#and for those of you who can see parallel in the 'since when' section ...

[sqgeism]

love mail — some small little headcanons of the dynamic between the reader x anaxagoras 😽 this is for the people who fw stuff like this (* ´ ▽ ` *) if ppl like this i'd love to do phainon and mydei,, and if u wanna know other stuff feel free to ask!! also hi airi if u see this were u srs ab the hsr tag im too shy to clarify ( *´・ω)/(；д； )

more often than not, i tend to portray anaxagoras and the reader as married. that is intentional as i feel like anaxa would struggle to be affectionate with someone who he isn't sure is his forever, so him being married to them gives him great comfort and lets him feel more open to genuine romance.

this is random and it has always depended how you all insert yourselves into the story... how anaxagoras and reader fell inlove, but i always stood firm on the idea that they were professors who fell in love with each other and their respective fields <3 so cute..

the nickname anaxagoras gives them, "dove", is based off the idea that those very birds can represent new beginnings. when he met them, he genuinely thought that he had been given a second chance in life. that in the short time he had left, he was able to see a new perspective on the world just through looking at it through the readers eyes, hence the nickname.

i think in one of my veeery first works of anaxa, he was pretty closed off but still made efforts to be there for his dove, which was a very big jump to suddenly being married! so i want to emphasize that it likely took about 3 years before anaxa would propose to reader. you can take the stuff i've written as their sort of build up but i wanna write a genuinely like.. establishing up to their marriage fic soon! + if anaxa knew just how much reader would mean to him, he would've proposed earlier. since he dies and allat Σ(´□｀ )

i do want to explore more into the more complex and 'darker' themes of a relationship with anaxagoras (this section is for you ri, ily <3) and i do think that before marriage, he was relatively distant but oddly possessive. didn't spend too much time around (chrysos heir things.. research.. all of that took time) and yet he'd get moody when he wouldn't see you during the day. he wasn't as sweet as he is now, either. he was as sharp as his aim—precise and knew where to hit. so arguments, though rare, were still intense to some degree. while you were just trying to communicate, anaxagoras saw it as some sort of debate, a battle of intelligence. he would need to be alone and clear his mind to realize his mistakes.. but be too proud to admit to them until a week or so later, where he musters up the courage to apologize.

thank goodness it wasn't for too long, 8 months of that back and fourth.. anaxagoras is convinced that any sane person would've packed their bags and gone home. however you stayed, despite his indifferent attitude to life. broke down walls he but with bloodied hands from the hardships thrown at him, and loved every ugly part of him before ever seeing the good. he always reminds you that he's eternally grateful that you were tenacious, and avowed that he couldn't ever forgive himself, had you rightfully turned your back on him and found someone else.

porcelain!dove was a really interesting concept that i want to bring back, since i feel like their development tg would be really sweet,, them being parallels of each other and learning how to go through the complexities of human emotions with each other

if i had to describe the way i write anaxagoras, i think of a man who loves his partner dearly—a yearner, even. but there will be more times where he slips up than when he doesn't, as the fact of the matter is; anaxagoras would struggle to be a good husband. he's undoubtedly good to dove, but he fails in romance and especially vulnerability. he's open for you to be vulnerable and will (try) to comfort you.. but never himself, he doesn't feel ready for it even with reader.

reader and anaxagoras live seperately. though you could say that they practically live with him since they're probably at his place more than his own home. i like to think there's an established need for personal spaces, but don't mind sharing in healthy hours. if you did ask to move in with him he wouldn't mind but would make you a seperate lab/office/area for your own work or interests.

anaxa prefers holding readers waist/hip because it lets him be closer rather than holding hands. will do it if you ask though, but that's his default when you two are side by side

the reason he urges you on having you call him anaxa because i hc he sometimes struggles to recognize your voice from other people, or just generally having a hard time to differentiate voices. so letting you call him something special makes sure he knows that whose calling him is important.

if you made a joke about the whole him being tied up in chains thing, he'd say he's not against it. you want to think he's joking but it's in a deadpan voice and you don't know how to feel.

© sqgeism or wtv (^_^;)

[cherrixpie]

Hiiiii I’m so so excited for your requests being open!!! Also CONGRATS ON 300!!!!!!! so deserved.

If it’s alright, may I please req an Enzo fic or headcanon list where reader is like very day dreamy? Like very head in the clouds type of person, preferably Ravenclaw!reader? Anything else is up to you

Thank you so so much for reading my req, and happy new year!

↬ enzo x dreamy!ravenclaw!reader

( masterlist )

I imagine your first encounter being when you ran into him in the corridors one day, completely caught up in one of your vivid daydreams, when you, not for the first time (that day) run straight into someone.

You apologize profusely to the pretty slytherin boy you ran into, his cute smile only worsening your embarrassment.

Despite being in the same grade, you only know so much as a last name about him. Your friend groups have no overlap at all, you barely have any classes together and you have a hard time concentrating in those, so you had never greatly noticed a lot of things about him.

Like how cute and radiant his smile is. How good you could drown in those brown eyes of his. How gentle his hands are, even when he's picking up old schoolbooks. His dimples. His smooth voice. How kind he is, despite you staring at him for a good minute, completely lost in thought (and his eyes)

You are awkward and stutter a lot, but Enzo thinks it's cute. Though he does recommend you see Madam Pomphrey for advice in case you need glasses. At this, you explain your habit of daydreaming, feeling embarrassed, but he only comments how this must be the creative spirit of Ravenclaw

Ever since then, you can't help but notice him more often. You tend to wake out of your daydreams in class whenever Enzo says something, and you notice that he's a good student and almost always right.

You also notice a lot of other things. How he crouches down to pet every cat that crosses his path. How he seems to be Mattheo Riddle’s cooling down pill. That he tends to spill ink on his fingers from writing so fast and proceeds to clean them with a silken handkerchief.

The next time you properly meet is in Hogsmeade’s book store. The Hogwarts library doesn't have many novels and even less muggle books, so you get your supply from Hogsmeade. You run into each other in the muggle section, greeting each other shyly and you somehow find yourself recommending a book.

You thought that would be the end of it, even though your thoughts sometimes slip away to a parallel universe where you could spend more time drowning in those brown eyes. But it isn't.

Only a week later, Enzo calls out to you after class (he has to call your name several times), running up to you and thanking you for the recommendation. Since books are one of the few things you can actually concentrate on, you end up discussing the novel with him in great detail.

That evening in the library, Enzo comes to sit next to you at your usual desk. You realize you can keep your mind on school stuff much better when he's around, somehow. But over your hopeless pining, you tend to miss the flush of his cheeks and flustered expression whenever you accidentally touch hands or you talk passionately about a book.

His friends start noticing that he hangs out with that one Ravenclaw girl that always seems a thousand miles away recently, especially when he starts walking you to classes you have together instead of going with them.

They tease Enzo for falling for someone who's got their heads in the clouds all the time, for ditching them for the quiet mooncalf ravenclaw girl in their grade, but he only scoffs about their teasing remarks and smiles to himself, making them holler with glee.

It took a while for you two to actually cross your platonic boundaries, though. Mainly because his attempts and nudges went right over your oblivious head and you stocked up all signs to your amorous daydreams. Enzo couldn't possibly like you like that, right? It had to be a fickle of your imagination.

Little did you know that Enzo was growing quite desperate as time went on and you failed to pick up on any of his hints. Or did you, and ignored them because you weren't interested in him romantically?

He had one or two smaller breakdowns with his friends who kept reassuring him that he just had to man up and ask you out.

When he finally did, you spaced out for a good few seconds, making him sweat with increasing unrest. When you finally got your mind back, you agreed enthusiastically, stumbling over your words and blushing furiously. Enzo was beyond relieved.

As your boyfriend, Enzo insists on walking you to every class, even those you don't have together, because your daydreaming not only makes you knock into people, objects or walls, but your sparse concentrations on your surroundings (he is the exception) makes you prone to fall for trick steps, false doors or moving stairs.

Enzo loves to listen to you talk. When you trail off in the middle of a sentence, fall silent and stare into space for a while, he waits patiently, caressing your thigh in gentle brushes and waiting for you to return to him.

Sometimes he will ask you to tell him about his daydreams, and when you do, you compliments your creativity and kisses away your embarrassment.

It's much easier to concentrate with Enzo around since his presence alone has the effect that it draws your attention, therefore anchoring you in the present. Especially effective is his touch, though he is a little shy about that.

Enzo would frown and glare at anyone who laughs about you behind your back, even if you tell him it doesn't bother you. If people tease you badly to the point of hurting you, he will call up his friends.

Is that… Mattheo Riddle and Theodore Nott beating up the Gryffindor guy that made fun of you? No, no, darling, don't look at that, just walk with me, yeah?

Enzo calls you his dreamy girl, affectionately referring to you as “dreamy” in general.

He makes sure to write extra orderly when he takes notes in class so they can be of use to you later in case you spaced out in class. When you study together, he always makes sure you drink enough because you tend to forget taking proper care of yourself sometimes.

If the hustle and bustle of school life makes you shifty and nervous, he looks for an empty classroom for the two of you to sit and talk, or lean into each other in silence while runs his fingers through your hair.

You are nervous around his friends, but once they realized how serious Enzo was about you, they have stopped teasing him (so much). Instead, they (at least some of them) make an effort to make you feel welcome (and maybe even making up for bullying you in the past pshhh)

Enzo is absolutely enamored with you and your endearing habits, and he feels honored by your trust. While you could get lost in daydreams for hours, he could spend an eternity being lost in you.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - The Industry is Having Issues But the Spice Spicy Must Flow

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

March 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) eps 1-2 of 10 - One of those "he's dead Jim so time travel" thingames starring MaxNat. I'm over this concept but I do enjoy MaxNat. Phupha (Gun) and Khram (Nat) love each other but Phupha is murdered. Then Khram is pulled to a parallel world where, years ago, Khram and Tai (Max) were in love. However, Khram was killed by Tai’s dad. Now Tai finds alter-Khram. But then there is ALSO an alter-Phupha to deal with. (Phupha is played by Gun Thanawat who was Khom, the repressed butler bodyguard from Unforgotten Night. We like this, but we scared of the love triangle aspect.) Did that make sense? Yeah, okay, see what I mean?

Initial thoughts?

The subs are troubling but I’m enjoying this show a lot. It’s nice to see MaxNat get something meaty to sink their teeth into - that’s not just each other. Also it’s so smart of them to give us a fully fleshed out entire episode developing the alter romance rather than just a separation + death. It makes Khram’s grief and motivation that much more believable. Also it’s really nice to see Nat have good chemistry with other actors. 

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 3 of 8 (10?) - I'm still enjoying it. But Two Worlds is objectively better. So this one has lost ranking. Also, unexpectedly chili (the name of my heavy metal Thai cover band).

Lovey switchy and verse main couple too.

This is all quite pleasing.

The bit where the hosts pretend to be a BL couple actor ship was epic on so many levels.

Also unsettling.

All sex work is performative, and in a way there is something more honest about this depiction, in this setting, than what BL actors are made to do on the promo circuit. Which then begs the question, how different is BL from sex work? That's the unsettling bit, for me anyway. Not to slam on sex work AT ALL, we pro-the-true-pros on this damn blog, but actors have been shaded by association with True Professionals for a very long time and BL has already had one epic shut down in this regard. (See the PerthSaint scandal around Love By Chance, no I will not explain.) Where was I? Oh yes, so anyway, see the Gossip section for the part where they better be paid either way!

Also, since I'm a warped fucker, I found this scene funny.

And then hilarious when all of those BL tropes were just trotted out. Like a greatest hits reel.

Truly beyond meta. (How Absolute BL of them.)

Note he’s even standing in yaoi's patented "hands in pocket with the shoulders back"? 

Meanwhile, the gayest bridge in Thailand made its quarterly appearance:

And lip serviced was paid to the most touristy romantic things you can do in Bangkok.

And I mean lip service literally. 

To Be Continued (Thai C3 Thailand grey) ep 5 of 8 - I’m still enjoying it but getting more and more nervous. We getting too close to Promise territory for comfort. EXPLAIN Ji’s reticence well and do it now or risk audience mistrust. We have to be given a GOOD reason for Ji's behavior, or he'll be irredeemable.

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - NO SINGING. Yes smiley kisses and good communication and a nice healthy relationship. But no singing!

1000 Years Old ep 6 of 12 - Dropping in the ranks. I’m sorry it’s just gotten boring. It has, however, inspired me to invest in my own ridiculous cream fuzzy sweater. Which I plan to wear with leather trousers and huge stumpy boots, like the Kpop queer I truly am. Or do I mean vampire? 

Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) ep 1 of 6 - Seems to be an excuse for a small posse of Thai actors to wander around Tokyo playing tourist and sing in public . Someone stop them?

“Most people think this kind of thing is bad manners .”

Anyway, it’s v boring. I’ll give it one more ep but I suspect I’ll DNF.

Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) eps 1-2 of 6 - Meh. This is also looking suspiciously DNF-a-licious.  

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Unknown (Taiwan Tues Youku YouTube & Viki) ep 5 of 11 - It's brilliant. I love it. I'm ready to hurt. Let’s do this thing. 

Distribution note: This one has been picked up and is also airing on Viki now, so it may lose YT distribution in soem territories. I like Youku's hard subs better than Viki's subs, but that's a matter of preference not information since I don't speak Mandarin.

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 3 of 6 - It is good. Every week I like this show a little more. I'm enjoying a reunion romance explored in Japan's quintessentially contemplative yet slightly surreal way. The juxtaposition of the tenderness of the sex scene with this Japanese brand of authenticity was oddly elegant - for lack of a better way of putting it. All in all, this is a good show. Thought provoking. Stylish.

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 9 of 10 - It remains lovely but they sure are reusing a lot of footage. Also, this was a classic penultimate doom episode. I do wonder how they are going to resolve this show ethically.

My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 6 of 8 - It is what it is, and it isn’t my style of show no matter what country of origin. Oddly that's one of the reasons I don't like it. Anyone could have made this, it's not as Japanese as I want it to be, it's just indie film club high school angst. Yawn.

I watched it, finally

The Servant and the Young Master (Vietnam YouTube) 7 eps - I dislike vertical filming, but I kind of enjoyed this show as a BL. I like class conflict romances. For me the rich kid is a bit too dictatorial (edges into bulling), but it’s kinda works. It’s sparse and underdeveloped and a bit plotless, but mildly entertaining. If you're missing Vietnamese BL you might give it a try. 6/10 

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) 8eps - A Burmese BL that I had thoughts about but actually ended up recommending. Read the saga here:

It's done, ready to binge, but I suck

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps

It's airing but...

