#and honestly who can blame literal Death for having troubles when it comes to knowing what a human child would need
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Working on that Rio adopts little Skye AU and idk if I'll ever post it but I do love that their relationship is just
Skye: *jumps full-speed at Rio*
Rio: Wait fuck no-
Rio: *drops pizza boxes to catch Skye*
#rio vidal#daisy johnson#agatha all along#aos#she's TRYING ok#she kinda sucks at it but she's got the spirit#and honestly who can blame literal Death for having troubles when it comes to knowing what a human child would need
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Strange question, do you prefer when Star Guardians was more Sailor Moon or Madoka Magica? Or do you like both?
Oddly enough i prefer Sailor Moon.
Reason is that Riot keeps releasing skins (wich is not... bad, entirely) and those skins now need a plot/story. Point is that back when Lux team was the only one the skinline had, it was very Sailor Moon styled. They fight the baron, void creatures, they have silly school drama, lesbians, that's literally pretty much Sailor Moon. And it was great. Back on the day it was suggested that Janna, as she is the one that has been an star guardian for the longest time, has some secrets. Thats fine.
Then Ahri's team appeared, and it wasnt bad, either, but they started introducing a story that was more than just haha sparkles! And honestly, it was interesting! Problem is that, you back then realize 'Oh, no, this skinline is going to crash down in hell' cause now we have 3 mysterious star guardians that are dead/fallen/etc. Now Syndra exists, and its stated that she has dark secrets. Sarah is a lesbian (periodt and it has literally nothing to add to my point but regardless) and she has like conflict with Ahri so thats more school drama. This is kinda like when the Outer Senshi started to appear in Sailor Moon and they got added to the original team in a lot of the episodes? well.
Then Neeko, Zoe and Xayah/Rakan released. And oh man things were so good but everything started to crash eventually. Now we have the concept that star guardians can be corrupted! By desesperation/death/whatever. Do you guys remember when Janna said she had secrets? At this point in the lore, who the fuck cares about Janna??????? Who cares about the Lux team? What do they do? Do they just rescue kitties from trees while Ahri shows up like 'ok i can handle the sassy kid and my corrupted best friends with my chameleon bestie'.
Okay, the Kai'sa gang is what killed me and made me loose the focus on the story. I have opinions, and that is that i just think community has done a lot to make star guardian entretaining because i didnt understand half of the story on the event. Lux is dead or smth cause she has an statue, and i readed that and i just said 'Whatever' cause Lux dying is so meaningless to the plot. We literally know nothing about her in recent years, there's literally nothing to say 'omg i cant believe this happened'. They just say well Lux is dead. Well what about Jinx?? Lulu?? Poppy?? Janna??????? I hate Ezreal with my guts but that dude isnt like affected??? Where IS the people?!??! Completely understand that they added A LOT of characters to the story line but come on you cant just said 'oops she died, anyway here's Kaisa talking to a stone LOL'. I didnt get the villains and the corruption. The Harp being Fiddlesticks was like woah! Thats cool. Why is Zoe just Zoe but purple then? Why is Morgana purple then? Why are they sassy?????? I mean okay there are great villains that are sassy. these arent.
Okay i dont want to rip the lore apart. Thats what sentinels of light are for. they are my punching bag and i dont regret it. This is just what happens when you're a capitalist and you try to keep people interested but you keep stepping over your own story and messing it up just for the sake of adding more characters. If this was just Sailor Moon then we could have as many skins as we wanted without trouble and sassy villains! But i get the story keeps people interested, i cant blame aanyone and im happy they like it! I love what community has done for Star Guardian cause it what keeps my interest rather than the canon, keep writing keep creating cause im watching.
good thing Everything Goes On was released cause i wasnt understanding half of the story and put it to sleep but i went heheee this song is soooooo coooool.
#thank you porter robinson *thumbs up*#anyway#i respect everyones opinion sorry if i get mean#its not the intention#i only get mean with riot#not anyone on my tumbly#there were things i liked in the last kaisa team but i started loosing the thread and ended up just skipping#and then watching video resumes#anyway take a shot everytime star guardian lore pulls a deux ex machina
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“If clarity’s in death, then why won’t this die?”
I honestly tend to interpret her words in the bridge differently, as if they’re little thoughts about a person’s struggles with self harm. Someone who’s trying to recover but keeps relapsing, maybe. The clarity comes when the habit dies — except this habit won’t die.
“God rest my soul,
I miss who I used to be.”
I don’t necessarily miss who I was before I started cutting ‘cause that 17 year old was pretty miserable, so I can’t really blame her for how she reacted, but I miss the person who didn’t know what self harm was. The little girl that still allowed herself to feel sad in front of others. The kid who still tried asking for help whether they got it or not. The one that still asked for comfort when they felt like crying. I miss that.
“The tomb won’t close,
Stained glass windows in my mind.”
The tomb just won’t close. I think of the tomb as the lockbox I keep my blades in, because it won’t stay closed in the sense that 𝘐 keep opening it. 🎶It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.🎶 But seriously. I keep bloody paper towels in there too, and they cross my mind along with the urges, because I cut for blood and not pain. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 are the stained glass windows in my mind. Might as well be burned into my retinas…
“I regret you all the time.”
Not a person you may have dated, and certainly not John fucking Mayer — but the habit turned addiction you got into. I don’t tend to regret it very much, because there have been times where it helped, but I still cover my arm or legs at times even around people I’ve told. The only person I don’t do that in front of the most is my therapist.
“I can’t let this go,
I fight with you in my sleep.”
I seriously can’t let this habit go. I have a lot of trouble being okay with doing that. I’ve made a few cuts just because I felt like I needed to stay an ‘active’ cutter for my problems to have meaning. I’ve recently had dreams of harming myself, and I feel really weird about that. I can’t really remember how they went but I don’t think I can forget the fact that they involved me and a couple of razors, if you know what I mean. I’m literally fighting self harm in my sleep now. I can’t even trust sleep to take my problems away, goddamn.
“The wound won’t close.”
Whatever is causing you pain, or your literal wound not healing. I Interpret it as the pain never truly going away. Sometimes it’s easier to be okay and other times it’s impossible.
“I keep on waiting for a sign.”
A sign that someone cares. I showed my mom my problem not long after it started, and we never had a real conversation about it. She asked if I was trying to kill myself and that was that. Went to meet my dad for dinner. Found a therapist a few months later when I didn’t stop. I told some friends after almost a year of trying to hide it — though I don’t know how well I managed that — and they said some nice things and offered support, but I still have problems with isolating myself socially and not leaving the house, so I never reached out to anyone. I don’t hear from them outside of derby if I don’t text first, but if I do, it’s rare. I feel like I have nothing or no one when I leave races, because I spend the whole time mostly keeping to myself. I’m homeschooled, so I grew up already a little isolated. Seems like I accepted that and made it my life. It’s like I just don’t have the energy to do more than self destruct, and somehow I’m still exhausted.
God rest my soul
I miss who I used to be
The tomb won't close
Stained glass windows in my mind
I regret you all the time
I can't let this go
I fight with you in my sleep
The wound won't close
I keep on waiting for a sign
I regret you all the time
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Jimmy is an egotistical, delusional, and narcissistic person who wasn't capable to be a leader and a manipulative person as well. He r-word anya, literally make Curly not being able to do anything and literally the reason why Daisuke and Swansea died
Sunny is a child, he pushed Mari out of stress and fear, he suffered a lot due to the traumatic incident he had to witness plus the grief and guilty due to the consequences of his actions
Honestly, I am baffled as to how you think this two characters are the same, you probably need to seek a brain specialist and check your neurons, I'm sure God gave you a wrong patterns recognition. And hey maybe you can test your IQ in there and have some advice to get smarter.
Also, a friend of mine decided to come up with rebuttal
First of all, his murder of his sister was not an impulsive decision. The game doesn't indicate that Mari physically restrained him to stop him from running away. This means that instead of reacting like a realistic 12 yo child and running away to someplace safer - either his bedroom or the bathroom, which both were on the same floor they were having their argument on - Sunny consciously employed physical force.
Yes, but as we are both entitled to using non canon materials (the album captions are considered non-canon), I shall use mine:
youtube
This video: timestamp 0:35 Mari screams “Where do you think you’re going?”
Anyone with reasonable deductive skills can see what she means by this. The timeline was as follows:
Pre 0:35: Sunny attempts to get away. There would be no reason for him to pull his sister as he’s getting away, so there’s no contact, 0:35: Mari screams “Where do you think you’re going”, 0:37: Mari falls down the stairs.
Now in those 2 seconds, who is more likely to make first contact? The angry one or the one getting away.
Bingo.
Mari grabbed Sunny, closing the distance between them, and Sunny having a flight or fight response (normal for a human being, by the way) and shoving her off him, thus down the stairs.
Voila.
consistent pattern of being an ass.
Let me address each argument for you.
(Apparently) was aware of Aubrey's troubled situation at home, wasn't shown doing anything of note to help and/or support her
What can a ten to twelve year old do other than talk to their friend and make sure they’re okay? (Which Sunny did do a lot with Aubrey by the way, shown through the video montage of “Duet”).
Whined about having to help his friends build their treehouse
What twelve year old wouldn’t complain MENTALLY? It’s not being an ass, if he was, he would’ve outwardly said all those things. It’s just that mentally he doesn’t want to do it. But he does because he knows it's only fair to the others. That’s called respecting other people and compromising for them.
Threw a tantrum that resulted in the death of his sister because he couldn't watch cartoons for as long as he'd have liked
Once again, I am allowed to point at non canon as you have.
0:04: Sunny says “Gosh, you-”
0:05-0:014: Unintelligible
0:15: The violin crashes
Firstly, no one screams “Gosh, you-” without the other having not done anything.
Secondly: Do you really think Mari stayed silent for those 9 seconds of unintelligible noise?
Was throwing the violin down the stairs the best option? No. Do I think it was just caused because he didn’t get to watch cartoons? No. Mari obviously said something to provoke it.
Blamed Mari for the argument as if she forced him to practice even though he himself begged her to let him join her
Something tells me you don’t have younger siblings tbh. It’s very normal for kids to want something at first, but change their minds later after they realise the work that has to be put in. (E.g: Wanting to go to school when they’re younger but hating it as soon as they start) Also, you’re disregarding Sunny’s motive: He never wanted to do violin because he loved the violin. He just wanted to spend more time with Mari.
Also to address “ as if she forced him to practice “
You think a 15 year old whose parents booked a venue for their recital wouldn’t be pressured and in turn pressure their younger sibling into making it PERFECT? Just food for thought.
Chose to resolve his argument with Mari by violence even though he had the option to run away instead
Already addressed this :)
Was relieved that he got away with accidentally killing his sister
For someone who has a brain and must scream, it sure seems otherwise. Do read what it says. “For a moment, you feel at peace. You hate yourself for feeling this way.” He was relieved, sure. But he hated himself for that. Because he didn’t want to feel relief.
Chose to lie to his friends by omission and let them believe they had somehow failed Mari due of the assumed nature of her death as a suicide, irreversibly scarring them
Chose to let Basil take the fall for blacking out Mari's photos in the photo album, which entailed Basil becoming the target of Aubrey's bullying and wore Basil's mental health down to near-psychosis by the time of the game's events*
Half of the game is just showing the consequences to Sunny doing that though. It's portrayed as a bad thing. It’s also realistic to those experiencing PTSD or shock. I don’t want to make this too long (it’s already 800 ish words) so just read it here https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-2035596
Walked out on Basil - his best friend - when the latter had a mental breakdown despite Basil begging him to stay
Considered leaving Basil to his death as a legitimate option, twice
Seems to have been content with thinking of doing nice things for Basil (e.g. watering Basil's plants in his dream world) as opposed to actually trying to support him in the real world
Walked out on Hero after seeing him crying over the piano
Again, just read up on the link I sent earlier. Specifically avoidance. It’s not morally correct but that doesn’t mean it’s in his control either.
Wasn't shown to feel any guilt or shame from having a picnic with the people he lied to near his dead sister's grave
I don’t know if you’ve played the game, but you like to bring up “Sunny and the player aren’t separate” so… Have you ever thought that maybe, just maybe the reason Sunny doesn’t show any guilt in-game is because he’s discovering the truth as much as we, the player are? Just food for thought
Twisted the supportive words of the people he lied to to alleviate his own self-loathing over committing manslaughter
This is just a wrong interpretation entirely lmfao. The battle against OMORI isn’t a battle against self loathing. It’s a battle against the denial that kept him from telling the truth to begin with. Sunny doesn’t kill himself in the bad ending because he hates himself. He kills himself in the bad ending because he wants to hide the truth and knows he can’t do it for much longer. Why do you think he doesn’t end up killing himself in a majority of the hikikomori routes even though OMORI has taken over?
Told his friends the truth shortly before having to move town, thus avoiding the direct consequences of his confession and leaving Basil behind again to face them alone
Not exactly his choice as I’ve said earlier.
Is only concerned with how his friends' pain affects himself at the end of the day
Can’t say much about it (I’m a little stupid and can’t be bothered to spend over an hour doing this) other than I wanna see an analysis of My Time next. Sure it's not made for the game, but it was chosen for a reason.
What Sunny did was the fault of an irrational mindset
What Sunny did was the fault of him being a child witnessing a traumatic incident being led by another child who witnessed the same incident and then the rest are just the effects of PTSD. A majority of the reason the incident took place the way it did can be explained by: Sunny’s in worse shock than Basil due to him having to process that he was the one who killed his sister, and Basil just wants to protect him. If anything, Basil's at fault.
”Lol I just got off the hook”
Lol I explained this already. You used the same point twice.
Sunny is forgivable because he was a child who was not in a good rational mindset and made an impulsive decision with much more dire consequences than anticipated
Jimmy is not forgivable because he was an adult who had to make several conscious decisions to do what he did and does nothing but repeat his horrible behaviour
Both games are about forgiveness but two completely different ends of that spectrum. Omori is about how forgiveness can be healing and help those recover, and mouthwashing is about how sometimes forgiveness does nothing but enable horrible people to continue their abusive behaviour
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Let me help you
Pairing: Alpha! Toru Oikawa x Omega! Reader, Alpha! Hajime Iwaizumi x Omega! Reader
Genre: Angst, fluff, Hurt/comfort.
Request: Because I like a bit of hurt/comfort, and I love the idea of an omega depression, I'm curious on how alpha third years on Aoba Johsai (so like Oikawa, Iwaizumi, Mattsun) would do in response to their omega being in an omega depression.
Summary: Because of unseen circumstances, you drop, and you drop hard. How does your alpha help you/redeem himself?
Author’s Note: Oikawa’s got really long, so I didn’t include Mattsun or Makki. If you wanna request a part 2 I’ll get on it right away!
Requests: Open!
Toru Oikawa
➵ Truth be told, it was kind of his fault.
➵Right after you both bonded, he immediately seemed to drop any redeeming qualities he had while courting you.
➵He skipped out on dates, stayed later and later at practice, gave the mile to his fangirls.
➵And while you could get over that, the worse thing you realized was when you went to cheer him on at one of his games.
➵His bond mark was covered with a scent gland bandage and when Iwaizumi noticed it (He knew of your bonding), he sent a worried glance your way.
➵He could practically see the heartbreak from his place on the court.
➵What was worse was that you didn’t make a scene.
➵You stood, turned and left. That was it.
➵ Oikawa was busy doing his pre-game whatever to notice, making the situation even worse.
➵Iwaizumi wanted to follow you but the whistle of the ref called him back.
➵ You didn’t want Iwaizumi to follow you anyway.
➵You felt numb. So, so numb.
➵Like anything you previously felt-- any longing, or wishing for your alpha-- reduced to a numb buzz that kept your body moving.
➵You felt like you were on Autopilot.
➵Toru made it fairly obvious that he wanted your bond mark on display, so why weren’t the same standards held to him? It wasn’t against the rules of volleyball-- several alphas had theirs out on proud display with their omega cheering in the stands.
➵Was it you?
➵God, you felt so empty. Like your will to live was dripping away.
➵You felt your omega lay down, whining as they tried to figure out what was wrong. Where did you go wrong?
➵You barely felt the soft fleece of your blankets as you settled into your nest for who knows how long.
___
Toru was lost. You were in the stands during warm-up last game, but was gone by half-time. Okay, fine. Maybe you had to pee. But then you didn’t show up at all after that. While at the time it took a back burner-- because we all know how Oikawa plays-- it was now front and center. His alpha was on edge and snapped on him twice already, sending sharp throbs of pain to his temples. It had been three days since Toru had seen you, his mate, so Toru could tell that was a big reason for his frustration. But Toru didn’t know why you had been gone for three days.
