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sheerfreesia007 · 2 months ago

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Parade Shenanigans

Pairing: Lee Know x Reader

Word count: 1,484

Content warnings: Fluff, corny pick up lines, mention of alcohol

Summary: It’s St. Patrick’s Day and you spot Minho in the parade that is being held in the city. What happens when you try out a few more pick up lines on the hardened officer?

Part One: Drunken Teasings

You beamed as you walked out of the pub with your group of girlfriends, every single one of you wearing something green for Saint Patrick’s Day as you all bar hopped in the city. Today the city was celebrating Saint Patrick’s Day and your group of girlfriends had planned a whole day of bar hopping while taking in the city parade.

As you walked along the sidewalk with your friends your eyes kept darting over to the line of metal guardrails that blocked off the parade route. Your group had started early on your bar hop route so the parade was further back but you had made sure to keep track of where the parade was because there was a certain officer who was walking in the parade and you were eager to see him all dressed up in his uniform. Smiling softly to yourself you let your friends drag you into another bar along the route for green tinted beer and hopefully another set of green beads.

*-*-*-*

The time had finally come and you were eagerly dragging your girlfriends out of the current bar you had been in with avid eyes as you found a spot along the guardrails. Your hands gripped the top railing tightly as your eyes darted over the people walking in the parade. You had been watching the news feed while in the bar and had spotted your target for today. He had looked so handsome on the television screen and you were excited to finally see him today since he hadn’t been able to come visit you in a week.

Ever since your first meeting with Officer Lee and flirting with him so unabashedly you had captured his attention. When he had met up with you outside of the precinct after you were released from the drunk tank he had taken you out for breakfast at a dinner not too far from the police station. The two of you had spent hours in that diner just talking and laughing with each other. When the waitress had given you both her fifth disapproving frown as the time rolled into the lunch hour, Officer Lee, or Minho as you had come to know him as, walked you home to your apartment and exchanged numbers with you at your door.

That had been three months ago and ever since that morning the two of you had been slowly navigating a tentative relationship between each other. Minho had confessed to you that he wasn’t sure if a relationship would work with his career but he was willing to try if you were. And that was how the two of you had started dating.

It had been a week since the two of you had been able to see each other and you were excited to finally see him even if it was while he was working. Focusing your eyes on the banner that a few junior officers are holding you can’t help but grin widely.

”Hey isn’t that the precinct we were taken to months ago after that night in the club?” One of your girlfriends asks and you nod your head excitedly as your eyes dart around the officers dressed in their parade uniforms trying to spot your officer. Suddenly your eyes landed on him and your grin broadened on your face, he hasn’t spotted you and you find this the perfect opportunity. Just as you open your mouth to call out to him his partner back from that day spots you and grins excitedly as his eyes widen almost comically.

”Hey Officer Lee!” You call out loudly as you cup your hands around your mouth to make your voice louder for him to hear. He turns his head and spots you on the sidelines as he continues to walk slowly with his friends. When his eyes land on you they widen slightly before narrowing and then rolling knowing what you’re going to do. “If you were a fine, I’d plead guilty just to spend more time with you!” You call out and he scowls softly at you but you can see the red tint blooming on his ears as his friends burst out into laughter while your girlfriends all duck their heads not wanting to catch his attention anymore than you have.

”Oh my god, can you not?!” Hisses one of your girlfriends. “He’s going to arrest us again.”

”We weren’t arrested, we were held in the drunk tank.” You counter easily as he grin widely at your boyfriend while he shakes his head quickly at you. But there’s no stopping you once you’re on a roll especially when you’re flirting with him, he should know better.

”Hey Officer Lee!” You call out again and Minho ducks his head slightly as his friends all stare at you eager to hear your next pick up line. “Can you call for backup? I need help dealing with my feelings for you!” Minho’s ears are turning a bright red now as he gets closer and closer to you while avoiding eye contact with you as his friends all cheer and holler around him at your pick up line.

”I’ll be backup for you sweetheart!” Calls his partner, the shorter one out of his friends and Minho turns to him with a dark scowl that has his friend giggly loudly as he holds his hands up in faux surrender. You watch Minho with rapt focus as you ready for your last pick up line for him, he’s going to pass you soon and you want to make a lasting impression on him so that he can get through the rest of the parade with you on his mind.

”Hey Officer Lee!” You call out one more time and your girlfriends all groan around you while his friends watch you eagerly. “Can you help me? My heart is under arrest, and you’re the only one who can bail me out!” You call out to him with a triumphant grin on your face.

But soon the grin is falling from your face as you watch Minho suddenly break away from his friends in the parade and make a beeline for you with a soft scowl on his face. You grip the railing tightly in your hands as you pray that he actually won’t arrest you for harassment or something.

”Ever been cited for being too attractive?” He asks as he gets close enough to you for you to hear him and you tilt your head to the side in confusion before he speaks up again as he stops to stand right in front of you. “Consider this your first warning.” He finishes his pick up line and your eyes widen with delight at the fact that he just flirted with you in public using a corny pick up line.

He surprises you even further when he cups your face quickly before leaning forward and crashing his lips to yours in a heated loving kiss. His friends all cheer and whoop loudly while your girlfriends all squeal with delight around you. You return his kiss just as lovingly as you melt against him and feel his smile through the kiss. When he pulls away from you to breathe he smirks down at you while you stare up at him dreamily with a dazed smile on your face.

”You flirted back finally.” You say happily in a soft dazed tone making him smile softly down at you.

“I just needed to warm up to it a little.” He admits softly and you beam up at him happily. “I’ll see you at the end of the parade? Come to the precinct and I’ll take you out for lunch?” He asks hopefully and you nod your head at his request while still smiling dreamily up at him. He smirks once more at you before leaning down to press a quick kiss to your nose. He then turns and runs back to his friends in the parade and you watch him go.

”So when were you going to tell us that you’re dating Officer Dark and Stormy?” Asks your girlfriend excitedly and he grin as you turn to them as they all watch you.

”Had to make sure I locked him in first.” You say dismissively as you shrug your shoulders and they all grin and giggle at you.

”As if that wasn’t going to happen?” Asks one sarcastically before they all turn to see Minho looking back at you with a soft smile on his face before he turns back to his friends. “Man is simping hard for you.” You grin widely at her words before you link arms with her and begin to guide her towards another bar that they wanted to go to.

”C’mon, let’s keep going before I ditch you all for Officer Dark and Stormy.” You tease them delightedly as they all laugh at your words.

SKZ Taglist: @intartaruginha, @kayleefriedchicken, @babigriin, @simpforleeknaur, @inlovewithstraykids

#my writing #stray kids #skz #skz x reader #lee know x reader #lee minho x reader #lee know #lee minho

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hamletteprinceofdenmark · 10 months ago

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Transcript of Shelby's Video:

CW: Abuse

:readmore:

Hello! I don't know if you can even hear it, I put on, like, light jazz in the background because it seemed awkward being quiet, but I don't think you can hear it, so I'm just gonna turn it off. Um, hello! Um, welcome! We are in emote only because I'm just gonna be talking today, and then I'm gonna go! I'm gonna go!

Um, yeah, it was very, very low. There's, there's no need. I just, it felt weird leaving you in silence, but I'm here, so — Hello! Um, I want to talk about something today that, um, very nervous. I feel sweaty. I had a sweater on, I had to take it off. Um, I'm gonna try and just, I wrote down pretty much everything I think that I want to say to keep track of, sort of all the points that I want to make sure I don't forget anything. So I will be reading from something, um, a good portion of the time, but not 100 percent of the time. Um, and I just wanted to make sure I got all of my thoughts down in words ahead of time. I'm, I really like writing down my thoughts. So I did that.

Um, oh, hold on. Can I turn ads off? I think that maybe we turn ads off today. How do I make that happen for just today? Um. Shoulda had that already. I shoulda had that already. I actually don't even know how to make that happen. You know what? That's just gonna have to be that way. I'm so sorry.

Um. I'm all good. Um, yeah, okay. Today's just gonna be talking. Uh, I'm just gonna start reading from what I wrote, and go from there.

I have a really big coffee, I'm gonna take a swig. And I have my water, and I'm gonna take a swig of that.

I have always liked telling my different experiences that I've had, um, in dating because it feels important to me to share what I've learned and maybe help other people to not make the same mistakes that I have before. I'm 30. I've dated a lot. I've gone on a lot of dates. I keep trying, um, and it's unfortunate that a lot of my dating history, uh, there were a lot of bad people that tried to manipulate or control me, um, but that's not to say that every person that I've dated has treated me poorly. Um, some people just weren't the right people.

Um, and speaking out about my bad experiences has never felt as important as it does right now because silence has always brought me peace. And this time it feels like my silence is not keeping my peace. It's only keeping somebody else's peace. Um, and I never thought that I could be the kind of person to end up in a situation like I did. I'd never thought that could happen to me.

And so for me, this is important because it could help anybody else see the signs sooner than I did. Um, or hopefully avoid a similar situation entirely. Because the, the truth is it was dangerous. Um, there were a lot of things wrong in this relationship that, um, I endured some pretty terrible treatment. Um, and I might touch on some things here and there about that. But, um, if I feel like it's important to the overall context. But what I want to stay focused on is this specific issue, um, and the things that happened matter-of-factly and the things that people saw and witnessed in our circle.

Um, it took me 10 months after to heal. And I spoke with multiple therapists and tried different forms of therapy. Um, I tried somatic therapy. That one was actually really good for me. Um, because that one actually helped me release a lot of, um, built up anger I was having over the last year. Um, but the anger that I was feeling was for myself because, um, I felt like I should have known better.

I felt so stupid at myself for, um, sort of just staying through all of this. Um, and I shared my story with a lot of friends after I started talking to therapists and I was like "So, this thing happened ... and I wasn't really sure ... It just seems weird now to me looking back," and all of them told me exactly what was happening in the words that I was too afraid to use.

Um, and I was being hurt in my last relationship. And it took me all of that time to see it through that lens. Um, I even posted an anonymous story to Reddit that I have now deleted with an anonymous account. But in posting that, I found a dozen other stories that were exactly like mine, exactly the same way. Um, and all of the comments said exactly the same thing.

Um, and I was so mad at myself because I was lying to, um, at a certain point to protect this person, because I knew that if I told my friends the truth, it'd make him look really bad. Um, I didn't think that I would cry and I practiced saying all of this and I didn't cry, but it's easier to practice it when no one is listening.

Um, but he always cared more about how it looked and that was really important, not what was true. Um, and it was really subtle. When I hear about, um, when I hear about physical abuse, I think of hitting. I think of hitting and punching, um, so I thought that this wasn't violent enough, um, to be abuse. Uh, I thought that it was just like a constant accident that he kept hurting me. Um, but he's not hitting me and it didn't start as something that he did to hurt me.

Uh, he had this habit of biting, which is so weird to me now, but he said that he had had this habit since he was a kid. And even his mom said that that was true. And he said it was just affectionate and that that might have been — I mean, I think that that might have been true, maybe, at the start, but I also feel that I have good reason to believe that every part of it was a lie, but that's just my personal opinion, um, and I had no problem with just biting, that isn't even the most uncommon thing, um, but he did mention something early that I should have taken as a red flag, um, and he wanted to make sure that I was okay with him biting me because he didn't want me to come back later and say that he abused me. Which I thought was really weird considering he had never hurt me before. And so why would I call it abuse? And why was he thinking about that? And I thought he was being sweet, checking on me to make sure that I was still comfortable. Um, but of course I was because he hadn't hurt me. And why would I think he ever would?

Um, and then he did, for the first time, by accident, uh, and I don't specifically remember the actual first time that he bit me too hard by accident, because I didn't think that it would be significant, um, I thought that it would only happen once, and he started biting me more and more over a period of time, sort of throughout the whole relationship, and accidents of him biting too hard and really hurting me happened more and more frequently, um, but he always seemed genuinely sorry, and he decided that he didn't want to keep accidentally hurting me, um, so we were gonna use a safe word, um, so he could learn where my limit was, where my pain tolerance ended.

Uh, and saying that out loud now doesn't sound — Like, that's not very sound logic. Um, but at the time, I thought he cared about not hurting me. But in reality, it's like, why are you biting so hard? And why do you have to bite so hard? And it shouldn't be that hard of a problem to stop. Um, that shouldn't be that hard.

And he disguised it as this really quirky part of our relationship and was so comfortable sharing it with his friends to the point that he would do it in front of them. He thought it was this really funny story to tell and a good bit to take my arm and bite me in front of everybody until I literally shout in pain. Um, and then I have to laugh it off because I'm so embarrassed and I don't want to cause a scene in front of all of our friends and I'm sure everyone was a little bit uncomfortable, but as long as I was saying that it was fine, nobody really felt like they needed to be concerned and that's not anybody's fault because I was lying. I was lying and it wasn't fine because I would go home later and I'd tell him how uncomfortable I was. How much I didn't like being hurt all the time and I needed him to really stop biting so hard. I didn't like it and I tried telling him over and over again because he wasn't actually trying at all to not hurt me, um, but he said he would try, at first, and then he started saying things like it was my pain tolerance that was too low, or I'm exaggerating how much it actually hurts. He's not even biting that hard. I'm, I'm being dramatic. Um, but his biting escalated to a point where I was covered in bruises all over my arms and they hurt and he would poke at them for fun. And he even felt so comfortable showing off my bruises that he had caused to our friends because he would bite me so hard by accident, "by accident." He would even joke that it looked like he abused me. Um, and eventually he did acknowledge how bad it looked that I was covered in bruises all the time. So he stopped, um, biting my arms as often. And he started biting my legs instead. Um, and it was in the last couple of months of the relationship that every time he bit me, it was until I needed to use this safe word. Um, it had become his benchmark for when to stop.

Only once I was definitely hurt, um, which meant I was being hurt every single day, um, multiple times a day, uh, for all of the days that we spent together in person. And when I asked him to stop again, this time he said, "This is who he is. He isn't going to change." Those were his words. And I remember a lot of, specifically his words about certain things, especially at the end.

Um, because I'm good at remembering words and especially his wording. I became really good at remembering because he was constantly contradicting himself. And I would notice, but most of the time it wasn't worth picking a fight over. And — But he would fight me on it sometimes 'cause I would po- I would point it out and, uh, he would insist that he had never said the thing that he said, he definitely did say. And then he would say something like, "How are you so sure you're remembering correctly? Why are you always right?" Um, and he definitely said the things that I heard him say and other people heard him say.

So, he had, now at this point, weaponized the safe word and was using it to ensure that I was hurt and on a constant basis. And he wasn't sorry anymore. Um, I couldn't even tell you the last time he had apologized for doing it anymore because now sometimes he would bite me and I would yell out the safe word because it hurts so bad and he'd clamp down even harder and, just for a second, just for good measure, before letting go and sometimes I'd say the safe word and he'd grind his teeth down on my skin and sometimes he'd smile after, um, like a gloating grin?

