#and finally i have a clear picture of them and-
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PRINCESS TREATMENT
ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤh. joshua x fem!reader ⪩⪨
01.ㅤۗㅤ𝙼ember . ⎯⎯⎯ joshua.
02.ㅤۗㅤ𝙲𝚆 . ⎯⎯⎯ multiple pet names, possessive thoughts, mentions of blowjobs(m.) and sex, just a very gentle guy who loves his girl more than anything.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua whose instagram is filled to the brim with pictures of his beautiful girl, sometimes he forgets to tag you but it’s okay because it takes no sherlock holmes to figure out your username since he only follows your account and a naruto fanpage.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who wants you to meet his parents in less than a month into the relationship, it’s extremely important to him to make it as clear as possible that he is serious about you, leaves no room for overthinking at all, always a step ahead of you in the ���would you still love me if i was a worm?” department, the best boy indeed.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who would rather take a bullet than let you pay for literally anything, because how dare you even suggest paying for your own things? as if you don’t know the only reason he works so hard it’s exactly so he can pamper you endlessly? the absolute nerve of you, better get on your knees and start apologizing.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who is the sassiest and most dramatic guy you’ve ever been with, but can not for the life of him handle the thought of you doing any work at all, in every aspect, which, ironically, sometimes makes you work even harder to get what you want.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who makes it the world’s most difficult challenge to accept receiving head from you for the first time, he enjoys being the one doing all of the work to make you feel good, he just couldn’t see how blowing him off would please you at all so he keeped denying(while completely ignoring the tent forming rapidly in his grey sweatpants) until you begged too sweetly, so softly, looking at him with so much adoration and love, like you wanted nothing more than to please him, he could have finished right there but instead he shook his head and sat down in the bed, ready to give his princess anything she could ever want, just like he promised he would! even if what she wanted was to kneel in front of him and try to fit his thick cock into her little mouth for a while.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who uses every opportunity that stumbles across his way to show off his huge arms, it’s a win-win scenario, he gets to feel all hot and manly and you get to hold onto your boyfriend’s strong biceps everywhere you go and get carried on bride style after a night out that, honestly, didn’t even leave you that drunk, but since he offered to carry you, who would ever say no?
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who adores your nails and is always super excited to see the results of your nail appointments, asks for pictures during the whole process, sends you food when it’s taking too long, and finally when the nails are done, he’s there to pick you up in his shiny car, more than ready to do the last step of your nail day, which is putting them to the test, the scratch test.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who just can’t help but adore when you leave him all marked up, he loves it, and how can you blame him? was he supposed to be normal about having proof straight on his body of just how good he made you feel last night? how could you even consider he'd do such a thing? this man is not normal about you in general.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who knows your entire wardrobe like the back of his hand, half of it because he bought it, the other half because of how often he’s watching you, definitely a “i look at you more often than you think” kinda guy. he’s very proud of just how well he knows his baby.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who remembers all of your food preferences and orders, knows all of your allergies, all of your icks and all of your friend’s gossips because he’s just so well behaved! he won't tell anyone, he never would! he's your joshy! you can trust him to keep all of your secrets, forever.
⪩⪨ boyfriend!joshua who’s very open about the fact that he wants to marry you, live the rest of your lives together, maybe with a kid if you’re into that, maybe just dogs if that’s better for you, he got his own wishes when it comes to creating a family, but at the end of the day; this man has one priority, and she has a name. whatever is best for you, it’s the best for him.
⪩⪨ husband!joshua who no matter how long it has passed since you got married, has not lost even a little bit of his obsession with you. his precious flower, his cute little thing, his darling, his sweet girl, that’s all you’ll ever be to him, all his to love and protect, forever.
#seventeen fanfic#seventeen smut#seventeen imagines#seventeen imagine#seventeen scenarios#joshua x reader#joshua hong x reader#joshua smut#hong joshua smut#joshua fluff#seventeen drabbles#seventeen reactions#hong joshua x reader
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Romance Clichés With: Idia Shroud
Cliché: The Dramatic Save
Others: Leona ; Vil ; Azul ; Kalim
The thing about Idia is that he’s very used to lurking in the background. Life is much simpler that way. But ever since you’d started spending more time with him, he’d found himself in the wildest, most "otome game" situations imaginable. And today? Today topped them all.
You’d been standing together in the courtyard, him telling you about his latest game finds, hands shoved into his pockets as he tried not to fidget too much. It was rare he got to hang out with someone he, uh, actually wanted to hang out with, so his nerves were pinging off the charts.
That’s when it happened.
With zero warning, a large, heavy textbook teetered off the edge of a windowsill above and began its rapid descent towards Idia’s head. He didn’t notice; he was too busy stammering about his latest high score. But you did.
In one swift move, you threw yourself across the space between you and practically flew through the air, hands outstretched like some overdramatic action hero.
You managed to get between him and the descending missile (okay, just a textbook, but in the moment, it was deadly), and though the impact wasn’t as dramatic as you’d pictured, you still managed to shield him with your entire being, shoving him safely aside.
By the time he realized what was going on, you were already fussing over him. “Oh my gosh, are you okay?! Did it hit you anywhere?”
He blinked, processing what just happened as you started checking his head for bumps, squinting at his shocked face. “Uh… w-what?” he stammered, brain catching up about three seconds too late. “Did… did you just… jump in front of me?” The look of awe on his face was equal parts adorable and ridiculous.
“Well, obviously!” You laughed, still fussing, hands on his shoulders. “Are you alright?”
Idia’s mouth opened and closed as he tried to process the sheer amount of romance that just smacked him in the face. You, his crush, his dream come to life, had gone full protagonist, for him. It was like the best tropes had all collided in his brain at once, and it was overwhelming in the best way possible.
“N-No one’s ever done something like that… f-for me…” he mumbled, cheeks reddening as he stared at you with this helpless, smitten look.
You tilted your head, a soft smile crossing your face. “Well, I’d do it again if it meant keeping you safe, Idia.”
Somewhere in his brain, the confetti cannons were going off. The “love meter” hit max. The screen flashed “TRUE ENDING” in bold, sparkly letters. He knew it was all real, but a tiny part of him felt like he’d accidentally triggered some hidden route with a secret character, and that character was you.