Graduation Countdown (Taiwan YouTube) ep 1 of ? - on one hand it's micro-installment vertical, on the other it's adorable and from Taiwan. I blame @heretherebedork entirely for my conundrum. As indeed, I did for My Type back in the day. (That was Nat Chen's first BL, yes of Kiseki: Dear To Me fame.) So I think I will also simply lean on Here to let me know when it's done and binge all at once. It's just too much to ask me to keep up with 2 minute pieces, I don't have that kind of endurance training, not even for BL.

Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - it's finished now, I dropped it at ep 4. Should I bother?

A Secretly Love (Thai Sat WeTV grey) 10 eps - I watched the first ep but grey is too much work for this inferior of a show. I may pick up and binge if it gets distribution but for now, it gets a DNF from me. KimCop might have held this crap together but Kim without Cop? No thank you.

Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing for some reason.

Man Suang that MileApo vehicle from last year is coming to Netflix in the USA. I haven't heard much about it and since the KP stans would have lost their tiny minds if it was any good at all, I'm assuming it's not good at all.

Gossip

Thai BL actor Yoon breaks with his former company and talks about some very very VERY shady goings on in the Thai BL industry. Including not being paid.

And whacha know, same thing happening in Korean BL.

Have I mentioned recently how much I hate the film industry?

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting Soon

3/31 Only Boo! (Thai GMMTV YouTube) 12 eps - New main couple for GMMTV in an idol romance about a boy who dances good and a food stand vendor. Other side of the tracks grumpy/sunshine pair who fall deeply in love but, of course, baby boy idol can't date. Boyband but from GMMTV? Control your singing and I'm game.

4/1 Love is like a Cat (Korea ????) 12 eps - This completed filming Aug 2022(!) which means there have been serious problems with post-production. This is another of Silkwood's Korean+Thai colab projects. Mew Suppasit plays a rookie film star, called the Cat Prince (for his cold arrogance) who goes up against a charismatic puppyish animal daycare director (JM of JUST B). There is also a side romance (love triangle?) with a veterinarian. Geonu of JUST B is also in the cast.

I wonder if this was part of the hold up, with Geonu on Build Up right now, they might have tried to muffle this one. Or maybe it's just that bad...

4/3 We Are (Thai GMMTV YouTube) 12 eps - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon - basically the good kind of messy gay friendship group (so more My Engineer and less Only Friends). Looks a bit like the Kiss series but everyone is queer. I'm IN!

Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV?) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous partner), Best and frest face, news here.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Without ghost girl.

With ghost girl.

I think she may be my favorite part of 1000 Years.

CLASSIC tsundere seme description of a sunshine uke. Like classic'est of classic. (Two Worlds)

Is there such a thing as a tired trope in a BL? Since it is a genre that is made up entirely of tropes quilted together? Your philosophical question for today brought to you by Deep Night's kabedon (Japanese trope) + punishment threat (Thai trope).

Love me a lap sit moment. (City of Stars)

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.

[anilyan]

Venti is Phanes + on Istaroth and the Primordial One

[Edit 13/04/2025: THIS IS OLD AND MESSY. Instead, please check my updated theory, it really goes in-depth and is organized and without inconsistencies. I would have posted it on reddit, but it exceeded the character limit >.< So you can check it on tumblr and twitter]

Not so crack theory: Venti is Phanes and is the androgynous being born from the Chymical Marriage between the Primordial One and Istaroth, before she was betrayed by the Sinners

(I posted this before but now it's properly explained)

I am using this lore in my old mondstadt fic, Nameless (actually soon to turn into trilogy, since vol 2 is about venti rewinding time and vol 3 is present time story and I took so long to plan all the lore with all the canon crumbs and theories we had...)

Yes, a lot of the info about gods is pulled from wikipedia, I’m not being paid to research more, okay? I just want to feed the brainrot. My main sources besides those are the videos listed at the end.

I would love if this theory made its way to some big lore content creator for them to analyse and criticize, because I have been rotating this in my head but I don’t have their capacity or knowledge to tear this apart.

NOTES:

This post contain minimal mentions of 2 leaks, about the rest of the collection of The Pale Princess and the Six Pygmies, and a sus minimal old leak about Venti

This post contains some references to the Penacony arc from Honkai star rail, but no knowledge about the game is required and in fact, I don't even play it myself and those are just sus parallels

0. Summary / main points

Istaroth and the Primordial One parallel Chronos (personification of time) and Ananke (most powerful dictator of Fate and mother of The Fates/Moirai), respectively.

Chronos and Ananke laid down the cosmic / orphic world that created/reshaped the world. In a way, that was an Alchemical Marriage, that also gave birth to the androgynous winged being Phanes/Venti, and to the Abyss,

Venti has many ties to fate, including extensive apple symbology visible even in wisp form. The apples, besides being a symbol of fate, also represent a dream bubble in accordance to the structure of Teyvat. Quoting his most sus birthday art, “It is written that there is a whole tiny world hidden inside an apple core”

Venti has at least some control over 1 half of Teyvat while the other half is ruled by The Night Mother/Nyx. He also offers us half of the apple in the mentioned birthday art.

Ananke was a serpent-like being, and we see a Black Serpent 1) coiled around Phanes 2) coiled around the pearl/cosmic egg in the Gnostic Chorus 3) in the Black Serpent Knights, who also had Ishtar/Istaroth’s star as a symbol 4) In Nibelung, if we consider serpents and dragons the same

Istaroth supported Khaenri’ah (thus why the Nation had her symbol) and both opposed the Heavenly Principles/Celestia, until she was betrayed by the Sinners/6 Pygmies and forgotten

The Primordial One was opposed by Celestia. We also know that Nibelung fought Celestia. They were either allies or even the same being (a black serpent), and their perceived opposition is not too different from how Remus went down misinterpreted by history

1. About the Primordial One

In case it’s not yet clear, this assumes that Phanes =/= Primordial One. After all, the book Before the Sun and Moon simply says that “The Primordial One may have been Phanes*”,* and the fandom just started equating the two.

I am of the opinion that the Primordial One and Celestia are in opposition, while Istaroth is on the side of the Primordial One, or at least opposed to Celestia too. Maybe the Alchemical Marriage was part of a plan of theirs. Read more about it in section 3.

And if the truth about Remuria taught us anything, is that some rivalries depicted in history are false. In the same way Remus went down as a Tyrant when in reality he never wanted to employ force and was even allied with Sybilla (a vishap), I would say that the Primordial One and Nibelung/dragons/vishaps probably found ways to coexist. We do know that Nibelung went to war against the Heavenly Principles/Celestia, but if Celestia and Primordial One opposed each other, that just makes an alliance between PO and the Dragon King more likely.

We don’t know if Primordial One = 1st Descender and Celestia = 2nd Descender, so I will avoid using those terms throughout the post. But if the 2nd who came = 2nd Descender = Celestia, then that would lend further credibility to the idea that Celestia and the PO are on opposing sides, since the 2nd who came basically stole PO’s ruling of Teyvat.

2. About Istaroth AND Khaenri’ah

Like I said above, I believe that Istaroth sides with the Primordial One and that both are in opposition to Celestia

Istaroth has the ability to create alt Looms of Fate through those seeds she gives away - those basically grow into trees that are databases of history outside the control of Celestia. I had already affirmed this for my fic before we got the 2nd Caribert quest, but at this point is practically confirmed.

Istaroth is based on Astaroth and Ishtar, and Ishtar’s morning star is an 8-pointed star just like the symbol of Khaenri’ah. And so the Black Serpent Nights probably served Istaroth in some way.

Khaenri’ah supposedly didn’t have a god, but let’s keep in mind Istaroth was forgotten by time. It’s also possible that, even if Khaenri’ah had a god, they still considered themselves the pride of humankind since Istaroth likely wasn’t associated with Celestia, as I mentioned

Speaking of Black Serpents, other prevalent Black serpents are the one in the Gnostic Chorus, and Nibelung, in a way (not sure if they are or not the same entity). So I would say that Nibelung is/was also allied with Khaenri’ah/Istaroth/Primordial One. Please refer to the section above for an explanation.

The 6 Pygmies and the Pale Princess is a book that is an allegory for the 5 Sinners of Khaenri’ah + Dainsleif and Istaroth. I include, at the end, a video that explains that properly and is very much worth the watch. From there (or at least, from the leaked volumes), we know that the Sinners basically betrayed Istaroth, which might explain why she ended up being forgotten and why Dainsleif is the only Pygmie that didn’t go fully down the Sinner’s path.

3. The relationship between the Primordial One and Istaroth

Like I say above, many things point to them being allied. At the very least, we can quite safely infer they both opposed Celestia/The Heavenly Principles and in turn allied with Khaenri’ah.

The cosmic/ orphic/world egg was created by Chronos (personification of time) and Ananke (most powerful dictator of Fate and mother of The Fates/Moirai). “Ananke and Chronos are mates, mingling together in serpent form as a tie around the universe. Together, they have crushed the primal egg of creation of which constituent parts became earth, heaven and sea to form the ordered universe.”

Ananke and Chronos have to be the PO and Istaroth - which one is which is a bit debatable, with their genders being a counterargument on its own. But I would say Chronos is Istaroth (due to her associations with time, although she is more a god of moments than of time) while Ananke is the Primordial One (who had the 3 moon sisters/moirai as shades + is probably the Dreamer/HSR’s SUNday parallel who plays the symphony that creates the fates reflected by the moons (read more in next section)).

The cosmic egg that birthed the world, together with the Abyss AND Venti, probably resulted from their Alchemical Marriage. I wouldn’t be too surprised if it was also the Gnostic Pearl depicted in the Gnostic Chorus cutscene, or even if the Black Serpent there was Ananke/Primordial One. In fact, that would only solidify the connections with the Black Serpent Knights and them wearing Istaroth’s symbol. And it would be extra funny if somehow the Primordial One and Nibelung were the same entity (since I already explained why I think they were are least on the same side)… and therefore were a black serpent/dragon.

Okay, but what is an Alchemical/Chymical Marriage? It’s a marriage between a Red King and a White Queen, the Sun and the Moon, gold and silver, sulphur and mercury. It’s sometimes pointed as the source of the Philosophers' Stone, and from that union of opposites is birthed an androgynous being. Btw, that marriage is facilitated by a dove, but this is off-topic and you can see why that is interesting in the last video linked. It’s also a process that sometimes involves ‘fermentation”, which is also off-topic but ties well with the wine-making process and other things mentioned in the last video too.

According to Jakob: "The Seal of Chymical Marriage was an ancient Fontainian ritual meant to seal off the source of life. Now it has been reversed, and all has been set free once more!" So, it can be used to separate the Primordial Sea from the world, which sounds similar to creating a world/pearl/philosopher’s stone/egg/dream bubble that floats in the sea of quanta or wtv is the logic used across Hoyoverse’s worlds. We confirm again this was necessary to create Teyvat's egg, and that the Primordial One couldn’t do it alone because two people are required for a marriage.

And do you know what Marriages also require? A ring. Who was escaping with a golden ring, that is an important figure of Khaenri’ah and the only Pygmy who didn’t act like the others/didn’t become a Sinner? Dainsleif, whose constellation is even a Serpent ring. May I point to the Das Rheinegold music drama, that is part of the series The Ring of Nibelung, and maybe use that as extra merit to associate the Primordial One with Nibelung?

4. About the world of Teyvat

Dragons = Vishaps = Sea slugs = Bees = Seelies. Yes. We already know that the the dragons and seelies in Genshin are based on irl sea slugs, I won’t elaborate on that. As for Bees, that is because we have seelie-like bees in Remuria, connected to the prophet Golden-Bee Sybilla (don’t mistake Sybilla with Sylla, who is a Dragon King, although I guess this is all the same family)

Teyvat is theoretically 2 worlds/halves, the version we know and the mirror world, that is probably the Abyss. Or maybe all of it is a mirror world, idk. We can even see similar world structures in Honkai Star Rail, especially in Penacony, where the world there is literally mirrored and a dream too. Some people say Teyvat is divided in 3 parts: the Light Realm, Void Realm, and the Human Realm. But I think the Pimordial One just transformed the Light Realm into the Human Realm, so there are still 2 parts only, and we know they can overlap anyway.

Cycle: People die » are absorbed by the roots » are supposed to travel to the top of the world tree (inverted, so top is in abyss) to become Irminsul fruit / stars » said stars form constellations that determine people's fate, or more accurately, since they are all in a dream, are data that allows the tree to predict their fates » it’s because people exist as stars that their fates and presence can be summoned in the form of shooting stars

Dainsleif confirmed that the leylines can be woven to determine Fate / have their records changed. The Loom used to weave them is a Symphony, or in other words, Remus’ Symphony of Fate is very similar or the same thing as a Loom of Fate, although maybe not at the same scale. It’s possible that other God-Kings also attempted to create their own Looms of Fate.

Add to that some Penacony’s parallels, and you can infer that the Symphony is controlled in a floating palace, that is actually a Grande Theater, by the Sun(day) (potentially Phanes or the Primordial One, basically the one who Dreams), and it’s reflected by the moons (Aria, Sonnet and Canon, so the musical associations are fitting). Considering that the 3 moon sisters are also probably the mythological Moirai who weave Fate, yeah, that tracks.

5. Finally, about Venti

Addressing the Venti is/isn’t the weakest Archon debate: Idk and I don’t quite care, because regardless of how much power he holds now, this theory is about his origins and role more than anything.

Venti is the one narrating the Gnostic Chorus cutscene, so clearly he knows about the origins of Teyvat and other important stuff. Yes, it can just be because of his ties to Istaroth who had the winds of time and bla bla, but I would say he has a bigger involvement.

In the Gnostic Chorus, there is a Black serpent, and I already mentioned how it ties with Khaenri’ah and Istaroth in the second section. Well, Phanes is a figure that has a serpent coiled around him too, Ananke, to be more precise.

Phanes was believed to have hatched from the egg of Chronos and Ananke (Istaroth and PO, section 3), OR Nyx in the form of a black bird and wind, OR from the cosmic /orphic egg placed in and hatched from Aether, who was the personification of the bright upper sky and another son of Chronos. Regardless, it seems like the egg birthed both Phanes AND the world?

Phanes is described sometimes as male, sometimes as androgynous. I don’t need to explain how that fits Venti. The androgynous part also fits with how a being born from an Alchemical Marriage should be androgynous due to being an union of opposites.

