maydaymemer

[maydaymemer]

which one is just the game

[maydaymemer]

“I understand workers” - is unemployed

Many such cases!

For an unemployed person, I sure am busy all the time!

[maydaymemer]

When you’re mean to me, this is who you’re being mean to btw:

[maydaymemer]

This is an evergreen post because just had to check back in on it because Gen X mario fans are STILL mad that the black edgelord sonic with a gun gets a more accurate adaption than mario has

I didnt really get into the Sonic movie as a 20 year old guy who likes the old games, good for kids but not my thing, but what I love about that movie’s existence is how it makes 40 to 50 year old Mario fans who got bullied at school irrationally mad that it’s doing better as a franchise than the Mario movie

[maydaymemer]

Hitman WOA: Ambrose on Trial - The Case for and Against

Back in 2022 IO released their final sandbox level for the Hitman trilogy: Ambrose Island. This level took place between the events of vanilla Hitman 2’s penultimate and final locations, but due to being released during Hitman 3’s lifecycle it was never treated as such. Instead Ambrose sat in an obscure spot of a specific menu, placed after Hitman 3’s locations but never having a mechanism during either campaign to go to it naturally. Until recently when a patch brought Ambrose to its chronological placement: now players upon beating Whittleton Creek’s Another Life will be prompted to play Ambrose’s main mission before moving onto the rest of Hitman 2

But was that a good decision? Even before this happened I was planning this post with the premise of if a new player should try to incorporate Ambrose into their first playthrough, but now it’s reality I want to examine if that made sense as a decision. In this little essay I will example the case FOR and AGAINST chronological Ambrose:

FOR #1 Convenience of Discovery

The first argument for placing Ambrose into chronological order is that every map of the trilogy is part of the main campaign, and keeping this consistent will ensure not only can old players who want to play Ambrose cant get there as convenient as possible but new players will know Ambrose exists without having to be told about it by the internet. Someone binging the trilogy now has a quick throughline to know what to play next, what has been played and what can be played

Even if Hitman 2’s cutscenes now change from motion comic style to cheap full motion back to motion comic and then to slightly less cheap full motion it’s at least consistently inconsistent. It was already precedent with Hitman 2’s DLC to have each level follow another in chronological order. You dont go from Sgail to Dubai; you go from Sgail to New York to Haven to Dubai. IO released this trilogy episodically so even retroactive releases earlier in the timeline should be accounted for

It also may be confusing for new players to play Romania and then see storyline targets they don’t recognize, granted they may still do that with New York and Haven but hey that’s IO’s fault for not having a convenient bundle of all the DLC

FOR #2 Fanservice, Plot, Development

It just makes sense to play Ambrose in its chronological place because the map’s identity as a pretend-lost chapter in H2 is so engrained into the design and premise of the map that anyone currently playing Hitman 2 will appreciate the details more having just played everything in a big glut. The map mixes set-pieces and characters from Hawke’s Bay, Colombia and Mumbai to give you the sense that this happened soon after those, so just outright playing it in that order will enhance what they were going for

It also helps to know what’s going on in the plot if the events are fresh in your mind. Taking out Grey’s militia is a big part of H2 but putting too much space between that and your playthrough of Ambrose might make you forget some details

With the foreknowledge of Hitman 3, IO went into Ambrose trying to patch up mistakes in the trilogy’s writing, and to clarify some plot points that were previously obscure details

For example, a conversation in Isle of Sgail that The Constant has on his phone directly references that Grey disbanded the Militia after the killing of Janus in Whittleton Creek. This detail is never mentioned again and if you dont ever hear this again the idea of “what happened to the militia?” might come off as a plot hole. Even though it isn’t a plot hole, closing an entire narrative thread in one phone call is still a bit strange

So Ambrose already fixes this, but the major problems come in Hitman 2’s DLC which inadvertently created a shadiness in Grey’s character that H3 had to correct. With the context of Ambrose people will be less inclined to get a false impression of Grey’s motives

The introductory briefing then provides minor foreshadowing of Diana’s character arc in H3, which isn’t much but it’s nice to make the trilogy seem more cohesive story-wise by including that

