#and i don't even want to read anymore
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It's midnight and I should be asleep but instead I'm thinking about how I haven't read a book for fun since high school and I don't think I know how to digest a novel anymore. I haven't been in high school for four years now.
I used to be The Bookish One (TM). I remember reading a full novel in a day (it wasn't very good but I didn't know that when I got it). A book I bought ages ago because it seemed interesting is still sitting on a shelf in my room and has never been opened. What happened to me... What happened to me who the fuck am I anymore
#delete later#and i don't even want to read anymore#it probably doesn't help that i started associating reading with parental pressure once the fourth book of a series i used to like came out#and my mother was like 'you NEED to read it its so good' but i had classes and stuff and was overwhelmed#but now i have time and#i still dont#and who even am i#i was reading narnia at 5#but at 22 i cant even hop on ao3 and read fic (tbf that's also bc I don't really have any specific fandoms right now)#who would have thought feeling bad for not entirely understanding an animatic you sent a friend several weeks ago#would lead to an identity crisis#i need a hug#and sleep#but i don't have anyone irl to hug me#and i csnt relax enough to sleep#fuck im crying now because of this#can someone knock me out#what is WRONG with me#im so broken and fucked up and pathetic#i wanna sleep so bad#but i cant stop thinking#i dont know what to do#i guess ill just. idk. keep lying down and feeling like shit
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It's always, like, mildly annoying when people see a het trans couple and go "all that work just to be straight?" like... one, you don't know if they're straight and two, trans people don't owe you a queer sexuality to "make up" for the fact we're trans. Transhet people aren't a subtype of trans people, they're members of the trans community, and the queer one if they so desire!
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#and i don't really vibe with the word microaggression but it's very that#like it just comes across like people think trans folks owe them queerness and cabaret preformances y'know?#and we cannot *be* if it means the way we are being isn't this carefully curated version people have of transness + queerness#and it can kind of warp your desires and understanding of yourself because you *want* community and to be seen and to be allowed to just be#this isn't universal and the 'you' is impersonal. i am aware this is a broad range of experiences and not everybody can/does relate#my overall point is that it's probably not the best move to act like this toward trans people#maybe i read too much into this but it's just something i have seen over and over and over and over . . . again#shoutout to the real ones (heterosexual and/or straight trans people or people in straight-presenting relationships 👍)#back to playing the lelda of zelda (is it bad that i don't even call her zelda anymore i just go 'THERES LELDA!!!')#it sounds wrong to call her zelda now 😭#the LEG OF ZEG. SWORD SKORD???? BREATH OF THE WEATH!! -my brain 24/7/365
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Worst feeling ever is when you go to reread a fic you really like and find out it's been deleted. Even WORSE worst feeling ever is checking the author's profile and finding out they've deleted all of their fics entirely
#NO!! NO!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!#Collapses to my knees how could this happen...why...#😭😭😭#This is the exact reason why I never delete any of my fics#I just orphan them if I don't want to be associated with them anymore. That way people can still at least READ them#If they want to#AO3 authors please please PLEASE never delete just orphan that way your username gets detached#And nobody will know you wrote it but it's still THERE#Crying screaming throwing up.#At the very least I saved one (1) of their fics. Idk I had a psychic sense and went 'I should save this one'#And thank GOD I did. Aghh#Wayback Machine doesn't even have any records...I'm going to cry#Lies down#I'll miss them forever and ever. They'll probably never know but I want them to know this.#Shima speaks
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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Hey sorry, the KSBD Girls have been turned into cutesy anime girls. Yes, they are chibs now. Yes, their eyes are massive. No, the process is irreversible. We are very sorry, nothing can be done about it anymore.
