#and here i am grappling again lol

[thejilyship]

writing about car travel set in the uk is so strange. I'll be thinking okay, the distance between these two places is far and they're traveling by car. A long car ride for me would be at least three hours, but upwards of five before I'd add the word 'really' in front of long, right?

But in the UK people don't go on car rides for four or five hours, they wouldn't just do that. They would take a train or a plane, yeah? That's like a whole day of travel, and that's not what I'm intending it to be.

So then I'm like, alright, it's two hours. But is that still to much? I'll just say almost two hours so that some people can pretend that it's an hour and a half or traffic or whatever.

[arowyn-m]

Why Viktor Could Die in S2

“They won’t kill a champion because—“ okay just pause for a second and humor me. I’ve made a lot of arguments in the past about why every Arcane character is fair game but that’s not what I’m arguing here—I’m arguing from a narrative standpoint.

Viktor’s my favorite character in Arcane, but I believe him dying in the series finale is the most likely conclusion to his arc. Here’s why:

Viktor’s whole arc is about life and death as a concept—what really constitutes “living”? (Posed by the scenes with Rio) Why is a human life inherently valuable? (Posed by capitalizing on his aggressive need to leave a legacy) Which is more important—a person’s effect on the world around them or their effect on their loved ones? (Viktor realizing too late that Sky valued him not just for his output but for who he is)

There’s also a ton of foreshadowing to Viktor’s demise coming about by a fault in his technology or by the careless way he relates technology to human life (usually himself but not always), and it’s often disguised as humor (the “of course not” scene) or hidden behind false foreshadowing for death by illness (basically everything to do with the Hexcore in eps 5 and 6)

I’ve theorized about it on here before, but I believe at the end of the series the Hexcore will be destroyed (probably by Jayce, specifically to call back to the promise he made to Viktor), effectively ending the threat of the Void overtaking Piltover. Viktor will be so connected to the Hexcore by the finale that destroying it will kill him. He reaches his Glorious Evolution, yes, but it destroys him in the end.

And yeah there is merit to the “how can you live with yourself” kind of approach to ending a character’s story, but that conclusion has the strongest impact if the character’s arc is about learning to live with your mistakes. Most of the character arcs in this show pose that question, but Viktor’s arc really doesn’t?

As far as we can tell with Viktor so far, there’s very little grappling with that concept up until his last 5 or so minutes of screentime, and even then it’s more of a blip that resolves itself (“In pursuit of great, we failed to do good. We have to make it right.”) If Viktor’s story is about defining the respective values of “life” and “humanity” then the most bittersweet ending to his story would be by letting him die after briefly coming back to his humanity.

At the same time, in Ep 5 of BtR Alex Yee says this when talking through writing the script for S2:

“It’s, like, die or accept some things being imperfect. That would be the way that they could go back to humanity.”

So if we assume he’s talking about Viktor covertly here (he very well could be talking about some other character, but yk “going back to humanity” is a very Viktor-coded issue) we could also speculate that they may try to end Viktor’s arc with him accepting the Glorious Evolution just…doesn’t work. I hope that’s not the case because that kind of kills his whole shtick but anything’s possible lol.

To round off this thought by comparison—there’s no chance Jinx dies by the series finale because her whole character arc will inevitably move from “Am I Powder or am I Jinx?” to “Okay, I’m Jinx. How do I live in that identity with the knowledge of my past mistakes?” Her dying at the end of the series would be an unsatisfying conclusion to that question. Same thing with Vi. Vi’s arc was about trying to “fix” things. She just wanted things to go back to the way they were, and they just can’t. Her arc is probably going to be centered around her grappling with grief over losing Powder AGAIN and learning to accept things will never go back to how they were before. Caitlyn’s arc is going to be her exacting revenge and maybe living with regret and bitterness. None of those character arcs logically conclude with “and though they found the answer to their life’s question, they died.”

Viktor’s probably will.

Also here’s a link to a longer more in-depth theory I had a while ago—kind of a adjacent to this thought (for some reason it won’t work as an embedded link) https://www.tumblr.com/arowyn-m/755893249865039872/jayceviktorhexcore-situation-in-s2?source=share

[yukimiyaz]

THANKFUL

miya osamu x gn!reader

includes: bf osamu. afab!reader. smut lol. he uses a shit ton of pet names. he might have a bit of an oral fixation if you squint.

notes: old fic. wanted it here lol

You were just trying to bring your boyfriend lunch. 

Walking in with your sweet smile and warm eyes and the packed container that Osamu had left on the kitchen counter this morning from running late. Granted, he does work at his own restaurant, so it’s not like he would’ve gone hungry (or been ridiculed for his tardiness) but still. You know how fussy he gets when he is looking forward to a certain meal and you didn’t want his poor employees to have to be subjected to that. 

So in you came—like the absolutely great partner you are, regardless of what his brother (your annoyance) says—saving the day yet again with your boyfriend’s lunch in hand. 

And it was damn near sickening, how his eyes lit up the instant he heard that bell jingle and saw it was you, the immediate softening of his face as a smile spread across his lips. He was pouting too, so yeah, you really did save his poor employees.  

“Aw, baby. Ya didn’t have to do that,” he had cooed as you walked behind the counter to give it to him, letting him pull you into a big hug as he swayed you both side to side. 

(But the thankful, knowing look his cashier had given you only confirmed your suspicions as you returned the embrace and let him peck your lips). 

It was that same cashier that smiled at you both, waved you away, shooed you off. “You can go boss, don’t worry. I’ve got this covered. Rush time is over.” 

Now normally, it would take a bit more convincing for Osamu to leave one of his workers manning the front all by themselves. Normally, he’d wait until one of the others returned from their own lunch before he deserted them and took his own. Normally, he puts his boss priorities first by a smidge in situations like this. 

Normally, you don’t end up with your back arching off his hardwood desk with your muted moans echoing off his walls. 

“What. A fuckin’. Sweetheart ,” Osamu grunts, each word punctuated by the pistoning of his hips as his hands grip onto your waist.  

You grapple for him, for something, anything to hold onto as he mercilessly fucks into you. One hand wrapping around his wrist, the other trying to reach around his shoulders. He ruts into you again and you think you nearly bust your lip from how hard you’re biting it trying to keep your voice down. 

“I just—you left it—so I—” a gasp rips out of your throat as he shifts, the head of his dick brushing against that spot in you that makes you want to scream. Nails digging into his skin, mouth dropping open to pant an ungodly variance of his name.  

“You what?” he asks, and you fucking hate the way he sounds so collected when you’re literally losing your damn mind right here in his cramped office. “Thought about me, hm? Takin’ care of me, ain’t ya? My sweet baby.” 

He leans over you enough to steal a sloppy kiss from your parted lips, drinks in the sighs and breathy exhales you push out. His eyes catch yours, stone grey pinning you, as if his arms coming up to cage you weren’t enough. A calloused, familiar hand cups your jaw, grips it like he thinks you would even dare look away. 

“Yeah, my sweet fuckin’ baby,” he smirks in a way that has your stomach flipping ten times over, coil tightening up. “My turn to take care of you. Show you how fuckin’ thankful I am.” 

And you want to dismiss him or shush him or curse him or something. He didn’t even lock the fucking office door for Christ’s sake, and it’s too loud. You’re both way too loud, and you want to tell him that. Tell him that he needs to be quiet, needs to keep you quiet, because you don’t think you’d ever be able to face any of his employees again if you knew they could hear you right now. 

But all that comes out is a broken off moan into his mouth as his pace doubles. It’s hot in his office. You always berate him for not buying a fan, but you’re not too sure the lack of circulation is really what’s to blame for the heat this time as a rough hand slips between your bodies and the pad of a thumb presses to your clit. 

“Shh, shh, baby.” And oh, now he worries about your volume? “Don’t want them to hear me showin’ my thanks, d’ya?”  

His grip eases up a little on your jaw, just enough for him to slip his thumb up to rub against your bottom lip, tugging it down and letting it go. You can practically see the hearts in his eyes as he does it again, licking his own lips as he plays with yours. He’s always told you that you had a pretty mouth—when you were eating, talking, just sitting. You catch him staring, call him out just to watch him dopely smirk, listen to some cheeky remark he’ll give. 

Now, though, it seems like every bit of cheeky is drained from him as he darts his tongue out to lap into your mouth, seemingly forgetting to even pull his thumb away before doing so. 

If the chorus of thank yous he’s been spewing weren’t enough for you to get it, the ones he’s been quite literally drilling into you are. Your pussy flutters around him just barely, and that’s all the sign that he needs. His thumb on your clit speeds up, rubs patterns in a way you almost think could be the kanji for thank you as well. It’s what it feels like. Like every bit of him is exuding gratitude. Like he’s trying to engrain it into your pretty little brain one way or another. And you’re more than happy to help him. 

He pulls back with a string of spit connecting you, warm pants into your mouth and on your cheeks as his hips stutter and his eyes go a little hazy.  

“Fuck, fuck. C’mon sweetheart, cum f’me.”  

And he’s just so damn pretty, flushed and breathless above you, chest heaving just a bit with every rock of his hips. You don’t think you could deny him even if you wanted to, and for some reason you’re nodding. Your frazzled little head bobbing as you tug him closer, bring him down again, let his mouth muffle your cry of his name as your legs start to shake and your cunt clenches around his cock. And Osamu, he’s never been one to receive without giving, and the same applies to this moment now as he gives your pretty cunt a few more shallow thrusts until a new type of warmth is being shot into you. 

It’s static in the office for a few moments, staggered breaths and hammering heartbeats as the two of you stay pressed together. Slowly, Osamu raises his head up enough to look down at you again in his post-orgasmic glory, and with the look in his eyes you already want to kill him. 

“Did ya get the message? Or do we need to go another—” 

You shove his face away before he can even finish, rolling your eyes despite the slippery grin that spreads across your lips. And he just presses a kiss to your palm, giving it a lippy little bite when you try to shove him away the second time. 

You were just trying to bring your boyfriend lunch, but now you’re rushing out of his restaurant with a red face and messy hair, trying to get to your car before his cum starts to leak out too much. 

And pretending you didn’t see the look his poor cashier gave you as you ran out. 

[drewharrisonwriter]

On the Mend - Ch 4: Starting All Over Again

No Outbreak Joel Miller x Female Reader

Read this on AO3 | On the Mend Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Summary: Just as you and Joel are finding and settling into a new rhythm of cohabitating in the throes of your bed rest, the phone rings, suddenly disrupting the fragile peace.

Word count: 1,681

A/N: Hey everyone! Here is chapter 4 of On The Mend. Thank you for your patience, it has been a tough couple of months, but I am back and already halfway through the next part and really positive that I'll be able to post it almost right away lol Again, thank you for your DMs, I appreciate you all 💕

Tagging these wonderful people: @tuquoquebrute @vickie5446 @softiedingo @theoraekenslover for this update. If you want to be tagged for the next ones, just leave a comment ^_^

“Hurricane Miller”

"Hurricane Miller?" she repeated incredulously, shooting Joel a look that could melt steel.

Joel looked up from his book, his expression innocent. "What's wrong with that? It's strong, powerful, unforgettable!"

She rolled her eyes, trying to suppress the laughter bubbling up inside her. "Joel, I am not naming the baby after a natural disaster."

Joel shrugged, undeterred. "But think about it! Hurricanes leave a lasting impact–"

She shook her head, cutting him off, unable to even entertain the idea any longer. "No way. This child deserves a name that won't scare people away." She placed a hand on her stomach. 

Joel grinned, setting his book aside. "Alright, alright. No Hurricane Miller then. Though, I bet Tornado Miller is a lot coo–”

She threw a pillow at him, laughing despite herself. "You're impossible, Joel Miller."

It was pretty easy to fall back into a certain level of friendship with Joel. 

She found herself feeling more grateful for his help and his presence the past few days he spent at her place, more than she expected at first.

Their first evening back home after picking up Joel's things from his place post-hospital was awkward. The fear of something happening to her baby, going to labor earlier than expected and the fact that he broke her heart months ago still aches, casting a shadow over the week ahead.  (Flashback)

The drive back home was filled with a palpable tension, both Joel and her lost in their own thoughts. Joel's mind raced with the implications of the unexpected phone call, while she grappled with the conflicting emotions stirred by Joel's presence and his offer to stay with her.

As they pulled up to the curb outside her house, she let out a sigh, her hand instinctively resting on her swollen belly. "Thank you for driving me home, Joel," she said softly, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

Joel nodded, his expression serious yet tinged with a hint of vulnerability. "I meant what I said, you know," he replied, his voice gentle. "I want to be here for you and the baby, however I can."

She met his gaze, her heart fluttering with a mixture of apprehension and longing. "I appreciate that, Joel," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "But I also don't want to impose on you or disrupt your life."

Joel reached out and gently squeezed her hand, his touch warm and reassuring. "You're not imposing, darlin'," he said softly. "You're family. And family takes care of each other, no matter what."

Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes as she absorbed his words, overwhelmed by the depth of emotion in his simple yet heartfelt declaration. 

She had spent so long trying to prove her independence, to show Joel and everyone else that she could handle everything on her own. 

But now, faced with Joel's unwavering support and his genuine desire to be there for her, she found herself letting go of her stubborn pride and allowing herself to lean on him, if only for a little while.

"Thank you, Joel," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "I... I would really appreciate your help."

A soft smile tugged at the corners of Joel's lips as he leaned in closer, his warm breath brushing against her cheek. "Anytime, darlin'," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll always be here for you."

With a gentle nod, she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the car door, Joel following suit. 

(/End of Flashback)

That was five days ago and they were able to reconnect and rekindle their friendship a little easier each day. She forgot how easy it was with him and couldn’t help but let her mind wander into the what if’s each night. 

She had braced herself for a quiet week, prepared to coexist in silence. Setting a firm expectation in her own mind that he is just helping her because he felt obligated to help her out so he could be involved in their child's life down the line. 

After all, he did say that he didn't want a life like this with me. She thought as Joel walked into her bedroom carrying a tray of food with a small smile on his beautiful face. 

A life like this…

Domestic. 

One where they build a family and spend the rest of their lives together. 

Joel set the tray of food down on the bed, glancing at her with a small, almost shy smile. They had fallen into a rhythm over the past few days, one that felt both familiar and strange. There was still a lot left unspoken between them, but tonight, the silence that hung between them seemed heavier.

As they ate, Joel broke the quiet first, his voice tentative. "You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about what happened between us."

She looked up from her plate, meeting his eyes. There was something different in his tone, something more serious than their usual light-hearted conversations. "Yeah?" she prompted, keeping her voice neutral.

He nodded, taking a deep breath before continuing. "I said some things… things I shouldn’t have. And I’ve regretted every word since."

She swallowed, the memories of that painful night still fresh in her mind. "Joel, we both said things. It wasn’t just you."

"But it was me who pushed you away," Joel cut in, his voice firm yet laced with guilt. "I thought… I thought I was doing the right thing. That you deserved better than what I could give you."

Her heart clenched at his words, and she set her fork down, giving him her full attention. "Joel, it's fine... we're trying to move on from it... for her..." She said, placing a hand on her swollen belly to make her point. 

He looked at her, his eyes filled with a mix of regret and something deeper, something that made her chest tighten. "I wanted to marry you," he confessed quietly. "I still do, if I’m being honest. But back then, I was scared. I didn’t think I was good enough for you. I’m just a single dad, scraping by. How could I give you the life you deserve?"

Her breath caught in her throat at his admission. She had dreamed of this moment, of hearing those words from him, but now, it felt bittersweet. "Joel," she began softly, "I didn’t need you to give me the world. I was happy with what we had. I was happy with you... It just really hurt me to hear out loud that after everything we've been through, you still looked at me as an outsider."

He closed his eyes for a moment, as if bracing himself, then opened them again, the pain in his gaze clear. "I know I hurt you. I can’t take back what I said, but if I could, I would. In a heartbeat."

She reached out, her hand finding his, and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I was hurt," she admitted, her voice trembling slightly. "But I understand why you felt the way you did. I just… I really wish we could have talked about it then, you know? Soften the blow a little." She managed to chuckle. 

Joel nodded, his grip tightening around her hand. "I’m sorry for my insecurities. And for how I lashed out because of them. I didn’t mean any of it. You deserve to know that."