Phanes is also described has having wings and a crown. We are yet to see a crown, but at least the angel wings are there.

Some myths say that Phanes was Dionysus (god of wine… amongst other things), or Eros (god of love, yes I’m simplifying), and oh boy isn’t Venti the god of all of that too? Although this is complicated since it has to do with gods being iterations of past gods and such, you can read more about it here

In a certain play, after Phanes mates with Chaos, he creates flying creatures. It would also fit Venti well, especially given that tale from Amber’s Quest where he taught birds how to fly.

Okay, this gets less obvious now. Phanes is a first-born deity who emerged from the abyss and gave birth to the universe, and is a god of creation, light and goodness. The Abyss part is extra intriguing because the world has an abyss half, and some in-game books even compare wine with the Abyss, and also with the idea that drinking the abyss/wine is a way to acquire Forbidden Knowledge. Please, check the last video I link.

Phanes counterpart is Nyx (Night). In some tales she is Phane’s wife, sometimes his daughter, and in others she creates an egg from which Phanes is born, so wtv. I don’t know who Nyx is (besides being clearly The Night Mother from the book of the Six Pygmies), but it’s pretty clear that the Abyss half is under her responsibility in some way.

Oh, right, this was a sus leak that broke my mind months ago and seemed completely nonsensical, but since I started cooking this theory, I can’t help but look back at it. It claimed that Venti was the guide of the Primordial One. Humm… yeah, if Venti was part of a plan between Istaroth and PO, I can see that, although I don’t know what the goal could be. Maybe he is assuming Istaroth’s role now that she is gone in supporting the PO?

This is a very wild guess, but I really thing Venti has something to do with the Gnostic Pearl. Idk if that pearl is the same one that hatched the world, or something that holds the world together (think Mikha from HSR), but I can imagine him having some responsibility over taking care of it.

And if you think Venti holding Fate in his hands is a stretch… let’s talk about Apples. Especially in anime, Apples are often depicted as the fruit of Fate (look no further than Mawaru Penguindrum), and in Inazuma, the girl giving Fortune Slips is called Gendou Ringo, with Ringo meaning ‘apple’ in Japanese. Well… Mondstadt is a land full of apple trees, Venti loves apple cider and is often asking for apples to pay for his performances, is being given an apple in archon form in one of his birthday arts, created the Golden-Apple Archipelago, and even the top of his head in wisp form resembles an apple stem. Seriously, I go crazy with how many people never noticed that. This is too much in our face to not be relevant.

This sounds like a stretch, but apples are round and so the shape is not too different from a dream bubble. And do you know what the birthday art I mentioned had in the caption? “It is written that there is a whole tiny world hidden inside an apple core. Here, this half is for you. Let's take a stroll in the tiny little world. But remember to keep it a secret because... you're the only one I want to bring there.” If he isn’t holding Fate or a world in some way, then I don’t know what this is supposed to mean.

You know how I said that Teyvat is divided into 2 halves? That also connects well with his quote (when he gives us half of the apple/world), and with the idea that Phanes is the day while Nyx is the night. So maybe Venti is responsible for the half of Teyvat that we know/he gave us while Nyx is responsible for the Abyss side.

So… is there any proof that Venti is Phanes? No. Are there many many sus elements about him and connections with the things I listed? Yes. I could see the Traveler being Phanes and being entrusted the Light/Human half of Teyvat by Venti as a scenario just as likely, especially if The Abyss sibling ends up being/becoming Nyx, but I like this version more xD

But even if the main theory ends up being wrong, I hope people you got some things to think about.

Some videos for extra lore, more a less in order of relevance

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZIR-tfzfd4 » Reinterpretation of all volumes of the Six Pygmies and the Pale Princess in light of finding out about the 5 Sinners of Khaenri’ah + Dain + connections of Istaroth with Khaenri’ah

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zK3xYKtUniQ » More about the connections between Istaroth and Khaenri’ah

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePjY4c0Rj0k » Elaborates on how a Loom of Fate is basically another database, as opposed to the Irminsul, and mentios how Istaroth can could create several Looms of Fate

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAm9uElsKd4 » Parallels with the Penacony arc from Honkai Start Rail and list of evidences that Teyvat is a Dream bubble

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhST-fz6Yps » Video is from before we learned about the 5 Sinners, and I’m not fully sold on the chronology, but I still think it does a good job at elaborating n the serpent thing from the gnostic chorus and other things we can infer about genshin thanks to parallels to Penacony

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHCv8KFdL6M&t=1045s » Ties sacramental bread and blood with wine and the way wisdom/abilities can be passed down thrown ingesting parts of gods, and the concept of fairy rings and The Ring of Nibelung, with the concept of a Chemical Marriage.

[familyvideostevie]

tlou hbo season 2: episode 1 thoughts

well, some of you (like, three people) asked for my thoughts on each episode of the last of us on HBO so, here we go! as a disclaimer i am a game fan first and foremost and am perhaps predisposed to be critical of the show, but I'm also here for a good time. and if you're enjoying it fully i love that for you. my thoughts are divided into good, iffy, and bad.

spoilers for tlou part ii and tlou HBO below!

EPISODE 1: FUTURE DAYS

GOOD -the opening scene of our time jump was great. i love seeing the physicality of ellie -- this will, hopefully, come into play later. she is scrappy and she is brutal and perhaps she doesn't see just quite what she is capable of. also, love how bella pitched their voice down a bit in this scene! i wish it carried throughout the episode but what can you do. -dina and joel: while i think this relationship is being used very incorrectly, i always wanted more of the two of them. i think it tells us how joel is viewed in the community, which adds to the sense of loss once he's killed. in the game we get really slight mentions of joel from jesse and dina but i have to imagine he's quite a community figure, and this shows that. -when dina said "are you in fucking therapy" i felt that because i also said that out loud -Ellie and Tommy with the rifle: i have a hunch that this is going to be a replacement for the hunting flashback because it largely serves the same purpose (tommy conveying to ellie joel's worry, ellie being petulant) and while the content of the scene will be in my iffy/bad section, i like them together. -Joel paying gail in weed is hilarious -Ellie's garage: love the details here and how it's got its own life outside of her garage in the game. i think the space looked lived in and very her. also, the shot of her cleaning the gun at the workbench was a nice easter egg for gamers. also, her tattoo! love. ALSO her shoes! love. -Jesse. I actually loved every single thing about him. I think they're giving him a bit more of a big brother slant -- he's established as older than i thought he was according to Dina, and you get the sense that he's running patrol because he's responsible. i wonder if that will be why he goes after ellie and dina more than as a friend. -the grocery store. everything about this sequence was great to me. the set, the outside, the bottle, ellie killing the clicker in a very part i way. the stalker. my god, did i love the stalker. i have mixed feelings on the reveal of it being a new-to-jackson infected but read on for those thoughts. i loved the movement of the actor, the SOUNDS, and the makeup. really captured the dread of the scene. -Ellie and her notebook! don't fuck it up don't fuck it up don't fuck it up. so lovely. -The dance. So, the cut scene from the game occurs in a very different place, and I have a lot of (negative) feelings about it coming so early here. But the way it was basically a 1:1 (minus the context) to the game...gorgeous. I cried. The outfits, the shot of Ellie's head and the lights, the dialogue, and the music. God, I'm so glad they used Crooked Still (even if the album came out in 2006. who cares! no rules).

IFFY -Salt Lake Crew reveal: I am not sold on this introduction so early. Having the flashback of Abby and co before the time jump is...interesting. I think it ups the conflict level, sure, since you know something is coming. They become a looming threat. Since we aren't told who any of them are aside from Abby and we're not told why they are hell-bent on revenge yet, it might shake out. That, at least, parallels the game in many ways. I think it will depend on how much of them we get next episode in the lead-up to Joel's murder. I can't figure out if I think it would be better to have them just...show up in Jackson, or if knowing they are Fireflies who are after Joel specifically matters. -Tommy & Ellie: Tommy lies to Joel about being with Ellie, but he is honest to Ellie about Joel's feelings. Again, I think this relationship and the way they're talking about what's happening between Joel and Ellie is diluted by the fact that Ellie and Joel are not estranged (I'll talk more about this in the next section). This scene and this relationship feels more powerful to me when she's younger -- and the way Tommy handles her desire to go on patrol was off but I can't figure out why (might be a consequence of the timeline mixing). I also don't know why he lies to Joel, especially when there is already clear tension between Joel and Maria and Joel and Ellie. Joel and everyone else important in Tommy's life, clearly, except Benji. -Dina & Ellie being silly: One of my issues with s1 is I don't think it struck the right balance for Ellie of being someone who lives in A Very Hard Time and has Seen Shit and being 14. I think that shows here, too -- she and Dina are 19. They function as adults in a community where they have responsibility and respect. But I just felt like they were flippant. It's obviously not a bad thing for young people to feel joy and be silly even when the stakes are so high, but to me it feels just a little off-center. Dina's purpose, in my opinion, is to remind Ellie of reality. The world outside of her own head, of her own sadness, her own trauma. To set her on a path that leads her somewhere good, rather than what she ends up doing. Maybe this will become clearer when they are in Seattle! -The council. LIke, yeah, obviously there are 10000 details about Jackson that are interesting because how does it even function? The council, the house building plans, the patrol structure, the refugee crisis (mentioned in the next section). I think it's worldbuilding that will matter because clearly Jackosn will become destabilized, but my god, I just don't care.

BAD -joel the angry man. i won't rehash this but here's the ask i answered about it (very long and very all over the place). -joel in therapy: listen. I know that this is a nice idea. I really, really do. Therapy is great. However, you cannot convince me that Joel Miller would go to therapy. Has he been through some shit? Some serious, serious, shit? yes. Has he functioned for 20+ years with and through that shit? yes. It obviously goes hand-in-hand with his relationship with Ellie -- because this version of Joel is trying to fix it, he needs help. So he goes here, and thus takes action to better the broken bond between them. I just fundamentally disagree with this character choice for him on so many levels. It's a really nice idea that he would seek help and work on repairing the rift but i simply don't buy it because, as I say in my really long post about joel the angry man, he does not regret his choice even if it means he loses ellie. cause she's alive. so, no need for therapy. whatever. i think it's so stupid. -Ellie yelling about her immunity with Tommy. This was ...weird to me. Immature and unnecessary. If there is one thing Ellie understands, it's the stakes of hiding her immunity. Yeah, it annoys her, we know that. It's annoying but she works hard to be a valuable member of the community. And she clearly understands the weight of it --she cuts herself to make the bite she gets from the stalker look like a clean slice. Like, she knows, so why have her stress Tommy out like that? -the refugee plot. Okay. I think it's clearly meant to be tension between Joel and Maria, as well as making us consider how good of a person we think Joel is (for whatever reason). I think the theme here is really interesting in like, any other show. How do you draw lines between our people and other people, how do you protect a community while maintaining its integrity, how do you choose who lives and who dies (central pillar of tlou!). But. I think this would be much better interrogated with the Seraphites and the WLF but we all know that sure as shit ain't happening for reasons I cannot begin to explain here. Choke, Neil. -Sorry pedro but I hate your Texas accent -Curtis and Viper: So, while I like the idea of Joel and Dina being familiar because it indicates Joel's larger role in the community, I HATE that she is involved in the movie night. I do not understand why -- is Ellie supposed to be jealous? Is she supposed to feel bad about the boundaries she's trying to set that he is not responding to? I do not understand this change and my confusion is compounded by the mixing of the timelines of the day or so leading up to Joel's death. (It occurred to me this morning that he might not die right away -- maybe in a few days, maybe a week or so. Which changes the potency of so much of this anyway. we'll see!) -Discovering stalkers: It's just petty of me but the fact that stalkers are new to the universe of the show is Mazin covering his ass for not writing enough infected into season one. but so help me god if we don't get shambles too...come on. I think it's just lazy and obviously, they can't fix it now but the idea of a "smart" infected feels so so so lazy to me. -the dance/ellie and the porch/abby and co arriving to jackson. I do NOT understand the timeline we are working with. Obviously I am having a hard time because i am comparing it to the game -- so maybe they'll convince me. But again, using the dance so early feels like being punk'd (anyone remember watching the original tlou part ii gameplay trailer? similar feeling of dread here) cause like, what else are they doing? and then the way ellie goes to the porch but not up it -- it makes sense in the context of their relationship in the show but fuck me it broke my heart to think that we aren't going to get that emotional journey because it's so so so beautiful in the game. i just. don't get it. also abby and co arriving that night -- i wonder if this means they will camp out for a few weeks and we actually have more time for joel/ellie to fester before it's all over.

so! there we have it. i did not reread this so sorry for all the typos/misspellings. would love to discuss, feel free to comment/dm me/send an ask. i love tv i love tlou i love talking out of my ass and analyzing. so excited for what's to come. let's seeeeee how it goes!

[screwyoubatjokesiscanon]

Okay little idea I have in my head when I see your post about Abang Kasim and Pirates dude. I never notice that they work together now. Not only that they we're close to stand side by side! Even Fang can bring himself to stand by his brother side as his brother so cold toward everyone and basicly push everyone aside.

But that pirates dude?? Get to be at Kaizo/Kasim side?? Wow. I guess the disguise do help Kaizo being little lose and actually bond with pirates dude since the pirates dude really is frienly. The angst idea tho...

Like all the pirates dude now work for Tapops. But here the thing we never actually why they work for Tapops. They could be 'force' to work as prisoner of Tapops as way to pay back all their crime. Because yes they we're criminal too and they actually enjoy being criminal.

The pirates dude and Kaizo come long way after the betray arc. Kaizo could be the one in charge to take care of all the prisoners in Kaizo section. Kaize and the pirates dude didnt get along at first. The pirates dude keep rebeling against Kaizo and try to run away with his buddy multiple time. Still hurt and betray by 'Kasim'.

Imagine that the pirates dude keep calling Kaizo 'Kasim' as nick name. It's to annoyed Kaizo actually. But again each time Pirates dude call Kaizo "Kasim" the more he feel hurt. He use it like curse. He thought he made a friend and allies. Only for Kaizo to stab him as his friends back? The fuvk. Pirates dude really hate Kasim.

Kaizo actually feel bad to all the pirate people. He spend so much time as Kasim to know about them. It's for mission to understand the enemy. But he know more about them in many way. And Kaizo notice that they actually not that bad unlike their boss.

They can be nice. Genuenly care for each other and have feeling.But again they still a criminal that do staff they isn't suppose to do. They never really question everything as long as they have fun and get pay for it. That the life those criminal choose.

