#and i cant decide if that was weird? i didnt want to just copy his compliment and call him cute back? and he is both cute and handsome

[hernymills]

.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

nhw tide powerset, copy-pasted from discord (feeling too lazy to fix any mistakes rn <3)

tide was Literally Created To Be A Hero. thats . really all he is for a while. which means he is VERY GOOD AT WHAT HE DOES. GOD. cannot state enough just how much i think the elementals should be like. forces of nature (ha) but like. especially tide and magma. you see them in a fight and the instinct driven lizard monkey brain goes "oh fuck oh shit im in danger time to go into fight or flight mode"

that being said i dont think they really .. synergize with anyone outside of each other. there are different reasons for each of them but i think like… the reason the elementals were so successful in their time is because they work REALLY FUCKING WELL together (because theyre all clones of one guy so technically theyre the same person but theyre NOT but you get what i mean). they are all equals with each other but not necessarily with other people. so i think.. when the elementals were all together i think they almost always worked as a team and not much with anyone else, but after they broke apart… i think tide and magma stay pretty solo for their respective endbringers. they might team up with each other occasionally or when theyre against simurgh (im thinkin they can do really fun things with steam clouds) but other than that theyre kind of on their own. well. magma i think works with seismic a lot when he shows up. but he doesnt always show up. remind me after this to expand on the current elementals dynamic bc god i think about them a lot.

all this to say i think tide works solo most of the time and he has his reasons for it but i think that makes it even more impactful when he eventually starts teaming up w mark in fights (ooough tidalwave forever)

ros helped me out w the classification we've i think decided on shaker/mover for him . also like. thinker 1 wetsuit powers which is mostly a joke but also i kind of want it to be serious bcause it would be funny for ME . also im really bad at the number system so im not assigning him numbers. hes sooo powerful though. not enough that he can take on an endbringer ALONE bc that would be insane. but enough that he can fight leviathan for like. 10-20 unbroken minutes and not get immediately killed

ok ok specific powers here we go:

Hydrokinesis: pretty. obvious i guess. mans can control water. i thiiiink for now this is gonna be limited to liquid water and not ice. maybe in conjunction with someone elses power they could freeze his water but i dont think hed be able to control it much after that i think it would just keep whatever momentum it had before. also i think he is limited to liquids that are almost entirely water? as much as i love the potential of bloodbender tide i dont see a way to like. write him actually using that without it being sooooo so so awful and not in a fun way. but with things that r like… mixtures? solutions? whatever? as long as theyre mostly water i think he can partially control them. not as strong as water but he can. control the water In Them but but the Substance. does that mean anything? im thinking abt the part in burn your bridges where he uses whatever liquid was in the tubes to slow their falls. but he didnt like. use it to carry them to a stretcher or anything he just made sure they didnt faceplant onto the concrete.

Breathing underwater: also self explanatory. mans got gills. i like the idea of each of the clones having veryyyyy minor physical alterations. tides got gills and little fins. magmas got weird colored eyes and stone (lava rock) skin in a few places.

enhanced movement in water: i think this is partially because he can control water, he can use it to propel himself in whatever direction. create currents if hes fully underwater and stuff. i think he can make it through leviathans storm pretty easily. well,,, not easily because he cant really do anything about wind. but the rain/waves dont affect him as bad as they would other capes . also he can do the cool thing he can do in canon where he like. surfs on a wave. i rlly like that visual.

I FEEL LIKE I AM. FOGETTING SOMTHING HERE. SO IF U HAVE LIIIIKE SPECIFIC INTERACTION OR IMAGERY QUESTIONS I PROBABLY GOTCHU BUT HERES WHAT IVE GOT OFF THE DOME RN

also a bonus potential leviathan battle scene <3:

I think the wards' first endbringer fight Should Be leviathan and I don't think they were supposed to go but they did anyway and virion tried to copy tides power and he had a fucking. dad panic moment about it. full on dead stop in the middle of the fight you boys SHOULDNT BE HERE go home. but eventually imprint copies his power anyway and Tide realizes like. OK. he won't be in as much danger if he can do the same things as me. and that's the ONLY reason he doesn't fucking abandon the leviathan fight (insane thought for him to even consider) and get them out to safety

[lolotheparagon]

Sofia the First Season 3 in a Nutshell

Cool Hand Fluke - 7/10

Finally, an episode about the mermaids that isnt shit... That is a sentence I just said.

Minimus is Missing - 10/10

Every pegasus in the kingdom has been Pied Pipered away and he mastermind behind this is revealed to be a spoilt kid wizard who really wanted a pegasus for his birthday and decided to steal every horse in the kingdom cos he can. He also gets a rock ballad villain song. Yknow, this show really surprises you sometimes.

Cedric Be Good - 9/10

After all this time, Cedric finally has the amulet by swapping it for a fake copy and goes through the five stages of grief cos he doesnt realise he stole his surrogate niece's most priced possession.

Princess Adventure Club - 1/10

Oh, a new princess who's an adventurer? Now that sounds cool! I wonder if there'll be regular adventures she'll take Sofia and the gang to- OH MY GOD AMBER CAN YOU STOP BEING A BITCH FOR 5 MINUTES?? This girl's characterisation really is the prime example of "depending on the writer"

Minding the Manor - 4/10

Aunt Tilly instructs Sofia to housesit her mansion for an afternoon whilst dealing with gargoyles. Then its revealed Tilly wants to pass onto Sofia the role of being a errand girl to everyone else's domestic problems, even though she's like 8

The Secret Library - 6/10

Okay, not a bad start to this Secret Library arc and its a good story about Minimus making amends with his free-spirited big brother. Also Cary Elwes is the villain in this, which was a delight to see. Also Merida's in this and she gives the last good advice out of all the Disney Princesses to Sofia.

New Genie on the Block - -3/10

This is the most whack shit Ive ever seen in a kids cartoon. So a genie is loose in Tangu and theres a genie patrol, who is run BY a genie and he's designed to look like an American cop for some reason and Sofia becomes a honorary deputy throughout the episode. Their flying carpets are designed to look like American police cars but we're in fucking Arabia. WHAT IS THIS DESIGN CHOICE? The kid genie that's supposed causing trouble is just doing party tricks for a group of kids but Sofia and the genie cop chasistise him anyway for breaking the rules (oh yeah there's genie rules and unlike Aladdin, there's like a bajillion of them even though this kid genie isnt even doing that much rulebreaking) and thus ends up causing more trouble. Wow, its like the actual American police. I dont know what the fuck the writers were smoking but its fucking hilarious

The Fliegel Has Landed - 1/10

Jessica DiCicco plays an mean alpha bitch fairy who's just moved next to the trolls and its up to Sofia and Cedric to teach this bully a lesson? Nice! I cant wait for them to squash this nasty bug- oh no theyre redeeming her, for fucks sake!!!

The Princess Ballet - 10/10

Kari is a wonderful side character and Sofia and Amber helping her overcome her crippling perfectionism whilst practicing ballet and hiring a special tutor to teach her in ways she can understand before the big show is super sweet. THIS. This is what Sofia the First is all about

All the Sprite Moves - -5/10

Vivian has moved into a new castle and hates it, so she enlists the help of the sprites to make the castle haunted so her family can leave. There was also a subplot where Clover gets drunk on love potion berries and obsesses over Crackle and apparently these berries are a plot device cos Sofia uses them again to drug the sprites to leave the castle. That was really weird, dont ever do that again.

Sofia in Elvenmoor - 10/10

The most kid friendly acid trip episode you'll ever get. A good lesson about being focussed on what you're doing and not getting distracted by whats around you. Also there was an adorable moment when the King tries to communicate with one of Sofia's critter friends (even though he cant understand squirrel) when he's trying to find her. He also didnt want to cut down an ancient tree when his men were constructing a road and wanted them to build around it, even before he noticed Sofia was in the tree. King Roland's environmentally friendly and thats just neat.

Stormy Lani - 1/10

They really pulled the magical native stereotype with Lani and had the gall to have a white girl teach an indigenous girl to calm her temper cos her emotions change the weather. WOW. That is Steven Universe levels of racist.

Lord of the Rink - 7/10

Huh, imagine that. A good Prince Hugo episode . This one's a flip-around from Just One of the Princes where Hugo worries his interest in a feminine sport like ice skating will cause his friends and his father to mock him and Sofia reassures him to just do the sport and not worry what others think. Nice to see theres no gender double standard in this show.

The Secret Library: Olaf and the Tale of Miss Nettle - 0/10

Once I found out Ms Nettle was getting redeemed, I skipped through the entire episode cos im so DONE with this show redeeming every villain in its path. Why cant we teach kids that sometimes people are just dicks?

Gone With the Wand - 9/10

We meet Cedric's niece, Calista, who adores her uncle as much as Sofia does. Now im entirely convinced Cedric cared for Sofia all this time cos she reminds him of Calista and I find that so sweet. They then go to Merlin's castle where Cedric goes into fanboy mode, manage to imprison an evil sorceress and have Calista learn not to steal stuff thats her favourite colour cos its still stealing. Only downside is why that evil sorceress had to be Morgana. Girl gets way too much hate in fantasy stories.

Bad Little Dragon - 7/10

Weird title aside, its a great Crackle episode where her jealousy over Vivian's new baby dragon is completely justified as the new dragon is not only an international jewel thief, but an adult dragon just with a baby body and talks like an old school gangster. This is the funniest shit

Bunny Swap - 6/10

It's a solid Clover episode where he gets his privilege checked by his doopleganger

Her Royal Spyness - -7/10

SEAL PEOPLE EXIST IN THIS WORLD.