And before he could stop himself, the words tumbled out of his mouth in a rush. “I think I’m in love with you. Like, maybe have been for a while. You’re like, the one or something, and—oh my god, why am I saying this out loud—”
He clamped a hand over his mouth, wide-eyed, as if he could just take it back if he tried hard enough. But instead, he saw you looking at him, your smile widening as you took his hand, gently pulling it down.
“You mean it?” you asked, a bit of awe creeping into your voice.
He couldn’t look at you, his eyes darting everywhere except your face as he mumbled, “Y-Yeah, I mean, yeah, I do. I can’t believe you’re real, honestly, this feels like a fever dream, but—”
Before he could talk himself out of it, you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, quick and sweet. It was enough to short-circuit his brain, and when you pulled back, he just blinked, stunned, frozen like his internal processing unit had just maxed out.
“Does that answer your question?” you teased, unable to hold back a little laugh at his flustered expression.
“Uh-huh,” he finally managed, a dopey smile creeping onto his face as his brain rebooted. “Y-Yeah… yes.” He cleared his throat, trying to seem cooler, but the blush on his cheeks was a dead giveaway.
And as you both stood there, your hands still linked, he felt like the luckiest player in the world—like he’d stumbled upon the rarest, sweetest route of them all, and he wasn’t letting go anytime soon.
Masterlist
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twst#twisted wonderland#idia x reader#idia shroud x reader#idia shroud x you#idia shroud#twst idia#idia
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NNN day 4 | Snow-day Magic
summary: december has finally arrived, snow has fallen and your daughter has never been more excited for your annual snow day with your husband Matthew matching her energy and enthusiast to which you fit right into, being the mother of both people.
warnings: FLUFF, nothing! Just cutesy fluff with dad!matt and his cute daughter 😋
authors note: day 4 lets gooo, sorry if this was kinda rushed and if a little bad but I was just pretty busy today and had to kinda rush this while I have free time, my friend @/strnilolover also did a snow day for nnn with chris and yall should go check that out too, I hope y’all enjoy this one
no nut november | masterlist | guestlist
My daughter, Lucy hops up and down in excitement while I zip up her pink winter jacket and slip on her mitten's to keep her from catching a cold when playing in the snow, I chuckle at how much energy she has inside of her little body. "When can we go play in the snow, mommy?" She questions impatiently, already wanting to go play in the snow. "In just a minute, dear. We have to wait for daddy to get here." I answer softly, standing up just as Matthew comes around the corner. Immediately walking over to Lucy and spinning her around in the air as she giggles, Matt seeming just as excited as our daughter does. "Soo... who wants to go have a cool awesome snow day?" He asks playfully, tickling Lucy's stomach while she errupts in an immediate "me!" response, speaking each syllable between soft laughter.
The room is filled with laughter and excitement, I glance at Matt holding and playing with Lucy and admire the amount of how adorable the sigh is. Quietly I reach for my phone in my back pocket to take a photo of both of them, “Can you both pose for a second?” I say while raising the phone upwards and getting them in the picture, they both do a silly face and a sweet smile spreads on my lips. After we all put on our cozy shoes, me and Matt grab each one of Lucy’s hands and make sure she doesn’t slip on some of the more slippery parts do the ground.
Creating a snowman
I keep supervision over both of them as I watch from a slight distance as Matt helps Lucy create a snow ball for the base of the snowman, sweet praises fall from his mouth when Lucy does something herself. When they have all of the snow balls they made all on top of each other, Lucy’s small hands push at Matt’s chest and try to get him away from the snowman now. “Don’t need daddy’s help anymore, I want to do it myself!” She exclaims and keeps pushing at his chest, landing his bottom on the cold snow. He gasps dramatically, putting on a fake-offended expression as he gets up from the ground and bends down to Lucy’s height. “Oh I’m severely offended, you don’t need me anymore?” She nods and points to where I am currently standing and gestures for him to go stand next to me.
He laughs and stands next to me as we both now admire our daughter assembles the rest of the snowman, “Damn she’s such an adorable child. She got those eyes from you.” I state, placing my head on his shoulder and supporting myself on his side as one of his arms snake up to my waist. “Yeah, y’know I have a cool idea in my head.” He shared, looking mysteriously into the distance to give it more of an ominous vibe and just him trying to act tough. “And what would that be?” I replied, my curiosity becoming spiked now with growing questions about what the idea could be. “Having another child.” “That’s your mysterious idea?” “Yeah, obviously.”
Making snow angels
My back is immediately met with coldness making me flinch slightly as I lay down with Matt helping Lucy down in the snow to which she also flinches from the sudden hit of coldness to her back. She starts moving her legs and arms back and forth and I follow suite, clearing the snow from under our limbs and leaving only prints of our clothes and a thin layer of snow. Matt helps me and Lucy get up from the ground without destroying the snow angels completely, we stand at the feet of them and Lucy tugs on Matts pants and points excitedly at her snow angel. “Look daddy, me and mommy made snow angels!”
I kneel down next to her and brush off the snow that was left behind and didn’t fall off, Matt does the same and kneels down next to me. “Both of you are my little angels already.” He admired, pulling both of us into a big hug but Lucy takes it a bit too seriously and jumps onto Matt’s chest which ends up with all of us laying on the cold snow, laughing at how serious she got about it. “Woah there, little girl. You’re a little feisty thing, hm?” Matt speaks softly, a soft chuckle bubbling in Lucy’s throat not really knowing exactly what he means as he softly tickles her side. “Looks like you got that from your mother” He chuckles as I jokingly poke the side of his waist, making him slightly jump at the sudden gesture. “What was that for?” “It’s just a joke.” I say innocently before he returns the action to which my body jumps, all while our giggly daughter watches us play fight as it only fuels her sweet laughter.
