#and every single actor committed to this episode 100%

[dynamite-derek]

Like a Dragon and how video games can tell stories in a different way than other visual mediums

NOTE: This is best read after playing Like a Dragon Gaiden: The Man Who Erased His Name. I do not mark spoilers, so if you want to experience the end to the game yourself, I suggest you go play.

When you sit down with a television show or movie, you give a commitment of time to it. For a movie, let's say two-and-a-half hours. For a series of 10 movies, that's 25 hours of time. For a television show, this expands a fair deal. The running time for a drama that most of you reading knows about, Breaking Bad, clocks in at around 60 hours. For a series like the Simpsons, that has been going on for basically forever, that running time is 200 hours.

This is where video games set themselves apart. For a long time, I considered a 'long' playtime of a game to clock in at around 60 hours. I'm just talking about single player RPGs here, for an MMO this is basically baby stuff. In my playthrough of Persona 5 Royal, I think I spent around 100 hours with that cast of characters. 100 hours with Joker and Makoto, 60 hours with Walter White.

This time, think about a long running video game franchise. Earlier we established for a series of 10 movies, you'd have around 25 hours of run time. Let's expound on this and think about the James Bond movie franchise. 53 and a half hours for all 25 movies. A pretty solid amount of time to understand one character I would say. That's still shorter than your average long video game. But what about a series of long video games?

The Yakuza franchise has been running since December 8, 2005 and encompasses seven (soon to be eight) mainline titles and several spinoff games. The franchise, up until Yakuza: Like a Dragon, focused primarily on the exploits of Kazuma Kiryu. If you focus primarily on the main story of every game that has been released in the West, you're probably looking at well over 200 hours of gametime. Roughly as many hours as one would put into watching every episode of The Simpsons. If you do every substory and try to experience as much of the story of every game as possible? Your playtime is going to eclipse 500 hours and that is probably being conservative. 200 hours for 34 years of watching Simpsons. 500+ for 18 years of Yakuza where you get to live through the exploits of a fictional character.

That's 500 hours of getting to know Kazuma Kiryu. There are people who have spent more time with this virtual former Yakuza than they have with their own real life friends. As one of those people who has sunk 500+ hours into the franchise, I feel like I have gotten to know Kiryu very well. He is a stoic man. He has a kind side and will help basically anybody who is down on their luck, but he doesn't seem overly sentimental about it. He does show a love and fondness for people he considers 'family' (A young girl/woman as of Y6 named Haruka that's essentially his adopted daughter, her son Haruto and a crew of orphans) but I don't think he is outwardly sappy about it. You just know he cares.

Not only have we sunken a lot of time into playing as Kiryu, but we have also got to experience him in various stages of life. This is one of the big benefits video gaming has in terms of storytelling. In Breaking Bad, if you wanted to show a 17 year old Walter White, you would need to hire an actor to play him. In Yakuza, no matter what, Kiryu is going to look like and be the same Kiryu. Through playing those 500 hours we have seen Kiryu in various stages of life. We have seen him take the fall for a murder he didn't commit, we have seen him basically adopt a young girl, we have seen him fall in and out of love, we have seen him become the patriarch of the Dojima clan only to vacate it, we have seen him 'retire' into life as a taxi driver and we have gotten to see him be a lovable ol' grandpa. There is no 'other' Kiryu actor. Kiryu is Kiryu.

The latest game in the Yakuza/Like a Dragon franchise (Like a Dragon Gaiden: The Man Who Erased His Name) enters us into another phase of his life. He is a man who must pretend he is dead in order to protect his loved ones. He has basically no interactions with familiar faces from those 500+ hours of gametime. There are only small little parts in the story for series mainstays like Haruka Sawamura, Goro Majima, Taiga Saejima and Daigo Dojima. We only know how Kiryu feels about these people because we have played previous games where he is the star.

Taking him away from those he loves makes for a very isolating experience. The game takes place in familiar territory, but everything feels so foreign. We know this is the guy we've spent so much time with because the game explicitly tells us that he is Kiryu, but he spends most of the game's runtime being referred to as Joryu. Kiryu is supposed to be a dead man, so we have this new identity. Most of that time as Joryu is spent around characters the player probably won't be familiar with. You're playing as someone familiar yet someone different.

Yet at the end of the game, we experience something that feels so much deeper because of how much time we've spent with Kiryu. As I've said, we know he is a stoic man with a heart, but he isn't usually put into situations where he can't interact with his loved ones. This game saves the first interactions with his 'family' for the very end. A camera spies the orphans that he cares about visiting his fake grave. A pair of those orphans notice the camera and start talking to it. They never bought that their 'Uncle Kaz' was dead and take this as a sign that he's still kicking. They proceed to tell him about their life.

As the player, you know this is the one area Kiryu cares deeply about. He loves those damn kids. So you are aware that what you are watching has weight. Your mind might flashback to Yakuza 3 where you experience a great deal of playtime hanging around these orphans. You might remember Kiryu putting on a wrestling match to cheer one of these kids up, you might remember Kiryu trying to find out who stole some money from one of the kids, heck you might even remember having to make donations back to the orphanage during Kiryu's time as a taxi driver in Yakuza 5.

But what really sells that weight is Kiryu's reaction. He openly sobs. And not just silently crying as he watches something, he does what I can best describe as 'ugly crying.' As the orphans talk into the camera about their lives since the death of 'Uncle Kaz,' you hear as his breathing gets more and more shallow. You hear everytime he starts to choke up. You hear him sob. You see tears drop onto the screen. Because you spent so much time living as Kiryu and getting to know him through the franchise, this moment feels exceptionally powerful. You've seen Kiryu cry. You've never seen this.

His voice actor gives such an amazing performance here that I sincerely worry about how the English dub patch will convey this. Kiryu has been voiced by the same man (Takaya Kuroda) since the inception. So when you hear Kiryu break down, you hear the same voice you've heard for years doing it. It's like a dear friend finally can't deal with it anymore. Will his new English voice actor YongYea be able to get across these same complex feelings in a different language? Doubtful.

The conversation ends with the orphans saying they were gonna bring everyone back 'tomorrow' so they could talk with Kiryu too. They even promise to bring a present! Unfortunately, since Kiryu is supposed to be dead and since the orphans weren't actually supposed to spot the camera, there is no second video. The camera got removed. However, the gift still comes. You don't get to physically have it because how can a dead man take something? You get a picture of it instead. It's a drawing made by what is the equivalent to Kiryu's grandchild. Haruka's son. It even has Kiryu in it.

When the player sees this, their mind might flash back to Yakuza 6. The feeling of shock when you discover Haruka now has a child and all the missions spent walking around and comforting this kid. You don't know much about this kid's personality now, but you were there from the beginning. You spent probably 50 hours with that little kid. You had to move the controller up and down to comfort him when he cried. He's Kiryu's 'grandson' but you are aware of him too. You spent time with him.

And Kiryu's tears and reactions to this young boy are every bit as gut wrenching as you might expect. You want nothing more for him to go back to his old life in Kamurocho. You want him and Majima to have one more fight. You want Daigo to show up and be like "Look dude, I need ONE more thing from you." But that time has passed. That Kiryu is gone. And in that moment you feel it. Life has continued without him there and the kids are doing well and he did all he could for them while he was 'alive.' He accomplished something great and as a person who played 500+ hours, you feel a piece of that too.

The feelings you get here are feelings that are exclusive to video games. You simply watch Walter White build his meth empire. You simply watch James Bond race around really shitty CGI icebergs. You got to experience these moments Kiryu went through because for 500+ hours you were there too. You were playing pocket circuit like an idiot, you were training up that number one hostess. You put in the time and you got rewarded for it.

In short, Like a Dragon Gaiden: The Man Who Erased his Name is everything that is right about storytelling in video games. It is an experience that can mean something if you merely watch it on youtube, but if you truly put in those 500+ hours it feels a lot more impactful. I can't wait to see where we go from here.

[theendwhereibegin]

I should give you some warnings for this chapter as it may trigger you. There are mentions of abuse, in all its forms.

Pedro is a great guy once again. You know the drill.

Universally meant.Earthly bound

story line

inner monologue

Part 3

Today has been one hell of a day. I felt like ages had passed, not just 10 hours of my life. I felt so exhausted, but still, in the back of my mind, Pedro`s smile played like a broken record.

He was sweet enough not to make me feel embarrassed of the “Starbucks episode” , how he called it and made me feel at ease during the photo shoot. He somehow felt that my anxiety was starting to get the best of me, so he filled the time with jokes and heartfelt laughs. It did make us work 2 hours extra, but God, was it worth it.

I haven`t been living under a rock. I knew who Pedro was, and even though he portrayed my favourite character ever, Javier Pena, in Narcos, I somehow managed to keep my fangirling inside. That was some miracle because whenever my eyes locked with his, I felt like my knees were about to give up. Partly because of him being there and, also, because my first time meeting one of my favourite actors and I looked like I have just rolled out of a tent a Coachella. Wait, how did I manage to get myself on the floor?

Daydreaming about him, my back just slid on the entrance door once it was closed. I couldn`t believe that I had the chance to meet him and get to be his photographer for the day.

Sure, I have met other celebrities in my 10 years at the studio, but 9 of them I was in a committed relationship and I wasn`t even interested in looking at another man, or so I thought. That meant that while I was in love with the man that I called my boyfriend, he was in love with what I could potentially become if I would let him mould me the way he wanted it.

It`s a part of my life that I would like buried and done with, as even remembering it made my entire body ache.

He`s played so many mind games with me during our 9 years together, and me being younger than him, I believed everything that came out of his mouth.

I don`t even know if you want to know the story, but at the end of the day, it's what shaped me into who I am today. I was young and stupid when I met him. He was 11 years older than me, so in my head, I thought he would bring the emotional stability that I needed. I was love bombed in the first year, and that`s what kept me captive in that relationship. He made me rely on him, emotionally, financially. I loved him truly because, in my mind, he was the best that I could ever do. He made sure I understood that and believed it 100%. Then came the emotional abuse. It wasn`t all at once at first, it was in small doses, until, later on in our relationship, it was all that he was doing, and the only moments he would act like an actual boyfriend would be while out with other people. I loved that version of him and started to hate the version he was at home. At one moment, his emotional abuse turned into physical. One single slap in front of all of our friends, and somehow I was the one that ended up begging him to reconsider and not leave me. To this day, I do not understand how he did that. Later, came the sexual abuse.

As I remembered every small detail, my heart ached. If I could only turn back time and tell the young adult version of me that everything would work out and that it`s okay if she wants to leave him.

I would be exhausted from work. I would come back to a messy home and no food, so I had to do that as well. By the end of it, I was done and over. All I wanted to do was sleep, but he didn`t care. I would say no so many times, scream it even. He would take it as a yes, and that my screams were of pleasure, not pain. It went over and over again. I had to end the relationship and read a lot of books to realise that I was sexually abused. Yes, you read that right. Sexual abuse can happen even if in a relationship. Consent is still necessary.

I didn't deserve it. No one does, but somehow, I couldn't get myself out of that situation until Covid appeared, and I finally built up the strength to kick him out and file in for a divorce. I was finally breathing again after so many years of holding my breath without even knowing.