They sat in silence for a moment, both lost in their own thoughts, before she finally spoke again, her voice soft. "Maybe… maybe this is just where we’re at now, you know? Maybe this truly is what was meant to happen for us... just two people trying to figure out how to be good parents, how to be friends, even if it’s hard."

Joel gave her a sad smile, nodding in agreement. "Yeah. Maybe."

The conversation left them both feeling raw, yet oddly at peace. It wasn’t a perfect resolution, but it was a start.

Later that afternoon, she was resting in bed when she noticed a phone ringing on the nightstand. Assuming it was hers, she picked it up and answered. "Hello?"

There was a brief pause before a woman’s voice came through the line. "Hi, is Joel there? I just wanted to check if we could move our dinner to Saturday instead of Friday?"

Her heart stopped, the realization hitting her like a ton of bricks. This wasn’t her phone. This was Joel’s.

Struggling to keep her voice steady, she slightly stammered in reply, "O-oh, yeah sure. I’ll let him know."

She hung up just as Joel walked into the room with another tray. He frowned at the sight of her holding his phone. "Everything okay?"

She handed him the phone, her expression carefully neutral. "You should call her back. She wants to reschedule your dinner from Friday to Saturday."

Joel’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, but he quickly masked it. "Thanks," he mumbled, pocketing his phone.

As they sat down to eat, the easy rhythm they had found was suddenly gone. She was distant, her responses to his attempts at conversation brief and unengaged. Joel noticed, of course, but didn’t push. He knew her well enough to realize that something had shifted.

The atmosphere between them remained tense through the rest of the evening and into the following morning. Even during the drive to the clinic, she kept her responses short, her mind clearly elsewhere.

When they arrived and were called into the doctor’s office, she finally turned to Joel, her voice soft yet firm. "Thank you for everything, Joel. But you don’t have to come in with me. You should go home and get ready for your dinner."

Joel stared at her, dumbfounded by her words. "What? No, I want to be here for you, for the baby."

She gave him a small, sad smile, her eyes reflecting the hurt she was trying so hard to mask. "I appreciate it, but I’ll be fine. Really."

Before he could protest further, she walked into the doctor’s office, leaving Joel standing there, still reeling from the sudden change.

Next Chapter 👉🏻

[jasntodds]

Penance [2]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader

Words: 8,134

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, a little bit of angst, some fluff, mentions of death, mentions of injuries, some canon violence

Summary: ❝Thesus: Stop. Give me your hand. I am your friend. Herakles: I fear to stain your clothes with blood. Thesus: Stain them. I don’t care.❞

It’s been a month and a half since Crane’s reign of terror was stopped, leaving Gotham to finally return to normal. But, what is normal? After everything Jason and you have been through, it seems normal might be some unobtainable dream state. But that’s not going to stop either of you from trying and maybe, you’ll get lucky in the end. At the end of it, the two of you have suffered enough, right?

Right?

A/N: I hope you guys like this chapter!! It's just the beginning of what's to come!! lol You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary  and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

By the time the next day rolls around, Jason still doesn’t know Dick has asked you to help out. He thinks it’s just him which does have him wondering why Dick didn't ask you. It seems a bit odd given your whole friendship with Tim anyway but he chalks it up to maybe you being busy. Molly mentioned you were working on a case that kept you pretty busy. Maybe you've just been preoccupied with that to actually help. Jason isn’t sure and he isn’t entirely sure why it matters. It doesn’t. It shouldn't.

Jason gets ready to go find Tim. Dick sent him the time Tim should be arriving in Gotham with the specific instructions Dick gave Tim. Jason thinks about how if only Tim knew how lucky he was that Jason is going to be there. Tim has almost no training at all and Dick has basically thrown him to the wolves, or so Tim will think. And Jason can’t help but even feel a little excited over this whole thing. The last time he saw Tim, he was lying on the ground dying. Because of him. This is how he can start to repay Tim for the damage he caused him and his family. It is the least he could possibly do. Tim might not like him after, but he will be prepared and he will be a good Robin. Jason will make sure of it.

Jason heads out to find Tim, daunting his Red Hood gear and helmet. The drive isn’t too far from his safe house but it is raining tonight, on and off. Yesterday was nice, warm and no rain. It’s a bit of a depressing contrast between the two days. The street lights reflect off the wet pavement and Jason isn’t entirely sure what he’s going to do when he gets there. All he knows is Tim will probably need help and he’ll just take it from there. It’s not exactly how he wants to approach any situation but he’s not sure what Tim will even be doing.

Jason pulls up to a building across the street from an alley where some, surely, illegal deal of sorts is going down. Apparently, Tim is supposed to be here eventually so Jason parks the bike in the dark of his alley before he uses a grappling hook to get to the roof of the building just so he can see better. And then he waits.

Meanwhile, you’ve made your place on the roof overlooking the alley with the van, knowing this is where Tim will be. And you can’t help but feel excited to see him. You miss him a lot even if it is a little hard to be happy it’s under the circumstances of Robin. There’s also the bit of dread and excitement over seeing Jason, working with Jason.

Seeing him means there’s going to have to be some sort of conversation over the two of you being unable to pick up a phone and call each other. There’s going to be some sort of conversation about everything that happened. It’s going to bring back all of the pain all over again. Will you even be able to pick up where you left off? Or will you fall into an awkward dance where you both just fumble over each other until Tim leaves? Or will it be worse? But, seeing him, being around him, always felt the most like home and you really hope he’s okay and happy. You’re excited just to see how he’s doing.

You’re laying on your stomach to take cover while you watch over the ledge but your fingers tap wildly against the pavement at the thought. It’s the hope this goes okay, that he doesn’t hate you. That Tim is happy to see you both. That Tim doesn’t get killed in the first five minutes of being Robin. Excitement, dread, and anxiety flood your system. Why did you agree to this?

Commotion starts from below you and you see Tim on the top of a car while the goons are loading their van. Even in the low light, you can tell the suit is a little different than Jason’s and Dick’s. The cape definitely is with its jagged edges and it’s longer. It fits him actually. You stand on the edge of the roof, grappling hook in hand and knife in the other, ready to slide down the second things get out of hand. 

Tim handles himself okay at first but then they outnumber him and they’re faster than he is and better. You know Tim has had a few training sessions but by the looks of it, they could not have been very long or helpful. Things start looking pretty bad for him so you use the grappling hook to lower yourself down but before your feet even hit solid ground, shots ring through the alley, taking out one of the men and then the other. Just as your feet hit the ground, you nail the last one with a knife, turning to face down the alley with your arms crossed. And there he is, walking confidently with a gun in hand.

Of course, he beat you to it.

Jason’s eyes widen behind his helmet. He did not expect to see you tonight. Kind of like last night, seeing you throws him off. It’s a bit jarring somehow. Gotham might be a big city but you travel in the same circles, it was bound to happen. Just…two nights in a row seems…odd.

“I had that covered.” You state through your mask.

Jason can taste his heartbeat in his throat as he keeps closing the distance between you. Your mask always muffled your voice a little but it’s still his favorite sound. He can feel his cheeks burning and a smile desperate to cross his lips. Jason bites it back, trying to keep his composure.

“Where the fuck did you even come from?” Jason quips back.

He is eternally grateful for the helmet. You wre always best at reading him. You could read every expression that ever washed over his face no matter how subtle it was. It was as if you could read each other's minds half the time and he is so glad you can't see him. His eyes are scanning you over, noticing nothing too new in the suit. It still fits you just as it always did, perfectly fitted in the all right places. His eyes go back up to your face, the hood is pulled onto your head. He catches the yellowing around one of your eyes and he almost asks what happened before he swallows it down. It's not entirely his place to ask at the moment but he thinks you're still just as beautiful today as you were the first time he saw you and the last time he saw you.

You point to the roof. “Clearly. And you?” You question, keeping your voice flat and curious, trying to conceal your own nerves.

Jason points a thumb over his shoulder. “Clearly.” He echoes as he stands next to you.

It all clicks then, this was definitely a setup by Dick. Of all fucking people, Dick Grayson is doing this shit? Jason swears up and down this is getting ridiculous. Bruce, Molly, Gar, Dick? They are all trying to get you two to communicate and…maybe they have a point even if Jason never wants to admit it. Not when two of those people are Bruce and Dick. But, he can’t focus on that or how this is sending his head into a tailspin.

He needs to help Tim which means he can’t let his feelings for you get in the way even if ignoring them is one of the hardest things he’s ever done. He has to act normal and like being next to you doesn’t make him want to explode. He needs to keep his cool, keep the smile from ripping apart his lips because even if this is a setup and he should be mad, he misses you so fucking much it physically pains him. He can’t find himself to be mad because you’ll never abandon Tim so even if you don’t speak to Jason while you help him, at least he gets to see you as you. Like old times even if it doesn’t last and for that, Jason is happy.

Jason reaches behind his head, releasing the helmet before he takes it off and you swear you swallowed your heart. He looks so good. “Who the fuck are you supposed to be?” Jason calls, eyes locked on Tim and you think you’ve melted at the sound of his voice.

His voice is somehow better than you remember it. A little calloused, a little rough, but not too deep. It always fit him so well and you’ve never been so thankful to have a mask that covers the lower half of your mouth because your lips are curling into the most uncontrollable smile. Every piece of reservation you had about seeing him completely flies out of the window.

Jason Todd has always had his type of gravitation pull like a planet lost in the universe and you’ve just been sucked right back into it.

You miss him so fucking much.

Tim looks down to his chest, right at the R symbol before he looks back to Jason. “I’m Robin.” Tim states as if Jason should have known.

The subtle hint of a smile comes over Jason’s lips seeing someone else in the Robin suit. It’s weird because it almost feels…hurtful. It hurts a little seeing someone else in a position where he was, not in a jealous way but in a way that he is reminded that was him. He was Robin and he fucked up and now he’s not. It hurts in the way he’s reminded of it being ripped away from his bloody hands. The suit is different, Jason clocks almost every difference in the first few seconds but it is similar. Jason was beaten to death in something similar with the same mantle. There’s almost this part of him that even worries about it. Robin didn’t work for Dick. He didn’t die as Robin but it didn’t work for him. Jason was killed. Where’s that going to leave Tim?

On the other hand though, there is something about someone else taking up Robin that feels good. Jason died but Robin didn’t. Robin never had to die with Jason and he shouldn’t. The people need a Robin and he doesn’t really know Tim but you do and Gar does. He trusts you both and Tim looks thrilled to be here. It’s a mix but there is something kind of nice seeing the resurrection of Robin.

“Hey.” You chime as you walk closer to him.

Tim’s smile splits his face. “Hey, how’d you know I’d be here?”

“Molly tracked you the second a Robin showed up. Knew it was you.” You laugh softly before you pull him into a gentle hug. “You should have told me.” You say as you pull away, your hands coming to his shoulders as you look over the suit, noticing all the difference between this one and Jason’s.

“Yeah, I thought I could handle this.” Tim chuckles sheepishly, realizing he was a little in over his head tonight but not lacking in any of his confidence to do this job. 

“Clearly, you were wrong.” Jason closes the distance between you. “You’re lucky we showed up when we did.” Jason stands right beside you as you drop your hands from his shoulders, maybe you looking over the suit makes Jason want to chew his tongue out of his mouth.

“Yeah, I got that.” Tim nods his head. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” The smile reaches your eyes as you beam back at Tim.

Jason’s eyes narrow at you slightly. You seem awfully happy. He knows Tim is your friend but you just seem overly happy or maybe he’s in his own head about it. He just remembers that day picking you up from Titans Tower and it was…similar. It’s like he’s getting stabbed in the chest and the base of his throat knowing you were not happy to see him tonight. The very thought of your feelings disappearing makes him feel like his rib cage might collapse on itself. So, he pushes it away as far as he possibly can and bites back his own words, trying to just be relieved you look happy instead of pissed off Dick set you up. He’s just thankful you haven’t run away. Yet.

“What’re you doing here anyways?” Jason asks with the nod of his head at Tim.

“Dick sent me.” Tim starts before explaining this whole fake plan thing Dick sent him on while you and Jason pretend to act as if you have no clue what he’s talking about.

Jason nods his head. “Well, it's getting pretty late. I got a place. Come on.” Jason jerks his head down the alley before he starts walking, not even waiting for a response.

“Wait, really?” Tim asks with hope.

“Before I change my mind.” Jason states, his back fully towards you and Tim before he puts the helmet on.

Tim’s eyes are wide with excitement. He gets to work the Red Hood?! He knows it’s Jason but he was the second Robin and he doesn’t even know much about him. Gar and you talk about him and he met him a few times but this is totally different. Red Hood is going to help him with this?

“You can ride me with. I’ve got an extra helmet. I figured you’d need a ride.” You put a hand on his shoulder before nodding towards Jason. “My bike’s not far.”

The three of you make your way to Jason’s bike that’s closer and then to yours before you and Tim follow Jason to his safe house. It’s the one you took him to when Crane kidnapped him. You stare up at the building for a few seconds, feeling something a bit bitter in the back of your throat over it. Jason can move on, you hope with everything in you that he is, but as someone who cares about him, it's your job to be bitter and pissed about everything Crane did to him forever.

Tim and you follow Jason into the building, now the three of you in your street clothes after taking a detour to change. You've almost had your eyes practically glued to Jason ever since. And it’s taking everything in Jason to focus on the task at hand and not stare at you with a million questions.

The hallway is messy. There’s stuff on the floor everywhere and even though Jason is walking ahead of you, you can’t help but narrow your eyes at him. Surely, he has time to pick up the floor instead of kicking things to the side as he walks by. Jason is always so meticulous with things he likes but he just can’t help the mess in a hallway or his room for some reason.

“Venta?” Jason asks, keeping his steady pace ahead of you and Tim.

“Yeah.” Tim starts. “He lives down on Harbor.”

“Never heard of ‘em.” Jason states, walking through the hallway where he has a laptop set up before he starts typing away at something.

“Dick says he’s got information on the Organization.” Tim explains as he stands beside Jason, resting his arm on the open counter space.

“He sent you to get intel on the Organization?” You ask.

“Yeah.” Tim says casually, but almost like he wants to be offended you'd question it but then he looks between you and Jason. “Maybe we could team on this.” Tim suggests. “The three of us.”

Jason looks to him, struggling not to glance at you before he turns around and starts walking away swiftly. “I don’t team anymore.” Jason says as the laptop makes a noise, you peaking over at it as Tim trails after Jason.

Security system, and a nice one, too. It looks at least similar to the one used at Wayne Manor and in the Batcave. There seems to be some sort of cloaking system to shield his location from anyone who might be looking for him. You've heard he’s made several big-name enemies in Gotham already which is not surprising. Gotham’s newest crime lord is going to take some heat. Of course, he's protecting himself. You're actually relieved by the system. Maybe the security system lets Jason get some sort of sleep.

“Security activated.” The computer sounds through the speakers above the three of you.

“You don’t understand.” Tim defends while you move to catch up with them. “Brother Blood put my boyfriend in a coma.” Tim watches as Jason climbs the stairs before he quickly follows suit, you right behind him.

Jason knows he has to play this off, even if Tim is going to nag him all night. If Jason immediately jumps to help him, Tim won't learn a damn thing and he'll probably figure it out. Jason has heard all about Tim's intelligence and detective skills. If Tim is going to be Robin, Jason's not going to make it easy.

“How long you been doing this Robin thing?” Jason asks.

“Um…” Tim stutters as him and you enter one of the rooms with Jason, Jason still several feet ahead of you. There’s workout equipment, monitors, a fridge. It looks like this is where he trains and keeps his eyes on Gotham. “Not long.” Tim says.

“A couple weeks?” Jason asks as he looks over his monitors on the far end of the room.

“Not quite.” Tim states, looking around the room.

“A week?” Jason asks.

“Last night was my first night.” Tim admits, almost sounding defeated.

You nearly cackle. “Sorry, what?” You spit back as Jason turns around. The two of you exchange a look of surprise and confusion. Dick did not say Tim had no training.

"Yeah..." Tim looks between you and Jason, unsure where you're going to take this conversation. He hopes it'll get you both on his side. He could use the help.