If you were sick, why didn’t you text him? Were you injured? Toru didn’t know. His neck burnt with anticipation at the thought of you in any peril.
Where were you?
Shoving his way past a few fangirls, Toru made his way into the gym, racking his brain for any sort of hint. Vacation maybe and you just forgot to tell him?
“Iwa-chan! I need your-” Toru paused, huffing when Iwaizumi roughly shoved past him. His alpha was on guard immediately, making Toru growl loudly. “What’s you issue, Iwa? Blue-balled or something?”
The laugh that left Iwaizumi made even him, the head alpha, shiver. “My issue? What’s yours?! You absolutely destroyed your relationship last game and ask me for help?! What the hell is wrong with you, Oikawa?!”
Oikawa swallowed. There was no nickname. No sense of friendship in his words. They were straight malice, laced with acidic venom meant to hurt him.
When Oikawa didn’t immediately answer, Iwaizumi continued. “You make them wear their bond mark for all the world to see, but cover yours up? What in the actual fuck is wrong with you?! How in the hell you got someone like them to glance your way for more than a second is beyond me, let alone bond you; but when you do, you fucking destroy them. You’re a failure of an alpha, Toru Oikawa.”
Truth be told, Oikawa thought that him covering up his bond mark would save you from trouble. The less people who knew about him being mated the less people to harass you. But he was your alpha. He was supposed to make sure that didn’t happen anyway. Fuck, Iwa was right. He was a failure. This became evident as more and more things came hurdling back at him. He didn’t even grab his duffel before he was, quite literally, sprinting out of the gym. He didn’t care who he pushed over. He didn’t care who he snapped at. He didn’t care. He only care about one person and one person alone.
___
You whined as hunger continued gnawing at your gut. You wanted to eat, really, but you just didn’t have the energy. You didn’t have the will.
You still felt so numb and didn’t know where to go from here. At this point, it was clear you were in the midst of an Omega Depression, and to be fair-- that scared you. You wanted to spend the evening in your nest, restart and reboot, before talking to your alpha about it the next day. You truly didn’t mean to drop.
But here you were. The aspect of ...starvation scared you. The aspect of no closure for yourself scared you. Death scared you. But you couldn’t fight yourself to fix it. Couldn’t bring yourself to even lift your head or stay awake for more than an hour.
The door to your room slammed open, but you didn’t look up. It was probably your guardian coming in to try and get you to eat again. But you wouldn’t.
Your heart dropped when the smell of burnt plastic invaded your sense.
“No- no, no, no, no no- Please god no-” Oikawa felt his heart shatter at the sight of you. You looked like you had both feet dangling in the grave, hanging on by a loose root you grabbed onto in a last ditch effort.
He continued repeating no while running his hands through his hair, already crying before he even set foot in your room. When he did dare step closer, that was all it took before he was running to you, pulling you in close despite your whines of protest. His grip on you was bruising, but he couldn’t risk letting you slip. Not again.
“Please- please don’t leave me.” He sobbed into your shoulder, your own eyes stinging (Dehydration keeping tears from falling). “I- I can fix this- I can fix us. Fuck- Please Y/N. Please omega, let me help you. Let me make this right!”
Though you didn’t say anything, the grip on his jacket told him all he needed to know. And though it would be a long road to recovery, you and him would conquer it.
➵ Completely contrary to Oikawa, your drop wasn’t anyone’s fault.
➵Maybe the school systems, if there was blame to be put.
➵So much had gone on in such a short period.
➵You and your alpha, along with his team, had been bombarded with practice and paperwork in preparation for the upcoming tournament.
➵But just because volleyball picked, doesn’t mean school drops off.
➵ You had essay after essay due, Unit exams which would soon fall into Final exams.
➵You and Hajime had barely even seen each other all week.
➵You both still sent each other good morning and good night texts, and if you see each other in the hallway you’ll give each other a quick peck.
➵Honestly, it was obvious everyone was on edge.
➵Teachers didn’t care though, they just kept piling on more, and more, and more work.
➵ And volleyball just kept getting closer and closer.
➵You stumbled into the gym with a chirp, trying to sort through the multitude of papers in your arms.
➵Your back was aching and your arms were strained, but you couldn’t drop them. That would be a disaster.
➵ The coach sent you a raised brow, offering a hand to help. You waved him off, sitting on the bench with a grunt.
➵Everyone was already sweaty and panting, practice in full swing.
➵God, everyone looked so tired already.
➵You could feel the waves of exhaustion.
➵ As they were just in deep in your bones as they were in theirs.
___
“Did you finish filling out the registry forms?”
You looked up to the coach, nodding slowly before riffling through your papers and pulling out the ones you were looking for. You handed them to the beta, quickly going back to your notes once more.
You noted the stumbled steps and slowed reflexes, but simply made it a point to emphasize rest with the boys. Maybe a day with no practice would do them more good then practice.
Hajime was doing well, as usual, somehow keeping his head and energy high. You know he hasn’t gotten much rest either, and you felt for your alpha. Honestly, you just wanted one day with just you and your alpha, where you both could sleep the day away and come back good as new.
That just sounded glorious.
“You wouldn’t mind filling out the ref sheets either, would you?” The beta smirked, already handing you the sheets. He knew you had a tough time saying no to people older and/or bigger than you; and had you doing several things that most mangers would never touch.
It was tiring.
You reluctantly took the sheets, already starting on them. The notes you were working on were yanking from under you, the coach reading over them.
He scoffed at your note of possibly skipping a practice. “Are you serious?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Take a break?! These boys are on the brink of a skillful breakthrough, and you want to stop them?!”
You closed in on yourself at the yells, trying to focus on the ref sheets. He continued yelling and berating you for the notes you made. You could feel the teams stares on you, but you also knew they wanted you to learn to stand up for yourself. They had been giving you a few minutes to try and collect yourself and if nothing happened they would step in.
It only took seconds for you to finally break down, sobbing into your hands as the coach’s yelling reached a breaking point. The team took very time to act then and there.
Oikawa and Kyoutani were snapping and growling, pushing him back and away from you while Hajime slid onto his knees in front of you, pulling you to his chest and kissing your bond mark. He rocked you side to side, purring and letting you cry.
You sobbed and sobbed while the coach tried backtracking, but it was too late. The pack was on defense. One of them was in danger and they were going to make sure they all were safe.
___
You don’t remember falling asleep, but when you wake up, your in Hajime’s arms, which are wrapped tight around your waist.
Oikawa was on the other side of you, head on Hajime’s thigh, Makki and Mattsun were cuddling together a little to the left of you. Kyoutani was closest to you (He had a soft spot for you, almost like you were another older sister to him). You ran a hand through his hair for a moment before taking a deep breath in and out. The rest of the team was scattered in the puppy pile around you, and the gym was dark.
In fact, everything was dark. There were chairs propped up by the door, just in case you supposed, and there were jackets littered everywhere. Your heart fluttered at the thought.
Hajime’s arms subconsciously tightened around you, luring you back into sleep.
You, your alpha, and your pack.
#a/b/o#alpha/beta/omega#alpha/beta/omega verse#alpha/beta/omega AU#A/B/O verse#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu omegaverse#alpha oikawa#alpha oikawa x reader#oikawa x reader#oikawa x you#alpha toru oikawa x omega reader#alpha iwaizumi#alpha iwaizumi x reader#alpha Hajime Iwaizumi#Alpha hajime iwaizumi x omega reader#Iwaizumi#hajime iwaizumi#hajime iwaizumi x reader
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Oooo I too am simping for scara hhnngngbg
I just had a dream that he was crushing on me and super overprotective during missions and stuff. I can’t take him and his jorts or mullet thing hair (?) seriously like wut. So idk if that would count as a request but uh it would be funny to know his reaction to seeing someone disrespect his crush and him go full psycho lol fbgbfnfp even tho he isn’t that threatening to me haha (Mihoyo pls release him) - 🎀 anon
Protecting you [Genshin Impact]
[Scaramouche x Gender Neutral! Reader]
Notes: ASKNGI— I WANT TO HAVE THAT KIND OF DREAM AS WELL- 😭😭 BUT I DONT REMEMBER MY DREAMS- IF I REMEMBER THEM, THEIR USUALLY NIGHTMARES— SHHS- but can we appreciate how adorable this is-? 🤧 (besides the psycho part—). Hope ya’ll like this!
Word Count: 1235
Warning: mentions of disrespecting and jealous, overprotective Scara-
Scaramouche knew something was wrong, he has this strange feeling in his gut that something would happen. But, like usual, Scaramouche ignores it. But currently, he’s starting to regret not trusting his gut instinct.
He watches with narrowed eyes as a member of the Fatui approached you with a wicked smile on his face. His electric blue eyes watch as the guy stopped just behind you, you were unaware of the guy’s presence, busy talking with a fellow Harbinger, Childe.
Scaramouche’s black orbs turn into slits when he noticed the guy’s hand moving. What the guy did next made Scaramouche furious and you surprised, and Childe disgusted. The echo of the slap echoed through the room, effectively silencing everyone. You yelped while turning around with a red face and a glare.
“What the-?! Why did you do that?!” You screamed at him angrily, how dare him slap your butt like that?! The guy, who literally has no shame or regret in his face, only laughed at your reaction. “I just wanted to see how hard your butt is. Now that I know.. why don’t you come with me? I’ll show you a good time.”
You made a disgusted face as you took a step back. “Hell no! What? Were you thinking I’ll join you after that stunt?! As if!” The guy’s smile turned into a sneer. “As if you have a choice in the matter. You’re nothing but a lower member of the Fatui. I honestly don’t even know why you’re still here.” “Hey. I think that’s going a bit too far-“ Childe tried to intervene but immediately shut his mouth when he noticed a very familiar presence approaching you three.
Not wanting to be in the way, he decided to leave this to his fellow Harbinger. Even though he’s nothing but a douchebag to Childe and the others, everyone can tell that Scaramouche has a soft spot for you. It isn’t really hard to tell. Childe took the spot beside a Fatui member and lean on the wall behind him and watch as the scene unfold. Ready to intervene if needed.
You stared at the guy in disbelief, you didn’t have anything to say to him. He was completely right. You were nothing but another member of the Fatui, one ready to be sacrificed if needed for the Tsaritsa. You can feel everyone’s eyes were on you two, which further adds to your humiliation and embarrassment. But you still have your pride and dignity left, even though its little. You opened your mouth to make a comeback when-
“Shouldn’t you have better things to do instead of bothering someone because you’re horny?” You blink, surprised to hear his voice. You turn your head to the side to look at the person who spoke. There stood, in his fullest glory (and his humongous circle hat-), Scaramouche, with a scary look on his face. His eyes bright with purple, slightly darkened by his bangs and electricity being sparked around him. He really looks furious.
You can tell that the guy was frightened at the sudden appearance of one of the high ranking Harbinger. Him gulping before speaking up once again, not a good idea really. “T-Tsk. Who ask for your opinion, Balladeer?” The intense gaze that Scaramouche is giving to him never falter, the electricity around him is sparking more though.. “Oh? You wish to stand against one of the Harbinger?” Scaramouche laughed, dryly if I may add.
The guy was really nervous now, you can tell. You can’t blame the guy really, you would also be nervous if the electricity is almost hitting you- “You wouldn’t stand a chance.” Scaramouche sneered before letting out a bolt of electricity to the guy. The guy swiftly tried to dodge but Scaramouche’s electricity was faster. The guy drop to the ground, shaking violently. Many gasps can be heard as the guy continued to shake on the ground.
“Let this be a lesson to you if you ever want to disrespect [Y/N] again. This is also for all of you.” Scaramouche’s gaze switch to the people in the room, whom flinch at the intensity of his glare. “If you ever disrespect or bully [Y/N], I promise you that your death would be a slow and painful one.” As he finished that, he lifts his finger and snaps it. The guy stopped shaking, but he was breathing heavily. Scaramouche returned his attention to him once more. “Do you understand now?”
The guy hastily nodded before standing up, stumbling slightly while doing so. You honestly pity the guy now, but what he did to you was unforgiveable. So you suppose you wouldn’t scold Scaramouche for this.. “Y-Yes sir! S-Sorry for doing that-!” “Sorry? Is that all you gonna say-?” “Scara.. that’s enough.” You said softly while placing a hand on his shoulder. His blue, still glowing purple, eyes look at you in the corner. “‘Enough’? What he did is unforgiveable-!” “I know. That’s why that’s enough.” You said firmly.
Scaramouche stared at you before sighing, the electricity around him died down, making the purple hue around him vanish. When he reopen his eyes, it returned to its original color blue. “Be glad that they convince me that you should live. If they weren’t here, you would be dead on where you’re standing.” The guy slightly whimpered, he looks so pathetic right now, it makes you feel sorry for him. “Scram. I don’t want you appearing before me, or [Y/N], ever again. If I see you.. well, I can leave that to your imagination.”
The guy didn’t need another warning as he ran off immediately after Scaramouche finished speaking. “Pathetic.” Scaramouche sneered in a whisper while shaking his head before turning to you completely. You flinch a bit but you stood your ground, staring back at his intense eyes. “You know, you always bring trouble wherever you go. Do you know how much of it is a hassle for me to clean up right after?” “I didn’t ask for help.” You grumbled while looking away. “You were the one who interfered. I could’ve handled that-“
“Yes, and you handling things would only make it worse.” Scaramouche said, effectively cutting you off. You grumbled under your breath. “Atleast I’m not the one who’s most hated here.” He glared at you, before sighing. “C’mon, let’s get you something to eat. I’m sure you’re starving now.” He said as he started to walk towards the exit of the Fatui headquarters. “How come he knows me so well?” You mumbled under your breath before following him.
“I want some seafood-!” “Hm.. sure. If we find a restaurant that sells seafood that is.” “Psh. We’ll find one!” “Whatever you say.”
——
“How come [Y/N] gets special treatment from Scaramouche?” One of the member of the Fatui complained while shoving a spoonful of rice in her mouth. The other two members shrugged. “Maybe because he likes them?” One said. “Yeah! Have you seen how soft he is around them?! Like, that’s not the Scaramouche we all know and hated-“
“I’d advise you to not talk about Scaramouche or [Y/N] out loud.” The trio snapped their heads towards the 11th Harbinger, Childe, who only smirk. “Unless you want to get punish that is.” He laughed when he saw how pale the trio got. “Just a word of advice from a fellow Harbinger~ Happy eating-!”
[x] Main Page || [x] Fatui Harbingers Page
#i got carried away-#👁👄👁#I REALLY LIKE THIS THO-#🤧🤧#IM PROUD OF THIS#I DONT CARE IF U GUYS DONT LIKE THIS MUCH-#THIS IS ONE OF MY BEST WORK- 😭😭#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#scaramouche#scaramouche x reader#genshin impact scaramouche#genshin impact scaramouche x reader#req ans❣️#🎀 anon.txt
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grace BLAMES HERSELF for what happened. steph tells grace all of her plans have been disasters she doesnt know what she's doing and she ruined their lives because of it and the first thing grace says is i know !!! and the first thing she does is break down. its one of if not THE only time we see her actually own up to and try to take responsibility for her actions. ever other time something goes wrong she blames anyone BUT herself. it's always someone else's fault, to the point of blaming even god for what happened.
but she knows. she knows it was her fault. and it wasn't, it was a horrific accident, but she's the one who came up with the plan and who let them all into the waylon place, which means it's her fault max died and it's her fault max came back and it's her fault richie and ruth are dead.
grace, until the beginning of the musical, has always followed the rules. she follows and nothing ever goes wrong and she never gets in trouble (beyond making her classmates hate her) because she's always done what she's supposed to do. she behaves for her parents and she listens to everything they tell her about christianity and god even when it, in her opinion, goes against all common sense because she listens. she's a good girl, for her parents and for god.
she's never HAD to own up to herself. she's never HAD to take the blame for things. and the fact that her very first instinct when something does go wrong is to hide and lie and cover things up, paired with the way her parents are in general, makes me believe that as a child she wasn't really taught WHY things were bad or WHY she had to behave. she was likely taught or punished in such a way that she lying about it was always better than honestly owning up to mistakes.
and now the first time she breaks the rules, the first time she leads instead of following, someone dies. dies, and comes back as a fucking ghost, and kills more people. because of her. something so horrible that it HAS to have been god's plan, because if it wasn't, why did it happen? how could something so horrible have happened if it wasn't an act of god?
but no matter how much she tries to shove the blame onto max or the others or even god, she knows it was her fault. she knows, and she ALMOST manages to face it before things get even Worse.
and then there are the lords in black and steph and pete nearly dying and max is right there and her chastity is her single most important thing. she's already lost SO MUCH of her sense of self, already broken so many rules, already asked herself who she is without everything she's always been defined by. she has so little left. but steph and pete and everyone will die.
i don't think it matters whether she genuinely wanted or enjoyed it or not. maybe she did, maybe she didn't, but she made the choice under threat of death, whether it'd be her own or theirs or the countless others max would hunt down after them. and her chastity WAS her single most cherished thing. it wouldn't have worked if not. there was literally nothing she held closer or protected more than her own chastity.
gone, just like that.
she can't tell her parents the truth. pete and steph are FAR closer with each other than with her, who's to say that they even like her? her rules are broken everything she defined herself by is shattered her chastity is gone. she's an awful person who's done awful things shes lied and fucked and killed shes gone against everything shes ever believed in.
except that grace's first instinct is still to blame others before herself. max was the reason she lost control in the first place. max was the reason all of this happened at all. max was the bully and the killer and the reason she lost her chastity and everything.
it was max, but it wasn't JUST max. there are max's everywhere in the world. dirty, perverted men who prey on girls like her and force them to give up everything.
a girl who has never been in control of her own life possessing a tome of spells that can give her power. a girl who is TERRIFIED of the lords in black and what they're capable of having a way to directly please them, to get in their good graces. a girl who defined herself by her faith for so long and is desperate to rebuild the pieces in any way she can, to take back those ideas she believed in so firmly.
maybe in some awful, twisted way, this really WAS god's plan. max was a perv and he's rotting in hell for it. he's in worse than hell for it, now. pervs are the reason this happened and grace has the power to punish them. to fulfill god's plan at the same time that she pleases the lords in black.