Guestlist!
| - @sturnioloblues - @sturnsxplr-25 - @luvvs4chriss - @sturniolosweetheart33 - @pussypie456 - @choclatestarfishwithahat - @venusxsturnio - @bagsbyclair0 - @sturnstvs - @dykes4chris - @hoe4matt - @cayleeuhithinknot - @strnilolover - @marrykisskilled - @phone4pills |
#✰ ! 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍 🦈 ! ✰#✰ ! 𝐕’𝐬 𝐍𝐨 𝐍𝐮𝐭 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 ! ✰#✰ 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 ✰#fluff#dad!matt#father and daughter#dad x daughter#snow#snow day#december#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#matthew bernard sturniolo#christopher owen sturniolo#nicolas antonio sturniolo#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo#sturniolo fandom#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#sturniolos#sturniolo fluff#no nut november#no warnings
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Ok sorry if I'm taking up some time but something related to a picture I saw has literally been on my mind and I need some sorta short fanfic about it 😭
So basically, Yandere Fantasy AU Bakusquad where they are all dragons (Except Bakugou being a Barbarian) and a traveler reader who is incredibly hurt so is under the care of them all.
I mainly want this because I recently broke my wrist (which is now healed up) and idk 😭🙏
The Lost Traveler
Yandere! fantasy Bakusquad x gn! reader
A/n: I kinda went off on this onw hehe but I hope it was worth the wait! I hope you enjoy!
Tw!⚠️: injuries, reader getting hurt, weapons, drowning, possessive and obsessive behavior, stripping off clothes (in a non sexual way ofc) nudity (if you count reader being in their undergarments, yandere behavior, and more don't read if you can't handle it
"After them!" You heard a man yell out to his group as they chased you, but you didn't look back you didn't want to look back your main priority was safety you looked around the woods to see if there was any hiding spot but to no avail, the men kept shooting their arrows towards you as you barely dodged them. You held on to your bag tightly you didn't know how you had come to this conclusion you just went into town trying to grab some things and these men tried to rob your mother's spellbook so you kicked one of them in the groin he released you from his grasp and you continued to run
"I got this" one of the men grabbed their bow and arrow, your eyes widened in horror as he aimed for your leg and you were getting ready to dodge untill a sharp pain hit you in your upper leg you screamed in agony and dropped to the floor clutching your foot the bandits all surrounded you chucking you grabbed the book tightly not wanting those monsters getting it
"Now, now, brat, why don't you be smart and give us the book, and we'll let you go"gt.he man had a devious grin on his facfaceu spat at him, "fuck you, you'll have to kill me 1st!" The bandits snicker and laughed "Very well then.." one of the men got a weapon and held itches towards your neck your eyes widen trying to squirm off from his grasp but he pinned you against the tree hard with a final attempt you kicked him in the groin with ur shoe his grasp became loose as he howled in pain now clutching his area kneeling, "you little shit..." the crew all held their swords at you you the began crawling backward with the book praying they'll be someone to protect you
You then began to slip on something; you quickly looked behind you to see a waterfall right behind you, you gasped, wanting to crawl back, but the bandits were in front. You were at a dead end "Nowhere, the run, little shit, just give us the book!" He sneered, you had to act fast for you and the book, you look at the waterfall again hesitant you began crawling closer and closer waterfall until you felt the cliff and the loud crashing water beneath you, one of the bandits snicker th t up to what you were about to do "don't do anything stupid ya hear just give us the damn book!" He shouted you looked at him with one last glare and let your whole body go holding the book tight while you fall
You closed your eyes ready for the impact and pain, you landed in the roaring water you desperately tried gasping for air using your good arm to swim back up for air but it'd currents were too strong you tried grabbing some sort of branch or rock but kept crashing into them hard your body began to feel tired and ur eyes droopy from all the pain and energy "is this how I die.." you thought as you slowly close your eyes surrendering to the wrath of the water as they took you
...
"Aha! Gotcha!" The dragon yelled as she caught a fish with her claws she examined the fish making sure it was big enough for her friends and place it in the bucket her stomach growled in hunger she looked down and then looked at the fish, "..one fish wouldn't hurt" mina looked both ways and all around when the coast was clear she grabbed a small fish and was about toneat until a voice called her "Pink scales you better not be eating our dinner like shitty scales!" The Man said angrily, "Ughh bakugo, it was just gonna be one!" Mina whined as she reluctantly dropped the fish
"One less of our dinner!" He scolded, taking the bucket and carrying it with him. "Plus, it looked like you already had some!" He looked at her with a hard glare as she smiled sheepishly the barbarian was about to yell at her until he spotted something floating in the water he shoved the dragon away to view it closer he realized that it was a human being floating around in the river katsuki quickly went in the river not caring about hid clothes getting dragging the human out of the water "it's that a human?! Are they breathing?" She shrieked looking worriedly and concerned
Katsuki then felt the human skin it was cold..katsuki then led his head toward its chest the heart was still beating but it was barely breathing.."Mina take the human to our cottage.." he ordered Mina nodded and quickly placed you on her back and transformed into her dragon form katsuki then hopped on her back and signaled her to fly, she then carefully launched into the air making sure nobody falls then soared through the sky
As they were soaring, Katsuki took the time to examine you; it seemed like you were not from here but maybe from another region judging by your clothes, and he didn't mention it, but there was a book in the human's hands. He observed it closely. It seemed like it was from a powerful being..but he didn't know where it was from, until then he may have to keep it for a while just in case for safety
Mina roared making Katsuki snap out of his thoughts when he looked up he realized that they were home he grabbed you and jumped off Mina while steam came out of her turning her back into her human form they carried the human to the house and placing them on the couch "Mina take off through clothes and check for bruises" Mina nodded she carefully took off your closes leaving you with only your undergarments on she blushed a but reminded herself to focus, the poor human was covered in red and purple bruises and had a broken wrist Mina gaze soften feeling pity for then poor human
"The human has a bunch of bruises and a broken wrist" Bakugo scoffed "that probably gonna take half of my healing power so I'm only gonna heal them on certain areas and patch up the others letting them heal themselves" bakugo then let Mina carry the unconscious human to give them a warm bath, bathing off the dirt and gunk in their hair and gently handling them with the best of her abilities the most she saw the bruises the more angrier she seems how dare someone could do this to a precious little thing when she was done she quickly wrapped them up in a towel and carry them in the bedroom where there were already a set of warm clothes for them to wear..
