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aesthetic-uwus · 5 years ago

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Movies/tvshow recommendations

1. Scott pilgrim (2010)

As bass guitarist for a garage‑rock band, Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) has never had trouble getting a girlfriend; usually, the problem is getting rid of them. As Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) skates into his heart

2. Growing op (2008)

A teenager tries to live a normal life while his parents run an operation growing weed out of their home

3. 10 things I hate about you (1999)

Kat Stratford (Julia Stiles) is beautiful, smart and quite abrasive to most of her fellow teens, meaning that she doesn't attract many boys. Unfortunately for her younger sister, Bianca (Larisa Oleynik), house rules say that she can't date until Kat has a boyfriend

4. Juno (2007)

When precocious teen Juno MacGuff (Ellen Page) becomes pregnant, she chooses a failed rock star and his wife (Jennifer Garner) to adopt her unborn child. Complications occur

5. Easy A (2010)

Prompted by her popular best friend to spill details of her boring weekend, Olive (Emma Stone), a clean‑cut teen, decides to spice things up by telling a little lie about losing her virginity. When the high‑school busybody (Amanda Bynes) overhears the conversation...

6. Warehouse 13 (2009-2014)

Plot. The series follows U.S. Secret Service Agents Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly) and Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock) when they are assigned to the secretive Warehouse 13 for supernatural artifacts. It is located in a barren landscape in South Dakota, and they initially regard the assignment as punishment.

7. ferris buellers day off (1986)

Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) has an uncanny skill at cutting classes and getting away with it. Intending to make one last duck‑out before graduation, Ferris calls in sick, "borrows" a Ferrari, and embarks on a one‑day journey through the streets of Chicago.

8. Perks of being a wallflower (2012)

Socially awkward teen Charlie (Logan Lerman) is a wallflower, always watching life from the sidelines, until two charismatic students become his mentors. Free‑spirited Sam (Emma Watson) and her stepbrother Patrick (Ezra Miller) while overcoming the problem from his past

9. Sex education (2019-?)

Socially awkward high school student Otis may not have much experience in the lovemaking department, but he gets good guidance on the topic in his personal sex ed course -- living with mom Jean, who is a sex therapist. Being surrounded by manuals, videos and tediously open conversations about sex

10. Anne with an E (2017-?)

In the late 19th century, brother and sister Matthew and Marilla Cuthbert, both past their prime, decide to take on an orphan boy to help out around their ancestral farm of Green Gables, on the outskirts of the town of Avonlea, on Prince Edward Island.

11. Santa Clarita diet (2017-2019)

Joel and Sheila Hammond are everyday suburban real estate agents in Santa Clarita, California. The couple face a series of obstacles when Sheila undergoes a metamorphosis, becomes undead and starts craving human flesh.

12. Atypical (2017-?)

This heartfelt comedy follows Sam, a teenager on the autism spectrum, who has decided he is ready for romance. In order to start dating -- and hopefully find love -- Sam will need to be more independent, which also sends his mother (Jennifer Jason Leigh) on her own life-changing path.

13. That 70s show (1998-2006)

A comedy revolving around a group of teenage friends, their mishaps, and their coming of age, set in 1970s Wisconsin. Eric Forman is a typical high school student growing up in Wisconsin in 1976 with his family and his friends. ... The head of the group is Eric Forman who lives under the authority of parents Red and Kitty.

14. Tuca and Bertie (2019)

Premise. Tuca & Bertie follows "the friendship between two 30-year-old bird-women who live in the same apartment building, Tuca, a cocky, care-free toucan, and Bertie, an anxious, daydreaming songbird."

15. The end of the fucking world (2017-2019?)

James (Alex Lawther), a 17-year-old who believes himself to be a psychopath, and Alyssa (Jessica Barden), a rebellious classmate who sees in James a chance to escape from her tumultuous home life. ...

16 Derry girls (2018-?)

Derry Girls is a Northern Irish sitcom created by Lisa McGee. Set in 1990s Derry, Northern Ireland the show follows five teens as they live through political conflict while going through the challenges of being teenagers.

17. Grease (1978)

Plot. In the summer of 1958, local boy Danny Zuko and vacationing Sandy Olsson meet at the beach and fall in love. When the summer comes to an end, Sandy—who is going back to Australia—frets that they may never meet again, but Danny tells her that their love is "only the beginning"

18. Love simon (2018)

Everyone deserves a great love story, but for 17‑year‑old Simon Spier, it's a little more complicated. He hasn't told his family or friends that he's gay, and he doesn't know the identity of the anonymous classmate that he's fallen for online. Resolving both issues proves hilarious, terrifying

19. Legally blond (2001)

Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) has it all. She wants nothing more than to be Mrs. Warner Huntington III. But there is one thing stopping him (Matthew Davis) from proposing: She is too blond. Elle rallies all of her resources and gets into Harvard, determined to win

20. Legally blonde 2 (2003)

Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) journeys to Washington, D.C., to have her say about animal rights, but is ignored by every politician she encounters and quickly learns that the White House can be even tougher to navigate than the Ivy League

21. shameless us (2011-?)

Shameless is the story of a family of six kids and their drunk and selfish father. The eldest daughter Fiona has to raise the rest of the family on her own. They need to steal food and steal money to live while their father takes everything and offers nothing. Meet the fabulously dysfunctional Gallagher family.

22. Dead like me (2003)

Georgia Lass is aloof and emotionally distant from her family and shies away from her life. After dropping out of college, she takes a temp job through Happy Time Temporary Services. During her lunch break on her first day, she is hit and killed by a toilet seat falling from the deorbiting Mir space station.

23. Daria (1997-2002)

A smart and cynical girl goes through teenage life as a proud outsider in a world of mainly idiotic adolescents and condescending adults. Daria Morgendorffer is an intelligent, unpopular, and quite sarcastic teenager tolerating life among the idiots at Lawndale High.

24. IT (2017)

Seven young outcasts in Derry, Maine, are about to face their worst nightmare ‑‑ an ancient, shape‑shifting evil that emerges from the sewer every 27 years to prey on the town's children. Banding together over the course of one horrifying summer

25. IT chapter 2 (2019)

Defeated by members of the Losers' Club, the evil clown Pennywise returns 27 years later to terrorize the town of Derry, Maine, once again. Now adults, the childhood friends have long since gone their separate ways. But then people start disappearing....

26. Stranger things (2016-?)

A young boy, Will Byers, goes missing near a top-secret government laboratory. On the same night, a strange young girl appears at a diner in the town. ... A love letter to the '80s classics that captivated a generation, 'Stranger things' is set in 1983 Indiana, where a young boy vanishes into thin air.

27. Ginger snaps (2000)

The story of two outcast sisters, Ginger (Katharine Isabelle) and Brigitte (Emily Perkins), in the mindless suburban town of Bailey Downs. On the night of Ginger's first period, she is savagely attacked by a wild creature. Ginger's wounds miraculously heal

28. Arrietty (2010)

Arrietty, a tiny teenager, lives with her parents in the recesses of a suburban home, unbeknown to the homeowner and housekeeper. Like others of her kind, Arrietty remains hidden from her human hosts, but occasionally ventures forth

29. F is for family (2015-?)

Set in the 1970s, this animated raunchy comedy is inspired by the life of stand-up comic Bill Burr, who is a co-creator and executive producer of the series. Burr also voices the character of Frank Murphy, a short-tempered veteran who lives in the suburbs with his wife, Sue (Laura Dern) and their three children

#movies #television #recommend #ferris bueller's day off #derry girls #10 things i hate about you #daria #scott pilgrim #easy a #legally blonde #ginger snaps

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sasamdcu · 5 years ago

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So I watched the newest episode of YJ because I was recommended by Rich from Whelmed as it showed how they were taking Harper’s Character, and I trust him on this. And as hesitant and turned off from previous episodes as I’ve been I still wanted to know what the heckie they were doing. And I’m glad I did. As a wise man Rich quoted once said “Being a YJ fan is [emotionally] complicated”.

Sorry for the rant previously about their characterization before this episode Rich. Sorry for a second.

So after this weeks episode of Young Justice I feel a bit better about Harper’s characterization and the character assassination from the beach scene. I see what they were trying to do. I still don’t like it overall though. This episode felt largely tokenistic.

