#and how this impacts their psychology

[mythalism]

genuinely curious how the writers and larger dragon age audience would treat thom rainier if instead of being appropriately* repentant and putting himself in prison he blew up a major orlesian government building to instigate a chevalier rebellion or tried to have someone do some necromantic blood magic ritual involving uncertain danger and possible sacrifices to bring the innocent children he ordered killed back to life

[dehautdesert]

I agree with the assessment that he's tired of dealing with it, and that it makes more sense pragmatically to just endure the pain once (though he doesn't replace them all at once, he's doing it bit by bit over the course of several years) rather than having them fail on him randomly.

But, even with his own bones he also spends his childhood riding and swimming and engaging in various shenanigans, and both Aral and Piotr think that he has good chances of passing the academy physical (given perfect written exam scores) in TWA (he only fails the exam because he wanted to show off to that other guy who accused him of nepotism), and he survives as a mercenary for years with his original bones, so we can assume that his issues, while certainly inconvenient and not to be underestimated, are not that debilitating.

As for the rest - those are all things he actively chose for himself, because he chose a profession where people routinely try to break each other's bones. He doesn't need to know exactly how to turn in order to absorb the least amount of damage in a fight, he doesn't need to know how to assess when it's necessary to break his own bones for a mission. And he doesn't get synthetic bones because he wants to enjoy himself riding Fat Ninny without worrying about breaking them, he does it because of his job. He could stay at home and be a doctor or a politician or an entrepreneur like Mark (living proof that there's no innate "soldierness" in Miles, as Mark has his exact same genes). Hell, he could even be a fake mercenary admiral and just lead from the tactics room instead of the front lines! This is the bloody-minded determination part: he wants this to the point that he will inflict pain on himself to get it, and I love the juxtaposition of, I guess, paradoxically putting oneself (or at least one's desires) first but also putting oneself dead last that this implies.

BUT, on a bit of a higher level, why does he want to be a soldier so desperately? Could it be that it's because his culture overemphasizes military prowess to the loss of everything else? They have an Emperor and he sits on a military camp stool instead of a throne, emphasizing the military as the backbone of power and societal hierarchy in this country.

But even then, there are plenty of people in Barrayar who are willing to put in their recommended ten years for formality's sake and go on to do something else (like Tien), or who manage to be useful despite not being military (Byerly) or who do desk jobs for the entirety of their military career (Ivan). Miles is suicidal when he can no longer be a soldier and endure people twice his height regularly trying to break his bones.

Could this be because his family consists entirely of soldiers? To the point that Piotr and Aral are completely defined by their military prowess? Piotr did so many things for the people of his district, but that's not what Piotr talks about and what he is known for and what Miles knows about him - to everyone, Piotr is the brilliant general of the Cetagandan occupation. Aral makes beautiful art but really he's the guy who conquered Komarr with a strategy so brilliant he wrote a book about it. Hell, Miles's father fell in love with Miles's mother because of her being a soldier with soldierly qualities - he calls her "Captain" as an endearment. Cordelia built schools and hospitals and raised an emperor all while raising Miles with his plethora of medical issues but she's known and admired for her one singular act of violence: killing Vordarian.

To Miles, being a soldier is inextricably tied to being loved and respected and valued, to being good enough and worthy enough for his loved ones. And this is literally the first thing we are told about him in TWA and the point is repeated over and over again throughout the series. And while people can tell him that they love and appreciate him anyway, and mean it, every piece of evidence his surroundings have ever given him kind of points in the opposite direction, and he's smart enough to perceive that.

And this is such a fundamental thing for him that you kinda can't assume that it doesn't tip the balance when deciding whether he should get artificial bones - after all, it's kind of a big deal how often he anticipates himself being in situations where they can be an inconvenience.

And it's also telling how Miles, who is preternaturally good at going around an obstacle to get what he wants, and also at playing at his exact strengths, never even thinks of making things easier for himself by choosing another path, he just pummels through the wall and then through the pain this causes, because subjectively he has no other choice even though objectively he does (he's a wealthy, well-bred and well-connected, charming man of above average intelligence). And he never even thinks of exploring WHY he does it that way, like a fish doesn't notice the water it's surrounded by.

Sometimes I think about how Miles Vorkosigan went through a series of likely traumatic medical procedures to replace every long bone in his body with a more durable, synthetic one. Of his own free will. He didn't have to do this. He himself admits that it hurt like a bitch. And keep in mind that his childhood is already defined by a series of long, painful surgeries that he didn't choose.

I have a lowkey obsession with the way prosthetics and artificial limbs and similar things are treated in narratives, and to me this act is THE essence of both his personality and the way he perceives his culture.

