that didn't bother your skin. "Yeah, these are great, thank you, Jack." You smiled back at him, and he nodded. Pulling his shirt back over his head after tugging his pants up his legs.

"See, I'm not so unthoughtful, am I?" He asked with a brow raised, sitting on the edge of his bed while watching you head back into the other room after getting changed. He knew you were just grabbing your supplies to bring them in there. He trusted you, after all.

When you did come back, he scooted back so he was leaned back against the head board. Waiting for you to come over and attend to what you both hoped was his final wound. "So," you started as you dug out the supplies to patch up his scalp. "If I'm not a toy, what am I? Or... What are we?" You asked, glancing at his eyes before working on his head.

He was quiet for a while. Long enough that it had you worried, but each time you looked down at his face he was staring at you like he was thinking. Thinking long and hard about his next words. Really, he was praying that you would know without him having to say anything. "Truthfully, I don't even know." He told you, and you frowned a bit. There it was, you got your hopes up just a bit and you were brought back down.

"Well, I know what I want," Jack told you, a small laugh leaving his chest. "I always know what I want, it's what I'm best at. I want you. I want you by my side when I take down the Vault Hunters and open the Vault on Pandora." You stopped your work, staring at him with wide eyes. He had to be joking, right?

"What do you mean, by your side? Like as your medic?" You stammered a bit, pulling your hands away and Jack took this as a chance to grab your hands, pulling them close to him. A crazy glint in his eyes that worried you a little. "Well, that too, but as my partner. My other half. I want you as mine, and I really thought I made that damn clear with you being the only person I ever screw around with. I mean, I let you leave hickeys on me, you think I'd let just anyone do that?" He laughed, and you felt your insides turning. You were scared he was going to start laughing at you if you said you wanted all of that too, I mean. It wasn't like you didn't like him. You liked him quite a bit, actually. You always just pushed those feeling away.

"Are you making fun of me? This is a joke isn't it?" He could see the worry on your face, and it frustrated him. "What part of I like you do you not fucking understand?" He snapped, squeezing your hands a little tighter, and that made you flinch, your eyes and jaw squeezing shut. He regretted his actions, wishing he didn't let his anger get the best of him, but it was just who he was.

He released the grip on your hands. Letting them go completely so he could reach up to cup the sides of your face. "Look at me," he wanted to see your eyes. "Hey, look at me, please?" He asked, rubbing your cheek bones as he waited for your eyes to open. When they did finally flutter open he smiled. A smile that seemed almost too genuine for Handsome Jack. It scared you a little, really.

"Look, I'm sorry I yelled. I just don't understand why you can't trust me. I've been nothing but good to you, haven't I? If I did anything wrong, tell me now." He spoke, and you shook your head. "You didn't do anything wrong." He nodded his head, "Then what is it?" You stared back at him for a second while you thought of what you wanted to say. You didn't want to confuse or frustrate him any more than he already was. "I just don't get it." He furrowed his brows, "Everyone told me you were some heartless bastard who didn't care about no one. So I always just assumed you were using me. I never told anyone about me coming over to help us, or the time that we shared, but the rumors that people spread about them. I believed a lot of them." "Why?" He asked, looking a little wounded. "I guess I just never expected you to like a nobody like me." He sighed, pulling you close to him so he could wrap his arms around you. "Yeah, well I guess I'm just full of surprises." You shrugged, resting your head on his shoulder. "You really are, Jack." No one would believe you if you told them you were sleeping with Handsome Jack anyways, but you were glad to know you were hopefully the only one. If you could even believe him.

"I always just assumed you would want someone like Moxxi," "And have my heart broken again? No way, baby. Plus, you take better care of me, and you let me spoil you without having to flaunt it to the world." You smiled a little, he did spoil you. A lot more than you liked, actually. You always felt like he owed you back each time he would buy you the new supplies you needed and wanted for work or just the little things you wanted for yourself. No matter how much he assured you, you always wanted to pay him back somehow.

Your silence made him a little antsy, giving your hip a light squeeze. "Does this mean you'll be mine, and just mine?" He asked with a grin, and you smiled a bit back yourself. "Yeah, only if you let me make earlier up to you." You stated, beginning to place all of your appliances back into your bag while Jack settled down onto the bed. "Baby, when have I ever denied you?"

[tricky-pockets]

I feel a need to explain myself after a bunch of you called me a dumbass (affectionate) in the notes of the egg post (😐... 🥚), so may I present the thrilling sequel:

egg reasoning that made perfect sense at the time:

Of course I want to play male characters; I'm a girl all the time in real life.

