#and for some reason this movie got SO HYPED despite the first one (which also got insane hyped in 2009) being mediocre

[cuchufletapl]

Not sorry for being a hater but what do you wanna bet that the Blue People Avatar movie is doing so well in the box office thanks in part to the fact that tickets for 3D viewings are significantly more expensive

[blueikeproductions]

So we’ve established the modern idea for Transformers leadership is some combination of the Primes and a Council.

But what I forgot to mention last time was IDW’s stab at both ideas.

I think we all forget IDW’s era of Transformers was around for longer than we remember. It started around the time of Animated and the first Bay movie, ending with Cyberverse and Bee.

As such, IDW went through a lot of growing pains as Hasbro started modifying the brand into what we know today.

Furman kicked things off, with his story revolving around a modified version of his own Prime lineage, with Prime Nova, now Nova Prime, as a central antagonist for much of the run.

As time went on, Hasbro had started to reshuffle the Prime concept after RotF brought the ancient Primes to general audiences, ushering in the the modern version of the group that included Solus, Quintus and so forth. The main line books hadn’t included ancient Primes yet, so the book could slide them in fairly easily, but as usual there was a catch.

It’s pretty apparent Roberts didn’t want to be saddled with the Primes, as his MTMTE series largely went out of its way to ignore them. Instead, he had his own vision for the legendary original Transformers in the Guiding Hand.

13 robots whittled down to five, they represented the three core components of a Transformer: the Spark (life in Primus and death in Mortilus), the Brain Module (wisdom and knowledge in in Solomus and Epestimus) and the Transformation Cog (Adaptus).

These five would shape creation myths on Cybertron, and hence the group’s name, would guide the early Transformer race, part of which were members of their own group, the legendary Knights of Cybertron.

Don’t get too excited about these guys, despite the book hyping them up as being as important, if not more than the Hand or Primes as this benevolent group who led Cybertron to prosperity until they tried to spread their philosophy to the stars, they were basically normal, religious, space explores who got fatally sick from being in “too much contact” with organic species and were euthanized.

I really do think Roberts hated most things about Transformers, from being very dismissive to the human component (despite writing the Transformers as sitcom humans), the unusual lack of Transforming to the point it was a running gag, and trying to erase the mysticism Transformers has had since the 80’s movie.

See the Guiding Hand do represent this mysticism to a degree, right down to legend saying the death of Mortilius is the reason Transformers have millennia long life spans, but in actuality it’s all a sham.

Like the Primes, the Guiding Hand was undone by infighting. Legends claimed the death god Mortilius was the one to start the first wars on Cybertron.

However, the Guiding Hand turned out to not only be real, but the legends were all wrong. It was the ambitious Amalgamous Prime stand in Adaptus that betrayed his brothers, wanting war purely so the Transformers wouldn’t stagnate in peace time, and gradually evolve from the coming conflicts so that they may ascend as organics do to higher plains of existence.

These were the true forms of the Hand, just simply ordinary Transformers, with the unassuming psychiatrist Rung actually being the first ever Transformer born on Cybertron: Primus.

Adaptus and Solomus, now Tyrest, would serve as series antagonists, with Epestimus being retconned into being the ancient Magic 8 Ball artifact The Magnificence the early IDW Furman run used. Mortilius was actually a nice guy, though he still did observe death, being a sort of mortician chronicling the death of individual Transformers, but also having the means to save others thought lost to history.

Like the Primes, all of the Hand ultimately died for the Transformers species to move on to other things.

The group doesn’t appear to be that popular, with Rung being Primus met with a particular revulsion, as the Lord of Light was whittled down to a nerdy, forgettable twig boy that had some healing factor powers. Rung did have the ability to create the Matrix in his unusual “ornament” mode, but perhaps to add to the annoyance, he could build multiple versions of the Matrix, further reducing the mysticism. Like can you imagine TFONE doing this? Oh Sentinel couldn’t get the Matrix, because he accidentally destroyed it when he shot Zeta? No big! He can just force Rung to pop out a brand new one! Yeah it just doesn’t work.

Rung being Primus or the first Transformer tends to be ignored, and so far he’s the only one of his group to make the leap to other media, where he’s usually just treated as a field medic like Ratchet. His alternate form is instead a weaponized medical device rather than a Matrix Maker.

Rung is so far the only one to get a toy, but general audiences and kids weren’t terribly interested, his WFC toy clogged Ollies for the longest time.

Rung would get a surprise return in Japanese media, as the leader of a group of human made Transformers called Selectors, who were powered by the mysterious Angolmois Energy deposits found on Earth. Unhappy with his people’s lot in life, being a (somewhat unintentional) servant class for humans, Rung turned to the Decepticons to start an uprising against humanity, fracturing the unified Cybertron brought about in G2.

When the Quintessons interfered, corrupting several Selectors into their servitude using the chaotic power of Angolmois Energy and later observing Spike Witwicky admit to mistakes and declare his love of the Selectors as friends and fellow people, Rung realized his mistake and helped humans and Autobots fight back with the power of true “Good” Angolmois Energy.

Notably the manga references a dirty joke from Rung’s appearance in Earth Wars…

Where a now Autobot X Spike uses Rung’s weapon mode against a Quintesson in a … much deserved but still painful way.

The battle ultimately saw the Angolmois Energy too dangerous to use, as humanity rightfully feared the power would react to the evil in all human hearts, so humans and Selectors, now cool with each other, evacuated Earth for greener pastures, setting the scene for Beast Wars II’s Angolmois plot with Galvatron. Spike wasn’t too concerned about the Selector’s still being fueled by Angolmois, as they proved they can work together in peace, which feels a bit contradictory, but whatever, Rung and Spike seem happy.

The similarities the Guiding Hand had to the Primes would see a couple of them be regarded as actual Primes in IDW 2, but otherwise the group has largely been ignored after IDW ended.

As for the Thirteen Primes, they came off as an afterthought in the original IDW comics. I’m not sure if Furman had any immediate plans for Prima, Liege Maximo, Maccadam and others he had a hand in creating, but that ultimately fell John Barber and Mairghread Scott to fill in some blanks. The Thirteen were not demigods but instead simply the leaders of various tribes of the discombobulated Transformers race after Adaptus’ so called God War. A time displaced Shockwave created a time paradox where the Primes only formed due to Shockers’ awareness of the future. Killing Onyx and assuming his identity, Shockwave kicked things off by making Megatronus his student, ushering in the era of the Primes. This also saw the eventual rise of the corrupt Prime lineage Nova Prime, Sentinel Prime, Nominus Prime and Zeta Prime would go on to define.

So why are the Primes so clumsily implemented here? Two reasons: the reintegration of the Primes via TFP came much later into IDW’s run, where like most series up until that point, IDW was mostly content to ignore the concept of a group of ancient prototypical Transformers. The other I believe boils down to IDW wanting its own unique creation myth, but because of Hasbro wanting to enforce the updated Prime mythology, they had to included it whether they wanted to or not. I think this is also why MTMTE feels more like its own thing divorced from what the rest of IDW was doing, as Roberts seems to have had more freedom to do what he wanted, using his old fan fics as a basis. Ergo the creation myth of the Guiding Hand persisted over the Thirteen Primes here, although the rebooted IDW2 would more organically implement the Primes as the first Transformers, with some of the Hand in their ranks, but still treat them as myths and legends vs most media showing the Transformers being fully aware they existed, with older Bots having even worked alongside them, like Starscream’s High Guard in TFONE.

As for a Council, that was the awkwardly implemented Functionist Council, which would later give way to the oppressive Senate. Both were exaggerated versions of the Caste System (Transformers can only have work and benefits based on what they turn into) from Aligned with the simpler Cog and Cogless concept succeeding it in TFONE. In one timeline, the Functionist Council evolved into an oppressive dictatorship worse than the Senate, who casually enforced the deaths, or “Mass Recalls” of Transformers whose alternate forms no longer served a purpose to them on a whim like spaceship Transformers or cassettes/data sticks. Think that obsolescence episode of the Twilight Zone, but cranked up to 11. While the original Functionists died off in the Great War, their fingers in the pie of the Senate beforehand, their alternate versions were the final antagonists of MTMTE while the main books fought Unicron. The cog headed nitwits had managed to Transform their Cybertron into a more traditional looking Primus to cleanse all universes of non Transformer life, but were stopped and killed by Rodimus and Autobot Megatron’s group.

These clockwork bean counters don’t appear to Transform, but apparently these Skeksis wannabes can Combine to form The Key to Vector Sigma. Like most of Roberts’ stuff, we never actually see them do this, and it would appear they found a way to access Vector Sigma without needing to Transform to do so. I understand this is probably intentional to make them hypocrites, but even so… I would think maybe just having them be cars, spaceships and other things that were recalled might be more appropriate.

Some earlier ideas that were kicked around to make these IDW concepts a bit closer to older creation material would’ve seen the Knights of Cybertron have ties to the Quintessons, and Rung channel his inner Ultraman to fight Unicron. The later was recycled for alternate Rung to fight a super weapon of the Functionists, but that resulted in Rung both dying, and further abusing concepts like Mass Shifting, making the Transformers more broken and oddly overpowered which annoyed fans.

For now, the concept of the Guiding Hand and Functionists as alternate creation myths and governing bodies seems to be utterly ignored in favor of doubling down more on the Primes. Rung is the only one to make it into toy form, and other non IDW media, but he along with many other IDW originals appear to be benched for the time being. While Skybound can use whoever they like, so far they seem mostly content to stick to the G1 cartoon cast and the occasional OC like Starscream’s friend Genvo. I don’t really see Rung having a role here anyway, and frankly he’d probably just get shot in the head and stay dead if he did appear considering the violent struggles of the Autobots here…

Funny enough I could see Rung as a Miner class robot in TFONE, he fits the aesthetic, but so far no. I feel like he’d probably just be a car or bike to stream line things if he did appear though.