I think it’s important to talk about Domestic Abuse. Especially with vulnerable teens. The problem is there are other characters this could have been addressed with. To a degree it has been with Artemis though obviously it couldn’t have been as overtly due to Cartoon Network at the time. It could have been Tara with Slade if they wanted to avoid him being a pedophile like he is in Judas Contract and just be more of an abusive father figure(because even off Cartoon Network talking about pedophilia might be pushing it). Though from hints at the end of this episode it looks like something else might be going on with Tara instead(if they give her a redemption arc I am 100% for her not being used for this situation). But they also have Cass and Steph. Both who have shitty villain parents as well. Cass’ in particular being particularly abusive. Though I guess Harper’s is the least “super villain” and most just deadbeat criminal father.

My problem is Fundamentally this changes Harper’s story greatly from the comics. It takes her from someone who was strong and independent and dependable and who’s story was one of hope and moving forward and helping others and becomes one of suffering and needing being saved and It’s not that stories about domestic abuse aren’t important. It’s that we rarely see the other side and the rebuilding and positivity that comes after escaping a situation. That’s what Harper in the comics gave us. And I think it’s more powerful than a rehashed “my father hits us” story that is used often especially in stories of queer youth. Especially since most of the people watching Young Justice now are the young adults who have grown up on Young Justice and have possibly recently escaped similar circumstances and need those stories of the future. Of things working out.

The people who need the stories of speaking out are generally going to be younger and as a result inherently less likely to even see this episode due to the very privatized services for watching Young Justice. You cannot watch it outside of the US legally.(trust me I’m in Canada.) You need to pay for a DC Universe subscription.(And outside of the US for a US based VPN) For a kid struggling with abusive parents this isn’t going to be something they’ll widely run into. It’s something they need to search for. Mostly likely on pirate sites which again trust me DC have been decent at keeping down on release days. And that doesn’t help nearly as much. If this had come out when it was still on Cartoon Network or even still on Netflix I would full heartedly support this take on Harper’s story. But as it stands it feels unnecessary for it to have been HARPER to be the one who had to tell it. There are other characters. Harper could have been that positive light. And maybe she will in the future. But it still feels somehow diminished.

And at it’s core this is totally just an issue of target audience, as a young adult Harper in the comics gave me this story of a girl in her late teens who’s found a place in life and is finding ways to help others. Young Justice gives me a young teen who’s struggling to stay alive through an abusive household. I clearly relate more to the comics with where I am currently in my life. The story told here will always be important and while I don’t think it’s best for Harper’s story I also wouldn’t want it removed at all. It is very important for these types of stories to be told. I again just would have really like a more positive story in Harper personally. Nothing I can say to criticize it really matters however because the message is more important than the character interpretation I think on this matter. I don’t have to like their take on Harper. But I don’t want them to lessen this message. It’s hard to explain. Being let down about something because they’re doing something else with it that’s important on a fundamental social level and could help others is weird because you don’t want to criticize the message and want to support it and it makes it feel a bit like you can’t say “hey this could have been done better.” But that’s more or less where I’m at. It could have been done better. But I’d rather have it than not.

It also doesn’t excuse the biphobic way of introducing her bisexuality by saying she cheats during a scene she’s getting drunk and shooting guns. That scene wasn’t necessary. You could have had her pulled into Therapy based on the bruises no booze or guns involved. You could have had her mention he beats them for being Queer. You didn’t need to link her bisexuality with cheating. And maybe that’s why it bothers me so much about this change. It still links her queerness with suffering and being a victim and being self destructive. (Which is what I mean above by. It could have been done better.) Queer people need not just characters who suffer but characters who are strong and independent and happy as well. And that was taken away for scenes that feel largely unnecessary outside of the counseling session.

Instead we’re given Kaldur being queer. Which I’m so glad they did. With Jackson in the comics I so badly wanted Kaldur to be confirmed part of the queer community and we got that. Unfortunately it feels week and tokenistic. We get a shot of him kissing another man. A side character who appeared to my knowledge once in the comics and has no speaking lines. Maybe that will change? But honestly we have had so many main characters couple up in hetero relationships that this just doesn’t feel like enough. It feels like a cheap way to please people without having to actually write the relationship further into the show. It also doesn’t help alleviate the worry that the writers just don’t understand how to write queer relationships, a feeling felt strongly after that beach scene by many and which I know has actively alienated many fans, myself included.

Greg himself admits he’s still learning about the Queer community and I can respect that. He’s open about trying his best and still learning. My only hope is that the staff have hired some queer people to help build these portrayals in this case. It doesn’t feel like they have and knowing how well Voltron went in the end after refusing to hire experts well. If they haven’t then again I’m going to keep worrying that there isn’t something more going on and the community is going to be failed again. Because if you don’t know much about the community. The best way to make sure they’re being treated right in your representation is honestly just hire an expert to double check for you. It’s literally if you don’t know just ask someone who does. It’s not hard. I tweeted asking if there was anyone like that on staff but haven’t received a response. I can hope.

Anyways I’m like the only person who’s ever written Tara/Harper content specifically Tara/Harper/Raven so if I get that end game somehow with the absurd half these characters never met representation then fuck it I rescind everything and will boy at Greg’s feet praising him for giving me literally everything I as a queer poly trans woman could ever want in a DC work. (throw Cass in too for good measure)

Anyways this is a mess because I slept through high school and never learned how to write a proper essay. If you’ve suffered through this long through the rambling and repeating and whining then you deserve something to brighten your day a bit. Have a very niche meme.

#young justice spoilers #young justice season 3

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thesundowncrew · 8 years ago

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Slice of Life bio ; Sam

Depending on the thread, Sam’s occupation during his adulthood may change but everything else up to that point is pretty solid. It’s also important to note that though his granda was a retired cop, he had no idea about Sam’s abuse when he went back home to his dad. Sam kept it incredibly well-hidden because he didn’t want to worry his granda nor cause him trouble.

Age 6 *Mother passes away. *Father shows signs of irritability and depression. Grows emotionally distant and works longer hours to keep himself distracted. *Stays with granda a lot. Passes the time reading books in Sundown. *Meets Liore (6 years) and Natalie (5 years).

Age 7-10 *Father starts spending more time at the bar than at home. *When they do meet at home, father shows signs of verbal aggression. The two keep their distance. *Sam seeks solace elsewhere. Becomes active in school curricular. Likes to help out the school librarians. No one would ever expect the good-natured, studious boy to have problems at home. *Often sleeps over at Natalie’s house or with granda at Sundown. *Becomes incredibly independent. *Meets 19-year-old Axel. Age 11-14 *Starts showing a more rebellious, self-destructive side. Grows fed up with father’s drunkedness, especially when school fees are at stake. *Father loses job thanks to his drinking. Had their first fist-fight, resulting in Sam’s major scar beneath his left ribs (cut from glass bottle). *Father gets a night-shift job working as a security guard so is out all night and sleeps all day. *He and Sam rarely speak. When they do, results in more arguing and beatings. *Rebels more. Starts to slack off in school, sometimes plays hooky to go skateboarding or hanging out at junkyards. Picks fights with bullies. *Finally gets caught for trespassing and vandalism. Gets out easy thanks to granda’s influence but gets his ears told off by the old man. Never gets caught again. *Starts doing odd jobs and writing papers for other students to earn pocket money. *Gets caught and is suspended from school. Suspension was cut short only if Sam agreed to see the school counselor, Mr. Williams.

Age 15 *He and Liore are officially called an item. *Self-destructive behaviors lessen. Goes back to school but has garnered a mixed sort of reputation. Still fights with bullies, this time with more wit than brawn. *Mr. Williams continues to help Sam with his anger issues. Suspects domestic abuse but could not say anything as Sam was adamant in keeping it secret. *Started seeing Mr. Williams as a surrogate father figure. *Pushed Mr. Williams away when he was close to reporting his father. At this point only Natalie and Liore knew about the abuse. *Sam decides on plans after graduation. Wanted to move in with his granda but dad would have none of it. Huge fight breaks out and Sam ends up unconscious. *Natalie finds him at home and Sam is brought to the hospital while dad is picked up by authorities. *Sam’s dad was sentenced to jail for child negligence and abuse. *Sam moves in with his granda at Sundown.

Age 16-17 *Sam gets back on track in school, with the help of his friends and Mr. Williams. Gets grades good enough to land a scholarship. *Takes up casual self-defense lessons from Axel, and uses it as an outlet. *He and Liore are madly in love and make plans for college, for the future. *Granda falls ill often and his leg gradually gets worse. *Sam, Natalie and Axel are the best of friends and help out at Sundown as part-timers.