"i'll never ever tell you to behave" "i am expecting you to behave" "if i finally break the rules i will know my worth, im the ruler" "darkness will spare my soul" she has power she's in control she can finally do something she can do good she can get revenge she can save the world she can atone. she can fix it. she can always fix it.
would you guys forgive me if i became one of those ppl who had to try and bend over backwards rationalizing their fave's behavior to make it make sense beyond malice even though its clearly probably just malice...... be honest.........................
#npmd#grace chasity#<- praying that my blog will actually Let Me See The Post When I Search For It if i do that#anyways ummmmmmmmmmmm#i dont think grace was malicious at the end#i think she was fucking terrified and she'd lost everything that ever defined her and she had NOTHING left#and she needed a reason for it to have happened because she literally just could not deal with or understand it otherwise#and what shes doing is fucking HORRIFIC especially considering she's the one defining who the pervs are#jason kissed her BECAUSE SHE ASKED and she killed him for it like.#ohhhhhhhhhh to have nothing of yourself left and become drunk on power the first time you ever truly have it#to go from being shaped molded controlled by your parents and your faith to being 'free' because the rules are broken to have 'power'#and to be terrified out of your mind of the beings granting you that power capable of granting you a fate worse than death at any moment#puppet strings not severed but passed from one hand to another#god. somethign SO wrong with me
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Phic Phight: [REDACTED] “Oh Goddamnit. DANNY!”
Prompt Creator: @mr-lancers-english-class
Even Danny’s school projects cause ghostly issues and Lancer really should have seen this coming.
Alright fine, Lancer knew this was a bad idea. He knew it. And yet... here they all are, with each of his students doing their self-chosen presentations. And as he should have expected, Every. Single. One. has been on Phantom. Sure at least there’s been some variety. Star’s piece on his fashion and how that reflects on his personality and the era he died was actually fairly interesting (if it wasn’t for the fact that Phantom spiced up his jumpsuit with t-shirts and whatnot sometimes then this would have been a very boring one). Kwan also surprised him some, apparently he’s spent the past year or so sneaking photos of Phantom eating and did a piece on Phantom’s rather peculiar food tastes (who dips their pickles in milkshakes???) as well as effectively providing proof for the existence of ectoplasmic food (there’s no way any earth apples are neon green on the inside). Dash’s wasn’t even correctly calculated, trying to figure out how far Phantom could throw footballs based on his known strength and if he could kill someone by tackling them (disturbingly the answer -regardless of Dash’s bad math- was decidedly yes. Daniel seemed particularly disturbed). And Paulina’s was quite literally a badly written self-insert ship fan fic; the added drawings of what their child would look like only made it worse (Daniel left, not that Lancer could blame him. Lancer’s also glad for the ghost fight interrupting the presentation). Emilie’s was... disturbingly about ghost hunger and purposed the thesis that Phantom, for the good of the town, should eat the aggressor ghosts (he actually had to cut her off for getting too graphic).
But the single most interesting thing was that a ghost apparently caught wind of this and literally Every. Single. Presentation so far had words that were permanently replaced with [REDACTED], which, needless to say, caused some chaos when Samantha gave the very first presentation.
-
Lancer clicked his pen, crossing his legs and resting the evaluation sheet on his thigh, “alright, Samantha. Feel free to start whenever you please, though soon would be preferred”, by ‘preferred’ he had meant required, but no need to be mean. He chooses to ignore the goth teen's eyeroll.
Predictably the projected screen doesn’t work when she opens her file so Lancer has to spend ten minutes fiddling with the outdated tech that they wouldn’t give the school funding to replace. Eventually, he does get it up and running showing Ms. Manson’s title screen reading ‘Phantom And Hate Crimes Against Blood Blossoms’. Lancer’s positive ‘blood blossoms’ are a type of flower, figures she would do something nature-focused. She’d make for a great herbalist or botanist someday. He does catch Daniel and Tucker giving her ‘death glares’, as the kids call it, though; Samatha doesn’t look any less smug. The second page has what he thinks was supposed to be a detailed drawing of a flower but it’s severely pixilated, almost as if it been blurred; Samantha looks visibly upset so he’s going to assume something when wrong with the file or pasting format. He’s not marking on artistic capabilities though, so effort is effort there.
She quickly clicks to the next page, where the actual writing of the assignment is and looks decidedly pissed; Lancer even quirks an eyebrow since at least two-thirds of the words are a very bold noticeable [REDACTED]. Lancer watches her yank out her physical copy while glaring with murderous intent at Daniel -Lancer will have to dock him marks if he messed with another student's project- before looking at the physical copy in bafflement for a few seconds. Half the class shrieking when she drops the papers and basically launches herself over the desks at Daniel, “OH YOU LITTLE FUCKER!!!! HOW THE FUCK!”.
Lancer’s sighs and stands, “language, Ms. Manson”, moving to pick up the papers and quirking an eyebrow over them looking the same. Sighing again and eyeing Daniel, who’s being choked -or throttled perhaps?- by Samantha yet is grinning innocently. “Daniel, messing with other students' work is against student policy”, sighing yet again, “and I’ll let Star go while Samantha fixes her document”, summoning up the blonde while glaring at Daniel. Some days that boy was more trouble than he was worth but he was also insanely bright and had a heart of gold. Lancer knows he’ll do good things someday, and that’s why he still tries with him.
Half the class is snickering or laughing now and Star is very clearly trying not to laugh as she sets up.
However, as soon as it opens up the class is met with a very familiar sight. [REDACTED] litters every single page; he checked. And Star’s physical copy was in the same state.
Kwan blinks, “okay seriously, what is going on”, before scrambling to grab out his own physical copy; the rest of the class going wide-eyed and following suit. Lancer just puts his head in his hands and sighs very audibly while shaking his head. Why could nothing go right? Sighing again as the class erupts into noise.
“Mines all weird too!”.
“Same here!”.
“Okay there is no way Fenturd messed up everyone’s work”.
“And I actually tried on mine! It was about the merits of Phantom getting armour!”.
“Oh damn do we just get auto hundreds now? Please please please say yes”.
“Oh damn, Phantom would actually look awesome in armour”.
“I know right”.
“Can we just skip class entirely now?”.
“Oh my Zone a ghost messed with or work”.
“Holy Shit”.
“Wait! Wait! Wait! You don’t think Phantom did do you?”.
“Why the heck would he do that? How would he even know??????”.
“Oh I hope Phantom was inside my computer. That would be so hot”.
“Oh I don’t know, maybe someone told him or he overheard shit. He’s a ghost, he can be invisible. Heck, he could be here, right now, invisible”.
“Invisible and laughing at us”.
“No! No! Hold up! What if he doesn’t want us writing about him or maybe someone wrote some sus shit and he just nerfed us all for good measure”.
“That would mean Phantom totally read my stuff, aw Hell yeah man. That was some boss shit”,
Lancer sighs and stands up, “alright that’s enough”, sighing again because why did this have to happen to him, “and I apologies for blaming you earlier, Daniel”.
Samantha snaps, “oh no, I still blame him”, and continues glaring at the teen. Lancer suspects Samantha would continue blaming the boy even if it was firmly proven he wasn’t at fault.
Addressing the class again, “here’s what we’re going to do, you’re going to read off what of your projects you actually can and allude to the rest. Please reframe from repeating what you know was there beforehand as I’d rather not have whatever ghost responsible -Phantom or otherwise- come here pissed off”, glaring at few students who look slightly encouraged rather than discouraged by that prospect, “anyone who does will receive automatic zeroes”, ah and the encouraged looks have deflated. Good. Gesturing at Star, “you’re already up here, so do continue”. Better to not bring the clearly infuriated Samantha back to the front until she’s had some time to calm down.
Star nods and clears her throat, thankfully everyone quiets down. “O-okay, well, um”, gesturing at the screen, “I did my piece on Phantom’s sense of fashion and the cover image was one with him dressed in one of the Spook Sense stores meme shirts....”.
-
Lancer shakes away the memory, he honestly slightly regrets giving this project. But regardless right now is Daniel’s turn and Lancer is honestly slightly fearful of what his file is going to look like. Thankfully all their files were saved to his computer before the [REDACTED] debacle, so no one could go back in and edit theirs to add [REDACTED]’s for an easy grade. Lancer’s still not exactly sure how he’s supposed to mark assignments that were anywhere from one-fifth to one-third [REDACTED]. That word will be burned into his head after this grading period.
Lancer moves to find the boys file, but stares when clicking it crashes the computer. Not once. Not twice. But thrice. The fourth time rebooting the computer he inspects the file and is a bit dumbfounded, “Daniel, your entire file’s corrupted. The file type has even been changed to redacted, which I’m fairly sure, isn’t actually any possible file designation”. Everyone’s silent for a bit before bursting out into laughter.
“Just what the Zone did you write, Danny!”.
“Oh we so have to know what this is now”.
“Danny has the forbidden knowledge! We haft found him! The keeper of things forbidden and Ghostly! Haza!”.
“Ha! It was probably so lame that Phantom wanted to save him the embarrassment”.
Lancer sighs, but Daniel gestures Tucker up, “hey Tuck, feel like trying to fix the file”. Tucker chuckles and walks up, though apparently glaring at the boy. Based on Daniel’s smirk he finds this quite amusing.
Tucker does manage to make the file viewable at least. Lancer nods and leans back in his seat, “thank you, Mr. Foley”, while the file loads on screen.
Tucker sits back down with a head shake while Daniel stands at the front and gestures to the screen, “aight, as you can see from my not redacted title-”, that earns a couple laughs, “I did mine on Phantom’s portfolio of crime. Every single time our dear Phantom broke ghost law. Including such wonderful things as, that time he caused not one, not two, not even three, but five, prison breaks in one day. Or that time he invalidated a Observant spectator duel by bringing an inflatable sword”. Samantha slams a hand on her desk, “IT IS YOUR FAULT YOU DICK!”.
Lancer has some serious questions as Daniel clicks for the next page, the entire class going dead silent as a screen comprising of almost nothing but the word [REDACTED] shows. Lancer sighs very audibly. Eventually the class starts up again.
“Fenton... actually has forbidden knowledge”.
“If it wasn’t for the teacher computer saved thing I’d think he was fucking with us”.
“I mean... he is a Fenton, right?”.
“Okay the fact that this entire presentation is on ghost crimes is concerning alone. But they’re forbidden ghost crimes at that”.
“Shit I wanted the tea. Damnit”.
“Better question, how does Danny know?”.
Daniel clicking the button to go forward is very audible. And, Chicken Soup For The Soul, every single page is [REDACTED] to the point of being completely and utterly unintelligible. There are occasional lines pointing out how Phantom apparently ate confetti at a ghosts third wedding (which is apparently illegal for some reason) or that time he beat someone up with a violin that had a pie inside it (Lancer can see this one, Lancer himself has smacked a ghost with stranger). Literally the only photo that isn’t blurred beyond recognition is one of Phantom in a prison uniform (Paulina was very vocal about liking men in uniform here). Lancer is absolutely positive the end of his conclusion ‘[REDACTED] are a bunch of [REDACTED]’ is an insult.
Samantha chucks a boot at his smirking face, “YOU IDIOT. Of course they were going to block you from talking about them. Ancients, I can’t believe you”. Tucker’s busy laughing into his hand.
“Oh my Zone, they know too”.
“They’re really earning that weirdo trio title, huh”.
Daniel snickers as he sits back down, “they broke into my room and wrecked that epic puzzle I was working on. They shoulda seen this shit coming. Literally”. Tucker snorts, “they probably did but couldn’t do anything else about it. They can’t stop you and your endless bullshit”.
“Damn fucking straight”.
Lancer isn’t going to claim to know what exactly they’re talking about but apparently Daniel effectively orchestrated this entire fiasco just to annoy some ghost. Lancer is honestly more impressed than disturbed. A for effort but an A- for making everyone's work nigh unusable.
End.
Prompt: For the last project of their senior year in high school, Mr. Lancer is letting his class do presentations on literally whatever topic they want. He is very, /very/ sure that this is going to go poorly, but that's a problem for later...
#Danny Phantom#phandom#phic phight#phic phight 2021#danny#mr. lancer#sam#star#tucker#basically danny's entire english class#comedy#school projects#danny's a little shit#messing with the observants from afar#my writing#fan fic#phan phic#have a fic suck my dick#phantomphangphucker#gothmoth#thetribalmoth
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What Amber Thinks of the Brothers :
Idea taken from @kitsune-oji && @choccopom
Lucifer
Literally the mom of the group that will ground her kids if they pull something the mom doesn't like. He's pretty overworked most of the time and it's kind of concerning to me. I feel like having me here is a headache to him because he already has to take care of his brothers but I can tell he means well.
Though sometimes I wonder if he gets annoyed with my BS-
Mammon
I know he doesn't mean his words when he's being rude or just doesn't know how to respond to praise but he's actually really nice and he may steal which is not something I like, but can you blame him? I honestly don't like how his brothers always treat him like he's the scum of the Earth and he's not! He's like the chaotic Older Brother I never had and technically a brother I have to get out of trouble or get dragged with
I wanna give him hugs till the day I die >:D
Leviathan
Oooh he's a tough one sometimes! I actually think he's pretty cute but he always makes it sound like he doesn't like me. Though he still invites me to watch anime with him or play games but he still calls me Normie which I don't like hearing! The fact that he's a die-hard TSL fan is something I admire and technically hearing him ramble on and on about different animes is interesting but I think he should seriously stop calling himself a 'gross and yucky otaku' cause he's not! Also I find it cute that he named his lost Snake pet Henry 1.0 and his goldfish Henry 2.0!
I actually like his bedroom tho and I wanna get along with him smoothly if he lets me ^^
Satan
If Smartness and Knowledgeable was a person, that would be Satan himself! Talking with him about different books and topics is pretty interesting to say the least. What I find interesting is that he can hide his wrath behind a smile pretty easily. We get along great coming up with pranks since we're both in the Anti-Lucifer League. Considering I like cats, he also shares his love for them too so that's fun!
He randomly reminds me of Adrien Agreste from the show Miraculous except not dense-
Asmodeus
Honestly I didn't know what to think of him at first but he's pretty energetic so we get along great! He mostly drags me with him to Majolish for clothes shopping or something and it's enjoyable. He would sometimes ask me for makeovers and other things for face care and whatnot and normally I am not a huge makeup person but I agree anyways cause he seems really happy so who am I reject his offer?
I swear he radiates gender envy from a mile away and it's awesome! >w<
Beelzebub
He looked intimidating at first but mans is just hungry most of his time. I learned pretty quickly never ever to touch his food after the first incident I had with him thanks to Mammon but he seemed really nice when he allowed me to bunk with him while my room was being renovated after he accidentally destroyed it. He seems to really care about his twin brother and he's a sweetheart for that!
He should really stop blaming himself for Lilith's death...