Best In Air Show - 5/10

Minimus has an overbearing mother zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Dads and Daughters Day - 8/10

Sofia gets a similar problem like what she had in Mom's the Word, this time its with her dad. Her and Amber's class are going on a field trip with all their dads and after Hildegarde's remark about Roland not being Sofia's real dad, Sofia fears that because she doesnt have memories of previous dad and daughter trips like Amber, she doesnt believe she's truly his daughter. Cue heartfelt speech from Roland about how he'll always love her and in comes my unintelligble bawling.

Elena and the Secret of Avalor - 8/10

A Sofia the First episode tackling the destruction that imperalism causes to a nation, a new princess protagonist named Elena getting the upper hand and finally getting her crown, her family and her kingdom back from an imperalist bitch? Well, damn, I'm impressed. Although Sofia's family couldve done a lot more and the idea of a Latina princess being trapped inside an amulet that was used by white princesses really bothers me. Like, why couldnt Elena just be in forced exile thanks to the villain or have her be trapped in a magic mirror or some shit?

The Tale of the Noble Knight - 4/10

Kevin Michael Richardson plays an amazingly hammy knight. Shame he wasnt in a better episode.

The Bamboo Kite - 7/10

Nice to see the lesson of respecting both old and new technology and resources. Its just neat.

Beauty is the Beast - 9/10

This time, Sofia gets summoned to help a princess. She meets Charlotte, who's been turned into a beast as a punishment because she was racist to a goblin. Sofia tries to get the goblin and princess to get along and they end up being besties cos they both nerd out over royal stuff. Honestly, I wish Charlotte kept her beast form. Its very ugly cute.

Cauldronation Day - 2/10

Lucinda's having some witch graduation ceremony but her two new friends are both fighting over the position to be the witch of honour so Sofia tries to make them become friends, even though they clearly arent good enough friends to Lucy. Its fucking infuriating how Lucinda never puts two and two together and just makes Sofia her witch of honour and tell her friends to fuck off cos Sofia is right there being supportive.

Camp Wilderwood

Yknow that spoilt wizard kid Wendell from Minimus is Missing? That kid who stole a kingdom's pegasi cos he really wanted one instead of a magic lute? That kid who even took over a small kingdom for the evulz? Lets redeem him and have him befriended by James all because htey both hated going to a summer camp. Great, a terrible slap-dash villain redemption and a mediocre James episode. Man, this kid never gets a good episode.

Royal Vacation - 5/10

"See, parents? The best way to get your family to spend more time with each other is by forcing them to go on vacation! Even if the vacation turns out to be 90 percent a disaster. As long as you come home feeling happy at the end, that's all that matters!"

Hexley Hall - 8/10

Sofia has unlocked new amulet powers and Cedric takes her to his old wizard school to meet Billy West wizard to get more info about the amulet. I love how halfway throughout the episode, Cedric gets interested in Sofia's amulet and you'd think "oh no, is he gonna go back to stealing it again to take over Enchancia?" but thes its immediately dropped as Cedric's friendship with his pet raven suddenly becomes the focus and he goes into papa wolf mode when Sofia is threatened by Billy West wizard later on and he didnt even care about the amulet. Dont know if that was either a writing flub or an intentional twist, but I like it.

The Princess Prodigy - 10/10

Vivian gets manipulated by an evil musical baron who's preying on her musical talent to fuel his own musical magic, by isolating her from her bandmates and making her lash out at her friends, causing them to help her come to her senses and take down the baron. Cue an epic Scott Pilgrim style music magic battle between Sofia, Vivian and the others and you have an absolute baller episode.

One for the Books - 9/10

A nerdy prince named Desmond, who hasnt had a major appearance since Enchanted Science Fair, struggles with an eccentric assignment giving by the best teacher in the entire school (Seriously, I love Mr P, he's such a cool unorthodox teacher and those are the best. He reminds me of my old geography teacher when I was at school) and he's too embrassed to ask for help since he's usually the top student. A good lesson about never being afraid to ask for help and dont give magical growing food to an already magical plant. This is how you get Piranha Plants

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Gale Reviews: ML Season 5 episode 18 Emotion

(So this is completely far ahead in the order and I will likely revisit this when I am able to see it in order. But if this doesnt deter you from reading this review. Spoilers below)

-Andre is here. And is like "Wait, no drama this time?" Then is happy. I am still mad at you andre, but you are a mood

-I really hoped he was planning on leaving

-Wait a minute, they going right into it? Like no drama? Marinette and adrien about to kiss? NO WEIRDNESS? What is this?

-AND RIGHT ON CUE, interuption

-"Was that weird that he left tikki." "Bitch you both weird af"

-WAIT! THEY CONFESSED ALREADY! FUCKING FUCK GLOOB! I WHY WOULD YOU... I... SHIT BALLS DICK HOLE. FUCKING FUCK

-Okay, I am calm. But apparently they havent kissed officially yet

-So Marinette decided to back off on the scheduling thing which is why she doesnt know. Good for her

-Kagami fighting with her mom with kendo swords and then lila shows up...

-Lila... what are you up too. Also Kagami and Adrien are getting introduced as king and queen at this ball which is awkward af because they arent together

-Still has feelings... Oh.... oh no.

-"You arent a precious stone, you're just a stone!' ROASTED. Kagami roasting bitches by the open fire

-No kagami, you SHOULD mean to hurt her

-What the heck, Zoe out here blasting these parties. Good on her.

-Zoe being a good friend here and helping Marinette work stuff out and then giving her a means of getting into the ball.

-So the masks are the way to get in. Also Ali is there. Neat

-Nathalie being passive aggressive is fun

-Lila got denied!

-Kagami laughing over Marinette and adrien being together and having fun. She gets some joy out of that.

-Tikki growing so tired of Marinette's Bulls***

-Good thing those Mask dont have pictures of the person they actually look like.

-Why was adrien stunned at Kagami's ring... Unless... THATS NOT ADRIEN

-Amelie is here and Felix is missing?! Well that confirms my theory

-GET HIS ASS AMELIE

-He didnt invite her to the ball, what the f*** gabe

-"There is always a choice." damn Amelie. Putting Nathalie on blast

-How did she get that dress on so fast. Also Marinette is slaying it.

-They really just copy and pasted that one girl in the background like 5 times

-Chloé just took Marinette because she thinks she's a rich girl. Oh no

-Marinette saying her underling's name was Chloé which is funny to me. Girl shot her insult

-Kagami saying adrien is being the brave assertive guy she always wanted him to be, but Adrien (who I know isnt adrien) is being flirty af. That is Felix, 100%.

-I am like 99% sure Kagami is a sentimonster now

-Adrien/Felix really out here slinging massive dick energy. Like kagami is smitten but cant help but feel its off

-Marinette... thats not Adrien! OH NO

-Gabriel heard the name Marinette and IMMEDIATELY knew s*** was going wrong

-Marinette was precious and I cant help but think, Aww she doesnt

-Wait... IS it adrien? No it cant be something is off. He isnt adrien

-Wow these are lame rich kids

-THERE IT IS! I KNEW IT WAS FELIX

-Where is Adrien?! Also did Chloe just JUMP HER! OMG

-OH SHIT HE JUST TRANSFORMED. Also its dope af

-Wait did he just summon a moon? DID HE JUST GIVE HIMSELF THE POWER OF THANOS!?

-And Chloé is gone. Felix is MVP

-Argos, thats such a cool name

-Gabriel is gone! Felix you lovable little bastard. You are great. Keep it up

-Kagami looks so devastated. BABY GIRL

-Felix cares about his cousin, thats cute

-HE JUST DROPPED MARINETTE IN THE TRASH!

-Marinette wants payback! FOR STRIKEBACK

-OMG! HE GOT A MUSICAL NUMBER! FELIX GOING FULL DISNEY VILLAIN

-OMG I LOVE THIS SO MUCH UNIRONICALLY

-Felix just embracing it. I feel so much joy (10/10)

-Felix also says NO COPS

-Ladybug really letting Felix have it. Go girl!

-Felix just kicked her into a building.

-Wow... so the Peacock miraculous makes him super strong too? wtf

-Felix trying to make a better world with no masters or slaves.

-Tell me youre a sentimonster, without saying you are a sentimonster

-Felix really thought this out. So bascially saying he will thanos the world.

-Ladybug looking for a solution with... NOTHING?!

-Omg there is no solution. OMG THERE IS NO LUCKY CHARM

-Oh.... I get it hehehe

-Ladybug called his bluff.

-Yo... empty paris. Dark

-KAGAMI!

-Wait... Adrien? Did he ... oh he made the sentimonster earlier and snapped adrien first! thats how... OMG

-So he made the moon earlier in a ring. And they did all this to save adrien

-He planned this for weeks. DAMN so he hid it in the fake ring. Smart

-Its kind of funny that Kagami is just swinging at him like crazy, and Felix has been acting like a little kid thinking he did good. I feel kind of sad man

-You can be happy without your father adrien. But everything else you said is true

-Felix realizes he done goofed. Its sad he went from evil to adorable. Baby boy.

-Marinette's plan worked. Because Felix wasnt a true villain. Nice

-So Polygami coming back anyone? BRING ON THE THRUPPLE! -"My friend... My sister." Yea Felix is 100% a sentimonster

-Yo... can i give Felix a hug. He needs a hug

-Oh so now you can make ice cream for the 3 of them. Sure Andre. You bastard

-The ring... Gabriel... you son of a ....

