#and i did a couple of good recontextualisation in this i think

[lonelyroommp3]

Can we get some brat remix thoughts?

absolutely love it. i love how, for the most part, it avoids what you might typically expect from a remix album (ie. redone production and/or a guest verse, although the songs that do that - such as my bff guess featuring billie eilish - are still incredibly strong in their own right) in favour of basically putting out a set of completely new songs that exist in conversation with the originals. like i'll say, hand on heart, i originally did not Get a couple of the remixes (namely, talk talk & the a.g cook/addison rae von dutch) when they were released as singles because they were so different to the originals in ways that really challenged what i thought a remix entailed. but now i completely get it and i think it's just insane how charli & her collaborators have managed to put out a load of songs that are all bangers in their own right but also elevate & are elevated by the context of the originals.

after my first listen i immediately put together a playlist that alternates the original songs with their remix album counterparts and genuinely, i think that's how it SHOULD be listened to because it not only heightens the emotional impact of the songs that are in direct conversation with each other (e.g. the melancholy tone of the original "so i" compared with charli choosing to look back on her good memories with sophie in the remix, building from the original's understated tone to the remix's euphoric climax) but also helps you connect the dots between the remixes that seem really disconnected from the original (e.g. talk talk).

speaking of that disconnect, i love the fact that "remix" in the context of brat and it's completely different... applies not just to the production in some cases but also taking aspects of the lyrics and completely recontextualising them in the same way you might isolate and play with a particular musical fragment in a more conventional remix. like thematically the "b2b" and "mean girls" remixes have almost nothing to do with their original versions but they use kernels of the original and give them new meaning in a really interesting way. and i think it's so cool to have all these different kinds of remixes explored in the same album, from the complete recontextualisation to the conversation pieces to songs that feel like an extended outro of sorts (e.g. "rewind", "sympathy is a knife") to the songs that are more straightforward remixes ("360", "365", "club classics")... just completely blowing the definition of remix wide open and having fun with it the whole time

with that said there are some songs i think are not completely perfect. i'm not convinced yet that ariana is a natural fit for the "sympathy is a knife" remix - i adore what her adlibs provide sonically in the later choruses but i'm just not sure her verse gels as it should. also while i fucking love the "club classics" and "365" remixes i DESPERATELY need proper extended versions like, yesterday because 2 minutes is just not enough time to properly get into and make the most of tracks that filthy. we need proper 7 minute club mixes. with at least 3 more shygirl verses btw.

anyway. standout remixes to me (excluding girl so confusing and guess bc i've talked enough about how i love both of those already) - i might say something stupid, talk talk, everything is romantic, so i, i think about it all the time

[dracomort]

Hi :-) can I ask 7, 19, 22, and 29 (or if that’s too many, then whichever is most interesting to you!)

Ship Ask Game (answering for The Travelling Cabinet universe Taco).

Thank you for your ask! I'll answer 7, 22 and 29 for this one.

7. Who is the more romantic one?

Draco is by far the more classically romantic person. He loves the idea that he fell in love with the first person he met in the 40s (just... doesn't love the reality that it was literally Voldemort), and he adores the thought of being both the giver and receiver of grand acts of romance. His problem is that he knows Tom would find such gestures stupid, wasteful and suspicious.

Part of maturing for Draco is recontextualising what 'romance' is beyond the saucy novels he pinched off his ex-girlfriend as a fifteen-year-old. Once he realises that someone committing a massacre for you is, in fact, a grand act of romance, and that stealing significant artefacts for your significant other is their idea of peak romance, he'll be a lot more satisfied 😌. And once Tom realises Draco wants flowers pinched from the Hogwarts greenhouses, there will be no unhappiness in their relationship on that front.

22. How do they apologize after arguments?

Both of them are terrible at apologising. Which is good, in a strange way, as in that regard there's no imbalance.

Tom doesn't tend to take Draco's tantrums seriously because drama occurs with him on a daily basis. If the upset continues for more than a day or two, then he'll actually start trying to solve the problem. If the problem is unsolvable—like, 'i'm upset that you're not upset that a theoretical future version of you did X'—then he draws a blank. Mostly he waits till Draco forgets he's angry. Draco is the quick-to-boil, quick-to-cool type of kettle. He likes to give the silent treatment but can never maintain it for very long because he enjoys the sound of his own voice too much.

I've been trying to think of a scenario in this universe where Tom would expect an apology, but none have sprung to mind. He's got a high tolerance for Draco's brand of annoying, having spent seven years with spoilt, stuck-up purebloods for housemates, and besides that, I don't see Tom putting much stock in apologies. Actions over words.

29. What is something they can never agree on? How do they meet in the middle?

So, there's the obvious one—the just and humane way of disposing of Muggles. Tom's views are utterly unaltered, no matter how much other growth he might have done over the course of the fic. Draco, having gained perspective and maturity from 1) seeing Muggles tortured to death at the Manor, and 2) actually meeting and talking to them through his adventures in the 40s, is less keen on the 'slaughter them all' strategy. However, he has zero chance of ever convincing Tom, because Tom (rightfully) believes Draco knows nothing about Muggles compared to him.

Now, moving on from homicide to a very mundane couple problem—I think they'd have irreconcilable differences in their attitudes toward managing finances. Tom has the penny-pinching financial anxiety of a poverty-stricken Great Depression orphan, Draco has the carefree spending habits and inability to budget of any filthy rich pureblood. Once Draco finishes his traineeship, probably the healthiest way forward for them is a joint account for expenses and separate savings accounts 🤣

[theultracharmingladynoire]

This has been a rant building up for a while now and I just need to put it in here but it's that. I remember the joy and excitement I felt when I watched y/o/i ep 1 - 10 because I literally. Knew nothing about the show except for the fact it was gay?? dvsjgshd but it just was so GOOD but then I. Came across a couple of interpretations of ep 11-12 (which I hadn't watched by then so I had no idea what went down) which was just people being disappointed, people thinking the ending was changed for a season 2, people thinking it was out of nowhere (especially V/ictor's comeback?? I guess??) And that really. messed up my perception of the show?? Like upto then I was forming my own interpretations of the characters and after this I. Was lowkey scared to watch the last two episodes because I was afraid of it being bad™ (if that even makes sense) and then one day even when I did watch them I didn't watch them properly?? Like I even missed a lot of scene and dialogue because I was too nervous about what I had read about it before.

And like. I don't even think those interpretations are entirely wrong for record. I understand that especially when there was a whole week between episodes and when the fandom was so huge and active people might have a very different viewing experience which directly plays into how they interpreted the character arcs! And those interpretation are extremely valid even though I disagree with them. The show definitely leaves a lot upto intrepretation of the viewers so there isn't any interpretation that is necessarily wrong™ (Idk how to phrase this sorry)

But it's just that I wasn't able to form MY own interpretation properly because I was influenced by others' ?? (In lack of a better way to word it) and I just. I've been mulling over this for a whole MONTH and going back and forth and back about the ending. And it just feels very draining when I go out to look for meta and people who had opinions similar to mine and find...like what ten people?? it kind of makes me feel like I am looking at things wrong, and that probably the finale WAS just bad or whatever (which seems to be a more common idea in what I've seen)

I do think there were pacing issues, and I do think the character arcs CAN be interpreted differently than what they are in the finale but I also am a bit sad that not many people tried to recontextualise the show in light of the finale (again, it isn't a MUST But I really wish people tried to if I am making sense?)

And it's sad because I know this can be fun if I just created my own bubble without all the meta and opinions I disagree with but it's hard when that is somehow always what I come across? And I KNOW I should stop reading a post when I see that it may suggest something towards the opinions that I disagree with (because that'll just waste my energy), but then what if I AM wrong? What if those posts are right and I am willingly closing my eye towards what the characters originally are or something?? Is what perplexes me out and really makes me sort of nervous and uneasy(?)

And now it is getting worse and I feel like I am slowly losing all the love I had for this show and it absolutely SUCKS because I just want to enjoy this silly little show and now this is all....just a mess

[iceheap]

Thank you!! I read your tags too and omg I'm so glad you liked my redemption arc hc for my lil gremlin boy cjfhfgzjhosvj and wow I don't really interact with a lot of hc on here so I didn't know ppl had tried to just hand magic Zane's actions away with like, chores around the village? ???? What???? That makes no sense, Zane is literally responsible for GENOCIDE I think in a way I'm also letting him off easy with house arrest like wtf. You can't just be like "and then they forgave and it was all okay!!!" Like wtf.

Zane was a nice challenge for me because it shows how reframing certain things canake a character a lot more sympathetic. I mentioned it in the post a bit, but the part I feel is the most inexcusable of Zane's actions is the anililation of Falcon Claw. You can't remove it from Zane's crimes, but you can REFRAME it.

This might totally ruin your good feelings about this hc or make it better, but basically this is a small glimpse of my process into recontextualising characters. I hc that, one: Zane was under orders to destroy falcon claw. It makes sense because FC was the closest village to O'Khasis. They were practically neighbors.

Two: during Aaron's time as lord, FC was going through an economical recession. Similar to how Phoenix Drop was at the start of the series. Except they had a lord and phonix drop didn't. It was going on because of a combination of factors, none of which were Aaron's fault. Lily was a big part of FC political climate going down the drain, actually. I know that Jess probably made her a terrible person in Mystreet due to like, romance and competition reasons so Aphmau and Aaron would end up together, but I like to mirror characters and their personalities etc and it makes sense to keep Lily consistent. Aaron frames her as a good person and never has anything bad to say about her because she's dead and also he was loyal to her and tried his best to be a good husband.

They were arranged for marriage, they didn't marry out of love. Aaron tried to make it work, Lily did not. Lily was a serial cheater and there were big odds that Jacob wasn't actually Aaron's child.

Lily had been planning a coup to take the title of lord of Falcon Claw for herself and had roped the rest of the village into it. Most of the children had been sent away temporarily as a result.

Zane arrives to "visit" the day the coup is planned. The villagers aren't subtle and Zane is really good at politics and listening to/finding gossip (it's considered information and can be useful even though Zane hates having to resort to petty gossip) so he figures out what's going on pretty quickly, and who's behind it.

And he also finds out about how Jacob might not actually be the Lord's biological child.

So he tests it. Aaron would let Jacom play around the village pretty independently since he trusted the rest of the villagers to keep an eye on him. Zane gets him alone and uses one of hisqny relics to test his paternity.

It comes back negative. Jacob is not Aaron's son.

And, keep in mind, the only reference to how an illegitimate child is treated is in his own family. So Zane, feeling bad for him (not gat he realizes it or admits it) kidnapps him. He puts him in this medallion thing, I think there was a mod where you could put pets in necklaces? Yeah he does that.

And then he sends a manmade imp to deliver the relic that will kill the rest of the village.

Zane leaves Aaron alive as MERCY. He thought he was doing him a FAVOR by killing his traitorous village members and his shit wife.

He delivers Jacob off to a couple in the country side who take care of him as their own and pays them off pretty well so they'll take care of him. Jacob grows up to be a NPC villager floating around somewhere in the world. I hc he probably actually moved to Phoenix Drop during their population boom since he probably has a business of some sort and wanted to take advantage of the high traffic in the area, and integrates himself into the community pretty well. Odds are is he goes by Jay instead of Jacob so no one even suspects he might be Aaron's kid.

Anyway, yeah. Does this excuse Zane killing a bunch of people? No, obviously, and when Aaron is eventually resurrected (that will happen, because not letting Jess get away with the clusterfuck that was his arc, my boy deserves justice and a proper developed romance) he doesn't just forgive Zane and call it a day. Aaron was robbed of seeing his kid grow up. He suspected Jacob wasn't his child but loved him anyway. He knew the villagers and Lily didn't like him and tried his best anyway. None of this excuses Zane's actions, but it changes him from a power hubgy monster who kills people for fun into someone who can even take accountability and change.

Anyway, yes, I try my best to keep original character beats and twist them around a little bit. I'm so glad you liked the og hc! I might have gone a bit wild with this response I'm so sorry!!!uenyhsybysnyney

@panicataphmausinsanity okay so Zane HC's LETS GOOOOOOOO

Before we start trigger warning for like, child abuse and torture and shit. Seriously this gets dark. Zane redemption must come at a price >:D

So. Something interesting to me in regards to Zane is how in MCD, He's like, this evil, terrible human being, but in Mystreet, he's like, a semi functional human being who can be a NOT bad person and NOT do bad things. And so I got to thinking.

I don't think Zane was born a bad person.

Personally, I kind of hate the way Jess wrote Zane. Like, yes, evil for the sake of evil is great and all, but like. In season one and two, Zane was this overarching antagonist who was always one step ahead of the cast and plotting and having a good time being a paice of shit.

And then season 3 comes around and now he's a shadow knight, on the run, has PTSD...

Look, I'm not knocking the guy for having PTSD. I'm just saying that the way it's portrayed kind of makes him seem like a whimpery coward. AGAIN, NOT KNOCKING PTSD!!

I think the position that Zane found himself in season 3 was a PERFECT set up for a redemption arc and it makes me SO MAD that it didn't happen.

So I guess I have to do it myself apparently -_-

I've been thinking a lot about Zane. I don't want him to stop being evil. Not right away. So we keep what happened in the first two seasons the same. He's a cackling maniac that has killed a shit ton of people and is on his father's payroll.

And then he dies.

(skill issue lol)

Anyway, Zane is dead. But he's also Zane, so of course he weasels his way out of being dead. And then he gets tortured and is subjected to the same suffering he condemned so many others to yada yada yada PTSD bleh.

Everything seems to be the same so far.

But then he breaks out if the nether. Still, we're on track, right?

He gets captured, he gets expedited to Phoenix Drop, he gets interrogated, it's all the same.

But here we find a canon divergence. Instead of being absolute dumbasses, they don't bring him into the nether. Let's scrap that plot point entirely.

Instead, we're going to let Zane bake in prison for a while!

Here are the main issues that make Zane irredeemable.

1. He's killed like, a shit ton of people, for funsies ig

2. He killed Vylad.

3. He destroyed Aaron's village.

Let's keep those things in mind.

So he's in prison. While in prison, Garroth starts to visit him (along with Travis but shhhh we'll get to him another day) and just. You know. Be angry.

Garroth has seen Zane as a spoiled brat his entire life. He's always been their father's favorite. He's always had everything handed to him on a silver platter. He's always been willing to do whatever it takes for power. He's greedy. He's psychotic. Garroth hates him.

But Zane is Garroth's brother. And Garroth is the type of golden retriever, gold hearted, kind type of character to still love his brother even if he hates him.

That doesn't mean he goes in and is like, nice to him though. Nope. Garroth goes to visit him and nine times out of ten it devolves into a screaming match where Zane antagonizes him the entire time and Garroth yells at him for being a shitty human being.

And then one day Phoenix Drop is attacked and Zane escapes.

They track him down eventually. When they find him, they strike a deal with him. Due to Irene related shenanigans they need his expertise as a scholar of Irene to figure out some more stuff for Aphmau. In exchange, they'll protect him from the Shadow Lord (who he pissed off by stealing one of his soul fragments lol Zane behavior).

Eventually they're able to establish a rapore with Zane. Garroth still gets a migraine whenever they have a conversation. Vylad still refuses to speak to him (oh btw he's visiting from his nether revolution vacation just so u know) and Aphmau still wants to tear out his guts for killing the love of her life or whatever, but he becomes manageable. They can like, stand him. A little bit. Slightly.

And then Zianna gets kidnapped or whatever. So they go rescue her. But when they get back to Phoenix Drop they forget to mention the fact that Zane is like. There and in the wild and not currently killing entire villages worth of people.

So Zianna rolls up to Phoenix Drop and gets jumpscared by her youngest son and also, notably, Zane is NOT happy to see her. He shuts the front door in her face. It's hilarious even though Garroth doesn't think of it that way.

So, now we have our key players all in one place. Garroth, Vylad, Zane, and Zianna.