“Oh, the suit did look fresh off the rack.” Jason states. This is going to take a lot of time and effort. “If I were you, I’d get out of Gotham. Take some reps in like Tucson or some shit.” Jason states as he leans his lower back against the table with the monitors, his hands holding the edge of the table.

“Shit’s been quite a bit messy lately and the Bat’s outa town.” You explain as you cross your arms over your chest.

“Dick sent me here to find Venta.” Tim nearly cuts you both off.

“Your funeral.” Jason shakes his head. “You can crash here if you don’t have plans.” Jason gestures a hand out, offering his place for Tim. “I mean, there’s eggs, beer, cheese.” Jason gestures quickly to the fridge sitting on the wall facing Jason on the opposite side of the room.

“That is a lovely diet, Jason.” You mutter back, earning you a bit of a glare from Jason.

It's not exactly like Jason to not have some sort of variety. Generally, he eats pretty healthy in order to maintain the muscle and physical fitness to do this whole thing but eggs and cheese aren't exactly the healthiest thing, especially with the addition of beer. You know he's been busy with Red Hood, helping Barbara. But, you wonder if this is one of those things Molly and Gar are worried about. You make a mental note of it to ask later.

“Been busy.” Jason quips back, almost gauging how you’ll respond.

“I can see that.” Your eyes widen as your hands gesture around.

“Thanks.” Tim interrupts you, unsure if this will be an argument or some weird banter thing you two do. Tim sets the case with the suit against the wall and that’s when he sees a clear board with a cipher on it that looks like Jason’s been trying to crack. “You working on something?” Tim gestures towards it as he starts walking towards it.

“No. I’m paying the fucking cable bills.” Jason quips back.

“Need some help?” Tim asks, his hands in his pockets as he looks over the cipher.

“Since you’re being nosy,” Jason starts before he walks over to Tim, you joining on the opposite side. “Shimmer’s been pulling off high-end heists all over Gotham.” Jason explains. “Sending ciphers as clues.”

Tim looks over the cipher a bit more and he’s got it. He reaches over for the eraser next to the board and starts erasing some of the code Jason has cracked.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Jason questions.

“You got your A right but your coding’s off.” Tim explains making you stifle a laugh.

“Fuck you.” Jason defends as he watches Tim.

“It’s a Fibonacci Sequence.” Tim states. “Each number is the sum of two numbers that precedes it.” Tim explains. Jason and you take a step back to watch Tim work. “K-L-E-I-D-S-C-O-P-E.” Tim spells it out, writing each letter. Tim takes a step back, a proud smile on his face while the three of you look over the word.

“Kaleidoscope.” Jason states. “Oh, shit.” Jason starts, rushing over to this phone sitting not the table beside the board.

“I just had fresh eyes.” Tim states, still looking at the board.

“Right, nothing to do with being a genius or anything.” You quip back.

“Hey, Babs.” Jason says with the phone now pressed to his ear. “Uh, Kaleidoscope Auction House. That’s the target for Shimmer’s next hit.” Jason explains before he pauses, looking back at Tim for just a second. “And I’ll take my usual percentage.” Jason says before he hangs up the phone. “So, you are really smart.” Jason states.

“Told you.” You mutter.

“It’s nothing, really.” Tim brushes it off.

“Right.” Jason nods his head. “So, what’s your plan anyways? Stick around Gotham until you find this guy?” Jason asks before he walks over to the fridge, you pull up a seat by the monitors.

“Uh, yeah, I guess.” Tim shrugs. “I asked around tonight but no one seems to know what I’m talking about.”

Jason nods his head, beer now in hand before he opens it. “Want one?” Jason asks. "Water, Gatorade?" Jason offers before his eyes go back to you. "I have other shit."

You roll your eyes, pathetically putting your hands up in defense, keeping your mouth shut this time. For once, you can't quite tell if your subtle jabs are actual jabs or if it's what you usually do. At this point, you're too afraid to ask because either answer sounds a bit too much.

“No, thanks.” Tim states.

Jason pulls a blue Gatorade from the fridge before crossing the room and offering it to you. It wasn't even a thought Jason had because you've always been someone who will not accept an offer of a drink and then drink his. It was more of a reflex to grab the Gatorade for you. A gentle smile pulls at your lips as you take it softly from him, careful not to let your hand brush his.

“Asking the wrong people probably.” Jason answers as he leans against the table in the space right beside you. “Or they don’t you seriously.” Jason uncaps his beer with the remark.

“Second one.” You state as you uncap your bottle.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tim looks back at the both of you.

“You got your ass kicked tonight.” You state. “I got a feeling you aren’t very good at being intimidating.” You shrug your shoulder casually before you take a drink.

“Hey,” Tim gestures toward you. “I figured out all of you guys and got you to cave about it. I’m pretty good, I think.”

“You’re my friend and I felt bad for lying.” You chortle before you take a sip. "I was at no point ever intimated by you."

“If she didn’t want you to know, she never would have led you to believe otherwise.” Jason takes his own drink knowing damn well you could have, at the very least, hid your own identity from Tim if you really wanted to.

“Still, one of them would have told me! I’m Robin.” Tim tries to defend himself, his voice almost defensive until it finally hits enthusiastic with the mention of 'Robin'.

The way he says it makes you burst out laughing. The amount of times you've heard the words 'I'm Robin' with so much pride and enthusiasm makes it funny. It’s the innocence and confidence Robin brings. Tim isn’t as…cheerful, enthusiastic about it as Jason was. Tim has seen the horrors already but…there is something familiar about it that makes you laugh. You hope he's able to keep that.

Jason thinks he’s melted into the ground with your laugh. The hard part of this whole thing is not going to be training Tim. That’ll be easy. The hardest part is going to pretend like it isn’t killing him to act like this is all fine with him and you. It is killing him not to poke fun at you or ask about everything. This is going to be torture.

“That what I sounded like?” Jason asks quietly.

“Kind of.” You nod your head at him, a soft and beaming smile directed right at him.

“What?” Tim questions.

“Nothing.” You brush it off. “Okay, look, why don’t you stay here with Jason for tonight and I’ll come by tomorrow. We’ll go look together.”

“You do teams?” Tim quips.

“No.” You shake your head, knowing that is a bald-faced lie. “But you’re my friend and I help my friends.”

“Okay, yeah, cool.” Tim smiles widely. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” You nod softly before clearing your throat. “I’m gonna head out then. Uh…” You pause for a second before you get to your feet. “Molly is probably waiting for me so I’ll just text you what time to be ready.” You offer Jason a nervous nod and closed-mouth smile.

You make your way to Tim, giving him a quick hug before you head for the door. Jason almost lets you. But, seeing you and feeling this way? It’s not what he wants. He doesn’t want you to be here just because Dick asked you. He doesn’t want you to be here just for Tim. He can’t just pretend this is all fine.

“I’ll, uh, walk you out.” Jason pushes off the table, earning you to turn around, raising a brow at him.

“Uh...yeah, yeah, okay.” You nod slowly. “Thanks.”

“Don’t touch anything.” Jason warns Tim before catching up to you.

You and Jason walk side-by-side out of the room and your stomach is swirling, turning into a goo. You're nearly vibrating from nervousness being around him again. And he looks so good. He looks healthy. The last time you saw him, he was covered in scrapes and bruises but there aren’t any on his face. You know there have to be some under his clothes but his face looks good and his cheeks aren’t as hollowed as they were before. His hair is fluffy just as it always was. He looks good.

Jason glances at you and Jason Todd is not one to get nervous but he is so nervous right now he’s stuffing his hands in his pockets just because his hands are sweating too much. It’s you and he has no reason to be nervous but his heart is thundering in his chest and he wants to smile ear-to-ear. Everything is different but it almost doesn’t feel that way. His heart is beating for you right now just as it did from day one to day 100. It only ever beats for you.

The two of you reach the door, standing and facing each other. There should be sort of 'see you later' exchange that happens but neither of you entirely know how to do that. Not with each other. You were friends, then friends with benefits, then together, and now you're exes. A handshake still feels far too professional given the intimacy that stands between you and the horrors you've endured together. A wave feels fucking pathetic. And a hug seems a bit out of the question.

It's not even like either of you want to do this whole 'see you later' thing. You both have endless questions and if tonight ends, tomorrow will begin and it might be different again. Jason doesn't want to risk anything in this. So, instead of fumbling his way through a goodbye that would haunt him in his sleep for the next ten years, he starts conversation just to stall you a little.

“What’d you do?” Jason jerks his head, pointing towards the bruise on your eye and he almost touches it. He has to force his hands to stay in his pockets.

“Oh, uh,” You smile softly, touching the yellow with your fingertips. “Molly, actually.”

“No fucking way.” Jason chuckles.

“Yeah, uh, been training her a bit.” Your brows furrow just for a second before you lick your lips. “She asked just to be prepared walking home or some shit. Um…and uh, obviously, you taught her a thing or two. But, she actually fell and I got an elbow to the face.”

Jason lets out a booming laugh and you forget how to breathe. It sounds just as lovely as it did before. Booming and loud, thunder shaking your rib cage free of all its pain.

“It was an accident?”

“Yeah.” You nod quickly. “Fucking painful one. This shit is two weeks out. My eye was swollen shut for like two days!”

Jason keeps laughing and his nose scrunches. You swear he’s still the cutest person to ever walk the earth. How could anyone not be in love with him?

“Sorry, you alright?” Jason asks, but the smile is still ripping across his face as he licks his lips.

“I am fine, thank you.” You nod your head, a soft smile on display. “You, uh, you look good, Jay.”

The nickname sends his head into a spiral. He can’t believe after everything you’ve done to each other and the time that’s passed, you can still make him feel this way. You make him feel like everything is gonna be alright somehow. And he makes you so happy. Something so simple and it’s just joy.

“Thanks.” Jason nods his head. “So do you.” His eyes soften with the ease of his words.

“Thank you.” You pull in a breath.

There’s a silence that falls over you and something hits you both. This is a request from Dick. It wasn’t supposed to be a reunion for you. It just happened to work out that way. Jason still did all of that and you still hurt him and betrayed him. Neither one of you had the courage to call the other. It took Tim coming here needing help. Something about that really hurts. Your minds take over even as happy as you are to see each other, to feel the love blossom through your chests. But, you look at each other and wonder how you could ever ask for forgiveness, especially with each other looking so good. So, you don’t. You punish yourselves.

“Molly’s helping me, by the way.” You blurt out on purpose, knowing it’ll piss him off.

You aren't trying to hurt him, you're just pissing him off. Jason will snap and fire back and you think you'll deserve it. Jason Todd has been very good at pushing everyone away and you've been very good at running. But, you know Jason expects you to run. If he ever wanted to forgive you for some reason, he'll know exactly what to do. So, you take a page out of his book and push. It'll catch him off guard, piss him off, and it'll be what you deserve anyway. You push.

Jason shakes his head, eyes widening. “What the fuck does that mean?” He snaps, searching your face for any indication this is some sort of joke.

“She helps me as Bluejay.” You shrug your shoulders.

“Why the fuck would you let her do that?!” Jason nearly demands as he crosses his arms.

Molly is his friend, too. He knew something was going on but he didn’t think Molly was actually helping. At this point, he's pretty sure the two of you have lost your damn minds. Molly didn't even agree with Batman and Robin and now she's helping? All people do in this path is get hurt or worse. Jason isn't going to give it up and he'd never ask anyone to. But, why the fuck would you let Molly help you? If he knows you at all, he knows you shouldn't be happy about it.

“She asked.” You keep your voice nonchalant, knowing that'll irritate him even more.

“Oh, so fuck it, right? She asked and you’re just gonna let her? And what the fuck are you gonna do when someone figures it out, huh?” Jason seethes as he tosses his right arm to the side.

“Oh, but it’s fine for Tim, right?” You question back as you blink at Jason. He doesn't seem to have a single issue with Tim, just Molly which is some of the ammo you were looking to get out of this.

“He wouldn’t leave any of you guys alone!” Jason defends, his hands shooting out to his sides. Molly and Gar have said they're worried bout you and while he's getting pissed off, he's also growing worried. Starting an argument with him is very uncharacteristic. “Molly isn’t a fighter! You’re putting her in harm’s way!” Jason shakes his head before clocking the Tim remark entirely. “I don’t have a fucking say on if Tim’s Robin, by the way. He’s your fucking friend, too! The fuck are you mad at me for?”

“But you were the previous Robin!” You snap back and you aren’t even sure why you do it. You don't want Robin to be the topic of the argument because that isn't fair. You just can't help it, your mouth is moving faster than your guilt and reason. “You’re not bothered by it at all but I have Molly working on a computer and that’s not fine?” You spit back.

Ow.

If there's anything Jason knows about punishing himself, it's what pushing looks like. He's not entirely sure what is setting you off but there's something. You're hitting a low blow bringing Robin into it and while he doesn't want to fight, it hits an exposed nerve. Jason Todd has always hated feeling exposed.

Jason shakes his head with a bitter laugh. “You haven’t fucking talked to me in over a month but now you think you know how I fucking feel about a Robin?” Jason lets out a scoff. “And yeah because Molly doesn’t need to be in the fucking middle of some bullshit you won’t be able to handle. You’ll get hurt or some bullshit, go to her, and you’ll be tracked. You don’t have a security system, bet your locks are shit, what’re you gonna do, huh?”

“Yeah, well, phones work both ways, Jason.” You spit back, choosing to ignore the second half of the argument. He isn't wrong and you know it. “Molly wouldn’t leave me alone about it and ya know, in my experience, the more we let people not help when they are adamant, they do it anyway and then they die or get hurt.” You scoff back. “Seemed better this way.” Sam nearly mutters it bitterly.

Jason can feel his heart breaking again because this isn't about Molly. He knew it wasn't but it's still about him. He's thinking you're not over the fact that he died which you should not be. But, it almost feels like you're choosing to blame him for his own death and that's something he never thought you would do.

“The fuck is that supposed mean?” Jason asks, his voice rough and angered but he’s not yelling. That’s always the most hurtful form of Jason Todd.

Too far. Too far. Too far.

You never intended to hurt him. It's just...maybe there's a lot of unsaid things from both of you because you both were always so worried about fucking it up. What's left to fuck up now?

You backpedal anyway because it is not fair. It's not his fault. “Nothing.” You shake your head.

“No, tell me what you really mean.” Jason keeps his stance, his voice unwavering.

Jason sees it as you blaming him but that's not true. The way you see it, if people want to help, maybe they're better off to help. Jason and you were held captive and dropped from a Skyscraper because you wanted to help and Dick said no. Jason wanted to be Robin and help and Bruce ripped it away. Tim wanted to help but everyone said no. Anytime someone really wants to help, they do and then they get hurt or worse. Molly was going to try and help one way or another. This way, you can keep an eye on her. Though, you can't quite bring yourself to explain it all.

“You. Me. Tim. Dick. Gar. Rachel.” You explain. “All of us.”

“And we were fucking thrown into this shit. All of us.” Jason argues his side. “I sure as shit didn’t pick it--”

“But you would have!” You scream back because it all just hurts again. He's lying to himself if he doesn't think he wouldn't have picked Robin if it were a choice. “Don’t pretend like Robin was some burden thrown onto you because he wasn’t! You loved it. You still do. Bruce may have weaponized you but he offered it to you and you took it.”

He knows you're right. Of course, he would have picked it. It was the coolest and greatest thing to happen to him at the time. He was useful and he was enough. He was finally fucking good at something and he was finally good for something. It made him feel like he belonged somewhere even if it didn't last. Of course, he'd do it again. As hard as it is, as tortuous as the last few months have been, he doesn't think he'd do anything differently.

“Fine, what about you?” Jason quips back. “Dick gave you a fucking choice. I remember that.” Jason scoffs. “You’d take it all back? If you knew how this ended.”

“Of fucking course I would, Jason!” Your voice finally cracks. “Yeah, I’d never fucking ask you to help me and I never would have went after Deathstroke with you or Jerry or any of this shit. If I could go back, I’d undo it.” You pull in a shaky breath and lower your voice. “It hurts all the time. I’d undo it.” You give him a sad and defeated shrug.