FOR #3 A Better Penultimate Level

I would argue that if you look at Ambrose and Sgail as two sides of the same coin, there’s some interesting thematic mirroring between the dingy, dark island of the Militia and the dark but opulent island belonging to an asset of Providence. I think its important to have that juxtaposition especially since this is the last major map of the trilogy where we tackle these sorts of themes, at least until Berlin

I also think that if you were to consider Whittleton as the penultimate level of Hitman 2, it’s a little easy. To go from a relaxing level like that to the last level in the game and one of the most intense it’s a little too abrupt. This stopgap also helps to buildup the location in-story as an important and secure area, which adds to the mystique and imposing nature when you get there

AGAINST #1 Pacing and The Themes of H2

My main issue with Ambrose’s placement is how it retroactively fucks up the one constant of Hitman 2’s design philosophy and that’s the contrast between levels

In the lead up to marketing and BTS of the trilogy each entry’s main philosophy is always touted as follows: Hitman 1’s theming is clean professionalism with each level showing 47 at the height of his career, Hitman 2’s theme is the criminal and colorful with each level visually and conceptually being the complete opposite of the last and Hitman 3’s theme was of the emotional journey, it starts out light, gets darker before ending on a more hopeful note

Unlike Hitman 1 and 3 which are more homogenous for the sake of the tone they’re going for Hitman 2 aims for this contrast and keeps it even into the DLCs: the quiet and stormy Hawke’s Bay is followed by the bright and bombastic Miami, then by the quiet and naturalistic Colombia followed by the bustling metropolis of Mumbai, then the serene Suburbia ended off with the dark and ominous Isle of Sgail which is then contrasted with the very small and modern Bank which is then contrasted by a tropical paradise in Haven

Ambrose fits the criminal and colorful (which doesnt need to mean literal color, because H2 has a ton of dingy and monochrome areas, moreso it refers to the colorful personalities of career criminals). It even adheres to Hitman 2’s more blue collar theming, contrasted with New Money in H1 and Old Money in H3. The problem is its aesthetic of the night time storm is already similar to Sgail, which is the very next map chronologically. The progression from Whittleton to Sgail was always intended to wow the audience, and I feel this plus H2 vanilla’s amazing pacing will now be lost on new players because H2 now has three levels made post-launch that are tacked onto its campaign

AGAINST #2 Difficulty Spike

The problem with Ambrose being considered now as part of H2 is it isn’t a H2 location in terms of its design philosophy. It makes use of mechanics like crafting, shortcuts and the camera which aren’t properly tutorialized until H3 and even Freelancer

I actually have any conclusion I drew from admittedly anecdotal evidence and it’s nowhere near conclusive but the fact Ambrose Island doesnt have guidance for its mission stories kind of assumes you have enough experience playing Hitman to know what you’re doing. When Berlin did this it was a calculated decision and the amount of signposting was carefully crafted to give a sense of freedom without being aimless. Ambrose isn’t nearly as well designed to accommodate the inexperienced player

So when I see streams of new players going through Ambrose I see them getting lost and finding the map impenetrable. This is with half the maps under there belt, but it seems Ambrose is maybe too much of an enthusiast’s map to be sprung on a player in the middle of a more guided experience like the other H2 maps

AGAINST #3 Repetition

This is more of a misc. category but there’s problems with Ambrose’s placement in a visual and gameplay sense. Just to rapid fire those complaints:

- The fact it reuses so many assets from Colombia and Mumbai so soon after playing those maps will make the map seem odd

- The fact there’s three island maps almost in a row from Ambrose to Sgail to Haven will potentially fatigue the play on that structure of level design

- Its briefing menu clearly uses the H3 style, but also the fact the pre-Sgail cutscene is meant to follow on from Janus death gives a slight anachronistic order to the whole affair

The Verdict

Now that Ambrose is forever part of H2’s gameplay experience, I think it’s up to the individual player to decide whether it works as part of the campaign or if they think it comes off as padding. Ive given reasons for and against, and I hope next time you play Ambrose or try it for the first time in its new Chronological order if it was truly better that way or not

And that may seem like a cop out, but that’s just because it is

[maydaymemer]

Is this satire?