I suddenly remembered my state and collected myself off the floor, and dragged myself to take a shower and search for some food in my fridge.

My cut didn`t look as bad, but it still needed to be thoroughly cleaned. As I winced at the pain that shot through my head while cleaning the cut, I felt like my entire mess of a life was meant to bring me in this moment. I worked very hard to get here, but it always felt like a higher force pushed me to never give up

My thoughts were suddenly cut short by my phone ringing next to me. I started jamming to the ringtone as it was my favourite song, 'Everywhere' by Fleetwood Mac. Words of advice? Never put your favourite song as your phones ringtone, or you'll never answer calls anymore.

"Hi Alexis! " I said while trying to sound cheery and not in pain.

"Please tell me you can get ready in 20. After the day you've had, you and me, pub, shots, good music"

All I wanted to do was to crawl in my bed and sleep, but the shots didn't sound bad at all after today. I shouldn't, should I?

"Look A, I feel like I could drop dead at any point. Can't we do that tomorrow or something? I am also old, and my bones hurt."

"I swear I will come and drag you out myself! Get yourself ready. We'll be 1 hour tops. It's just for us to unwind after today. Please?" Said Alexis in a pleading voice, which made me picture her puppy stare. It made me give up.

"Fine. See you in 20!"

I tried finding something to wear and had a quick snack while trying my best to tame my hair, which was now sticking in every direction.

I was done in 15, which was a new record, even for me, but Alexis was always before the stated time anyway.

A soft knock confirmed my theory.

"Girl, we are gonna have so much fun!" She didn't even finish her sentence, and she was already hugging me.

"If you say so! Let's go before I change my mind and into my pj's."

We arrived at the only Irish bar we had in the area. What can I say? I love a good Guinness.

The bar was absolutely packed and whilst making our way to the bar, in true Olivia fashion, a drunk girl turns around with her wine glass and spills it all on me.

I felt defeated at this point. What were the chances my clothes would be stained twice in one day?

"I swear Olivia! If there should be a new definition for attracting bad things, your name should definitely be mentioned." Alexis was a bit amused, and why lie? I was a bit amused as well by my own misery.

"I am a magnet. Let's grab some drinks and have no care in the world. Who cares? I am wearing red wine as an accessory today? Though I won't lie, coffee is a warmer accessory." I said while shrugging my head and laughing.

The night went on without further incidents, just me singing along to Dropkick Murphys a bit too loud. I needed this outing more than I knew.

I decided to walk back home while Alexis took a taxi to hers. It didn't make sense for her to make an extra trip for me. I lived 3 blocks away anyway.

With the headphones on I was vibing once again with a great tune. Didn't realise that I started dancing and twirling around the street while singing the lyrics softly to myself.

My last twirl wasn't really the greatest one in history, and I understood that while I felt my fall break when two arms enveloped me and kept me from hitting the ground.

"We've got to stop meeting like this, or I will believe you are doing it on purpose, Olivia," came a deep, slightly amused voice. I didn't get to see who it was because my eyes were shut in a desperate attempt to not let out a loud yelp.

While slowly opening my eyes, the figure started to come into focus. Pedro. If the ground could swallow me up right about now, that would be great.

"I...I am sorry." I said while straightening my clothes. I felt bold all of a sudden. The tequilla right helps as well.

" I could say the same. You seem to always be there whenever I fall. Are you stalking me, Pedro?"

It was a very sad and drunk attempt at a flirt. I am not proud of it.

" I am not!" He said panicked.

"I live about 2 blocks that way, and I wanted to go and grab my food and go back home and watch something boring enough to help me sleep."

He looked so good in that ligh. Hell, he looked good in any light. His messy hair, his eyes, the was his lips were pursed together.

I must have been staring because my trance was finished once he cleared his throat.

" I would say take a photo. It will last longer, but you already did today. Quite a few as well." By the time he finished, I was blushing more than a teenager.

" I am going to the pizza place down the road. If you want, you can join me. At least I won't be taking my pizza and eating it like a loner." Pedro said while hoping that he didn't cross any line with you.

"To be honest, I am so hungry. Alexis took me out of work, and I literally had a small snack before going out. So, sure."

We strolled towards the pizza place while talking about various topics. Once we reached the destination, he stepped in front of me and opened the door.

I was shocked. No one has ever done that small gesture for me.

As we took our seats at the table, he insisted on holding the chair out for me. It was like I have lived in the wilderness before I met him.

"Ready to order?" Asked our waiter.

We ordered our food and drinks and fell into a very comfortable conversation. We started getting deeper into the subject that is our lives. Our upbringing and our weird phases, parents, and so on.

Me, the antisocial, was talking like I have known him my entire life. I was so comfortable with sharing my past with this man. Not all of it, but parts that I wasn't ashamed of. Being married and divorcing after I was abused by a man didn't seem like the kind of topic to bring up, so I didn't, mostly because I was scared he'll think less of me. Not that I was much to even cross his mind.

He was talking about his heritage, about Chile, and his eyes were positively sparkling with joy. They exploded with joy once I told him about my trip to Santiago, Chile, and how the whole culture made me fall in love with the city.

"You've been to Chile? That's amazing!"

"I was 19. I wanted to take a once in a lifetime trip before life really started. I picked Chile, mainly because I was always drawn to its culture. It didn't disappoint one bit. I still have my good friend, Alejandra there. I've been telling her for ages that I will visit again, but life got in the way." I said while remembering my times there. Dancing with the locals. Letting myself get engulfed by its dishes and all-around culture.

" Your smile is just as big as mine whenever I mention Chile. I am glad you like my home country and city. But what do you mean life got in the way? You still took days off, didn't you? Nothing is more important than living your life to the fullest." He said while taking a sip out of his beer.

Suddenly, flashbacks started happening, and before I knew it, I excused myself and went to the bathroom trying to compose myself. My anxiety was taking over, and soon enough, I began sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't catch my breath. No matter how much I tried, I couldn't run away from the memories of him. I couldn't run away from his screams and drunken benders. I could still feel his fingers lingering on my body, making me feel worthless.

" Liv? Are you okay? It's been a while. You have me worried." He said while softly knocking on the door.

"I'll be out in a minute," I said between sniffles, taking deep breaths while trying to control myself. I fixed myself in the mirror and emerged through the door to a Pedro with his back leaning on the wall just in front of the door. He had a worried look on his face, and I could see he was replaying our conversation in his head, trying to make sense.

I made my way to the table with him following me. We sat down, and we ate in silence. I never thought silence could hurt more.

We paid for the bill and made our way out. Walking in the same direction, I felt the need to break the silence.

" I usually never get like this. It's just... whenever you asked how life got in the way, I got pulled back in the past. It's not something that I want to go through again. That's all. I am sorry for ruining your night. I didn't mean to." I said while picking at my hand, trying my best not to break down again.

He didn't say anything but put his arm around me and pulled me in a hug.

" Whatever it is that broke you this badly. I am sorry that you went through it. I can't imagine putting anyone I love through that. He didn't deserve you." And kissed the top of my head.

I was stunned. I didn't know what to say or how to react. How did he even know? How did he even piece it together that easily? He must have known because my relationship with my family is rock solid, and I only have a very carefully picked group of friends.

" I would rather not talk about it. At least, not now. It was a dark part of my life, a part I am trying my best to leave behind me. I appreciate your words, and I definitely appreciated the way you were with me tonight. I've never experienced it. Whoever will get to be with you, she will be one lucky lady."

" You really talk a lot when you get anxious, don't you?" He looked amused at me. " But, thank you. I have yet to find someone to call mine. I might never. I am not getting any younger. You still have a real chance of finding someone who treats you the way you deserve it. To open doors for you, or hold your chair out. To catch you whenever you fall. You deserve that Liv" he said while taking my hands in his.

At this point, I thought I was in some parallel universe. There was no way this was actually happening to me. Me? Never! But yet here I am. In front of this amazing guy that half the planet would love to be with. Being told that I deserve happiness. That I deserve to be loved.

I was suddenly being held close to his chest with his hand rubbing my back. The hand went higher and higher until it reached my right cheek. While stroking it, my head kept getting gently tilted upwards, and soon, I was looking into his eyes. Even his eyes were softly smiling.

"I would say we both waited too long to connect with someone in the way we did today. I have never felt so comfortable near anyone. I have never felt the need to make someone smile more than I wanted to make you smile today. I guess, sometimes waiting for what feels like a lifetime is worth it. May I?" His monologue left me breathless and speechless. His eyes were now darting from my lips to my eyes. It was his way of subtly asking for permission to kiss me.

Still stunned, I moved my face closer to his, our noses touching. My way of telling him that I have never wanted to kiss someone else as much as I wanted to kiss him.

He leaned in all the way, and I was met with the softest and purest kiss I have ever experienced. It was filled with the emotions of the words he just said to me. It was filled with years of waiting and hoping we'll find our happy ending.

He held me so tight and yet not firm enough that I couldn't move. The front of our shoes were touching as well as to say 'It took you long enough to find me'.

My life was falling into place right then and there.

I could feel he felt the same as he parted from me, not before kissing the tip of my nose.

" Let's get you home safely. You've had a full day. We'll pick up where we left it tomorrow, hopefully on an official date?" He asked while following my movements, trying to get home.

Pedro held my hand the whole way through and always made sure he would face me when talking. He stole another kiss in front of my door and let it linger as we both didn't want to part ways.

" See you tomorrow at 7 pm? I'll pick you up and wear whatever you want. You'll look good anyway. Don't stress about it too much. It's just gonna be us two somewhere in town on a date. Deal?" He said while holding my waist and looking at me with reassurance.

" Deal. Can't really vouch for the no stress bit, but I will try." I was feeling like I was floating.

We kissed again and off he went.

While closing my door, I woke up sliding against it once again, but this time, I was smiling so much, and my face hurt. I couldn't believe what a turn tonight took.

One thing I wasn't aware of. Today was meant to happen just like that. With me going through everything and him being there for me.

[fiadorable]

81 Great Things in The Elysian Kingdom

Strange New Worlds season one, episode eight... sounds like a hell of a story 👑

Strange New Worlds | Children of the Comet | Ghosts of Illyria Part 1 & Part 2 | Memento Mori | Spock Amok | Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach | Serene Squall | The Elysian Kingdom | All Those Who Wander | A Quality of Mercy

Rukiya is adorable. Did you see that please face?

Rukiya asking to have a certain part read and then pronouncing that she hates that part is peak small child

Rukiya: budding fanfic author trying to change the ending

"When I'm better can I see your quarters?" "I'll take you to see the whole ship!"

Watching M'Benga try to find a cure for Rukiya's illness is absolutely heartbreaking as a parent - especially when his concoction blows up in his face because he's so tired he's not thinking straight

Automatic forcefield around toxic chemical

Number One is compassionate and supportive of M'Benga while still doing her job, which includes making sure he gets the rest he needs to do his job. This is what good management looks like.

M'Benga calls her Una! They are besties now!

This episode starts out very low-key (which helps with how zany it becomes later) and it's nice to see how things operate when the Enterprise isn't in crisis

"Why Mr. Spock, I never took you for the superstitious type."