He could have chosen any other job and likely excelled at it but military achievement is so important in his culture, in his family, for him personally, that he will cut himself open and excavate the fragile bones from his body limb by limb to replace them with sturdier, artificial ones so that he can be a good enough soldier.

I love the mix of implications present in this and tbh it's kind of the essence of my fixation with this kind of narrative device (which is why this is my favourite book series!). It's that mix of stone-cold pragmatism (I want to be good at this->I need better bones to be good at this->I will replace my bones) and raw, desperate, bloody-minded determination (I want this so bad and nothing will stop me from getting it, not even myself; I am ready to cut myself open and mutilate myself if it means getting what I want), and total self-annihilation (I am not good enough, so I need to put myself through massive pain to fit the criteria of good enough, and my pain doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things because without this I'm worthless anyway). Which one is present in which percentage? Is he lowkey returning to what traumatized him as a child, except this time it's his choice and he's the one who's in control? It's up for debate I guess. But I love how it tells you everything you need to know about the man. All the rest of his behavior is just handwaving to keep people's eyes away from the essence of him, and this is it.

[creekfiend]

I have indeed been simply deleting asks that I receive about this, but I just want to say. I find it so discouraging that people are so thoroughly nation-state pilled that they think that the only way for millions of one group of people to be safe living in a geographical region is the existence of a nation state which is actively enacting ethnic cleansing on the other people in that region. GOD that's fucking depressing I'm so fucking depressed.

[iztea]

finally watched hannibal in the year of our lord 2025. a life altering experience. it's everything to me. top 2 fav tv shows

[painom]

Hello! Can I just say that I really appreciate you doing this? I've always been a big fan of your analyses and your ability to get to the root of the characters. Thank you for continuing to let us read your wonderful thoughts and stories.

On your old blog, you discussed your headcannons for Lyney, one being his tendency to forget things like where he put his wallet because him and his mind are very busy. Unfortunately, I didn't save the post (my biggest regret ahhhhh!) and I would love to read your analysis once more. If it's okay with you, could you go over your headcannons for Lyney again? The old, the new, whatever's on your mind and whatever you're willing to share. Thank you so much!

Thank you for the kind ask, anon! Here you go!

New Lyney Headcanons

Self-focused - Though he never seems like it, those that know Lyney well know that he’s often running low on sleep. And really, he has no one to blame but himself. During the day he’s often distracted with magic shows, helping people, little tasks around the hotel, running missions for Father, and much more. And at night? He can often be found alone in his room planning new tricks, arranging missions for his siblings, studying to become the next “king” of the House, and things of the sort. If Lynette and Freminet didn’t keep an eye on him, no doubt he would stay up the whole night if given the chance! Those two welcome all the help they can get. 

Relationship-focused - When it comes to his relationship with you, Lyney never lies. You know he would never do that to you. And sometimes, the knowledge almost lulls you into a false sense of security. Yet you know better. You’re smarter than that. Where Lyney doesn’t lie, he omits. Half-truths so easily fall from his mouth as drops of rain from the sky. Your comments of concern are often brushed off and your questions redirected. As much as you try, you know the truth. He doesn’t want you to know. He doesn’t want you to shoulder his burdens with him. 

old lyney headcanons below!

Would Lyney be honest with you?

With his outgoing and fun personality, it oftentimes is easy to get caught within his flow. Lyney is the charming sort, after all, that one may very well forget that he is subject to the same struggles as the rest. Get to know him well enough, though, and you will quickly realize that this is not a fact he wishes others to know. More than a desire, he needs to be seen as someone in control, as someone without weakness. That’s his role as the big brother. And if that means lying, avoiding, and omitting the truth to accomplish it, then an accomplished performer like himself will do what he must. 

Does Lyney prefer to pursue or be pursued?

With a penchant for flair and dramatics, it’s clear to see Lyney prefers to pursue the people he’s interested in. Really, it’s one of the things he goes all out. With a trick up his sleeve, he won’t hesitate to dazzle you with flowers pulled from nowhere and fireworks from his tophat. He wants you to be enchanted. He wants you to be impressed! You are, aren’t you? You like it, don’t you? So focused on charming you that he often loses sight of much else. Fun fact, should you attempt to turn the tables, however, you can expect his mask of self-confidence to fall to reveal a rather flustered expression beneath. 

Headcanons

Self-focused - If there’s one thing that’s true about Lyney, it is that he is a very busy person. As a person with multiple masks and roles, his thoughts are often preoccupied with House missions, performances, new tricks, and things of the like. So, much to the dismay of others, it’s easy for things to become buried under the multitude of other tasks he needs to take care of. How often the simple things become forgotten—where he last left his wallet, tea time with his siblings, the sale on storybooks at the bookstore. During those times, he really can’t help but appreciate his siblings and their ability to keep him on track. Really, he doesn’t know what he’d do without them!