Age 17-18 *Liore gets critically injured during a hit-and-run after a Halloween party. Passes away in the ambulance, on the way to the hospital. *Granda passes away soon after Sam’s birthday in November. *Sam, now legally an adult, becomes the owner of the Sundown bookstore. *Shares some of the inheritance with Axel, as granda also left him behind some cash. *Despite the emotional turmoil, Sam struggles with his studies in order to keep his scholarship. *Sam finally has a mental breakdown. Takes a break from school but is held back a year and loses his scholarship. *Attends counseling with Mr. Williams to deal with his suicidal, self-destructive tendencies. *Mr and Mrs Shadestone (Natalie’s adoptive parents) act as Sam’s godparents and financially support him and his studies. *Sam graduates a year after Natalie (who is a year younger but they were in the same grade).

Age 19-20 and beyond *Sam takes a break before deciding which college to go to, and which course to further his studies in. Meanwhile he runs the quaint, little antique bookstore in memory of his granda. *Axel is the bookstore’s permanent errand boy, regardless of what other occupation he has. Natalie pops in once in a while. *Around the time he’s 20, his dad would have been released from jail due to rehab and good behavior. *No matter what, Sam no longer wants to speak or have anything to do with his dad. Files a restraining order against him and is finally left alone. *Even after his dad remarries and raises a new family, Sam does not consider himself a part of his dad’s life. *Despite everything that has happened, Sam heals. He learns to laugh and love again.

PLACE IN SOCIETY

✖ FINANCIAL – wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty

✖ MEDICAL – fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / deceased

✖ CLASS OR CASTE – upper / middle / working / slave / unsure

✖ EDUCATION – qualified / unqualified / perpetually studying

FAMILY

✖ MARITAL STATUS – married, happily / married, unhappily / engaged and devoted to a fault / partnered / single / divorced / widow or widower / separated / it’s complicated

✖ CHILDREN – has a child / no children / wants children / adopted a child

✖ FAMILY – close with (step) sibling(s) / not close with (step) sibling(s) / has no sibling(s) / sibling is deceased / estranged

✖ AFFILIATION – orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by both parents / other

TRAITS & TENDENCIES

✖ disorganised / organized / in between

✖ close-minded / open-minded / in between

✖ cautious / reckless / in between

✖ patient / impatient / in between

✖ outspoken / reserved / in between

✖ leader / follower / in between

✖ sympathetic / unemphatic / in between

✖ optimistic / pessimistic / in between

✖ hardworking / lazy / in between

✖ cultured / uncultured / in between

✖ loyal / disloyal / in between

✖ faithful / unfaithful / unknown

SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

✖ SEXUALITY – heterosexual / heteroflexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / demi sexual

✖ SEX – sex repulsed / neutral / sex favorable

✖ ROMANCE – romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable

✖ SEXUALLY – sexually adventurous / sex experienced / naive / inexperienced /curious / uninterested

ABILITIES

✖ COMBAT SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✖ LITERACY SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✖ ARTISTIC SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✖ TECHNICAL SKILLS – excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

#;headcanon (Samhain)#;slice of life (human!Samhain)#;slice of life #huge ass character sheet dump #more for my reference #been wanting to do this timeline for a while now cus i keep getting things jumbled up

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alzhelpnow · 4 years ago

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Difference Between Dementia And Alzheimer's

Alzheimer Disease Or Dementia

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Dementia can be devastating to you and your family as you lose your cognitive function and memory. Symptoms usually develop slowly and get worse over time, becoming severe enough to interfere with daily tasks. Damage can occur many years before the first symptoms appear, and once the disease is set in motion, it is impossible to treat, although some of the symptoms can usually be allayed, at least for a time. Vascular dementia impacts different parts of the brain, and symptoms depend on where it occurs. Since most dementia occurs in old age, the early symptoms, which are very mild, are often dismissed as just signs of aging. Signs and symptoms can vary depending on the type of dementia a person has, as well as the area of the brain the dementia is affecting.

Dementia And More Research

Medicare covers a variety of hospital and outpatient services to help you manage and treat your condition at each stage. As the condition progresses, the individual can experience problems with walking, speaking and even swallowing, and will almost certainly require intensive one-to-one care. As dementia progresses, the symptoms get worse, though the severity will differ for each individual. People who suffer from dementia have unique and specific needs and their care and support services need to be individually tailored. BrightStar Care® is your solution for professional care for early, middle, and late-stage dementia care. Sleep disturbances are common for people with dementia, and often lead to carers also having problems sleeping.

Dementia Home Care And Adult Day Care

Late-stage dementia is about the time when people are unable to care for themselves and need assistance. Behavior begins to alter, problems with sleeping occur, getting lost or wandering, and increased aggression are just a few of the dementia symptoms one may face. Although the two concepts may, at times, be interchangeable, there are some key differences that clearly distinguish one from the other. The person with dementia may lose interest in once-pleasurable activities and become more passive, depressed, or anxious. Vascular dementia makes up about 10% of dementia cases, and frequently occurs after a stroke. Patients with moderate and advanced dementia cannot adequately care for themselves and usually require around-the-clock care.

Regular Home Care And Dementia Home Care

Understanding available options can help individuals living with the disease and their caregivers to cope with symptoms and improve quality of life. As the disease progresses, your parent will need more help managing legal and financial affairs. You'll have peace of mind, knowing your loved one is enjoying the highest quality of life possible. You're entitled to live a fulfilling life, and part of that is learning to cope with anxiety. Given the emotional and psychological changes in store for both you and your parent, you may find it helpful to confide in someone with a religious or spiritual background. As your loved ones get older, you might be starting to look into some kind of senior care for them to help them along if you are no longer able to.

Memory Care Or A Nursing Home

Carrells Country Living town House helps seniors remain functionally independent by offering many independence-centered dementia programs. You know something is wrong, and you need to talk to the other person, but you do not want to deal with the issue. Ez View Group Home helps older adults remain functionally independent by offering many independence-centered dementia programs and activities. You may find yourself becoming irritated, depressed, anxious, or suspicious, especially when you are having memory problems. The phenomenon of waking up at 3 in the morning, or thereabouts, is actually more common than you may think. In its most severe stage, dementia could cause a person to depend completely on others for basic activities and daily living.

Dementia Patients And Guardians Care And Administrations Conveyance

You should check with your state to see what the requirements are in your state. In order to maintain a healthy and fulfilled lifestyle, you have to look after your body. The stress on your father, yourself and your husband is not to be taken lightly. Coloring has long been considered to be a therapeutic activity, again for kids of all ages, young and old. You're looking at your thoughts from a birds-eye view, and you are not judging yourself for what you are feeling or thinking. You have a reason for your feelings, and you are able to point to yourself as the cause.

Cognitive Impairment And Dementia Risk

A number of basic socioeconomic variables are known to influence measures of cognitive and functional ability and to be associated with the risk of AD. After the assessment, the consultant will draw together all the results and determine what is happening. Physical and neurologic examinations were performed at baseline and at months 6, 12, and 18. Even if you and your loved ones enjoy a healthy lifestyle, you could still be at risk for dementia. Although getting older is the biggest risk factor for dementia, evidence shows there are things you can do to help reduce your own risk. The limited genetic variation is still present because only a few individuals were left to breed.

Ethnic Differences In Diet And Vitamin Intake

Level of comfort and confidence during the testing session may also vary among ethnic groups. Norms for the battery have been generated using 336 normal elders who identify as African American, white, Chinese, Hispanic, or Vietnamese. To be healthy emotionally, you need to be able to sit with your feelings and understand them. As your brain changes, you may even find yourself forgetting things more often than you used to. Although the two concepts may seem similar, there are key differences that cannot be overlooked. Building on the differences explored in the previous sections, further distinctive elements are analyzed in the table below.

Other Health Problems That Could Cause Cognitive Problems

Neurodegenerative disorders are proposed to account for the majority of cognitive decline in older adults. Research in 2011 found walking gait especially accurate for predicting how long an old person will live. Future research is focused on early detection of the condition, so that it may be slowed or even prevented. A person diagnosed in their 60's will live longer than someone diagnosed in their 90's. To help alleviate any stress associated with your visit to the physician, it is best to be as prepared as possible. Commonly affects adults at an earlier age and is associated with a very rare genetic condition. Click here to know more about alzheimers and dementia.

from Blogger https://ift.tt/2ZM1qEg via Alzheimer's Help and Resources

#Alzheimers #Dementia #Senior Care

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dinafbrownil · 5 years ago

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Parenting Your Aging Parents When They Don’t Want Help

Navigating Aging

Navigating Aging focuses on medical issues and advice associated with aging and end-of-life care, helping America’s 45 million seniors and their families navigate the health care system.