"Don't look at me"
#My art#KSBD#K6BD#Kill Six Billion Demons#Yes I accidentally gave White Chain an extra pair of wings#Pay no attention to that#Originally wanted to draw The Girls as they appear in *each* book but. That was going to be Too Many Chibs#So this is like Book 1 and/or 2 (Cio's outfit is from Wielder of Names)#(Allison's is from the end of Book 1 and White Chain... Book 1?)#(I drew these forever ago I can't remember anymore man)#Anyways read KSDB it is Very Good#Definitely one of those comics that has just ruined my life because I am never going to experience anything quite like it again#I don't even know where to start just go fucking read it man
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Hazbin Hotel Incorrect Quotes
Angel: *sliding money across the bar to pay for his drinks* You can call me sugar daddy longlegs
Husk: no
Niffty: Does that make Husk sugar baby shortlegs?
Husk: No
Niffty: Can I be sugar baby shortlegs?
Husk: NO
Angel: *wheeze*
#I'm just doing dialogue now I don't even care anymore#this is me pushing the sugar daddy Angel sugar baby Husk agenda btw#like hear me out for a second#Angel hates when people he genuinely likes spend money on him because he doesn't want it to feel like they're buying him#Husk who is usually the one paying for dates in relationships is SO confused by this treatment#it takes him a second to learn that he kinda loves it#and Angel would buy Husk so many presents that someone (probably Cherri) jokes about Angel being a sugar daddy#Angel thinks this is hilarious and Husk is just learning to roll with things now#but yeah I have reasons to think this ither than it just being funny (which is usually how I come up with things)#y'all that could've been a whole other post tf#why are these the tags#please read these tags guys#incorrect quotes#hazbin hotel#angel dust hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel incorrect quotes#husk hazbin hotel#niffty hazbin hotel#huskerdust#Angel treats Husk like a princess in the streets Husk treats Angel like a princess in the sheets
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sigh feeling nostalgic for my old fics/the old community these days. I miss it man.
#this post is brought to you by the fact that I've been rereading world forgetting the past few days#I've reread parts of it plenty of times#but I haven't actually reread the fic in full... since I wrote it maybe?#does that even count as reading it#it's a fundamentally different experience I think so#anyway I miss having that level of brainrot...#I cringe so much at a lot of the stuff in that fic#but man there were so many great moments#ngl as my 'big fic' i'm most unhappy with I do sometimes think about rewriting some of it#not that theres much of an audience for it anymore#but also that would take too much time and I wouldn't have the patience for it#plus I don't even know how I'd fix it theres so much wrong structurally#it would have to be so much longer which is the opposite of what I'd want for it#I literally am way too busy for that anyway so#ramblings
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i am not usually interested in dramatically canon-divergent scenarios because the canon story is what compels me, but i've been obsessed with this moment ever since i re-heard it during my second viewing. from the perspective of someone who already finished the story once and now knows the truth - this was wild.
WHAT IF?
#naruto#naruto manga#pan watches naruto#team ro#WHAT was itachi thinking#i mean it's clear that he makes this 'change of plan' because he's taken aback/alarmed by how much kakashi knows#and my assumption is he wants to find out where kakashi got this intel#but for real WHAT was his long-term plan?#it is no secret that i am obsessed with the kakashi-itachi dynamic and like. this is just wild to me#especially given the timing - hiruzen just died so like. does itachi even have a contact in the village anymore?#is it *danzo*? seems nuts but.#if it is then this plan is insane. danzo doesn't love kakashi but he does respect him highly as a shinobi/an asset to the village#and i absolutely do not think he'd be willing to let itachi sacrifice a piece that powerful#was itachi just going to keep quiet about this if/when the Leaf asked where their most renowned jonin went? was he going to LIE about it?#or does the fact that hiruzen is dead mean that itachi *doesn't* have a contact in the village he trusts anymore#(hence him showing up immediately after hiruzen dies just to remind the Other Three that he's still out there)#except he didn't expect kakashi to sniff him out INSTANTLY and now he's taking him captive because...???#i don't know why#to torture him until he reveals his intel source and then kill him?#except itachi DOESN'T want to kill kakashi. that's established.#'why not just kill me? if he wanted to...he could.'#that's canon and it's GREAT and i love looking back at that very early line from much later on#knowing it's one of the pieces that clicks into place for kakashi when he's considering whether or not madara's story could be true#but anyway. itachi DOESN'T want to kill kakashi.#but if he takes him captive and doesn't want to kill him - then what???#there aren't any good answers for this because honestly i don't know that itachi's entire backstory had been planned yet#(like i think i read somewhere that kishimoto knew itachi was technically on the villlage's side from the beginning)#(but i'm not sure if all the details had been established)#in any case i remain FASCINATED