Relationship-focused - It doesn’t hit you at first, but it doesn’t take you very long to notice how hard Lyney tries for your relationship. Normally this would be a good thing, but it is different with Lyney. Every day he tries to charm you. Every day he attempts to enchant you. You tell him he doesn’t need to try so hard, but that only seems to light a fire beneath him to do even more. You see it in his eyes. He needs to know you are still in awe of him, that you like him as much as he does you. And then it sinks in, doesn’t it? He doesn’t trust you. He doesn’t trust your feelings for him. He’ll never show his true face to you.

old tags for this post: #okay let’s talk lyney for a bit i think the biggest thing to know about lyney is that at his core he is an insecure person insecure and anxious #imo he’s extremely attached to his title of ‘big brother’ that he needs to fulfill the duties if such he needs to protect his siblings and be a person others can rely on #this belief is so strong that he refuses to rely on arlecchino for help and snaps at freminet for trying to get him to open up #he really cares about the way he’s perceived #remember when the traveler found out he’s part of the fatui and he spends his time bending over backwards to try to get them to trust him ‘like me! like me! please. i’m trustworthy i’ll never lie to you please!!’ #honestly imo that’s just one if his faults like lyney is unstable #idk what possessed arlecchino to make him her successor like he’d crack under pressure #lynette is a way better option #but anyway bc of these things he would not trust his partner in a relationship #he wouldn’t rely on them he’d never feel secure which would prompt him to keep trying too hard to ensure he’s still the person he thinks you fell in love with #the most important thing to remember with lyney is that he is a performer and the face he shows to the world is essentially a mask

What’s Lyney’s breaking point in a relationship?

It’s hard to imagine, really. With how much Lyney may seem in love, the idea there’s a point a relationship would be too much for him is hard to believe. But when you really think about it, his breaking point is simple. As strong as his feelings may be for you, his devotion to his family and its cause outweighs everything else. Should your relationship with him ever reach a time where it encroaches upon that which is the most precious to him, then there’s nothing more he can do than let you go.

old tags for this post: #i think the key thing to take in here is that lyney cannot function without his family he is extremely reliant upon them to the extent that he will become unstable without them #just look at the archon quest when wriothesley captured his siblings any and all logic completely went out the window #lyney is an anxious insecure mess and the only thing that holds him together is playing the role he has to as big brother #if your relationship with him ever reaches the point that you transcend into being counted as his family.... he will have no breaking point #the breaking point will be his mind or body. whichever breaks first

[evocatiio]

if chibnall was the one writing this season you lot would be talking VERY differently

[ymirgel]

𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐁𝐘 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆. encircling grief &. remorse is met at the end of yet another tankard filled with whatever alcohol she could find. desperate to quiet the plighted screams of terror; mothers grossly sobbing their tears unto blood-caked cobblestone. bodies of their husbands hung ruthlessly at the gallows in minrathous's square, parading a horrifying statement intending to ward off defiance against venatori usurpers.

their cruelty never ending; she vividly recalls the pile of bodies during her search for key vendors she's cordially acquainted prior to the devastation wrought upon their home. no mortal can forget fetid stench of decomposing cadavers, especially one whose foot is always six feet from entering her own mental grave.

the beggars plead for coin along the path with only cardboard and wood as their makeshift homes. echoes of the desperate voicing concerns over their missing children, praying for their safety. these lucid recounts gradually dilute from increasing static droning her mind; an audible stream from her own conscience reverberates:

it's all your fault. you failed as a protector of the living.

unable to withstand stomaching this recollection, ymir's head tilts back in tandem to lofting high her tankard; hefty swig barrels down parched throat, accompanied by an exhaled grunt. slamming it upon the table. green peripherals steadily cast toward the lit fireplace, focusing on the sound of crackling wood. as engulfed as her heart is, she swore swift vengeance upon these zealots. an ever-burning quest to eliminate all opposition; heretical foes meeting justice at the end of her skull flail.

she envisions it. like a new movie clip, transitioning to gauntlets caked in crimson. one cannot shed away the blood that stains their hands. another fleeting foreground depicts her boot crushing the skull of a venatori—a memory of what happened after the bulwark returned to minrathous, witnessing the consequences of her actions. she could have saved neve's city. caught in her assumptions that the shadow dragons could fend for themselves. oh, how wrong she clearly was.

and so, wallowing and mulling over the past, yet again, as she looks on in the vicious flames—much akin her own emboldened heart. to quench this thirst for justice. ymir's visage hardens, molding a scowl. motionless, regrets freeze her. brooding in solitude. conceiving her next course of action for revenge.