To contact Judith Graham with a question or comment, click here.

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David Solie’s 89-year-old mother, Carol, was unyielding. “No, I will not move,” she told her son every time he suggested that she leave her home and relocate to a senior living residence.

And it didn’t stop there. Although Carol suffered from coronary artery disease, severe osteoporosis, spinal compression fractures and unsteady balance, she didn’t want assistance. When Solie brought in aides to help after a bad fall and subsequent surgery, his mother fired them in a matter of days.

“In her mind, she considered it a disgrace to have anybody in her home,” Solie said. “This was her domain for over 50 years, a place where she did everything by herself and in her own way.”

Conflicts of this sort often threaten relationships between aging parents and their adult children just when understanding and support are needed the most. Instead of working together to solve problems, families find themselves feuding and riven by feelings of resentment and distress.

Solie got so worked up, he considered going to court and asking for a conservatorship ― a legal arrangement that would have given him control over his mother’s affairs. (The situation was complicated because Solie’s brother, who has Down syndrome, lived at the family home.) But Solie’s lawyer advised that this course of action would destroy his relationship with his mother.

Today, Solie, a health care consultant and writer with a well-regarded blog about aging, sounds the same theme when he consults with adult children caring for parents. Make preserving trust and keeping your relationship intact ― not winning arguments ― a priority, he suggests. What your parents most need is confidence that you’ll listen to them, take their concerns seriously and stay by their side no matter what happens, he says.

How adult children communicate with parents can go a long way toward easing tensions, Solie says. Instead of telling your parent what to do, ask how they’d prefer to solve problems. Elicit their priorities and recognize their values when making suggestions. Give them choices whenever possible. Be attuned to their unexpressed needs and fears.

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When Dr. Lee Lindquist, chief of geriatrics at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine, asked 68 older adults in eight focus groups why they resisted help, the answers varied. They said they were afraid of losing their independence, becoming a burden on loved ones, being taken advantage of and relinquishing control over their lives.

Asked what might make a difference, the older adults said they liked the idea of “interdependence” ― acknowledging that people need one another from childhood to older age. And they found it helpful to think that “by accepting help, they were in turn helping the person providing the help,” according to Lindquist’s study, published last year in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society.

Unfortunately, no amount of patience, compassion or forbearance will work in some conflict-ridden circumstances. But here’s some of what experts have learned:

Be patient. Give your parents time to adjust. At first, Jane Wolf Frances’ 87-year-old mother, Lillian Wolf, wouldn’t consider moving with Jane’s father from New York City to the Los Angeles area, where Frances, her only child, lived.

Although Lillian had Alzheimer’s disease and Frances had planned to give her one-story house to her parents, “I deferred to my mother’s fear that she was going to be losing something essential,” she said.

Jane Wolf Frances (center) with her parents, Jack and Lillian Wolf, in 1963(Courtesy of Jane Wolf Frances)

During three years of caregiving, Frances had learned to not rush her parents. She knew they had slowed down and needed time to process change.

So Frances waited until her parent’s home health aide called with concerns about their ability to live independently. After discussing the situation with their physician, Frances approached her mother again. A move to assisted living would be a fresh start, allowing the family to spend more time together, she said. After several conversations, her mother finally agreed.

Frances, a psychologist, is the author of a new book, “Parenting Our Parents: Transforming the Challenge Into a Journey of Love” and founder of www.parentingourparents.org. Stay calm when disagreements arise with your elderly parents and tamp down your emotional reactions, she tells families. Listen carefully to your parents’ concerns and let them know you’re trying to help them accomplish their goals, not impose your agenda.

“It’s often helpful to say to your parents ‘I’m doing this for you; I’d like you to do something for me,’” Frances said. “People who are good parents perk up on that one and will ask, ‘OK, what can I do for you?’ Then, you can tell them, ‘You can let me help you more.’”

Let them know you’re on their side. Denise Brown was convinced her parents, Roger and Sally Loeffler, were making a terrible decision. In the previous year, Roger, 84, had been diagnosed with bladder and prostate cancer and undergone extensive surgery. Sally, 81, had suffered three internal bleeds and had one-third of her stomach removed.

Denise Brown (center) with her siblings and parents, Sally and Roger Loeffler(Courtesy of Denise Brown)

Brown didn’t think they could live on their own anymore, and her parents had moved into a retirement community upon her recommendation. But then, at a family meeting, her mother stood up and said, “I’m not dying in this dump. I hate it here.” As Brown and her siblings turned to their father, he said, “I’ll do whatever your mom wants.”

When her parents decided to move to an apartment, Brown was confrontational. “I raised my voice and said, ‘This is not good, this is terrible,’” she said. “They were shocked, but they said ‘It doesn’t matter; this is what we’re going to do.’”

As Brown thought about her reaction, she realized she thought her parents would be safer and have a more “gentle” death in the retirement community: “Then it occurred to me ― this wasn’t what my parents wanted. They valued their independence. It’s their decision about how the end of life plays out.”

Brown let her parents know she’d respect their wishes but would need to set limits. Her work ― Brown is the founder of http://www.CareGiving.com ― had to be a priority, and her parents would need to arrange other assistance if she couldn’t be available. (Brown’s two brothers and sister help out.) And they’d have to be willing to talk openly about how their choices were affecting her.

What doesn’t work: trying to communicate when any one of them is tired or angry. “We never get anywhere,” Brown said. “Everybody gets defensive and shuts down.”

What does work: “asking them questions like how do you think we should try to solve this problem? It’s interesting to hear their answers, and it makes working together so much easier.”

Stop expecting your parents to be as they used to be. After her father’s death, Loi Eberle was distraught when her mother, Lucille Miller, became involved with a man she and her siblings didn’t like. With his encouragement, Miller invested in real estate and lost a great deal of money.

But nothing Eberle or her siblings said could convince her mother that this relationship was destructive.

Eberle struggled with resentment and anger as her mother’s needs escalated after a heart attack and a diagnosis of myasthenia gravis, a severe neurological disease. “Mom and I had this love/hate relationship all my life, and there was a huge need for healing in this relationship,” she said.

Loi Eberle and her mother, Lucille Miller, in 2012(Courtesy of Loi Eberle)

In 2012, Eberle moved Miller, then 89, from her longtime home in Minneapolis to a nursing home in northern Idaho, near where Eberle lives. Gradually, she realized that her mother “had transitioned to being someone else” ― someone who was vulnerable and at her life’s end.

“I think for a long time I had this idea that I was going to help Mom come back to who she was, and I spent a lot of time trying to do that,” Eberle said. “I finally had to forgive myself for failure and understand that this is the life process.”

With this shift in perspective, emotional tension dissipated. “When I’d visit, my mother was always so happy to see me,” Eberle said. Miller died in March 2017 at age 94.

Letting go of unrealistic expectations can defuse conflicts. This is the final stage of your journey with your parents. Try to put angst to one side and help make this time meaningful for them and for you. Most of all, your parents want to feel emotionally connected and accepted, even in a diminished state.

We’re eager to hear from readers about questions you’d like answered, problems you’ve been having with your care and advice you need in dealing with the health care system. Visit khn.org/columnists to submit your requests or tips.

from Updates By Dina https://khn.org/news/parenting-your-aging-parents-when-they-dont-want-help/

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anna-2807 · 5 years ago

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Let’s talk money – a core concern of any divorce experience

Let’s talk money – a core concern of any divorce experience. Most of us tend to think about money in terms of dollars and cents; about making the “right” financial choices. Money, however, is a much more complex part of our lives. Money has the capacity to trigger powerful subjective emotions in everyone. It symbolizes very different things to different people. Our feelings about money and how to manage it are largely dependent on our own unique family history.

In an earlier newsletter, I spoke of the goals of divorce as twofold; severing both the legal bonds and the emotional bonds. A viable divorce can only result from a careful and balanced consideration of these two distinct needs. Since money is intimately connected with divorce and divorce attorneys play an instrumental role in assisting their clients to create successful financial resolutions, it is imperative that they understand how the hot button of money can evoke emotional fireworks and disrupt the resolution of financial matters.

How Attitudes And Feelings Towards Money Impact Relationships

An individual’s interaction with money is one of the most important relationships in his or her life. The way someone feels about money says more about them than they may realize.

Usually, money is thought of in black-and-white terms – either there is enough of it or there isn’t. The truth is that money is chock full of psychological, emotional and symbolic meanings. A person’s relationship with money mirrors his or her conflicts, vulnerabilities fears, needs and desires.

