#and i DEFINITELY wasn't expecting to hear one of them say they didnt want to do something bc it was the part that was too long and too hard | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dotster001 · 2 years ago

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My first route was chevalier, i picked him because clavis wasn’t available. The only 3 that were available back then were chevalier,leon and yves so i went with chev since he was my fav out of the 3, i didnt expect to end up loving him so much. He was my favorite character in ikepri(with an eng route released) but that was until Clavis’s route came out. I have never loved someone as much as i love him. Clavis is just everything i like and want in a person and i just think hes the perfect mix of adorable and cool.i think me and chevalier never really get past the friends phase but i feel like i would really like to date clavis. I’m extroverted and bubbly,therefore it was much easier to get to know clavis. I feel like while reading chevaliers route i loved his character but i knew he wouldnt get along that well with me ,on the other hand, i knew me and clavis would actually enjoy being with each other much more. I’m not much of a prankster myself but i dont mind getting pranked and all that. I love people who can make me laugh and yet also let me feel comfortable around them. I struggle with expressing what i actually feel though, i usually just try to ignore them or joke about it so no one takes it seriously. Maybe this could be a fluff story where me and clavis find it in us to confess to each other and admit our true feelings.

(some people may say, she forgot that she was doing an event. And to those people I say, shut up. I hope you enjoy! Clavis is such a squishy boy, I can't even 😭)

A Tale Where Clavis and His Lover Finally Confess, and Chevalier is Tired

Chevalier was tired. He’d finally let someone into his heart to be a friend to him, and they were as much a simpleton as his fool brother. The signs were in front of both of you that you were head over heels for each other. Even if he wasn’t a genius, he could’ve seen it. He’d even tried to be a good friend and big brother, and point you both in the right direction. But so far…nothing.

He knew the problem too. Neither of you could express your feelings so you were waiting for the other to do it. It was exhausting.

To be fair to you, Clavis was prone to saying things like, “I know you are madly in love with me, so when we get married I'll definitely (fill in the blank with whatever ridiculous thought that day)" and "we've been dating for so long that, (fill in the blank)". You were bound to have difficulty believing any of it.

But to be fair to Clavis, he wasn't lying when he said those things. He genuinely believed what he said about being in love with you and planning to marry you.

Chev had tried his hardest to let you both handle things yourselves. He had watched from afar as you stared at each other when the other was looking away. He had sat in irritated silence as you both "fought" in his private library, the romantic tension between you both palpable.

But he was done. If his two simpletons (affectionate) weren't going to give in to their emotions, he would have to make them give in.

"Good morning King Highness! It is rare to see you up and at it so early! Why have you deigned to grace us with your presence?" Clavis had arrived at the office first.

"Sit, simpleton (derogatory)" Chev nodded at one of the two chairs.

Clavis simply wandered around the office, looking at objects like a cat deciding what to knock over.

You entered shortly after.

"Morning, Prince Chevalier, oh! Clavis! Good morning to you too!" Then your eyes went wide as you turned back to Chev.

"I swear, whatever he told you, I was in my room all night. I'm not his accomplice," you said hurriedly.

"Ah! You wound me," Clavis clutched his heart.

"Sit," Chev said again.

You were such an obedient little rabbit. He liked that. Maybe there was hope that you would rub off on his brother.

Crash

Or not.

With a heavy sigh Chevalier stood up, and simply left the room, locking the door behind him.

He could hear the immediate chaos; Clavis abruptly moving to pick the lock, and you standing up and asking what was happening.

He gestured to the men he had waiting in the room next door, and watched as they placed the heavy barricades around the door; the only things that would keep Clavis in.

He heard Clavis begin to swear, and you begin to shout, so he figured it was time for a hint.

"Figure out what I want and you can leave," and then he and his men walked away.

….

Once Clavis had realized picking the lock was useless, he had turned to you with a wicked grin.

"If he's going to cage us in here like animals, it's only fair that we act like them."

A chill went up your spine.

"What…what are you planning?"

Clavis picked up an object and, for the second time today, dropped it on the floor, shattering it. You flinched, knowing where this was going.

"Clavis," you hissed through your teeth.

He picked up a pot and dropped it while making direct eye contact with you. You flinched again, and he took that opportunity to put a framed picture into your hands.

"Come on, my faithful accomplice, do it."

You stiffened and adamantly shook your head.

He hummed and walked behind you. You didn't dare make eye contact. It would only encourage him.

He pressed himself against you from behind, placing his arms and hands over yours, his breath hot on your ear.

"Drop it," he whispered as he moved your hands.

The picture dropped, and just like that, you were an accomplice again. It didn't matter that you wouldn't drop anything else. It was enough for Clavis.

….

An hour in, Clavis had destroyed nearly everything in the office. The only things intact were the paperwork, the desk, and your chairs.

Now that everything was ruined, he was starting to eye you the way he eyed the rest of the office. You knew that look. He was getting bored and trying to decide how messing with you would entertain him. You knew that would accomplish nothing so you had to get him on track.

"What did Chev mean by "figure out what I want"?"

Clavis groaned and laid down on the ground.

"I don't know. He's too much of a genius for it to make sense to mere mortals like us."

"But," you hesitated, "he wouldn't lock us in here if he didn't think we could figure it out."

Clavis grunted something under his breath, before abruptly sitting up.

"The window!"

"Huh?"

"Stand back in the corner," he said, grabbing a chair.

"Huh?" You asked, more frightened this time.

"Stand in the corner," he said as he approached the window.

Figuring out what he was doing, you rushed to the corner and covered your ears, just as he swung the chair at the window.

With the glass shattered, he gave you a smug look. He approached and wrapped an arm around your waist.

He waltzed you both to the open window, and he proudly hummed, " Your handsome prince has saved you once again. I'll accept payment in the form of your adoration."

His smile suddenly dropped, and he whispered, "Damn it all to hell."

You looked down and saw Chev and a small army standing under the window, waiting for you both.

….

It was hour five, and Clavis was back to laying on the floor. He'd done a whole lot, while you tried to work out the riddle.

He'd thrown all the paperwork on Chev and his army. He'd disassembled the desk and put it back together in a meaningless blob. He'd attempted to get you to play cards with him. He'd formulated a new chemical mixture that he refused to say what it would do.

And throughout all of it, he'd brushed off your attempts, muttering something about how no one could keep Clavis caged. You were pretty sure he was getting cabin fever or something.

You were also worried that there had been a clue, but maybe he'd accidentally destroyed it.

"Clavis, I'm getting kind of hungry. Unless Chev has a hidden supply of snacks, we should probably solve the riddle now."

He lifted his head a little, and looked at you, before laying back down and pulling something out of his pocket.

"Here, you can have this. I'll be okay for a little while."

You retrieved the thing he was handing to you, and unwrapped it to reveal a bunch of crackers.

"I'd rather we split it," you said, feeling bad for taking what was most definitely the only thing he planned to eat until dinner.

"Only if you feed it to me," you could hear the smirk in his voice.

You took a cracker and pressed it to his lips. His eyes widened, and then softened as he opened his mouth and took the cracker between his teeth.

You moved to pull away, but he grabbed your wrist and pulled you on top of him. He took one of the crackers and pressed it to your lips. Now that he was in control, his smile was smug again.

"Go on. I can't starve my accomplice," he grinned.

You did your best to ignore how he was trapping you with his other arm, and how his body heat was starting to become indistinguishable from your own, and nibbled the cracker.

He laughed, and wrapped his now free hand around you. He sighed, as he brought it up to your hair, running his fingers through it.

"You know, if we never get out of here, we'll have to figure out how to survive. Obviously, I'll be the king, cause I'm devilishly handsome, and a rogue, so you'll have to be our hunter, and catch all the game that roams the office."

"Hmm, office game is usually pretty crafty, I don't think I'll be able to catch it by myself. We may have to get some people to join our nation."

"Yeah, I bet we could get some of Chev's army to join us," he grinned. His grin turned soft, and you found yourself melting into his eyes.

"If we are stuck here, there's no one else I'd rather be stuck with."

So soft, so vulnerable. He could be so genuine sometimes that you wanted to just cry.

"I won't lie to you, though. I have thought about locking you up before so that you could only look at me."

And other times he could be so childish.

You attempted to wriggle out of his grip, but he pouted and held you tighter.

"Hey, I just spilled my heart to you, and you're trying to flee. That's very rude."

"You're lucky I love you, or I would have fled for real a long time ago!"

Both of you froze. Then he grinned.

"You love me?"

You began struggling even more, but he ignored it, nuzzling his face in your neck.

"Finally! I've been waiting for you to fall for my charms."

"Clavis," you groaned as he mildly crushed your ribs.

"I know what you're worried about. You're worried that someone as handsome as me would have his eyes drawn to someone else. But no! My eyes are only for you!"

"Be serious," you said with an eye roll.

"I am!" He furrowed his brow. "I love you more than you can possibly love me!"

Before you could discuss anything further, you both heard a thud. You turned towards the sound, and saw that a rope ladder had been thrown through the window.

"Wait, did Chev give up?" You asked.

Clavis narrowed his eyes. "Let's get out of here so I can kill him."

And, once again, he was dragging you along after him for something you weren't sure you understood. But at least now, you could move forward with your relationship. Well, if he survived his attempt to kill Chev, that it.

#1k followers #ikemen prince chevalier #ikemen prince clavis #ikemen prince x reader #ikemen prince #clavis x reader #clavis lelouch #ikepri clavis #ikepri

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kirk · 1 year ago

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I deeply apologize, because you didn't make that post and now I'm dumping all my thoughts about it on you, but I saw it on your blog and I love you, so that's why.

anyway, I think about that a lot. like, sometimes I really doubt pete and patrick are as close as we think they are. pete is so aware of how people perceive him, especially in the early days, and I think a big aspect of his interactions with patrick back then were performative, bc he knew how much fans love it.

but then I think there's something else there. in the pandemic, patrick was composing. he was happy. he loves composing. pete talked about how he wasn't sure he wanted to make another album, that he became insulated. but patrick pulled him out, made him excited. when patrick wrote that letter saying he was giving up on music during the hiatus, pete reached out. pete writes so many songs that reflect themes of twin souls, twin skeletons, soul mates, pieces of ourselves in others. and you can argue its about lovers (and I'm sure it is sometimes). but p2 also talk about swimming together, making up one member of the band, being each other's other half. there's something there that I think that's deeper than music, that's deeper than any of us know.