And during this time I was filled with so much anxiety all the time that I was constantly nauseous. Gagging daily, um, on occasion throwing up because of the pit that was in my stomach. I never told him about that though. I was going and running away quietly to throw up in the toilet and rejoin our group of friends.

Um, but I felt so unwanted and ignored. Um, and I would tell him that and then he would reassure me that he wanted to be together and he loved me. He loved me more than I loved him, even. He would always insist that that was true, like the, "I love you." "I love you more," but he was like, really serious about it.

Um, and looking back, I do believe that the way I was swept off my feet at the beginning of this relationship was 100 percent love bombing. Um, and we were friends for a time. Um, at least people would have thought that, actually, but I use the word friend very loosely because, um, we had actually never spoke to each other outside of group chats we were in together when, like a handful of times throughout the, the whole time that we knew each other, um, but did not talk to each other.

So I wouldn't have even called him my friend until he found out I was single, waited a few weeks to reach out, and then we started a friendship and then that friendship turned romantic and then he made these huge romantic gestures. He wrote me the most beautiful love letter that I had ever read. Um, he called me his soulmate. He talked about "forever" one month in. He told me he hadn't been in a relationship in five years. He thought he could never find love again before he met me. He said he wanted someone to grow with. He wanted to be a dad. He had all his names picked out and I didn't have a preference because I — My feeling of it is that the timing is right and with the right person, I could, um, but if that doesn't work out in time or the time, you know, I, I'm not super pressed about it. Um, but I started opening my mind up to the idea with him because it seemed so important to him. And I kept trying to talk to him to figure out where he was, later on, when I could tell things like, were declining.

And, um, now all of a sudden he's telling me he's not sure he wants kids at all. In fact, he has never been attached to the idea of kids. Um, and I told him that isn't what he said before, and he said he's allowed to change his mind. And I'm of the opinion that in a relationship, there are a few things that you are not actually allowed to change your mind without letting your partner know.

I think that kids is one of them. It wasn't even important to me. Um, and I think marriage is one of them, so I brought that up next. And I asked if he still wanted marriage. He said he wanted to marry me. And then he said, now, "I'm not the co-" quote, "I'm not the commitment guy. You know that."

I didn't know that.

Why are you dating me?

In fact, he was telling me the exact opposite every day. Uh, he would tell me he still wanted to be together. He wanted to work on all of the problems. He wanted to, like, he wanted me at the end of everything. He did not want to break up. He made that very clear. And uh, I have though, caught him in lies before, but usually it was small stuff and I, again, I didn't want to, it wasn't anything that ever seemed worth rocking the boat over, uh, which isn't normal for me.

I hate lies. Um, and yet I ended up lying for him. So, uh, but he had lied about big things and he had also been caught lying by his friends numerous times. So this is something that he feels is acceptable to do. And everything reached a breaking point when he was about to leave for an extended period of time.

We were not going to see each other very much, a few days out of every few months, um, and now suddenly he is dumping all of these problems that he has been having feelings about all of this time later. Um, at one point he said he's been feeling this way a couple of months. At another point, he says he's been feeling this way for six months, immediately contradicting him- contradicting himself in the same conversation.

And with no time to do anything about it. I arrived — the one of — Never mind. I'm gonna get to something later, but I literally arrived for three days for this conversation to happen and then leave. Um, my cat just woke up and she's not usually awake right now — Hi, my love. It's really close to her dinner time. I should have fed her early.

Um, so no time to fix any of the problems all the sudden because there are three days before he leaves and he insisted he did not want to break up. He, and so, he was expecting me to have a solution somehow, magically, and I gave a number of solutions that would have a way forward for us to be together, but he refused to make any compromise, um, whatsoever.

And he said that "the relationship was starting to feel like a responsibility," towards the end. Also his words. Um, so it wasn't a responsibility the whole rest of the time to him. And he was at this point, basically flaunting that he would never prioritize me over anything. Um — she's eating my laundry. Please don't cause problems. — Um, and I wasn't even asking for literally even the bare minimum. I was asking for so little and he — I was watching him give exactly what I was needing in the relationship all over the place to anybody else who, who just happened to ask and just wasn't me. So, um, and he also, he was never going to prioritize me over anything that would give him more fame or money.

In fact, he said that himself. He, uh, that was exactly why he was not going to compromise at all for a solution for us to be together. Because he said he wanted to see how much fame and money he could get. Um, and I just thought we wanted to be together. I thought that's what we both wanted, because that's what he was still saying he wanted to.

Um, but then he also admitted to me that he had grown resent- uh, he had grown to resent me. And I have to be thankful that he said that bit out loud. A lot of these bits he said out loud. Because that was the last push that I needed to get myself out.

He had grown resentful, which I also pointed out that there was no reason. Like, there was no reason to feel that way and he admitted that there was no reason for him to feel that way either. I think that it was because I'm someone who can communicate how I feel. Um, but, I don't know, I think, there, I have a lot of theories and reasons why I believe things happen the way that they did and why he was lying all of the time.

Um, but, he was "resentful" of me, was causing me physical harm every day, multiple times a day, despite me telling him over and over again to stop. He wasn't going to change, and he wasn't going to end the relationship. He was going to keep hurting me, and it was possibly going to escalate even further. So I broke up with him.

And I didn't even want to. Um, because I couldn't even see for such a long time after, um, what it really was that had happened. That he had abused me. And, in fact, we left things as, we want to be friends, and he can never imagine not speaking to me again. Um, and then he never spoke to me again. Uh, outside of like a couple of exchanges where I needed to ask for my clothes to be shipped, um, so at least I got my clothes back, uh, I had a whole closet full.

However, uh, he did throw away all of my other things, uh, without saying a word to me about it. Hundreds of dollars of things from my office were trashed without a word, and I didn't block him till ten months later because I wanted an open door still. I really thought I wanted to be his friend. Um, but, uh, I don't feel that way anymore.

I do believe he was bottling up so many emotions, uh, and he would never talk about how he felt. Um, I, I think he even, I mean, he did admit that he felt like he couldn't say it any sooner. Like, there was just no possible way to say how he was feeling sooner than the absolute last possible chance. Like, not even a chance, because three days before he left, that was actually a lie too, also.

He didn't leave for another week after I left. He, he brought me in, had this three day conversation, he was supposed to leave, and then he stayed for another week before he left, uh, with all of the friends that I was also meant to see, but he had lied to me about the dates too.

Um, but I do believe that there, uh, that he was bottling up so many emotions that he was taking it out on me physically. I believe there was a moment where he knew that he didn't want to be in the relationship anymore and instead of just ending it, he tried to push me away any way he knew would hurt me. And he knew all of the ways that would hurt me the most. And he knew he was hurting me. There was no way that he didn't know because of the safe word that he made.

Uh, and he just didn't care. He was hurting me and he didn't care. And even looked like he was enjoying it, sometimes. Um, and I can look back now and I can see all these instances that were really major red flags. Um, there was this one time that he pinned me down and asked me to try my absolute hardest to get him off of me.

And I couldn't do it, obviously. And he said something to make the point that he was so much stronger than me that I wouldn't be able to fight him back. Fight back against what? What do you mean? You don't say shit like that to people? That's insane. Um, and I was also sexually assaulted by my first boyfriend, and he knew that.

Um, he had stopped giving anything to the relationship, and he said that why was because he "was just waiting for things to change on their own." Um, he said he also "didn't have the time or energy anyway to do the things that I was asking for." Um, but then would constantly make any bit of time and energy for anybody and anything but me.

Uh, and he would say he wanted more quality time, so then I would try to arrange things for us to do online because we were, uh, long distance, but then he would complain that he doesn't want to spend all of his time on the computer anymore. Uh, and then we'd be there in person and all he wants to do is stay inside, play games on his computer, watch movies. He doesn't want to go out.

Um, and I'm not saying any of this next part to be mean, um, he lived in filth like I have never seen, and I've seen filth. This was the worst. Uh, he would spill things on the floor and never, literally never clean them up. Uh, he got an ant infestation once, um, and wasn't going to do anything about it because he said, he said "Bugs are normal in British houses," um, so I had to buy Antkiller. And he wouldn't clean his bathroom for months, and months, and months, but would constantly complain about how bad it smelled, and I would tell him, that's mould. It's mould. He complained about being tired all the time too, which I don't know if that was a lie or not, but mould will do that too.

But he would insist that it wasn't, somehow, without having cleaned in months. But it's not mould. Um, when I met him, he was washing his clothes without detergent. Um, just, he wasn't using that at all, and I don't know for how long before I met him. He was just running it with water and then hanging it on his filthy kitchen cabinets.

Um, and I felt bad. I felt bad because I felt like he needed someone to help him learn how to be cleaner. I thought he just didn't know how and I listened to all of the struggles of his upbringing and I was like, "He just doesn't know how. Someone just needs to show him." Um, and then I found out that he said he doesn't clean at all when I'm not there because he just waits for me to get there to do it.

Um, and I only found out about that after we broke up because he said it behind my back. Uh, I was doing all of the cleaning and laundry for him. Also, I had a separate bathroom. I want to make that clear. I wasn't using that bathroom. I had a separate bathroom that I cleaned for myself. I had cleaning supplies. I don't think he even actually knew I had cleaning supplies in there. Um, but I had my own bathroom.

Um, all the, all the cleaning, all the laundry. All of it. I was paying for. All of the, um, like paper towels, like soap, all of that only stayed in the house so long as I was buying it. Um, I would arrive and there would just not be toilet paper in the whole house. There were paper towels instead. And who knows for how long, too.

Um, I was paying for food more than half the time. Uh, because he would often push me into ordering food for us even if I had paid for the last meal, or the meal before that. Um, and I'm of the opinion now that I shouldn't have been paying for any food. Um, none at all, but I wanted to at least, I thought I was being equal by at least doing like a back and forth. Um, but, uh, I ended up paying for food more often than just going back and forth anyway. And he would do this to his friends all the time too. Um, but I was also paying for every plane ticket and the cat sitter, which cost roughly the amount of a plane ticket to England.

Um, and he never offered to help me pay after the couple of times he did come here to visit me because he paid for the flights that we would both take. Um, but that only happened twice at the very beginning. I have actually had a friend tell me that, that this is financial abuse, but I don't know enough about that to say for myself, but I was telling him that I couldn't afford it, uh, all by myself all the time because I was losing money. I was never able to work properly there and he wasn't traveling at all to see me anymore, even though he said he would. Uh, that was like the basis of our entire relationship starting off. Um, so then he agreed to pay for the cat sitter so that it would be basically paying half the cost of my travels. Um, and he did that once, and then never did it again, uh, despite many more months of dating.

Uh, and I was traveling often. Um, I had to. Because he was worried that we weren't spending enough quality time together. And then all of the time that he would have ever extra, he would choose, choose, to not spend it on me because there was an available choice and he chose not to spend it with me. Often.

Um, and I did everything short of just up and move there, which I was willing to do the whole time. And I told him that I was willing to do it and he knew, uh, but he insisted that I don't. He insisted not to. He was planning to move here. That was supposed to happen first.

Um, and then at the end of the relationship, he said, "Maybe things would have been different if I lived there." If I lived there. Uh, like I had said I would the whole time and he insisted I don't. Maybe that could have saved the relationship. Um, and I say all of this because I believe that people like this are genuinely dangerous. I believe he is dangerous.

Um, he was willing to lie. He was willing to do harm to someone he claimed to love more than anyone he has ever loved. Uh, his actions escalated, um, and I don't think that I'll be the last person that he hurts. Uh, and I felt like sharing my story was really important to warn people. Um, I want people to see the signs that I refused to.

I want you to listen to your body. Um, and get out as soon as possible. Tell your friends the truth and let them help you.

Um, I really thought I, I couldn't — Because I had been sexually assaulted in a previous relationship, I just thought I was so much smarter. To never — and I was like, "if someone ever laid their hands on me, I'd leave immediately. It would never happen a second time." But you, you just, it just kind of happened so slowly over time, and got worse, and worse, and worse, until the point where there's no way to deny the fact that he was hurting me and he knew, and, and didn't care.

That's just the kind of thing that I keep repeating to myself when I'm like, "But was it bad enough? What? It wasn't violent enough." Um, but I was being hurt multiple times every single day. Days, and days, and days, and days, for a month at a time in a row, uh, and I'm not even speaking on most, because I did touch on other things, but I am not even speaking on most of the other things that, in my opinion, I do think that there are some things that are across a line that make you a bad person.

I don't think that most people can be defined in a black and white, you're good or you're bad, but I do believe that there is a line that you can cross and only bad people will do the things on the other side of that line. You know what I mean? Um, and I watched a couple of things cross that line. And I just, I, I truly feel now that my soul is so healed.

Um, I am light years beyond him. Uh, this was the last thing that I felt like I needed to do — That's my cat. — Um, before I could move forward and hopefully never talk about him ever again. Outside of maybe my stories that I want to tell about other shitty things he did. Anonymously mixed in with the other stories I still have of shitty things that shitty exes did.

Because I think it's important for us to share our stories and our experiences. I think it's important for all of us to know that we deserve so much better than this. Um, and I think that if people don't want us to talk about the shitty things that they do, then they shouldn't do shitty things. Um, and this just felt so important to share.

I always wanted to share my experiences. I always will. Um, and that's kind of it. That's it. That's the end of everything I prepared. I reserve the right, uh, entirely to change my mind later and tell every story I want to, um, but for now that's all I really have, I feel like, from my soul, I want to speak on. Because I think that this can help other people.

I think that it can help other victims. Um, I have already talked to a number of — I only cry now when I'm talking about my friends! Who also dealt with such shitty things from shitty people. Um, but I'm also so, so grateful for all of my friends who were through, uh, with me through this whole thing. And my friends who also were experiencing similar, similar sorts of situations, um, at the same time, and we kind of went through it together. So, um, I think they are the strongest people in the whole world, and they made me feel like the strongest people in the whole world today. Did I call myself people? I meant person. I feel like the strongest people — I did it again. — I feel like the strongest person. They made me feel so brave. I felt impenetrable today. Um, but I am gonna go now because my friends are coming over and we're immediately gonna go become distracted by watching Love Is Blind. I already watched all of it already and I don't care.

So thank you, um, for listening. Thank you everyone who gifted subs. Um, um, I am going to be taking, uh, the rest of the week off from streaming. I have a video going out on Saturday and I'll be back next week and, uh, you won't hear about any of this again for a while, probably. But, uh, thank you all. I don't really even know what to do now. I think I'm just going to end. Um, go spread love all over the place on Twitch right now and I'll see you guys later. Bye.

Wilbur's response:

In the past week a series of allegations have been made over my conduct from an ex-girlfriend. I want to emphasise that, although I feel it fair to offer my perspective, this person's feelings are completely valid. I have taken my time sharing this statement as I wanted to process and respond respectfully and with the hope to gain a deeper understanding for the situation.