Why not have a male persona? It's a great running joke and the harder I commit, the funnier it is.

Sure, I'm calling myself Jack and fucking my boyfriend's ass, but that's just because I'm kinky, okay? IT'S JUST A WEIRD SEX THING, DON'T READ INTO IT

I'm only more involved with masc social groups because a lot of those guys want to fuck and so do I.

I went as a wizard for halloween so many times as a kid because my dad did it once and he's the coolest 🧙‍♂️.

Look, there's no reason deodorant needs to be gendered at all, okay? When my ma said I smelled like a man, I only felt ecstatic about it because Fuck Gender Roles. I'm 15 and I'm being subversive, dammit!

Titties are mostly annoying unless I'm either (a) trying to attract some horny attention or (b) I have succeeded in that and someone's sucking on 'em. The super high impact sports bra is definitely more comfortable and convenient and cheaper than regular ones. And being able to take my titties off at will would be even better.

It's fun to make straight guys question their sexuality! See, if I look like this and they're still into me, that must mean I'm... very very sexy. Sexy enough to have gay thoughts about. Even though I'm a lady. I enjoy this a normal amount, for normal reasons!

It might? be fun to make straight women question their sexuality, but for some reason that's not as interesting to me. *shrug*

Everybody wishes they could switch their sex at will, even if they wouldn't do it very often. More options is always good, amirite? Like, don't you wish you could at least try it?

My feelings about fancy waistcoats are probably within spitting distance of normal; historical costuming is very cool.

Boymode (though I don't actually know that term yet) doesn't feel weird to me, but that is because I am a good actor. After all, look how good I am at performing Being A Lady. I have range.

And looking back, I have the same attitude as everyone in the notes: "Oh my god, you fucking himbo, HOW??"

I'll tell you how: I barely knew the word 'transgender' and had never (knowingly) met a trans person. If I'd been familiar with even ONE trans person's experience, I think I would have figured it out a decade sooner.

(That doesn't make the egg shit any less funny, though. Tbh, I could have been asking more questions and I just Did Not.)

[starlitangels]

Mundanely Magic

Winter is coming, y'all. I get (rather famously in my family) really noticeably down in the winter. I'm trying, this year, to actually enjoy it. Complain less about the snow and the cold and how early the darkness arrives. So I wrote this to try and remind myself that there are good parts of winter too 1.4k words

This could also be considered a quasi-sequel to Meeting the Family

—

"What do you miss?" Avior asked. We sat on the edge of the First Circle's cliff, looking down into the pit. Winds buffeted us on either side. I was trying to imagine the firelight spread out by the smoke was a sunset.

"Well, right now in this heat, I miss the place where I grew up," I said. Avior leaned back on his hands and gave me a curious look. "I'm not from Dahlia. I moved there to go to the academy. The night we ended up here... back home it would be cold and there would probably be snow on the ground. Dahlia's winters are too mild for that. But right now, I'm missing sitting in the bay window at the front of my parents' house, looking out at a gentle snowfall on a weekend. A mug of hot chocolate in my hand. Snow... sometimes suppresses sound. Some snowfalls after dark render the world so quiet. It's peaceful."

Avior stared into the middle distance. "Tell me about it? I've experienced snow, but not like that."

I took a deep breath and sighed. "When it's a quiet night snowfall, the snow sometimes reflects and disperses the light of street lamps and other artificial light. So it's not dark. The effect is called snowglow or skyglow. There's something mundanely magic about watching a fresh blanket of white cover everything. One time, we'd had a fresh snowfall overnight. When my mom drove me to school the next morning, the headlights of the car glittered off the undisturbed snow on the road like it was covered in diamonds.

"As winter progresses, the snow close to the road tends to get covered in the dirty water kicked up by car tires. Then it gets all grey and black and icky. Even the ten-foot-high piles of it in grocery store parking lots that are put there to try to clear the lot. But there's nothing like watching it come down fresh and pure and white and quiet on a night when you can just stay and watch through a window with a cozy blanket and a warm mug. Maybe some soft music playing in the background. Maybe someone putting up MoonBound solstice decorations in the other room.

"A lot of my neighbors growing up celebrated Christmas. Not all of them, but a lot. And they'd have Christmas lights strung up on the outside of their houses. And in those lights, you could see these big, fat, white snowflakes drifting slow and easy from the under-lit clouds hanging low in the sky.

"Sometimes snow falls fast and heavy and builds up on surfaces quickly. You look away to make lunch and the picnic table in the backyard went from an inch of snow to six.