(I am so sorry for all this!!)

oh definitely, there was a chunk of pre-h that A LOT of p2 stuff was fluffed up cause... thats just how media reacted in that time i feel like van days/tttyg/cork tree and early ioh was authentic as possible when theres cameras watching you but then late ioh and folie a lot was what was expected of them as their roles in the band, which included this Best Friend quota but i think thats what makes seeing and hearing about the hiatus and then srar to now so fucking insane because... slowly but surely we have seen them start to act like they did back in their roots, nothing flashy, but always joking around and knowing what the others going to say, even amounts of physical affection from both sides, having the others back, pulling each other out of dark holes and having the weirdest inside jokes ever. like i always say that stardust era especially (but id honestly include abap/mania era in this too) that stardust is like early days peteandpatrick but... healthy and i think they only could have got here by enduring this played up best friend thing in esp folie era, and then losing literally All of it and then having to build it back up again but this time knowing what is fake, knowing what is real, what they appreciated from each other and what they didnt (we can kinda see the remnants of folie in srar era when pete especially is trying to feel out what they should be doing in the public eye, but then it all but evaporates by abap era where theyre just. so much more mellow but a new type of insane cause theyre more comfortable with each other and at ease yknow?) and they may not be best friends in the Usual sense but, honestly the guy from good charlotte who had that podcast with pete a few months back put it perfectly where the Best best friends are the type where you can go weeks without talking but still know they would put it all on the line for you, and when you talk again after some time, its as easy as breathing to be around them and i think thats Exactly what peteandpatrick is. they arent the Doing everything together best friends they once were in the early days, but they know each other better than anyone in the world. they are good buddies, and theyre kinda the other's other half, too

#also anon you saying ily was so sweet. please never apologise for just talking to me i love YOU!

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so-bitya · 11 months ago

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okay, didn't get to talking about the show fooor a while now because I was trying to hold in all my complaints until it was over lol, but it's over now🎉yippee!🎉 so I can complain to my heart's content

so obviously there's some good parts, like the action (in episode 2), seeing everyone again with their upgraded designs ♥ (except Syrup big L), and having them dealing with adult issues, ok and now that's out of the way

-hype

the show wasn't meant to be some masterpiece but hoo boy that was kinda messy right? I really felt like the show writers weren't sure of where they were going with the show and so the execution felt lackluster. I definitely felt the show lost its momentum as it went on and the conclusion was simple to say the least.

The beginning started off quite nice. Seeing Nozomi have issues as an adult over expending herself for her student and failing. I liked how the show brought up divorce, a problem without a easy solution. I thought a major theme of the show was gonna be about the difficulties of being an adult and the life you dreamed of not turning out the way you want? And it would have been so good but instead took a left turn and make it about pollution like??

It felt so forced and genuinely less impactful, because how did the girls contribute to pollution?? what did this have to do with them becoming adults??? Depression works just fine! and having the monsters come from human misery just makes more sense? (didnt that happen anyway in episode 5 while hearing nozomi's and coco's insecurities?) but instead I gotta deal with this angel freak attacking people out the random and im supposed to take her seriously like ok.

and is it just me or was the time theme just thrown in there too? It didn't really feel like the girls were focused on the past that much. I thought the girls were going to deal with clinging to the past, lost time, and the pains of growing up? which would have more poignant then nozomi randomly fainting for a week and waking up just fine.

overall the beginning showed a lot of promise but it really didn't deliver as it went on. and no I didn't expect them to do something new?? but just stay in line with the themes they had, really felt like they tossed the whole adult precure concept out the window.

-action

ohhh my gosh the fight scenes?? they were so dull, like I was counting the amount of times they animated the girls actually hit something (it wasn't much) which is so disappointing because episode 2 Nozomi had such great action. she was beating up the villains with blood and gore it was insane, but now we got this like....

most of the show reused these cgi goons with bland designs, and we completely lost the monster of the week concept, so the monsters didn't feel like they were in harmony with the girls issues. The final boss was okay i guess, but yeah it really showed the lack of budget if they couldn't even animate most of the fights for the show.

-teamwork

and the biggest thing that bothers me is the lack of teamwork? like, this is a magical girl team show, why are they solving their problems individually?? Where's the friendship? Where's the love?? At most you get an episode of one girl helping another, but that's like two on screen max and that's so sad?

Why did Komachi help Saki off-screen? Why didn't they spend time baking with each other? Why didn't Rin have a convo with Nozomi? Why are all these fun, sweet moments being passed up? like they have their weekly drink parties, but they honestly feel like meetings. Especially if this is how they're acting after not being in contact for years?? What about a party, a huge sleep over and they all get blasted and have to deal with hangover the next day, like what about fun??

I dunno I felt sad watching uraras episode, which yes it was good and it was very nice to see her reconnect with Syrup, but then I remember the past urara episodes and the girls were always there supporting her. They showed up at her work, delivered her scripts, and sang her a "we love you urara" song with choreo and everything?? What happened to that team? they don't even notice or care? It all just feels so lonesome and humorless which is honestly the most disappointing part.

-romance

like what was the point. Why did coco need an apartment? boy can turn himself into a plushie, was him living with nozomi too raunchy? all for a romcom situation we never saw, which would've been great for them learning how to live like a couple??

the romance just felt so divorced from the rest of the story and unnecessary at times. And it wouldn't have been so bad if they let their personalities shine? Like why not focus on that Nozomi was inspired by Coco and how he feels about her being a teacher? (instead of stalking her 💀)

Or what about Nuts and Komachi? He was her editor before, he has nothing to say to her now that she's an accomplished writer? They were all friends before, let it show! Who cares if it was romantic of not? Why wouldn't all the girls be excited to see Coco and Nuts too? Why wouldn't Urara and Syrup still stay in contact (but he has time to deliver Nozomi's love letters?) No big reunion party?? WHY DID NO ONE STAY IN CONTACT WITH EACH OTHER????

It's the same issue the yes 5 shows had with romance, especially with Coco/Nozomi, bending itself around for melodrama. the reason no one else kept in contact with each other, was to build up coco and nozomi. the reason the time flower drama existed was for coco and nozomi.

I feel like im being harsh, but I just can see it being better executed. Or not even! Just something more substantially that fit the themes of them growing up. Like why bring up all those issues of marriage if they weren't going to solve them on screen! Or i dunno, break up and move on with life!

(sorry for the splash girlies, who had their duo come back only to have their stories revolve around two guys that never show up 💀)

#hope this isnt too much a downer #since the show is over and everythang #but yeah i was definitely befuddled by that plot lol #so anywayy im gonna post later about ideas i had about the show etc #because i liked the concept at least!#maybe theyll do better next time! 〒▽〒ㄏ #otona precure #b.txt

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yandere-daze · 1 year ago

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hello! this is the anon with the "u inspire me to write an self aware au". ive been thinking of making a seperate blog (bcus im planning to delete my current one soon, its a bit empty and i ended up not liking it) just for yandere and i really want to make a ramble post about yan self aware au with trickstar bcus i had this one idea that wont go away then tag u bcus again, u inspire me with ur writings. someday. im away from my current home and didnt bring my laptop cuz didnt expect to take long

Hell yeah, go for it!! I'm really happy to hear that I was able to inspire you to write for the self-aware AU, that's some of the highest praise I could ever hope to get 😊💕

I wish you lots of success with your blog and may it be the creative outlet you want! And also, yes, definitely do feel free to tag me if/when you end up writing something! I'd love to read it ^^

And oooh Trickstar! I'm definitely interested in reading what you have to say about them! I've mentioned them in passing one or two times but I don't think I ever really did an indepth post about them. So please do feel free to share, I'll definitely be reading it when you post it 😊

And oof I feel that so bad with the laptop because funnily enough, I was in the exact same position for the last two months. I went to Belgium for 2 months and only packed a company laptop which I didn't want to use to write fanfic for obvious reasons ( I would also have to log in to the company VPN for internet to even work). So all I had the last two months to write was my phone, which wasn't really ideal 😅

It's one of the reasons why I haven't really been posting any writing recently, though I have typed up quite a bit for a pretty long post, though it's not for a fandom I've written for before. If you happen to be into Raincode, I guess you're in luck though 😌

I hope I can write and post some more when I'm back at home with my laptop. Hope you'll also be able to write soon ^^

And yes, rambling posts can be so fun, I love doing them to just get an idea out there in the world that I've been thinking about a lot but haven't written an elaborate piece for yet. It's also why I tend to prefer headcanon posts compared to fics, it allows me to just spill all the ideas and thoughts I have at once!

So to end this all of, please do share your works ( if you want to) once you've posted something ^^

#anon ask #💭 anon

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qazastra · 4 months ago

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rain drop, no clue, and gas represent some of the best that 127 has to offer in style and execution. i think that even my least favorite bsides (time capsule, suddenly, meaning of love) have real merit and i don't skip them! i dance along!

i find walk to be a good song, if a somewhat underwhelming title track without one of those jaw-dropping moments about 1 or 2/3 of the way through the song that i've come to expect from nct at this point and at a relatively slow pace, but if it had been a bside and gas had been the tt (as taeyong wanted, i hear) it would have been a really good bside (track reviews below because i decided to write those for some reason)

wall to wall........ WE ARE SO BACK. disappointing and unnecessary use of AI in the track video aside, this song is incredible. welcome back nct intros!!!!!!!! once again!!!!!!!!!!!! this is a STUNNER. idk much about hip hop but i didn't believe mark's comment that this album would include 'high quality hip-hop' until i heard wall to wall.

ALSO I FORGOT TO MENTION SOME TRULY UNFORTUNATE USE OF AAVE IN WALK... WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'LL "BE BUSSIN" im LOSING IT

no clue is excellent. sorry to everyone but i am a sucker for ty starting off a song. and the way it switches up to the Singers and then back to taeyong's particular tone and then doyoung again... and YUTA is there. SINGING. HI. i would say it's cinema but it's Music. instrumental never loses my interest.

i've heard some people dislike orange seoul which baffles me tbh???? but to each their own. it's melodic, makes interesting use of half-steps (if i remembered what the hell that word actually means), reminds me of pharcyde and i love it. also perfect combination of rapping and singing. thank you for this producer HUMBLER whoever u are

pricey is so fun it makes me want-- no, need-- to bop my head along. the chorus is really catchy i can imagine this going hard at a concert. piano reminds me of the bounciness of elevator 127

time capsule is sweet. it's simply an enjoyable chill feel-good song

can't help myself i definitely enjoyed it from the start i just didnt know what to do with it because i can hear so many (what sounds like) nods to cheesy 00s/10s pop ballads... but i like it???? maybe the closest thing to a classic sm ballad on the record. haechan and jaehyun (i believe) elevate this for real, along with the harmonies. last minute of the song is Singers who Sing. and johnny ofc. we need him

rain drop is sooooo goooooooooooood it reminds me a bit of misty and time lapse. bridge is so fun to listen to

gas is even better than no clue, it's kind of a shame it comes so late on the tracklist but i love that it shows up after rain drop. very 127, swaggering (what a dumb word soooo sorry im just having fun here i promise) along the swung horn percussion with an earned confidence some ppl will find it grating, obviously, but would it be a 127 signature track if that wasn't the case? it sounds like it follows directly from 2 baddies and fact check and by GOD it should have been the title track. walk does not have the gravitas! i'm sorry it just doesn't GAS SOUNDS SO GOOD

suddenly is fine: one of 127's brighter and less experimental songs overall, but interesting enough for me to still actively enjoy. the way the chorus drags around is v satisfying esp right after the prechorus. the brass is great

meaning of love is the one song that does not sound like it necessarily belongs on the album. it sounds to me like a better version of road trip (a song i don't really like) and i actually enjoy it, even if it doesn't stick out as being terribly good and i probably won't add it to any of my playlists.

and that's all. please check out walk the 6th album by nct 127

the low points on walk feel a lot higher than the low points on several other 127 albums

#m #my posts #nct 127 #nct #bands

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soft-boi-eli · 3 years ago

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Mcyts helping a trans masc after top surgery. (Part 1)

Tw:swearing, pain pills, some hints to vomiting, fluff as well.