During our relationship's final months, I regrettably became slobbish, disrespectful, and selfish. These actions caused a lot of pain to my ex-girlfriend and I've since sought therapy to address these behaviours, making significant lifestyle changes to rectify my past actions. I have come to realise how much my past behaviour hurt this person, but I truly, compassionately believe I have made great strides from the person I once was and hope I can continue to grow and improve on this trajectory.

The allegation of abuse, particularly in the form of biting, deeply shocked me. Throughout our relationship, I understood from our numerous conversations and text message exchanges on the subject, that this behaviour was consensual, playful and reciprocally enjoyed. I truly believe those personal message exchanges reflect mutual affection and understanding. Out of respect for her, I choose not to publish them and I emphasise my perspective is not shared to diminish or invalidate anyone's feelings. Instead I share it in the hope that I can offer a genuine, fair and relevant insight into my understanding of the situation. While I may perceive our interactions differently, I recognise that this person has processed and expressed feelings of hurt. I want to extend my sincerest apologies for any pain that I caused.

I am fully committed to understanding and addressing her concerns going forward. I hope my perspective sheds light on this situation without detracting from its message. I am dedicated to earning and maintaining the trust of those around me and hope I continue to be held to these high standards I wish to attain and maintain.

- Will

Shubble's response:

i could not have imagined what i would wake up to today. my ex pretending he thought i enjoyed being hurt... and all of my friends immediately coming to my defense. The support has brought me to tears, i don't even know what to say. i'll be back, i'll just be taking a little time

and for the record, i don't accept the apology

#shelby #shelby shubble #wilbur situation #Youtube

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ivaalo · 14 days ago

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Introduction

This is a fan analysis about the results of 24 polls posted on Tumblr by the user @zeldatourney. Huge thanks to them to have organized this tourney.

(Keep in mind my first language isn't English, so I might make some minor mistakes)

This is a long post with multiple graphs, so I'm putting a "Read more" button here!

For each game, the question asked was "How high does [game] rank?" with 7 answers possible to choose:

S tier (One of the greatest)

A tier (A favorite)

B tier (I like it)

C tier (Meh)

D tier (I'd rather play something else)

F tier (AWFUL)

I haven't played this game

The poll started on the 2nd of December 2024 and ended the 9th of December 2024.

Disclaimer: This is not a representation of the Zelda community as a whole, but a result of people who saw and voted for the polls between those previously quoted dates.

For the rest of this post, I will simplify each game's name by its abbreviations. For example, "A Link To The Past" will be named "ALTTP". The polls didn't specify if it contains the original games or both the original games and the remakes. They will be named as such:

[TLOZ] The Legend of Zelda

[AOL] Adventure of Link

[ALTTP] A Link to the Past

[LA] Link's Awakening (DX) (+ the unnamed 2019 remake)

[OOT] Ocarina of Time (3D)

[MM] Majora's Mask (3D)

[OOS] Oracle of Seasons

[OOA] Oracle of Ages

[FS] Four Swords (Anniversary Edition)

[TWW] The Wind Waker (HD)

[FSA] Four Swords Adventures

[TMC] The Minish Cap

[TP] Twilight Princess (HD)

[PH] Phantom Hourglass

[ST] Spirit Tracks

[SS] Skyward Sword (HD)

[ALBW] A Link Between Worlds

[HW] Hyrule Warriors (Legend / Definitive Edition)

[TFH] Tri Force Heroes

[BOTW] Breath of the Wild

[COH] Cadence of Hyrule

[AOC] Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity

[TOTK] Tears of the Kingdom

[EOW] Echoes of Wisdom

Collected data

Each poll being independent from each other, the number of votes varies from one poll to another.

For each games, I added the percentage (as picked up from the HTML for a better precision). The result is either 99.999, 100 or 100.001, so I sometimes cheated to add or remove 0.001 somewhere. Tumblr doesn't give you access to the exact numbers of vote per option.

So before ranking the games, I have to show you first what games are the most played. Adding all answers and doing:

Played (%) = 100 - "I haven't played this game" (%)

I'll use colours to differentiate 2D games (in terms of gameplay) to 3D games. I'll also highlight spin-off games and multiplayer games.

Here are the games played by more than 75% of players:

We can already see a huge pattern. All the 3D games are there. And the only 2D Zelda game to be played by 75% of players is ALBW. BOTW and OOT are the most played games of the sample, as those were huge turning points and both cultural and commercial success.

We can also notice the difference of 5% between the least played 3D game (MM) and the most played 2D game (ALBW).

Let's continue to look at the other played games:

EOW is most likely low as it's the most recent game, at this time, but also because it's not a 3D game. And the hype train was low compared to TOTK. (3 months of anticipation compared to 4 years)

And finally, the multiplayer games are the least played games, excluding COH. Also worth noting that all the spin-off games cited can also be played with another player, but it wasn't the main focus of the communication. COH being a musical tactical rogue-lite only appealed to a specific part of Zelda fans.

If these polls contained the CD-i Zelda games, Link's Crossbow Training and Tingle games, the score would probably be under COH, but we never know!

I'll keep these colours as labels, to recognize them better in the next images.

Alright. Time to share the ranking. Here is the global result, sorted by release date in North America:

It's kind of a lot to see! Overall, the games are pretty liked. So first, let's take a look at the disliked games:

Please note that the X-axis was zoomed, so we can see the result better.

We can already notice that AOL makes a huge contrast. As this game is considered as the black sheep of the franchise because of how different it is, its reputation mostly came from the difficulty of that game.

Almost a factor of 0.5 divides the first disliked game to the second. TFH the second disliked and the original TLOZ follows.

ALBW is the least disliked, with under 1%, counting D tier and F tier.

But notice the F-tier (red) line. It varies a lot, so let's take a look at the most hated games:

Yep, TOTK is third, this time. As I don't personally think it's awful, it definitively disappointed many by being too close to BOTW and having a lot of issues BOTW didn't have.

Nobody voted "F tier" for ALTTP nor OOT. Same for OOS but keep in mind this game was the least voted one too!

Alright, enough for the hate! Let's look at the most appreciated Zelda games.

Yep, the majority of Zelda fans like 22.5 out of 24 of the games! (TFH being exactly 50, I half-counted it!)

TWW is being almost unanimously appreciated, with almost 97%, and the second one to get this score is TMC, a 2D game, with more than 96%!

You can notice some gaps, like between ST and COH, and then between the Oracle games and TOTK.

Now let's look at the most loved games:

5 3D games are in the top 5, except for SS and TOTK. TMC is very close to beat BOTW and remains the most loved 2D Zelda game. Notice how SS and TOTK make a huge gap between the game before and the game after, like voters use them as references. The two Hyrule Warriors games are, in a funny way, between the Oracle ones.

Let's add a step forward and look at the S tier only:

Nothing changes for the top 9 games. However, EOW seems more nuanced and is less considered as best than TOTK.

Final results

And finally, let's rank them using the Majority Judgment:

The Majority Judgment was created to propose a more democratic way to vote. Each candidate has multiple mentions, and you (the elector) must attribute one mention to each candidate. Since this poll uses this exact method of vote, I decided to rank them all using the Majority Judgment. To count using the Majority Judgment, you must focus on the 50% axis, and look at the category that crosses it (more than 50%). That gives you the tier, and the best tier wins.

When two or more candidates get the same tier, there are multiple ways to rank:

The first way is to put a line at the middle and see which line has the higher percentage. (Less precise but more simple)

The second way is to divide it into multiple tiers by doing the first method again and again until each candidates has a unique tier. (More precise but less simple)

But since I didn't want to compare B++++ to B+++-, I used the first method. It's my democracy and I do whatever I want!

Just keep in mind that depending on the way to count these games may be swapped:

ALTTP and LA

OOA and PH

AOC and HW

SO, for the data. Top 5 is TWW, MM, TP, OOT and BOTW. To be honest, I imagined MM to be a more nuanced game, or at least more controversial, since it has a unique concept.

The A tier only contains 2D games, except SS. TMC, ST and ALBW are the favourite 2D games. ALTTP and LA are always very close. The last one of the tier is EOW.

Only mainline games are in the S and A tier.

The first game of the B tier is a spin-off game, followed by TOTK.

TFH was one vote away from being in the B tier. And no surprise, AOL is the last one.

To sum up, according to the participants who voted for these polls:

S tier

🥇 The Wind Waker

🥈 Majora's Mask

🥉 Twilight Princess

⭐ Ocarina of Time

⭐ Breath of the Wild

A+ tier

The Minish Cap

Spirit Tracks

A- tier

A Link Between Worlds

Skyward Sword

A Link to the Past

Link's Awakening

Echoes of Wisdom

B+ tier

Cadence of Hyrule

Tears of the Kingdom

Oracle of Seasons

Oracle of Ages

Phantom Hourglass

B- tier

Age of Calamity

Hyrule Warriors

Four Swords Adventures

Four Swords

The Legend of Zelda

C+ tier

Tri Force Heroes

C- tier

Adventure of Link

Thank you for reading! ~

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hermitadaymay · 10 months ago

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-Removed double name tagging. This year, all submissions for each day's Hermit will only be tagged with the shorter version of their name (where applicable). For example, fanworks for Stress will be tagged "#stress," not "#stressmonster101, #stress." Notably, fanworks featuring Joel SmallishBeans will be tagged #joel.

=Updated desktop blog theme. (please look at it I did actual coding for this)

=Changed Bonus Days to Sundays.

=Time of rollover between dates will now be 12:00am US Central time (6:00am GMT).

+Added credits page.

+Added people to credit! HADM24 comes to you with the help of boatloads of my friends both online and irl and even some names you might know (keep reading).

+THE BIG ONE: Added a secondary goal for the Hermit-a-Day May event: a complete fundraiser for Gamers Outreach.

The way this community comes together to celebrate the Hermits and each other is incredible. There are something like 1,800 fanworks on this blog from last May and early June! And that's not counting what was posted on other social media platforms as the prompt calendar spread.

I wanted to do something with that momentum - something with a little more substance behind it than last year's spontaneous "hey we should all donate $14!" So I've partnered with two amazing fandom artists you may remember from their daily posts last year - @belmarzi and @rendiggitydog - so that as a community, we could make even more awesomeness come from this event.

I have created a Tiltify campaign so that donations can be made directly to GO - I will never touch the money - and tracked for our incentives:

GRAND TOTAL INCENTIVE: For every $150 we raise for Gamers Outreach (to a minimum of $300, and a maximum that is yet to be determined, but we currently have support for up to $2,100), belmarzi will make 10 seconds' worth of animatic, featuring as many Hermits as she can fit into the time frame. You can expect to see the animatic published in early July.

INDIVIDUAL DONATION INCENTIVE: For every $65 you personally donate to the fundraiser, Rae rendiggitydog will draw you a shaded flats commission of a Hermit of your choice. These will be finished in the order in which the donations are received, and may be sent to you in May or early June.

I've put a lot of work into making this happen, and I cannot tell you how excited I am for May to arrive! The campaign will be opened in mid to late April together with the posting of this year's prompt calendar.

We've got some great stuff cooking up for y'all this year, between the whole month of fanart and the fundraising incentives! Thank you all for being a part of it! The askbox is open for questions, if you have them.

Next time: the official release of the prompt calendar!

-Mod Luna

#hermitcraft #hermitaday #reference post

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covid-safer-hotties · 3 months ago

Text

Also preserved in our archive (Daily updates!)

Video below the main text!

One of the simplest things you can do to protect your health is to keep track of indoor air quality. Viruses spread through the air and accumulate in spaces that are poorly ventilated. By opening a window or running on an air purifier you can reduce your risks of catching an airborne virus. While viruses spread most during the winter, some viral illnesses like COVID are present all year round, and can cause serious short and long-term health issues. This post explains how monitoring and improving indoor air quality can help protect your health through all the seasons.

Viruses can spread through the air at long distances Viruses spread through droplets and smaller particles called aerosols that are expelled by someone who has an infection. This can happen in a number of ways including coughing, sneezing, talking, or simply breathing. The highest risk of catching a virus is when you are close to the source, where there is a greater concentration of droplets and aerosols.

Viruses can also infect people from larger distances because viruses trapped in aerosols can linger in the air for hours, like cigarette smoke. When a room is poorly ventilated, aerosols accumulate, increasing your risk of catching the virus and getting sick, even if you are not standing close to someone who is infected.

Illustration of how droplets and aerosols released during talking can transmit viruses if the person is infected. (Source: J Hosp Infect)

COVID spreads throughout the year Many respiratory virus illnesses like the flu spread predominantly during winter, because they can survive longer in cold and dry conditions, and because people are more likely to gather inside in poorly ventilated rooms during the colder months.

However, COVID can surge throughout the year. COVID peaks occur regularly because the coronavirus that causes COVID is extremely contagious; new variants can emerge quickly; and immunity from previous infections and vaccinations decreases over time. COVID usually surges in winter and summer, however the virus can circulate at high levels at any point during the year.

COVID still causes serious illness While things are different than in 2020 when COVID first appeared, COVID hasn’t gone away. In many countries, COVID is still the most deadly infectious disease. And COVID infections continue to cause long-term health issues for many people.

Anyone who gets COVID can develop Long COVID. Although people with severe initial infections are most likely to develop Long COVID, you can get Long COVID even after a mild initial infection.

Because coronaviruses mutate quickly, you can be reinfected with another variant as early as several weeks after you have gotten COVID. Reinfections can occur multiple times, and the more reinfections you have increases your risk of developing long-term health issues.

People with Long COVID can experience a wide variety of symptoms that can last weeks, months, or years after the initial infection. COVID can increase the risk of developing new conditions or worsen pre-existing ones including heart disease, diabetes, blood clots, neurological conditions, and chronic fatigue.

Even being sick with COVID in the short term is disruptive because most people are infectious with COVID for at least 10 days. That can mean missing days of work, family time, or an important social event.

Simple things you can do to avoid COVID The best way of reducing your risk of developing long-term health issues from COVID is by taking a few simple steps to prevent getting COVID in the first place.

Staying up to date with the latest COVID vaccine reduces your risk of serious illness, infection, and Long COVID. Wearing a mask helps boost your own protection, protects others around you, and works against any COVID variant or other type of airborne virus.

Another effective way to reduce your risk of getting sick from airborne viruses is to improve indoor air quality.

Tracking air quality can help reduce your risk of sickness You can track air quality with a carbon dioxide monitor. When we breathe, we expel carbon dioxide molecules, which accumulate in rooms that are poorly ventilated. A high carbon dioxide reading means that you are likely breathing in a large percentage of recirculated air. If that air contains viruses, that puts you at greater risk of getting sick.

With this knowledge you can take steps to reduce your risk. This can be as easy as opening a window to allow particles with viruses to escape and fresh air to come in. If opening a window isn’t possible, HEPA purifiers or Far-UVC Light systems can help remove particles with viruses from the air.

