#and get incredibly sad and upset that this is how my life is turning out
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I get mad about Fb posts too!! I struggle with being jealous of others and it makes me hate myself. I wish I wasn't like this lol
I relate to this so much omg
#I’ve been struggling a looooot with jealousy and being envious#I think it’s just hard to see people I know thriving when I’m trying so hard to simply survive#I haven’t been able to go over to my sisters new place cause I’m just too jealous#and I HATE it cause I want to be happy for them#it’s a big thing to get a place or get married or have a baby or whatever#that’s huge and if it’s someone I know and love I want to be happy for them#but I can’t help but also look at myself and my own life#and get incredibly sad and upset that this is how my life is turning out#I wanted to do so many things with my life#but this stupid mental illness is fucking everything up#I’m just so so so sick of it#I want to live a normal life like other people I know#I went over to a new friends place and I’m still thinking about it#she’s depressed and struggling with chronic illnesses like I am#but she got married a few years ago and the husband is helping so much#they have this beautiful townhouse that I would KILL for#and they have a golden retriever#and it’s just so hard to see someone who is struggling like I am but still has all of these things#I’d fucking kill for a pet or a place of my own#I’m so SO sick of living here and not having a safe space I can go to when I need to be by myself#just having my car is such a shitty feeling#but I know I’m privileged I have a roof over my head and I have a car I can run to#I just wish I was in her position or everyone else who is in a better position/situation than I am#and I know I know it’s not all black and white I’m sure there are struggles behind the camera that I’m not seeing#but it’s still the fact that they have a place to go to or they have a dog to be with and get comfort from#it’s just so fucking hard#I can’t help compare my life to theirs every single time I see a happy post#and don’t even get me started on how much I spiral when I see they are younger than me and doing better than I am#ooooooh boy#ask
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Oh StarClan... your dash has turned into warrior cats again.
#sorry <3 #this one has parts that are based off of that #one post rhats like "if there were cat-people #do you think calico tboys would try to dye over their patches"
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🔁 🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow reblogged
🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow
Me & Night (my mate)!!!
🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow
:O Kip's mate has finally been revealed!!! And his name is Night? Cooool.
🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow
Yeah haha. Technically his full name is Night Hunter, Bringer of Darkness, but it feels so weirdly formal calling him that, so I usually stick to just Night.
#life #kittypet #collar tw #cw collars #id in alt text
8,504 notes
🛤 carnation-stem-02 Follow
I find it really funny when I see cats on here vaguepost about big blogs. Like cmon mouse-brain everyone here knows who you're talking about. Just say their name.
#this is about that one mommy blogger shitting on kipper the kittypet #btw #in case some of you couldnt tell #would be funny if it wasnt so stupid
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🔁 🐍xviper-the-fagx reblogged
🥬 rxttencatmint Follow
Hahaaaaa.... my mother found out ive been slowly dyeing my ginger patches black...
🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
Why would you do that??? Being a tortie is so cool, I wish I had ginger patches! They're so pretty, why do you want to get rid of them???
🥬 rxttencatmint Follow
Uhm. Gender dysphoria??
Like. I know cis male tortoiseshells exist but they're so rare that most cats take one look at me and go "oh, tortie, must be a girl" and that hurts.
🪺 robbbinpaw Follow
OH STARCLAN im so sorry Rot i wasnt even thinking about you being trans, I probably sounded really insensitive... I do understand what you're saying now.
Didn't even ask, how did your mom take it? Does she know why?
🥬 rxttencatmint Follow
You're fine <3 I get it. And no, she uh.. has no clue why I did it, she thinks I'm in my "emo phase" or something.
🐍 xviper-the-fagx
Uhh unrelated but what do you use to dye your fur?? Asking for... science...
#"science" meaning i am also a tortie tboy #well technically i'm calico but ykwim
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🔁 🦋 lalala-bluegaze Follow reblogged
🦢 gentlesong-momof17 Follow
I can't be the only one here who thinks it's unfair to allow kittypets on this site. Posting pictures of themselves and their mates inside of the twolegplace, influencing the young kits on this site to abandon their Clans... surely everyone else sees the problem with this as well.
This is Clanblr, not "Kittypetblr". This was specifically made as a space for Clan cats to connect, not for kittypets to push their lifestyle on us.
They're going to convince our kits to abandon their home and their belief in StarClan just for a more secure life.
#EXACTLY #I only recently found out ex-tc Kipper was a kittypet #it was so upsetting to me because i've always loved his wood-scratch art #to find out he's a clan-abandoner was so saddening
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🔁 🐍xviper-the-fagx reblogged
🌻 l1llyst3m Follow
The recent drama surrounding Kipper the Kittypet is sad and I hate that he's being bashed just for existing, but it's also incredibly stupid. I believe the cat who wrote the original post said something like, "it's CLANblr, not KITTYPETblr," and then something about belief in StarClan and I just... do you even realize how many Clanblr mods are non-Clan and/or don't believe in StarClan?
To name a few, @s-t-a-r-burning is former WindClan now rogue & openly an atheist, @theshadowhaseyes has been a kittypet his whole life, and @ssuunnrraayy-p has made zir entire blog about how ze travels from one Clan to another & doesnt consider zimself a Clan cat. Those are all mods. "It's clanblr no-" shut up. Just shut up.
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🧷 name-lists-by-theme
Theme: Water
as always, these work as either part of your name, but they are intended as the first part!
-Abyss
-Bay
-Bog
-Cove
-Creek
-Current
-Dew
-Fog
-Lagoon
-Lake
-Marsh
-Mist
-Pond
-Pool
-Puddle
-Rain
-Shallow
-Sleet
-Spray
-Splash
-Storm
-Stream
-Torrent
Keep reading
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🐱 berrrrry-o Follow
I think a lot of cats put way too much emphasis on the parts of the warrior code that dont matter, and forget the parts that do, like "feed elders and kits first" and "never neglect a kit in pain or danger"... I feel like those are significantly more important than "a warrior rejects the soft life of a kittypet," but maybe that's just me.
#berry yaps #I'm irritated by the kittypet drama going on on this site
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🔁 🛤 carnation-stem-02 Follow reblogged
🔲 sag3-chas3s-squirr3ls-deactivated
I feel like we don't talk enough about how SkyClan got chased out of their own territory during a time of crisis rather than all of the Clans trying to make room for everyone...
I mean, seriously. I know it's taught to all SkyClan apprentices, but I've talked to some of my friends from other Clans and they just. Didn't know that. They were never taught that the other Clans allowed SkyClan to be chased out due to territory loss.
🔲 sstep-xoxo-deactivated
:/ im pretty sure the whole thing about skclan being kicked out of their territory is just a conspiracy theory
🔲 sag3-chas3s-squirr3ls-deactivated
Imagine trying to tell a cat that they don't know their own Clan's history 💀
#ohh i finally found it again #that 1 fucker trying to say that skyclan's history is a "conspiracy theory"
20,056 notes
🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow
:/ I do not like being stuck on the wrong site.
#fakeposting#fake dash#fake dashboard#warrior cats#warriors#warriors dashboard simulator#warriors dashboard sim#dash sim#warrior cats dashboard#cat dashboard simulator#dashboard simulator#dash simulator#unreality#clanblr
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Since your doing the DP and Wolverine prompts does this mean that Nora’s used Jaunes dead body as a weapon or just his sword?
Deadpool used Logan's bones because they are metal, so in this case I chose a third option that I came up with. --------------
Nora arrives at a forest where a cross marks the site of a grave.
Nora: (Narrating) For a long time, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be back. VIZ Media bought RWBY, there was a whole boring rights issue, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But then, it turned out that they wanted me! the one girl who shouldn’t even have her own show! That was all so stupid. Look, we know the title of this thing, so I know what you’re wondering. How are we going to do this without dishonoring Jaune's memory? And I’ll tell you how. We’re not.
Nora then starts digging
Nora: (Narrating) I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Jaune is not dead. Sure, it made for a perfect ending to a very sad story, but that’s not how his Aura boosting thing works. You think I want to be out here in beautiful downtown North of Vale, digging up the one and only Rusted Knight? No, thank you. But the fate of my entire world is at stake. He may not be living his best life, but he sure as hell ain’t dead.
Nora finally reaches the bottom and finds the coffin.
Nora: Bingo... Yahtzee...
She then begins to tear apart the coffin.
*Smack! Tap! Scratch! Bang!*
Nora: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
*Crack!*
She makes a hole in the coffin and then…
Nora: Damn it!
She didn't like what she found.
Nora: Son of a bitch! *Hits the cross* Fuck! Motherfucker! My world is fucked!
Moments later....
Nora leaning against a fallen tree
Nora: *Talking to his right while the camera is only focus on her* That was weird. I’m much calmer now. Look, I’m not a woman of science, but you seem incredibly passed away.
The camera zooms out to show a very dead and skeleton-like Jaune, but still wearing his armor.
Nora: But it’s good to see ya. I gotta be honest, I’ve always wanted to ride with you, Jaune. You and me, getting into a Ladypool and Rusted Knight. Just fucking shit up. Can you imagine the fun,... the chaos,... the residuals?
She then starts playing with Jaune's helmet.
Nora: (Mimicking Jaune's voice) That's right Nora. There’s nothing that’ll bring me back to life faster than a big bag of RWBY cash.
Nora: Me too, Jaune. *Gets upset* No, no, no, no. Ugh, he had to get all noble and die for real. God damn it! *Looks back at Jaune* I could really use your help right now.
Suddenly, a group of futuristic soldiers appear out of nowhere. Nora sees them and hides along with Jaune's corpse.
Nora: Wait! I’m warning you! I’m not alone!
Soldier: Nora Valkyrie! You’re under arrest by the Time Variance Authority. Too many crimes with this, come out!
Nora: I hate this guys.
Soldier: Last chance! Throw out your weapons and come out peacefully!
Nora: I’m not gonna give you my weapons! But I promise not to use them. *Looks at you the reader* Did you know that Jaune's armor is made by a lot of pieces together? Here we go, maximum effort.
Nora jumps out of her hiding spot, and uses Jaune's corpse as cover. The soldiers are confused.
Bye Bye Bye by NSYNC It starts to play.
Nora: *Looks at Jaune* Okay, Jaune. I guess we’re getting that team up after all.
Nora grabs a piece of Jaune's armor and throws it at one of the soldiers, killing him instantly. The other companions of the deceased are stunned, but seconds later they run towards them as more soldiers appear.
Nora takes two pieces of armor from Jaune's shoulders and uses them to stab two of the soldiers. One in the back, and the other one she slashes and then stabs him in the head. Following with a kick that makes the piece come out the other side of the guy.