Wilbur

This simp...

Makes sure you regularly drain your drains, take your medication.

You dont even have to get the fuck up, I mean he's your personal butler until the doctor gave you the okay.

Three times a day you get a smoothie. He can tell that you dont want to eat because of the pain.

The least you can do is drink something to nurioush you while you were in pain.

If you're embarrassed about having to sleep on some dog pee pads for the drain. Dont be.

Wilbur may not understand but he will constantly comfort you. He'll even make a video to tell his viewers he won't be posting for a moment. A personal issues came up and that is all they know for now.

Also when cold he'll try to keep you warm by very, very gentle cuddles. But any sign of pain and he's off of you and getting you warm blankets and heating packs.

His sweaters? Now all yours. You have no say. He will give you one every day knowing you find alot of comfort in wearing his clothes.

The last thing he wants is you in pain. Especially if it was caused by him.

Your testosterone shot? Dont worry he's got it for you.

He doesn't want you to get up unless you needed to go to the restroom or you were itching to get up.

If you dont take it slow he will threaten you.

This is a threat. He will make you sit back down if you tried to get up and clean.

All in all he is a simp and your butler.

Technoblade

Technoblade may not know what to do but he will try.

He's quite nervous but when he realized you havent eaten and needed something in your system for your pain meds hell make you something soft and light on the stomach.

Are you cold? He'll cover you in a blanket and just sit next to you. Floof senses you in pain and cuddles you more then technoblade.

Techno was a bit butt hurt but knew that you needed alot of support right now.

With his height his clothes are either tight or loose. But his hoodies are always huge. And very fucking comfortable.

His scent relaxed you and helped you sleep at night.

He is a hidden simp.

He will make sure you're comfortable. If you want him to he'll sleep with you in the living room.

When you start walking him and Floof are constantly following you. Just to make sure you are safe and comfortable.

You cant help but love your two boys.

His streams and videos are already inconsistent but he did say his next video or stream might take a longer time.

But if you dont mind then you'll sit near him while he streams. If you needed anything he'll get it.

You saying hi to chat. They know you're in pain by your tone.

And anyone he's in a call with will ask what's up. And when you tell them they'll understand and they'll hype you up.

It warms techno's heart when his friends hype you up.

God this closeted simp is melting internally.

Schlatt

He will tease you.

Pictures are taken and spread around the internet like a wild fire.

Caption to those pictures?

This dumbass just got out of surgery and didnt expect to feel like trash lol.

But off camera he's quite the nice guy. Reminding you to drink your water, getting you soft foods or soups, heck he give you some of his pushies from his youtooz.

And this behemoth of a man will give you his shirt or hoodies.

You are with him when he streams or records.

There is no say.

He wants to keep his eyes on you and make sure you are comfortable and safe.

Lowkey dragged you bed into his recording room, you were just vibing in the corner.

You meds are on a set schedule. If the time lands when he's on stream he doesn't think. Just gets up grabs your meds and a premade smoothie.

With that he gave them to you.

Watching you swallow that pill because you can be stubborn with pain meds.

Returns to the stream.

Yells at chat for calling him a simp. He told them you were in pain and it's the least he can do for you.

Will low key rub your back off stream. As sleeping while sitting up us hell on your shoulders.

Jambo is all over you, soaking up the attention he can get while you were immobile.

Schlatt would glare st him for taking away his S/O.

When it came to you wanting to walk he will let you.

If you hurt then this man would laugh and tell you to sit your ass down. You are going anywhere just yet.

He's gonna carry you when you are in as much pain.

He's tall and there is no stopping him.

It makes him feel a bit happier due to the fact you aren't hurting as much, and still getting to the place you needed.

Also he will hug you if he sees you are uncomfortable. The hug is very soft and unlike him.

But at least he is trying.

He also keeps his yelling down, doesn't want you to make too many stiff movements. It would hurt the hell out of you.

Tommy

Ok. Hear me out, butler.

He see the pain you are in and as one of his best friends he wont let you do anything.

Your parents were out of town after your surgery and it wasn't their fault their work called in suddenly.

So you were sent over to Tommy's for the three weeks they were out.

Tommy would let you relax on his bed, heck even sleep on it as well.

Doesn't care if your drains stain the bed. That's an easy clean up and he wants you to be comfortable.

He does still stream. Because it's something he does for a living.

But he'll try to keep it a bit quieter.

You once walked out of the room when he was streaming. You looked like a gremlin, hunched over while you had to take a piss.

When you entered you were greeted by wilbur, techno, and phil telling you they hope you heal fast.

"It only gets better from now on (y/n). Take it easy alright?"-wilbur

"Congrats mate, just relax and dont forget to focus on healing."-Phil

"Yo you got the surgery. Pog. Stay healthy (y/n)."-techno

You melted lightly. A small smile graced your face.

It brought you joy and there was nothing that could compare to it. Honestly.

It seemed almost every day someone tommy knew was hopi g a speedy recovery.

He once yelled at chat for saying you should suck it up.

"CHAT THEY JUST WENT THROUGH SURGRY. LEAVE THEM ALONE!"

You forgot that your parents were even out for those weeks.

Tommy would definitely understand slightly that it would hurt to constrict your chest.

"You cold?"

When you nod tommy is up and handing you one of his hoodies. They are big and comfy. Easy to put on too. So they are perfect.

His two dogs, Walter and Betty?

Expect them in his room curled around you. Dogs know when humans feel pain and when they need something to comfort them.

The stream kind of enjoyed that.

They got wholesome content from you and dog content.

Win win.

Tommy will make sure you have your meds.

If it lands during a stream he blacks out the camera and carefully gets you the things needed for it.

Get you a best friend like tommy.

They wont let you do much when in pain.

Tubbo

He doesn't fully know what to do. He went and spent a few nights over at your house.

Your parents asked his parents for help so they sent over tubbo.

They made a list but the poor boy couldnt read it.

"A sm-oosthie with their pain pill... what the hell is a sm-oosthie?!"

It took him calling tommy to ask him to tell him.

"Tubbo. It says smoothie and who is this fo-."

He hung up before tommy could finish and made the smoothie.

Your cat was quite cuddly.

When he walked in your cat was on your lap.

"Tubbo? When did you get here?" Oh yeah it was a surprise.

"Not too long ago. Your parents left and asked me to help."

He was doing it in all good.

But he scared you so badly.

He bought you a stuffed animal...

It was a huge minecraft bee. And by huge I mean huge.

Like here's the stuffed animal.

Ignore the child. I wished there was a better picture.

But yeah you get the point.

Tubbo may not know how to help you fully but he's trying.

Tommy came to visit with wilbur and phil.

Tommy was meeting up with them and you lived close to wilbur.

When they saw you laid up in bed, tubbo trying to find out how to help with your medication phil kinda went father mode.

You got homemade soup to take your meds.

Tubbo was quite happy to see you smiling and lightly laughing.

When they left you felt better.

Tubbo may not know how to do alot but he tried his best. And you loved every moment.

You got you best friend to help you. And nothing was better then that.

Ranboo

Ranboo spent the night and all you guys could do was joke about the pain.

The jokes were quite self deprecating too.

All night you guys were up.

You couldn't sleep because of the pain and he didnt want to sleep due to the fact he didnt want you to be alone.

So you two were sleep deprived and your parents were concerned. But understood you two didnt want the other to feel bad.

After you healed a bit your parents got called into work. Leading to you spending a few days over there.

Ranboo streamed a recorded with you in the back ground.

He forgot you were there once and he turned on face cam. There you were in the background nose deep into a book while wearing one of his hoodies.

You were freezing and your shirts were a bit too tight.

He just gave you one of his and that was that.

"Whis in the background?"-dono

"In the background?" He turned around to see you just reading your book.

"Oh. That's one of my friends. They had a surgery a week ago."-ranboo

He turned to you, "(y/n) say hi to stream."

Looking up you waved.

"My gay mind went brrr at the idea of no sacks of fat. Now body do the big pain."-(y/n) 2021

It brought a laugh to ranboo and his chat.

You joked through the pain. It was funny.

Dream

What is this I see? He's a simp indeed.

Low key he's answering your beck and call.

He's smothering you in love.

It may not be physical affection but it is still affection.

Your hoodies are replaced with his.

They are huge and comfy.

He saw something online that reminded him of you.

He said it was cute and decided you needed it.

You loved it. It helped you sleep.

Since sapnap lives with him he sends in sapnap sometimes because he's recording or has to get something that wasn't in the house.

Also when you found the zipper you unzipped it and found dream stashed some gift cards and little trinkets in it. Along with a note.

'Knew you would of found this.'-Clay

It shocked you kind of.

But you loved it. It was quite comforting that he gave his affection in these ways still.

Even if it wasn't physically.

Patches is on you 24/7.

She's cuddling you and being very gentle on you.

Low key she won't leave you though, she's following you everywhere, on your lap, sitting there when your on the toilet.

She's clingy. More clingy then before.

But it warmed your heart.

If george visits then he'll see a little gremlin making a b line to the bathroom.

All because the pain made your stomach feel upset.

And you hadn't eaten anything because of pain.

Dream is quick to rush in and see what's wrong.

You were sitting on the ground in the bathroom. Needless to say it didnt end well and you hated it.

"Baby. Do you want me to get you a smoothie and your pain meds?" You were grateful.

After leaving the bathroom you lightly hunched over you noticed the British man in your living room.

You watched his videos.

You waved lightly with a smile.

"Oh sorry (y/n) I didnt tell you george was coming did i?"

Your look told it all.

"Sorry you have to see me like this." You had the urge to apologize.

"No dont be sorry. Surgery is painful."-george

With a small nod you went back to your room and relaxed.

George

He didnt know what to do at all.

He answered your requests.

But he didnt know why you needed that thick ass blanket in the middle of the summer.

But now you have it.

Your stuffed animal that was left in the living room?

It's in your arms by your side.