[1anxiousbeancrying]

I may get hate for this but this is my opinions on characters in the spider verse movies. And feel free to disagree with me. I will only be talking about the movies portrayal of characters not the comics so I may like a character more in the comics but not in the movie. And another thing I'll take into consideration is plot importance. These are just my thoughts on the characters in general like morally, personality, and how they make me feel

Miles Morales: main character so he immediately gets some points, his story in the first movie was amazing, and it kinda leaks into the second film with him trying to find his place as Spiderman and he has had some of the best moments in the franchise. It makes me so excited for them to rap up his story in the next one. 10/10

Gwen Stacy: her story has been one of the best parts of these movies as it perfectly shows why she does and act the ways she does in the movies from the loss of her best friend and that fear holding her back till miles appears and her conflict with her dad fueling her to stay with the spider society and her later facing her problems instead of running away from them makes her and amazing character, also her fight with the vulture was one of my favorite parts of the movie. 10/10

Peter B Parker: he was good in the first film with it shows his problems in his own world and Miles helping him overcome some fears like having children and in the second him having mayday showing he got his life together, but he loses major points for the second film. He did nothing important only hurting miles and I understand her joins Gwen at the end to help him but hes constantly bringing his child to battles and did nothing when Gwen was being sent home to a place where she had no safe place to stay and where her dad had tried to shoot her. Like my guy you are an adult Atleast try and say something.4/10

Peni Parker: absolutely adorable in the first film and very helpful in making and new goober her and spider are so interesting and her dynamics with porker and noir is so cool, it made me so sad when her Fathers mech died. While she didn't do anything important in the second film the movie did a great job of showing she had changed, I can wait to see more of her in the next film. 7/10

Spider noir: I definitely think he's over rated but I can see why. his design slaps and he was quite funny in the first film, they did a great job in showing someone from a black and white world trying to adjust to a world of colours, he was a good character with some great lines despite not doing anything of much importance to the story, him throwing a car at tombstone was badass though and his relationship with peni was cute. Maybe my opinion will change on him in the next movie though. 6/10

Spider ham: I don't really feel anything towards him he had some good lines and his fight with scorpion was great but other than that he didn't really do anything, hopefully this will change in the next film. 5/10

Miguel O'Hara: here's where people may disagree with me. I like the concept for his powers and I think he's a great antagonists to Gwen and miles but other than that I don't care about him as a character. Im interesting to see what happens with him in the next film but I ain't to fond of his design, and his cannon even theory is fucking shifty, like bro the reason the world collapsed was because you replaced a dead person not because you stopped one event. Also he should not be treating children the way he does in the film , like dude you were a father wtf. And the hype around the character also puts me off him as well. 3/10

Jessica drew: I actually really like Jess, while she didn't do to much in the film, it was still enough to get me interested in her character from her first interaction with Gwen showing concern for her and later becoming her mentor. When Gwen gets sent home it shows her slowly swaying away from Miguel , the film actually shows a conflict within this character which a lot of characters seemingly don't get, and makes me wanna see how she's handled next film. 7/10

Hobie brown: I like Hobie he's just over rated as fuck. He makes the new watches for Gwen and the gang and also helps miles get free but other than that, he hasn't got much of an individual story in the movie yet, he just felt like a side character, which technically he is but most of the other spiders don't have the problem for me. I think I heard where seeing more of his world in the next film so hopefully it gives us more insight to his character, but I also feel like once again it's the fan girls which are ruining the character for me. 5/10

Pavitr Prabhakar: I loved him his introduction was incredible and and entire section of the movie in mumbattan was incredible, with the black hole forming in his world, it provides his character with a secondary story behind the main movie one. Him joining the gang at the end of the film even with his world collapsing shows how good of a friend he is, miles helped him so now he's gonna help miles, while he didn't do to much in the movie they did a great job of setting up his character for the next one. 7/10

Margo kess: I absolutely love her design and she wasn't in the film enough, the only thing she really did in the movie was let miles go but it had a big impact, I can't wait to see her on the team in the next film. I'm also sick of people putting her and Gwen against each other the besties deal with it. Her score would be higher I just haven't seen enough of her character yet. 6/10

Miles g morales: badass entrence and it was a really cool ending to the film, thought were don't know anything about him yet as a character so I can't really rate him yet. 4/10

Spider cat: 10/10 no questions asked.

[oleander-neruim]

hi it's me the kuervo lore anon back back again with a WALL OF TEXT and also pirates spoilers but those are pretty obvious.

starting with his Tragic Backstory™ everything about him makes so much more sense when you realize he's just shadow the hedgehog spanish dub. ie raised as the specialest child soldier ever, idolized older sibling got killed by the government, now he's on an epic bloody revenge quest and there's these blue guys trying to teach him about the power of friendship but he doesn't care. said revenge quest is also where he lost his eye btw, and his eyepatch and rings are sort of fucked up trophies.

his self image is Messed Up bc of all that. he hypes himself up in his mind like he's some amazing folk hero (in-universe he literally calls chat his "adoring fans". which. ya got me.) and then you realize that's absolutely a front so he doesn't have to think about the murders. he's paranoid as fuck about the other pirates finding out his whole deal but such a horrible liar that he seriously considers yet another murder. but he's just a silly little guy he's done nothing wrong ever in his life why would you even think about him like that.

characterization wise kuervo's got a strong sense of justice which got him in this mess in the first place. he's quick to jump to insults or casual threats and even quicker to just laugh it off (ignore the sword it's just a joke bro!!). he's not super vain but definitely cares about his appearance. there's a very good chance all that eyeliner hides some impressive eyebags. he doesn't talk much but hangs around on the edge of conversations listening to gossip like he's at the movies with a metaphorical bucket of popcorn. he's an insanely good shot but refuses to touch guns (except in life or death situations) to the point of getting jumpy when other pirates pull guns for whatever reasons. he's the type of guy to keep a knife under his pillow (that isn't canon but it's close enough). despite being in the murder faction he doesn't take bounties (one of his only trips to the bounty guild ended with eret killing a guy and getting exiled bc of his bad advice). there's actually so few kites toward the end of the server that he just hangs out with the nightingales despite calling them a bunch of losers once.

one time he crashed bek's ship on a deserted island. he's the only pirate to get away with swearing in front of owen bc he does it in spanish. he's made peace with the fact his epic revenge quest's probably going to end with him dead, but he refuses to die on any other terms than his own. he's lonely as hell but he keeps everybody at arm's length bc he knows he'll have to leave someday soon. he got kidnapped once and immediately resorted to talking to a bunch of fish. he's even aroace

Obsessed actually.

I'm. Honestly pretty hyped that I got the right vibe around him and I'm even more hyped to be able to read about him.

If there's more solid-stuff about Kuervo's background, I'd love to hear. Unless it's like. Purposely a bit shrouded I just loved reading all this.

I'm probably gonna re-read this about 20 times honestly. Thank you for the Lore Dump, I'll be eating it all promptly

[jupitermelichios]

I'm feeling the need to be a hater but in a harmless and ultimately meaningless way, so join me around this barrell and lets shoot some motherfucking fish

Disclaimer: I am not telling you you can't enjoy these movies, or judging your taste if you loved them. This is literally just me being a hater about movies that happen to bug me personally for various reasons.

*of these random 10 11 movies I personally really hated

** obligatory disclaimer that I did not pay to watch this movie, JKR did not make a single penny out of my morbid fascination with cinematic trainwrecks

(despite what this list suggests, I watch a lot of movies that aren't cgi-heavy blockbusters, but having a specific interest in movie adaptations of comic books means I watch a lot of really terrible cgi-heavy blockbusters)

Anti-propoganda below the cut

Spawn: this movie hurts to look it. One of the single most visually unpleasant experiences of my life, and I'm including recovering from major surgery in that.

Batman v Superman: the entire plot hinges on people believing Superman shot a man to death with a gun. A less significant but unavoidable plot point involves Lex Luthor giving someone a jar of his own piss as a death threat. Compared to that, the Martha thing barely registers as stupid.

Cats: is it as bad as the viral reviews claimed? Sadly no. Did I almost strain a muscle trying not to laugh too loudly at how terrible it was when I saw it in the cinema? Absolutely.

Fantastic Beasts: none of the FB movies could reasonably be described as good, but the third one really lends credence to the JKR black mould poisoning theory.

The King's Man: they very clearly ran out of filming time/locations due to covid, and then for some reason instead of shelving what cannot have been a particularly expensive production, they decided to edit together what little footage they had and release it as one of the most fascinatingly incoherent movies of the last decade.

Last Airbender: the very rare movie that actually is as bad as the negative hype, this may have the worst use of cgi superpowers in all of cinema.

Fant4stic: if you don't have depression, but want to know what it feels like, watch this movie. That utter emptiness you're now feeling? That's what depression feel like. You don't feel bad, necessarily. You just feel nothing.

Transformers: none of the bayformers movies are good, but Last Knight is the only one which just straight up doesn't make sense. It's like someone took the strawman 'terrible soulless entirely CGI blockbuster' movie people use in tumblr arguments about hollywood, and decided to actually make it.

Black Adam: I feel bad about how terrible this film is, because it was a genuine passion project, and it has a great cast, but it also has the worst colour-grading and some of the worst editting I've ever seen. If a group of untallented first year film students got trapped in purgatory with dwayne johnson, pierce brosnan, and manual editting equipment from the 1930s, and had to make a superhero film in order to escape, this is the film they'd make.

TMNT: this film just makes me irrationally angry. It feels like a bad youtube skit about 'what if michael bay made an animated kids movie' but it's real and it cost $150 million

Flash: this was going to be a 10 option poll, but then I remembered this movie includes CGI christopher reeve, against the express wishes of christopher reeve, and WB went ahead and released it after Ezra Miller was arrested for kidnapping, and then it had the gall to also be a terrible film in almost every way.

[whatareyoudoingwithamaserati]

yessss, two friends showed me jennifers body a couple years ago! the movie deserves every single bit of hype it gets, i had so much fun, it was delicious!

(if you have more recs? 👀👀 I love literary/audio horror but ive been too... idk, scared? because i don't know what i like when it comes to visuals?)

LET’S GOOOOO!!! I put off watching Jennifer’s Body for so long because I was worried it would not live up to the hype but MAN was it worth it. They have been plaguing my thoughts ever since. I am especially a massive fan of the costume design because they NAILED that shit!!

Admittedly I’m more into horror movies than novels (it is . So hard to read these days) and podcasts have never caught my fancy, but it would feel wrong to not recommend sign here by Claudia Lux and the ever infamous American psycho by Bret Easton Ellis. I actually haven’t finished American psycho because it is a dense read but my god it’s a beautiful masterpiece of a book and I did not expect it to be as hilarious as it is

Movie wise I tend to jump all over the place and watch whatever catches my fancy so this is. Not a very cohesive rec list and not full of very many older homoerotic movies but. I plan to watch more when I can

First and foremost I am an absolute die hard fan of house of 1000 corpses. I cannot put into words how much I love it in all of its weirdness. It was made by rob zombie of living dead girl fame and you can TELL in the best of ways. It’s got fun colour grading, excessive swearing, weird ass characters, and such a fun setting. I’d say it’s on the medium-heavy side of gore with a couple of body horror scenes and a good bit of blood and mutilation. The seocnd movie is good, third eh, but you don’t actually need to watch those two. They take the camp of the first movie and turn it into a more gritty realistic energy that is almost meanspirited in nature

I’m a HUGE cabin fever fan and I will recommend it at every chance I get, BUT! There is a caveat and that is that it is not only significantly gory but also that it is weird, campy, kitschy, and a real big fan of slurs, LOL. I think we hit several n-words, an r-word or two, and some use of faggot. Some of the later scenes are downright WEIRD but despite it all it is one of my favourite horrors with some really haunting scenes

Hellraiser in general is a wonderful franchise, I love Clive Barker’s choice to base the cenobites around a mix of BDSM and gay culture and how he characterizes pinhead, even if the later movies fuck it up a little. The 2022 standalone is a huge favourite in particular, I love the imagery and the cenobite redesigns that lean heavier into body horror as well as the cinematography. Jamie Clayton’s pinhead is fucking INCREDIBLE to boot

If you like erotic horror, X is definitely a good one to watch - the plot centres around sex workers determined to make an erotic film and make it big, with some immaculate commentary on desirability, beauty, and aging. Good bit of tits and ass in that one, as well as medium level gore. It also has two sequels, Pearl and MaXXXine, which are set in the past and future respectively. Pearl was secretly shot at the same time as X in the same location and focuses on the lust for fame, the need to make it big, and a youthful mania of sorts coming from Pearl. MaXXXine I haven’t actually seen yet so I cannot say much about it, but I hope to get to it soon!