When Kaizo first starting the mission that Pirates dude is actually the first Pirates that being 'friend' with him. He really is frienly and Kaizo have to admit it's tiring to be someone else. But Kaizo do find the Pirates dude is easy to be with. Maybe it's personality of the pirates. And fact Kaizo actually smiles when Pirate dude is around telling something that Kaizo dont understand. He actually happy to be friends with the Pirate Dude

Kaizo atleast own little apologies to Pirates dude for lying and betray their so call friendship. And that all Pirates dude want to hear..

Pirates dude: So Kasim-

Kaizo: Kaizo. My real name is Kaizo...

Pirates dude: Kaizo...

Kaizo: What's your name actually?

Pirates Dude: Oh...I dont have a name.

I know right!? That's what I'm saying too!! You are saying EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT.

I might write them a fanfic soon actually, this is VERY similar to what I had in mind!

Like- everything you said? It was like you read my mind!!

And In the comic, kaizo and Pirate dude are all fun and cheery one sec and kaizo goes all serious the next sec when he's with the other pirates in the next panel, where our pirate isnt! Its like as soon as pirate guy is a certain distance away, he takes kaizo's happiness with him-

So after the armada join TAPOS, kaizo still "acts" like 'Kassim' as in 'quirky fun space carwash guy' but only with this ONE specific pirate, and they still have the matching bandanas!

I also noticed parallels b/w Kassim and Fang in this, because fang's og name was 'Pang', but it wasnt truly himself, but when he used a fake name- "fang" and went in a disguise with ulterior motives, just like kaizo does as "kassim", he makes friends and becomes Fang, Pang is a shell of who he was- troubled and sad and serious- instead of being the child he is, but after he made friends and became Fang, he's more "himself", so much so that even his own brother, who knows what his og name is and has been calling him that since he was born, starts to call him Fang, because thats who he is now, the real him. Free, childish, happy. And most of all, having fun Living life instead of just surviving and fighting!

Same goes for Kaizo as kassim! He uses fake name, goes in with a disguise and ulterior motive, but makes a friend and acts more fun and happy when he's with that one friend- pirate guy! I feel like Pirate guy is the only one Kaizo|Kassim feels he could be himself around, he lets his gaurd down and acts a little silly, just like Fang with Boboiboy and everyone else! He's uptight around even his little brother, but trusts pirate guy and lets loose around him, like he's at ease. Like he's Happy.

Anyways yeah- sorry for the rant- its just that you get it! I'm not crazy! Its there for anyone to see!

[homestuckreplay]

In Our Four-Person Society, Who Is The True And Rightful Queen?

(page 1608-1622; existential sburb angst)

This section picks up the exiles’ story that’s run throughout Act 4 so far, where seeing John through WV’s terminal has triggered PM’s memories from long ago. Her past and present finally collide with the introduction of the White Queen, and it… does NOT go as I expected.

WV and AR build a crown out of a mailbox, which at first feels Very Not Okay, because I think PM would be furious about this use of her sacred envelope receptacles. And yet, maybe the worm knows something I don’t, because it doesn’t step in to stop this desecration. It’s sweet to see WV and AR collaborating on this craft project – it hits different knowing that ‘P4RT OF TH31R JOB 1S TO R3BU1LD L1F3 4ND C1V1L1Z4T1ON’ (p.1524) because they are literally already doing that. They’re working together on both material construction and electing a ruler, and it’s been minutes since WQ arrived, so imagine what they can accomplish in a few decades or centuries. I would love to see their version of Earth, and I’m curious on if the exiles’ rebuilding looks similar to how the planet originally looked, recreating the same society over and over, or if they’ll come up with something wildly different.

WQ herself has perched elegantly on a rock and is simply watching and waiting as the crown is made. I think this scene is final evidence that the war between light and dark is irrelevant now – both WV and AR have instant allegiance to her. But how does this tie into WV’s hatred of the monarchy? Kings are not okay but queens are fine? I’m so into how this section ends regarding its treatment of the monarchy, but this specific action is really hard for me to reconcile with WV’s established worldview. So unless there’s a reveal still to come, this page feels like a mistake.

PM investigates the ‘egg!’ noise she heard on page 1547, and immediately readies her sword. Here there’s a pause in updates for a few hours – for me it was overnight, so I was kept in suspense and fully expecting her to come out and launch an attack. I think that’s intentional, and it’s definitely more effective with the pause than when you can immediately tab to the next page.

There’s also quite a few visual parallels here – pages 1611-12 are a pair introducing PM’s memory, going from present to past, and 1620-21 bookend it by going from past back to present. It’s an important section that gives us key information about the kids’ Sburb session, and those frame images add some extra gravity. (Sidenote: I love page 1612’s depiction of Prospit, and how it looks like PM is wreathed in flames as she enters the throne room). Page 1613 (4:13 in 24 hour time), where we see the White Queen on her chessboard throne, is a perfect inversion of a previous panel introducing the Black Queen (p.1535).

So the panels are based on perfect mirrors and inversions, but the narrative subverts these. The Black and White Queens are different people, and people are complex enough that it’s reductive to see their goals and tactics as opposites. I could say that the white queen is opting for a strategy of conciliation and patience, while the black queen’s strategy is based on aggression and immediacy. Even if that’s true, PM, a key agent of the light kingdom, has demonstrated a willingness to run headfirst into enemy territory and use a sword against an opponent if necessary. And Jack has demonstrated a willingness to let a critical prisoner leave and sit around in his office doing fuck all. So, any kind of strategic inversion doesn’t apply to the kingdoms as a whole.

It comes back to the question of whether they’re programmed video game NPCs – which feels true with the imps, ogres and basilisks the kids are fighting, as well as the exposition-giving salamanders – or whether they’re conscious lifeforms with some amount of free will, which feels true for all the exiles, Jack, and the more innovative salamanders like Crumplehat, the Secret Wizard, and perhaps Casey. It’s uncomfortable to sit with, in a good way. John kills an imp for 32 build grist and 10 shale (p.400) and I’m happy for his victory and his cute lil smile. But if John killed WV I’d be feeling very differently. And, PM’s breaking out of her assigned role is explicitly motivated by her talking to Jade and Jade’s desire to send an important package to her friend. That’s unique to their session, and suggests that in another session, PM might have stuck to her pre-programmed role. Different agents would have stepped up to become exiles – we can see this in the trolls’ session, where Slick, Boxcars and Droog were exiled, while their counterparts in the kids’ session were not.

So if any NPC potentially has the power to do this, was Rose right to be uncertain about killing the ogre? And then, is it possible for John to stop killing imps, and instead ask them really nicely to leave him alone and he’ll alchemize some cool stuff for them to play with? And then again, why would any player do that, when it would make the game infinitely harder for them, because they wouldn’t have grist and resources to work with? Is Sburb basically turning John and his friends into CEOs or government leaders or military generals, who see a whole population as ‘human capital’ or as resources to be extracted from, as a mass defined by its total size instead of a collection of individuals? Those are the big questions, and they’re not ones I want a concrete answer to. It’s a way more interesting story to sit with that discomfort of ‘who counts as a person’ than to get a firm answer that actually, it’s okay to kill some of them.

Back on topic, PM tells WQ the whole story, showing her own loyalty to her kingdom despite the sword she now wields, and WQ responds by abdicating the throne, providing context for why ‘the forces of light are always destined to lose, without exception!’ (p.424). Taking off her ring physically changes WQ, removing her tentacles, catlike face and giant jester horns, and restoring her arm and eye. This is cool for a few reasons – first, it suggests the queen’s prototyping is held in her ring, and that another character could wear the ring to also get these changes. Second, a Sburb strategy could be prototyping sprites with super powerful creatures and then stealing a queen’s ring so that a player could take that power. Third, a player who tries a strategy of prototyping sprites with very weak objects – ones with missing limbs, for example – could have their plans subverted, as the queen can simply remove the ring if it depowers her.

So, I wonder what happened to the Black Queen/Snowman in the trolls’ session? Nannasprite presents her lore as being applicable to all Sburb sessions across time and space, but that could be grandstanding. We know from gallowsCalibrator that Sburb has a ‘HYP3R FL3XIBL3 MYTHOLOGY’ (p.1524) so here’s a theory: what if the light and dark kingdoms were flipped in the trolls’ session? What if they were told that dark is always destined to lose, and charged with fighting on its side, and some vaguely similar yet different circumstances led to their causing the Black Queen to abdicate? The trolls seemingly can’t decide whether they want to help or hurt the kids, and this would explain it: according to Sburb mythology they’ve been positioned as enemies, but really they’re all just kids playing the game, and victims of Skaia’s will more than willing participants.

In another beautiful parallel, WQ gives PM a crown twice, 413 years apart. It’s presented here like closure, but there’s still a lot of missing story – presumably, PM has been to the battlefield, retrieved the king’s crown, protected the ring somewhere, delivered the crowns to Jack, and delivered the package to John. Knowing she was successful makes me wonder what we’re missing, and what twists might happen to subvert our ideas about how these events unfold.

And so just ten pages after its creation, we get an immediate payoff for the mailbox crown. Of course if the crown is intended for PM, then it should be made from a mailbox, the thing that has the most meaning to her and will guide the way she rules. I really love the symbolism here – the fact that being a monarch means nothing if your society is collapsed, and that if your goal is to make a new, functional society, royalty is not helpful. A figurehead only provides the illusion of a functioning society, but if you’re going to rebuild a planet, like these guys are, you need to begin with practical concerns. How do we live day to day? How do we get around? How do we communicate with each other? How do we solve internal disagreements? These are all things the exiles were concerned with before WQ showed up, and I love that that hasn’t changed.

[lizzybeth1986]

Liam and Olivia: When You Prefer The Side Character To The Main

Series - TRR's Alternative LIs: The Romances that Didn't Happen

Previous: A Brief History of Alternative Romances in Choices

A/N1: My apologies for the length of this one! There was a LOT to explore, and even more that I had cut out from my initial draft.

A/N2: This essay operates on the premise that Liam is not the "favoured LI"/"golden boy" of the team - an argument I have made in detail in other Liam-centric essays. I am not interested in arguing those same points in my comment box/reblogs. Visit the Liam section of my meta masterlist if you want to learn more about that.

CW: Mentions of non-consensual kissing. Mentions of the plot against the MC in TRR1. Very fleeting mention of the "infertility subplot" TRH pushed onto Hana.

(Screenshot from HIMEME's YouTube channel)

As I mentioned in the previous essay, TRR (along with ES, to a far smaller extent) was the only series that seemed to make an attempt to pair even their popular LIs with another character. It also was (along with TCaTF) one of the very few books that hinted at an alternative romance in the first book itself.

This section of the essay series will perhaps be the longest, since Liam x Olivia got the earliest hints, and was built up first. While the other three pairings were introduced or hinted at in Books 2 and 3, the reader got to see glimpses of a possible Liam x Olivia pairing from the finale of Book 1 onwards.

Why An Alternative LI?

TRR is, essentially, a story that hinges on the likelihood of an arranged marriage. The character that makes this entire story possible, Liam, is expected to pick a bride by the end of his social season, whether he is ready for marriage or not. The ending of Book 1 itself ties his ascension as a king to marriage.

(Screenshot from Skylia's YouTube channel)

To prove Madeleine's point, the finale actually shows us that until he picks a fiancèe, he literally won't be addressed as king, but still as Prince Liam. So while this point does get heavily retconned later on in the series, the original story itself required Liam to be married sooner than any of the other LIs.

But Liam's story doesn't just hinge on needing a good Queen for his kingdom. His arc - at least in Book 1 - involved learning that being a good king doesn't mean he needs to sacrifice his own desires or romantic sensibilities. If that were the case, he could have just been stuck with Madeleine. No - the story was supposed to be about Liam learning to validate his personal aspirations without hurting his political position. It was essential then that the woman he picked was someone he either was already in love with (the MC), or someone he grew to love over the course of the series.

When you take this context into account, having an alternative romance becomes not only convenient, but essential.

And if the MC doesn't choose Liam as her endgame...who better for this "romance" than an old friend who has always held a torch for him?

A Romantic Rival

(Screenshots from Skylia's YouTube channel)

As most of the fandom remembers the first book and the trajectory of the Liam and Olivia relationship in it pretty well, I'll try not to go into too much detail. The Olivia of Book 1 has two parallel storylines: the one with the MC, where they first start out hating and then learn to like each other...and the one with Liam, which begins with Olivia assuming she will win the social season, but becoming more and more resigned to the MC's chances of winning as her position in the competition declines.

There is obviously a lot more focus on her dynamic with the MC, for two reasons:

1. Until the MC chooses an endgame, an LI will never show more interest in another person. It will always be the alternative LI whose interest initially drives that side-story. Making an LI reciprocate that interest can result in a negative impression of them, as fans could potentially believe that their love for the MC is not genuine or special. This is the case for all LIs in the series, not just Liam.

2. Narratively, the first book wants to make Olivia's love for Liam their big character reveal. It is the first time Olivia actively opens up to the MC, and is canonically the beginning of their "friendship". So very little emphasis is placed on her emotional attachment to Liam until the Coronation (with her cactus gift and her confession to the MC before leaving), and even less on how Liam feels about her.

Whatever little we do get of Liam and Olivia's dynamic before the finale is focused on their childhood friendship. We learn from Liam that she was a sad, lonely child when they met, heartbroken by her parents' death and the negligence of the aunt who was supposed to raise her. Her attachment to Liam emerges from his support of her when they were children, and we later learn in TRH that he not only supported her, but often empathized with young Olivia and comforted her in ways that didn't give away her vulnerabilities.

Olivia claims at the beginning of TRR1 that "everyone just assumed Liam and [Olivia] would get married one day". Given what we learn later about Constantine and the Nevrakis family (and the fact that no one backs Olivia's claim at any point in the book), it is possible she was exaggerating. But it is also true that until the MC gains more popularity and Madeleine makes her entrance, Olivia is assumed to win the social season quite easily. In the same way that Madeleine is positioned as the "political" rival in Book 1's story, Olivia is viewed as the "romantic" counterpoint to the MC.

From Liam's end, there is actually very little shown about his thoughts on Olivia. It is clear that he cares for her, wants the MC to think well of her and understand her circumstances. While as a child, he comforted her when she was called a cactus by reminding her that they were tough plants that no one messed with; as an adult he is pained by her vindictiveness towards people who haven't even harmed her. There is plenty of grounds here for some sort of relationship, but enough there that shows why the MC who will marry him would be a slightly better fit.