He's sad it wasn't him in your arms but understood it would cause you pain.

He just lightly lays in your lap.

It brought you comfort and him comfort.

Your germilin ass tended you get up and walk at the weirdest time too.

3am?

Your are going to get a snack.

5am?

You are on your way to the toilet.

7am?

Your once more in the kitchen getting something to eat with your pain pill.

George slept through it and was confused when you weren't in bed like the doctors told you to.

He's quite meticulous with your meds and eating habits.

He doesn't push but makes sure you have something with that pill.

Hell try to help you with your bandages. But sometimes got queasy at the blood and stuff.

It was okay with you though.

You didnt mind that due to the fact that you too got queasy as well.

I think you guys sleep through this alot.

Wilbur and tommy visited.

You was shocked and confused when they had a few get well soon gifts.

Tommy got you a small fidget toy, just something to do with your hands sometimes.

Wilbur got you a few books and a small stuffed toy.

It was a orca.

You loved it but still loved the one that george got you.

He got you a little wooloo one.

It was something that was soft and easy to cuddle.

But the books wilbur gave you were amazing.

It gave you something to do for a long while. And it gave george some more cuddle time.

Other than not knowing what to do george was a great source of comfort.

Sapnap

Sapnap is a bit more experienced with it.

Kind of knowing what to do and all together he just know more then most people.

There is a regular schedule for you meds and so called meals, he changes out the dog pads if he notices them dirty. He knows how to maneuver himself next to you so there was no pain.

He also sucked up that he would be overwhelmingly hot and sat next to you under the blanket.You weren't nearly as cold because of that.

Also since sapnap lives with dream I imagine that dream pops in some times and so does patches.

You all were probably best friends as children. And people always thought that you and dream would get together.

Only because you two were more touchy.

But you saw him as an older brother, and took a liking to sapnap.

Dream was really suportive and saw you as a little sibling.

Dream probably saw you not doing to well and made you something to eat and brought your pain medication.

That was because sapnap was sleeping next to you.

Patches curled up between to two of you and dream brought in something you hadnt seen before.

A roll away bed.

This mother fucker got a whole new bed just so he could sleep in the same room as you and sapnap.

"Sapnap is a heavy sleeper. What if you need something?" He was correct.

You woke up to pain and discomfort.

Dream woke up but sapnap didnt.

You were mainly cold though...

How the hell were you cold with this man radiating radiation the heat of a thousand suns?

No clue. But probably the anesthesia since you were in sapnap room dream just opened the closet and tossed his hoodie to your lap.

You woke up sapnap when you put on the hoodie on accident.

He pushed up against your shoulder a bit more and draped his arm over your lap.

"What's wrong?" Sapnap mumble made you stiffen up. Dream seemed to fall back to sleep too.

"Just a bit cold." He lightly nodded into your neck.

"Mmmmmm. How though."-sapnap

"I dont fuckin know."-(y/n)

He let out a sleep chuckle and seemed to fall asleep again.

You just sat there. Patches and sapnap on you lap technically.

Sapnap woke up and made you breakfast at some point. You were in and out of it due to barely any sleep.

Dream woke up as well. You didnt even know when they left. But patches stayed with you.

Those weeks you were treated the best with these two with extra cuddles from patches.

I didnt know there was a max amount of paragraphs. But hey I guess it's something you find out sooner or later. So there is going to be a part 2. Including some character I missed.

#wilbur x reader #georgenotfound x reader #jschlatt x reader #dream x reader #sapnap x reader #tommyinit x reader #tubbo x reader #ranboo x reader #mcyt fluff #techno x reader #technoblade x reader #mcyt

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tiramisiyu · 2 years ago

Note

im interested to know what your thoughts are on the second anniversary card. for me… idk, i felt really depressed after reading it (even with the spicy scene), like i thought it was so well done with the conflict about why luke didnt want to propose to her, and handling the death of his parents, but then to suddenly go from that level of selflessness and denying his own happiness to a proposal felt so jarring. i know in the date that rosa says one conversation won’t change how luke thinks but even so the proposal felt so forced and different to how luke has been shown in other dates and idk to me i really think it needed to be longer OR two different dates. to me the way he proposed just felt so… rushed. im not here to bash on the date because i genuinely really liked it (and it was so interesting to see the parallels between how the two viewed their future and relationship!! + more about lukes illness and parents is a plus!) but i think i just feel super sad after reading it. maybe that’s the real reason why we got so many fluffy dates that ignored lukes illness LMAO. but ya thanks for reading my thoughts and id love to know what you think!!

putting in another person's ask here too:

firstly, it really warms my heart that yall are still interested in hearing my opinion even though i've taken a step back from the active participation i used to have! i'll organize my thoughts below (it's been like a week since i've read it so things are a bit murkier now... kazuha and heizou were taking up all of my braincells during this week, sorry)

I should probably preface this by saying that emotionally, I don't have much to say; last year I was overwhelmed with emotion, sobbing, the works, but this year my feelings have kinda shifted to "aww good for you XY!" and "man, we're doing this dance again, of depressed XY not doing things bc he's concerned about MC's long term happiness and MC gradually convincing him to just do what would make him happy" (I mean, not that it's a bad thing; it's not easy to get out of old mindsets).

It definitely was depressing overall, so it makes sense that anon #1 feels that way. The sad mood didn't really lift until the end when the proposal happened. And I kinda feel what you both mean by it being rushed - I was expecting them to wait a few more days after the cemetery conversation, so when XY actually proposed I was kinda blindsided LOL. Like it literally went like this:

MC: [talks about how she's willing to be with him until the end as they walk back from the cemetery; at this point in time he was still not willing to propose bc of his illness and whatnot]

XY: [suddenly drags MC back to his place, sprinting, not saying a word]

MC: ?? ok then

XY: [reappears and proposes]

All this happens in like, idk, 30 minutes?? Yeah, definitely felt rushed to me. I think the issue lies in how we KNOW that XY knows that MC would think in this way, but it's not really explained at all why this particular conversation - and nothing else beforehand - incited such a massive change in heart in him. Unless if he really did need to just hear the words and was subconsciously just waiting for her to say so? But that doesn't quite fit with his selfless personality that's very explicitly described in this particular date.

I think they may have intentionally been trying to mirror the circumstances in the 1st anniv date, which might explain how quickly he was able to change his mind and be convinced by MC within the time limits of the date. But if that’s the case, I think that works better for confession than proposal, since marriage shouldn’t be something you jump into just bc you were feeling in the mood to propose right then...

The proposal content itself, ofc, was great. Very nice speech, 10/10; Themis writers know what a girl wants. It was also nice to hear a little bit about XY's mom although it wasn't the plot-relevant stuff I wanted 😭😭 I wanna know if they were intentionally killed and what their professions were, that sort of thing;; There's also no info on whether they're making progress in maybe curing XY and time's running a little short, so I wonder if/how this will be resolved.

(actually i don't really recall where he said that his sickness wasn't 100% the reason why he was proposing so feel free to remind me 😭) lmk if there were any other specific things you wanted my thoughts on!

#ask #im sorry it took so long to respond to these

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myvillainfam · 2 years ago

Text

My review of XH's Overload!!

First I'll be giving my first thoughts of the song, typing whatever comes to mind. I'll have my actual review right after. This is a long post so if you don't feel like reading everything, I'll be leaving my overall thoughts of the album and a ranking at the very bottom! :)

Zzz..

Oooo groovy!! GUNIL!!! oh~ okay~ is that ode?? damn okAY JUNGSU!! Tralalala bring it back! Yesssss SING THOSE LYRICS LIKE YOU OWN THEM (cuz you technically do) There's the part from the teaser!!! Ahhh it's so good. Very pop rock!!! The rap part! Ode wtf do you mean you don't know what you did? SIR YOU SLAYED MY HEART. I'M BACK ONLINE FEELING LIKE THE AIR~!!! GOING DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO THE CONNECTION~!!! BANANA GIREO GIREO GI~REO GIREOGI(and I can't make out the rest. forgive me I don't know Korean) THATS IT??? wish it was longer TT_TT

Actual review: 10/10

I loved it! I was a bit hesitant when I heard this song in the album teaser because I though it would sound to much like generic pop. But I'm pleasantly surprised! It's very much in the genre of music I listen to, pop rock!! I also felt a Day6 influence, whether or not they actually intended it. This song is wacky and very fun. It gets you ready to party! It's a great start to the album!

Hair Cut

I listen to this from their comeback show case. Unfortunately I did not write down my first thoughts. But here's my review on it:

Definitely leans more to the rock genre but honestly I didn't like it as much as I'd hoped. The bridge was beautiful—the best part in my opinion. I wouldn't be surprised to hear if this song was made with Hello, world! mini album. It has those HW! elements in there. I do like the song but its not the one I'd listen to the most. Score out of ten? 7/10

LUNATIC

As I queue this one, I wanna say that I really like how XH explained this song. It sounded like they really had fun making this track. Here go my stream of thoughts!

Interesting. Beginning notes remind me of a "spooky" song. AHH I wasn't expecting that scream LMAO. low-key scared me. oh okay starting with gaon! I'm enjoying the guitar. oh going slower. building up for the chorus? im still hearing the "spooky" sound lol. Oh! oh! bass drop??? YESSS!!! I'm just keeping it right~! this part really reminds me of the band All Time Low, maybe their For Baltimore song? No, but definitely something off of that album, Don't Panic (btw i really recommend to listen to this album if you haven't. its my favorite ATL one) WOW very emotional bridge! The ending was too abrupt! I expected more! I'm too greedy lol

Actual review: 10/10

I think this is my favorite song off of the album. It's just reminiscent of many rock (read emo) bands I used to listen to. After a few more listens, I don't think its very spooky but it's a song I'd listen to when I'd want to feel badass lol. There's just something about this song that really gets me excited.

Crack in the mirror

LMAO the beginning guitar sound reminded me of the Knight Rider theme song. OH OKAY EXCUSE ME I FEEL ATTACKED. MR LEE YOUR VOICE IS GREAT. GIVE MORE LINES TO JUN HAN HE SOUNDS AMAZING (or is that gaon?? either way damn) okaayyyyy giving some bad boy energy i see yall. AHHHH THE GUITAR REMINDS ME OF BMTH ahhhhh i live for this harder rock!!! GAON YOUR ENGLISH IS SO GOOD i melt every time i hear this man sing in english. he has a good deep voice that is just chefs kiss rewinded just to hear that part again and his voice reminded me of Andy Black. ode also has very fluent intonations in his english. if i didnt know anything about this kband I would have thought that gaon and ode would be the english speakers. OMG THE BRIDGE THESE DUDES REALLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE THEM

Actual review: 10/10

Another song where i feel badass! This one was hard for me to compare with the rest. I really loved the way it sounded. It goes hard. The vocals in this one are just amazing. I think this one would be one of the songs I would recommend to people that aren't really into Kpop but are willing to give it a try.