It hurts to say it but a part of you, really thinks you'd undo it if given the chance. Maybe you would just tell Dick no. Maybe it wouldn't be like this today. But, there is a larger part of you thinking you wouldn't be able to undo it. A lot of good came out of you being a Titan. You found this family and maybe had you just said no, it wouldn't be like this. You've been able to save a lot of people since being back on Gotham and doesn't that make it all worth it? The greater good should win.

You're looking at Jason and you wouldn't undo that. A lot of good came out of you being a Titan. Finding a family and new friends, Molly, learning how to properly fend for yourself and knowing you don't have to. It's all good. And Jason. A lot of good came out of being a Titan and Jason is so intertwined in that, you'd never be able to undo it without undoing you two.

You would never be able to.

You don't want to and this whole argument was just so stupid.

Jason looks to the ground and he knows what you mean but so much of you is intertwined in doing this that undoing that, almost feels like undoing you two. He knows that's not what you mean and you're angry over something Jason isn't sure what. You've talked about it. It's just harder today. It doesn't stop it from hurting though.

“Why put that on Molly then?” Jason brings his voice back down.

“Because you’d do it all over again.” You say softly. “Because Dick would do it over again. And Bruce and Tim and Kory and…all of them without even thinking twice about it. I think even Gar would. Molly won’t regret it and you know that.” You strengthen your voice.

This is stupid. He’s supposed to be doing better here but he fights you anyway. The punishment to himself and you started it. But…it doesn’t feel good to be here again. He doesn’t want to be here. He has fought tooth and nail to be alone and now that he is, he doesn’t like it too much. It hurts to be here alone. It hurts to be here without you. Jason promised you he’d make it up to you one day and yeah maybe he could have called and you could have called. But, neither of you did. Jason tells the voices in his head to shut the fuck up and he bites back at them.

“Just…make sure she’s safe.” Jason swallows thickly, catching you off guard. Jason never backs down. “You’re probably right. Molly can be pretty persistent.” He backs down for himself and for you. He won't let you punish yourself this way. You never let him.

“Yeah…” You trail off, tugging the sleeves of your hoodie over your hands as guilt eats away at your bones. “I didn’t want her help.” You whisper, caving, too. It doesn’t matter what you think you deserve and don’t deserve. Jason doesn’t deserve someone to push him away if he’s trying. That’s not fair. “But…it doesn’t work telling people no so…I make sure she’s okay.” You nod your head. “She is only my eyes in the sky. No one even knows I have someone on the inside.”

“Good.” Jason nods his head. “Yeah…” Jason trails off, his stare going to the floor, the white streak hanging loosely over his forehead.

One of you has to bring it up. One of you has to bring up the time you’ve spent apart. One of you has to say something besides the unsaid words that are nearly strangling you both. It will always feel giddy with a sense of dread and awkwardness unless you do. You always apologize.

“I’m sorry for not calling.” Jason states, catching you off guard and it’s like he’s just stacked twenty more pounds of guilt onto your pile. A lump grows in your throat and not once did you ever actually blame him for not calling you. You think he shouldn’t in order to protect himself. “I just…got busy and I don’t know.” Jason shrugs his right shoulder. “Should have.”

“I-I’m sorry, too.” You nod your head. “I, uh…yeah, busy.” You nod your head, swallowing the lump in your throat and biting back tears.

He has nothing to be sorry for.

Jason’s heart sinks because there’s something wrong. There is always something in the way you stutter around him that gives it away. It got to the point where you almost never did. You almost never tugged your sleeves down. It’s more of a nervous tick than anything and now you're doing it again. You're too exposed around him again and Jason can’t help but feel it’s all his fault and it’s too late. The thing you had, that strength that ruins mountains, has just wilted away. He thinks it might be his biggest regret.

“I’m really sorry.” You say more clearly this time. "For, uh, f-for not calling and uh, arguing with you just now. I, uh...I-I don't know." You tug the collar of your hoodie down just a bit, feeling suffocated by the fabric but then Jason sees the silver of a necklace around your neck.

You still wear it?

You open your mouth to talk but Jason cuts you off.

“Is that the necklace I gave you?” He blurts out before he can even process it.

He needs to know.

You look down, seeing the chain stare back a you before you pull the pendant from your hoodie and Jason wants to combust.

“Yeah.” You state, the infinity charm staring back a you. “Uh…” A smile pulls at your lips. You never take it off even when it all feels hopeless because maybe, just maybe, it's not just the cliche of infinity of you but some sort of symbol of hope that you'll find your way back to each other one day. “I know we haven’t talked and this shit feels awkward and shit but uh, I don’t know.” You lick your lips. “Figured Molly would call if you something happened and then…you’d know.”

You're realizing how dumb this whole thing. Maybe you can’t have what you really want. Maybe that’s not how this is meant to be. But you know he checks up on you and you know he knows you do the exact same. It’s silly and ridiculous for you to tiptoe over each other as if you haven’t witnessed each other at your best and worst. You held his lifeless body in your hands. Jason saves your life. Being a part from each other…not worth it.

A smile pulls at his lips before it turns into a smirk. “Someone’s gotta be prepared with your habit of being kidnapped.” Maybe it gives him hope, too.

“Shut the fuck up.” You groan. “It’s been months.” You can't help the smile that crosses your lips.

“You’re due.” Jason quips back.

You let out a laugh, sending a chill down Jason's spine. “I am good on that thanks.”

Jason tilts his back, feeling the same as you. This whole thing is fucking stupid. He needs to swallow his pride and he just doesn’t want you to leave. Despite his habit of spiraling into self-deprecating thoughts, he knows there has to be something left between you. Since the very first day, there has been something there. So, maybe you try this friend thing again. Maybe it'll work out.

“This is fucking stupid, right?” Jason laughs. “Not talking and shit.” He clarifies.

“Yeah.” You nod with a laugh. “Molly and Gar and Tim and Dick have been telling me that.”

“Molly, Gar, and Dick.” Jason groans. “Fuck, even Bruce.”

You let out a laugh. “Okay, you know it’s bad when Bruce is over here giving you advice on this shit.”

“Right?” Jason lets out a scoff. “We good?” Jason asks with hopeful eyes.

“Always were, Jay.” You smile softly at him and in that moment, you make a silent promise to yourself that you don’t care about your heart but you will guard his with every knife you have. “Friends who actually talk and act like it this time?” You question.

“Yeah, need someone to nag me.” Jason sticks his hand out.

“Oh, well, if you insist. Clean this fucking place, it’s a mess!” You take his hand in yours, shaking it softly.

“Since we’re friends, you could help.” Jason quips back, looking at the hallway that resembles the aftermath of a tornado.

You take your hand back. “You could go fuck yourself.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Jason grins back at you with furrowed brows.

Your brows raise with a splitting smile. “Ask your hand.”

Jason let out a chortle. “Fair.”

“Okay, seriously, I gotta get back. Molly will have too many questions if I stay any longer.” You nod your head, already mentally preparing for the amount of questions Molly will have and knowing none of them will actually pertain to Tim. “I’ll be back tomorrow, you gonna come?”

“Nah.” Jason shakes his head, figuring he'll let the two of you catch up by you showing him the ropes alone for a bit. “You guys go. Dick call you?”

“Mhm, you?” You pretend like you don’t know, mostly to keep the peace between the batboys.

“Yep.” Jason nods his head. “Setup?”

“Absolutely.” You laugh. "Dude still hasn't told Kory but he's setting us up."

"We have to repay the favor then, I guess." Jason offers you a wild and menacing grin.

"Oh, definitely." You nod quickly.

Jason shakes his head with a laugh. "Just gotta get Tim into shape first."

“We’ll get him ready in no time.” You beam back at him with the scrunch of your nose.

“We’ll start training when you guys get back tomorrow but follow my lead.” Jason offers, already ten steps ahead with a plan.

“Because Tim can’t know.” You finish.

“I got an idea.” Jason nods.

“You always have a plan.”

“Always.” The word babe almost slips from his lips.

“Okay, Jay.” Your cheeks burn, sensing it, too. “I will see you tomorrow.” You nod once before you turn on your heels and exit the building.

Jason watches you and his thinks he’s breathless. There’s something reminiscent of the first day he met you. Not entirely knowing much about you. He knows about you today but there’s a gap of time he’s missing. There are two actually because he doesn't know all of the details in the time he died. There are voids he’s missing and what’s changed about you because of them? It almost feels like that first day because his bones are vibrating with excitement and he can’t wait to see you again. It feels like it did then and he would love to keep chasing that feeling.

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[fcthots]

Not to make the 'Gus taking a bath' post even more cracky but to make it more cracky but if it's Gotham, the neighbors may not believe it that the cops actually tried to find out, so try to flag down Batman or another Bat vigilante to check in. Jason hates this more. Especially if it's Robin and he makes a remark about losing to -an obviously superior being- a cat.

❄️/🌌 anon (only adding both until I know what I am in your list lol)

DJFHDJHVB ANSWERED THIS AS SOON AS I SAW IT BC IT'S SO FUNNY

Robin is just patrolling on the rooftops, making sure everything's ok when he sees someone flagging him down from below.

He extends his grapple to land safely. "You really try to avoid walking the streets of Gotham alone at this hour. Is there anything you require immediate assistance with or are you looking to be escorted home?"

"I need your help. My neighbor is being abused!"

"By whom? A partner?"

"Yes! Hurry; you have to stop it!" The lady runs off and Robin follows her, preparing himself for a fight. Those who abuse their partners are some of the worst scum on the planet, and Damian feels the need to save the innocent.

He recognizes their location, just outside of crime alley. And even weirder, he recognizes the apartment building. He's spent several nights there. How could Todd's incompetence stop him from noticing such a situation in his own building?

Damian begins getting even more suspicious when the elevator hits the penthouse floor. There's no way this could have been overlooked. Eventually the woman leads him to a door he knows all too well. Damian sighs.

"Thank you, ma'am. Please go back into your apartment for your safety.”

A doubtful look crosses her face. "Can't you hear the yelling? No one believes me. He'll try to deny it, but that's what they all do! I know what I hear!"

"I will investigate it. Please return to your apartment." The woman goes back into her apartment and Damian knows she's got her ear to the door.

"-tt-"

He knocks on the door, hearing the following the sounds of several things falling to the ground and a yelp, not helping your case.

You open the door. "Oh, hey! We were just trying to bathe Gus. What are you here for?"

Damian points to the wall and then at his ear, signifying that someone is listening in. "Are you being abused?" He watches the dots connect in your head.

"No. I am not being abused. Thank you for checking on me."

"I'm afraid I must speak to your partner."

"This way," you turn your head and lead Damian down the hall. "JAY, ROBIN'S HERE."

"WHY?"

Finally you lead him into the bathroom and he sees Jason covered in cat scratches. "You just repeatedly have to make my life more difficult, Todd? I don’t even know how I'm supposed to defend you to that woman. Your wounds from your, clearly superior, opponent look like defensive wounds."

Jason hangs his head and lets it hit the bathtub. "Just tell her you you didn’t see any evidence, but you'll keep looking into it."

You finally pipe up again. "So, while you're here, can you guard the bathroom door while I go grab a towel?"

[otogariado]

mentioning LOST's church ending got me riled up about the racism in LOST again lol. i obviously am aware that some actors just did not return to production for possibly other reasons, but also especially in the case of harrold perrineau (michael dawson) he felt like his character (and walt, his son) was treated like shit by the writing. and he was absolutely right. i've already made posts about this (will try to dig them up later), but michael was treated absolutely bullshit and unfairly wrt the story. michael betrayed them and killed two people, yes, but what did he do it for but to protect his son? he felt like nobody gave enough fucks about walt and there was some truth to that claim. his whole character arc is about being a dad to walt and their improving relationship over the course of being stuck on the island, so of course he would do that. it just makes sense.

which is why i don't think it's all that fair to punish him for it immensely in the narrative. harrold perrineau said it himself that he didn't want michael and walt to be another case of the absent black father stereotype [citation needed, i'll look for it but he said it in an interview] yet that's what he ended up being anyway. after his and walt's escape from the island, apparently walt cast him away because he doesn't agree with what his father did—which i actually think its interesting to explore: walt disagreeing with michael's actions and trying to grapple with it, but i don't think separating him from his dad was the best writing choice to make. walt is being punished for caring about his son by making his son be the one to cast him away. you can argue it's supposed to be tragic, michael is supposed to be a tragic character, but with the context surrounding michael's character? there's better ways to make his character be tragic than this.

which brings me to his next punishment. i was happy to see michael again on the kahana (just happy to see him in general), but it didn't last long when he gets killed, sacrificing himself to prevent/prolong the kahana's explosion from happening. (put a 📌 on this bc it's similar to how sayid dies and we'll come back to that later.) michael dies here and walt doesn't know about this. and then michael joins as part of the whispers, his soul trapped on the island (presumably forever) and that's why he's not in the church ending.

i'm gonna be frank. michael being trapped on the island because of his guilt or remorse or perhaps repenting for his sins is just bullshit to me. a lot of characters seen in the flash sideways and in the church ending are characters who've done "bad things". it's bullshit to have michael be the only one doomed to pay for his misdeeds forever. his misdeeds for... killing two people. not that killing two people is Nothing, but moreso if you examine the circumstances it's hardly anything to be damned eternally for.

remember the 📌 we had wrt sayid and michael? both of them died trying to prevent an explosion from reaching everybody else. which makes this more egregious imo. i can say 1000 things about sayid's arc (points to url), but this is about michael and not him, so i'll just focus on this: sayid was grappling with "being a bad person" for torturing and killing so many people. he worked as an assassin for ben. and yet, somehow, you're telling me sayid is not being damned eternally for his misdeeds but michael is? if you don't see the BS in that i don't know what to tell you.

i'm also aware why some characters don't appear any more re:conflicts with their actors (or just availabilities or other reasons for declining to come back), but even then arguably any conflicts with harrold perrineau stemmed from a justified place because of how michael was treated.

i think mr eko had a more dignified arc (he's one of my fav characters, thematically speaking) and honestly he had some of the rawest shit i've ever heard:

I ask for no forgiveness father for I have not sinned, I have only done what I needed to do to survive. A small boy once asked me if I was a bad man, if I could answer him now I would tell him, that when I was a young boy I killed a man to save my brothers life. I am not sorry for this, I am proud of this. I did not ask for the life that I was given but it was given none the less, and with it I did my best.

but despite this it doesn't change the fact that his absence in the church ending is very noticeable. he had meaningful connections with charlie, with locke, and interestingly like michael he kind of parallels sayid but this time thematically through their arcs. sayid is constantly burdened with feeling like he's a bad person and resigning to it as some sort of self-fulfilled prophecy, but mr eko is very firm about how he sees himself as not necessarily a bad man, just a man whose hands were forced because of the cards he was dealt. i wish we could have seen a more direct parallel between them, because it would've been interesting. back to the main point: i think it's such a missed opportunity for mr eko to not be here. especially since even after his death, hurley was able to communicate with his ghost, showing that he still had connections with his fellow losties even long after his death.

ana lucia being "not ready to move on" is interesting. but ultimately you can't help but raise a few eyebrows at it anyway. you can argue that, unlike mr eko she died an unresolved death, but most of the LOST characters died with an unresolved death. (she was killed early.) that's the whole point of the sideways segments. so what makes ana lucia so different from the others? yeah she killed shannon, but that was completely a freak accident. her people (the tailies) were being picked off one by one by the other so she was understandably on edge. she was kind of a hated character but i think a lot of it is just racism and misogyny combined tbh. (LOST is...notorious for a lot of misogynistic character writing decisions.) ana lucia was just as complex and morally "ambiguous" as the rest of them. i find the decision to make her corrupt in the sideways segments interesting (negative). cz like, there was never any indication she was like this in real life. what does that corruption symbolize? because obviously that corruption is a key to why she "can't move on yet". what exactly is she supposed to be repenting for? they hinted at a possible direction her arc is going towards before killing her off, ie. her ultimately choosing not to kill "henry gale" because she no longer wants blood on her hands. again, in a way, she's just like sayid! someone who decided they'd turn away from ceaseless violence. only right afterwards she got killed. so what does she need repenting for so much that she's left out of the church ending? much to think about.

i don't really know how to conclude this post. but my main point is that the lack of these characters during the church ending is and has racist implications. (again, i understand the casting issues, but it's still a writing decision you can critique as a viewer at the end of the day). i'll try to find the old posts i made last year abt michael and mr eko and their parallels to sayid and link them here (and self reblog).

edit: go read/look up "burn it down". it details a lot of the behind the scenes mistreatment of the staff (including racism and sexism), including actors and writers. the quote from an interview from harold perrineau that i mentioned was also linked in a reblog. (post link)

[itsclydebitches]

I know there's a lot to unpack in James' new interview but I am feral, FERAL I SAY, over this fucking line right here:

"His need was to be loved, and his tragic flaw was the belief that he was unlovable."

