#and i can guarantee he wouldn't give a shit about her making more money than him

[brightyearning]

sorry but anyone who wanted Ted and Rebecca to get together, as if they weren't giving step siblings the entire series, is batshit crazy

[godfrey-the-chaos-duck]

this just in: Irish loser is Sad™ because all my friends can go and do shit but not me apparently

Vent under the cut, I'm really sorry about this but I have to get it off my chest (it's nothing too serious but it is kinda long)

I'm eighteen. I've voted twice. I've finished secondary school. People my age are planning holidays and going to college and moving out and actually living life, and I feel like I'm falling behind so so much.

I don't have a bank account. I don't have a passport or any form of photo ID with a date of birth. I don't even have (or want!) a driver's licence, I will circle back to that later though.

My parents (particularly my mom) keep saying they'll help me get set up with all the above but because Mom's busy with work and Dad's really forgetful, it never gets done.

It's gotten to a point where I don't actually see a point in getting these things set up, for the following reasons:

I haven't had my name legally changed yet so everything would be set up under my deadname. Which. Fuck that.

For a bank account to make sense I would need money and I live in literally the textbook definition of "rural ass farming town" so the only jobs around that don't need experience are working in the supermarket or food service. I would, and I'm not exaggerating here, rather launch myself into a black hole than do those jobs because I've heard from my neurotypical peers how hard they are so I can only imagine how awful it would be for someone with autism like myself. My only other option is to try and get unemployment benefits but like. What would I even be spending the money on? Certainly not a house (the housing market in Ireland is literally impossible) and not a holiday either.

For a passport to make sense I would need to be able to travel, and quite aside from the No Money thing (see above) I've been fucked over by fate yet again because Mom doesn't trust me to go places on my own. She's only quite recently started letting me take the bus to a town half an hour away with friends. I don't even see the use in asking her to go on a train/plane/ferry unaccompanied because I know for a fact she'd say no. She'd say something along the lines of "we should do this together a few times first" which, understandable, but then she's so tired from work and busy with housework on the weekends that that never ends up coming to fruition. Add to that my crippling anxiety, catastrophic thinking and fear of the unknown, and I have basically conditioned myself into thinking I can never go anywhere more than a half hour's drive away without a parent.

I do not want to learn to drive. My dad keeps telling me I should because it would give me freedom, except no it wouldn't. It's not like I could use his car because he needs to go places too, and I could probably never afford my own car cause that shit is expensive as hell to run and maintain, so I really see no sense in learning. Also, I have the navigational skills of a teaspoon, so I would be basically guaranteed to get lost.

All of this has come to a point where I'm super hesitant to ask for anything because I know that either my parents will outright say no, or I'll end up chickening out because they'll remind me there's probably something I haven't thought of. (Mind, they don't often fully explain what)

And this was fine a few years ago when I had no friends and couldn't see how people actually lived their lives, but as my friends are all telling me about things they plan to do, I guess I'm having a lot of realisations.

The first time a classmate of mine said she was going on a holiday independently with some friends of hers, my first immediate thought was, "Do her parents just not care?" This would've been a little over two years ago, when I and all my class were around 16.

Now, though, I'm realising that teens going places on their own is actually NORMAL and that, big surprise, I'm once again the weird one. I told Mom about this and her response was "there's no right speed to do life at" which is right, you shouldn't do things if you don't feel ready to do them, but I don't know, something about this whole situation feels kinda wrong to me.

Here's the thing that's made me emotional today though.

The big Pride festival in Ireland is on June 29th. I wanted to go last year with my friends but Mom said no because it would be "too crowded" and "what if something goes wrong and I can't be there for you" and all that. And the worst part? She's right. It would have been very overwhelming.

Anyway this year, my friends aren't going, so even if by some miracle Mom's answer was going to change, I would feel awkward not being able to go with anyone I knew. So I'm not even gonna ask.

The way I see it, I can't move on with my life in any way as it stands. I can't release music, or publish books, or sign up to act in anything, until I get my name changed, because I do not want to be renowned under my deadname.

But I also feel like I can't change my name until I move out. My parents say they need to know where I am all the time, to the point where I once had an outing with a group of friends interrupted by a call from my father because I had left with the group from the coffee shop he'd dropped me off at, to a different shop somewhere else, two minutes' walk away.

I don't know. I feel like I have no freedom or independence and I'm genuinely unsure whether this is normal for people my age, or if it's an autism thing, or if my parents (again, particularly my mother) are being weird.

Basically what I'm wondering is

Is it healthy to be in this situation? And if not, how can I get out of it?

Again, I'm really really sorry about this, I know I don't usually get all personal on here but just. I feel weird about this and need some advice or at the very least a virtual shoulder to cry on

[dutchannanas]

Episode 9 Raaaaaap:Publiiiiiiiiiic

I'm pretty nervous for this episode, haha

Oh boy, deathmatch... 2,5 HOURS? Damnnnnn

give me those wholesome moments! i need them now even if they contain sponsorship! Haha ahw Zene English class~

I'd rather jump off a bridge than see Block 2 and 6 get eliminated. Those two are going to hurt me the most :(

Osun looks like he is about to cry and Kaogaii's energy is straight up gone.

Sometimes humans are the worst but sometimes humans are the best. They have each other and together they brought back the good vibes!

Ahw Loopy :( they are all good kids. I'm getting too attached to Block 2...

oh god here we go

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

집에 가지마 집에 가지마 집에 가지마 집에 가지마 BABY~

That was lit. no, no no, I don't want anyone to go home from Block 6 T^T

Ah Block 5 did well. Shame that Owen fucked up the intro. It is what it is.

Looks like Loopy won't be performing...

THEY ARE FUCKING AWESOME! I WANT TO GIVE ALL OF THEM (with their consent) FOREHEADKISSES !!! Xwally, ShyboiiTobii and Khan were fucking insane, holy shit.

I'm so scared for the results, I can't watch this but I have to.

OH. Oh my god congrats Block 6. Oh jeez. I'm not made for this, just spit it out already! I'm holding my own hands so tight! THANK GOD! BLOCK 2! YES! OH MY! *exhaaaaaaale*

rip Block 5...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm going to take a break, this is too sad.

Well fuck, I spoke too soon. I can't hold anyone's hand or pet on the back. My care instincts are triggered.

Alright, we're now shifting the conversation to Block formation. I'm glad because seeing people cry makes my heart feel heavy. Anyway, I wouldn't be surprised if Since joined Block 3 if she got the chance. Survival is her priority. aaaaand she did.

Kaogaii did his best but Block 6 is still solid imo.

ShyboiiTobii is now the leader of Block 2. Khan, you did well^^

Haon became leader of Block 3 again and Boi B became leader of Block 4 again. What will happen to Block 5? Three people is too little, I think they'll have to move? Sticking together is a bold move.

So Hash Swan to Block 6 and JP + Osun to Block 2? I don't know what use the Block Money has but it would be convenient if JP and Osun bring more block money with them, especially considering Block 2 doesn't want to recruit more rappers.

Why not Hash and 10K to Block 6 and JP + Osun with 20K to Block 2? The situation isn't ideal but this seems most logical to me. Wait??? Is dividing money not an option? It can only go to one Block? What a stupid rule :/ the rule isn't explicitly stated but that would explain why nobody is able to move.

OH MCKDADDY YOU GENIUS. Splitting the money through Beef Challenge! How does that work? There are a lot of rules, we'll just see lol. It's going too fast for me but if everything goes according to plan, they'll divide the money just like i've said earlier. Hash joined Block 6. JP, Osun and 30K won moved to Block 2.

Beef Challenge let's goooo even though it was all planned out, no spontaneous beef, no drama, just finances. "Ayo foggy get your ass up!" - JOONIE. Adorable!!!

Haon is fascinated by this strategy. I get it, it's genius!

Kaogaii is right, Block 3 is greedy! They already have Since and they still want more?!

It seems like the deal is safe.

Money Swan XD

Now that this is done, it's a shame that the Beef Challenge wasn't really used but everyone followed the rules, so whatever.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wait wait wait. So the final Blocks are 1, 2, 3, 4 and 6. No changing Blocks, no recruitment, no leader survival guarantee.

Block match 4 is called "Kill Them All"

CHILL / PAUSE / HOLD ON

Infinite Cypher but with time limit?

Oh... they have to bet with the block money. Rapper with most votes gets all the money. And top 3 blocks survive?

FINALLY JAY PARK

Why is he only now being used in the show? XD

Alright, all 5 Blocks are introduced.

Kaogaii please do not take off your pants. You're married!

Round 1, every leader put down 1K block money on the table. The beat is starting but why is almost everyone walking on stage? I'm confused. OH. If you want to rap on the beat, you have to go on stage... Drain K is right, with so many people this is going to take a while...

Oh~ Haon goes first! DAMN that was fire! Fantastic start!

The editors are cutting a lot, understandable or else this would take forever so I'll keep my mouth shut.

Wow the cypher is over. did EVERYONE rap? it went by so fast! everyone was so cool! this time it is impossible to tell who's going to win! Okay damn Geegooin. I think Osun got pretty close.

Round 2 Oh dang, that is a lot of rappers. JTong starts! I like his lyrics! 84 votes?? Oh dear! That'll be hard to beat. Wow, Joonie made a lot of improvement! Oh, she only got 12 votes... I'd vote for her! Altough, I'd probably give every rapper my vote...

Roh Yunha won with a 1 vote difference. As soon as he started up hype up the audience, I was like "You punk!". And then he killed it like usual.

Next episode more rounds and hidden matches and Crew Battle. I guess another really long episode...

Aight, see you all next time!

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hellos team anon here!

So I'm never home on the weekends because I'm off seeing my father.. and even if I've bitten off more than I can chew it shouldn't be more than I can chew

I'm too childish for a highschooler and I need to stop being a kid and I know it's just my trauma and developmental issues that's caused that but I need to grow up now and actually learn to be teenager if that makes sense?

I feel like I just need to figure out how to chew it rather than chew less

I kinda wish I didn't have to see my dad on the weekends because then I'd actually have time to do things and I also wish I actually had friends or just wish I didn't know myself super well because that kinda thing seems to scare people off

We had our first Saturday rehearsal recently though and I was super happy about that

This is a little messy but it's midnight and I should really go to sleep, the weekends are really starting to boost my phone usage and it's annoying me like a month ago my daily average was between 2 and 3 hours but the weekends have been slowly boosting it to 5 - 7 and on the weekends I'm on it all day

My mother currently believes I'm going to be one of those failure to launch people because to her I'm not doing enough but I also agree that I'm not doing enough

But I don't think I'd be a failure to launch because I'm not doing enough but because since I was born I was constantly in a traumatic situation until highschool so I don't know

I don't think I could ever manage being an adult

We don't have any money I don't have many friends and a lot of them aren't great friendships either

I want to leave the house and go outside because I like the outside but that's how they'll find me

So I can't do outside

I love too far from any friends that I kinda have

I'm a techie so I can't be friends with the actors by law almost and then my agoraphobia won't let me approach the few actors I think are really cool and want to talk to because they always have other actors around them

I've never done well in school and now I suddenly need to and I cant

I can't go to uni because it's too much money so I can't give myself another year

I'm younger than all my peers by a year and the schools wouldn't let my mother hold me back when I was struggling

Last time I did well in school was 3rd grade

This is now more so me complaining that anything

I'm not reading through this I'm just sending cause it's time to get ready for another week of no sleep and since rehearsal is now a thing guaranteed meal times unlike anytime else and also guaranteed social time because I'm a extrovert I just struggle sometimes because of situations I've been put through so I don't have to wait alone after school for hours anymore until the show is over but I'm looking at trying to take an ASM role next semester so I have more rehearsals I get to go to

Hopefully I can become friends with the one actor that I really want to become friends with [he has a lot of friends but I try] and maybe with some of the others too

This is a complete mess lol

Hi!

Honestly, it sounds like you're being super hard on yourself. Yes, you need to find strategies to succeed, but shitting on yourself isn't going to help anyone, you know? You clearly care, and that's a huge part of the problem for some people.

Have you tried reaching out to a teacher and seeing if they have suggestions for strategies? Honestly, it sucks so much that schools don't teach you HOW to school. Maybe a trusted teacher can help with that?

[useless-bi-otch]

Cookies'n Cream - Chapter 13

Last chapter / MasterList / art by @aneenasevla

Chapter 13 - Camellias and Chocolate

"C'mon, Okubo, stop with that nonsense…," Himuro mutters, raising his voice to be heard from the living room, while Kaneda prepares the coffee table to receive the snacks and a bored Rihito looks for anything good in the Netflix catalog. "It's as if you're trying to ask our opinion on a dress for the prom..."

"Shut up, Himuro!," They hear Okubo scream, the sound coming out muffled through the locked door. "When I called you to spend the Saturday night at my apartment, it was to help me, not to annoy me!"

"I thought it was to make up for lost time and solidify our bonds of friendship through snacks, alcohol and a 'manly movie'," Kaneda underlines the last words by forming quotation marks with his fingers, placing the bowl full of salted peanuts on top of the coffe table. "At least that was what you said in the group chat..."

“It was all excuses, can't you see? We were deceived, misled, cheated, whatever you call it," Rihito grumbles in an eye roll. "Now we're all trapped in the rom-com limbo. Soon we'll be painting each other's nails, plucking out our eyebrows, making a list of the cutest boys in school and syncing our menstrual cycles."

"You shut up too, Rihito! Now give me your honest opinions...," They hear the bedroom door open, and soon Okubo appears, coming out of the corridor, carrying a bouquet of flowers in each hand. He shows them to his friends, anxious. "Which of these two is the best? Roses or camellias?"

Rihito, Himuro and Kaneda can only stare at him, exasperated. They knew how determined their friend was to regain Tomori's trust, after doing wrong by her. They knew and were willing to help him, their spirits being renewed after Okubo and Rihito had made up and the four of them were again hanging out together. But holy shit, how did he expect them to help him if he wasn't helping himself?

"... Aargh, don't look at me like that! You'll make me feel even more torn!," Okubo flinches before their unimpressed looks. "Just answer me, which one is the best?"

"The best would've been if you hadn't wasted your money. Flowers, Okubo? Are you serious?," Himuro snorts impatiently as he brings a tray with a bottle of sake and four glasses. "Don't you think it's still too soon to start bribering the girl?"

"It's not bribery, damn it! These are guarantees, my guy. Guarantees that I want to be better and that she is the one who motivated me to do so," He declares, raising the bouquet of camellias in the air. "What better way to symbolize this than a bouquet? You've never heard of the language of flowers, have you?"

"Sorry, but I only speak Japanese and a little English. ‘Fagish’ is not in my dictionary," Lihito snorts, dodging when Okubo tries to hit the back of his neck with his foot. Kaneda just shakes his head.

"I've heard about it, but in this case, there is no subtlety in the messages. Roses and camellias? And both red? You wouldn't be more obvious even if you wrote a haiku on a little note and put it inside one of the bouquets..."

"I thought about doing that, but I flunked in Literature during highschool. I'd only embarrass myself if I tried," He confesses nervously, and that brings out a chorus of frustrated groans from the others.

"You're already embarrassing yourself, damn it! Seriously, Okubo, flower bouquets are so fucking cliché," Rihito gestures with the remote control, and Himuro nods.

"Yep. If you are so keen on giving her a gift, you could at least try to be more original."

"More original, you say?," He puts a hand under his chin, bouquet and all, seeming to have grown a very flowery beard. "I already got something like that, but I don't know if it's good enough..."

"You do? What a prepared little boy you are," Rihito jokes. "Show us what you got then. And get a vase for those flowers, otherwise they'll wilt before Miss Uta even lays her eyes on them."

"Alright. Gimme one sec!," Okubo leaves the bouquets on the sofa and runs down the hall, returning to his bedroom. The three of them wait until they hear the door close before turning their attention to the bouquets, grimacing.

"Seriously, how much did he spend on these things?," Rihito wonders, and Himuro and Kaneda pick up a bouquet each, inspecting them.

“There must be a price tag somewhere… fucking hell!," Himuro hisses suddenly, dropping the bouquet as if it were covered in ants. "I found the tag, but I wish I hadn't…"

"Oh, for the love of...! Where did he buy these flowers?," Kaneda wonders, a bit astonished, when he also finds a price tag. "I've seen flower shops that make arrangements like this for a quarter of that price. Maybe not with that quality, but still..."

"Seriously, I know that money is not a problem for him, but this is getting ridiculous," Rihito makes a face at the flowers. "Miss Uta might think he's trying to buy her forgiveness or something. Then all his efforts will go down the drain..."

"Yeah, but try telling him that. If Mr. Big Mouth didn't turn this into a mega production, we could send him to the bughouse 'cause he'd be insane...," Himuro comments, to which Rihito laughs and Kaneda puts a finger on his lips, hissing.

"Shh! He will hear you! Is everything okay there, Okubo?," He looks over his shoulder, raising his voice a little. "Need help finding anything?"

"No, Kaneda, it's fine!," They hear him reply. "I already found what I was looking for. But..."

"But what?"

“I don't know… what I have here falls into the 'original' category, but maybe it's too original…,” He sounded indecisive, to which Rihito snorted.

"Anything's better than flowers, man. Just show us what you have there, c'mon!"

"Alright then...," They hear the bedroom door open again, and it doesn't take long before Okubo appears, coming from the hallway, carrying what looks like a pile of folded clothes. He places the pile on the marble kitchen counter, picking up the top shirt and unfolding it, showing it to his friends and asking, "Do you think this is good enough? Be real."

There's a silence of about five seconds before Rihito stammers, sounding a little horrified, “I take what I said back. Flowers are so much better than this."

"Oh, fuck you! It's not that bad!," Okubo exclaims indignantly, shaking the shirt a little, his own face in black and white scale printed on it, "It's from the exclusive Ultimate Fight fashion line, and they're hella pricey if you buy 'em at licensed stores! I'm giving it to her for free!"

“I don't even know if it would be worth getting something like this for free,” Kaneda moans while Himuro stares at him and Rihito, frowning.

"And you say I'm the narcissist..."

"You guys are such assholes!," Okubo grunts while folding the shirt carelessly, putting it back on top of the pile. "Anyone can give clothes as gifts, but who else besides me can give clothes from their own licensed line, huh? You want more originality than that? And I hand picked them, they're just the right size for her."

"Wait, how do you know her size?," Kaneda frowns, and Okubo looks to the side, looking suddenly conscious of himself.

"Uh… I don't know, I kinda deduced it from seeing the types of clothes she wears. She's small, has curves and a waist that I can hold in my hands, like this...," He illustrates the gesture by drawing curvilinear shapes in the air with his hands, very concentrated. "And she has nice-sized tits too, I've seen it by her cleavage, so I just looked for the sizes that matched my memories and... stop looking at me like that!," He shouts, blushing hard. "I'm a gentleman but I'm not blind!"

"Okay, whatever. It doesn't change the fact that this gift doesn't cut it," Himuro gestures to the pile of shirts. "First of all, it smells of self-centeredness."

"Oh, go take a look in the mirror, gigolo!"

"I look at myself in the mirror every day and I really like what I see. Guess you don't know the feeling."

"You're not going to like it after I bust that pretty face of yours all over, you man-whore!"

"Alright, alright, calm down, you two," Kaneda places himself between them, sighing as he raises his arms. "Don't take this the wrong way, Okubo, but Himuro is right."