-And apparently Lila knows he's monarch apparently?!

_____________________________________________________________

So I am missing a LOT of what happened. Thankfully it seems like i can piece together a few things.

Adrien, Kagami and Felix are like 99% likely to be Sentimonsters.

Yep... so thats a thing

I think I will rate this a 8/10.

I may not like all the revelations that happened. But Felix stole the show and I loved every scene he was in.

[loopy4lu]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Lets go over my haul and my thoughts on gifttsssss

Vintage Staedtler Pencils - SO COOL. They were produced in Germany before ww2 and stopped production during the war, they were from my pop and im pretty sure he just like... owned these? I love his weird "junk" gifts he used to have a little mystery box thing when we visited. Im prob gonna make him a drawing with them.

Big ass art set - From one of my friends, absolutely MASSIVE. Its got oils paints and pastels, watercolour paints, markers and pencils, normal pencils, acrylic paints and extra goodies. Like the whole galore. Im gonna make her an artwork too ( ´∀`)

Hardcover illustrated The Hunger Games copy - From my bestfriend, we spotted it in a bookstore together and we both rlly wanted it, and she remembered, found it cheaper (my little sales guru ♡) and gave me it. I LOVE MY BEST FRIEND SOOOOO MUCH (*/∀＼*)

Full Percy Jackson and the Olympians series - Up to the 4th book rn (had already read 1+2 and got 3+4 as an early present) and im gonna cry so hard reading The Last Olympian. I read the Magnus Chase books when i was younger and grew to love them more, and kinda decided i wanted to know the Annabeth lore.

Full Heroes of Olympus series - Will, in fact, once again, CRY. Like hey if i cant get all the details whats the point??

The Art of Feminism - My nans gift (along eith cash (　$▽$)) its about feminist art throughout history, plus its meanings and contexts. As an art nerd and feminist it was so awesomeeeee!!

4 plastic babies in matching fruit costumes... - Its a running joke gift with my friend ik its weird (^^;))) but.. yea she buys me babies every year, they do get better tho. the first year was one that had a motion sensor and would cry every time it sensed... yknow... motion. we were walking around the shops btw. for hours. and i was stuck. with a crying baby. and either it would cry in my bag, or i would have to hold it so people didnt think i was a creep and it would cry constantly... anyways one of the new babies has already been decapitated and de-limbed (never trust your friends with a baby guys)

Icecream from my teacher - I think she felt bad she didnt hear the birthday message at assembly or smth ( ´;ﾟ;∀;ﾟ;) but it was yummers

Chocolate - also yummers

So that basically sums up my gift haul... pretty great and i think theres still more to come!! Cant wait to read ALL MY BOOKS MUHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! AND USE ALLLLLL THE ART SUPPLIES YOULL NEVER STOP MEEEEEE

[indigo474]

July 15th-electric energy-

so much happens in my life.. daily.. so much life. my back doesnt hurt, i'm not exactly sure what i did, the weight was relatively light, 135.. i think i may have been in my head a bit and not really focused on what i was doing and ouch.. i did upper body on Thursday and it was heavy.. he really pushes me it seems more so on upper.. 112.5x2.. he keeps upping it.. i was disappointed in myself with the whole back thing.. i feel like it was a set back, because it was. James says it it all part of the process, i have to trust that it is and not be hard on myself..Kika looks great. Not the same happy pup but getting there. she's moving a little slower. the cute guy said bye to me Bye April.. see i remembered.. funny thing is.. i don't know his name.. I'll have to ask him the next time i see him. he's such a baby.. 20 something.. he's always talking about books.. he had a copy of the art of war in his gym bag.. intelligence is so sexy.. oh you read 💦

I was going to see my friend today but decided not too for various reasons. Mads has off from work and wanted to spend time together.. i was fine doing that but i had to tell her to stop treating me like shit.. i told her i didn't want to be around her. she gets in these moods where she is just on me.. everything i say she has a negative comment. she's been ok since i said something to her. we were going to go to the beach- she would rather go to a pool so we are going to the pool..

in the past few days i had 3 cardinals fly in front of me. 2x in my car and 1x in the woods. numbers numbers everywhere.. i realize i give meaning to things but dam it's weird seeing the same numbers everywhere.. 322 constantly.. i was running through the woods and 2 little dogs appeared out of nowhere.. i think i scared them just as much as they scared me.. i was so pissed- i cursed at their owner.. I tired to run and failed.. my inner critic came out loud.. hard. i didnt really fail i just didn't do what i wanted to do and i started to really beat myself up over it and i haven't gone down that path in a while but it's still there.. i had to catch myself.. why are you doing this to yourself? Why? I dont even know who's voice it is.. is it mine? x? my mom? who's voice is tell me im a total waste of space and a failure and nothing and unlovable and worse.. i cant imagine i was born thinking those things abut myself. And i catch myself and tell myself none of it is true.. don't fight it, love it, show yourself compassion and support and be your own friend. there is an old version of myself who would have quit a long time ago. there is an old version of me who wouldn't have even been able to recognize the loop of self hate that was being played inside her head, because it was normal to have those thoughts and feeling about herself.. this all happens within a 15 minute time frame as i am walking and running through the woods battling myself.. at war with myself. By the time i get to my car i feel like i've had some sort of breakthrough.

I was told i am too white by a black co worker. It happened during a supervisors meeting. there was a lot of cross talk going on so im not sure if anyone else heard it. I literally had to bite my lip to not say what i wanted to say because i knew if i said it the room would fall silent and i would be escorted out the door or this co worker would have wanted to fight me in the parking lot.. so i just documented it.. yep learned all about documentation in training. it's not the first comment i've received about me being white. something else happened this week.. with one of my reps and the ice queen. I documented it but.. i have a feeling.. i dont know what but this might not go away and it will be my word and the reps word against the ice queens word.. not sure how well i will make out in this situation.. the ice queen was wrong and she knows it.. i dont have anything to hide as i wasn't the one doing the talking.. i tried to make things better.. i learned a valuable lesson.. i just dont know if there is going to be a price to pay for said lesson.. there usually is.. i'll know come next thursday.

My mom texted me that my Aunt has cancer.. she thought i should know. I saw her at the park last year 2x and kept running. i told myself if i ever see her again i would stop and talk. i dont know how to tell Mads as i think she will be upset. I thought maybe something was wrong with Ryan. I guess not.. still in jail.

Other things .. explainable.. i feel the electricity in the air. there is a current of excitement.. i cant explain it but i can feel it. i can see it too.. in the clouds and the trees- the birds and butterflies.. i can feel it in the air- i can feel it.. so many people telling me they feel lucky.. i feel lucky i feel lucky.. its a good energy.. its a great energy..

the office narcissist left a gift on my desk this week. last week she ignored me and talked shit to my reps about me.. this week gifts.. i know i shouldn't be surprised.. i mean, i was married to someone who talked shit on me.. but i'm still surprised at how shitty people can be..

I have no idea what i'm doing as far as moving.. i saw a house but its too much house for me and honestly thats not what i really want.. i do and i dont.. a 30 year mortgage sounds horrible.. truly fucking horrible.. i dont want more stuff.. I want less stuff and more experiences.. sitting in an office all day is not living.. people laugh and say i spend more time at work then at home.. thats not a good thing that is messed up that we are made to believe thats normal.. so yeah.. still trying to figure out what it is i want to do..

over

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. Just so everyone knows, this is how the “number one worldwide phenomenon” LO ranks on the other Webtoons servers*, ranked from best to worst (November 2021)

Webtoons France: #6

Webtoons LATAM: #9

Webtoons Germany: Doesn’t Rank at all

Webtoons Korea/NAVER: Doesn’t rank at all, one of their lowest rated series ever on the whole site.

So it’s only Number 1 on a single server, meanwhile does either ok, lags behind, or is rejected outright everywhere else. Meanwhile other Western made imports to these other servers (such as Let’s Play and Down to Earth) all do easily top five, while True Beauty ranks as number one in all other servers except the English one, where it’s number 2. Unless America, Canada, and the UK are the “World”, then LO is not as popular as Webtoons’ marketing team wants you to believe.

* Webtoons Indonesia, China, and Thailand are excluded from this list since LO isn’t on any of these. 

2. is it just mean to say the romance in Lo is just not good? like i didnt feel anything when they kissed, it just seemed really random. their flirting isnt very cute and it cant seem to decide if its wants them to act like actual adults or teenagers. them constantly being shy after while just gets boring when it happens over and over again. also it constantly has other characters say how "in love" they are which tbh only says to me even rs knows its not written well so she needs to spell it out.

3. why do the stans act like rachel "spending years" on lo means we cant critique it? a lot of things have years put into them, doesnt mean its now flawfree and we have to care about their poor egos. if rachel doesnt want critique, then she should have never agreed to being published much less putting her stuff online to begin with. i swear lo stans have no idea how the actual world works.

4. geniuenly want to know wha's going on in that lily white head of rachel's to not think its REALLY WEIRD to have hades lust after a tiny version of his mother and have persephone be turned on by hades looking like his abusive, murderous dad. like what the fuck is that. what is that saying exactly??

5. cannot stand how lo fans (or just hxp fans in general) claim there are "several versions" where hades doesnt kidnap persephone and she actually elopes willingly with him bc as soon as you ask for proof of this they get awfully quiet. like if there are "several" versions, show us at least ONE source of proof then. and no, it cant be LO, some fanfic, or a tumblr post. give us an actual source from ancient greece and we'll believe you, not going off your word that "it totally exists, trust me".