Ghost

ANOTHER SPOOKY VIBES ONE. this time its more like scary clown. IM TELLING YOU GAON'S ENGLISH IS HEAVEN. this whistle part has been stuck in my head this WHOLE DAY (since i saw the showcase. the whistle is ADDICTING. i really like the chorus. ode!! i love hearing him rap. THIS SECOND PRECHORUS DAMN. IM BROKEN~! *whistle*

Actual review: 10/10

Ah I don't even know how to properly put this one into words. It's GOOD! There's a tad bit of aggressiveness in this song with a bit of desperation??? Like I said I'm not sure how to explain it. (I'm looking for the translation of the lyrics maybe that will help me) Okay so it seems that I got the interpretation right. I can think of it like a tragic love where the lover dies or the narrator cuts them out because of their toxicity (i'm leaning toward the latter). Anyways it's a very beautiful song. The whistle is what pulls me in with the "i'm broken~" lyrics. It's paired beautifully.

X-MAS

LAST ONE!!! i'm not ready for this album to end. i'm having fun listening.

OKAY I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT. UMMMM GAON????? theres a reason this man is my bias wrecker. SPOOKY VIBES IM TELLING YOU oh oh this chorus!!! the prechorus!!! the bass in the second verse!!!!! vibing with this song. JOOYEON THAT BRIDGE WITH JUNGSU. i mean they are the main vocalists for a reason

Actual Review: 8/10

Ah the song where Jungsu said he wanted to play on Christmas. I think it's too creppy to that but it still sounds sort of Christmas-y? This is one of those songs that I don't really know how to feel about it. I guess it kinda has one of those vibes like the Nightmare Before Christmas. It's a "spooky" song but also not at the same time??? It's a good song but idk if I'd rate it top 3.

Overall Thoughts and Ranking:

I really enjoyed this album way more than Hello, world! Their progress from that album to this one is really astonishing. I really did enjoy this album and I've been listening to it on repeat. With that being said, this was a very hard album to rank it tracks mainly because I really got into it after listening them on repeat. It's a solid album. The first track really gets you pumped for the rest of the album that just blows you away. Most of the tracks are really on the same level as each other but if I had to put them into a list of which I liked the best on the first listen it would be this:

Lunatic

Crack in the mirror

Zzz..

Ghost

X-MAS

Hair Cut

I'm not actually satisfied with this ranking mainly because each song has their own uniqueness that shines thru if your listening for different things.

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apple-os · 8 months ago

Text

okay some of the tags got cut off because i was going on too much but long story short i wanted ppl to talk about themselves and the way i do that is by talking about myself because i also expect that to just be the norm

and i am not going to change that for people who didnt even care to properly get to know who i am outside of joking and vidya gamez

communication is important and if u hide things from someone and expect them to know theyve hurt people despite everyone pretending everythings fine then thats on you

short story long tho ,,

ive said it here im autistic i cant always tell the vibe in places im unfamiliar with. got strong vibes of "i hate but like u" friendships in this one server. turned out to not be showing good enough vibes and fitting in well enough. because i was masking a little too heavily and not thinking about what i was saying before i said it

thought things were fine and dandy because im largely oblivious to a lot of things unless people tell me. i just figured folkz were fine with me talking about things i enjoyed or loved and myself because thats what most people tended to do when they wanted to be friends as...far as i knew

but here we are and ive been called pretentious for talking too much about myself and my girlfriend despite never having expressed that i wanted everything to be about me, quite the opposite in fact

my girlfriend whom ive been in love with for about a year now and only just became an item with so you can imagine why i talked about her a lot after everything thats happened between us

i never said nobody else could talk about themselves!! i got a little offended over a dumb joke once mainly because ive heard it so many times!! i talked about my country and its history and some culture and apparently people didnt like that either!! i made some kind of stupid jokes i wouldnt usually make in any other situation, like oh yes im a misogynist and oh yes i am definitely a transphobe when i am trans, and i have a girlfriend who i love very much!! said girlfriend is upset shes been spoken for, might i add

no i do not hate women! by god, NO, I AM NOT S/PERSTR/IGHT. im just a dumb obnoxious dude who is loud and talkative and tries to be approachable and occasionally fit in when they can

i can imagine this is more of a miscommunication than malice on some people's part, but i also am very mad that i wasn't even heard out before being called pretentious and being told i talk too much about somebody i love not to mention one of my friends was sidelined when trying to reason with the person who lashed out at me

i like talking about my gf,, so what? you know u can talk about your partner too yknow id love to hear it or i wouldve if not for the fact that u shut me down when i dont even know u and i thought we were bantering because u called ur friends and urself sigma for making sex jokes around minors as a minor urself but i also yknow wanted to express that i didnt like that in some way, which is one of the only issues i had with all of u up until this point i thought it would be funny and silly to say i didnt care if u folks were sigma. which sounds really silly put like that but anyway, i didnt express it was a joke well enough apparently and that led to the outburst

in some ways i can understand why the anger was there, but i cant understand why it was left to simmer for so long, nor can i really understand the need to trashtalk me behind my back [which im fairly certain was happening the way 2 ppl described me in the same ways and other reasons]

wont pretend im not at fault in some capacity. i shouldve used my head [and tonetags] when talking to others. but um. the communication error was the main problem and was largely not my fault so ,, idk what to say on that other than maybe set boundaries when you make friends next time ? anyway yeah thats all rant over

ppl who like making friends solely with one-note cardboard boxes who will hang out with them when it's convenient and never open up about who they are as people and what their lives are like dni

#rant #pawsonal #apollo srs's #i dont think about what i say before i say it and that is on me btw but it is also difficult #anyway dont get mad @ me and feel the need to unleash wrath upon me it isnt worth the hassle #not only because ive stopped caring much about what u guys see me like but also because id rather this leave on a note that does not have #any form of direct harassment involved #talk abt me behind my back i already expect that but do not talk to me . at all #no names were mentioned here everything is vague in public spaces and i expect the same of all of u #this is just here for me to vent out my feelings i do that all the time on here im just like #addressing u as in the ppl in that server just in case ur lurking and happen to stumble across this #im not new to the concept because ive done it before. but anyway not that i expect anybody to go after me but please leave me alone #also im not saying u guys r one note cardboard boxes. im saying i dont want to be forced into the position where i have to be one #anyway rant over for real

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mirrorforevers · 4 years ago

Text

here, there, and everywhere • graham coxon/reader

this fic is based on two prompts y'all sent me:

and

this fic really tested all of my blur knowledge holy Fuck. blur as talking heads au i guess. how cool would it be if they

1. had a girl bassist instead of the cheese tory dude

2. werent as unhappy as they were in the mid 90s (just a bit)

3. were just a little 🤏🏻 bit more female friendly lets just pretend this is a universe where the blurjob passes didnt exist heh

it took me everything i had to make this sound as realistic as it could be. u know these girls who think they could fix patrick bateman or don draper? perhaps y’all could fix blur

consider this a gift n not only me writing for your prompt, @nottuned! thank u so much for all your support n encouragement n for always bein so sweet 🥺 i hope u enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it!

let’s see how many references to unfortunate britpop moments y’all can find in this

also i hope i captured the silliness of the gossip and drama in that era well. if you enjoyed it, please leave an ask telling me more! ur feedback is rly important to me 😔✊🏻

tw (?) reader has shitty parents

word count: 7.938 (this one's quite long!)

smut. set in the 90s. au.

You were unlocking your door when you heard your house phone ring. The shrill sound echoed through the empty corridors as you hurriedly unwrapped your scarf, tossing your keys and backpack on nearby furniture as you ran to answer the call.

“Hello?” You answer, panting.

“Y/N?”

“Dave?” You smile, that call was a very welcome surprise. Your friend owed you an answer.

A few weeks ago, Dave Rowntree, your music classmate who became a close friend, told you that he had teamed up with two other proficient musicians to form a band. Dave was ecstatic, and every day he had new stories about his new friends to tell you between breakfasts and lunches that you shared between the countless hours of rehearsals. Even though you weren't part of the group, you already felt that you knew Damon and Graham like the back of your hand. Yin and Yang. One was expansive, ambitious, vain, impulsive. The other, shy, introspective, anxious and careful.

Damon Albarn wanted to be an actor, Graham Coxon had a firm foot in the visual arts. One was a fan of grand classical compositions, the other was a Beatles fan. They had been friends since they were children, in a seemingly unbreakable bond. Damon dropped out of his theater class not only because out of a sudden he had found a bigger calling in music instead of acting, but also because he couldn't stand being away from his best friend for so long. You found yourself often imagining their faces and voices while trying to make all of the wild and endearingly funny stories Dave told you more tangible in your head.

It was not long before Dave started dropping little hints that they needed someone else for their project. “It’s not that Graham isn’t good at bass,” he’d say, “but we could do better.” It wasn't at the top of your plans to be part of a band right now, especially as you were preparing intensely to join the Royal Academy of Music, and he knew it. When you mentioned the conversations you had with Dave about the boys on your family dinner, in quiet wonder and timid want of being part of something really exciting, your parents wrinkled their noses. Focus on the greater things, they’d say. Don’t let these boys distract you from your goal.

Our goal, they meant to say. Since you were born, you never knew if the things you wanted were really your will or theirs.

But anyway.

That dynamic went on for a while, until the day Dave invited you to audition for them while you shared a Diet Coke in the tube home.

“Will it take too much of my time?” You asked, coyly.

“Bold of you to assume we’ll let you in that quickly.” He chuckles, amused by your confidence. You playfully elbow him in return. He knew how good you were at what you did, though, and there’s lightness in his tone when he continues, “But no, unless you let it. You’ll probably have to stand up to Damon every once in a while.” He sips the drink, handing it over to you.

“What about Graham? How much is he determined to make it big?”

“Damon’s the one who wants it the most. Graham’s studying Fine Arts at Goldsmiths, so. There’s still cautiousness in him.”

“Huh. Okay then.” You reply, thoughts running wild. “Do we have a time and date?”

“Is tomorrow ok to you?”

“Sure. After our class?”

“Perfect.” The train reaches his station. He ruffles your hair: “See you tomorrow then.”

“See you.”

You don’t tell anything about it to your parents, you just warn them that you’ll arrive a bit later than usual. Dave’s intel was crucial to your choice of songs: knowing Graham was the beatlemaniac and also the rational brake to Damon’s tireless ambition, you knew who to please and have as an ally, so you build an innovative and fresh mashup of Paul McCartney’s greatest basslines to play for them. Of course it could backfire, but you didn’t care. You had a hell of a good ear anyway and if Damon wanted you to play anything out of the blue, you would improvise beautifully over it.