"No, he fucking isn't! I like what I see in the mirror, even if it's a little fucked up-"

"I'm not talking about that! He's right that this gift seems self-centered!," He raises his voice. "If you want to give a gift, you should give her something she likes, not something that immediately refers to you."

"But…," That makes Okubo hesitate, his posture changing from angry to uncertain. "I mean, she- she's a fan of mine, so I thought this would be something she'd like…"

"After what happened that Saturday?," Lihito makes a face. "She might make a ball with those shirts and shove it down your throat, man."

Okubo swallows a little, his right hand automatically going to his neck.

“Do you… do you really think so?”

"I'm completely sure. I spent a few hours with her last Sunday, remember? I got out of there with a bump in my head and everything. Listen to the voice of experience," Rihito warns.

"And that's where my second point comes in," Himuro raises an index finger. "She gave you this second chance to prove that you really care about her and are willing to be better for her. If you give a gift that literally has your face on it, you would be implying that you are more concerned about how it affects you. With how you want her trust just because it benefits you in some way. You'd be pushing your luck, man."

Okubo looks at the pile of shirts on the counter. Then he look at friends. And then he groans loudly, grabbing his head in his hands and going to sink onto the smallest sofa in the living room.

"Damn… what do I do then? I don't know how to please her, I don't know what she likes besides martial arts and confectionery, I...," He raises his head a little, shrugging. "I know almost nothing about her. But I still want to do something, and it's not because I want to get on her good side again... okay, that's partly why, but that's not the only reason!," He assures quickly when he sees the expressions of disbelief from the other three. "I really want to get closer, to know more about her… I want to build something that goes beyond those idol-to-fan interactions, I don't know! I'm tired of playing the badass part whenever I'm around her, man! There's a limit on how many cool lines I can say in a single afternoon and I'm almost out of them!"

"Who knew that Okubo Naoya, Ultimate Fight's biggest chatterbox, has a limit for the dexterity of his tongue?," Himuro jokes, and Kaneda laughs softly.

"Yeah, live and learn, as they say… but seriously, if you really want to get closer with her and you think gifts will help with that, it's better to stick with the flowers. It's cliché, but if you don't know her tastes well, it's also the safest option."

"Yeah… and I still have the box of chocolates I bought for that first date," Okubo smiles, a little more hopeful. "They melted a bit, but they're still good to eat. It's real Swiss chocolate, it would be a waste to let it go bad..."

"Another classic cliché, but still safe," Himuro nods. "Just try to be discreet when giving all this to her, so as not to kill the girl with embarrassment…"

"Embarrassment? Flowers and chocolate are mid stuff next to these monstrosities here!," Lihito laughs as he goes to pick up the shirt at the top of the pile, stretching the fabric with a mocking smile. "What was your plan, man? You wanted to get your head between her tits, even if metaphorically? In that case I don't blame you, hahaha!"

"Fuck you, Rihito! And cut tha out, the store won't give refunds if the shirts got damaged! Seriously, bro, give it back!," Okubo jumps up from the sofa to take the shirt from the Rihito's hands, who runs behind the counter with an idiotic laugh.

Himuro and Kaneda just watch the chase while shacking their heads. As silly and childish as those antics were, it was good to have them being a part of their routines again. Okubo and Rihito were on good terms with each other again and their group was still going strong, as it should be.

* * *

On Monday, just before her lunch break, Tomori sees a small commotion through the kitchen pantry window. A few of the customers had huddled together facing one of the windows, whispering to each other, looking agitated. She even hears a woman giggle.

"Kanny?," She calls, without taking her eyes off the scene. "Take a look at that. What do you think is going on?"

Kanami, who had been showing Koga and Ryuki how to brush the crusts of the croissants with beaten eggs, lifts her head to look over the sous chef's shoulder. She frowns.

"I have no idea. Maybe it's one of those street artists who decided to take advantage of the traffic on our sidewalk," She snorts a little. "If he starts to disturb the customers' meals, I'll go there and fix it..."

"Doesn't seem to be a street artist," Koga also peeks, interested. "For these guys to get all excited like that… hey, maybe Seki and the SJPW crew decide to visit again! Surely they would at least recognize him."

"They'd be a lot more excited if that were the case, I think," Ryuki comments, not taking his eyes off his work with the culinary brush. "And sis, I've brushed twice as many croissants as Koga brushed. I think I won again..."

"Hell no! Gimme that roasting pan, you jerk!"

"Shh!," Kanami and Tomori hiss together, fingers in front of their lips, and Koga shuts up, but not before casting a death glare at Ryuki, who had cupped his hand over his mouth, making a low fart noise. The cooks look out the window again.

"Can you hear what they're whispering?," Tomori asks, to which Kanami shakes her head, giving her a reproachful look afterwards.

“No, and we shouldn't try to. You hang out with Hiro so much, you're picking up his bad habits. Get a grip..."

"You say that, but you're here, hanging from the pantry window with me, trying to listen too."

"Can you hear what they're whispering?," Tomori asks, to which Kanami shakes her head, giving her a reproachful look afterwards.

“No, and we shouldn't try to. You hang out with Hiro so much, you're picking up his bad habits. Get a grip..."

"You say that but you're here, hanging from the pantry window with me and perking your ears.”

"I'm the boss, perking my ears up is a must to ensure the bakery's smooth running!"

"Yeah, sure," Tomori nods sarcastically, leaning out of the window a little and hissing, as low as he can manage, "Hey Hiro! Can you see anything from there?"

"Ooh, does that mean I've become the official scout now?," Hiro arches an eyebrow from the cashier area. "You speak horrors about the gossiper, but when you want quality spy services, then you need him, right?"

"You're the one in the best angle to look out the window! Do us this little favor, in the name of the bakery's smooth running...," Tomori pouts a little.

"Alright, alright. What would be of these women without me...," The cashier rolls his eyes before getting up, stretching his neck while looking at the window where some of the customers were still huddled. "Okay, it's hard to see anything, there are too many big-heads for such a little space..."

"Keep it down, the customers will hear you!," Kanami hisses through her teeth while Tomori smothers a chuckle by putting a fist in front of her mouth. Hiro responds, though, by widening his eyes.

“Oh, Sugar Honey Iced Tea…”

"What? What is it?," Tomori and Kanami lean over the edge of the window, eagerly, and from inside Koga's voice can be heard, warning worriedly, "Careful, you two will end up falling from there..."

"Just when I thought things couldn't get any more ridiculous… okay, Tomori, don't freak out now," Hiro finally turns to them, still wide-eyed. "But you have an illustrious visitor, apparently."

"Visitor...? Wait, is it Mr. Okubo?!," Tomori's eyes widen as well when she realizes the implications in his voice. "But he didn't say he would come by, neither by call nor by text..."

"Are you still allowing him to contact you?," Kanami asks, a little disapproving, to which the sous chef pouts.

"I imposed rules and limited the number of messages and at what time they can be sent… but really, why would he cause all this commotion?," She asks herself in an attempt to disguise her reaction, "He's known in the country, but not as much as Seki..."

"It's not him they're interested in, necessarily," Hiro arches an eyebrow. "It's what he's brought. Get ready to be embarrassed, honey."

"Huh?," Tomori blinks, confused. They hear another chorus of giggles as customers turn their heads, following the trajectory of the person on the other side of the glass, who apparently wanted to have his view of the bakery interior unobstructed by onlookers. She finally sees Okubo, looking very embarrassed, trying to hide something from prying eyes... and Tomori feels her stomach do a somersault at the glimpse of a flower bouquet and what looked like a box of chocolates.

"Oh, my god...!" She claps a hand over her mouth, her face flushing and burning. Kanami's jaw drops.

"You gotta be kidding me... what is that idiot doing?!," She hisses, her voice rising a few octaves. "He doesn't think I'm going to let him into the bakery just for that, does he?"

"Who knows how the trains of thought work in that bald head of his...," Hiro blows a strand of his bangs away from his eyes. "I'd find that extremely cute if the situation were different. But since it's not, it smells of manipulation and blackmail..."

"Manipulation and blackmail by whom?," Koga approaches, placing himself between Tomori and Kanami, after hearing the conversation and not being able to resist his curiosity. He then widens his eyes. "Wait, isn’t that Okubo? And he's carrying flowers? He...," The boy blinks. And then he opens an insinuating smile, turning to Tomori while lowering and raising his eyebrows. "Wow, Miss Uta, look at you! You managed to wrap Ultimate Fight's heavyweight champion around your little finger, eh! This is going to fuckin' break the internet after it goes public-"

"No! I mean... uuugh...," Tomori groans, still very red. "I don't know what's worse, his attitude or the fact that I'm a little moved by the gesture..."

"Well, don't be! Resist, dammit!," Kanami commands imperiously, her green eyes sparking. "You let yourself be carried away by his bravado once and look where it got you!"

"I know, you're right… uugh, stop thinking he's cute, Tomori, stop right now! You idiot!," Tomori hits the sides of her face with her hands, moaning in frustration. Koga blinks again, dumbfounded.

“Uh…did I miss something? Weren't you fancying him too? Or did I get it all wrong?"

"No, honey, you just missed a few essential chapters of the soap opera," Hiro rolls his eyes. "To summarize it, baldy over there asked Tomori out, but he showed up at the date drunk and ruined everything."

"Say what?!," Koga's jaw drops a little. "Are you serious? That guy over there, who was almost as desperate as Rihito to get a girl's attention?"

"You should take that as an example of what not to do," Ryuki comments, still concentrating on brushing the croissants, but his tone had become slightly accusatory. "Anyway, what an idiot. To make Miss Uta sad like that..."

"Fuck off, Ryuki, I'm not that stupid! But damn, now I understand this manipulation and blackmail stuff," Koga peeks out the pantry window again, frowning. "But even though he's an idiot, he never gave me the impression that he was that type of guy. He's nice in general..."

"No! Stop right there, Koga! Don't try to defend him, not after what he did to Tomori!," Kanami points to the boy, who shakes his head quickly.

"I'm not, sis, I swear! He screwed up big time, I agree. But I really don't think he's trying to blackmail her to be forgiven. I've known him for about two years, you know," He scratches the back of his head. "Anyway, if he really wanted to manipulate Miss Uta, he wouldn't be trying to hide like he's doing right now, would he? Bro...," He lets out a mischievous laugh. "It's like I'm back to elementary school, seeing the teacher's favorite student hiding from the girl he has a crush on, hahaha..."

Kanami snorts, not quite convinced. Hiro nods, and Ryuki doesn't even feign interest in the conversation. But Tomori only had eyes for Okubo, who was grinding his teeth, irritated and embarrassed by all the eyes on him. It's then that their eyes meet through the glass, and Tomori feels her stomach do a little somersault again. He, on the other hand, turns even redder, grinning eagerly and waving... and seeming to have forgotten he's holding the bouquet of flowers, which practically flies out of his hand in the excitement of his wave. They hear him give a muffled scream through the glass, running to get the poor flowers, which the customers watching him burst out laughing as if they were watching a live rom-com.

Tomori had to fight back the urge to laugh too, but not for the same mocking reasons the customers did. Jeez… he really wasn't very good with things involving romance, was he? It was so different from the facade of the self-confident badass he'd tried to put on in her presence... and when he stood up with the bouquet in his arms, fussing as he made sure the flowers weren't dirty or squashed, she decided that, once again, she was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Well… as long as he isn't planning to make a public confession to pressure me or anything…," She sighs, and not resisting, returns Okubo's nod, albeit briefly. "He still doesn't have permission to come in, right, Kanny?"

"Yep. He'd need a lot more than romantic gestures and acting like a cute dork to soften me up," Kanami stares at the man on the other side of the glass, her gaze dangerous. Okubo, who had been delighted that Tomori had responded to his wave, flinches as he locks eyes with the baker. She crosses her arms, lifting her chin a little. "What would I give to be able to punch that stupid face again..."

"You punched him, sis?! Damn, I can't believe I missed that!," Koga laments. "Why do these things always happen when Ryuki and I aren't working? This really is like school, where you skip a day and end up missing lots of good shit! Gimme the details, c'mon!"

"We're in the middle of our shift, the most inappropriate time possible to gossip. I heard that giggle there, Hiro, that goes for you too!," Kanami growls over her shoulder. "And you, Mr. Narushima, please get back to work before Ryuki beats his record and consequently you for the third consecutive week," She commands, and Ryuki again makes that muffled fart sound, without turning around. Koga curses under his breath, rushing to grab another cooking brush. She then turns to Tomori, serious. "Anyway, he's still not welcome here. And you? Do you intend to waste another lunch break on him?"

"Well…," She looks out the window again, seeing a flustered Okubo make it all the way to the front door, the tips of his ears red as the customers continue to giggle, enjoying his misery. "I want to at least hear what his explanation will be this time. Call it morbid curiosity if you like..."

"Or maybe it's the hopeless romantic within you, who simply can't resist a sappy gesture," Hiro jokes again. "You haven't been given flowers since college, have you?"

"Me? I haven't been given 'em since highschool." Tomori pouted, blushing a little "Anyway, if this is blackmail or not, I want to find out for myself… and I gave him a chance to prove that he can be better, after all. So... Tomoyo?"

"Yeah?," Tomoyo, who was coming down the narrow corridor of the bakery, returning from her bathroom break, raises her head when she is called. "What is it? Did I take too long on my break? And... what' going on? What they're looking at?," She frowns when she sees the customers whispering to each other. Even though they had sat back down, they continued to lean over in an attempt to peer out the window. Tomori and Kanami sigh in unison.

"Guess what, honey," Hiro rests an elbow on the counter, and then rests his chin on one hand. "Tomori's baldy came back, and this time her brought gifts. Or 'colourful bribes,' if you will."

The waitress rolls her eyes at this, her expression darkening. She looked a lot like Kanami when she got mad like that, Tomori concludes in an internal rush of cuteness.

"Again? Can't this guy get a hint?," She puts a hand on her waist. "Or did you call him here again, Tomori?"

"Not this time," The sous-chef shakes her head. "It's a surprise visit for me too. Still, I want to hear explanations. Can you do me a little favor?"

"Will I get something for it?," She asks, half joking, half serious. Kanami lets out a low laugh.

"Don't look at me. I'm not responsible for transactions made without my imput," She jokes, arching an eyebrow at Tomori. "The cost is all yours.

"A complimentary box of cookies and donuts, how about that?," Tomori puts her hands together, smiling invitingly. And when Tomoyo shrugs, she continues, "Can you go tell him to wait for me near the back door area? He's getting the customers' attention and that affects the movement a little bit-"

"It already did. Everyone's going to be disappointed that there won't be a public love confession. We'll be branded as a cursed establishment, which prevents love stories from coming true."

"Bit your tongue, Hiro!"

"Anyway... can you do that, Tomoyo?," Tomori asks again, to which the waitress rolls her eyes again.

"I will. I just don't understand why you're asking me this. A guy like that doesn't deserve all that consideration from you..."

"Yeah, that's right! Those clueless idiots, screwing dates up left and right!," Koga leans out of the pantry window, smiling agitatedly, and Kanami, who hadn't heard him approaching, jumps. "But not all guys are like that, you know! I, for one, am not-"

"Didn't I just tell you to get back to work, you Goku wannabe? C'mon, don't make me repeat myself!," The baker gives a warning pat on the boy's neck, who lets out a yelp and runs back to Ryuki, a little red at Tomoyo's unimpressed expression. Kanami then huffs, turning to the waitress, "Do what Tomori asked, Tomoyo, please. That fool wouldn't know how to be discreet even if his life depended on it, apparently."

Tomoyo just nods, heading towards the bakery's front door and leaving through it, the bell ringing overhead. Tomori plays with a lock of her hair that has come loose from the net.

"I'm sorry about that, Kanny..."

"Don't be. It's not your fault," Kanami waves a hand, reassuring her. "Well, you already know the procedures. Call me if he starts to be too inconvenient. Or if you see yourself falling for those cheap tactics, because you and I know that these things are your weakness..."

"Don't say it like that. I have a lot more conviction than that, give me some credit," She puffs out her cheeks. "Let's get back to work, then I don't have to think about this until my lunch break."

Kanami nods; the need to concentrate on work so as not to let her mind wander was one she knew well. She returns to Koga and Ryuki, while Tomori goes to take care of the orders that were in the ovens. Hiro just goes back to his assigned spot by the cash register, bored once again.

"Baldy is an idiot, but I'd be lying if I said I'm not envying Tomoh a little..."

* * *

In the alley behind the bakery, while trying to hide from passers-by, Okubo cursed himself in his thoughts. Shit, he hadn't meant to draw attention like that, but it seemed he lived in a world full of gossipers who thought other people's lives were soap operas that existed to entertain them. He just hoped he hadn't given Tomori the wrong impression...or more wrong than the ones she'd been having from him.

He leaned back against the alley wall next to the back door, sighing heavily. His fingers loosely grip the bouquet, a couple of red petals having already floated to the ground. It would be so much easier if he had permission to enter the bakery... or if Rihito, Himuro and Kaneda had come with him, then he could have the flowers and chocolate delivered on his behalf...

“Hell fucking no, you idiot! You don't just send your pals to do your dirty work! You have to fix these mistakes by yourself, not by outsourcing the service! That way, you'll end up with a reputation for being a coward, in addition for being a jerk...”

Fuck, why did winning someone back have to be such a tiring and bureaucratic task?! And on top of that, there were no guarantees that he would get her forgiveness, as Rihito put it...

He lifts the bouquet a little, staring at the camellias with a frown. He remembers how Tomori, inside the bakery, returned his wave, a little flushed. He ends up smiling. Even with all those obstacles, he felt it was worth trying, for her...

"Oookay, that's the last garbage bag, now I'm free to take my afternoon nap and- who the hell said you could stay there, you hobo?!"

Okubo jumps when he hears the back door open, followed by the squeaky, indignant voice. And he has to put his arms in front of his face when he's viciously attacked by a garbage bag, which would have hit him square in the face, but didn't because it was cushioned... by the poor flowers in his hand. Holy crap!

"Shit!," He widens his eyes, red petals flying everywhere. "Calm the fuck down, gramps-"

"Get out of here, you troublemaker! The back of the bakery is no place to bum around! Buzz off before I call miss Oomori-"

"Wait, stop! Time out, time out!," Okubo needs to shout for the old man to cease fire and stop tearing the poor bouquet even more; he was desperate to save the few surviving flowers "I'm no hobo, gramps! Chill out, I- aargh, fuck, look what you did to them!," He laments, devastated, embracing the mortal remains of the bouquet as if it were the collapsed body of a maiden. "They were a gift for Miss Uta, damn it!"

"What...!," The old man, whom Okubo recognized as the bakery's janitor, blinks. And then his expression darkens, eyes full of contempt. "Oh. It's you. That good-for-nothing drunkard."

"Screw you! You really don't have to like me, but there's no need to commit a massacre like that!," He shows the destroyed bouquet, indignant and covered in red petals, one of them even balancing on the top of his head. "Flowers should never be hit, not even with a girl! ... No, wait, that came out wrong."

"Huh?," The janitor blinks again, stunned. "Are you drunk or what? Just get out of here before I call Miss Oomori so she can beat your ass again!"

"Hell no!," Okubo stomps one foot while growling, pointing to the old man with the splintered bouquet. "I got permission from the management to wait for Miss Uta at the back of the bakery, and I'm not moving a foot from here!"

"Yeah, like I'd believe that!" The  janitor snorts. "When are you going to see that nobody wants you here, huh? You're just making Tomori feel worse by showing up like that. Don't you think you've already made her suffer enough?"