6. lo hades absolutely seems the type to buy nfts and no i will not elaborate on that

7. idk how the stans were like "how is lo a white savior narrative theyre all blue and green lmao" as if that was some epic own? or that hades being an ugly shade of brown in a human disguise (as in not his actual race? thas literally a disguise?) "proves" theyre not white like?? even rachel's fancast was all white people? even if they dont have races persephone being like "hey dead people i killed! be thankful for what im doing for my own purposes!' is literally a white savior narrative like -

8. Is there actually an anti-lore olympus server? If so, I'd like to get in if possible.

From OP: Yup! Search up ‘anti lo discord’ since it’s the hashtag I used.

9. The more i read LO the more it feels annoying and cringy. From the art to the conversations it’s just a shit show basically. Birthday cards, making Persephone look like a toddler? Hades turning into a giant spider? The humans who were the exact copy of Hades and Persephone?? The jury show? Like? The entire comic is just a cringefest. Not to mention the stans who defend this comic and RS like she’s personally going to save their life.  My god had RS said that LO would be a fanfic telenovela webtoon of greek mythology then there would be no problems at all, but to say that this a modern adaptation and retelling of the mythology?? And to say that you know greek mythology better than greek people themselves?? Is this woman having delusion instead of actual food for her meals?

10. i also dont get why rachel keeps making a point persephone is so innocent and would never hurt a fly when its like?? isnt the whole point of the story supposed to be her growing up and being the "badass dread queen" its been promising us? bc it makes no sense to keep insisting she's this precious lil bean but also tell us she will also be some dark girlboss when she's not allowed to own or accept that part of herself? like even her "dark" side is just some vague "feeling"she cant control :/

[yelenassecretlover]

medieval au hcs [sfw] pt 2

anime: attack on titan

characters: erwin, armin, mikasa

a/n: no thoughts head empty, y’all know I’m on mobile and I cant copy and paste from the google doc I work on to here, its so annoying I have to boot up my old ass desktop to copy and paste :)

Erwin:

King, helped lead his kingdom into a golden age. Although it seems war is just over the horizon, maybe he can help prevent it once again?

It seems as if King Erwin has been in power for centuries…but that cant be. Rumors says he’s over 300 yrs old but those are just rumors

Can either be extremely intelligent and knowledgeable or a complete himbo, there is no in between

A Dilf, has a bunch of daughters who he loves dearly, will behead you if you so much as look at them in the wrong way

Had a beautiful garden made, named it “of eden” as he located every flower and beautiful plant in the kingdom and planted them there for his partner.

Is not intimidated by the demons he calls knights Levi and Yelena. One of the few people who isn’t scared of them, occasionally messes with them

Loves PARTIES, a new ball or some event is occurring every week. Truly he just makes up any excuse to party. (Levi’s usually stuck as the head of the party planning committee, claims to hate it but he volunteered)

“ The butler recently bought a new puppy. Let's celebrate the life of the animal with a ball. Invite everyone”

Many of his conquests and goals are questionable, but no one dares question him (except his daughters they’re always pestering him with new questions)

Has a throne room that he does sit in, but you’ll have a better time finding him in his office (he thinks the throne room is kind of tacky but Levi and Yelena insist on him using it)

Was raised in royalty his entire life but spent his young adulthood sneaking off into the villages, where he met Levi (No surprise, to his dismay, his daughters do the same)

Armin:

Baker, inherited his parents business after they disappeared in a trip to the forbidden land

Extremely curious and inquisitive, questions everything around him. Even owns a couple of banned books but don't tell anyone

Always smells like the latest delight on the menu, on Mondays you’ll smell Snickerdoodle, Wednesday Blueberry muffins and Friday, well Friday is experiment day but sweet is one word to describe it.

Wears an apron regardless if he’s in the kitchen or not, although food isn’t the only thing cooking (some say at 3am you can heard weird spells being cast, but in the morning you merely smell the freshly made bread so who knows)

“ ha..silly rumors we all know casting spells is illegal. I’m just preparing for the next day”

Extremely kind and caring but not naive, picks up on things quickly. Book smart and Street smart

Humble origins. Not that it bothers him he’s always cared more about the way things are done, then the actual things themselves. To hung up on the can it be done not worried on the should it be, you already know this story

Animals really like him, although he hates it because they’re constantly stealing his sweets, he needs those to make a living so he’s a bit stressed

Such a sweet and lovely aura to him, no surprise he’s as sweet as his cookies

Constantly getting flour on his books, when he opens them he’s not sure if its dust or flour but he is currently in a coughing fit so he won't notice

Wanted to follow Eren and Mikasa into knighthood but didnt, although not because of his psychique (baking requires quite the workout, so he’s a bit toned) but rather decided to continue his families legacy in the sweets department

Mikasa:

Knight, Joined for two reasons, for her friend but also her loyalty to her Kingdom.

Stern face but very warm once spoken to, looks mean but is the sweetest

Due to the kingdom being in a golden age her full potential has not been shown, but it has been noticed. Sworn into the head knights team at a young age, the first to do so.

Contrary to popular belief not in love with Eren, she’s very protective of all her close friends, the mom friend of the group. The one you can count on bringing in extra blankets for the mission

Doesn’t drink no matter how hard the day may have been, has to make sure Eren or Sasha dont get into any trouble

“Captain was pissed when you two snuck into his office, the next time you do some dumb shit like that I’ll snitch on you myself”

Touch starved, attention starved, really craves love but instead spends her days training to distract herself

Extremely agile, great fighter, master at swordcraft. Basically amazing at everything she does, Armin tried to bribe her to join his bakery, she refused.

Women of a few words, her actions are how she expresses herself

Cherishes the gifts given to her by the villagers no matter how useless

“Mika that’s the 10th letter opener you were given you do not need that give it away” “……no”

When not in her usual knight attire, she wears lovely summer dresses that go just below her knees, even in winter, claims she cant feel cold. (funny.... Levi claims this too)

[saint-nevermore]

hey, i have no idea if your account is even still active but uh you know that Spamton puppet you posted awhile back? yeah thats fucking sick and i wanna try to make my own but i cant find any good tutorials online on how the fuck a ventriloquist dummy works (ventriloquism is not something i ever wanted to persue in life)

*presses the cold steel of my 12 gauge to your forehead* tell me how it works. now. specifically the jaw mechanism

im still active >:) so like im not a puppet maker that was my first one (who now haunts me now my hyperfixation has moved on) but i pretty much just googled the mechanism and copied what i saw. its a string that attaches to the jaw and goes down the neck tube and out a hole near where you hold it. he needed a new mechanism at the end that pulled it up instead because his head and jaw were stupid heavy when all painted etc. ftr hes barely functional because of how heavy he is and the neck tube is slowly buckling so hes a really cool thing to Have i guess if a life-size spamton is your think (and i must reiterate - it no longer is for me, help) bit actually using him aint an option until i decide to fix him :'3 here were my notes but i had to compromise a lot

(also please do not rp gunthreatening strangers thats really weird i almost just didnt answer)

[red-sector-rivendell]

media reccs? 👀 since apparently you are a man of good taste?

Wow thank you 😏 I have a masterlist of movies that have changed me I often recommend to people, I'll just copy and paste here with quick synopses lol, it's kinda long. I'm not super great at writing synopses tho so bear with me

Dead Poets Society (1989)

One of my favorite movies of all time and a total classic. It's about a group of boys at a strict boarding school who are inspired by their new English teacher (played by Robin Williams) to think for themselves and chase their dreams. This movie literally changed my life lol

Quadrophenia (1979)

This movie is based off of the story behind the concept album by The Who of the same name. It follow the life of a young man named Jimmy who is in a gang called the Mods. Theres this huge gang war between them and the Rockers (I think that's their name, it's been a while since i watched it) and Jimmy questions his beliefs about coming-of-age and his values in life throughout the film

Cabaret (1972)

Based off of the Broadway musical of the same name, this movie is about a British man who moves to Germany during the beginning of the rise of Nazis. He meets a woman who basically turns his world upside down, and it follows their love affair and sexuality and anti-semitism, and it's hilarious and heart wrenching and a beautiful movie

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

This is a super trippy romance film. Basically in the universe of this movie, theres a technology that is developed that can delete memories of an entire person from your mind while you are in a dream-like state, and the main character of this movie (played by Jim Carrey) decides to undergo the procedure after a bad breakup. Its soooo good I highly recommend this movie

It's Such a Beautiful Day (2012)

This is an animated film about a man named Bill who is going through brain cancer. Its told from the perspective of an unnamed narrator essentially communicating everything Bill sees, hears, and experiences. This is the movie that got me into film and it is still a complete masterpiece and one of the most beautiful movies I've ever seen

The Dirties (2013)

Loved this one a lot back in high school, it's been a while since I watched it. This is a film made in Canada about a high schooler named Matt Johnson and his friend Owen who decide to make a short film for their class about them killing the gang at their school that bullies them, and things take a dark turn. It's a hilarious movie and hits pretty close to home for me in a lot of ways haha

Logan's Run (1976)

Great movie, pretty cheesy though so be warned. This is based off a book with the same name, and it takes place in the future where most of humanity is wiped out except for a small society that lives under a domed structure. No one is allowed to leave the dome, and to control overpopulation, no one is allowed to live past the age of 30. It's really bizarre but I love this movie

Donnie Darko (2001)

Pretty sure this was Jake Gyllenhaal's first big hit when he was super young (I think he was like 19 in this movie but I'm not sure) basically about this kid, Donnie Darko, who is somewhat schizophrenic and has a habit of sleepwalking. After one particular incident he has a near-death experience and starts seeing a man in a bunny costume everywhere who makes him do weird stuff. Another pretty trippy movie with a crazy ending

American Psycho (2000)

Honestly I'm sure a few on this list you've probably seen (most likely this one included) but I didnt wanna leave any out because they're all so good. If you haven't seen this, it's about a Wall Street executive named Patrick Bateman who is a materialistic phony by day and a serial killer by night. I tried to read the book but the inner dialogue was really hard to get through lmao. Awesome movie though huge recommend.