Pike and Ortegas Bridge Banter I

"Mitchell, what's going on with my ship?"

Sassy!Spock accusing Pike of jinxing their good fortune

Bridge Troubleshooting!

M'Benga is dead on his feet when he gets into the turbolift to go treat Ortegas on the bridge - no wonder he thinks he's hallucinating

The set design on the bridge for the Elysian Kingdom is phenomenal

King Ridley's costume is amazing

Pike's hair jfc 🤣

"What the hell"

The bickering between Adya and Rauth is superb, Navia and Mount do a great job

Ortegas the is (one of) the prankster(s) on the ship - which lines up with what we saw in the Children of the Comet

Rauth and Adya Bickering I

"Computer?" "He obviously means The Oracle"

Rauth and Adya Bickering II and III

Fireflies in the corridor! 😍 The greenery is such a cool change from the stark white

Chapel the mystic 😂

PRINCESS THALIA oh my god that dress

M'Benga doing his best to not bust out laughing at seeing serious, straight-laced La'An sweep into sickbay with a tiny dog in the most ridiculous dress

"What are her dopamine levels?"

Oh my god Hemmer being dragged down the hallway by Mitchell and her guards 😂

Mitchell's scar on her face is badass

Christina Chong did not have to go this hard with Princess Thalia, but she did, and it's amazing

Flying through space screen saver on the ready room screen behind Pike and Ortegas

Rauth and Adya Bickering IV

"Starfall is thirsty." 😂

M'Benga somehow does not lose it when La'An gives them a preview of her epic song of mourning

La'An is a lying liar who lies about her singing ability (see: Children of the Comet)

M'Benga just being like "Great" after La'An finishes her song 😂

Spock as Pollux is a treat… he's still very even keeled like Spock, but he shows very tempered, quiet emotions that have a spooky, creepy edge

Uhura's Queen Neve naaaaails! Oh. My. God. She is so fabulous. Her dress. Her makeup. Her headpiece. Those shoulder embellishments 😍

Rauth stamping his foot like a five year old

Irony of the dungeon being the transporter pad

Dungeon Troubleshooting!

"It felt like my brain was being squeezed out my nose" "I did that to a man once"

Science IS magic

Hemmer is that guy who shows up to play D&D begrudgingly because someone else made him, but when he gets there he has ten pages of backstory for his character, a special voice, and never once during the session does he break character

"I am a wizard"

"Not bad… wizard. I think this… science." And Hemmer just smiling at her because when you boil this episode down, it's just two dudes trying to solve a problem while their coworkers and friends have a spontaneous LARP day at the office

Gooding does unhinged Queen Neve so well - she is fantastic in the scene after the jailbreak where she threatens Mitchell

"I have armed myself" 😂

Z'ymira and Adya 😍 "A raven would be too much trouble?"

Engineering Troubleshooting! Although none of it is terribly helpful until M'Benga realizes he's not in the Elysian Kingdom, he's in Rukiya's Kingdom

Hemmer trying to mediate Adya and Z'ymira's lover's spat 🤣

Hemmer is 5000% done with this episode

Hemmer is also 5000% with M'Benga when he learns who Rukiya is and why she's on the ship

The shot of Rauth kneeling to Neve with her symbol haloing her is great - one of my favorite shots in the episode

There is so much happening in sickbay - Z'ymira and Adya parting, Chapel cooking up something in a gigantic cauldron, Hemmer putzing around, and M'Benga trying to find Rukiya (there's got to be a deleted scene from this)

Hemmer comforting M'Benga for not seeing Rauth's betrayal coming

Adya stomping her foot at Rauth

"YOU SHALL NOT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER OR I SHALL BRING THE MIGHT OF MY KINGDOM DOWN UPON YOUR HEADS"

Hemmer sending Queen Neve's forces to the Event Horizon 😂

"ABRA-CADABRA!" good god this crew is so extra i love it

Hemmer has the transporters on speed dial

Rukiya in her princess dress 😭😭😭😭😭😭 she's so beautiful and so happy

"I've been watching you, Daddy. You did such a good job!" 😭

Hemmer offering to be a conduit with the entity even though there's a good chance it would accidentally kill him (I think he's tied with Sam Kirk on almost deaths this season)

Hemmer's antennae move!

"She was lonely. Like me." 😭😭😭 the rest of this will just be me bawling ignore me

M'Benga has to make the same choice as King Ridley - full circle narrative

And this choice is… really, really heavy and this episode does not get enough time and space to really expound upon it or the consequences of the action he takes… and not to get too personal but as a parent myself if I had to choose between my child dying a presumably horrific death (he describes it as "withering away" in Ghosts of Illyira although we don't actually get to see it because Star Trek is afraid of sick people 🙄) or never seeing her again, never able to hold her in my arms, never able to see her grow up, but knowing she is alive… I mean… I'm not having to make that choice and so I can't say with certainty, but I don't think I would have made a different decision than M'Benga here.

Rukiya and M'Benga hugging before her transformation 😭😭😭😭

Debra is beautiful!

"It tickles, Daddy!" 😭

M'Benga dealing with the sudden, expected yet un-expected loss of his daughter, reaching for where she stood

Grown up Rukiya 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

What's Rukiya's AO3 pseud?

Rukiya's farewell to her father is beautiful. With the exception of him fly-fishing on Starbase 1 back during Spok Amok, we only ever see M'Benga working or looking for a cure for Rukiya. His entire life has been consumed by trying to save his daughter, to his own detriment. Now, Rukiya is at peace. She is safe. She is happy. And M'Benga can begin to live for himself.

Hemmer waking up with a migraine level hangover in M'Benga's quarters with absolutely no idea how he got there 😂

M'Benga's first name is Joseph!

Una coming to check on her friend to make sure his secret daughter came through the missing five hours okay

This last moment of Number One and M'Benga connecting is great. These two characters have/had incredibly heavy secrets they were/are carrying around with them, and being able to confide in each other and form a friendship outside their working relationship is such beautiful character growth for them both

[maxwell-grant]

Vincenzo: The Gentleman Villain Reborn

Long before there were loudmouth buff guys in spandex, there was the gentleman villain.

There once was a time when the gentleman villain, whether a gentleman thief in the Raffles or Lupin mold, or murderous arch-criminals like Fu Manchu and Fantomas, organizations like Les Vampires, and even in-between figures like Rocambole and Judex, was the coolest thing in the pop culture block. The figures right around the corner of Baker Street, when Nick Carter and Sexton Blake and any billion old serial detectives weren’t quite cutting it. Their time was not to last long in the spotlight, as the pulp heroes consolidated domain in the 30s and then the superheroes took over, but every now and then, they return in various forms, never fully gone. But I’d dare say I’d never seen a gentleman villain story quite so bold, so modern, so dynamic and so gloriously over-the-top in pride over it’s existence, until I began watching Vincenzo.

Vincenzo is BADASS and I don’t use the term lightly. Not just the titular character, but the show itself. It’s currently a couple episodes short of the finale and you should stop everything you’re doing or watching and go watch Vincenzo. It’s been an utterly glorious ride from beginning to end with no shortage of great characters, terrific writing, great relationships and jaw-dropping moments as every episode succeeds in topping each other in WOW HOLY SHIT factor. It’s a shot of adrenaline and storytelling excellence to the eyeballs and you don’t have anything better to be doing right now than watching this.

I mentioned a while ago that Black was a show that, besides being also terrific in quality, captured my interest as a Shadow fan specifically because I saw in Black what I believe is the heart of The Shadow as a character: an embodiment of evil, motivated and created and warped by social catastrophe and strife, set loose to punish true evil in order to protect humanity. In that regard, if Black is where I find the heart of The Shadow, Vincenzo is where I find the spirit of what I like about The Shadow as a series: Cathartic urban fairytales where an extraordinary agent of change, armed with incredible cunning, sleight-of-hand and combat skills, rises above a dark background to command a folk brigade of ordinary people who reveal themselves to be extraordinary through their newfound purpose, to right the wrongs of society’s predators, by being better at their tactics than they are and turning their tools against them. 

I’m gonna spoil it a bit under the cut but please go watch it. I cannot praise this show enough and I’ll do my best to try.

Vincenzo centers around the titular character, Vincenzo Cassano, an Italian lawyer who works for the mafia as a consigliere, adopted by it’s Don at the age of eight. After the death of the Don and an attempted betrayal by his son, Vincenzo flees to Seoul and ends up taking residence at a ramshackle building called Geumga Plaza. Geumga Plaza is the hiding place of a gigantic stash of gold hidden by one of Vincenzo’s former clients, and he intends to retrieve it to rebuild his life somewhere else. Naturally, not only is the hidden room completely impenetrable, but the building is occupied. by residents who are being forced out of it by criminals working for the Babel corporation, which intends to take possession of the building. And thus, Vincenzo has to put his skills into working out progressively bigger problems, as his efforts to uncover the gold turn into a fight against Babel and it’s lawyers, as the problems take on bigger and bigger proportions. 

Vincenzo’s got a lot of what you’d expect from a k-drama at first glance. The leading man is a dashing young man, the leading lady is headstrong and stubborn, you see their romance coming a mile away and they take their damn time getting there, there’s emotional backstories that take a long time to be revealed, lots of wacky side characters and comedy interspersed with the darkest moments, a focus on corporate corruption, and so on. But it’s got an intrusion of elements brought by Vincenzo’s inclusion, such as mob drama, tonal and cultural imbalance, and the gentleman villain tropes that Vincenzo brings, as the catalyst of change whose antics backflip through action hero, romantic hero, super hero and super villain, cunning puppetmaster and gun-toting warrior alike, and start to have an effect on the world around him. His allies become stronger, more determined and effective, and the villains grow smarter and more horrid as they desperately try to avoid their own downfalls.

On paper, Vincenzo is almost a textbook example of how to craft a villain protagonist. He’s a mysterious foreigner with a hidden past and incredible skills who shows up uninvited in “our” world, who starts terrorizing and manipulating people into doing his bidding. He’s got a hotheaded and foolish investigator chasing after his every move, and frequently employs misdirection and sleight-of-hand to fool the authorities. He commits crimes and employs underhanded methods in the service of stamping out people worse than himself. He never really makes any claim of being a hero and actively rejects the notion he’s fighting for justice, but instead states he’s doing it as a matter of principle. One of the characters early on even states he gives off the vibe of a movie villain, even Vincenzo himself tells Hong Cha-Young, the female lead, that he’s teaching her how to be a proper villain. In another series, Vincenzo would be the hypercompetent sidekick to the main villain, or secretly the main villain, the lone badass that the action hero would have a tough fight against before defeating and moving on. But Vincenzo does not allow himself to be dismissed so easily. 

On the first episode, when we’re introduced to him in Italy, he’s painted as the badass to end all badasses. But the minute he arrives in Seoul, he falls for a trick at the airport and is mugged by two cabbies, and has to walk around penniless and without dignity, shouting curses in Italian that nobody understands. He has to sleep in a broken down apartment, his “taking a steamy shower with classical music playing” fanservice scene keeps being interrupted because the shower doesn’t work, and a pigeon chattering outside his window keeps ruining his sleep. 