"But the nights when it's falling slow and lazy... if you open the window you can hear the quiet chorus of each heavy flake joining its fellows on the surface of the world. It can be difficult to hear, but if you know what to listen for, it is audible.

"Couple all that with a nice mug of hot chocolate... maybe with a little bit of caramel... it's amazing."

Avior sighed. "It sounds beautiful," he said wistfully.

I nodded. "Maybe one day, when we get out of here, you can rift somewhere cold and experience it."

He leaned and nudged me in the shoulder with his arm. "I don't think I should. Because I'd need to bring my snow expert with me."

I laughed and shook my head. "You'd be fine. The only thing that's dangerous is driving in snow if you don't know how. You'd be totally fine on your own."

Avior met my gaze. "I'm serious. I'd rather take you with me. Someone familiar with the environment and whom I am familiar with..." His Adam's Apple bobbed. "You're my friend."

I pursed my lips in a half-smile. "Thanks, Avior. I... appreciate it."

He took a deep breath. "I wish I could make us both a peaceful snowfall. Unfortunately, I don't think even magic snow could survive the heat of this Hell."

I stared at the firelight I was pretending was a sunset. "Yeah, I doubt it. But it's okay. We'll find a way to get out of here, and then one day you can see it for real. With... with me." I cleared my throat and scratched the back of my head.

He hummed softly. "I'd like that," he said.

"Me... me too." I found myself believing that.

We'd been here for a month. Testy around one another. Suspicious. Guarded. Lowering our walls and our guards slowly. Settling into an uneasy truce. A tentative alliance, almost. This companionable, easy conversation was one of the first of its kind here.

I patted his shoulder. "One day, Avior. I promise."

He grinned. "I'm holding you to that."

"I believe you."

—

Three "Years" Later...

—

"Here you go," I said, handing the mug to Avior. He took it. I sat next to him in the bay window at my parents' house, looking out. He kissed the side of my head.

"Thank you, starlight," he said quietly.

Through the wall that separated the formal living room from the kitchen and casual living room—that we'd always called the family room—I could hear my mom playing quiet music, singing along as she hung the MoonBound solstice streamers. Long strings with silver crescent moons and stars hanging off them. My dad, being the only Sonal Energetic in a family of Freelancers, was the reason we tended to celebrate the MoonBound solstice more than the SunBound.

The reason I'd brought Avior home with me.

He took a sip, not seeming to notice that the hot chocolate was still hot enough to burn. I glanced over at him. In the reflection of his gold eyes, I could see the snow falling.

I leaned against his side and went back to watching the snow falling. He wrapped an arm around me. The bay window in the formal living room was barely big enough for two adults—especially when one was a demon, since demons tended to be taller than humans. But it was cozy to snuggle together.

The snowfall was the way I'd described it to him, all that time ago in Hell. Fat, slow flakes drifting lazily toward the ground. Light bouncing off the clouds and snow despite the sun going down hours ago. Rendering the world dimly lit. My parents' street was slowly turning white as the blanket built up on everything. The trashcans near the house already had little flat, white hats on top of the lids.

Avior peeked over his shoulder toward the archway that led back to where my mom was decorating. He smiled. "I'm glad I came with you."

"Just to see the snow? Or meet my family? Or...?" I tilted my head, trailing off the question as a prompt.

"All the above," Avior said. "I've never seen snow like this."

I smiled and leaned forward, unlocking the window latch. "Listen to it. So quiet you can hear the whispering of the flakes falling."

"Starlight, you'll let the heat out," he chided in a whisper.

"I'm only opening it for a few seconds." I pulled. The window released and slid on its track to one side. Avior immediately tilted his head so his ear was closest to the outside, eyebrows scrunched.

Before raising as a surprised smile replaced the curiosity. His gold eyes glittered in the reflection of the neighbor's Christmas lights and the obnoxiously orange streetlight a few houses down. His hand found mine and squeezed tight. "This is..." He shook his head. "I don't even know how to describe it."

I grinned and shut the window. "Mundanely magic?" I suggested.

His gaze met mine. "Exactly. That's what you said the first time you told me about this, right?"

I nodded. "Yep."

"What a perfect way to say it."

Through the archway, a loud beep almost made me leap. I took a large swig of my hot chocolate—burning my tongue—and handed my mug to Avior.

Right as my mom called my name. "Will you get the cookies out of the oven?"

"On it!" I replied, already moving toward the kitchen.