Clockwork Orange (1971)

Yet another trippy one. And fuck it's been a long time since I've seen it so I might get some stuff wrong here. But it's basically about this serial rapist guy who hangs out with this group of goons and they all like to go beat up homeless people and shit, but the main character gets captured and has to go through reformation therapy to make him a better person. It's an extremely bizarre movie but soooo good and kind of hilarious lol

Creep (2014)

Of course this is on my list haha. If you haven't seen it yet, it's a horror movie about this freelance film guy who answers an ad on craigslist to help a man with cancer film a movie for his unborn son. And shit gets weird real fast. One of my favorite horror movies ever, I wouldnt say it's super scary but it's fun as fuck

Hereditary (2018)

If I'm being honest, I don't like a lot of big movies made in super recent years and especially not horror movies (mostly because they're all cheap cash grabs with no substance) but this one is an exception for me. Hereditary is fucking masterful in my opinion, legitimately creepy as hell and well-produced and well written. To put the plot as vaguely as possible without spoiling anything, it's about a family (mostly the mother) who go through some crazy fucked up shit. That's literally all I can say without giving anything away. Super good flick, big recommend

Gattaca (1997)

This list isn't in any particular order, and I love all these movies to death, but if I had to rank them this would probably be on the lower end. It's not a bad movie, it's still great but it's just not as life-changing as the other ones lmao. This takes place in the future where genetic modifications have progressed to a point where you can modify your unborn child's DNA to have the perfect baby. This has led to, essentially racial bias against those who never had that procedure when they were born. The main character was not one of these "special" children, but he wants an extremely prestigious job which requires that of the employee. Through the film, he is trying to fake his identity and fool the company into thinking he is one of these perfect people. Still a great film

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)

Johnny Depp, man, he is something else. I LOVE this movie. Based off a true story and a book written by the man who lived it, Hunter S. Thompson, this follows the adventure of the writer and his attorney as they go on a drugged-out, psychedelic romp through Las Vegas with the original intention being to cover a story on a motorcycle race, but things go off the rails as they both terrorize the entire city in a way. Just a fun ride the whole way, a great movie

The Truman Show (1998)

God I'm realizing this list is long as fuck. Don't watch all of these movies, it might take you a lifetime lmao. Anyway, this is a classic Jim Carrey movie and another one you've probably seen. But again, if you haven't, this movie is about a man whose entire life has been fabricated and shot for television without him knowing. Super great, super moving, fantastic film 10 outta 10 I gotta wrap this shit up

A Scanner Darkly (2006)

A lesser known Keanu Reeves movie, but fuck I wish more people have seen this. This is one of my favorite movies of all time, and it's based off a book which is just as amazing. This movie takes place in the near future, where facial recognition technology has progressed wayyy too far, and drugs have gotten to the point of no return. The plot follows a detective who is undercover in a junkie house trying to figure out who is the top of the drug dealing totem pole, but ends up wrapped in the junkie lifestyle a little too deeply. Seriously, I recommend this movie to everyone who asks, it's so damn good

Fight Club (1999)

Another popular one. If you havent seen it, it's based off a book by Chuck Palahniuk following the story of a man (the main character actually doesnt have a name lol) who meets a guy named Tyler Durden who changes his entire perspective on how the world works. They start an underground boxing club together to help themselves and other men blow off steam and get away from the capitalist consumer-centric lifestyle they are forced into. Big twist at the end, great movie five stars on yelp

Harold and Maude (1971)

This is a weird one. Gotta say. It's about a guy in his 20s who meets an old woman at a funeral and falls in love with her. Sounds pretty ok at face value but theres a lot of really strange subplots and a huuuuge twist at the end (one of the subplots being the guy compulsively fakes his suicide to get his mother's attention) big recommend

Polyester (1981)

This one I cant even explain u just have to watch it its fucking bizarre

Fargo (1996)

Ok lightning round on the synopses, this movie is about a man who wants to commit fraud by hiring guys to kidnap his wife so her father can pay them ransom and instead the husband gets the money but everything goes wrong it's really good

Bad Times at the El Royale (2018)

Another modern movie I actually like, last time I watched this I was on shrooms and it was crazy but it's about this hotel right on the border of california and (Nevada I think?) And all these weird people are staying at it and there are twists at every turn and chris hemsworth is a cult leader in it its great

Memento (2000)

GREAT MOVIE GOD PLEASE WATCH THIS ONE it's about a man who develops short term memory loss after witnessing the rape and murder of his wife AND WHEN I SAY THERE ARE TWISTS LIKE EVERY TEN MINUTES I MEAN IT. The film is chronologically backwards, in that the first scene takes place at the end of the story and works back from there in increments of like 5 minutes. Basically each scene is a segment of time that this guy remembers before his memory loss kicks in and he forgets and FUCK it's so good please god watch it

Almost Famous (2000)

This is another one that would probably be low on my ranking but still a great and fun movie, it's about this kid that wants to write articles about rock stars for the rolling stone (based off a true story btw) and he ends up running away to go ride on a tour bus with some band and gets into all types of shenanigans and its great and sad

Parasite (2019)

Another modern movie I love, fuck this is getting too long lmao. Poor family wants to make money and they hatch a scheme to pretend to be bougie and work for this rich family but shit gets weird and everything goes wrong and it's so good (also literally the only film ever that made me speechless afterwards)

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Pretty much lives up to the hype, I totally forgot the plot but it's pretty damn good I remember that lmao

The Warriors (1979)

Fun movie, theres a bunch of teen gangs in New York and the leader of all of em is like "hey we should rally all the gangs together and fuck up the cops so we can rule this city" but then he gets shot by someone in the crowd and the gang The Warriors gets blamed so the whole movie is them running from all the other gangs so they can get back to home base and it's just an all around fun time movie

12 Monkeys (1995)

THIS MOVJE IS CRAZY it takes place in the future where a virus has almost completely wiped humans off the face of the earth so these scientists send this guy back in time to figure out where it came from so they can stop it from ever happening but obviously everything goes wrong and yadda yadda yadda it's amazing

Waking Life (2001)

Gonna preface this by saying this film is definitely not for entertainment, it's kind of an arthouse-type flick. It's the type of movie you have to think really really hard about to watch. The basic plot is the main character is stuck inside his own lucid dream, and is walking around listening to all these characters in his dream talk to him about, idk like the meaning of life and consciousness and shit. It's really good if you're in the mood for that type of thing.

Okay I'm finally done, you probably didnt expect this but I've been meaning to put my movie recommendations on this blog anyway haha. I deleted some just cause it was getting wayyyy too long. If u want a shorter list I can just give u like a top 5 in DMs but there u go have at it, every movie on that list is a banger I swear

[isshusgotissues]

ok ok ok so the refs from today. im just talking as perap does so feel free to ignore this

- it was kind of like a test to see how i could balance out quality with quantity. my canvas size has bumped up in resolution since the post from last year and im finally coloring line art, hallelujah. (i cant believe it took me so long to start doing that my old stuff was SO washed out with just black line art)

- tbh i did most of the extras (alt outfits etc) bc i thought it would be fun. and it was! well, the line art was. the coloring... oh god, what a drag. its so boring. so much procrastination... but im glad i finally got it out and just a little over a year after the first ones.

- so ya i said galar was like 90% done and NOW its like 200% done, and with that being said

- "yOu DiDnT dO tWiLiGhT wInGs ExClUsIvE oUtFiTs OR ThE cOrViKnIgHt TaXi DrIvEr" and my response is: when does it end, susan? MAYBE i will end up doing them. but it took me two months along with all that art i posted earlier this month and im tired. im not doing them today, not tomorrow, not for a while. galar is DONE i want to move on

- so the take away from the test is. i am not doing that again. JDGFG. the alt outfits and designs (basically the entirety of part 3)... i wont be including those in ref batch posts from now on. it was a lot. when i draw extras like that, ill just do it whenever. im not making them priority like i did with the posts from today.

- tbh i MIGHT aim to get gen 7 done this year. i can try it. i ACTUALLY have a few sketches done already so theres hope.

ok so now for comments on specific things

- firstly, tumblrs image limit forces me to put multiples on the same canvas, which i finally decided to take advantage of and have a few interactions that i wouldnt have done if i could just post them all individually so i think thats neat. adds some substance i think.

- again mustard isnt urshifu bc i couldnt choose which one he wouldve been. tho ngl hyde wouldve been cute as a kubfu

- ik honey has a team but i didnt like any of them for her so its free real estate

- yes klara and avery are the ONLY ones with gloves and dynamax bands. shhh i know. i know.