The tenants of the building are all introduced as varying levels of unsympathetic and useless, or downright creepy. The tailor screws up his favorite suit, the chef who claims to have studied in Italy is a total fraud, there’s tenants who scare us by passing as ghosts and zombies, and Hong Cha-Young is introduced as an unlikable stooge for Babel. Vincenzo is a villain protagonist who is forced out of his grand mafia epic film, where he conducts business around lavish manors while classical music plays, and stumbles onto a korean drama, a world that operates by different rules and where no one has any reason to take him seriously at first, and gradually finds out that the difference between both worlds is not as big as he’d imagined.

It’s only at the very end of the first episode, when the neighborhood gangsters show up to terrorize the tenants, that Vincenzo starts to kick ass again, and he has not stopped so far. In fact, not just him, ALL of the tenants have gradually started kicking ass with him. Hong Cha-Young severs all connections to Babel and proves to be, as his main partner in crime, just as cunning, twice as driven, and three times as batshit and kooky. The tailor who ruined his suit turns out to be an ex-gang member capable of fending off groups of thugs with only his scissors. The creepy piano girl reveals herself a hacking genius, the zombie impersonators become incredible actors, the failed wrestler and badass wannabe becomes his most active field agent along with his equally strong wife, the chef improves his cooking and lends his restaurant as a meeting center, all of the characters, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM gradually become incredible, competent, resourceful people, really no different than they were before, it just took a little courage and pushing. 

The headstrong and foolish agent pursuing Vincenzo becomes 100% smitten with him and quickly becomes one of his greatest allies. Even the neighborhood gangsters, after being left to die by Babel and forced to start anew, quickly become some of his most loyal allies, and gradually redeem themselves in the eyes of the tenants to the point they become friends. In departing from his old family, Vincenzo forms a new one, even if never by his intention. They even all get matching suits.

This incredibly potent, human core surrounding the antics of an extraordinary figure of action is part of what used to make the Agents of The Shadow such a special, meaningful and beloved part of the series, and something every adaptation since then has been 100% poorer for neglecting. But Vincenzo does it, and does it right. I could watch a billion adventures with these people and never get sick of them. 

Vincenzo is a slick, modern take on the gentleman villain that takes many of it’s oldest conventions and provides blueprints for making them work in modern times. His plans often take a performance art-edge as he employs tactics both old-fashioned and modern, like using social media to stage an event in front of the Plaza so the bulldozers set to demolish it won’t be able to pass, or copying files and passing them to his police contact while keeping the real ones when said police contact inevitably betrays him. The tenants put all of their skills to use, no matter how unusual or seemingly useless. Every episode lays the groundwork for a smashing finale where all of the threads come together and we bare witness to a grand tapestry of karmic retribution.

The villains themselves are no slouch, and also have that modern edge that gradually ramps up. They stage discreet assassinations involving gas leaks and watches meant to burst into flames. They stack the deck impossibly against all characters. They employ masked goons by the dozens, armies of lawyers to smudge any connections between themselves and their actions, and every sector of society in covering them, from journalists publishing pro-Babel propaganda to police commissioners. The assistant of the main villain does zumba classes amidst ordering assassinations, and is often likened to a snake and a witch with her "Crystal Ball” (the name she uses for ordering assassin contacts by the phone), complete with a cowardly, scheming assistant she bullies at every turn. The CEO of Babel has a dual nature not out of place in a Jekyll & Hyde/Dorian Grey kind of story. 

The main villain is often painted as a slasher villain backed by massive corporate power, murdering people with hockey equipments and even outright named “Jason” at one point, with a tense string theme song accompanying his deeds. The show hides the villain at plain sight by using one of the most familiar set-ups of romantic dramas and the tension never stops even after he’s revealed. 

Mobster films tend to paint an idealized version of it’s protagonists, not necessarily because of a genuine love or interest with mobsters (I mean, it really goes without saying that real life mobsters are obviously not admirable figures), but out of a sense of displaying a “this is what it could be” fantasy, a fantasy where the mafioso is a dark hero who will still ultimately do the right thing and stick up for the little guy, in a similar way to how superheroes often function as police officers except, y’know, actually dedicated to protecting people. 

Vincenzo does go to great lengths to address the imbalance of putting such a dark figure as it’s hero, through showing how the situation can only be addressed by the intrusion of a figure such as Vincenzo. There’s a scene where Vincenzo and Hong proceed to explain extremely succintly to their cop ally why the “bad apples” argument is horseshit.  One of the show’s characters, someone who’s spent his entire life being the best person he could, and dedicating himself 110% percent to fighting evil even at the expense of connecting with his own family, someone who absolutely should be the hero to take down Babel, admits shortly before dying that it wasn’t enough, that it was never going to be enough, and that what the situation calls for isn’t a hero, but a monster. That monster being Vincenzo, who is not only powerful and monstrous, but commands the loyalty of people high and low class alike, criminals and law enforcement agents, to fight Babel. In his words, “the ultimate monster”, something even the world’s biggest badass cannot defeat by himself. 

On most other set-ups, Vincenzo would be pretty unmistakably the villain. But here, when he’s set up against a starkly realistic depiction of how corporations actually function in our world, depicts that Vincenzo’s ability to clear his way through goons John Wick-style is nowhere near enough, and to that end, he’s gonna have to fight impossible battles using his brains and his allies. And in the end, he defeats them, time and time again, and proves that they were not that impossible after all. 

One can only hope he’s on to something.

Oh yeah and THE PIGEON BY HIS WINDOW ALSO KICKS ASS and I will not explain how, just watch the show, I can’t do it justice no matter how much I talk about it.

[sserpente]

Hey!! Happy Loki Eve!! It makes me sad that this will be the last time we will see Tom in a while and this is the last time I’ll be able to message you each week to hear your thoughts about the week’s episode. I enjoyed hearing your thoughts and sharing your Norse mythology knowledge. Do you have any lasting remarks before watching episode 6 of Loki?

Aww, that's so sweet! I'm so glad you're enjoying my thoughts and my little Norse Myths lessons, haha! I don't want it to end either, it could just go on forever! I will miss those Wednesdays so much, it's actually sad!

But I'm also so excited for the finale! I have absolutely no clue how the series could end! I posted my theories but at this point, anything is possible I guess! All I know is that I am 100% certain they're already working on Season 2 and I just... the amount of passion that Tom has put into this series (I mean pretty much all the cast members were head over heels for him) is so touching and you can feel his commitment in every single episode. This series has given me so much, I am so grateful I can call a man like Tom my favourite actor!

[neeterloveschenford]

RNM 3x07

Hello my fellow lovers of all things alien! Another episode down and six more to go. First I’d like to start by congratulating Heather Hemmens! What an accomplishment! I hope you can continue to pursue your passion for directing. Also I would like to once again put forth my deepest desire for someone to rescue Lucky out into the universe. He’s a good boi! He deserves better!! And on that note, let’s dive into this episode.

I know I can get flip floppy when it comes to Maria, but just a few days ago she was jumping off rooftops and shooting up adrenaline to try jump start her powers. Now she’s strong enough to put Jones in a cage? Maybe if there had been a time jump, but we’re still on day 7. I don’t buy it. I don’t think they know what to do with her even after 3 seasons. I’m not expecting any kind of comeuppance for last season. I think they are completely correct in sweeping that all under the rug. It’s not the show for something like that. If this were Dawson’s Creek or One Tree Hill, sure. But I want to see sci-fi and aliens more than friendship and relationship drama. So I’m not sure where they think they are going to end up with her, but so far it’s been hit or miss for me.

Next we have Liz being all sciencey. I love seeing her, Michael and Isobel working together. But I gotta say, her plan was kinda rubbish. I mean, Jones has been one step ahead of everyone and Liz is gonna Mata Hari him? Don’t think so

Dear Deputy Pete, why are all men so dumb. Every moron on this show hates Max but wants to get into Isobel’s pants. I get it, but it’s so cliche.

Hello Father Dallas! Betcha Rosa’s not gonna miss mass this week! I like him. He quoted Biggie. I already like his relationship with Rosa ten times more than her relationship with Wyatt. I liked his advice too. He works on the Res. Does he know Greg? I wanna know. And he was in a bts picture with Vlamis and Trevino a few days ago. Guess we’ll be seeing more of him.

Alex keeps talking about Afghanistan this season. The last two seasons he only talked about Iraq. I know he served both places, but shouldn’t his line have been something along the lines of he survived the deserts of Afghanistan and Iraq instead of just one of them? Maybe I’m just being nitpicky.

Why is Kyle just being kept in a barn? Is there someone with medical knowledge there taking care of him? Did Eduardo just take him there and hook him up to that equipment and leave him there? What the heck is going on? That barn can’t be that sanitary. And where was Maria in that flashback? Did he just leave her there? Did her shooting Kyle up with adrenaline make things worse for Kyle? Does Eduardo have medical training? Does Kyle know he has an uncle? Who were the guys that were breaking into Max’s house. So many questions. So few answers.

Poor Lucky! Can we find him a new home please?!? HE’S A GOOD BOI!!

I like Isobel having female friends. She has grown so much since last season. But this plan is sooooo bad! Seriously. How did they think this would work? I know they were getting desperate, but seriously!

I’m gonna need Michael and Rosa to have a scene together every episode from here on out! I love their dynamic. And Michael is such a great teacher. Patient when she needed it. Challenging her when she needed it. And the sass coming from Rosa! Also, how stinking cute is it that Michael played baseball! I can just imagine my sweet little Guerin making a home run and being all smug about it. And I’d just like to point out that Heads Up 7Up was my favorite game when I was a kid. I would be devastated every single time we played at school and my thumb didn’t get put down. Memories.

Seriously Liz. How could you not realize Jones was onto you. When has Max ever referred to Maria as DeLuca? She has always been Maria to him. Wait. Hold up. Michael was the only one who ever refers to her as DeLuca. Was this a clue to the big reveal later on? We may never know.

I really love Greg, but he’s really kind of bland these days. I really hope when Maria gets out of that coma that he starts to challenge her. She needs Greg the former drag racer. Not Greg the super sweet boytoy. Michael let her run their relationship last season and look how that turned out.

Rosa’s new power is cool. That’s all I have to say on the matter.

So if Trevor went crazy and committed suicide while working on the Lockhart machine, how did Travis become so nuts? Did Alex referring to Trevor as the crazy boot maker who chased them through a corn field a continuity error? (I mean yeah, it’s gotta be.) Who’s in charge of checking things like this? Can I apply for this job? I think I might do a better job.

Obi-wan Junkyardy could be the best line this show has ever come up with. Especially now that Michael is, in fact, a jedi.

I think Liz has more chemistry with Jones than with Max. Nathan is an amazing actor. I had forgotten, since Max was so bland. But Jones reminds me of how much I loved him on General Hospital. Jones is just sexy. There’s no ifs ands or buts about it. And Liz knows she’s attracted to him. It’s impossible not to be. Cause he’s HOT! And as much as I wanted to bash my head against the table with how dumb her plan was, I loved watching the cat and mouse between them. And then she punched him. It was glorious!