The second half of TRR1 focuses on softening Olivia to an extent - having her and the MC optionally bond over their dislike for Madeleine (who is viewed as the "bigger bad" at this point) and having her only occasionally approach Liam for his company. Her feelings for him come to the forefront only during his Coronation, around the time she withdraws due to the blackmail exposing her parents' attempts to assassinate King Constantine.

This moment in the series completes Olivia's transition from antagonist to a possible friend. The reveal that Olivia loved Liam all along ensures that the MC can sympathize with her for not getting the man she loves, and allows the reader to envision her as a future ally.

To some who already vouched for a Liam-Olivia endgame before the finale, this moment was a confirmation. To others who didn't exactly see Olivia's actions towards Liam as rooted in affection, this moment was a revelation. Whatever it was, this moment made her extremely popular in the fandom.

But this scene also had a more important purpose - it provided players not interested in Liam, a possible out from the situation. The ending of TRR1 hinged on Liam choosing the MC as his future bride, then being forced to accept someone else when the scandal broke out. Book 2 allows the MC to explore what she wants without the expectations of a social season. The prospect of a titled lady who genuinely loved Liam being his potential endgame would make it easier for fans of other LIs. It sounded like a perfect ending for everyone.

The (Unwanted) Kiss, and What It Says About the Fandom

(Screenshots from Danni Stone's YouTube channel)

A scene that often gets ignored (or conveniently forgotten) when discussing Liam x Olivia in TRR1, is the kiss in Lythikos.

The Lythikos Ball in Ch 8 is already a social battleground of sorts for Olivia. She wields her power as hostess here - monopolising Prince Liam's company, and humiliating the MC and her friends with the worst seating and ice-cold food. Things come to a head when - while dancing the Cordonian Waltz with Liam - she forces a kiss on him, completely disregarding his ability to consent.

I use these precise words to describe this incident for two reasons. First, because canon refused to do so. Second, because most of the fandom refused to do so.

Different characters in the story respond to this incident in different ways. A shocked "what a bold play!", a sarcastic "Olivia's growing up, how sweet", and an enraged "she's gone mad with power here!" emerge from the ladies of the court - all focused on Olivia's intentions and actions. None of these responses ever address Liam's end of this situation.

Even more interesting are the options the MC is given to address the situation when Liam speaks to her later.

(Screenshots from Danni Stone's YouTube channel. This is the second dialogue option)

She either speaks to Liam like nothing happened, or engages in victim blaming. Personally I think both options are as bad as each other. Neither of these options include "are you okay?" or "were you comfortable with that?".

Liam's answer to the MC's (optional) accusations is perhaps the only time the issue of consent is even barely addressed (and even here Liam is duty-bound to think of Olivia's welfare over his own comfort). It is appalling that it takes the MC practically victim blaming this man for that to happen. And it is equally disturbing that Liam's response is so apologetic, so contrite, as if this entire situation was his fault.

The kiss is viewed as a number of things in the book: an affront to the suitors who have no power in Olivia's estate, or a political blunder. But what does it mean to the man who had this kiss forced upon him? Would he really feel comfortable or safe around her again after that? The writers clearly didn't know, nor did they care. And most of the fandom was only too happy to follow suit.

The few times this kiss was spoken about amongst the fandom, the question of consent was barely ever addressed. The kiss was either brushed aside as unimportant, seen as an indication of the "love and passion" Olivia had for Liam, or viewed as a manifestation of her jealousy towards the MC. Liam is sometimes seen as "clueless" for not "noticing Olivia's feelings...I mean, she literally kissed him!!" All of which could be true, but it doesn't erase the fact that his consent was never given, nor his comfort with the situation ever considered.

It is doubly ironic given the fandom reaction to the MC's plight in Applewood, after Tariq attempts to kiss her without her consent (though this situation involves significant privacy violations and dark conspiracies, and Liam's does not). The MC's situation was (rightfully) viewed as horrible and potentially traumatising, and many were upset that the emotional impact of it wasn't adequately addressed in the story. It wouldn't be surprising if Liam's situation wasn't viewed on the same level - given the difference in contexts - but the fandom and canon rarely saw this as something that happened to him, without his consent.

Ironically, the fandom never really considered Olivia planting a whole smacker on Liam's mouth as possible "proof" that she could engage in creepy, entitled behaviour...but they did often view Liam as "creepy" for...complimenting diamond-option outfits, or saying romantic-coded dialogues that the MC would reciprocate by default (again - I don't deny this is a problem and those lines should have been coded properly. However one cannot deny the doubt standards here). Olivia was the one who forced a kiss on the object of her affection in canon, but Liam was the one who got so many "abuser" and "harrasser" (and worse!) depictions in fanfic when TRR2 and 3 were out.

I will be addressing this particular scene again in another context, in a later essay in the series. I would like my readers here to not forget this scene, or the (lack of) outrage around it. It would be helpful to ponder over why Olivia's behaviour here is largely viewed as no big deal, especially when other side characters (and at least one main character) could be villainized for far, far less.

Olivia and Liam in TRR2 and 3

(Screenshots from Skylia's YouTube channel)

TRR1's finale and TRR2 show a small shift in Liam and Olivia's dynamic. Now that he is engaged, and in love with a woman who isn't Olivia, their interactions become sporadic and awkward. To ensure that Liam won't be viewed as a cassanova, the narrative keeps their interactions to a minimum. Group scenes that involve Liam often leave Olivia out, and group scenes that involve Olivia exclude Liam.

However, to address the "romantic potential" from TRR1's finale, the book shows Liam and Olivia interact in at least one scene in Ch 10. Here, they have a short, stilted conversation that leaves Liam concerned about Olivia's well-being, and that makes Olivia grieve over her unrequited love for him to an equally concerned MC.

Olivia's story in TRR2 largely centers around establishing her character (snarky, prickly, warriorlike. Much of this is actually a deviation from her writing in TRR1), strengthening her relationship with the MC, and integrating her into the core group.

Olivia's feelings for Liam get addressed again after the MC makes her final choice of LI. The MC's acceptance or rejection of Liam's proposal results in a bit of tension between the two women. If Liam is the MC's choice, Olivia admits to her heartbreak despite being truly happy that Liam has found love. If not, she reveals a slight resentment that the MC could so easily throw away the love that Olivia so badly wanted. The narrative allows Olivia her complicated, ambivalent feelings towards the Liam x MC match, and expects the MC to understand and sympathize. By default.

If you don't choose Liam in TRR3, his romance with Olivia does start here. And by this I mean that Liam is now allowed to reciprocate her affections.

(Screenshots from the Skylia YouTube channel (Drake playthrough). The screenshots aren't in order. 1st Liam x Olivia scene is the handholding at Applewood (5), 2nd is dancing at Vegas (1st two), 3rd is Liam asking Olivia for a dance at the finale ball (middle two), and the last is Liam asking Olivia out (6))

Even in the playthrough where Liam is marrying the MC, his default is to trust Olivia, show her kindness and staunchly defend her to people who suspect her motives. Liam advocates for her innocence in TRR3 Ch 2, even as her family becomes one of the prime suspects. The MC may vouch for her by choice...but if she does choose to suspect Olivia, it is Liam who pushes back against the idea.

By this point, the MC and Olivia can cement their friendship if the former has worked on gaining her trust. If not - the book has already created an inbuilt mechanism to ensure Olivia's loyalty anyway. It is tied to her gratitude and affection for Liam, the one person who consistently believed in her from childhood. Whether the MC makes an effort to win her approval or not, Olivia respects her. Her emotional attachment to Liam as an old friend, and loyalty to her king, ensures that her support is gained by default throughout.

Outside of his own playthrough, though, the narrative does slip in a few extra scenes where Liam shows an obvious romantic interest in Olivia. It's small - he isn't exactly yelling from the rooftops that he loves her - but it is definite progress where he seeks her out for support, dances with her and eventually asks her out to dinner at the finale. The scenes are few but prominent, and leave no doubt to the reader that Liam fully intends to court her.

So...why is Liam still single in the Drake, Hana and Maxwell playthroughs of TRH?

Writer Bias

When you read enough interviews and watch enough livestreams from the TRR team, one thing becomes very, very clear. They love their TCaTF callbacks. And no callback is more beloved to the writers than the repurposing of Zenobia Nevrakis' sprite to create her descendant, Olivia.

In this section, I will focus in particular on Kara Loo, COO of Pixelberry and one of the head writers of the TRR/H/F series. Going by several interviews and social media posts, Kara wrote most of Olivia and Drake's scenes and dialogues (along with "some of the Prince's speeches"), and was in fact the driving force behind how Olivia's character came to be, in the original series.

"...when we were creating Book 1, we wanted an evil redhead to be your antagonist, and Kara said, "Oh, what if we used Zenobia, but the twist is she's a Nevrakis descendant?"" - Jennifer Young, Looking Back on The Royal Romance (Sept 2018)

Kara has openly admitted before to having a fondness for Olivia's particular character type. In an interview with Daily Dahlia, she spoke of Val, one of the TCaTF LIs, in glowing terms that perfectly fit the way Olivia has been written as well:

"I love writing Val Greaves in The Crown & The Flame. I love writing for characters that are a little meaner and will really just say what they’re thinking, even if it isn’t exactly tactful." - Daily Dahlia's Interview with the Pixelberry Crew (Sept 2016).

The love for mean (and white! Don't forget white) women among the team, is pretty clear when you look at the kind of reception TRR's mean white women get.

Notably, Kara does have the occasional nice thing to say about Liam too. In an interview before the release of TRR2, she spoke of how "considerate and loving he is", how "there is nothing mean or selfish about him". As a Liam fan who kept seeing him bashed left and right after the TRR1 finale, those words initially felt like a massive relief.

But now, seeing the way the team treats nicer and more diplomacy-oriented characters in the series, this fulsome praise for Liam's selflessness gives me pause. It reminds me too much of how most of the team swore up and down that Hana would be their choice of LI to marry in a livestream, at the same time that they were slamming an infertility subplot on her in the books. Looking back with the knowledge of how the writers would treat Liam later, praise like this seemed less focused on finding him lovable, and more on ensuring that he gave constantly to the MC without ever getting much in return.

While Liam's treatment is not as bad as Hana or Kiara's, one must take note that the team - esp the head writers - have never really hesitated to throw Liam under the bus or retcon entire chapters and backstories to make characters like Drake seem better than him (eg. The narrative choice to have Drake claim Liam was leading the MC on when they first met in TRR3, which has led to more than one attempt to rewrite the bachelor party).

Part of this could be attributed to just the fondness for a specific character type. But I do think that with Kara in particular, ideology also plays a role in her preferences. There are at least two interviews from the team where her liking for darker, more violent storylines has been mentioned. In TRR3 the team affectionately called some of their brainstorming sessions with Kara as "Kara's trail of bodies" (one idea was to kill off Madeleine in Lythikos), and in the TRF livestream they mention that she initially wanted a war storyline.

This leaning towards a more militaristic mindset shows...in the care that Kara takes for Olivia's dialogues and especially her spy scenes (tho such scenes actually don't contribute much to the plot). In contrast there is a subtle disdain for the more diplomacy-minded characters shown in scenes where Olivia's ideologies are measured up against theirs (eg. Any scene where Hana and Olivia are supposed to work together, or the vast difference between the "valiant" Lythikos tournament and the "ridiculous" Castelserraillan flower competition in TRH3).

Even though it is often the diplomacy that saves the day at the end, the framing always highlights the militaristic way of thinking more positively. Given that Kara writes a lot of Olivia, and a fair amount of Liam, it's pretty obvious now where her (and the team's) particular bias may lie.

Because of this bias, it became far easier for TRR's writers to lean into popular fandom myths when it suited them, or pander to a particular section of the fandom. Which is the subject of my next section.

Fandom Entitlement

Olivia often has two types of fans - the ones who wanted to ship her with their MCs in canon (and couldn't), and the ones who wanted to be "bestieeeees!" with her. The frustration of the former was rooted in the fact that wlw had only one romantic option, but I will not be talking about them.

The latter were found in plenty among the Liam, Drake and Maxwell stans - all of whom either viewed her as an ally to win over (Liam), or as someone to push onto Liam, so they could romance the men they preferred in peace (mostly Drake and Maxwell. Some Hana stans but not as many).

As I'd mentioned in an earlier section, Olivia's final scene in TRR1 allowed people who didn't want to romance Liam, to envision a narrative 'out' for themselves. By the time Olivia reappeared in TRR2 Ch 5, she'd gained a cult following among many, many fans. A lot of them were actively rooting for the start of a romance between Liam and Olivia, and very few resented her for her feelings or begrudged her past actions.

But there was one downside. The intent among the majority who rooted for this pairing, was more about "getting Liam out of the way", than any actual romantic potential. Because of this, certain Liam x Olivia stans (ironically, the Drake romancers were the loudest voices in this group) felt a ridiculous level of entitlement towards this pairing.

A number of readers insisted on having Liam fall for Olivia immediately, wanted him to show feelings for her instantly, and complained when he didn't do so while his (optional) romance with the MC was still on.

Olivia's sad, longing gazes in TRR2 propelled many a reader to complain about what an awful situation poor Olivia was in and how insensitive and uncaring Liam was (even in the face of screenshots that clearly showed him worrying about her desolate mood). One of many examples comes from a post in Feb 2018 - a Drake stan's written walkthrough of TRR2 Ch 10, and ironically the following lines were made above a screenshot set that clearly showed Liam noticing how sad she was and worriedly asking the MC about that:

Liam finds you and as always, can’t help fawning over you. This time Olivia is right there and he is like, Oh yeah, Olivia, you are too here, hi. She definitely notices, gets upset, and leaves because she really does love him and she is third choice at best.

This was not the only one. There were multiple posts like these, and they often positioned Olivia as a figure of sympathy, yearning for a love that would never be hers. Liam in these readings was always positioned as someone who "didn't care" and later, "didn't deserve Olivia".

When he did start showing an interest in Olivia in Book 3, it went largely unnoticed by most of the fandom, even though he was romancing her in at least 3 out of 4 playthroughs. There were very, very few posts made about any of these romantic moments. Instead, from Chapters 3 to 10 of TRR3 - where Liam didn't show any indications of heartbreak re: the MC - certain Drake/Maxwell fans made posts complaining over his not pining over the MC, or theorizing that some of his friendly attempts to educate the MC about the country had to have been done with more than friendship in mind.