Back before Season 3 hit and Tedependent became ~trendy~ (not actually lol) I was heacanoning and writing Trent as a pretty anxious individual, someone with a ton of internalized self-loathing whose "whole vibe" was more of a mask than legitimate self-confidence. At the time I worried about him coming across as too OOC because really, what did we have to support this? Ted Lasso's prevailing theme of men discovering love and support when they previously had none? The lovely parallel of Trent struggling with many of Ted's own flaws, but presenting in opposite ways (cutting cynicism vs. endless optimism)? The then—far less developed—comments from James that Trent might have a rough relationship with his father? It felt unsubstantiated, unpersuasive, built more on my own interest in those kinds of characters and the occasional awkward moment from Trent than actual canon. Even into Season 3 I questioned whether my reading of him as struggling, significantly, with the care Ted offers wasn't just a result of my own, imagined inner life for him.

But NOW.

I'm sorry, hold up, can I just re-confirm that TRENT'S TRAGIC FLAW IS HIS BELIEF THAT HE'S UNLOVABLE? Unlovable??? Thank you, James Lance, for validating every reading I've had of this character since he first appeared on screen. Do people realize the depth this adds to every interaction Trent has? Particularly with Ted? Unlovable Trent Crimm starts off this relationship with a sincere compliment on his style ("I like your glasses"), something that Season 3 will present as a core part of his personality, something he's largely hidden away. Unlovable Trent Crimm grappling with the fact that yes, Ted enjoyed spending time with him. Him. WHILE he was playing the part of the asshole journalist. Unlovable Trent not being rejected when he admits, in moments of vulnerability, that he "Loves [their] chats." Unlovable Trent having his father's (likely snide) "Independent" comment reframed as a fun pun + advice to follow his "bliss": you have support, Trent, no matter what you choose to do. I don't care if you're successful covering a masculine-coded sport, I care if you're happy. Unlovable Trent committing the ultimate betrayal and being forgiven for it, immediately. Unlovable Trent being forcibly integrated into the Richmond family; actively accepted rather than passively tolerated: yes you should work here, yes you're a Diamond Dog, sit your butt down, Trenthouse Magazine, you will never be excluded again.

I'm sorry for the rambling post but I'm just so!! Insane about this!!! So much of Trent's hesitance could have been written off as a result of his career. That is, it might have been merely a learned reaction after decades of deliberately pissing people off. Of course they dislike him, but take him out of that environment and everything's fixed. Yet James has confirmed that he played Trent as intrinsically believing this. The career was a result of that unfounded fear—Might as well keep people at a distance before they hurt me first—as well as, simultaneously, a desire to somehow achieve the love that should have been unconditional from the start—Maybe my father will like me if I can be that "alpha male man's man" in print. Because this isn't just a flaw, it's a tragic flaw, a literary term that denotes a deficiency that leads to the character's downfall. This belief is so entrenched that it has led to Trent actively self-sabotaging his chances of being loved in the first place; a horrible self-fulfilling prophecy. He NEEDED someone like Ted—a fucking love sledgehammer that forces people to accept his care in the least subtle ways possible, even when they're acting as their own worst enemy—and by god, he got him!

Aside from Nate, Trent has always felt like the most isolated character to me at the start of the series (and even Nate has a good relationship with his mother and sister). What we've learned in Season 3 and James' interviews has only reinforced that reading for me: he was closeted in his marriage, unintentionally hurting his daughter, he's suffering under his father's expectations, he hates the press persona he's created to survive, he's bored at his job, footballers and other potential interviewees despise him—and not without reason (Roy). He has no friends that we see pre-Richmond and he's reached a point where the simple act of someone saying that they liked spending the day with him—again, while he's actively TRYING to piss them off and keep his distance—has him in such a state of shock he runs for the door, pens an uncharacteristically hopeful write-up, and is well on his way to upending his entire life for that man.

Because of course he is!!! From Trent's perspective Ted is a fucking impossibility shaped into human form. This is a man in his 40s whose greatest lifelong fear—now all but a certainty at his age—has been dismantled in a matter of hours. I'd write a book-length love letter to him too! And RIP to finale!Trent, but I would have run fucking Rom-Com style after the man who not only changed my life, but my entire sense of self-worth. (Ah fuck, but there's that tragic flaw again, keeping Trent hesitant. I now stand by my reading of the "I'll leave you be" scene as an unrequited goodbye.)

But finale aside, the man who'd convinced himself he was unlovable fell for the man who was love incarnate.

If that's not the most romantic shit you've ever heard idk what is!!!

[imminent-danger-came]

MK Breaking his 1x01 Seal (I am insane)

Soooooooooooooo *twirls my hair and kicks my legs*.

I made this post like, a day ago, about a theory where the seal Wukong places on MK in 1x01 was broken in 4x07. The more I've been thinking about it, the more I think it might actually be the case, so here's a more in-depth post on it!

Let's start off with looking at how powerful MK starts off in 1x00 "A Hero is Born".

He's zipping around, he's punching the Demon Bull King with incredible force, and his final blow to DBK shifts the planets and cracks the earth:

This use of power is clearly uncontrolled. MK pretty much levels a good portion of megapolis, and in the next episode 1x01 Bad Weather, he needs a seal to be placed on his powers in order to function.

Now, we don't ever see MK that powerful again, not until after this moment in 4x07:

Between this and Sun Wukong's 1x09 comment when MK uses the staff to further destroy the mural—"Look kid, using that much power, your body can't handle it."—I'm thinking MK's seal in 1x01 also sealed away his monkey form, and that in 4x07 he broke that seal.

Bonus kinda scary MK shot:

Now, there are also these scenes in 4x13 during MK's fight with Azure:

There are a number of outer-space/world shots in this show, typically used at climactic points to show how overwhelming the battle is. In both 1x00 and 4x13, these shots are prompted by MK alone. The exception to this is 3x14 (and 3x11, more on that later), where everyone working together makes one giant magic circle to stop the Lady Bone Demon, engulfing the whole universe in light.

Next, we have the seals.

Now, it's very intriguing to me that these two seals are the same in design. The Chinese characters on both of course mean "seal", but the rim around them is also the exact same. It's a very interesting design choice, and something that could have easily been avoided had the intention been to not draw a connection between the flower fruit mountain seal and MK's seal.

(It could be that they wanted to keep Monkey King's seals consistent, however this is what the waterfall seal looks like in 1x00 and 2x01: )

(These are different, meaning the LMK team explicitly chose the seals from 1x01, 4x01, and "The Emperors Wrath" special to look the same.)

Here's what especially get's me: this same seal is used to seal away both MK's powers, and to seal away the powers of the Jade Emperor.

Mei with the Samadhi fire and Azure Lion with the Jade Emperor's power had both characters acting as containers for their world ending power source (here's that pesky 3x11 outer-space shot I mentioned):

Mei: "You mean—if I lost my cool on any of the million training exercises we've been doing, there was a chance I could have exploded and destroyed the whole universe?" Red Son: "Yes, that could have happened, but it didn't. My guess is that somehow your dragon ancestry has protected you. And if your strong enough to contain the samadhi fire, your strong enough to use it."

(3x11 This Imperfect World) (Gonna be real I don't think it was Mei's dragon ancestry that protected her, I think it was MK, but that's a theory for another time lol)

-

However Azure, unlike Mei, fails as a container. He fails to control his power, almost destroying the whole universe and sacrificing his life to stitch the world back together.

You know who ALSO doesn't control his power at the cost of others?

MK, even if it is on a much smaller scale, loses control of his powers in 1x01:

And, he loses control of them so much so that he needs to put that same specific seal on his powers until he can learn to control them better.

And well, the moment that seal comes off? We get this:

MK grappling to control his powers and a shot of him in a crater. Interesting!

And so, now that MK's seal has broken (assuming any of this theory is correct lol), I think he's going to struggle to be a container for his own powers. He was already frighteningly explosive against Azure, causing irreparable damage to flower fruit mountain and literally splitting it in half:

He also happens to look like this before entering his monkey form:

If that doesn't look like "struggling to contain his own powers", I don't know what does!

[bambiilooza]

okay so ii thought this would be fun soooo

what epic saga is ur fav nd least fav, what is ur fav song in each saga, ur least fav in each saga, your overall fav and least fav

feel free to ramble and/or go off on a tangent about hidden meanings i fw that shit very hard

oh boy. these were really hard to narrow down. thanks for this ask btw, it was fun!!

my fav saga :

the underworld!! ik it's the shortest but each song is such a banger and it's the only one for where each song gets better from the last. all three of the songs are in my top 10 easy.

the polites cameo broke ppl's hearts ik but it was amazing to hear steven in the role again. i love his voice. anticlea was amazing too.

no longer you was actual fire. i LOVE epic's version of tirisias a lot and his voice is perfect. the orchestration in that song is actually beautiful and both actors absolutely kill it.

and monster? oh i'll take about monster later

least fav saga :

cyclops saga. i like it but i don't have strong feelings about the songs except for my goodbye. plot wise, it's important ofc but i dont find myself listening to it as often cuz it's just sad. i do like all the songs tho

i will say polyamorous the cyclops sounds REALLY GOOD in the remastered version. woah what a voice improvement holy moly

i really love my goodbye tho. that song is in my top 10. the 'YOU'RE ALONE!' is actually insane. i need like a 100 animatics for it. it's too good.

fav song in each saga :

just a man

i LOVE jay's performance here. this song made me cry when i first listened to it. i mean it's just everything.

i think most ppl thought 'oh musical about odyssey call epic probably silly boyish fun' and for the most part horse and the infant leads u on with that. then THIS SONG happens and ur crying on the floor.

i love watching animatics for it too. unlike most songs in epic, there is no action in this song, it's pure agony of a man grappling with one of the hardest things anyone can do and it's fucking amazing.

and i said it before just now but the VOCALS. stunning. perfect. jaw dropping.

in my ideal epic animated movie, what i want is for horse and the infant and just a man BEFORE the title card drop. and when ody sings the last line of just a man, it fades to the title screen. then it would be daytime and full speed ahead can happen.

idk if that makes sense but i think it would slay so hard.

my goodbye

OH MY GOD. THIS SONG. IT IS HEARTBREAKING

the callbacks to warrior of the mind takes me by surprise everytime like holy shit she really just said that?? then ody's 'YOU'RE ALONE!'

it's perfect. the pure rage from both of them is just so good.

it's my favourite saga ender. it's so cold and just wow. like athena was in one song before but the EMOTION from both of them is enough to make u wanna cry.

ruthlessness

see one part of my brain is like 'oh that's interesting the villain and hero have conflicting moralities and the hero may become like the villain and he is establishing the hero's thinking as flawed for his purpose.' then the other half of my brain is dead from how much steven rodriguez SLAYS the performance.

the lyrics are great as with all the song. the callback to remember them? chef's kiss. poseidon really sat down with his son and took notes for his villain number lol

but my fav things about it the performance. the poseidon voice is so so so so good. and i'm not saying it in a 'haha i find it hot' way. i mean i do but also, it's just perfect for poseidon. he sounds like if salt could talk and that's a compliment btw. his sass and personality is great too.

'but noooo' i just. i love poseidon's voice so much.

and i am shaking in my boots for get in the water.

there are other ways

i love the route jay went with the plot. this portrayal of circe is so important to me, i love her sm. i read the circe book just before the circe saga - and i liked it overall - but the ending left a horrible taste in my mouth so this was a very welcome change.

it's so well done. our boy ody '🥺my wife🥺'-ing his way out of the situation? perfect. ik it's more complicated but the end of the circe saga is such a good character moment for him.

and CIRCE. CIRCE MY QUEEN ILY.

her sympathising with ody and helping him is great. i love that she gets fleshed into, why she does what she does and when she sees the good in ody. she really is a loving queen and i love her sm.

her vocals - especially at the end - are stunning. i love tayla sindal's voice for circe. like with poseidon, that is the perfect voice for the character.

i really love gigi's animatic of this song and that's just how i imagine it happening. it's actually perfect. my fav song was a tie between this and done for but the animatic made me fall in love with this one.

monster

odysseus gives into the pam pam 🦖🦖

it's my favourite song in epic. i have a LOT of thoughts on it but i actually cannot put them into words.

mutiny

this one is fresh so my thoughts will not be cohesive. the amount of callbacks in this song actually kills me.

i cried at the livestream. exactly at the lyric 'ody we're never gonna get to make it home' i mean.

ODY. ODY not CAPTAIN. I CAN'T END THIS. poor choice of words nm

but i will say i've seen some takes on eurylochus that i definately do not agree with and he's one of my fav characters. i'm sad he's gone, his acting and presence was amazing and underrated in all the other sagas and he's just a great character.

least fav in each saga:

i like all of these songs btw. i don't dislike any song. i don't wanna got into detail cuz for all the answer is just i like the others more.

full speed ahead

polyphemous

storm

wouldn't you like

the underworld

different beast

winner : monster

second place : there are other ways

third place : ruthlessness

my overall least favourite song : polyphemous/different beast. again i like these songs, i just prefer others

[superfanficnatural]

The Son: Chapter 24

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Male!Reader (The Son)

Summary: You’ve finally broken free of the forces controlling you at a great cost, though the cost of doing so was even greater than you thought. Now, you fight for the antithesis of what you had been representing, and have to grapple with finding your own place in the galaxy while grappling with the person trying to find their way into your heart. Will The Son choose the light? Or the dark? Whatever the answer may be, may the force be with us.

A/N: I screamed while writing this, then again while getting ready to write this author note because… THE SMUT IS FINALLY HERE!!! I am so sorry this took ages, school has been kicking my ass and this smut was testing me, but I hope that it’s good enough to make up for lost time! While I knew this was gonna be a slowburn series, I did not expect it to take this long even though yeah they've been together for a few chapters by now... but oh well?? Also, this chapter was beta’d by the lovely @h1gh-funct1on1ng-soc1opath !! So huge shoutout and thank you to them! Check out their amazing works as well for more male reader and beyond! As always, I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: Fluff, SMUT, NSFW (18+), Kissing, Rimming, Fingering, Unprotected Sex, Breeding, Dirty Talk, End of the world sex? lol, Choking, Biting, Overstimulation, Masturbation/Mutual, Rough Sex AND Soft Sex?, Praise???, Slight Possessiveness?

Word Count: 6,782

Italics are your thoughts

Masterpost

“What?” you could see Poe’s heart drop.

Your connection to the force was finally rectified and you felt it clear as day; Leia was gone, “I don’t understand...”

You wondered if the Resistance had been attacked or something along those lines until the connection became clearer to you. It wasn’t as if you could see or hear anything, necessarily, but the information was given to you intuitively. She had given her life in hopes to save her son. 

“Where’s Rey?” 

Poe didn’t respond for a few moments, still swallowing what he thought he heard you say before coughing it up, “She... she went after the wayfinder but Kylo came. They fought but we couldn’t see clearly. We don’t know what happened to Kylo but we saw Rey take off in his ship.”

Maybe Leia transferred her life energy to Kylo after Rey struck him down? Impossible, force healing requires direct touch, let alone the incredible distance she was away. She must have projected herself outwards to try to connect with him, knowing that he most likely... didn’t have much time before he truly fell to the dark side. And where did Rey go? She wouldn’t just abandon us… I have to trust she knows what she’s doing, we have enough to worry about right now.

“Poe, I’m sorry.” You walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, “General Leia is gone. She gave the last of her strength to reach Kylo one last time.”

He kept his eyes locked on yours while you spoke, trying to see if there was any hint of uncertainty in your gaze while he fell into his shock. He finally broke your gaze and looked to the floor while his hand came up to rest on yours, releasing a huff of breath which he was most likely holding while you spoke. 