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call me crazy and controversial but I don't think nancy did anything wrong, nor is she fundamentally a bad person for what happened to barb in s1, and I absolutely do not think she needs to be redeemed. the end of her character arc should always be about reaching a point of self-compassion and forgiveness—specifically by healing enough to allow herself to move past her guilt and belief that she caused barbs death by letting herself become close to others and form intimate friendships. especially with robin (who imo she was cagey with in s4 because of her trauma around barb)
#stranger things#nancy wheeler#ronance#kind of#redemption arca are for people who djd something weing and nancy wheeler did nothing wrong#she was a bratty 16 year old who wanted to lose her virginity to a hot guy and ignored her friend for one night#and saying nancy needs to redeem herself from that is fucking crazy to me#barbs death was very much not her fault and the implication that she needs to atone for that is crazy to me#like did we watch the same show?#she has major survivors guilt! and the false belief that she caused barbs death#(I don't even like nancy that much but jesus I dislike interpretations of her character where#she needs to ‘‘choose’’ robin in order to redeem herself for not ‘‘choosing’’ barb#not even romantically because ronance in this particular scenario can be read both ways#what she really needs to do is allow robin to choose her! because she doesn't let people in anymore! because she HAS SURVIVORS GUILT!)
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i spent quite a bit of time thinking, considering my options and wondering if i should even respond to the 'apology' to begin with, but i feel like i've been here before, in this exact same position (i didn't respond to his original 'apology' because it felt off how he omitted the fact that he pretended to be the victim for a whole week, but even then i decided to not say anything and just let the dust settle and give him a chance to learn and do better) and doing nothing eventually just caused more harm. even if i can't reach the other side and find common understanding, i wanted to at least express what's been on my mind for such a long time.
i always try to approach people and situations with understanding and try to assume ignorance instead of malice when someone says or does something i consider questionable or wrong. but i also know we all have our limits. we are all human. and you can't take the heart out of the equation.
one thing in this 'apology' that really stood out to me was this:
how is it not malice to completely disregard another creator, hell, another person and their wishes and feelings when they have made it very clear that your actions are causing them harm?
how is it not malice to outright lie and misrepresent other people and situations in order to portray yourself in a better light?
how is it not malice to disrespect the people you've stolen from and then, after they (by your own words!) rightfully address it and try to bring your actions to light, you then turn around and vilify them to your friends and followers? portray them as bullies and gatekeepers?
all while repeating again and again how the whole experience made you stop creating? as if your actions didn't force people out of this space, this fandom? have you ever sat down to think how the person that made you a 40 minute video tutorial on gif making, the person that taught you so much, no longer makes anything at all because you turned your back on her and copied her sets? kept doing it after she blocked you? after she made text posts expressing how upsetting your behaviour was? you didn't care and kept doing it anyway. even saying things like 'i always credit where credit is due' in response to copying numerous sets from @minthara, down to the caption without ever crediting her.
and if that wasn't enough harm, you then took it a notch further and straight up lied to the people around you, trying to vilify petra and i by saying how the whole thing should've been dealt with in private. how is it not malice to omit the fact that I DID, in fact, reach out to you privately. that i did it in a civil manner. that i tried to explain to you how your actions were wrong and were rightfully upsetting other creators. how you ignored everything i've said and when i expressed that your response (or lack of it) made me uncomfortable and that because of it i couldn't give you permission to 'recreate' (copy) my work, you then insulted me and told me that it didn't matter what i wanted? that you would do as you please and there was nothing i could do about it? how you then immediately blocked me so i couldn't even respond? how is that not malice?