This section of the fandom often got insane amounts of pandering from the writers themselves. When TRR3 returned from a hiatus post Ch 9, we were suddenly hit with more scenes involving Liam's "heartbreak" (it featured sporadically in all three of the other playthroughs, but you could tell it was tailor-made for the Drake one because it got referenced there waaaay more) before the big battle with Anton. Fandom spoke far more on these scenes than on the ones they got for Liam x Olivia.

What was completely missed was that such "heartbreak" scenes happened because there was a demand from readers who weren't even Liam stans in the first place, and the same stans didn't hesitate to flip and label him "desparate" or "pining" or write fanfic where he was an absolute creep in response to a thing they asked for!

As for talk of the Liam x Olivia ship post TRR3, the phrase "sloppy seconds" started to be used often to address the pair after the series ended, and there were quite a few posts claiming that Liam didn't deserve such an incredible woman like Olivia.

(Edit Source: the playchoicesconfessions Tumblr blog)

Using the pining subplot that nonLiam stans had asked for, some of the same people would insist that Olivia "deserved better than to be sloppy seconds" (at some point after TRR3, I noticed that even some Liam stans would say the same!). This argument often came hand-in-hand with the lie that Liam never cared for Olivia enough (as one can see in the edit above). It also often hinged on the premise that the MC was Liam's first love, that he wouldn't (and shouldn't!) ever get over her, and that anyone else would rank as second best to him. And while I agree that Olivia deserves a partner who would wholeheartedly love her, this argument seemed to come from people who were eerily reluctant to imagine Liam leading a happy life without the MC.

Tbh, the fandom at large has always had a very confusing relationship with Liam as a character. I wouldn't be exaggerating if I said that from TRR2 onwards, making Liam a scapegoat was a very popular reading from the fandom. He was often expected to live up to impossible standards - way more than the other male LIs - and criticized incessantly for dialogues and action that the other two could easily get away with.

Many fans were (rightfully) frustrated by how Liam could have romantic lines by default (which the MC would by default reciprocate, to their chagrin) all through TRR1 - while ignoring romantic default dialogues from Drake - but also complained when Liam responded more calmly than expected to her rejection of his proposal. They also didn't like that he could be largely neutral/merely friendly towards the MC for most of TRR3. Damned if he didn't, damned if he did.

I'm not saying that this was the viewpoint of the entire fandom. There were people - yours truly included - who pushed back against such a biased view of this pairing. Against a view that insisted on centering only Olivia's feelings, while either badmouthing Liam for not returning her love, or ignoring the times when he did. There were people who pointed to canon for proof that he cared.

But enough voices vouched for this other, more unsavoury reading that "Olivia deserves better than to be Liam's sloppy seconds", that it became quite popular. That it became the accepted view in canon too, when the writers began work on TRH.

Olivia x Liam (not), TRH and Beyond

As we all know by now, Liam x Olivia did not happen in TRH. After a dance and an invitation to a date in the finale, Liam was back to being single and uninterested in any romantic relationships (like all the other LIs). It went to the point where he was ready to appoint the MC's future child as his heir (heir apparent, not presumptive. The fandom mockingly dubbed him "Rumpelstiltskin" for this). At the time, I imagined that perhaps the narrative was trying to erase the pair altogether, since no other LI got paired up either. It would be fair.

This wasn't exactly the case. In fact, in my opinion, what they managed to do was much worse.

(Screenshots from the HR Gameplay YouTube channel. Liam is renamed "Rayden" here)

Savannah's bachelorette (TRH1 Ch 7) has the MC and the ladies "address" certain pairings that were hinted at in TRR3. One doesn't get addressed at all, one addresses the LI by name only if the playthrough isn't the one where the MC is married to him.

Olivia's is the only one that got addressed regardless of whether the MC was married to the man she had wanted or not. And looking at the scene now, I really, really wish they didn't write it at all.

If the MC encourages Olivia to talk about her feelings for Liam, the latter shows anger and resentment over Liam not choosing her twice over. This, despite the fact that he did attempt to date her the previous book. This, despite the fact that he never indicated interest until he actually felt it. This... despite the fact that not returning the feelings of someone who likes you romantically is a normal, natural thing that said someone should accept without judging other person!

In fact, the fandom was more than willing to view other LIs "not returning feelings" as normal, natural and blameless...so why did only Olivia get sympathy and praise for her unrequited love, and why did only Liam have to be criticised for the same?? Even in THIS scene??

Liam x Olivia would not be referenced for 3-and-a-half books after this, until the very end of TRF. Over the course of the series, the team tested her compatibility and possible chemistry with at least two side characters. One was Jin, the Auvernese spy that Olivia fights with in TRH1 Ch 19. While they did seem to have some banter in the first book and a smattering of scenes in the second, interest quickly died down and Jin was written out of the story once the Auvernese royals' scandals were exposed.

TRH3 then hinted at Amalas x Olivia as a pair, peppering hints as early as the introductory chapters. There had been a few murmurings among the fandom for the same, since a number of wlw were fond of Olivia, and people liked headcanoning her as bi or lesbian (in fact, when the team claimed in a TRH1 livestream that having Olivia as an LI would "soften her" too much, the fandom protested). Amalas x Olivia was met with more approval than Jin x Olivia, and in TRF you could encourage Olivia to ask either Liam or Amalas for a dance.

Liam himself never got any other options for romance (understandable, none of the LIs did), and in fact had several aspects of his story chipped away, chunk by chunk, to benefit other characters. In the end, Liam is treated like Olivia's "alternative LI" than the other way around.

It was a pretty ironic ending for a pairing that people felt so entitled over in the beginning. After years of protests against Olivia being Liam's "sloppy seconds" just because he chose her after being rejected by their MCs... the narrative didn't mind treating him like some sort of "consolation prize" (one of two) for Olivia. And as expected, nor did the fandom.

Conclusion: Could This Pairing Have Worked?

Much as I dislike it now, I did think Liam x Olivia had some potential back then. Politically and emotionally, Liam and Olivia were opposites in many ways. There was a lot you could explore. Their background history and the sweetness of their childhood story had the potential to add layers to their dynamic.

But for a pair like Liam x Olivia to work, romantically, some things would need to change:

1. Respect in the writing room for both their ideologies, not just Olivia's. If you view one with adulation and the other with disdain, that will eventually show in the writing. These two could have been a solid power couple if the team could just set aside their boners for violence and knives once in a fucking while.

2. THE KISS. If you're going to have that kind of a scene around, especially in the context of TRR1's larger story, it needs to be addressed. From Liam's point of view. With Olivia openly regretting it and atoning for it, and Liam getting to choose how to handle that. It isn't just enough to assume they spoke offscreen, and then pretend the forced kiss never happened or that that violation meant nothing.

Olivia was wrong. Olivia crossed boundaries. Olivia disregarded Liam's consent. Liam was the victim here, not the person the MC should be shouting at - even by option.

If a romance should proceed between the two, that kiss deserves to be addressed with a lot of sensitivity and respect to Liam's own experience.

3. BALANCE! Between their perspectives, their viewpoints, their beliefs. Which would only be possible if you equally valued both characters.

4. Respect for Liam's feelings and his romantic choices, whatever they may be. Liam knows what he likes best. Him not returning Olivia's feelings is not a crime, nor does it make him any less of a caring person. Him falling in love a second time, seeing an old friend in a new light, should have been embraced as a concept.

Loving someone else deeply in the past shouldn't make his feelings for his second love any less genuine. But most of the fandom adopted such a way of viewing the Liam x Olivia relationship because it allowed them to pity Olivia and blame Liam (again) - and the team validated those sentiments out of excessive care for one character, and a lack of it for another.

Changes like these four would have definitely made for a better-written alternative romance. But given the kind of team and the fanbase TRR had, none of the changes I mention here would ever have a hope of becoming a reality. Olivia is too popular, too beloved to her writers and fandom, (and too white!) to be viewed with even this much of a critical eye. And tbh, once the fandom has marked a character (esp a character of colour - customizable or not) as a scapegoat, they would enjoy bashing them too much to stop. From then on, it would only be a matter of which excuse, which nitpick, which set of double standards, would work best.

Liam and Olivia had potential. And the narrative was able to get that story to the point where the two could at least have a first date. But team TRR squandered all its future possibilities in the mad rush to pander to a portion of their fandom, with a clear bias for the side character...and so we will never know how a more balanced portrayal would've looked like.

A/N3: I have quoted posts that have actually appeared on Tumblr, but without any identification marks. All of them are one among many such posts - either lost to digital decay or hard to find. I do not want to call out any of the individual posters - I want to make it clear that many of these posts are indicative of a fandom-wide problem. Do not try to find out, or harrass, these posters.

Next - Maxwell and Penelope: When You Like the Side Character So Much, You Gift Her A Shiny New LI

[final-destination-headcanons]

This isn’t really a headcanon; it’s an in‑depth analysis of Lewis Romero’s character because I’m really tired of the community having this poor opinion of him—although I will include some of my own headcanons as well.

I don’t really understand why Lewis is seen as a hyper‑masculine or even misogynistic person. While I certainly don’t justify the things he said after getting off the roller coaster, I think his character is vastly underrated, so I’ll go point by point.

Lewis is not hyper‑masculine. He isn’t afraid of expressing his masculinity, nor is he someone who’s insecure about the unknown—ignoring Lewis from the book (who does have all those terrible traits). Lewis is not the person the fandom usually paints him as: an “alpha male” or someone who’s aggressive toward characters like Wendy.

He doesn’t fit those characteristics. Throughout almost the entire movie we see him doing things that break the hyper‑masculinity stereotype. At the beginning he’s bubbly and energetic; we also see him being empathetic with Kevin and Wendy in the gym scene, when he says, “I don’t blame you, but it’s wrong.” Lewis doesn’t hide his feelings—he wears his heart on his sleeve, which directly contradicts that toxic‑masculinity image the fandom associates with him. (A character who really does embody those negative traits is Carter Horton.)

I think it’s often forgotten that Lewis is canonically friends with Ashley and Ashlyn, and we mostly see him surrounded by female friends. He even defends them against Frankie in the deleted scene (briefly in the background). Instead of imposing authority, he shows them respect, so this general fandom impression of him being “mean to girls—or to anyone in general” really bothers me. His ease at expressing emotions and his comfort doing so around all genders shows that he’s not afraid of appearing “feminine.” We see him dancing in front of everyone and behaving in ways that don’t fit the toxic‑masculinity stereotype the fandom insists he has; plus, Lewis himself isn’t afraid to talk openly about his emotions.

He behaves respectfully at Ashley and Ashlyn’s funeral and knows when to be explosive and when not to be—unlike other characters like the aforementioned Carter Horton.

I believe the idea of Lewis questioning his sexuality or even talking about it openly isn’t far��fetched. I don’t think he’d be ashamed to discuss it if that were the case. Personally, I consider Lewis bisexual with an inclination toward men—in other words, definitely achillean.

Now, a section explaining some of my old headcanons so they make more sense with this information:

I’m sure Lewis claims Kevin is his best friend, but Kevin doesn’t even consider him a friend.

Kevin never wanted to be his friend; Lewis just hung out with Kevin and Jason until he assumed they were already best friends.

The dynamic between Lewis and Kevin is debatable, but analyzing both characters, here’s my perspective: We don’t see Lewis with many male friends. I think Lewis has trouble maintaining friendships with guys, and that’s exactly what happened with Kevin. Lewis started talking to him so often that he just assumed they were friends—and kept pushing. Frankly, I believe Lewis considers Kevin a friend, but Kevin does not.

There are many parallels between Lewis and Kevin: phrases like “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” the fact that in the vision Kevin tries to save Lewis, that the thing that killed Kevin in the vision was triggered by Lewis’s death, and that Kevin indirectly caused Lewis’s death.

I consider their dynamic very unstable: Lewis talks a lot to Kevin, and Kevin simply doesn’t know how to get away from him. I think that’s just who Lewis is—his way of expressing himself, which complicates his social skills most of the time.

“When Lewis sees someone crying, he first laughs/mocks a bit, but once he realizes they’re actually crying, he really worries a lot. He’ll think it’s probably his fault since he’s aware he can be very rude sometimes.” I stand by this headcanon because Lewis knows when to be serious and when to be funny. __ btw some pics of Lewis and the ashes being canonically friends

Thank you! When people portray him as this violent jackass it kind of leaves a bad taste in my mouth and I think people know why. If you want a character to portray as an asshole jock, Carter is right there! I think Lewis, while he has his moments, is harmless; and this analysis is really good!

[tastylemonbread]

At long last, Library's bio is here! A plain text version is available under the cut.

The next god to receive a bio is being voted on now here!

Image 1:

[This one is divided into sections, kinda like a newspaper. The specific formatting isn't really relevant, and it's pretty plain anyway.

Library, #17

Domain over data, memory, and organization.

AKA The Librarian, The Archivist, The Cryptkeeper

[Next to this first section of text is a neat black and white drawing of Library's sigil, a simple symbol comprised of a 2x4 grid of eight rectangles forming a square. The borderlines of the square extend a little past the corners, and an extra line lays horizontal at the bottom of the symbol.]

(next section of text)

PRIMARY:

As old as written word, Library has sought to archive all written works, but expands their purview to include new technologies as they are invented. Though many may assume Library to be meek and nerdy, They can be quite a powerful force if they want to be, possessing abilities such as teleportation, mind reading, and spatial manipulation. It's rare to see these powers used outside of the Grand Library. Being arguably the god of information, they have quite a good understanding of the human mind, and can effortlessly transmit and receive thoughts as long as they have physical contact with the person. Even gazing into Library's odd shelf face is enough to get the mind racing, overclocked with too much miscellaneous information to process. Despite all this, Library is pretty incompetent when it comes to social interaction.

(next section of text)

DOMAIN:

Library holds domain over every written word, work of art, video, audio recording, line of code, punch card, receipt, label, stone carving, and anything else that may be used to store precious precious data. Though Library considers each of these (and more) to be fall under the umbrella of their domain, they do not have control over these. Rather, Library can simply feel when something like that is created, and a copy is set into Library's mind.

(next section of text)

REALM:

Like many other realms, the Grand Library is located on a plane of existence  parallel from standard Earth. The Grand Library does not appear to have a floor, walls, or a ceiling, instead contained within a hazy white void filled with neat rows of bookshelves. Despite there being no visible floor, one can walk around as if on solid ground. The rows of shelves go on past what the eye can see, and the place is so large that finding another visitor is incredibly rare. The only entrance and exit to the Grand Library is a set of very large fine oak double doors which connect to the lobby of the Bureau of Divine Intervention, which is the realm of another god that I won't elaborate on here. There are other ways to access the Grand Library, but those doors are the only permanent fixtures. A reception desk is by the entrance inside the Grand Library, at which Library is typically stationed. Since the Grand Library is so inconceivably large, a guide is always needed to find a specific book, and that guide is Library. They can take your hand and instantly zip you to where you need to be. The process is very disorienting, especially for mortals and those who don't regularly visit. Library can always sense where you are, and can always hear you ask for help so long as you are in the Grand Library.