Belphegor
I trusted him at first when he was locked up but I did find him pretty sketchy too but I guess I was too naive to realize that until I helped him get out and he uh... you know. Luckily I lived to see another decade or two but that's where my rocky relationship with him began and when Diavolo said I was distantly related to human Lilith who was the brother's dead sister. Though now we get along well since he doesn't seem to have anything against me anymore and honestly he's baby at this rate.
I find it funny how he naps at the most randomest places and Lucifer has to drag him around for RAD xD
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me one master to rule them all#obey me mc#obey me mc: amber#obey me x mc#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me levi#leviathan#obey me leviathan x mc#obey me leviathan x amber#leviathan x mc#leviathan x amber#obey me levi x mc#obey me levi x amber#leviamber
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Do you think canon Zuko has any understanding of the idea of duty? That he, especially given that he aspires to political power, should act like his status as Prince gives him certain responsibilities? That doing what's best for the for Fire Nation or the world might require him to do things which make him unhappy or uncomfortable or require him to make grave personal sacrifices? Does he even understand duty as a concept?
Oof. Complicated questions, thus, this sat in my inbox for a veeeery long time.
I honestly, seriously, genuinely... don't think Zuko truly understood, at any point in canon, what it really meant to be a leader. I know many of us (and I think you, too?) don't particularly like the comics, but in my opinion, The Promise did a surprisingly decent job at highlighting several problems left in the wake of the end of the war, and perhaps unintentionally, this is one of the problems: upon becoming Fire Lord, Zuko is remarkably erratic, unsure of his choices, even seeking advice from his FATHER, of all people, because he has no idea what he's doing.
In the most favorable possible view of Iroh, he taught Zuko to be a better person. I don't entirely adscribe to this belief, but fine, let's concede that he did, or else this answer would never end: not just because you're a good person, however, are you guaranteed to be a good leader. Zuko, as we both know, is far from the best person in the world, and he is prone to making impulsive, emotional mistakes that can cause harm and trouble, and typically, Zuko doesn't face the consequences of most his actions, or the narrative just pins the blame on someone else. When we see this sort of behavior in a real-life politician, the immediate reaction we would have is "this guy is awful at his job", and sadly, I find myself thinking that quite often when it comes to Zuko's canon tenure as Fire Lord.
So... what is Zuko's concept of duty? Going by his pursuit of Aang in the first two seasons, duty is a task given to him by someone whose approval he seeks (in this case, Ozai) and he must pull it off, no matter what, to gain said approval. By Book 3, this logic still applies fairly easily to how Zuko acts over Iroh: I've highlighted in the past that the main motivation for Zuko's redemption is Iroh, doing right by Iroh, making amends to Iroh, regretting how he treated Iroh. He points that out explicitly in Ember Island Players, he does it as well indirectly by bringing up Iroh first of all, when confronting Ozai: this is his main priority. Ergo... I'd honestly say it's safe to judge that this is what Zuko regards as duty, as what he has to do. Iroh wants him to be Fire Lord? That's exactly what he becomes. The difficulties and complications in this particular line of work are taken for granted, and so, we have an outcome that was remarkably well depicted in The Promise, despite that comic's many glaring flaws: Zuko gets swept back and forth, twisted left and right by all the pressures and responsibilities, because he has no idea what he's doing as Fire Lord, and no idea/experience in how to be a real leader.
As far as I can tell, the core of the matter is that nobody really seems to have taken Zuko all that seriously as future Fire Lord. Ozai, evidently, wasn't training Zuko to be his personal heir. Ozai himself is a questionable source of information regarding learning what it means to be Fire Lord, considering he, as well, wasn't raised to take that role, just as he didn't raise Zuko for it. Yet Iroh didn't exactly teach Zuko how to lead anyone either, as far as I can tell: his lessons were meant to be of a more personal nature, and even then, Zuko had lots of trouble accepting most of them. Iroh's firebending lessons to Zuko were typically stunted in the basics because he was hot-headed and rash about getting to the intense and interesting stuff...
So: neither Ozai nor Iroh gave Zuko actual responsibilities. Ozai gave him a punishment Zuko was trying to endure however possible, a punishment he wanted to prove himself unworthy of by finding the Avatar and "regaining his honor". Then, Iroh punished Zuko as well by giving him the cold shoulder in Book 3, then he escaped and Zuko did everything he did, after betraying Ozai, to prove himself worthy of Iroh's kindness once again. It's not actual duty, the way it is in Azula's case: no doubt, Azula wants Ozai's approval too, but she has the madman's trust when it comes to finding her brother and uncle, to taking down the Avatar, and to conquering Ba Sing Se, as far as anyone can tell. I do doubt Ozai gave her all these missions at once, but he gave her the resources through which she pulled off ALL of them: she had the firebending procession, she had a ship, she had a train-tank, she had mounts... Zuko had a rundown ship that looked like a 1:10 scale version of every other ship in the harbor back in the very third episode: he was being punished. In contrast, Azula is entrusted with a mission, with LEADERSHIP, while Zuko has no visible, tangible, objective experience with the latter (consider how Azula steals the Dai Li's loyalty from under Long Feng: when did we see Zuko pulling off something like this? Even with Jet, Zuko was more of an associate to the Freedom Fighters, and Jet was still the leader).
I've always thought Zuko wasn't prepared to be Fire Lord, and the main reasons are the ones you indirectly point out through this ask: Zuko doesn't seem to treat the throne as a responsibility, but as his right. I won't get tired of pointing out that this was NOT Zuko's birthright, he was NOT born thinking he'd be Fire Lord: he was born to the second branch in the Fire Nation family. We literally SEE the day in which Lu Ten's death is revealed to him. According to somewhat official sources? He's ELEVEN in Zuko Alone's flashbacks. I, personally, think he looks a little younger than that, but I think that's the official wikia age, no idea where they got that info but that's what it says. Meaning...
Zuko, objectively, only had been crown prince for FIVE YEARS.
Zuko was NOT raised, not by his mother, not by his father, with the belief that the throne would one day be his (Ursa is gone before Ozai is crowned and Ozai clearly wanted Azula for the job rather than Zuko).
And yet, when you backtrack to the show? It seriously looks like that was the case. He clings to the throne in Books 1 and 2 as though he had no other purpose in life, as though this was everything that was promised to him (in contrast, Azula only ever indicates wanting the throne in Sozin's Comet: Part One). Even when he's an outlaw, discarded and cast out, he STILL talks about the throne, as though most his identity were built upon the notion that he must become Fire Lord: why? How come? Within five years, he's crafted his entire existence around being the heir to the throne? That's... a bit weird.
And a bit wishful, too. Which is why I commend that the comics show him struggling as Fire Lord, if anything they should've had him struggling MORE than that, because Zuko is simply NOT prepared for these responsibilities. He never gave any indication, any sign, of seeing it as such. He sees it as his right, his birthRIGHT. Why? Why more people don't ponder how utterly strange this behavior is, beats me. But it really does bother me that Zuko built his entire existence around being Fire Lord in a very similar way to how Korra built her own about being the Avatar. I have very little praise to give LOK in general, but the premise of Korra learning she was a person, a human, and not just the Avatar felt like the perfect parallel to Aang's story, where he was very much anchored in his humility and belief that he was just "one kid", and his rejection of his duties as the Avatar was meant to change gradually as he learned to accept himself as he was. Korra, however, never fully hit the mark with this subject, in my personal opinion... much as Zuko doesn't hit the mark either, since the show's only direct attempt to "deconstrue" Zuko's clinging to the throne happens in one dialogue, and his attachment to the idea is built up again, right afterwards:
Zuko: And then ... then you would come and take your rightful place on the throne? Iroh: No. Someone new must take the throne. An idealist with a pure heart and unquestionable honor. It has to be you, Prince Zuko. Zuko: Unquestionable honor? But I've made so many mistakes. Iroh: Yes, you have. You've struggled; you've suffered, but you have always followed your own path. You restored your own honor, and only you can restore the honor of the Fire Nation. Zuko: I'll try, Uncle.
And there we have it. The only point in the show (that I can remember) where Zuko seemed to not feel worthy of the throne and questioned he should be the one sitting on it (RIGHTFULLY!), buuuuuuuut he goes right back to wanting it, right afterwards, based on how this single exchange was enough for him to be 100% determined to take down his sister, merely a few lines later.
As for his willingness to make personal sacrifices... some might say he was outright willing to die for Katara in the finale -- though I'll point out he was trying to redirect the lightning anyway, didn't do it as well as he should have, but he wasn't exactly, consciously, trying to DIE for her... --, some might say that he left Mai behind in the FIre Nation, and that as well was a sacrifice... but was it? We don't see him missing her, or suffering about her fate, at any point in time after SHE sacrifices herself for him in the Boiling Rock (my biggest gripe over this particular canon couple is this, tbh). I feel like the show generally presents Zuko's situation as somewhat... self-sacrificial? Especially in Books 1 and 2, and yet that's really not the case: it isn't Zuko himself who makes the choice of traveling to find Aang, it's a punishment inflicted upon him.
This particular view upon his circumstances makes it so Zuko is never responsible for... well, any of his choices? It's always someone else's fault, therefore, whatever he suffers through, there's always someone he can (and usually does) resent for it. Therefore... I can't genuinely think of anything Zuko sacrificed in order to come as far as he did. He was forced to let go of things by his father, typically, by Zhao as well, maybe, but even then, it's not like we saw that he has a super healthy and happy relationship with, I don't know, Earth Kingdom people (his only meaningful positive EK bond was with Jin, which went nowhere and goes forgotten after a single mini episode)? The Palace staff? The commoners of the Fire Nation (they just treat him like a hero and he seems awkward and distant about it anyway, like he can really just do without their worship)? He doesn't have other friends beyond Azula's own friends... thus, he doesn't sacrifice anything that really matters. And in a sense, some people might say he doesn't have to sacrifice anything at all: he already went through so much strife and struggle that why would he need to sacrifice anything else? But the thing is... you DO have to learn to make such sacrifices if you're going to be a good king.
So often, people who devote themselves to their jobs have to consciously neglect their families, to name one thing: Zuko neglects Mai and she explodes at him for it in The Promise, then he just tries to get her back at all costs in Smoke & Shadow, with no thoughts given to the fact that maybe he isn't ready to juggle both a relationship and the throne, that maybe Mai could be happier with someone other than him, someone who can give her the attention and relationship she's looking for... THOSE are the sacrifices I'd be referring to, personally, sacrifices where his happiness and peace of mind have to be set aside for the sake of something much more important than himself, and I expect that's the kind of sacrifices you're referring to, too. I seriously don't think he's ready to make them, and with the comics as reference, there's seriously no evidence to suggest he's prepared to accept these burdens that come with the heavy mantle of leadership and ruling. I've never seen any signs of him being ready for it, myself. Maybe I need to reexamine the show and see if maybe I'm missing something... but I don't really think I am.
The worst part, for me, is that Zuko isn't even doing the bulk of the things he's doing in pursuit of genuine happiness: he's doing it over a sense of destiny. He never stops to reason with that destiny, to wonder if maybe he doesn't need to be Fire Lord, if maybe he could have a life beyond that role. Book 2 veeeery briefly suggests he MIGHT be on his way to questioning that destiny, but as I've said before, I don't see the sense in Zuko's big change of heart after the Appa incident considering we don't really understand what he's learned, other than how to be the perfect nephew for Iroh, apparently. Zuko never really is happy, as he says in the show: his happiest moments are with Mai and they're only like a 25% of his relationship with her, everything else is a mess (and his relationship with her isn't exactly the core of his character, either). So, the way I see it... Zuko is even worse off than it looks at first glance. He's out to fulfill a destiny he has never stopped to reason with, a destiny he's 100% sure is his, despite he has only been on that path, objectively, for five years? Despite he wasn't raised all along under the belief that this was what he was supposed to be? If given a chance to be genuinely happy, what on earth would he even do? A lot of the growth I gave him in Gladiator was based on that particular question: is the throne really what Zuko needs to be happy? It doesn't look like it, even in canon. If it's not... then it's not happiness he seeks, it's some sort of sense of assurance that he's doing the right thing, according to the figure of authority he follows at a set point in time: by Book 3, said authority is Iroh, and Iroh wants him on the throne. His motivation, as far as I can see it, is as simple as that.
Long story short... I don't think Zuko really has a strong grasp on many concepts that he absolutely should have reasoned with and worked out in order to become Fire Lord. In a sense, he's way too young for the role he's given, for the heavy burdens he has to deal with, and I'll NEVER see the sense in not having Iroh taking the throne (beyond how "poetic" the creators and writers found it to crown Zuko to finish his story, of course), at least for a short time, before Zuko can be ready. This is exactly why I wrote things that way in my oneshot where Azula takes Zuko's role, more or less: Iroh serves as regent while Azula prepares for taking the full role of Fire Lord when she's ready. I love her, she's awesome, I absolutely adore her character... but I don't think an Azula who was sidelined and sent on a long voyage with her uncle for YEARS could possibly be ready for the responsibilities of being Fire Lord right away.
Meanwhile? Iroh was given leadership of military missions enough times that he became a general in the Fire Nation forces. By all evidence, he was Fire Lord Azulon's pampered and spoiled son, whom he DID prepare for the duties of a Fire Lord for as long as Iroh was born: Iroh literally had fifty-ish years of preparation, as far as I can tell? How is he NOT the better suited person to take the throne, if just temporarily, while his nephew learns what it really means to rule by watching him, or by maybe learning leadership by managing smaller duties first, a specific town or city, and then putting his knowledge to good use by becoming Fire Lord properly?
Eh... because it wouldn't be an epic enough finale for the show, I suppose. That's the only answer I can find for this particular question.
So... yeah. That got long :'D but in short... I don't think Zuko has a strong grasp on responsibility and duty, let alone on the burdens inherent to these concepts. Yet more reasons why his character's arc can't hit all the marks it should, imo, to make it as great as the whole fandom is already convinced it is.
#zuko-always-lies#more zuko meta#and it got long#:'D#if anyone needs a read more#let me know and I'll add it#but for now#it is what it is#you know it really is sad to write all this when I'm more or less making peace with Zuko via Gladiator#and actually making him reason with soooo much stuff#that he never really had to in the show#*siiiiigh*#he'll never be my fav#that much is obvious#but he could be MORE#and it's sad that he's not#very sad
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Introducing: Lyssa Ward, slasher OC
(heres the pic crew i used!!!)
Full name: Lyssa Ward (original name being Lyssa Ramsey)
Nickname: She really only lets her S/O or close friends (which are few) call her anything other than her name. Lys and L are the ones that are used and that she can tolerate.
Dob: November 13, 1997
Age: 25
Height: 5’7
Hair color: Naturally a dark brown color but she dyes it green. Think of a lush forest as the sunsets. Her eyebrows are her natural color as well and she has a slit in her left one (not my choice, it’s a scar)
Eye color: Deep brown.
Occupation: She’s a freelance photographer and a damn good one. A few of her photos have won prestigious contests and she has a bit of a name for herself in the community.
Likes: Photography, whoever she currently has her eyes on, collecting coins (don’t be mean to her about it its cute), starting and winning arguments/fights, cracking her knuckles, smoking, drinking, blood
Dislikes: Hospitals, cops, men who think she’s weak just because she's a women, people disagreeing with her, failing in any way
History: Growing up as the oldest of five, Lyssa took the blame for a lot of what went wrong to shield her siblings from their father. She had his anger and violent tendencies which caused them to butt heads often, landing her in the hospital. She grew to not only resent her father but her siblings, feeling as though they did things on purpose to get her in trouble, taking advantage of her love. She hit her siblings the older she got, her rage building with each beating she got.
The night she turned 18, she killed her father in his sleep followed by her siblings. She made their deaths quick but drew his out, taking her time to make sure he really felt the pain he had inflicted upon her for years. After they were dead, she took photos of their bodies as a keepsake and then set the house on fire. She went on the run though no one looked for her as she was presumed dead.
She started over with a new last name and though she tried to forget about what she did, the feeling of euphoria she got from it was hard to ignore. Her rage is what makes her kill. She has violent mood swings and finds it hard to be in long term relationships due to this. Each time she kills she takes a photo, usually with the murder weapon still inside the body, and develops them at home and hangs them in her closet.
Stuff to know: She chooses her victims at random. Normally its people who really piss her off. She normally kills men (they just tend to get on her nerves the most lol) but she will kill anyone. Like, literally anyone. Kids, old people, women; all fair game.
-She hates hospitals with a burning passion. If she happens to get hurt when out she’ll come home and fix herself up or, if you wanna have her fall in love with you, offer to help her out.