and then this was from your apology back in march:
and you insist that after this 'apology' you've learnt and were never doing anything wrong again and yet you are saying the same thing again in your new 'apology'. how after the march events you went to @galedekarios anyway, asking for permission, didn't wait for her response and posted your copy of her set anyway. which just makes me think that you've never learnt. it just makes it seem that asking people for permission never stemmed from a place of respect and understanding, but from the need to cover your ass in case someone brings the fact that you're still copying up. which someone did, apparently.
at the end of the day, this is my opinion and i might be wrong, but following all of your words and actions, it just seems like you chose notes and attention instead of people. that you kept lying and misrepresenting things and throwing us under the bus for your own gain. and that you only stopped because enough people eventually found out, not because you suddenly felt remorse. and this 'apology' was just another 'ask for permission from a creator', all just for optics. you couldn't even bother to unblock us before posting the 'apology' which just shows how little you were actually thinking about any of us.
#gah there's honestly a lot i could add but...#i feel like i've said enough to get at least some of this off my chest#i'm not even going to go into detail how he'd ask for my presets and use my tracked tag in every single one of his gif posts#all while pretty much never reblogging from me#and i know that other creators expressed the same sentiment#just weird.. you want to be part of a community but then you only take and take and take and never give back#and then complain that you feel unwelcome#and if anyone reading this even thinks 'omg so you can't get inspired by other people's work? ? ?? ? ????' for one second like#this ain't about it#there's a difference between getting inspired by someone and just endlessly remaking other people's work#and i'm tired of even having to explain it again and again#i genuinely am just tired.. i've been tired for a while#i feel like all these waves just killed my excitement and drive to be part of a community to try and bring people and creators together#i don't even want to make anything anymore because it feels like the whole community was just ripped apart#all after i've spent months trying to bring people together encouraging them to interact and support one another but then this happens#and keeps happening and what's the point anymore
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I hate and love that my comic scratches the ultimate itch of the sort of narrative I want to consume because on the one hand, I love working on it and it is fully my Essence. But on the other hand, when I want to unwind and am craving a particular Type Of Story only to remember that it doesn't exist I'm just like......do I gotta do everything myself?
#it's not even that gtw is like.....particularly original#I guess melville just Won at the setting and everyone else was like 'okay we don't gotta do anymore'#that's why I read whaling journals IT IS ALL THAT WILL PARTIALLY SCRATCH THE ITCH#that isn't my own comic#all I've got is melville adaptations / things about the essex which are basically clinging to melville too#(don't get me wrong I love moby dick but...i want a new story!!)#aaaand the North Water which I just....didn't like at all lol. the book and the show#and the terror....the terror has similar vibes to what gtw will be but I can only rewatch the terror so often
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Dear WFA fans, allow me a prediction
#dc comics#wfa#wayne family adventures#duke thomas#jason todd#I was torn between jason and duke but then decided hey why not both?#There's enough joker for the two of them#I don't even read the WFA comic anymore#I just want a comic where these two get to break the clown's bones together
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So with @edennill mentioning isekai recently (a week ago? Idk), I started thinking and realized something: (if we ignore part of meta that's self-contradictory anyway or if we squint hard enough) if we are contemplating the concept of "isekai-ed into ME", landing there as an elf makes just as much sense as landing there as a human. Because the difference between the two kindreds is how they're tied to Arda and since we are getting thrown into a different world anyway (because this is the only way this premise makes any resemblance of sense, because time travel is a total mess) we can as well be more strongly tied to it. It makes just the same amount of sense as being more loosely tied.
(Tolkien said that there is no inherent physical difference between Men and Elves; the only difference is the nature of their bond with Arda and stuff like this, purely spiritual or whatever to call it.)