She then uses her leg armor and begins to swing around, hitting the soldiers in the face. She knocks one to the right, another to the ground, and one to the left. She then takes her phone and takes a photo of herself kissing one of the deceased on the helmet.
She then takes both of Jaune's arm armors, bones and all, and begins to slap each and every one of them like it's a game. With what remains of the armor already shattered, she kills the remaining ones. I use Jaune's fingers to stab one of them. Jaune's head to hit another one in the genitals. What's left of the legs to stab quite hard right into the chest of another soldier who was running.
Nora: What is this?
Nora notices a part of the armor that looks like a sword handle and pulls it out. And just at that moment a blue sword blade appears as if it were a lightsaber.
Nora: *GASP!!!!* IT'S THE SWORD OF DESTRUCTION!!!
Nora: I am soaking wet right now.
Nora: (Narrating) To be clear, I’m not proud of any of this. The wanton violence, the whiff of necrophilia, it isn’t who I am, it isn’t who I wanna be. Who I wanna be? Well, to help you understand that, I gotta take you back. My little joy ride I took through space and time, to the day that changed everything.
Nora: (Narrating) But that will be for another day, because the idiot who wrote all this is a little tired.
#nora#nora valkyrie#rwby nora#rwby nora valkyrie#rwby jaune arc#jaune#rwby jaune#jaune arc#deadpool & wolverine#rwby incorrect quotes#rwby#rwby shitpost
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4. Peace and love summary: jealousy on christmas eve, seriously? word counter: 1.277 pairing: jude bellingham X reader a/n: ladies and gentlemen, we have here a jude bellingham who is not lazy about driving.
🎄 christmas prompts 🎄
yn and jude went to the market to buy ingredients for the dessert she will take to the christmas dinner at her fiancé's family's house. this dessert is her mother-in-law's favorite and she makes it every year. It's become a tradition since the first christmas they spent together. yn thinks it's incredible because she managed to win over her mother-in-law through her belly even though she only knows how to make desserts and well, her brother-in-law was the only one who didn't like her cooking, but she says he talks badly about her food out of spite.
but they were both happy, back in their hometown and ready for another christmas together.
"i'll get the butter." i said to jude who nodded and continued his job of picking bananas. "jesus, why did they put the butter so high up?" yn said to herself when she saw that the butter was on a higher shelf than normal. she couldn't even reach it on her tiptoes.
she was about to call jude but someone came up behind her and took what she wanted so much. "here." a tall man who looked a little like jude handed her the butter. "oh, thanks!" she smiled simply. "you're welcome! the marketemployees forget that there are short people like you." he joked. "hey, I'm not even that short." yn laughed and put her hand on the necklace she had with bellingham's initial on it.
and speaking of bellingham, even 20 feet away from where the love of his life was, he was keeping an eye on the stranger's interaction with her. he didn't know whether to tie the bag of bananas or pay attention to their body posture, since he couldn't hear anything.
"so, thank you again." yn already had her hand on the cart ready to find jude. "just wait a second, let me remember where we know each other from." the man left yn confused. "i don't think we've met before." he smiled. "you're right, a face as beautiful as yours is unforgettable."yn felt embarrassed and even more eager to get back to jude. "i'm going to try to guess your name, from your necklace it starts with a j, right?" he asked "no, that's the initial of my fiancé's name." the man scratched his head and yn turned towards jude who was walking towards her and with his eyes fixed on the man "oh, sorry! merry christmas." the man said and left before jude even arrived.
jude is not a jealous guy, he trusts yn too much but something about this situation made him uncomfortable. the way that guy looked at yn and the way she smiled at him. bellingham was jealous and upset.
"did you know him?" jude asked as he put the bananas in the cart. "no, what a crazy guy." yn commented as she pushed the cart "can we go?" jude just nodded.
they paid for their purchases at the checkout, put them in the trunk, and got into the car in silence. jude seemed angry and didn't even look at yn, who didn't understand his behavior at all. "did something happen to you that i didn't see?" jude glared at yn and laughed mockingly. "Isn't seeing my fiancée flirting with another guy enough of a reason to be upset?" yn was speechless, her eyes fixed on the car window. jude started the vehicle.
the girl's eyes were watering. never in six years of relationship had she seen jude say such an atrocity. "why the hell, do you think i was flirting with him?" yn asked. "you were there, all happy, talking to him, all smiles." bellingham's complaint was nonsensical. "he helped me get what i needed and i couldn't reach it. do i have to be rude to people who help me?" yn crossed her arms and the way she spoke showed how incredulous she was. "you're so nice to everyone." jude commented. "and since when has that been a problem for you?" jude didn't answer, he just laughed mockingly.
yn was sad, really sad. it felt like her heart had been pierced. she cried in the passenger seat. when they arrived at the bellingham's house where they were staying, she ran out of the car, slammed the door and thanked the heavens that she hadn't run into anyone when she ran through the entrance of the house. the girl soon locked herself in the bathroom in the room where she had been sleeping for that week.
jude thought he was right without even knowing what had happened there. he grabbed the groceries from the car, went home and found his brother and mother in the kitchen. "where's yn?" was the first thing her brother asked. "probably packing to go back to her house." jude said as he sat down on a stool. "what?" His mother screamed in fright. "she was flirting with a guy at the market." jude commented. "what do you mean, jude?" his mother stopped everything she was doing when she heard this. "she was being so cute with him." He said "jude, did you see? did you hear what they were saying?" jude shook his head. "did you talk to her? what did she say?" his mother asked. "she said she was being polite to him because he had helped her." jude replied "and why didn't you believe that?" his mother and brother looked at him in complete shock.
jude didn't know how to answer. he really didn't know. it seemed like something inside him just wanted to fight. jude isn't like that, they don't fight like that, they don't feel jealous like that.
jude realized what he had done and ran to the room. apparently yn didn't pack her bags. he saw the bathroom door closed and immediately assumed she was there. "yn? please open the door." he knocked on the door and got no answer. "yn, please, i'm sorry, let's talk." he leaned his head against the door. "i'm going to talk to your family and i'm leaving." she said in a choked voice. "are you crazy? It's snowing outside." jude replied "just come out so we can talk." he said "you don't trust me anymore. what do you want to hear?"
bellingham sat with his back to the door "i trust you, i trust you with my eyes closed. but i don't know yn, i don't know what happened to me today i just felt jealous of you." jude said "i've never felt jealous like that, i felt it very close to you." he continued "but i would never, under any circumstances, flirt with another man. you didn't want to believe what i told you, you didn't want to listen to me." yn said "i know baby girl, i know." jude was as sad as yn now "something evil whispered in my ear." yn laughed for the first time through her tears. "i love you yn, please forgive me." yn opened the door slowly and saw the groom sitting on the floor.
she sat down next to him and bellingham held her hand. "if you do that again, i'll leave you forever." yn joked. "you hurt me. seeing you suspicious of me almost made me walk away in the snow on christmas eve." yn admitted. "i wasn't going to let you walk through that door." jude kissed her on the forehead. "the way you were, you would still make fun of me leaving."
"do you forgive me?" he asked "yes, i forgive you." yn gave him a peck on the lips "my mom and jobe will be happy about that." yn laughed "you already told them?"
#football imagine#football one shot#football x reader#football blurb#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham one shot#jude bellingham imagines#jude bellingham fluff#christmas prompts
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Sweet as Cherry
Summary: You reject yourself to be with Rafe and when he finds out about this, he was ready to make your life hell Until you get a date
Warnings: for over 18s, verbal violence, physical violence, psychological violence, Toxic and aggressive relationship
Author's Notes: This story is a little heavy and if you don't like it, don't read it
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It all started on a normal Thursday afternoon, you were at college waiting for the next class to start. It turns out that there was only you in the room, you were like the nerd in the room, so you were always the one He arrived earlier. but incredibly Rafe Cameron was there too And it didn't take long for him to talk to you
"Hello... you and Y/n?" Rafe says smiling at you
You were surprised by Rafe's greeting, he was the popular one in college and a bad boy, obviously you didn't like these types of things or these types of Boys
"Oh hi...I'm Y/n" you say with a friendly smile at Rafe
And he smiles with his smile
"Aren't you going to ask who I am, doll?" Rafe speaks with a disgusting smile
You laugh at this comment causing Rafe to hiss in confusion
"For God's sake, who doesn't know who Rafe Cameron is?" You say smiling and that also makes Rafe laugh a little.
"okay... so I'm famous to you?" Rafe speaks, sitting on a chair that was next to them.
"and...like that. But it doesn't fit that much!" You say in a joking tone.
In reality, you didn't even know why you were being so attentive to Rafe, you knew what he was like and how he treated people. Maybe he was just trying to be nice to you to just copy the homework he didn't do.
When Rafe was about to say something else, the teacher and some other students arrived at the time, interrupting them.
It was obvious that Rafe was frustrated, he was winning you over, he was feeling it. Rafe had his eye on you for a long time, but never tried anything, so he decided this was the time
You sat at a table you always sat at, but this time Rafe was your tablemate and you didn't understand because he always sat in the back, far away from you.
"ae! Y/n! How about you meet me at my house at 5pm? I have a surprise for you" Rafe says in a whisper because of the teacher
"Sorry Rafe...but I'm going to study today" you say giving him a friendly smile, you weren't lying you were really going to study
"Ah, come on? This is a chance for us to meet, don't you think?" Rafe speaks with a hopeful look
"how about another day, hun?" You speak last, turning your attention back to the books
And Rafe couldn't deny that he was very upset and sad about it, you were the first girl to not accept an invitation from him. But he wasn't going to give up
Fourdayslater
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After two days, Rafe couldn't stop and think about you. He was always stalking you on Instagram or any social network, He was always going to the coffee shop you worked at.
You were at work on another normal day and Rafe ended up showing up there, you thought he had just stopped by to say "hi" but Rafe's intentions weren't like that.
"Hi Rafe! What are you doing here?" You ask, giving a friendly smile from behind a counter.
"Ah...I came to see you.” Rafe says giving you his best smile and it ends up leaving you embarrassed
"Well... I won't be able to pay attention to you now because I'm working..." You say, your cheeks turning red.
"what's your problem with y/n? Always avoiding me, always making an excuse..." Rafe speaks frustratedly to you and that makes you angry
"I'm sorry if I'm too busy a girl for you!" You shout, but then restrain yourself because you are at your workplace
"okay... and so?" Rafe says it like you and he were having a lovers' fight
"Rafe...What do you want from me, hun? I would do anything for you to leave me alone now!"