-She smokes. Mainly cigs but will indulge in weed when she needs to relax. She has a fear of getting addicted to any hard substances so she wont even consider doing anything else. She doesn’t consider herself ‘addicted’ to cigarettes but she absolutely is
-Lyssa can’t go more than a few months without killing but she doesn’t normally plan them out in advance. Besides watching them for a day or two, she’s fairly impulsive and hard-headed; once she decides whos her victim it’s nearly impossible to get her to let them live.
-She’s honestly bordering on yandere when she’s in a serious relationship. She has plenty of flings but very rarely does she get into long-term relationships with someone she has feelings for. If you catch her eye, honestly... good fucking luck lol.
-If you want to get on her good side, be a little sarcastic but don’t act like you’re better (or on the same level-) as her. She enjoys being in charge in all aspects of the relationship so she likes dating someone who will look to her for most things, but she needs someone who can keep up.
-She dresses a little provocative and has a good sense of fashion but she doesn’t care what her S/O dresses like or looks like. She may hate a good majority of people but she doesn’t judge on shit like that.
-She loves using the pet names little one, bunny, baby, and doll. For her she’d literally melt if you called her some sappy name like buttercup or honey bee. She thinks its very domestic and is just so fucking cute. She also accepts babe, love, mommy, and mistress. Even in public for those last two heheh
NSFW stuff: Shes a slut and you’re her whore <3 relationship goals
-She’s sadistic and needs someone who will indulge in her darker fantasies. She’d never kill someone shes fucking but like... she’d get pretty close.
-Knife and blood kink, fire kink, dumbifiication, voyeurism, predator/prey, chasing, cuckholding (for you), training, mommy kink, BDSM, somnophilia, slapping, marking; all things she’s super into but ONLY with consent. She has safe words and systems in check and would only do these with people who are 100% alright with them
-Queen of aftercare. Won’t go to bed unless you’re 100% satisfied
-Very into degrading her partner and rarely lets the dynamic change but if you catch her on a really good day she may indulge you for a bit. She thinks its very cute when you try and take the reigns from her but she will eventually take back over and show you why she’s the one who owns you and not the other way around.
-She would def put her S/O in a cage if they were particularly bad
-When you’re dating her she doesn’t want you touching yourself. She has a high sex drive and, despite what’d you’d think, she’s very much a giver. You want to cum? She’ll drop everything she’s doing and milk you fr.
#s1mps slasher oc#b's slasher oc#Lyssa Ward#Lyssa#my slash#f1nalboys masterlist#f1nalboys writing#f1nalboys works
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Mission Debrief: Chapter Forty-two
...It's all coming together.
I'm just going to come outright and say it; I had no idea what to write for this review- not because there wasn't anything to discuss, but rather this chapter gave us so much that I didn't know what to focus on first. Chapter forty-two has single-handedly thrown open the doors to a hundred different theories, and believe me when I say that after a whole night of redbull and theorizing I couldn't come up with any clear answers (the folks over at the Strix discord group can attest to that).
So here's what we're gonna do; I'm not going to focus on the chapter itself.
It was cute. Cardshark Anya is hilariously awesome. Damian is a little shit (whom I adore), and the chapters where the kids can just be kids are- in my opinion- the best.
That's all I'm going to say on the matter. For the rest of this review, I want to go over all the facts we know so far about the story and setting. All of the things Endo has been slowly building up in the background and the pieces that we can stitch together from them, starting with this chapter. Two key things stuck out to me.
In the entirety of the story up till this point, this is the first time we have heard mention of a royal anything- and not only that, but this chef is a former royal chef. This of course implies that a) said chef was fired (not likely given that Eden wouldn't likely associate with someone who was disgraced like that) or retired, or b) that there is no royalty anymore. Ostania is a totalitarian state and the main power of the government- from what we've seen- lies with the ruling political party, i.e the National Unity Party, a.k.a Desmond's party. Such a political structure would have no room for royalty in a governing capacity, and therein begs the question; is there still a royal/noble class- albeit in a non-governing sense- or was it abolished sometime in the recent past?
Classical language is not proper speaking and diction like I had originally thought. Classical language is a specific term typically used to describe a dead language or dialect (think Latin, or Hebrew before it was revived). I find this particularly interesting because under no circumstance would a child as young as Anya know anything about a dead language unless- as Loid points out- she was exposed to it as a toddler. It would have had to have been when she was very young, as she herself doesn't realize she knows this information. This would mean she likely learned it from her birth family; Anya was old enough to remember the lab and scientists, meaning she became Subject 007 later on in life- otherwise she would have remembered knowing classical language.
These two concepts are incredibly important to keep in mind, both now and later on as the story progresses. We now know that a royal class plays a factor in the political game that Twilight and everyone else is playing, and we know that Anya knows information that she shouldn't know otherwise (even with her mind-reading powers). So where does that leave us?
Honestly, for the first time...I'm kind of stumped?
Let's look back at the story and see what else we can piece together- maybe there's something in there we can extrapolate for our purposes. Another clue to point us in the direction that Endo is seemingly funneling us towards.
From chapter forty-one
Franklin Perkins was a man who believed in making his country a better place to live. In his eyes and from what he saw, Ostania wasn't going in the right direction- but why? He blames his lack of money for his mother's death, and we see him hold resentment towards the government over socialistic policies. Wealth is something to be shared with others, not hoarded for ones self. That seems to be where Ostania's moral compass is pointing towards, but is that really the case?
From chapter 39
Mr. Green mentions that people have been fleeing to Westalis; from the way he says this it sounds like this is happening currently- not in the past- and people are going so far as to travel through a third country just to get to Westalis. Such a journey isn't without its perils, so anyone attempting to crossover from Ostania would likely be taking a huge risk in doing so. Not only that, but most of what we've seen in the story is Ostanians loathing Westalins...so what would compel people to do this in the first place?
From chapter three As Anya reads the minds of people gathered at a politcal rally near the start of the manga, we see their disgruntled thoughts behind her. There's multiple mentions of losing jobs and not having enough money- some people are even hungry. Most of these people blame Westalis for their troubles, though not the leader of the rally, ironically.
Also from chapter 3
We find out (and often forget) early on that there are multiple political parties in Ostania. Donovan leads the National Unity Party, whereas the political rally we see here is hosted by the Nationalist Party. The latter preaches peace with the west, but many of the people gathered reject this outright. This is important; the N.U.P is the most successful political party in Ostania, which means a majority of the country's citizens approve of their platform. If we're to assume the Nationalist Party's platform is to advocate for peace with Westalis, then we must also assume that the N.U.P stands for the opposite; direct aggression with the west.
From chapter 31 The Zacharis Dossier, though ultimately a bust, hinted at rumors that have permeated East and West since the start of the cold war. We know for a fact that human experiments did indeed take place in Ostania, so it also stands to reason that there is at least a kernel of truth to the claims of P.O.W (prisoner of war) massacres conducted by the west. It's a heinous crime, and also one that leads to another question; why would any country go through with it in the first place? In addition, piggy-backing off the former point;
From chapter 19 While Loid details Project Apple, he uses the word 'regime' to describe the former Ostanian government. The literal definition of a regime is a government, especially an authoritarian one (Oxfrod Dictionary). I won't highlight all the specifics of what is and isn't authoritarianism, but essentially the point I'm trying to make here is that the current Ostanian administration is still very much a regime. Donovan acts as the authoritarian ruler (or would-be ruler; we don't know if he's actively in charge or is looking to usurp power for himself) and continues on the legacy of the former government. We know for a fact that this is the case because Anya is only at most 6 years old, likely even younger. That would mean the experiments being run on her had to have been recent, which fits with the time frame that we established at the beginning of this rabbit hole- it also aligns with what we know about what Donovan has been doing on the back end of things. Those who have kept up with my reviews know what I'm talking about; gloom pharmaceuticals, the truth serum, OSO-R, etc. All of that, which then leads us to...
...right back where we started. So...what then? What can we conclude from all this? At least a few things;
Anya is tied to Desmond- either directly or indirectly.
Anya's past is also Ostania's past; she's familiar with a dead language that's no longer spoken, and there's definitely a reason why no one speaks it anymore.
Ostania is in a period of political and economic turmoil. This also comes on the heels of a (possible) former monarchy, and the struggle of a country willing to embrace authoritarianism so long as it means staying alive.
WISE and Westalis are not innocent in this game of chess with Ostania and the SSS, and more than likely have committed atrocities that may or may not be directly tied to Ostania and- possibly- Anya's past.
And...this is as far as I can go. I've hit a wall, as have other people I've talked to. We're still missing pieces to the puzzle. Endo will of course provide us with more clues and theory fodder as the weeks and months progress, but for now this is as far as I can go on my own. On the one hand I feel defeated because I can't come up with a meaningful explanation for everything and present it in a neat little bundle for you all to read, but on the other hand I'm thoroughly enjoying this. I'm more engaged with this manga and story than any other I've read before; I'm at the edge of my seat every week, and I'm sure most of you are, too. For now, I'll leave the review here. I find it fitting to leave it open ended, just as Endo did with Loid's self-imposed question. Hopefully, like him, we can find answers in the near future.
Also, BONUS...
...No fun panel with a snappy comment this time. Instead, I’m going to humbly ask for your help.
If you have any ideas about where you think the story is going, theories as to how everything fits together, or just really want to discuss the manga with other fans- please check out our forum and share with us. We’d love to hear what you all think; not only that, but a lot more heads makes theorizing both more productive and a whole lot more fun. Check it out if you have the time, or- if you don’t feel like clicking on any links- you can always leave a comment either on this post or send us an ask or message. Anytime, any reason, we’d love to talk SxF.
Again, thanks for reading, and we’ll see you all next chapter!
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suna rintaro is NOT a genius.
summary: you loved the idea of soulmates. suna rintaro didn’t. it isn’t that hard to put two and two together to realize that maybe people with different opinions on things don’t belong together.
part 2
a/n: this was literally supposed to be a series, i gave up on it because i just didn’t like the way it turned out. it used to be called “out of my league” and this was the intro. i also renamed it. just emptying drafts!! please don’t get confused with the random timeskip, once again, this was a part of a series i never ended up posting😭
WARNING!!: suggestive themes, mentions of death, idk kinda angsty but tell me if i missed anything
Soulmates. Whatever the hell that means. The idea of soulmates is something I truly don’t understand. It’s bullshit, honestly. It’s all-pervasive.
My mother always told me I'd eventually find "the one.” I used to believe that when I was younger of course. But in my opinion? It’s all cliches. It's unhelpful, and it's certainly not true. Destiny is an excuse for the weak. Why do you think most marriages end in divorce? It's 'cause people who believe they are “destined to be" assume everything will fall into place without any effort. I don't appreciate people pontificating bullshit like that just to make me feel better, especially if they haven't found their "soulmate" themselves. My sister once told me, “People who believe in soulmates are more likely to break up and encounter more difficulty in their relationship, which will lead them to give up on one another eventually.”
I sure do believe that.
My mother is a prime example. Fumeiko Suna, my dear mother. Well, she clearly hasn’t found hers. I found out when I came home after a tedious day of school in 5th grade and found my dear mother on the floor crying, with bruises all over her face and a busted lip.
Initially, I thought a burglar had broken into our home once again, but if that were the case then there would’ve been missing furniture. But there wasn’t.
In fact, the place seemed cleaner than usual. When I ran up to her and asked her what had happened, there he was. The devil himself. My father. He reeked of alcohol, and I could detect his shadow towering over me. It’s funny how that I think of it. I used to fear that son of a bitch. Now, I’m way taller than him, and hate his guts. I turned around to see a faux-sympathetic smile plastered on his face.
He explained how my mother was being “clumsy” and had fell and busted her lip on one of the corners of the kitchen table and when I turned back around to face my mother, she smiled gently and nodded in agreement. She didn’t say anything after that.
It was then I realized my father had beat my mother to a pulp.
Long story short, when I found it was my father, sure, I was frightened. In fact, I remember going into my siblings’ rooms to inform them, they shrugged it off and told me that dad had been doing it for a while now.
Over time, when my dad had found out that I was aware, he didn't mind beating the absolute shit out of my mother in front of all three of us. This was when my burning hatred for that man started. Nobody in the house even attempted to stop him. I did a few times, though. He took all his anger out on me. At least my mom had a break for the day.
I almost pitied my mother. Almost. Maybe if she was strong enough to leave him, then yeah, I’d feel bad. But she still decides to stay with his sorry ass. It’s pathetic. It’s unrequited love or whatever you call it. How could she still love that asshole?
I mean, I’m not even going to lie, I’m an asshole too, but I’m definitely not my dad. I would never want to be him. He’s not someone I looked up to, he doesn’t do anything inspirational. He’s a businessman. He travels the majority of the time, and I’m pretty sure my mom invites men over when he’s gone. I don’t care enough to find out. But if I ever hear some guy rearranging my mom’s guts, I’ll kill him. I don’t even blame my mother. What she’s doing is wrong, she knows it and so do both of my older siblings. But they don't seem to care so why should I?
Who knows why she just won’t leave him. Maybe it’s cause they don’t want to ruin how people view our “picture perfect” family. I wonder what they’d say. “I thought the Suna’s were the ideal family? I guess not.”
My dad would probably lose it if he heard that.
Both my mother and my father are the cause of this broken family of mine. They never fed me or any of my siblings the love we always desired when we were younger. They never came to any of my volleyball games when I was younger. They never applauded me for the little recitals we’d have in class in primary school. They were never even here for most of my childhood. They always put money first and left us with the housekeepers. Hell, the housekeepers probably know me better than my own parents.They failed as parents. I despise them for it. They’re most likely the reason I am the way I am, but to be honest?
I don’t give a fuck.
In fact, I should thank them! Because of how they “raised” me, i’m extremely blunt, which is why people respect me. I use the hatred I have for my family and take it out on people and no, I’m not proud of that. I may be a heartless asshole, but I like that people fear me. The hell? Does that make me a sadist? Either way, people know to never fuck with me cause I’d fuck their shit up. I’ve overheard many people say it’s ‘cause of my privilege. It probably is. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure can buy you many other things.
If my parents were broke, I’d probably be expelled from school by now. Abuse of alcohol and drugs are forbidden on school property. I don’t even take them at school, I somewhat care about my education and health, but sometimes I just need to blow some steam. Even if I did, nobody’s gonna say shit since my dad is the head of Japan’s board of education. How did his ass even get there?
Call me lonely or cynical. Maybe I am. But how is that a bad thing? Why do people need a significant other to rely on? What, a soulmate is just going to turn my life upside down then suddenly bring me happiness? Pfft, I’m gonna need actual proof that shit like that still happens. I’ve only seen shit like that in fairy tale movies. It’s whatever, though. I can live with being alone. I’ve basically been alone my whole life and it isn’t as bad as people make it.
You loved the idea of having a soulmate. The thought of meeting someone who just understood you, accepted you for who you were, and most importantly, loved you excited you. You couldn’t wait to meet your soulmate.
But recently, you weren’t sure soulmates existed.
When your older sister, Akira, came into your room and burst into tears, it frightened you. Your older sister, the one who’d always provide you advice on relationships and how to keep one was in your room sobbing hysterically because hers hadn’t worked out.
“I just can't believe it,” she sobbed.
You couldn’t believe it either. Your sister had recently gotten engaged to her boyfriend of 9 years. They started dating at the age of 15 and managed to make things work out even after high school, and out of all those years of dating, they never broke up. Not even once.
They’d go on romantic dates on Saturdays and they’d always write love letters to one another every day, just to remind one another of how grateful they were to have each other in their lives. On Halloween, they’d dress up as fictional characters from TV shows and books and take cute selfies and bake a bunch of sweets. They’d invite you to come bake with them, but you would politely deny. You knew they were only offering so you wouldn’t feel left out, which you appreciated.
Of course, they’d argue every now and then, but at the end of the day, they always managed to talk things out. Oh to have a relationship like theirs. They were everything you wanted to have in a relationship and more.
“I really thought he was the one for me, y’know?” No, you don’t know. But that doesn't matter. What mattered was cheering your sister up.
“Maybe he wasn’t ‘the one’ Akira, and that’s okay! People come and go all the time, soulmates come and go all the time as well-”
“You still believe soulmates are real, huh?” she let out a humorless laugh and sniffed her nose, “What If I missed my one shot at love, Y/N? What if I lost my soulmate?”
That’s some deep shit.
Now that you think about it, were soulmates real? Soulmates come and go, yes, you’re aware of that, but even though they leave, it’s always temporary. Soulmates always find a way back to their other half, the piece that completes them.
Your dad never made it back to your mother.