- nia was also kinda free real estate bc her only known pokemon is tyrantrum and. i didnt like that. i also didnt like galarian meowth for her either. so tbh i did it to match her earrings, but also i dont have ANY pikachu girls as of yet and i wanted to fix that (i say that as i already posted a pikagirl a few weeks ago HDHDGS)

- sighs. sordward and shielbert... i NEEDED a reason to justify their stupid hair ok i DONT care about anything else. i THINK it makes them better. maybe. probably not. and also i copy and pasted them despite trying to not be lazy with my art bc i just fucking hate them i dont care.

- the macro cosmos employees were actually inspired by this made by flare-gamer-64! its the reason i didnt go with aggron for peony. and at first i thought mawile for one of my designs would turn out weird but i actually think its fine now

- glorias mom is glaceon bc free real estate clause. and i just threw in hops and leons mom bc why not.

- snom anthro. s n o m a n t h r o

- close ups of allister and gordie bc i needed eye color refs for them. also wanted to draw gordies natural hair cuz hes cute

- i DONT think we see bede in his gym uniform BUT my official plushie of him has it so thats my reason for including him and completing the quintet of the kids in their uniforms.

- let us all take a moment to appreciate the confirmation that klara has feetpaws. ive started drawing hands more but im probably never drawing human feet. ever.

- annnd ball guy. what is ball guy you ask? ball guy is ball guy. dont question it.

- oh god i HATE the tundra outfit dont EVER make me draw it again shoes AND bags god the very last things i had to do involved the tundra outfits bc i was putting it off for last uhfjdvd

[camphorror]

the only friend who i coul talk about this stuff isnt really interested in talking about me anymore so im just going to type all this overhsaring cap while trying to calm down from crying for 30 minuets an throwing up from the crying

i have an :::aunt”” who hates me because she is literally a raicst who stopped talking to my mother when she decided to marry someone who isnt from the same ethnicity as her and then of course she hates me for being a tainted person for his horrible offense!! i never really knew her she neve rinvited us to birthdays or anything she did at her house with her evil daughters and we did invite them for birthdays because i just very much remember not understanding why she is so distant (compared to my “”normal”” aunt) and just always wanted her to like me up until i grew up old enough to understand why it was that they ere all like this

now fucking 7 YEARS ago  was at my grandmas and i was looking at old photos and back then i was very much into ww2 and like 30s-40s time period in europe and all and i was fascinated by all the old photos she had and she allowed me to take a lot of old photos some she wanted me to bring back so i just scanned them and brought them back and some she just let me have i swear to god she let me have them some were of people she didnt know she didnt let me have any of her old photos besides the ones that had 2 copies but she pm let me have all of my grandfather’s (who i have never met) photos from the 30s-40s and these photos were my favourite ting in the world i usedto go over them once every month since fucking 2014 to see if they ware ok i recently planned to try and get an album for them bc i dont think it’s kept well in a box if you ask every close friends i have how many times i told them want to see something cool and showed them these photos i love these photos with all of my heart and they fascinate me i even wanted to san all of them and try to find maybe some site or subreddit that can help me translate some of the writings on the back of some of them as idk what language it even is and it’s all in cursive. not once in the past 7 fucking years (ok actually once but it wasnt here it as my evil aunt) did my grandma ever ask me for these photos because she kne wi have them and i keep them and i cherise them 

then suddenly last week when my supposedly normal aunt wwas here because my scumbag aunt visited my grandma when she had fucking pneumonia and my grandma got sick and she’s generally been like weird mentally lately like she’s not 100% in the moment. anyway they were both at her house when she was sick and suddenly suddenly my supposedly normal aunt claims that my grandma wants all the photos back. but does she say it herself? no. my aunt tells it to my mother.i got pissed pff and offended that she didnt call me. i am not a child. after some insufferable back and forth my grandma says she just wants the photos she’s in. ok. whatever. my aunt says she’ll go get copies of them and bring me back i dont care. then suddrnly when i went there to give it to them my aunt asks me if i have more photos and i like yes sure i have [everything i mentioned above] she flis out like i didnt know youhave them give them to me i didn’t know it i will copy of all of them!! like ok first of all not my fault you didnt know you live in almost the other side of the country sincr 2010 youre not suopposed to know that i took photos 7 years ago. notlike i have to share every detail. second of all i liteally did tell her something about this once. ok i tell her i will give her all the photos before she goes home she has a friend who works at a photogrhy store who can copy them for cheap.

so now i know the reason this is happening is bascially my “normal” aunt and ym evil aunt literally manipulate my grandma into caring about these stuff because i know the thing here. THE CRIME here is that my evil aunt does not have these photos. i know she wants them, the reason i took them 7 years ago is that i knew there was no way on earth my mother would have these at any point and i just decided i want them (and my grandmother ALLOWED ME). but whatever. copy the photos have it your way i dont care

now my aunt came to take them todaynd i told her when she called “you  are giving me back the original photos i got them 7 years ago it’s not fair to take them” she says ok. i meet her downstairs and i chat to her and i tell her again “really you give me back the original photos ok” and suddenly when she physically has them iin her hand she says no!!! i will give you back the copies!! i say no youre lying i wouldnt have given shit if i knew you’d do this. she starts making excuses about how they need to have the originals because what f they’d want to give it to a fucking holocaust msueusm. i tell ehr why on earth give a meuseum original photos give them the copies. she says no and i was tired and irritated and i just told her whatever she got what she wants by lying so i dont care anymore. and i left her in the street and went home. i lost it on the way it happened an hour ago and im still crying. i cant believe this shit happened. these photos were mayb one of the most important things in my life. i just cried annd cried and lost it and lost my cool and started screaming and hitting everything. i tried calling her telling her it’s not fair she lied to me why is she doing this. i got sick of playing stupid and i said i know they only did this because they want my other aunt to have the photos. she then accused me (and my mother) of being the liars who took the photos and never said i had them (what the fuck?) and then lying saying we don’t have more (literally not true) and then she called me A CRAZY INSANE PERSON for crying and freaking out and telling her i know why all this shit is happening. and she said she doesnt want to talk to me becaus ei’m crazy and she hung up. i literally fell down crying and threw up and hit myself for being so stupid. i now understand why she wanted ALL the photos. including those of random who no one knows. because they just want them to have it.

i know my grandma doesnt love me as much as she loves them. my grandma also stopped talking to my mother once she got married but then she “got around it” but my evil aunt is he rfavourite daughter and her kids are her favourite grandkids and my “nrmal” aunt and them always meet toether and do family stuff together and never with us and they never see anything wrong with it.they even accuse me of “contributing to this stupid fight” even tho it’s insane to even say this like this thing started 2 years before i was born because of RACISTS and i was treated like shit as a child by these ppl but i’m still seen on par with their behaviour!!! so they dont care. i actually wholly believe my grandma want my shitty aunt to have those photos actually. i fele so stupid. this was my favourite possession in the world and i was stupid enough to let it go. i still cant stop crying until now i actually hate everything. im sick of all those insane people in every side of my favmily there are insane people on my father’s side i have sociopathic theives who dont even care their brother fucking died from brain cancer and most of which i dont even fucking know and on my mother’s side there are just a bunch fo self obsessed freaks who hate me for the crime of being born

[helloyoufuckinbastards]

I had a dream, where I was in my house, and someone took something from me. And ya know, the dream is similar to the time where thor’s hammer got stolen. Because a bigass blue thing, took my hammer of power or something, idk, and locked me in a room. Cuz Im apparently grounded or something. I sure as hell aint imprisoned. I just cant get the hammer back, “to dangerous for kids” apparently. Anyway I try to get it back, but everytime that I fail, it gets reseted. Like a game. And im the only one who knows. How frustrating. Anyways at one point I get fed up and didn’t try to get the hammer, but I fail, and I was like “FUCK THIS”, and climbed up the ledge of a window. And my big blue babysitter is like “What are you doing??” “Im gonna kill myself.” But then like I dont. Because I dont know what will happen if I do. And what a waste of life if I actually die. So I just climb in, and I make a deal with my Big and Blue sitter, and was like “Okay, fine, I wont take my hammer to school. Fine. But can I atleast take the stuff from my bag? The bag where the hammer is? “ And he was like “fine.” And I took my stuff, a coin that produced a copy of itself every 9 days, gold (idk why but i apparently had like gold bars, comical ones), and one other thing. I forgot. But I remember being sad, because I cant bring my ship that can fold up neatly into my pocket to school. I was very sad over it.  

Anywayz I end up in school, and there was apparently a quizbee going on. And apparently everyone in this school is magical. Ya know, elves, fairies, wizards, witches. The do. And it was a bunch of subjects like, Math, Science, History, etc.  a round of 4 questions. difficult ones. Our group won the Math section. I joined in on Science cuz I love me some science. And I lost. Anyways I leave because I have something to do apparently, and then what followed is weird. I go to the sci lab becuz idk Imma say goodbye to all the test tubes I failed. And there was a bunch of elves gathered around the fridge. I ask whassup, they say a serial killer is on the loose and they are decapitating hands of their victims as trophies and then putting them in the science lab fridge.  What then followed is a blur of me doing battle against an army, leveling up, now I have a sword that can turn into whatever I want, and if I turn it into a bow and draw the string, an arrow made of energy will appear. Anyways the elves see my awesome level up, and decides to join in the battle, and we won.   So I went back to school, and they gave me the hands of the killed elves, and I was like “What the fuck do you want me to do???” i was very disgusted by the severed hands. becuase. they. were. severed. hands. And they were like “You can restore them back to like,” And I was like “gross but okay, I guess” and they dumped the load of hands into my arms, and while trying now to internally gag, I restore them back to life, in a ball of light. 