“How are we supposed to do this without her?” he whispered. “And now we’ve probably lost the wayfinder, Rey is AWOL...”

“Hey, we’ll do whatever we can, ok?” Your other hand came up to his cheek to bring his eyes back to you, “We’ll go back to base, regroup, come up with something. We have to.”

His eyes were filled with vulnerability as they met yours, “Y/N, I...”

You knew his feelings exactly, the fear that you would lose this war and ultimately, each other, “I know. Let’s not go there just yet. Catch me up on everything else.”

He nodded while he blinked a few times, sniffling, “We fixed the ship enough to take back off and we’re heading back to the Resistance.”

“What about Jannah and the rest of them?” you questioned.

“Turns out, all former Finns, they defected as well. Left them behind but with our number, I think we can count on their help,” Poe explained.

You hummed while nodding before you talked for a short while longer, knowing that you had to go break the news to Chewie as well. It was painful, Leia was one of Chewie’s oldest friends, and one of the only remaining ones after Han and Luke had died. The cries he let out were the most gut wrenching you had heard in any species, and you were there for him with Poe along with Finn after telling him as well.

It was a difficult ride back through hyperspace for all of you, memories of your time with Leia coming back to you nostalgically. Though, not long after everyone became aware, the ship had exited hyperspace and was back on Ajan Kloss.

After landing the ship, your group all came out defeatedly. Your endeavor only resulted in nothing, and the Resistance that you were coming back to didn’t have your incredible General to welcome you either. Lieutenant Connix was there to greet your team with a solemn expression on her face as well. She was leadership in the Resistance almost as long as Leia was involved, making her one of Leia’s closest confidants in the Resistance. They must have been very close.  

“There’s terrible news,” she informed.

“We know,” Poe sighed. “The Resistance has lost its best leader.”

She pursed her lips slightly and sighed, “It’s not just Leia. Come with me.”

You and Poe shared a concerned look before taking off after her, Chewie going off somewhere else as he was still processing his grief and Finn heading elsewhere. Following Connix, you eventually reached central command, a bunch of stations set up outside near the cave entrance in the jungle. Waiting for you there were Rose and Beaumont, another high ranking Resistance member in intelligence. 

He was the one who spoke as you arrived, “Kijimi has been destroyed.”

You gasped and Poe took a step forward hurriedly, “Kijimi? How?”

“A blast from a star destroyer,” Connix explained. “A ship from the new Sith fleet. Out of the unknowns.”

Poe turned and sighed, his eyes closing defeatedly while Beaumont circled, “The Emperor sent a ship from Exegol. Does that mean every ship in the fleet...”

“Has planet killing weapons,” Poe finished his line of thought. “Of course they do. All of them, this is how he finishes it.”

Even now that you’ve re-established your connection with your dark nature, you felt more confident though. Even if you were to unleash your full power at what you knew was the incoming nexus event, would even that be enough to win the war?

“To believe he was capable of something of this scope,” you thought out loud, thinking back to how you feared the worst out of him after his actions years ago.

One of the monitors began to chime and Rose leaned over to check on it, “Listen.”

Everyone quieted down and walked closer to the monitor as it was playing an audio message. 

“It’s on every frequency,” Rose mentioned as she flipped through the channels.

While everyone listened intently, Beaumont began to translate, “The Resistance is dead. The Sith flame will burn. All worlds surrender or die. The Final Order begins.”

“Leia made you acting General,” Rose aimed her words at Poe.

You looked at him, seeing the visible strain on his face from such losses and what was to come. Things were becoming dire, and you didn’t know what you could do to stop it.

“What now?” Rose asked.

The makeshift meeting had adjourned with Poe not being able to answer the question. He stood there for a few moments trying to think of something before he let out a grunt and said to keep working. As he walked away, he made sure to turn his face towards you and make eye contact, signaling that he wanted you to follow.

You looked around the room to Beaumont, Connix, and Rose before giving them a sympathetic look and leaving to follow Poe. His pace wasn’t exactly slow as he seemingly wanted to get out of there quickly, leaving you to already try and catch up to him after leaving.

Before long, though, you had come up to him and walked beside him, turning your head to look at him. He turned his head to meet your eyes and you were shocked to see them filled with vulnerability. Without being able to get a really good look at it, he turned his head back to focus on walking. It seemed like he was about to cry to you and your heart sank in your chest. 

You hadn’t noticed it but he was walking in the direction to his room and before long, he opened the door and went inside without a word, leaving you to follow and close the door behind him, “Baby, please talk to me.”

He turned back to face you once you had closed the door and you were met with the same glazed eyes, “I don’t know what to do.” He sighed and raised his hands up to his face, covering them with his fingers and muffling his speech, “I can’t lead all of us. This is probably suicide no matter what, anyways.”

You came forward to take a hold of his hands and remove them softly from his face, forcing him to look at you, “Hey, take a breath.” A tear escaped from his eye and your heart cracked in your chest, “Oh, Poe. Leia wouldn’t have entrusted you to lead if she didn’t believe that you could do it.”

He sniffled, breaking his gaze before returning it to yours with a different look, “I don’t want to lose you. We don’t have enough people or manpower to win this war, I don’t want to lose you.” 

He whispered his final words as his voice threatened to break, his eyes shutting closed, fresh tears escaping from his lashes. 

Your eyes wet with your own tears, your heart reflecting his thoughts in the feelings it gave you, “I know, I know.” You placed your forehead on his, “We’ll make it through this. Together.”

The two of you held pressure against one another, the closeness chipping away at the sadness eating at you both. The room was silent and you couldn’t focus on anything but the feeling of Poe’s hands in your own, your breaths mingling against one another, the emotional hurricane that the two of you were in the eye of .

Your eyes opened shortly after his and while you separated a few millimeters, the two of you maintained your closeness. No words were exchanged between you, only the train ride of intensity your eyes were burning into each other with.

A glance down at your lips had a nerve spike up your back and prompted you to do the same, looking down at Poe’s soft lips. You weren’t sure if you had inched closer or if he did but your lips connected like magnets, fitting together as if you had been kissing already. 

The rush of emotions, along with the tears, had made your body more sensitive, and his lips felt divine in that moment. Every brush of them, the suction of them, the slight feel of his stubble at the edges of your lips, it was a delight that had you desperate for more.

Your lips parted for the first time and you let out a gasp, the breath you were holding nearly bursting from your lungs. Poe had done much of the same, his warm breath cascading over your neck and sending goosebumps down your chest. He took the opportunity to snake his hands out of yours and pull them around your body, holding you close. In this exchange, your hands came up to cup his face, your thumb wiping a tear that had fallen.

“I love you, Y/N Y/L/N,” he whispered.

“I love you too, Poe Dameron,” you returned with just as much love.

Both of you leaned back for more as the next kiss seemed more hungry than the last; Poe’s once soft and loving kiss turning into a deep and passionate one. It made your cock jump in your jeans and heat to rush through you. Moaning into the kiss, he took the opportunity to snake his tongue in and get a taste of you. While you had been completely inexperienced before, you had kissed Poe many times by now and had gotten pretty used to it. Sex, however... the two of you had not tried yet. His hands tightened around you and you felt a moan rise from deep in his chest.

“I need you,” Poe just barely made out the words before diving right back in for another kiss.

The overwhelming passion that burned through the two of you was something neither of you had felt before. Never had the two of you needed another person so badly, had craved everything that they had to offer so much, needed them more than the air that you had breathed.

He turned the two of you around and the back of your legs hit the edge of the bed, Poe easing you down onto the bed while you crawled up to get comfortable. Poe followed you the entire way before reaching down and grabbing the hem of his shirt and raising it over his head, tossing it to the side. His gorgeous bronze body stood over you now, your eyes appreciating the hair traveling down his happy trail. 

“Eyes up here,” Poe managed a smirk, reaching his hands down to pull your shirt up under you as well.

You blushed slightly and allowed him to help you out of your shirt, plopping back down on the bed with Poe’s arms now resting on the sides of your head. His face was just above yours and he smiled lovingly down at you, one of his hands coming to comb through your hair and push it back before plunging down and kissing you again. Your hands came up to his sides and began to stroke at the skin, affectionately trying to hold him close.

Knowing that this might be the first and... last time that the two of you could be like this, it made the moment all the more special. The two of you knew exactly what you were at risk of losing and it made all of your inhibitions fade away. 

“I know we haven’t-” Poe began.

“I want to do it,” you stopped him, knowing what he was talking about.

He smiled back at you, “Are you sure?”

“I am. I want... I want you inside me,” you blushed, never speaking so lewdly before.

Poe’s eyes widened at your bold words, never knowing you were capable of it. His cock raged hard in his pants and he was shocked by how effective it was to him, “Anything for you.”

Poe had wanted this for months, and so had you, but Poe knew you weren’t quite ready. It  wasn’t exactly easy having a moment to yourselves ever, constantly either on mission or doing something separately. 

Poe couldn’t help but kiss you again, moaning into it as the promise of what was to come excited him. While you did feel a bit nervous about your first time, you were actually thankful that your recent mission had you not eating for a while. Though the main reason was because you were with Poe, because you could trust him with everything that you had.

Your slightly shaky hands reached down to start unbuckling his belt and you managed it thankfully easily, before unbuttoning his pants and unzipping. By then, Poe had broken the kiss and moved his hands down after getting off of you to pull his pants down, getting them to the bottom before realizing he had to unlace his boots. You noticed yours were still on as well and you moved to unlace and toss them to the side along with your socks and pants around the same time Poe had removed his. Now, Poe was back on top of you with only his tight underwear on, his ridiculous bulge clearly seen to the eye. 

Your eyes widened slightly and Poe noticed it, “It’s ok. I’m not gonna hurt you.” He leaned down to place a soft kiss on your lips before moving to pepper kisses along your neck, “I’ll make sure you’re ready for me.”

You leaned your head to the side as your eyes drooped closed, a satisfied breath escaping your throat at his actions, your cock bobbing in your own underwear. 

As his head was aimed downwards to kiss your neck, he noticed your cock jerk in your underwear, “Looks like I’m the one who should be nervous for next time.”

You blushed and let out a small laugh, “I like the sound of next time.”

He returned his gaze to you at that, the love in his eyes shining heavier than before. Bending back down to kiss you, he pressed his hips down and rubbed the two of your cocks together through the fabrics. The friction felt delicious and you moaned into the kiss, Poe’s tongue exploring your mouth. Pre-cum leaked from your cock, throbbing and hard since basically the first kiss, leaving a wet pool on your underwear. 

Poe broke from the kiss and reached over to the table next to the bed, popping open a shelf and grabbing something from inside. He placed it down next to you and you looked over to see that it was lube. While you were looking over, Poe had grabbed at your underwear and pulled it down in one smooth motion before you had time to even react. You turned back and he had a smirk on his face before he grabbed your thighs and pushed forward. It forced your back to curl up and your upper half to press a bit into the bed, somewhat holding you in place. 

You gasped and Poe had a full grin on his face now, the slightest twinge of hunger behind his teeth, “This is a cockpit I plan on commandeering.”

You blushed at the ridiculousness of his words but couldn’t even open your mouth to get your response out before he plunged his tongue into you. Your back arched and your eyes squeezed shut, it was an incredible feeling. The prodding of his tongue into your hole, the gripping of his hands on your thighs to keep you in place while he dug into you. It was all new to you and while it was slightly off-putting for a brief moment, it immediately turned into pleasure. 

“Poe,” you weakly moaned, your abdomen seizing randomly as the pleasure coursed through you.

His eyes were initially focused on the same thing his tongue was, devouring your ass, until he heard your sweet moan grace his ears. He had made you moan in many different ways before but this was different; you sounded truly vulnerable and his cock involuntarily jumped. The moment he looked up to meet your eyes, he struggled to keep a moan from escaping his chest at seeing your flushed and weak state. His tongue swirled and licked stripes across the inside of your cheeks, slipping as deep into your hole as he could get, pulling more strained whines to flow through your throat.

He would alternate every once in a while and blow on your hole, making you hiss with the cool sensation before he dove right back in. If you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought he grew out his stubble for this purpose exactly. As he tongued you, his chin and cheeks brushed against the back of your balls and the inside of your thighs.

He even went as far as driving a stripe up your hole with his chin, the short hairs sending your sensitive hole into a frenzy before returning with his tongue and soothing the sharp sensation. Your hands were clutching the sheets around you with a death grip, trying your hardest to try and relax your muscles down there for him.

“You look perfect, so absolutely perfect,” he managed a mutter before plunging back in for another taste.

You moaned loudly at his newfound passionate intrusion and one of your hands flung up to grip in between your legs at his hair, holding on for dear life. Poe moaned into you as the slight sting on his scalp made his cock jolt in his underwear, basically soaked completely through with the amount of pre-cum he was leaking.

The both of you were pleasantly astonished, you because you had never felt pleasure like this before, and Poe because, even with women, he had never been so lost in his senses like he was right now with you. If it weren’t for the perfect specimen in front of him, Poe would have been lost in thought of how he never tried it with men before. But he knew the answer to that without even having to think about it, it was because it was you. 

“Poe, please,” you wished you could manage more than the repetition of ‘please’ along with his name but you were completely lost to his advances on you.

He growled against you, his own impatience further driven by your own. One of his hands that he was using to hold your thighs rushed down to his underwear, which he haphazardly shoved down his legs in one push. Because your leg was no longer supported, it dropped down. As Poe straightened his back to press up against you, it came to naturally wrap around his hip while the other remained in his grip.

Poe looked down at you, legs spread for him, hole puckering and wet, face flushed with pleasure and body heaving with your breaths and wished he could burn the image into his memory. But his boy was waiting for him, and he wouldn’t make him wait any longer than necessary, as he was just as impatient. 

“Grab that bottle, sweetheart,” Poe’s raspy voice asked of you.

His voice was deeper than usual and you could feel the rasp in his chest against your leg, sending a shiver throughout your body. His eyes, while soft and caring, had a deep, unsatiated need behind them. You felt as if he was barely able to hold himself back and it made your body thrum with excitement.

Reaching over to the bottle that was near your head, you timidly offered it to him while looking down at your chest, feeling a slight wave of embarrassment. Poe had caught on and smiled slightly. Idiot, he thought to himself before he softly dropped the other leg he was holding to the side and guided it around his hips to lock with your other leg. 

He grabbed the bottle with one hand and dipped forward with his body, using his other hand to grab at your chin. He peppered a few kisses along your jawline before his lips came just before yours and he looked into your eyes, “Look at me.” You pulled your gaze up at him and blushed once more, his eyes so close it took up most of your vision before his lips faintly pulled into another smile, “I love you.”

“I love you to-” you immediately went to respond, but were silenced by Poe’s lips surging forward to claim yours. 

Moaning into the kiss, you wrapped your arms around his neck, your ankles locking around his back to press him as close to you as you could. Your tongues brushed and swept against each other as the suction in your lips pulled more and more noises to come from you and Poe. Because he had reached forward, his now bare cock was pressing up against your hole as he grinded against you.

Poe tightly gripped the bottle that he held, pressed against the bed to help hold his weight while his aching cock begged to push into the tightness in front of it. The other hand, once on your chin, now slightly applied pressure against your neck.

Poe broke the kiss by applying a bit more pressure with his fingers, forcing your neck to slightly crane up and give him access. He dug his face in, his stubble brushing against your sensitive skin while his lips and tongue left marks as deep as he could.

“I’m yours, completely,” he muttered before biting down on your carotid.

You yelped slightly into a moan from the sudden action, unable to even form a reply as Poe held you so tightly, so possessive yet gentle, while his ministrations on your neck had you nearly passing out.

“And you’re mine, right? I wanna hear you say it, Y/N,” his words seemed as if they were intended to come across dominating but, instead, came out more desperate than anything.

You finally managed the strength to respond, “I’m yours, Poe. All yours.”

He let out a deep moan, a satiated one, before you felt his cock physically pulse against you, making your eyes roll to the back of your head. Without stopping his onslaught on your throat, Poe snaked his arm out from your throat and moved his other arm over, expertly popping open the lube bottle with one hand while squeezing it into the other. You hadn’t even noticed all of this with your eyes shut in pleasure, Poe’s lips unrelenting and traveling across every plane and crook of your neck.