He died in a car crash 5 years ago. Your mother and father had been arguing because she claimed your father was cheating on her since he wouldn’t let her check his phone.
You were 13 at the time. Your sister Akira was accompanying you in your room, listening to them arguing back and forth with one another. There was furniture flying across the room, glass breaking, and both of them throwing curses at each other. You were scared. They never argued in front of you and your sister. They'd bicker sometimes, but it was never anything too deep.
Eventually, your father had enough of your mother’s false accusations, and out of anger, he packed his things and left home. For weeks. It wasn’t until one of your uncles called your mother and broke the news. She didn’t take it very well.
Late 2012-early 2013.
Not many people came to your father’s funeral, his family didn’t like the fact that he and your mother were together, they said your mother was trouble, but your dad still stayed with her, even if that meant it would completely destroy the bond he had with his family. Now that’s true love, you had thought. Only your mother, Akira, the Sunas, your uncle, and you, of course, attended the funeral.
It hurt a lot. It hurt when your mother informed both your grandparents on your mother and father’s side and all they could do is put the blame on her. It hurt how they had claimed you, Akira and your mother were a hindrance to your dear father’s well-being. How could they be so cruel at a time like this?
That was the first time you ever questioned if soulmates were real. Maybe they fell in love at the wrong time? Who knows.
After your father’s passing, Fumiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, was there to help your family out financially. Your mother couldn’t even find the motivating to go to work. Your mother and Fumiko have been best friends since junior high, they’ve literally been inseparable ever since. In fact, after they both got married, they decided to live right next to each other.
Your mom didn’t cope with your father’s death very well; none of you did. But your mom had it the worst.
She would cope with alcohol and clubbing which would always result in her bringing different men home almost every night. You didn’t say much about it, you thought it would be selfish to since that’s what seemed to make your mother feel better about herself, but your sister hated it. She was already 19 and in college at the time, but when she visited and found out that your mother had basically been neglecting you, she was furious.
“Seriously, mom? This is what you’re gonna do while your 13-year-old daughter is in her room having a literal mental breakdown because of your childish behavior?” Your sister had barged into your mother’s room when she thought you were asleep, she was screaming loud.
“You’re interrupting something important, Akira. You know better than to-”
“Oh, shut the hell up mom. You’re the last person on earth to be saying shit like that.”
“Well, if you’re done, you can leave my room now. You’re being disrespectful, and this behavior is not tolerated!” Your mother was screaming now. The man in the bed covering his body under the covers and looking back and forth between Akira and your mother.
“Sakiya, maybe you should hear your daughter out-”
“Not now.” your mother scarcely interrupted the man, eye contact never leaving Akira. “Y/N has never complained about this when you were in college. She knows this is my way of coping, why can’t you understand that too!”
Akira scoffed. “So what, getting fucked by random strangers you find on the filthy streets is your way of coping? Getting wasted every damn night to the point where Y/N has to drag you up to bed is okay with you? Do you even know how much this is affecting Y/N? Did you even bother asking her how she felt? I hate breaking it to you mom, but you need serious help.”
“You selfish child!” Your mother screamed, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her body, getting up from the bed. “How dare you say that to your own mother?”
“I’m only telling the truth! If you’re the mother, then it’s your job to be taking care of Y/N, not neglecting her. When’s the last time you’ve engross in an actual conversation with her when you were fully sober?”
Your mother was silent. She quickly walked up to Akira and grabbed her by the hair and slammed her headfirst against the wall.
“You’ve got a big mouth! Maybe I should wash it with soap like I did back in the day, hm?” Akira was attempting to push her mother away, but she wouldn’t let go of her grip. The man that was still on your mother’s bed was in panic, yelling her name, which didn’t have any effect. He might as well stop.
"Look," Akira mumbled, struggling to get away from your mother's grip, "I know it's been hard ever since dad left-"
“Mom! Let go of her!” You cried from the door of her room.
All 3 adults froze and looked at your glassy eyes, mouths wide open.
“Hey, kiddo, I thought you were asleep?” Akira playfully said, your mother let go of Akira and crossed her arms then looked away from you.
“Well, I can't really go to sleep when there’s a bunch of adults yelling about my well-being,” you muttered incoherently. You quickly wiped the uncontrollable tears off your face and sighed.
“Honey,” your mom started, she walked slowly to you, carefully examined your face, and attempted to hug you, but you didn’t accept the offer which made your mother frown. She stopped walking until she was almost face to face with you and placed a hand on your shoulder gently. “Baby, your sister told me that you weren’t happy. Is this true?”
You looked away from her and stared dully at the floor, subtly shifting your feet, then you softly shook your head “no.”
“See Akira, Y/N is happy. So please stop stressing her out.” Your mother said through gritted teeth, then faced you once again. “Y/N honey, how about I go tuck you into bed, hm? I’m so sorry for the excessive noise that was caused.”
“Mom, how clueless can you be? Y/N looks miserable! It’s unhealthy for Y/N to be living-“
Slap.
Your mother just slapped Akira on the face.
“I know what’s best for my daughter! I am her mother! You are not the one who should be telling me how to take care of my own kid!”
“That’s enough, Sakiya.” a familiar voice said from the door.
“Fumeiko-“
“It’s fine. Sakiya, we need to talk.” It was Fumeiko Suna, your mother’s best friend, also known as your next door neighbor. She had been standing in the hallways the whole time, you didn’t even know she was there. Akira was the one who called her over.
That night your mother agreed to get help for her drinking problem. She was gone for 6 months. During those 6 months, the Suna’s took you in since Akira would be in college and you couldn’t have been more grateful.
You and Rintaro were the only kids in the house, being that you both were the same age and the others were in college. It was okay, they were all very polite, dinners were awkward, you could feel some sort of tension between the family but you didn’t pay any attention to it.
When your mom finally came back, it was awkward at first. She still seemed the same, loving and caring, just sober and free of alcohol. It was nice. You two spent the weekends bonding at the mall, watching a movie, or even getting your nails done. Eventually, she gained your trust back, and you couldn’t have been happier.
January 2017.
“Akira, don’t say that. You may not believe me now, but you are such an amazing person, don’t ever think you’ll never find love again. It’s all about having a positive mindset!” you said, thoughtfully stroking her hair as her head laid on your chest.
“I told you that.”
“You did,” you chuckled, “you should take your own advice.
“Oh, shut up!” you both laughed, and Akira let out a shaky sigh. “Thank you, Y/N.”
“Of course, you don't need to thank me. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
— so this is one of the writings that i wrote in January 😭 it’s been in my drafts and i re-read it once and instantly hated it right after. if there’s any typos please tell me!!
— also i wanna apologize again for putting gmds on hiatus,, i feel so bad 😭 i wanna make it up to you guys but idk how so if you have suggestions pls tell me
#suna rintaro#suna angst#suna rintaro imagine#suna imagines#suna x y/n#hq suna#suna smau#suna headcanons#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu masterlist#haikyuu!!#haikyuu suna#hq imagines#suna x reader#suna rintaro x reader#haikyuu series#suna rintaro angst#haikyuu angst#haikyuu fluff#sunarin#inarizaki suna#haikyuu x reader smau#kenma smau#kuroo smau#kenma x reader#hinata x reader#kozume kenma#akaashi smau#akaashi x reader#kuroo x reader
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So for the most part, I outright reject the finale. But I do think, in light of the whole "Jimmy was supposed to be in the bar, and Dean was disappointed by that because his perfect heaven would have Cas in it" just makes me all the more convinced that the final episode was some kind of djinn dream. Like.... There's no other explanation in my opinion. If Dean's perfect heaven was supposed to have Cas, and he tragically gets faked out by Jimmy (????? Why tf would jimmy be there anyway), it just proves that it's not ACTUALLY heaven. That, along with he El Sol beer he's drinking is all the evidence I need. I think after 15x19, Dean and Sam got whammied by some monster, and are stuck in a hallucination, and that's what we're seeing. (My headcanon is that it's actually The Empty doing it, because it knows if it doesn't keep Dean and Sam occupied and spinning in circles, they'll invade the Empty to save Cas. So its trying to prevent that) :)
Hello, anon friendo! I am gonna start by offering the socially distanced version of a high five, because yeah... There is just so much to unpack here, and you provided such a succinct and all-encompassing series of statements to start from. Thank you!
*flings open array of questionable suitcases*
First off, Congrats on having rejected the finale. I know a lot of folks are still struggling with that one, for many reasons. But you have hit upon so many of the points I’ve been trying to make about the finale since it aired. I’d just like to start with some of the assumptions I’ve heard from folks about the finale that make it impossible for me to consider it fully honestly canon. Because so much about it just makes no goshdang sense... like... not at all...
One of the biggest issues I have surrounding the reception of the finale in parts of fandom is that it portrayed a “happy ending.” The show itself spent the entire final season telling us that a gravestone marked Winchester was not and never would be a happy ending (thank you Becky Rosen-- words I never thought I’d say, but honestly and most sincerely meant). Let’s break this down a bit.
Starting from the assumption that “heaven was fixed” so that characters could have true free will there, making it satisfying in any way that Dean died so young and never got to truly experience happiness during life, I would like anyone who has adopted this attitude to then explain Kansas the band. I mean... explain that in any satisfactory canon-compliant way. (hint: you can’t. it makes zero sense in canon, if heaven is truly reformed and “happy” with everyone in possession of free will.)
Which brings me to Misha’s comments about Jimmy being in the Roadhouse. Why, if heaven were truly fixed, would Jimmy ever in a bazillion years attend a party for Dean Winchester? If Heaven were truly a “happy” ending for Dean, why introduce this element of eternal tragedy and heartbreak to his heaven experience? Why taunt him with the eternal loss of Cas-- even if you don’t think he reciprocated Cas’s romantic feelings, he was canonically the best friend Dean ever had, and being forced to exist forever in a place where he had everyone else he ever cared for except for Cas? Is frankly horrific.
How the actual fuck is that a happy ending, in any sense of the word?
How is this the sort of heaven that Dean would’ve made for himself before it was “fixed?” At least in the memorex heaven, he could’ve lived in oblivious peace with Cas, even if it was always just his own memories and not ~actually Cas~. I honestly think that would’ve been happier than the abject tragedy of what we did get, and what we would’ve gotten had the original script played out.
All of this kind of makes me wonder if they ever even actually defeated Chuck. Like... it feels more like Dean got pulled into the Empty at that moment with Cas and Billie, and everything else after that point was the Empty’s endless experience of sorrow and despair we knew it subject its charges to. So that’s one potential for what could’ve actually happened. I mean, everything about the finale was sorrow and despair, you know? Dean didn’t even get to enjoy his pie at a pie festival because Sam smashed in in his face. How is any of it happy, in any way?
Because if that was actually heaven, there wasn’t actually any free will (because why tf would Kansas the band have chosen to put on that concert? why tf would Jimmy have been there, just to torment Dean with the taunt of Cas returning to him only to have that hope snatched away again? It’s cruel. It’s, in fact, a source of intense despair).
The djinn theory could also work, and I’ve read some excellent fix-it fic using that as a premise. But that doesn’t really explain what happened to Jack (and Amara, since she was in there with them) after hoovering up Chuck’s power, you know? I think the simplest explanations in canon are that Chuck actually won via the unified power of Light and Dark being transferred into Jack and effectively using him as a vessel. With Sam and Dean convinced they’d won, they effectively stopped resisting Chuck’s story for them, and using Jack’s understanding of humanity and the Winchesters specifically, Chuck finally was able to implement a version of his story that the Winchesters would just waltz into without thinking it was supernaturally influenced at all. Going bigger and bigger with monsters and cosmic troubles hadn’t worked, but going so small Sam and Dean would barely even notice the influence-- even with the incongruous reappearance of a vampire that appeared in their lives once, for like two whole minutes 15 years ago, and an unsolved case from the journal from more than 30 years ago that John had never even linked to vampires at all.
At this point, I need to mention that I’m watching 10.23 as I type this up. An episode in which we confront the Mark, along with Death, and Dean’s despair, where he learns a version of the truth (but by no means the full truth, or even accurate truth in some respects) about Chuck’s Story, Amara/The Darkness, etc. That would unfold more fully over the next five seasons. And what was the case Dean took in this episode? Vampires. LOLOL omg this show is nothing if not horrifically consistent, yes?
So because of this, I went haring off through my own blog looking for a post I made a long time ago about the symbolism of how various monsters are used on this show (because again, consistency). I got sidetracked by other posts in my monsters tag, including this from after 15.09 aired, which feels particularly awfully relevant. This was my reaction to Chuck’s Story he showed Sam in that episode, about what the future would look like should he successfully trap Chuck with a Mark, and which... yeah is basically exactly thematically consistent with what we saw in the finale, right down to a cheesy twist on vampires. Read the whole post right here, but this is the part that reached up and punched me in the face:
this is how Dean personally reacts when he loses Cas. We know how he reacts when he loses anyone else– think about what he did when Charlie died. He went on a murder rampage against the Stynes for killing her. When Mary died he broke some furniture and went full bore toward both resurrecting her and stopping Jack. But without Cas, Dean loses the will to fight. Sam has… always been different. He referenced Jess in 15.04 to remind us of how he was after she died in the pilot episode. Just like John, he picked up the revenge mission and ran with it. But for Dean, Cas is different. Without Cas… Dean gives up.
Because... Dean gave up. Sure, he and Sam weren’t overrun by vampires in the end. Chuck knew they’d never stop fighting the monsters, one way or another. The only way to get Dean to give up is something Chuck hadn’t quite figured out yet... maybe not until after 15.17, after confronting Cas in the hallway of the bunker, after absorbing Amara’s power, knowledge, and perspective on Dean.
Chuck needed Dean to give up, and honestly? Pushing Billie to clear him off the table and send him (and Cas, that pesky angel who never did what he was told) to the Empty would’ve been a direct way to deal with that... pretty much akin to having one sibling locked in a cage forever, yes?
Also, still looking through my monsters tag, I’m reminded of 14.15, and still cannot differentiate the version of Heaven in 15.20 from what was done to the people of that town. This... is not... paradise. This is actively what Dean has been insisting is the OPPOSITE of paradise since like… 4.22… No ending where Dean was a “Stepford bitch in paradise” ever had the possibility of being “happy,” at the core of things, and this “fixed” version of Heaven just doesn’t hold up to any degree of inspection. Something is seriously wrong here. https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/183465650390/so-can-we-talk-about-this-monster-of-the-week-for
And since I was unable to find the post I wrote who knows how long ago about Monsters and how they’re symbolically used on Supernatural to represent larger themes in the episode, I’ll just attempt to sum up what Vampires have been used for. Revenge. Vampires are always, in some way connected to themes of revenge.
(and hooray, I found at least a post adjacent to the one I’ve spent the last four hours trying to find... https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/187207052080/i-obviously-did-not-think-this-through, where I mention that shapeshifters are about revealing hidden truths (mostly about Dean since most shapeshifters are connected to Dean), zombies are about grief and the inability to move past it.)
So why... why at the end of their road is the monster that comes after them-- literally FOR REVENGE for something that had never been blamed on Sam or Dean to begin with, from season 1, directly connected to John’s revenge mission and the first time they learned about the Colt AND the first time they learned in canon that Vampires were even real... like... this feels very specifically like some kind of layers-of-meta levels of shade on them, you know? Vampires are for revenge, so what vengeance exactly is being visited upon Sam and Dean in this episode? If not Chuck’s entire story for them itself?
So yeah, 100% agree, something is incredibly rotten in the finale. And I am sick to effing death of people trying to convince us that anything about this was “good” or “happy” or “satisfying” in any way. Or even “how it was always supposed to end” with Dean dead bloody, as if the entire back half of the series hadn’t been suggesting that a true win was the subversion of all of Chuck’s story for them, and Dean finally being able to have his chosen family all alive, happy, and chilling on a beach somewhere watching the sunset. Nothing will ever convince me that the ending portrayed in 15.20 wasn’t exactly how Chuck thought he “won,” rendering it entirely irrelevant to the rest of canon, unless all of canon was ultimately the tragedy we’d been encouraged to believe would be firmly defeated in the end.
Folks, you can’t have it both ways.