You talk already stressed to him
"A date!" Rafe says simply
"a date?" You repeat and he nods
"Yes! Me and you in a restaurant, what do you think?"
Rafe speaks, approaching you and increasing a smile on your face.
"no, I don't want to go on a date with you, Rafe"
you say, lowering your head, you've never turned down a date. But going out with Rafe was too much for you, you didn't want to be another prize in the His
When you refused Rafe's invitation his physiology simply fell, Rafe's eyes quickly darkened, he was starting to break out in a cold sweat
"what? Are you saying you won't go out with me?" Rafe speaks sounding like a robot that was about to attack you and you were scared there
"and that's right Rafe, I don't want to go out with you now or ever, okay?" You speak harshly, ready to serve the next customers, leaving Rafe alone and angry.
Fourdayslater
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After you didn't want to go out with Rafe, he decided to make your life hell. When you woke up he was there somewhere watching you and you knew it, he was making fun of you From you somewhere in college, he kept treating you like a slave when he went to his work place. But the worst part is when he followed you on the street or when he sent you gifts and love letters or Threatening
You were already tired and fed up with everything Rafe was doing to you, but the worst was going to happen on Wednesday night.
You were in your apartment with the doors locked and the windows too. Everything was calm, so you went to the bathroom to take a shower, going there you ended up taking off your clothes and getting into the hot, bubbly bathtub.
You lay down in the bathtub and closed your eyes, resting. But out of nowhere you end up hearing a voice behind you
"so beautiful...it's a shame it's not mine" Rafe says standing in the doorway smiling, this makes you get up quickly showing off your naked body
When you realize it, you immediately grab a towel that was close to you.
"What are you doing here Rafe?! Can you leave me alone!" you say, screaming desperately, covering yourself with the towel
"no, honey, don't cover yourself, I was seeing a beautiful view" Rafa says walking slowly towards you
"Rafe...please...leave me alone...please" you said with tears in your eyes and slowly moving away with each step Rafe took
"Leave you alone? Why would I leave the most beautiful girl alone?" Rafe speaks with his threatening voice and dark eyes
Now, finally you and Rafe were face to face. Looking deeply, Rafe looked at you like a predator, but you only knew how to be afraid
"...what do you want from me?" You speak with the tears slowly coming down
"I just want a date, my doll" Rafe says almost in a whisper, running his hands over your red face
"Okay, okay. And I'll go out with you, okay?" You say accepting almost desperately
"Do you understand? It's so easy to accept being my girlfriend" Rafe says, smiling like he's crazy and holding your face
"What? Rafe...and just a date, I'm not your girlfriend." You say amazed and Rafe shakes his head no
"Yes, you and my girlfriend yes, and then you will be my wife" Rafe says smiling but squeezing your face, Making you have tears in your eyes even more
"You don't want to make me angry, right? You know what I do when I'm angry." Rafe speaks clearly threatening you
Soon after, he kisses you desperately and madly, the kiss had fear, passion, love, aggression, all emotions flowed from that kiss. Now you were definitely Rafe's
#dark rafe cameron#drew starkey#drew starkey smut#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron headcanons#rafe cameron oneshot#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe smut#rafecore#rafe imagine#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron moodboard#rafe cameron obx#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron thoughts#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe fic#rafe x reader#rafe x you
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Naked | j.jk
-> pairing. wolf shifter!jungkook x human!reader (f)
-> genre. slow burn, eventual romance, fluff, pining, f2l (friends-to-lovers), eventual smut, humor, angst, drama
-> w/c. 1729
-> rating. 13+
-> a/n. Thank you all so much for the love for this couple, y’all have motivated me a lot and I can’t put into words how much I appreciate it <33
-> warnings. suggestive; a lil’ ✨angsty✨
-> collection. mini-series
-> started. Jun. 30th, 2022 @ 18:25
-> fin. Mon., Jul. 30th, 2022 @ 23:27
-> edited. Thurs., Oct. 9th, 2023 @ 12:33
-> divider credit. @mmadeinheavenn
Finding out that your best friend turns into a glorified dog isn’t something you had on your bingo card this year.
You were staying over at Jungkook’s house to finish a History project worth 25% of your final grade, but you ended up falling asleep halfway through. (Oops!)
When you woke up, it wasn’t to the annoyingly smug expression of one incredibly chuffed Jeon Jungkook, but to the silky smooth fur and wet-nosed touch of a fully grown wolf.
You screamed like a shower victim in an 80s horror movie and fell off the bed with a painful thud, the wolf peeking over the edge of the bed with a strangely concerned yip. You screamed again and pushed yourself to your feet, booking it downstairs two at a time (a maneuver that would’ve cost you your life any other day) before slamming into Jisoo halfway through the living room. You held onto her arms with wide, frightened eyes.
You were on the verge of tears, panicking to Jisoo about how “there’s a fucking wolf in Jungkook’s bedroom and oh god I think it ate him oh my god,” when Jungkook barreled down the stairs while pulling a crinkled black tee over his stomach.
Jisoo glared at the maknae, looking pointedly at you (Lisa had taken hold of your shoulders and tried helping you through breathing exercises) and then back at him, her hands on her hips. “What happened?”
Jungkook looked between the two of you, a particularly pained look crossing his face at your glossy eyes and heaving shoulders. “I’m— I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” he mumbles.
“You couldn’t just fall asleep normally?” Jisoo snapped exasperatedly, ignoring your confused back-and-forth looks.
“He wouldn’t stop whining and making a fuss and I didn’t think she’d wake up so soon!” Jungkook yelled desperately, looking nearly as upset as you felt.
“Wait, wait, wait. You guys are—where’s the wolf?” you asked incredulously, wiping furiously at your eyes as you strode forward to stand next to Jisoo.
“He’s—he’s not out anymore… And he wouldn’t dream of hurting you,” Jungkook said, stepping toward you with his arms open. You took a panicked step back, confused and scared and so, so lost.
“Are you telling me… Are you a werewolf?”
“Shifter,” Yoongi corrected from where he was lounging on the couch (you hadn’t noticed him in your panic). “Why do you humans always assume we’re werewolves?”
“You shapeshift into a wolf. That makes you a werewolf,” you sassed, quickly backing away at his intense, annoyed glare.
Jisoo sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, muttering something under her breath before turning an accusatory glare on Jungkook. “Take your friend upstairs and explain to her what’s going on. I’ll talk to Namjoon.”
Jungkook nodded obediently, a solemn look on his face as he reached for your wrist so he could tug you upstairs, wincing back when you flinched away from his touch.
He clenched and unclenched his fingers before dropping his hand to his side, beckoning you to follow him. “C’mon. We should talk.”
You sit with Jungkook on his bed, waiting for him to look up from his lap so he can finally explain to you what the fuck is going on.
You bite the inside of your cheek, eyes drifting to his hands. He’s picking at his nails, refusing to meet your eyes. As confused and shocked as you are, you can’t let him get in his head. His crestfallen face does dirty-dirty things to your heart, banging it up for making him look so sad.
You take a deep breath and reach to hold his hands in yours. Jungkook meets your eyes, his lip wobbling at the soft, patient look in your eyes. You squeeze his hand encouragingly, smiling at the way his eyes light up hopefully at your acceptance.
He inhales shakily and closes his eyes. “Me and my family are shifters. We have full control over when we shift, and we share a close connection with our wolves. Our souls are connected to help with the transitions between wolf and human, a thoughtful gift from our ancestors.
“I moved to Seoul when I was fifteen to try and find my own pack, and I met Jiminie hyung on the train ride over from Busan. We met Yoongi hyung at the bus stop outside of the train station and he offered to help us find the hostel we booked. Somewhere along the journey he must’ve taken a liking to us, because we were moving into the pack house the next day.”
Jungkook laughed fondly at the recollection, the tenseness in his shoulders gone as he spoke to you normally. “We’ve been training ever since to get better at controlling when we shift. Among…other things.” He blushes.
“I didn’t mean to scare you today,” he whispers.
You bite the inside of your cheek. A shifter. That was his explanation for…everything. The affection, the borderline-obsession with your scent, why he’s staying with a bunch of strangers instead of his parents.
Surprisingly, believing him isn’t the hardest part about the new information. “You guys… aren’t dangerous?”
“No,” Jungkook denies firmly, his thumb running over the back of your hand.
“Is that why you’re so touchy? Because of the…wolfier part of you?”
Jungkook scrunches his nose at your choice of words, but smiles softly. “Yeah. Physical closeness is normal and integral to shifter relationships,” he explains. “We have this thing called scenting, which is basically a more…concentrated way of showing affection. It’s also a way to kind of…claim you, I guess. To show you’re part of the pack.”
“But isn’t scenting a thing only mated wolves do?” you ask, frowning at the implications that would have on your relationship.
Jungkook shakes his head. “No, scenting can be romantic or plutonic. It’s dependent on where you scent,” he explains. “Couples usually do what we call ‘marking’, but I’ve heard about people who mark platonically.”
“Marking…as in?” You shift curiously. Shifter culture and biology is going to be something you ask a lot about, you think.
Jungkook blushes, avoiding your eyes as he clears his throat. Finally, he says, “Biting.”
“Biti—Jungkook,” you say, “you bit me a few days ago—“
He must hear the accusation in your voice because he frantically shakes his head. “No, no, no! That was play, I swear. Marking is much more… intimate.” Jungkook’s ears turn pink at the suspicious look you give him.
There’s a long beat of silence where you just kind of…stare at each other.
Jungkook can’t read you. He can’t help the tremble in his voice and the wobbling of his lower lip, looking at your intertwined hands. “You think it’s scary and unnatural, don’t you?”
“Jungkook…”
He smiles sadly. “It’s okay, I get it. We don’t have to be friends any—“
“Yah,” you furrow your brows with a squeeze of his hands, making him look at you. “I still wanna be your friend, Koo. This actually… explains a lot. It’s just a lot to take in,” you confess.
He still looks unsure of himself. And because you can’t stand seeing him sad, you shift toward him and bring your arms around his torso in a hug. He sniffles, burying his nose into your shoulder as his hands drift to the center of your back, clutching the fabric between his fingers.
It’s peaceful in his arms. Quiet. The only sound in the room is that of your combined breathing. Maybe he can even hear your heartbeat? You bite the inside of your cheek, patting his back gently. You wonder how it all works? They must shift pretty quickly, considering Jungkook had been downstairs only a minute or two after you. And he was pulling a shirt on when he was coming down the stairs…
“I don’t mean to be insensitive,” you pull away to look at him properly, “but what happens to your clothes when you transform? Do you like… do you get” —you gesture around vaguely, whispering— “naked before it starts?”