To learn more about how carbon dioxide monitors can help reduce your risk of getting sick from viral illnesses, watch this video.

youtube

The Aranet team thanks Dr. Lucky Tran for offering insights and guidance on how to reduce the risk of COVID infection. May these revelations empower everyone to make mindful choices and foster well-ventilated environments, enriching not only our homes and shared spaces but also our overall well-being and health. Lucky Tran

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tojis-favorite · 2 years ago

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TOJI AS YOUR R&B SINGER! BOYFRIEND

(i love giving toji random occupations)

HEADCANONS UNDER CUT

Okay first let's talk about the type of music he would make first. I feel like he would make music like a mixture of bryson tiller and partynextdoor (LISTEN).

The music he would make would be talking about your relationship and most of it would be sexual but not overbearing. It would just be the perfect amount (i’m going to link some songs at the end <3) .

He’s a rising artist, he started out by posting songs on youtube and they would get a decent amount of attention. When he released his mixtape someone had posted a snippet from one of his songs on twitter and he started BOOMING. He has about 3 millions followers on instagram and the more music he puts out the more fame he gains. Which he can find overbearing sometimes.

So far he has done features with Lil Baby, Lakeyah, and Gojo (🤭). He tries not to do too many features at one time because he doesn’t want to be overpowered by the artist he works with; he wants to be known for his voice, not for the people he works with.

ON TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP!

You have been with him since the BEGINNING. You guys had started dating when you were in highschool. You were a freshman and Toji was a Sophomore. You were friends with a popular group but you weren’t necessarily popular yourself. Toji saw how we were not in the mix a whole lot and he liked that about you.

Anytime you would sleep over at Toji’s house he would sing you to sleep without even realizing it until you would wake up the next morning and would tell him. With the start of your relationship the love that he had for you was beautiful and he would find himself writing about it (all of it).

For your birthday he had sung you one of the songs and that's when you told him that he needed to start taking music more seriously because you could see the talent in him. So he did. Now you're in your Sophmore year of College and he decided not to go to college due to him being on his rise to fame (best believe he is paying your tuition, dorming, and books).

Everyone knows you're in a relationship. Toji did not try to hide your relationship from anyone, especially when he started to get more recognition. He loves to just randomly post you on his story and he has a tattoo of your name on the side of his neck in cursive so people know you are serious.

NSFW (these are all different occasions)

First things first STUDIO SEX (omg). Toji goes to the studio at night most of the time and that’s usually when your day comes to an end. Once he sees that you made it back to your shared apartment he sends you an uber to the studio.

“Thank you,. have a good night sir!” You said as you stepped out of the uber and made your way to studio 15 which Toji informed you of earlier. “Baby i’m here” you said in a sing-song voice as you opened the door to the studio. He was all alone. The lights in the room were red as your boyfriend sat in a chair playing around with the track that was currently playing.

Turning around in the chair a smile spread across his face before he pulled you into a hug. “Hey pretty, how was your day?” looking at him you struge “It was okay, I just went to class and went out with Mina after and then I went home and now here I am.”

Grabbing your face, Toji presses a kiss to your lips as you grasp onto your shoulders. Just by kissing him you could tell that he was frustrated as his tongue explored your mouth while his hands traveled to your ass. Pulling away he keeps his hold on you as he kisses your neck. “I really need my muse right now, can you help me baby?” Your boyfriend asked as he started to pull off the pants you hand on along with your panties.

Wrapping his hands around your thighs takes you into the next room with the microphone. Walking over to the microphone he pulls down his grey sweatpants and lines his cock with your entrance make sure to support the bottom of your ass you bounced on his cock your arms wrapped around his shoulders holding on to him.

“Fuck Toj-mhm your so deep.” You moaned as he started kissing your lips. “Your so fucking pretty y/n, cum on your cock.” Squeezing your eyes shut you feel your orgasm approaching as Toji starts to move faster as you curl your toes. You try to bite on his shoulder to shield the sound until you feel a sharp sting on your ass.

“I want to hear you cum on my cock little muse, fuck-ing give it to me.” He said in a groan as he started to cum. “Oh my gosh im cuming” you announced as you started to shake on top of him as you felt his cum shot inside you. “Thank you so much my little muse” your boyfriend said as his kissed all over your face lovenly.

It was a Saturday night and you were currently with your boyfriend at a club he was hosting for. “Do you want anything else to drink?” You felt a hand on your waist that was your boyfriends. Nodding your head you answer “Can you get me like two shots of Hennessy?”, “Okay i’ll be right back pretty.” he said walking off to the nearest bar.

Shortly after we came back with two shot glasses and watched as you took them back to back. Bending down you feel his lips next to your ear. “You okay baby.” Toji asks you as he fixes some hairs that were in front of your face. “Yeah we don’t have nights like this often so i’m making the most out of it.” You explained looking around at all the lights in the club already feeling the effects of the alcohol.

Suddenly Bring it back by Travis Porter started to play throughout the club which caused you to squeal. With Toji standing behind you, bend over and you start to twerk on him to the rhythm of the song. You could have a bunch of flashes on you as you could hear your friends encouraging you as you feel Toji get hard as he rubbed on your ass through your dress making sure it didn’t go up too high.

You get back up once the chorus is done playing and look up at Toji as he pulls your dress down for you. “Let’s go to the car real quick” He said as he started to guide you out of the section. “Where the hell are you guys going?” one of Toji's friends interaigate you, “Well, be right back Gojo.” He stated rolling his eyes and continued to guide you to the back door.

When you guys make it outside Toji opens the door to the back seat of his car, having you go in first. “Lay down on your back for me, pretty.” Doing what he said you lay down on your back as he closed the door behind him. “You are so incredible, you know that? You can do the simplest shit and you still manage to turn me on more and more, open your legs.” He said his voice was demanding.

Open your legs you gasped as Toji wasted no time leaning over pulling your panties to the side and attaching his lips onto your clit letting out a groan as he did sending electric shocks throughout your whole body. “Oh my gosh Toji you're making me feel so good.” You said as you held on to his hair for support your eye rolled back into your head as your heels pressed into Toji’s back.

Moving your hips against his face he puts two fingers inside of you as he licks on your clit being able to see that you're about to cum. He gently bites down on your clit before groaning to your pussy which sends you into overdrive as you start to cum all over his face as he slurps up all the cream that tries to escape you with a smile.

Breathing through your nose you stare up at your boyfriend from on your knees while you take his cock in your mouth. He had been nervous for the performance at an award show and you had taken him backstage to calm his nerves.

“Your way to good for me my little muse fuck keep doing it like that pretty girl.” He guides you as he puts his hands in your hair, guiding at a slow pace making sure you aren't choking around him. Looking into his eyes you could definitely tell he was more relaxed which made you happy.

Circling your tongue on his tips you see him squeeze his eyes shut before he starts moving his hips toward your face. Opening your mouth wide you grab his cock tapping it on your tongue a few times before taking all of him in your mouth saliva almost covering your whole face.

“I’m cumming pretty, you think you can swallow my cum for me hmm?” Toji let out a few short breaths before he let out a deep groan as he came in your mouth, his hips riding out his orgasm. Swallowing his cum you stand up with the help of Toji and give him a hard kiss to his lips. “You've got this, you've done this before and you're going to do it a million other times.”

“Why are you acting like this pretty girl?” “Because it was disrespectful and you can be to fucking friendly sometimes. You angrily explained to your boyfriend over facetime. Your best friend had just sent you a video of Toji from a meet and greet with a fan.

In the video he kissed the girl's cheek which was completely fine, that's not what you had a problem with. You had a problem with the fact that towards the end of the video the fan turned her head and almost kissed your boyfriend and instead of addressing the problem Toji just laughed it off with the fan.

You guys had talked about him establishing boundaries with his fans and he wholeheartedly agreed. “What did you want me to do? ,Cuss her out?” Sighing, you shake your head understanding what he was saying. “I am going to post something on twitter though just so it doesn't happen again sweetheart.” he said to reassure you as he shifted his camera showing how he was lying in bed.

“Do look even more pretty when you're mad at me,” Toji said with a smile he white teeth biting the bottom of his lips. “What are you wearing?” He asked, smirking as you took the blanket of your body exposing the silk dress you were wearing.

“Fuck your so beautiful.” Your boyfriend let out a breath as you saw him pull his cock out of his boxers. You hide your face smiling when you see the pre-cum escaping out of his tip. “Talk to me pretty.” he said as you could hear he fist go up and down on his shaft.

Look at the camera you set your phone up on one of your pillows as you slowly start to pull the strings off of your shoulder causing your boobs to be exposed, your nipples hard due to them being uncovered.” “Ahh shit show me, show me that pretty pussyb of yours please.” Bending over with your ass toward the camera you open your lips moaning as the cold hits your clit.

Toji damn near came when he saw you put your fingers inside of you fisting the sheets and you moved your fingers faster. “Turn around so I can see your face.” you turn around as you meet with the sight of Toji's chest going up and down as his breathing got harder to viens in his neck and arms bulging.

“I’m cumming pretty- mhh I wish I was there so I could cum on your pretty- fuck face.” groaned as spurts of cum came out onto the camera his phone covered in cum as he saw you cum on your own fingers.`` You need to come back home Toji. I miss you.” You while chasing your orgasm as you saw him wiping camera off with a smile on his face.

“I’ll be home soon pretty.” he informed you with a lazy smile on his face as he watched you slip your straps back onto your shoulders. “I love you Toji” you geeked as you saw the look on his face “I love you more princess.”

BONUS SCENE <3

“TOJI!” you scream as you enter your shared bedroom with him seeing him laying in your bed on his phone. “What’s up pretty girl?” he asked as if he didn't do anything wrong. “Why would you put my moans in the back of your new song that’s so embarrassing” you said crossing your arms over your chest. Standing up from the bed Toji wraps you in a hug laughing.

“No it's not, I think it adds a pretty nice touch to the song and people seem to agree with me seeing as it has 1 million views already.” he said with a cheeky smile on his face. Rolling your eyes you unwrap yourself from him just for him to pull you back into his arm again. “Are you really upset y/n because I could just release another version of the song? He asked, looking into your eyes.

“It’s fine Toji next time let me hear it before you release so I can try to moan better.” You stood on your tiptoes moving your lips toward his meeting you halfway he pressed a kiss to your lips before pulling away. “Your moans are fucking perfect pretty.” He said before throwing you over his shoulders.

“TOJI PUT ME DOWN!”

TOJIS MUSIC

Her way- Party Next Door

Overtime- Bryson Tiller

Break from Toronto- Party Next Door

Let Em’ Know- Bryson Tiller

B.E.D- Jacques

From the City- Party Next Door

Exchange- Bryson Tiller

Or Nah- The weekend, Ty dolla sign, and Wiz Khalifa (he would sing the weekends part 😩)

Drama- Roy Woods ft. Drake

Self Esteem- Lambo4oe ft NLE CHOPPA

A/N should I do Gojo? 😭😩🤭

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froggibus · 1 year ago

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Mary On A Cross - Mammon

Pairing: Mammon x f! angel! reader (reader uses female pronouns + has a pussy)

Genre: smut/NSFW

Word Count: 3k

Summary: dating an angel has never been easy for Mammon, but now he wants to show you that your holiness isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be

CW: blasphemy, desecration of a temple, sex in a temple, anti-religious sentiments, sacrilege, fingering, stripping, slight exhibitionism, public sex, overstimulation, unprotected sex (be smart 07), multiple creampies, praise/degradation, sex on the floor

hello yes it is I still managing to write this month…anyway, please enjoy the culmination of months of thoughts of mammon + listening to ghost :)

Kinktober Masterlist

“C’mon, can’t you tell me where we’re going?” You pout.

Mammon tightens his grip on your hand, continuing to lead you down the cobbled path. You’re not supposed to be in the human world, and you’ve always been a rule follower, but Mammon just brings out that rebellious side of you.

The demon doesn’t answer your question. In fact, he’s been strangely quiet ever since he came up to you after school and started dragging you along with him. You know he doesn’t always have the easiest time at RAD, but you’ve never quite seen him this upset.

Mammon tries to keep his composure and remind himself that it’s not you he’s mad at. But it’s so hard to forget the differences between you when you look so fucking angelic all the time. No matter what you do, your skin has that ethereal glow to it and your voice always sounds melodic and soft. It makes him want to worship you, it makes him want to ruin you.

Jealousy and anger courses through him, his heart beating so hard it’s painful. He hates how people in the Devildom look at him when you’re together, hates the stares you always get. No one looks at you like that when you’re with Simeon, or even the damn chihuahua. No, those looks are reserved for Mammon, and he reads them loud and clear.

A demon and an angel? Ridiculous. They’ll never last. He’s going to ruin her. How did they even end up together? Aren’t they mortal enemies? Disgusting.

He glances at you and immediately the thoughts die out. You’ve always been able to quiet the darker parts of his mind, dull his jagged edges. He almost feels guilt for what he’s going to do to you.

Almost.

You stop as soon as you reach the stairs to the temple. “No. Mammon, no.”

You plant your heels into the ground and tug on his hand, trying to get him to release you. You would do almost anything for him, but this? This is too far.

He stops on the stair above you, looking at you seriously. “Are you comin?”

His voice is void of anything. No guilt, no shame. Just that same, tired tone he uses whenever his brother’s are picking on him too much.

“Do you know what this is? This is a temple, Mammon. For an archangel. Gods, you could be smited just for being within five feet of this place!”

“The Great Mammon? Smited?” He scoffs, dropping your hand and continuing up to the door.

His hand touches the handle and you brace yourself, ready for your boyfriend to get eviscerated before your eyes. He twists the handle, the door clicks open and…nothing happens. You tilt your head in confusion.

“Are you comin’ or what?”

You scurry up the stairs after him, managing to slip through the door just before it closes. The temple is completely empty, three rows of oak benches lining a long marble aisle. At the end of the aisle is a large, empty throne carved out of marble.

You recognize the carving at the top of the throne immediately and stop dead in your tracks. You really shouldn’t be here. You watch silently as Mammon approaches the throne, plopping himself in it and giving you a crooked smirk.

He beckons you closer with his fingers, and you find yourself stumbling down the aisle without thinking. His eyes are dark, the pupil consuming the iris. You don’t like that look, and yet you can’t stop.

He pats his knee, “hav’a seat.”

You hesitantly sit down on his lap, leaning your head back on his chest. Your heart is racing, and you expect someone to burst in at any moment and smite you down.

“Your heart is pounding,” Mammon whispers, hot breath against your neck.

You shiver and nod. You really shouldn’t be doing this. You go to stand up but Mammon yanks you back down, using his thighs to force your legs apart. He rests a hand on your inner thigh just above your knee, gently tapping his fingers along your skin.

“M-mammon,” you hiss, “we can’t be doing this in here.” You try to keep your voice low, afraid you’ll somehow draw attention to the two of you.