That makes Okubo put the mangled bouquet down, the urge to keep arguing draining from him like water from a sieve. Paikon glares at him intently, his hostile expression turning suspicious as he watches the bigger man deflate little by little, and he slowly lowers the garbage bag as he sees that he wouldn't have to get into a physical altercation with an almost seven-foot tall gorilla.

"I…," Okubo's voice gets hoarse, and he has to clear his throat before continuing, speaking in a low, unhappy tone, "I'm aware of that. You have no idea how much. And it's precisely because I know this that I want to remedy it. I know I was a piece of shit, gramps," He touches his own chest with the destroyed bouquet, making more loose petals float away. "You'll never hear me deny that. But to fix a mistake, we always need to addmit to it first, right? This is what I'm doing now. And I'm only doing it because I received permission to do so," He holds the box of chocolates in the same hand that the bouquet was in, putting his now free hand in the back pocket of his pants. "I can prove it to you right now. I have messages from Miss Uta right here."

"What- I don't want to read private messages from a co-worker! Are you crazy?," The janitor takes a step away, making a face. "It's personal, dammit, you should've known that!"

"… So you believe me now?"

"What the... aargh, you tricked me!," He exclaims, between indignation and embarrassment. "And no sir, you can wipe that smile off your face right now! Even if that's all true, why should I let you stay here? I swear, these things only happen when I'm about to take my mid-shift nap..."

Okubo wanted to ask what kind of salaried worker took naps in the middle of the day, but then he remembered that he had arrived drunk on a date, so he'd be one to talk. He sighs again, scratching the back of his neck.

"If I leave, could you tell Miss Uta that I'll be waiting in the square nearby? I can just give her her gifts... or what's left of them...," He stares at the destroyed bouquet with a melancholy expression. "And then I'll be gone. I really don't want to impose myself or get in anyone's way."

"Hunf… don't you dare think you can fool me with this 'repentant good guy' persona," The janitor snorts, still suspicious, while looking him up and down. "You sub-celebrities are all the same. I tried to warn Tomori, but sometimes you'll only learn the hard way."

Okubo almost swears at the old man, his patience hanging by a thread, but he holds back as best he can. He didn't want to make a scene and make things even more difficult for Tomori. Not to mention that... he comes to a conclusion that makes him open an involuntary half smile.

“You… you really care about her, don't you? Miss Kanami, the girl who works as a waitress, the cashier, you... she must be the sun of this whole fucking bakery, to be protected like that. I shouldn't be surprised, she's really amazing."

The janitor's sour expression fades, surprise visible in his eyes, in the way the lines in his face had smoothed out. He opens his mouth, looking like he wants to say something, but is interrupted when the back door opens again.

"Eh, I wouldn't say that. Kanny is the one I'd call the sun, since she supports the planets that orbit her by signing paychecks."

Both turned around and saw Tomori, who was leaving through the door with her arms crossed, without her apron and with her hair free of that net. Okubo immediately straightens his back, widening his eyes and blushing hard, the petals that had landed on his shoulders falling to the ground.

"Miss Uta! Sorry about what happened earlier, I swear I didn't want to draw attention to myself, but with a guy my size it's kinda hard, hahaha..."

"Hunf… It's hard to believe that, with all this extravagance...," The janitor indicates the bouquet and the box of chocolates, to which Okubo hugs them as if wanting to protect them from him.

"An extravagance that your coworker deserved, but you blew it! You heartless monster! The poor flowers didn't deserve this...," He pouts, and Tomori turns her face to the side, clenching her mouth tightly to keep from laughing.

“Then the next time I want to hit you with a garbage bag, don't use them as a shield."

"It was a reflex, man! I wasn't expecting to be ambushed like that!"

“I didn't ambush anyone. I was just getting rid of the garbage, then I bumped into a freaking gorilla lying in wait at the door, so I also acted reflexively."

"Gorilla? Would a gorilla have brought this, by any chance?!," Okubo practically shoves the bouquet under his nose, and Tomori can't hold back her laughter when the old man sneezes hard.

"Don't shove that crap in my face, dang it! I'm already too old to have an allergic attack... yes, girl, have a good laugh at the misfortune of others, especially when one of 'em was trying to protect your honor," He mutters, also pouting, and Tomori shakes her head.

"Hahaha, sorry, Paikon! It's just that the exchange between you guys was too funny to interrupt," She puts a fist to her mouth, clearing her throat to control herself. "And thanks for trying to defend me, but there's no need. Tomoyo asked him to wait for me here at the back door."

"And you're just letting me know about this now?"

“You were too busy back in the pantry, napping between restocking."

"Hah! Told you so!," Okubo turns to the other man, smiling victoriously. Paikon blinks, unimpressed, to which Okubo flinches as he remembers that Tomori was still there. "I -I mean… I tried to explain, but he wouldn't listen to me! And the poor flowers had to pay the price..."

"Ooh…," Tomori looks at the destroyed bouquet, seeming to think a bit before turning to the janitor, saying, "Can you leave us alone? I want to talk to him privately."

"Hunf... if he tries anything funny-"

"He won't, Paikon," She assures, smiling a little, "I may not be sure of many things about him, but I'm one hundred percent sure of that."

Paikon didn't look too convinced, but Okubo couldn't care less. He even hugs the torn bouquet closer, staring at Tomori with an expression half fascinated, half hopeful. The old man takes a good look at his face and, with a shrug, seems to conclude that he didn't pose enough of an immediate danger.

"Okay. If you need any help, scream. I think there's still enough trash accumulated for one more bag like the first one," He grumbles as he opens the dumpster, throwing the bag inside, and then walking back in through the back door, ignoring the Okubo's sarcastic laugh.

"Haha, how funny! Don't worry, I'll make sure to get an even bigger bouquet to cushion the impact! Hunf...," He touches the petals of the remaining flowers. "Look, it's nice to see how they care about you and I don't blame any of them for not liking me, but these flowers were innocent. At least I managed to save some..."

"I told Rihito this and I'll tell you too: we're all like a stepfamily and we take care of each other," She says as she approaches, closing the door behind her, still with her arms crossed. "They're still not very… receptive, if you know what I mean. It's still very recent."

"I know. That's why I apologized for the scene I caused earlier. These people were so freakin' nosy, goddamn," He snorts. "The customers, not your coworkers. It's like they've never seen a guy trying to be a gentleman before..."

“Nope, they've already seen that. Valentine's Day is usually one of our busiest days," She comments, then blushes a little. "Full of chocolate, flowers… y'know, the whole package. They must have thought that... that there was going to be a love confession or something..."

Okubo feels heat rising up his neck, burning in his face and ears. He has a brief coughing fit, looking away. And the two of them just stand there next to each other, embarrassment clogging their throats. Hell, it was a good thing there weren't any paparazzi around...

"Uuh... sorry about that, I didn't mean to...," He murmurs, shily, and she nods, still not looking at him.

"Yeah, I guessed it. But you could've texted me that you'd show up anyway. It was kinda sudden."

"I know, but I wanted to surprise you and… oh, yeah! Here!," He immediately turns to her, holding out the bouquet, agitated, only to remember that the arrangement was destroyed. He grunts. "Dammit…," And puts his hand over his face. The hand that held the box of chocolates. The thud is accompanied by the sound of several small objects rattling around inside the box. And of course, his scream. "Ow! Holy shit...!"

Tomori can't help it, letting out a nasal laugh while averting her face so as not to be hit in the face by the flowers, offered with so much enthusiasm. "Ahahaha, damn... take it easy, I don't judge gifts like I judge amateur rice balls. You don't need to get nervous, Mr. Okubo... pffft," And she had to hold back her laughter again as she lifted her head and saw him rubbing the spot where the box had hit him. He looks at her with a half-amused pout.

"I-I know, it's just that the surprise was masterfully spoiled and that frustrated me a little," He tries to justify himself, shrugging. "But I think I kinda deserve it for having messed with that retired Yakuza, now janitor..."

Tomori laughs harder, and dammit, Okubo would never complain about seeing her have fun like that, even if it was at his expense. He preferred a Tomori laughing at his particular misfortune than a Tomori treating him with coldness or animosity, however much he deserved it.

"The- The funniest thing is that you're not the first one to think that Paikon used to be a yakuza, hahaha! But relax, you won't find any tattoos or phalanxes missing from him. Anyway...," She extends her arms, accepting the bouquet. "Thank you. They are beautiful... or they were. Poor things..."

"Did you like 'em? I thought of roses at first, but decided it was too cliché. Although camellias look a little like roses, so I don't know if it makes any difference... well, I don't know anything about flowers, I just know that I remembered you as soon as I saw them," He smiles a lot, proud of that line ... until he looked at the flowers again and gulped at the memory of how they'd been destroyed. "I mean, when they weren't wrecked! When they were still pretty, like you... but you're still pretty! They're aren't anymore, but you still are and... damn it, just kill me already, please...," He moans in a defeated tone, hiding his red face with one hand. Tomori bites her bottom lip, looking like she's trying really hard not to smile.

"Haha, relax, I got it. It was a tragedy, but at least some were saved," She points to three of the flowers, which miraculously remained intact. "So it was worth the effort. And that other box...?"

"Uh- Oh yes!," He straightens up, holding the box of chocolates with both hands and offering it to her too. "You said once that you got sick of eating sugary stuff because of your work, so I brought dark chocolate! It’s pure cocoa..."

"Oh, you remembered? That's very thoughtful and...," She goes on to say, picking up the box and inspecting the gifts with a half smile, but her next words die in her mouth when she sees the logo emblazoned on the box. My God, wasn't that... wasn't that a famous and very expensive Swiss brand? She and Kanami used to buy quality chocolate for the bakery's recipes, but nothing on that level. And with the flowers now crumpled and torn apart, she could see better inside the cellophane. Was that a price tag? Holy shit, all those zeros...! "Uh... yes, it's- it's very thoughtful... my god, Mr. Okubo..."

"What? You- You don't like dark chocolate?," he asks, leaning toward her nervously, to which she shakes her head.

"No, I like it! It's just that..."

"Is it the flowers then? You don't like camellias? Goddanmit, I knew I should've chosen the roses, they're a classic, you can't go wrong with roses...!," He laments, putting a hand on his forehead. "Or is it because they’re all mangled? It was an accident, I didn't intend to use the bouquet as a shield, the fighter reflexes just kicked in-"

"No, it's not that!," She needs to raise her voice to make herself heard above his babbling. "I have no problem with camellias, and I know you didn't ruin the bouquet on purpose. It's just… this is all…," She looks from one gift to the other, embarrassed. "Mr. Okubo, how much… how much did you spend on these things, in total?"

"Uuh… hey, come on, you don't just ask the price of a heartfelt gift," He tries to dismiss the conversation, gesturing vaguely. "What matters is the intention behind it. Isn't that what they say?"

"Yes, but it's hard not to ask when you see the price tag firsthand." Okubo widens his eyes.

"Oh… holy shit, I… I swear I didn't see that tag there," He shrugs his shoulders a little. "But the price doesn't change the fact that it was bought with consideration-"

"And isn't this chocolate brand not imported?," She asks, not giving him time to keep talk. "The kind that we could never use in the bakery except for private orders, it's so expensive..."

“Well… yeah, but that just shows even more consideration, don't you think?," He tries to smile, hands on his hips. "It's some fancy stuff, so it must be really good, right? I'll have to rely on your feedback because I haven't tasted any of ‘em, they're all yours!"

Tomori doesn't respond. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, looking to the side, the smile on her face looking much more like a grimace.

"Heh... th-thanks, that was... very kind of you..."

Okubo stares at her, his stomach dropping a little at her expression. He might be a total zero when it came to interpreting expressions and body language outside the fight rings, but he'd have to be blind not to notice her obvious discomfort.

"... You didn't like it, did you?," He asks, but it came out more like a statement. He felt himself deflate like a balloon, his excitement replaced by sadness and anger at himself. Damn it, why did he always have to screw up the simplest things when it came to her?! He stares at the floor, not seeing when she shakes her head.

"No, it's not that I didn't like it. I mean, who doesn't like to receive gifts like these?," She hurries to say, bringing the box close to her chest. "It’s just that… look, I’ll be real," She sighs heavily. "I know I gave you carte blanche to try to prove to me that you can and want to be better, but... but to start like this, with such expensive gifts... oh, damn, now I sound like an ungrateful bitch," She groans, throwing her head back a little. "But well, you can't blame me for thinking this smacks of bribery. You, trying to buy me, I mean."

He jerks his head up, blinking in astonishment, his jaw dropping a little.

"Buy you…? Just because of some gifts?"

"They are not simple gifts! One is a box of fine Swiss chocolates and the other is a bouquet that costs... jeez, I don't even have the brains to count all those zeros right now!," She gestures with some frustration. "They are expensive and a bit extravagant, you know?"

"Uh… no," He shakes his head, perplexed. "It wasn't expensive for me. I didn't even look at the prices, to be honest. I just... I just thought you'd like ‘em so I decided to buy ‘em. It's that simple."

Tomori stares at him intently, seriously, and it was Okubo's turn to shift with some discomfort. The silence stretches out for a few more awkward seconds before she relaxes her posture a little, her expression contemplative.

"So… you didn't buy all this focusing only on the fact that they are expensive things?"

"Well… I kinda went to more fancy establishments, so to speak, but I focused more on the things that reminded me of you. Y'know...? Pastry chef who definitely works with chocolate, flowers for a flower, you know what I mean, haha...," He blushes some more. She stares at the gifts again.

"And you didn't conclude, not for a second, that I would be more inclined to forgive you if I got a pricey treat? Really?"

He turns back to her, blinking… and yeah, now he was starting to take offense.

"Of course not! Damn, I know I screwed up badly, but seriously, does that have to mean that every action I take from now on is going to be a bribe?," He gestures in frustration. "Can't this just be a nice gesture from a guy who is sorry and wants to fix his mistakes?"

"Yeah, it can, but it's hard not to doubt it, considering so many guys think they can buy women if they're open-handed enough!," She raises her voice in the same tone. "I don't want you to think I'm that kind of person! I don't want you to think getting my forgiveness is that easy!"

“I don't! It's just- aargh!," He grabs his head with his hands while throwing it back dramatically. "This isn't working! We're not going anywhere if my every attempt to get closer is met with suspicion!"

"Yeah, and whose fault is that?," She points at him, snarling, and even though she had to stretch her neck to look him in the eyes, she didn't look fearful in the slightest. "You gave me reasons to be suspicious! I'm trying to be more open, but it's hard when you're showing off your bank account like that, Mr. ‘Heavyweight champion of the biggest fight promotion in the world’!”

"Wait, is that your problem then? The fact that I have money?," He snorts angrily. "Lady, don’t you think that, if I really wanted to buy you, I would've brought something much more elaborate than flowers and chocolate? Like a necklace made of real pearls..."

"Argh, no! I don't even want to think about it!" She shudders, horrified, but Okubo doesn't stop there.

"Even better! A pair of white gold earrings, eighteen carats!"

"No!"

“Twenty-four carats is better? Boy, you're a tough one, huh!"

"This is even worse!," She screeches, and all that desperation was, for Okubo, satisfying, hilarious and adorable.

"Ooh, not a jewelry connoisseur, I see. How about clothes then? An Undercover jacket or pants from Yohji Yamamoto's exclusive line..."

"My God, no!," She grabs his arm in reflex, which takes him by surprise but also makes him even more excited.

"Do you prefer overseas brands? Let's do overseas brands then! A Louis Vuitton bag, a Dolce & Gabbana dress..."

"Nooooooo...!”

"Coco Chanel shoes! A Jimmy Choo perfume! I can do this all day, lady, expensive stuff is plentiful!"

"Okay, okay, stop! I get it, it could've been much worse! Oh my gohohohod!," She doubles over herself a little, falling into a fit of hysterical laughter, and he can't help himself either, accompanying her, the two of them laughing like idiots in the middle of that alley, attracting the confused looks of those who passed by the sidewalk further on and heard them.

Damn... That way, it was very easy to forget that she still hadn't forgiven him for his attitude. He allows himself to fantasize for a few seconds that everything was fine between them again, until he is brought back to reality when her laughter fades, interrupted by coughing, until it stops altogether. She holds the bouquet and box in one hand and puts the other in front of her mouth, clearing her throat.

"Okay... Maybe- Maybe I exaggerated a bit," She admits after taking a deep breath. "Maybe that wasn't your intention, but there was no way for me to be sure. I...," She blushes a little, looking up at him. "I'm still in the middle of the healing process, Mr. Okubo. And for you to arrive like this, with gifts like these, it kinda overwhelmed me. I liked it, really, but at the same time...," She gestures uncertainly.

Okubo sighs, closing his eyes and scratching the back of his neck. He never imagined that a box of chocolates and a measly bouquet of flowers could cause all that confusion. Now he felt a little guilty. He just wanted to prove how serious he was when he said he wanted to regain her trust more than anything...

“Yeah…again, sorry about that. But I swear my intention was never to buy you or anything like that. I...," He leans his back against the alley wall, close to the dumpster, looking at the ground with embarrassment. "I just thought that this would be a good way to demonstrate that I want and that I can be better... that and the fact that I don't know how to show interest in any other way."

"... What do you mean?," Tomori asks after a few seconds of silence, approaching and leaning against the wall beside him, still hugging her gifts. He turns his eyes to her with a small pout.

“It's just… I told you that day, remember? I'm an idiot who can't have a normal conversation with a girl to save his life," He rubs his left arm with his right hand. "I've never had the slightest knack when it comes to dealing with women, when it comes to showing them when I'm interested. I always make a fool of myself or come on too strongly, and I end up scaring them away. It was kind of one of the reasons Rihito and I became friends, you know?," He smiles shyly. "He also doesn't know shit about wooing women, and misery sure loves company, haha."

Tomori ends up laughing, shoulders shaking a little. "Hahaha, damn… a few weeks ago I would've found it hard to believe. But you guys aren't that bad. Just..."

"Just inconvenient and desperate, I know," He nods, resigned. "That's exactly why I try to approach women in safer ways, you know? Everyone likes to get gifts, it's an easy way to show how you're feeling, how much you like the person you're giving them to... even more so for losers like me," He puts his hands in his pants pockets, looking upset. "That's the only way I know how to do it and the only way I've managed to not screw things up…until now."

Tomori tightens her mouth a little, now as embarrassed as he was. She looks back at the gifts in her hands, bringing them to her chest again as she shrugs.

"No… you didn't screw it up," She murmurs at last. "I said I liked them. Camellias aren't my favorite flower, but they're still beautiful. And a brand of quality chocolate like this is not something I could eat whenever I wanted. I appreciate the intention, Mr. Okubo, I swear. But..."

"But...?," He instigates her, a little recklessly, and she again makes that gesture of tucking a lock of hair behind her ear.

"But expensive gifts make me embarrassed. I'm left feeling like I'm in debt, and I couldn't buy you anything on that level without blowing some of my savings."

"But you don't have to! I'm not giving you these things expecting something of equal value in return," He assures, leaning down to bring his face closer to hers, his gray eyes intense. "I don't expect anything in return, really. I just..."

“I just want to see you smile at me like you used to. I want you to enjoy my company like you used to, before I let you down.”

He didn't voice that thought, but from the way Tomori was looking at him, he didn't have to. Her eyes, large, brown and expressive, hold his intently, her full lips opening as if she wanted to say something but doesn't know how. He wanted more than ever to reach down and touch that mouth with his, holy shit...!