Jungkook snorts, his eyes glossy and cheeks pink. But, hey! At least he’s smiling!
He grins boyishly and shakes his head. “Way to ruin the moment,” he teases. “But uh, yeah. Our clothes rip when we shift, so we try to undress beforehand.”
“You’ve seen each other naked?“ you ask incredulously, eyes wide. Jungkook blushes pink at your reaction, nodding while sheepishly scratching the back of his head. “Even… the girls?”
He whines, hiding his face in his hands. You gape at his pink ears, malfunctioning for a second. Jungkook’s seen boobs and ass. And probably more than that, too. You rub at your neck to distract yourself from the blush you feel crawling up your throat.
“It’s normal!” Jungkook defends himself, still blushing furiously as he waves his hands around wildly, pouting. “You’re making it weird…”
“I” —you gape at him— “what? You’re the one who’s seen your friends’ jun-mfh—“ you laugh into Jungkook’s hand as he smacks it over your mouth, yelling at you to shut up before they hear!
You laugh breathlessly and tell him that you’ll be quiet, reassuring him three, four, five times before he finally lets you go.
He sits back on his knees with his feet folded underneath him. “Let’s forget this conversation ever happened,” Jungkook says, shivering exaggeratedly to make his point.
You giggle and shake your head as your smile slips. You stare at him until he meets your eyes, and smile softly when he does. “Thank you for telling me.”
He nods, smiling down at his hands. The two of you stay like that for what feels like hours, basking in each others’ presence and getting familiar with this newly shared secret.
“Can I…” Jungkook nibbles his lip, hope shining behind his eyes. “Can I scent you?”
You snort, pushing his face away with a lighthearted smile. “Never in a million years, Jeon.”
“Bunny,” he whines childishly, righting himself into a sitting position after almost toppling off the edge of his bed before clasping his hands in front of him. “Please? I promise it’ll feel good!”
“Stop!”
“Yah, you’re the one making it sound weird!”
“Fine! I guess I’ll go tell your hyungs and noonas about how dirty their precious maknae i—“
“DON’T YOU DARE!”
<- prev | next ->
#bts x you#bts x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook x you#jeon jungkook x reader#bts a/b/o#a/b/o fanfic#a/b/o fic#a/b/o au#werewolf bts#bts werewolf au#werewolf au#bts shifter au#shifter au#bts hybrid au#hybrid au#bts fluff#bts smut#jungkook fluff#jungkook smut#ao3#archive of our own#bts fic#bts fanfiction#fic: sharp teeth#werewolf jungkook#shifter jungkook#hybrid jungkook
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Considering my love language is physical touch and all I want after a long day is a hug this literally makes my heart just like melt!! Thank you for this request and I hope you enjoy!!
─⊰⊹ฺ❄️𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⊹ฺ❄️
{༻~A hug a day~༺}
CW: GN! Reader! Mentions of the character being down in the dumps/sad, reader has a kind of sunshine personality and of course fluffy!!
Pet names used on reader: Mon amour, My dear, honey, my sweet
(Includes: Lyney, Diluc, Kaveh, Alhaitham and Neuvillette!)
𑁍༄Lyney:
Lyney rested his head on his arm, slowly turning his hat by the brim as it sat on the table in front of him...to say he'd had a bad day was a understatement. Out of all the things a magician could have happen to them during a performance, having their trick explained by a crowd member who then got everyone else riled up...was probably one of the worst. He could still hear the boos...and feel the embarrassment flow through his veins as things were thrown at him on stage.
"Oh what a day..." He sighed and you could hear his sadness in it, that was the last straw...you couldn't just leave him upset. You wrapped your arms around him from behind, hugging him tightly, "Those people are just mean, your shows are amazing and just because they called out one trick doesn't matter cause you will just come back stronger. I know you Lyney... don't let that one low life make you feel down...you're ten times more incredible then they will ever be."
You felt him tense at your touch, but quickly he melted into it and you could see his smile returning already, "Ah Mon amour, you're right. How can I feel sad when I have you, I'm luckier than any guy in the world. Thank you for reminding me."
𑁍༄Diluc:
Diluc swirled the grape juice in his cup, wishing he could simply forget the things he'd learned today. Gathering intel was normally easy for him, he'd use it to protect Mondstat...the ones he loved, but learning the dangers, what he was truly up against...it made him worry. How could he protect everyone against something so treacherous... "Can I really do it all alone?"
"Alone? You're not alone."
He sat up straighter, not expecting a answer...not expecting you to be walking towards him, how you always managed to know when he was in need of you was a mystery to him.. "When did you get back?" You smiled at him and wrapped your arms tight around his chest, "Just a second ago, I had a feeling something was wrong and that you needed a hug. Was I right?"
"More then you could know, thank you. My dear."
𑁍༄Kaveh:
Kaveh tossed his sketchbook onto the table, his pencil snapping between his fingers as his free hand ran through his blonde hair. Normally he'd just take a step back, cool off before returning to his happy self but the whole day had just been... well not great and not being able to sketch was the nail in the coffin. "I swear if one more thing goes wrong I- huh?"
He looked down at you as you embraced him tightly, your face snuggling into his chest, "It's okay Kaveh, we all have those kinds of days but I'm here and I'll make it a good day. How about I make some snacks, we can look at old photos and cuddle up on the couch."
Whatever he was feeling before you touched him...it was gone, just one hug and he felt better, he was almost convinced at this point you had some type of magic, "I would love that...thank you honey. Sorry you had to see my little freak out...aha not my proudest moment..."
"Everyone has them Kaveh, it's okay."
"Ah...what would I do without you?"
𑁍༄Alhaitham:
Alhaitham knew he didn't handle things like everyone else did, when others had bad days they'd get upset and stressed, take time to themselves...even cry, but he was far better at hiding how he felt. He'd stay in his study...reading for hours until whatever had made his day hard was but a small needle in a haystack of information...or at least that's what he used to do.
Now he had you and you weren't one to let him lock himself away, you would hold him tight even when he'd never usually accept hugs and for some reason...he enjoyed them. Having you so close, feeling your heart beat against his chest, instead of being alone for hours and reading till even he got a headache...it merely took a few minutes with you.
"Better?"
"Better."
𑁍༄Nuevillette:
Rain was batting against the windows, water pouring down the glass outside...and it had been going on for over a hour now. He'd have to apologize to everyone at some point, normally cases wouldn't bother the chief of justice, he'd been doing his job so long nothing really got to him...but the last one, what gruesome case it was and it had ended in such a horrible way...none of it even necessary.
"Neuvillette...you've been staring out the window for a long time. Are you alright?" You looked at him slightly worried, your instincts kicking in as you hugged his side...he wasn't really allowed to share the details of alot of his work, but you could always tell when the clouds appeared that one had gotten to him.
He looked at you for a moment and placed a kiss on your forehead, feeling his burden of information slowly grow lighter as your touch lingered, "Yes im alright my sweet, just...keep close to me for a second longer and the storm will clear."
ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚~Have a nice day!~*.✧
#genshin impact#genshin headcanons#genshin#genshin fanfic#genshin x reader#genshin x you#lyney x reader#lyney x you#lyney fluff#lyney headcanons#diluc headcanons#diluc x you#diluc x reader#diluc fluff
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The Weirdest Fucking Movies I've Ever seen Pt. 1
Okay so I sort of champion myself as a lover of weird movies. And it's funny because regardless of how many I've seen, every time I watch a weird movie I genuinely feel as if it is the weirdest movie I've ever seen in my life.
So, I decided to make a list which compiles all of said weird movies and then a description of why I find each so uniquely weird. If you find any of these descriptions or titles intriguing, I recommend you seek these movies out, because a weird movie = a good life ya know so yeah
If you have more weird movies please please recommend them im hungry for new crazy cinema bebesssss
Eraserhead (1977) - genuinely makes no sense.
Coherence (2013) - trippy scientifically interesting thriller
Some Velvet Morning (2013) - abusive cat n mouse relationship
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) - emotional violence
Greener Grass (2019) - let's shame suburbia!
Trash Humpers (2009) - people fucking the trash...?
Julien Donkey-Boy (1999) - mental illness be so sad and trippy
Gummo (1997) - literal photo album of a dysfunctional town
Slaughtered Vomit Dolls (2006) - bulimia PSA in disguise
Black Bear (2020) - art seeps into the "real" world
Begotten (1990) - god kills himself
Trouble Every Day (2001) - eating people presented as...a turn on?
Baise-Moi (2000) - punk feminist murderous women are sick and society sux
Palindromes (2004) - one character is played by a ton of different actors of different ages, races, and sexes
964 Pinocchio (1991) - so much vomit, even more cyberpunk lobotomy sex machine madness
Meet the Feebles (1989) - the muppets give each other STDs and commit mass murder
In the Realm of the Senses (1976) - a torrid, pornographic affair used to escape the horrors of a war-torn world
Enter the Void (2009) - going to the past, present, and future, POV shots that include blinking, going inside the body, taboo themes with a psychedelic style
Love (2015) - horny pseudo-porno about a misogynistic asshole who somehow pulls hot, sexually adventurous women
Climax (2018) - LSD fueled nightmare
Pink Flamingos (1972) - a competition to be the "filthiest person alive" (spoiler alert: the cool drag queen wins)
Vivarium (2019) - Suburbia is still creepy, guys
Be My Cat: A Film for Anne (2015) - can we please stop having erotomania like celebrities aren't into u babe :(
No No Nooky TV (1987) - Computers being cool and saying "boobs" and "clit"
The Piano Teacher (2001) - unsafe nonconsensual bdsm and sexual repression is...no. please no.
The Night Porter (1974) - stockholm syndrome and wild bdsm stuff with postwar themes
Belle de Jour (1967) - more bdsm themes
Titane (2021) - woman fucks a car and gets pregnant
Daisies (1966) - two girls cut up pickles and destroy the patriarchy
Creep 1 and 2 (2014, 2017) - murder has never been this funny
Garbanzo Gas (2007) - a human cow gets an all-expenses paid trip to a motel before it hits the slaughterhouse
Melancholie der Engel (2009) - ew.
In Our Garden (2002) - old men dicks + weirdest dialogue I've ever heard in my life
The Rehearsal (TV series) (2022) - this is the ultimate weirdest thing ever and I don't know how else to categorize it.
Trigger Warnings (all of these movies are weird/fucked up but some of them contain actual fucked up stuff that like. happened in real life. so below are the triggers for that kind of stuff. All of these films are genuine films, not the gore stuff the internet produces, but some of them because of the country/time period/transgressiveness include content that is inappropriate and/or ethically unacceptable, so I've included those movies below)
Baise-Moi - unsimulated sex scenes which includes SA scenes that actors consented to but characters did not. this proves a feminist point but is still incredibly upsetting and stayed with me for a while as there are close ups and its awful.