Mammon trails his hand up your thigh, stopping when the side of his knuckle just barely brushes your clit. You gasp, your hips grinding into his hand as if they have a mind of their own.

He laughs. “We shouldn’t be doin this anywhere, baby.”

He presses a finger into your clit, applying just enough pressure to have your panties dampening without giving you quite what you want. You try to close your legs around his hand, whether to get more or get him to stop, you’re not sure.

“M-mammon please!” The words tumble out of your mouth before you can stop them. You force yourself to sit up straight, clearing your throat, “let’s just go home. Please, I could lose my blessing for this.”

Mammon grips your chin, forcing you to face him. “Won’t ya do it? For me?”

It’s the most sincere thing he’s said to you all day. His features soften as he looks at you, vulnerability on full display. The way he’s looking at you so softly, it’s like he’s asking you to give up your blessing, to come live a lifetime with him.

You’re not an idiot, you know what people think about the two of you. You know being with him is wrong, and that it can’t possibly last forever—not if he’s still a demon, and you’re still an angel.

“I-I’ll do it.”

He grins, pulling you back into him and kissing your neck. You can feel his canines graze the sensitive skin, burning beneath his touch. He keeps your legs spread, a hand rubbing you through your panties.

You can feel his growing bulge against your back, feel the excitement build. You force yourself to focus on the present, all of your attention on his wandering hands. He’s practically an expert. He always knows just what you need.

Just as you settle into the idea of him taking you here, he pulls his hand away. You shift in his lap, turning to look at him with furrowed brows.

He gives you a gentle shove off of his lap, forcing you to your feet. “Strip for me.”

You look at him dazed, your pussy aching from where his fingers just were. You’re already overwhelmed from the fear and excitement of the situation—your head spinning and erasing all of the thoughts that try to escape.

“What?” He smirks at you, “I wanna see you.”

You turn away from him, keeping your eyes locked at the exit at the end of the aisle. Your hands tremble as you hook them into the waistband of your pants, pulling them down to your ankles.

Mammon grips his bulge through his jeans, grinding against his hand. You’re taking your sweet time stripping for him—always such a tease. He can’t help but notice the gold panties that look absolutely delicious on you.

He licks his lips in anticipation as you lean forward and tug down your panties. They stick to your pussy with your juices and the second they’re removed from your skin, you gasp.

His cock aches in his jeans, straining against the hard denim. He’s quick to unbutton them and kick them off of his fett, leaving them in a puddle on the ground.

You turn around shyly, dressed in only your shirt from the day. You keep your eyes on the tight fabric of his boxers while you cross your arms and tug your shirt over your head. You can feel his gaze on you as you lean forward and jiggle your chest.

You reach behind you slowly and unclip the clasp of your bra, letting the fabric fall loosely down your shoulders. You hate that being exposed like this in the middle of a temple has your pussy dripping. You cross your arms over your chest and take a deep breath, waiting for his instructions.

“Such a pretty, little angel,” he hums. “C’mere.”

You shuffle back towards him, standing between his legs in front of the throne. He trails his hands up your hips, cupping your breasts before letting them fall. The pressure makes you gasp, the cold air of the temple hardening your nipples.

He grabs your hips and spins you around, tugging you hard onto his lap. You can feel his hard cock grinding against the top of your ass as he trails his fingers up your thigh.

He keeps a firm grip on your hip the whole time, as if letting you know that there’s no escape now. He taps your clit with the pad of his finger, pressing hard and rubbing circles. You whine and shut your eyes, attempting to hide your face in his shirt.

Mammon slips a finger inside of you, your pussy eagerly taking him. “Look at you, getting finger fucked in a temple like the whore you are. “ He takes an aggressive pace, thrusting his finger in and out of you with a brutality you’ve never seen from him before.

Another finger slips inside of you and it only gets harder to contain your desperate pleas. Mammon grows frustrated with your muffled whines, curling his fingers inside of you and nipping at your neck. You gasp at the brief pain, but your sounds of surprise are replaced by your lewd moans.

He prods at your dripping hole with another finger. Your eyes widen—it’s rare that you’re able to take three of his fingers, but Mammon is really pushing you to the limit today. Your pussy squelches as he forces the third finger in, stretching your walls almost painfully.

You suck in a deep breath. “Too much!”

Mammon only laughs while he opens you up around his hand. His lips ghost across your neck, leaving kisses all the way up to your ear. He shoves his fingers as deep as they can go, hitting that throbbing spot inside of you.

“Too much?” He mocks, curling his fingers to rub against your walls. “You can take it, I know you can. Look, your pussy is already opening up for me.”

His words only make you wetter, building onto that knot coiling in your tummy. You grip at his forearm, digging your nails into the tanned skin. You don’t even realize as you start to grind your hips against his hand, desperately chasing your release.

Mammon bites at your neck again. “You gonna cum? Hm?”

You nod eagerly, continuing to rock your hips into his palm. Mammon gets the hint and speeds up. Every time you move, you grind your ass further into his waiting cock, driving him wild.

“Go on, baby,” he whispers in your ear, “cum for me.”

Heat washes over you as you cum, your pussy leaking all over Mammon’s hand, the throne and the floor of the temple. Your legs shake, all of your muscles contracting involuntarily. Mammon holds you through your orgasm, keeping his fingers deep inside of you.

“Look at you, makin’ such a mess of the temple. I wonder what your god thinks of you now.”

Horror dawns on you as you remember where you are and what you just did, but Mammon gives you no time to think before he’s nudging you off the throne. You slump on your knees in front of him, looking up at him through your lashes.

You rest your hands on his thighs, watching eagerly as he tugs down his underwear and his cock springs out. He’s rock hard, pre cum dripping down the tip and shaft. You lick your lips at the sight.

“Come on,” he grabs the back of your head and guides you forwards. “It’s not gonna suck itself.”

You wrap your hand around the base of it, slowly stroking up and down. You stick your tongue out and lick the tip, collecting the salty pre on your tongue. Mammon groans, using the grip he has on the back of your head to push your head down.

You gladly take him into your mouth, wrapping your lips around him. He’s big enough that it’s a stretch to fit him in your jaw, and it only takes a few seconds for the tip of his cock to hit the back of your throat. You gag around his length but take a breath through your nose and get a hold of yourself.

“So angelic,” he taunts.

You fall into a steady rhythm of bobbing your head up and down while you stroke his cock, your other hand gently cupping his balls. Mammon’s moans and the wet sounds of you sucking his cock echo off of the walls, serving as shameful reminders.

Mammon thrusts into the back of your throat and holds your head down, forcing you to stay in that position until you tap his thigh harshly. He lets you go, giving you time to catch your breath. The cold air feels nice on your sore throat.

Mammon grabs your hands and helps you off of the floor, letting you straddle his lap. You line up his cock with your soaking pussy and slowly sink down onto him. You lean forwards into his chest and wrap your arms around his shoulders, using him as leverage.

You take him inch by inch, his cock pushing apart your gummy walls and stretching you in the perfect way he always does. When he bottoms out, he’s so deep inside you that it almost hurts. You whine, rolling your hips against him.

Mammon grips your hips so hard you’re sure it’ll bruise and helps guide you up and down his length. He moves his hips up to meet yours as they fall down, forcing himself all the way with every thrust. His fingers dig in as he picks up the pace, his thrusts growing fast and restless.

You can feel that knot in your stomach again, that familiar heat beginning to overtake you. Your legs are tired from bouncing on his cock and your muscles threaten to give out, your whole body shaking. You collapse onto his chest but that doesn’t stop Mammon. He keeps up his demonic pace, thrusting into you ruthlessly.

“M-mammon!”

He drives himself into you harder. Your pussy squeezes his cock harder with every thrust, your slick dripping down and covering his thighs. He slams into you a few more times before you completely unravel, going limp on his chest. Mammon’s cock twitches, his own orgasm following yours. He slams you down, bottoming out completely inside of you as he pumps out his hot cum.

He only gives you a moment to recover before he’s lifting you up and laying you on your stomach on the floor. The cold tiles soothe your feverish skin, though it does nothing to stop the tingling in your pussy. Your eyes flutter open and shut and you’re not sure you’ll be able to take another orgasm.

Mammon’s body presses against your back, his hand snaking around your thighs. He tugs you so that you’re on your knees, your face pressed against the floor. You can feel his still-hard cock lining up with your entrance, every touch of his tip against your clit making you shiver.

His cock slides into you much easier this time, your walls throbbing around him. The overstimulation makes you shiver, a harsh pressure in your stomach. Mammon doesn’t seem bothered, though. The demon drives into you at a steady pace, the combination of his cum and your juices making loud, wet noises.

“My pretty little angel,” he coos, giving your ass a harsh smack, “are ya still with me there, or have I fucked your brain into mush?”

You can only whine in response, that pressure in your stomach consuming you. Mammon smacks your ass again, waiting for an answer.

“It’s too much, Mams, too much,” you manage to mumble.

He slows down his pace to give you a bit of a reprieve. “You can take it, I know ya can.”

You shake your head but you know that will do little to stop him. He keeps his slow pace for only a few minutes, going back to slamming into you like he was before. The break helped you get a little energy back, but your whole body still trembles with oversensitivity.

Mammon thrusts into you so harshly that your whole body moves forwards. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you back into him, repeating the process all over. He channels all of his frustration and anger from earlier today into every movement, channels all of it into your poor, overstimulated pussy.

“Oh—Oh, God!” You cry out, the pressure in your stomach threatening to burst.

Mammon drives his hips into you harshly, wrapping his hand around your throat. “There are no gods here,” he hisses. “Not anymore. You pray to me now.”

That’s all it takes for your third orgasm to wash over you. This one is the harshest yet—your legs shake, black spots dance in your vision and your pussy absolutely gushes all over the place.

Mammon keeps fucking you throughout, chasing his own high. It’s only another minute before he’s bottoming out inside of you and letting all of his cum fill you up. You lay beneath him weakly and let him finish using you.

When he pulls out, the mix of his cum and your juices gushes over the floor. It oozes out of you, getting your thighs and pussy all sticky.

Mammon helps you sit up, planting a kiss to your forehead. Neither of you say much after that. You’re too focused on the heinousness of the acts you just committed in the temple, while Mammon has nothing but pride and admiration.

When the two of you are dressed and somewhat cleaned up, you start the journey back to the Devildom. Both of you notice the ethereal sheen to your skin fading, but neither of you are brave enough to acknowledge what you’ve forsaken.

#obey me mammon #mammon x y/n #mammon x you #mammon x reader #mammon avatar of greed #obey me oneshot #obey me x reader #obey me x you #obey me #obey me smut #mammon smut #kinktober #kinktober 2023

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girlwithamissingpearl · 1 year ago

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I understand things have been dry in Outlander land but even desert dry has me smh. Ladies, if you have to try that hard to shit all over SH, I’m not saying it makes you a hater but it sure as shit doesn’t make you a liker.

Back after a bit- admit it, we all need to occasionally take a break- I feel I needed to pace myself during the drought. But after a bit of scrolling, I felt compelled to dive right in. Isn’t this fandom about fun, entertainment and guilty pleasure? That’s why I’m here. So why the endless posts from the SH haters? Do people dislike SH, enjoy the snark or just think the man is stupid?

So just for fun (or insomnia) I thought I would play a short game of SH: Stupid, Smart or just SMH?

1. SH and Cons/Private events for $

Why do people have such a problem with SH trying to make a living? Most if not all actors part of a series or movie franchise participate. In my opinion SH is doing it now, so he won’t need to in his 60’s to pay the rent. While most fans are priced out of the more exclusive events, all I can say is the paying fans are the only ones that never complain. Supply and demand. If any charitable component is part of the deal, great. So can we finally put a line under this?

Verdict: Smart as hell

2. SH always “Shilling” SS to his Fans and on SM

Uhm, he is the brand. It’s his company. Can it be a bit much? Yes. Promotion to the fan base and the use of sm is marketing 101. In order for people to try the product they need to know about the product. We can disagree as to his methods or success to date, but fans are not the only ones buying bottles. As for the constant and consistent presence of AN with SH during events? Suddenly they are a couple? WTF. AN is a business partner. He owns part of the business. They both work hard promoting SS, and so far it looks like they will continue to release more SS. Ladies, don’t put your lawn chairs away yet!😉

Verdict: Smart

3. SH and boundaries with his fans

Regardless of the letter you attach to SH, he is a recognized actor around the world. Definitely a people pleaser, in imho, he will happily take a selfie with anyone. Obviously, he never wants to disappoint any fan, but his lack of boundaries and security at events can be cringe worthy at times. If a female actor was touched, mauled, or asked to sign fans boobs or t-shirts it would be a #me too moment. Someone, anyone in security or a handler needs to be bad cop if he won’t. How far is too far?

Verdict: Stupid with a side of SMH

4. SH as a Philanthropist and Charitable Causes

This one really bugs me. MPC has raised over $6m for charity. SH’s name attached to any cause raises awareness and $. The BS from the haters who discount this based on the fact SH apparently never donates his own money is petty nonsense. Gentleman’s ride is one example. Agree it was his female fans that made it happen. And? This is my only fandom but SH is held to an impossible standard. Apparently he is a hypocrite in his support for clean oceans because someone on his team had a catered lunch using single use plastics. Great topic for discussion, but the man didn’t throw the containers in the ocean. Also let’s not judge a person’s commitment based on sm posts. SH can literally, yes ladies literally never win. Thankfully the causes he supports do. I dare you to disagree.

Verdict: Smart

5A. SH’s dating life

According to an extremely ardent part of this fandom, SH has dated😉 every fit blonde 👱‍♀️ within a 250 mile radius of everywhere. I wish that someone would keep track of all the mysterious initials and lack of any literal proof of these women. This is where I separate the snark from the hater’s. While I’m in owe of the investigative skills of some, and enjoy the gossip-even though mom thought gossip was a sin, sorry mom- not all women aka initials welcome the attention. Any woman save CB that SH is remotely warranted or not attached to, has an avalanche of hate comments and 💩emoji in their future, welcome or not. Personally, I believe SH, goes out of his way to protect the people he cares about, and perhaps even those he may not. I think we can agree he is not a monk. However an actor is entitled to privacy. Ginger Jesus included.

5B. SH ‘s Sexuality

From the beginning, 3 years for me, I’ve read posts about someone who knew a friend of a friend of a bartender’s friend who knew for a fact SH had a boyfriend. WTF. You know the drought is real when this bullshit gets recycled. We all know the question has been asked and answered by SH. More than once. Next.

Verdict: SH keeping his private life private: Smart as hell.

6. SH and the use of all things Outlander related

If you don’t get it, I don’t have the time and am too lazy to explain it to you.