....
You were panicking all you could see was black you couldn't move your body it was like you were wrapped in something, it was suffocating, you tried to scream but you couldn't hear your own voice nor you couldn't hear anything just emptyness and eerie silence, you wanted to get out of here you wanted to see if you have that spellbook you wanted to survive, are you even alive anymore?! You were breathing rapidly wondering what did you do you be in this hell
Then a soft humming rang in your ear it sounded...familiar like something your mother would do to comfort you when you were feeling ill or had a very bad day, the humming made you calm..peaceful even, your panicking began to die down as well as your breathing you squirm around trying to break free from whoever or whatever is trapping you but to no avail, then saw some light in your vision it became bigger and lighter...
You slowly opened your eyes, all you could see was a blurry red figure hovering over you humming the same tune you heard back there you blinked a couple of times to get your vision more clear, and there standing above you was a boy with red scales forming on his shoulders and large pointy like horns with red eyes staring the back at you, with a yelped you tried squirming away but her strong hands were keeping you still "Please don't struggle your weak at the moment" he said petting your hair softly trying to calm you down
"Where am i.." the red hair chuckled as if that was a silly question to ask "your home can't you tell?" He answered softly as he continued to hum confused you were about to ask what did he mean by that untill another voice could be heard "did the human wake up yet" there revealed a another dragon with blonde hair and a black lighting strike on he turned his attention towards you and his eyes brighten "they're so small!" He has as he poked your cheeks curiously wanting to feel what a human skin felt like "they're also soft as well!" He giggled happily the red haired dragon quickly swat his friends hand away as the dragon whined
"They're still healing Kaminari be gentle!" Kiri scolded him The yellow dragon softly glared at him jealous from the red dragon hogging you "would you stop fighting infront them? the poor thing is barely gaining conscious" there appeared a dragon with black hair scolding at the 2 dragons "now come on the foods almost ready" he said as he gaze at you with a soft smile the headed back to the kitchen ok now you were confused who were these people? Why are they're saying this is your new home? Are you going crazy or what
Your thoughts were then interrupted again with Kirishima picking you up and carrying you to the kitchen and plop you down to your chair you awkwardly thanked him as he happily sat down at his spot, that's when smell of the food hit your nostrils it smelled so good you even drooled a bit which you quickly wiped off with your arm embrassed hoping nobody noticed that "heh someone's hungry" the dragon away you assumed to be Sero said smirking at you as your face lit up in embrassament you looked away
"Well I haven't eaten in a few days of course I'm gonna be hungry" you protested as the black dragon chuckled "whatever you say sweets" he shrugged laying against the chair patiently waiting for the meal "dinners ready!" A loud booming voice was heard a blonde male with orange eye "Guess the little shit is awake" he grumbled "Katsuki language! Don't call the human that!" Kirishima scolded katsuki scoffed
"Don't fucking tell me what to do shitty hair you ain't the boss of me!" He said yelled the two started bickering back and forth while Kirishima wrapped his Strong arm around you protectively you tried pushing it off but it seems like he was too busy to noticed or he didn't care "boys stop arguing when our human is awake!" "Yea I bet they're starving right about now!" A purple dark then came in along with a bubbly pink dragon skipping in the kitchen the 2 boys shut themselves up and they then fix yourself and themselves a meal
it was cooked fish with a side of veggies the aroma was addictive making you go wild, fish wasn't always your favorite meal but those last few days of living off of eating berries and small animals this was a actual proper meal for you you devoured the food in seconds not noticing how the others were cooing and just adoring how cute you were, after the meal you were about to head yourself out grabbing your spellbook and thanking the kind people for the care untill a hand grabbed you by the shoulder
"And where the fuck are you going?" Bakugo said with a stern tone "Uh I'm going out I need to get back home" "in this condition? Your still hurt pumpkin no way we're gonna let you go out exposing yourself to the dangers" you didn't noticed jirou infront of the door now everyone else gathered around you looking weirdly at you...
"Why don't you stay for a few nights atleast untill your injuries healed!" Kirishima suggested you thought about it for a moment the trip back home would take rather long considering that you barely even know your way back they then carried you off to their bed all cuddling next to you
You were their human now you were a gift for them and them only those monsters are gonna pay for what they done to their little darling~
#yandere bnha#yandere ua#yandere x reader#tw yandere#yandere mha#bnha fluff#platonic yandere#romantic yandere#yandere bakusquad#yandere bakugo katsuki#yandere mina ashido#yandere sero#anime x reader#yandere fantasy#yandere my hero academia#yandere jirou#yandere kirishima#yandere denki kaminari#yandere harem#dark boku no hero#yandere fanfiction#yandere boku no hero academia#my hero academia oneshot#my hero academia x reader#my hero academia fanfiction#my hero acedamia#bakusquad x reader
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https://www.tumblr.com/ko-existing/766133693448372224/httpswwwtumblrcomko-existing7661320713789440?source=share
Ko, please, how do I stop being so desire driven? I’m not asking this as a lesson, but more like a genuine advice from person to person. I’m 100% this is what keeps me from truly seeing the bigger picture.
I tried many times to just let go and not care about outcomes or read the lessons thinking “yeah, this will make me get the things”, but I can’t. Even if I try to convince myself there’s something deep down saying I clearly still only care about the outcomes. It’s tiring not only because it keeps me walking in circles, but also because I experience episodes of pure joy cause “yes, I can get it, it’s easy” and then ones of pure depression thinking “this is bullshit, you’re understanding it all wrong and won’t get anything, deal with it. You’ll never get anything.” It’s always the extremes, you know? 08 or 80.
I tried to simply step back of everything and just move on with the knowledge I’ve got to see if my mind and thought process unfolds naturally and I stop feeling this incessant seeking for finally KNOWING true self instead of seeing as a belief, but I always end up falling on that depression phase and constant need for reassurance that “yes, you’ll get it”, but as you know, it never leads me to nowhere when I’m constantly reading, and asking, and seeking.