#spn 15.20#chuck's process#if this was the 'happy' ending for dean they sure did fail big time to make it actually happy!#it makes me feel sick thinking that dean's happy heaven ending was more like an eternal pit of torment#like actively tormenting him and taunting him with the fact that cas was truly gone forever#like wow they went all the fuck out to make it clear that even in heaven#dean would never be allowed to respond to cas's declaration of love#like... it's the most hurtful and hateful thing the show could possibly have done to us#and it still fucks me up knowing there's people who think this heaven was a 'good' ending for dean#like... fuck that entirely and with extreme prejudice#i feel like i have not been emphatic enough about my absolute hatred for this episode in these tags#but sadly there are limitations to expressing the actual feelings i'm feeling in the english language#sometimes the only effective word for these feelings involves velociraptor screeching#Anonymous
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That Kind of Love Never Dies_Chapter 1
Hey guys, Now that more voted to split my fictions in 2 parts, I'm back with the first part. I hope you like it. Don't forget to leave me feedbacks. I'll always appreciate them. Love you all.
This is for writing event @tvdspngirl314
My quote is "That kind of love never dies"
Dean x Reader series (just 2 parts)
This chapter words: ~5k
Series warning:
Angst, fluf, smut, angry Dean, hurt Reader, hurt Dean, there's some more but I hate spoilers so I insist on "Angst & Hurt"
It all started with a stupid argument at home. What was it? Three months ago? Sam couldn't remember the exact date but after years, it was the first time this awkward coldness between Dean and Y/n had started to build. He could remember the first time he and his brother came across Y/n like it was yesterday, they were hunting a very nasty creature who used to kidnap young and lonely women at night, then got them wrapped in ropes and ties on a bed in a warehouse to rape, torture and feed on their blood until the victim either died or accepted to turn into one of his kind.
Sam could remember the helplessness in people's eyes too. The pain of the victims' families, the frustration and anger on cops' faces when no one could find the criminal yet, even after the sixth missing girl.
"Sammy, he just kidnapped another girl. And I think I know where he's gonna take her. Let's hunt this son of a bitch."
When Dean was saying that, Sam never expected him to fall in love with the woman they would save that night. Well, unfortunately they weren't fast enough to prevent any harm to the girl. When they arrived and Dean killed the nasty creature, Y/n was almost dead. The monster had already raped her, tortured her … and when he felt the hunters enter the place, he drank almost all of her blood, to gain more energy to fight. So as always, Dean was up to blaming himself. Of course only in his own eyes, not anyone else's.
"Call Cas to come home. Tell him it's an emergency."
Dean told his brother when he finally could get Y/n out of those ropes. And Sam knew he was right. At that point, no one could save Y/n unless God or his angels. Maybe she was not so lucky coming across a nasty supernatural creature like that but she was lucky enough that Cas arrived just on time and healed her. However, angels can only heal physical wounds. But Y/n was hurt much more than that. She couldn't just move on from the things that the bastard had put her through. Even after Cas tricked her brain to forget some certain things, she still had bad nightmares and had this dark shade of hopelessness in her eyes. Soon, she started to eat and talk less and less. And Dean just couldn't let her go. He really wanted to fix all of that for her but she kept shutting him out… until the depression hit her. It was so bad that Cas felt the need to tell them to prepare themselves for her death. Because after all those days and unlike everything else in their lives, The Winchesters were already used to her presence around them; like the way a lonely person can get used to a wounded cat more and faster than anyone else.
"I'm not gonna hunt until I'm sure she can live her normal life." When Dean stated that, Sam really thought he was joking. But after a few days he started to believe it. Dean truly would do anything to keep her alive. From cooking vegetables to laughing at his own dad jokes in front of Y/n to make her smile. That was when Sam started to feel that they can be more than a random hunter/rescued victim relationship! It felt like his brother had finally found his motivation in life: "Saving Y/n."
Gradually Y/n started to respond to this special attention from Dean with trust and smiles. Soon they became a power couple that could motivate each other so easily that sometimes Charlie would call them out. And honestly Sam had no problem with it. In fact Y/n had become his other sister.
"My God, Dean! You're burning up!" It was two day after a werewolf hunt in which Dean had got hurt. At first it was just some scratches on his arms and chest. Yet as the time passed, more symptoms started to appear: headache, pain, fever, cold sweat, even nose bleeding and before they could figure it out, Dean fell unconscious. Apparently the claws of the werewolf were poisonous. However Sam wasn't sure. The only thing he got no doubts about was the fact that it was already too late. Dean couldn't make it to the hospital. So either Sam had to do anything possible to save him or Cas should've picked up his God damn phone.
"No. no, no, no, no. Dean … Dean!!!"
That was when Sam got to hear Y/n's helpless cry and see her true feelings. She was already in love with his brother.
Luckily, unlike typical love stories; no one died that night. Sam's antidote worked. And Dean opened his eyes an hour later.
"Sammy … Y/n?" As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Y/n grabbed his face and put her thirsty lips on her beloved hunter's, letting the tears stream down on her face… and then his.
"Never do that again." She begged, breaking the kiss, her trembling hands holding Dean's face so she could look into his eyes.
Sam couldn't stop his smile remembering how cute they were. Y/n literally had Dean wrapped around her little finger, to the point he accepted to teach her how to hunt and soon she was part of their team too. Until … a few months ago. After two years of them being constantly close to each other, Sam could tell something was off when Dean started to go out without eating breakfast with Y/n. Of course she got suspicious after the third time and that was when their endless arguments started.
"Why don't you just tell me what's wrong?"
"Because nothing is wrong, Y/n."
Actually there was. Something was VERY wrong. Anyone could tell that just by the change in Dean's eyes whenever he wanted to look at Y/n. Day by day he was getting more quiet and cold. Now they didn't even eat pie together or watch movies late at night. And Sam couldn't ignore his brother being grumpy or drunk on hunts, not anymore.
"Ok man, I've had enough. You either tell me what's wrong with you or next time I won't make any excuses so you can leave Y/n out of our hunt plans. I'm serious, Dean, I'll tell her the truth." He finally said, when they were alone in the impala, on their way to do their next hunt.
"She wants more."
"More?"
"Yeah. Sometimes it's like she sees more in me. She thinks we can have a different life. There's no need for any saying, I can see it in her eyes whenever we accidentally come across some family at a diner that try to feed their kids or people's wedding photos whenever we go to talk with some witnesses or whoever during the research! Sometimes she even looks up wedding dresses or kid stuff on the net!" Dean blew his anger out of his nostrils and sighed, shaking his head.
"Wow." Sam couldn't find the proper word to say but he couldn't hide his surprised face either.
"What?" Dean gave him an annoyed look.
"I mean …" Sam chuckled. "… are you telling me you're actually angry with her for imagining the things you always dream about?!"
"Sam …"
"No, really. I'm just curious. What's wrong with you, man?" Sam asked genuinely, waiting for an answer.
"What's wrong with me?! You think something is wrong with me just because I'm the rational one in this relationship; who's actually able to see the difference between a dream and the reality?"
Yeah, anyone could take that earnest speech, but not Sam. He'd seen and knew enough about his brother.
"What's the reality? Aren't you and Y/N living that dream life already?"
"What?! No. No … that's not the same." Dean shook his head.
"Really? How is it not? It's been two years, Dean. You two are constantly with and/or around each other. Always worried when the other one is in trouble and still looking at one another like there is nothing in the world that can make you happy as much as this relationship. So … excuse me if I won't buy your pretty speech; man ." Sam said, Rolling his eyes.
"Ok, let's say you're right but ... is it gonna be like that forever? With all the supernatural crap that we have to take care of … and the constant danger and chaos in this hunter life we have… I …"
"You what?" Sam asked when Dean didn't finish his sentence. He was lost in his thoughts, staring at this unknown point in the depth of the road. Finally he blew out his despair.
"I just can't let her fall for the things I know I can't provide for her. It's not fair, Sammy. It's not fair to lock her up in this dark life with me just because she loves me … especially while I know there is a whole bright future out there waiting for her."
"Here we go, the old Dean's self-doubt" Sam thought to himself as he took a deep breath before finding the best words to wake his brother up from this nightmare
"Yeah, I know but I don't think it's your call. If Y/n wants to go to hell with you instead of living in heaven with someone else, it's her choice. Not your responsibility. Right?"
Dean shook his head while his lips curved up a little to fake a smile but he never answered or said anything about that conversation ever again. He kept his silence for like three weeks … until someone new showed up: "Gary Smith". A tall man with the most stylish haircut and the most perfect teeth and smile.
They saw him for the first time at their hangout bar, as the new bartender who almost jumped in Y/n's way as soon as they entered the bar.
"Oh my God, bunny! Is this really you?" He said, pulling her in his embrace. Like she was the long time missing piece of his beloved puzzle!
"Bonny? You're wrong. Her name is Y/n." Dean said, pretty annoyed by the way Gary tightened his arms around Y/n's little shoulders, making him chuckle.
"No, uh … it's just a nickname." Y/n said as soon as the guy let her go.
"Yeah, actually the most fitting nickname that I could think of. I mean … you have to agree. She got the most cute little ears in the world." The guy explained, chuckling and pulling on her little star earring. Well, if Sam wanted to be honest, he had to agree with him. He never paid any attention to it before but now that Gary mentioned it, he could tell Y/n's ears were truly small.
"I see … So … I guess this means you were close friends?" Dean said, already hating the way Y/n e's blushed with hearing her old nickname.
"Uh … well, no. Actually more than that." The guy grinned, ruffling his own hair while he was awkwardly laughing and looking at Y/n. Just like a proud embarrassed teen!
"We used to date." Y/n said.
*oh* Sam tried his best not to let that stupid grin sit on his lips but Dean's frown and his sudden heavy silence didn't let him do so.
"Yeah. We are kinda each other's first. Like … you know? prom date." The man added, giving Y/n a wink while Dean's gaze was still locked on his large arm around her shoulders.
"Yeah. It's been years, Gary."
"I know. But believe me, bunny. you still look the same." He said, bending to put a kiss on her right cheek.
Dean would kill him. Sam just knew that. Because his brother's eyes were already burning with jealousy.
"By the way, don't you wanna tell me who these gentlemen are ?" The guy asked Y/n, giving her his softest smile.
"Of course. This is Sam and this is Dean. My colleagues who are my friends now. I live in their place."
After they met, everything got even more complicated. Y/n, the girl who was still trying to get old-happy-days Dean back suddenly stopped whatever she used to do. No more complains, no waiting at nights to see Dean before going to bed, no more effort to get involved in hunts, no nothing. And despite what Dean had claimed before, it was making Dean even more frustrated. Day to day he and Y/n were getting colder towards each other and there was nothing he could do to fix it. That was what made him even more furious. Sam already knew all of that and he still had to live with both of those grumpy faces. So last night when they began to fight, he could see this was coming: Y/n left the bunker after Dean let some hurtful things out of his mouth, just because he didn't know how to deal with all the heartache anymore. He now was convinced that Y/n didn't love him anymore. Yet the next day after drinking whatever strong drink they had, he begged Sam to come with him. Apparently Jodie texted Dean about Y/n being in her place for that night. Just to make sure that her crazy step son won't sell his soul over a tracking spell! So Dean almost begged his brother to be there with him, cause Dean believed that as much as Y/n didn't care about him, she still respected Sam and cared about him. Like a little sister and her elder brother.
So here they were, In Jodie's living room, in front of her and Y/n.
"Considering your sleepy eyes, I think we caught you at bed time, huh?" Sam asked, checking Y/n's obvious eye bags.
"Who says that? I'm totally good, Sam."
She said with a small smile, looking much more in control and stronger than before. So Sam knew it was a lie. Y/n Just had made her peace with what had happened last night. The realization۹ kicked Dean in the gut. Y/n always used to be stronger and bolder when she got hurt.
"I'm gonna make some coffee for us. Why don't you guys take a seat till I come back?"
Jodie interrupted, to ease the heavy and sharp silence that suddenly had fallen over all of them.
Y/n gave her a smile.
"Of course."
It was so fake. Her smile didn't even curl her lips completely. She was still badly hurting.
Sam swore in his head when he looked over his brother who sank silently into the nearest seat at the end of the table like a broken shell that he was too . One of Dean's hands was in the pocket of his jacket, the other formed a fist on the table. Sam was sure Dean knew it too. He knew everything was almost past saving. "Almost". Sam tried to stick to their small chance.
"So …" He cleared his voice before he put some (semi fake) hope into his words."You're … you're gonna come back home today or did Alex and Claire made you promise them otherwise?" He laughed and tried to make it funny but the truth was he asked this for Dean's sake, knowing he already was struggling to find the words … to let Y/n know how much he wanted her back … to ask her to come back.
"To be honest … I don't think I can live in the bunker anymore." Y/n said and as Dean's head snapped up to look at her in horror, she raised her hand to stop his (likely) protests.
"I applied for a job 3 weeks ago and to my surprise they called me this morning to tell me I'd actually got it."
*What?*
No one had to ask it. The question was already hung in the air. She snored mockingly in her nose. "Perfect timing, right?"
She moved her gaze from her interlocked fingers on the table to Dean's eyes.
He didn't answer, he didn't move but he got tense. Still staring back at Y/n.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Sam asked, once again saving Dean from asking the question he was itching to ask with some other words that for sure couldn't be nice.
"I wanted to but I didn't think I could actually get it and even if I did, I never figured out how to tell you. Besides, I never considered the "move out" option before..." She looked at Sam for a second before she turned her gaze on Dean. "... But I actually appreciate that you bring it up. I think now I can take the advice. I'm gonna move on."
Sam's heart dropped in his stomach when he heard those words. Because he knew what this meant. It felt something like having to watch Dean get stabbed in the heart.
"Is this … because of that Bartender?" Dean asked, staring deadly at Y/n with his bloodshot eyes. He was already chewing on his bottom lip. And Sam knew a heavy storm was on its way to hit them.
"I don't want to answer that question."
*shit*
"Why? Because you can't just simply say no?" Dean scolded and Sam could see how it pushed on Y/n boundaries.
"No. Because it's not your fucking business and it's not Gary's business either. But at least he knows his limits."
*well, fuck*
"By "limits" you mean when he drools on you just because for God knows whatever the reason, you started to wear leather jackets when we go there?"
"WHAT?!"
*Oh, fuck* Sam thought to himself, watching Y/n rise from her seat.
"You think … you really think that I …" she laughed nervously and Sam could tell she would punch Dean in the face if she wasn't a sweet, super nice person.
"How you can even …"
"I can even what, Y/n? Are we now going to pretend like I'm a blind man who can't see how you got attracted to your ex again? Did you really think I couldn't see how your hands were shaking when his filthy face lighted up by seeing you for the first time after all these years?"
Sam wanted to interrupt him or at least leave the room but everything was happening so fast.
"So what? Why and since when you care about my private life?"
"Since you stopped drinking bunker's beers just because you rather drink those crappy poisonous cocktails he makes at the bar!"
Dean was on his feet now as well. And despite his will, Sam couldn't stop his smile. He never saw his brother this jealous before. It was fun.
"Poisonous? … You … of all people, you are the one who says this? cause as much as I know, you're the one who puts dormitives in my guest's food so the poor guy gets tired and can't spend his time with me!"
"Yeah, because your poor guy is not welcomed in MY PLACE!" Dean yelled, punching the table with so much power that made everyone almost jump out of their skins.
"Dean!" Finally Sam interrupted but as soon as he stood up, someone rang the doorbell and Sam could hear Jodie welcoming someone inside.
"Guys … I know it's not my place to interfere but you two really need to sort things out somewhere private … of course that's when both of you can be much calmer than this."
"No, we have nothing to say or to talk about, anymore. Your brother was clear enough when he said he wants me to move out, so I'll move out. And that's it."
Y/n declared, looking at Sam to resist any eye contact with Dean, probably to make him even more crazy.
"And that's it? You wanna ignore that part where you were too eager and ready to accept that suggestion and leave the bunker instantly like your pants were on fire?!"
Dean retorted while Y/n was shaking her head like she couldn't believe him.
"Whose pants are on fire?" Jodie interrupted as soon as she re-entered the room with the coffees she'd made, this time a man was with her. Y/n's guy. The famous bartender.
*Oh, No!*
Sam sighed, closing his eyes for a second so the guy couldn't read his face.
"Obviously not mine." Dean hissed through his teeth, looking first at the guy and then at Y/n with such a disappointment and rage that no one could ignore.
"Hey, what's wrong?" The guy asked, choosing the worst spot to stand on: right next to Y/n.
"My typical life I guess. Nothing's new." She mumbled in reply to him but her eyes were still on Dean.
"No, nothing is wrong with your life, Y/n. It's about your choices. That's what's wrong with you. As always." Dean said bitterly. As sharp as a knife, as cold as ice. Sam could see how it drained color from Y/n's face.
"You better watch your mouth, buddy." The Gary guy warned Dean and Sam could tell that if it wasn't for the sudden thud sound that stole everyone's attention, Dean would throw a fight right there. But …
"Y/n!" Jodie almost screamed. Y/n was laying on the floor, seemingly unconscious.