Let's say they have to all go find an artifact toghether or something and they need Zianna there because it's related to something she knows and they need Zane there because of Irene lore reasons. they go on this mission. One day, they sit and set up for the night, set up bedrolls, whatever. They're lounging around the fire and talking when Vylad eventually mentions his time as a shadow knight in the nether and something about torture.

Zane blinks, and, having not been included in the conversation initially, buts it to say,

"Oh, please. Don't tell me getting tortured by those amatures was DISTRESSING for you. I would have thought father's methods would have given you thicker skin."

The others bristle and start scolding him, of course, because Zane is like, the reason Vylad became a shadow knight in the first place. But Vylad himself, who is very observant and hard to antagonize, latches into something Zane said.

"Methods? What methods?" He says. He says it sharply, too.

Of course, Zane doesn't pick up on this. He just rolls his eyes.

"Don't tell me you forgot. Father had a whole floor dedicated to torture and loved collecting new methods from around the region. I think he even had a historian employed who would research for him..."

"What?" Garroth says, stunned out of his anger.

Zianna has gone silent. So has everyone else, and now they're watching with baited breaths.

"So what? What would that have to do with me?"

And for the first time that they've ever seen, Zane looks... Puzzled.

"What, did he go easy on you? Didn't you talk back to him all the time? Once, after just asking him a question, he had two of my nails pulled. Shadow Knight torture was child's play in comparison," he shrugs, then takes a bite out of his stale price of bread.

There's silence.

Zane looks back at all of them, confused and now kind of pissed off. He looks like he usually does when he feels like he's about to be scolded for saying something crass. Except, that's not what happens. Instead, Vylad looks him in the eye for the first time since Zane killed him, and with the most emotion they've ever heard from him, says,

"What?"

Zane hums.

"Come on. Don't play dumb. He hated you. Im sure he must have sent you to the "torture basement" at least once. You got on his nerves constantly,"

Garroth makes an aborted movement, like he's going to stand up and rush him, but Vylad stops him with a flick of his hand. And then Vylad starts doing what he does best. Interrogating him.

So remember that list, right? Let's reframe a few things.

Zane was not the favorite child. Garroth was.

Garte was a paice of shit. Garte hated Vylad. But he also hates Zane. Why wouldn't he? Vylad was his wife's affair child, sure, but Zane, Zane was Zianna's spitting image.

When Zane was little, he used to take snails and out them in the grass after it rained. He uses to clamor for his mother's pastries just like his brothers. He was a normal child, and he was NOT born a psychopath.

But Garte had a thought, one day.

Wouldn't it be funny... If he made his wife think he WAS one?

Wouldn't it be funny to punish her that way? Wouldn't it be funny to turn Zane into a terrible person, and have her think it was for no reason? Make her think that she birthed a psychopath? How much would it hurt her? How much would she weep?

Garte used to punish Zane for Vylad's joy. One of Vylad's laughs would equal one slap to the face. One side remark in defence of their mother would equal one hour locked in his father's study closet in his office.

Garte turns Zane against himself brothers. And the best part in his mind?

He makes Zane believe that they know about all of it.

He tells Zane that his mother knows about it. That his brothers don't care that he's beaten. That Vylad does things so he gets punished on purpose.

Zane grows up thinking that his brothers probably go through this too. He grows up thinking that his mother just doesn't love him. And so he doesn't say a thing.

Garte starts having him tortured instead of superficially physically abused? He says nothing.

Garte makes him become a priest of Okasis even though the consequence of failing the academy is death? He says nothing.

Garte would encourage Zane to blugeon animals to death and bring them to Zianna and laugh at her horrified face from afar. Garte encourages Zane to say psychotic things while they're eating dinner, and watches as his family becomes more and more convinced Zane is a monster.

Until Zane is one.

But this reframes a few things.

The people Zane killed? It was under orders. He eventually became his father's right hand man. Most of his overarching goals have been in service of his father.

For Aaron's village, we'll stick a pin in that one, but long story short, Aaron's village had been planning a coup that night under his wife's orders. Zane had them killed under his father's orders so they could eliminate them as political neighbors. He let Aaron live out of pity.

And Vylad.

Basically, remember when I said that Garte used to punish Zane according to Vylad's actions?

One day, Vylad gets into an explosive argument with Garte defending Zianna. And Garte, again, without the other's knowing, has Zane tortured. Except this time it's for a WEEK STRAIGHT.

So when Zane gets out. He's. Very unstable.

And then he comes across Vylad in a semi secluded area.

And Vylad is acting like he did nothing, and all he's ever done is make Zane suffer, and Zane hates him hates him HATES HIM--

And so he snaps. And he kills him.

Keep in mind, though, Zane thinks this is all normal. He doesn't realize that killing his own brother has traumatized him. He doesn't realize that he's a victim of abuse. He doesn't realize that what his dad did is not okay because he THINKS HIS FAMILY KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED, and if they didn't contradict his abuse, then this must be normal. He thinks that Vylad has probably been tortured too. He thinks Garroth is their father's favorite because in his mind he's determined that Garroth not receiving any attention from their father is a GOOD thing because ATTENTION EQUALS TORTURE to him.

And this reframes a few things. His constant bid for power? It's not greed, it's DESPERATION. Power makes him feel safe. Hurting others makes him feel powerful because that's how his father had power over him.

His highly volatile and violent personality? It's l he's ever known. Do you have ANY idea what torture could do to a child? He has severe PTSD. Like, severe and repressed and his outburst are more common when he's uncomfortable or anxious or experiencing any negative emotion, which is often.

Garte took Zane's empathy from him. Turned him against his family. Made him into a monster. With these types of characters, I imagine it would probably be very difficult for them to redevelop their emotions and empathy because if they do that, they would have to face their whole mountain of trauma and the guilt of all the lives they've ruined.

I think eventually, after a lot of work, Zane does eventually regain his empathy. It probably finally sinks in during a small gathering. His mother makes her famous cake. Zane has long gotten used to being excluded during these sorts of things, but then...

His mother slides a plate of cake right in front of him.

Strawberry.

His favorite.

And she smiles at him.

This is probably after they found out about Garte being a peice of shit. Maybe a few months.

All Zane has ever wanted is to be loved. Maybe he didn't know it, but when he takes a bite of his mother's strawberry cake for the first time in decades and the nostalgic taste registers in his brain, something snaps.

And he becomes human again.

And he realizes:

Oh.

I'm a person.

I'm a murderer.

I'm a monster.

LMAO WAS THIS COHERENT SORRY PANIC I TRIED MY BEST I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS ONE OSIBWIBDIBSIBU

[etuwubrutus]

parallels between benji/derek (s1) and victor/benji (s2)

okay SO I just rewatched s2ep5 of 'Love, Victor,' and I finally saw what people were saying ahout s2 benji's parallel's with s1 derek.

in season 1, when benji plans the whole 'one year anniversary dinner' for derek, we see him met with dismissiveness, the line, 'what are we, straight?' It's something typically romantic and cheesy, and derek uses the excuse of 'gay culture' to trivialise the gesture. benji's obviously upset about this, because he wanted to do this gesture with his boyfriend, who says it's too much of a 'straight' thing to do. derek's attitude of 'don't take this stuff seriously, I don't mean to hurt you by it, it's just that I think you're being silly,' is showcased clearly, and it hurts benji because, in this situation, he's on the receiving end.

reminder - in s1, benji's group of friends consist of derek's band. he's sort of there as Derek's boyfriend, the high-schooler, kind of inexperienced, etc.

the derek/benji s1 relationship goes downhill because derek continues to trivialise benji's interests and opinions - benji accepts this for the most part because he wants the relationship to work out, but eventually, derek's lack of change and adaptability toward benji's identity is what causes them to break up.

it's AMAZING how this behaviour is recontextualised in season 2! here, the relationship between victor/benji puts benji in the position of being more experienced in 'gay culture,' (having dated a guy before and having his own group of LGBT friends.) especially in episode 5, once victor's left his own group of friends (the basketball team) and put in a situation where he's the inexperienced one, hanging out with benji's band as the 'boyfriend.'

benji's trivialisation of victor's identity is in the way he talks about basketball. early on in ep5, benji tries explaining away why victor misses being on the team ('you only played basketball because your dad wanted you to, because you thought it was a straight-guy thing to do') and later, when talking to his band, makes 'ex-jock' jokes, and shows relief at how victor is less of a 'straight-guy.'

the line, 'thank god, now I don't have to sit with the basketball girlfriends and do the whole 'go grizzlies' dance,' is ESPECIALLY well done, since it shows how benji's learnt to trivialise conventional couple activities, which he wouldn't have done in s1, and ALSO, subtly hints at how he doesn't want to be in a situation where he doesn't fit in as a 'boyfriend' (as he previously was with Derek's friends.) he says these things jokingly among his own friends, subconsciously mirroring what Derek had done in s1.

and GUYS. I love benji's character, and ESPECIALLY in this episode, because??? later on, after the concert, he confronts victor about why he's upset, and while initially reacting to victor's, 'you make me seem like some dumb jock (i.e, I act too straight for your friends,)' by dismissing it all as a joke, he PICKS UP ON HIS OWN BEHAVIOUR! we see this in his expression, as he tries to figure out what he's been doing! We SEE benji realise that he's hurting victor the same way derek did to him in s1, and benji BAMF campbell goes the extra mile to SHOW that he understands what he's done wrong.

the 'go grizzles' dance sequence was aesthetically appealing, yes, but canon-wise, benji's a musician, not a dancer - he takes the extra step, puts in the extra effort to show that he SUPPORTS victor, and doesn't want to trivialise his identity.

this is just. amazing. truly great writing. i LOVE this parallel because it introduces a familiar character dynamic to the audience, while playing the actions of said characters completely differently both times: derek doesn't change, and the audience understands that he doesn't value his partner (benji) enough to make him feel secure in the relationship. Benji TAKES THE EXTRA TEN MILES to check his own behaviour and show his partner (victor) that he values his identity, and supports his endeavours.

It's a beautiful example of stopping cycles of damage in relationships - benji COULD have acted like Derek did with him, but instead chose to actively be different. idk guys, it's great, and TL;DR, benji campbell is one of my favourite characters of all time, the writing of the show is too good for victor to not be at his door in s3.

[egg-emperor]

Imagine Mr. Tinker somehow tricking and beating Starline... then realising that if he is really Eggman, he still can naturally return to being him in the future. After some thinking, Mr. Tinker concludes that the source of Eggman's evil personality should come from him never expierencing having friends and therefore resorting to intimidating and enslaving people to get attention and love he craves. Weighing the risks, Mr. Tinker decides that his best shot is regaining his memories now and recontextualising them with his fresh expierence at being beloved and befriended as Tinker to destroy Eggman's personality for good. Tinker writes a farewell letter for Belle in the case he fails... and then himself activates Star line's machine... Couple seconds later... "HAHAHAHAHA! You were just as smart as 7 year old me, Mr Tinker... No, you WERE 7 year old ME, mentally. Too bad you didn't know that 8 year old me had deduced that enslaving those stupider than you is funnier and more efficient than befriending them, and then rejected ever having friends out of my own free will, not out of some tragic accident. Did you really plan to win against a vastly more superior version of you? For a few months of friendship to win against half of century worth or magnificent villainy? Your arrogance is adorable - I recognise myself, albeit vastly inferior version, in you! Farewell, Mr. Tinker." Starline, having just regained consciousness, applauding from the floor.

OOOHHH

I haven't thought much about Tinker for a long time because any amount of interest I had in the concept pretty much diminished with how poorly it was handled in canon and also how IDW's version of Sonic and fans decided that it implied things about Eggman that it didn't, since how someone acts with amnesia certainly shouldn't be indicative of their "real self" or anything like that and doesn't make sense. With that, I started to dislike it as a whole and wasn't sure if there were many ways that I could find enjoyment or be interested in the concept again. But this, oh I like this a lot with the impact it could have after getting to see the forever impossible personality of if things were different through Mr. Tinker, and especially the message it could send about Eggman's true self with all his memories intact.

Mr. Tinker deciding on a nonexistent sad backstory as motivation for why Eggman became who he is like the common woobification ideas for villains, only for the real Eggman to scoff at it and reveal it was entirely his choice and free will to take the evil path that he did... Mr. Tinker offering a perspective of someone that can't fathom the idea of not having a misguided and a genuinely evil motive instead and attempting to project his different experiences and feelings to make Eggman's actions more understandable to him, while Eggman just proves that it is possible, his motives are genuinely evil and entirely his choice, and it's his real true self... That's a brilliant idea that could disprove a lot of misconceptions about his character! I would've been delighted to see it.

This is so much better than the way they played up a kind of angst that made Eggman seem like a prisoner inside himself that was genuinely capable of being as soft and sweet like Tinker as his true self, having him reflect on it in the most OOC way possible in #23, and harming the way people view his character before they finally made him think back to it in a more accurate way- which took them too long and it shouldn't have been any other way prior. This way wouldn't have done that kind of damage at all, instead it would actually do the perfect opposite by helping to add even more fuel and proof against the good guy deep down with tragic past misconceptions and it would have a pretty epic story impact too.

Very clever, I like the way you think! >:D

[anxiouspotatorants]

Whoopsy daisy I made a Shadow and Bone random thoughts post:

The costumes in this show are impeccable. I was drooling over all the keftas and the ball gowns in 1.05 and the crow outfits. Hell, even the winter-camo outfits that Mal, Mikhael and Dubrov wore in 1.04 were amazing.

Am I the only one who isn’t surprised by the kruge pronounciation? Because I thought it would sound like how English people say Scandinavian words and I wasn’t wrong.

Coming in to this show as someone who had only read the Six of Crows duology, I expected to at least tolerate Malina based on the trailer clips. I kid you not: less than five minutes into the very first episode they owned my ass. That might be a new record for me.

Seriously the friendship? The pining? The finding home in each other and being able to acknowledge their faults and apologize to each other? Both of them having massive “fight me” energy and protecting each other? Hugs?? Why am I surprised that I ship this?

Some of those scene transitions/flashback edits were so good! Like I know they repeated that meadow scene a lot throughout the season, but the cuts from kid-Mal looking at the rabbit to grown up Mal psyching himself up for the fist fight? Poetic cinema.

The Darkling was horrible and I love it. He wasn’t a carbon copy villain, nor did his complexity redeem him. He was a perfectly complex and understandable monster and I am living for it. I have not been so happy to despise a character in ages and I genuinely bow in gratitude to both the writers and Ben Barnes, because I finally got to enjoy watching a character I did not for one second root for ( #writevillainswellagain)

Look I already loved Jesper in the book but his on-screen translation elevated him from a fave to the fave. I was worried that they would push him into a comedic relief-role, but he got to keep both his heart, his depth, and his humour. Kit Young did an amazing job bringing what was already a great character on page to an even greater character on screen and I once again applaud.

Am I a bit bitter that the casting had some interesting choices for certain roles (aka hiring light skin and mid-size actors for explicitly darker skin and plus-size roles)? Kind of. Do I think there are important discussions worth having about this? Yup. Do I also think that every actor hired for Shadow and Bone did an amazing job and deserve zero hate and massive amounts of love? Also yes.

I had Alexei for one episode and one episode only, and I still miss that poor sucker. This show did a surprisingly good job with making me care about a massive amount of characters considering the screen time they had and the amount of episodes this season had. Good job.

For some reason I expected Inej to be a lot more brooding based on how I perceived her in the books but I love what Amita Suman did with her. Her translation completely recontextualised everything I remember from the books and just brought this truly fresh character to life. Assassin with a conscience indeed.

Also I did love the Kaz we got in this season but I can barely contain myself as I wait for season 2 to be made and for a certain flashback to take place because that moment in the book was visceral and it stayed with me for a long time and I knew before the show announcement that this flashback could become a television moment. 

Speaking of Kaz the crows were so chaotic and messy and I’m here for it. Their interactions with each other and their improvised back-up plans were everything. I somehow didn’t expect the crows to become the comedic relief of the season but it honestly makes so much sense.