The fear street trilogy is also a remarkably well done series that seamlessly covers one long tangled mystery throughout three different timelines, using the same handful of actors for each one! The use of setting and cinematography is so fuckint cool, the eventual mystery reveal is absolutely wild, and there’s even a canon queer relationship! The gore isn’t too bad, I’d say light but there are some moments that push it to a medium at best

Ready or Not is a movie I enjoy for a variety or reasons (I think the iconic shot of Grace in a ripped and bloody wedding dress is pretty big on the internet), from the setting to the storytelling to Samara Weaving’s fucking banshee screams, with medium-light gore (though the bits that do show up are impactful as all hell. Cabin in the Woods is fun as a deconstruction of the horror genre (and a story that theoretically makes every single horror movie made canon, wow), though it’s also just really fucking funny. Another medium gore!

Candyman 2021 is a brilliant take on an old legacy of movies (again, no previous ones need watching) with a wonderful exploration of gentrification, black trauma, and what makes the candyman the candyman. I know I keep talking about cinematography but holy fuck, the multimedia use in this film in particular. Immaculate. I feel practically obligated to recommend Deathgasm, which is an indie horror with some pretty wicked gore, if not just because the main characters are all metalheads, and as one myself, it’s SO COOL to see us as protags in a horror movie

Last but not least, Prey 2022. Holy fuck, Prey is an utter masterpiece. It’s the latest addition to the predator franchise, another one of those ones you don’t Need to have watched in order to watch prey, but havint seen them gives the watching experience a good bit more depth, with iconic lines being given a new spin. It’s technically a prequel to the first ever predator movie, focusing on one of the first few appearances of a predator on earth (ehhh debatable considering the canon of aliens vs predator but I’m ignoring that for the sake of conciseness), giving it more a more basic appearance and weapons, while also letting it kick absolute ASS. The plot is incredible, the cinematography is incredible, the CGI animals are so much better than ever expected, and it’s also the first ever feature length film to ever have an official Comanche dub!!! Holy fuck!!

As a bonus, though I haven’t seen it, Doctor Sleep also seems like a really well done movie! It’s based off of the Stephen King book set after the shining, reprising and revisiting a lot of iconic moments to tell a new story with fucking incredible visuals that put their own spin on the shining

[usergreenpixel]

MALMAISON MEDIA SALON SOIRÉE 16: LE CHIRURGIEN DE L’EMPIRE (2020)

1. The Introduction

SURPRISE!!! Hello, Neighbors, and welcome to Malmaison Media Salon! I did promise you to make a surprise review and here it is!!!

Time for obscure shorts to get the spotlight!

Okay, story time. Most people in Napoleonic community like Larrey. A lot. I’m one of them for a lot of reasons (my interest in anatomy and medicine included), but he and many other surgeons remain on the obscure side of the spectrum when it comes to media, which I find to be unfair. 

So, convinced that there must be something out there at least about Larrey, I decided to do some digging and, lo and behold, found this movie on YouTube (in French with English subtitles). That really was like opening a treasure chest that might be containing a trap or two.

I felt excited about the fact that Larrey has something about him, but also a bit cautious about the quality of the movie. Luckily, I enjoyed it, but more on that later.

As promised, this review is dedicated to @amypihcs and @kaxen , but I’d like to include a dedication to the equally wonderful @tairin , my first friend in the Napoleonic community (all of the community is amazing btw).

Okay, this review is going to be relatively short, so let’s begin, shall we?

2. The Summary

The short in question only tells a snippet of Larrey’s story and shows him during the Battle of Waterloo.

Here’s the official IMDb summary:

“1815 Waterloo, whilst the soldiers of the Emperor Napoleon fight with desperation, a man braves all danger to come to their aid with an ambulance. On this very day, too close to the enemy lines, Dominique Larrey rides towards his destiny and posterity.”

It might sound glorifying to some people, but not to me. Medical staff doesn’t get acknowledged nearly as often as they should, but let’s see how well was this homage done.

3. The Story

Despite only being 10 minutes long, the movie does a pretty good job of showcasing Larrey as a character and tells a snippet story that is, well, an actual short story in this context.

(Spoiler alert)

We see Larrey in action from the get go (obviously, because it’s a damn battle), but then he’s informed that more patients need help, rides to save them, is wounded, captured, almost executed and saved by Blucher at the last moment.

So there is a story structure with a beginning and an end, which is very hard to do with only 10 minutes of screen time available, so I do have a lot of respect for those who can tell short stories well.

Even the filler scenes with Larrey’s family aren’t an issue because they do showcase what people think of him and how his job has downsides like missing out on a lot of family time.

My only issue is that the ending is a bit of a cliffhanger, but then there’s text on screen neatly wrapping things up.

4. The Characters

Larrey is an actually flawed character! Yay! Here he’s brave and altruistic but also extremely reckless and stubborn. I liked his quip to an officer demanding to be treated first that he doesn’t care about rank (because triage doesn’t work this way). Also he isn’t a stereotypical today’s manly man and cries when he believes he’s about to be executed, so he does have moments of vulnerability and emotions.

Isaure Larrey has one scene where she’s being a bit of a bratty teenager, but I can understand that she misses her father and is concerned that Hippolyte doesn’t see Larrey often. She’s a teenager and it’s realistic for her to be kind of resentful at times, even though she got too rude and bratty at one point and made me want to punch her.

Blucher is hyped up by German characters as this cruel man who orders the execution of prisoners, but he recognizes Larrey and saves him, so both sides are humanized. It’s also historically accurate so additional kudos!

Elisabeth Larrey clearly loves her husband very much and is upset about Isaure talking smack, which is normal. Elisabeth is the adult so she’s much more understanding about her husband’s occupation, which is fair enough.

5. The Setting

If you’re squeamish about blood, be careful since the movie doesn’t shy away from horrors of war, but the setting actually benefits from that. Nothing is glossed over, even though the amputation isn’t shown so no trigger warnings for the gore.

6. The Acting

Fucking. Excellent. Acting. From. Everyone.

7. The Music

Excellent music, especially during the tenser moments. Really sets the tone!

8. The Conclusion

Please watch this movie. It’s really good and I only have one or two complaints about it. We really need to acknowledge medical staff more often.

On that note, let us finish today’s soirée. Hope you liked the surprise!

Love,

Citizen Green Pixel

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hi love! A few of my mutuals have put these beautifully done matchups on my dash and I figured I'd give it a whirl! Especially since despite being here for a while I don't really talk to the community members that much!

I'm gonna try to do as many of the questions as possible so warning for the LONG ask! What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why? Keeping You Around - Nothing But Thieves, specifically the chorus! Your lips want anyone else / Mine taste like everyone else Oh, that's a tragedy / Try not to pity myself You fall back into yourself / Oh, what a mess we're in I've got more hope of killin' war / Or seein' sound, ah-ah Than I've got of keepin' you around / Of keepin' you around, of keepin' you around Honestly this song reminds me of pre-confession Gavin and that grey area of the Freelancer's relationship with everyone else at that point during the cost.

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why? Yes!!!! I love watching them with my long-distance partner while we do parallel play and stuff on video call. We tend to cycle between Nexpo who does video game/internet horror long video essays (my ABSOLUTE favorite is his cinematic movie that retells the story of Ben Drowns called Ben Drowns Again) and Speedrunning videos like Summoning Salt or SmallAnt

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?) I have changed my name many times! I have ultimately landed on a new first and middle name! Damien Agro, both are in some part inspired by the channel however they mean more to me than the original inspiration. Damien is probably one of my highest kins (i say that like he's not in fact my highest kin) and also the name is the first one to really FEEL like me, especially after I re-labled as a transman instead of nonbinary

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why? Damien and Huxley's Solstice Comfort. It was the first time Damien really opened up about the Inversion to Huxley in a video as Damien and Huxley's after shocks took place on different days and Damien's was during Huxley's trip back home. I think it was a really important moment for the two of them and hearing it is a little to close to home sometimes.

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.) Sam, and I think its partially because I was there for his original introduction during the Bright Eyes series, in which he was not the person that Darlin' fell for. I know Erik had personal reasons for ending that series, but a part of me will always feel like it's because Darlin' would never had fallen for someone who said the things Sam had.

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to. Clue (1985)!!! This movie has been my favorite ever since I was a little kid and I love it now. On days where I'm super overstimulated I really love going back to this movie cause it's familiar! My partner and I quote it on a daily basis

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend? I want to have the t-boy swag that Asher exudes and I want to be his best friend. We'd share transition tips and he can help me cut my hair.

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.) PLANES PLANES ITS EITHER PLANES OR MARINE LIFE I WILL RAMBLE ABOUT SHARKS OR PLANES OR STINGRAYS OR ANYTHING OCEAN OR AIR RELATED

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo. Dr. Pepper (I quit energy drinks 2 WHOLE YEARS ago) or Cheerwine, and probably an Almond Joy or a mini Ice Cream

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment.  My Dasher playlist and my Damien and Huxley playlist ;w; those lil guys mean so much to me

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why? Longplays with no commentary, I love video game ambience and I will just put on like a full playthrough of Five Nights at Freddy's just to hear the noises.

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are! I think I've told you a good amount that calls for more questions if you have them! But thank you so much for having this little game going! -Damien

Ooh, an opportunity to pontificate about one of my favorite ships. I know we all love HuxDami, lord knows I do, but if I’ve got a Damien kinnie on my hands, I’ve got to let you know how sweet you’d be with Gavin.

First things first, we love a t4t couple. I think it’s super cute, and it can be so lovely to share a life with someone who has firsthand experience with what you’re going through. That said, I am so incredibly passionate about Gavin and his choosing of his own name and refusal to change how he looks to please anyone as a trans allegory. Thus, a gorgeous t4t couple who has all the transition tips for each other and would have the best thrift-shopping trips for the best fits. It can be so fun but also so harrowing to shop for clothes that feel gender-affirming while also looking good, and I think Gavin would be an absolute master of that, like having your own personal stylist who you also get to kiss.

Second things second, I think y’all could have a really cute, sweet, domestic life together. We get the idea that Gavin drifted a lot before he found a reason to settle into Dahlia, so I think there’s nothing he’d love more than staying home and binging Nexpo videos. I can imagine lots of chill, cozy nights in with him distracting you both while cooking, lazing about the couch in casual, unsexy underwear, him stealing your Cheerwine because he’d never tried it before he met you and he’s addicted to it now.

Song:

You're sitting on the chair/ Wrapped inside a bedsheet/ Playing with your hair/ Watching people on the high street/ If I wished myself a superpower/ I would make this moment last for hours/ If I had my will, time would just stand still/ Wait for me until I find some magic film/ To take a photograph and live inside

One, we love Cody Fry. What a darling. Two, I love how this encapsulated those cozy, loving, domestic nights that I was telling you about. A bittersweet three, this works especially well with Gavin or any of the other d(a)emons who know they won’t have forever with their human lives and would want this, want to preserve those moments as best as possible.

Runner-ups:

Camelopardalis would be a sweet runner-up, because I think he’d really like your vibes. I can see you infodumping about the ocean or watching your long gameplay videos being both relaxing but also fulfilling for him. Lasko, I love as a runner-up because his story also strikes me as a trans allegory and I think you could be a good influence in getting him to quit caffeine. Bless his heart, that boy does not need it.

note: again congratulations on yours and Pickle’s engagement 💕

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[slipping-through-my-fingertips]

In My Head, I'm Yours

Ao3

Chapter 2: Yeah, He's Got a Shot Though (No, Not Really)

a/n: little spicy at the end

Annabeth didn’t have a choice in coming tonight. She had no exams, no papers, and no drafting to do, there were a couple of readings she needed to get done but those could wait. It was spring break, the perfect opportunity for Leo and Thalia to make good on their promise of dragging her to see Thalia’s brother’s band. She hadn’t seen Jason in a couple of months so it would be great to catch up and Annabeth wanted to spend some quality time with Thalia before she and Jason left for California in two days.