(next section of text)

Relations with other gods:

good: monument, arts, drama, machine, health, hive

bad: flame, sea, war, death, rot, fear

(end of the first image)

Image 2:

[Standing in the center of the image is a tall, slim figure with one hand behind their back and the other raised to wave awkwardly. They are wearing a plain yellow raincoat that conceals most of their body, and brown gloves and boots. Their neck is long, curved, and round, made up of a thick tube of wires with a metal zip-tie keeping them in place. Their head is a cubic bookshelf, with the open side of the bookshelf acting as their face. The multicolored books within the shelf head are arranged in a way that resembles the static color bars of an old CRT TV. There are two more doodles of their head from two different angles, which are described in upcoming text so I'll leave it out here. Around the figure are bits of text that kinda correspond to various physical features of the god.]

(these are the bits of text:)

When walking, their head bobs like a bird.

head is actually a bookshelf, with four little shelves at the bottom. Library's sigil in burned into either side. On the back of their head is a little computer with some wires connected running seamlessly into the shelf.

Big weird hands. Also wires?

Seemingly normal raincoat with a reflective stripe. Nobody's ever actually seen what's under it.

in comparison to other humanoid gods, library is very lanky, standing at 7'3" (222 cm).

Leaves no footprints?

(end of the second image)

Image 3:

[This one has sentences and paragraphs placed around without much purpose. There was some empty space, so I copy + pasted the same doodle of Library laying on their stomach with their feet in the air, but I stretched out the doodles to make em look sillier.]

MISCELLANEOUS BITS:

Prayers, summons, and ceremonies are often answered with very verbose personal letters expressing gratitude, and rarely result in actual face-to-face communication.

Library has been spotted reorganizing human libraries and archives on Earth. They admit that this is a guilty pleasure of theirs, as they usually try not to get involved in mortal affairs otherwise.

All publicly available books in the grand library have been translated into a "universal script" which can be understood by absolutely anybody who is able to read in at least one language. Library is eager to teach people how to write universal script, but lessons are so long and dry that Library is still the only one who knows how to write that way.

Though Library's life is known to be well documented, they have taken efforts to seize all record of their past and politely refuses to share these records publicly.

The largest book in Library's head is actually a binder filled with articles, notes, photos, and other information about each of the gods. Library doesn't actually need to consult the binder, but they like to update it often.

Like many other gods, Library's voice is heard from a listener's POV as if it's just a voice in their own head. Library's "voice" varies depending on who hears it, but consensus seems to be that they speak gently, eloquently, and with a vaguely African accent.

Pulling on their wires isn't a good idea.

Though they appreciate Order's efforts to document and regulate godly affairs, Library finds it too much of a headache to navigate the Bureau of Divine Intervention, and tries to stay away from anything to do with it.

Miscellaneous books and scraps are always seen floating around the Grand Library, sliding into and out of shelves.

(end of third image)

This is the most I've had to describe, but lucky me, most of the images are just comprised of text. If there's any unexpected issues with this plain text version, please let me know. Even if it's just nitpicks, I'd love to hear it.

Thank you for reading/listening to my silly thing :^)

[rainbowolfe]

Random Fun Fact, In Massive Monster's Merch Section, there's a Goat T-Shirt that if you look closely has Shamura on there. Specifically you can see them on the Goat's robes. Not sure if that means anything, since Lamb's T-Shirt has Mini-bosses instead of Narinder. But it's kinda sus that we got two separate occasions where Shamura's seemingly connected to the Goat.

hmm hm.

I've never looked very hard at the Unholy Merch cause I think the "metal" art style is... ugly, but that is weird. It's commissioned artwork so its pretty up in the air if the meaning is intentional or not, but I'll proceed as if it is!

Knowing that Goat and Lamb are meant to be parallels [duality, Two sides of the same coin, etc], the meanings we can derive from the Lamb's shirt are going to mostly apply to the Goat's shirt too.

They're both wearing a sash—specifically a stole. These sashes represent their religion/beliefs and are typically made of silk. In denominations that have them, stoles are worn by priests, deacons, or bishops. In denominations that don't, they're worn by higher-ranked members of the church. Effectively, disciples. Those who have been anointed with consecrated oil. [eyeballs emoji]

Stoles that are embroidered/decorated are called "vesper stoles" and worn for special events of the same name. Vespers is a communal ritual of evening prayer that begins around sunset. In certain Roman rites, it would last the entire night.

What Haborym and Eligos are classified as in-game are "non-believers" (Aka skeptics), which distinguishes them from the cultists and the Bishops, who are classified as Heretics.

They're both the second boss for their respective realms. And, they're both "hybrids". Eligos is a frog-bat (and has ~things~ growing inside of her), while Haborym is an octopus-jellyfish mix. I think. Even still, he's very clearly two or three beings sewn together.

There's the implication that they weren't always Like This, but were turned into monsters solely for the sake of fighting for their cult leader.

The Lamb's sash has the basic pentagram on it associated with the Old Faith, while the Goat's sash has the crossed-out circle associated with Wrath and The One Who Waits.

What I'm hearing is that the Unholy Lamb is Heretic Red (who worships the Lamb) and that the Unholy Goat is Heretic White (who worships themselves/worldly pleasures). [These titles are from the kickstarter] What I'm also hearing is that this Lamb is associated with Anura and Anchordeep, while this Goat is solely associated with Silk Cradle.

When it comes to the comparison being made between Shamura and Eligos/Haborym, it seems like further reinforcement that Shamura is 2+ entities that have been combined into one thing. And that Shamura wasn't always this monstrous spider, but was turned into this using the blood of the Great Ones/a ritual involving it.

What stumps me is how Eligos and Haborym are representative of the worship of the Lamb. There's just not enough info available to deduce that. Were they previous lambs? Previous Red Crown vessels?

Also, this Goat is our (Narinder's? The Crown's?) enemy. And is likely the figure depicted in the bone sculpture. If not simply just part of that entity's group. The entity associated with doubled lifespans.

What's extra interesting is that Lamb's background is a half circle. This is most likely the half-moon symbol that is notably absent from the Bishop's lineup. The Unholy Lamb's colors are red and orange. Instead of a collar, their bell is attached to a beaded necklace.

This means the Unholy Lamb is the Heretic Lamb. (The beaded necklace and the way their sash is worn unevenly may also be implying the Heretic Lamb was also the Anchorite) Also known as the Ignoble Lamb.

The Unholy Goat's colors are magenta and white. Their background seems like it's calling on the funeral/ascension rituals. This Goat is also, notably, dead/undead. Their head is alllll bone. Their bell doesn't seem to be attached to anything at all.

The Lamb of Death, and the Goat of Conquest. Two sacrifices, one more into it than the other. The pinnacle of obedience, and the pinnacle of rebellion. Potentially both actively possessed by their respective deities.

//squints

Conquest's Goat addresses the God of Death. But Shamura addresses the Ignoble Lamb. (which means Shamura's initial death/near death experience was caused by/involved the Heretic Lamb)

Follower of Death -> Lamb of Death -> God of Death -> Death Death being the horseman, and the God being their vessel. Meaning a Lamb isn't necessarily always a vessel.

>therefore Conquest's God/Vessel would be the God of either Pestilence or Chaos. >therefore Conquest's Goat doesn't have a Crown of their own. But maybe had one. >Conquest's Goat killed the God of Death's four other siblings to prevent a prophecy. They lose this fight at the last boss lmao >The ignoble Lamb is also a Death God, considering they wear the Red Crown. They also stole/wield the Fanatic's Crown. >Alternatively, Conquest's Goat succeeded in their mission and killed the fifth boss, but the Crown then went to the Ignoble Lamb instead of being destroyed. Since the God of Death makes explicit reference to having a Lamb of their own.

The question that remains is if the Goat in the trailer is Conquest's Goat. A gentle maybe.

The Goat 2's Crown is Purple, but it contains pink inside of it. So it could just be a borked resurrection. Or Goat 1's ticket out of Purgatory/Hell was letting this funky-eyed nuisance pilot them like a mech. This Goat also wields an axe, so that makes them an apostate, which tracks with everything else so far.

hum.

Kinda sounds like the Goat's the Fanatic.

[the-kirbe-anon]

Infodump to me about Ink Sans please

HECK I'M SO SORRY I KEEP WAITING SO LONG FOR YOUR ASKS ILY

Ah yes! My fictional husband!

He's a fan-made version of Sans from Undertale! (Undertale is a game where you play as a human who falls underground in a world of monsters and you can choose to either free them from the underground by sparing everyone, or kill them all, or kill some. )

Basically, his lore is that he was from an AU that was unfinished, and he destroyed his own soul to escape the abandoned world, and then he got splashed with color and a paintbrush and he's considered the guardian of the AUs (there are so many Undertale AUs made by fans it's crazy).

See those rainbow heart things he's wearing? Since he's soulless, he basically has to drink those in order to feel emotions and function! (My doodle, as made obvious by Sploto doodling in his scarf) Also the fandom's AU production and creativity keeps him alive. He only really guards the AUs to stay alive and doesn't really see other characters as people.

I wanna make an AU where he has a redemption arc and he gets a new soul his motivations for protecting AUs becomes less selfish and he actually cares about others. Trying to make it a parallel to how when we come to Christ, we get new hearts and our motivations change from bad to good! I haven't actually started writing it yet but I do eventually want to! See @a-new-soul-ink-sans-au for more on that! (my sideblog for that specifically)

If you'd like more info on Ink Sans, @ comyet has a FAQ section that basically has everything on Ink Sans.

(I don't wanna actually tag her because I don't wish to be perceived)

[wpmz]

deltarune chapter 3 initial thoughts!

major spoilers under cut! obviously!

doing a little post to try and collect my thoughts right after finishing chapter 3 for the first time.

i guess first off- it was SO different from how i was expecting, but also SO good. basically my only 3 hopes/expectations going in were: A) i hope there's at least one surprising lore reveal B) i hope there's a character i can really get obsessed with and C) i hope it's fun :] and BOY HOWDY were those expectations met lmao

i guess the thing i wasn't expecting the most (well. besides the one Big reveal lmao) was the structure of it? i was far more expecting something along the lines of chapter 2 i guess, with toriel as like a tag along character and a relatively linear area layout, but it turns out pretty much neither of those things were true??

the minigame/tv show sections with tenna were SO fun. honestly i feel like i can't talk about those without talking about how much i loved tenna as a character, so first of all: OH MY GOD I LOVE TENNA. he's ridiculous and over the top which is basically all i hoped he would be if he were the sort of gameshow host type that it was looking like he was. his speech quirk thing with the word art is so very good. and honestly i think part of the reason i like him so much is bc i started out the chapter trying to do character voices and he was Very fun to read dialogue for lmao. i also love his whole thing of like. being afraid of being abandoned bc no one watches tv anymore. and all the spamton references oh my goodness. i already said this in a liveblog somewhere but i was really expecting maybe a couple lines vaguely referencing spamton, and there was SO MUCH more than that (at least in my playthrough. no idea how/if it differs if you haven't beaten him in chapter 2).

i feel like i got off track. the minigame like zelda-esque sections were so fun i really liked doing the puzzles and that part where the fun gang all swapped controllers and the part where you get the raft and can go out into the ocean and find secret stuff lmao.

the enemies were also pretty alright, a lot of them were hard but i'm hoping i'll get better at them when i inevitably end up replaying these chapters a couple times. standout for me is Obviously shuttah, its design is bangerrrrrr and its bullet patterns with the freeze/unfreeze type parts and its act things with the photo taking minigame were my favorite new battle mechanic.

i am kinda sad that the secret boss seems very secret this chapter, no idea where they were besides maybe the s-rank rooms or something to do with the minigame sections? i think i saw "shadow mantle" on like the loading screen of the very first one and there was stuff out of bounds that i didnt know how to get to thats gotta be something right? (please don't spoil me on if its either of those i kinda wanna replay and see if i can figure it out myself lol)

tenna's boss battle was alright too, not the most fun boss fight to me bc i think that title still goes to giga queen but i liked the minigame rush thing at the end that was pretty cool

oh my god wait i forgot to talk about lanino and elnina and rouxls. possibly top ten best/funniest sections in all of deltarune to me i love rouxls' loser polyamorous-and-bisexual-but-no-one-wants-him swag i was dying laughing at their interactions. also veryyyy intrigued by the possible asgore/toriel parallels with elnina and lanino especially since they ended up together by the end? but then again who would be the awkward third to bring them together...? rudy? ...sans??

also fascinated by the little bit of darkner lore we got. like the ones who were supposed to be from this dark fountain turning to stone? idk if i understood that fully im gonna be honest. is it because they didn't fit in with the tv theme, or because tenna didn't want them there, or both? or was it something else, like because dess/the knight showed up at the end and she like... brought more darkness in and that made them turn?? idk

speaking of knight dess. KNIGHT DESS??????????? i was not prepared. it was never a theory i put thaaaat much thought into simply because it felt like a scenario where it only made sense because there wasn't that much known about dess but like. i guess that worked out lmao! happy for anyone who was heavy dess knight believing before this u guys earned it. i did have a thought like. a few weeks before the new chapter's release where i was like. maybe gaster is opening the fountains in order to make us fulfill the prophecy and that way you don't have to worry about who could've had access to those rooms to make the fountain bc he's in the depths or outside time and space or whatever. and i had another thought off of that that was like well it could also be dess for the exact same reason. but like. I DIDNT EXPECT IT TO BE TRUE?? im like. still reeling from this. knight dess real. ALSO SHE HAS GASTER HOLE HANDS. IS GASTER HOLE HANDS ACTUALLY REAL AND NOT JUST FANON CUZ IF IT IS I'LL LOSE MY SHIT.

idk i think that's most of what i have to say as far as initial reactions go (outside of all my live reacting i did today as well lmao). crazy that toriel just slept through all of that she must sleep like a rock goddamn

will prob take a break before doing chapter 4 tomorrow bc it's getting kinda late and also i wanna see if i can draw some of the new stuff :3 shuttah im coming for you you Will get drawn....