A couple episodes in I still didn’t get the Zoya hype (remember I haven’t read the books) but was a massive Genya fan. By the end of the season I was like “oh both of these girls are getting redemption arcs and I am here for it”.

Speaking of redemption I still don’t like Matthias. I’m sorry but I just don’t. I get that he is important to many and that they like his relationship with Nina, but I just don’t have the patience for him and feel like Nina can do better. I still want him to get a redemption... but maybe not through a romance with the grisha woman he repeatedly slutshames, is bigoted towards and chokes at least once (twice if that SoC scene from book 1 happens). That being said this is just how I see him, so feel what ever you feel about him and ship to your heart’s content!

Alina’s journey through this season made complete sense to me. It hurt to see certain things, but they were necessary in my eyes. Seeing her go from this essentially insecure but brave girl to a manipulated pawn to an even stronger and more self reliant girl in spite of everything was amazing. It did feel like a well-written hero’s journey and I’m looking forward to seeing where she goes next.

Apparently a lot of book-readers don’t like Mal (and I am not here to change anyone’s mind about that) but the Mal I saw on the show was amazing. I actually kind of wish we had seen more of who he was outside of his relationship to Alina (f.ex. other flashbacks than the meadow, maybe something about any of his missions while separated from Alina pre-show), but I also loved what we got of him with Alina. We still got to see a guy who was brave, stubborn, flirtatious, a bit judgemental but with a strong sense of humour, and a lot of loyalty (to Alina but also to his friends). I can hardly wait to see what’s next for him.

Milo the goat. Where do I even begin. Not only did we get that Jesper-scene, but their farewell actually became a Chekhov’s gun for Mal in 1.07? Milo is the true hero of the season.

Speaking of 1.07 I loved the tent scene between Alina and the Darkling. She both got to be realistic about her feelings for the Darkling and stand up for herself and for others and call him out. The way I interpret the Darkling, he is the kind of villain who creates a saviour narrative around himself but cares more about power than anything else. He’ll say he’s doing everything to protect his people but is the first to kill the very people he claims to love. And Alina’s tent-speech really hammered that in for me.

I adore Baghra. Is she morally dubious? Yes. Was she incredibly mean to Alina during training to the point where it might have been excessive? Yes. Did she not take any of the Darkling’s bullshit and act as the proper mentor for Alina when the Darkling had said that he was going to train her? Yes. Am I kind of a Baghra stan now? I mean maybe.

The antler-collar was so evil and gross but from a visually narrative stand point it was perfect. 

Also I still have no idea who David is but I want redemption for him too. Honestly I feel like half the supporting cast is gearing up for redemption arcs next season and I am excited for most of them.

Nina’s reaction when she hears Kaz on the boat? Priceless. Actually the whole boat scene from when she goes up on deck again to the cut back to the fold was priceless.

That being said the final scene had me even more ready for season 2.

Jesper kind of gave me messy period-fantasy James Bond? Does that make sense?

And Mal kind of gave me Lois Lane energy? As in he’s the mortal love interest that many assume is the hero/heroine’s weakness but actually functions as their emotional strength and inspiration? Am I reaching here or am I getting somewhere?

Mikhael and Dubrov. What a duo. Absolute madlads.

Also I’d like to see more Nadia if that is possible? Because the few scenes we had of her had me intrigued but then she sort of disappeared? Is she going to be important or was she just more of a temporary supporting character? 

I entered this show a casual Six of Crows fan with mild interest in Kanej and I finished this season a mess. A mess who ships Kanej and Malina and Genya with that David guy even though they had about 30 seconds of screentime together and Zoya with redemption and Jesper with main-character status (hey we’re not getting Wylan until season 2 at least) and kind of those two Ravkan army guys and Nina with anyone else and Matthias with a better redemption storyline and the Darkling with karma! Also, a mess with a whole new set of comfort characters!

[keingleichgewicht]

really need to make A Post about how one of the things that makes pafl so fucking good is the relentless use of recontextualisation: we keep going round and round and round revisiting the same events or the same thematic points but we get a new angle or new context or new information each time and it slaps! it’s incredible! pafl is a perfect object lesson in the power of point of view in a narrative!

like right now i am thinking about sergei.

who for the first couple songs is. hmmm. well, he’s not exactly sympathetic, is he? he only ever features briefly but he has an outsize influence on the narrative, not really in good ways: he’s distant, he’s overprotective, he’s keeping sanya from being who she wants to be, he rats KT out (supremely uncool move), he unknowingly kind of rats dmitry out as well (by tipping olya off, although thank god that turned out alright)

and even in the mill we only really get a snapshot of what his deal is, and it’s explanation, not justification: the trauma of what happened in the meat grinder may explain why he’s overprotective now, but it doesn’t mean he’s right. and then strike three.

and suddenly you get it! this is the part sanya wouldn’t tell us! and the difference in framing here is everything: in false disposition sergei’s faceless, looming, he says people like you almost vindictively, after all it’s not a phrase that usually indicates good intentions for whoever’s being addressed - and in strike 3 sanya’s wide-eyed, unguarded, human, you can just tell that this is the point of view of someone who loves her to bits, and you can tell he wants so badly for her to understand this, to accept his help, to accept his protection, but she won’t do it

and his perspective makes sense; it is achingly sad but he is objectively right, the world is a nasty place, it is nastier to anyone who doesn’t fit in, it’ll fuck you over for no reason at all - just look at what just happened to yura. one mistake, one misstep, one risk sergei told him not to take and he’s a murderer, he’s a criminal, he’s traumatized to hell, and he got olya (who didn’t do anything wrong at all!) fucked over even worse into the bargain

false disposition says i would rather enjoy life than be perfectly safe and you agree with that, instinctively - it’s impossible to live a life free of risk, so better be happy, right, better than living in a padded box and being nothing but miserable. and strike 3 says for fuck’s sake it’s not enjoying life if it kills you! it’s not being happy if it’s self-destruction! the world sucks and that is frustrating, it is miserably depressing to have to live with, but it is still worth trying to stay alive, it is still worth having some hope, and please don’t throw away your future because you can’t believe in it ever getting better than this; please, i am trying to make it better than this, i am fucking working on it, i will promise you a future, if you would only believe me.

but she doesn’t believe him, and neither does yura, who has been drowning in despair since long before he even lost kt, and as it turns out neither does olya, because she’s just sacrificed herself too, and so easily.

BUT LIKE. THE THING IS. none of this remotely excuses what he did to katya! sure, he was worried she was dangerous, but you can’t sic a SWAT team on a thirteen-year-old regardless of how bad she gives you the heebie-jeebies. even if it was an accident you should at least feel guilty about it. sure, you are trying to keep people safe, but that’s no excuse to fuck other people over. and yet he doesn’t even think about this in strike 3; he mentions her once, as ‘the monster’, as a failing of yura’s (funnily enough this isn’t not how yura thinks of the incident.) and that’s it. he never even stops to consider her as a person.

and that’s why the perspective work is so fucking good: because of course he wouldn’t! that’s why he could call her in. he was seeing her as a danger, not as a girl, not as something comparable to his little sister. it’s his song, it’s his point of view. and while he is tormented by his tense relationship with sanya - by the way he can’t seem to get through to any of the people he cares about - when it comes to that decision it has never even occurred to him that he might have done anything wrong

[brw]

002 — ScarletVision (it’s ur brand I HAD to 💖)

When I started shipping them

Honestlyyy I cant remember </3 they just have given me brainworms for the past 5 or so years n I have to deal w/ it <3 I guess I just thot that Vision was cool n they're such an iconic pairing that you sort of have to come across them at some point

My thoughts

ONE of the premier comic book relationships. theyre iconic theyre groundbreaking theyre so special and dramatic and have my whole heart. i can't personally think of a single relationship that has the range they do. theyre ur embarrassing het parents theyre the friendship of a gay man and lesbian they are a t4t lesbian power couple they are having a fight in a car park they are star crossed lovers whos fates are entertwined and the fact that their romance happened goes against all odds. they r so special.

What makes me happy about them

the fact that they STILL love each other they still are very close friends they made a LIFE together and they remember and respect that and love each other for it and even though theyre much different now they still have so much respect for one another i love their constant growth. strangers to being so fragily in love with each other to becoming stronger + standing by one another as they become the best versions of themselves, building a life together away from the avengers, the tragedy that struck them and the fact that they managed to rebuild past that and remain good friends. they r SO. thinking about them daily. they were KIDS IN LOVE they didnt deserve this :(

What makes me sad about them

everything john byrne did </3 set the WORST prescent for them it makes me so enraged that ppl still use it as evidence they shouldn't have been together they were SO in love prior to that vision got violated against their will and thats not their fault!!! n the fact that people can't let them rest.... WEIRD WRITERS R NOT THESE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS RESPONSIBILITY PLEASE STOP ACTING LIKE IT IS! SOBBING.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me

definitely ppl who recontextualise their relationship to be manipulative or abusive on vision's part saw that kind of idea in the 616 SV tag n i was so :/ just. dont use the tag lol. anyway finding anything centered on them that isn't mcu based is ridiculously hard so. that ig. vision with binary pronouns. i struggle a lot if u couldn't tell.

Things I look for in fanfic

genderqueer vision at the TOP of that list but definitely like,,, stuff that has clear references i guess. like i like some continuity i like being able to tell which comic issue it happened during i like being Specific!! uhhhh wanda being explictly jewish in like holiday celebrations is always a plus :0000 and if the avengers r there definitely a non mcu lineup. where r jan and hank.

My wishlist

ngl not sure what this means but assuming it means like, wishes for them, i guess uhhh. polyamory. literally it is 2022 no more ship wars. they r dating everyone. my wish is that they get back together but have an open / poly relationship.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other

DEFINITELY scarletvoodoo & visionmantis. wanda & jericho r SO SO SO soft they are so important scarletvision endgame but i do actually need more content of them so badly. there is so much more to explore how does jericho vibe w/ tommy & billy!! they were moving in together what does their house look like!! what is their morning routine!!! please let me know!!and visionmantis bc they are just also so soft.... autistic nonbinary lesbian 4 autistic nonbinary lesbian. she is green they r red it is a perfect combo. they understand each other on a deeper level, like they understand each other's emotions & outlook more than other ppl n i really want that explored. they only broke up canonically bc vision could not get pregnant!! we can fix that its the future. bring them back to me.

My happily ever after for them

AGAIN polyamory. they have so many hands. getting back together getting remarried but like. explictly as their updated selves. we CANNOT regress we need to look forward it has to be brought out of respect for what their pasts r and what their futures would look like together has to be a writer that actually cares abt them please nothing to do w/ wendyshow i could not handle it. i know it will not happen in a way that i want but i can dream!!

ask game for fandoms, ships & characters.

[maydaymemer]

IO Blackout

I just beat the worst featured contract in Hitman 3 and wanted to talk about it and IO’s handling of the “live” aspect of the new game

It feels to me that this is the Hitman game least necessary to have this live model: 1 & 2 offered pretty regular live stuff, 2016 most of all had 26 ETs (limited time missions set in the main levels but with new voice acting and other changes), a couple of challenge packs (basically themed achievements that unlocked an item) and I wanna say 40+ escalations (multi stage missions set in the levels with little modification). Plus the levels were released monthly. WoA2 had less, six ETs and 30+ escalations. I think it had way more challenge packs tho weirdly. Two per location rather than one. It was still pretty steady. Now it feels like IO don’t want to do more Hitman, they feel like they’re done but there’s sort of an obligation there for them to do it and they don’t want to have no defence for the always online so they’re still doing it

Escalations are now being locked behind paywalls. Thirteen of them to be precise, almost half of Hitman 2’s output. And they’re now treated as like main events since challenge packs are now gone, which isn’t a big loss but considering how difficult it is now to level up a location to 20 mastery we could’ve done with some. In Hitman 1 & 2 we got these holiday themed bonus missions with their own challenges. For Easter we got an escalation, I like escalations a lot and this one was good but they’re 20 minute distractions

And because I feel like there’s a drought of newly released stuff to do there’s a bigger chance of burnout. The levels themselves are great and replayable but this side stuff helps recontextualise the maps but also learn them more for playing thru the main missions. So because of this I’ve actually started playing the featured contracts as they released, whereas with Hitman 2 I only played them occasionally usually after building a backlog of them

Featured Contracts are player made missions in the main levels. You kill someone with a knife in a plumber outfit, then publish it only where other people have to kill someone in a plumber outfit and get the best score. Featured Contracts is where IO picks ten fan-made Contracts per month that they like and puts them on the front menu of the game and makes them multi platform, playable to everyone

However there’s two problems with featured contracts in Hitman 3: they not made by fans and curated by IO. They’re made by “influencers” and curated by those same influencers. Number two is there’s barely any of them. The featured contracts are in batches of five instead of ten and they’re made with a more limited map pool. One month in Hitman 2 could have ten contracts in ten different locations, whereas most featured contracts so far are five contracts in Dubai, then five in Dartmoor, etc. There hasn’t been a single contract in Berlin yet, the best one

The influencers thing is the big problem however because it’s so obvious that it’s just a cross promotion and very few of the people making the contracts care for Hitman. Because the contracts are really bad, usually

When Easy Allies did a batch they ended up making the worst contract ever, called Media Blackout. It seems simple, kill five people with an SMG as a guard without knocking anybody out. There’s a silenced SMG in the Chongqing level, all the targets are close together, but there’s no way to get a guard disguise without knocking out or killing a guard. People found a glitch where if you fire a guard and wait ten minutes for him to commit suicide you can bump into him and “kill” him without losing silent assassin. The actual kill portion of the contract is five minutes, but it takes ten to 20 to get a disguise. It’s pretty obvious someone from Easy Allies just made a contract where they shot a bunch of people, randomly picked their targets and then decided to shove on “no knockouts” at the end of making it

I heard there was a livestream Easy Allies did where they played their own contracts and just Ramboed everything, so none of their contracts were probably SAed to start with, and this lack of quality control could be fixed by IO just saying “make sure your contracts in this stealth game can actually be completed with stealth first”

Another example of amusing incompetence is when one of the sites had “don’t get recorded by a camera” as a modifier in Dartmoor. Dartmoor is the only main level of the trilogy without any security cameras

I think it’s kind of ironic that a feature that’s meant to encourage fan engagement is now being used to promote websites like EuroGamer, Easy Allies and Kinda Funny. Basically the opposite of the kind of people Hitman fans follow. Just a shame, and now Achievement Hunter is doing a batch. I’m sure that’ll go well and not be unplayably disastrous

The game itself is excellent, and I understand Covid has impacted the team a lot but I don’t agree with the decisions that aren’t impacted by the pandemic like relying on journos/unrelated youtubers for Contracts rather than the fans. All in all it proves the theory that every IO game itself is excellent BUT they’re really bad at maintaining goodwill with them. A good game is usually followed with a ton of shite business practices

I feel like with Hitman 1 & 2 being released in parts (Season one was episodic, while the sequel had two whole DLC levels released a year later which continued the story) but Hitman III being released who it’ll be level wise forever, there’s no reason to have this always online live model. Because the live model isn’t really alive, it’s just one new ET and one new escalation rn where you could just add those two in the monthly patch. It’s not like the previous two where there would be two to four escalations, a challenge pack and an ET every month. Not that this episodic always online BS was ever justified, but now it’s pretty nakedly pointless

[freyjawriter24]

Advent Omens: Wish

It might be a couple of months late, but here’s my response to Day 19 of @drawlight‘s advent prompt list from last year. Enjoy!

-----

The night was bitterly cold, his breath freezing into clouds as soon as it left the haven of his corporation, and Aziraphale was wrapped up in as many layers of warmth as possible. Thick coat, tartan scarf and matching mittens, even a hat to keep his ears warm.

He wasn’t entirely sure why he’d left the bookshop at all, but he’d felt he needed a walk, so he had. It was late – or rather early – enough that even in the middle of London, there was pretty much nobody else around. Perfect for walking and thinking.