"Well, if…," She licks her lips, bending her left leg and resting her foot on the wall behind her. "If this is just your way of showing how you feel, then… then you can give me gifts, if you like.

"Really?," He widened his eyes, which were shining brightly in his excitement, and she blushed again.

"Yeah, really. But don't go off the rails, okay?," She raises an index finger at him, her expression serious. "No expensive and extravagant things, please. If you really want to give me a gift, give me something that better demonstrates those feelings you talk about so much. Flowers and chocolate are always nice, but those aren't the only things a girl can like, you know?"

"Ooh…okay then," He nods in understanding. "Something more sentimental, then? Alright, I got it. The thing is, I don't know much about your tastes outside of confectionary and martial arts...," He gestures sheepishly, looking sideways at her. And then he smiles, turning around and leaning sideways against the wall, crossing his arms and arching an eyebrow. "How about enlightening me a little, huh?"

She rolls her eyes, but her half-smile looks affectionate, "I haven't even given you carte blanche and you're already trying to cheat? It’d be too easy if I just told you."

"Oh, c'mon! At least give me some clues," He complains, but the smile hasn't disappeared from his face. "Camellias aren't your favorite flowers, right? What's your favorite then? What letter does it start with? It rhymes with what? What are the most common allergies associated with it? Help a poor bastard out, lady, please..."

She lets out a fart-like sound from her mouth, turning her face to the side in an attempt to hide her laughter.

"I- I haven't seen any reason to make your life that easy so far, so give it up! You'll have to find out on your own."

"You're a difficult woman…," He sighs theatrically, closing his eyes. "It's a good thing that Okubo Naoya never gave up on things just because they were difficult," And he smiled, opening his eyes again, which were soft and tender when focused on her . And he is elated when she blushes even more.

"C'mon, I'm not that difficult," She bats her eyelashes at him. "I'm letting you get closer to try to figure it out, aren't I? So... keep trying. Surprise me. I'll be here, waiting for more of your attempts."

For him, it was as if she had offered him the winning lottery ticket. More attempts... he was entitled to more attemps! And to think that she willingly wanted to give him those chances made him want to start dancing right there in the alley.

"O-Okay! So can I interpret this as an invitation to show up here more often?"

"With prior notice," She points at him. "That way I'm not caught off guard and Kanny and the others don't get too upset. They still haven't forgiven you either, you know."

"Jezz, does that mean I'm also going to have to win them back?," He snorts. "Can I know their favorite flowers, at least?"

She laughs out loud, putting a hand in front of her mouth. She didn't usually hide her laughter this much when she was still on good terms with him. But Okubo was determined to change that.

"My god, hahahaha...!," She wipes away a tear from the corner of her right eye. "If- If you tried to give Kanny flowers, she’d punch you again and there would be no bouquet able to cushion that impact. It’s better to not even try."

"I won't. There's only one person I want to bring flowers to, if she's nice enough to nudge me in the right directions..."

"Nah-ah. I'm not falling for that," She shakes a finger at him, smirking, but the flattered blush on her cheeks was unmistakable. "You said yourself that you never gave up on things just because they were difficult, didn't you? I want to see this with my own eyes."

"But you've seen it, if you've really been watching me since the times when I practiced wrestling."

"Fighting arenas and the real life are different places. People can be one way in one and another way in the other. And I said I want to get to know you better here," She points to the space between them. "I want this from you more than I want gifs."

He nods, embarrassed, but still happy. If that meant more opportunities to be with her like this, then dammit, he'd be happy to let her know every single thing of him.

"Ahaha… alright then. But you know what I want from you now?" He leans toward her again, smirking, and she looks at him suspiciously, a warning in her gaze.

"What?"

"You, trying the chocolates I brought you."

She clearly wasn't expecting this, considering how her expression went from wary to stunned.

"Uh… That's it?"

"Yeah! Having my amateur rice balls judged by a professional made me feel spoiled and I got used to it. Now I want it again," He turns his head to the side. "Only with dessert this time."

"Ahaha, but that wouldn't make sense. You didn't make these chocolates, so I can't judge your cooking based on them," She shakes the box a little, which makes that rattling sound. His smile widens.

"Judge my taste in them, then. I particularly think it's great, considering how much I like your cookies."

“Grunf… I already told you to keep that silver tongue of yours in check…” She snorts, making an absurd effort not to smile. He raises his hands in surrender, his smile becoming more pleading. And with a sigh, she concedes, tearing the seal that held the box closed and opening it. The chocolates had come out of their respective compartments, scattered around the box, and he remembered with embarrassment that they had melted a little before he put them in the fridge. The handmade truffles were now a little misshapen. But she didn't seem to mind, picking up one and biting it in half, slowly, savoring it. He watches her intently, waiting with some trepidation.

"So? Too bitter?"

She looks up at him, finishing chewing. And then she smiles; that lovely smile he had missed so much.

"Yes! Just the way I like it!"

And even if he wasn't the one to make those chocolates, the compliment made him as happy as if he was.

* * *

"So? How was it with your bald sucker?"

Tomori smiles awkwardly as she returns to the kitchens, having returned from her lunch break. She brought with her the box of chocolates and the three camellias, the only survivors of the accidental massacre that Paikon had committed. She shrugs, trying to look calm.

"Better than I expected. Can I put these flowers in the water, Kanny? I don't want them to dry out."

"Sure. You can grab any container we're not using," The baker nods, watching as she goes to look for that container. Tomori felt her eyes glued to her back, knowing full well that she couldn't escape her friend's questions, and wondering if she could hide enough the conflicting feelings that battled inside her. She fills a measuring cup with water and places the flowers inside, setting them in a corner and admiring them for a moment before going to retrieve her apron and hairnet. Kanami kept following her movements attentively.

"So... what happened to the rest of the bouquet?"

"Paikon destroyed in an attack worthy of a yakuza ambush."

"Uh... I was going to say it serves him right, but then I remembered that they were a gift for you, so...," She makes an uncertain gesture, to which Tomori shrugs.

"He managed to save three of them, so that's something," She puts the chocolates aside too, and when she sees her friend looking at her with a mixture of distrust and interest, she invites, "You can have one, Kanny. You recognize the brand, right?"

"Yeah. It's the kind of brand that we could never use on the bakery's cakes, otherwise no one would have the money to buy 'em," She comments while picking up a truffle. "Thanks, Tomoh… hnnn, wow…," She puts it in her mouth and sighs while chewing. "Pure, quality cocoa. It’s delicious!"

"I know, right! Damn, I had to hold back from having a culinary orgasm in front of him to keep some of my dignity," Tomori laughs, and Kanami joins in, despite still being wary.

"Haha, I can imagine. But speaking of dignity...," She frowns, trying to stay serious. "I know I have no right to demand anything, but I hope you didn't get carried away by some expensive gifts and the snap of a silver tongue. I worry about how this might affect you..."

"Don't worry, I stood my ground," She assures. And then she looks at the floor while putting on her apron. "But… I admit it was hard to resist. We had a very enlightening conversation, you know. And when I said that I won't accept any attempt to buy me, he understood and didn't try to argue. He even made it clear that this wasn't his intention."

"… And what was your verdict?," Kanami asks after two seconds of silence. Tomori bites her bottom lip.

“That he really wasn't who I thought he was. But that doesn't have to be a bad thing either," She concludes. "I really want to see how far he's willing to go, Kanny. How much he values ​​what we have, even if it's nothing serious. I want to test the waters more... and make him suffer a little while trying," She admits, smiling when Kanami laughs heartily.

"A she-wolf in sheep's clothing, as Akane always says. Go for it, that's what that stupid gorilla deserves."

"Hehe, leave it to me! And... uugh...," She groans suddenly, turning her attention back to the flowers. Kanami blinks.

"What is it?"

"He brought me red camellias. I wonder if he knows about the symbolism behind them...," She blushes a lot, pressing her hands to her chest. "You know? That they represent romantic love..."

The baker didn't know what she wanted to do more: to laugh in her friend's face or to grunt and roll her eyes at her obsessive romanticism. She opts for a middle ground.

"Girl, I doubt it. A man like that doesn't care about these things. A flower shop employee probably suggested camellias when he said he wanted to impress a girl, nothing more than that."

"Yeah, I guess you're right… let's just get back to work, thinking about it will only distract me," She sighs, and Kanami nods satisfied.

Tomori wanted more than anything to stand firm in her convictions and not give in to Okubo's wooing so easily. He really had to earn her forgiveness. But dammit, if he kept being cute like that, showing her a side of himself she hadn't even dreamed existed, forgiving him would be easier than she wanted it to be.

NEXT CHAPTER

[avintagekiss24]

Hi! I don't want to start anything on here and am always willing for civil conversations. At this point there's so much I've found out about Seb (besides the video he liked, the tommy lee thing, and the girlfriend thing) that I feel so guilty if I would continue to support him. I love him sm but it just doesn't look good rn. He is associated/follows an organisation (for helping veterans) that has posted a blue lives matter flag picture and who's co-founder has sexual assault allegations against him, and worked with him in 'The last full measure'. His friend Paul Walter Hauser has done blackface in the past, and when called out on it he just listed a few people that also did blackface. There's more, I found a discussion on here that I can link. I seriously don't support "cancel culture" bc I don't think it helps anyone but there are just a lot of 'mistakes' and shady people that can be linked to Seb, I wish it wouldn't be that way. I honestly don't know what to think about it anymore.

Hi! I’m also open to having civil conversations and I don’t believe you’re trying to start anything. I really do think this situation of dragging up a four year old video and taking it completely out of context is harmful not just to Black people, but to fandom/activism in general. This is gonna be long because I’m going to take your points one by one, and I want to preface this by saying that I will not answer any derogatory, sideways asks pertaining to this subject. I will delete every single one and will block your silly ass. I’m not going to argue with people who think I’m blindly supporting Sebastian because I’m just trying to get fucked by him, or people who think I hate myself and am trying to appease some white man.

So, on with the discourse!

The video he liked - this video was taken completely out of context and that is my main issue with this whole situation. It was not a video of a white man saying that he thinks he should be able to say the n word as everyone claimed it was. They were quickly debating on whether or not it's okay to say in rap lyrics. He was told no, that's not okay, that's never okay and they moved on from it. That's it. End of story. That somehow was twisted into a click bait style headline of "Sebastian Stan likes a video of a white man defending his right to say the n word" when that is absolutely not true. My other issue is that people are more upset that Sebastian liked the video than they are about the white man in the video literally saying the n word. So, do you really care about the use of the n word like you're claiming? Cuz if you do, you'd be more upset at the white man that said the word than you would be about the white man simply liking the video. Or, are you just using this as an excuse to grandstand against a white man you don't like?

The Tommy Lee thing - Sebastian Stan playing Tommy Lee does not make Sebastian Stan a bad person. Is Charlize Theron a bad person for playing Aileen Wuornos, a prostitute who started murdering men? Is Leonardo DiCaprio a bad person for playing a slave owner? Is Edward Norton a bad person for playing a nazi sympathizing racist? Actors play bad people. That doesn't mean that they themselves are bad people. 1990's Tommy Lee was a bad person, but that should have no bearing on who Sebastian Stan is or his character as a man.

The gf/Paul Walter Hauser thing - Why are we holding Sebastian accountable for what the people around him are doing? Again, why are we more upset that Sebastian is associated with people who have done questionable things than the specific people themselves? I'm not going to speak on the kimono wearing -- I'm not Asian. It's not my place to say whether or not its offensive because it's not my culture, but she posted that picture and attended that party before she started dating Sebastian, quite possibly before she even knew him. Same with Paul. I think that black face thing was long before he knew Sebastian. Now, if Sebastian was defending these actions, going around saying "I think it's okay for white women to wear Kimono's" "I think black face is fine" "I think white people should be able to say the n word" then we'd have a different story, wouldn't we? But that's not what we have, and that's not what he is doing. He is not responsible for the things his friends do or have done in the past just because he's more famous than they are, and he is not required to speak on them. Let's put it this way -- would you be comfortable having to be responsible for something a friend of yours did before you knew them? Would you want to have to be forced to answer for your friend when you yourself had nothing to do with the questionable behavior?

The organization that supports the military/blue lives matter - Sebastian cannot control what message that foundation puts out and it does not mean that he is or is not pro-police himself. There is not enough concrete evidence -- if any evidence for that matter -- that Sebastian is a blue lives matter supporter. Did Sebastian donate before they put up the blue lives matter post? Or after? I don’t know, cuz I don’t follow him that closely, but if he donates before they come out with a particular stance, that means he should be held accountable for that? I know I donated to an organization once and they turned out to support something that i’m 100% against. That means I’m a bad person because I couldn’t see into the future? Another point, how can we be certain that Sebastian saw the blue lives matter post in the first place? I know I’m not online 24 hrs a day, I miss posts all the time and I’m just an average person. I make three or four tumblr posts a day, and I’m gone. I have to play catch up on social media, and even then, I still miss stuff. So I’m sure the same happens to a working actor. As for the co-founder, I don't know who this person is and would rather not get into any allegations against them because I don't want to trigger anyone who comes across this post. If Sebastian knows about these allegations, is a willing participant/supporter of this person then yeah, that's pretty shitty, but we don't know the inner workings of this friendship/acquaintance/work relationship. We don’t know how close they are or if they even still speak.

I’m a pretty big fan of Don Cheadle. He’s a stand up guy, he’s a great actor, he’s funny, he’s political and stands up for what he believes in and in a very public way. I support him. Don Cheadle is also friends with Chris Evans, RDJ, Mark Ruffalo, and Letitia Wright (just to name a few). Chris Evans has a bipartisan forum that highlights/promotes right wing politicians, RDJ defended Chris Pratt during the whole “he’s the worst Chris in Hollywood” crap, who’s technically done black face, and who once said to a female reporter “nice tits” when she walked into the room, Mark Ruffalo just walked back his support of Palestine, and Letitia Wright retweeted/supported an anti-vaxxer/anti-trans Pastor who equated an ingredient of the covid vaccine to the devil because it contained some parts of the word Lucifer. Does that mean Don is now a bad person because he’s friends with these people? Why isn’t he getting any heat for his friendships with them? Why isn’t he being held accountable for what they’ve done and said? Oh right, because he’s not a white fave. So people don’t care one way or the other, which brings me to my next point. 

I can guarantee you that if Sebastian’s gf or Paul or this co-founder were not associated with Sebastian in any way, nobody would give a shit about her wearing a kimono, about Paul doing black face, or about the co-founder/organization being blue lives matter supporters and in that lies the actual problem. Being critical of people and their actions should be consistent and should happen all the time -- not just when they interact with your white fave. That’s when it becomes performative and looks like you just want to be able to show internet people that you follow/support/stan unproblematic celebrities, when really, you don’t care.

I think the moral of this post is that I think it's unfair to hold a complete stranger to a standard that I cannot hold myself to. I also don't view celebrities the way most teenagers/twenty somethings do, and that’s because when I entered fandom we didn't have social media, so I grew up with a wall between myself and said celebrities. There is no wall now with the presence of social media. "Fans" nowadays have a weird ownership feeling over celebrities because they can read their personal thoughts or view personal pictures and think that they have this personal quasi-friendship with them. I can't get on board with that. I prefer having the wall and I still keep the wall.

If supporting Sebastian makes you uncomfortable, then by all means, stop supporting him. Just make sure you are making this decision for yourself based on credible sources and concrete evidence and that you're not letting this fake woke activist mob make you feel uncomfortable. Internet activism means nothing unless you put your money where your mouth is in your real life and 90% of the social justice internet warriors do not. Real activism is bigger than changing your avi to a black square.

[amazingspiderfield]

do you think they're gonna make TASM3 since everyone is asking on twitter?

Oh, boy. I... honestly don't know. I think a lot of things would have to happen first for it to work. Warning: this is long.

For starters, I don't even know if Andrew Garfield would want to come back for a solo movie. Team ups maybe, but a solo movie is complicated for all the things that come with it, like actually doing promo for it and maybe giving up on other projects because of scheduling conflicts (he dropped a lot of projects between 2010 and 2015 because of these movies, I'm not sure he'd be willing to do that again).

Now, assuming he's actually on board with it, I see three issues here:

1) It can't be the same plot they had planned for TASM3 in 2015 because there's a seven year gap there that would make it look weird. However, since TASM was a retelling of The Night Gwen Stacy died, it's only fair the third movie is also about her somehow and the only story I see working as a part of the trilogy is an adaptation of Spider-Man: Blue.

For those that aren't familiar with it, Spider-Man: Blue is a series of comics in which Peter recounts into a tape recorder how Gwen and he fell in love, in the context of him feeling "blue" during Valentine's Day years after she died.

The problem with this is we already saw how they fell in love in the first TASM movie, but I guess they could change things up a little bit and make it about him updating Gwen on how he’s been since she died. NWH kinda gets in the way of this fitting perfectly within the theme of these movies, but whatever, I’m sure they can work around it. It’s probably not a very cinematic story to tell in the “superhero genre” tbh, but I think they can find a way.

2) Assuming they had the plot and it’s something like this one, the second issue is the actors. I don’t think Emma Stone would want to come back. As far as I know she has a good relationship with Andrew Garfield, but I doubt she wants to be in a movie with him after how some fans have acted since they broke up. I’ve heard some people had left nasty comments on her husband’s social media about her being better off with AG. Also, she just had a baby, she wouldn't want to expose her family like that just for a superhero movie (or any movie for that matter).

Sally Field hated the TASM movies from the beginning, she’s definitely out as well, and I don’t know if they’re planning on bringing back Shailene Woodley and Dane DeHaan, that would depend on what kind of story they want to tell, but it’s here where the seven year gap would be more noticeable because they’d have to explain a shit ton of things there so it doesn’t look like the universe was dead during that time.

3) Finally, the third issue is who’s gonna direct the movie. Marc Webb was really disappointed after TASM2, it’d be a miracle if he accepts doing TASM3. If he doesn’t, they have to find a director with more or less the same style for the trilogy to be cohesive. Maybe if they bring the big checks and guarantee creative freedom, Webb would accept, but that’s completely up to him.

Do I think Sony cares about any of this? Honestly no and neither do the fans on Twitter. As far as I understand it, they only want to see Andrew Garfield kicking Tom Hardy’s ass, in which case it’d make more sense for Andrew to show up in Venom 3 than for Tom Hardy to be the villain in TASM3, but the second means more money so I don’t see them passing up that chance.

The best we can do is to wait for any official announcements because trying to revive a trilogy as conflictive as TASM was is… complicated. Right now I think it's too early to say for sure what’s gonna happen.

[genshin-obsessed]

I dread everything about school, sure, I got some friends. But that doesn't help ease the pain of having a mental breakdown the night before school starts.

I've given up trying to ask my mom or dad if I could get a day off, my mom wouldn't allow me since my dad won't let me. My dad has said he only cares about my education, so I don't see the point in trying anymore.

I envy people who have a mental break day where they can skip school/work. Even in the weekend I can't get rest without thinking about tomorrow. I had a breakdown last week and ended up being yelled at by my dad. Now I really don't think he cares about me besides getting an education.

I already plan on getting an actual job, started a business, how much longer do I have to suffer before I can just get a day off? Or when will I ever be good enough for him?? I'm trying to do things that make me useable enough for society, even though my grades are fucking failing and I can't stop lashing out on things.

These things don't matter anyway, he'll just end up telling me again "and I don't want to go to work" then WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT JOB?? fucking peice of shit, he doesn't care about my mental health unless it makes me unable to be a working citizen and get an education.