#silm#btw why don't we just call it “portal fantasy” anymore#anyway#what do i even tag this#should it get all the tags? probably#so:#silmarillion#tolkien legendarium#the silm#the silmarillion#i know that meta is there#but also we all know it's hard (impossible) to make it worth with the Silm#and generally if we want concepts like Isekai we can't go too deeply into philosophy#ok i can see a premise where it could work but it's.... like if CLS wrote a ME fic but even more... generally more#huh this would be funny to read if done well#but also so niche i don't think anyone would do it#especially that if we want to go explode all the deeper metaphysics we can just have fun with the half-official timeline#(not a typo just a pun)#rambling in tags#re: my new year resolution to be less vague#but half-official timeline i mean the things Tolkien said about Legendarium being our mythological past#Seventh Age... this basically#by “Isekai idea where you can explore the philosophy and not get plot holes from it” i mean:#Arda is a different world / planet / whatever and you get send there as ... i think “prophet” is the best word for it?#like: a divinely ordained isekai#Tolkien would hate this concept#🤣#hmmm#it's that non vague enough?
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Just finished my reread of tfc and honesty though, how could I be so dense and not realise that Andreil was going to be a thing
#aftg#the foxhole court#I wanted to reread these books once we had a date for the golden raven but I really really wanted to reread them asap#to be fair I don't read blurbs – not often anymore anyway#these days they're full of spoilers#I added tfc to my tbr after I read the raven cycle years ago#and read aftg earlier this year after reading these violent delights 🏳️🌈#at first i thought neil was going to end up with kevin#but then kevin and andrew were a package deal and I was vibing with it#but THEN BOOK 2 HAPPENED#anyway I love how everything worked out in the end#and I didnt even started it for the romance lmao#it was all the craziness#g thoughts
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I started in DC by reading fanfics, but as I began to read actual comics, I started to be unable to read the actual fanfic that got me into it in the first place because it's so out of character.
But there are still some stories that I love to read because I love the found family trope so much, even if it isn't really accurate to the source material.
As a comics purist (sometimes), are there tropes that you like enough that you'll still enjoy a fic even if it's not accurate to canon?
oh my god this is SUCH a fun question. bc while i started with the comics, there were certain characters and/or character dynamics where i was exposed to the fanon before the canon (just bc it's hard to read everything when you start out just to read some fanfic) and so i've definitely experienced the fanon to canon transition. (*especially* with Jason Todd. i had only read 80s/90s stuff where he was already dead or the New-52 bc that was on-going when i got into comics and man. the fanon misunderstandings i had about him before i got frustrated and sat down to read all his pre-Flashpoint stuff were absolutely bonkers.) and aside from that, whilst i tend to prefer canon over fanon, i'm not past giving fanon its flowers for occasionally having really interesting insights. occasionally. so some of my fanon "guilty pleasure" tropes would probably be
Morally Grey Tim Drake - this is one where if you try to back it up with canon, i *will* get salty about it. of everyone in the Batfam aside from maybe Bruce and Cass, Tim has the *most* black and white morals. often his internal conflicts are routed in such an inability to compromise his moral views and it can cause him to clash with other characters. he's *very* stiff and rigid in his beliefs and is *rare* to compromise in even the smallest ways. i mean, DC has repeatedly used Tim Drake of Tomorrow/Savior/Gun Batman!Tim for a reason. it's to demonstrate that of everyone, Tim *cannot* have his morals compromised. there's no grey area for him. he's zero or a hundred, so if he tips over the edge of "too far" he tips *all the way*, and doing so is one of his worst fears, how he could go "too far" if he let himself. a couple panels out of context from Red Robin (2009) (which was a grief spiral for Tim to begin with) don't change that. now that said. if it's done *right*, i sort of love Tim being morally grey in fanfic. it takes a specific flavor for me, and it's incredibly important to include that mental spiral along with it, of him struggling to justify it. i don't have any interest in "Tim Drake is loosy goosy with Bruce's morals and has the highest kill count and no one knows teehee" bc it doesn't play with the interesting parts of making Tim morally grey, which are fracturing his psyche. but all in all, i think it's fun to put Tim in a morally grey area and i will read it in fanfic and i enjoy writing it a lot
Joker Junior!Tim Drake - i've not written it on this account (yet) but on my main ao3 account one of my biggest fics surrounds this concept. this is one of those "well *technically* it's canon but only in a specific very divorced from the comics universe and would not work at all in the main timeline" so, i categorize it as fanon in that 95% of fics exploring the concept are not doing so within the Batman Beyond universe, but the main timeline. i just love it. I'll take any excuse to whump Tim, but this concept is so fun. psychologically breaking Tim will always be my favorite pastime. there are so many ways to explore the long-term effects this could have on him, how it could affect the Batfam. i'm not a fan of it being used as a "gotcha" to Jason or Babs' trauma with the Joker to paint Tim as the Ultimate Victim, but it is fun to see how their relationships would be affected by being mutual victims of him. (i have a vague JayTim idea where TIm fully retires from being Robin after being Joker Junior and killing the Joker, making Steph Robin for most of his typical Robin era and Jason still tracks him down out of curiosity bc he wants to know what happened and all. very underbaked but i've got thoughts.)