Of course, as soon as they entered the bar, Leo was offered to grab them drinks. Hellbent on getting Annabeth hammered. Thalia squeezed her hand, “Don’t worry, Miss Goody Good, I’ll keep him in line.”

They ended up sitting at the bar. Leo was fairly friendly with the bartenders and they were served almost immediately despite the crowd.

“How?” Annabeth asked, gesturing to the line waiting to order.

Leo winked, “It’s all in the looks, baby.”

Thalia groaned, “he has class with Frank. The giant with the buzzcut.”

That made a lot more sense, Leo didn’t seem like he was Frank’s type.

The stage lights flashed and Jason appeared. He headed straight for his purple drum kit and immediately started playing. It wasn’t any particular beat, just sound to hype up the crowd. Annabeth could feel the vibrations weaving their way under her skin. God, she missed live music. She missed going out.

Being a senior at Columbia sucked. For once, she was thinking it for non-academic reasons.

Then a girl came out on stage, she had dark choppy hair and beautiful tanned skin. She wore light brown hiking boots with at least a 3-inch heel, army green cargo pants, and a tight, semi-see-through black glittery top. Annabeth loved the juxtaposition of sexy and not. The girl took her spot on the left side of the stage behind a keyboard.

And finally, another boy hopped on stage. Annabeth couldn’t stop staring at him.

His black hair fell just above his green eyes. His green plaid flannel only made them more enticing. What she wouldn't give to have those eyes staring at her. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so attracted to someone whose name she didn’t even know.

Halfway through the set, Annabeth got her wish. He was staring right back at her. Gods, she hoped Thalia didn’t notice her cheeks warming. There was no force on earth that could make her look away.

When the girl, whose name was Piper—Annabeth found out from Leo—stopped singing, the boy who still hadn’t taken his eyes off her started talking.

“This next one requires a little crowd participation, think you can handle a little clapping?” he asked, “Jason take it away.”

Jason began explaining the clapping system and honestly, Annabeth was trying to watch him but the other boy was bending over to store his tambourine away and his jeans couldn’t have been any tighter.

“Alright, one more time!” Jason shouted.

This time Annabeth did pay attention. After all, she couldn’t be the only one not clapping especially if he was going to be watching her.

The three of them sang this one together. It was the first song Jason had joined in on. Piper had the first verse, they all sang the chorus, then he began singing.

My shrink is telling me I got crazy dreams She’s also saying I got low self-esteem

He shrugged and met Annabeth’s gaze again. And she’d swear he was talking to her when he sang:

She’s kinda hot though Yeah, she’s kinda hot though

Annabeth took a sip of her drink and tried not to think about how much she wanted to talk to this black-haired gorgeously talented boy. She did her best to put the thoughts of jumping his bones aside and listened to Jason’s voice, which she hadn’t properly heard before tonight.

She and the Grace siblings had definitely had their fair share of Disney singalong movie nights but it was always goofy. This was different. Jason sounded wonderful. It was almost a shame he was tucked behind the drums instead of upfront singing all night. Though he was insane on the drums too.

Jason: Sometimes I’m feeling like I’m going insane My neighbor told me that I got bad brains But I’m alright though

All: We’re alright though Yeah, we’re alright though Cause we’re the kings and the queens of the new broken scene And we’re alright though

Jason hit his drumsticks together and counted to four.

All: They say we’re losers and we’re alright with that

The audience, including Annabeth, clapped out the beat Jason had taught them

All: We are the leaders of the not-coming-backs But we’re alright though Yeah, we’re alright though We are the kings and the queens of the new broken scene

Before she knew it, it was over. Two hours and three drinks later, the band was bidding them farewell.

“Thank you for coming out tonight,” Piper said, “you’ve been a pleasure to play for. Please give it up for our handsomely talented Jason on drums!”

The crowd loudly applauded for Jason. Thalia was whistling for her brother.

“Now for Percy on vocals, guitar, and a madman on that tambourine!”

Percy. Percy. Percy.

“And I’m your wondrous beautiful Piper on keys and we’ve been Delphi!”

… The first thing Percy wanted to do was get to the bar. He couldn’t risk her running off. Still, he did their after-show ritual hug before sprinting to the bar. Clearly, he hadn’t run fast enough because Jason and Piper were hand in hand and standing right behind him.

“Come on, dummy, she’s sitting with my sister. She’ll introduce you,” Jason assured him.

As they approached them, the air left Percy’s lungs. She was somehow more beautiful up close. He hadn’t been this tongue-tied since he asked Sara Connors to senior prom. Hopefully, this meeting would go as well as prom had.

“Jase!” Thalia clapped her brother’s shoulder. “You were amazing up there!”

“Who knew you could sing?” The blonde girl said.

And her voice was like honey. Sweet and melting on your tongue.

“Thals did,” Jason said, “when we still lived together I practiced a lot.”

“In my bathroom,” Thalia deadpanned.

“The acoustics were better!” Jason defended.

Thalia rolled her eyes.

“Oh, this is Piper and Percy,” Jason introduced. “And this is Leo and Annabeth.”

Annabeth.

“Nice to meet you both,” Piper said.

“Did you enjoy the set?” Percy asked, but he was looking right at Annabeth.

She finished off her drink before speaking, “you’re really good. I’ve never heard your stuff before tonight.”

Percy took the open barstool next to her, “and we impressed?”

“Definitely.”

“Can I buy you a drink?”

She smiled and waved the bartender over.

In an hour, Percy learned that Annabeth liked to intersperse her alcoholic drinks with water. She was a senior at Columbia studying to be an architect. He noticed that she tilted her head when she was considering his questions and played with the ends of her hair while he was telling her stories. Her gray eyes lit up when she laughed and he tried to keep track of which of his jokes made her throw her head back in laughter. Percy thought he’d die happy as long as she was smiling at him.

In two hours, Leo and Jason were playing pool. Though Percy was fairly sure they were making up their own rules. And he knew there weren’t so many tequila shots in pool.

Piper and Thalia were deep in conversation about fashion.

Piper was studying Textile and Fashion Design at Goode College and she was telling her about this lecture she attended on the implications of fast fashion. Percy had heard all about it the day after the lecture. Piper had actually pounded on his apartment door and demanded he sit, shut up, and let her rant.

In three hours, Piper and Jason split a cab home, likely going back to Piper's since Jason's roommate was a tad nutty. Leo was chatting up some girl, it looked like it was going well despite how intoxicated he was. Thalia looked like she was going to fall asleep at the bar. Slumped over holding her head up by her hand.

“Thalia,” Annabeth said, “why don’t I get you an Uber home?”

It was already midnight according to Percy’s phone. He wondered when last call was.

“Aren’t you coming with me, blondie?” She yawned.

Annabeth looked at Percy before turning back to her friend.

“I’m going to stay a little longer but I don’t want to keep you up.”

“Hmm, fine, Uber me.”

So Annabeth pulled out her phone and did just that.

Three and half hours later found Percy in his own Uber home trying not to touch Annabeth before they got to his apartment. He intertwined his fingers and kept them buried between his legs to stop himself from reaching over and squeezing her exposed thigh. Gods, that little black dress was torture. When the streetlights shined through the window, he could tell Annabeth was struggling to not do the same to him.

As soon as they were safe in his own space, Percy lifted her against his front door and buried his hands between Annabeth’s thighs.

[out-and-aboot-eh]

Day 7 - Revelstoke to Wells Grey Guest Ranch

I am pleased to confirm that a new sleeping bag (or at least a bigger and warmer one!) goes a long way, as does waking up to beautiful sunshine! Where we’re constantly surrounded by beauty you don’t always take it in, but on my trip to the bathroom before many people were awake it was nice just to look back at our little travelling family all pitched up in a circle with the backdrop of the mountains and the rising sun. Although I cursed the group of crows that had been squawking since day break, they seem to have followed us round the last couple of campsites!

Today was one of our heavier travelling days, but not the heaviest! Our destination, Wells Grey Guest Ranch. I must admit despite having ample time to write this, I’m so very easily distracted by other conversations so I’m wracking my memory to remember what we did two days ago, luckily others are keeping travel journals and I’ve got photos to remind me. Other than the usual selection of breakfast options, we also had some left over pizza, fried! Welcome to Canada - where you’ll leave a stone heavier than you arrived!

Our first stop of the day was a little or rather a large, ice cream place by the name of Dutchmen Dairy. Megan had hyped up this place pretty early in to the trip and it did not disappoint, firstly it looked like something out of a movie or a kids toy, a big old red barn! Then the flavours on offer were top tier! They had your basic flavours, like strawberry, vanilla and chocolate, but they also had salted caramel, chocolate orange, cherry blossom, the list goes on as there were 60 in total! We all piled in and came out with various flavours and numbers of scoops in cones and cups before going to see the cute little cows in the paddocks next door. I don’t know if it was the black and white patterned shorts or just Daisy’s luck, but one of the cows gave them a yank down! If ice cream wasn’t your thing (I’m not sure anyone in our party falls into that category) there was also a Fruit and Veg shop across the road, which was an array of colour with stacks of stock in all shapes and sizes. Once we (everyone else) had stocked up on cherries and berries we were back in the minibus and on the road.

After another hour and a half or so we stopped for a break in a spot that had a ‘Shoppers’. A name that gives me and G a little chuckle every time we see one due to its mention in the musical ‘Come From Away’. When we stepped outside of the minibus we were hit by 34 degrees of sunny heat, which we haven’t had much of in the last few days, the weather here is crazily interchangeable! A couple of hours or so later we arrived at our final destination for the next two nights, Wells Grey Guest Ranch. It was hard not be charmed by its classic ranchy vibes, there were huge fields with horses and cattle in, the sound of chickens in the distance, a scruffy cat, a couple of old smelly dogs and a couple of rocking chairs on the porch. Our host however wasn’t quite as charming, I dare say he might have been German or Swiss, either way he gave us a long list of rules including how to flush the toilet due to the temperamental septic tank system.

Once we’d been shown exactly where to park, set up and cook, Megan got out another set of rules that the campsite had provided! We chuckled our way through the additional information, before bringing over the dinner gear to the designated area and heading off to set up our tents in the designated areas. However, we were one tent less as Markus and Christina (affectionately referred to as ‘The Germans’) had opted to upgrade to a cabin, they are on their honeymoon after all! One of the reasons we had to be so particular with our set up (other than to avoid the wrath of our host) was another G Adventures tour group would be joining the ranch for two days as they go the opposite way to us. There was a long creaky bench by the cooking station which soon filled up with the group cracking open cold beverages and passing around big bags of crisps. Cheese toasties and tomato soup were on the menu, followed by a bit more line dancing. I say line dancing, based on what followed it may well have been something a little stronger…

The sky was awash with pink and orange, but in the distance, billowing grey clouds were looming as the wind started to pick up. It wasn’t long before one of the rustling tents became our first casualty and snapped under the pressure of the draft. Megan moved the minibus in front of the line of tents to protect them (us) from any trees falling down, just as another tent went ping! I was already holding on our tent with a tinny in hand for extra weight! We may have been the first to pitch, but the other group’s tents didn’t seem to be in the wind tunnel, so we uprooted our remaining tents and moved them over to their patch. Our host didn’t seem too concerned with the pandemonium going on around his ranch and certainly didn’t feel inclined to offer up the empty lodges around us one of which was called ‘Jail’.