There was... a lot to think about, if he was honest with himself. A lot that he hardly dared think about, and yet now couldn’t avoid for much longer. A lot that he didn’t ever want to deal with, and that he was scared he would never have to. A lot of complications, in short. A lot of conflict.

He walked the streets of Soho first, past the corner he had waited on for Crowley to finish planning his obliteration-trap of a mission, past the bakery they’d both had croissants at together when it first opened, past the place where he’d bumped into a red-faced Crowley once, the demon holding flowers and chocolates like he had over a century prior, muttering something about missing the anniversary but still wanting to celebrate, if you’ll have me. The result had been a quiet night in at the bookshop, and then Crowley had left, and he hadn’t seen him again for a decade (off in New York, apparently, making the most of the flapper dresses and prohibition), and then they’d met up in St James’ Park to update one another on human affairs from the last seventy years, and then he hadn’t seen him again until the church.

Aziraphale swallowed, his mind automatically wanting to skip over that particular memory, but he wouldn’t let it. Not right now.

The church. Crowley had walked on consecrated ground for him, to save him the fuss and bother of being discorporated and having to acquire a new body. He’d come to distract and bomb the Nazis – and they’d known who he was, which was a detail he hadn’t fully appreciated at the time – and he did so, and he’d asked Aziraphale to save them, and then he’d remembered the books...

It was cold and clear out, and the water running down his cheeks caught the breeze and made him shiver, so he wiped it away. He saved the books. That was what Aziraphale couldn’t get over, that was the moment he’d been suddenly dropped into a void and realised the truth, that was the instant his entire world changed and there was no going back now, not ever.

That night recontextualised so much of their relationship – his own reaction to Crowley’s request for holy water, for one – and it was terrifying in a way that he, even with all his books and words and knowledge of the entire history of language, couldn’t fully articulate.

It had taken him twenty-six years to go from that realisation to giving Crowley what he’d asked for all that time ago, and it felt like he was strapped to the side of a rocket, bulleting through the atmosphere faster than should be possible, faster than the grip of gravity.

I love you, Aziraphale had said, though not in so many words, and I’m sorry.

I’ll wait for you, the demon had replied, without actually saying so. As long as it takes, angel. As long as you need.

And that was why he loved him.

Aziraphale hadn’t really been paying much attention to his surroundings for a while, and had somehow ended up in Hyde Park. It was strange, seeing a place so usually full of life – families with children, dogs, teenagers messing around together, elderly couples sharing a quiet moment – so completely, utterly still. It was silent, and the moonlight made the frosted grass shine silver, and it was beautiful, so beautiful.

He wished Crowley could see it, too. He always wished that, whenever he saw a scene as wonderful as this. He liked having someone to share the memory with.

Aziraphale hadn’t seen the demon in months, after he’d given him the holy water – until yesterday, when he’d arrived, chipper as anything, and offered to take him out for lunch. And that was why the angel needed to think so hard now.

He’d been scared. Scared that the unthinkable had happened without him knowing. Scared that he’d somehow irrevocably broken their relationship by his refusal to go further now. Maybe he’d misinterpreted that look, those words, everything he’d imagined was between them. He’d been terrified.

And then Crowley had appeared at the bookshop door, smiling and tempting him to lunch and acting like everything was normal, like nothing had happened, and Aziraphale had been relieved, so deeply, deeply relieved, and he’d been swept up in the afternoon’s events and the joy of Crowley being alive, and then the demon had said his goodbyes and left. And Aziraphale was left shaking. 

He hadn’t understood his own reaction, at first. He had sat heavily on the sofa, in Crowley’s spot, still warm from the demon lounging there a matter of minutes beforehand, and he’d tried to convince his hammering heart that Crowley was still alive. He’s okay, it’s okay, what are you panicking about? He’s fine. You’re fine. We’re fine. Why are you so scared?

The problem was, any confirmation that Crowley was currently fine was rendered void as soon as he was out of sight. The problem was, Aziraphale didn’t know where the holy water was, and couldn’t take it back. The problem was, everything was out of his control, and he couldn’t protect him, and anything could happen, and that was terrifying.

Even looking at these thoughts from a distance, after the panic attack was over, was exhausting. Aziraphale chose a patch of grass in the centre of the park and sank slowly to sit amongst the frozen blades, breathing heavily.

You’re okay. It’s fine. Just breathe.

The angel sat on the cold ground in the middle of a silent London, and focused on trying to slow his heartbeat down to a reasonable pace. Never could control the heart right, could you? You ridiculous angel. Just breathe.

When eventually the shaking stopped and the clouds his lungs were making in the air had time to fade between each new breath, he dared look up. Up, up, far up, until he was leaning back on the grass and staring up into the abyss of the sky above.

This was terrifying in its own way. For a moment, he could feel the vastness of the Earth beneath him, and the impossibly, infinitely greater vastness of the universe above and around them both. Huge, colossal, unfathomable.

No. You are not a human – you are an angel. You could fill this universe, if you wanted to – choose to fly to the moon, live among the stars, feel the nebulae through your feathers, if you wanted to. You are as impossible as anything else in creation. It has no right to scare you. You should scare it.

He focused on the stars. Crowley had helped craft these, once upon a time. He’d told him once, under a sky like this. He’d pointed to constellations, and Aziraphale had listened in spellbound silence. The demon had listed their names, told little stories about their existence, lit up with the memory of how it felt to have the stars in the palms of his hands.

“Which one is nearest? Which is most interesting? Which one is your favourite?”

Crowley looked at him, and he felt the colour rise in his cheeks. Hopefully it was dark enough that the demon wouldn’t notice.

“That’s all the same answer,” he said, yellow eyes wide and almost glowing in the night. He pointed at a bright spot high above them. “Alpha Centauri.”

He told the angel about the binary star, how the two orbs of light perfectly balanced one another, how it had felt to spin them around one another and know they were intended to be together forever, how it had felt to be enacting the wonder of God’s Plan.

One of them had cried. Maybe both. Aziraphale couldn’t remember.

He lay there, staring up at the slowly revolving sky, remembering Crowley and trying to forget his worries about him. He certainly wasn’t crying now. No, definitely not.

A tune came to him, and he hummed it. It was apt, he supposed, and yet not really at all. Wishes were a strange thing to consider for an angel. Weren’t they just prayers, wished on stars instead of spoken to God?

He considered it for a while, and then decided on the difference, at least for him. Prayers were for other people – you were supposed to use them for important things like asking for someone to be forgiven, asking for someone to be kept safe, asking for someone to be blessed with a good life. Wishes were more selfish – they were for yourself, the things not worth addressing to God, because they were only about you.

He prayed for Crowley. Softly, unofficially, as it were – he didn’t use the circle that had been chalked under the rug in the bookshop since it opened, he didn’t request any official acknowledgment for his words to God, he wasn’t even sure if they were received. But he thought the words anyway, and had done for a long while, now. Please, let him have a good life. Please, keep him safe. Please, forgive him. He never got an answer.

But wishes... wishes weren’t told to anyone. That was the point – they were secret, private, just for you. There was even a superstition that if you ever told anyone what you’d wished for, it wouldn’t come true. That was the difference.

Aziraphale closed his eyes and wished. He wished for a better life, for a world where Heaven and Hell didn’t care what they did together, where they were free to live on and look after the Earth without interference, where they could do the things he’d said he’d wanted to in the Bentley, without fear. He wished that Crowley was here, now, and understood, and would be gentle with him and not push, and he knew that he didn’t even need to wish for that part, because it would be true regardless. Crowley never pushed him, not really. He was kind and patient and gentle, and that was right at the heart of the whole thing.

He sighed, and opened his eyes, and sat up. Wishes didn’t come true, either, even if you didn’t tell anyone. Prayers did, sometimes. But wishes only came true by coincidence. Side effect of them not being addressed to a Higher Authority, probably.

The angel sat there for a while longer, looking up at the stars, waiting for them to fade and the dawn to come.

And then he heard someone move, off to the side, somewhere a long way behind him.

The person hesitated, then began to walk slowly towards him. Aziraphale could hear the footsteps as the being crunched over the icy grass, and recognised the gait. He closed his eyes for a moment. Then turned to greet the demon as he arrived just beside his left shoulder.

“Hello, my dear.”

“Uh, hi, angel. Err... Not interrupting, am I?”

“No, my dear. Not at all.”

Crowley sank down to the ground beside him, legs drawn up to his chest and arms around them, his silhouette oddly small, even as the angles were sharp and familiar.

“You okay, angel?”

“Mmm. Just thinking.”

Crowley nodded, and followed his gaze upwards.

“We could sit here forever, if you wanted to.”

“No, we couldn’t, my dear. Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I could freeze time. We could make our home here, in this one moment, in this night.”

He didn’t dare get his hopes up. “We couldn’t. They’d find us.”

Crowley looked at him for a long moment. Then his golden eyes flicked away, upwards, and he nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he said, suddenly brave, suddenly determined. “It was a lovely idea.”

Now, Crowley didn’t look at him. His eyes were covered with those ever-present sunglasses. But he spoke all the same.

“I’m sorry, angel. I should have called, I should have let you know I was okay. I just... didn’t want to intrude. Wanted to give you space, you know? But I’m sorry if I upset you because of that.”

Aziraphale nodded up at the stars, and didn’t look at the demon even as the demon dared a glance at him. “Thank you, my dear.”

“For what? Apologising?”

“For understanding.”

They stayed like that a while longer, a frozen moment in the darkness of the winter night. That tune came back to him again, and Aziraphale hummed it into the night air.

When you wish upon a star, Makes no difference who you are...

When you wish upon a star, Your dreams come true.

[theflashdriver]

A Fool's Efforts

This is a little something written for White Day, a holiday where individuals return the favour of gifts given on valentines. It’s a little over 4,400 words and full of Silvaze. I hope you enjoy!

Following Valentines Silver has vanished and Blaze is struggling to figure out why. As bad as her chocolates were, they couldn't have scared him away... could they? Has she made some other fatal misstep? This is set in the Sol Dimension but doesn't particularly utilise its setting, instead almost falling into a modern-day AU style story.

Anxiety was brewing within Blaze, anxiousness of a strength and flavour she hadn't experienced before. Three weeks had passed since Valentine's Day, and yet she's gone two weeks barely seeing her Valentine. He always seemed to have somewhere else to be and something else to do. Before that day their contact had been nonstop, spending hours together almost every day, but in the past two weeks, Blaze couldn't have spent more than three hours with him. This week they'd met only once! That was Monday, today was already Sunday, it was completely surreal. What was Silver up to? Why had he changed like this? Had she done something wrong?

Blaze had taken a walk to clear her head, a simple stroll through the city, but those thoughts polluted her mind. He'd settled into the Sol over the past couple of years, living with and looking after Marine, but in all that time he'd never acted like this. In all the time she'd known him, he'd never acted like this. Was it because of Valentine's? Had she taken a step too far forward; made an advance he didn't reciprocate and ruined their partnership? No, it couldn't be. Before these weeks though, she'd been sure her pining was mutual. If anything Valentine's had only further cemented that. It was so strange, he'd been overjoyed before dissolving into a blushing mess of a hedgehog she could still see in her mind's eye. Even the week following Valentine's had been wonderful, what would once be two friends spending time together shifted a degree more romantic, having meals together and spending time in the castle library.

The closest to a potential cause had been her gift. She'd made him chocolates, resigning a solid week of effort to the task in an attempt to offset her awful cooking skills. Truth be told, judging by the final product, she'd been foolish to think a single week was enough. While they'd ended up roughly heart-shaped they'd tasted closer to charcoal than chocolate. Try as she might to find a better gift they all seemed imperfect, too impersonal, so she'd handed over the best of that embarrassing attempt. Despite its imperfection though her gift surely wasn't the issue. He'd been so thankful when she'd presented them and even fought through their horrendous taste to finish the entire box, regardless of her protesting.

Silver wasn't a good enough liar to have faked his gratefulness, let alone his joy the following week. For all the time she'd known him the hedgehog's heart had been firmly fastened to his cuff. He'd to lie about not being scared or try to hide his tears, but his body would always betray him. He'd insist far too much, trying not to look her in the eye; he'd done such as he swore the chocolates were good. That'd been the last time he'd lied to her; something else was amiss.

She came to a stop, she'd been so lost in her thoughts that she'd rather lost her position. A quick glance to her surroundings quickly rectified that; she was near the edge of the city. The area was mostly residential but she'd come here with him quite a few times, one of the houses had been converted into a café that made some of the best cakes in town. It'd been their last date before he became scarce; he had such a sweet tooth. She supposed they hadn't really discussed it; whether or not they were actually dating. It'd just, kind of, happened, she'd just kind of assumed that outing was a date. Their outings had been recontextualised in her mind, but had they in his?

Blaze had turned to wander home when she felt something roll down the back of her ear. She glanced to the sky only to find it grey, droplets were beginning to fall and here she was; without a jacket and a solid mile from the castle. She could conjure flames to mitigate the rain but doing that among people wasn't the best idea. Warm light was ebbing from the café's windows, beaconing her to enter. Seeing little other option she forced herself inside, prepared to face warm light and the scent of coffee. The scent and light were indeed inside but they were far from the first thing to catch her attention.

Silver was here, not sitting at a table but behind the counter; eyes closed and his chin rested in his palm as he leaned against the worktop. An apron obscured much of his chest fur, as she approached she sighted the nametag attached to it. His form was already unmistakable, from his quills to his glowing hands, but she read that label three times to confirm what she was seeing. Silver had gotten a job? Not only that, Silver was working here? She glanced around the café's inside, being so small and out of the way she was the only customer. If there were other employees they must have been in the back, they were all alone out here.

His quills had tumbled from their usual upright formation to messily lie upon his face; gently parting them revealed heavy black bags beneath his eyes. Her brow hardened further. He'd gained a job and lost sleep? However he'd been spending his time, he'd clearly been pushing himself too hard. As she gently brushed back his quills, trying to return them to their regular position, Blaze felt him shift; hand dropping to fully lean against her.

She shifted her grasp, taking his cheek in her hand, and leaned in to half-whisper. "Silver, what on earth are you doing here?"

Yellow eyes slowly flickered open, slowly regaining their light as he dizzily looked up to her. He mumbled something unintelligible, briefly closing only to snap back open as he recognised her. The hedgehog shot up straight and very nearly headbutted her chin.

"B-Blaze, what're you doing here? W-Welcome?" His voice was hoarse, lack of sleep had affected more than his outward appearance.

Already he was struggling to meet her serious stare, "Why didn't you tell me you got a job? I've hardly seen you the past two weeks."

"W-Well… um…" His vision flickered from her back down to the counter. "I needed money and I saw an advertisement so I just... g-got one?"

The feline's brow only furrowed further, "You needed money?

"Y-Yeah, I just needed money. That's all." He wasn't giving proper answers; Blaze felt her blood begin to freeze. Why wasn't he? Did he need money at all?

As worry further grew she felt her ears fold back, "Silver, what did you need the money for?"

"N-Nothing important. Just a silly thing." His fingers were fidgeting, almost rapping against the surface. "Y-Yeah, it's just for something silly. Nothing really important, b-but as unimportant as it is it's expensive so… i-its just taken a lot of time." Overemphasising the point, Blaze knew he was lying but she couldn't read his mind. Whatever it was, it wasn't small and it wasn't silly; at least not to him.

"As long as it's not too ridiculous you know I'd help you, especially if it matters enough to hide it. You're clearly working yourself to death." When his response wasn't immediate she lowered her hands to the counter, "What is this really about?"

Though she couldn't quite see, his eyes were surely locked on her hands. "I-I… I just…" Silver's head lowered further, quills had tumbled into his face as he fumbled for words. They were getting nowhere. She'd never seen him like this. It was like her heart had stopped, everything around them forgotten as her mind pursued some kind of conclusion. As much as she tried to avoid the thought, explain it away, Valentine's wouldn't leave her mind. He hadn't lied then, but had his stance changed since?