Think about it. Money affects career and relationship choices. It is reflected in personal matters of control, self-esteem and even contributes to your overall sense of well-being. Most of the decisions people makes are formed, in part, by their individual beliefs about money.

Equating love and money, something frequently learned from one’s nuclear family, is an example of how money and feelings can be intertwined. Parents who don’t spend enough time with their children often say “I love you” by showering them with material gifts. When these children become adults, they can easily feel unloved unless that love is demonstrated with some material item.

An individual’s self-esteem can directly impact financial decisions as well as spending habits. If someone feels they don’t measure up to their own expectations or those of others, they might find themselves making costly and unnecessary purchases that only temporarily soothe their feelings of inadequacy and low worth.

Depression, anger, retaliation, boredom, envy, and the need to control others – all of these emotions can affect financial decisions. Emotional spending can be expensive and destructive.

Ideas about money can be gender-based. To many women, desiring money is considered greedy. Talking about it and going after it are unlady like. It is not unusual for women to hand over their economic lives to their husbands. This results in a kind of denial about money which sounds something like this; “I’ll do what it takes to get money but I don’t want to think about it.”

Women also sometimes equate money and care taking. It is not uncommon for successful, high-income earners who are capable of financial self-reliance to look to their spouses to support them. In their “book of rules,” if a man truly loves and cares for them, he will be the provider.

While women typically view divorce as the loss of a relationship, men are more likely to think of divorce in terms of division of property and assets. Women may be reluctant to stop thinking in terms of “our property,” while their husbands have little difficulty avoiding an “our property” mind-set.

Finally, the meaning of “security” and how to attain it may have different meanings to the divorcing spouses. A person can feel secure even though he may not be secure at all. Conversely, a person can be secure feel totally insecure. These attitudes will surely affect negotiating financial settlements.

Money And Emotions = “Oil And Water”

When a marriage breaks up, the last thing anyone feels like doing is crunching numbers. In the grip of fear for one’s very survival, physically and emotionally, exercising rational judgement can be an uphill battle. Add to that individual idiosyncratic feelings about money and the reality that many human beings have difficulty making logical decisions when it comes to their personal finances, it is no wonder that divorcing people find themselves in need of solid financial and emotional advice.

Emotions and money are a dangerous combination.

During the divorce negotiations, they need to be kept separate. Like oil and water, trying to mix money and emotions is futile. When it comes to dealing with money,emotions can be the client’s worst enemy, leading to both higher legal bills and frazzled nerves.

So, how do you help your client keep emotions out of the picture when attempting to resolve money matters? The key is helping the client to understand that while divorce is an emotional experience, and heart-wrenching personal and financial decisions must be made, these decisions need to be entered into with a dispassionate and business-like frame of mind. In other words, they need to think of themselves as making a business deal, one in which emotions must not be permitted to influence sound judgement.

Put simply, there is no place for a vindictive attitude or guilty feelings. Unresolved emotions must be either left at home or worked through with the help of a divorce counselor.

Tips For Helping Your Clients Deal With The Pain Of Dividing The Assets

During the divorce negotiations, your clients sense of worth and value will be in different places. Some will have moved beyond the walking-wounded stage while others will still be seeking revenge.

Ideally, neither person is a victim or a bully, but rather is a decent human being who wants to deal fairly with their spouse in resolving economic issues. Unfortunately, the reality is that many will still be too overwhelmed by feelings of fear, self-pity, anger, failure, and guilt to behave rationally.

The following tips will help your clients to eliminate any tendencies they may have to endanger their long-term economic interests by allowing their emotions to impede their judgement.

Be Involved. This is the time to encourage clients to relinquish their murky and oblique relationship to money. It is not enough for them to want to feel financially secure. They need to learn to think about their money and examine it. If they have previously left money matters in their spouse’s hands, now is the time for them to assume responsibility for their own economic interests.

Commit To A Budget. As newly single people learning to manage money independently, clients need to understand the importance of successful budgeting. They need to be realistic about their spending habits and prepared to adapt their budget to adjust to any lifestyle changes that may occur, whether these changes are for the better or worse.

Communicate. Divorcing individuals need to develop and be encouraged to maintain a relationship with a competent financial advisor. This means selecting a professional with whom they are comfortable communicating how their financial plan is being maintained and making any adjustments along the way, as needed.

Develop a new mind set. Keep reminding clients that they have separate, distinct, and competitive economic interests with their spouse. If they are to competently take charge of their divorce, they must see their property in terms of “yours” and “mine,” and no longer view assets as “ours.”

Banish Guilt. If your client is tempted to relinquish their share of the assets, remind them that they cannot “buy” away his or her guilty feelings. Suggest to them that they seek help from a professional divorce counselor so that their guilt does not blind them to what is reasonable and appropriate.

Avoid Settling Prematurely. Be aware of those clients who want to settle for less than what they are entitled to simply because they want the divorce to be over. Reinforce their need to build a strong and healthy future for themselves and help them to see that avoidance behavior will be very costly in the long run.

Don’t Allow Feelings of Helplessness. If your client is stuck in the ”woe is me” trap and is not producing the necessary documents and lists or is unwilling to discuss certain financial matters, remind the client that he has value and is capable of unwinding joint finances.

Is money a sign of power?

Do they use money to boost self-esteem?

Do they avoid budgeting?Saving?Investing?

Perhaps it is not more money they need to attain happiness, but instead a new state of mind about earning, spending and investing money.

Conclusion

Try telling someone who is in the throes of dividing marital property that “money doesn’t buy happiness.” It will not go over well. Divorcing men and women, overwhelmed by emotions, often react financially to their feelings. Sometimes, it is easier for them to make financial decisions about what they are entitled to based on hurt, anger or guilt rather than making a sound decision based on a working knowledge of finances.

When assisting their clients with the difficult task of dividing marital property, attorneys must do two things; validate their feelings and help them to keep these feelings separate from the business at hand. Financial decision making cannot be a forum for expressing deep emotions. Clients need assistance to mindfully examine their finances and let go of any emotionally driven approach /avoidance relationship with this most fundamental part of their life.

Read more at Emotional Turmoil

#Relationship Expert #Relationship Counseling Online #Relationship Counselor #Divorce Counselor #Expert Divorce Counselor #Couples Counseling #Individual Counseling #Mental Health Counselor #Mental Health Counseling #Mental Health Support

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mounicalucia-blog · 6 years ago

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GUIDING YOUR CLIENTS THROUGH THE EMOTIONAL TURMOIL OF DIVIDING THE ASSETS

Let’s talk money — a core concern of any divorce experience.

Let’s talk money — a core concern of any divorce experience. Most of us tend to think about money in terms of dollars and cents; about making the “right” financial choices. Money, however, is a much more complex part of our lives. Money has the capacity to trigger powerful subjective emotions in everyone. It symbolizes very different things to different people. Our feelings about money and how to manage it are largely dependent on our own unique family history.

How Attitudes And Feelings Towards Money Impact Relationships

An individual’s interaction with money is one of the most important relationships in his or her life. The way someone feels about money says more about them than they may realize. Usually, money is thought of in black-and-white terms — either there is enough of it or there isn’t. The truth is that money is chock full of psychological, emotional and symbolic meanings. A person’s relationship with money mirrors his or her conflicts, vulnerabilities fears, needs and desires.

Depression, anger, retaliation, boredom, envy, and the need to control others — all of these emotions can affect financial decisions. Emotional spending can be expensive and destructive.

Money And Emotions = “Oil And Water”

Emotions and money are a dangerous combination.

Tips For Helping Your Clients Deal With The Pain Of Dividing The Assets

During the divorce negotiations, your clients sense of worth and value will be in different places. Some will have moved beyond the walking-wounded stage while others will still be seeking revenge. Ideally, neither person is a victim or a bully, but rather is a decent human being who wants to deal fairly with their spouse in resolving economic issues. Unfortunately, the reality is that many will still be too overwhelmed by feelings of fear, self-pity, anger, failure, and guilt to behave rationally.

The following tips will help your clients to eliminate any tendencies they may have to endanger their long-term economic interests by allowing their emotions to impede their judgement.

Don’t Allow Feelings of Helplessness. If your client is stuck in the ”woe is me” trap and is not producing the necessary documents and lists or is unwilling to discuss certain financial matters,remind the client that he has value and is capable of unwinding joint finances.

Stress Honesty. Suggest to clients that they do some introspection and assess how they really feel about money. They can ask themselves the following questions that may help identify the psychological factors driving their financial behaviour: Is money a sign of power? Do they use money to boost self-esteem? Do they avoid budgeting? Saving? Investing? Perhaps it is not more money they need to attain happiness, but instead a new state of mind about earning,spending and investing money.