Due to three tents breaking, some of our group were left homeless, so I shotgunned Little Fingers as her name suggests, she doesn’t take up much space! Our chance to go to the saloon had passed, so instead we hit the bench and played some more Werewolf game, which has become a real camp favourite! We even took on a couple of new crew members from the other group who were envious of how much fun we are compared to theirs. We certainly are fun, fun and a little bit feral!

Georgie’s highlight of the day: Line dancing and the sunset (before the storm hit!)

[katherinejblackwell]

Katherine's Tea Party 1- My Winter TBR

Also read on my website!

Photo by Anastasia Kostyleva

Hello and welcome to the very first blog post on my brand-new website! I'm very excited to have my own pretty little spot on the internet to talk about the things I'm most passionate about. Hopefully a few people decide to join in on the fun along the way, but for now, I'm perfectly content to be yelling into the void. So without any further delay, allow me to share some of the books I've put on my Winter TBR and why.

Number 1- The Secret History and The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt

Amidst my semi-recent foray into the dark academia aesthetic, these seem like no-brainers. I started reading The Secret History about two years ago, but final exams made it difficult for me to find the time to read it. Now that things have slowed down again, I've picked it back up from the beginning, and I'm really enjoying it. The descriptions are what I've found most interesting--even when we're reading descriptions of beauty, there's a constant creepy, haunting undertone in Tartt's words. As for The Goldfinch, I admittedly know very little about it aside from reading the blurb a few weeks ago, but I think the fact that it's by Donna Tartt and is a Pulitzer Prize winner is more than enough encouragement to add it to the list.

Number 2- The Hunger Games trilogy and The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins

The Hunger Games is, and I think will always be, one of my absolute favorite book series. I find myself coming back to it again and again, and I was recently re-infected with the need to read the trilogy amongst the hype surrounding the new movie coming out this month. I'm the type of person who has to read the book before watching the movie, which is why I added The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes to the list as well. It's just come in on hold for me at the library, so it'll be briefly interrupting my reading of The Secret History. I'm very eager to dive back into one of my favorite fictional worlds, despite the mixed feelings I've seen from other Hunger Games fans regarding Songbirds and Snakes​.

Number 3- Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

I picked this duology up for myself many moons ago and have yet to read it. I unintentionally took a break from fantasy for a while, but as we approach Winter, I keep imagining myself on the couch devouring fantasy novels with a warm drink by my side. So, most of the rest of this list is fantasy books. I think these two will be some of the first I pick up when snow starts hitting the ground here because I have heard nothing but good about Leigh Bardugo's books and I'm eager to finally venture into her world.

Number 4- The Red Queen series by Victoria Aveyard

I've read the first two books in this series two or three times each because I was dead set on owning a complete set of the gorgeous collector's editions of these books for the longest time. Red Queen was the very first collector's edition I bought for myself when I was in middle school and I was utterly entranced by every detail of it. I have since seen reason and (mostly) given up on the idea of the collector's editions for the final two books ever coming out, so for now, I'll be checking the next two books out from the library this Winter and crossing my fingers that one day my dream will come true.

Number 5- Set Fire to the Gods by Kristen Simmons and Sara Raasch

This is another title that I started and never finished about two or three years ago. In my defense, I started it as my second book in a 24-hour readathon, and I was absolutely delirious by the time I got to it. I'd actually read a decent chunk of the book during the readathon--I believe half or more--but I could never gather up the motivation to finish it. I could barely remember what I had read in my sleep-deprived state anyway, so eventually it seemed better to just start over altogether. This book has an absolutely gorgeous cover and a very pretty purple map on the inside, so if nothing else I'm excited to stare at it for hours.

Number 6- Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao

This one I bought for myself a while back amidst the craze on Booktok, and I never got around to reading it due to my aforementioned break from fantasy. I don't remember much about the synopsis of this book, and I think I'll keep it that way so it's a bit of a surprise going in. Things are often popular for a reason, and I wouldn't have bought it if I wasn't sure at the time that I would enjoy it, so I have high hopes for it. I think I've also heard that a sequel of some sort came out recently, so if I enjoy Iron Widow maybe I'll add that to my list too.

Number 7- Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Once again, I bought this title for myself a while ago and never got around to it during my fantasy break. The cover alone is enough to make me want to read it, but I've also heard that there is some amount of dark academia vibes in this novel, so it will absolutely be right up my alley. I am very excited to read it and I'm expecting it to be one of my favorites from this list. I think this will be a good one to read in my initial transition from Donna Tartt's novels to my fantasy picks for the season.

Number 8- The Devil and the Dark Water ​by Stuart Turton

Transitioning out of fantasy-land, we have a handful of mystery novels joining the fray. I was recently reminded of this book while shelving at work last week and added it to my list ASAP. I read Turton's The Seven and a Half Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle a while ago and absolutely LOVED it. It was a creative, incredibly compelling read that I just could not put down, and if The Devil and the Dark Water is anything like Seven and a Half Deaths, sign me up a million times over. ​

Number 9- The Paris Apartment by Lucy Foley

I initially resisted adding The Paris Apartment to any sort of TBR, I think because I kept seeing it in emails from B&N. But I have since warmed up to it, and after reading the description of it by the book drop at work, I became intrigued enough to add it to the list. I do not often read mystery (aside from Turton's first novel), so hopefully, this will be a good book to bring me more into the genre.

Number 10- Arsenic and Adobo by Mia P. Manasala

This is another one I discovered while working at the library, and I was highly tempted to sneakily check it out to myself right then and there. I thought the title was a little humorous, and that combined with the cover art caught my eye right away (and mention of a Dachshund named Longanisa in the blurb only added to the appeal). I'm not sure when I'll be finishing my fantasy craze and getting to the few mysteries I have on this list, but I'm very much looking forward to this book when I do.

Number 11- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Another mystery and another book that has been very popular on the internet. I didn't originally have specific plans to read this book, but I saw a few posts about it floating around at about the same time I was putting my list together, and I thought maybe it was time to see what all the hype was about. The plot certainly sounds interesting, and I'll be looking forward to this one as I work my way through the list.

Number 12- Vanishing Girls ​by Lauren Oliver

This is one I inherited from my sister when she was cleaning out her own collection of books, and it's been sitting on my shelf for years now, constantly getting pushed back in the TBR by newer titles. I've read a handful of Lauren Oliver books and enjoyed most of them, and since it's been sitting on my shelf so long and I'm hoping to read a few other mysteries this season, I think it's time to finally give this one a shot. 

Number 13- The Surrender Theory by Caitlin Conlon

These last few are a bit of a mix. This first one, a collection of poems, was an absolutely adventure to track down recently. I don't remember how exactly I stumbled upon it in the first place, but I ended up reading the preview on Google Books sometime around Winter or Spring last year. Not only was it some of the most engaging poetry I've ever read, it had a poem related to The Great Gastby, which absolutely sent it over the edge for me because I am OBSESSED with The Great Gatsby. A month or so ago, I decided I wanted to read it again, but it had been lost in my mess of tabs and automatically cleared from my history. I only found it again by chance when looking through the Favorites album in my gallery and, lo and behold, there was a screenshot of the Gatsby poem with the title of the book at the top. Now I am very happy to say that I will be reading it as soon as possible. Though that as soon as possible may be some time, seeing as none of the libraries in my system have this particular book as of yet. Perhaps I'll have to buy it as a little treat to myself for surviving the holiday season. ​

Number 14- Self-Made Boys: A Great Gatsby Remix by Anna-Marie McLemore

This feels appropriate to put next after just having mentioned my ardent love for Gatsby. I was beyond excited when The Great Gatsby came into public domain a few years ago and all of the retellings started to appear. My eyes were wide with possibility and my heart full of joy because it truly is my favorite classic and one of my favorite books period. There are a few other adaptations besides this one that I'd like to read later on, including The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo and Beautiful Little Fools by Jillian Cantor, but this one is at the top of my list for now, and so has made it onto my Winter TBR. ​

Number 15- Since We Last Spoke by Brenda Rufener

I can't remember now if I saw this book at the library or in a YouTube video, but either way it's the last one on my list! I tried (and failed) to find proof without getting spoilers, but at least from the cover, this novel seems like it takes place in Winter, which is a big reason why I added it to this list. I'm very much the kind of person who likes to match the vibe of a book to the season I'm in. Sometimes the vibe I imagine a book has makes real, logical sense, and sometimes it is utterly nonsensical, but I believe this one is grounded in logic. If I need a break from all of the fantasy or something to transition me back into realistic fiction after I've finished the fantasy frenzy, I'm sure I'll reach for this one.

Book Rec and Drink of the Month

Photo by lil artsy

For my very first monthly book rec, I'd like to recommend The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes by Suzanne Collins. I wasn't originally going to recommend anything from the list, especially something I hadn't actually read yet, but I just adore The Hunger Games so much, and I have such high hopes for both the book and the movie. Additionally, I've always found Collins' writing style and storytelling to be so compelling, and as I've grown older I've come to appreciate the messages and themes within the text more, so I feel I can recommend the book in good conscious despite never have cracked open the cover.

As for my drink this month, I've been really enjoying the white hot chocolate from Starbucks. I'm not exactly a coffee gal, so I'm also not exactly a Starbucks gal, but I've been a few times recently, and the white hot chocolate is just amazing. I remember liking it as a kid and it still holds up today. I think it's a perfect cozy Winter beverage to sip while enjoying some books.

Thus concludes my first ever blog post! I certainly enjoyed writing it, and I hope I continue to enjoy writing them. If this reaches any eyes, I encourage you to leave a comment with some of your own Winter TBR books, book recs, or favorite cozy drinks. I'll be back in about a month with something new. Until then, stay safe and healthy and may the book gods bless thee with ample time to read and plenty of beverages to sip. 

[juniperhillpatient]

To expand on this because I got bored & fell asleep at the end of this movie (not a great sign…) I think the first 30 or so minutes of this movie felt like a typical Blumhouse movie. Nothing spectacular or noteworthy but fun! I feel like I’m constantly coming off a bit disdainful toward the Conjuring movies & Blumhouse overall but to clarify my feelings -

1. It’s a whole studio of course it spits out some masterpieces (I really liked the Blackphone, that was actually an original & interesting movie & I’n not surprised given it was based on a story by Joe King) thanks to the diversity of creatives involved I just think a lot of this studios movies are very basic unchallenging ghost stories & other studios like A24 are often producing more interesting content.

2. I do like the Conjuring movies as fun popcorn flicks. There’s nothing wrong with a little lighthearted spooky fun, but that’s all they are. There’s nothing challenging or special or subversive about the series. Every one of them is like the template for a basic ghost story. And I’m sorry but while some of the stories surrounded by the Warrens are interesting (I do find the real case behind the Devil Made Me Do it fascinating for many reasons) many of their stories have been all but proven to be exaggerated at best & hoaxes at worst. So like…. The franchise is fine? I’ve seen most of them in theatres & had a good time! But they aren’t particularly special as horror movies in my opinion.

Back to the Exorcist: Believer - this movie started off okay, like I said! It should’ve leaned into the plot about the two girls coming back from going missing Not Quite Right (& maybe not over explained the already obvious stuff so much? The Christian moms grating explanation that the girls were gone for 3 days just like Jesus & that it seems like they were in Hell - things that were already made abundantly clear through basic inferences & paying attention to the film even a little - was especially grating.)