Verdict: Smart. Smart as hell

7. SH and CB

The only real problem here is obvious. And I don’t know why the fans or even the haters- btw, I use the term haters like I do profanity- perhaps not the best word, but like GFY, FU, MF, C, etc. I’m lazy and it saves time and no confusion to whom I address. So where the actual f&ck is the audition tape we all want to see? You know the part of which I speak. If only the fandom investigators could put aside any petty differences and uncover the SH, CB chemistry kiss tape? I’m not saying it will be a unifying and CTJ moment, but it would give SH fans something to make the drought less….thirsty.

No verdict necessary. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨😚😉

And last but definitely not least…

8. SH and Thirst Traps

Ladies, because of Outlander and all things Outlander related, we’ve had the pleasure to observe SH from every view and lovely angle. Come on, if you 👀 closely it’s all there. Why the actual f&ck people in this fandom have a problem with his shirtless posts is beyond me. Not only is he promoting the results a good fitness regime can produce, he is literally, yes literally giving his fans something they want. And don’t even try me with- you’re treating him like an object. This is a 100% consensual relationship. And if the word “hater” seems harsh about the same gang that complains and shits all over his shirtless thirst traps, then please find me a better name.

Verdict: Smart as hell and thank you

So for those who may not get it, this post is silly and something for my handful of friends or any SH fan to have a laugh. If anyone has the patience to read the entire thing😉 So any comments are welcome, but to the people or person sending awful and cowardly anon messages: save your time. Or GFY. See what I did there?🤓

#outlander #outlander season 7 #sam cait #sam heughan #sassanach #men in kilts #men in kilts 2 #waypoints #clanlands

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sgiandubh · 1 year ago

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Lights, camera, shit show

I was just cleaning my OL folders (all those Chinese paintings and scrolls do take a horrendous amount of space, heh) and I just stumbled upon something I completely forgot to share and discuss with you. I found this particular article during my solitaire lurking months and I remember being befuddled by it for a long time, then thought I've lost it for good.

I don't remember ever seeing it shared or discussed in here, either and if, by any slim chance, I am wrong, kindly forgive me. That professional website is now closed, but its content is still available to browse:

Anyway, there goes: https://www.studiodaily.com/2018/06/outlander-dp-stephen-mcnutt-asc-csc-saucy-scottish-show/

We discussed Terry Dresbach and her inebriated rants, Vanessa Woman's devastating impact on set as Intimacy Coordinator, RDM's jealousy and many other aspects of life on the OL set. Rumors likely to have originated there peppered our shipping trail like flickering lights in a sea of darkness. So yes, we dissected these things to death. But not Stephen McNutt's interview to Studio Daily, on June 22, 2018 - please keep in mind the date, it is essential!

Stephen McNutt is a well-established professional and a member of the American Society of Cinematographers (ASC) and the Canadian Society of Cinematographers (CSC), as he hails from British Columbia. He also has a consistent track record of previous work with RDM, both on Battlestar Galactica and Caprica (its prequel). Therefore, one has to immediately suppose he was handpicked and brought on set by the same RDM, of course: set a very low bar on your expectations, I am warning you.

By the grace of RDM, he was one of the main Directors of Photography for OL during Seasons Two and Three. IMDb is not the best source for corroborating things, because they credit him with 13 episodes in Season Two (including La Dame Blanche- he is the Blue Room guy!), but only one for Season Three (First Wife), which is completely wrong. I even had to check some opening credits on Netflix (at reduced speed, ugh), because he speaks at length of A. Malcolm, something that would have made little sense otherwise. He was there, of course: and his is a first-hand account, heavily loaded with both innuendo and TPTB bullshit, up to the point of complete incoherence.

We focus on the three final questions:

This is a study in bullshitology, right here. The question asked is very clear and very technical: how did you approach those famous love scenes?

The answer is a mumble jumble of retcon, deflections, slips and overall impossible scramble for a logical explanation. I am doing a line by line, because this is almost too good to be true:

'(...) But as far as Cat and Sammy making love (...)' : um, hello and excuse me, I thought the question was about Jamie and Claire?!? And then we are delusional and can't fucking separate, when your own henchman, the Director of Photography no less, seems to be totally unable to do so, too? Hello? Also: 'Sammy'? 'Sammy'? What. The. Total. Fuck, and I LOLed then and I am still LOLing now. Terms of endearment overheard on set - but no, here comes the 'friendship' shite, hitting the narrative fan with Mach 5 speed. Objective? Explaining in a plausible way the hugging and 'keeping warm'. And I am sorry, but this begs the question: what the hell did this man see on that set? And how many people did see the same, hence the need to release such a gratuitous lie, for pure retconning purposes?

'They are not an item at all - I think she just got married'. Oh, fuck my life, man: you are such a terrible, terrible liar! Remember, that interview was taken in June 2018: after the OZ EFH and just about when C. was gleefully answering 'oh, God forbid!' every time she was prompted by press about her marriage plans. How can somebody with a pretty high trophic level and personal rapport to both S and C be totally unaware about C's marital status at the time? How can a long time acquaintance and coworker of RDM say no both to a friend and to a current boss (same person, the worst case scenario) asking for a favor, in that particular context? It also goes to prove that the shit show plot mainlines never originated with S and C and that the Remarkable Week-end was already planned for quite some time. By TPTB. With the full knowledge of RDM.

Let's suppose Mr. McNutt was so deeply engrossed in his work as not to notice all the people who must have congratulated C on set. I mean, I know who our (spinster) colleague from Accounting is currently banging and that guy is (mercifully) not among our staff (I totally wish them well, btw). Maybe because nobody congratulated C on that fakegagement? Also, you know them well enough to confidently say 'they are not an item', but don't know she was not married at the time and state an enormity with the same confidence? What in the name of the hoo-ha did I just read, here?

'I was always in such amazement of that.' In amazement of exactly what, Mr. McNutt? Surely not a woman holding hands or keeping warm with her gay co-star on set, huh? I mean, I need the best American English dictionary, here:

Again: what the heck did this man see? What comments did he hear? Surely, 'amazement' is a very precise choice of wording, with particularly enlightening synonyms:

Hence the need to end the demonstration with a deflection: 'They would just have fun.' You know, there is no such thing as a virgin whore, Mr. McNutt: you either are in such astonishment or you think your pals, good old S and C, such a funny girl, were having, well... 'fun', what else? You can't logically have both in the same paragraph!

And there we go: 'a very collegial atmosphere on set'. The answer is pure fool's gold, if you ask me: 'Nobody goes to sit in a trailer or says they aren’t showing up that day. '

And I laughed. And I laughed. And I laughed. I really don't know what this man is talking about. I never heard McTavish telling S to get out of that trailer ('nephew'). I never read the 'two very loved-up birdies' in a trailer a-rockin' Anons. I never watched that 2015 Anglophile SDCC interview, when S mentioned listening in their shared trailer to Erasure's Oh, l'Amour and C immediately reacted ('oh, did you just admit to that?'). But unlike me, McNutt must have been legally bound by a big cojones Non-Disclosure Agreement and morally bound by loyalty towards RDM, his friend, boss and benefactor.

This. All of the above. This is the real reason for all the bullshit you've just read: explaining a real, shocking love story by socially progressive regulations, allowing the cast to be 'much more happy'. I would laugh some more, if this was not sinister and cruel, in fact.

It is Love. A deep, strong one. But the seeds of the adverse narrative were planted early and deep, forcing even decent people like this guy to lie and smear himself a bit in the process. What we see and hear now are but better worded and more refined consequences of that fateful January 2016 morning in LA. And since I am allowed the dubious luxury only a healthy distance in time allows, let me remind you a simple, fun fact about this interview who stated they were never an item:

About ten months after McNutt uttered these words, the fandom was hit by the Covfefe Pics.

I rest my case.

#shitshow #fandom

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therealplaguedoctor · 28 days ago

Text

A Stupid Bet

Esteban Ocon x driver!reader

Summary/prolong (idek anymore)- You made a stupid bet with Esteban, well he asked you to agree to it and you did. Little did you know how soon after that promise the conditions would be meet and everyone will know....

Warnings/content- fem reader, no use of y/n, 2nd person (you/your), Esteban in alpine, talks about media being kinda(?) sexist only for a sec tho, doubts about your position again only for a sec, lmk if i missed anything

Non serious warnings: reader has no nationality mentioned (actually surprising for me lol), author is a dumbass and pretends she knows shit(she doesnt), American spelling, I never spell check. Idk what a kilometer is,

F/c- n/a

A/n- woke up in a cold sweat wrote down this fic idea and asked my friends who it should be on. First person (and only one) to respond wanted Estie bestie so this is for you, you know who you are lol love youuu

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

A stupid bet. It all happened cause of a stupid bet.

It was just before COTA you and Esteban where both on his couch watching a random movie that neither of you cared to much for.

"Amour" Esteban says softly as he looked over to you something slightly unveiling in his eyes...mischief...?

"Yeah..?" You answered a little worried about what he might say

"You wanna make a bet?" He smiled definitely mischief in his eyes

You smiled "depends what's the bet?"

"If we're both on the podium in one of the remaining races can I kiss you on it?" He asked with a slightly begging tone

You and Esteban had been dating for slightly over a year now. Somehow being able to keep your relationship under wraps. You haven't talked to much about making your relationship public. There has been some talk when you started dating of course an there was the whole discussion you had to have with Alpine about your relationship. And so so many NDAs people had to sign. It was insane.

"You know that will never happen estie" you chuckled

"Hey a man can dream" he smiled "..so if it does can we?" He asks again

"Of course" you smiled as you pushed him down on the couch in a hug laughing

He laughed as well kissing your forehead "I love you mon amour"

"I love you too Esteban"

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

It was the brazil gp and it was hell.

"Okay one lap left, one lap left" you heard your race engineer buzzed in your ear. You wanted to yell at him to shut up as you drove. You were sweating bullets. You were currently in p3, Esteban was p2. This would mean monumental points for the team if you crossed the finish line like this. Which is proving more difficult with the current track conditions yet-

"That is the checkered flag, p3 that is p3. Congratulations"

"WOOOOO OH MY FUCKING GOD"

"You and Esteban are one podium great job, great job" you could here the cheers in the background as your race engineer talked your smile grew wider with each cheer.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You slowly pulled up to the p3 plaq and parked the car. You slowly climbed out standing on the halo you cheered doing your celebration. Before jumping down and running over and jumping into your team. You almost get swallowed by your team so many hands, cameras, flashes, you eventually get released by your team.

You turn to see Esteban you quickly hug eachother helmets bumping before you pushed eachother to arms length to look eachother in the eyes. Both of you held the other shoulders while you couldn't see his mouth you could see the scrunching of his eyes, and he could see yours. Both your jaws will definitely be hurting from smiling so much.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You both were walking into the cool down room the atmosphere was buzzing. Esteban leaned over and asked in a quiet voice "you remember our bet?" He asked

"How could I forget?" Is all you respond with a smile still plastered on your face.

The cool down room felt like hours as you Estie and Max chatted it was smiles all around.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

The Dutch nation anthem rang out before the trophies where handed out you held yous up high before placing down softly with a satisfying clunk. And before you knew it the celebration music rang out as you all popped your champaign and drenched eachother.

You wiped the fizzling liquid from your eyes and face before taking a swig of the liquid as it satisfyingly fizzled down your throat. You look over to Esteban who had just appeared at your side you both smiled.

Esteban and you clicked the large bottles together both taking another swig.

Just then he pulls you into him, hand gentle but firm. With that he kisses you and of course you kiss back. I mean who would you be if you don't kiss your own boyfriend back? His hand rested on the back of you neck, and you hands were lazily thrown over his shoulders.

Your heart rate spiked as yet the world seem to slow the loud cheers of the crowd lulled into nothingness it was just you and Esteban for a moment. As you shared a gentle and passionate kiss.

That was until you felt something cold wet and undeniably champagne. The kiss broke so both you and Esteban didn't drown in the sweet liquid both looking over to the source:

Max fucking Verstappen with a shit eating grin plastered on his face.

You smiled and so did Esteban, you three laughed as you held the champagne up high cheering the world.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You really didn't want to go to the media pen.

I mean you and Esteban didn't think the bet entirely through. What would the media response be? Will all your accomplishments be given to your boyfriend?

You have gotten your phone a while ago but you didn't bother to even turn it on scared of what the media would say.

But why should you be scared? You and Esteban have been dating for a year. Wayyyyy after you joined formula one. And you loved eachother and the media could not change that.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You finally entered the media pen just to be met with a loud cheers. Esteban quickly took notice to you as he was standing just by where you entered he quickly motioned you over to do the interview with him.

"There's my beautiful girlfriend" he smiles which you swear is bigger than when he won his first grand prix "hello mon amour"

"Hi estie" you smiled

Quickly though the interviewer got to work: "Hello to both of you" he said "well first I should say congrats, and of course I'm assuming this relationship isn't new..?"

You spoke first "no me and Estie have been together for a year actually back in Singapore" Esteban just smiled and nodded.

"And of course we can speculate all we want but I'm sure many people want to know did you decide to do this before hand or was this spur of the moment?" The interviewer asked

"Well it as actually a bet" Esteban said

"A stupid bet" you added

He playfully rolled his eyes "I asked her before COTA that if we both got on the podium in one of the remaining races if I could kiss her on it" he explained

"And of course I agreed" you smiled

The interview concluded and you were surprised no one made any negative comments about your relationship.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You both arrive back at your shared hotel room (which Alpine was happy about because they only had to pay for one room). You finally take out your phone unlock it ready to see all the hateful messages only to see none.

You smiled as you looked though them:

User: I mean have you seen how Esteban looks at her how did we not figure it out sooner????

User: I want what they have

User: THE MADE THAT BET IN AN APLINE BRO JCKSNJDKS BOTH OF EM JXNOSKA

User: can we point out the fact that the kiss made basically ALL the media not pay any attention to the Max master class? I think that's hilarious as a Max fan

User: No cause the photo of Max spraying them with champagne as they kissed is so cute imma cry

User: mama y papa

User: I will never understand how Esteban pulled HER

User: Esteban is stronger than me cause if I had her as a gf she would be ALL OVER my social media

User: she called Esteban estie and he called her mon amour if you need me I'll be crying THEIR SO CUTEEE

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

You laughed as you read the tweets. You've never been happier.

Esteban comes back into the room freshly showered, "what are you looking at mon amour?" He asked

"Just twitter" you said as you show him you screen "everyone loves us"

"I mean what isn't there to love about you?" Estie said

"Smooth" you smiled "is that what you say to all the girls"

"Only the ones I'll marry some day" He says with the biggest grin

"I love you Estie" you smiled as you leaned over and kiss his cheek

"I love you more" he said back kissing you in return

"Impossible"

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

A/n: OMFG I LOVE THIS I HOPE YALL DO IK IT WAS A BIT SCUFFED WTV PLEASE LIKE REBLOG OR WHATEVER YOU WANT THEY ARE VERY APPRECIATED IDK WHY IM STILL YELLING LOVE YALLLLLL

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #formula one fanfiction #formula one x reader #esteban ocon x reader #esteban ocon #x reader

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bonecoatvodtranscripts · 10 months ago

Text

Transcript: talking about something more serious (Shubble VOD 2/21/2024)

youtube

CWs: physical abuse, emotional abuse/gaslighting, financial abuse, mentions of sexual assault

Feel free to reupload this transcript anywhere, I really don't care about credit for this one

Hello!