Conclusion

Money carries multiple meanings to people and can trigger unique responses in them. Money is used to support, protect, honor, manipulate, reject and hurt others. Some divorcing people will lie and cheat for money, others will turn their backs on money to their own disadvantage. Try telling someone who is in the throes of dividing marital property that “money doesn’t buy happiness.” It will not go over well. Divorcing men and women, overwhelmed by emotions, often react financially to their feelings. Sometimes, it is easier for them to make financial decisions about what they are entitled to based on hurt, anger or guilt rather than making a sound decision based on a working knowledge of finances.

Visit — https://drdeborahhecker.com/guiding-your-clients-through-the-emotional-turmoil-of-dividing-the-assets/

#divorce and emotional turmoil #couple counselling #individualcounslling #marriage counseling

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battybat-boss · 6 years ago

Text

Publicly Open Pedophile Running for Office in Virginia Reveals How Foster Care is a Pipeline to Adopt Children as “Sex Toys”

Nathan Larson, admitted pedophile, recommends adopting children for the purpose of using them as sex toys. Photo from his now-defunct website, NathanLarson.org.

by Health Impact News/MedicalKidnap.com Staff

An independent candidate running for office in Virginia has admitted to being a pedophile. Nathan Larson is a 37-year-old accountant running for the U.S. House of Representatives in Virginia's 10th district.

As his extremely disturbing views on child rape, white supremacy, and more have come to light, the first reaction of many has been to hope that this was fake news.

Sadly, it is not. Huffington Post reported the story last last week, and since then, many media outlets from Newsweek and The Hill to Fox and CBS have covered the story of the admitted pedophile.

HuffPo's Jesselyn Cook conducted a phone interview with him and confirmed that he was the creator of websites suiped.org and incelocalypse.today, which Cook describes as “chat rooms that served as gathering places for pedophiles and violence-minded misogynists like himself.” The websites were taken down last week.

His campaign manifesto for his congressional run has since been taken down also, but an archived copy is available here.

Between the interview, the websites, and his manifesto, there are enough vile, disgusting, radical views to keep the media occupied for days. The level of depravity within his writings is difficult to comprehend, and frankly, it turns the stomach.

There is one aspect of his demented views that has garnered very little press. Yet, for readers who are concerned about the kidnapping of children for the adoption and foster care industry, it is an aspect that must not be overlooked. It reveals a very dark side to the industry that the media, even now, refuses to address.

He confirmed to HuffPo that he wrote under the pseudonyms Leucosticte and Lysander. Under those names he has written to his followers who are pedophiles like him that they should endeavor to make enough money so that they can adopt children – for the purpose of using them as sex toys.

Warning: Graphic and Disturbing Language

Huffington Post reported:

As Lysander on suiped.org, a forum for “suicidal pedophiles,” Larson wrote numerous posts endorsing child rape and other forms of sexual abuse.

“Why doesn't every pedo just focus on making money so they can get a pedo-wife and then either impregnate her with some fucktoys or adopt some fucktoys?” he wrote on the platform in October. “That would accommodate both those who are and aren't into incest. And of course, the adoption process lets you pick a boy or a girl.”

Apparently, he has already acted upon part of this philosophy. According to the Colorado Springs Independent, he raped his ex-wife and she conceived. She left him before their daughter was born, moved away, then she became trans-gender, using the name Finn:

… in a legal document that Finn filled out to waive child support in February, he writes of Larson, “During our relationship, he was severely emotionally and sexually abusive towards me.

He stated multiple times that he wanted to have sex with a child. He talked about how he would manipulate and trick the child into giving him sex, told me he wouldn't love the child if they did not have sex with him, and stated he had no interest in children other than sexual … [He] raped me until I was pregnant and stated his intention to have sex with my child after she was born.” (Source).

Not long after this, Finn committed suicide. Larson only saw his daughter once, under supervision. The Colorado Springs Independent states that the maternal grandparents have custody of the baby.

While it is obvious that he has no business having custody of his daughter, it may not be so obvious that Larson's views about adoption are not isolated. Most with his views don't speak so openly about them, but the numbers make it clear that there are many who participate in fostering and adopting for the purposes of gratifying their deviant desires.

This is a very ugly part of the adoption industry that is difficult to talk about, and it is difficult for people to hear. But we must see it. Sick people who engage in such acts can and do foster and adopt children, and much of that happens through the Child “Protective” System.

Though certainly not every adopter shares views similar to Larson's, there are many who do.

Health Impact News has long warned that part of the reason that children are stolen from their parents is to provide children for the sex trafficking trade. The more that we learn, the more that we realize how much more common this is than we ever knew.

Foster Care to Sex Trafficking Pipeline

Earlier this year we reported that Attorney Michael Dolce wrote an opinion piece for Newsweek in which he explained that the foster care system is basically set up to sexually traffic children. He wrote:

Here's the ugly truth: most Americans who are victims of sex trafficking come from our nation's own foster care system. It's a deeply broken system that leaves thousands vulnerable to pimps as children and grooms them for the illegal sex trade as young adults.

We have failed our children by not fixing the systemic failures that have allowed this to happen for decades.

See:

Attorney Reporting in Newsweek: Foster Care is a System Set Up to Sex Traffic American Children

1000 Convicted Sex Offenders in LA Approved as Fosters

Filmmaker Sean Stone interviewed Tammi Stefano, Executive Director of The National Safe Child Coalition, in 2015. Tammi revealed some shocking information about the unholy alliance between Child Protective Services and the child sex trafficking trade:

Stefano replied that what she discovered, and what the Los Angeles Times was kind enough to publish, was that 1000 “convicted sex offenders” had been given a “green light” by CPS to become “approved foster parents” just in Los Angeles County.

Filmmaker Sean Stone interviews Tammi Stefano. Image from YouTube.

CPS Putting Children into Sex Trafficking is a Huge Problem

At around the 25:15 point in the interview, Stone and Stefano begin to discuss the child sex trafficking problem. When Stone asks Stefano if she has encountered sex trafficking among children, she replies: “We need to cover it a lot more.”

As an example, she mentioned a sex trafficking case with CPS in Orange County, California last year. Stefano says that of 105 sexually abused victims that were found in this case, 65% of those victims were in the foster care system under CPS control, and they were allegedly never reported missing. Stefano says:

What we are finding now is this trafficking is a lot bigger, and a lot more involved politically, than we care to look at, or the media won't cover. Everybody is afraid, because there are some really big heavy hitters that are very influential that are involved.

Children have been sold, and there have been cases, where children have been sold up to 75 times in one day. 75 times in one day…. someone has abused this child.

The child trafficking industry, or human trafficking industry right now, makes more money than the illegal drug trade, and illegal arms trade, combined.

So, children are definitely a commodity. They are a commodity to make money.

See:

Child Sex Trafficking through Child “Protection” Services Exposed – Kidnapping Children for Sex

State-Kidnapped Child Given to Pedophile

We reported the tragic story of beautiful little Devani of Arizona, stolen from her mother for bogus reasons, and placed by Arizona Department of Child Services (DCS) with a man who used her in his pedophile pornography ring and committed horrible acts of sexual violence against her.

Devani, “the little girl in the blue dress,” was a victim of a pedophile foster parent. Photo from AZ Childrens Lives Matter Facebook page.

Devani was not his first, or his last, victim. Despite obvious clues that he was raping foster and adoptive children, social workers continued to place innocent children with this monster, who is finally in prison serving a 17-year sentence for his crimes. See:

Arizona Child Removed from Loving Family and Placed into Foster Care Where She was Repeatedly Raped – then 80% of Body Burned

Arizona Foster Care System Revealed as Pedophile Ring: Former Foster Child Tortured for Years Sues for $15 Million

State Auditor Finds CPS Doesn't Consider Sexual Abuse of Children Problematic

Massachusetts State Auditor Suzanne Bump was horrified to find that Child Protective Services in her state does not view child sexual abuse of foster children to be a serious problem:

Sexual abuse to children is not considered to be a critical incident, because DCF, in their own words, did not consider sexual abuse to cause serious bodily harm or extreme physical pain.

See:

Massachusetts State Auditor Finds Widespread Rape and Sexual Abuse in Foster Care but DCF Officials Won't Report It

Our experience at Health Impact News in talking with children and adults who were in the foster care/adoptive system is that rape and sexual molestation is quite common in the system. Most reported it to their social workers, but very few saw any type of investigation. Most of the time the incidents were swept under the rug.