The film really went downhill for me when it became your typical Hollywood reboot - leaning obnoxiously far into how hyped they were to get Ellen Burstyn & to play into nostalgia. So many shots in this movie were just the original but Worse. The second half of this movie is disappointing on every level. It’s not confident enough about the source material - the “feminist” parts like Chris’ rejection of the patriarchy (out of nowhere?) or speech about how Christianity & the church isn’t just about specific beliefs but about community (where did this speech come from?) & then a lady giving the exorcist (at least this one was sort of explained by the priest leaving after the church rejected his request & bordered on touching an interesting idea) —- these elements were such bland moments of hollow Hollywood feminism that actually detracted from the overall vibe of the movie.

And yet despite its lack of confidence in the source material, this movie was also not confident in itself enough to do anything original or subversive or remotely interesting. It’s the same old bed shaking scenes & creepy voices that made the original famous but it’s TWO girls now.

I haven’t actually seen the other Exorcist sequels but I LOVED the Fox television series which I think is painfully underrated & is genuinely really smart & scary horror tv as well as a much more compelling continuation of the original then…. This movie.

I’d be curious if anyone thinks the other sequels are worth watching or if anyone else has a different opinion to share about the 2023 movie but yeah - I thought it was pretty disappointing on every level LOL

I’m only about 30 minutes in & of course my review could change but so far this movie isn’t bad by any means like I’m very entertained & hooked but it is a very typical Blumhouse ghost movie. I think it would have faired better if it didn’t attach itself to the Exorcist name & allowed itself to exist on its own. maybe I’ll change my mind but it’s very typical Conjuring series spoopy vibes so far, none of the bark or bite of The Exorcist

[jigensass]

Let’s Talk about the Multiverse of Madness (objectively)

This is your only warning about spoilers for this movie so if you don’t have ‘spoilers’ blacklisted you have been warned. Also, this is gonna get pretty dark so also be warned for that.

Now that I have gotten the hype of watching this movie out of my system, I can now put my more tame thoughts into form. I did some reading on other peoples’ opinions about the film before writing this, so I am aware of their qualms with the film. However, this is my opinion about the film. I am also someone who has been a fan of Doctor Strange for almost ten years now (scary to think about when you realize I have been through Stephen’s entire MCU history from fruition to now on tumblr) and I have read the comics, so I know most of the lore.

Now, you don’t have to go into this film with much background information outside of the first film, Infinity War, and Wandavision, but if you know the lore like I do, you’re going to love this film. And loved this film I did so much I’m debating about going to the theater to watch it again, it was that good after thinking some things over. (Disclaimer I did not watch Wandavision and am not going to shovel money for Disney+ to watch Wandavision.)

I am going to touch upon all aspects of the film including lore, the future of the frachise, other people’s opinions, and what some people have seemed to missed with the theme of the film.

The first thing is that there is technically no villain, only a threat. That threat being Wanda Maximoff aka the Scarlet Witch. This is someone who currently is going through mental distress to the point of obsession. The way some phrases such as how she explained her thoughts on how she felt about taking the Mind Stone out of Vision’s head was a very human way of tackling the big theme of the film, which was based around the actions of the characters, their consequences and how they affected the people around them, and how they dealt with the hand they’ve been given in life whether it be good or bad.

Wanda just happened to take her shitty hand and turn it up to 11 by going on a multiverse murder spree.

When Wanda killed herself, it wasn’t out of force, it was out of choice because of the sheer amount of guilt she felt over the things she did. You know, like a very depressed person with no more strings to grasp at. So they do the sudoku.

Wanda is supposed to be the negative representation to Stephen how people deal with loss and trauma. Stephen doesn’t understand what Wanda is going through because he has difficulty relating to others. It took seeing himself with the powers of the Darkhold and what it did to him to realize that he should move on from Christine and not be afraid of being truly alone like he has since his accident. This is represented by not fixing his watch that he broke during the accident in the first film until the very end of this one to show that he has moved on. It was his symbol of attachment of craving that love and affection of one person, just like in Wanda’s case where she wanted the love and affection of her ‘children’. She wanted what most of the other Avengers got after Infinity War which was closure or happiness to their lives and used whatever means she could get her hands on to make herself happy without being aware of the damage it was causing.

Stephen could have had easily just given in and used the Darkhold to whisk himself away to a universe where he still was a surgeon and he had Christine’s love. Stephen could have easily took America’s power with no remorse, but instead he told her to trust herself that she could control her power. Even despite having a similar internal battle that Wanda had decided to side with. No matter how much they tried to rationally reason with her, to help her see the turth of what she was doing was unreasonable and unethichal, she had made her choice to give in to her demons and delusions. You never saw the battle with Stephen, but the signs were there.

Initially when this movie was announced to be in the genre of horror, there were two things I wanted way back when. 1. Tentacles (because it isn’t Doctor Strange if you don’t have tentacles) 2. Stephen’s emotional trauma and a fight with his sanity because of the guilt he had to carry in Infinity War. 

I got both of those in spades. 

Stephen is a very emotional person. He truly does care about people and his actions. He carries his guilt if he screws up and when he royally screwed up with the incursions, he was clinging to having the acceptance of Christine to care for him just like after his accident when the entire world had abandoned him. He was afraid of being alone. Just. like. Wanda.

I have seen some people say that Michael Waldron who was a writer for Loki and this movie ruined Loki and Stephen by putting them under powerful women, but I disagree with Stephen’s case. Wanda doesn’t overshadow him, it’s just the dynamic of how they are presenting themselves and dealing with their issues is on the opposite ends of the spectrum: Wanda is more external and vocal while Stephen is more reserved about it. It took him the entire movie to speak up and say ‘yeah I’m scared of losing you and being alone’.

Stephen and Wanda’s internal battles with achieving happiness was something I related to on a personal level. Always wanting to have what you want, not being aware of what other people may think of what you’re doing or for how they feel about the situation. I’ve been through that multiple times with multiple people. It’s only until recently that I’ve been able to realize that there have been people in my life, mostly outside of the internet who have been strong-willed enough to call me out on my bullshit instead of letting me continue to make a fucking ass of myself and realize that I have more potential than I ever realized. And it’s not only them, you have to be patient enough to listen to what they have to say to realize the truth about yourself through the lens of others and be willing to seek help when a shoulder is there for you to lean on. And this instance, I cared enough about these people to seek the help I needed to be able to become a better person.

There are multiple quotes throughout the Buddhist doctrine about the moon, its reflection, and relating it to mindfulness. The one that comes to mind when I think about the film is the monkey grabbing for the moon’s reflection in the water. It is grabbing for an illusion while the real thing is above in the sky, illuminating the night. 

Basically the entire theme of Multiverse of Madness can be summed up in this trailer for another film, which is actually a documentary.

Something else that a lot of people, I guess forgot when watching this movie, is that Stephen is just a Master of the Mystic Arts and not the Sorcerer Supreme. It just dawned on me when I was watching MoistCritikal’s review on the film that Stephen being underpowered and having “unimpressive magic” and not being able to completely subdue Wanda, someone with the power of a literal demon at her disposal who could mow the sorcerers of Kamar-taj 10 times over, is actually very fitting for this film.

The original run of Doctor Strange comics from the 80′s and 90′s are named in this order. 1. Doctor Strange: Master of the Mystics Arts 2. Doctor Strange: Sorcerer Supreme

We are just hit 1.5 in Stephen’s journey in the MCU with the introduction to the next leg of his journey. You know it, I know it, there is gonna be a third movie. Stephen’s going to become Sorcerer Supreme either because Wong dies or we finally get to see the Vishanti in their physical forms and see them give the mantle to Stephen for kicking Dormammu’s ass with the science of judo.

No, I am not making that shit up.

This is getting long already and I haven’t even talked about the other aspects of this film which are the lore and the horror.

Imma start with the latter: this is a PG-13 film, so gore is limited, but Sam Raimi definitely knew where to push the boundaries with this film and there were some moments that did actually scare me. Wanda contorting out of the gong? Black Bolt’s death? Slicing Peggy Carter in half? BREAKING PROFESSOR XAVIER’S NECK ON SCREEN?! Oh yeah, and the zombie makeup at the end was a breath of fresh air to be real instead of some CGI garbage. The cinematography in a lot of the shots was really really good or unique, especially when Wanda was dreamwalking for the first time as it switched back to her in both bodies was really good. Though scene with the slowing of time to get a jump scare in was kind of cheap.

I know I haven’t really talked about America Chavez because in all honesty, she was the just macguffin of the movie, so I really don’t have much to say except she was there to do her thing and we found out Stephen can’t speak Spanish which is hilarious. Oh, and this is what made me give this movie the praise it deserves. They gave the biggest middle finger to China in particular of showing America’s parents who are canonically lesbians on screen and there is absolutely no way you can edit it out of the film without losing some important backstory to America’s character so anyone watching this without her parents on screen will be confused as fuck as to how America got to where she was in the movie.

But now it’s on to what made this movie, for me, grin from ear to ear. All of the lore and Easter Eggs stuff within it for the Doctor Strange fans who know the ins and outs of this stupid wizard. This is not your lame ass list on the basic aspects of the movie, this is stuff that you never knew was a thing or I thought it was a nice touch to add in for continuity sake.

1. Zombie Stephen is actually Stephen from this version of the Defenders from 2011 where he slept with a college student.

Once again, I did not make that up.

2. Rintrah, the green bull from Doctor Strange Sorcerer Supreme is one of the students at Kamar-taj

3. We actually get to see what that thing did from the original movie that Stephen held at Kaecilius

4. APPARENTLY (I saw from another post) the shirt at the very end of movie that Stephen is wearing is Tony’s shirt from Iron Man 2. I don’t know if this is real or a shitpost someone made.

5. The Illuminati is here and not only did Wanda kill them, 4 out of 6 of their original members are now canon in the MCU (Professor Xavier, Reed Richards, Black Bolt, and Doctor Strange). I don’t know what the MCU is gonna do with Namor and RDJ probably was not worth it for a cameo to die again on screen.

7. The post credits scene outfit and the third eye? Doctor Strange 2015.

8. Also need I mention the one thing that people had no fucking clue about the post credits scene who she was and was literally confused about

But the instant she came on screen I lost my goddamned mind

9. We saw the Savage Lands in the multiverse hop.

10. Spells I noticed were the Rings of Raggadorr and Vipers of Valtorr

11. His backstory with his sister Donna was changed from drowning during a summer family trip to drowning in a frozen pond

Other things I saw that weren’t kind of ‘basic Doctor Strange lore’ was The Sands of Nisanti was taken from the comic book series ‘The Oath’

IN CONCLUSION: I don’t know what my conclusion was. This movie is a solid 9.5/10 for people who know the lore, 8/10 for general audiences Yes, Clea does make up a whole point just for getting a cameo. and the extra half point is for the lesbians.

[tanenigiri]

Review #5: I Hear the Sunspot (Volume 1)

Japanese title: ひだまりが聴こえる (Hidamari ga Kikoeru)

Story and art: Yuki Fumino

English publisher: One Peace Books

Number of volumes: 5 in English, 6 in Japanese (ongoing)

What’s a wall to someone who’s willing to jump over it?

(This review contains story spoilers.)

Sometimes you come across a book (or a movie or a TV series) with a premise that’s so interesting that it’s almost begging you to read (or watch) it. Sure, you don’t know if the execution will live up to your initial hype, but it’s worth it to see how they treat that premise and see it through.