In the Realm of the Senses - Please look into this one more before you watch it, I'm not going to describe things in detail because it makes me so uncomfortable but there are some scenes that involve young actors that should not ethically have been in the situations they were put in. The movie is exceptionally well made and from what I know globally respected so I don't know why they had to ruin it for me but whatever.
Pink Flamingos - One infamous scene involves an actual chicken death. It was the early 70s (long time ago and no PETA) and they apparently ate the chicken afterward, so I felt less immoral about this one but still gross.
Melancholie der Engel - okay please genuinely never watch this movie unless you're super into traumatizing yourself and are very desensitized I guess. There's a ton of actual animal abuse in very very graphic/unnecessarily disturbing shock type situations. There's other bad unsimulated stuff but this is the worst of it from what I know.
Love and Meet the Feebles contain scenes that are transphobic and/or racist, which is gross. Slaughtered Vomit Dolls was made by a very bad person. A bunch of the movies also have unsimulated sex stuff, I don't know if that makes anyone uncomfortable but if it does I'm just putting it out there.
#weird movies#disturbing movies#obscure movies#movie#cult movies#vintage movies#film#classic film#cinema#surreal#surrealism#art house#experimental#harmony korine#gaspar noe#extreme#riot grrrl#punk rock
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⚪️ More Spot x Reader (prompts) 🖤
Because it’s not my duty with 15 whole followers to write more🙏🙏 ily all. This is pretty long since I did prompts I found and stuff so :3.. ALSOOALSO, I’m new at writing x reader and the love means sm!!! AGG!!
:readmore:
Who confessed first? what was the confession like?
Spot is an enigma, a man beyond his mortal realm. A man who has the power to travel anywhere he pleases…. But he could never tell you how he feels. He’d feel like, in the event of a heartfelt confession, you’d be terrified and run away. After all, it’s not everyday an inter dimensional being wants you to be theirs.
In the event of a confession, he would expect you to do most of the talking. It’s not something he’s proud of, but his emotions, to him, don’t matter anymore because of what he is. The confession, if he would imagine it, would be something incredibly cheesy but something so.. him. He didn’t have flowers because the kind you liked were out, didn’t have any romantic place to go to because he was afraid of being shunned, and the cupcakes he made burnt :(!
If he could, he’d cry upon a confession on your end.
Who gets sick/injured more often? who is the caretaker?
This goes without saying, but spot is.. not human, or at least he isn’t anymore. He can’t catch a cold, or get sick, it’s beyond him now. So, you would have to undoubtedly be the one he winds up taking care of.
He seems like a worrywart. In the event you are sick, or Ill, or whatever it may be, he’s going to act like you’re dying. He won’t leave your side for one minute, constantly trying to cook for you or *cough* steal *cough* medicine (it’s a little difficult with his holes.. please be patient).
How do they feel about PDA?
Oh my god.. please. He craves it. So much. It’s unhealthy. Even if he isn’t.. the most easy to hold or cuddle, he wants nothing more than to feel your warmpth against him. You’re the last, if not only thing he has to affection.
He can’t kiss you, or really.. do anything.. but he has hands! And a body! So he’d love it if you would spoil him with endearment.
In public, things are slightly different. He hardly goes out unless it’s to continue his ‘life of crime’, but if you were to tag along and show him affection, in public.. he wouldn’t know how to react. Like, you’re proud to be with him??? Him?? HIM??
How do they comfort you/cheer you up?
Oh how he just hates to see his love sad :(. You give him so much love and affection.. the least he could do is return it tenfold when you feel upset.
He’ll hold you, tell you sweet things, try and lull you. Your emotions, to him, are as important as breathing (if he.. even needs to do that).
Maybe will even cook for you! He has a thing for spicy food. Can he like, even eat?
Traits they like in a partner?
He wants someone who is like him in the sence that also feel somewhat outcasted from society. Someone who isn’t conveniently attractive, has features that aren’t considerably desirable. He loves those things. Hooked noses, droopy eyes, eyebags, stretch marks, pimples, he loves it all. He’s not a picky man.
Might perfer chubby partners (would appriciate the comfort of holding them, not to mention he thinks curvy women are attractive.. he’s such a dork).
Spot would like a significant other thats artistic or creative. They might seem more open to his ideas, or at least to him that’s how it would seem. One with a sence of humor aswell.
(Maybe a significant other who can defend him if he’s being attacked for robbing some place)
Traits they don’t like in a partner?
I.. really don’t think there’s much he wouldn’t like in a partner. He likes anyone and everyone as long as they love him and they’re nice to him. That said.. he probably couldn’t stand someone who’s rude, or cocky to an extent. Someone who’s on their phone while he’s trying to talk to them. Someone who actively turns down his love. He’s a very clingy man, he wants the affection and if you can’t give it it’ll upset him.
Do they buy you gifts often? What would they buy you?
He loves to (steal) buy things for his darling. Little trinkets, or other things he thinks they would enjoy based on his knowledge of them. He loves how their face brightens, how he knows he just made their day. He can’t do much for you, but he makes it up with anything he can do. He wants you to feel like a goddess.
#marvel#marvel x reader#the spot x reader#the spot#writing#x reader#idk what to tag this as#help help help#this is a cry for help#someone help#fun facts#f/o imagines#f/o tag#spiderman#spider man#amazing spider man#across the spiderverse#spider man: across the spider verse#spider punk#Spotify
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May i ask why do you think that Brambleclaw wasn't a good father? not saying i disagree if that is what you think, but why do you? just wondering because i like what you say
Again I hope to have time sometime soon to make a big thing like I did with Breeze, but what gets me about Bramble is that incredibly self-concerned. Like, regularly unable to see past his own feelings to the point where he can't consider his effect on other people.
And Po3 in particular is ALSO trying to frame him like the perfect, most amazing dad in the world. It's for the dramatic irony of the reveal, and to make it EXTRA sad that he's going to abandon his children when he finds out they're adopted... but in the process, they just ignore anything crummy he does. Like he can Do No Wrong.
Particular instances I plan to get into;
When he's angry or disappointed, he's NASTY. He isn't this "super supportive papa" that the Three keep saying he is; he's most supportive when they're making him proud.
He fails to notice that Lionpaw's behavior is getting increasingly violent as a result of his mentor physically abusing him. Is that "Great Dad" material? To not notice your son is struggling?
We eventually learn that Ashfur approached him after one of these savage beatings to butter up to Brambleclaw, insisting that this sort of physical abuse is neccesary because it will give him a strong son.
Stress that again; Ashfur appealed to Brambleclaw's ego so he could keep beating his teenage child. In what world is that "Great Dad" material??
When Hollypaw then tries to tell her dad about how uncomfortable seeing her brother being savaged made her, Bramble tells her... ohh she's So smart, and So so responsible, and he relies on her to keep her brothers in line, and what Ashfur is doing is neccesary.
In any other book series, this would have been a MASSIVE condemnation of Brambleclaw. To be manipulated into allowing his son to get beat, and then turning around to tell his daughter he trusts her to understand it because she's so mature.
But because the Erins like Bramble so very much, it's not acknowledged. Then Ashfur tries to murder these kids later.
And like... again, they want him to be seen as so wonderful and amazing so that it's extra painful when he disowns these kids, but AGAIN, Brambleclaw is supposed to be this incredibly loving, unconditionally loyal, amazingly responsible father...
So how exactly is THAT consistent with abandoning his kids during the most upsetting time of their lives?
Does a wonderful father get consumed by his own pain and humiliation and cut off his kids, one of whom is in the middle of a breakdown? Does he take out his divorce on the children? Is being a "wonderful father" seeing the son you let get abused looking at you, DESPERATELY missing you as his dad, and just turning away?
Or, maybe, being a parent is about being mature. Putting aside your own personal anger or pain or ego to be there for your kids. Something like that???
And yet, he continues to act like that for an entire year. Not improving or self-reflecting at ALL the entire time. When it's miraculously revealed that Hollyleaf isn't DEAD, he's STILL wallowing. The kid he raised came back from the dead but FUCK that, who cares, "what about MY feelings?? Why is no one thinking about whats really important. Meeee."
(Mind you, he was willing to help this same person get away with murder in the last arc. But back then, she was his daughter. Now he doesn't care.)
Eventually SQUIRRELFLIGHT has to tell him that he shouldn't throw away his entire family because he's mad at her. Someone ELSE had to shout it down his thick skull that his bitterness is consuming him and he's ruining his life. Even after a year of punishment, she holds his hand like a big baby and guides him away from his OWN destructive behaviors.
But this isn't about Squilf. This is about Brambleclaw.
He enabled his son's child abuse. The abuser went on to attempt murder of his victim. He IMMEDIATELY turned on the kids he raised when he found out they were secretly adopted, because he was angry at his ex-wife. He only changed because the EX-WIFE told him to cut it out.
That's why I think he's not a great dad. I think talk of his Greatly Dadness are narration wank, and when you look closer, you see a FASCINATINGLY flawed character that the Erins hold back out of WEIRD writer favoritism.
#Warrior cats analysis#And again this is FASCINATING#I want to dissect him#He is my eternal rival. My white whale#My detested comrade with whom I am dying in the trenches#I wake up from cryosleep 100000 years in the future and the computer simulation picks the one man i hate the most in the world#Because through my seething fixation. He is somehow the only one who can keep me sane#As we float through the cold and uncaring vacuum of space.
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Loss
Halsin x gn!Reader
A/N: Based on this request - I hope this helps in some small way, nonny! Losing a pet is incredibly hard and my heart is with you! <3
Word Count: 898
Warnings: Scratch has passed away in this (it is not described just mentioned!), pet death, grieving, slight angst, emotional hurt comfort, established relationship.
The small clearing by the river offers little solace despite it being your typical get away from camp.
The usual calming gurgle of moving water and the gentle breeze does almost nothing to soothe the aching in your heart. The worn red ball in your hand rough against your palm as you squeeze it, dutifully ignoring the churned earth several feet behind you.
You miss Scratch.
You miss the adorable little pup so much your heart aches and tears still threaten to spill despite having already cried so much you thought you’d run yourself dry.
You and your other companions had put him to rest just yesterday, and while you’d all been there for one another at first, you’d all drifted to grieve in your own ways.
You’d been the one to pick his resting place, knowing the playful dog had loved this little place as much as you do. You remember how he’d race after the ball when you threw it, even happily leaping into the river if you threw it there. You remember how he’d come running back over to you, shaking himself off and drenching you in the process, making you laugh as he’d pant happily at you.