Renegade/Apprentice of Slade!Dick Grayson - this is another one where yes, this happened *sort of* in canon, but i highly doubt most people writing Renegate!Dick have read or are actually pulling from Nightwing: Renegade. it's just an exploration fo the concept fo Dick being Slade's apprentice and i will always eat it up in any capacity. whether Dick grows up with Slade from a young age, or chooses Slade for whatever reason later in life. it's not anything that works in canon bc it compromises Dick morally (similar to the above with Tim) and therefore will always come across incredibly fanon in most fics. but i can't say i don't enjoy it. it's fun to make Dick a little morally fucked up and see what you can make him under Slade's tutelage.
Jason & Damian Meeting in the League -there's no world where i believe this could work in the canon comics. (maybe in the Young Justice cartoon i suppose, but even then i think it's iffy) i would go as far to say it's wildly unrealistic. i don't see a world where Ra's would let Jason anywhere *near* Damian, bc Jason was Talia's pet project that he didn't approve of. that all said, there's something very interesting about how they *could've* met and them potentially bonding during that timeframe. them being somewhat brotherly during this time because Jason sees Bruce in Damian and sort of latches onto the kid and Damian is full of wonder hearing real stories about Batman and Robin, then that getting violently ripped away by Jason leaving the League is fun to me. it's fun how that could affect them within the Batfam and all. it's super fanon to me, but i do not care. i will eat it up
Bad Dad Clark Kent/Good Dad Lex Luthor - i will admit as a late, i've been less and less kind to this particular fanon bc of everything i've argued with people about, *this* one seems the most pervasive as misunderstood fanon. i don't mind when fanon exists, my gripe is when ppl try to claim it's canon. and the *arguments* i've had over this with people who can never seem to cite an actual comic are... frustrating. but that said, i think there is something fun to this strictly in fanon. the duality of who you expect to accept Kon and who you expect to hurt him being flipped is just sort of fun for the occasional guilty pleasure fic. it can make Kon's internal conflict a bit more interesting. the same goes for the Jon favoritism from Clark, it's not a canon thing (and i rlly wish ppl understood how complicated the timeline of Kon and Jon is and any distance from Clark toward Kon isn't malice, it's that Kon is from a timeline that Clark does not remember in the current canon so Clark just straight up doesn't know the poor kid.) but it's sort of fun to give Kon that complex of being overlooked and forgotten sometimes. making Kon just a *bit* more Luthor than Kent will *always* appeal to me in fanfic, especially if he *knows* it's wrong but craves approval from anyone who will give it.
Good Dad Bruce Wayne - i'll die on the hill Bruce is canonically a shitty father. maybe not to the extreme some people write him as, but he's not great at it. that said, i enjoy it in fanfiction. sometimes, i just want silly fluff or hurt/comfort where Bruce finally gets it right and manages to comfort whatever Batkid is in the fic. one of my favorite fics of all time is hinged on Bruce being a good dad, so i think it's just fun to explore how good the relationships *could* be, if Bruce was slightly less of an asshole. i usually prefer him as an asshole, but there are times i want low stakes nonsense.