You say “step back and ponder” and say that when we encounter the silence it should be enough, but for me somehow is not and it frustrates me because logically should be enough, I mean, I’m literally being left with the nothingness, what else could I possibly need to understand, right?
I just wanna stop feeling limited, trapped and suffering and most importantly, I want to stop being the cause of all of this suffering. But I placed my desires as the ultimate happiness and this constant feeling of separation never goes away. Why is so simply to read and understand “everything is formless”, but when actually “practicing” and applying seems so absurd? God, I’ve been this way this whole year and I’m so sick of it.
To answer genuinely—you're thinking too much.
If you’re feeling caught in this cycle of extreme highs and lows, it might help to try sitting with your thoughts in a more observing way, which can give you a clearer view of what’s driving the whole process. And no, IT IS NOT A NECESSITY. It's a help to watch without getting lost in thoughts but it is NOT A MUST.
I've been on tumblr long enough to know what to expect from other anons reading this like "i thought meditation is not nevessary". No one is saying throw on an orange robe, head off to the himalayan mountains to sit on a rock in a cave, drink Bo cha, chew on Chülen, start fasting and chant " ཨོཾ་མ་ཎི་པདྨེ་ཧཱུྃ" (om mani padme hum) around the clock like it's your monastic lifestyle job.
So, again, I'm not saying this is a necessity or a “must-do”. Meditating, or simply Noticing, can help you see your thoughts without getting so wrapped up in each one—nothing more. There are different options like listening to a guided one or just background music/sounds like rain. I personally like it. So, If it helps, it helps. If it doesn't, see what does.
I've also been on Tumblr long enough to know how quickly people start labeling everything as a “method” or a requirement, so just to be clear again: I’m not saying any of that!
The main thing here is to relax this intense drive for outcomes. You can actually start looking at these desire-driven thoughts as just “passing content”—and yes, this practice can help. When a thought like “I need this outcome to be happy” pops up, instead of believing it automatically, you could take a step back and notice that it’s just a thought arising out of nowhere and passing into nowhere. Watching thoughts like this reminds you they don’t define you and have no reality to them.
Also, see if you can bring your attention back to what’s here without needing to grasp, judge, or chase. Every time you relax that urge for outcome, you’re giving yourself a chance to rest in something that isn’t tied to outcomes at all. " ".
Experience what’s beyond the cycle of “wanting” and “fearing.” Keep it simple, remember it’s a gentle, easy redirection rather than some heavy practice. Never force anything. If you don't want to do it, don't. And never overconsume.
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hey just so we're clear im still pissed that this gp was held at all. yes i got the result i wanted, im cheering clapping & hooting. yes it was a legendary drive by max (& by pierre & esteban too actually!!) BUT it was insanely risky. ppl could have DIED. also can we know why n*rris was fined half of what charles was? one of them said fuck & the other endangered LIVES. i genuinely don't understand? am i missing something? is fia owned by mclaren now? or is it the skyf1 virus? what's going on? also what happened at the driver's parade? what were charles & max yapping abt so insistently? charles & max teammates when? and max??? the absolute level of cunt served??? before, during & after the race??? LEGENDARY? ICONIC?? also since when is the whiny lil bitch who begs his teammate for a point & has three wins to his name allowed to call THREE TIME WORLD CHAMPION MAX EMILIAN VERSTAPPEN 'lucky'? and seriously how were there ZERO british reporters in the after race press conference? do they realise how bad that looks? omg. also. pierre & esteban finally smiling in each other's vicinity & being happy around each other 😭 childhood besties to rivals to maybe friends again 😭 WHY IS NELSON PIQUET STILL ALIVE?? hello what's going on i forgor what i was talking abt im so happy for alpine btw that cooldown room healed me. everything seems so much brighter without mclaren in the picture. most smiley cooldown room in a while tbh
#f1#anti lando norris#genuinely not even gonna read what i yapped abt all i know is that i despise n*rris#max verstappen#why are you posting abt the race almost a day after it's done you may ask I WAS PROCESSING OK#i needed to touch grass & live love laugh before i threw myself into madness again damn#what a race. had an aneurysm. moved me in several ways immensely#pierre gasly#esteban ocon#brazil gp 2024
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Mohg for the ask meme? 😅
Ah, Luminary Mohg my beloved...
favorite thing about them
Mohg's relations with love, both as a feeling and a concept. He's the person who has been denied any love (or any virtue) from the very beginning of his life, the person who has been abandoned, forsaken - and who was completely enraged and disgusted by it. So he believes that everyone deserves love, and care, and dignity - this is what he promises, sinserely, to his people, this is what his dynasty is for. And, of course, this is what leads to his downfall. His patron deity - an outer goddess of love and suffering - is a sadomasochistic, bloodthirsty abomination, but she grants strength, and how can Mohg deny the strength needed to protect those he loves? Or how can he not listen to his half-brother, who speaks of love, of compassion for all - even if his words are the charm that deprives Mohg of his own heart and will? He loved the world around him so much, no less, or maybe even more, than Morgott, but he refused to put up with its imperfections, its injustice and hypocricy - and first became a bloody monster himself, then lost it all to another monster, with similar motives, but much greater powers, which brings us...
least favorite thing about them
...to Mohg's death. Because he deserved better. Sure, he was a grim power, a servant of the goddess of torment, the leader of a murderous cult that killed and kidnapped people - and I can easily see why Mohg, despite all his original motives, deserved death... but not this death. Because it was such a cruel mockery of everything that was important to Mohg - love, dignity, freedom. It's not that I dislike the ending of his story because it's a bad plot or a writing issue... it's just too heartbreaking. Easily in the top-3 of all the FromSoft's Prepare-to-Cries for me.
favorite line
Ahh, I can see it, clear as day! The coming of our dynasty!