And I went back to school, The quizbee is still happening, and like blah blah, I get bored, I leave. And there was a classmate who was selling sweet gulaman. and Jughead from Archie comics is classmate. And me and Jughead are like, “It’s 35 usd, but it’s 75lbs,” “Yes, but we can get a 8oz gulaman for 20php back in the quizhall.” and I was like “Yes but you forget one crucial thing. This is brown gulaman. The gulaman they serve in the quiz hall is buko pandan. “ At which point, we buy the comically large cup of gulaman for 35 usd.  Anyways, at one point, my dead grandfather participates in the quiz bee, but ducks out before it started and it delayed, and he ran away. I met the girl who is going to be my grandfather’s group’s opponent. And she’s crying because she was so excited for this, and this is like a plot point, an arc for her character is she was like an anime character, this would be the final arc, the arc right before she acheivs her dreams. And I was like “Oh balls, I need to find my gramps.” 

And I find him in my grandmother’s house, my childhood home, and he was kinda looking at a picture. Idk what the pic was, but if there’s anything I know about the pics in my grandma’s house is that it’s all family. Pics of me, my brother, their anniversary, the pics of their wedding and the weddings of all their kids. So....  And I was like “Grandpa’s come on, you gotta compete!” and he kinda looks at me solemny and I realize he’s delaying the inevitable. And he says goodbye, and he vanishes. And when I come back to the quizhall, they crying girl, who is an elf btw, says she won, because the other team is disqualified, and she is still crying.  then there is a part where hiccup and astrid are exploring, and they find a hand, and they give it to me, and I was like “WHAT ON FUCKING EARTH-” and they were like, bring it back to life. and I was like sure. And I brought it back into like, egg form. And now hiccup and astrid has like a mx-breed dragon child. Part httyd dragon, Part Bakunawa (Filipino ) dragon. 

And then I was back in school, the quizbee is over and we are doing P.E and coach is testing our powers, “kick that ball as hard as you can.” And I did, and it kinda looked like it didnt go far, “I thought you had more in you.” Coach said, and I was like, Yeah me too, I had a power up and all. Then my classmate says, that’s not my ball, that’s his. And I was like, where the fuck’s mine? And apparently it traveled the world.  Then there was a part where my classmates took me to the study hall and we studied and the chairs floated. that was cool. 

[wormmomma]

MIDSOMMAR SPOILER REVIEW: this movie fucking broke me

CW:RAPE, ABUSE, PEDOPHILLIA

“Midsommar” is a grimm fairytale of sorts. A fairly different homage to the cult film the “wicker man”. “The wicker man” is about a european cult being investigated by a british christian cop, “midsommar” avoids the christian indictment of pagan/occult religious practices. midsommar attempts to be an out and out horror film unlike the a genre bending murder mystery/horror/thriller roots of “The wicker man”. Director ari aster obviously wanted to add to the annals of folk horror by creating an ambitious beautifully horrific and sometimes downright psychedelic film. Ari aster wanted to make a film where you can’t hide from the horror as it all happens in front of you. It's also a breakup movie for some reason? As someone who has seen the theatrical cut twice and the director's cut once I can assure you it misses the mark when taking both concepts. If you're wondering  whether not to watch the film i think that on a technical level “midsommar” is beautiful and has amazing cinematography, but the answer is yes, but no. Jordan Peele was shown an advance copy of the film and told Aster "I think you’ve made the most idyllic horror film of all time" that high praise. But that  being said for personal reasons this will be my final time seeing the film. I think the director's cut is a gorgeous and amazing three hour film. But as someone personally affected by rape, pedophillia, and the victimization mentally or physically handicapped people i cant reccomend this film wholeheartedly. I'm far from squeamish and love films that revel in shock, horror and extremity but I cannot in good conscious recommend a film I almost walked out on. I think Ari Aster has backpedaled immensely in his ability to create horror that exhibits empathy for his characters and the triumphs and tragedies that he subjects them too. “Hereditary” had an amount of emotional pathos for its characters that was almost completely removed from “Midsomer”. The fim feels unreasonably cruel even for a horror movie. Although enjoyable, proceed with caution “Midsommar” is a beautiful, slow, horrific but ultimately controversial mess of a film. 8/10

 (the rest of this review is a plot synopsis and a meditation on the more controversial passages in the movie and is to be read for those who have actually seen midsommar. Spoilers abound!) 

So what’s it  about? 

Midsommar is about Dani, an anxious and vulnerable young woman dating an emotionally abusive and reserved boyfriend named christian. After her bipolar sister commits suicide and murders both there parents, Dani goes on a european excursion with cristian with his anthropologist friends as they study a swedish cults midsommar summer solstice tradition. Dani reeling not only from having her parents taken from her by their favorite child, but also from the lack of any real emotional support goes on a gorgeous, psychedelia, induced nightmare of the cult horror variety. Immediately after touching down on the swedish cult's beautiful grassy commune christian manipulates dani into taking psychedelics. Christian although quite emotionally stunted and quite meek at his core is very sly and amazing at working people. Watching Christian make Dani do psychedelic drugs (mushrooms i believe) to make her clear refusal to take them into something that not only affects christian but also his friends and everyone around them is almost scary in its hilariously methodical toxicity. This leads to dani having a panic attack and from there the hits just keep on coming. Dani then has to watch as two cultist commit ritual suicide. This traumatic incident further escalated when one jumped off the mountain on his leg and needed to have his head crushed by cult members till it turns to meat and dust. To make a long three hour story with icelandic pacing short lets race to the finish line:

Christian begins to be pursued by a cult member named maja. Dani still reeling from seeing two people commit suicide has her worries invalidated by christian and all of his anthropologist bros. The anthropology bro argues about who deserves to break basically every rule of basic anthropology as they try to see who gets PAID for perverting a culture they were invited to study not disturb. Christian eats one of majas pubes. After pissing on a ceremonial tree for the dead, and taking photos of the forbidden religious text (written by an inbred autistic oracle boy) our two american secondary characters are chopped off. Dani and christian are the final outsiders left standing. Dani joins a dance competition (yes really) and becomes this year's may queen. forever to be immortalized in the annals of white female faces shown in portraits plastered in the sleeping quarters of this matriarchal cult commune. Christian is then raped as we discover how all the bodies of our other character are disposed of. Dani, inebriated and vulnerable, discovers christian being raped by the cult and forced to sleep with the 16 year old maja. Disgusted dani vomits and syncs her cries of pain with the cult sister and finally has her trauma validated. She is given the choice to then murder christian as hes trapped in a paralyzed state. Dani decides to burn christian alive in the body of a bear, finally defeating and overcoming her emotional abuser. Dani smiles as the cult writhes in pain from the death of the cult members burning alive with christian.Dani is happy. She has family. She is home.

So lets (finally) talk about maja

“Look at it from an academic perspective it would provide a unique glimpse into our sexual rights.”

“Can i not have a unique glimpse without participating?”

This is a conversation that is awkwardly cut from the theatrical version of midsommar. Christian is being offered to have sex with maja. Maja is a sixteen year old girl. The closest aster ever comes to revealing this fact is offhandedly mentioning maja having her first period. Christian refuses sex and is raped by maja, and the cult while a fourteen year old disabled child watches. There's a lot wrong with this scene. I’ll be honest for personal reasons I was really disgusted by this scene. I feel like im projecting but rape and pedophellia are really delicate topics and should be treated sensitivity. Ive seen alot of extreme very difficult horror films, i've seen rape, pedophillia, and violence explored in meaningful interesting and empathetic ways even ari asters own work like “meet the johnsons”. But watching maja rape christian with what i would assume are her older siblings, aunts, grandmothers, mother and other cult members as a 14 year old boy watches just made me feel fucking dirty. The weird part: it isn't horrific. While cristian was being raped, the audience I was watching it with were laughing. It wasn't scary. it was funny. It's a cognitive dissonance. The audience isn't aware of christians being raped or majas age. Most people assume he's cheating and deserves to be burned alive by dani. Making christian the bad guy of his own a rape is horrific but i shouldn’t need to hunt down that information and watch the film three times to understand that. It makes the movie feel as if its really bad at relaying basic information, at worst it's dishonestly hiding it to make the film more palatable. After putting all the pieces together I was disgusted. Ari aster crossed a line. I felt queasy and never wanted to see this film ever again. The fact ari aster could have made maja of age, or take the disabled 14 year old out the scene entirely, or not have had christian be raped in the first place while reaching a more understandable and tragic ending annoys me to know end, it feel like i watched these characters be used and mistreated for no reason. Just to shock me. It lacks value, it’s  gross and uninteresting. much like christian and everyone involved i feel violated and it's really hard for me to enjoy watching what is an otherwise (although flawed) very interesting and compelling work or art. I’m  still morbidly curious of the next film ari aster makes but i really hope he learns for this mistake and doesn't objectify children in another weird fetishistic male rape comedy routine. It just leaves me confused, disgusted and only makes it more challenging to analyze the more interesting implications of the film. I really appreciated hereditary as someone who has a very emotionally abusive family and has a very hard time processing death. I found hereditary horrific as it is cathartic. As someone who had to quite recently confront a pedophile, midsommar just left me hurt, and trapped. I was reliving some of the worst parts of my trauma as an audience sits around and laughs at it. It all felt so tragic and meaningless. I want to actually give ari asters work an honest critique but he's produced the only work of film that really hurt me and left me feeling violated. I really love his work and I know I'm exaggerating but I hope art never has such a negative effect on my mental health or anyone else’s ever again. I don't blame Maja or christian or the actor who portrayed them. I respect their performances although I have zero respect for how utterly tasteless midsommar ended up being for me. I think I need to learn how not to take art so seriously and try not to invest myself in other people's work. It's a difficult habit to kick. Needless to say, I cannot recommend this movie. If you're able to separate art from the artist and read this whole review without watching the film you're not a bad person for watching it, midsommar is a compelling, difficult experience.