Gotham Rogues Having Soft Spots for Robin(s) - just about every Rogue in Gotham has done something absolutely irredeemable, and most of them don't like or care about anyone in the Batfamily. but if there's a fic where one of the Robins inexplicably is sort of close with a Rogue and they have a cute silly relationship out of it? I'll eat it up i fear. Steph and the Riddler are besties? I'll believe it. Tim and Scarecrow get along pretty well? give me ten of these. Rogues protecting Robins just hits a spot. the unexpected nature of the relationship, as well as the fact they see each other regularly, can make a lot of good fodder.
#necrotic answerings#canon vs fanon#batfanon#batfamily#I was *going* to include “Janet and Jack Drake are bad parents”#then realized I don't really like that fanon anymore.#but I used to go *hard* for it even knowing it wasn't canon. it was all projection but still#nowadays I think the tragedy of Tim losing his parents the way he did is *far* worse if they loved him and were good to him.#I'm so serious about the Kon thing i've had *nasty* arguments where ppl got so rude to me telling me to “Google it”#like listen I get it. kon's canon backstory is currently difficult to understand#the timeline of the superboy mantle is a little confusing and most people have not read young justice (2019)#so for fanon it's far easier to simplify it as “clark just kinda sucks to kon” and i enjoy that#but the canon is also fun. it's fun when you consider how fucked up it is most people don't remember kon#and the timeline he remembers doesn't exist anymore.#also technically since they never killed off new-52!superboy on page there could be two superboys/kon-els running around rn. who knows.#i like to believe there is bc it's funny.#i have wanted to write a new-52!konkon/tim/kon sandwich#with the “is it selfcest or not” question#bc new-52!kon wasn't a clone of clark and lex.#so like. he's arguably a different character just sharing the name kon-el for some reason#also on the nightwing: renegade thing i know *damn* well most fanon-only fans haven't read it (no shade in that)#bc the fanon crowd despises devin grayson and she wrote it.#one day i'll write a meta about fandom treatment of devin grayson trust me.#this question was SO fun#i feel like i should have more answers?#if you'd asked me like six months ago this list would be three times as long#but the more i exist in this fandom somehow the saltier i get idk what's happening#so now i'm more and more attached to canon#but i will never begrudge someone for liking fanon#like i said my issue with it is the confusion of what is canon
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Back to normal Navi
The dreaded post has come...
I will not finish this years Kinktober on here. Opening tumblr has become a chore for me more than anything. It sparks no joy, I dont want to scroll dash anymore, I don't bother to keep up with anyone anymore on here.
My interests have shifted greatly over the past few weeks and I found my way back to crafting, gaming and even playing the bass again. At the moment I don't enjoy animanga / fandom on tumblr and wish to no longer participate or create for it.
I'm 99% certain that this is just a mood and I will most definitely be back but as of now I have no motivation or interest to create for tumblr. I'll be here every once in a while and answer asks should I get any and to still do background work in my network but otherwise it will be silent until I found my love and passion for all of this again.
There is no point in forcing myself to write for characters I do not care for, to force myself to keep up with the latest stuff that changes every 2 weeks. I will be selfish now and put myself first until my love has returned- be it 2 weeks, 2 months or 2 years.
- Much love, Luma.
#-ˋˏ ༻sunlit serenade#fuck it got so bad I even turned to religion#yes I have realized that not even my mutuals care anymore and that reblogs were more a thing of give and take#seriously if you don't care and don't wanna read my stuff then don't. unfollow me even I don't care#but I'm not a transactional machine or someone you can use to get compliments#I don't want to end this on a bitter note so uh yeah#im still writing still creating but just not for animanga or fandom. it doesn't feel right as of now#loving you all and thank you for all the kind words and all the connections#im taking like I'm leaving everyone behind and disappear#*talking#im really not gonna do that but it will be uncharacteristically quiet on here#...for a while
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