—

Tag list: @pinksparkl

[x-neurodivergent-reader]

💗 Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love! 💗

Oooh, thank you!

I'm going to include some headcanon lists here as well, since I don't really have five fics that I still love tbh - but here we go!

(I ended up going on some little tangents about why I like each fic, so it's all under the cut.)

Sealing the Void (Dhawan!Master x Autistic!Reader)

It's been a while since I've reread it (or any of my fics, for that matter), so I'm not sure how the writing holds up - but I've always seen this one as my best fic. Not only did it come from an emotional place for me, but the dynamic between a reader who loves cats, and the Master not caring for them, but being fond enough of the reader to put that aside, was fun to write! I'd still like to finish the sequel to this someday.

2. Adoration Equation (Loki x Autistic!Reader w/ Dyscalculia)

My final Loki fic, and a cute one to end on, if I do say so myself! It was neat to write Loki and the reader going on a mission together, and to show them already being in a fairly new relationship, where they still have some things to learn. Being a oneshot where the two discuss the reader's disability in one conversation, I feel like this fic uses a similar-ish concept to Learning From You, but does it a lot better.

3. Headcanons: Loki with an S/O who stims

Last I checked, this was my most popular piece of writing on this blog (until a certain Doctor Who one I'm also going to list at the end), and I can see why! I liked thinking about ways Loki would interact with a partner who stims in different ways (especially thinking about things specific to him, such as his Jotun form). It's just a nice, feel-good set of headcanons for anyone who stims, and likes the dark haired alien prince!

4. Headcanons: Dhawan!Master x Autistic!Reader with a special interest in urban exploration

This one combines two of my loves - The Master and urban exploration - to some fun results! I enjoyed writing my ideas for how the Master could be playful or annoying while visiting abandoned places with the reader, and how he would have a penchant for those with darker histories. I had a look through both these, and my similar headcanons for the 13th Doctor, and I have to say that the Master would be more fun to explore with!

5. Headcanons: 13th Doctor comforting a neurodivergent S/O

Since my other favourites only involved either Loki or the Master, I had a look to see if there were any 13th Doctor imagines I particularly like - and this one was quite sweet to read through! Considering her canon admittance to not being good at comforting people, I think the idea of the reader outright telling her how to help them, and her working with that, was the best approach. It was interesting to think of how her ability to help might change when given a specific idea of how to do it.

And now for an honourable mention, because why not?

6. Headcanons: 10th Doctor x Autistic!Reader established relationship

Despite the fact that this isn't one I've seen as being particularly special, it's the piece of writing on my blog with the most notes. It might only be because it involves the 10th Doctor. Or it might be because it genuinely is pretty cute! After reading through it again, I think it does deserve to be on this list.

My writing skills are rusty as hell right now, so I think these are all worth reading, until I start improving again.

Thanks again for sending this to me!

[pentupfortoolong]

Hard Work

(OK, first caption story. Still working on the Cos-played sequel series, but might do one or two more originals before that.

I'm sorry if this isn't overly sexually explicit, but I'm still hoping you enjoy the transformation journey anyway.)

Riley sighed, for what was probably the hundredth time that day. Work was over for the week, so he headed to the local bar.

The job itself wasn't overly taxing, more-so the thought that things hadn't progressed the way he had hoped. "Get a mail-room job, they said. Work your way up quickly, they said." Well, it had been close to a year and he was still there. He couldn't afford college, so he thought making his way in the working world would be the way to go. Was it supposed to take this long? Was he bad at sorting mail? Was he just that nondescript? He thought about it often. And his thoughts often led to one conclusion: Until he met the boss and got her to remember his name, he was always going to be one among many lower-level employees who wouldn't get a chance to work their way up the ladder. He may only have been twenty, but he was eager and hungry to prove himself as soon as he could.

But since the boss didn't exactly make daily- or even weekly- visits down to the mail-room, he couldn't exactly strike up a conversation and find common ground. The people he DID see every day didn't help, either. They knew she wasn't much for talking. She wasn't nasty per se, but kind of… despondent. Like even with her money and status, she was still missing something. Nobody knew if she had a spouse because she only made token appearances at special events. And nobody had ever been in her house, since all functions were at the work place. If it weren't for the fact that she showed up and still did her job with the utmost professionalism, the employees would swear she was a recluse.

*** "Something on your mind?" Riley was shaken from his thoughts. The attractive bartender was looking right at Riley. She seemed really focused on him, something that unnerved Riley a little.