I love that Eduardo knows about Malex. It was a nice parallel that last week we got the Michael and Sanders conversation, and then this week we got the Alex version. Even when they don’t have scenes together, they are still ever present in each other’s lives. I think Alex might not have even realized that the real reason he joined Deep Sky was Michael. And I don’t think that the Lockhart machine is going to drive him crazy like it did everyone else. Maybe Nora built it to be accessed by whoever Michael “bonds” with. He’ll figure it out and I’m very certain that it will hold the key to defeating Jones.

I would just like to point out that most of my theories get debunked pretty quickly. But I was 100% correct about Jones being the Dictator and Michael’s father. I am pretty darn proud of myself. I still think Louise might be Jones’ sister. Which would make Michael and Isobel cousins. That would be cool.

Also I love the fact that Rosa wound up saving the day. Cause she’s a badass.

Which brings us back to Maria and her mindscape. Jones is going to use her to access Patricia’s memories. But memories of what? The Lockhart machine? Whatever she was a part of at Caulfield? That part does interest me. But I do hope that Maria beats Jones by the skin of her teeth. Or maybe because of a fluke. If she kicks his ass or something I will be disappointed.

So lastly, I would just like to point out that today I read a review of this episode on another website and the reviewer referenced Gargamel. 👀👀 I don’t know how to feel about that.

Anyway, all in all it wasn’t a bad episode. But it’s not my fave. And I’m not even going to get into nobody worrying about Kyle. But next week I am expecting much bigger and much better things. Cause, you know, Malex and such. So until next time my lovelies!!

[aishiteru-clip]

Kdramas I watched in the second half of 2019

Some of these dramas did not necessarily air this year.

One Spring Night

Tells the story of a librarian who has been in a relationship for a long time. Her boyfriend decides that is time to get married but she is reluctant. She also meets a pharmacist by chance, who is a single dad. They fall in love and try to be together regardless of what people say.

This drama was a complete disappointment. Even though, the plot has a lot of potential and the cast was great, I feel it was quite boring. The story and character development were lacking. 5/10

My first love

Tells the story of two best friends who due to personal reasons end up living together along with two other friends. They have to experience love and friendship. 💞

This drama is super cute, the leads have good chemistry. I feel the story was fun and relatable cause it explores youth, friendship and love. I think it was a light story but really enjoyable. 8/10

Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo

When a total eclipse of the sun takes place, Hae-Soo travels back in time to the Goryeo era. There, she gets involved in a love triangle between 2 of the princes who are also fighting for the throne.

One of the best historical dramas I’ve ever seen in my life. The plot is amazing and the cast was unique. 9.5/10

Angel’s last mission: love

Tells the story of a ballerina who has a tough life and doesn’t believe in love. Dan is an angel who has to fulfill a mission to return to heaven. They eventually fall in love.

Gosh, this is the best drama of the year without a doubt. Shin Hye Sun is such a great actress. The story was creative and original. Every episode was absolutely worth it. The cast was really good. There isn’t a single aspect of this drama I don’t like. The lead couple had good chemistry, the writing, editing and photography were absolutely fantastic. 10/10

Rookie historian Goo Hae Ryung

Goo Hae-Ryung works as a historian. Female historians like Goo Hae-Ryung are generally looked down upon because of their gender. Yet, Goo Hae-Ryung fulfills her duty as a historian. She gets involved with Prince Lee Rim.

It was really enjoyable. The lead couple was really cute and the plot was a bit light but pretty interesting as well. 8/10

The Crowned Clown

Tells the story of a clown during Joseon era who looks exactly like the king. He will have to pretend to be the king and eventually falls in love with the queen.

The first half of this drama was really good. The first episodes were really intense. The second half was a bit lighter than the first one but as a whole it’s definitely such a great story. The cast was incredible and the plot amazing. 9/10

The Tale of Nokdu

Set in the Joseon dinasty, the series is about a man who disguises as a woman to enter a mysterious women-only village; and a young woman who does not want to become a kisaeng.

It was a really good drama. The lead couple was adorable. The story was a bit different, it was fun, dramatic and romantic. The characters were really good and the plot as well. 10/10

Vagabond

Tells the story of a stuntman who has his nephew dead on a plane crash. He ends up discovering national corruption and terrorism behind the accident.

In terms of production this drama is amazing. The lead actor did such a good job. The story was really interesting. The lead “couple” didn’t have chemistry (in my humble opinion), but there isn’t much romance anyways. The cast was great. 9.5/10

Extraordinary you

The story of a high school girl who realizes she is a comic character. She decides to create her own story and eventually falls in love.

The plot was interesting. The lead couple was really cute. I like the fact that almost 100% of the cast were rookie actors/actresses. An innovative, cute and beautiful story. 8/10

Crash Landing on you (currently airing)

Tells the story of a South Korean heiress who had an emergency landing in North Korea. He meets a North Korean officer who try to hide her, they eventually fall in love.

I have only watched 4 episodes so far but this is indeed the best drama I have seen in a while. The lead couple is such a perfect match. The story is creative and refreshing. I really enjoy every moment of this drama. This is definitely one of the best dramas of the decade. 10/10

Hotel del luna

The story of the ceo of hotel del luna. She is trapped in the hotel due to a terrible sin she committed long time ago. The hotels clients are ghosts. She hires and assistant and they fall in love.

The story gets really dark sometimes. The lead couple doesn’t have chemistry (in my humble opinion). Even tho the story is creative I don’t like the idea as a whole. IU is such a great actress but I feel this character doesn’t suit her at all. There’s way too much fantasy. The ost are actually really good and the cast it great as well. 7/10

[if-music-be-the-food-of-love]

Im gonna start watching Merlin, any reccomendations before I do? or something you want to say lol

Ooooooh, THAT’S SO EXCITING!!!! ✨💕✨💕✨💕✨💕 I am so happy for you bc it’s just so much fun. I love it love it love it!! I’ve been wanting to do a rewatch since I finished it. Please drop in and tell me what you think about it!! I’d love to hear your thoughts as you go. 💕💕💕

Honestly, the biggest thing about the show for me is that it’s straight up bi panic. Everyone is beautiful, like stunning. Every character is fun and interesting. They’re all incredible--even the ones you’re not supposed to root for or are only in one episode. I love them all so much. Every. Character. I read fics first (bc one of my favorite skam writers had written several, and I read them ALL), and when I found out that a lot of the characters had only been in one episode, I was shocked. They’re that iconic. (ngl, I suppressed my sexuality as a teen, and this show woke all that up. Nimueh had me thinking, and then Morgause’s entrance left me speechless. I was like, “yup, definitely bi, haha.” BBC Merlin was my bi awakening, lol). Gwen is lovely, just so kind and yet so feisty and determined. She’s basically the moral compass for everyone. Obviously I have a big thing for Merlin. He’s an adorkable badass. Arthur is just the greatest, most lovable dumbass, who is also a badass. The knights, oh man, the knights (most don’t show up til season 3 😕). I love them individually, and then when they get together and give each other shit...perfection. Gwaine. I adore Gwaine, and his hair, and blase attitude, tho he’s so loyal. Love how the knights all pick on him.  Elyan is the best swordsman, love him. Leon the long suffering. Poetry? hahahahahaha. Then of course there’s Morgana and Morgause, who are amazing and powerful and total badasses. I haven’t listed everyone, but trust me, I love them too.

Recommendations? I dunno. It’s campy and hilarious and sweet and thoughtful. You’ll have all the big emotions. Just keep an open mind, forget all the history you’ve ever learned, forget what you’ve read/learned about the legends and stories, and just sit back and have fun. I knew the ending before I started, but I actually prefer that with tv shows (never books or movies, tho, hmmm--i think it’s the time commitment required; i wanna be sure it’s worth it or whatever), so it wasn’t a big deal for me. I don’t know if it would be better not to, tho if you’re interested in watching the show bc you’ve seen 100 gifsets that make it look AWESOME, then you probably have an inkling as to how it goes. I started watching it bc of merthur, and I’d avoided it for YEARS bc I didn’t want to get involved in a non-canon ship (and knew that I would if I watched it), BUT I finally gave in after seeing too many gifsets and edits, and I’m so glad I did. Their relationship is so fun and nuanced and interesting, and what’s fun about merthur is that they have this relationship completely separate from everyone else. So, you can still love Gwen and root for her while also shipping merthur (believe me, it’s impossible to not love Gwen). The show isn’t perfect. Sometimes the character development disappears from one episode to another, and the CGI in season 1 can be hilarious. But I don’t watch it for that. I fell in love with the characters and their journey. Cool side note: the cast also shipped merthur, especially the Morgana and Gwen actors. The episode commentary is fun, and there are a few deleted scenes (that ppl assume were cut bc they were too blatantly romantic over platonic). It’s very interesting to watch the behind the scenes stuff. 

So, much like 911, I got pulled into the show bc of a ship that ppl wouldn’t stop talking about, and ended up falling in love with every single character along the way and just loving the show in general. I’m as invested in Morgana, Gwen, and Lancelot as I am with Arthur and Merlin (tho it should come as no surprise that Merlin is my favorite). And what’s really great is that the fandom is still alive and well a decade later. Fics, fanart, everything.

I hope you enjoy the show!!!! 💖💖💖 And thank you for asking me about it. As you probably know, I’m rather verbose, so I am happy to talk your ear off about it. Please please please let me know what you think, and I really hope you like it as much as I do. Have a lovely day and enjoy!!!

[rawsanma]

In Memoriam of "Shin Evangelion: Curse"

*The following article contains a full spoiler for "Evangelion 3.0+1.0".*

I sat together with a person who was not in birth when EOE was released, and after watching the film we talked a bit and thought about the people who passed away without ever seeing this. I understand that fans from the old series and those who came from the new series may have very different perceptions of Shin-Eva. So I'd like to first correct a few things I said in my first impressions.

It may be somewhere between an honorable movie and a mediocre movie in general, but as Evangelion, it's garbage.

After about halfway through the two hours and thirty-five minutes, I started to look at my watch again and again. The double ending, which is both a personal novel and a product, was a fleeting fantasy, and the two songs "One Last Kiss" and "beautiful world (da capo ver.)" were not used effectively in relation to the story, only being played in the staff roll.

When I saw the first 10 minutes of the movie that was released last year, I thought that perhaps Paris was chosen as the setting for the story of "humanity fighting together in the face of destruction" or "the expansion of the Eva world (not G Gundam, but G Eva!)", but that was not the case at all. He just wanted to depict the battle using the Eiffel Tower as a FATALITY,　I realized that he hadn't made a single millimeter of progress since when he asked Hayao Miyazaki if I could film only this action scene of Her Highness Kushana in the re-animation of Nausicaa, he was scolded, "That's why you're no good!"