The day comes. You didn’t know why you were that nervous for an amateur audition. You weren’t even sure if it was the right path to follow, given that, depending on how focused Damon really was and how contagious his aspiration was, being part of a band could really take you out of your predestinated course. The reason why you were so nervous, now thinking a little more about it, may be because deep inside, you want your path to be a little less predictable. You didn’t want to fill your heart with hopes that you might make it big and travel all over the world because you didn’t even know them. But… what if it clicks? You knew some people in the scene whose work was getting seriously recognized out there.

Meeting them for the first time was an enigmatic experience. Damon was incredibly brash and cocky - not the first theater kid you’ve met in your life. Graham was way more approachable, though also a bit conceited when pushed just right. You wondered if you’d fit in that boys’ club, and decided you wouldn’t be an easy target for discredit or any kind of shit they might give you. “Took me a while to fully get their trust. You’ll do just fine”, Dave said, out of their earshot.

That gave you more fuel to play amazingly well. Damon definitely wasn’t one to be impressed quickly, but he was, when you finished your set. So was Graham - Graham was starry eyed with your performance, actually. Albarn showed you a song and asked you if you could improvise to it, just as you imagined. Of course you could, on the first play. You even suggested some adjustments to its structure. Your feedback was welcomed and noted.

Even though everything went surprisingly well, you still weren't sure if you would be a member of “Seymour”, as they called themselves. (You knew it wasn’t the best name, but you didn’t have a better suggestion at the time so you’ve kept your opinion to yourself.) Graham became eerily quiet out of a sudden and wouldn’t cross eyes with you the entire time you were there. Damon, well, was Damon. Perhaps he thought you were too ordinary and mainstream for deciding to play Beatles when he’s trying to be the new avant-garde Jesus.

But Dave's news was different than you expected. “They really, really enjoyed your audition. As I thought they would.” You can hear the smile in his voice. "When can you rehearse with us?"

Months after, on your first gig as a fully formed and integrated band, Damon was hit in the face by a guy twice his size, Graham vomited onstage and you and Dave had to take care of both. A beautiful way to close the already exquisite day you had, after you fought with your parents, got kicked out of your childhood home and gave up on entering the Royal Academy of Music two days after you received your acceptance letter featuring rave reviews of your entrance exam.

Dealing with these boys - no, grown-ass men - was hard, but not completely unpleasant. If it were totally unpleasant, you wouldn’t give up on your entire life to embark on such an adventure.

You - plural you - were so gifted and Damon’s compositions were so good. You could see that artsy pretentious mess of an act going somewhere. Of course, you were a bit lost in your life, but so were they, as you ran from city to city meeting new people and trying new things in your journey to fame.

Loneliness, once a close friend, became a distant acquaintance. One you didn’t know anymore.

You confess you were getting worried, though, with how much money you had left on your savings and how much you were spending lately now that your parents weren’t an active part of your life. Wanting to eat something you cannot dream of buying without that money being really useful in a much more critical situation, not having nearly enough money to replace something important that broke or got torn off was frustrating. Some basic things became luxuries out of a sudden.

One day in particular, you very briefly mentioned that you were dying to eat a slice of chocolate cake, but your voice was so small and everyone was so immersed in their duties you thought no one gave two shits to what you said. Two days later, Graham arrived late at rehearsal with a small chocolate cake in his hands, handing it over to you like it was a completely ordinary act. Nothing in the way he acted told you he expected a reward, it was so natural and… gentle. You knew no one in your band could buy a chocolate cake without it being apocalyptic to their personal finances during that time.

That day, you were assured by fate that feeling lost together was better than feeling guided alone.

The band finally got on track - strictly musically speaking. Personally speaking, many contemporaries who followed you at parties and other events described you as an ever-growing odd, annoying and intermittently disarming bunch - and Blur and its members became household names, at least in the UK. It became harder and harder everyday to impose yourself as an entire industry and its target public aimed to tear you down. Men couldn’t understand.

(Graham Coxon was the one who tried the hardest to.)

It was four in the morning. You’ve got used to following your bandmates to hospitals, running away from trouble or knowing when to relish in it. But it was the first time you offered yourself to clean up dried blood from one’s face, given how much you hated seeing the fluid and even fainted when younger whenever exposed to it.

You, so delicately, wipe the saline solution-soaked cotton across Graham’s face, who flinches at the cold sensation on his still sensitive skin. He stares at you with the eyes of a child, and you couldn’t help but give him a slight, warm smile in return, which he retributes. Your face conveyed gratitude and affection towards the one you were taking care of. Your hands still struggled to stay completely still after the surge of adrenaline your body received a few hours ago.

Being the only girl in a massive band, and one the music magazines and mainstream media loved sexualizing, meant having paparazzis in your window in odd hours (not that that’s acceptable in any hour, but you had to lower your standards even more these days), meant having different photographers trying to pressure you to get into all kinds of uncomfortable angles with skimpy-ass dresses and just count on the intervention of your fellow bandmates so they would stop, also having invasive male fans who would try to harass you in any way they could.

Of course the day where one of your bandmates would get into a fist fight with one of these men inserted into these categories would come. And even though they were all protective of you, each in their own peculiar, increasingly contradictory way, Graham’s dedication to it was sometimes commendable.

You were making your way through a small corridor of people on your way to the stage when a random guy cupped one of your breasts. It’s not like the venue was incredibly tight, it could not have been on accident and it made your blood boil. You turned around to scream at him, and Graham, who was just behind you, threw a punch directly towards the man’s face, without thinking twice.

And oh boy, took a lot of people and a sweet amount of time to separate the two after that.

After all was said and done, Graham had a few scratches, a black eye and a cut brow. He kept dodging your many “sorrys”, “you didn’t have to do this” and other expressions of guilt. “You have nothing to be sorry about, he deserved it”, he kept assuring you, like a mantra, just giving in to your pleas when you supplicated to take care of his wounds during intermission and after the show.

“I get why you did what you did, Gra. I hate that you took such a risk because of me, but I understand.” you say, voice cracking from not using it for a while after spending some good minutes in complete silence taking care of him. “However,” you soak another cotton ball in the saline solution a roadie got you, punctuating the word with a squeeze to the cotton to remove excess liquid. “I was worried sick about you. What if he… had a knife or something? You could’ve got seriously injured. Or killed.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m perfectly able to have a good fight,” after wincing from the contact of the cold wet cotton with his dried blood, he purses his lips in a forced, shy smile, trying to light up the mood. He notices your hands are still shaking from the adrenaline, and takes one of them in his bigger ones, trying to calm you down. The fact that he did this for you, coupled with the fear and how tired you felt of having to go through that kind of situation once again, made you cry-laugh from how overwhelmed you felt.

His expression changes to one of pure compassion in an instant. “Hey, don’t--oh my,” he gets up from his chair to embrace you as you pour your frustrations through fat tears running down his shoulder.

“It’s so exhausting,” you mumble, through sobs. “Now I’m putting you in danger too. I feel like I did and I’m still doing everything wrong. I should be the one giving you a shoulder to cry on.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong! Anything at all, I promise you,” he says, tenderly, running his hands through your hair, still holding you tight. “It was his fault! I decided it was the right thing to do. You’re worth the risk. What people have been putting you through is unacceptable.”

“I’m not worth the risk!” You break apart from his arms, trying to get your point across. “What would I do without you if someone killed you? You need to be more careful!”

The silence hangs heavy between you two thanks to the weight of your words.

“You should’ve asked me before you lunged at him, at least. I don’t know.” You wipe your many tears as you move towards the nearest bottle of water to try to calm yourself down. “It’ll never end. I’m so afraid that these situations will get even worse. That,” you motion at his wounds and dirty clothes, “is a bloody tragedy. It’s a tragedy things escalated to this point. You can’t do that forever.”

“This is just a consequence. And something I would do for you in a heartbeat whenever necessary.”

“Graham, I don’t want you to get hurt because--”

“They hurt you. I won’t let you go through that alone. Besides,” he comes closer to you again. “As I already told you, I can take care of myself, most of the time.” He takes your face in his hands, his fingers so delicately running across your cheeks to dry your tears. You knew that gesture wasn’t his way of asking you for anything you weren’t ready to give him yet. He just wanted you to feel safe. “And I want to take care of you.”

“I’m the one cleaning your wounds.”

“A great partnership, I think.” Coxon chuckles softly, and finally gets a smile out of you. As he always does. “And they make me look cool, don’t you think?”

“Shut up.” You giggle, still feeling too emotional to return to the stage. You sigh: “Thank you for being there for me. You know I’m still not very used to it. Just please be safe.”

The roadie returns, a little flustered by interrupting your little moment together. “5 minutes and you’re back, guys.”

“Okay!” You both turn to answer her.

“I’ll be. No need to thank me for anything, Y/N.” He answers, giving your forehead a little kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Give me two minutes. I’ll be right behind you.”

“What’s it like, being the only woman in the band?”

Four eyerolls at once don’t seem to faze the interviewer. She waits for your response.

Apparently the thousand invasive questions regarding Damon’s love life and the same bullshit treatment of women as either rare specimen or sex dolls is what pleases the audience of music TV shows these days.

“What do you think?” is what you say.

“Must be a thrill to have these beautiful boys around you all the time. And we’ve heard you never even took advantage of it!”

You don’t like where this is heading. “Is that… a bad thing? I don’t know what you mean.”

“Perhaps some of our lady viewers might think it is. No judgement though!” She raises her hands. “You do you, it’s just that it’s quite unexpected to see prudes in non-Christian bands. I mean… from what we’ve heard.”

“I’m sorry? What are you trying to say? What did you hear?”

Her tongue clicks while she stares at you with defiance and mischief on her eyes, as she goes a little further and raises her voice so it can overlay yours. “Oh love. You do know what I’m talking about. There’s no need to be ashamed of being a virgin.”

Your cheek burns intensely and the only thing you wished for was for the ground to swallow you whole. Dave and Graham are especially uncomfortable. Damon’s a bit amused. The three knew almost everything there was to know about you. The one topic that surprisingly they didn’t know about is that you’re still a virgin.

They know you’ve been single for a long time. They know that’s part of what draws so much attention and twisted lore regarding you and your past, but that’s not something they felt they needed to know about you at all, and you truly never felt the need to comment about that with any of them, and they haven’t asked. Not even Mr. “the way to be successful in this game is to make all the boys wanna be you and all the girls wanna sleep with you. In your case that’d work in reverse” Damon Albarn.

“Is that even something that should be discussed in an interview about our music? Is that what your boss told you to ask her about?” Dave answers, his tone venomous.

“Musicians are way more than just music. You’re entertainment in every sense of the word.”

“Who told you that about me?” You asked, not sure if you want to know the answer.

“A lovely elderly lady who lives in Elgin Crescent. She knows you so well.”

That’s your mum. That’s how far low your relationship has degraded. You’re not surprised. That doesn’t feel less like a punch on your gut, but you don’t feel like tumbling again. Not today.