...I'm not crying (cries)
brOTP
Morgott, surely. Despite all of their contradictions, it was Morgott who had been with Mohg in the sewers all those years, it was Morgott who had lived through it all as Mohg had, it was Morgott - and only Morgott - who could truly understand him. Mohg might look up to Godwyn and love his dynasty with all his heart, but Morgott was his twin, his other half, inseparable. and all this is as true for Morgott himself as for Mohg
OTP
Ansbach, because my favourite trope strikes once again, lol. I've also seen some Radahn/Mohg post-dlc art... and honestly, there's something to it.
nOTP
Morgott. They're brothers, your honor! Also Miquella, because... well, I think I don't really need to explain it our lord Mohg deserved so much better
random headcanon
In terms of personality, Mohg resembles young pre-godhood Marika more than any other of her children. They also share an uncontrollable urge to make the least appropriate jokes in the least appropriate circumstances.
unpopular opinion
Mohg does care about the Golden Lineage, despite having founded his own dynasty. He's the eldest (after Godwyn's death) in his family, and he considers himself responsible for the rest of his relatives, feeling that he must protect them as Godwyn once did.
song i associate with them
Heather Dale - Prodigal Son (finally a musical association in a language that most people here understand!)
favorite picture of them
Once again, so many beautiful arts with Mohg. I guess for now I'll pick this art by motgarel
Also a bonus mention of this art with this amazing veiled!Mogh by pumpumkins
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getting really sentimental with the ocs today
#finally decided on some semi final designs using picrew and they look so good that it made me emotional#I've tried making them in picrew last year but it wasnt a very detailed one so its quite generic and i didnt like the designs much#i used baydews picrew this time and actually this was maybe the 3rd or 4th time ive attempted making my ocs#and finally i have a clear picture of them and-#ofc there's still limitations so I'll actually draw out their designs sometime and use the picrew designs as ref#but. holy shit ive had them with me for 7 years. maybe even more bc they used to be phineas and ferb ocs ☠️#these are my kids. and i finally have a kinda clear vision of what they look like#ive never- ive never been confident in my art to properly expand them in art so everytime i do end up backtracking#which sucks bc how can i call myself an artist if i do that?#but. god they look so good and obviously this is all for reference but. ive finally made progress that doesnt exist solely in my head 😭#theyre so good. i love them i love my ocs. i cant wait to tell their story. i hope i get to do that one day 🥹#sorry im emotional#not sharing the picrews here since theyre purely for ref and it just feels weird to post smth from a picrew maker#but man. im going thru so many emotions rn#happy 7 years. here's to number 8 🥳🎉#.txt
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⚔️👑
#14! silvil sweep!!!!!! finally!!!!!!!!!! ive actually wanted to draw this for them for Ages as an actual picture but iii dont have energy#im not rly a ship art girlie. im a lore art girlie. i like the conceptual stuff i like funky compositions w symbolism#anytime i get into a ship and hafta provide food for it its so HARD. if i ship something all i wanna do is lean into concepts instead grrrr#none of these doodles are ship specific. stating again to be oh so clear. but i did wanna draw this scenario anyways so this is the closest#my scrunklies. silver can improve vils fighting skill. his stance. his form. he can improve at acting in silvers wheelhouse i think its NEA#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#vil schoenheit#sry this one is late my friends happened to be in town so we last minute had dinner together. i laughed a lot it was nice#suntails
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THEY'RE HERE!!! MY BOYS!!
#pochacco and Pompompurin came!!#they're here now!!#if it wasn't clear the middle picture is mine!!#I'm so excited that i finally have them!#i wasn't originally planning on making a moodboard for this#then i did#this is the most self indulgent of all of them so far#but i hope you enjoy as always#sfw interaction only#moodboard#sfw agere#age regression#agere#sfw littlespace#agere moodboard#age dreaming#sanrio moodboard#sanrio build a bear moodboard
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stede is 'oh this place has something related to my interest i must go in immediately' autistic and izzy is 'if we deviate one inch from my plan for today i will murder someone' autistic
#stede wandering off into the forest to look at bugs was not on the schedule or any of izzys contingency schedules#new thing i think would fix izzy: a clear fucking plan#in the nebulous reunion timeline future i see izzy researching every port town they are gonna stop in HARD so he can figure out everywhere#stede + ed might possibly want to go and plan several routes for the day to keep himself calm in the inevitable chaos#(and yet somehow every time stede finds something he missed and they still go off script anyway)#(he tries to go separately around port from them one time and its a fucking disaster; someone gets stabbed; so he just resigns himself to#incredibly stressful port stops)#its not like stede + ed mean to do it!! theyre both awful for it individually and they just feed off each other#its ok because theyre very good at letting izzy have the deck Exactly how he wants it and scheduling as much big picture stuff as they can#with him#(when stede realises theyve been the cause of like. 65% of izzys stress they finally agree to let him redo the rigging as an apology and#they suddenly realise watching him buy the supplies that hes just as bad as them in his own way)#(he absolutely terrorizes the rope guy but they have never seen him so relaxed as when he was up there redoing all the lines)#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#israel hands#stede bonnet#you can pry autistic izzy away from my cold dead hands
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L'apprenti sorcier 2024.08.08 Satoko Miyahara & Stéphane Lambiel | The Sleeping Beauty by Pëtr Il'ič Čajkovskij, performed by Beatrice Berrut
#figure skating#stephane lambiel#satoko miyahara#l'apprenti sorcier#this program was so exquisite i can't stop thinking about it#my photos#after finally trying to take photos of actual skating I am very sad i live in a country that makes it near impossible to do#but probably good so i don't go out and buy a lens that can take pictures in low light dfjgdj#also forgive me satoko if I had been able to take more clear pictures of you i would have posted them ;;
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Just. Had an idea for a beeduo comic. In the Year Of Our Lord 2023?? am I possessed? Is it the fever??? girl this Sickness is Kicking My Ass
#its a comedy one. might actually do it as one Final Hurrah since i never really did anything to say goodbye and thanks#still not watching any of the finales though lmao#btw since i may never actually get around to it#michael beloved asks ranboo if they liked being married. ranboo is like ! yeah obv!!!. and tubbo says the same thing#so michael tries to parent trap them.#only to discover that both of them have individually treasured memories of. the divorces.#ranboo has a scrapbook for each of the four divorces and one of the pictures is them leaving the courthouse with a JUST DIVORCED banner#and tubbo has a stack of shoeboxes with like. selfies of them filling out the paperwork and smiling like newlyweds.#from each and every divorce and marriage#and michael questions them both on it and it becomes increasingly clear that both of them were literally just speed-running amatanormativit#like it was half about getting to get divorced later
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It took me, ugh, MONTHS (2), to get to cleaning the two shrimp tanks I have... I had IRL issues going on that would have made it extremely difficult to do a water change especially while injured, and I just had to keep putting it off. It's just shrimp, so it wasn't like, the worst situation, especially since I have established plants and the tanks are a couple years old. There was just a lot of algae build-up on the glass, and, well... Let me just say it was not contributing to my mental health and well-being while the tanks were in that state.