After he felt enough lube pressed onto his finger, Poe reached his arm down towards your hole, backing his hips up just slightly and leaving your lower section colder than you liked. However, that cold was suddenly replaced by a new coldness against your aching heat, making you yelp out. Poe smirked against your neck.

The cold quickly transitioned to warmth as he began massaging the lube around the area of your hole, using a finger to rub circles directly on it, sending an animalistic feeling crawling up your stomach. Before long, his finger inched past the ring of your muscles, softly massaging the flesh inside. Once again, the intrusion felt extremely foreign but pleasurable all the same, your back arching into Poe in response.

He smirked against your throat once more, nipping at the skin before taking your lips in another kiss. As he did, he inserted a second finger, silencing your yelp with his own mouth. His warmth was welcomed as you let the kiss distract you from the probing of his fingers. 

“You’re doing so good,” Poe muttered into your lips. His fingers curled upwards a few inches inside of you, “It won’t be long now.”

You moaned loudly, your muscles clenching reflexively as Poe took your lower lip into his teeth, biting down just slightly before he licked a warm flat stripe across the side of your lips and cheek. His two fingers were initially testing the waters with you, but they began to explore on their own accord, scissoring you and stretching you out as they wished. 

“Enough, please just f-fuck me,” you whimpered out, any sense of shame from your words or actions in this bedroom no longer a concern.

Poe flexed his fingers once more inside you, as if testing something, before he responded, “Ok baby, I won’t keep you waiting any longer.”

Your hands broke from his neck as he straightened back up, grabbing his cock with one hand while the other hand brought the lube bottle closer. His weight and warmth no longer covering you sent a shiver down your body and you eagerly waited for him, your legs still wrapped loosely around him. He squeezed more liquid out of the bottle directly onto the shaft of his cock and began to use his other hand to stroke slowly, spreading the lube across his length.

While doing so, your eyes became mesmerized by the sounds and sight in front of you, his large and calloused hands slowly stroking his huge cock plainly for you to see. Poe noticed the impatient and hungry look on your face and couldn’t help the smirk that graced his face while he looked down at you. His cock in his hands while he looked down at the person he loved the most, spread out and waiting for him; it made him harder than he had ever felt before. 

“I’m coming, sweetheart,” he cooed as he began to shift his weight forward again.

The bottle was tossed to the side of the bed, one of his arms coming up near your head to hold his weight in a fist while the other held his cock, aiming it in the direction it needed to be. At first, Poe couldn’t help but brush his cock up and down at your entrance, teasing and prodding the hole. Feeling his hard rod against you, teasing you, drove you insane, as all you wanted was it inside of you. 

“Sorry,” he bent down to place a firm kiss on your forehead with a slight chuckle. “I just want to savor every moment of this.”

A lazy smile graced your face before you intended to respond, opening your mouth but nothing coming out, instead a rush of breath. He had pushed past the ring of your entrance and held his head inside. It was much... much wider than his fingers, and they were wide already. 

Immediately, your body tensed up, and your hole tightened on him like a vice grip, your arms flinging right back round his neck and gripping. He growled and fought the urge to push forward in that moment. Instead, now that he was seated in you enough, he chose  to bring his other hand up to the other side of your head, allowing him to lean further down and reach you. You were a whimpering mess, unable to form words as the full feeling inside of you made your thoughts blank out.

“Shhhhh,” he placed a soft kiss on your nose. “It’s just us,” he comforted.

He didn’t move a centimeter, as much as his hips were screaming at him to do so as he let you acclimate to him. Your eyes were squeezed shut, fingers digging into Poe’s neck and shoulders as you tried to calm your body down. He laid butterfly kisses along your face the entire time, the little sensations gradually helping you relax around him. 

Eventually, your hole relaxed around him enough for movement and he pecked you on the lips, “Are you ready for me to move, sweetheart?”

Panting, you nodded, a strand of hair falling onto your forehead and sticking to the sweat, “Please, Poe.”

He kept his face against yours, not breaking his eye contact with you as his hips began to apply more forward pressure. The two of you panted heavily, Poe with the strain of holding back in your perfect warmth and you from the incredible fullness you were feeling. Gradually, he pushed deeper and deeper inside of you, and it wasn’t long before you felt like you couldn’t take any more.

“Poe,” you gasped as you felt him dangerously deep. “It’s too much.”

He shook his head and looked deep into your eyes, “My N/N can handle anything. We’re almost there, baby, you can take it.”

His words seduced your mind into believing him, or perhaps your mind already did in the first place, and simply needed some convincing. Feeling like he was nearly inside of your stomach, you had finally felt the familiar brush of his pubic hair against your thighs. You would have let out a sigh of relief if it hadn’t been for the spot he seemed to unlock deep inside of you with his last portion. The moan that came from your chest was as loud and deep as it was sudden, ripping from your throat with such force it shocked even you.

Poe grunted out a deep and long breath as he finally felt seated inside of you fully, completely connected with you in the deepest way possible. Shivers rampaged through your body and nearly made you begin to convulse, emanating outward from deep in your stomach and anus into the rest of your body. 

“P-P-Po-e,” your words stuttered like you were in the shivering cold, your entire body on fire with sensitivity.

“Does my cock reach that special spot, baby?” he muttered into your ear, voice low and almost threatening.

Knowing you were incapable of words, you nodded your head with fervor.

He chuckled darkly, “I’m taking advantage of that, just so you know.”

His hips retracted and slammed forward, his cock nearly escaping your hole before plunging back in. 

You screamed out and Poe brought one of his hands that was holding up his weight to come around your throat much like before, “Let me hear you, baby.”

He didn’t stop there, but instead began to keep a pace, fucking into you roughly like you had been going for hours already. If Poe’s plan was to take advantage of your overstimulation, he had succeeded. Let alone you were still reeling from the sensation you felt when he bottomed out in you as you never felt it before, you were forced to confront that sensation every half second as it was aggressively abused by Poe.

Your eyes began to lose focus and roll to the back of your head, your throat constricted with your muscles tightening and barely able to pull any breath. His hand wasn’t keeping your airflow out at all, pressing in expert spots that applied pressure stimulation without clogging up your throat. 

“No no, you’re not going anywhere,” Poe’s hand left your throat and moved to the back of your head, holding it firmly and tilting it back to face him. “I wanna see my work.”

Your cock, which you weren’t even able to fathom to think about, was bobbing fiercely, pre-cum leaking from your slit onto your stomach in waves. Whatever he was hitting was a button that ejected more pre-cum from you, every slam of his cock, balls deep, sending another slight rush of pre-cum forward.

Stars were dancing slightly in your vision but you managed to pull your gaze into Poe’s, his hand keeping your head steady helping for the most part. His eyes were the darkest you had ever seen them, pupils blown wide as he drank you in like water in a desert. He kept up his bruising pace all the same though, the sound of his hips slapping against you filthily filling the room.

You tried to get words out, but every time, they only came out as broken gasps, your jaw basically stuck in an O position. Poe was loving every second of it; the fact that he could break you apart like this so easily, and the look on your face... he nearly came on the spot. Though, he gave himself a break, and you as well, finally slowing his pace and only pulling out halfway before slowly edging his way back in.

You gasped, your lungs finally working like he had flicked the on switch. Poe gave you a chance to regain your breaths mingled with the moans from his slow and methodical movements, once again licking and sucking on your neck, one of his favorite spots he had come to find out. 

“I hope that wasn’t too much,” he softly kissed your skin, apologizing with his tenderness.

You shook your head without even thinking about it, “N... no it... it was so good.”

Poe had glanced down and you could feel the rumble of his chest, your eyebrow furrowing in confusion, “Whats-”

You looked down to see what he was looking at as he had looked back up at you, a goofy smile on his face. Looking at your stomach, there was a clear white liquid all over you, and not the transparent kind from pre-cum. You had orgasmed solely from his fucking just then, and you couldn’t even tell from how lost in your pleasure you were. 

“At least I’m doing my job right,” Poe quirked, tilting his chin up to kiss you.

You sighed contently into the kiss before it turned into a slight moan, his cock brushing up on your walls delicately. You only had a single orgasm yet your entire body was buzzing, your legs twitching ever so slightly. Let alone you were already emotional from what was going on, your stimulation had tears building up in your eyes, just barely holding back from falling onto your cheeks. 

“I love you so much, I can’t even explain it,” Poe admitted against your lips, accentuating the curve of his hips while he pumped into you.

“I love you, Poe. I love you so much,” you responded in tandem.

Your bodies had a cover of sweat, some of it falling from Poe’s hair onto your chest and neck. The room was hot, ignited by the passion between you, reflecting the fire you felt in your stomach. His hips began to pick up speed slowly, every thrust becoming harder, hungrier as your walls enclosed him in. The spot deep inside that he abused moments ago now felt more sensitive than before, hisses passing through your teeth from the stimulation.

Poe reached his left arm down to your cock, his right hand strained in the pillow next to you before he took it into his hands and began to stroke. Your hand reflexively tried to leave his neck and move his hand away as the feeling was simply too much, but Poe expected it. 

His hand left your cock only momentarily to grip your wrist and bring it back around his neck before returning his hand to your cock, “Keep your hands there.”

You whined, digging your fingers into his shoulder bruisingly, “Poe, it’s too much.”

He dipped again and claimed your lips, silencing you as his hand picked up speed, now nearly matching the speed of his thrusts. He curved his fingers expertly around your head each time his hand rose, and it was so sensitive it nearly hurt. You had already leaked an abysmal amount of pre-cum on top of cumming already, and you felt you had nothing left to give; but Poe was adamant in his efforts to prove that wrong. 

“I want to feel your cock pulse when you cum because of me,” Poe gritted against your lips, his words only sending you further down the depths of pleasure. 

You could feel Poe’s cock pulse within you, the veins of his cock pulsing and brushing against the ridges of your hole, his moans and growls growing louder as he approached his own climax. 

“I’m gonna cum, baby, can I?” he wanted nothing more than to breed your hole, to completely make you his, but he needed to make sure you wanted it too.

You nodded your head desperately, “Please, Poe. I want it inside me.”

Your own need for him to load you was the thing that sent Poe completely over the edge. With a loud moan, he rutted his hips as hard and deep as he possibly could and began to pump his seed. The sheer look of pleasure on Poe’s face along with feeling his warm cum filling you up sent you over the edge as well, your cock straining at full mass as it unloaded.

Your vision nearly went black from the force of your orgasm, let alone Poe’s cock slammed against your prostate, his cum pumping into you coated it completely, leaving a fuzzy feeling to emanate throughout your body. Your cock sputtered a good amount, the first sputter rising as far as your upper chest before the rest needily pumped over Poe’s fingers and onto your stomach.

Poe’s orgasm lasted far longer than yours, you could feel his cock jerking and pulsing in you for so long, more and more warm cum being released from his balls. Your eyes were stuck watching Poe’s frozen expression, his pleasure so heavy and consuming that his brain had trouble keeping up. His eyes were unfocused as all he could sense in that moment was his incredible orgasm, along with the feeling of your warm tightness around him.

After what felt like a minute or two, his cock finally stopped jumping and Poe gasped sharply, intaking heavy breaths as the muscles in his upper back and arms nearly gave out. You encouraged him, allowing his body to fall on top of yours, your cum now mingling between your warm and spent bodies. His face was pressed into the crook of your neck as his hips stayed pressed up against yours. Your legs remained wrapped around his hips loosely, his cum locked deep inside of you. His weight on top of you felt heavenly in that moment, and you reveled in the feeling of his strong and muscular frame encompassing you.

“I don’t think... anything in life will ever get close to that,” Poe managed out while trying to catch his breath. 

You smiled widely and warmly, your entire body relaxed and completely blissed out, “Only thing I can think of is doing it again.”

Poe’s cock twitched inside of you, the cock that was beginning to soften proving its resilience. 

You moaned deeply, completely overstimulated before Poe chuckled slightly, “Sorry, but that was your fault. Got me thinking.”

You chuckled weakly before heaving a satisfied sigh, closing your eyes and relaxing into the bed. One of your hands came up to start brushing at his hair and playing with the locks absentmindedly, Poe humming in contention. The moment the two of you shared was the most intimate and precious so far, and the both of you wanted to sit in it forever. However, you and Poe knew that there were pressing concerns, and they weren’t going to wait for you. 

“So, ready to save the galaxy or die trying?”

Next Chapter

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[wateroflifefrommountains]

Oh No, Grappling Hooks!!

I've figured it out, Cassandra Cain's kryptonite. What item was used to incapacitate her during the 1st few issues of Batgirls? It was a grappling hook, she got tied up in it. Bruce probably looked into the fight and learned that despite Cassandra's ability to read body language and, in turn, dodge bullets, she CANNOT dodge grappling hooks. That's why when he decided to take her out he didn't hesitate in using it against her.

Do you want proof? It worked, didn't it?

LOL. Seriously, I dislike it when that happens but after I vent, and I vent like a MADMAN, mind you, I try to recall Stan Lee's discussion about who would win in a superhero fight. "There's one answer to all of that; it's so simple. Anyone should know this! The person who'd win in a fight is the person that the scriptwriter wants to win!"

We all knew it was going to happen. It was predictable and disappointing. It was predictably disappointing, but we were able to brace ourselves for it so the blow was not as hard.

This makes me feel a little bit better until the cringe gets to me and I start rambling again. We can demand better stories and more consistent characterizations. This is a given; however, the writers are gods of their stories and who wins is decided by the narrative they wish to tell. Gotham Wars is a conflict between Bruce and Selina as well as the stress and psychological damage the mantle places on Bruce. Hurting his kids, going too far, becoming the thing he wished to defeat, that's what the story wants to show us.

Now for the theory crafting and storytelling practice, what if they didn't turn on Batman? What if we are looking at this like an epic War Story but it's actually just Family drama? It was clear that Dick and the rest wanted to talk to Bruce before escalating any further. They are not on Selina's side per se; rather, they just do not want a war.

Here is the Thesis for Batkids [aside from Jason]. They are uncertain about what to do, but they don't want Bruce to go too far. Jason on the other hand wants to escalate things and is fully on Selina's side. [It still upsets me that Cassandra and Duke's thoughts on this were never shown]

Jason being Jason confronts Bruce and tries to beat his message into his father's skull. Bruce reacts not only by fighting back but by insinuating Jason's death. This is when things got out of hand. This is the point when his kids decide to stop Bruce, but they are not questioning the mission by stopping him here. He uttered a threat to his kid's life. That's something Bruce/Batman wouldn't do and his family knows this. So when they realize that it needs to stop, they tell him to back off and stand down.

Now that I've reread it, this could explain the battle. Bruce is not holding back and is treating his kids as criminal threats; on the other hand, his kids still treat him with care and want him to stop hitting Jason and take a damn mental health break.

The way they all get bodied is silly and uncharacteristic [rage-inducing even] but that may be intentional as they are shown as the centrists in all of this. There is a twist in the middle there though and that may lead to other things. I can't believe I am writing this, but Gotham Wars might get better. It might explore the other Batkids and if this is copium talking, then I saw potential where there was none and fabricated a good story in my head at least.

[deliriousbug]

Do you remember that ‘Tfp — eyes go red/blue’?

I know that’s not exactly a thing for Mtmte, or at least the colour changes are far more consciously intentional, butttt what if, in rare circumstances, it is possible that one’s optic colour changes by their emotion? (Hence I don’t Know red being so popular for the cons cuz- hatred blah blah blah) sooo…….

Mtmte megatron seeing his s/os eyes go red?

OMG MAYBE ITS THE GLADIATOR S/O!!! Remember them lol? I’ve… made so many requests help lol! 😆 still love you’re writing!

Megatron woke with a jolt, his dormant battle protocols quickly booting up as his optics sweep his quarters. His lover was no longer curled against him in bed, but hunched in a far corner. Their servos clutched their favorite dagger tight to their chest, and they shifted slightly, lifting their helm and looking like a predator about to pounce. Their optics locked onto Megatron and all of the air in him escaped in a whoosh, hot on his lips. All this time, and he had never seen their optics turn such a fiery, troubling red. Not even in the old archival footage of his love in the gladiatorial Pits of Kaon. 