At the beginning of the film, they try to carefully describe the things behind the scenes that were not told in Eva Q.  The third Ayanami like the TV version is the main character, and they go on and on about living in the countryside, copying "My Neighbor Totoro". The large family of our parent's home that we go back to during the summer vacation is presented as an image of happiness in life and a decent human being. It is also connected to Gendou's narrative during the Human Instrumentality Project but isn't it too Showa-era and too simple a solution? I am interested in how the young fans who are children of nuclear families who left their large families in the countryside and moved to the city saw the too sudden depiction of "life in the countryside". It was almost a gag to see Ayanami walking around in a plug suit which is a sexual orientation that has manifested itself after Space Battleship Yamato, in the images of pre and post-war farming villages depicted by recent NHK morning dramas. The director, influenced by his wife, must have been immersed in the LOHAS and vegan lifestyle as a fashion statement, which is only possible because he is an urbanite with too much stuff and too much money. As for this theme, it has already been presented in the watermelon field scene in the second film, and it is merely a re-presentation of the same theme in a diluted form.

I've pointed out before that Eva Q is "a crack in reality because of the loss of reality to rely on. "It's rude not to eat what you're served!", Shinji was scolded by Touji's father, who looked like a subversion of Hayao Miyazaki's work (Gedo Senki!). I have a simple question, how can the interior of a house become so old and wretched after only 14 years? How can a community of people of all ages be formed in just 14 years?　There was a line that implied that Touji had killed someone for the village, and it is possible that the director had extremely beautified the "Showa era" as a sanctuary where people who are hurt and regret their committing murder during the war as a soldier live nearby, and when he opened the last drawer after using up all the materials, he found the image of the original landscape of his childhood.

Misato and Kaji's child, which is only described for a few minutes, is also abrupt, and I don't feel that it is more than a plot device for the purpose of staging the reconciliation with Shinji later on. Some people seem to be moved by the fact that "behind Misato's cold attitude towards Shinji in Q, there was such a conflict in her mind," but it's the opposite. All the answers are just excuses after wasting nine years of work. Even if the wounds healed and treated with a gentle "I'm sorry," after being beaten severely by a raging DV husband, the fact of the beating would not disappear, and the wife would feel nothing but fear at the sudden change in her husband. To a situation that he had set to minus 100, he spent 2 hours and 35 minutes gradually pouring water drawn from other places and past works to bring it back to zero...I've never seen such a horrible match pump. Well, now that I'm writing this, I'm thinking that I've seen this before.

The relationship between Eva Q and Shin Eva is very similar to the relationship between "The Last Jedi" and "The rise of Skywalker" in Star Wars. In a self-absorbed rampage of conjecture that did not listen to the opinions of others, the historical stage of the series that had been built up was turned into a mess, and then the destroyed story was carefully built up again from the ground using unnecessary length, and only the shape of the story was created to end it without being disgraceful, and every scene that tries to make things more exciting is a copy of past work. As for Star Wars, since 8 and 9 were directed by different directors, I was able to settle my feelings of resentment towards Ryan and gratitude towards Abrams, respectively, but as for Evangelion, the director looks like a child who has been proud to clean up his own mess and have his female cronies praise and pat him on the head. Moreover, what kind of sympathy do you expect when you are told to "I'll make amends" for the mere act of wiping your ass after defecating, in a cool, Showa-era chivalrous tone?

In this film, as a recovery from Q and a summary of new Eva, there are elements throughout the story that critics can easily relate to the old Eva. “Oh, I can talk about this in connection with that!” This is what gives them a good impression and it has nothing to do with how the old fans perceive it. The director seems to have a dedicated person in charge of communicating and negotiating with the outside, but now he wants the critics to communicate with the fans about Shin-Eva. As long as he doesn't speak for himself, he can correct their interpretations later based on the "misunderstandings" of the people in between himself and his fans. This is a very Japanese-style system of surmising feelings, a system of authority that is formed when only a limited number of cronies are informed of the true intentions of the president. If I talk about it in too much detail, right-winged Yakuza will show up very soon, so to make it short, it is an indigenous control structure unique to Japan that originated from the "Mikado behind the bamboo blind". This time the director was very conscious of that, and I was able to see that Eva, who was a challenger, has become an authority that does not tolerate any criticism.

And what fan from the past could enjoy watching the endless battle scenes after Shinji returns to Wunder in the middle of the film? One after another, the sister ships of Wunder appear--there's almost no difference in appearance, but Ritsuko is able to guess their names the moment they appear. Right after the line "I'm pretty sure there's a fourth ship," the fourth ship comes crashing upon them from underneath, with no intention other than to make us laugh, right? As well as the repeated tenseless bombardment fight with no description of damage no matter how many artillery shells are hit, and it's quite painful being poured Asuka and Mari's Me-Strong Battles which are already enough by the time of Q, continuously down my throat like a goose with a funnel in its mouth. There's no way to synchronize my feelings with the screen, and it just creates an atmosphere as if the story is going on with the unattractive super-robot action that I pointed out in Q. It's no use pointing out, but the repair and supply problems of Wille side in a world where the industry has been destroyed were shown in the farming village part, though it was inadequate. But those of NERV side, an organization of only a man and an old man, was completely thrown away.

The last part of the story about the Human Instrumentality Project is like a fanzine where Gendou, Asuka, Kaworu, and Rei are lined up in a row and complemented in turn and then dismissed, whereas EOE was a total complement through Shinji. The director has tried to upgrade his framework by borrowing them from EOE and has failed miserably. Someone who has created works by putting his emotion and flair into a copy has dabbled in copying his own work. As a result, he had to confront his own sensibilities from when he was young and had to compare the old and the new by his old audience. Frankly speaking, only the techniques have been traced, the sound and the screen have become gorgeous, but the emotion and the sense have deteriorated. The face of the giant Ayanami that was replaced with a live-action one -- probably based on the face acting of Shinji's voice actor, and the "untested ordeal" of her tweet means this -- appears in the background like a gold folding screen in the high sand at a Japanese wedding reception. You're getting tired of all this, and you're not making it seriously, are you? The battle between Eva Unit01 and Eva Unit13 in Tokyo-III, which I expressed my anxiety about before the film's release, is a scene where the company's CG team can't produce what the director expects and he is so frustrated that he has the same mindset as in the final two episodes of the TV version, "I'd rather get a minus than a red", and after that, it became like a gag scene, including Eva fights in Misato's apartment and Shinji's school classroom, as if he was staged them in desperation. The side-shooting screenshot of the little Wunder charging at the head of the giant Ayanami is a picture of ”Cho Aniki (Japanese STG)” itself, and it's also meant to be funny, right? It's a series of loose, sloppy, and tenseless scenes that can't be compared to EOE.

What the hell have the CG team been doing for the past nine years, getting paid with no progress and making Eva look like an outdated piece of crap? Didn't anyone have the chivalrous spirit of the Showa era like "Don't embarrass our boss!"? Don't be so relieved when you get the green light! The director has just given up on you! There were a few scenes where the person at the top of the editing and collage, who has been making the coolest pictures, was not given as much good material as he used to be and seemed to make desperate staging in a way that he would never have given the green light in the past. It's been more than 10 years since Xapa was established, but I guess they don't have enough talent to meet the director's vision. Perhaps because of this, the conclusion of the film is exactly the same as the old one, that the director has no choice but to use his personal feelings to finish Eva, but the film ends up being a self-imitation of "Sincerely Yours". It is sad to see a person who "surpasses the original by putting his heart and soul into the copy" start to copy his own past works on the big screen of the theater, because he has become a big name in the animation world after reaching the age of 60, and there are no others left to be copied. However, right after "Komm, süsser Tod" started playing in the old movie, the scene where the titles of each episode and the reverse side of Cels were played in succession was projected on the wall of the studio using a projector -- the title of the new movie was added.  It made me mad and thought, "Don't touch my EOE with the dirty hands of the merchant.  I'll kill you."

The last things that the man who "transfers his own life onto films" presented in his costly self-published private novel were a naked confession of his own mental history up to the point where he met his wife, which he temporarily entrusted to Gendou, and the words "I think I loved you" and "I loved you" exchanged between himself and the former lover who could not be together and themselves who had separate spouses, just a reckoning of the muddled love affair that existed behind the scenes of EOE. I half-jokingly said that the distance between the director and Asuka's voice actor was important for the end of Eva, but it turned out to be true in a different way. During the recording session, Asuka's voice actor was told by the director, "I'm glad Miyamura is Asuka," which sent chills down my spine as it conveyed the horror of a creator who doesn't hide everything about his life and relationships and uses them to create his works.

In the scene where Shinji says "I liked you too" to the adult Asuka, who is wearing a tight latex suit and drawn in a more realistic character design (making us aware of the cosplay by Asuka's voice actor), while she is lying on the EOE beach, I thought "You guys should do this in a coffee shop or something between recording sessions! Don't make us watch middle-aged man and woman having unpleasant conversations on the big screen of the theater!", I almost screamed out. I think that's the scary part, the director's one-sided love for Asuka's voice actor is falsified by having the character say that she liked him, as if it was a mutual love. The director's statement at the beginning of the pamphlet says that he started working on the sequel right after Evangelion 2.0 without hesitation, using the worldview of "Q". I'm not trying to quote the line "You can change the reality you don't like by getting on Eva.", but it's not as if he's trying to cover up the fact, but he really believes that using his strong imagery, and it made me feel a bit chilly that there was no one around to correct his misconceptions.

At the end of Human Instrumentality Project, I wondered if the fact that a senior member of the movie industry had praised the shooting of EOE by flipping Cels over as a "tremendous deconstruction" was still fresh in his mind. This time, too, it was postponed after postponement, and even though the makings have been done in time, he showed the other side of the production with line drawings and roughs. The reason it was so innovative was that it was the first time anyone had tried it then, and now, 25 years later, it's just a rut. It's disgusting that everyone is praising the master's strange drawing habit and saying, "Oh yeah, that's it, that's it." As I've said before, it's like "defecating in a sixty-nine," which was successful because the first partner happened to be a scatologist. The expression of EOE was sharp and ”Rock’n’‐roll”, but Shin-Eva's "fun of anime images" has gone into the realm of traditional art, like slow "Gagaku".

The director hadn't decided who Mari Makinami was for a long time -- he was so indifferent to her that he threw the actor's acting plan to a sub-director -- but with Shin-Eva, he's changed her into an equal to Moyoco Anno, his wife. In other words, the flashy battle in the middle of the film, which is unimportant to many viewers, is revealed to have been a very pleasant pretend play for the director, in which he has his former love and his current wife fight on his favorite robots. Once again, we are shown the director's so-what-attitude, which has not progressed even a millimeter since "I'm an asshole," and which he can complete his work only by masturbation. So it's no wonder that they couldn't depict the extremely simple catharsis of Shinji's great success with Eva Unit01, which is what most of the old fans want. Because a robot with a pathetic old man on board can't get an erection due to impotence, let alone masturbation!　Oops, excuse me, sir.

And as I said before, it's time to realize that the English language has become so popular in Japan that it's become lame. You use Infinity, Another, Additional, Advanced, Commodity, and Imaginary, just because it sounds cool to you, right?　Everyone criticized the naming "Final Impact", but I never thought I'd see the time when I'd faint from the lack of taste and coolness in Evangelion, such as Another Impact, Additional Impact.