I tested the water before I started cleaning and the parameters were fine (like, I could have left the tanks even longer if I would be okay with selling my soul to the Algae Collective), and the plants and shrimp look fine, too (I mean, I've obviously been keeping an eye on the tanks bc I sit right next to them). Actually, I'd wager to say that the plants are looking really great (the lilies haven't died off [yet? This is the longest period of time I've seen them stay... foliage... fol... foliated? Idk.] and the cryptocoryne in the 10gal is fucking huge and needs to be rearranged, just not right now). That fucking algae was a motherfucker to get off the 10gal (it's a plastic tank and I think that makes the algae grip harder than the glass 5gal).
[Also, fyi, depending on the tank's needs and stability, recommended water changes are a small one every week or every other week. My parameters don't seem to do anything dramatic, so I usually aim for a 20-30% water change every third week (just depends on how much vacuuming needs to be done and how cooperative the shrimp are with moving aside). So 2 months is still a lot. I still did the normal 30% ish amount, since doing more will risk the shrimp's well-being if there's a sudden change in everything, and my water parameters indicated a change was unnecessary - but I don't test for more than the minimum freshwater tests, so there could be a buildup of some mineral I'm not testing for, which is why the change IS actually necessary regardless of what my test kit says - because these tanks were evaporating a lot in summer, it condenses the minerals added with each water addition, even tho I usually top up with R.O. water.]
My back is fucking killing me lol. It has been killing me since spring when it 'went out' for the first time, and I'm not getting any relief, it sucks. But this had to be done.
The 5gal is looking pretty cloudy still, since the filter was super gunked up and I accidentally spilled gunk back in, so I may need to retest the 5gal parameters tomorrow just to make sure I don't have to do another water change, but it'll probably be fine, right? Shrimp love mulm and detritus. I did give both tanks a big ole algae tab for their trouble, tho. (I need a fuckening dish for the big tank. I really wanna clean off that white quartz rock again, but being white means it's an algae magnet, and it's just gonna go green again after a month or two.)
Anyway, shrimp tax:
I lov thees widdle oange bebies.
Wish I could take better pictures rn, but I am. Like. Dying. My recommendation: never live in an A-frame style room if you have the option. The wall above my tanks is slanted, and NOT fun for my back to bend underneath the wall for maintenance. (My only flat wall in the room is for my TV/PC.) Also, treat your back nicely, in general. I unfortunately have not had the option to treat my back nicely since spring (fall now), because 'when it rains it pours,' and heavy shit that needs to be moved will not move itself. Once I get a few more things in my room in order, I will hopefully be done with the IRL chaos, bc I have Halloween socks to knit, and I'm not putting that off for another year. (I'm still mad that I couldn't make the ones I planned last year. And I found more Halloween yarn I forgot I bought, so I'm gonna try to make multiple socks.) And I just really need to fucking chill and knit and stop having panic attacks and meltdowns.
#me earlier today: oh i should bleach my hair since i havent been able to shower for 2 days it wont damage it as much#me now: i dont know if i can even stand long enough to shower after this#anyway im gonna try to eat something and then shower and pass tf out.#maybe i shouldve taken a before picture to show how much i did...#...but i do Not want to remember 'that one time i didnt do a water change for 2 months' the algae was gross lol i couldnt even get it all#but honestly idc ab the back wall having algae as long as the front and most of the sides are clear#seriously the algae was textured like sandpaper tho. does algae do pearling? if it does then its calcium buildup too#edit while typing bc i looked it up. yes algae pearls. so the bubbles it was making were drying enough to cause calcium deposits#oH also lmao i found the tiniest pinch of hornwort left in the 10gal. idk why the hornwort doesnt like that tank but its hilarious that...#...that one little fingernail sized piece is still alive floating in there. i stuck it next to the lily but the shrimp will prob dislodge it#the hornwort in the 5gal is just freefloating i cant get that shit to stick#the shrimp love that stuff and they look like little birds in a pine tree#im in so much pain im procrastinating food lmao 'order pizza' crossed my mind but my jaw wont let me eat pizza so fml#anyway. just wanted to show an accomplishment even if its not a praise worthy one since i didnt go the extra 10 miles to water change sooner#awwww tho i love seeing them glide around the tank and now i can see them clearly its so chill#shrimp#aquariums#crustaceans#bugs#Cori.exe#Post.exe#Image.exe#also my therapist started cracking up this morning when i said like 'i can finally rest now tht i dont have a Saw trap bathroom to navigate'#seriously tho it was bad and then another issue in the bathroom came up 2 days ago but theyre both fixed now. my br is normal now.#im not normal tho (normal for myself i mean) and unfortunately thats not gonna be an easy fix but im trying#man can i ever make a post where i dont type a million words lmao. inability to focus and then i start typing more stuff#oh ab the hair bleach man my roots are so dark i just trimmed off the last of the bleach from last time so i got 2tone hair rn#idk when ill get to that. dependsnon my back. i already wasnt in a great state of being when i did the aquariums but i needed to clean them#ok i rly need to try n make food and shower before i start growing algae on myself
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coming in with mildy old grievances
upon letting it rest a bit, boston's ending in ofts still doesn't make any sense.
him and nick splitting? fine. him making out with beam knowing that this is not what nick and him agreed to? maybe? idk, the writing makes it seem plausible at least.
but the point being that he is left alone since he was a bad friend?
would only make sense if he wasn't shown to have genuine affection for nick and (uncharacteristically) grovel at his friends feet.
if we are to believe that the ending makes sense because his one (unforgivable) mistake was to not value friendship, why does the show take the time to have him panic about getting found with top by mew in the shower, keep it a secret, admit his affections for nick to himself, be down on himself after his friends shun him and ask "why am i always an asshole to the people i like" and then fully lose all his prior demeanour to try and honestly make up with his friends?
if he's supposed to be a stone-cold bitch who has no affections for anyone else whatsoever, why would he degrade himself like that? especially send photographs to this "friendgroup" months later from new york as if he still needs them and their approval to feel included?
this might bring back the slut-shaming discourse for the umpteenth time, but if the punishment by the narrative was supposed to make sense solely due to him being an asshole of a friend, things don't quite add up.