"Uh, sorry?" "You're deep in thought there, champ. Everything OK?" "Yeah, don't worry about me." "Hey, things are slow now, I can take a minute to talk. So, what's all the hubbub, bub?" "I can promise you now, it's not original." The bartender shrugged. "Means there's more of a chance I might be able to help."

She extended her hand. "I'm Ace." "Riley" "Now Riley, what's got you down?" "Well… I've been at my job for almost a year. Like, being one in a group of new hires, I knew I wouldn't be a priority once I started. But after all this time… I'm getting nowhere. And it's not like I can get in my boss' good graces, I've never even met her. Got hired by one of her go-to guys and that's about it. The best I can say is I've seen her a couple times in passing." "So you're wondering what you can do to prove yourself to your boss? To give her something she needs, something you think you can provide?" "Damn Ace, you're a quick study." "Riley, what if I told you I could definitely get you where you need to be?" "How do you mean?" "Exactly what I said. I can get you what you want, and in turn, get you what your boss wants?" "I'd say that's a lot to offer a guy you've just met. I mean, no offense, and I am very grateful you're even saying that, but why invest your time in a small-timer like me?" "Well first of all, if you want to be a big-timer, you have to NOT think of yourself like that. Second, because helping you is no big thing for me." "Really?" Ace put both her hands in his shoulders. "Really really." And after only a minute, she took her hands off his shoulders and snapped her fingers.

*** Riley's vision was blurred, not helped by the brightness of the room light. "Ugh, I must have drunk more than I thought. I don't even remember getting home… wait, this isn't my home." Riley tried to stand up, but kept falling. After a few tries, he was on his… high-heeled feet? "Oh no, did someone bring me home and put me in these heels as a joke?"

Riley looked around. He was in what looked like an office. A huge bookshelf, filled to the brim. Expensive but gorgeous art pieces (some of them a bit more erotic than he had ever seen). A large ivory desk was in near the window, seemingly polished fairly recently. All he saw on it was a vase with a single red rose, a laptop and a glass with a little water at the bottom. Riley's eyes then spotted a full sized mirror on the door of the (rather spacious) walk in closet. Riley's eyes then widened. Riley did not recognize himself. Instead of seeing a professional looking young man with brown hair, he saw a tall, black-haired woman in a black dress, with red nails and lips to compliment the look. "OK, this is the weirdest dream I've had while drinki-NGGG!"

Riley fell to the floor again. And after the pain from falling on his knee had subsided, he realized two things: He had fallen because he wasn't used to heels, since he was actually completely sober. And this wasn't a dream.

"Holy shit, how could this happen?! Men don't just become women out of nowhere!" He found what he assumed was the purse of the woman whose body he was in. He went through it to find clues to figure out where to go from there. He found mints, tissues, keys, until finally grabbing a license. "Riley Reynolds? But… but that's my name!" Riley was no closer to working out what exactly was going on, but his new theory was that he had somehow ended up in the body of a woman whose name matched his. "OK, clearly something strange is happening… maybe I need to find my old body? Like, maybe it's a "name's the same, bodyswap to see if the grass is greener on the other side" type of deal."

But Riley couldn't even remember making that kind of thing. Hell, how could he, up until now he didn't even suspect magic was a thing in his world. He'd often WANTED it to be real when he was younger, but he never expected to have been right all along. He looked at the license again for more details. "44, F… Oh geez, this license is from Oregon! I've got to make a trek back up to Washington if I'm going to find me!" Riley decided to look through the rest of the purse while using the bathroom. A chance to sit down and freshen up.

He left the office and looked down the hallway. There were a few doors to try, but as luck would have it, the bathroom was the very next door on the left. Riley stood in front of the toilet bowl, forgetting for a second whose body he was in… Until he saw the penis on that body. He was shocked for a minute before going "OK, this Riley is transgender. Alright, good to know, no big deal." Riley wasn't upset with this development, just didn't know what to expect. After freshening up, Riley went through the rest of the purse. Nothing else useful, except a phone. "Phew! Maybe I can call my phone and explain this to the other Riley, however crazy this may be!" Riley was thanking his lucky stars he had his number memorized (in case he could finally give it to his boss), so he typed it in and placed the call. After four rings, someone answered. But it wasn't his own voice, it was a woman he never recalled hearing the voice of. "Hello?" "H-hello? I'm trying to get in touch with Riley, is Riley there?" "I'm sorry, I think you have the wrong number." Riley recited the number, to be one-hundred percent certain. "The number is right, but I'm not Riley, sorry. If this Riley is a guy, I think he's ghosted you. Sorry about that! Have a good night!" The phone clicked.