And the ending, with the wedding report in a live-action aerial shot of the director's hometown, newbie fans are screaming that it is like, "They're doing a very positive version of the old "Return to Reality!". But I felt it was too empty and cynical because it was intended to be read that way by the director. It depicts only the elation of marriage, and the pain of getting along with a partner and his or her family with different values is cut off (well, maybe Q was expressing the hardship of married life......). But isn't the emotional weight of a marriage report much higher when you meet your partner's parents?　The fact that he ended the movie by showing his own hometown instead of his wife's hometown leaves me with the impression that he's definitively an egotistical geek through and through. "You may have graduated from a good university and are making good money in the city, but if you're not married and don't have children, aren't you somehow humanly flawed?" After 25 years, Evangelion, which was such a forward-thinking Sci-Fi, is now completely in sync with the earthly ethics of Showa-era's farmers and farm horses. "I got married and it saved my life. I don't know about you, but why don't you try?" You can think what you want, but if you want to convey it as a message of salvation, you have to express it in the content of your work, not in your own talk.

I've been married for 20 years, I have two children, both of whom are about to reach the age of adulthood, I've paid off the mortgage on my home, and I'm finally at the end of raising my children, but all of that is just an outer shell of a social skin that has nothing to do with my true nature or where my soul is! There's no connection between what kind of life an individual lives in the real world and the Sci-Fi sense of wonder, in fact, there shouldn't be any connection! If you're a science fiction fan, take a page from the great Arthur C. Clarke! I was a nerd with a negative value of 100, but when I got married, I gradually poured the "common-sense values" of the Showa era into myself, and now I'm a true man with no negative value? Don't write such pathetic fiction proudly! Listen, what you presented to the audience at the end was the same thing that someone would say to you, "You seedless stallion!" It's the same kind of unethical and vulgar message that you shouldn't be giving! The old Eva became a classic of Japanimation, and no one was able to properly scold you, or you keep away those who tried, and the result of this is directly reflected in the ending of Shin Eva!　You've reached your 60th birthday and you only have such poor social common sense, damn it!

I'm sorry, I was so excited that I lost my control a little bit, just a little bit. I think the director is relying a little too much on his wife, who is ultimately a stranger on, to be his laison d'etre (lol). If they were to break up in the future, it would certainly be the soil for the next Eva, the content and development of which is completely predictable, but that is no longer my concern. I wonder if his wife doesn't like the fact that he's mentally dependent on her like this, and that it's being shown on screens all over the country. If it were me, I'd be furious, but since she's a creator, I guess she understands how he feels. Ignoring the other person's feelings and continuing to force what he believes to be love on her, thinking that it will make her happy, seems to me that there has been no progress at all since the way he treated his girlfriend 25 years ago. The person I want to hear from the most right now is not the self-proclaimed Eva fans who are looking at each other from the side and giving positive feedback in celebration of the final episode, but his wife. If the director had a child, he would not have been able to distinguish between his own ego and that of the child, and would have doted on his child, making a documentary film about his or her growth, but would most likely have turned into a controlling and poisonous parent in his or her adolescence. And he animated his feelings for his child who was rebelling against him, without the child's permission, considering it as a one-sided redemption for the child, and the child who was exposed to the whole country about their home life would have distanced from his father more and more.

In the end, Evangelion did not become a product like Gundam, but rather a robot animation that was the director's weird personal novel. The repeated use of the word "job" in the film has stuck in my mind, but in order for the studio to survive, it had to make Evangelion a product in this new series, and I'm sure that was the initial motivation behind the production of these new films. Your real "job" was to make Evangelion the same as Gundam, to protect the people who came to you because they loved Evangelion. Years from now, I can see a future where Xapa will be like Ghibli, behead the staff and continue as a copyright management company. The director, who didn't want to be embarrassed as a creator by a new challenge adopted the safe way -- I can't believe that I have to use the word "safe" for Evangelion -- to end the new series that relied on EOE only for himself, not for the future of the people who came to admire him. That's what Shin Evangelion is all about.

The good part? The fact that he didn't bring Shin Ultraman trailer at the end of the film makes me think he has grown up a bit. If you're declaring "Farewell, All Evangelions" with the intention of hurting, disappointing, and disinterested old fans like me, then your malice is unfathomable, and that's quite a feat. Brilliantly, your intentions have permanently killed a part of me that used to be an Eva fan.

As horrifying as it is to imagine, it must have crossed the director's mind to reschedule the film and set a new release date for March 11. The only reason he didn't do so is not that he has grown up to be a sensible adult, but rather because the idea of linking Evangelion 3.0 with the Great East Japan Earthquake was a fact that is too painful for him to make it public.

Ten years ago today, many lives were lost and Evangelion was destroyed.

This fact will never disappear, no matter how much the director denies and covers up with the "true" history. If there is any mission left for me as a fan, it is to continue to pass on this fact to future generations as a storyteller. It is a huge loss for Japanese fiction that the end of the great Evangelion has become a self-recovery work of the great failure of the reboot affected by the Great East Japan Earthquake, and that the potential of the great Evangelion has been consumed by the self-defense of someone who cannot admit his own mistakes, and I sincerely regret it. Shin Evangelion will be forever cursed by the dead, who yearn to see the sequel of Evangelion 2.0, and the living, who yearn to see the sequel of Evangelion 2.0.

This curse will be completed when it spreads, arrives, and is burned by the powers that be as a false history. I pray that my thoughts will reach him!

[the-ice-sculpture]

Reflecting on the Loki show

Hurray – fewer instances of cringey humour in Episode 2 than Episode 1!

Shame about there not being a single scene in the entire episode in Episode 2 where Loki felt in character

If this wasn’t a Loki show, I’d probably be enjoying it at the same level as a casual viewer of any other TV show. The plot’s interesting with a different take on time travel that I’ve seen, and there are no boring moments. But I can’t get past the lack of MCU Loki here. I just... Ugh. It’s so frustrating. No other media could get away with the main character suddenly having a personality transplant, but because it’s Marvel people are... fine with it, for some reason?

I can live with the tone and plot being different to what I’d do with it if I’d had the choice. I’ve said multiple times in the past that just because the show probably won’t give me what I want from it doesn’t mean that the show can’t be good in its own right. But what I didn’t anticipate before any of the trailers started coming out was that the Loki here might not feel like MCU Loki at all. I can forgive a lot of things, but I just can’t wrap my head around the sheer number of people who must have given the green light to all the decisions made about his characterisation. Those kinds of things can’t just be blamed on one person, it’d be a combination of the writers, directors, actors, producers...

I never thought that Loki finally getting to be the main character on screen (how many years have I wanted that to happen? 7? 8?) would be the thing to cause me to have my first ever thoughts about quitting this fandom.

I’m not having fun. I’m used to being more than a bit disappointed. I even stayed in the fandom after Thor: Ragnarok came about without much complaining, despite not being a fan of a fair amount of elements in it. I even stayed after Infinity War and Endgame came out with very little complaining either, despite how many things there were that I didn’t like in them. I even rewatched Game of Thrones after being just as unsatisfied with how it was tied up as everyone else was, and I still love the first four seasons and some scenes from later on (yes, even including Season 8).

But I’m not used to being this level of disappointed. The past month I’ve gone from having 5 different Loki WIPs I wanted to write to suddenly not being sure if I want to finish any of them at all. I mean, at least two of them will be finished because they’re oneshots for an event and I’ve already done most of the work so I might as well, but the contrast with my motivation is huge.

I don’t want to leave this fandom. I still have things I (hypothetically) want to write. I have over 100,000 words of various unpublished Loki fanfics that I’ve been working on. I don’t want them to go to waste. I want to finish what I started. It’s not like the enthusiasm for the idea of the stories has gone, it’s just... I don’t know, the overarching disappointment and not having fun in a fandom space anymore? How strongly Loki is associated with me feeling bitter and miserable now? How the show and the experience outside of it is doing the opposite of inspiring me?

I don’t to be that person either. You know, the one who has an entire blog dedicated to moaning about something. The one who seems determined to interpret everything in the worst possible light, regardless of rationalism. The one who seems like they’d never be satisfied unless something was made 100% their way, and if it wasn’t then of course it’s Problematic and that’s why it’s Just Plain Bad, and it’s nothing to do with personal taste and a certain amount of projection. The one who starts getting positive reinforcement about hating something, so it becomes a habit and before they know it, it’s part of their daily routine, and they’re still regularly doing it years later. The one who goes on about how ‘if you’re a true fan of [x] and really understood [x], this would bother you’, or worse, starts making it personal with the real people involved in the creation of the show.

But the experience of not liking the show is a lonely one. There are other people who don’t agree on his characterisation either, I know. But when the vast majority of people who watch it seem not to find the changes in his entire character jarring? When people are going around saying that it’s not until now that the writers have finally understood Loki? When you get people acting like anyone who voices any criticism whatsoever is ridiculous and shouldn’t be in the fandom and behaves like they might catch the Taint of Negativity if they were to associate with them? When any criticisms are dismissed as ‘people who just want to hate the show’?

Believe me, I don’t want to hate the show. I’d love to be happy with the show. But I'm not. This Loki doesn’t feel like MCU Loki. The only time he did feel like himself to me was during the scene towards the end of Episode 1 where he was watching parts of his life on screen. That’s it. Over one and a half hours into the series so far, 1/3 of the entire show. Out of all that, only one scene.

And now every time I see people being happy about the show it makes me feel resentful. And, no, I’m not going to add anything negative to their posts or say anything to them. If the show is what it is and there’s no changing it then it’s better at least some people get to enjoy it rather than it bringing about universal misery. I don’t want to take away anyone else’s happiness. I just to feel happy too, but I don’t, and I’m painfully aware of it.

I don’t know where I’m going with this, I think I’m just venting. 

I don’t know what the solution is either. Space from fandom for a bit? I mean, I’ve been doing this a bit already recently (not full commitment, just more than usual), but I like being able to use tumblr as an escape. Unfollow people/leave Discord groups? But there are people who I’ve had plenty of positive interactions with, and I don’t want to lose those connections.

It’s really dumb, but I like my fandom corner. I like knowing that if I post a fic, there’ll be a certain small group of people who’ll probably read it, and a smaller chunk of those who’ll comment on it, even all these years later. And there are still so many stories I want to tell with Loki, so many things I haven’t done yet, but... 

Yeah, I don’t know if my motivation will come back or not (I’m leaning towards maybe not). Or how much the fandom will change as a result of the show. I’d expect a wave newcomers, but if a lot of new fics being written are largely based on the show characterisation (and if reader expectation of Loki’s characterisation lies with that too), then I have little to no interest in it.

Oh, and another thing to add to my list of things I don’t want to be: I don’t want to be that person who is all ‘I’ve been here longer and know better and am therefore more of a real fan than any of you new people’. So there’s that.

Ultimately, I think I’m eventually going to have to choose between staying and trying to squash/somehow extinguish any bitter feelings, or leaving. I don’t like either of those options very much. It might be premature of me to post this before the show has ended because my feelings might change, but, unsurprisingly, writing is a good way of processing feelings and I’ve been having a lot of them that need processing.