"Silver, look at me." She heard the bite in her own voice but, despite it, he did as she asked. The worry was plain in his face, even through downed quills. This was so unlike him, surely that meant something was wrong. Her fists clenched as she heaved a sigh, steadying herself. It was best to get it over with. She'd had to know before her worry grew any further, "Was Valentine's a mistake, have I pushed our partnership too far?"

"Wh-What? No! I-I'm here because …" Words seemed to fail him for a moment, quills flew from his face as he took her fists in his hand. She could see the panic in his eyes, eyes that hadn't left her. "Valentine's day wasn't a mistake. You've done nothing wrong, i-it's just I-I..." Just as he was about to lose his metal she felt his grip grow tighter, bright yellow eyes bore into her amber ones. "I wanted to match your effort!"

It took a moment to process, worry driving her to scrutinise every word, but with his eyes locked to hers, she could tell he wasn't lying. His heart was on his sleeve in it showed he was too scared to lie. This wasn't her fault, a wave of relief swept through her but hadn't washed away all of her worries. He still looked awful and he hadn't explained himself. "What do you mean match my effort?"

Blaze felt her hands lift from the woodwork, still held in his tight grip. "I… just…" His vision darted from her for a moment but he shook it from himself before she could call it out, "White day's so soon and I really wanted to make it up to you, b-but I don't have any money and i-it'd be wrong to use your money to get you a gift." He leaned in the bags beneath his eyes became all the more clear, "I-I wanted to surprise you like you surprised me."

He'd tried to explain himself but while she understood he wanted to get her a gift Blaze didn't understand why. What was this White Day? Why was he so set on surprising her on it? Her grip shifted to hold his hands but Blaze couldn't quite unfurrow her brow, not yet at least. "Surprise me? How long were you going to keep this up, what's White Day?"

"W-Wait, you don't know what White Day is?" The hedgehog's face paled. "I-I thought… d-does White Day not exist in this dimension?"

"I've never heard of it before but, Silver," She maintained her stare, she had to know. "How long were you going to do this?"

"Just to the end of this week, I figured I'd have enough for something by then. I thought you'd have already guessed what I was doing and not mind. That you'd be surprised I did so much, not that I vanished in the first place." Fear vanished, quickly replaced with concern as guilt overtook his face. She swore water was welling within his eyes. Weakness, brought on by tiredness, had clearly compounded with regret. "I-I wouldn't have done it if I thought it'd worry you, I-I'm so sorry Blaze."

Her shoulders lowered, she felt her ears flick upright. Blaze brushed her thumb over his. It wasn't perfect, but he'd alleviated the worst of her worries. She still had questions and he clearly wanted to give answers but they ought to do this properly. Blaze turned from him to glance behind her, double-checking the café was empty, before making a proposal. "Do you want to sit down and talk about this?"

"Y-Yeah, ok." She allowed a small smile to creep onto her face, as it did (though regret was plain in his eyes) she watched his disposition slightly brighten. "I can make us some tea, get some cake a-and explain all of this."

"I think I'd like that." Her smile grew and with it, further anxiety was eaten away. Their grip released but she didn't turn away yet. She reached across, wiping away a potential tear. "I'll see you at our usual spot, don't take too long."

Blaze felt him lean into her touch again, "I won't, I promise."

With that she turned, making her way toward their spot. Rather than regular seating the café exclusively used couches and tea tables to give a more homely feel. Their usual place was off in the far corner of the establishment, next to a fireplace set to roar in the winter. The table was low, made of mahogany and marked by mug stains, while the couch they sprawled upon was made of a fuzzy, dark green, material. She slid over to the far seat, beginning to collect her thoughts.

While he'd been an idiot it at least sounded like he was a well-intentioned idiot… her well-intentioned, naïve, idiot. Despite her smile, she wasn't content, not yet at least. If he couldn't properly explain himself then her worry would undoubtedly regrow but she trusted that he'd do his best. Hopefully, after this, they could return to normal. Well, they'd have to find their new normal first. Whatever that was.

As he approached she finally saw his full change in wardrobe, quickly scanning him up and down. To go with the black apron they'd given him a pair of old dress shoes, they were a little battered around the edges but had been polished so at a glance they looked new. Blaze thought his cheeks were red from tears but quickly sighted pinkness at the tip of his ears, evidently, her staring had embarrassed him. There was something cute about it, both the outfit and seeing him so flustered. If it weren't for the bags beneath his eyes, fighting his blush for space, she'd have probably told him. As long as those black marks lingered so would the seed of her worry.

He utilised his psychokinesis, with a wave of his hand lowering the pot and mugs before a slice of cake gently landed before her. Coffee cake, the treat she'd order when she rarely indulged in sweets. Of course, he knew her well enough to pick her favourite. He cast her a pensive glance, setting a much too sugary apple slice down in front of his spot, before taking his place. The hedgehog didn't lean back, despite his tired body clearly wanting to.

"Where do you want me to start?"

"First, how did you get like this? I can't believe this job is keeping you up all night. Is that to do with this White Day too?"

"Oh, w-well, actually," He gripped his arm, "When I said I got a job… that was a lie. I-I wanted to get you something really good so I got two."

Her eyes widened, "What do you mean you got two jobs?! Silver you can't…" While she was about to scold him for being so stupid Blaze was rather overwhelmed by the pace of her heartbeat and a newfound heat on her face. They hadn't been together for a month. Well, they'd know each other for years and years, but they'd hardly been together romantically! Sure they'd danced around that fact long before Valentines, there had been glances and hugs that went on much too long, but he was willing to go so far so soon? "Y-You shouldn't have done that! It's no wonder you fell asleep standing!" Blaze, quickly realising how loud she was being, turned away in an attempt to cool off. No matter the gift he was working toward, him going to such an effort was far more valuable. Stupid, yes, but valuable. "W-What's the other job?"

"I-I thought it'd be good with my power, so I asked around at construction sites and managed to get some part-time work moving supplies." Blaze felt him shift, undoubtedly leaning in closer as she'd turned away. "I was sure it'd be easy but I guess I ended up too much."

Construction work!? He really had been working himself to death, between that and the hours the café was open he'd have hardly had time to sleep. It was no wonder she'd hardly seen him, had he even eaten properly? "Regardless of how much you wanted to surprise me, you shouldn't have gone that far. I don't want you hurting yourself. How many hours were you working?"

"I work here from eight till three and then spend as much time as I can helping on a construction site." He explained, "I've been trying to do five hours there but after the first week I haven't really managed." Blaze felt his hand gently top hers, finally, she turned back to face him. "I just wanted to match your gift so badly, I didn't care how tired I was."

Hearing the regret in his voice she couldn't help but turn over her hand to hold his, as she did she felt their knees collide; what little of her blush had faded returned in full force. "My chocolates were practically worthless Silver, they certainly weren't worth two weeks of work."

"You'd never made chocolate before though, right? You put in real effort there and even past that, by making you took a step I was too scared to. You furthered our relationship." She watched him finally lean back against the couch, almost beginning to relax. "Besides, I ate them, all didn't I? They were better than you think."

Embarrassed as she was, Blaze couldn't help but roll her eyes, gently kicking his foot. "No more lies. I saw your face after the first one, you wolfed down the rest to try and mask it. You're lucky you didn't choke."

Silver raised his free hand and their tea began to pour itself. "R-Regardless, what you did had a lot of value to me and as part of White Day, I'm supposed to double or triple that. That's why I got two jobs, I really wanted to surprise you but at the very least I want to get you something to match that." His face had taken on a look of seriousness, "So, despite everything, even if White Day doesn't exist here, I still want to get you something. I-Is that ok?"

"If you're really set on getting me something that's fine, but no more working like that. No more hurting yourself." She made sure to emphasise that. No matter how he explained it, nor how it felt hearing he'd done so much, she wouldn't let him work himself to death. "What even is White Day?"

"Oh it's just a little holiday thing, it's really not important." He seemed almost embarrassed but, following another teasing kick, words began to spill forth. "I read about it when I lived in the future. It's called White Day because people give gifts that are white or in white boxes rather than the red associated with Valentine's. " He explained, "It's an answer to Valentine's Day. If someone got you a gift on Valentine's but you didn't get them anything a month later you're supposed to return that effort. White Day gifts are meant to be more than twice the value of those given before, t-to make up for the lost time I guess. By furthering our relationship you did something really important to me, a-and I didn't think I could do anything three times its worth, so I wanted to at least try to match it."

As he explained Blaze, fairly quickly, came to understand his mistake. Being from a destroyed world Silver had only read about events and traditions, he'd never actually experienced them. When Sol had their winter festival he'd assumed snow was a guaranty, he had a habit of either taking traditions literally or at the very least having an idealised version of them. This was no different.

"You're so naïve, you shouldn't try to equate monetary and personal value. Despite how bad my chocolate was, it clearly meant a lot to you due to the effort behind it. I feel the same about what you've done." She tried to explain, "Knowing how much my gift meant to you and knowing you'd go to such lengths means more to me than any gift could, foolish as that was."

Raising his effort again seemed to embarrass him further; he sunk deeper into the couch. "You're right, I-I guess I lost myself in the spirit of it. I wouldn't have done it if I knew White Day didn't exist here, I'm sorry Blaze."

She squeezed his hand, "You didn't notice no one else was preparing? No advertisements, no one talking about it?"

His blush grew even brighter; she heard the plinking of sugar cubes and clinking of teaspoons within their cups. "I kind of let myself get too busy to notice, outside meals I've hardly even talked to Marine. She knew what I was doing but… I guess she just didn't know any better either." He reached beneath his apron to tug at his chest fur, "That or she thought it was funny. I worked myself to the bone, didn't spend time on other things."

Their hands parted as he floated across their teacups. He'd dropped two sugar cubes in hers, as he knew she took it, and six had taken residence in his cup. "There are better ways to go about it, learning a skill to share or finding a gift that shows how much you know me rather than caring about whether it's valuable."

He seemed to fully relax, his smile growing to match hers, only for a puzzled look to briefly cross his face. "What do you mean sharing a skill?"

"Like taking someone to do something they never have before or making them something you hope they'd enjoy. I suppose that's why chocolate is a popular Valentine's Day gift," The feline half reflected and half explained, "Most people like it but don't know how to make it, they have to invest time and learn for another person. It shows a commitment."

Despite the explanation, he was still deep in thought. Curious as she was Blaze took a sip of her tea lest it cool, he was probably just taking in her words and planning something. By the time her mug lowered he'd gone from looking confused to quite embarrassed. The second she caught his eye Silver quickly raised his mug, taking an overlarge drink, and when it finally lowered his face had turned from pink to red.

Silver attempted to speak at least three times but on each occasion the hedgehog clearly found himself tongue-tied, returning a very empty cup to his lips. On what seemed to be his fourth attempt, just before she could start chuckling, he managed to blurt out a question, "I-I guess then, seeing as it doesn't exist here, I can give you my gift whenever rather than on that day, right?"

Blaze blinked at that, she didn't know what she'd expected but it hadn't been that. Perhaps that he had some idea or no idea, maybe that he'd keep thinking about it, but he not only had an idea but some idea of when he'd be ready to present the gift? Surely he planned to learn a skill rather than take on more jobs,

The cat managed to push aside her curiosity, nodding to him. "Yes, take all the time you need."

"Oh, I-I meant it'd be done sooner rather than later. I-I guess I could do it on the day too but..." Intrigue broke free of her control but before she could ask an object floated into her vision; it was the coffee cake, set atop its plate. Thick, wet looking, dark brown sponge with a layer of beige icing in its centre and a thicker layer on top. Crumbled walnuts and diced cherries topped the external icing layer in a generous, but not overwhelming, manner. "I know it's your favourite so, while I was working here, I figured I should learn how to make it."

It took her less than a moment to process. Cup set in her lap she plucked the saucer from the air. "Y-You made this?"

Blaze felt the heat on her face, her heart had returned to that overwhelming rate. Since his arrival in civilisation Silver had found a hobby in cooking, mostly for Marine and on occasion Blaze herself, but she couldn't recall him baking before. He had learned an entirely new craft for her, while working himself to death no less. She hadn't been able to tell his version of the cake from that of prior visits, even this close it both smelled and looked exactly as she remembered.

"Y-Yeah, it should taste right? Coffee's still a bit strong for me so I'm not certain b-but…" Seriousness broke through embarrassment, his hands clenched into fists. "If it doesn't I'll keep practising until it does, I promise!"

Lifting her dessertspoon Blaze carved off the left corner, managing to procure a sizable chunk. The taste was exactly as she remembered, no; it was better than that. The coffee flavour was perfect, neither overwhelming nor underwhelming, and the softness of the sponge was great, but understanding the effort that had gone into it seemed to catalyse her taste buds. Watching him try not to stare, bashfully turning away to collect his own cake, and understanding the effort he'd put in only added to her enjoyment. She could taste his effort, even stupidly overburdened and surely tired to his wit's end he'd learned to make this because she liked it; even ignoring his own distaste for the bitter flavour. Without knowing he'd done exactly as he should have in the first place.

As her spoon returned to the plate Blaze could see the sweat on his brow. His apple slice was floating untouched in the air, eyes were locked on his lap and his right hand was rising to tug at his chest fur.

Before his fingers could land she gently reached across, fingers lacing between his. His eyes flickered to hers. While she was certain blush still lingered on his cheeks it was undoubtedly more prominent on his. "It's perfect Silver."

"I-I'm glad you like it, Blaze," Though relief washed over him the compliment only empowered his stutter, "Th-Thank you."

"For what? I should be the one thanking you."

"I-It's just… I messed up so much trying to fulfil a tradition that doesn't even exists, you've put up with a lot and I worried you. I should have paid more attention to-

Blaze didn't let him finish; instead, she pushed the sugary slice through the air and into his mouth. As he swallowed she allowed a larger smile to cross her lips, "Thank you, Silver."

Silver, despite his blushing, managed to match her grin, "Y-You're welcome."

[thedreadvampy]

So Love, Death and Robots...

Ok, like the first 4 were all, in different ways, really pretty good, and there are a couple of other good offerings in the mix, although a lot of the otherwise good ones fumbled the landing a little and left me feeling slightly unsatisfied.

