#and he was driving a truck

[voshaduan]

DCXDP or regular DC writing prompt!

Cross country road trip with (a very reluctant) John Constantine.

Constantine didn’t want to pick up a hitchhiker, but they were very persistent, and he could tell something was up with either them or the situation, his ‘occult senses’ were tingling.

Bonus points if it’s Danny or Dani/Ellie that hitches a ride!

[kizzer55555]

The power of hotdogs

Danny is running to Gotham to escape the GIW. As he’s running into an alleyway, he crashes into non other than condiment king who proceeds to attack and hits the GIW goons behind him. This absolutely terrifies them due to the fact that their prestigious white clothes will be stained. The fact that he has people running in terror gives Condiment king a giddy feeling so he proceeds to chase them around Gotham.

Thus starts Danny’s constant exploits of running to condiment king when he’s being chased and the rogue scarring the living daylights out of the GIW. They develop nightmares and Condiment king starts developing new concoctions that will specifically stain clothes and never come out. Mwa ha ha!

Eventually, Danny gets adopted by the rogue and becomes his sidekick. Now, when people learned that condiment king got a new sidekick, they laughed. Who in their right mind would want to mentor under him. They believed that this was some poor sob who was down on their luck and truly desperate. That or some weirdo like the ‘king’ himself.

But they didn’t understand.

They didn’t understand that they should never have let Danny Fenton (known as Phantom) become Condiment King’s sidekick.

Danny knows how to animate hotdogs and other foods to create an army. Danny knows intimately about the secret nasty burger sauce that is capable of powerful explosions of you heat it up. Danny has knowledge in the usage and how to build various weaponry designed to shoot or even be powered by green sludge (which can easily be replaced by ketchup, mustard, or relish).

And he hasn’t even shown Gotham his power-set yet. No one knows why he calls himself phantom. For all they know, he’s just a normal (terrifying) human.

Everyone blames the GIW for this mess.

[cod-dump]

Price: Why are you holed up in your quarters?

Graves, sitting on the floor, staring blankly: No Reason.

Price:

Price: Nik picked you up without any effort at all, and now you don't know how to process how turned on it got you, is that it?

Graves: what the FUCK

Price: What?

Graves: HOW DID YOU GUESS THAT IN TWO SECONDS???

Price: Oh, I saw it happen. It was funny. And it happened to me about 10 years ago.

[kingofanemptyworld]

midoriya almost got isekai’d out of his own story holy shit

[callixspod]

Persona 4 Golden Update but... Something's off. (Read ID: Important)

Expect to see more soon!

[charmvinyl]

guuuuysss... hear me out... sleazy drug dealer! Art with shy inexperienced reader... the cute, perfect girl who's never touched drugs or alcohol but wants to try it out cause all her friends do it! and of course art's perfect. he's constantly hanging out around the area, overcharging shitty high school kids just cause he can. he'd definitely charge you 80 for a gram the first time u meet just to see if you'd actually take the bait. surprised enough when u do and God. it's so fun toying with you </33

[ritoryb]

farthest strand

[munsonsfairy]

lost files 📸✨🍳🧰

[pattydia]

he’s so redneck here i’m drooling

[ceilidho]

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CzJkhXRLjEU/?igshid=ODhhZWM5NmIwOQ==

Price ✨

OKAY WAIT THOUGH please someone write this I’ll scream

Poor single mom who just upended her entire life and moved to a new town, and obviously during their first week there, she gets into a car accident that completely totals her car :(( and she can only afford a ten year old manual car with like 90k miles on it :(( even though she doesn’t know how to drive stick

Cue the grumpy local sheriff, who was the first on the scene when she had her accident, teaching her how to drive stick by making her sit in his lap. Then invites himself over for dinner after their “lessons” and holds her baby in his lap the whole time and does little airplane noises to feed the baby supper

[devildomwriter]

The idea of Solomon driving around an old pick up truck cracks me up and I don’t know why

[tj-crochets]

Hey y'all! Work's been more stressful than usual (I'm covering for a coworker's vacation) and I'd love to hear some funny work stories if y'all have any you'd like to share. I'll start it off with some of the weirdest contractor interactions I've ever had: - the contractor who never went anywhere without his cat carrier full of live ferrets - the contractor who, every single time he called me, said "aren't you proud of me? You're proud of me, right? I'm your best contractor?" (he was not) - another time I was covering for a coworker and so handling paperwork for contractors I usually don't work with, and one of them spent a long time on the phone trying to persuade me to move into his cabin in the woods. His methods of persuasion were twofold: he explained how cool his truck is in intense detail (I do not care about trucks) and he bragged about how many laws he was breaking while contracting with the company I work for. I, of course, told my boss, because a lot of the laws he was breaking were basic safety things???? But him trying to brag about breaking laws to the person who handles the paperwork he just admitted to falsifying was hilarious to me

[compacflt]

in regard to the icemav convo about american made cars: I think it would be funny if after mav gets his regular license, ice buys him a truck that they can use for transporting stuff to the hangar and when he gifts it to mav all the man can do is laugh bc stamped across the ass is MAVERICK. It’s a 2023 ford maverick (in area 51 bc I’m partial to that color)

and mav likes it, but he doesn’t love driving it bc it’s so big (and he just likes being a passenger princess too much), so ice drives it mostly which inspires a whole lot of jokes about ice liking having maverick’s name stamped on his ass. bradley gags from the other room every time.

if it matters to u, i agree with this hc 150% on rhetoric grounds. thank god for your mind.

however i would like to raise the issue that recent american pickup trucks have become non-useful, overexpensive, and suburban-coded in a way i think ice and mav would reject. the ford maverick was built with the intention of dropping kindergarteners off at school, not of actually doing hard labor. see below infographic for what I mean.

It’s a fucking travesty. Trucks are so ugly and useless now. the maverick is not immune to this. (maverick below)

what good is having a fucking truck if it can’t even hold two REGULAR ASS BIKES in the bed. & when the bed is empty the chassis is unbalanced in a way that leads to more accidents etc. (tbf that was true in the 70s/80s too but im feeling more hateful towards modern trucks rn). In short—the modern American pickup truck is no longer useful, it’s a way to virtue signal to other Americans that you *think * you know what hard labor is, even when you’re driving around in a glorified odyssey with a teeny tiny bed that can barely hold a couple bags of mulch for the back garden

ice & mav don’t even have any little kids anymore, i think they’d consider a backseat useless & a waste of space

SO i would like to offer you a Compromise, which is that ice & mav buy either (or both) a 1974 ford maverick AND/OR a 1990 ford maverick

for the Funny Name & coolness factor (& the “making Bradley vom cause of how cute his parents are” factor), and then soup up, like, a 1984 Chevy C10 for actual towing/hauling purposes.

[starsapphire]

A swift shadow swoops from the rafters--and, in the light, becomes the dread Batman!

[cor-lapis]

the il siracusano experience (in a rough order of having a good time -> penance)

[gracebethartacc]

soooo I had a lore idea earlier that ties into the rewrite really well,,,,,,

Poor unfortunate souls am I right :)