The thought makes your throat tighten and tears build up anew, and you almost let out a quiet sob, until the sound of quiet footsteps approach you.
You don’t have to turn to see who it is. Halsin has been your rock through all this, holding you close as you cried or rubbing soothing patterns up and down your back as you recounted memories.
Even now, he settles at your side on the soft grass, his leg pressed against yours as his arm slides around your waist to hold you against him in a warm embrace.
He doesn’t say anything, just holds you in comforting silence as he waits for you to talk if you so wish. You know he’s also perfectly content to just hold you as you work through your grief.
You take a deep shuddering breath. “I miss him so much,” you say softly.
Halsin’s arm tightens around you, head turning to press a kiss to the crown of your head. “I know my heart, we all feel his absence,” he says, voice gentle.
“I just can’t believe he’s gone,” you tell him, voice wobbling. “I woke up this morning and almost forgot. I still looked for him when I left the tent until I remembered…”
A quiet sob leaves you as you turn to hide your face in Halsin’s shoulder. His arms wrap around you fully now, gently adjusting until you’re in his lap, face tucked into the crook of his neck as you cry.
“I hold your grief in my heart,” Halsin says softly, running his hand up and down your back gently. “Death is a part of nature, part of the way life is meant to progress,” he tells you, “but that does not make it any easier.”
His words create a small sense of relief in you. At first you felt foolish for being so upset about Scratch. You have so many other things to worry about, and like Halsin said, death is inevitable. But his affirmation of your grief somehow makes it easier to work through it.
It’s okay to be sad. A thought that hadn’t really crossed your mind until now.
“Just know,” Halsin speaks once more, “that it will hurt for a time. You will wake and feel that grief in your heart and in your soul. But in time it will fade, even though the memories still remain.”
You nod against him, arms tightening around him as he continues to hold you.
He’s right. You’ll be sad for a while, but eventually you’ll be able to remember the happy times with the loveable dog without grief clouding the memories.
Even now you find yourself smiling through your tears as a certain memory flashes through you.
You move so you’re not tucked so tightly against Halsin, your cheek instead resting gently on his shoulder as you speak.
“Do you remember when Scratch brought a dead rabbit to Gale’s tent?” You ask, wiping at your tears.
Halsin laughs, eyes crinkling with the action. “I do indeed. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the wizard so incensed.”
You let out a weak laugh of your own. “I know, and even though he was upset, even he couldn’t be mad at the poor thing,” you recall. “I think he even begrudgingly thanked Scratch when he just sat there wagging his tail like he’d done the best thing ever.”
Halsin nodded, smiling. “He was always a thoughtful beast,” he says. “Always bringing little trinkets to everyone.”
“He really was the best dog,” you whisper, settling further into your lover.
“He was. And he will be happily held in our hearts and our memories.”
You sigh as you embrace Halsin again, sitting up to press a quick kiss to his lips before returning to your spot on his shoulder.
“Thank you,” you say softly. “For being here.”
Halsin tuggs you closer. “I wouldn’t be anywhere else, my heart.”
You smile, and as Halsin holds you in his arms, the sounds of nature surrounding you both, you swear you can feel the brush of fur against your side before it drifts away on the breeze.
You know then, that everything will be okay.
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Suyin wasn't "coerced" to commit a crime, neither did she want to take herself out of the situation. She wanted to get her friends out of paying for their crimes because she's spoiled and entitled.
She didn't "have" to travel the world, she was sent to family members to take her away from a criminal and endangering environment, and she decided to escape because she's too much of a pick me girl to stay with the so called family "that didn't show her affection". To be honest, you speak of her as some kind of adult avatar-styled Rapunzel, instead of a teenager who deserved to be reprimanded.
She did turn her life around, and kudos to the creators for showing that. No one can say that her story and background is boring by any chance.
She, however, is not the most likeable character out there to a big part of the fandom, but I seriously doubt someone is taking it as seriously as you seem to do. Just chill.
Istg this happens almost everytime I post something mildly touching on the fact that Suyin deserves compassion too. Though you may be the same anon who blew up my inbox a while back so it might just be you.
I've always found the disdain we have for "troubled teens" upsetting because usually, when a teenager "acts out", there's more of a reason behind it that just "ooh they're spoilt or entitled".
[Trigger warning for self harm and suicidal ideation mentions]
Like, I was a very difficult teen back in the day. I argued with my parents, even got into physical altercations, skipped school, ran away from home at night. I was also going through a severe depression, dealing with a shitton of childhood trauma, cutting on the regular and making multiple attempts on my life. Hell, if my parents had brushed me off as "a kid who needs to be disciplined" I probably would've killed myself at 14. It doesn't excuse me for punching my dad in the stomach when he was just trying to stop me from running away into the night but it doesn't mean I didn't deserve help.
[End of Trigger Warning]
These two things can be correct at the same time. Suyin can have done a shitty thing that deserves reprimand and that she needs help that she seemingly had to find on her own. But like, guess which of these two is almost exclusively focused on.
And I mean, it's totally not like the Avatar fandom has a habit of expressing extreme hate towards young girls (especially young girls of colour) making sub optimal choices or just beind "annoying". I've just never seen that before.
Suyin grew up with Toph, who Lin herself has described like this:
Suyin : No, no. My children are a blessing. Lin: Yeah, mom used to say that too, but she never meant it.
Which btw, still an incredibly hillarious thing to say in front of Suyin's children: "Hi kids I'm your aunt Lin and your mother is lying about loving you"
While Suyin has, as a child, expressed doubt that Toph would even care that she's skipping school. And as an adult, she has described her childhood with Lin as "competing for their mother's affection" and still has doubts whether or not her mother is happy with how either of them turned out.
Hell, even though Su and Toph have been said to have made up, Toph still maintains a heavy layer of distance between them, seemingly dissappearing for years at a time!
It's honestly sad how Suyin hugs Toph and puts up statues of her everywhere in Zaofu and yet Toph still just fucked off to the swamp when Opal was probably less then ten and did not contact them.
I mean, sounds like there's not a lot of motherly affection going on there, dude. Idk what to tell ya. We know there were no fathers around either.
And Lin was also a victim of this environment, so I don't really want this to come off as me blaming her for the way she acted towards Su. But Lin is hardly what I would call affectionate.
So of course Suyin would put so much stock in her relationships outside the house. And her friends happened to be fucking criminals fucking hell. And of course Lin, being a kid too did not know how to approach this situation properly, so she inadvertently just pushed Suyin closer to them by insulting them and making her feel defensive.
Because that's what all fucking teens do. The internalise things, they rely on their peers to form their perception of things and they want to be independent. So when someone, especially someone who isn't a parent tries to control them, guess how they'll react? They dig their heels in. Especially a teen like Suyin who has virtually no reason to listen to her older sister other than a vague "I know better than you" type of vibe which really pisses teens off. That's like the time when talking down to them is the worst thing to do.
And fuck off with saying getting arrested and screamed at by your sister in the middle of the road isn't a stressful situation that you wolud wanna get out of. Lin punched a car so hard it dented! (Especially that Lin has already been confirmed to use her status as a police officer against people she has a vendetta against, like when SHE TRIED TO THROW PEMA IN JAIL FOR STEALING HER MANS like how tf did we brush over that)
What I always find interesting in this scene is the front that Su puts on in front of Lin, which slips up a few times, particularly when Lin can't see her expression. Because Suyin is, of course being a fucking brat and taunting Lin, but you can clearly see that she's stressed out.
Suyin also describing the reason she helped her friends as a getaway driver is something I find interesting:
Suyin: I didn't steal anything. I just drove the car. I owed my friends a favor. It's not a big deal.
Of course she's scared and minimising her involvement but the usage of "owing her friends" could very easily imply her not exactly being too hyped about this, as well as her insistence on not stealing anything.
Because the thing about Suyin is that, especially in the flashbacks, we see her only in Lin's PoV. We don't see her relationship with her friends, what led up to the robbery, anything. Which makes sense, because the flashbacks are supposed to be Lin's. But that means we're viewing Su with the inherent bias of Lin, who clearly has an agenda against Su.
Lin clearly blames Suyin for Toph leaving policework, despite us later seeing how burnt out and cynical Toph was about being a cop. Its more likely that Su's arrest was a wake-up call for Toph, but she left due to the buildup of stress and disillusionment and Lin, who has been idolising her mother and her mother's career blamed it on Suyin in her head.
Hell, even they made up, Lin still immediately pivots to accusing Suyin of being involved in the Red Lotus' attack. Despite the attack placing Suyin's life, the lives of her sons and the lives of her guards at risk and Suyin going out of her way to thwart it.
And Suyin's life is just a fucking mess after this point like: betrayal by close friend, daughter kidnapped by terrorists, anarchy in the kingdom, leaders of 2 foreign governments trying to pressure her into subjugating the people in the name of a monarch she doesn't support, betrayal part 2; child boogaloo, the country she lives in being declared a dictatorship, city under literal siege, threat of attack in 24 hours, the fucking Avatar doing fuck all to help, a desperate attempt at assassinating the leader, getting caught and placed in questionably humane restraints, having to watch her daughter be forced to flee, PUBKIC HUMILIATION, the arrest of her non combative son and husbandd, INHUMANE JAIL CELL...
Do I need to go on? Like the moment the Krew came to her gouse her life just started to fucking fall apart its actually kinda hillarious.
And calling Suyin a "pick me" is just... unfounded? Who's she trying to get picked by? Her mom who doesn't love her? Girlie just wanted a family she literally said so in the show, put your listening ears on, babes.
I understand that Suyin isn't the most likeable character to people. I can understand why they dislike her. She can be annoying, hypocritical, rash, the poor structuring of the episodes around her and Lin makes it so she gets unearned favour from the writers etc. People who like Lin and Kuvira, two extremely popular characters in the fandom have an easy villain in their faves' lives if they just tweak Suyin a bit.
But that doesn't mean I'm obligated to dislike her too or that I'm not allowed to post about her in a way that doesn't allign with the fandom's narrative of her. You're not obligated to read it, hun, you can block the #pro suyin beifong tag if it makes you that upset to see me
I want to appreciate parts of Suyin which aren't highlighted by the fandom and I'm allowed to do that. Just because it doesn't fit with your clearly overtly negative opion of the character well, tough luck. And hey, I gladly take the opportunity to talk about Suyin, but I've also made a ridiculous amount of posts around har and have probably addressed almost every single fandom complaint of her at some point so I'm starting to get a little tired of repeating myself lol.