Riley went back to the office, and sat down in the chair, trying to work out what to do next. It was only now that Riley realized that he not only didn't even know who he was now, but he didn't even know if THIS Riley owned the house he was in, or if he was placed here at random. He wouldn't be able to focus on a new plan for much longer, because when he looked out the window from the second story, he saw a car pull up. Observing further, he noticed that the garage door opened automatically, which Riley took to mean that the owner of the house was home. "Oh shit, how do I explain this?!" Riley thought he'd sound crazy if he tried to explain, and he didn't know how fast he could move in this body, so he decided to hide.

There were only two options: in the closet or under the desk. He thought about the closet, but depending on the owner, they might notice something amiss, or decide this was the night to sort through their belongings. As risky as it was, the desk it had to be. He would just have to contort and stay quiet whenever possible. He turned off the phone in case it went off, shut the light off and crawled under the desk. He crossed his fingers to hope that if the owner was going to be in here, it would be a mercifully short stay. ***

Riley didn't know how much time had passed, but eventually the light was switched on. Riley panicked a little, but made no noise. He tried to trace the movements of the figure moving around the room. At one point, they went to the bookcase, so Riley took a chance to find out if they knew anything of the mystery person. He saw a blonde woman in heels, fishnets and a leopard top. Even just from the back he knew the identity of the mystery woman. "My boss lives here?!"

His mouth was agape, but he didn't voice his last thought out loud. He ducked back under the desk. He was now wondering how THIS development fit in. "Is my boss responsible for this? Does she know people who can magic up new bodies?"

Riley wasn't able to think for much longer on this, since his boss had just sat down. He heard a loud sigh, like she was getting comfortable. Then he heard a phone ring. His boss answered. "Hello? Yes, this is Kylie Penders. Oh right, I'll have an answer for you in the next day or so, I'm waiting to hear back from her. OK, thank you and good night." Kylie hung the phone up and turned the laptop on. It wasn't long before she was online, trying to look forward to a relaxing weekend ahead.

Riley was trying his best to be silent. But a sudden sneeze overtook him. A loud one. And he couldn't cover his mouth. Kylie hit her knee, cursing to herself before getting her phone ready as she looked under the desk. Riley stuttered. "I-I-I" "Oh honey, there you are! You must have gotten back from your trip early and wanted to surprise me!" Riley looked puzzled. Kylie grinned as she looked the situation "Why Miss Reynolds, I didn't think you'd be into this! Though I guess I should know better by now, huh?" And with that, Kylie shut the blinds and removed everything except her leopard top. Then Riley saw the penis size on Kylie. Riley gasped again. From up above, Kylie said "Don't be shy, I know why you're under there! You want me to relax after work, so thoughtful!" Riley took another look, and the next thought that snapped into place came easier than he ever could have expected. Riley started sucking Kylie's cock. Riley had never had anything remotely sexual with anyone else, yet somehow, it was like they knew their way around. Kylie was definitely enjoying herself as Riley kept sucking. And as Riley kept pleasuring Kylie, all these flashes started occurring. Memories of a life Riley had both lived and not lived at the same time. Except for being born in the 80's instead of the turn of the millennium (and his birth name now being Jacob), being an awkward outsider who wanted to make a name for themselves was still par for the course. But then there was the coming out, the social transitioning, starting HRT… And not long after is when she met Kylie. Except now, they had been dating for months. And Riley was able to bring Kylie out of her shell a little more, which made her happier. Even after all the memories fell into place, Riley kept on sucking. After all, she had a gorgeous girlfriend with a big cock, why not please her after a hard week's work?

Riley's mouth filled with cum and she let out a satisfied sigh, as did Kylie. Kylie looked down at Riley, satisfaction on both their faces. "If these are the kinds of surprises you bring, I'm hoping they'll come up more frequently." "Oh, there'll be cum alright…" Riley said as she winked, before getting a finger and wiping the cum off her chin and licking it off, eyes closed like she was imagining sucking Kylie's dick again.

Kylie giggled before saying "You still hungry, babe? I could order in Chinese if you haven't eaten." "Sounds great, hot stuff! I'll clean up and meet you downstairs!" Kylie walked away, a little spring in her step. Riley's phone went off, which was strange to Riley because she had sworn she had turned it off. It was a voice message

"Hi Riley! I told you I could get you both what you wanted. And deep down, you knew this is the life you wanted, just like your boss wanted a girlfriend who's had similar life experiences to her. Don't worry about your old life, I just did a light reshuffle on reality and time, and put you where you wanted to be. You're still you, just with... well, new adventures, shall we say. It might take a little getting used to with the mixing of memories, but nothing too difficult. So this is your pal Ace signing off and saying have fun!"