"Oh, God." Sam said as Jodie rushed to her.
"Y/n? … Y/n can you hear me?"
As she sat next to her, Gary's fingers already were on Y/n's carotid pulse point. So Sam couldn't stop himself from looking up at his brother, who was still standing where he was. In shock.
"Oh, shit!" Gary's worried voice made Sam check Y/n's pale face again but Jodie was the one to dare ask the question which was on everyone's minds.
"What? What's wrong?"
"Her pulse ... too faint." He said before turning to Dean: "Is she bleeding?"
"Bleeding?" Dean blinked and mumbled in confusion.
If it was up to Sam, he'd ask *What bleeding?* & *Why are you asking this from my brother?*
"Oh my. You still don't know. Do you?" Gary sneered.
"Know what? What's happening?" Jodie was freaking out now and Sam actually felt the same. He didn't like the way this stranger pretended like he knew her better than them. However what happened next was much more unexpected. And … rude!
To everyone's surprise, the guy reached out to Y/n's jeans and drew his hand between her legs but before anyone could react, he spread her legs open so it could be possible for everyone to see that big red stain there. Then he raised his hand. It was all wet and red in blood!
"She's having a miscarriage." He revealed.
Sam's gaze instantly caught Dean's ... Burning. Dean was burning inside with his heavy silence.
"Don't you worry. It's not mine." Gary added more fuel to that hell with such a mocking tone, staring right back at Dean's eyes.
Now Sam could feel it. The storm was there: rising in his brother's roar!
Before Sam could've moved any muscles, Gary was already pinned to the wall, Dean's hands on his now-ripped-out collar.
"Dean, no!" Sam jumped in, trying to catch his brother's arm before his fist make any contact with the guy's nose but all he could do was changing the direction of the punch which landed on Gary's shoulder, making a painful cracking sound.
"I said no … Dean, stop it." Sam had to literally cage Dean in his arms so the furious man couldn't tear Gary apart.
"Get off me, Sam. This son of a bitch has to learn his place."
"Enough!" As Dean just broke himself free, Jodie's scream stopped everyone in their tracks.
"It's enough!" Jodie warned all three men, pointing at them one by one.
"You want to fight? Not here. Not in my house!"
"But ..."
As soon as Dean opened his mouth to protest, Jodie cut him:
"And you … you should know Y/n is pregnant with your twins. So … you'll be a responsible man who will try his best to save them or you can get the hell out of here and never come back!"
"What?" Sam was too shocked to suppress his reaction while Dean couldn't even find any words to say. His confused look darted between Jodie's face and Y/n's figure while his parted lips kept moving without making any noise, just like a dying fish on the shore!
"I promised her not to tell anyone but it was a promise under normal conditions, not this." Jodie sighed, struggling to keep her emotions under control. Sam saw the worry in her frown. Like a real mother, worried for her children. However it was nothing in comparison to his brother's blank eyes and pale face.
"Dean, It's ok. We just need to take her to hospital. … it's ok, man. I promise."
He had to grab Dean by his jacket, as his brother was struggling to process all of these in his head.
"Come on, man. We got no time. Do I need to do this alone or you'll …"
"Get the car, Sammy."
It was just a simple sentence. Yet it had enough power to make Sam's heart sank. Since Dean had put the car keys in his hand saying that, Sam couldn't stop thinking about that tone. Dean never had called Baby a "car" In years. And Sam had never heard that crack in his voice since their Dad's death.
"You ok?" He finally let himself ask, two hours after they arrived at the hospital.
"I want to be." Dean closed his eyes and put his head against the cold wall, letting the dim light to darken the shadows under his eyes.
"I'm sure she'll be good. She's strong, Dean. You know that."
He smiled and Sam looked away not to watch him. He knew that smile. Dean used to give him that, whenever everything was gone so wrong that Dean couldn't promise him anything good. Like when both of them were still kids. Hungry, cold and all alone in a rusty motel room where John had left them on their own for a one day long hunt but then a heavy snow had crashed the roads and kept them apart for half a week. So Dean had to wash the dishes and do the laundry in the motel to rent the room for another day and provide some snacks so they wouldn't starve to death. But after three days, the hotel managers didn't want them to be around. And Sam could vividly remember that smile on his brother's face when he asked: *Where should we go then?*
"You were always such a father material. You know?"
Sam admitted with a broken smile on his face.
"You were always responsible, kind and caring with me as a kid. And I can't imagine anyone who deserves to be a father more than you."
Dean took a deep breath and opened his eyes without looking at him: "But I don't want ... I really can't, Sammy."
All, it certainly wasn't the response Sam had expected. He used to believe that Dean would never turn down any chance to start a family with Y/n. Especially after everything in the world was back to normal.
"Are you kidding me? You always wanted this."
"No …" Dean finally turned his gaze to meet his brother's confused eyes. "No, Sammy. Not like this. I don't want to raise another kid without his mom. I'm not that strong anymore."
Dang. Once again Sam's heart dropped in his stomach. Dean was really helpless.
"Mr. Winchester?"
Dean was on his feet as Sam just realized the doctor's presence.
"It's me."
Sam prayed for any good news as doctor took a glance of Dean and fixed his glasses on his face …
"To be continued …"
READ CHAPTER 2 HERE
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The next and also ultimate chapter will post on Sunday, April 25. Thanks for reading.
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#dean x reader#dean winchester x reader#dean x ofc#dean x you#dean winchester#allyswritingevent#Acklesterritory#dean winchester x ofc#dean x y/n#dean winchester x you
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I NEED TAKEMARU DAD HC, TADATOMO AND XOLOTLS WERE SO GOOD
SO, FIRST OF ALL: THANK YOU, DEAR ;0; I'M SO HAPPY YOU ENJOYED THEM-
AND SECONDLY: Y'all- this has been fucking sitting as a WIP in my google docs for so fucking long- I have so many others too. Like, Claude, Zab, Jacob- ALL THE TEACHERS ARE IN THERE- Hakuman, Durga, Babylon- uuuuuuhhh, fuuuuckiiiiin' TANGAROA. HOMBRE'S IN THERE AND TETSU AND NOMAD-
FUck- I just, there's a lot fjsdlkjlskdjs
ANYWAY! Under the cut for length because this- ah,,,, this is a big boy-
THIS DUDE HAS BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR ALL HIS LIFE- HE’S SO READY TO START A FAMILY WITH YOU
You two planned this out- like, in depth have planned this out because first of all, the dude made it very clear, in the beginning of your relationship, that he was in it for the long haul and he wanted a family with you, like, a horde of children. But after he made your guys’ house and you two established yourselves first
Which, spoiler, you both did all that, so now it’s either baby making time or adoption time
You guys probably end up with a huge ass family, and I’m not joking when I say that, because five children is big. But you know what, that’s better than the 15 (especially if you have to birth that many- like, oof) he was trying to sell you on tbh
Like, shit- this man wore a suit and made a powerpoint to try and convince you why 15 was the golden number, to which you responded that you’d like to have a retirement one day. He couldn’t really fight you there
But your kiddos end up being an oldest girl and the rest boys- which he loves his girl so much, she tries her hardest to keep the boys in line
WHICH WORKS TO VARYING DEGREES TBH
She’s so soft spoken and shy and they’re all… rough and tumble little gremlins
Speaking of the babies, she’s probably older than the youngest by five years; the oldest boy is a year younger than her; the second oldest boy is two years younger than him; and from there, you had the third boy a year from the second and finally the fourth boy a year from the third- (I had to literally do math to make sure I was right on that jsl;kfdjdfslk)
ANYWAY
You’re guys’ baby girl??? Absolute angel, but she had a lot of anxiety as a baby so she had to be held by one of you guys or she would whimper and cry- not even a loud cry, but a heart broken one??? It just- UGH-
The first time Takemaru heard her whimper, he just about sobbed with her- it really didn’t help that she was trying to get out of the blanket she was swaddled in, so she was rocking back and forth on her back, so he could see her little fingers push and pull at the fabric- he forgot all about the bottle he was trying to make for her and picked her up and held her so close in his hands-
He was wide-eyed and terrified he was going to break her as he just held her, but he didn’t and her sniffles died down and she sighed against his neck (he really cried there- but you never heard that shhh)
Kurogane became the favorite uncle when he gave you guys a personalized baby carrier for a little get together to celebrate her birth (they have one for all of the babies too!)
You and Kuro just about jumped when Take wrapped his arms around the man in near tears
But then the title was revoked and presented to Heph instead because the man hand sewed this little stuffed pegasus, his fingers all bandaged and he had this nervous smile on his face as he handed it to your little girl, who LAUGHED AND MADE GRABBY HANDS FOR IT???? When I say that you’ve never seen Takemaru shove a man away and bring another one into a hug so fast (Heph looked fucking constipated as soon as the impact happened- you almost cackled at the pure offence on his face)- you mean it
Kurogane was sprawled on the floor staring blankly at the ceiling until you went up and asked him if he was alright; his reply was raising his fist and declaring “This is war!”
And thus, the story of how your baby girl ended up with a horde of plushies, that she refuses to get rid of to this day began
You have yet to tell them that her favorite uncle is actually Amatsumara- you guys can rest assured that he is the go to babysitter for her because she clings just as hard to him as she does to you guys (no, you two aren’t a little jealous, what makes you think that-)
When you’re first boy is born- you two are not prepared for the mass chaos that is held in his little body- he is an absolute gremlin
You don’t even know how- Takemaru blames you; you are offended
He’s such a needy baby and he cries constantly- and then he laughs when he knocks something out of one of your guys’ hands
You two love him to death- you swear
His sissy tries to help since you two keep her right next to you when your tending to your little boy- always giving her head pats or nodding along when she softly coo about something- but, there’s only so much a one year old can do to help
But she really tries her hardest
It’s easier for all three of you when the next boy comes along because he’s exactly like your oldest boy was and your girl has aged a little bit so she can do a tad bit more than when she was younger- not much, but still
Though your oldest boy brings his own bouts of problems to the table too because boy does he want to see how bouncy his brother is
You and Takemaru both dived to keep your oldest boy from using his little brother as a literal baby trampoline. Suffice to say, he got in trouble
By the time the last two are born/come in, you guys are basically baby experts- like, hot damn, you guys got everything lined up with zero hesitation and can read the boys like a damn book
You guys immediately know what they need/want without them even uttering a cry; your daughter has also picked up this skill and she takes care of the other two toddlers too, which helps you guys a whole bunch
Oh! Oh! You’re little girl really likes holding her baby brother- like, really likes to hold him and can hold him for hours on end
She’s very attached to him and Takemaru lives for it tbh
Though she loves all her brothers and her brothers all really love her too
When the boys are all toddler aged, they will literally work together to keep Takemaru from going to work by ganging up on him and clinging to his legs; little do they know is that their papa doesn’t have tree trunk legs for nothing- so he just walks, albeit with the funniest gait because of the four children clinging to both of his legs, and just goes about his morning until he gets to the door where he begins to pull them off with one hand and lift them up so he could plant a big ol’ kiss on their forehead and tell them that he loves them and he’ll see them when he gets home; the boys are all squealing in delight when this happens. You’re daughter will trail behind the fiasco while holding your hand and he’ll always hold open his arms for you and her to rush into his arms and hug him- and so he can also give you two forehead smooches uwu
When you guys need babysitters literally the Crafters are all for it, though Heph is a little nervous about it, but Talos is literally raring to go! He fucking loves kids!
Your girl loves Amatsu, as mentioned before; your oldest boy LOVES Musashi, they get into so much trouble together, though they both calmed down a bit after your little girl almost got hit in the head with a rock and Amatsu about hung them from their toes; your second and third oldest love watching Kurogane work, like, they will actively be asking him questions at rapid fire speed. It’s honestly amazing how he keeps up with their questions while he’s tinkering with whatever he project he’s working on this week; your youngest one is fascinated with Heph himself, he’ll always seek him out, usually hobbling to Talos and asking him if he could hang out with them and Talos is always quick to say yes. At first, Heph was really nervous about having him there but over time he started to get used to his presence (and this is technically his little brother right? He has to be nice to him!) and now he sits him on his lap so he can see what Heph is doing and he’ll even let him help with the smaller stuff in the project. It’s most likely gonna be with something harmless, like a little toy robot lion tbh
Sometimes they don’t want to give them back tbh
Takemaru almost threw hands with Musashi because he hid your oldest and refused to tell you guys where he was because “you aren’t taking away our little buddy, old chap!” Turns out you kiddo was just taking a nap inside of one of Musashi’s napping nooks-
By the time their tween years role around, the boys are bouncing off the walls and your little girl is trying so fucking hard to keep them under control
You swear you guys have white hairs from the boys specifically because your third oldest came
running in with his whole hand stuck in the pickle jar- you don’t even know how?????? Takemaru literally had to break it open because he couldn’t pull your kid’s damn hand out of the jar
Oml, puberty is a trip, especially when it happened to your oldest boy: you come into the living just to see your him sitting and staring at the fire in the fireplace, looking like he saw something horrific and so, like the good mama/papa/nano you are, you come and put a comforting hand on his shoulder and ask: “honey, what’s wrong?”
To which this little shit replies in the most distraught voice: “My balls look like moss balls.”
You sit, blinked, and had to let it sink in with what he meant, when you heard a horrified gasp from behind you and you turned to see your husband covering your daughter's ears. “WE DON’T TALK ABOUT THOSE THINGS IN FRONT OF THE LADY/LADIES, YOUNG MAN.”
“BUT THEY DO, DAD! IT’S TERRIBLE- THEY’RE SO ITCHY-”
You had drowned out the conversation by that point and from the look on your daughters face- she has too
Your other three are much more… calm? About the whole ordeal; at the very least they’re not loud like their older brother is about it
Your daughter is the chillest with it, she reads a lot of books so she kinda pieced together what was happening of her own accord
The boys all cackle together when their voices crack and have made a whole game about who’s voice could crack the most
They all like to tinker with things thanks to Takemaru and the other Crafters influences! Your daughter is into intricate things, like limbs and the likes; your oldest son is into metal work, especially with swords; your second and third are both really interested in making little rockets; and your youngest is fascinated with robots because Talos and Orihime are so cool?????? Oml???
So you two got a horde of brainiacs and you’re so proud of them
By the time they’re in high school, your daughter is already wracking up scholarships for her little inventions and essays on her observations. Your boys are taking it a bit more slowly than their sister is, but that doesn’t meant that your oldest boy isn’t selling his metal works for a good price, and your two middle sons are already piecing together a little shop of their own (with dad’s help- Take’s pretty good with money and budgeting), and you’re youngest has really been brushing up on robotics! He studies under Uncle Heph and Uncle Talos and it’s super fucking cute??????
Heph is suprisingly good at teaching (despite him swearing that he’s not) and your little boy just soaks up the information like a fucking sponge.
One thing that they all do together is ask Takemaru how to build things and work with wood and carpentry- you can bet your ass he shows them all the ropes of how to make a home. He even goes over electrical and plumbing work with them. You have so many videos and pictures of them working together and just learning by Takemaru’s example- it makes your heart swell with happiness and love.
God forbid your daughter ever gets a significant other because they have Takemaru, her three brothers, and the entirety of the Crafters (and you if you're an overprotective parent) to watch out for.
They get five different shovel talks in a span of three minutes. But, ultimately, she’s not dumb with her choices in partners, so they’re most likely good people. And you can rest easy with that knowledge.
When they graduate, there’s tears for each of their graduations. Takemaru pulls them into bone crushing hugs and blubbers about how broad he is of them and how they’ll still always be his little Onis (regardless of if they’re actually Onis or not). Your girl straight up sobs and hugs her dad back, her brothers piling in the group hug, crying just as hard. Your oldest boy is in hysterics when he graduates, and your last two boys tackle their papa in a hug and they go tumbling to the ground laughing and crying.
They don’t leave right away after high school and instead, all of them find a college/trade school close enough for them to go to and fro without having to leave the nest yet- which Takemaru has no issue with, he’s very much a tight-knit family type of man.
Having a family with Takemaru is the most domestic and tooth rotting sweetness you can ever ask for. And, at the end of the day, he’s just so grateful that you were willing to go on this journey with him.
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#tokyo afterschool summoners#housamo#takemaru#dad hcs#SFW#not a reblog#reader insert#x reader#non binary reader#gender nuetral reader#IT'S DONE#DAMN#HOLY SHIT#IT'S FUCKING DONE JSDLKFJSLDKFJ:LDF#I'm holding so many of these parents HCs captive oml sjfdlsjdflk#Anyway#Hope you enjoyed!
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