I'm so fucking tired, I'm trying to keep everything in, but I'm so afraid. I'm so afraid that something will happen that I can't control. I don't want to hurt someone again, but I don't know how much longer I can keep it all in.

I just have to suck it all up, going to school like nothing happened, again. My suicidal thoughts have started to come back, my anxiety has been worse and worse, and I feel like relapsing again.

The only reason I don't self-harm anymore is so I don't get put into a mental hospital again. But if I end up not keeping all these urges and thoughts away then I'll just end up in the mental hospital or worse, an actual prison. The mental hospital felt like a prison anyway, which is why I'm scared to tell any teacher or adult at my school.

It's also 1am, and I shouldn't be bothering anyone with this. I can't bother my sister, she has to get enough sleep to go to work, and with how much little time I get with her now, it's just like when she was in college and i had nobody. My parents are useless in this situation, because my mom would just get yelled at by my dad for suggesting me staying home. And talking to her feels so.. uncomfortable. My dad is just a no. There is no talk about my mental health, if I'm feeling sad, I'll just have to deal with it.

I'm stuck, I don't know how much longer this will last, but probably for a couple more years.

I wish I could easily take my life away, there is hardly anything I want in life anymore.

Just a note before I start: I made a new tag for anyone to block because I’m gonna allow more serious topics with it. I’ll go with the regular tw tags as well, but this one is just one big tag: 🐚— vent

Right, onto you anon. I wanna start by saying I am so, so sorry you’re going through this. I understand, my mother was extremely hard on me in school. She rarely let me take breaks off of school and kept his idea that I had to attend almost every day to be a good student and to have a good education.

Even in college, both of my parents are pretty hard on me to take “good classes” and not “waste” my time. I don’t think many parents understand the stresses of school and it makes it hard for them to understand how terrible those days can be.

The school system is all messed up. Learning subjects that most of us won’t use- unless you’re choose a job in that particular field- teachers pile on too much homework, everything is just memorization at this point, and it gives us little time to relax. The way some teachers even assign homework makes it hard for us to even relax on weekends, which is why we have them. You really only have summer and even then, some parents force their children into extra activities then.

You feelings are valid. 100%. You’re allowed to feel exhausted, especially when you’re not getting any breaks. Getting through high school is the probably the only thing that’s really required for most jobs. But having a college degree doesn’t mean you’ll be rolling in money. It just means you can have a more secure job but by no means guarantees success. Parents don’t realize that.

For you, especially, it’s all building up. I’m sure you already know this to. Holding it in 100% won’t help. The stress also seems to be affecting your school work and it’s making it harder to pass classes which just leads your parents to lash out. It’s a vicious cycle that just doesn’t stop. And the only way to really stop such a thing is to take a step back, but you’re not even allowed to do that.

I think the attempt to please your dad’s ideals is also adding stress. You want to be good enough, and that’s understandable, but sometimes parents project what they couldn’t do onto us. Sometimes, it’s never enough because at the end of the day, they’re not the ones who could accomplish that. I’m sorry to say that and I hope it doesn’t upset you further, but maybe you should try doing this for yourself and not him. Some parents will never be happy- as sad as it is to say that.

I’m glad you don’t self harm, and I’m really proud of you for breaking away from that. Yes, it may just be to stay away from the mental hospital, but I’m still happy you’re staying away from it. Although, I would recommend talking to someone about this, other than me of course, because I can’t do much for you, unfortunately. I can only listen and offer a bit of advice.

Though you don’t want to stress out your sister, it seems like she may be the only one you can kind of trust. Maybe if you’re of age, you could try talking to a therapist or meeting with a school counselor/therapist. They may be able to actively help you, maybe even working with some of your teachers to lessen the workload. Either way, they’ll be more helpful than me.

I want you to know you’re doing an amazing job though. You’re still going after all of this and I know it seems bad, but I know it’ll get better. I know this isn’t much, but I’m very proud of your resilience.

If anything, when you’re on your own and in college, you can 100% take a break and you’ll definitely deserve it. But I do want you to try and talk to somebody you find you can trust. Or try to reach out for help, because something like this can’t be done alone.

There is one thing I think you want and that’s to be free from all of this. School, your parents, the exhaustion, the stress, and so that can be your goal. Though these days will show up often, maybe the idea of being free from all of this while still being able to live a happy life can be that push you need. I’m not sure if you’re able to move away for college, but I would recommend you do that. It’s a little difficult to be on your own, but you’ll get to choose how you live.

I know my response was kinda all over the place, but I really hope it helped anon💖💖 you’re always welcome to come here and talk to me if you’d like. Maybe about school, homework, just to vent, or chat! I would like to hear how you’re doing too 🥺💖

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, ep 12-16 thoughts! these episodes, in comparison to the first 10 or so, felt way more laid back and low-stakes, which I appreciate sometimes. I didn't appreciate how lazy jack's halfa design was in masters of time, it made me so annoyed I redesigned it. 👎🏻 u_u

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-'picking a fight with me and my upgraded form!' 'you upgraded to a mullet?' DANNNNY. YOU CANT SAY THAT TO TECHNUS. YOUVE HAD A MULLET TWICE NOW ('fun' split danny, and evil future danny BOTH HAD THEM). I HAVE THE RECEIPTS.

-danny seeing technus hurting valerie and yelling I AM GOING TO BREAK YOU IN HALF. SAMEEEE <3

-axion labs is now a part of vladco. FUCK YOU VLAD. hes not even really IN this episode, but just thought I'd throw out a nice fuck you anyway.

-'capable of blasting a single person into space in (2) minutes!' tucker. that would kill someone. i mean yeah they might get to space, but theres NO WAY THEY WOULDNT CATCH FIRE, OR THEIR ORGANS WOULDNT LIQUIFY BECAUSE OF THE STRAIN. THEY'D PROBABLY PASS OUT BEFORE THEN, BUT. ...no, okay, I get why vlad bought this company. this is RIGHT up his alley.

-danny KNOWS VAL DIDNT DO THIS, THAT SOMEONE STOLE THE SUIT. AND SPENDING ALL NIGHT CHATTING WITH HER. <3 and val is a 9TH DEGREE BLACKBELT?? danny's mom is, too!! omg and she hunts ghosts, his parents would love her. and her fav fruit is kumquat bc its a funny word. im so with danny val is amazing. I love her and I Do Not Want To Hear It From Sam.

-I knew danny wanted to be an astronaut, but the bowling tidbit is like. yes give me more useless info abt these characters, I love tiny details that make them feel more human, and im glad hes got hobbies aside from ghost stuff, we dont really see a lot of that!!! (I mean, we knew 'fun' danny from when he split himself in half liked bowling, so obv it makes sense he LIKES it, but hes very GOOD at it. so proud of him, bowling king) val calling him neil armstrong and them teasing each other. LOVE THAT.

-technus you are my favorite grandpa for setting this up. SAM WHY ARE YOU BEING SO CREEPY BE HAPPY FOR YOUR FRIEND!!! STOP SPYING ON THEM!!! who actually cares if technus did 'set them up' together, theyre having fun and enjoy each others company!!! 'you think the universe wants you two to be together?' 'i dunno, but maybe /I/ do!' EXACTLY DANNY!!! SOO TRUE.

-and valerie being happy sam said she wants to try and be happy for them and make room at the lunch table for them. and hugging sam over it. VAL NEEDS MORE FRIENDS.

-VAL GOING AFTER TECHNUS IN HER SUIT WITH (1) MILK, AND (1) TREE BRANCH AND KEYS!!!. I LOVE YOUUUU BEST GIRL. her new suit kicks ass

-dannys like 'HEY IM AN ASTRONAUT :D' AW. ...HES IN SPACE... the fact he's actually intending to give her the ring. with SAMS NAME ON IT?? IM CRINGING DANNY NO. YOU CANT DO THAT...thank god he didnt. thank god valerie cut it off and said they can just stay friends for now. tbh, they both have a lot on their plates!! they obv both still like each other...it can be a future thing!! when she knows about phantom! youre 14 theres no need to rush. I just want her to have friends and be happy :(

-...danny struggles to do (1) pull up. SAME. but all the ghost fighting in phantom form REALLY doesnt carry over at ALL? that sucks

-sam being as fit as she is, is not just a goth. shes a goth jock.

-honey I Shrank Our Kid, One of his Enemies, and his Bully: the episode

-dash's crush on phantom is So Obvious. fitness buddies :) watching them interact always makes me laugh. also, phantom, with PANTS. 'how many costume changes you gonna go through, what is this, vegas??' DASSH DJKSFHASKDF

-MADDIE GOING AFTER THE MOUSE WITH A BROOM, WHAT THE FUCK. AAAH. JUST BUY SOME KIND OF MOUSE TRAP.

-danny likes lime and vinegar chips. which sound very good.

-'our boy finally has the physical prowess of a 60 year old president!' ...poor danny LMAO

-'what's wrong with beauty pageants' oh tucker you sweet naïve child. what ISNT wrong with them. who approved this for a high school?? (I mean, yes. unfortunately child pageants exist, but...) also danny and tucker once again treating the pretty girls like objects. I need to meet the grown man who wrote this, I just want to talk...

-prince aragon's dragon form reminds me of maleficent (color scheme wise) which is always a bonus. considering the episode is called beauty marked, I feel like the sleeping beauty references are deliberate

-sam with the fake fangs. once again her accessories never miss. hate the 'not like other girls, girls who get sucked into this kind of thing are all shallow and all want to be carbon copies' bs tho.

-sam trying to be the Worst Bride, being rude as shit. DORA IS GOING TO GET KILLED. DID YOU MISS THE PART WHERE SHE SAID THE PRINCE WILL HAVE HER HEAD IF YOU ARENT THE IDEAL BRIDE. YOU /KNOW/ DANNY WILL COME SAVE YOU. JUST ACT CHILL UNTIL THEN. even if you were doing fine to get him to take off the crown, consider maybe not letting his poor sister get punished also?? sure, she could also take off the crown and has dragon powers, but did you know that for sure?? dora didnt even really realize it until you guys talked!! (or at least, she was scared to stand up to him. you had no guarantee she would...) but. good for dora. ANOTHER friendly ghost to add to the List :)

-tucker is so under appreciated in his time. if he was doing a tech-based campaign today he'd have a better shot. people in 2004 had NO IDEA how much tech would be a part of our day-to-day lives...altho. tbh if you're going to be running for student council president, maybe you should..focus on things to actually improve the school? since he's going for a tech angle, he could say like, he would be running fundraisers for the schools computers to be upgraded, etc? we've already SEEN he can be good at money-making entrepreneur type stuff!!

-oh my god wait. this episode is JUST YUGIOH?????! A REBORN PHAROH USING A TEENAGER AS A VESSEL?? YESSSSSS

-tucker using his new minion to feed him grapes and carry him. AND LOCUSTS ONTO THE BULLIES. I love how when he's possessed, he gains winged eyeliner.

-this episode is giving me big 'plankton makes everyone in bikini bottom his slaves and build monuments of him from the spongebob movie' vibes. and the pharaoh has a traitor who works for him? VERY big yugioh vibes. aknadin confirmed

-I like that danny is still completely exhausted after using ghostly wail. (still patiently waiting on him to get duplication)

-LOVE the fenton's 80s outfits. I get hes 14 and embarrassed by everything they do because theyre his parents, but. cmon, this is one objectively cool thing theyve done. love 80s fashion.

-...was vlad just standing on that streetlight waiting for danny to come out? how'd he know they'd be coming out the back? how long has he been up there???

-oh, wait, his ecto-acne has flareups? that SUCKS. danny was...well I dont want to say he was LUCKY HE HALF-DIED, but he was lucky his was pretty instant (I'm assuming that had to do with the power/scale of the portals being different?) I remember in the ep we met him, vlad made a point of saying he was stuck in a hospital for a long time, so. that really actually sucks and I feel bad. not that it excuses anything he's done...but like. it does suck.

-vlad being so sure danny wouldnt help him he made it somehow contagious to his friends to make sure he'd get help? danny is a nice boy, he wouldve helped if it was anyone else. the only reason he wouldn't have is because of the shit vlad did to him, on purpose. vlad 100% dug his own grave by being the biggest asshole, so it is very hard to feel bad for him.

-clockwork is back!!! and making danny learn lessons The Hard Way. Uhhh, okay. I kind of get Danny’s logic, that time traveling this far back would prevent vlad from becoming a halfa also, ergo no arch nemesis or ectoacne to worry about. But the fact that was basically the first solution Danny came up with to solve this problem is actually so funny. It’s so extreme

-APPRICIATION FOR THESE 80S LESBIAN BG CHARACTERS.

-vlad telling maddie in the lab (in the 80s) he has something he's wanted to tell her 'for a long time'...how long have they known each other? I assumed they met in college, since jack always calls vlad his college buddy/roommate, so jack and vlad for sure met in college, but did vlad know maddie longer? thats surprising if so. Tho we don’t know what year of college they’re in so they could mean they met as freshmen and a few years have past…speaking of maddie shes crushing the 80s look.

-vlad blames jack, but. maybe dont stick your face 2 inches from the portal??! THIS FEELS LIKE LAB SAFETY BASICS. IF SOMETHING HAS POTENTIAL TO BE DANGEROUS, DONT GET NEAR IT. WITH YOUR FACE UNPROTECTED IN ANY WAY. (altho jack didnt really give a Big Warning besides screaming BONZAI. so. also that, but cmon.) also, they need gloves, goggles, and to pull all of their hair back tbh. but fuck lab safety, I guess!

-cryyyyinnng at how lazy they were with jack's ghost form design, its just plasmius' design on jack!!! you couldve given him his own design!!

-there. I did that in about 10 minutes and its somehow less lazy than what made it into the show. embarrassing! better yet, I think the episode would've been better if maddie would've gotten the ectoacne. or maybe its just me, wanting to see her design! anyway. I'm sure people have already done redesigns of them both as halfas. I have to go look after I finish this watch through. Also mildly frustrated jacks resentment and bitterness is basically also a copy paste of vlads backstory. They’re different characters, I really don’t think jack would stew in bitterness and jealousy the same way vlad would!! I also don’t think he’d give up after one time of trying to hunt ghosts and getting laughed at. Our canon timeline says different…I dunno, I get it was for laughs, but I’m annoyed because the POTENTIAL this plot has…

-did vlad really wear a stupid cheese hat to his wedding. ok actually that kinda rules. and the cheese door knocker. the dairy-only buffet table. vlad still got rich, just on being the New Dairy King. (Assuming that means he owns a lot of dairy businesses?) ok! this actually is great. hope maddie isn't lactose intolerant!

-'no matter how hard I tried, I could never get rid of my ghost half, the half I knew Maddie could never accept' ohh, ouch, what a horrible thing to say to her HALF GHOST SON. 'YOUR MOM WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU' BASICALLY.

-maddie strapping danny to the table with a lazer pointed at him in a secret lab she keeps from vlad that she makes a point of saying is sound proof so he can scream all he wants...CHRIST. DANNYS POOR PYSCHE.

-also, not to feel bad for alternate vlad (because, he did lie to maddie saying jack blames her and never wants to see her again...) but. being married to a woman 20+ years and she immediately goes back to jack? if she didnt love vlad and feels like she had to hide shit from him, and says she wasted her best years with him, WHY MARRY HIM. it feels like leading him on!!! cannot believe im feeling bad for vlad, but. this alternate timeline vlad is significantly Less Horrible than Our Vlad. did she not think she'd get funding for her ghost stuff? (which, fair assumption since they're considered 'ghost fanatics/nuts in canon...but...) why did she think jack or vlad would be her ONLY OPTIONS? be like your sister. be single. Actually, this au could’ve been really interesting if after the accident, vlad lied to her and said jack never wanted to see her again, but she stays single. Imagine how much that would bug vlad… like, in her mind, it was never a competition it was jack or no one type situation…

-danny being like 'leave him ALONE' this jack is a HOMEWRECKER, DANNY. let them go to court and settle this at the least. ...or just throw vlad into the portal. (100% human, defenseless vlad) CHRIST, MADDIE THATS BRUTAL. THATS MURDER.

-danny seeing his mom immediately accepting him and his dad being half ghosts in this universe, if I was him this would be a great sign that his universe's maddie would also.

-*maddie voice* "clockwork will help!" *2 seconds later, with clockwork* "I will Not Help." TOUGH LOVE KING. YES LET DANNY SEE THE SODA HIMSELF AND DEVOLP BETTER OBSERVATION SKILLS.

-when clockwork ""reset time to the way it was"" just before danny "meddled"" ...did he really erase a whole alternate timeline? ...damn. because maddie and danny both called it an alternate timeline by name, it splitting when the college incident went different, so it wouldnt have really mattered if he reset it, right. like because danny's timeline is on a different stream? why didnt clockwork just. show danny a replay and not Reset That Timeline. wh...I wonder how many people that Erased From Existence. Anyway! once again stating clockwork is casually terrifying!

[getitinbusan]

Only Love Can Hurt Like This -4

Im Jaebeom - Angst

Y/N doesn't want a relationship, especially not with an idol. Jaebeom only wants her.

Love after heartbreak and all the things that fall in between.

Angst, Cheating, Fluff, Smut

A new series inspired by lyrics, each chapter has a specific song that goes with it.

Chapter 1: Nice To Meet Ya

Chapter 2: Blood In The Cut

Chapter 3: Liability

Chapter 4:

Chapter 5: Only Love Can Hurt Like This

Chapter 4: That's Just The Way You Make Me Feel

You keep on asking me the same questions (why?)

And second guessing all my intentions

You've got the answers to my confessions

You know I love it, so please don't stop it

So real, so good, so fuckin' real

The way you make me feel Janel Monae. 

He knew he fucked up and he didn't know what to do about it. He'd finally made some headway and now he was back to square one. 

So, the next day he was back. Standing in front of your counter he held out a cup of Hotteok.

Before he could speak you jumped in, "See JB, the way this whole retail thing works is, you pick something you want that I'm selling, then give me money for it. Nowhere in the scenario do you bring me random shit just because."

Your eyes were red, he felt terrible, after only 2 conversations he'd already managed to hurt you. 

"It's not random shit, it's an apology. I'm sorry I drew attention to you last night." he paused, "you don't deserve to be attacked like that." 

You turned away trying to gain your composure, "The one thing I've learned through all this is to never apologize for showing your feelings. When you do, you're apologizing for the truth." 

You looked back, "I've never apologized for loving Yoongi, because it was real whether people want to believe it or not."

You sighed, "You didn't do anything wrong. You didn't put the target on my back JB it's been there a while, I'm just sad because now you've got one too." 

His heart sank when he realized that you weren't choosing loneliness to protect yourself, you were keeping your distance so he wouldn't get dragged into it. 

He placed his large hand over yours as it lay on the counter. "There's only one thing that's going to make me walk away from you." He tipped your chin so you were forced to look into his eyes, "Tell me you don't want me here." 

The door chimed, you were no longer alone.

"Like I said yesterday, it's bad business for me to chase away customers, stay as long as you want."

He smiled brightly, "That's not a no." 

Taking the Hotteok from the counter you were still unsure, but he was right, it wasn't a no. 

………………………

Standing at the bar in the exact spot you'd met him, you'd hoped he'd be here tonight. You felt like a desperate fool with a schoolgirl crush.

Three days had passed since you'd last seen him and despite your best efforts, you found yourself missing him. You hated the way your heart hurt, of course he'd given up why would this be a surprise? 