I hope you enjoyed this review and I'm sorry if it got wayyy too personal in the end there. The movie clearly struck a raw nerve for me. if you enjoy this or any review  i've dones let me know. I may reveiw hereditary in the future.if your also having issues with death, rape, abuse or mental health i hope this review didnt make it worse. Everyone is deserving of love, family, community and I hope everyone can find that. Have a good day, and have a safe quarantine.   

[irnwithdiego]

omg pls rant abt Lila i also have.. a lot of issues with her and how ppl have reacted to her character

okay well first and foremost: i Love ritu. i absolutely adore that woman and im so happy that she's finally getting the attention she deserves, i support her and david dating too - so my opinions are genuinely not based on anything to do with that. just bc ive been accused of that by people who didnt realize ive been rooting for them since last summer lol.

anyway.

my biggest issue with lila is the fact that she was introduced as a chameleon. as brilliant or clinically insane as the situation requires. unpredictable. to me that sounded so incredibly interesting, because right from the bat i knew she was gonna turn out as the bad guy, or at least one of them and i was HOPING she would. i was really hoping she would be going batshit crazy on them, doing her thing as the evil person, then when s2 came along she got revealed to be the handler's daughter which to me made it even more exciting? because thats potential to get REAL crazy.

in the end, what we got was half-assed and incoherent and neither here nor there. we didnt get a chameleon, we got a mirror. lol. i expected her to be able to adjust to situations and people perfectly, charming them maybe, yknow. chameleon stuff. (would've loved it if she for example looked different to everyone and nobody actually knows what she looks like, alas. that would've been too creative i suppose)

and yeah her humor was "twisted" in a way, and she was charming... in a way. not to me, not to five, and i think the fact diego fell for her is really just him latching onto another problem/person/situation he needs to fix. the guy with the biggest trust issues on the show, openly telling her he prefers to know what people are even lying about, trying to cut her off multiple times the entire season, getting kidnapped and drugged by her to be shown off and introduced as "boyfriend" (??), turns out to be in love with her. okay. makes little to no sense, but i suppose you could partially blame it on her ability to be unpredictable and a chameleon (i still dont even know what they meant by that, where is the logic in calling her that-)

her undressing diego down to his underwear was creepy as hell to me, she knew exactly he’s only been stabbed and there was nothing else. she patches him up and climbs in bed with him as if they’ve known each other for ages. diego seems a bit "eh" at first, then just decides to fuck her. alright. a) diego, the guy with the biggest trust issues- b) i could see it as a letting off some steam thing tbh, just destressing or whatever. but he still had the stab wound that he allegedly almost bled out/died from so..... lmao. makes sense. in the end it wasnt just a quickie, it was ~love~ and that just doesnt sit right with me.

she lies to him from the get go, she manipulates his every move, she's invasive as all hell, she cant take a no in most situations, but sure. its love. sounds healthy.

the whole clusterfuck about their weird asylum relationship got completely drowned out by her "trying not to fall for diego", which essentially just made her character seem to be all over the place. she seems unfinished, like they disnt really know what to do with her, started off strong and then went off track and couldnt get back on. it seems like they changed a lot of things last minute and i cant make sense of her actions, especially not the way they wanted me to. its clear they were trying to keep up this guessing game about whether she would turn good for diego and his siblings or betray him. it was executed so poorly though, it just feels incredibly incoherent. she contradicts herself more often than not, and fine, lets say they wanted her to look confused about her situation and everything - it was still executed so poorly idk how else to put it. she was neither crazy enough for me to believe the character sheet we got beforehand, nor was she innocent enough for me to believe she really wanted to join them.

she literally tries to KILL all of diego's siblings and him in the end. she only seems to be considering joining them very last minute, like minutes before diego's little speech she was about to erase the entire hargreeves family. and she looked like she was having fun doing it too lmao. just doesnt sit right with me at all. diego proclaiming he loves her after all THAT doesnt sit right with me at all. like what, he tries to get away from her pretty much all season but decides she's worth it only after she tries to kill his family? diego??? im- come on.

i appreciate the thought of a redemption arc, but she wasnt nearly evil enough for me to even believe her original intentions, so i dont really know what her redemption would even look like.

and last but not least - the chameleon vs mirror thing. :) bro. that annoyed me so much. she essentially just goes and god-modes the entire season within 10 minutes, to say it with the words of a friend. like what was the point of that? the logic? how did they even know she could do that, if they allegedly dont know where the other kids with powers are? who did she train her powers on? plus, this is the oldest trope in the history of sci-fi/fantasy stories. someone turns out to be able to copy/mirror back the great powers of somebody else and overthrows everything. yawn.

what makes the others special if she can do whatever they do. maybe its just me being nit-picky at this point but i really dont want it. its so boring.

i had such high hopes for lila, i seriously was so excited to see her and it Still feels like such a let down just thinking of how s2 turned out. dont even get me started on all of them NEEDING a love interest apparently. because you cant be happy without one. thanks, but no thanks.

"s2 is gonna focus on the siblings' relationships!!" my ass. lila and diego's ~bond~ was as unnecessary and illogical as klaus' powers suddenly tenfolding and his paranoia of the spirits just lowkey vanishing with no real explanation other than "he's sober now ❤"

so yeah, all in all lila just seems the least fleshed out, randomnly thrown together and a Bit forced on the romantic part. i would've preferred her just being the big bad and going mental in the end. that would've been an interesting character choice for her.

from the bottom of my heart: why not.

sorry if this is too long, i couldnt help digressing here and there.

[clumsyclifford]

i have followed your advice and listened to what well isn't exactly happy but at least upbeat music yesterday and for a bit it picked up my mood so thank you for putting that idea in my head and also for sending love ❤

i believe in you and your tea obsession too i'm sure you can still manage 73 cups

KHSKDMSLDKXJD sure love i'll just hack your webcam i mean seeing you sounds better than seeing kiernan shipka anyway

love that for you, you deserve nice days 💕 hope you managed some work over the weekend. ooh alright noted i'll refrain from asking about your cl*sses again it is very understandable to not want to talk about them. i have the same thing when someone asks me about my bachelor thesis so yeah i get it

thank you for indulging me i like planning hypothetical weddings or just generally planning things though i too really don't want an actual one. ooh i remember we talked about this a little before and you had a very pretty red dress in mind. so i guess a fitting colour scheme for everything would be red and white with maybe black accentuations. i would like to wear either sth like lisa gaskarth's wedding dress or sth resembling alex' suit (i was already in love with her dress but then i watched their wedding video and now i can't chose between both their outfits bc i love them) early fall is perfect it's the best season (with spring but less bugs so literally perfect) helen's gotta play some kind of important part bc i found your blog bc of her and also just bc she's helen. a tea station. bella Your Mind. this is why we're getting married. oh and i would like to have tulips somewhere please. i can't wait to see your 20 sth weddings truly love that for you 🙈

reasonable answer about the hand/nose kisses however have you considered the cuteness of someone peppering kisses over their significant others face and in that nose kisses being included. for example imagine let's say lashton in the morning. ashton is up bc i imagine him to be the weird kind of person that wakes up early just because and he decides to be a bother and startes just randomly kissing luke wherever he can to wake him up and then luke grumpily wakes up and demands proper kisses and to continue to be a little teasing bitch ashton refuses to kiss him on the mouth at first and instead kisses his nose. it is cute in my head. though hand kisses are unmatched actually so i don't even know why i'm arguing for the nose kisses. also i'm fairly sure i must have read this concept in some fic and am plagiarising it my sincerest apologies i did not mean to copy whoever wrote sth like this before. god my brain is weird af today i'm gonna go to sleep. good night, love you very much and hope you're well 💕 -fiancee

oh nice!!!!! i’m glad it worked for a little bit at least. what songs did you listen to i’m curious to know

dfkjgdfmj thank you tbh i’m not doing super well i have days with no tea but then i have like four cups in a day so like? i have no idea. also though, i just realized we are more than halfway through this month?? how the fuck?? is that possible??? jesus christ didnt february JUST start. what is going on

fgkgjkdfj okay cool deal, you don’t ask about my classes and i won’t ask about your thesis

!!!!!!! omg okay yes i STRONGLY support these fashion choices also dgfkhljdlmj OF COURSE helen has to be an essential part you’re so right alright well @calumcest no pressure but what role would you like in my and fiancee’s wedding, weigh in <3 as for tulips i am ABSOLUTELY down they are super pretty this is so CUTE!!!! fiancee i love this wedding so much on vibes alone i cant wait for it to not happen

mmmmmm but that’s not nose kisses then, that’s just. kisses. thats just general kisses. also that sounds like a prompt from one of those lists and also vaguely familiar but tbh maybe it’s just a General Brand of Fluff don’t worry about it ldkfjgkdfj (not to be like you’re probably thinking of one of my fics but that made me think of the disconnected one so? maybe that??)

anyway! i am well! thank you! love you <3