[wallbeatjournal]

keeping Kevarchie ALIVE. kevin ships dont get talked about nearly enough what about kevhead. personally i think jughead would rather kill himself than admit he's sexually attracted to kevin & it'd be incredibly amusing to watch them psychologically torture each other in an "ugh this is the guy i like???" kind of way. i cant tell if their specific brand of pretentiousness would clash or make them the most annoying power couple to ever exist

oh my godddd they would be atrocious. can you just imagine them writing/directing a play together?? bickering over kevin's vision for some theatrical adaptation of jughead's original comic or short story until they're so mad their only choice is to work it out nasty? (it's NOT homoerotic, kevin, stop calling it homoerotic. this story is about FRIENDSHIP that's practically me and archie right there!!)

and yeah jughead wouldn't want to acknowledge it bc it's so on-the-nose and beneath him and that would infuriate gay kevin who has endured so so much repressed closet case bullshit in his gay lifetime. i don't think they could stand to actually date. jughead would ultimately write a mean play about their liaisons and kevin would write a spiteful score/musical book for it and they'd pretend it was all so veiled in metaphor that nobody would ever realize what had happened (everyone would realize. it would be so blatant and cringe).

...or something like that.

[seraphdreams]

a lot of you are not understanding the magnitude of this genocide. when a permanent ceasefire and end to the occupation/genocide happen (which it will, inshallah), it’s not like palestinians can go back to living life as they used to.

where will they get their food if crops/plant life have been destroyed by the idf?

where will children and adults learn if schools have been destroyed by the idf?

where will they rest if their homes have been destroyed by the idf?

where will the sick and injured go if hospitals have been destroyed by the idf?

a generation of people will be deprived of basic necessities for years to come once palestine is rebuilt. how will they live? how can they go back?

[transmasc-rose]

Like I do think River and the Doctor's romance was built up poorly. However. You see. I like her.

[basil-eats-rocks]

There will be a day of calm, after years of pain, and years of absorbing cruelty from others, and years of wondering if you deserve to love the people you love.

You will feel a sense of security, of peace. That doesn't mean yesterday was your last day angry. Those days don't stop. It just means today is the first day that you don't feel like all of that will end you.

Those people? The ones who took and took and twisted your memories and mind into weapons just to hurt you even more? They will fade into nothing. It will still ache, the way an empty stomach does, but you will be fuller in every other way.

There will be that day. Maybe it's years from now, but maybe it's tomorrow. And guess what?

You will get there.

[faggling]

I love taking care of people omggg 😍😍😍

[mystacoceti]

the confusion anglophone cognitive researchers of the first world create when they describe literacy of Latin script writing systems as general human literacy leaves a really obvious gap for whole language advocates to say "wHaT aBoUt ChInEsE??", only I don't think there's anything about written mandarin that would actually fundamentally contradict much of the research?

the claim by many researchers is that it's too hard to remember by brute force the 60000 odd words that a literate person needs to know for english — which is what the phonetic decoding is for, to ease the burden on memory with an extremely robust mnemonic tool. the only difference between hanzi and latin script would be the number of characters you have to memorize, ~3000 versus 26 (for english). and where children learning to read English will learn a handful of sight words by rote memory, the mandarin students would learn those characters as the sight words they often are. the modular aspect of both written and spoken chinese is probably what makes it doable yet hard, as opposed to nigh impossible. I assume it's only that first step of 3000 that's the real bitch, but after that it's all combining characters, like in english

[psycherprince]

third hot take of the day is that yes "boycott fatigue" is. yikes. but we're not doing anyone any favors by pretending large boycotts don't take any effort whatsoever. like we talk abt "invisible labor" in the household when talking abt feminism, which is the cognitive load of knowing what has to get done even if the tasks are divided, and having to keep track of who is doing what (wrt childcare) and the preferences of your family when cooking/grocery shopping/etc. Other ppl have explained this better than me but the point is. It does take cognitive effort to keep track of what you can and can't buy, and which companies own what, etc etc.

We can acknowledge that yeah it does take effort and yeah it can be annoying that you have to make some kind of change, but also still maintain that complaining abt that right now is insanely tactless and irrelevant. Like yeah you DO have to remind yourself not to buy sabra hummus or the starbucks brand creamer or whatever but like there's a genocide yknow get some perspective

[parsleymusic]

the urge to respond to critique about portrayal of unpolitically correct attitudes or phrases or actions or whatever in regards to mental illness with "what if I told you that it's not my job to tell my readers that when my character says stuff like 'my binge eating disorder is not as bad as my brother's bipolar + PTSD combination; he has to win at something' that it's Bad and the Wrong Attitude to have when it's largely a tongue in cheek joke about living with mental illness and watching the people you love experience a different flavor that is also worse

[t-u-i-t-c]

Lay Down My Body and Soul, The Whereabouts of the Decision