A hand reached around placing a drink on the bar in front of you. "You look like you could use this, still pining over Min Yoongi?" 

"Actually I'm waiting for a friend Minho." 

"I could be your friend tonight Y/N. I guarantee I can get you to stop thinking about him," he grabbed your ass. 

"No thanks, I don't think 5 minutes in your bed will change my world."

He grabbed the drink back, "No wonder he cheated on you, you're such a bitch." 

Dumb, Dumb, Dumb...you'd let your guard down and everything was feeling all too personal. Shooting back the last of your Soju you grabbed your jacket and made for the exit. 

"You're not leaving when I just got here?"

Your traitorous heart fluttered, "I didn't know I was supposed to be waiting." 

His grin got bigger, "Are you mad because maybe you actually missed me a little?"

Mad, sad, who could tell them apart anymore? 

"Yeah, actually I am and I'm livid with myself for it." 

He put his hand on your waist, "Hey, I'm sorry, I got called for re shoots."

His thumb rubbed over your hip soothingly, "I only have your work number...I just got back and I was hoping you'd be here" 

A voice shouted from across the bar "Don't waste your time on that one JB, come sit with us"   

You closed your eyes trying to keep the tears at bay, "You heard the man. I'm leaving anyway, I guess I'll see ya around."

Shooting a look at Minho he ran out the door to catch up with you. 

Standing at the curb waiting for a cab he reached his hand out to you. "I wanted to be with you tonight, and I'm pretty sure you wanted to be with me. It's still early, let's go somewhere okay, can we still do that?" 

Placing your hand in his, "Only if we're alone...and there's alcohol."

He smiled victorious, "I think I know a place." 

Walking up the crowded street you felt better, anonymous. He kept squeezing your hand making sure you hadn't slipped away.

"Right here," he stopped in front of a pink neon lit Karaoke Bar. 

"Karaoke? I think one of us has an extremely unfair advantage JB." 

"Don't worry I'll let you win." 

Stepping closer to him you kissed his cheek, "Why are you being so nice to me JB?" 

"Y/N, why do you keep questioning my motives?"

His hand ran up your arm, "I hate that you've been mistreated for so long that you don't realize what normal behavior is."

He held the door open for you, "How's a private room and bottle service sound?" 

................................

You consumed copious amounts of Grey Goose as you took turns performing for one another. What you lacked in vocal talent you made up for in your ability to mimic choreography.

"I think I've lost my voice," you shouted after your efforts to sing Itzy's Wannabe.

"I'm going to have to tell JYP about you, maybe with some training you can debut next year and come on tour with us," he laughed.

He queued up the next song, "Come here, I want to dance with you." 

You moved into his waiting arms and allowed yourself to surrender to his pursuits. His song came on and you laughed, "it's so cheesy Jaebeom-ah!" 

He sang anyway, 

Our love will lead the way for us

If the road ahead is not so easy

Like a guiding star

I'll be there for you if you should need me

You don't have to change a thing

I love you just the way you are

You let your head rest on his chest, his heartbeat was louder, more important than the words he was singing.

Glad he was holding you up, you felt a little drunk, a little in love and for once, you weren't going to stop yourself. 

He kissed the top of your head and held on a little tighter, "So does this mean you'll finally give me your number?"

You looked up at him nodding, locking eyes he moved slowly closer, lips almost touching ...until his phone went off.

He frowned, "Fuck, it's management. Sorry I've got to check in. Just stay in my arms ok?" 

"You're going to read texts over my shoulder? How romantic," you jibed, but you didn't break away. 

JYP: Dispatch has reached out to us for comment regarding a new dating scandal. They were tipped off that you were with Y/N at Cakeshop Night Club tonight and now they are outside of the Karaoke bar waiting for photos. We need to discuss your intentions immediately. A car will pick you up in 15 mins, wait inside for security. Do not leave the building together as it is still controllable speculation.

You could feel his body react to what he was reading, deep breaths, tensed muscles and finally pulling you in tightly. "What is it J?" 

"I've got to get you out of here, the press are outside" 

He handed you his phone, "add your number."

But JYPs text was still open and you saw every word.

You keyed in your info and switched it off before handing it back. 

You breathed deep, "You know, sneaking in and out of buildings is my specialty," You put your hand over his heart and gave a sad smile.

"Don't worry about me. I'm sure there's a back entrance, I'll just grab a cab home. If you go out the front they'll be too busy taking photos of you, they'll never notice me."

You tried to sound confident and uncaring so he'd do what was best but Jaebeom had his own plan. 

"Get your stuff, we're going out the front together." 

He pulled your hand through the bar and out the front door. Lights flashed as they took their photos for tomorrow's headlines.

Hailing a cab he leaned over and kissed your lips, "I'm going to call you as soon as I can okay?"

You weren't okay, your first kiss would be your last kiss. Your smile hid the stabbing pain in your heart, you knew it was over before it had started.

"Jaebeom," you called him back after he closed the car door behind you, "It's been a really great time."

He smiled and waved.

Getting into the companies blacked out Suburban he was happy, he was going to stand his ground.

He'd felt bad that your first kiss had been under these circumstances so he opened his phone to text you a quick apology.

Searching the contacts  he found your entry, "I'm sorry" with random numbers underneath. 

[iffyswriting]

ICE 2

With my forehead pressed against the wheel of my car, I took three big inhales each one for different unrelenting stresses.

Unwinding after my day made it easier to deal with going inside. Swiping up my phone I checked the time, knowing Daddy was probably waiting up for me.

11:12.

Getting to all my courage, I finally got out of my car and went inside my home, my father being exactly where I expected.

"Where you been?" He asked looking just as worn as me, his body limp in his big green reclining chair.

"I told you, I had practice. " I replied tiredly, dropping my keys into their porcelain pot.

"Janelle-"

"I already know what you're going to say and my legs hurt. Can talk in the morning?" He stared momentarily before waving me off, making my shoulders slump in relief. Walking towards the stairs, he cleared his throat making me turn around.

"You not gon' tell me good night?" Rolling my eyes with a tiny smile, I walked back over and placed a kiss to his cheek telling him I loved him. I walked down the stairs to the basement taking in my space.

Bouncing onto my bed I slid off my shoes my feet aching horribly. I  checked out the heels of my feet sighing at the bruises that lined them. Red and purple, red and purple as usual. I unscrewed the top off of my Vapo rub and swiped it onto my soles, letting it soothe my pain.

Flipping out my phone, I scrolled through it, pulling up some music for me to listen too.

SZA softly poured out of my speaker, Broken Clock's hypnotic beat floating into my ears as I laid down fully, curling up in my covers.I turned my music up a bit, letting it relax me further. I was so sleepy but my eyes wouldn't shut as I looked up at my ceiling tracing shapes with my eyes into my popcorn ceiling.

❄

"I have to be in this next competition," I told my coach, Simone. We either practiced early in the morning or late in the afternoon, to combat with both our schedules.

"What competition?"

"The one at the end of this month," I said in a duh tone. "I know you know about it. "

"And you know I'm going to be in it." She stood still before speaking.

"Do you think you're ready for it?"

"Of course I do!"

"Janelle, they not only judge off of skill but presentation and-" She started off looking everywhere else but at me and I tightened my jaw, my blood beginning to pump faster.

"I can get enough money for a decent costume."

"Can you?"

"I don't pay you to fucking degrade me, Simone." I spoke angrily sitting down on the bench stretching the shoestrings of my skates, tying them up tight.

"You barely pay me at all." I scoffed, snatching my guards off keeping my eyes on the other side of the stands.

"Then quit." She sighed her eyes softening as she looked me over, sitting down next to me.

"You know you'll have to tighten up."

"I will!"

"So that triple axel will be together by then?"

"Yes."

Hours passed and everything stayed the same.

Even with all my trying, all my attempts-I kept falling.  Hitting that ice felt like I was hitting a knife and I was repeatedly getting up just to stab myself all over again.

After my seemingly 100th try, I skated back to the bleachers needing to sit down and breathe. I gripped my seat trying to force the lump in my throat all the way back down, biting back any tears that blurred my vision.

"And you think you're ready." She said smartly, making my stomach twist into more knots.

"I am!"

"But you can't get this crucial part of you're routine together and you wanna throw yourself into an even harder competition!"

"I can do it sometimes!"

"Sometimes isn't guaranteed!"

"It's enough for me to keep going!"

"You're supposed to believe in me!"

"I'll believe when you try harder."

"All I fucking do is try!"

"Okay, Janelle." She brushed her hair back from her forehead and I counted each wrinkle, trying to focus on something else other than my burning anger.

"I think we're done for the day."

"Simone."

"We'll try again tomorrow." She spoke, set in her words. I didn't want to stop her because, at this point, I needed some space away from her.

It's so fucking frustrating.

I keep failing and failing and failing, yet I'm always expected to get back on my feet unscathed and ready for more action. I'm not this resilient person I'm putting on to be and it's becoming harder and harder each day to pretend I am.

Why can't I get it right?

I sniffle softly, my throat becoming tighter and tighter as the minutes ticked on mocking me.

"You not getting on the ice, today, Icey?"

I look back at the deep soothing voice, matching it to a handsome face.

A really handsome face.

He was much taller than me and leaned against the railing of the steps, his hands stuffed into his jeans pockets. He was clearly freezing, goosebumps running up the side of his arm. I'd become used to the cold, so much it was like a second kind of blanket.

His skin was stark against all the white that surrounded us, a dark brown that reminded me of hot cocoa- the juxtaposition being a beautiful contrast.

"What'd you call me?"

"Icey. I don't know your name, so I just made up a lil something." He paused before licking his bottom lip. "Hope you don't mind."

"I don't. What was your question?"

"Are you not going to get on the ice today?"

"I'm not feeling it right now."

"Damn, I was hoping to watch you." He sounded genuinely disappointed and I was a little shook, starting to chew on my bottom lip.

"You watch me all the time?"

"Not all the time-"He said quickly, kind of flustered, "I just like the way you move and the sounds- I guess you do your thing or whatever." He finished off, studying my features sheepishly.

"I don't know if you're trying to be nice-"

"I'm being honest." Chuckling, I couldn't help but shake my head at him.

"Well, thank you for that. That's the first compliment I've heard about my skating in years."

"You can't be serious."

"I am."

"If I could get out there and fucking hurl myself across a block of ice every day, everyone would see it and everyone would be respectin' me and my talent."

"You're making it sound so insanely impossible."

"Not everyone can do it. " He paused again slickly starting to smirk. "Not everyone can do it the way you do."

"Stop hyping me up, stranger."

"Amir." He said quickly, his name becoming locked into my head.

"Stop hyping me up then, Amir."

"Well Stranger-"

"Janelle." I said making him let out a breathy laugh.

"Well, Janelle- I'd love it if you tried again."

"I don't know."

"I think your discrediting yourself too much. I know your coach yells at you about how you fuck up on this or mess up on that but- you still look breath-taking. Like a real-life figurine but with passion and grace."

I blinked unsure of what to say or how to feel.  Standing up straight, I leaned on the rail and gave him a small smile.

"Okay, I'll give it another go. Maybe your seeing something I don't."

I stretched to touch my toes then put my arms outward, my pose before I began.

Starting off slowly, I did an easy figure eight, looping in a circle.

I was in the air for a couple of seconds before landing on my feet, my arms in the air as I kept my balance. I couldn't dwell long in my excitement as I launched into a toe loop, spinning the exact way I should.

His straight white teeth were on display as I stood still finished with my performance. He clapped loudly, whistling too as my own grin grew wide on my face.

"I knew you could do it!" He yelled, His support making my heart thump harder in my chest as I bounced up and down in place.

"I don't know what you did but-"

"I didn't do anything that was all you!"

He gave me another thumbs up from the door and then turns on his heels leaving me alone in the great big space.

I didn't know what to think, or how to feel.

Well, I felt good- confident even.

I started to skate again doing the triple axel once more and I wish Simone was here to see it.

See that I could do it.

He made me think about why I loved skating so much, why I had to keep this dream alive.

When I was younger, I used to spend a lot of time at my Grandma's house.

I didn't realize at the time it was because my father was unstable and he struggled to make things better for our little family.

At GiGi's house you could never expect but so many channels but on satellite, there was this one channel where figure skating was played regularly.

Little Janelle was captivated- it was the only thing that could keep me quiet because it was so beautiful and pristine. Princesses dancing on my screen, twirling on the ice in their gorgeous costumes and slicked up hair-dos.

None of these girls looked like me and I wanted to be one of them. I wanted to become someone

I expected my daddy to treat my dream as unrealistic but I didn't expect him to be as dismissive of it as he was.

When you're little you think that you can do anything and when you're supported in that, you keep aiming for stars beyond your reach.

My dad never had that philosophy. Aim for easy goals makes failure and heartache, not an option, so life goes smoother and you feel more settled.

I told him I wanted to be an Ice Skater and he told me I could clean the ice. I'd have an even better chance of working at the concessions.

You can only teach what you know, so I couldn't even be mad.

No matter what- I have to skate. I don't know if we've all got our destiny determined for us before we're born but I know that this one thing, I was always meant to do.

I know it's just a stupid sport but it's my passion and when you're so passionate about something you're willing to put your heart on the line consistently to see it through, you can't just abandon it when shit hits the fan.

Even when I fuck up, it's like I did it. I got a chance to fly even for seconds all on my own and when I come back down from my high still standing, it's a rush I refuse to let go of. When I succeed it only gives me more reassurance to keep going, never stop because there's a chance you're going to make it and people are going to know your name.

So no matter the circumstances, I gotta push as far as this skating shit will take me.

Because its the closet thing to a dream, I've ever wanted to be real.

@fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression @chaneajoyyy @bakarilennox @domdollass