Sonnie’s Edge was a solid opener, not my favourite in the world (and the accents felt really fake if I’m honest - if you say they’re from Newcastle give your characters Geordie accents, you cowards, none of this ‘generic working class Brit’ bollocks), but the twists were good, the characters had some life to them, and while I am a biiit eeehhhhhh about the Rape As Backstory element, it wasn’t egregious and the story was well put together and rattled along at a fair pace. I would have liked a bit more information about where her anger came from, since she shrugs off the idea that it’s from her Traumatic Backstory, but that’s really my only criticism. Animation-wise I’m not the biggest fan of photorealistic scifi animation, and the monster designs are fine but not mindblowing, but it’s doing what it does solidly (although I don’t know why that one character has her tits all the way out in her regular costume, it’s a bit Teenage Boy Scifi but it’s still a cool costume and I like the blacklight effects). The theme for me here is competent - nothing in the story or the animation was stand-out exciting for me but it was all done well, paced well, animated and designed very well, but it all sort of hit a “good but not great” note for me if I’m honest.  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀

Three Robots was fun and engaging, if a bit superficial - it’s more of a series of stitched-together vignettes than a story, and other than the central characters, the world, and the cat very little connects the scenes, but that’s fine, it’s a worldbuilding exercise and it does what it’s doing pretty well. I really dig the character designs, especially the big blocky triangle robot - I’m a sucker for highly variable robots existing in the same world and I always appreciate effective non-humanoid character design. Also I did really enjoy the closing twist, that gave me a giggle. 4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 

The Witness was also really good but missing something. I loved the animation and character design, the comic book sound effects were occasionally a little clunky and distracting but the Comicsness of it was really working for me. I liked the story - it telegraphed part of the ending very deliberately but kept you guessing about the details and then pulled a pretty effective twist at the end anyway - and the characters managed to convey a lot of personality without a lot of explanation. There was a pleasing sense of inevitability to it, and while I kind of wanted a bit of explanation I think it was probably the right decision to leave it ambiguous. I did leave it feeling a little unsatisfied in an indefinable way, but looking back I think it would not have been made better by being any more explicit about what it was trying to convey.  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Suits, the one with the redneck mecha pilots, was far and away the tightest and most satisfyingly put together in the whole show for me - I liked the animation style a lot for it, it was funny and emotionally engaging, and while it wasn’t breaking much new ground it was beautifully paced, kept you invested and made you care about the characters, and was probably the only one which I had absolutely no complaints or lingering disappointments at all with. 5/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖🤖 .........aaaaaand then it all went wrong a bit for me because the episodes I genuinely solidly enjoyed got much fewer and further between as the bulk of stories got increasingly adolescent and superficial (I know, I know, it’s called Love, Death and Robots, it was always going to be a bit Teenage Boy, but the first 4 were all solid enough that I was feeling positive about it) Sucker of Souls was...fine. Characterful animation, uptempo pace, good character design (although GOD those ACCENTS, please stop and hire Actually British and Actually Irish voice actors if you’re planning on having British and Irish characters). It just felt completely hollow, though. Like, why do I care about this happening? Most of the characters are reasonably likeable if pretty stock, but the actual protagonist has nothing to him except Gruffly Macho Mercenary #4518B, and the plot is paper-thin and utterly unsatisfying. Monster exists, hubris of man raises monster, monster does something gratuitiously gory (if well-animated), people run away from monster, kill monster with guns and explosions, oh no what a twist we’re still in trouble, cut to black. And there was just nothing added to that, nothing clever or imaginative or unexpected, and the only twist they managed was that their Big Triumphal Moment was totally pointless. I thought they were going somewhere interesting with the cats thing and then it just got dropped and we went back to guns and explosions. I get doing something like this as a character piece but a) the characters just aren’t interesting enough to prop it up and b) the stakes aren’t balanced right for it to work (heh, stakes). It feels like this was just ‘I have a cool character design for Dracula and a couple of setpiece ideas’ and the whole short was just a vehicle for that, but while those things were cool they weren’t cool enough to make half an hour of TV feel worth it. It’s nice to see 2d animation but the animation style is only really ‘fine’ to me. This episode feels like someone really liked Hellboy but is not nearly as good a writer as Mike Mignola. 2/5 robots 🤖🤖💀💀💀 When The Yoghurt Took Over was fun enough. It didn’t have much more to it than ‘it would be funny if yoghurt took over the world’ but sometimes that’s enough. The animation’s cute and the idea is original enough to be funny and indepth enough to keep you engaged - I like a lot of the visual gags, even if they were a bit on the nose, and I enjoyed the vibe of it. It felt like a really odd fit with the rest of the show, though, and I’m not sure what tone the ending was trying to strike. Overall, 3.5/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖💀💀  (imagine I can emoji half a robot) Beyond the Aquila Rift, like Sonnie, is wholly competent and also pretty rote. The twist was telegraphed from a mile off, and imo the episode only manages to fill a full 15 minutes because like 3 of those minutes are just sex scenes without much substance. Again, photorealistic animation isn’t my bag, but even that considered the faces were carefully-textured enough that mid-tier animation made it all feel a bit Bioware and got in the way of me empathising with the characters. The story is an absolute off-the-rack sci-fi classic, and there’s no real twist on it - if I’d never seen this story played out before it might have worked, but I have seen approximately 20000000 versions of it and this just wasn’t bringing anything new. I liked the navigator character, when she was in it, and the design was competent, but it just did nothing for me because it all felt deeply generic and so the episode just dragged on with nothing new or exciting. 2.5/5 robots  🤖🤖💀💀💀 Good Hunting is another one where I liked bits of it but felt like it didn’t really go anywhere with its premise. I like the idea of contrasting traditional fantasy tropes with scifi, and I do like to see steampunk that legitimately grapples with the colonial baggage, but it just felt like it didn’t have much room to grow. The mechanical animation was really pretty - I especially liked the scene with the automatic hare - and the story was solidly paced, plus I do like when stories have a go at recontextualising traditional Seductress Monsters, buuuut to be honest it felt like a bit of a letdown. Where it hit, it hit solidly - I liked the throughline about how she felt like she’d become what he had thought her mother was, and the parallels between his experience of working for the British and her experience of sex work for them - but I think the issue for me is that, while I liked Liang and felt like he was well fleshed out, this felt like it should have been Yan’s story and it just wasn’t, really. Also I’m not very clear on what the point of the robotics work was - symbolically it works on some levels but I don’t know if it actually helps along the core theme, although the more time I spend with the idea the more it’s working for me. Still, I think we could have done with cutting the wuxia-ey scene at the beginning in half to make room for a little more meat at the end. 4/5 robots  🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Ugly Dave. It’s fine. Nothing to write home about. The gag is pretty clear from the off, and doesn’t really build up into anything other than the obvious, but the animation is nice, the character design is strong and the jokes are adolescent but well-delivered. 3/5 robots  🤖🤖🤖💀💀 Shape-Shifters. I don’t know how this one was because it bored and annoyed me so much that I skipped to the next episode after 5 minutes. Ugh. Yeah. They’re werewolves and their squad is mean to them even though they’re real good at war. I assume that the only reason this isn’t called Dog Soldiers is because there’s already a film called Dog Soldiers about werewolf squaddies which the target audience of this short film, edgy teenage boys with a hardon for modern military propaganda, already like (side note: I didn’t get to the bit where presumably they eventually transform. but I flicked through a few frames on the tracker bar and they looked like incredibly generic wolves). My guess is that probably at the end they a) save their squad despite being discriminated against or b) the more annoying one gets killed by his own side. probably both. idk, I noped out because it was just wanking off the concept of the modern military and our two protagonists were two obnoxiously macho army men talking about how unfair it was that nobody appreciated how GOOD THEY WERE AT KILLING FOR ‘MURICA mission accomplished etc. Oh, and the animation style was another incredibly uninteresting photo-realistic but video-game animated pile of boring. 0/5 robots, too bored to actually watch it  💀💀💀💀💀

However, luckily just as I was getting Very Bored of Shooty Shooty Bang Bang adolescence, there were a succession of really nice character pieces

Helping Hand was a great small-scope short story. A lot of the episodes are really bombastic but Helping Hand is small and contained and character-driven and I liked it quite a bit. The animation is once again photorealistic, but to be honest that works well for me here because the movements are really believable, there’s a good reason to use animation instead of live actors (because it’s a situation where you’d either need a really expensive shooting setup or to mostly animate it anyway), and I think that the personal struggle would have had a lot less impact if the animation was more stylised. It’s a bit gross but beautfiully paced and tense (and the character’s Irish accent isn’t ear-burningly awful this time!) I will also say that of all of them, this character design feels the least male-gazy and the most like an actual person.  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Fish Night was unexpectedly gorgeous! I really don’t rate the animation style of pseudo-cel 3d with heavy lineart, and I was all set to find this episode ugly, but it’s honestly stunning. It feels like some of the best Nobrow comics, I can almost smell litho ink and feel heavy paper. It’s just got such a beautiful artistic sensibility. Storywise it’s a little weak - the characters are solid and the wonder is real but it just doesn’t really go anywhere, and it just sort of ends, it could really have done with a few seconds of closing scene because it felt like it just cut itself off  - and I’m not sure it’s anything meatier than a beautiful piece of visual work, but it’s allowed to be that and it does it stunningly!  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Lucky 13 isn’t really up my alley (although Samira Wiley puts in a great performance and I love her) and it’s another one where I sort of think, you know, why is this an animated piece if you’re just going to mocap everyone and set most of the action in cockpits and in a hangar, but it rattles along well and does what it wants to do, which is to be a solid Hero Pilot And Ship story. I just don’t actually want to be watching military dramas, but at least it’s much, MUCH better executed than Shape-Shifters both in terms of animation and storytelling, the characters are likeable, and the pacing is good.  3/5 robots  🤖🤖🤖💀💀 Zima Blue. LOVE LOVE LOVE this story, brought down only by the fact that I, uh, kind of hate the art style? A lot? It’s a matter of personal taste but that angular, geometric, leggy thing does nothing for me, although the environments are really nice. But the actual story is clever, original and a little bit silly in all the ways I like my scifi to be, plus it explores some interesting themes of consciousness and happiness. And the twist in the tail is really nice and fairly unexpected.  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Blindspot is dull, dull, dull, desperately dull and generic. We’re back on the adolescent Shooty Boom Boom bullshit, with poorly established stakes that never really get resolved, uninteresting and unpleasant characters, and a completely textbook story. The female character is apparently only there to make brain-itchingly bad Sassy Oneliners and have one scene where she shoots some guys, all of the characters have taken their personalities from the 15 Year Old Boy’s Guide To Being A Cool Rude Badass, the character designs are cluttered and not amazing, and there’s nothing original or exciting happening, it’s just a series of different shaped guns. The ending at least has a strong idea of what it’s doing, and almost works, but it’s dragged down by the fact that it relies on me being sad that these characters have got stomped, and I’m afraid that’s a lot to ask with characters as annoying and unpleasant as these. 1/5 robots  🤖💀💀💀💀 Ice Age. It’s a fun little concept. I’m not sure it really goes anywhere much but it’s quirky and very nicely put together, and it gave me a chuckle.  3/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖💀💀 Alternate Histories feels like something I’d see on Newgrounds in 2004, but slightly polished up and expanded on. Ha ha ha Hitler gets killed in various ways, which was definitely hilarious when I was 12. It’s much more interested in coming up with funny ways Hitler might die than it is in exploring any alternate histories that might result, despite the framing device (and also weirdly seems to imply that Nazi victory would be a good thing in one scenario?). I’ve used the word adolescent a lot here but this one isn’t even really adolescent in its sensibilities, it feels aimed at 10-13 year olds. 2/5 robots  🤖 🤖💀💀💀 The Secret War closes out the series in a way that feels consistent with the overall sense I got from Love, Death and Robots, in that it’s solidly made and not particularly original. But I did like it - the animation is stunning (although I stand by imitation not being the point of animation, it is aiming for realism and it does that almost flawlessly) and it’s surprisingly emotionally engaging. It keeps its focus on the experiences of the soldiers as people rather than on the concept, which is for the best as the concept is pretty generic, and it produces something with a bit of genuine emotional weight and stakes. It’s basically the exact same base story as Suits, even down to a lot of elements of the monster design, but set in a very different place with very different core characters, and as both Suits and Secret War are really character pieces, they make two very different but very strong stories out of it. This one is really hammering the GRITTY button as hard as it can, but it pulls it off, and while it still felt very pointed at teenage boy sensibilities it was a genuinely engaging and immersive story. If Soul Sucker desperately wanted to be the Hellboy comics, Secret War solidly evokes the Hellboy films but certainly isn’t just trying to be something other than what it is.  4/5 robots 🤖🤖🤖🤖💀 Overall thoughts - like all anthology shows tend to be, Love, Death and Robots is very hit and miss. A lot of episodes are really, REALLY rooted in a teenage nerd boy idea of coolness, and it doesn’t have much interest in criticising or examining what that means, but when it manages to get away from that a lot of these short films are fantastic. I will say that like a lot else, it’s dominated by both white male writers and white male protagonists and/or Strong Female Characters, and again, the best episodes tended to be ones that broke that pattern. From the title and trailer, I was worried about it being a lot more sexualised and gratuitous than it ended up being (although it definitely had its ehhhhhh moments), and I was honestly pleasantly surprised that of 18 episodes, only 2 featured rape-revenge plotlines, and none (maybe one?) were about Evil Seductresses, because given the title I had Concerns. However, it is still overwhelmingly white character-wise, which is a shame - I counted 2 episodes with Asian protagonists and 2 more with Black protagonists, which is relatively good, but there were probably only about 10 named/centred characters of colour all told. I dunno. I’d recommend taking a punt on it but I have Criticisms of the show overall. The good episodes are REALLY good though and I will definitely be rewatching 2 or 3 of them.

[theclaravoyant]

AN ~ Happy @aosficnet2 Midyear Exchange @pizza-is-my-buziness​! It’s been a pleasure to finally write for you, my favourite Skimmons author! I’ve still got a couple of your ideas up my sleeve, but I couldn’t resist the opportunity for a little shameless fluff! I hope you like it <3 

Sometimes you see a pretty girl and pour lemonade all over her. Sometimes, she forgives you. First impressions are overrated, after all.

Rated G/K+. Skimmons/Bioquake. College AU, Meetcute, Fluff. Read on AO3 (~2500wd)

Primrose & Pink Lemonade

Daisy was quite happily lost in her own little world as she made a bee line up the cafeteria stairs to her usual sitting place. She had a lunch tray in one hand – bearing a cheeseburger, fries, and an egregiously sized pink lemonade, all well-balanced after months of practice – and her phone in the other, tapping away enthusiastically as she toyed with new ideas for the video game she was creating. Nothing like a boring-as-hell Art History class to get the juices flowing.

Her mind spun with the possibilities and she couldn’t bear to wait those precious few extra minutes for her computer to load. Why bother waiting, after all, when she knew what to get and where to go and just how she liked to set up? She didn’t even need to raise her eyes from her phone to duck around somebody who walked a little too close and brushed her arm, or to raise her tray and swerve aside when somebody spilled their drink on their own table and leapt after it with a cry of despair. No, Daisy was well accustomed to her routine, and to not having anyone else to do it with, and as such it barely even occurred to her that this entire two floors of cafeteria was a public space. It certainly did not occur to her that somebody else might be using the booth she had designated to herself, until she was half a second away from sliding into her seat and realised that somebody else was already there.

And not just any somebody else either. A girl. A beautiful girl, about Daisy’s own age by the look of her – so, a young woman really, not that Daisy was used to thinking of herself as such. Either way, she was apparently a massive nerd, with stacks of books and photocopied pages piled like a nest around her. She had music in her ears, humming along under her breath as she read and highlighted and took notes. As Daisy watched, the girl swept a lock of hair behind her ear, revealing hazel eyes and a whorl of freckles across her face. Her eyes lit up and she giggled to herself at something one of the theorists had written. From what Daisy could tell, these were biology textbooks, and so she found herself thinking how this woman must have a bizarre, adorable, terrible sense of humour, and then she found herself thinking, what a nerd, I love her, and very shortly after that, there was no more time to think. The magic of the moment erupted into chaos when Daisy’s distracted, slackened, love-struck hand upset the careful balance of her lunch tray, and sent her pink lemonade flying.

Daisy screeched, helplessly embarrassed and desperately trying to stop the rest of her tray from jumping ship in the opposite direction, and her phone from flying into the mess.

The girl screeched, jumping in her seat and scrambling to save as much as she could of her work from the sugary sweet, irreparably sticky assault.

Time, space, and every long-forgotten, mildly embarrassing moment in Daisy’s entire life flashed before her eyes, and then, even after the longest split-second she had experienced in some time, she still hadn’t worked through it far enough to remember that she should probably be helping. By the time her bodily awareness had returned to the present, the other woman had already shunted all her books away from the puddle of lemonade, had stripped off her sugar-spattered cardigan, and was forlornly dabbing at her shoulder-bag with her scarf, as lemonade dripped on down to the seat of the booth and over everything she owned.

“Oh, Jesus,” Daisy groaned. “I’m so sorry. Here. Take my napkins. Uh. I’ll go… get more napkins.”

After a moment of back and forth, she put her tray as daintily as possible down on the end of the table, right in the middle of the lemonade pool – it’s not like there was anywhere else she could put it, anyway, and what was she going to do? Take it with her? It was already full of lemonade anyway – and then she jogged over to the table full of condiments and cutlery, and grabbed napkin napkin napkin napkin… She kept guilt-pulling napkins until she started to wonder if she was stalling the return to the table, and then she decided that she was, and gritted her teeth, and slunk back to the beautiful woman she’d just made a complete ass of herself in front of and ruined forever.