I don't know if you can even hear it. I put on, like, light jazz in the background because it seemed awkward being quiet, but I don't think you can hear it, so I'm just going to turn it off. Hello.

Welcome. We are in emote-only cause I'm just going to be talking today and then I'm going to go. I'm going to go. Yeah, it was very very low. There's no need. I just - it felt weird leaving you in silence, but I'm here, so.

Hello. I want to talk about something today that... I'm very nervous. I feel sweaty. I had a sweater on. I had to take it off. I'm going to try and just - I wrote down pretty much everything I think that I want to say, to keep track of all the points that I want to make sure I don't forget anything, so I will be reading from something a good portion of the time, but not 100% of the time. And I just wanted to make sure I got all of my thoughts down in words ahead of time. I really like writing down my thoughts, so I did that.

Oh, hold on. Can I turn ads off? I think that maybe we turn ads off today. (laughs) How do I make that happen for just today? I should have had that already. I actually don't even know how to make that happen. You know what? That's just going to have to be that way. I'm so sorry, um... I'm all good.

Yeah, okay. Today's just going to be talking. I'm just going to start reading from what I wrote and go from there. I have a really big coffee. I'm going to take a swig. (drinks some coffee) And I have my water, and I'm going to take a swig of that. (drinks some water)

I have always liked telling my different experiences that I've had in dating, because it feels important to me to share what I've learned and maybe help other people to not make the same mistakes that I have before. I'm 30. I've dated a lot. I've gone on a lot of dates. I keep trying, and it's unfortunate that a lot of my dating history, there were a lot of bad people that tried to manipulate or control me. But that's not to say that every person that I've dated has treated me poorly. Some people just weren't the right people. And speaking out about my bad experiences has never felt as important as it does right now, because silence has always brought me peace, and this time it feels like my silence is not keeping my peace. It's only keeping somebody else's peace.

And I never thought that I could be the kind of person to end up in a situation like I did. I never thought that could happen to me. And so for me this is important, because it could help anybody else see the signs sooner than I did, or hopefully avoid a similar situation entirely, because... (deep breath) The truth is it was dangerous.

There were a lot of things wrong in this relationship that, um... I endured some pretty terrible treatment. And I might touch on some things here and there about that, if I feel like it's important to the overall context. But what I want to stay focused on is this specific issue, and the things that happened matter-of-factly and the things that people saw and witnessed in our circle.

It took me 10 months after to heal, and I spoke with multiple therapists and tried different forms of therapy. I tried somatic therapy. That one was actually really good for me, because that one actually helped me release a lot of built-up anger I was having over the last year. But the anger that I was feeling was for myself, because I felt like I should have known better. I felt so stupid at myself for staying through all of this. And I shared my story with a lot of friends after I started talking to therapists, and I was like, So this thing happened and I wasn't really sure. It just seems weird now to me, looking back. And all of them told me exactly what was happening in the words that I was too afraid to use. And I was being hurt in my last relationship, and it took me all of that time to see it through that lens. I even posted an anonymous story to Reddit that I have now deleted, with an anonymous account, but in posting that, I found a dozen other stories that were exactly like mine, exactly the same way. And all of the comments said exactly the same thing.

And I was so mad at myself because I was lying, too, at a certain point, to protect this person, because I knew that if I told my friends the truth, it would make him look really bad.

I didn't think that I would cry, and I practiced saying all of this and I didn't cry, but it's easier to practice it when no one is listening.

But he always cared more about how it looked, and that was really important. Not what was true. And it was really subtle. When I hear about... When I hear about physical abuse, I think of hitting. I think of hitting and punching. So I thought that this wasn't violent enough to be abuse. I thought that it was just, like, a constant accident that he kept hurting me. But he's not hitting me.

And it didn't start as something that he did to hurt me. He had this habit of biting, which is so weird to me now, but he said that he had this habit since he was a kid, and even his mom said that that was true, and he said it was just affectionate, and that might have been... I mean, I think that might have been true maybe at the start, but I also feel that I have good reason to believe that every part of it was a lie. But that's just my personal opinion.

And I had no problem with just biting. That isn't even the most uncommon thing. But he did mention something early that I should have taken as a red flag. And he want wanted to make sure that I was okay with him biting me, because he didn't want me to come back later and say that he abused me, which I thought was really weird considering he had never hurt me before, and so why would I call it abuse, and why was he thinking about that? And I thought he was being sweet, checking on me to make sure that I was still comfortable, but of course I was, because he hadn't hurt me. And why would I think he ever would?

And then he did for the first time, by accident. And I don't specifically remember the actual first time that he bit me too hard by accident, because I didn't think that it would be significant. I thought that it would only happen once. And he started biting me more and more over a period of time, sort of throughout the whole relationship, and accidents of him biting too hard and really hurting me happened more and more frequently. But he always seemed genuinely sorry, and he decided that he didn't want to keep accidentally hurting me. So we were going to use a safeword so he could learn where my limit was, where my pain tolerance ended. And saying that out loud now doesn't sound - like, that's not very sound logic. But at the time, I thought he cared about not hurting me, but in reality it's like, why are you biting so hard? And why do you have to bite so hard? And it shouldn't be that hard of a problem to stop. That shouldn't be that hard.

And he disguised it as this really quirky part of our relationship, and was so comfortable sharing it with his friends, to the point that he would do it in front of them. He thought it was this really funny story to tell, and a good bit to take my arm and bite me in front of everybody until I literally shout in pain. And then I have to laugh it off, because I'm so embarrassed and I don't want to cause a scene in front of our friends, and I'm sure everyone was a little bit uncomfortable, but as long as I was saying that it was fine, nobody really felt like they needed to be concerned, and that's not anybody's fault, because I was lying. I was lying, and it wasn't fine, because I would go home later and I'd tell him how uncomfortable I was, how much I didn't like being hurt all the time, and I needed him to really stop biting so hard. I didn't like it, and I tried telling him over and over again, because he-

[VOD cuts] - asked him to stop again. This time he said, This is who he is. He isn't going to change. Those were his words. And I remember a lot of specifically his words about certain things, especially at the end, because I'm good at remembering words. Especially his wording, I became really good at remembering, because he was constantly contradicting himself. And I would notice, but most of the time it wasn't worth picking a fight over. But he would fight me on it sometimes, cause I would point it out, and he would insist that he had never said the thing

that he said, he definitely did say. And then he would say something like, "How are you so sure you're remembering correctly? Why are you always right?" And he definitely said the things that I heard him say, and other people heard him say.

So he had, now, at this point, weaponized the safeword, and was using it to ensure that I was hurt and on a constant basis, and he wasn't sorry anymore. I couldn't even tell you the last time he had apologized for doing it anymore, because now sometimes he would bite me, and I would yell out the safeword because it hurt so bad, and he'd clamp down even harder. Just for a second, just for good measure, before letting go. And sometimes I'd say the safeword, and he'd grind his teeth down on my skin, and sometimes he'd smile after, like a gloating grin.

And during this time I was filled with so much anxiety all the time that I was constantly nauseous, gagging daily, on occasion throwing up because of the pit that was in my stomach. I never told him about that, though. I was going and running away quietly to throw up in the toilet and rejoin our group of friends. But I felt so unwanted and ignored. And I would tell him that, and then he would reassure me that he wanted to be together and he loved me. He loved me more than I loved him, even. He would always insist that that was true. Like that, "I love you." "I love you more." But he was, like, really serious about it.

And looking back, I do believe that the way I was swept off my feet at the beginning of this relationship was 100% love bombing. And we were friends for a time. At least, people would have thought that, actually, but I use the word "friend" very loosely, because we had actually never spoke to each other outside of group chats we were in together, like, a handful of times throughout the whole time that we knew each other, but did not talk to each other. so I wouldn't have even called him my friend. Until he found out I was single, waited a few weeks to reach out, and then we started a friendship. And then that friendship turned romantic, and then he made these huge romantic gestures. He wrote me the most beautiful love letter that I had ever read. He called me his soulmate. He talked about forever one month in. He told me he hadn't been in a relationship in 5 years. He thought he could never find love again before he met me. He said he wanted someone to grow with. He wanted to be a dad. He had all his names picked out. And I didn't have a preference, because my feeling of it is, if the timing is right, and with the right person I could. But if that doesn't work out in time, or the timing, you know, I'm not super pressed about it.

But I started opening my mind up to the idea with him, because it seemed so important to him. And I kept trying to talk to him to figure out where he was later on when I could tell things were declining, and now, all of a sudden he's telling me he's not sure he wants kids at all. In fact, he has never been attached to the idea of kids. And I told him that isn't what he said before, and he said he's allowed to change his mind. And I'm of the opinion that in a relationship, there are a few things that you are not actually allowed to change your mind without letting your partner know. I think that kids is one of them. It wasn't even important to me. And I think marriage is one of them, so I brought that up next. And I asked if he still wanted marriage. He said he wanted to marry me. And then he said now, "I'm not the-" this is a quote, "I'm not the commitment guy. You know that."

I didn't know that. Why are you dating me? In fact, he was telling me the exact opposite every day. He would tell me he still wanted to be together. He wanted to work on all of the problems. He wanted me at the end of everything. He did not want to break up. He made that very clear.

I have, though, caught him in lies before, but usually it was small stuff, and again, I didn't want to - It wasn't anything that ever seemed worth rocking the boat over. Which isn't normal for me. I hate lies. And yet I ended up lying for him. But he had lied about big things, and he had also been caught lying by his friends numerous times. So this is something that he feels is acceptable to do.

And everything reached a breaking point when he was about to leave for an extended period of time. We were not going to see each other very much- a few days out of every few months. And now suddenly he is dumping all of these problems that he has been having feelings about all of this time later. At one point he said he's been feeling this way a couple months. At another point he says he's been feeling this way for six months, immediately contradicting himself in the same conversation. And with no time to do anything about it. I arrive the one of- Never mind. I'm going to get to something later. But I literally arrived for 3 days for this conversation to happen and then leave.

(cat mews) My cat just woke up and she's not usually awake right now. (leans to cat, offscreen) Hi, my love. It's really close to her dinner time. I should have fed her early.

So, no time to fix any of the problems all of a sudden, because there are three days before he leaves. And he insisted he did not want to break up. And so he was expecting me to have a solution somehow magically, and I gave a number of solutions that would have a way forward for us to be together, but he refused to make any compromise whatsoever. And he said that the relationship was starting to feel like a responsibility towards the end. Also his words. So it wasn't a responsibility the whole rest of the time to him.

And he was at this point basically flaunting that he would never prioritize me over anything. (talking to cat, indistinct) And I wasn't even asking for literally even the bare minimum. I was asking for so little. And he - I was watching him give exactly what I was needing in the relationship all over the place to anybody else who just happened to ask and just wasn't me.

And also, he was never going to prioritize me over anything that would give him more fame or money. In fact, he said that himself. That was exactly why he was not going to compromise at all for a solution for us to be together, because he said he wanted to see how much fame and money he could get. And I just thought we wanted to be together. I thought that's what we both wanted, because that's what he was still saying he wanted, too.

But then he also admitted to me that he had grown to resent me. And I have to be thankful that he said that bit out loud - a lot of these bits, he said out loud - because that was the last push that I needed to get myself out. He had grown resentful, which I also pointed out that there was no reason to feel that way, and he admitted that there was no reason for him to feel that way either. I think that it was because I'm someone who can communicate how I feel.

But I don't know. I have a lot of theories and reasons why I believe things happened the way that they did, and why he was lying all of the time. But he was resentful of me, was causing me physical harm every day, multiple times a day, despite me telling him over and over again to stop. He wasn't going to change and he wasn't going to end the relationship. He was going to keep hurting me, and it was possibly going to escalate even further. So I broke up with him. And I didn't even want to, because I couldn't even see for such a long time after what it really was that had

happened, that he had abused me. And in fact we left things as, we want to be friends, and he can never imagine not speaking to me again. And then he never spoke to me again, outside of, like, a couple of exchanges where I needed to ask for my clothes to be shipped, so at least I got my clothes back. I had a whole closet full. However, he did throw away all of my other things without saying a word to me about it. Hundreds of dollars of things from my office were trashed without a word. And I didn't block him till 10 months later because I wanted an open door still. I really thought I wanted to be his friend. But, uh, I don't feel that way anymore.

I do believe he was bottling up so many emotions, and he would never talk about how he felt. I think he even - I mean, he did admit that he felt like he couldn't say it any sooner, like there was just no possible way to say how he was feeling sooner than the absolute last possible chance. Not even a chance, because 3 days before he left - that was actually a lie too, also. He didn't leave for another week after I left. He brought me in, had this three-day conversation. He was supposed to leave, and then he stayed for another week before he left with all of the friends that I was also meant to see, but he had lied to me about the dates, too.

But I do believe that he was bottling up so many emotions that he was taking it out on me physically. I believe there was a moment where he knew that he didn't want to be in the relationship anymore, and instead of just ending it, he tried to push me away any way he knew would hurt me. And he knew all of the ways that would hurt me the most. And he knew he was hurting me. There was no way that he didn't know, because of the safeword that he made, and he just didn't care. He was hurting me, and he didn't care, and even looked like he was enjoying it sometimes.

And I can look back now and I can see all these instances that were really major red flags. There was this one time that he pinned me down and asked me to try my absolute hardest to get him off of me. And I couldn't do it, obviously, and he said something to make the point that he was so much stronger than me that I wouldn't be able to fight him back. Fight back against what? What do you mean? You don't say shit like that to people. That's insane. And I was also sexually assaulted by my first boyfriend, and he knew that.

He had stopped giving anything to the relationship, and he said that why was because he was just waiting for things to change on their own. He said he also didn't have the time or energy anyway to do the things that I was asking for, but then would constantly make any bit of time and energy for anybody and anything but me. And he would say he wanted more quality time, so then I would try to arrange things for us to do online because we were long distance, but then he would complain that he doesn't want to spend all of his time on the computer anymore. And then we'd be there in person and all he wants to do is stay inside, play games on his computer, watch movies. He doesn't want to go out.

And I'm not saying any of this next part to be mean. He lived in filth like I have never seen. And I've seen filth. This was the worst. He would spill things on the floor and never, literally never clean them up. He got an ant infestation once, and wasn't going to do anything about it because he said he said "Bugs are normal in British houses," so I had to buy ant killer. And he wouldn't clean his bathroom for months and months and months, but would constantly complain about how bad it smelled, and I would tell him, "That's mold. It's mold." He complained about being tired all the time, too, which I don't know if that was a lie or not, but mold will do that too. But he would insist that it wasn't, somehow, without having cleaned in months, but it's not mold.