[genericpuff]

i know you said if you never mentioned a webtoon you either don't read it or don't have a strong opinion so sorry beforehand if this ask might be annoying, but im just curious if you have any opinion on remarried empress, specifically the whole uhhh extremely villified woman who happens to be a slave. its not the exact same as minthe but i do always see the parallels between them since both are oppressed and 'lower-class' women in opposition to the mary sue protagonist and the fans are just very classist when insulting them ('she doesn't know her place' etc etc) i kinda see RE as the korean version of LO coz they're both so popular and annoyingly everywhere/overhyped (tho i have to admit RE has better consistency with art and story). But i have a greater distaste for RE mostly coz the fans keep showing up in other webtoons comment sections lol

yeeeah the remarried empress is literally one of those exact webtoons that fits that category of "stuff I know is shit so I'm not gonna bother" LMAO I'm not a huge fan of royal family type dramas anyways, the genre just ain't for me (or I haven't found one that's connected with me yet) but I'm definitely not interested in reading a royal family drama that I know from the start I won't enjoy due to its writing LOL (I can appreciate why people like the ones that are written well though, again, a lot of them just aren't for me)

that said, there's a lot to support the theory that Rachel is trying to do some "royal family drama" thing with LO (especially with some of the language in the comic, like how Ares and Apollo will go off about Persephone's "pedigree"??? which is just such royal family "pure bloodline" eugenics crap tbh), but she's failing at it immensely because 1.) she's not good at writing drama, let alone royal family drama, and 2.) a lot of royal family dramas on Webtoons these days are also garbage so whatever she's taking inspiration from probably isn't high quality to begin with ( ；｀ヘ´) Hades and Persephone definitely reek of "rich and powerful white couple who use their power to abuse the lower class" and they don't even have the benefit of having interesting character arcs, they're just boring and mean.

[thryth-gaming]

Representation within and beyond Me

This is familiar territory for me.

This thread by Gail Simone is great one that goes into the differences between allegory and direct representation.

Allegory is a pretty strong tool for creating a way to make one story or character appeal to a wide variety of people from different life experiences because the story represents some form of common ground between those grounds. She points to the way the X-Men have been a variably effective allegory appealing to a variety of marginalized populations.

Which is great.

I remember that the last time I got excited about a D&D race was when I read the section on Yuan-ti in Volo's Guide to Monsters. There's a section about the psychology which tried to explain why the yuan-ti were so evil. However, a lot of their justifications were relatable life-experiences and I realized at some point that if you removed the "and this makes them evil" that was appended to most of these bits... the yuan-ti were very much neurodivergent coded.

It came with that mixed bag of their neurodivergence being used to explain why they became evil. But still, here was a playable ancestry that I had found some serious personal overlap with. And in the nine to ten years since the release of that book in 2016 I've played a large number of yuan-ti and each of them was neurodivergent and somewhere on the ace/demi sexual spectrum.

Heck once you add in the way the yuan-ti's primary culture feels very fascist and very eugencist, with some strong parallels to corporate ladder-climbing in the way yuan-ti and their gods devour each other to move up, and the way the culture outright lies about the origins of species (granted that's a revelation only as recent as Candlekeep) then it becomes even more relatable to my position as part of white America growing and seeing layer after layer pulled back from the propaganda of our culture to the rot underneath.

Zihu Asutali, a yuan-ti celestial warlock trying to escape her oppressive culture.

Caress Melani, an ace paladin in service to a benevolent goddess associated with sex and sex-work (Sharess).

Proper Ruin, an artificer from Tal'dorei who had the good fortune to never need to mask.

None of this relatability was deliberate on the part of WotC. Like I said, they were trying to use some typically neurodivergent psychological traits as an explanation for why they are pre-disposed to evil. And the yuan-ti, or at least the Serpent Kingdoms specifically, are still dipped in an aesthetic that is a problematic mix of Southeast Asia and Central/South American as a shorthand for exotic evil cult. So I don't think they quite realized how much the Serpent Kingdoms' brand of evil follows American corporate/nationalist ideology.

This was a suspicion that was confirmed when Monsters of the Multiverse came out with a new version of yuan-ti with all the neurodivergence replaced by a bland statement of "they can be good or evil" and a picture that is admittedly neat but also very European with blonde hair and a hooded tunic with brooch that looks more Celtic or Nordic.

As soon as they decided they'd allow for yuanti to be good, they were immediately set to Euronormative and neurotypical. It was such a huge lost opportunity.

It was just such a disheartening confirmation that they linked all the neurodivergence they described to an inability to comprehend morality. A similar occurrence happened when I got ready to play Zihu and started gushing over the coming challenges of roleplaying a character without what humans considered "normal" emotions. And the GM, very much trying to help, suggested "what if your patron fixed you and gave you emotions." And boy did I deflate fast and very politely said "okay... I guess" or something to that effect.

I've rambled on this on my YouTube channel in the past with a bit moreof the publication history of the Yuan-ti included.

Likewise, there's all sorts of these unintentional allegories in my writing and even game design. The Changeling playbook was an allegory for struggling with realizing my own neurodivergence long before consciously admitted to myself that I was neurodivergent instead of using language like "substandard genius" or "broken" as I had in my youth to explain why I was consistently intelligent but still could not get a handle on how I was meant to act.

The situation of the Community and supernaturals in general from Divine Blood is the same. Most of them are able to pass as human, but they aren't. And there's nothing predatory or dangerous about them any more than there's danger in normal people, they are normal people. They're just not human and often process thoughts in very different ways. And the very fact that there should be nothing wrong with just being who they are upfront and public... but instead they kept secret and some were born outside the Community such that they grew up without knowing what they really were.

Since the personal revelation of being both asexual/aromantic and neurodivergent it's had some impact on my writing. I've been struggling to find a way to re-approach Divine Blood (and finally write a second novel) with this knowledge now conscious in the forefront. But it really helped me polish the Changeling into the version that reached Slayer's Survival Kit. I also deliberately drew on my experience as an expat for The Visitor and my self-esteem issues for The Forged.

The realization of my own writings and creations was immense. But the thing with the yuan-ti made me realize how easily a company can first draw me in and then alienate me. The key element here being that WotC didn't know the impression they were giving with the yuan-ti originally and thus when they answered our requests for people to no longer be depicted as inherently evil, they had no problem dumping that unintentional neurodivergent representation in the trash.

By comparison learning that Kim Howell, aka Parse, of Sentinels of Multiverse was canonically autistic was a much sharper emotion than than than my still strong attachment and identification with yuan-ti. This wasn't an accident. Parse was specifically noted as being autistic. The company wasn't going to rug pull me the way WotC had, because that depiction was intentional.

In addition, Parse is also like me in the way that she's got a belly and isn't the typical perfect physical ideal that superheroes lean into. Granted, she's very clearly in shape, which I'm very much not. Still it's great to know that there's this chunky lady out there in that universe as one of the more dangerous supers in the setting.

Another pitfall that Greater Than Games avoided with Parse is that they avoided making her autism the source of her superpower. Parse has a supernatural ability to analyze things down to a metaphysical level. It's very much the sort of thing a lot of well-meaning writers would imply as autism=superpower. But instead, she has an origin story very much separate from her status as an autistic person.

She'd been part of a project analyzing the programming of a rogue AI robot which had unknowingly been altered by cosmic energies. A burst of that cosmic energy carried through the programs is what altered her perceptions to the point of prophecy combined with truesight. Her powers are cosmic... not autistic.

So, I dearly love Parse. She's amazing and I'm desperately hoping she's part of the Disparation supplement for the Definitive Edition of the game... because right now GTG has stopped producing new projects due to the tariff situation. If not, I still have the older edition of the game in digital form.

Which brings me to another point in the same thread above where Gail makes another comment.

My stories tend to be a bit diverse with main characters often being very different myself and with very different life-experiences. from my own and I am dreadfully terrified that have dreadfully misrepresented some group. Especially on the characters I most love. Am I representing Lucretia's trauma properly in Bystander? Is Hel's disability representation appropriate in Divine Blood? There are certainly several origins that I would not have created if I was creating the characters today.

I don't have too much to say on this for the simple fact that my writing has not reached very far and I haven't heard much beyond my immediate circles. So I can only speak in generalities and paranoia.

I'd love to hire a sensitivity or cultural consultant. I got to work with James Mendez Hodes on Hunter's Journal and Slayer's Survival Kit in the last couple of years, and it is something I recommend to anybody. He pointed out several places where I had made an assumption that was limiting or had an implication that was not intended and he really helped me through that... especially with The Forged and The Visitor.

However... that was part of a project funded by Evil Hat. I live pretty much paycheck to paycheck with what seems to be an ever growing debt said paycheck has issues keeping up with. This has kept consultants and editors just out of reach of my wallet and this rankles at me (there are currently maybe three short novels waiting for me get the money for a professional editor).

In all honesty, I'm unlikely to ever find out. I don't have much reach. I'd be surprised if even a thousand people had read my original works. But that doesn't matter so much to me. I want to have added something good into the world and I don't want to cause even theoretical harm.

What I can say is that if I am ever lucky enough for someone to stumble on one of my books and opt to make it into some sort of 1-season and cancelled acclaimed and popular Netflix series, and I had any sort of control, then I would not be the main author on the project. Same if they were to get taken up for a comic adaptation or something similar.

I'd ask for writers of culture appropriate to the characters to be found and do stuff with my ideas that give more complete representation. I'm perfectly happy to be in the credits under "based on an idea by...".

Might as well add links to my stuff. I need to make myself market more.

My Itch store-front

My Archive of Our Own page

My Patreon for reading unreleased drafts

Both my Patreon and my AO3 have some of my unreleased first drafts on them. More on Patreon. The Patreon posts do require a membership, but only a free one.

I'm really bad at self-marketing.

[aotopmha]

Out of all of the elements of Ultima Thule, I feel like the tribes are the least talked about.

I think with fairly good reason – at its core Ultima Thule is about the journeys our main cast has been on.

But I love them just as much because they bring together some very long-standing threads.

In essence all three tribes had their reasons for succumbing to despair:

The dragons were broken by the suffering brought upon them and their planet by the Omicrons. Their despair came from war and oppression.

The singular purpose of the Ea was to seek more knowledge, but they learned time is finite, so to them, what they pursued became meaningless. Their despair came from their work not being eternal.

The Omicrons pursued their wish to become powerful because they were weak once. Their despair came from becoming so powerful, they had no equal.

The Ea are the new group here, serving as parallels to Y'Shtola and Urianger, and they're actually the odd one out here, having no prior history to Ultima Thule, so I'm going to mostly focus on the dragons and the Omicrons.

But to sum it up, Y'Shtola's answer to the Ea is simple: despite time being finite, any truths learned can be seen from different angles and people can reach their own conclusions about them.

For example, even if everything disappears one day, and new knowledge is finite just as the universe, as long as we exist, the knowledge we have has meaning and value to those who come after us.

It's the time we do have left that matters.

Or perhaps even if knowledge and time are finite, a pursuit to extend the life of the universe could be possible.

Or perhaps, if knowledge is finite, we could find happiness in some other pursuit.

The Ea, along with all of the other tribes and Meteion herself, see their perspective as absolute. And in a neat way, this also extends to Hermes.

Along with having very specific beliefs, they've been effected by what they've gone through so strongly, they can't see any other way of looking at their situation and thus no new purpose to find.

In that sense, Y'Shtola's answer leans on what I think is probably the best part of her character: getting straight to the point when it matters.

But the Omicrons and the dragons are the true cool part to me.

Midgardsomr's connection with Hydaelyn and his respect for her has been established since he was introduced, we just never went into detail with it.

And this explains it all: so much of the universe is dead and Midgardsomr saw that emptiness during his journey to Etheirys.

We will probably find life in the cosmic exploration content in Dawntrail, but Etheirys will remain special because of the strength and concentration of it.

Life is a miracle, so it must be protected.

So, Estinien's answer comes down to self-pity not saving anyone. There will always be conflict and more often than not peace will be won with fighting.

And Midgardsomr is proof that however difficult the path to it, resillience will lead to true survival and happiness.

It's bringing together the Midgardsomr plot thread, which has existed since A Realm Reborn, Heavensward and Endwalker itself in one swoop. I love it.

I think I love the Omicrons the most, though because their section gives so much more meaning to an entire raid series.

And I think this is one part of the story that absolutely was planned out.

What Omega says when Alpha is running across space is super specific. It's the mention of Ser that gets me every time because first time through the most you get from that section is that it's a log of Omega's own journey to Etheirys.

But when you add everything together, it gets layers.

To me Alpha has always represented Omega's own soul along with how he views feelings.

Something pointless to ultimately be discarded because it "serves no purpose", but because it is a source of strength, he wants to logic it out.

His testing, and the soul that Alpha represents became so cool to me – essentially Omega, for the first time, had his perspective as an omicron challenged when Alpha wasn't rejected by anyone else and valued for his participation.

The final boss of Omega having the WoL's theme in it was always super cool, but it is even cooler to realise how they're foils knowing what dynamis represents and how we can use it.

It's the most literal logic vs feelings fight ever thematically.

And in the Ultimate he finally stops disregarding Alpha, instead joining his strength with his.

And equally, G'raha's answer to Sir leans on this. If you have no purpose, you can always try look for a new one because you change every single moment you live and never stop.

So the Omicrons can look for purpose beyond war.

And the "waste of time" that is everything else, perhaps isn't a waste, but simply part of a more fulfilling life.

And to once again, bring it all together with Endwalker, I think they also represent a potential endpoint for the Garleans and a parallel to the Allagans.

All a source of pointless, wanton destruction because of a single-minded pursuit of power.

And ultimately left without purpose.

There is actually another strong perspective within UT.

Meteion's.

The key part with her is that by taking all of these negative feelings into herself, along with finding dead worlds by themselves, she also unintentionally doomed some of them.

So along with fearing to disappoint Hermes and facing all of those negative feelings from the different worlds, she also has massive amounts of guilt built up within, so her journey is a neverending cycle that keeps hurting her and the worlds around her.

And it all began with her basically having no choice on the matter because of her nature and Hermes pushing her into it all despite knowing and feeling how wrong it was.

I think she's probably the most tragic of the characters because she is in the most literal sense an empath child.

Ultima Thule is just so wonderfully thematically substantial to me. It ties together the general main cast and themes of all expansions with strongly-defined perspectives for all of them.

I say those who wanted everyone to die at the end of this can suck it.

Absolutely would be a betrayal considering the thematic focus of finding purpose and happiness after much pain.