She held the napkins out as an offer of peace, with an appropriately chagrinned expression.

“Oh, thank you,” said the other woman, removing her sopping scarf and sighing in defeat. “I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.”

“No, no, it’s my fault,” Daisy insisted. “You don’t have to think of anything. I just- I didn’t see you and I thought –“

You’re beautiful.

She cleared her throat instead. “The point is, I’m… uh… I’m really sorry. I’ll wash your scarf. Does it wash? I don’t know. And your jacket. And your bag, oh god-”

“Oh, no, it’s alright. It was an accident. And it’s just the outside, no drowned electronics or anything. All will be well, with a little elbow grease, I’m sure. Come sit down, please, mi booth es su booth.” The woman waved a distracted hand, inviting Daisy in, and then blushed and looked up at her. “Oh, dear, how rude. I’m Jemma, by the way. Jemma Simmons. I’m on exchange from England, busy recontextualising, so sorry about the mess. Pleasure.”

She held her hand out and, helpless, Daisy shook it. She was still far too mortified to pull off Hi Jemma by the way Jemma Simmons, I’m Daisy, with any degree of swagger, and she couldn’t think of anything else even remotely clever. She kind of just wanted to say You’re English because that voice – but of course, Jemma already knew that. So Daisy just laughed. A really, really uncomfortable laugh, so painful it made even her wince, so she quickly steered herself out of it and cleared her throat instead.

“Uh, Daisy,” she returned. “And I would love to take a seat but I don’t think there’s an inch left down there that’s not swimming in lemonade. I’m just gonna go. But uh, if you like, I could show you the other places I go around here? If you liked this spot, maybe you’ll like those. And I’ve run out of lemonade, so, you’re good there. I mean, assuming you don’t want to rip my throat out. Which would be fair.”

Jemma narrowed her eyes and tilted her head, studying Daisy as if to work out what angle she might be trying to come from. There was no doubt, theirs had been odd as far as introductions went, but Daisy’s bounce back was remarkable, and Jemma was rather determined to extricate herself from this sticky pink nightmare as soon as possible without making Daisy feel too bad about the whole thing. Convenient for both of them, then, that it seemed she had happily presented the perfect opportunity.

“I’ll tell you what,” Jemma proposed. “Forget the scarf and the bag and all of it. You can buy me a cup of tea on the way to these other wonderful places and we’ll forget the whole thing. Oh and – if you don’t mind, I’d appreciate some help with these books?”

“Sure.” Another uncomfortable laugh, but this one more breathless than scarred for life. Beaming ear to ear, Daisy felt suddenly aware of her heart thundering in her chest, and she gathered Jemma’s books toward herself as if she was picking armfuls of flowers. Carrying books for the pretty, quiet, nerdy girl. Wasn’t that the dream?

All but floating on air, Daisy led Jemma through the campus, past a coffee shop where she picked up a tea, coffee, and an everything bagel – a girl had to eat, after all – and on to an old brick amphitheatre. They talked the usual university fare; who they were, what they were studying, what they liked and did not like about various aspects of their courses. It seemed that much, at least, was international. By the time they reached Daisy’s second-favourite place to eat on campus, the lemonade incident was rapidly becoming a humourous memory.

“I don’t usually come here when it’s cold out,” Daisy explained. “It’s miles away from the computer labs and basically all my classes, and the wifi is crap, but I figured, you’re English, you can handle it.”

The amphitheatre was nothing special: a small installation for a class to practice projection, or perhaps for an intimate poetry reading. It was a concrete stage and red brick everywhere else. Fairly ordinary in and of itself. Yet Jemma found something wondrously unique about it. Perhaps it was simply the thrill of being let in on somebody’s secret, of being invited to belong, but there was a little piece of magic here that the cafeteria, and even the library where she usually felt at home, had lacked. Of course, there were also trees and sun above them, which Jemma had always loved.

“Oh, primrose!” she exclaimed, catching sight of some and running to admire it without a second thought. “This used to grow back at home, I do love them so. They’re marvelous flowers, you know.”

“What’s so special about them?” Daisy wondered. For a moment, Jemma scowled, feeling defensive of her favourite flowers. Then she realised that, though in somebody else’s mouth those words may have been dismissive, Daisy was watching her attentively, and when she did not answer immediately, began to approach as if to see them for herself. She knelt beside Jemma, and for a moment the words of explanation caught in Jemma’s throat. From the get-go it had been clear that Daisy was a fun person, a bit of a character, and judging by the rock band t-shirt and the jeans and boots and dozen or so political cause pins dotted over her computer bag, a rather passionate one too. But in their brief time together Jemma had noticed a streak of understated intelligence that she had to admire, and it shone through now as Daisy studied the flowers with a sense of inspiration about her.

“You really want to know?” Jemma wondered, hopeful.

“Yeah,” Daisy snorted, but was beaming back when she looked up. Her expression said that if she had not wanted to know, she would not have asked, and Jemma found herself feeling rather bashful all of a sudden.

“I- it’s just, well, I tend to ramble about these sorts of things. A lot of people lose interest fairly quickly. I wouldn’t blame you.”

“No, please, explain away.”

But alas, they had whiled away their seemingly endless time together. Jemma’s phone vibrated, again and again and again, and chimes began to ring out the alarm she had set. She pulled it out of her pocket, and checked it, and gaped in affronted surprise.

“Bloody hell!” she cried. “It’s three o’clock! I’ve got to get back to class!”

“Okay. Okay. Uh. Biology’s this way. Quick!”

They sprinted down the amphitheatre steps so fast that Daisy had to catch Jemma’s hand to stop her falling. They barely noticed the contact, frantic as they both were, and it was gone in a moment anyway as they scrambled to scoop up the books, climb the other side of the amphitheatre, and sprinted across campus with the wolves of poor time management at their heels. When they reached Jemma’s class, she paused a moment to catch her breath, adjust her hair and the lay of her bag and her shirt and all, and then she turned to Daisy.

“How do I look?” she asked.

“Perfect. Great. Good,” Daisy assured her, nodding emphatically. In truth her hair was a little windblown and there was a tiny smear of dirt on her knee where she’d knelt to look at the flowers, but just because Daisy had catalogued every inch of her, didn’t mean anyone else would. And didn’t mean it wasn’t good, great, perfect. “How- how are you feeling?”

“Nervous,” Jemma confessed. “Blimey, what a terrible first impression.”

Daisy huffed, and smirked at the irony as she helped Jemma arrange her copious books into a manageable pile in her arms.

“Personally,” she said, “I think first impressions are overrated.”

Jemma’s eyes sparkled as she smiled back. “Perhaps you’re right. Either way, I should go. No need to make things worse.”

She turned on her heel and spun, and the book that Daisy hadn’t finished passing back fell to the floor with a light thud. Daisy’s eyes followed it for a brief moment, and she yelped-

“Wait, you forgot-“

But when she looked up again, Jemma had already disappeared inside. Her heart beginning to fall, Daisy bent to pick up the book. It was thin, and it looked old, with a rough-textured, mint-green cover and a broken spine. On the front, there was an embossed illustration of a daisy and below it, the words: Flowers of the English Countryside. Daisy smiled down at it, and flicked through its pages. She had some time to kill after all; perhaps she could take a look before returning this to the library. She really was curious about primroses now, after all.

Not as curious, though, as she was about the slip of paper that fell out from between the covers and into her hand. It had been torn from a photocopy, by the looks of things, of a book called An Introduction to Conservation Politics in the United States. It had been, unmistakably, dipped in pink lemonade. And it had been scribbled on – no doubt, Daisy knew, by the hand of a woman running across campus like her life depended on it. This was Jemma’s number, and it was meant for her.

Daisy smiled. She smiled so widely that she had to bite her tongue to stop her grin consuming her entire face. She pumped a fist and let out a skittering jump of delight, before turning and walking back the way she had come with as much decorum as she could bother to muster. She had to play it cool, after all.

(But not so cool that she didn’t spent the rest of the afternoon wondering if that was a 4 or a 9, a 1 or a 7, or if it would be weird for her to just go back to Jemma’s classroom and meet her when they wrapped up for the day.

Surely not as weird as someone you’d just poured lemonade all over, giving you her phone number, right?)

[meeedeee]

Star Wars: The Last Jedi RSS FEED OF POST WRITTEN BY FOZMEADOWS

Warning: total spoilers for The Last Jedi.

After weeks of frantically speed-scrolling through my various social media feeds when anything that looked like a Star Wars spoiler appeared, I’ve finally managed to get out and see The Last Jedi. Despite my diligence, I didn’t go in completely unspoiled: I knew the general shape of the fan discourse surrounding the characterisation, which means I had some context cues and a smatter of details to work with, but not the major plot points. Now that I’ve seen the movie, however, I’m electing to write my own review before catching up on other people’s opinions, so if I touch on something that’s already been dissected at length without referencing said discussion, that’s why.

In broad-brush strokes, I enjoyed The Last Jedi. Assessing it purely on its own merits, there was a lot it did right: the cinematography, special effects and original creature creation were wonderful, I loved Rose Tico, and there was a pleasing balance of drama, emotion and humour, the requisite scenery-chewing deftly subverted by moments of self-aware comedy, especially in the opening exchange between Hux and Poe Dameron. Mostly, it was solid.

Mostly.

But.

The thing is, no Star Wars film is an island. The Last Jedi is the second film in a trilogy of trilogies, one whose core trio were clearly and intentionally mapped to the heroes of the (original by creation-date, second by internal chronology) series in The Force Awakens: Finn to Han, Rey to Luke and Poe to Leia. This being so, it was easy to mark the other narrative similarities between The Force Awakens and A New Hope – most notably, the parallels between the Death Star and Starkiller Base, both of which were destroyed in the respective finales, but not before their destructive power was unleashed. Which makes comparing The Last Jedi to The Empire Strikes Back not only reasonable, but – I would argue – necessary, if only to determine whether the decision to parallel the new with the old has continued beyond the first film.

The short answer to that is: yes, The Last Jedi is structurally akin to Empire, but not always to useful effect. The long answer, however, is rather more complex.

As a writer, there’s nothing that makes me crave a metaphorical red pen quite like a story where, for whatever reason, I can see the authorial handwave of Because Reasons gumming up the mechanics. If The Last Jedi was an original film, detached from the Star Wars universe, I’d be able to tell you that the problem stems from the poorly-forced sexist clash between Poe and Holdo, and that would be that. But because The Last Jedi has borrowed certain key narrative structures from Empire, there’s a clear template against which to measure its narrative choices, which makes it easier to infer the hows and whys of various changers.

A quick refresher in Star Wars, for those who haven’t watched the original trilogy lately. The Empire Strikes back begins with the Rebel forces being ousted from Hoth in a massive battle. After fleeing the planet, Luke goes to Degobah to train with Master Yoda, while Han and Leia spend some time dealing with a broken Millennium Falcon and the pursuit of Boba Fett, kissing and bickering and generally cementing their chemistry before finally going to track down Han’s old buddy, Lando Calrissian, in Cloud City. Frustrated with Yoda, Luke has a premonition of danger and goes to rescue his friends, as Lando, who’s been strong-armed by Darth Vader, hands Han and Leia over to the Empire. Han is frozen in carbonite after Leia declares her love for him, Luke loses a hand and learns Vader is his father, and the film ends with the pair them, plus Lando, escaping as they resolve to rescue Han.

By comparison, The Last Jedi follows a fairly similar arc. The film opens with the Rebellion being ousted from its base and pursued in a space battle. Rey attempts to persuade Luke to help her, while Poe and Finn are left dealing with a fleet that’s low on fuel as they try to outrun Hux and the First Order. As Leia lies injured, Poe clashes with Holdo over command, which results in him sending Finn and Rose on a secret mission to find a codebreaker who can help sabotage the First Order’s ship. Unable to the codebreaker, Rose and Finn return instead with DJ, a stranger who claims he can help them, but who ends up betraying them to the First Order. Unaware of this, Poe mounts a short-lived mutiny against Holdo. Meanwhile, frustrated with Luke and experiencing an odd connection to Kylo Ren, Rey goes to try and turn him to back to the light, only to find that Snoke was the source of their connection. Kylo kills Snoke and his guards with Rey’s help, reveals the truth about her lost parents, then betrays her in turn. In the final battle, Rose is injured and declares her feelings for Finn, and the film ends with the rebellion united but still fleeing.

Based on this, it seems clear that The Last Jedi is intended to parallel The Empire Strikes Back, both structurally and thematically. All the same elements are in play, albeit recontextualised by their place in a new story; but where Empire is a tight, sleek film, The Last Jedi is middle-heavy. The major difference between the two is Poe’s tension-and-mutiny arc, which doesn’t map to anything in Empire.

And this is the part where things get prickly. As stated, I really love Rose Tico, not only because she’s a brilliant, engaging character superbly acted by Kelly Marie Tran, but because she represents another crucial foray into diverse representation, both in Star Wars and on the big screen generally. There’s a lot to recommend Vice-Admiral Holdo, too, especially her touching final scene with Leia: I still want to know more about their relationship. I am not for a moment saying that either character – that either woman – doesn’t belong in the film, or in Star Wars, or that their roles were miscast or badly acted or anything like that. But there is, I suspect, a truly maddening reason why they were paired onscreen with Finn and Poe, and that this logic in turn adversely affected both the deeper plot implications and the film’s overall structure.

Given how closely The Last Jedi parallels the main arc of Empire, it’s narratively incongruous that, rather than Finn and Poe heading out to find the codebreaker together, the pair of them are instead split up, decreasing their screen-time while extending the length of the film. But as was firmly established in The Force Awakens, Finn and Poe map to Han and Leia – which is to say, to a canonical straight couple. Even without the phenomenal on-screen chemistry between John Boyega and Oscar Isaac, that parallel is clear in the writing; and in Empire, Han and Leia’s time alone is what catalyses their on-screen romance.

That being so, I find it impossible to believe that Finn and Poe were split up and paired with new female characters for anything other than a clumsy, godawful attempt to No Homo the narrative. Rose and Finn’s scenes are delightful, and their actors, too, have chemistry, but every time we cut back to Poe and Holdo, the story flounders. Everything that happens during Finn’s absence is demonstrably redundant: not only does it fail to move the plot forward, but in trying to justify the time-split, writer/director Rian Johnson has foisted a truly terrible mini-arc on Poe Dameron.

Specifically: after Leia is incapacitated, Holdo is given command of the rebellion. Seeing Holdo for the first time, Poe looks startled and states that she’s not what he was expecting. When Poe, recently demoted by Leia for ignoring orders, asks Holdo what her plan is, Holdo dismisses him as a hot-headed “flyboy” who isn’t what they need right now. Not only doesn’t she tell him where they’re headed, she apparently doesn’t tell anyone else, either. This failure to communicate her plan to her people is, firstly, why Finn feels he has to light out on his own, which is how he meets Rose, and is secondly why, once Finn and Rose come up with a plan to infiltrate the First Order, Poe decides that they can’t risk involving Holdo.

As we eventually learn, Holdo does have a plan – and a good one. There is literally no reason why, given the steadily escalating fear and anxiety of her crew, who are watching their companion ships get picked off one by one, she doesn’t share the full details with the rebellion. Instead, she leaves it to Poe to figure out that she’s refuelling the transport ships to evacuate – and when he panics, pointing out (correctly) that the transports are neither shielded nor armed, she likewise doesn’t elaborate on the fact that they’ll have a cloaking device to shield them and a destination close by, one where they can land and take shelter while the main ship acts as a decoy.