Riley smiled, remembering that too. She also had to remember to give Ace a huge tip when she saw her next. And Riley sauntered down to join her lovely girlfriend for some quality time together.

[crazydreamercycle]

Random musings on what I'd do if, in a world where the 2012 seasons didn't exist, I was asked to plot the MCoG sequel

No romance, at any point

I would have expended on the theme that started to be set up in S1 with the Great Heritage of the Cities of Gold being there to preserve Muan technology and energy sources, as they can both cause great destruction and greatly improve quality of life, and have the kids end up with a very powerful and dangerous artifact which could either save or kill thousands, while they debate if they should give it to someone, and if yes, to whom

Maybe some expansion on Mu's history, both good and bad - it's an Empire, after all. But also Tao deserves to know more about the history of his culture

Maybe some of that with Atlantis too?

Of course, Mendoza, Sancho and Pedro have to be in here (I mean, they don't actually have to, I can honestly see a possibility where they're not, but I like Mendoza too much not to include him) but the kids don't deliberately go fetch them in Barcelona. Rather, they had their own wacky adventures while trying to go back to Spain, possibly lost the gold somehow, and run into the kids by coincidence partway through S2 and they team up again, possibly with more of an on-and-off thing to it than in S1 so as not to undo the kids gaining more independence/coming of age thing at the end of S1

Hey, remember how Sancho and Pedro wanted to betray the kids at the end of S1 but Mendoza betrayed them and threatened to kill them if they didn't help out? What if this had consequences on the narrative and group dynamics???

Mendoza's continued character arc: he has the kids as essentially morality pets but is still kind of a terrible person on the side and mostly in it for the gold. His arc now is to be a better person to people who aren't the kids (while still being a lying little scoundrel, of course). That, or the kids deliberately use the fact that they know he won't hurt them/let them be hurt to manipulate him or deliberately thwart one of his plans, and it causes conflict. Or both. Both is good, too. There are multiple seasons. there's time

Arson is committed at least once per season

if I have to bring back one of Esteban's parents it'd be his mom. After all, we only know she's dead through Mayucca's tale, which he himself admits might not be true. Just because the part of it about his father was right doesn't mean the part about his mother dying was

I'm gonna be honest, I don't have the knowledge to pull that off and the execs wouldn't let me, but. Exploration, or even just representation, or gender and sexuality in Native cultures beyond the western binary and heteronormativity (since it's like, a fact that colonization fucked that up and that the western concept was most definitely not universal)

Zia gets to still be angry, tho I'm not entirely sure what her arc would be (and probably am not the best person to decide that. Presumably I'd have a team and I could find someone who is more qualified than I am in the matter tho. Same for n°10, tho I really don't think I'd be allowed to to it)

You know these weird rooms in S1? The ones with like, glowing red tiles on the walls? At least one of these per season. They never get explained

Of course, that is not to say that this would be the only way to make a good sequel, or even the only sequel to S1 I'd enjoy (or even that I'd do a good job if I actually had to direct a sequel, I probably wouldn't). As I said, it's just a random reflection I thought I'd share on where I'd personally take things, and I'd actually be curious to know where others would have gone, disregarding S2+.

[sunshine304]

Fanbinding: Three Oneshots with Chain stitch and Hot Foil

When I first tried fanbinding, I messed up the cases and had to redo them. That was a learning experience. XD But I didn't throw the botched cases away because I figured I might be able to use them for something one day, even if it was just to try out some stuff.

And I found a use for them! I'd wanted to try out a chain stitch tutorial I'd seen on SeaLemon's youtube channel for a thin book with just one signature and a nice stitch pattern on the spine. And when I got a set of hot foil pens, I decided that this was the perfect opportunity to not just test that chain stitch but to also try for some hot foil titles!

Behold!

The fics are:

"Such a Warm Commotion" by @whetherwoman. A Fire Island fic.

"You, Asleep and Dreaming" by @megafaunatic (etymologyplayground). A The Untamed/MDZS fic.

"Something to Talk About" by @ziusik (vesna). A The Untamed/MDZS fic.

You can find all the links to the fics and the SeaLemon video in the notes!

Lots of pictures under the cut!