“I know who you’re talking about. Tell her I asked her to go fuck herself and burn in hell. In that order.”

“But that’s your--”

“Yes, she is my mum!” If people are going to expose you anyway, then why don’t you do it on your terms? “We’re truly entertainment in every sense of the word, aren’t we. Not everyone’s mum’s a cunt. Some of us aren’t that lucky.”

“You want to be the next Gallagher sister with the spicy remarks?”

“Not sure. But I do want to be the last person you ever get to interview.”

The management of the band wasn’t at all surprised your interview became UK’s topic of the week. People were heavily divided between family is family and we shouldn’t hate our relatives and blood isn’t everything, family can be shitty too. Your bandmates were proud of you. The management was angry but tried to understand, and didn’t press you for further explanations. They suggested a two-week break from everything so Blur could rest their image and start a fresh cycle after that, and you gracefully accepted it.

The whole thing seemed so ridiculous the more you thought about it. Did your mum tell the reporter about that gratuitously? What was their conversation like? How did that even happen?

You became the butt of jokes in some places. You saw other famous people doing challenges between them, countdowns, all sorts of crude remarks. What a pathetic, sad chapter of your career.

You dial Graham, and you feel like your heart was about to burst out of your chest.

“Hey, Gra. It’s me.”

“Hey, Y/N.” He sounds pleasantly surprised. “How's it going?”

“Better, I guess. I have to take my mind off all that chaos though. Are you available right now?”

“Yeah.”

“You’ve been owing me a movie night for quite a while now and I miss spending time with you. Wanna come over?”

“Aww. Sure, I--um. Do you want me to bring anything?”

“I’m pretty sure I got everything we need here--ah… I think I don’t have any more beers.”

“I’ll buy some then. See ya in a few minutes.”

Actually, you couldn’t take all that chaos off your mind because that was the only thing in it. You’re feeling so nervous.

The main reasons sex wasn’t a priority for you until now were:

You didn’t have any real opportunities of losing your virginity in your teens. You were impossibly introspective until, like, 3, 4 years ago, and the way your family worked hasn’t really allowed you to get really close to people. Be it boyfriends, girlfriends or just friends. Anything that threatened to take time off the various tasks and classes your parents assigned to you just couldn’t be part of your life. To be honest, you still struggled a bit to form meaningful connections with people thanks to how you grew up.

The moment you stopped being shy, you noticed it was a real man’s world out there, especially in music, classical or not. You didn’t want anyone to think you fucked your way up to the top, you didn’t want any messy affairs. Also, you had yourself, and you didn’t get all of the hype regarding the concept of screwing someone. But apparently there’s a lot you’ve been missing, given the importance people seem to give to it. After that incident, even though you swore to yourself you wouldn’t give in to any kind of misogynistic pressure, that was one that really got under your skin.

You never really found someone who you felt 100% safe with in that sense until the one who’s about to arrive at your house appeared in your life. Bloody hell, and you don’t even have anything romantic going on. By the time you were a Blur member, you’ve fooled around a bit, but not all the way. You knew how to kiss, knew how to touch yourself and even brought manual satisfaction to some random fool you thought you were into one time. But perhaps this is the time to go all the way. Why not? Everyone knew how close you two were. He made you feel special. He was so kind. And gorgeous. And--

You hear a knock on your door. It’s him. Beers in hand, hair somewhat in place, twitchy as ever.

He comes inside and you feel like your legs will give up anytime. It was not the first time he visited you. It was one of many, actually, and he noticed you were acting… different.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asks after a brief dialogue between you two, after plating some snacks for both of you.

“Graham...” You sigh, being really careful with your words. “What is your perception of me?”

“My perception of you?” He smiles. “I… think you’re great. You’re fun to be around. You’re one of the best musicians I know, if not the best. Why are you asking me that?”

“N-nothing. It’s nothing. Also, I asked the wrong question. What was your first perception of me?”

“Uh… the day of your audition?”

“Exactly. You barely talked to me that day.”

His eyes lower to his own feet. “I was really timid, actually. I wasn’t used to being near any girl, especially one who… w-would spend so much time around me if everything went well.”

You giggle. “I thought you hated me.”

“Never!” his smile turns into a full blown laughter. You melt at his confession. “Also because it seemed like you were trying to read my mind or something.”

“Of course! Because I thought you hated me!” Now that was a laughter you two shared. You do a voice: “‘Why is that pesky girl trying to get in my band?’”

“My goodness, no! I don’t even sound like that - you know what, I changed my mind. You suck. Because, besides the fact you don’t even know what I sound like, you still haven’t told me why you are asking me that in the first place.”

You couldn’t help but notice how he slightly cornered you physically in one of the kitchen corridors. Graham could be really persuasive when he wanted to.

“Okay. Right. Um. I’ve been thinking about some stuff.”

“What, exactly?”

“Everything that happened this month. The great virginity debacle,” you roll your eyes, and he scoffs.

“You don’t own anyone any information about what you do or don't do with your life. Everyone’s being so invasive. That was incredibly childish of the reporter to do, and we talked about that hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, but… you know what, forget it.”

“Tell me, Y/N. I just said that because I want you to know you were not in the wrong.”

“I know. It’s just… I’ve been thinking that maybe it’s silly for me to… keep closing myself for affection. Any kind of affection.”

“What are you talking about?” His brows furrowed in curiosity.

“I’m not sure if it’s the pressure that finally got under my skin, but… I’m willing to learn what all the fuss is about. Maybe it’s silly that I’m still a virgin.”

He bites his lips, still processing what you just said, expression unreadable. Perhaps you’ve treaded a ground you shouldn’t. You step back both literally and figuratively. “I’m sorry I even brought that up--”

“No, no, don’t be.” He assures you. “I’m just… surprised, that’s all. I swear.”

“And...” You know what. You already went too far, so why not go all the way. You’ve already gone way past the point of no return. “I was wondering if… you would… popmycherry?”

His eyes widen, yours still closed. When you finally open them, he’s closer to you again.

If his head was a machine, you’re sure it would be releasing lots of steam and shaking due to overprocessing. You felt like you just ruined everything.

“Y/N, you don’t need to do it if you don’t really want to.”

“But I want it! At first I thought I didn’t, but then I thought...”

“I don’t want to be part of that if you’re just doing it to fulfill weird expectations.”

“But it’s not that. Not just... that. I asked about your perception of me because I really like you, Gra. I think we should be more than friends and I wanted to know what you think about me. And I want to know what the fuss is about, yes, but I’m not telling you that just so I can lose my virginity to prove some point. I’m telling you that because I like you, I want to kiss you, and I think it would be a great idea if you showed me what it’s like. Y-you know, sex.”

“I-I can’t believe it. Did you even have any movie in mind?” His smile’s back, but you’re still not confident about what his answer will be.

“I didn’t. I’m sorry. You don’t have to--”

He sighs. “I was in love with you the moment I first saw you, actually.” He says it like he’s releasing a huge load out of his back, his arms crossed. Now your eyes widen, and you hold your breath without even noticing. “I didn’t want you to feel pressured. I know how you feel, or, felt about relationships, so… there wasn’t any reason for me to tell you that. And what I said about being timid was just half of the truth.”

“Huh?”

“I also was really intimidated by how pretty you looked. You can’t imagine how.”

“No way.”

“It’s true. I felt like I wasn’t even worthy of looking at you, really.”

“You’re joking. That’s mean, Gra.”

“I’m not. I’m really not.” He doesn’t look like he is joking. He looks relieved. “I’m really not. That’s why I’m so surprised by your request.”

“I’m nothing special.”

“You are everything to me. But I can’t accept your offer, not now.”

“Are you… seeing someone? Am I too late?”

“No. Definitely not. I just want you to be sure you’re not doing it because people are saying you should.”

“Graham, I’m a grown woman.”

“I know.”

Graham carefully presses his slightly chapped lips to yours, kissing you for a few precious, heart stopping seconds before pulling away; his voice is impossibly silky when he suggests, “Let’s watch a movie. How about The Godfather? I heard it’s airing tonight. Then, if in two weeks you don’t change your mind, tell me and I’ll be glad to help you with what you want. Do we have a deal?”

“That’s so unfair. I want you so bad.” You whisper.

“Tell me if you still do in two weeks.”

You sigh, defeated. “...Deal.”

You definitely notice the subtle shift in Graham’s personality and actions after that fateful night. If you were already close, both figuratively and literally, it now seemed like he would use any excuse to always touch you, be near you, sometimes tease you. The shift was subtle, though, don’t forget it’s still Graham Coxon we’re talking about - the constant “is it okay if”s or “is it alright if I”s were still there, as careful as ever. You don’t even talk about your deal that entire time, or even kiss again - sometimes you wondered if it was even real or just a fabrication of your mind.

The way he now caressed your hand discreetly when you listened to Damon’s ramblings, the way his hands now went directly to your waist when your games became too handsy, the way he seemed to be madly in love with everything you were and still are from the start - made you realize you were ready for this man to be a consistent part of your life.

The dust of the controversy was settled, and your own intentions were 100% clear to you now. The societal pressure has waned. The need for Graham to be your first persisted. After exactly 2 weeks have passed, you call him again, yearning to share the answer with him.

One beep.

Two beeps.

Three beeps.

Four beeps. “Hello?”

You release a sigh hidden deep inside of your lungs. “Graham, it’s Y/N.”

“Oh. It’s been two weeks.” You could hear the contemplative tone of his voice.

“...Yeah. That’s precisely the reason I’m calling you.”

“Do you still want to…?”

“...Desperately.”

“Ok.” He chuckles, flustered as hell on the other side of the phone, probably one of the prettiest sounds you’ve ever heard. “Right. Ok. Your place or mine?”

“I think there’ll be an element of mystery if I go to your place this time.” You lose some of the constraints this silly shyness has been tying you on. “Do you have everything we might need there?”

“We don’t need a dungeon, you know.”

“The basics.” You make your smile heard.

“I do have… I do have the basics.”

“See you in a few minutes then.”

“Will you want to… ease into it? Or just go straight to it?”

“God, don’t make it awkward!” Your cheeks burn, your smile turning into contagious laughter. “Maybe… I don’t know. Ease into it, I guess? A movie night… but with s-something else?”

“Okay. Sounds good.”

“Alright then. See you.”

“See you.”

You don’t choose any particularly fancy or sexy clothes, instead settling for a slightly oversized yellow striped shirt he gave you as a birthday present some months ago and some skirt that fit you well. He wasn’t one to lavish his loved ones with gifts all the time, but few things were as precious as the look on his face whenever he saw you wearing something he gave you or, hell, even eating something he paid for you. You’re thrilled to see it again when he opens the door for you, it easing some of your deepest doubts.