Because of Holdo’s decision to withhold this information, Poe thinks that she’s given up and is leading them blithely to their deaths, and so stages a mutiny – one in which he’s supported by a number of other, equally worried crewmembers. Happily, Leia recovers from her injuries in time to reclaim control, and only then does she let Poe in on Holdo’s plan. Poe suffers no further consequences for his actions, and even when they talk privately, both Holdo and Leia seem more amused by his mutiny than angry at what he’s done, rendering the whole arc moot. Except, of course, for the fact that Finn and Rose, on their mission from Poe, bring DJ into the mix – and DJ, who knows about the cloaking device, betrays this secret to the First Order, who promptly open fire on the transport ships.

Hundreds of rebellion soldiers die because Poe and Holdo so disliked each other on sight that neither one trusted the other with vital information – and for the rest of the film, this is never addressed. But of course, Johnson can’t address it, not even to hang a fucking lampshade on it, because the entire scenario is manufactured as a way to justify Poe’s protagonist-level screentime while Finn is away – which is also why, contextually, their antagonism doesn’t even make sense. The film begins with the premise that the entire rebellion, who’ve just been flushed out of their single remaining base, is on the run together – so why the fuck haven’t Poe and Holdo met before now? Especially as both are shown to have a close, personal relationship with Leia, it rings utterly false that they’d not only be in the dark about one another, but start out instantly on the wrong foot.

As such, the coding around Poe’s surprise at Holdo – that she’s not what he expected – is a lazy misstep. Traditionally, when hotshot male characters say this about a new female commander, it’s a sexist dogwhistle: oh, I didn’t know we’d be getting a woman. But why would Poe Dameron, son of Shara Bey and devotee of General Leia Organa, be surprised by Holdo’s gender? He wouldn’t, is the answer. Flatly, canonically, he wouldn’t. But if there’s some other aspect of Holdo that’s meant to ping as unusual besides her being female, it’s not obvious. It would’ve made far more sense to write the two as having a pre-existing antagonistic relationship for whatever reason: instead, we get Poe cast as an impatient, know-it-all James Bond to Holdo as Judi Dench’s M, who doesn’t have time for his nonsense when they first meet, but who ends up forgiving it anyway.

It’s like Rian Johnson looked at the Poe Dameron of The Force Awakens – a character universally beloved for being vulnerable, funny, charming, honest, loyal and openly affectionate – and decided, Hey, that guy’s an awesome pilot, which means he’s a COOL GUY, and COOL GUYS don’t play by the RULES, man, especially if it means listening to WOMEN – they just A-Team that shit in secret and to HELL with the bodycount! And anyway he’s HOT, so he’s ALWAYS forgiven.

Dear Rian Johnson, if you’re reading this: I like a lot of what you did with this film, but FUCK YOU FOREVER for making Poe Dameron the kind of guy who gets a bunch of his friends killed, then has a mutiny, then indirectly gets even MORE people killed, and never shows any grief about or cognisance of his actions, all because you wanted to avoid fuelling a homoerotic parallel that you openly queerbaited in promo but never intended to fulfil anyway. GIVE US OUR GODDAMN GAYS IN SPACE, YOU COWARD.

Anyway. 

The point being, the entire plot of The Last Jedi suffers because of a single, seemingly homophobic decision – unnecessarily splitting up Poe and Finn to avoid further Han/Leia comparisons – and the knock-on consequences thereof. Which is where I bring out my metaphorical Red Pen of Plot-Fixing and say, here is what should’ve happened. Namely: Poe and Holdo should’ve had a pre-existing antagonistic relationship, but one that didn’t prevent them from sharing information like grown-ups. Rather than Rose being part of the rebellion, she should’ve been the codebreaker they were sent to retrieve on Holdo’s orders (because two plans are better than one, and why not try both gambits?). This voids the need for DJ, who barely appears before disappearing again, so that Rose-as-codebreaker retains her status as an important, well-fleshed character who interacts with both Finn and Poe, and whose introduction works to map her onto Lando Calrissian. If you really must keep DJ because Benicio del Toro and thematic betrayal parallels (more of which shortly), he can be the dubious guy with First Order secrets that Rose has been trying to recruit for the rebellion, which explains why she’s with him on the casino planet in the first place, and how he’s so easily able to cut a deal with Phasma. BOOM! You’ve just saved a solid 20 minutes of redundant screen-time without degrading Poe’s character or undermining Holdo’s for no good reason and without dumb sexism creeping in. You’re welcome. 

(Also. ALSO. Not to take away from how lovely that Finn/Rose kiss was, but let’s just take a moment to peek into the other timeline, the one where Stormpilot gets to go canon the same way Han and Leia did in Empire. Let’s imagine Finn and Poe bickering in the casino, getting all rumpled during the escape while Rose and BB8 exchange Meaningful Looks and scathing droid-beeps about the two of them. Let’s imagine, during that final battle on Krait, that it’s Poe, not Rose, who stays behind to forcibly knock Finn out of that self-sacrificing dive towards the enemy gun; Poe who grabs Finn and kisses him because they should fight for what they love, not against what they hate, before passing out injured, thus completing the parallel of Han going into carbonite after kissing Leia. Let us gaze upon that world, that glorious thematic act of completion, subversion and queer recontextualisation, and then quietly wish a pox on everything in our cruddy Darkest Timeline that conspired to make it unhappen.)

And now, with all that out of the way, let’s address the Rey/Kylo issue.

As I said at the outset of this piece, I tried my best to avoid spoilers before watching the film, but no matter how quickly I scrolled through feeds or closed my tabs, I still knew that a lot of people had come away rejoicing in the idea that Rey and Kylo were being set up romantically, while an equal number had not.

And I just. Look. While I’m not going to stand here and tell people what to ship or on what basis, both generally and at this historical moment in particular, I find myself with an intense personal dislike of narratives, canonical or otherwise, which take it upon themselves to woobify Nazis, neo-Nazis, or the clearly signposted fictional counterparts thereof, into which category Kylo Ren and the whole First Order falls squarely. I don’t care about how sad he feels that he killed his dad: he still fucking killed his dad, and that’s before you account for the fact that he demonstrably doesn’t give a shit about committing genocide. In the immortal words of Brooklyn Nine Nine’s Jake Peralta: cool motive, still murder. Except for how the motive isn’t actually cool at all, because, you know, actual literal genocide.

From my viewing of the film, I honestly can’t tell if Rian Johnson wants us to think of Kylo as a genuinely sympathetic, redeemable figure, or if he’s just trying to improve on the jarring, horrible botch the prequels made of Anakin’s trip to the Dark Side by showing us his complexity without negating his monstrousness. Or, well: let me rephrase that. In terms of the actual script and what takes place, I’d argue that, even if Kylo is given a final shot at redemption in Episode IX, he’s still not being primed as Rey’s love interest. It’s just that the question of how much Johnson wants us to care about Kylo as a person, regardless of anything that happens with Rey, is a different question, for all that the two are easily conflated.

Yes, Rey and Kylo touched hands. They did! And Kylo killed Snoke instead of Rey! This is what we might call a low fucking bar for romantic compatibility, but hey: it’s not like white dudes in cinema are ever really called upon to jump anything higher. More salient in terms of the Star Wars universe is the fact that, after they defeat Snoke’s guards, Kylo’s appeal to Rey to join him and rule the galaxy together is an almost word-for-word callback to the offer Anakin makes Padme in Revenge of the Sith, right before he force-chokes her into unconsciousness, leaves her pregnant ass for dead and turns into Darth Vader. The fact that Anakin and Padme are also sold as a tragic romance prior to this moment is not, I would contend, the salient hook on which to hang the hopes of canon Reylo. Aside from anything else, Rey is mapped to Luke and Kylo, very clearly, to Darth Vader: with clear precedent, Rey’s desire to turn Kylo back from the Dark Side can be heartfelt without being romantic.

(Also, I mean. The connection that Rey and Kylo had was deliberately forged by Snoke to exploit their weaknesses, which is why they each had a vision of converting the other. Though we’re given a hint that the link remains in the final scenes, it ends with Rey shutting the door – both literally and figuratively – in Kylo’s face. I’m hard-pressed to view that as destiny.)

As for Kylo himself, his characterisation reads to me as deliberate, selfish nihilism. Kylo is conflicted over his murder of Han Solo because it impacts him, but at no point does he hesitate to reign down destruction and death on strangers. His desire to turn Rey to the Dark Side is likewise covetous, possessive: she is powerful, and he wants a powerful companion in the Force, but one who, by virtue of being his apprentice, will be subordinate to him – not a judgemental superior, as Snoke was. This is reflected in the way DJ’s betrayal of Rose and Finn is paralleled with Kylo’s decision to first help Rey when it benefits him, and then to turn on her afterwards. Like DJ, Kylo is mercenary in his allegiances, helping whoever helps him in the moment, then discarding them when the relationship is no longer useful.

The death of Snoke itself, however, is rather anticlimactic. He was a looming, distant figure in The Force Awakens, and while there’s an established tradition of Star Wars villains showing up and looking cool without their origins ever being satisfactorily explained at the time, this is vastly more annoying in Snoke’s case. Unlike General Greivous, Darth Maul or Boba Fett, Snoke isn’t just the random antagonist of a single film, plucked from obscurity to thwart the heroes: he’s the reason Ben Solo turned to the Dark Side and become Kylo Ren. Presumably, the hows and whys of Snoke manipulating the young Ben could still come out in Episode IX, but if it never gets addressed onscreen, I’m going to be deeply irritated.

On a more positive note, I enjoyed what the film did with Luke’s arc, for all that it’s not what I’d expected. To me, one of the most fascinating arguments in Star Wars discourse is the question of the Jedi, their morality, and how it all set Anakin up for failure. The Jedi ideology put forth in the prequels is the kind of thing that sounds superficially deep and meaningful, but which looks increasingly toxic the more closely it’s examined. The ban on children, marriage and close relationships outside the Order; the extreme youth of those taken for training combined with a forcible, protracted separation from their families; the idea that fear necessarily leads to anger, and so on. Luke describing the Force to Rey as something that existed beyond the Jedi, an innate aspect of the world, felt both refreshing and intuitively right, even given the necessity of respecting the balance between light and dark. The appearance of force-ghost Yoda felt a little pat, as did his ability to call lightning, but he still had one of my favourite lines in the whole film, delivered in support of Luke’s choice to step away from the Jedi teachings: as masters, we become the thing they surpass.

There were other, smaller niggles throughout than my issues with Poe and the no-homo restructuring of the plot: the handwaving of distances between Luke’s world and the main fight in a story that hinged on fuel supply; the sudden appearance of trenches and tunnels into the caves on Krait when everyone was meant to be trapped inside; the random appearance of an Evil Ball Droid to play momentary nemesis to BB8; the on-the-nose decision to show a random white slave boy, holding a broom he Force-summoned like a lightsaber, at the very end of the film. And as wonderful as it was to see Billie Lourd on screen, the knowledge that Carrie Fisher will be absent from Episode IX – the film that was meant to have been her movie, just as Harrison Ford had the The Force Awakens and Mark Hamill had The Last Jedi – rendered both her presence and her mother’s all the more bittersweet.

  Ultimately, The Last Jedi is a successful-but-frustrating mess, which is kind of how you know it’s a Star Wars movie. I’ll be forever angry at the carelessness with which Rian Johnson treated Poe Dameron and Vice-Admiral Holdo, but even if I could’ve wished for a different plot structure, I’m always going to stan hard for Rose Tico, who was warm and kind and intelligent and who stole every scene she was in. LESS REN, MORE ROSE – that’s my new motto.

Here’s hoping that Episode IX delivers.

  from shattersnipe: malcontent & rainbows http://ift.tt/2CThaaG via IFTTT

[agrandquiet]

Seems like Chris Nolan been listening to his critics. They say he struggles to build compelling and emotionally nuanced characters, he goes and creates a film without any. They say that his plots are tightly wound but don’t hold up under scrutiny, Dunkirk is virtually plotless. They say he mixes dialogue waaaaaaaaay too fucking low in the edit and he makes a whole film where his approach actually make sense. If it weren’t for the fact that this a full on onslaught of an action film it’d probably be unrecognisable.

It all works out for the better though, the film great, it’s a tight 100 minutes of propulsive force, kicking its players up, down and around the British Channel. Even in that time it still manages to feel like an epic, it’s bruising. The film makes up for all the ruthless cuts it makes to the current popular style of narrative cinema by just replacing them with other things it’s perfect misdirection.

First, instead of characters it has actors. I know that sound like a reductive thing to say, but when three of the most crucial and important leads are ‘man in plane’, ‘man on boat’ and ‘man on pier’ you damn well best get them played by Tom Hardy, Mark Rylance and Ken Branagh. Hardy’s work is the most immediately impressive, the man is given nothing, he dogfights and checks the fuel levels in the tank, most of the time he’s got an oxygen mask over half of his face and aviator goggles over the other. And still, and still he’s this perfect, courageous superman, king of the skies and our hearts.

Now the film wisely avoids clear deliberate structure to the events unfolding, I mean, it’s a mass evacuation the troops on the beach are being actively slaughtered by the overhead planes, the only safe place for ships to make land is in range of the enemy artillery, everything about this sucks and is bad. So for our heroes on the beach, nothing can make sense. If it does then it’s gonna end up being completely at odds with the experience it’s trying to recreate. In the absence of this traditional structure then, Nolan adapts the structure of time.

The film is told as three parallel stories: one following men on the land, one on the sea and one in the air. Titles at the open tell us the first story is happening over a couple of days; the second over the course of a single day; and the third only an hour. This then allows the film to play us the same events, altering our perspective, teasing us with the information it provides that we may glimpse into the future or recontextualise the events of the past.

Not that it helps any, with Dunkirk Nolan seems content for the first time to observe. As a filmmaker he’s always wanted his films to probe, to investigate, to understand. It’s a good impulse, but one that has the tendency to lead him astray, his film’s mysteries being ones that aren’t that compelling when exposed to the light of day. Here he challenges his audience with incomprehension, throughout you’re never going to see an Axis soldier, you’re never going to leave the incredibly limited perspectives of the leads. There’s no planning or strategy or rest, there’s only the moment, and how to exist within it.

Think now on the casting of the three young troops who we follow, the very capable and engaging Fionn Whitehead, Harry Styles and Aneurin Barnard. Three interchangeable, identically-dressed, floppy-haired white boys (y’all make up your own mind there), it would have been so easy to get one of them to dye it. But that’s not the point, the film wants these guys to be one, it allows it to expand and contract, their horror being both personal and global. They represent every scared troop on that beach, but when it needs to they are able to represent only themselves, when pictured in single they can be a dogged lone survivor, together they are the power of fraternity.

It might feel tiresome, following around a walking construct of ideas but the script and the actors know how much to give, think about Tommy, Fionn Whitehead’s character interrupted at the beginning of the film as he about to take a shit, then hounded continually. It’s vulnerable enough, and human for you to get this character from the start.

Maybe in another world it would be weaker, if the action, if the bombast and announcement of itself don’t ring so true. It’s Nolan. I’m sure he used a lot of real boats. The credits listed the pilots of the actual authentic Spitfires that we see flying about. He probably flooded people and blew things up and did it all very visceral and very real and it’s all very nice. But the way Hoyte van Hoytema shoots them. The way Lee Smith edits. The way that all the sound folks make it sounds is nothing short of perfect.

Like it’s so good, and my screen weren’t particularly big, certainly wasn’t anywhere near what you’d be getting with that fancy IMAX but the quality and purpose of what it throws up there is something else. Swinging from something terrifying and real, to moments poetic expressionistic, and then pure boys own fantasy heroism. There something about how these things composed quick step from sloppy to beautiful that it feel for the first time that Nolan actually paying attention to the meaning contained in the images he creating.

Dunkirk was a lot of things, a massive tragedy, a massive success, this moment of heroism and hopelessness. Maybe that’s why Nolan don’t do characters so well, because he’s engaged on this level that so grand and sweeping his version of trauma is one that must extend to cover a battlefield, that why it go all wonky when it’s forced down into a single person. Dude maybe just feels it all and by discarding the personal he’s finally found a canvas big enough to paint it all on.

Dunkirk is currently screening in UK cinemas