That was the feeling I got when I came across I Hear the Sunspot - its premise was so unlike any of the other manga I’ve read or watched by then (and that still holds true now) that I knew I had to put it on my to-read list right away. I might've been a bit hasty with my decision, but I figured it was worth it to see just how the dynamic of a hard-of-hearing boy and his note-taker plays out. And in any case, if I didn’t like the first volume, I could just drop it, right?

Thankfully, this first volume exceeded all of my expectations. As I mentioned above, Kohei is a college student experiencing hearing problems that makes it difficult for him to take down notes in his class. Because of a chance meeting, he runs into Taichi, a student from a different department who takes on various jobs to make ends meet. Thanks to Kohei’s great lunches and Taichi’s insatiable appetite, they form an agreement where Taichi takes notes in class and Kohei gives him free lunches in return.

While it’s easy to see this as the start of a back-and-forth that leads to an eventual romance, the story takes a very interesting turn before talking about Kohei’s attraction to Taichi. Because his disability came so suddenly to him - as opposed to something he was born with - Kohei had a hard time adjusting to his new reality, which severely affected his social life and emotional well-being. Because of this, and amplified by some unfortunate encounters with his old schoolmates, Kohei decides to shut himself off from the world, even going as far as to calling people who don’t share his disability as living on “the other side.”

Taichi picks up on Kohei’s self-induced seclusion rather quickly and proceeds to help him break out of it in any way he can, whether it’s bringing him to the school’s cafeteria or inviting him to play in a baseball game. Despite what others say about him - Kohei is said to have very good looks but his cold personality drives most people away - Taichi doesn’t think twice about giving Kohei the tools to slowly break down the walls he built around himself.

There’s also something to be said about how Taichi doesn’t really have a “solid” reason to act like this to Kohei - he doesn’t have a disabled family member, and initially, he’s not at all doing it out of infatuation. Rather, he’s simply reaching out to Kohei and helping him deal with his issues because, in his mind, that’s the right thing to do. The most concrete reason he says in the story is that he wants to see him smile more, and even then, this is already after several instances where he goes out of his way to help Kohei with his issues. Taichi is just, quite frankly, someone who’s sensitive enough to recognize that Kohei has different needs but doesn’t alienate him because of them.

I’ve found characters like Taichi incredibly rare among the stories I've read so far, as most drastic actions like what he does come with tragic backstories or a flashback scene that shows that they’ve been pining for the other long before the events of the story even started. To have a character who’s just genuinely kind and shows a lot of empathy is honestly very refreshing, and it’s a character trait that I think this story really nails down. Taichi might have his own flaws that he has to work through - though that’s given more focus in later volumes - but you can never take his open-mindedness and caring personality away from him.

And it’s in that context where Kohei’s attraction begins, and you can’t blame him - here’s a literal gift from the heavens who suddenly understands what he’s going through and doesn’t ridicule him for it. But with his newfound attraction, he finds himself once again in unfamiliar social territory. Unfortunately, because of a misunderstanding involving a girl, this leads him to going back to his old ways of secluding himself from the world - and secluding himself from Taichi.

Thankfully, Taichi is having none of that and proceeds to talk to him about it - both indirectly and directly - which eventually leads to Kohei confessing his feelings and kissing Taichi. The volume is already ending at this point, though it gives us a curious little bonus chapter that shows Taichi admitting to himself that he didn’t necessarily hate the kiss. It’s a curious way to end the volume, and it’s even more interesting when you find out in the afterword that this is how the story was originally going to end. I’m thankful that it didn’t go down that route, but if it did, I do think that I’d find it a nice note to end on, as it lets the reader fill in the blanks now that we know that Kohei's feelings of affection aren’t necessarily one-sided.

While there isn’t a lot to work with in terms of the romance - which the mangaka even alludes to in the afterword - I Hear the Sunspot more than makes up for it with how it presents its two main leads. They’re very fascinating, and in Kohei’s case, it’s not just because he has a disability. Rather, it’s how the story uses this disability to shape his personality and present his flaws, and it does so in a very believable way that it never feels like he was made hard-of-hearing for the sake of it. And, after all, that’s the type of treatment that Taichi would want for Kohei.

Random thoughts that I couldn’t fit elsewhere:

I should definitely note that I’m going into this story as someone who doesn’t have a physical disability, so my praise for the narrative does miss out on a lot of context that someone who does have a similar condition as Kohei would pick up on. Most of the other comments I’ve read online have good things to say about how Kohei is presented, and I definitely agree with them, but I’m of course curious how someone closer to Kohei’s situation would react to his portrayal here.

You’ll notice that I don’t talk about any other characters outside of the main pair in this review, and that’s because the story doesn’t actually give too much focus on anyone besides the two of them. I find future volumes actually having the opposite issue of having a bunch of characters sharing the limelight, and I do think I prefer how this first volume deals with its cast. There are some side characters thrown in to add conflict as well as flesh out dynamics, and while I would’ve wanted to find out more about some of them, I do think streamlining the plot to just Kohei and Taichi was a good call here.

It becomes a more apparent image in later volumes, but like I mentioned above, Kohei refers to Taichi in an early chapter as someone who lives on “the other side.” The same chapter depicts these two sides in a few ways, but the most notable one is a pair of curtains. And to see Kohei open these curtains at the very end of the chapter is such a powerful image that I really wanted to highlight it.

Thanks for reading! I still think I Hear the Sunspot has one of the most unique premises of the genre, and it definitely doesn’t disappoint on the execution side. I have a review lined up for the next volume in the series - Theory of Happiness - though I’m still going back-and-forth about whether or not I should review the three Limit volumes.

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

“The Batman” (2022) movie review:

SHORT REVIEW

It was better the second time around. But even then, I think Telltale did the same story but better. I give it a 7/10. 

LONG REVIEW

Okay, before I get into the main review, let me just say that both times watching this movie have been...interesting. The first time, I watched with my sister, my cousin, and my sister’s best friend. The second time, it was a date (I know I should’ve picked a more fun movie, but whatever). 

My sister was thoroughly unimpressed to the point where she legitimately told me that “Uncharted” was a better movie. My sister’s best friend and my cousin were also not as impressed, but a little more forgiving (my cousin’s main criticism was that Bruce Wayne’s characterization was weak). My date...well, she thought it was a decent movie, but was not a fan of some of Bruce’s characterization (mainly his forcefulness to Selina) and thought the third act was a bit messy. 

The reason I’m bringing all this up is because, in both instances, I was the one who came out liking the movie the most. I was the one who was willing to give the movie the benefit of the doubt, despite its shortcomings. But even then, I’m not as wowed by “The Batman” as a lot of people were. 

Is it a great Batman movie? Sure. Is it the best Batman movie? Honestly, it’s a strong no for me, I still give that title to “The Dark Knight”. Is it deserving of the hype? Uh...sure? I mean, I thought it was fine. Here, let’s get into my thoughts then. Just a disclaimer, this is just my personal opinion, feel free to disagree if you want. 

What I will agree with is that it is a great DETECTIVE Batman movie. I can’t believe it took Warner Bros this long to make a movie where Batman, the World’s Greatest Detective, does some legitimate detective work. Snyder had the chance to do that, but even he blew it when he gave all the detective work to Lois Lane (which is fine since she’s a reporter, but point still stands). We only got snippets of Bruce’s detective skills in previous movies, so it’s great that we now have a full-length movie where that’s the focus. 

The acting was also pretty good. Robert Pattinson absolutely owns the role. He’s what you expect of a young Batman who hasn’t moved on past his parents’ deaths. Basically, he’s emo and moody as hell, which is far removed from the fun, playboy depictions of him in the past, but works for this version. 

Zoe Kravitz is a really good Selina Kyle. Colin Farrell is the best onscreen depiction of The Penguin I’ve ever seen. I love how he’s just a gangster with no other weird add-ons to his character like in other depictions (looking at you, Batman Returns). Paul Dano really excelled in his depiction of this alt-right, QAnon, Reddit/4chan user version of Riddler. There was just something so realistically disturbing about his depiction that really made his character shine.

And, of course, the rest of the cast did great as well. I’d name everyone individually, but this post will end up being too long if I do.

Last but not least, I love the overall “feel” of the movie. I liked the aesthetics of Gotham City, the choice of music, and the tone. It really was a film noir, but with Batman as the main protagonist. There were even times where I felt like I was reading Sin City again, or the Batman comics written by Frank Miller before he lost his mind. 

Now, with all the positives out of the way, what did I not like about this movie?

Well...this is sort of a biased point, but, I already seen this Batman story. Does anyone here remember Telltale’s Batman? It’s not even similarities anymore, the movie straight up lifted concepts from the game. We have a terrorist villain trying to “expose” the corrupt elites of Gotham, a young rookie Batman teaming up with a reluctant Catwoman, and Thomas Wayne having a corrupt past. While this isn’t a deal-breaking criticism, it did kind of kill some of the enthusiasm I had going into the movie, especially since I thought the game did the same story but better. 

Bruce’s characterization was a bit dodgy. While I enjoy Pattinson’s emo, moody take on Batman, it feels like you don’t really get to know Bruce until the Thomas Wayne reveal. For most of the movie, Bruce is just this blank slate who you only know about because of other incarnations of the character. Bruce doesn’t get “developed”, he just does his investigations and moves from point A to point B without really dwelling on things. 

My cousin summarizes it like this: “Robert Pattinson is all Batman, no Bruce Wayne.”

Even though the detective aspect was strong in this movie, the actual mystery was...meh? Surprise, surprise, the overarching villain of the movie turns out to be the big bad mob boss. The guy who was obviously evil turns out to be the cause of everything. There was so much time dedicated to the reveal of the Riddler’s rat, but I thought it was plainly obvious with how the movie set him up. The only reveal that actually had any bite was Selina’s dad being Carmine Falcone, other than that, the mystery was a bit lacking.

Even the final plan felt a bit predictable. Speaking of the final plan, that leads me into the main part of the movie that disappointed me...the final act.

First off, I want to make it clear that I’m not one of those guys who NEEDS a big showdown between the hero and villain. I actually like that Riddler got stopped before the big climax, especially since he’s not a physical guy. A fight between him and Bats would end in one punch, that doesn’t make for an interesting showdown. My problem with the climax is that it just feels sloppily written, like they ran out of time in writing the scene. 

First, I didn’t buy the appearance of the Riddler militia. I get that the movie was going for a “social media icon” version of Riddler, but the actual militia didn’t get a proper build-up. At least in “The Dark Knight”, you saw Joker recruiting his troops, and in “Joker”, you saw how Arthur slowly built up his reputation in order to inspire people to join his cause. Riddler makes a few vlogs, you see some people comment on his vlogs, and then bam, he now has a fully-equipped militia ready to do his bidding. It just didn’t feel natural, like we were missing a scene or two. 

The adrenaline shot scene felt a bit random. I guess they were trying to show just how far Bruce was willing to go to protect Selina, but the scene didn’t really go anywhere. You could’ve just cut to the Riddler-henchman saying, “I’m vengeance” and the scene would flow the same. 

Batman cutting the electric wire also didn’t really go anywhere. I felt like the writers were trying to show that Batman was willing to risk his life to save the people, but they undermined that point by just having Batman pop up out of the water right after he got electrocuted. They could’ve just cut to Batman leading the people to safety with his Bat-flare. 

And, overall, as a final act, it just felt weak. Selina didn’t really do much aside from beat up one bad guy. Commissioner Gordon pulled the mayor to safety and...that was about it. Batman beat up a bunch of no-name goons. Compared to the rest of the movie, the final act felt like a letdown since the main payoff was a fight scene that went on just a little too long and could’ve used some edits.