It Is All About the Money

Foster care and adoption have never been about what is best for the children. It is about the money – billions of dollars of federal money that come to the states, rewarding and incentivizing the taking of children. Because the bottom line is the money to be made, social workers, supervisors, attorneys, and judges turn a blind eye to the plight of children. It doesn't matter to the system that children are placed with monsters who want to use the children as sex toys.

See:

The U.S. Foster Care System: Modern Day Slavery and Child Trafficking

Child Kidnapping and Trafficking: A Lucrative U.S. Business Funded by Taxpayers Called “Foster Care”

As long as there is money to be made by doing so, and as long as there is no one held accountable for the horrific outcomes to the children placed with traffickers and other child molesting fosters and adopters, the practice will likely continue.

People with views like Larson's exist, in the shadows and on the approved adopter rolls. If his open views shock you, please understand that he is not alone. A growing segment of our society, including those in the entertainment industry, wants to normalize pedophilia. See:

Why I Canceled My Netflix Account and You Should Too: Promoting Pedophilia is NOT OK!

Isn't it time we fight to end this evil, corrupt system called “foster care?”

We recently published an article rebutting Lisa Wheeler's call in the National Review to have more churches participate in the Foster Care program:

State-funded Foster Care and The Church: Part of the Problem, NOT Part of the Solution

The comments we received in social media on this article were mostly from Christian foster parents defending their role in an admittedly corrupt system.

But instead of trying to recruit more foster parents from churches, should not churches and Christians nationwide be working together to abolish such an evil system, allowing churches and other Christian organizations to work directly with families and children in need without state funding?

The current government-funded foster care system is a failed system, beyond reform, and it needs to be abolished. This was the conclusion the late Georgia Senator Nancy Schaefer came to, but she was murdered and did not live long enough to try to accomplish this goal.

Senator Nancy Schaefer: Did her Fight Against CPS Child Kidnapping Cause her Murder?

Molly McGrath Tierney, the former Director of the Baltimore City Department of Social Services, is another one who believes the system is completely broken.

She gave one of the most insightful TEDx talks about the problems with the “Foster Care Industry” – an industry where children become a commodity that profits doctors, lawyers, judges, social workers, advocates, and other organizations, an industry that can only exist by taking other people's children, an industry that damages the very children it purports to be helping. She goes on to explain the trauma inflicted on children by the foster care industry, saying:

… we're digging a wound so deep, I don't believe we have a way of measuring it. This dismantling of families – it has enormous consequences. Kids that grow up outside of families – they don't master the things that can only be learned in that context, like who to trust, how to love, and how to take care of yourself, and that frankly does more damage than the abuse and neglect that brought the kid to my attention in the first place.

youtube

Statistics show that up to 85% of children put into foster care are NOT for reasons of abuse. Statistics also show that children taken out of “troubled homes” fare far worse in foster care than if they had been left in their homes with their biological parents (Source), most of whom are just simply poor.

For the few children that truly need new homes, local communities are in the best position to care for these children, with local institutions such as churches and other non-profits, who are held accountable to their communities and supporters.

We don't need a multi-BILLION dollar federal foster care system that is nothing more than a child trafficking business.

Comment on this article at MedicalKidnap.com.

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fayecallasdatingblog · 7 years ago

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5 Stages Of a Relationship: What Are They & How You Can Pass Them

I bet you’ve noticed that there are five distinct stages of a relationship. Each has its own challenges and rewards.

Think back to your last relationship…or even one you’re in now. Didn’t it change from the start, when you didn’t know each other well, but couldn’t keep your hands off of one another, to the end, when you fully trusted and loved this man? Just like we all evolve from babies to children to adults, so do we evolve in our relationships.

What are the Stages of a Relationship?

We’ll explore each of these stages of a relationship in a minute, but to give you a high-level view, these stages include:

1. Attraction & Romance Stage 2. Struggle Stage 3. Working/Partnership Stage 4. Commitment Stage 5. Real Love Stage

Below, I’ll not only tell you what each of these stages of a relationship looks like but also tell you what’s great about it and what you should look out for as potential problems.

youtube

Stage 1: Attraction & Romance

Enjoy each of the stages of a relationship, particularly the first one.

You’re floating on Cloud 9 after your first date with Sam. The entire evening was perfect. The kiss…amazing. You can’t wait to see him again.

As you’re taking off your makeup, you get a text from Sam. He wants to see you tomorrow!

In this first stage of a relationship, everything is beautiful. You can totally see this working out, and you don’t see any of this man’s flaws, or else you sweep them under the rug. The Attraction & Romance stage of a relationship can last anywhere from a few weeks to even a year or more.

This phase is a bit like being high on love. Just like with drugs, you feel like you can’t get enough…except the drug is this man. There’s actually a scientific cause for it: when you fall in love, your brain releases mad amounts of dopamine and other feel-good chemicals. Why? It goes back to evolution. If two people could connect long enough, they would create offspring and the human race would be perpetuated.

So your brain wants you to fall for this guy. You may not be about makin’ babies, but your brain doesn’t know any better, so it glosses over the negative and emphasizes the positive, whether this guy is actually the one for you long-term or not. But don’t worry; you’ll figure out if he’s the right guy soon enough.

What’s Great About This Relationship Stage

The wonderful thing about the start of a relationship is that you start afresh. You get to know someone new, and by proxy, learn who you are with that person. And those feel-good hormones raging around your brain? They’re pretty amazing (and legal! Legal love drugs!).

Sex tends to be frequent and hot in this stage, so enjoy it! That may change down the road…

Things to Be Aware of in This Relationship Stage

Be aware that in the early days of dating, you may want to go slow. Go slow in terms of revealing your full personality, for starters. I’m not saying you should hide things, but maybe wait a few months to let him know how anal you can be about keeping your house clean rather than screaming at him when he forgets to take his shoes off…or proudly showing him photos of all 18 of your cats.

That being said: while we all naturally put our best foot forward when first meeting and dating someone, remember that being your authentic self is important for the relationship moving forward. So: don’t lie. Be confident in who you are, and know that if this guy is right for you, he’ll like/love you for all your qualities, both good and bad.

Also go slow in terms of announcing your feelings. You might right away feel like you’ve fallen in love with him, but there’s no harm in taking your time to really be sure of your feelings.

Remember that druglike state you’re in; it’s not always reliable in telling you how you feel about someone. Wait until you know him better before professing your love. A study showed that men wait on average 88 days before saying I love you, while women took 134 days. Nothing wrong with that!

Stage 2: The Struggle

The Struggle Stage is a challenging one. Will your relationship survive?

This is where it gets real. You’re comfortable with your partner and are starting to let your hair down around him…but that doesn’t always mean things are harmonious.

Most couples get to this stage…and then break up. This tends to happen after four to six months of being together.

This is where you may have your first (and subsequent) arguments. It’s when the shiny magical fairytale glow of your relationship fades and you start dealing with real things like him leaving the toilet seat up or drinking straight from the carton.

Where are all those magical hormones that made you gloss over these annoyances before??

One or both of you may be struggling with uncertainty in the relationship. Where is it going? Is he The One? Do we want the same things? This is totally normal, by the way, and it’s good to ask yourself these questions because if the answers all indicate that you’re on the right path, you can be reassured of moving forward.

If you were a more subdued version of yourself in stage 1, he may be surprised that you’re not acting the same as you were at the beginning. Now you fart, burp, and bicker. Where’s that sexy lady who wore makeup all the time? You may feel like you’re being genuine but he may feel duped, which is why it’s important to be honest about who you are from the start.

You may both start to test your power in the relationship. Who has the power? If he’s a pushover, you may feel like the challenge is gone. On the other hand, if he strong-arms every decision in the relationship, you may feel overpowered and want out.

What’s Great About This Relationship Stage

Yes, this may be the most challenging aspect of your relationship, but if you can make it through, then you’ll have smooth sailing the rest of your relationship. The Struggle stage is when you can relax and really be comfortable with your partner.

You may not be banging away like bunnies like you were in the early days, but sex takes a much more emotional aspect at this stage. Because you’ve been through a lot and are committed to loving one another, sex becomes an important way of connecting emotionally.

Things to Be Aware of in This Relationship Stage

You’ll need to be flexible to see it through to the next stage. If you’re upset because you feel like your partner is asserting his independence (and you’re threatened by that), realize that in a healthy relationship, couples are two individuals with separate interests. It’s okay to do your own thing, then come back together to spend time with your partner.