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: I miss you Rio: Guarantee I miss you more Buster: State your case then Rio: 😍😍 Buster: That's a strong introduction, how are you gonna follow it through? Rio: 🤤🤤 Buster: I like the thread of your argument, I can't lie, but I still miss you more Buster: 'Cause a girl was flirting with me in the gym and after telling her all the ways she doesn't compare to you, how incomparable you are was, and is, all I could think about Rio: As much as I probably shouldn't encourage you to be rude to random girls Rio: I love that you do so Buster: She embarrassed herself long before I embarrassed her, reckoning she had a chance Rio: I know what you mean Rio: the stalker has been getting inventive today Buster: Tell me Rio: We're doing this whole project in comp sci about viruses and shit Rio: and they've sent a meant-to-be-creepy spam type email Rio: it's got attachments but Rio: I've not looked yet Buster: Send it to me, I'll open it for you Rio: I know it's unlikely they're that smart Rio: but what if it does have some computer-killing 👾 attached? Buster: Smart enough that we haven't worked out who they are yet Buster: but if it's a virus, I'll buy another laptop Rio: it seems ridiculous Rio: this proves it has to be someone at school now, at least Rio: it's not like I've posted about my fucking homework anywhere Buster: How big's that class? Buster: Can discount my sister and your brother already, like Rio: Don't Rio: you're about the only person I've not thought it could be at my craziest Rio: probably about 30 odd though, standard Buster: Baby, they're the crazy one and I'm not letting them drive you even slightly close to the edge Buster: Who do you know and who don't you, percentage wise? Rio: I thought I knew everyone in this school, this town Rio: you'd think if someone was as creepy as this, anyway, that you'd know, they'd fucking stick out a bit but no Buster: It ain't a film, there's no creepy music playing to give it away Rio: if it was, it'd be dragging Rio: time for the resolve and happy ending Buster: Yeah, I know Buster: You wanna try calling that helpline again? Rio: Maybe Rio: I just wanna talk to you Rio: that's more helpful Buster: It's the least bullshit lead we've had for ages, I'll find a way to narrow it down more somehow Buster: We've got an obsession with you in common, it'll be me who figures it out if any cunt can Rio: Yours is the only one I need Buster: If you need to stay here for a while I'll sort it with my parents, yours, school, whoever Buster: You know that Rio: I know Rio: it's more and more tempting to not leave every time I go Buster: I just want you to be able to take an actual deep fucking breath Buster: Like you said, the amount of time this has been going on is ridiculous Rio: I can forget about it, most of the time Rio: but it's when something new happens, unexpected Buster: I'll kill him when we work out who it is Buster: 'Til then, stay with me Buster: He never does fuck all when you're here Rio: At least that's quick Rio: too nice if anything, babe Rio: always say that about you Buster: It don't have to be quick or nice Buster: Don't underestimate me, babe Rio: 🤤🤤 I rest my case Buster: I love you, that rests mine Buster: I'd do anything for you Rio: I love you so much Rio: I'd definitely be crazy without you, stalker or otherwise Buster: There's a fair chance I'd be stalking you too if things were any different between us Buster: I'd leave better presents though Rio: and I'd know it was you always Buster: 'Course Buster: I'd want you to know Rio: hence there's no world in which we ain't a thing Buster: [has bought her the most expensive and best ever anti virus software and all that jazz so sends her the deets like there you go] Rio: this really has everything Rio: thank you Buster: He ain't gonna be smart enough to get through that, I've been reading reviews since you told me Buster: And I have it too now so you don't have to worry about sending me whatever bullshit he does to you Rio: We can open it together then? Rio: [I think it shouldn't be camgirl moments but something @school to drive that home] Buster: Yeah, on the count of three Rio: [just some creeper shots all throughout the day up until that lesson] Rio: these are today, I'm 99% sure Rio: I swapped my bag Buster: Forget going there tomorrow, I'm booking you a flight here instead Buster: I'll think of a lie to tell my parents if you still don't want anyone else to know the truth Rio: there was always the possibility Rio: but now I know it's someone I really see in person Rio: every day Rio: jesus Buster: I meant what I said, I'm gonna find out who, whatever it takes Buster: I know it feels fucked, but it's good, that it's one of 30 classmates rather than the numbers of lads who watch your streams Rio: it's true Rio: but those lads could be anywhere in the world, not in the same room as me Buster: Which is why you shouldn't be in that room until we know which sick cunt it is Buster: Just give me some time, it's not like I don't have the money to throw at it Rio: I couldn't be there if I had to Rio: I don't even want to be here at home now Buster: How soon can you be at the airport? Rio: not for a while Rio: I mean, tonight, maybe Rio: what should I tell my mam? Buster: Tell her I'm having a breakdown, it wouldn't be the first time Buster: I'll trash the house for realism if it comes to it, like Rio: it'll keep her from being worried Rio: pissed off is fine, I'll deal with that when I can Buster: Exactly Buster: And Ava's at a friend's so I don't have to worry about scaring the shit out of her with my acting Buster: 'Cause it'd be stupid not to feed my parents the same lie Rio: You don't have to go that method Rio: but I wouldn't blame you Rio: I'm trying to keep my freak out internal because I'm looking after the twins and your sister is on her way Buster: I'm glad you're not on your own, even if the company is Nance Rio: I was kinda hoping someone took the homework too seriously and was pranking the whole class Rio: but nah, the email was more specific than I let on to her, of course Rio: even before the pictures Buster: 'Course you were Buster: He'd been quiet for a while Rio: really think he'd get bored at some point Rio: I never react, respond, everything they tell you Buster: Now isn't really the time for me to reiterate how stalkable you are again when I can do better with compliments Rio: the fact you can make me smile even at this time Buster: I can do better than that too, I'll make you forget about it Rio: yeah? Buster: Yeah Rio: I need that Rio: my head is all over the place Buster: You've got it, and whatever else you need Rio: I only feel really safe when I'm with you Buster: You are safe with me, but you won't have to leave until you're also safe everywhere else Buster: I'm gonna fix it Rio: yeah Buster: I know I've said it before but this time I swear Buster: He fucked up by giving us a decent clue Rio: it does narrow it down Rio: even if it isn't the class, and it's just the school in general Rio: that's the most we've ever had to go on Buster: Exactly Rio: but what do we do Rio: if we work it out Buster: I told you, I'll kill him Rio: so you're the only one that ends up in prison Buster: I'm not a fucking amateur, babe Rio: mm Rio: 🙄😏 Buster: Hilarious Buster: Nance will be a way more receptive audience though Rio: yeah, really in the mood for this study sesh now Buster: I can easily change hers if you wanna get out of it Rio: nah Rio: I need to keep things normal Rio: only just invited her over, it'd be weird to change my mind Buster: You can blame me for that as well, I don't give a shit Rio: I can't leave yet, like you said, distraction is probably a good thing Buster: Alright, what can I do to make it a more bearable one? Buster: [loads of her fave things getting delivered to this gaff like don't be scared to answer your door, look they are all from me, here's the order confirmations] Rio: I don't deserve you Buster: You don't deserve the bullshit he's putting you through, you've always deserved me Rio: I feel like I should just Rio: stop the streams Rio: I know you aren't meant to change your lifestyle and habits for them but it wouldn't have happened if I weren't doing that shit Rio: I know you aren't meant to change your lifestyle and habits for them but it wouldn't have happened if I weren't doing that shit Buster: Fuck that, we know he's from school Buster: Being able to see you every day pre-dates anything you've done online Buster: He could've known you since primary Rio: I guess Rio: but would he be bothered if there was less out there to stalk Buster: It's not your fault, Rio Buster: It can happen to anyone, you know that Rio: it's happening to me though Buster: Not 'cause of anything you've done Buster: Come on Rio: anyway Rio: I'm gonna enjoy all these treats Buster: Good Rio: how much should I bring? Rio: when I pack Buster: As much as you want, I'll send you money for if your cases are over the weight limit Rio: don't want it to look like I'm running away too hard but Buster: You're overthinking it, you never travel light anywhere, nobody'll notice Rio: I need options Buster: I'm not mad about it and I don't care if my parents are Rio: they're going to be Rio: you'll have to go to school, be 😇 to show I'm totally not a distraction Buster: You are, but I'll still go Buster: All that matters to me is that you feel safe Rio: I will do Rio: and I'll find ways to be useful to them as well as distracting to you Buster: Winning over Ava is basically the same thing as winning them over Buster: You've had loads of practice at that Rio: kids are easy Buster: She's easier than Grace, obviously Rio: wouldn't take much on Ava's part Rio: bless Buster: She'll be distracting at any rate Rio: I can take her to school and shit, free up some time for them Buster: Yeah, and once you've had some time, we can sort out getting your assignments and shit sent over Rio: I won't miss anything important Buster: It'll be fine Buster: I'll make sure it's fine, like Rio: I know you will Buster: You gonna facetime me into this study session or what then? Rio: depends Rio: are you going to be nice? Buster: To you Rio: well you're always nice to me Buster: Are you asking me to help Nance with her homework? Rio: how much do you think she'd appreciate that? Buster: She wouldn't, so of course I'll do it Rio: I can't with you two, honestly Buster: You love me, you don't even want her to come over Rio: I'm not getting in the middle of it Buster: You already are Rio: No I'm not, shh Buster: It's okay, I know you're on my side Rio: I love you more than anyone else in the world Rio: goes without saying Buster: I still really like hearing it Rio: You know you can hear it any time you want Buster: Is she there yet? Rio: nope, you remember how long that drive takes, even in an uber Buster: I'll call you then Rio: 🥰 Buster: [does obvs] Rio: I'll just be here counting down the minutes 'til you can hold me Buster: However long it feels, you'll be staying longer Rio: promise? Buster: I swear Rio: then I'm happy Buster: If you are, I am too Rio: I haven't even asked you how your days been Rio: I'm so rude Buster: Before and after I shot down gym girl there ain't much to report Rio: what did she look like? Buster: Every other girl in this postcode Rio: Blonde and skinny Buster: Yeah Rio: vaguely equine, dresses more like a nan than nan ever would Buster: I'll have to remember all that for the next one Rio: I can tell her myself if you like Buster: If you like Rio: Me? The jealous type? Buster: The jealous type and my type Rio: I better be Rio: only type Buster: You're the only one I've ever wanted or will ever want, you definitely don't need to add that to the list of shit that's worrying you right now Rio: I just like to hear it Buster: I'll tell you again then, I want you so much Rio: even without all this bullshit Rio: it's been too long Rio: I hate every second I'm not with you Buster: I know, me too Buster: I'm not gonna say he's done me a favour, but I am glad you're coming to stay Rio: I'll say it Rio: may as well get something good from it Buster: I'd rather you didn't have to deal with any of this bullshit, obviously Rio: of course Rio: I told you, I've never thought it was you, it's okay Buster: It's not okay that I haven't been able to do fuck all about this though Buster: I'm sorry Rio: Don't Buster: It's not good enough, I know that Buster: I'm gonna do better Rio: Stop it Buster: I mean it, Rio Rio: we've done everything we can Rio: it's not fair on me or you to act like we haven't Buster: I just hate this Rio: I know, baby Buster: You're the best thing that's happened to me, this shouldn't be happening to you Rio: It really could happen to anyone Rio: it's shit Rio: but you make me feel safe, that isn't nothing Buster: I'll calm down before you get here Buster: I swear Rio: you don't have to Rio: you can be mad, I am Rio: but you don't need to blame yourself, even if it's second to him, it's all on him Buster: I am angry but you've got the wrong twin if you reckon I'm willing to make any of this about me Buster: I'm here for you Rio: Trust me, I know Rio: she seems distracted herself recently Buster: Yeah? Rio: I'll try to work it out, not had time yet Rio: she won't say anything if you're on the phone though Buster: I don't have to be, if you wanna do some investigating Rio: I know you wanna know too Buster: I know if you get her started she'll talk about herself until you've gotten all of your own bullshit exists Rio: and you're a little nosy too, you can admit it Rio: I'll get the gossip Buster: She's still my sister Buster: 'Course I wanna know if she's being stalked as well or whatever Rio: You're cute Rio: and I do not think it's that Rio: obviously Buster: You know what I mean Rio: I do Rio: that's why I wanna know too Buster: Okay, tell me when you do Rio: 🧐 Rio: wouldn't suit the hat Buster: You'd suit anything, don't lie Rio: 😊 Rio: I mean if that's your thing I'll do my best Buster: If it was that wouldn't be the first you've heard of it Rio: be mad if it was Rio: you have to tell me exactly what you like so I can be it Buster: You are Buster: And I don't have, or want to have, any secrets from you Rio: secrets are boring Rio: and hard to keep Buster: Neither of us could ever be boring Buster: And I'll do whatever it takes to keep you forever Rio: You've got me Rio: not going anywhere Buster: Only closer to where I am, not further away Buster: Soon as your mum is back and your study session is over Rio: not that I need to do this homework now Rio: just be throwing subtle hints at Nance instead Buster: Be fucking typical her if she's getting bullied there as well Rio: I'd know if she was Rio: only have the two lessons with her but contrary to what the stalker suggests, I know most people well enough that they wouldn't Buster: Well Ava'll probably get a love life before she does, Christ knows what else it could be then Rio: ugh don't Rio: it's coming up with Edie for sure Rio: Jun is like Nancy and Billie isn't bothered thank god Rio: hate it Buster: Who's bothered about Edie then? Buster: Tell me your gossip Rio: It's just like the boys she hangs with are less useless stoner and more keep your eye on them types than Billie's friends Rio: and they aren't just friends types, I don't trust 'em Buster: Maybe I should be getting on a plane instead of you Rio: at least none of them are stupid Rio: especially not Eds Rio: have to hope anyway Buster: I've taught her how to protect herself physically, I reckon she can handle lads trying to get in her head Buster: Like you said Buster: She's no stupid kid Rio: Yeah, she has all the tools and advantages she can be given Rio: 💘 and hormones still make people stupid though Buster: I remember Rio: well yeah, ignoring the fact we'd be used as prime examples in that lecture Buster: Sure we have been, never too early for mum and dad to tell Ava what not to do Rio: As if we'll have started a trend Rio: if it wasn't you it'd be a really bad idea Buster: They should want her to have this, how I feel about you, how happy I am Buster: It's not as if they can actually judge us for who it's with Buster: This family are way past that Rio: You'd think Rio: I'm way past caring Rio: it was so Rio: I wasn't me without you Buster: I feel exactly the same, you know I do Buster: The only thing I've ever done wrong was not be with you, every bad thing I did or that was done to me can be traced back to that Buster: We're free now and this stalker isn't gonna make you feel otherwise any more, I'm not letting it happen for another fucking day Rio: we can get through anything, we've got the rest stacked against us and we're still strong Rio: as long as you love me, then there's nothing anyone can say or do Buster: I really fucking love you Rio: I love you Rio: endlessly Buster: [a flight he's booked her like this is happening no matter what excuse us fam] Rio: 🙏 Rio: I cannot wait Buster: Me either Rio: you can pick me up from the airport, right? Buster: Nothing could stop me Rio: Yay 🥰🥰🥰 Buster: You need me to help you with all that luggage Rio: it will be one suitcase Rio: and a sizeable handbag, thank you 😂 Rio: but I still need you Buster: I'll be early regardless Rio: you're the best Buster: No, I do my best, you don't even have to try Rio: You don't either Rio: but I will for you and I appreciate that you do Buster: I appreciate everything that you do Rio: you will Rio: that's the plan Buster: I do, whether or not shit goes to plan Buster: You're one of the strongest people I know, the least I can do is give you the reminder Rio: Buster Rio: it won't always be this dramatic, you know Rio: being together Buster: I don't care if it is, you're worth it Buster: And I'd endure the worst suffering I can possibly imagine to be with you if any alternative meant not being Rio: now you're just being hot about it on purpose Buster: I told you I miss you, nothing's changed Rio: I miss you all the time Rio: but I'm down for all the ways you make it worse Buster: [sends her a pic from when he was at the gym earlier like okay we're testing the waters but not very much yet lol] Rio: oh Rio: yeah, I would've flirted with you too Buster: What would you have said? Rio: Hmm Rio: ask you to check my form Buster: As long as you'd have time for how thorough I'd be, I don't have any problem with that Rio: Of course Rio: I'd ask you because you're clearly an expert Buster: And there's no need for me to hold back on my expertise as you're clearly so receptive to it, not to mention deserving Rio: Don't, I want you to show me exactly how you do it Buster: Never, I wouldn't wanna leave you with more questions than answers Rio: of course, but there are some things I could show you in return for all you're going to teach me Buster: Yeah? Buster: You've got yourself a deal, babe Rio: are you going to let me come to the gym with you really Buster: If you want to Buster: I'll try not to get too distracted at the prospect Rio: you look like that, obviously I want to Buster: [a pic of how he looks now like we can also stay in this bed where I currently am chilling] Rio: 🥺🥺 GIMME Buster: You're not meant to change your behaviour or habits for that cunt, remember Buster: Say please Rio: please Rio: please let me be in that bed right now Buster: [treat that gal to some more pics boy she's had a shit day] Rio: please be with me right now Rio: in me Buster: You know that's all I want Rio: you're perfect, Buster, you know that Buster: We're perfect for each other Rio: marry me Buster: As soon as we can, I will Rio: seriously Buster: I am being serious Rio: oh Buster: Once we're both 18 nobody can stop us Rio: yeah but Rio: nobody would come Buster: I only need you to turn up Rio: technically Buster: And actually, 'cause the rest of my family won't and like you said, I'm past caring Rio: if you were going to do it Rio: you'd want the big day, the venue, the clothes, the car Rio: everything proper Buster: If you were going to do it, you'd want your family there, you can say what you really mean Rio: we can't just do all that for two people Buster: We can do whatever we want Rio: I just wish people would be happy for us Buster: I know, I haven't properly asked you yet 'cause I want everything to be perfect for you and there's fuck all I can do to give you that Rio: it'll never happen, I know that Rio: I've accepted it, it's just hard to make total peace with Buster: There was a time when I reckoned we'd never happen Rio: yeah Buster: I don't care who or how many people I have to turn my back on for you, it'll never matter as much as us being together Rio: it shouldn't have to be like this Rio: it's bullshit Buster: Yeah, but it is, and I've made my choice Buster: You know the things I'd do differently and none of 'em are about not ending up here Rio: Me too Buster: Changing their minds is as likely as us changing ours, it's an old fashioned stand off, like Rio: True Rio: it's like, they forget they're meant to be anti-us sometimes though Rio: and it's just normal, like we're any other couple Buster: Maybe when we've has as many years as my parents, it will actually be considered normal Rio: you reckon? Buster: Worked for them Rio: I guess nan and granddad are sufficiently over it Rio: had competition though, didn't they Rio: don't think that's likely to repeat itself Buster: Fingers crossed Nance is hiding a dark enough secret to take at least some of my parents' attention nevertheless Rio: in your dreams, babe Buster: Why would I dream about her downfall when I could dream about your happiness? Rio: alright 😇 Buster: We're not married yet but in regards to that, what's mine is yours, babe Buster: And vice versa Rio: you know I want it too Rio: to be married to you, and have everything we want Buster: Then I'll make it happen, exactly how you want Buster: Where there's a will there's a way, yeah? Especially when it's my will getting involved Rio: I trust that Rio: you Buster: Good 'cause you can Buster: About this and everything else Rio: then that's settled Rio: and Nance is finally here Buster: I'll still be here if you need me Rio: 🧡🧡🧡 Rio: you focus on doing everything you possibly can before I get there so you can spend as much time with me as we've got Buster: Consider it done

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Uncle Donald gave her $800 in the 1980s

She let him invest it for her up until now

And she has now $45B

I hope you enjoyed your game as there are more to come but with more people as it enters TV for free of course on Channel Fox.

As always enjoy life and what it brings with the most care you can afford.

Don't let the economy, crumble, Uncle Donald, i hit up JP for some cash since Jesse stole mine from United Business Bank located in Oregon, Washington, and New Mexico.

I own Chase, bought it with Donald and sold to the US Government for a mint. Jesse could got in on this deal but he wanted to challenge me instead.

So I asked Uncle Donald for a cash loan, how much he could afford and what was in his wallet. $4000 roughly. So we split it between his 4 kids (the 4th being me) and I gave him back $200 for the rest of the day.

And we returned to the bank and I asked him how to deposit the money into Chase Manhattan because Denise had bought me clothes but I wanted to be a fashion designer and had altered them So she threw them all away in a rage of jealousy and heat.

Of course i started to cry so we went back across the street to McDonald's and we talked. He said "i have a surprise for you, lets get to the bank"

So we walked alllllll around the building, up and down and he talked to a man and got us inside all the back rooms. He said "i wanna buy it!" And he turned to me and asked "would you like to invest your $800 into my bank as an investor?"

I said "what about my clothes! She said i had to return the money or else i get none!"

"But who did she spend the money on?"

"Me and my brothers and and her!"

"Well don't you think Its time to invest in you and your fashion?" He asked for my $800 i had to pull from 4 different pockets and my sock as he taught me to split to beat pick pocketers. And handed it all. He handed me back $200 and I handed it back then he handed me a $5 from his breast pocket and t told me to keep it.

And began to walk to the counter to buy the bank.

I chased after him and put it in his left cost pocket and told him, 'well you know you bought me lunch so you keep it"

I pulled it from his pocket to produce proof I had already given it and he couldn't give it back and then stuffed it back in deep, all the way i nearly ripped his shoulder off for which I promptly apologized, jumped on the counter and rubbed his soreness off and jumped down.

And he started to cry a little bashful at first then a full sob. And I tried to console him and Robby appeared with a trailing line of toilet paper so his silk hanky wouldn't be soiled with snot.

He thanked him and became startled and asked if he wanted in on the investment.

Robby said, "i might but i need to talk to you, I belong to this boarding school ran by this might be soon white bigger as he calls himself, inspired by her and taken completely out of context"

"Michael Jackson" interjected our new found Uncle Donald. "Come let's sit"

We moved to the side of the spacious lobby to a small table accompanied by two plus club chairs.

He and i talked about how neat it would be to have chaise chairs in Chase bank.

"Well, her mom is abusive, mostly about money so i would like to take control of her stock with her permission"

"Yes! I do! And i will wanna get married!" I jumped with my fist in the air and pushed against the chair like a standing push up and stood

....

"Her sit. First I would like to talk to you as an investor. I am run by the boarding house and they teach us things like to steal and bring back to get 'rewards' much often things less than they are worth like a stick of gum for $2 when I can get a whole pack for 20 cents. Uh oh, here he comes"

"Im about to invest into this bank with these two kids you got something you wanna say to me?" Instead of waiting for a reply, uncle Donald got up and briskly walked to the counter, asking to return to a different room, promptly and away from Mr Jackson whom was still solidly black (he doesn't have vitaligo its just bleached).

And we entered a nearly empty office and he turned fiercely, angry even, "this will be your office where you will WORK"

...

"Its okay! We are still friends!" I climbed into the chair then up onto the desk "this is where I will sit"

"Well close your legs and sit like a lady, like this hand me your foot, no don't take off your shoe"

"Well I didn't want to ruin you! Your suit is NICE!!"

And he moved my foot and crossed my ankles and patted my knee and said "or you cross at here"

I took my ankle to my knee "no not like that, that's like a man. Knee to knee"

"Oh like this?" I squeezed my knees together

Robby laughed and Uncle Donald looked flustered

"Oh i know I know cross at my knees, you need to explain better!" I patted his shoulder. In the 80s it was okay to touch, at least for a child.

"I said that first!"

"Oh! I interrupt!"

"No apologize" Robby groaned

"I apologize for interrupting"

"For?" Asked Donald "you can't tell her that Because ---"

"No he could I get misinformation that way"

"Except when I'm being scolded and she knows the truth" said Robby.

Tune in next week for another Miss Adventure of one Wild Single Mom's Childhood!

I had 48 cents. Robby had put in 2500 front Hayes then 1500 each from Mark and Mike Andrews which he had not signed and they got rejected. Yet Jesse notified me of this, restricted my remote deposit privileges and now i am to notify the Sheriff of Hays County, Austin, Texas that the money is kept hidden in the tax and revenue accounts of his great county. And to open an investigation which he will pretend he did and then not. So i get his hush money as well as the other two and the $15B JP Dejoria stupidly just paid me because i Told Jesse to tell his father in law that Jesse is a stupid piece of shit which he didn't.

And of course I will invest in schools across the nation, installing playgrounds at any schools that do not have them, including intermediate, Jr high, middle, High and etc.. And may be finally lockers at least were I'm centrally located and/or where i want to be, namely at high schools at least.

Because that is what I want to do. Make people happy in the funniest ways possible.

And if there is any left I want to reinvest at the parks i originally invested in, initially, to make them better snd brighter, starting at the older to the newer.

I want the world to seem happier and brighter and in the case of schools at least around here once they hit 7th grade (middle school) they change schools to those that no longer have lockers or desks to put things in, 7 or more teachers to please instead of one or two they spend all day with, like a parent who gives love and kindness and retribution, they go through puberty which in itself is a chore. Then the kids riot. I've seen it in small schools and i know it happens in big ones. 20 in one week at the beginning of school less than a mile from my house where i can hear the school bell.