(and i don't think there is a way that this is not cruel, even when everyone else - sans nick maybe - is acting quite in character, e.g. Mew not only not forgiving him - fair - but being cruel about it by feigning that he's okay with Boston staying in the group...actually, this is going to be too much to put in a bracket, so:
Mew had his revenge (disproportionately when you ask me, but that is neither here nor there) but I do understand that he doesn't want to be friends with Boston anymore. However, he did basically force Boston back into working on the group project. It was only after the Atom thing (where both him and Ray knew that there hadn't been any SA or at least didn't actually care if there was) that Boston was out of the group again. And when Chueam offers to let him back in, Mew suddenly is like "well, you cannot decide that by yourself". Yes, Mew can change his mind on wanting to have Boston around but it doesn't make his behaviour any less cruel. Nor does Chueam not apologising and Ray not caring at all how Boston has become austrasized for the thing he did not do (I cannot overemphasize how Mew did let Boston back into the group - even if it is just for the project - since he called them even to some degree) make them any less shitty friends. And they clearly do not care about hurting him when they smell blood during the new years party that Boston fucked up with Nick.
Is there a difference between being cruel to a friend and being cruel by sleeping with his partner? that's sth everyone can decide for themselves.
but it absolutely gives less and less credence to the justification for his treatment by the show being that he's "just an asshole and a really bad friend".
and to call it a good ending since he meant to cut all ties before moving to new york anyways? only makes sense if it wasn't shown as a change in how he does things that he wants to try and date nick until then. which was a really interesting turn: someone like him wouldn't change to be monogamous but trying to not sleep with people for a few months? could've very well been possible as well as an interesting thing to try as someone like boston. but if we are to believe that he truely doesn't care since he plans on leaving, there would be no reason to try and get his friends forgiveness nor send them a present from new york afterwards.
the others do feel in character, but with the emphasize on the casual slut shaming they do (while it is a conscious theme of the show) and nick even going as far as saying "maybe you are the type of person who should roll alone" (instead of: we just don't fit but that doesn't mean people like you have to be alone) it really doesn't feel like this is about him being an asshole in general at all. queer friendship - despite what the title might infer - hasn't been a central theme of the show. which obviously is up to the writers. but the personal vendetta that seems to have seeped in against someone who was like Boston feels a bit disappointing. if anything, it makes an otherwise interesting show feel very inconsistent and carries the unfortunate side-effect of making the audience feel like this show meant to say some disparranging things about "sluts".
even in the constraints of the story the writers clearly set out to tell, there was a much more interesting and compelling characterization left on the board in favor of moralising in the last minute on not being a slut.
#only friends the series#ofts#beyond tumblr a lot of the audience response was to rejoice at the retribution which is a bit disappointing for one of the more interesting#characters introduced in the series#notwithstanding any translation issues re: to what nick says#but the whole picture makes the messaging pretty clear#and it is curious because i do like that the others not necesseraly are given clear happy endings: chueam believes she fixed the friendgrou#and has never apologized for accusing boston of sa#the choice by force to have top look so out of himself when mew tells sand to kiss him??!! there is still so much in there (further illustr#ted by mix's cameo)#sandray being cute and seemingly on a good path? yes - but i do think not everyone in the audience has forgotten the economic disparaty#between them - sand's self-sacrificing nature and ray's tendency to call him the most cruel names without ever apologizing for it#i felt very empty when boston was left on that curb - but i went wtf when his last mention in the show was him sending them the group photo#maybe i will still write that piece on ethics in this show#other than that and reccing that one tonnick fic i will continue to finally reblog all the amazing ofts gifsets
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Why is O Superman (Laurie Anderson) so incredibly comforting but also I’m sobbing my eyes out at 12am over the line “and when force is gone, there’s always Mom (hi, mom!)”?
#hermit shouts into the void#I guess I’m dropping lore in the tags instead of just adding it to the post#but I had to go no contact with my parents back in October#my wife and I had come out to them as a trans woman and bisexual respectively a year prior#I spent several days arguing over text with my mom#who accused me of lying to her#to my father#to god#to the priest who officiated my wedding#because i didn’t come out before my wedding#to be clear my wife didn’t realize she was trans till almost a year after we were married#she blamed me for my father getting blind drunk and screaming obscenities in the snow in some unfamiliar town when she told him#when I finally saw them both in person a week after initially coming out I was told how I’m delusional#how I’m like the prodigal son who they’re waiting to turn from my evil ways and come home#my mom told me that during the week she wouldn’t speak to me she ‘thought I was cutting her off’ even though she stopped responding to me#she told me that they had considered removing me from their health insurance since they ‘thought I was cutting them off’#but decided not to because ‘they’d never cut me off like that’#I endured a year of being reminded that I was delusional#I heard from friends whose parents were friends with mine how my parents are counting on my marriage failing l#bc I can’t possibly be happy married to a woman (I am)#during 2023 I spent a lot of time unpacking childhood trauma#but that’s a longer story for a different post#I have never sobbed harder than after sending my goodbye message and blocking my parents#having to cut off a family member for your own safety and peace doesn’t erase the love you held for them#I am the same age as my mother was when she had me#I am her eldest living child and was her 5th pregnancy#I look at the picture I have of my parents with me in the hospital and think about a lyric from Stick Season (Noah Kahan) a lot#‘I’ll dream each night of some version of you that I might not have but I did not lose’#and I wish I knew the version of them from that photo#I found out recently that they did end up removing me from their health insurance
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