And I'll be the first to admit, my own teenage years probably heavily affect how compassionate I am towards Suyin, particularly in her younger years. But I know how much people hate "troubled teens", how little compassion thet are given.
The narrative that if a misbehaving teenager just gets deisciplined and reprimanded enough they'll stop being "spoilt and entitled" or acting out is wrong and harmful. It hurts tons of teenagers by not getting them the help they need and it would've fucking killed me.
Also hun, I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I tend to use hyperbole a lot. I'm a dramatic bitch. Like did you also think I was serious when I said I'd shoot myself if I saw another ad for Amazon's shit lotr wannabe show?
Tbh everytime I get an ask like this I vaguely consider doubling down and commiting to the bit of being the fandom's "Lin Beifong hater". Though I feel like a lot of people wouldn't realise its a bit and think I actually hate her for real lol.
#unscripted quill traumadump yay 🥳🥳🥳#avatar fandom when a teenage girl with skin thay is not white as snow does something imperfect: and I took that personally#suyin beifong#pro suyin beifong#lin beifong#toph#toph beifong#anti lin beifong#<joke tag#avatar#legend of korra#tlok#the legend of korra#avatar the legend of korra#atlok#lok
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i think that childhood best friends to lovers with kiri would actually be — an incredibly sad journey LOL
you're perfect in his eyes. quirkless, exactly as you're meant to be, with the potential to do anything. everything. the world is at your feet and he knows you'll go after it — it's him that falls flat, that can't follow in your footsteps. his quirk isn't anything special, nothing manly, and it won't make him a hero like his heroes. instead he's just in this odd, empty space in between. floating.
you accepting him that way — i think it would mean everything to him.
neither of you really know what to expect, when he goes off to ua. of course you're excited for him; even if his hair is new and he seems a little different, you can feel the build of confidence in him, the motivation he has to try, and that means more to you than the distance ever could. of all things, you want kiri to be happy, even if your friendship takes a backseat to bigger, better things.
days turn to weeks turn to months and the calls become less frequent. the first time he comes home in a while — maybe half a year — he brings his new friends and they're...incredible. strong and powerful and full of life, full of excitement, spontaneous and fun. the kind of people that become heroes. the kind of people kiri needs around him.
you don't think he means to be so distant; what little time the two of you get together is the same as it always is. cheesy movies and multi-player RPG's until the late, late hours of the night. pizza and energy drinks and jokes that are still as funny as they were when you were six. he sleeps on the couch instead of your bed now and doesn't sit as close as he used to, doesn't take his shirt off just because anymore — but you don't mind. you try not to. you try not to care about how much he sweats when you stare at him, or how red the back of his neck gets, or how it seems like he can't look you in the eye anymore.
you don't think he means it, and so you can't be angry at him. angry, no, hurt though...that's a little harder. because everything seems the same with him; it's not like he's upset with you or even wanting to leave you behind. he always apologizes for not keeping up, genuinely, looking like a sad little puppy even though you for forgive him, easily. you're not sure what has changed exactly, you're only sure that everything has.
kirishima's able to go pro very quickly, has a spot secured even before he's graduated. by the time he was sixteen, he'd already been in the news a handful of times, celebrated for the incredible hero he's always been capable of being, and the public loves him by the time he's eighteen. while he's out saving lives and making an impact on the entirety of japan, you're studying or trying to find a new date to the summer festival, because you know he won't be able to go. he doesn't make your graduation — and sounds really sorry about it, when he calls a few weeks after — and you get petty enough that you don't go to his either.
it's stupid, and you feel bad, but kirishima doesn't even notice.
a long time goes by, before you see each other again. all the attempts he makes to meet up with you are fruitless; either he can't make it or you don't want to try, too tired and embarrassed after being stood up time and time again. his apologies become redundant, and even if you know he means them, it doesn't make them any easier to hear.
naturally, you see him again at the worst moment: coming out of the gym, sweaty, without makeup and fighting off a painful zit on your chin. he's with his bestie — bakugou, who is even more terrifying at twenty-four than he was at fifteen — and kiri has his hair up in a cute half man-bun and it's longer than you remember and he's bigger than you remember and in a shirt that should hardly count as a shirt.
and he's overjoyed to see you.
"oh my god!" he laughs, smacking a hand to his forehead as you stand awkwardly in the doorway, trying to tuck your face down in the most nonchalant way.
it's the wrong move, because you don't see him step in to hug you.
"kirishima!" you squeal, trying to jerk away as you feel his cheek press against your damp hairline. you feel gross, even worse when you see the face bakugou makes. "quit it!"
"sorry! i just can't believe—" and when he sees the look on your face, the happiness on his drops, replaced by something like humiliation as he glances between you and his friend.
there's something terrible about the slow end of a friendship, and you can see it manifest in his expression. how much of a stranger the two of you have become over time, due to neglect, and it seems like all the ugly feelings are soaked up by him like a sponge.
you don't even know what to say. you don't even know if there's anything to say—no, no, that's not true; there are a million and one things to say, but you just don't know where to begin.
#kirishima drabble#this has been in my drafts for literally so long LOL#he doesn't even realize 🥺 he's just been so busy 🥺#in his mind he's getting better for you#becoming the kind of man that you deserve#and in your mind he's left you far far behind 🥺#woof can you imagine seeing him after a few years into his hero career and he's somehow bulked up even more and he's headed to the gym#scheduled#✿ willow writes#✿ thoughts: kirishima
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Would Halion be sad as well hearing astarion's backstory?
Cause I definitely did 😭😭😭
*Story Spoiler warning / me rambling about my Tav*
Yeah he was pretty devastated... He understood the small parts Astarion told him early on, he knew cazador was a bad person and it fueled a desire to help this random guy claim back his freedom. The vampire part was of course a surprise, Halion can be a little naive so it gave him whiplash lol
But as their journey continued he started to pick up on Astarion's reactions, realising just how much abuse he had endured...
Being a teifling, Halion was able to read the inscription on Astarion's back and help translate it, he of course didn't quite understand it fully, since it was only a fragment of a larger manuscript, but just the fact someone could do that made him angry...
Another case being the drow in moonrise who looked at Halion like he was Astarion's handler, the whole interaction made him mad. He basically told the drow to fuck off.
This followed the interaction with the hug scene
Then jump forward to after killing the orthon, being sarcastic with the "repeat after me: thank you for helping me, it was very kind" - Halion is up for banter, but the way Astarion replied in such a monotone, obedient way made him instantly regret it...
Arriving in Baldur's Gate, paying a visit to the Tabernacle, when astarion says he is not religious because "beleive me, I tried praying to them all, but none of them listened" struck a chord with his devoted Lathander ass...
- Fast forward again to the Szarr palace -
Halion decked Godey. Goodbye skellyman. Fuck you. The palace was not a fun place, and he recognised it brought up some not great memories, reading Cazador's journal also filled up his anger meter... But also admittedly Halion was taken back by the interactions with the spawn in the dungeon. He knew through Astarion's admittance that he himself was just a means of "protection" when they first met, that it was instinctive for him to seduce people as a means to an end. But hearing Astarion agree that Halion could have been one of the victims lured to the palace was a bit of an awakening. Astarion was also very defensive for a lot of the things that he did, flipently pushing the blame. There was a weird mix of emotions, on one hand Halion knew it wasnt Astarion's fault since he had to follow orders, but on the other hand, he felt understandably upset/frustrated.
During the confrontation with Cazador, he stayed silent as he felt it wasn't his place to say anything, instead, got ready to blind him with the sun >:)
The final thing, finding out how old Astarion was before he turned, (possibly a mistraslation so don't come after me) but believed to be about 39 when he died, wrecked him. Firstly, that is a similar age to what Halion is now, secondly in high elf culture, elves are seen as mature 'adults' around 100 years, so not only had astarion spent more time as a slave, then not, but also he was so young when it happened... Halion wants to take the opportunity now to show him the kind of life he should be living at that age.
But in general didn't want to pity Astarion. He is a survivor, he is strong, he is stronger than the person Cazador thought he 'made' him, and he was incredibly proud of his actions in the dungeon. (Stopping the ritual, setting the spawn free)
So yeah, he was very sad, but also incredibly angry on Astarion's behalf, he wants to show he is there as a supportive figure, that it's okay to be vulnerable around him, but also not smother him because he recognises he finally has that independence back :') Bonus for getting this far: (enjoy some cute/silly screenshots)
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someone asked if I live with my parents, in regards to how I have such a large altar, and how they might feel ab it. I was working on a long post ab it but then it vanished into the stratosphere so idk what that was ab or where it went.
But to answer the question, making an incredibly long story short, I do not live with my parents, I live with my partner and a couple roommates.
Tea time :) ☕️ Hot piping tea time besties!!! 🤩
My mom used to be somewhat accepting of my transition and identity. She helped me in the medical care system and even got me testosterone (although she always seemed a bit iffy). However after she met her current partner that all fell apart. He is extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY Christian and extremely controlling. This man burned my bfs hoodie because it had a sigil on it. He red faced SCREAMED (and I mean SCREAMED) in my face that I was going to hell for being trans, that I was disgusting and that he didn’t want me anywhere near his kids. After which, my ✨mother✨ blamed me for pushing his buttons too much (by being trans) and told me she would no longer support my transition. She told me that she would rather burry me in the ground in the event that I lost my life to suicide than deal with having a trans kid. I will never forget that.
That was during the first lockdown at the height of the pandemic, so I was trapped in that house and it was torture. When I say that man is extremely Christian and conservative, I mean it. He forced me and his kids to watch religious videos every Saturday, which were basically just dudes screaming at you that you’ll go to hell if you sin over stock footage of clouds. He would try to guilt trip me for not wanting to participate. (Not to mention he contributed very heavily to my eating disorder by trying to force us all to be vegan and taking away all of my safe foods, despite cooking steaks for himself every night. If I could use one word to describe that man it would be “Hypocrite”. I was constantly anxious and starving, holy shit I could write an entire book about how terrible living in that house with that man was and how betrayed I felt by my mom for putting me through that)
The last straw for my mom was when I expressed to my gender therapists that I really want and need top surgery. She acted like I was springing it on her out of nowhere despite us having conversations about it since I was 14. She told me that I would not be recovering from that surgery under her roof and that it would upset her partner too much. Soon she started making little comments about how disgusted she was in the changes testosterone was giving me, how my voice was getting deeper and how I was gaining muscle, and I became terrified that she would try to force me to detransition.
For me, the final straw was after me and my mom had an argument about money (she took it from my bank account without asking and got mad when I asked for it back) as punishment she decided that I would start having to pay rent for my room in the house. I told her that I would not be paying to live somewhere where I cannot feel safe being myself or bringing my partner around. She told me to either get over it or pay up.