And so they need a place to sleep their weary heads like the shoulder of an old friend instead of weeping a soul they can no longer call their own.

The secrets i have included here broke my heart to where it actually stopped over and over.

Instead of asking what was wrong, Mr Moneybags Jesse sent me to the doctor alone. -.-

He could have provided me with what i needed like I provided and protected him from Ms Dejoria and Mark Hindberg, Afghanistan and Iraq, which I will no longer do.

He is the one that encouraged Michael Jackson to pickpocket the slaves he had created.

Yes Michael Jackson is Wacko, is Him and is burning in Hell because I killed him with my own pistol Jesse had stolen from a cop, altered and resold to himself at a cheaper price than the way over inflated price he created to create a deficit in his company to receive a refund from the US government's IRS Department in the amount of $8,000 instead of paying the $1M he owed.

I plead guilty before a judge and Uncle Donald, Mrs Katherine Jackson, the Anne my 4 year old daughter that Michael Jackson attempted to rape in front of me, as well as Robby, my true love and of course Sunny and Jesse James himself whom gave me the gun.

Then, before then President Barack Obama, i was exonerated and pardoned completely without the possibility of parole or any other misconceptions that would be included with self defense manslaughter.

This week total I have arrested a total of 19 men and women thanks to the CIA as an unpaid civilian.

That would guarantee me Presidentship of one really great country, now, wouldn't it?

Thanks. And not to be repeated: No more games. Only truth.

Until next time my fair weather friends!

Now! Let's grab the bookie!!! Snag! You're in jail. What did ya know, Mike Andrews, I knew all along that Mark Hindberg was FBI. Why didn't you think that?

Moving along, hi JP. How are you? No one cares. Good thing you trusted into your rapist daughter who was married to a true hero whom puts up with my shit even after we name him Mr Vomit cause I make him so scared he actually vomits like I did tonight (that's included. No more scare, only truth)

Oh yes, JP, you have already been arrested and so you know -- you have no guns with you, right? Alexis Dejoria is no rapist, she's actually an excellent FBI agent whom hates her dad and is included in any exonerations I may have to hand out butbat my leisurely pace, because she actually didn't rape anybody!

Also the US government will pay your wages as you did file a lawsuit this very week by signing up with Namus.gov like we all did.

She like me, was an unpaid civilian whom ran into luck. While she's smart, she's not smart like me. Thus she's the FBI vs me who is CIA and can work against the world in a millisecond as i usually do and have in Afghanistan and Iraq where i protected many NHRA members during their tours in the US Military while they served with Jesse James and my little brother and were even kidnapped thanks to Matt Hagan's temper tantrum and Jesse James refusal to listen to command. Eventually I saved them from that too in a day and 6 hours after leaving base. They were involuntary bound and gagged and beaten within 20 minutes of their capture. Within the next 20 when I was finally told of their status they were rescued by Tony Schumacher and his team.

And now i have saved the NHRA from being beaten and raped and tortured. My time to continue here at home is not wasted,

I love you all and thank you very much for listening...

And now i have something to say about Jesse since i made him puke from a lie via email Because he made me mad for being a Dick douchebag and not caring enough about me, not wrecking his motorcycle and then lying to make me feel bad and stupider than ever although I saw the wreck and my being a girl, up and President running, couldn't stop to rescue or assist a man on his feet whom had already picked up his bike after a wipe out and the trailer passed me up to show me he would assist because forgive those trespassers as we trespass ourselves and i care that he could really been hurt. That may be a fault of mine but it is called Grace and not salvation which is being my daughter reincarnated into a goat in Iraq to keep everyone safe because Jesse is a dumb dumb sometimes and Matt Hagan prefers truth over himself, sometimes. Like being in love with a goat of my daughter's soul, in Iraq. (I bet he fucked her, too. Bestiality freak. Not my business tho, nor yours. But still, let's laugh instead of poking fun at his misadventures. It is funny, yo!)

Jesse cared about the goat so much he listened to her over every one, even me. Because he believed she was closer to God where he needed to be..

I changed his life once in Alabama and several times then, over and over, any time that need be.

But finally for this one time he trusted somebody else and learned to love as much as he could, the soul inside of him.

So God bless to all of the two headed creatures we will see wandering around the backs of people at the NHRA in the future to come. Including even on me.

I'm Mrs Cougar cause of my fingernails and my desire to be with someone young to keep me fresh and Alive -- not by his blood byt by the life he gives me. And he will be Mr Snake the one who slithers up beside me only for love while I labor in the grass kicking myself for what i might have done but not for what i might have missed out on because I was there the whole time thinking and feeling and frolicking through the grass, same as me.

And of course my tattoo will be scary cause the world as I know it, very much can be.

And you can thank me for the past or you can think about the future and beyond!!!

[kubrik-was-a-c-nt]

I have a bit of a dissenting opinion on the issues surrounding the Mario movie, but I feel like a few things have to be said.

There are certain types of movie that are notorious for not doing well at the box office, two of those are musicals, and video game movies. When a studio decides to tackle one of these things, they will often cast big names in acting to star in order to bring in as many ticket sales as possible. For example, people wouldnt have been as interested in seeing the Les Miserables movie if they heard that Norm Lewis would be playing Javert (as hes completely unknown to mainstream audiences), but the fact that they cast Russell Crowe in a role that required him to sing all his lines made people curious.

This is a big reason why professional voice actors are often passed over for movie roles: if they arent a mainstream actor, production companies believe that they wont bring in audience numbers like live action actors do. If the average person cant immediately recall seeing another movie that person was in, they're not worth putting in a movie. That's why Scarlett Johansson was in a lot of movies in a short amount of time, because she was in a few big hits recently and was likely to bring in more audience members who didnt even care about what the movie was about, they just wanted to see her. She got Ghost in the Shell for this exact reason, despite there being a ton of Asian actresses who could have been the lead, her face was everywhere and would bring the best numbers.

Chris Pratt has done a lot of recognizable work and is now a well recognized actor, so it makes sense that in order to put a lot of star power into the movie the executives at Illumination put him in as the top billing. They're trying to cast a wide net to bring in audience members who dont even know anything about Mario to watch it.

That's the issue with movies like that, marketing is a HUGE factor for the opening weekend and big names need to be put to a project. I bet you most people on this website didnt know Charles Martinet's name until the voice casting was announced for this movie. And that's also true for most voice actors, they're job is so sound different for every character so you're not supposed to recognize then (unless you're Vic McNuggets). Its natural that no one thinks about how the animated Joker has the same voice as Fire Lord Ozai, or how Timmy Turner is also Harley Quinn.

I guarantee you that if they cast everyone with regular voice actors, the box office wouldn't be as big as casting everyone with recognizable stars. Ticket sales would primarily be children and gamers, which aren't the biggest audiences to shill to.

I also feel like people are giving this movie the same treatment as the Aladdin live action movie did, they saw one picture of Genie and freaked out. Little did they know that Will Smith would carry that whole movie. I'm not saying Chris Pratt is going to be fantastic and you're all being mean, but we've heard very little of him as Mario as of yet. He does deserve the criticism of being a shit person, that's a completely different matter. And Illumination should have thought twice before casting him considering some recent controversies involving him.

But I do want to state that I am aware of the issues voice actors face, particularly the stunt Crunchy Roll pulled. They do not receive the credit (or pay) they deserve and need to be taken more seriously than they are. Voice acting can be a make or break part of a movie/TV show/video game/whatever, and all that hangs on these peoples shoulders. If companies want to make a quality product, they need to treat the voice actors who work with them with respect.

Tl;dr, hollywood casts big names to make money, chris pratt might make an ok mario but hes still a jerk, voice actors need to be paid more

Also Jack Black was so good as Bowser, i wouldn't have recognized his voice if i didnt know ahead of time!

[summerwritesfics]

🎧Song Inspired Shorts - Right Woman

Pairing & Characters: Cassie Cage/Kira, Kano Length: 922 Words Rating: Mature Content/Warnings: Stripper AU, Lap dances, using sex as a distraction, implied shady dealings Song: Right Woman - Dragonette

Song Inspired Shorts Masterlist

Oh baby, Don't you worry this tramp's a lady and, Gentleman come in every kind, So come and get me two, Cause I can't guarantee it, You'll be the right guy and next time you'll want the right woman

It was meant to be an easy job.

Kira would show up to the strip club, she'd demand the money the owner owed Kano, if he paid up she'd leave and if he didn't she'd kick the shit out of him as a warning.

Oh it was so meant to be an easy job. In and out. No fuss.

So why the hell was she sat on a plush seat with one of the strippers straddling her lap?

If Kira didn't know better, she'd think that the owner had seen her come in, and requested this young woman, apparently named Cassie, to distract her. If Kira didn't know better she'd say it worked.

She really wasn't sure where she should be looking. The bubblegum pink bikini Cassie wore left very little to the imagination. Cassie was quite a bit taller than Kira, so when sat on her lap Kira was basically face to face with Cassie's amble bosom. She knew, really, that if she wasn't meant to be looking at them, Cassie wouldn't be in this situation, and yet there was something so weird and dirty about it that Kira couldn't help but feel her face heating up.

“So, what brought you here tonight?” Cassie finally asked, rolling her hips slightly and getting a small “eep” from Kira's lips.

“Business,” Kira claimed, eyes switching quickly from Cassie's face to her tits. “I'm meant to be talking to your boss about... Business.”

“Ah, explains why he told me to intercept you.” Oh, that really was what was happening here. “Anything I can do to maybe change the outcome of this talk.”

Kira made a weird high pitched noise that not even she knew where it came from. “I mean... That's... That's not really up to me... But...” Kira paused. There was a part of her that wanted to put her hands on Cassie's waist but she really didn't know if that was crossing some sort of invisible line. “Sorry, I'm not entirely sure what the etiquette is here, am I aloud to touch you?”

“According to the club rules, no, but...” Cassie chuckled, reaching forward to brush a strand of Kira's hair out of her face. “Well...” Cassie paused and tilted her head smirking, “I think I can make an exception for you.”

“Oh.” Kira didn't actually move. Cassie giggled again, taking hold of Kira's hands and guiding them to her buttocks. “Oh.” Kira swallowed, looking up at Cassie. It was scary, and yet nowhere near as scary as she'd lead herself to believe. Actually this felt kind of good. “This... This is nice.”

“There's more where that came from,” Cassie spoke with a wink and Kira had to stop herself from visually swooning. “We can do more than touch, if you'd like.”

It took Kira a minute to realise what was meant by that. Somehow, she blushed even more. “I... Uh... I would like that...” Kira paused. “Is this part of your distraction or...”

“Not really,” Cassie shifted and lifted herself off Kira's lap, taking her hands again and pulling her up after her. “This is more, you're really cute and I wanna see if that blush goes all the way down.”

Kira.exe stopped working.

Cassie laughed again, gently looping her arm around Kira's shoulders and gently guiding her through the club. “Oh baby, don't you worry, this tramps a lady,” Cassie claimed and Kira slowly chanced moving her hand over Cassie's butt again. Cassie grinned when she did. “You've got the right woman.”

They went through a door out to the back for a little privacy.

Several hours later, Kira returned back to the Black Dragon's base to report on the mission.

“Mission went well, guy will pay by next week.” Kira shuffled at the odd look Kano was giving her. She just wanted to tell him the score and go, but she had a feeling that wasn't about to happen.

“Uh huh,” He replied, leaning on the desk and smirking. “Looks like you had fun with this mission at least.”

“What do you mean?” Kira questioned, trying her best to not get flustered as the memories of Cassie's hands and lips all over her flooded back.

“Kira.” Kano looked far too amused, and that was most likely a bad thing. “You realise your face is covered in lipstick stains right?”

Kira felt her face drop, as she went to touch her face, finding when she pulled it away there was remains of the pink lipstick Cassie had been wearing. She should probably have washed her face before coming back. Whoops.

“Guess it's a good job I have a few more job's I need doing around that place right?” Kano's smirk had evolved into a full blown grin now and Kira just wanted to find a large hole and drop herself into it.

“I'm not going to live this down, am I?” Kira asked, and Kano shook his head in delight.

“Absolutely not,” he claimed, clapping his hands together. “So, you want more reasons to visit there or...”

“If I could have more reasons to go there,” Kira said while pulling on one of her ponytails, “I would appreciate it.”

Kano laughed lowly as he finally gave signal that she could leave. It wasn't that much of a relief, this was definitely not going away any time soon. On the other hand, she would probably get to see Cassie again.

That felt worth a little embarrassment.

[justagayguysworld-blog]

It was a job and it paid well, very well. The work was easy enough, but the real money was in the tips. That's why I jumped at the chance to sign up for a second summer of sun and fun off the California coast. Far as I know, there were no gay cruises at the time, so I guess that made Tim's little operation ahead of its time with his mostly male clientele. The Wet Dream was a nice boat with three staterooms, a big salon, full kitchen, two baths and a big ass Jacuzzi. I certainly could have lived comfortably on it, which is pretty much what Drake and I did that first summer.

Our longest "excursions" were 24 hours up and down the coast, and many were just day or night trips. Basically, I was a waiter in a swim suit whose only job was to keep Tim's "A" list guests happy. Did a lot of them hit on me? Of course; I wouldn't have been doing my job if they hadn't. If we had a full passenger list of thirty, I could easily make five-hundred bucks in a day. And I'd never spent a single night in one of those staterooms with anyone. That's why when Tim called me to say Drake wasn't coming back, I thought he had to be the dumbest fucker on the planet. Drake was good looking enough, but obviously not real bright.

"Hey, Tim. I hope I'm not overstepping my bounds here, but I wish you'd give me a couple of days to see if I can find his replacement. Obviously I know the ropes, you're hardly ever there, and it would be great to work with somebody I know and trust who won't get all pissy like Drake."

"You were reading my mind, Robbie. Look around and get back with me in couple of days. I don't want to do a repeat of Drake either."

After I hung up, I had an epiphany of sorts. I couldn't remember a time when Brett had ever owed me less than a hundred bucks. His car was a beater and always needing something. He worked at that stupid beach bar when he wasn't playing volleyball and obviously wasn't making jack shit. Plus he had a killer bod and wasn't a complete asshole.

I called. "Hey, dude, what's up? I need to talk to you. Come meet me for a beer."

"Can't, Robbie. Waiting on the old man to get off work and take me to get an alternator."

"Call him back and tell him to blow it off. I'll take you. And fuck that fucking piece of shit car square up the fucking tailpipe. I'll see you in half an hour."

After a run to the parts store, we went for a beer or six. I told him about the job and the pay, the hours, etc; "The only down side for you in this deal, Brett, is you won't be getting much beach time this summer. It's a full-time gig, but on the bright side, if you work that fine ass of yours off, you'll be driving a new car this fall. So do yourself a favor for once, call Jackie and give her two weeks' notice. Good as she's been to you, she at least deserves that.

We start June 1st, and now that you owe me two fifty, I'm taking it out of your first check, asshole."

I called Tim back the next day. "You owe me big-time for this one, boss man. I managed to snag you a Laguna volleyball God. He has wait staff experience, the body of death and he isn't Drake. I'll bring him by the office in a couple of days. He's giving two weeks' notice at his job tomorrow, and he can start with me on the first."

I thought Tim was actually going to cry when I came walking in with Brett. And Tim is straight. After they'd talked and Brett did his paperwork, the boss said, "Let's do a trial run on the 29th. I've got some friends coming in town anyway, so we'll take a full crew and go out for the day."

Brett was a natural. Tim's friends loved him almost as much as Tim, and it looked like smooth sailing ahead. Two days later we went live with a guest list of maybe twenty five. One of the last to board was an actor and his "friend." They'd been with us several times, alone and together. But we had a strict policy of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell, and sure as hell, Don't Talk" about anything that happens aboard The Wet Dream.

"Isn't that...?" Brett asked.

"Yes, but like everyone else, he isn't here, and you did not see him."

"Didn't he just come out in that movie...?"

"Yes. Now put your tongue back in your mouth and go ask them what they'd like to drink. No autographs, either."

Then late Thursday night we were driving home. Brett said, "You know the guy who's some kind of a producer, the one with little round glasses and the ponytail? He tried to grab my ass this afternoon. I scooted out of the way and gave him the evil eye. I don't think he was even drunk."

"You're an idiot, Brett. Do you know who that guy is? Lighten up, dude. That little stunt probably cost you a fifty dollar tip. Looking like you look, do you really think Tim hired you for your bartending skills?"

"So, do you let them touch you?"

"Damned straight. Fuck, it's not like it's a big deal. How many times have I grabbed your ass? I know I've seen you grab a fistful of nuts at least a hundred times. If you wanna' make serious bank, you're gonna' have to play ball. And yes, the pun was intended."

He did seem a little more relaxed the next few days. We'd been on a 24 hour excursion until Sunday morning. People got really hammered, but it looked like everyone had a blast even if we were probably going to have to drain and power wash the Jacuzzi. I also made $425 in tips. Not bad for the beginning of summer.

I asked, "How much did you make?"

"$300. I would've made $400 if I'd let some dude blow me. He offered me a hundred bucks. I told him I was too busy. Does that ever happen to you Daddy Warbucks?"

"Sorry, I'm not having this discussion, Brett. You know the rules. What happens on The Wet Dream..."

"Stays on The Wet Dream. I hear you, Captain, loud and clear."

Because we'd been out all night, they needed to clean and restock Sunday. Monday was pretty sedate. It was only four hours and we were back by nine. I asked Brett if he wanted to grab some beer and go to the beach. We'd built a fire and were sitting there relaxing. Out of the blue, he pops off with, "I just don't want to freak out with some guy's dick in my, I mean my dick in his mouth. I need to try this someplace besides work first. If I went ape shit and decked some guy, I know Tim would fire me if you didn't. And I really want that car."

"Seriously dude? I know you must have some gay friends who'd love to suck your dick. I've seen it. They'd probably suck anything and everything you've got. Ask one of them if you'd like to get in a little practice.

Look at it this way. You carry some girl out to a decent dinner and a movie. How much does that set you back? Maybe forty bucks? Does that forty get you a blowjob or a date with your hand when you get home?"

"Sometimes I get lucky."

"Fuck luck. I'll take a guaranteed income anytime. I can't believe with that face and body, you've never even fooled around with another guy."

He started laughing. "Joey Gibbons did hunch my leg once in junior high. I smacked him pretty good."

I had to laugh at the image of that. "Brett, that isn't what I mean. Joey was a little porker who drooled and had asthma. Haven't you ever looked at some of the guys on the volleyball court and thought they were hot?"

"You mean like you?"

"Okay, sure. Like me I guess." Honestly, I really think I was only trying to prove a point. "So what if I put my hand on your leg like this and started rubbing up and down? Do you really feel like you need to smack me?"

"Maybe not if you kissed me first... I'm really serious, Robbie, I want you to kiss me." When he pulled me over on top of him, it didn't seem like he was joking.

"Okay, buddy. You asked for this." It was probably five minutes before either of us came up for air.

My brains were completely scrambled, but honestly I was considering doing it again when he looked at me and said, "More." An hour later, we took one last rinse in the water and headed home. On the way, he put his hand on my leg as we drove in silence. When I pulled up in front of his house, he didn't try to kiss me, but asked, "Next time, can we do this in bed? It's gonna' take me a week to get this sand out the crack of my ass."

I laughed and shook my head. "Next time?"

"Yeah, I think I could use more practice."