2001: A Space Odyssey is already playing on the TV when you arrive. Despite it being one of your favorite movies of all time, and his, you’re not mad it was already halfway through when you arrived. It wasn’t your main priority to rewatch it for the 17th time tonight.

He offers you some wine, which you accept to ease the nerves. You sit on his couch, and he shares the cozy space with you, now mindlessly throwing one of his arms around your shoulders. You cuddle up to him, and everything seems peaceful in the world for a while.

The tip of his fingers softly caress your lifted knee, absentmindedly. You couldn’t help but notice how well his body fits with yours, how your skin was apparently made for him to touch, and the anxiety rumbles in your stomach like a storm in a wild wavy sea. After some minutes, you raise your head, his big brown eyes meeting yours as if asking you a silent question. You leaned up a bit more to press your lips to his, in a silent answer. The sweetness in him makes this moment as precious as every other moment you ever shared with him. His hands enter your hair, making you shiver a bit from the unfamiliarity and the electricity of it all - but it doesn’t sway you from deepening the kiss, wanting more of his taste, more of this, more of him.

“Do you wanna take this to the bed?” He whispers, after noticing your moans were becoming more frequent and needy. You nod, and you are taken by surprise when he carries you bridal style to it, hiding your excited giggles in his broad shoulders.

Graham wasn’t exactly the most organized man in the world - so the fact that his bedroom was now impossibly tidy was something that positively caught your attention. He put some planning into this. He lays you down and you part your legs, beckoning him to meet you between them. He does, and you go back to the breathtaking makeout session. You notice he’s holding himself back a bit, taking his time, his warm tongue moving smoothly, not hurriedly, against yours. His self control falters a bit though, given how he can’t stop grinding against you. You follow the rhythm of his hips a bit timidly and not nearly as in sync as you’d really like, though the pressure his covered cock is creating against your core can already be felt and some particular thrusts are able to fill at least partially the aching, wet need growing within you.

“How do you feel about oral?” He asks, breath warm near your ear, his voice raspy and spent by his desire for you.

“Um… It would be my first time receiving or doing it.”

“Would you like me to go down on you?”

“Wow. I never thought I would hear you saying something like that.” You smile, still assimilating the situation you’re in, trying not to show how badly his voice is affecting you. “Sure.”

“I never thought I would get to propose this to you. Aren’t we full of surprises lately.” He smiles back, warmly. He notices your hands trembling a bit from how anxious you are while you’re taking off your underwear with his help, and as he lowers himself to where you need him most, he takes your hands in his as an act of reassurance. “Tell me what you like. Tell me if what I’m doing works for you. I want this to be a great experience.”

“You want me to get addicted to you, that’s what you want,” He chuckles, lovingly kissing your thigh as a reply. “Okay, Gra. Guess I’ll find out along the way.”

You quickly take a peak below you to see the lower half of his face disappear in the middle of your thighs. The sight alone sets your fire ablaze, as he hooks his arms around your thighs and lifts you closer to his mouth, his lips ghosting over the curls between your legs tantalizingly and his breath catching when your hips jerk forward.

As he begins his ministrations, you immediately notice it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt. That feeling was completely alien to you. It was even wetter than you expected, and weird, but powerfully pleasant. Before this exact moment, you had a firm belief that hardly anyone else would make you feel the same way, or better, than you do yourself, but apparently you were very wrong. Thankfully you were wrong. “My god,” you gasp as the flat of his tongue drags over your folds, too much and not enough, and you jerk at the contact. “This is great. So weird, but-- great.”

He moans at your response, his movements carefully enthusiastic. He works his tongue between your folds and traces up to curl the tip of it around your clit, and it’s quite endearing and madly arousing to see how he eats out you like you’re the sweetest and tastier dessert he has ever tasted. You involuntarily buck against him with a desperate sound the moment he moves his tongue and lips in a particularly wicked way, something that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by him, but you still feel the need to highlight in case it didn’t - “That. Keep doing that, please,”

And he does. The building of this climax is also different than the ones you already had by your own hands, and is more coy. As he sees the drops of sweat sliding along your soft skin and the expressions on your face as you get lost in this new but enchanting sensations, his hesitation and self-control fades away; there’s nothing uncertain in the way he buries his face in your cunt now, nothing restrained in the groan he lets out as he devours you and drinks you down as if you’re the first stream of water he has seen in days.

His tongue glides deeper in your folds again and again, swirling up through the wetness you’re coated with to tease at your clit while he grunts and strains closer, squeezing your thighs with both hands tight. The wave of heat inside of you is cresting so fast, you don't even know how to tell him, how to signal that you’re nearly done for and, in the end, it happens too fast to even try. He sucks at your clit, circling it with his tongue, once, twice, and then you’re crying out, shaking underneath him, trying to keep your thighs from clenching too hard around his head as he laps you through it with with urgent whimpers and moans, as if he cannot have enough of you.

You’re still trembling when he rises, the look on his face revealing to you how proud he feels by making you feel this way. It looks so good on him.

You fail miserably at the simple task of connecting words together after that, choosing instead to collect your remaining strength, prop yourself up and beckon him again to keep kissing him and learn, through his talented tongue, how you taste. He kisses the thin fabric of the shirt at your chest that covers you from view, your throat, your jaw, and before he reaches your impatient lips, he notes, sinfully, “Seems like you enjoyed yourself, love.”

“That was… unbelievable. Stars, I want to make you feel good too. Please show me how.”

“Keep kissing me,” he begs, voice still strained from how aroused he is. “I want to be inside you so bad. Let’s get you prepared.” You’re still so sensitive, you tread on overstimulation when his fingers lightly touch your clit, making you break the kiss in a hiss. He traces a line on your folds, inspecting the impact his mouth had on you. “So wet for me.”

“Bit slower, Gra,” He complies to your breathy plea, his fingers now more tame as he slowly spreads your wetness throughout your pussy. He stretches towards the nightstand to grab a bottle of lube, interrupting his contact to spread some on his fingers before unhurriedly slipping his middle finger inside of you. The coldness of the gel makes you shiver in surprise, the easiness brought by it very welcomed. Again - the sensation is odd. Completely unfamiliar. The feeling of having something inside of you for the first time, going further than you ever dared to try, probing, exploring; the coldness of the lube clashing against your burning hot cunt. But it also felt nice. The focused look on his face was adorable, he looked like he was a scientist in the middle of very complex research.

Despite the panting, the messy hair and the fire in his eyes.

Your body already has a lot of new sensations to process simultaneously, so when he asks you to take off your bra and shirt so his tongue can work on your nipples - which you gladly accept, you feel like you’re on sensual overload. His tongue, again, so talented, takes your mind off the slight burning you feel when he introduces his ring finger to your soaked, throbbing core, his focused, carefully overpowering and constant stimulation driving you insane.

“Does it feel good?” He asks, voice muffled by your breast. You nod, carried by the wave of pleasure sweeping you.

“Yes. God, yes.” You pant, tangling your fingers tightly on his thick hair as an encouragement, a desperate sound escaping from your lips the moment he reaches a certain point within you you didn’t even know existed, hot mouth continuing to lick and suck your nipple. Even though you were spent by your last orgasm, he was indeed getting you addicted to those new feelings, and even though this was heavenly, truly heavenly, you needed more. “Gra, I’m ready, I think.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Please.”

Releasing your nipple from his lips with a sounding pop, he eagerly frees himself from his trousers - hard as a brick - and puts protection and lubrication on, swiftly positioning himself between your thighs while stroking himself to the sight in front of him. You motion to take off your skirt, and he holds your hand, not letting you. “Don’t. It’ll be really hot to fuck you in this.” He confesses, giving your forehead a kiss in a very different context than before. He aligns his forehead with yours, each of your lips just barely touching while you breathe each other’s air. He looks deep into your eyes, slowly running the tip of his cock between the slick folds of your pussy, coating himself in the remnants of your pleasure. “Do you trust me?”

You trust me to know your limits? Not to go any further if you don’t really want me to?

“Absolutely.”

The only response you get from him is a shuddering, helpless moan into your mouth and you hold him tighter to you, grinding your still sensitive cunt up against his cock while he pulls hard at the soft fur next to your head. You feel your soaking pussy lips part around the solid curve of his length and gradually coat the underside of him in slick with every gentle circle and roll your hips make, as he finally pulls away from your mouth to drop his forehead to your neck. He then, very slowly, penetrates you, stopping when he hears the noises you make indicating you’re struggling to adjust to his presence. Out of everything you’ve felt in the last minutes, this was by far the most painful sensation. “This-- is new,” you note, your face completely incapable of hiding the discomfort. He also notices that.

“Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?”

“It’s okay. I’ll get used to it.”

“It’s not supposed to be about endurance, you know.” He says, a bit breathless and worried, caressing your hair. “Tell me when it’s okay to move. Or if you feel too much pain.”

After some long seconds and some deep breaths, you say: “Okay. Go on.”

“As you wish.”

He moves inside you at a very slow pace, the lubrication clearly making it easier for you to handle it. It still hurts, significantly, but the sensation of being filled is also surprisingly arousing.

His hand moves to your sensitive clit again in small, measured circles, your little moans being a mixture of the pain of penetration and the sheer ecstasy of seeing him falling apart because of you. The way his chest heaves while the drops of sweat start pearling his fair skin, the furrowed brows and broken groans, the thickness of him as he rests heavy up against your entrance, the way his voice presses deliciously tight in his throat as he gasps out into the quiet room - everything’s making your chest burst in love and satisfaction. You tighten your grip around him and roll your hips up into his cock, letting it break you open nice and slow; it stretches you wide with a deliciously sharp fullness and pleasure rips through you, and Graham becomes even more vocal as he picks up a steady and gradually faster pace. He turned all of your keys, it’s about time you turn some of his.

“Graham, deeper,” you whimper, continuing to tighten your legs and hoist yourself up, lifting your hips to take his cock deeper inside you. His name rips itself from your throat while Coxon clenches his jaw and starts to lose himself in the pleasure, holding you down into the bed while he allows your desperation to guide him to the perfect angle and speed to sate you. He found denying you to be impossible.

He snarls and curses as he holds you down and rails you, determined to make you sing again before he finishes, and to his delight, your heightened sensitivity gives him what he wants. And this time, he couldn't hold on.

Graham kisses you one last time as he groans and gives in, head dropping to your neck again. You didn’t reach a second climax, but stars, what an experience you just had.

When he comes back to himself enough to realise he still had you practically folded in half, he carefully pulls his softening cock free, taking the condom off and taking the strands of hair out of your face as you struggle to catch your breath. You suggest a shared bath, a suggestion he gladly accepts.

Too tired and too sore for pillow talk, comfortable silence falls as your hand finds his, and you lay, listening to each other’s breathing slowly settle.

I could get used to his little snore on my chest, is the last thought that twinkles on your mind before you fall asleep snuggled with him.

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