Megatron didn’t move a muscle, too horrifically concerned to do much else than whisper their name. They launched forward, and Megatron barely had time to throw his servos up and deflect the knife. Which had been aimed at his spark. As the two grappled, Megatron heard them hissing words at him. 

“You’ll never touch me again!” and “I’ll rip your spark out, you sick fragger!”

It broke Megatron’s spark. They had always been cagey about their past and what exactly they’d endured in the Pits, but Megatron was no fool. He used his weight for leverage and rolled their frames over, hauling them both up so he was sitting with his back against the wall and their back pressed against his chassis, his arms keeping them pinned to him. 

“Shh, my love,” he rumbled. 

He gently pried the knife from their shaking servo as they cursed him vehemently. It crossed his mind that, if not for being handicapped by the dream world, they could have easily offlined him. He wrapped his longer legs around theirs when they started to thrash. 

“It’s only a dream,” he said gently, lips right next to their audial. “You are safe, darling. I won’t let anyone else touch you for as long as I am functioning.”

Their frame was still riddled with tension but they’d stopped thrashing. He could still see the red glow cast from their optics reflecting off his arms crossing their chest. 

“That’s it,” he coaxed, “Focus on my voice. Feel my arms surrounding you, protecting you. No one can get to you here, my love.”

They sniffed and dropped their helm back onto Megatron’s shoulder, their optics shuttered. He loosened his hold on them and gently rubbed their arms, hoping to chase away the last of the memory fueled nightmare. 

“Good. Focus on that and breathe deep for me.”

They did as he said for a moment, and why their opened their optics they were —to Megatron’s great relief— once again crystalline blue.

“I feel you,” they whisper. “I feel you all around me, Megatron. Thank you.”

He smiles fondly and kisses their temple. “You do not need to thank me for loving you.”

[kaondecay]

a couple little vol 7 thoughts featuring vashwood brainrot 😎✌️

man this scene makes my brain itch on so many different levels lmao, like on the surface level wtf wolfwood!! we’ve just had all these chapters explicitly digging into how vash has a Problem where he tries to hide his pain under empty smiles- and in fact wolfwood clocked that about him pretty much instantly back when they first met! so of course badgering him about ~looking sad~ (especially when he started the page with a neutral to mildly glum expression) is just gonna make him try harder to cover it up, and that’s exactly what he does with that stupid little smile on the second page 😔

but wolfwood’s whole point here is that that shit isn’t gonna work on him no matter how hard vash tries! unfortunately wolfwood is also emotionally constipated as hell, so it comes out as aggression and teasing rather than anything genuine.

actually i just gotta revisit that earlier moment here because the contrast is just fascinating lmao

like goddamn wolfwood really came in hot with the sincerity in that first meeting, how did we go from that to this?? was it just because they were strangers then, and wolfwood thought he could get away with saying shit like that because their paths might never cross again? this was also before ww got his assignment from Knives- did he not know this was the boss’s brother? he probably didn’t realize the twins’ inhumanity at that point either… he’s had a lot to grapple with over the course of this assignment, both re: the twins’ apocalyptic power, and the fact that he has to betray vash at the end of it, that would naturally create a need for emotional distance. allowing honesty and attachment with vash puts too much at risk.

so really, given that very high-stakes need for distance, it’s telling that wolfwood still can’t help expressing his awareness of vash’s suffering & investment in cheering him up, even if it comes out in such a ridiculous way lol

it also seems like a clumsy/oblique way of trying to reassure vash that he’s still a person? vash’s inhuman nature has come more to the forefront lately- losing control in the dragon’s nest, regaining the memory of all the death he caused in july, catching that bullet with a feather only for the whole town to turn against him for it- and it’s clearly been weighing on him. so wolfwood acknowledges that angle by calling him all those awful things- “the legendary devil gunman, the humanoid typhoon”- but immediately discredits them by pointing out vash’s softheartedness.

idk i also have one more little bit of brainrot about the moment they share leaving the bar, acknowledging that things are about to get serious with Knives

like goddamn there’s so much meaning packed into that exchange!! it’s the closest they really come to acknowledging their whole “you know i know you know” deal around wolfwood’s assignment. (hah, “i told you from the start…”, fuck. ) like, openly telling vash that knives sent him would break the plausible deniability that wolfwood is simply fulfilling his mission, and that would put the orphanage in danger. at the same time, he has been 0% subtle and never actually *lied* to vash about it either- the few times vash has asked direct questions, wolfwood has given him vague answers or conspicuous silence and allowed him to draw his own conclusions.

so this seems like their weird twisty way of setting mutual expectations for what’s going to happen next. wolfwood is vash’s “guide”, no more and no less- he has enough insider information to bring vash safely to his brother’s door, but past that point wolfwood will stay out of the confrontation. it’s the one thing wolfwood and both brothers all agree is best, whether they like it or not. god wolfwood’s face in that last panel kills me

i am absolutely normal about this

[jasntodds]

Penance Chapter 2 Teaser - Full Chapter coming 6/12

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader Teaser Words: 1,716 Chapter Warnings: Swearing, a little bit of angst, some fluff, mentions of death, mentions of injuries, mentions of canon violence Summary: ❝Thesus: Stop. Give me your hand. I am your friend. Herakles: I fear to stain your clothes with blood. Thesus: Stain them. I don’t care.❞ It’s been a month and a half since Crane’s reign of terror was stopped, leaving Gotham to finally return to normal. But, what is normal? After everything Jason and you have been through, it seems normal might be some unobtainable dream state. But that’s not going to stop either of you from trying and maybe, you’ll get lucky in the end. At the end of it, the two of you have suffered enough, right? Right? A/N: I'm having problems with my taglist?? I'm trying desperately to get it to work properly so please bear with me lol I'm always going to post some sort of update when this fic will be posted just in case so you can search my blog under "penance" if you haven't been tagged in anything in a week!! A teaser or chapter will be posted every week!! You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary  and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

Jason heads out to find Tim, daunting his Red Hood gear and helmet. The drive isn’t too far from his safe house but it is raining tonight, on and off. Yesterday was nice, warm and no rain. It's a bit of a depressing contrast between the two days. The street lights reflect off the wet pavement and Jason isn't entirely sure what he's going to do when he gets there. All he knows is Tim will probably need help and he'll just take it from there. It's not exactly how he wants to approach any situation but he's not sure what Tim will even be doing.

Jason pulls up to a building across the street from an alley where some, surely, illegal deal of sorts is going down. Apparently, Tim is supposed to be here eventually so Jason parks the bike in the dark of his alley before he uses a grappling hook to get to the roof of the building just so he can see better. And then he waits.

Meanwhile, you've made your place on the roof overlooking the alley with the van, knowing this is where Tim will be. And you can’t help but feel excited to see him. You miss him a lot even if it is a little hard to be happy it's under the circumstances of Robin. There's also the bit of dread and excitement over seeing Jason, working with Jason.

Seeing him means there's going to have to be some sort of conversation over the two of you being unable to pick up a phone and call each other. There's going to be some sort of conversation about everything that happened. It's going to bring back all of the pain all over again. Will you even be able to pick up where you left off? Or will you fall into an awkward dance where you both just fumble over each other until Tim leaves? Or will it be worse? But, seeing him, being around him, always felt the most like home and you really hope he's okay and happy. You're excited just to see how he's doing.

You're laying on your stomach to take cover while you watch over the ledge but your fingers tap wildly against the pavement at the thought. It’s the hope this goes okay, that he doesn’t hate you. That Tim is happy to see you both. That Tim doesn’t get killed in the first five minutes of being Robin. Excitement, dread, and anxiety flood your system. Why did you agree to this?

Commotion starts from below you and you see Tim on the top of a car while the goons are loading their van. Even in the low light, you can tell the suit is a little different than Jason's and Dick's. The cape definitely is with its jagged edges and it's longer. It fits him actually. You stand on the edge of the roof, grappling hook in hand and knife in the other, ready to slide down the second things get out of hand. 

Tim handles himself okay at first but then they outnumber him and they’re faster than he is and better. You know Tim has had a few training sessions but by the looks of it, they could not have been very long or helpful. Things start looking pretty bad for him so you use the grappling hook to lower yourself down but before your feet even hit solid ground, shots ring through the alley, taking out one of the men and then the other. Just as your feet hit the ground, you nail the last one with a knife, turning to face down the alley with your arms crossed. And there he is, walking confidently with a gun in hand.

Of course, he beat you to it.

Jason's eyes widen behind his helmet. He did not expect to see you tonight. Kind of like last night, seeing you throws him off. It's a bit jarring somehow. Gotham might be a big city but you travel in the same circles, it was bound to happen. Just...two nights in a row seems...odd.

“I had that covered.” You state through your mask.

Jason can taste his heartbeat in his throat as he keeps closing the distance between you. Your mask always muffled your voice a little but it's still his favorite sound. He can feel his cheeks burning and a smile desperate to cross his lips. Jason bites it back, trying to keep his composure.

“Where the fuck did you even come from?” Jason quips back.

You point to the roof. “Clearly. And you?” You question, keeping your voice flat and curious, trying to conceal your own nerves.

Jason points a thumb over his shoulder. “Clearly.” He echoes as he stands next to you.

It all clicks then, this was definitely a setup by Dick. Of all fucking people, Dick Grayson is doing this shit? Jason swears up and down this is getting ridiculous. Bruce, Molly, Gar, Dick? They are all trying to get them to communicate and...maybe they have a point even if Jason never wants to admit it. Not when two of those people are Bruce and Dick. But, he can’t focus on that or how this is sending his head into a tailspin.

He needs to help Tim which means he can't let his feelings for you get in the way even if ignoring them is one of the hardest things he's ever done. He has to act normal and like being next to you doesn't make him want to explode. He needs to keep his cool, keep the smile from ripping apart his lips because even if this is a setup and he should be mad, he misses you so fucking much it physically pains him. He can't find himself to be mad because you'll never abandon Tim so even if you don't speak to Jason while you help him, at least he gets to see you as you. Like old times even if it doesn’t last and for that, Jason is happy.

Jason reaches behind his head, releasing the helmet before he takes it off and you swear you swallowed your heart. He looks so good. “Who the fuck are you supposed to be?” Jason calls, eyes locked on Tim and you think you've melted at the sound of his voice.

His voice is somehow better than you remember it. A little calloused, a little rough, but not too deep. It always fit him so well and you've never been so thankful to have a mask that covers the lower half of your mouth because your lips are curling into the most uncontrollable smile. Every piece of reservation you had about seeing him completely flies out of the window.

Jason Todd has always had his type of gravitation pull like a planet lost in the universe and you've just been sucked right back into it.

You miss him so fucking much.

Tim looks down to his chest, right at the R symbol before he looks back to Jason. “I’m Robin.” Tim states as if Jason should have known.

The subtle hint of a smile comes over Jason’s lips seeing someone else in the Robin suit. It’s weird because it almost feels…hurtful. It hurts a little seeing someone else in a position where he was, not in a jealous way but in a way that he is reminded that was him. He was Robin and he fucked up and now he’s not. It hurts in the way he’s reminded of it being ripped away from his bloody hands. The suit is different, Jason clocks almost every difference in the first few seconds but it is similar. Jason was beaten to death in something similar with the same mantle. There’s almost this part of him that even worries about it. Robin didn’t work for Dick. He didn’t die as Robin but it didn’t work for him. Jason was killed. Where’s that going to leave Tim?

On the other hand though, there is something about someone else taking up Robin that feels good. Jason died but Robin didn’t. Robin never had to die with Jason and he shouldn’t. The people need a Robin and he doesn’t really know Tim but you do and Gar does. He trusts you both and Tim looks thrilled to be here. It’s a mix but there is something kind of nice seeing the resurrection of Robin.

“Hey.” You chime as you walk closer to him.

Tim’s smile splits his face. “Hey, how’d you know I’d be here?”

“Molly tracked you the second a Robin showed up. Knew it was you.” You laugh softly before you pull him into a gentle hug. “You should have told me.” You say as you pull away, your hands coming to his shoulders as you look over the suit, noticing all the difference between this one and Jason’s.

“Yeah, I thought I could handle this.” Tim chuckles sheepishly, realizing he was a little in over his head tonight but not lacking in any of his confidence to do this job. 

“Clearly, you were wrong.” Jason closes the distance between you. “You’re lucky we showed up when we did.” Jason stands right beside you as you drop your hands from his shoulders, maybe you looking over the suit makes him want to chew his tongue out of his mouth.

“Yeah, I got that.” Tim nods his head. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” The smile reaches your eyes as you beam back at Tim.

Jason’s eyes narrow at you slightly. You seem awfully happy. He knows Tim is your friend but you just seem overly happy or maybe he’s in his own head about it. He just remembers that day picking you up from Titans Tower and it was...similar. It's like he's getting stabbed in the chest and the base of his throat knowing you were not happy to see him tonight. The very thought of your feelings disappearing makes him feel like his rib cage might collapse on itself. So, he pushes it away as far as he possibly can and bites back his own words, trying to just be relieved you look happy instead of pissed off Dick set you up. He’s just thankful you haven’t run away. Yet.

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[antrea]

hello

if you wanted to know my thoughts about morgan frost and his decision to follow donald fucking trump on ig here they are. if not that's fine this is kinda my own ranting exercise lol

also i don't think this ramble will follow a structure so sorry about that.

ok so as many ppl will know i was in japan during election day (did mail in early voting due to this) so i didn't really react to much on the tumble but invasive thoughts would follow me if i was just sitting there trying to relax in an onsen or like waiting for a train or something. and it would just like frustrate me to no end. like i know in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter AT ALL and there are much more serious things to be worried about instead of some random athlete's political stance. but it's just horrible as a fan to find out that i dedicated all this time (and honestly money - looking at you, adidas stadium series jersey with full stitched lettering) to supporting a player and now the question is like ok so which are you: are you homophobic/transphobic, sexist/women-hater, racist/xenophobic, a climate change denier, etc. etc., all of the above, or what? but you know it's like my own fault for trying to think i know these people (didn't you learn this lesson from kpop? i guess the fuck not) like just bc he seems to treat his sis and mom right and seems to be a nice boy to all the media doesn't mean that we know him!!! d'oh!

then there's the whole like canadian aspect of it all, like well thank goodness he's not actually american and could vote for this guy! but then sometimes it feels even worse that he's canadian and STILL likes some part of trump enough to follow him on ig the day after the election (and yeah i used some third party app to confirm this, because if he followed trump back in 2016 or before for the memes and shits and giggles and didn't unfollow later, honestly i would prefer that so much over following him in nov 2024.), when literally ryan poehling who owns like trump books doesn't even follow the guy on ig then wow you must fucking LOVE trump then. it makes me SO mad. like if the actual conservative americans on the team -- which i'm sure there's a bunch -- don't follow him on ig and you're making a point to as a fucking canadian then like -- !!!!!! like just keep your politics private at that point because i do not want to fucking know!!! why exactly do you love him so much?!?!?! fuck!!!!

i also feel so bad when i think of ppl who have been following him and the flyers for so much longer than i have bc i literally didn't know who morgan frost was this time last year so it hasn't even been long since he's been my favorite athlete and i already feel like this :(

the final thing i've been grappling with is like how do i go on from here. as i bet everyone could tell just by looking at my blog this year i've basically giffed the shit out of him and taken loads of pics as well at voorhees or at games. in the list of upsetting and annoying things, i KNOW that if this was like any other team's player and they did something like this i would be like "ew gross, that player is gross and so is anyone who is still a fan of them". but then it's happened to MY fave guy and i'm just like :| like in general i think it would be great if i just stopped stanning real life people entirely but it's so hard. i think one thing that has helped is that frost has kinda sucked overall this season so i haven't even needed to see him much lmao. i think the best i can do is just dial back my posts and thoughts about him and just treat him as an Average Player. again, it sucks, because i'm out here going like "well i can sort of still like him because he hasn't done anything like actually posted 'yay trump!' or like explicitly endorsed him" but isn't the follow itself pretty telling of him???? again it's like how freaking of a hypocrite am i for not holding the same standard for these privileged white men just because this one was my fave and the others don't play for my team.

i guess one thing i'm completely ok with is let's keep the rpf rolling lmao. esp if he's a homophobe or something let's keep him kissing boys.