When I met him, he was washing his clothes without detergent. Just he wasn't using that at all, and I don't know for how long before I met him. He was just running it with water and then hanging it on his filthy kitchen cabinets. And I felt bad. I felt bad because I felt like he needed someone to help him learn how to be cleaner. I thought he just didn't know how. And I listened to all of the struggles of his upbringing, and I was like, he just doesn't know how. Someone just needs to show him. And then I found out that he said he doesn't clean at all when I'm not there, because he just waits for me to get there to do it. And I only found out about that after we broke up, because he said it behind my back.

I was doing all of the cleaning and laundry for him. Also, I had a separate bathroom. I want to make that clear I wasn't using that bathroom. I had a separate bathroom that I cleaned for myself. I had cleaning supplies. I don't think he even actually knew I had cleaning supplies in there. But I had my own bathroom.

All the cleaning, all the laundry, all of it. I was paying for all of the, like, paper towels, soap. All of that only stayed in the house so long as I was buying it. I would arrive and there would just not be toilet paper in the whole house. There were paper towels instead. And who knows for how long, too. I was paying for food more than half the time, because he would often push me into ordering food for us, even if I had paid for the last meal or the meal before that. And I'm of the opinion now that I shouldn't have been paying for any food. None at all, But I wanted to, at least, I thought I was being equal by at least doing, like, a back and forth. But I ended up paying for food more often than just going back and forth anyway. And he would do this to his friends all the time, too.

But I was also paying for every plane ticket and the catsitter, which cost roughly the amount of a plane ticket to England. And he never offered to help me pay after the couple of times he did come here to visit me, because he paid for the flights that we would both take. But that only happened twice at the very beginning. I have actually had a friend tell me that this is financial abuse, but I don't know enough about that to say for myself. But I was telling him that I couldn't afford it all by myself all the time, because I was losing money. I was never able to work properly there, and he wasn't traveling at all to see me anymore, even though he said he would. That was, like, the basis of our entire relationship starting off. So then he agreed to pay for the catsitter so that it would be basically paying half the cost of my travels. And he did that once. (pause) And then never did it again despite many more months of dating. And I was traveling often. I had to, because he was worried that we weren't spending enough quality time together. And then all of the time that he would have ever extra, he would choose - choose - to not spend it on me, because there was an available choice and he chose not to spend it with me often.

And I did everything short of just up and move there, which I was willing to do the whole time, and I told him that I was willing to do it and he knew, but he insisted that I don't. He insisted not to. He was planning to move here. That was supposed to happen first. And then at the end of the relationship, he said maybe things would have been different if I lived there. If I lived there, like I had said I would the whole time, and he insisted I don't. Maybe that could have saved the relationship.

And I say all of this because I believe that people like this are genuinely dangerous. I believe he is dangerous. He was willing to lie. He was willing to do harm to someone he claimed to love more than anyone he has ever loved. His actions escalated, and I don't think that I'll be the last person that he hurts. And I felt like sharing my story was really important to warn people. I want people to see the signs that I refused to. I want you to listen to your body and get out as soon as possible. Tell your friends the truth and let them help you.

I really thought I couldn't - because I had been sexually assaulted in a previous relationship. I just thought I was so much smarter. And I was like, if someone ever laid their hands on me, I'd leave immediately. It would never happen a second time. But you just, it just kind of happened so slowly over time, and got worse and worse and worse until the point where there's no way to deny the fact that he was hurting me and he knew and didn't care. That's just the kind of thing that I keep repeating to myself when I'm like, "But was it bad enough? It wasn't violent enough." But I was being hurt multiple times every single day, days and days and days and days for a month at a time in a row.

And I'm not even speaking on most - because I did touch on other things, but I am not even speaking on most of the other things that, in my opinion, I do think that there are some things that are across a line that make you a bad person. I don't think that most people can be defined in a black-and-white "you're good or you're bad," but I do believe that there's a line that you can cross, and only bad people will do the things on the other side of that line, you know what I mean?

And the number of - (voice breaks, covers her mouth) I only cry now when I'm talking about my friends! Who also dealt with such shitty things from shitty people! But I'm also so, so grateful for all of my friends who were with me through this whole thing, and my friends who also were experiencing similar sorts of situations, at the same time, and we kind of went through it together. So I think they are the strongest people in the whole world, and they made me feel like the strongest people in the whole world today. Did I call myself people? I meant person. I feel like the strongest people - (laughs) I did it again. I feel like the strongest person. They made me feel so brave. I felt impenetrable today.

But I am going to go now because my friends are coming over and we're immediately going to go become distracted by watching Love is Blind. I already watched all of it already, and I don't care. So thank you for listening. Thank you everyone who gifted subs. I am going to be taking the rest of the week off from streaming. I have a video going out on Saturday, and I'll be back next week, and you won't hear about any of this again for a while, probably, but thank you all.

I don't really even know what to do now. I think I'm just going to end. Go spread love all over the place on Twitch right now, and I'll see you.

#shubble #shubble vods #wilbur situation #abuse tw #abuse cw #Youtube

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fxrmuladaydreams · 1 year ago

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Could you write something about (I don’t know of you seen the whole Taylor swift and Travis kelce) but maybe something like that with Danny and famous!reader who shows up for the US gp with enchante merch but they’ve actually been dating for a while. Thank you!

send me daniel thoughts (sfw & nsfw) for danny ric weekend ~today is the last day~

Photos of you flooded practically every social media platform there was. After releasing a new album that topped the charts and announcing a tour to go along with it, fans were eating up any and all content they could get from you.

People were surprised to see you in the AlphaTauri social media feed. Usually someone with as big a name as you would be a guest at a bigger garage, like Red Bull or Mercedes. But photos of you hanging out with Daniel and Yuki, wearing an AlphaTauri cap on your head had been circulating like crazy.

You watched the race from the garage with a set of headphones over your ears. Your eyes were glued to the screens in the surrounding area, watching the cars zoom around the track.

You felt a chill creep up your spine, and grab onto your sweatshirt, pulling it over you to keep warm. A camera had happened to catch you doing so, and in turn gave anyone who was watching the race a view of your new attire. The large Enchante logo now on display for everyone.

Fans went crazy. All of a sudden Twitter was flooded with conspiracy theories about you and Daniel. Are you two dating? Is that why you were an AlphaTauri guest? How long had you and the Australian driver actually known each other?

You and Daniel had discussed this before the race, knowing that it would create an uproar, but after being together in secret for so long you both decided that you were ready to share your relationship with the rest of the world.

You were there to greet Daniel as soon as he was finished with his post race media duties. His skin was shiny with sweat, his dark curls sticking to his forehead. As soon as he saw you a grin broke out on his face. Even a poor result couldn’t shake the pure joy he had from seeing you.

You threw your arms around each other as Daniel lifted you off the ground and spun you around. He ducked his head down to press a kiss against your lips. It was a little sloppy, his hands awkwardly gripping onto your hips, and the brim of his hat bumping against your head.

Yuki was able to take a photo of the shared moment between the two of you and sent it to you. You later posted the photo together with the caption -

I’ve loved you three summers now honey, but I want ‘em all

#daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo #dr3 #danny ric weekend

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pluto-supremacy · 10 months ago

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Will there be a part three of the Vi dating femreader at Stillwater where the Reader gets out of Stillwater and Vi makes it up to the Reader after they reunite? Maybe either the Reader gets out on her own and they reunite in Zaun or Vi comes back to get her out like she promised and they are reunited that way and she makes up for all the lost time since she left her there and promises she will never leave her again, that she loves the Reader with all her mind, body and soul. If Caitlyn is there she apologizes to both Vi and the Reader for separating them once she sees them together and how they are with each other and that she should have fought harder to get the Reader out the first time before Vi and Reader have their life after Stillwater, then maybe a time skip or something where we see Vi and the Reader living together and after Stillwater. That part two was heart-wrenching and would love for Vi to make good on her promise of coming back for the Reader like she said she would, so they can be free and live a better life outside of Stillwater.

Vi Fic: Miss Me?

➼ I'm so glad everyone is liking the Vi series! This will likely be the last part, at least for Stillwater. Maybe I'll have little au's as to how the story ends. Have some fluff to make up for what I put y'all through last time

➼ Continuation of Vi Fic: Bye Bye Bun

➼ This definitely diverges from canon, so please keep that in mind. I didn't have it in me to give an angsty ending (this time). Consider this a little fix-it fic for the end of season 1

➼ No beta we die like some random enforcer (I've officially run out of people season 2 come faster)

➼ Warnings: None!

GIF does not belong to me! All credits to the owner

The days started to blur together. Each passing moment seemed more painful than the last. Vi left you. Left you with that enforcer to rot in Stillwater. Sure she promised to come back, and for a while you were hopeful. Vi had no reason to just leave you behind. That didn't make any sense. Even with the warden saying he could ‘only release one’. Bullshit. Vi should’ve fought harder. She could’ve gotten both of you out, you knew that. If this enforcer needed her so bad then she’s have to do what she asked, even against the warden’s wishes.

While it was hard to keep track of time behind bars, you were certain it had been at least a week. Or it at least felt like a week. Around day three you had lost all hope that your girlfriend was coming back for you. What could take her this long? Nothing. Absolutely nothing in your eyes at least. Vi didn’t even offer an explanation, just that she’d be back. Who does that? Certainly there had been enough time for her to at least say something like 'If I don't go they'll kill me'. Was that even what happened? Or was this the out Vi had been looking for? Had she ever even cared..?

Some days you went with no. Others it was yes. No was the more common answer now. Well hopefully that enforcer was happy with what she had done. What relationship she had torn apart. It was just after lunch when you had been returned back to your cell. Lately you haven't had much of an appetite, the prison uniform you wore hanging slightly looser than usual. It was hard to eat when all you could think about was what Vi could be doing. Fighting. Cheating. Running away. Dying. Of course you only imagined the worst. Never that she was currently racing towards Stillwater like a man on a mission.

Which she was.

The last few days had gone by so fast and so slow at the same time for Vi. Each time she closed her eyes she saw you, she saw Powder, she saw the both of you begging her not to leave. It haunted her, plagued her every waking thought. The guilt of leaving you behind was eating her alive. If it wasn't for how many times she had gotten her ass kicked lately she might've had time to really revel in the fact that she may have lost you forever. She would fix this though. Vi knew that she would. Part one of her plan was already complete.

She had Powder back. For the most part.

After the little dinner party ended with Silco dying, Vi pleaded with her younger sister. Pleaded with her to do the right thing for Milo, for Claggor, for Vander, for her. At the last second it seemed like her Jinx persona had began crumbling away. She dropped the weapon she had built and ran to her older sister, crying and hugging her tight. Catilyn, who had been tied up and gagged by a mask, was relieved to say the least.

After untying both of them Powder handed over the gemstone to Caitlyn. She hadn't wanted it anyways, not really. It was Silco who planted the seed in her head to build the weapon. Every now and then Vi could see Jinx trying to peak through, trying to take over Powder. Maybe one day Jinx would finally go away. Maybe she would always be a part of her, whispering in her ear to turn on those she loved. Either way Vi was keeping her close, not wanting to make the same mistake twice. She promised Powder it would be them again, but with just one new addition.

Now Vi, Powder, and Caitlyn were on the boat to Stillwater. Powder had been asking a million different questions about you. There was part of her, the Jinx part, that resented you. Like you took her sister away from her despite the pair of you meeting when Vi had already been in Stillwater for some time. But mostly she was just excited to see whoever made her sister this happy. The instant the boat was docked Vi ran off, clutching the release papers in her right hand. Caitlyn and Powder were right behind her, albeit a bit slower.

Vi slammed the papers down on the warden's desk with a smirk as soon as she made it up to his desk. "Orders from Councilor Talis to release prisoner 381. Immediately." She stated. The warden wasn't exactly pleased with the orders, but begrudgingly agreed. Mostly since he now had no choice with new orders. That and it would be three against one, and Vi had already put up a fight in the past when it was just her. The one with the blue hair also looked unstable, so best not to mess with that.

Confusion overwhelmed you as the doors to your cell opened. The first thought you had was that this was a trap. A guard opened the doors and was waiting for you to try and escape. That's the only thing it could be. At least until you saw pink hair peaking out from around the corner of your wall. "VI!" you yelled, your feet carrying you forward and before you even realized there was a familiar pair of strong arms around you. "I've got you bun, I've got you" she whispered as she pulled you close, hiding her face in your hair. For a while neither of you said a word, falling into a comfortable silence. At some point tears had began falling down your cheeks, you weren't too sure when. Only this time they weren't sad tears. They were tears of relief and happiness. Eventually you broke the silence. "You came back after all."

Those words hit Vi hard. You really didn't think she would keep her word? Though she couldn't find it in herself to blame you for that. After all, she did just up and leave without running you through what was happening. There just wasn't time in the moment. "Of course I did. I promised I'd come back and get you. I'd never lie to you." she whispered, her grip tightening. "I'm back and we're leaving this place for good. We'll never see Stillwater again."

When you finally pulled away you realized that you weren't alone. There was the enforcer from earlier, Catilyn, and..someone with blue hair? "Who is that?" "That's my little sister, Powder. You remember me talking about her right?" you did, Vi talked about her a lot. Though clearly she wasn't eleven anymore. "I do. You found her?" you asked, giving a small smile and wave towards Powder. She returned the gesture, moving to hold her elbows. "Yeah, that was a few years ago" Powder responded rocking slightly on her heels. "Vi told me a lot about you on the boat ride over. I have a lot to catch you up on." "We both do." Vi added on.

Caitlyn cleared her throat to gain everyone's attention before turning to you. "I wanted to apologize for taking Vi away from you. She had important information about something stolen from Piltover. I did try to get you both out, but-" "Caitlyn, right? As long as you didn't kiss Violet I'll say it's fine." that made her laugh a little, shaking her head. "I promise you I didn't. I wanted to say that both of you no longer have a criminal record, it has been wiped clean. And I wanted to give you this," Catilyn handed over a large pouch filled with money. You carefully took it, examining the pouch. It was a considerable sum, likely enough to rent an apartment in Piltover for a few months.

"Please take that as part of my apology. It should help the three of you find a good place to stay and keep food on the table. Whether you want to go back to the Undercity or move on to Piltover." "Thank you." You handed the pouch over to Vi who tucked the pouch into one of the pockets on her jacket. "Come on bun, we're going to find a place for the three of us. No one," she looked between you and Powder "is getting left behind ever again. Come on" she grabbed your hand and Powder's, walking towards the elevator. You followed along, pulling your hand away at the last second.

"Vi?" "Yes?" Vi responded, nervous for what may come next. "I love you." You said, pulling her in for a short, sweet kiss. Vi was quick to return it, pulling you onto the elevator where Powder was waiting.

"I love you too. Now let's go home"

#arcane #vi arcane #vi x fem reader #fem reader

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