I struggled some with the sewing because I'd decided in my infinite wisdom that I wanted to use two threads instead of just one because I thought it look nicer. And it does look nice! But oh boy, do two threads cause some problems, like unexpected knots, wrapping around each other all the time etc. Still, I'm pleased with how it turned out!

I really enjoyed keeping up the New York theme for this Fire Island fic (highly recommended, awesome sequel to the movie!). Also, of course there needed to be rainbow colours! XD

I forgot to use initials for the beginning of the text in all three books, because I did the typesetting quite quickly and simply didn't remember to do something about it as I'd been fiddling around with the graphics for a while. XD Ah well, next time.

For etymologyplayground's fic, the hot foil doesn't stand out as clearly when the light doesn't hit it right. I don't know whether this is because of the ligh-tcoloured linen or because the foil wasn't exactly the best quality. Still, when the light hits it just right, it looks really cool!

The insides of the case don't always match perfectly to the rest of the colour design, but that's because I chose some papers that were either leftovers from other projects or ones from the thick design paper blocks I've got. It's serviceable.

I like how the design turned out otherwise here, with the illustration that I actually repeated at the end of the book, though I'm too lazy to take another picture. XD

I'm very pleased with the design of this one! The gold foil fits the cover so well (and I mean, I love that paper so much, anyway).

I like how Changyang's art works for the story that starts with WangXian travelling, and how the lotus picture illustrates the ending set in Yunmeng. I used a photography and send it through a hundred filters in PS. XD

Overall, I'm very pleased with how these books turned out, improvised though they were. I could try some new things and am so happy about the foil pens! So many more possibilities for making cover designs! I do have a few ideas already, but we'll see.

[magpiefngrl]

Hellooo! 💕

Sorry to slide in like this, you absolutely don't have to answer this, I just have no idea how else to grab your attention 😫

Your drarry fic series 'Arthur and the Lust Leaks' is seriously one of my all time favourites, they're just so hilarious! I love the dynamic between Daphne and Draco, Arthur (of course!🐣) and the general concept is just wonderful on its own XD

The concept of magic folk getting "Lust Leaks" when they're extremely horny is actually GENIUS!! Like what, how on earth did you come up with such a clever idea!?!?

My question is how would you feel about others using the concept? So long as you're credited for the inspiration, of course!

Thank you! You're brilliant!!💖

Oh what a lovely ask! I'm so glad you like the concept and thrilled you enjoy the 2 fics! I had a ball writing Daphne and Draco and ofc Arthur is adorable <3

How I came up with the Lust Leaks. When I joined the DTH fest, I'd only published one drarry fic that I'd written non-stop and obsessively over a few weeks; a fic which had poured out of me in a torrent. With The Full Monty I was more deliberate. I had a prompt, which gave me a direction to follow, but I wanted to do more. Now, my favourite author is Astolat and one of the things I love about her work is that she always has some cool magical element in her stories. I'm a fantasy author at heart, and her inventiveness and worldbuilding truly resonates with me. So, with this new drarry fic of mine, I wanted to create a magical element that would be new and interesting and would fit with canon.

I thought of developmental stages for children. How magical kids' magic appears when they're young. I can't remember the exact age it's supposed to happen, but in my mind it was linked to the stage where kids develop ego (around age three) (ego meaning the psychological theory, not selfishness). And then I thought what's another big stage of development (adolescence, lots of hormones) and what happens then? (sexual maturity). And what if, during that tumultuous time of their life, their magic goes haywire too?

I can't remember if I came up with the concept first and used it in the story or if I came up with something embarrassing happening to Draco and decided to dig into that idea and develop it. Either way, it went: idolise astolat-> magic appears when toddlers turn into children -> adolescents have raging hormones and this could affect their magic-> lust leaks when horny.

I wanted to write more in that 'verse myself. Back in spring 2017, I'd started writing a Lust Leaks Hogwarts-era fic inspired by a throwaway line in the fic about Blaise and how everything he touched grew wings and flew. I also began a sequel of the Full Monty with the title Saving Arthur. But I had a few big fests coming up and a birthday fic to write, and they got abandoned.

Finally, to answer your question: If you wish to use the concept in your fanfiction, then I'd be happy for you to do so. The credit would be much appreciated, and perhaps even a link to Full Monty for anyone curious to see the origin? That'd be brilliant.

However, this is only for fanfiction. If you're interested in using the concept for original fiction or any kind of work commercially available, then my answer is no. But I'm assuming you want to write drarry/ HP fic :)

This was a fun trip down memory lane. Thank you for sending the ask, for your very kind compliments, and I hope you enjoy playing with my lil' idea xx