The thing is that Walter White doesn't have any tragic flaws that aren't seen as virtues under white masculinity as constructed by American capitalist individualism. Like, you can make fun of the dudes who idolize him for missing the critical subtext, but they're attuned to the text itself at a very deep level.

[maydaymemer]

TimeSplitters 2 Concept Artworks

[maydaymemer]

i was having an unusually emotional day and allan wasn’t used to seeing me like that

[maydaymemer]

Make sure to listen to your body's needs and eat up this Moss Monday!

[maydaymemer]

Nick mullen is my comfort character

[maydaymemer]

Subbing to #SmilingFriends be like: here’s some gay porn

[maydaymemer]

Koppaites have no maidens, no spotify premium and no jordans

PIKMIN LORE CLARIFICATION: Hocotatians are NOT vegetarians, the Koppaites are just racist ignorant

I see "Hocotatians are vegetarians!" getting thrown around a lot as evidence of Louie's freakitude, and while Louie is certainly a freak, his omnivorous diet is NOT one of the reasons why. There are multiple references to meat being both appealing and consumed with some frequency by Hocotatian characters other than Louie, and I have good reason to believe that this widespread misconception about their diet is due to the Koppaites being ignorant and stereotyping Hocotate due to their massive export of PikPik Carrots.

(evidence below the cut)

This misconception stems from these lines in Pikmin 3, where the Koppaites (primarily Brittany) state this:

Note her European dialogue describing them as "utterly revolting".

Brittany repeatedly states that "They're vegetarians!", with the other two members of the Koppai crew assuming the same due to their knowledge of Hocotate extending to "carrot exporters" and "strange place". Given that Koppaites are obligate frugivores, they find the consumption of vegetables "revolting" and view it with disdain. Now, while I am certainly biased against Koppai and its inhabitants, I personally also wouldn't put it past them (especially Brittany being judgmental as she is) to throw out totally ignorant claims about other species' diets. Think of it like an "Americans eat Hamburger every day" at best and "people in rural areas only eat roadkill and pepsi" at worst sort of generalization.

Even ignoring Louie's claims that "dessert meat is all the rage on Hocotate" and that people will be clamoring over the Segmented Crawbster specifically, Captain Olimar (a reliable source imo) in Pikmin 2 EXPLICITLY STATES that meat is consumed on Hocotate multiple times. Here are some examples:

(Meat Satchel)

(Meat of Champions)

And just to prove that this isn't something retconned out by Pikmin 4, here is a Treasure log from Olimar describing how he sees the King of Meats:

He thinks it's delicious! He eats it! So yeah. The normal middle-aged Hocotatian guy eats meat. Now, this doesn't mean that it has to be common--it could very well be a delicacy (as is implied by some Louie dialogue) or more rare food in their diets, but it IS proven to be consumed by them all the same. They also have seafood, as Olimar describes the Fish Bed Snack in 4 as such and wants to cut down the Maestro of Flavor (which he acknowledges as FISH) to eat.

So yeah. In conclusion, meat is consumed in wider Hocotatian society. The Koppaites are now making potentially negative generalizations about other planets on top of being literal human locusts (seriously--they are implied to be a colonizer race that usually hops from planet to planet draining them of their resources, and the only reason they're the victims in 3 is because they already dried up the nearby planets with edible matter. They have NO sustainability. NO agriculture fucking SOMEHOW (it has to be willful ignorance, as other planets grow cash crops and obviously know how to farm). NO family planning, and NO planning in general. They get NO respect from me.)

[maydaymemer]

Shout out to @sinnabar

I'm in utterly complete distraught

[maydaymemer]

Someone should do Origins Polokus mixed with R2 Polokus. Like putting the hat on him or giving him a Shaved beard or both

various Polokus designs cause I love shapeshifters and I needed to draw something comforting (this qualify as comforting)

[maydaymemer]

various Polokus designs cause I love shapeshifters and I needed to draw something comforting (this qualify as comforting)

[maydaymemer]

various Polokus designs cause I love shapeshifters and I needed to draw something comforting (this qualify as comforting)

[maydaymemer]

Do one with TBOGT pls

I wanted to redraw the meme too

+ canon ver. and Kazuki Kasen ver. because he is officially (closet) gay, who married Toshiko for the sake of the Yakuza title, but fandom not talking about it.