Keep the lines of communication open, because that’s the best way to understand your differences and what both of you want moving forward.

At the same time, if the relationship isn’t right, this is probably where you’ll figure it out. If you’ve got insurmountable issues, be okay with walking away rather than staying in a Good Enough relationship.

Stage 3: Working/Partnership

Find thoughtful ways to show him you love him, like cook him dinner.

You’ve made it over the Struggle hump! Woo! But you can’t totally relax just yet in this one of the five stages of a relationship.

It’s all too easy to become overly comfortable with your partner…to the point where you no longer put in the effort to make him happy. You already got him, so why do those little things like rub his back or pick up his dry cleaning?

Because you love him, that’s why!

A relationship without these thoughtful efforts is just a friendship, really. It takes work to stay attuned to your partner’s needs and do things that will show him that you care. Relationships take effort, but yours shouldn’t feel like work. If you genuinely love him, it should come naturally for you to do sweet things for him.

Even though we’re going to move onto Stage 4, realize that this Working/Partnership stage never really ends. You need to continually work to be a good partner.

What’s Great About This Relationship Stage

After all the struggle, it’s nice to coast along just a bit in this stage. And if you’re both putting in the effort to keep wooing one another, it can feel pretty fantastic to be on the receiving end of thoughtful gestures!

Things to Be Aware of in This Relationship Stage

One issue I see with couples is that they aren’t attuned to the other’s Love Languages.

You may think putting cute love notes in his lunch pack is a great way to show affection (because your Love Language is words of affirmation), he may actually prefer spending a quiet evening drinking wine and chatting because his Language is quality time. We often project what we want from others onto them, and that’s where issues arise.

Make sure you know what he sees as an appreciated way of expressing your love to him. Does he love being touched, like hugs and massages? Does he enjoy receiving gifts? Does he glow when you do something nice like make him dinner? Whatever he responds positively to indicates what his Love Language is.

Stage 4: Commitment

Once you reach the Commitment stage, you know things are solid.

This is usually when couples get married, move in together, or otherwise commit to one another formally. The difficult part is behind you, and you’re reassured that you’re right for one another.

You’ve learned how to balance your needs versus his needs versus the needs of the two of you as a couple, and you respect one another’s need for time away. You’ve mastered your communications and know how to bring up an issue before it becomes huge.

You’re not with this man because you need him…but because you want him. And that’s excellent!

What’s Great About This Relationship Stage

Obviously however you decide to commit to one another is a pretty big perk at this stage of the relationship. But you can also look at it as the beginning of something great. That might be starting a family or really considering yourself a bona fide couple. People in this stage are usually more confident in love than at any other stage.

Things to Be Aware of in This Relationship Stage

While you might think great! All the hard work is done! but you’re wrong. With whatever transition your commitment requires comes a lot of change. If you’re moving in together, you’ve got to acclimate to living with someone else with totally different living habits than your own. Trust me: fights about the dumbest stuff will ensue.

How could he use the last of the toilet paper and not replace the roll?

Why do you have to do all the grocery shopping?

Do his friends have to come over and play poker every Friday?

You may even worry that this was a big mistake, but give it time. Usually, these issues seem huge at first and then they die down and you get used to living together.

And if you’re getting married, there’s plenty of stress that comes with that ritual. Interestingly, the less you spend on the wedding, the less stressed you’ll be in the planning process!

Know that this upheaval isn’t indicative of what your relationship will be like moving forward. Give it time to settle.

Stage 5: Real Love

Once you’ve surpassed the other stages, you can enjoy real love!

Reeaaal love! I’m searchin’ for a real love!

Just like good ole Mary J. Blige, we’re all looking for real love, and it comes as the last of the stages of a relationship.

After all of your ups and downs, you’re still head over heels for your guy. His touch still feels like electricity, and you love hopping in bed with him. Years may have passed, but you still remember those butterflies you felt when you first kissed.

You may have arguments or issues, but ultimately they work out because you are now so confident in your relationship.

Congratulations. Far fewer people than you’d think actually make it to this stage…even if they’ve been together for decades.

What’s Great About This Relationship Stage

What’s great about this stage? LOVE! Knowing that you will wake up every morning to your true partner, the man who gets you and supports you no matter what is pretty fabulous.

As you grow older together, you continue to get to know each other in new ways. You may think you know every story in his mental library…then he’ll pull out a new one.

Things to Be Aware of in This Relationship Stage

While the previous stages of a relationship have focused heavily on you as a couple, now you may branch out to work on goals outside of your relationship. Maybe you want to retire early so you work on how to make that financially possible. Maybe you want to move to Bali. Or adopt a horse. These are goals that you can share and work on together.

Just as important are the goals that you have individually. The great thing about having a real life and love partner is that he will always support your goals. Want to quit your job and start a business? He’s your biggest cheerleader.

Find things to focus on both together and individually to enhance your relationship.

Conclusion:

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I find it helpful to know the stages of a relationship so I know what’s coming up next. If you’re in the Attraction & Romance stage, you can identify that everything feels floaty and wonderful for a reason (those darn hormones again). That can help you make smart decisions about being with this guy.

If you’re in the Struggle stage, you might feel reassured knowing that it’s perfectly normal to be confused about what comes next. If you’re in the Working stage and realize that you haven’t been putting as much energy into showing your appreciation and love, that’s your opportunity to do so.

No matter where you are, put your focus on being the best partner you can be. That will take work, but it’s an investment that has a huge dividend that pays out over your entire life.

Talk to me. Which of these stages of a relationship are you in, or how far have you gotten in past relationships? Leave a comment below.

If you’re stuck in the first three stages of a relationship and are ready to move into the Commitment stage, join me on this free training to learn how to avoid the “casual relationship trap and get him to commit.

The post 5 Stages Of a Relationship: What Are They & How You Can Pass Them appeared first on Sexy Confidence.

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johnwiliam19 · 7 years ago

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Salt Lake City Lawyer Talks About Innocent Shooting

Recently, the story of a Utah police officer shooting a dog in its owner’s backyard went viral, and perhaps with good reason, Salt Lake City attorneys say. Beginning with a video posted to Facebook, the story gathered steam via social and news media, and the resulting outrage by the public has raised questions over the series of events that led to the death of the innocent, reportedly non-aggressive pet. According to the article in the Salt Lake Tribune, police officers were searching for a missing 3-year-old boy in the Sugar House area when one of the officers entered a private backyard and shot a Weimaraner in the head, killing it on the absent owner’s property.

The video that went viral shows the owner of the dog, Sean Kendall, confronting the Salt Lake City police officer upon arriving at his house and learning that his dog had been killed. He reports that he received a phone call from Animal Control informing him of the situation, and asks the question the public has since been demanding an answer to: “What was the cause for an officer to shoot and kill my dog?” It has not yet been reported whether Kendall is looking into getting legal counsel from Salt Lake City attorneys, and the city’s police department “has revealed little information about the shooting except to say that the dog acted aggressively when the officer entered its backyard as he searched for the missing child.”

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The officer who pulled the trigger remained on duty and was eventually cleared of any wrongdoing, but the comments on the news articles and in social media about the incident demand that the results aren’t good enough. The executive director of the Humane Society of Utah speaks for much of the public response when he queries, “Why, when there are so many non-lethal alternatives available (pepper spray, tasers, batons, etc.), that this officer hose to use deadly force as his first go-to option?”

Unfortunately, according to some Salt Lake City attorneys, Kendall may not have any legal recursive action available to him. Litigators for civil suits don’t encourage Kendall to be hopeful about filing a case, as property damage claims will likely be small comfort in the face the grief incurred by the death of a pet.

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This has been a big enough deal of an incident that the City Council has commented on it, sending a letter to Police Chief Chris Burbank and informing the police department of an independent review to be conducted by the Police Civilian Review Board, with the request that “both investigations be thorough and deliberate, with the results released to the public as soon as possible.”

But even local Salt Lake City attorneys acknowledge that the results of the report will do little to appease the anger of the community, which is partly why the City Council has requested that Burbank “educate” the public on policies of law enforcement surrounding searching for a missing child. No one wants to see another incident like this one anytime soon.

Free Initial Consultation with Lawyer

It’s not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when. Legal problems come to everyone. Whether it’s your son who gets in a car wreck, your uncle who loses his job and needs to file for bankruptcy, your sister’s brother who’s getting divorced, or a grandparent that passes away without a will -all of us have legal issues and questions that arise. So when you have a law question, call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.

Ascent Law LLC8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite CWest Jordan, Utah 84088 United StatesTelephone: (801) 676-5506

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