You know what this final act reminded me of? “WandaVision”. Yeah, I know I’m using a Marvel property to make a comparison, shut up and hear me out. The best part of that show was the mystery and figuring out what the hell was going on in Westview. This is why the finale is considered a disappointment since the payoff to that mystery was your standard, MCU fight scene. All the nuance and weirdness that made the series strong was missing from that finale.

Same with “The Batman”. The movie was at its best when it was a mystery, film noir. The movie went downhill after the main threat was caught and the mystery solved, leaving only a fight scene that could only end one way. It felt like a fight scene that needed to be there only because action movies have this unwritten requirement to have an ending showdown. 

Now, with all this being said, I want to reiterate that I thought the movie was good. It was a pretty good movie, especially since it’s the first live-action Batman movie to really get into the nitty gritty of detective work. But it’s a flawed Batman movie...which is fine! Just because I don’t think it’s a masterpiece doesn’t mean it’s a bad movie! I think it’s a fine movie for what it is, but I feel like it could’ve been improved in some parts, that’s all I’m saying. 

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

Blurb #9

Pairing- Spencer Reid x Female Reader

CW- none

Author’s Note- this comes from this ask by @leahblackk thanks so much for this love!! it was so much fun to write 💛 also sorry if it looks a little wonky I’m on mobile!!

Word Count— 2K (not really a blurb)

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Studies show that the music we listen to at 14 years old is the most influential on our personality and development. Naturally, there’s some exceptions to this. Spencer, for one, tended to listen to classical music or the Beach Boys records his mother had around the house as a teenager. He still can’t listen to jazz without the bittersweet memories of Ethan coming back to haunt him. His music taste, in his opinion, didn’t really develop until Derek made him listen to his CDs on rides during their commute.

It wasn’t until he met his neighbor, Y/N that he learned just how impactful music can be on someone’s life. Spencer, despite Derek and Penelope’s efforts, doesn’t really enjoy modern music. There’s one expectation to that though: Y/N. Everytime she drags him over for late night dinners and movie nights, she always ends up putting a Taylor Swift album on her vintage record player. It’s like a ritual that either comforts her, hypes her up, or softens her heartbreak. Through the months that they’ve been friends, Spencer’s come to enjoy the music nights. There’s something about the way that she sings about love and life that is so familiar to Spencer. The day he realized, it hit him like a ton of bricks. Y/N makes all those magical, heartwarming, Taylor Swift songs make sense.

So everytime he goes over to her apartment, before he knocks he’ll listen for the music. It’s hard to not let his profiling instincts kick when he does this. Thanks to his eidetic memory, Spencer can recognize any of the songs with only a couple seconds of the lyrics.

On a sunny Monday, Spencer listens closely for the record player. He can hear the upbeat, dance tunes of New Romantics. Okay, he thinks. If Y/N is listening to that song, she’s probably happy. So he knocks on the door, a big smile on his face ready to listen to the happiest Taylor Swift songs with the girl he’s pining for and try not to reveal just how much he wants her to love him back.

“Spence! Come on, we’re dancing” Y/N shouts loudly above the music. Spencer doesn’t want to burst her bubble by telling her he doesn’t dance, so he takes her hand and dances his heart away.

In between the jumpy and laughter the song shifts. Y/N must be playing it from her Alexa because the next song is from a different album, Paper Rings comes on next. A song dedicated to the kind of love that probably makes the most sense to Spencer. He’d marry Y/N without any kind of ring- and that’s a terrifying thought.

“I love this song!” Y/N says, closing her eyes and dancing wildly, “You like this one too, right Spence?” she says above the loud music.

Spencer, unable to fully articulate how much he loves this song, decides to grab Y/N by the hand and twirl her around and around. She’s laughing and smiling, happy as she could be. Spencer’s thoughts shift from how beautiful she looks, to how easy this is. How simple loving her could be, but how hard telling her is.

The music slows, turning to Lover, a song that Spencer has dreamt of dancing with Y/N to on a white veiled occasion several times. This must be her happy playlist, Spencer thinks as she pull him close. They’re slow dancing and if Spencer closes his eyes and quiets his mind, he can trick himself into thinking she loves him back. Afterall she holds him like she does.

“I like this one the best,” Spencer whispers, his eyes still closed as he and Y/N sway to the beat of the song, “It’s comforting,” he explains.

“It’s a good wedding song,” Y/N says, resting her head against his shoulder, “like a first dance song,”

“It is,” Spencer says, “It’s actually in the proper beats per second to be a waltz, which is a common dance for a traditional first dance at a wedding,”

“Yeah,” Y/N says, pulling herself in closer to Spencer as she pets small circles into his soft cardigan. The spot where she touches leaves her mark; his heart has belonged to her for awhile now, but Spencer’s ready to give her whatever else she wants, “but dancing like this is also very nice,”

“Hmm,” Spencer says, not trusting himself to say anything else. The music switches again, and Spencer knows the song, probably before even Y/N. Dress comes on and Spencer really isn’t sure how he’ll get through listening to the sultry song that croons about pining after your best friend. Part of him seriously thinks he’s being stalked, because those songs perfectly encapsulate his love and his admiration for the girl next door.

“Oh, I got asked out on a date,” Y/N says, seemingly shocking Spencer out of his daydream, “at the coffee shop. His name is John, he seems nice,” she tells him, sounding a little nervous.

“That’s great, Y/N,” Spencer says, trying to put on a smile for his best friend, but fails to do so, “I’m happy for you,”

“Well it’s, you know. I think I just need to put myself out there and stop waiting around for my wild dreams to come true. Because after all your wildest dreams are just that, dreams,” she says, a little sadly.

“Call me after, Y/N, just to make sure you get home safe,” Spencer requests, he squeezes her hand, in what he hopes can be seen as a friendly gesture, despite him not wanting to let go.

“Of course, Mr. FBI,” Y/N teases, “Alexa, shut up! Hey, Spence, you want to order pizza. It’s been like a week since I watch Long Pond and I’ve got that itch that only listening to This Is Me Trying while stuffing my face with pizza and white wine can fix,”

“Sure, Y/N,” Spencer says, smiling through his heartbreak. He tries to not let Y/N see the tears that prickle in the corners of his eyes when the 1 comes on. It would have been fun, if he could have been Y/N’s “1”. Even in heartbreak, Taylor Swift can capture exactly what Spencer feels.

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He almost didn’t bother checking by her apartment because he knew it’s her date with Jake or John, or whatever his name was. Spencer’s not a man to get jealous, he knows that Y/N doesn’t owe him her love just because he loves her. He knows that, but that doesn’t lessen the hurt of her falling for someone other than him.

As he walks by, Spencer’s ears catch the music coming from her apartment. He hears the unrecognizable twangy strum of the guitar and knows it’s going to be back news. Without thinking, Spencer rumages into his pocket, looking for his spare key to Y/N’s apartment. He unlocks the door and is greeted by Y/N’s cat, August, meowing at the door.

“Where’s our girl?” Spencer says, picking up the cat as he slips off his shoes, “hey, Y/N. It’s Spencer. I heard the music and I just thought I’d check in. I thought you were going out on your date?” he asks, finding Y/N curled up on the couch, with piles of tissues littered around her.

“Please, Spence. I’m a mess. I don’t want anyone to see me like this, especially you,” Y/N tells him, mopping her eyes up and petting her lap for August to jump up.

“Hey, hey, honey. You don’t have to worry about being a mess in front of me, I already think you’re amazing,” Spencer says, softly. He tries to gracefully avoid the spoiled tissues, he might be in love with Y/N, but he’s not in love with her used tissues.

“He-he stood me up,” Y/N stutters as a new wave of tears floods her face. Spencer leans over, shutting Alexa off. The sorrow, regretful tunes of Dear John turn off, leaving Spencer with the thought that it probably was an appropriate song to choose.

“I don’t even know why I try any more, Spence” she says, leaning into his body as he puts a comforting and protective arm around her upper half, “it’s useless. I’m doomed to be alone,”

“That’s not true, Y/N,” Spencer says, mumbling into her hair, “not at all. You’re amazing. You’re kind and so smart. You’re beautiful and you have great taste in music. Anybody would be lucky to date you,” he finishes, forgetting himself for a second as he kisses her hair. She smells like green apples and ivory soap.

“You’re just saying that because you’re my friend,” Y/N says. The emphasis on ‘friend’ giving Spencer a little hope at what she is subtly implying.

“What-what if I wasn’t? What if I wasn’t saying this as just a friend?” Spencer asks, daring to be bold and brave for once in his life. He couldn’t be bold and brave for Y/N, then who is he?

She must be thinking, because Y/N doesn’t say anything. Spencer’s mind instantly switches into full gear, thinking of how he’d get out of here all while sparing his feelings.

“Please don’t say those things, Spencer. Don’t say those things unless you mean it,” Y/N tells him, her voice sounding cold and far off, like she’s trying to put some distance between themselves to protect herself. Spencer’s mind ventures to take it as a good thing, when she doesn’t physically distance herself. She decides to stay with Spencer’s arms wrapped around her upper half and his hands drawing shapes on her back.

“I mean it, Y/N. I really do mean it,” Spencer says, sounding terrified, but feeling braver than ever. “I’d never lie to you about how you make me feel. Not anymore at least,” he explains, waiting for Y/N to respond.

“Can I show you something?” Y/N ask, her voicing sounding an awfully lot like Spencer’s with the mix of fear and tension and love fighting for dominance.

“Of course,” Spencer says, nodding into her hair and letting her go.

He watches and waits as she grabs her phone from the coffee table. Y/N launches her music app, but covers her phone so Spencer can’t see which playlist she’s choosing. Y/N has very curated Taylor Swift playlists kko that help her to either middle through her dark days or celebrate her happy ones.

The music starts and just within the first few notes Spencer can tell which song is playing. “Gold Rush,” he asks, of course getting it correct and making Y/N smile.

“I knew I kept you around for a reason,” Y/N says, scooting in closer to Spencer so his chin rests over her head. “I don’t think you’ve heard this playlist yet,” she says, handing him her phone.

Spencer looks at the phone, reading the playlist title Songs That Remind Me of Spencer, but ends up having to do a double take.

“This song always reminded me of you, Spence. I think it just captures how beautiful you are and how scared I am that you’ll find someone that will make you feel that way. Someone that’s more beautiful and better for you—“

Spencer can’t hear it anymore so he does something that was only a figment of his imagination: he kisses Y/N. He holds her head in his hands, brushing gently on her temples. It’s wonderful and magical, and Spencer thinks that he could kiss her for his whole life. He wants to know what makes her whimper and whine or make her flush. He wants to know everything about her because he is her 1, just as she is his.

“You made a playlist for me?” Spencer says, breaking away from Y/N’s lips to kiss her face. All over her forehead, her cheeks and eyes. He kisses her like he can’t get enough and is only encouraged by Y/N giggles for approval.

“Of course I did, Spence. You’re just everything to me and I couldn’t quite say it myself. So I left it up to the best songwriter I know,”

“I’ll make you one, today. Tomorrow, everyday,” Spencer says, kissing Y/N’s hands and wrists, “I just want to make you happy and know how loved you are. Because I love you, Y/N” Spencer says

“Spence,” Y/N says, not quite able to articulate how much she loves him, kisses his forehead, “I love you. God. I love you so much. And I may or may not have re-written Hey Stephen as Hey Spencer,”