As soon as I turned 18 I started looking into programs in my school that help young queer people who are facing potential homelessness find housing. My mother never explicitly kicked me out (she’ll still say that to this day) but she made it impossible for me to stay. I do believe that her partner was actively trying to systematically get me and my older brother out of the house so he could further isolate my mom. He was the one that told my mom that I was manipulating her into “letting me be trans” by pretending to be suicidal. Yeah. Seriously. And to be honest, it’s fucked up and sad but I also see my mom as a victim due to some other things I won’t mention here (when I say controlling I mean CONTROLLING) But the abuse she went through does not justify her role as my abuser. As much empathy and understanding I have as to why she acted the way she did, I still don’t accept that behaviour. Constantly hearing about how you’re an abomination and how God will surely destroy you starts to take a toll after a while, especially when you’re not allowed to leave the house.
Through my efforts I landed a job but I still didn’t have enough money for even the smallest bachelor pads.
One night after having an extreme meltdown I just… ran away. I went to my bfs house because I didn’t know where else to go, but I was fully prepared to walk to a homeless shelter. I am so incredibly lucky that he and his mother are amazing and understanding people because they embraced me with open arms. They gave me a place to stay and never pressed me about money. I have never gone back to my mother’s house since. If it wasn’t for them I would not be alive right now. They genuinely saved my life and I am forever grateful to them for that.
After my bf and I finally got our own place after living with his parents for nearly 2 years , my mom decided that time passed is equivalent to an apology, and wanted to rekindle our relationship. However, after she tried to visit my place and was met by my roommates who are also all trans, things didn’t go her way. She kept asking for my dead name and misgendering me. My roommates stood up for me and told her that she should stop misgendering me and have some respect, that they didn’t know anyone by that name, and that it’s not cool for her to still be calling me that.
My mom gave me a very angry phone call, telling me that my friends are disrespectful and that they should know that she’s the only person allowed to disrespect me because she gave birth to me. Unfortunately for her that is not the case.
My response to that was this:
and her response was this:
So it was what it was. She tried to withhold my phone plan from me as punishment because it was the only thing left that I relied on her for anymore. I said fuck it, got a new phone plan and continued on with my life.
I’ve tried to have conversations with her to reach an understanding hundreds of times in the past, countless letters and one sided conversations, she was never interested. It is what it is. We haven’t really spoken since then and I’m content with that. Believe me, I have said all I could possibly say.
In terms of my paganism, my whole family subscribed to a certain genre of black conservative Christianity that sees all indigenous forms of spirituality as evil. I don’t know how much they know about my craft but I know they hate it, and that’s fine. My mom hates my dark art and wanted me to use my ✨talents✨ to make Christian art. The only person in my family who even somewhat understands me is my older brother and we have a good relationship. I am no longer concerned with trying to please people who don’t see me as a person. Those who are real will stick around, and those who won’t, wont.
I know that they probably think I’m lost and broken and using demons to fill the void, and they can think that. One thing I want to make incredibly clear is that I do not harbour resentment towards the Christian God, Christianity or Jesus Christ for the terrible actions of his followers. I came to peace with and forgave him long ago. I love him. My being a Luciferian is not revenge against my mom or God. That God has always been there for me and supported me for who I am through all of this, and he still does.
Since I was a child I’ve always been told that I don’t know who I am, that I can’t think or speak for myself, and since I was a child I have always remained 10 toes down on who I am. They won’t believe that I’m really trans until the day I die, they won’t believe that I lived a beautiful and fulfilling life as a devotee of Lucifer because they cannot fathom that I know and love myself. Oh well, they say success is the best revenge.
I love my family and I always will, but for their comfort and my safety I keep my distance from them. I’m pretty damn sure they wouldn’t want to be anywhere near me anyways with all their paranoia about the devil.
Funnily enough Lucifer has been excellent bigot repellent for me. He’s always protecting me from people who would hate me anyways. If my paganism is such an abomination that it prevents my past abusers from hurting me more, then that’s a bonus in my eyes. Stay the fuck away from me if it bothers you so much, we don’t have enough in common to have a productive conversation anyways. If ever my mother came to me honestly and sought true redemption, I would certainly forgive her, I don’t enjoy being estranged. But that would take effort and care on her part, and that simply does not seem to be her biggest priority right now, it never was and I never was. It izz what it izz 🤷♂️
So yeah, tldr, I definitely don’t live with my parents lol.
#luciferian witch#luciferism#luciferian#lucifer#lucifer devotee#theistic luciferianism#lucifer deity#lord lucifer#paganism#pagan#magick#occultism#demonology#demonolatry#deity worship#witchcraft#trans pride#transgender#lgbtq
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Autistic Anime Boys Prelims - Propaganda Division - Group 7
Propaganda:
Ash -
"he just has those vibes ya know?"
Charce -
"Has a very hard time understanding the emotions of others along with his own emotions. Others claim that he acts in a very strange way before it's confirmed that most of the things others thought were weird of him were either because it had to do with biology, his special interest, or it was him acting like how he thinks normal people act when he doesn't understand the way neurotypical people act in the slightest."
Setsuna -
"recent scientific developments find that autism might just be stored in the hair."
Nicol -
"A constantly expressionless boy who does not show his feelings, Nicol is quiet and tends to be distrustful. He is fiercely protective of his sister, and though his pretty face makes him popular, he resents that it means that those outside of his friend circle only see him for his looks."
Galo -
"HIS SPECIAL INTEREST LITERALLY HELPED HIM SAVE THE EARTH FROM EXPLODING!!! HE STOPPED MID FIGHT ON TOP OF A BURNING HIGH RISE BUILDING TO SHOW A TRIO OF ARSONISTS A PROJECTOR POWER POINT PRESENTATION OF EDO PERIOD FIREFIGHTING!!!! HE COULDN'T PILOT THE ORIGINAL DESIGN OF A GIANT ROBOT BECAUSE IT DIDN'T LOOK COOL AND HE COULDN'T JIVE WITH IT! AND ON TOP OF EVERYTHING HIS REACTIONS AND MANNERISMS TO FRUSTRATING SITUATIONS (ANGRILY SHAKING HIS HAIR WITH HIS HANDS AND RUNNING OFF IN A SITUATION THAT UPSET HIM IN A MANNER AKIN TO SENSORY OVERLOAD, COMBINED WITH HIM ESCAPING TO A QUIET AND COLD PLACE WITH LITTLE TO NO OUTSIDE STIMULUS TO CHILL OUT) PLUS HIS INCREDIBLY BLUNT WAY OF THINKING AND ODD MANNER IN SOCIAL SITUATIONS!!!!! THIS IS PEAK AUTISM! THE AUTISTIC ANIME BOY WITH A BURNING SOUL!"
Yuuji -
"The entire manga is about the mc moving to a new school and getting helped out by Yugami and then being like 'hey who is that guy' and all her classmates are like 'oh that's Yugami. He sucks.' And then she's like 'oh how sad everyone's bullying this guy :( I bet he's actually rlly nice since he helped me out' and then she tries to interact with him and. No actually he just sucks. The title is a reference to the fact that. He flat out refuses to make friends. People try a lot and he just rejects them. He's the ace of the baseball team but everyone hates his guts, INCLUDING his battery partner, who is just. Totally exasperated all the time. Anyways Yugami has a special interest in rakugou and will just. Recite rakugou. He does it in order to calm himself down during baseball games and everyone's like 'what.' He also jumps interests quite a bit? But every time he gets OBSESSED. There was a period where he was obsessed with building furniture. He cannot read social cues and he does not care. Like at all. He really likes structure! He makes a list every day of all the things he has to do and then checks them off. They have a school festival and he goes to every single exhibit. Just to check them off his list. Not even an actual visit. He pops in and immediately leaves. Someone will talk about some relationship issue and he's like 'just like in [rakugou].'"
Yasutora -
"People think he’s intimidating, but he’s one of the kindest characters in the show! He comes across as having a fairly flat affect with few expressions, and he’s often misinterpreted as being scary by others who don’t know him. He used to be aggressive, but chose to never fight unless protecting someone due to his abuelo’s influence, and I think he’s a low empathy flat affect icon!"
Taiyou -
"He befriends the main character through the power of autism (being completely unaware of the social cues telling him to avoid her and being extremely straightforward when complimenting her). He’s able to inadvertently twist any conversation by misinterpreting what people say, often taking things literally. The idea that someone doesn’t like this girl just Does Not Compute in his head. He’s astoundingly hyperempathetic, just the idea that he may have hurt someone made him burst into tears; and yet he seems to have difficulty reading other people’s emotions. And he has no sense of personal space at all. He’s a sweetheart and he makes up for every shitty “neurotypical person proves how nice they are by befriending the autistic person” trope."
Kai -
"I don’t think I can explain this in a convincing manner, but trust me it makes sense. For an (ex)assassin he is so bad a lying, he brings up details no one was talking about and ends up getting himself into trouble because of it. This is a massive spoiler, but I do think it’s really important to the point; during the first main game the cast are discussing the kitchen incident and whether or not Kai actually threatened Nao, causing her to attack Sou. During which they ask the question why? Why would Kai want Nao to do that, what would he get out of it? They eventually come to the conclusion that it’s because he was trying to steal the computer that Sou had found, and this immediately dooms Kai to his unfortunate fate. But the only reason they are able to get there is because Kai himself says ‘to steal something perhaps?’ when being questioned why he’d have it out for Sou. At that point it’s not even being bad a lying, there was no attempt to lie there he just said what happens in front of everyone and doomed himself. I love him but he’s not always the wisest. There’s something about even the main character thinking openly that he’s a bit weird. One of his first lines after being introduced is him worrying about the laundry he left hanging outside. They’ve been kidnapped and put in a death game and he’s worried about laundry. There something relatable about his limited facial expressions. His face doesn’t really change much unless he’s showing really big emotions, which makes him come across as really aloof and mysterious. The classic ’are you okay? you look sad’ face. Kai also won the most autistic Yttd character - excluding Gin- poll, so there’s that."
Albedo -
"Poor boy does NOT know how to be social with people and spends most of his time drawing stuff on a freezing mountain so he can avoid any kind of social interaction. Also he eats spiders and it's funny."
#tumblr polls#autistic anime boys poll#prelims#ash ketchum#pokemon#charce lacroix#astra lost in space#setsuna f. seiei#mobile suit gundam 00#nicol ascart#my next life as a villainess: all routes lead to doom!#galo thymos#promare#yuuji yugami#yugami-kun has no friends#yasutora sado#bleach#taiyou takada#my clueless first friend#kai satou#your turn to die
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