In case anyone’s actually read this obscene amount of rambling, I’m okay, I’m not, like, weeping over this as I write or anything. But it’s still not a great feeling to have a place that was once my favourite place for escapism and creativity to make me feel like I might not be welcome or like I might not want to be there. And it’s not like I can easily just switch over to another fandom to write for, because there are no other characters who have inspired me to write anywhere near much as Loki has. So, yes, I’m feeling a little sorry for myself. All over a fictional TV show. I repeat: it’s dumb.

[gigslist]

34+ Voiceover Roles & 3 Musician Open Calls - Work From Home - Paid

'F*cking Sober' Podcast

22 + Roles

3 Open Calls for Musicians With Their Own Music

PAID WORK FROM HOME NON UNION

Deadline : September 15, 2021 2:00 PM

Somehow9am Productions // F*cking Sober: the first 90 days Podcast

Katie Mack, coord.

:"A call for artists in recovery for the 2nd Season of The Webby Award Winning Podcast Series 'F*cking Sober: the first 90 days.' We are looking for voice over talent and musicians/music producers for 'FS: Shadai.' 'F*cking Sober' is a semi-comedic mostly non-fictional narrative podcast following Shadai’s first 90 days of getting sober. Thirty-five year old Shadai is the black, queer, strong female in advertising— so what if she keeps shots in her bra for between meetings, right? But after a shitshow holiday party, a fuzzy cop encounter, and a disaster presentation with the new big account, Dry January doesn’t seem like such a bad idea. Maybe Dry Forever is better. This is what it looks, acts, and feels like to get f*cking sober. This 8 episode serialized show features music by artists with their own story with recovery. F*cking Sober Season 1: Anita has received 15k downloads since it’s release in Nov 2020, and received a 2021 Webby Nomination for Best Limited Series, and a Webby Win for Best Writing for a Podcast. At this time we are only looking to work with artists who have a relationship/understanding of recovery. Please follow instructions for submitting and what to include in the cover letter to be considered! Thank you! Listen to Season 1 to get the vibe: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/f-cking-sober-the-first-90-days/id1538804959?i=1000499155627 And check out: www.fckingsoberpodcast.com @fckingsober90_podcast More information about Somehow9am Productions & Katie Mack (Producer): www.somehow9amproductions.com www.mackstage.com"

Roles

Shadai (Voiceover): Female, 18+WORK FROM HOMEproduction states: "Note: We are only accepting submissions from artists who have their own story in recovery, TY! 35 year old, black, queer, cis gender female attorney with a dry sense of humor, who has strong opinions and shares them sometimes, is a powerhouse and knows it all… until… until she doesn’t. Please note your experience with improv/comedy in your cover letter If you have writing experience or are interested in writing please note this in your cover letter. We will be giving writing credits to the right candidate who desires to contribute to the molding of this character."Required Media: Voice Reel

Other Characters (Voiceover): 20-70

"Note: We are only accepting submissions from artists who have their own story in recovery, TY! We are looking for diversity in every sense of the word, from all genders, to ages, to ethnicities, to lived experiences, to food preferences!! In short, we are looking to cast dope, interesting people. Looking to cast various characters through out the S2 Shadai, including but not limited to:

Dad (black, army veteran, a dad’s dad)

Mom (black, hyper critical, the opposite of Shadai)

Dana (any ethnicity, work enemy)

Coco (white, work bestie)

JewBoo aka Therapist (Jewish, confidant, motherly, with a special sense of humor)

Miriam (black, best friend and ex-lover who tells it like it is)

Galen (white, gay, best friend who is warm and caring and pushy)

15 other characters Please note any experience you may have with comedy/improv if any. Please submit your reel along with your cover letter."Required Media: Voice Reel, Cover Letter

Musicians (BIPOC Artists in Recovery) (Voiceover): 18+ music from BIPOC identifying artists.

Musicians (Queer Identifying Artist in Recovery) (Voiceover): 18+ music by Queer Artists.

Musicians (Non-BIPOC/Non-Queer Artists in Recovery) (Voiceover): 18+ music from non-BIPOC or non-Queer Identifying Artists in recovery.

"To be produced over the course of October 2021 - January 2022 Shadai’s commitment is estimated at two hrs/wk. Other characters 30mins. Musicians, all work should already exist. Please be prepared to send stems or stripped down tracks."

Compensation & Union Contract Details

Stipend: $25 - $75Production states: "Shadai (Lead Character), $550 for full season. All Other Characters: $25-$50 per episode. Musicians: $25-$75 per song per episode. Sync license contract."

Seeking talent: Nationwide (United States)

Website:http://www.fckingsoberpodcast.com

======================================

'Rain: Series III'

12 Voiceover Roles

PAID WORK FROM HOME NONUNION

Deadline: September 14, 2021 8:59 PM

JKPRising James Klim, filmmaker

Seeking voiceover talent for "Rain: Series III," a web-series, created in the video game Halo Reach on MCC via Xbox/PC. "This series will have a total of 13 episodes. I have many characters to cast, 12 specifically. If you wish to learn more about the show, you can check out my documentary series regarding the show. You can view the first episode here - www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlzPQvJS3og A little bit about me, I am a freelance filmmaker who actually got into film through making Halo videos as a kid when I was younger. You can check out some of my work here - www.jkprising.com/ I've always wanted to return to my roots & finish a series I was never able to before, but now I have the time to focus on it. This is a paid position. Rates depend on each character as some have more lines than others & vice versa. I am not the wealthiest person in the world, but I will to compensate each voice actor for their performance. My budget per character is between $100 - $300. This again, all varies per character. In this post, there is a video of what the character will look like in the series. I have also attached a single page from a random episode script from the show. The highlighted lines are what the character will say. There will also be non verbal lines highlighted, this is meant to be voiced kind of like an anime, where every movement usually has sounds. Typically, how would you make a sound if you did any of the following, head turn, turns around, surprised gasp, sighs, etc. Since this a paid gig, I am expecting a professional voice audition & if hired, continued professional audio. This means minimum to no background noise. The audio needs to be crisp."

Roles

Chloe Moody (Voiceover): Female, 18-35WORK FROM HOME29. Voice type: English/United Kingdom accent, polite, doesn't get mad often but when she does, she loses it, anxious, low self esteem, hopeful. Chloe Moody used to be a psychiatrist, but after the death of her soon to be husband, she spiraled into insanity. She met someone later on in life named Tom Rains, who looked exactly like her dead boyfriend. She became obsessed with him & tried to get with him, which sunk her further into a deep depression. She finally hit rock bottom, which causes her to seek out help from the very people she used to serve. Chloe meets a psychiatrist named Jennifer, who is able to help herself almost fully recover. Chloe eventually accidently runs back into Tom, which triggers Chloe to try one last time. After a final rejection, Chloe comes to the realization that she is not redeemable & decides to take her own life in front of Tom. Chloe's death, triggers a massive event for Tom Rains, which has massive ramifications for the series. Chloe is a major character and will appear in a couple episodes.Languages:

English

Accents:

British

Australian

Voice Styles:

Soft

Softspoken

Crazy

Compassionate

Sad

Angry

Required Media: Voice Reel

Dark Daryl (Voiceover): Male, 18-40WORK FROM HOME

32, voice type: Very dark presence, evil. sadistic, look at examples like Yami Marik from the Original Yu-Gi-Oh - www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xaa_ycud6o, manic, darkness. Dark Daryl is the darkness of his original persona, Daryl. Daryl accidentally acquired a powerful technology known as an imperium. This caused Daryl to lose himself to it at some point & was taken over by an alternate personality named, The Professor, which caused tons of damage. When Daryl came back to his senses, the damage had been done & others abandoned him, which caused him to grow angry at something that he didn't consciously do. Daryl once again loses himself to the imperium, which turns into Dark Daryl, a representation of all the anger & hatred he endured over the course of his past uncontrollable actions. Dark Daryl is very aggressive, sadistic & wants to destroy the people who wronged him in the past. Eventually, he comes face to face with Daryl & fights to stay as the one who remains in control, even if that means killing Daryl & anyone who gets in his way. Dark Daryl is a character who appears in the second half of the show, & becomes the series main villain. He will appear in many episodes.

Languages:

English

Voice Styles:

Aggressive

Angry

Evil

Commanding

Straightforward

Scary

Dangerous

Intimidating

Demonic

Required Media: Voice Reel

Nikki (Voiceover): Female, 18-35 WORK FROM HOME

25. Voice type: Energetic, passionate, caring, open-minded, loving, positive, independent, fighter. Nikki used to date Tom Rains. She didn't really have much going for her, as she had no ambition at all during that time of her life. After Tom broke up with her, this was quite the shock to Nikki. It caused her to really dive deep within herself & from that moment, she tried to learn more about herself. She discovered a love for storytelling, & so went into journalism. Nikki is now dating Jennifer & they have been together for almost a year. Nikki eventually gets wrapped up in a major conspiracy, which drags many of her friends in with her. She is in for the story of her entire career. Nikki is a major character and will appear in many episodes.

Languages:

English

Voice Styles:

Comforting

Compassionate

Caring

Amusing

Animated

Brave

Heroic

Required Media: Voice Reel

Talent works remotely with professional recording equipment.

Professional Pay: $100 - $300Pays between $100-$300 depending on character.

Nationwide (United States)

Additional Materials

Website: https://www.jkprising.com/

Nikki Audition.pdf - https://d26oc3sg82pgk3.cloudfront.net/files/media/uploads/casting_call/7f95c65b-ab53-43d3-a66b-9e59d1041acb.pdf

Dark Daryl Audition.pdf - https://d26oc3sg82pgk3.cloudfront.net/files/media/uploads/casting_call/00cfdf46-84c1-4da6-9dee-91c7bcdeed3d.pdf

Chloe Moody Audition.pdf https://d26oc3sg82pgk3.cloudfront.net/files/media/uploads/casting_call/186cbe9e-9c7e-4ce5-bcbe-2407a9dec00b.pdf

[ultrahpfan5blog]

My very belated thoughts on Game of Thrones and season 8 in particular

I feel like I have a somewhat unique perspective on GoT. The show has been such a pop culture phenomenon that I feel that fans have been invested in it for years, either having been book fans who watched the show, or those having watched the show for the better part of a decade. For me, I was never a part of the fandom because I never watched the show until it was in season 7. The books sound great but because I can’t stand reading incomplete series, I have never read them, and at this point, it just feels unlikely that GRRM will end up finishing the series. That sucks because its just the sort of fiction that I would love. I started watching GoT in season 7, and then in season 8. Obviously, I had very little clue what was going on other than the broad strokes and I was watching purely because the spectacle and scale was something I had never seen before on tv. On that front alone it was entertaining. Given the incredibly divisive reaction, I didn’t feel like spending the amount of hours required to watch the show from scratch, but because covid ended up impacting so many ongoing tv shows and movies, I ended up deciding to give it a go. I started a couple of months ago and just finished season 8 a couple of days ago. Its been quite an experience, belated as it may be.

I still feel that I view the show differently than a lot of people. Obviously, its a very different emotional commitment for me, having watched the show in 2 months whereas other have watched the show for about 10 years. Having not read the books, I don’t have the issue of comparing the quality of the books to the show. And given I saw season 8, I watched the show with the ending in mind, so I could understand if the ending made sense to me or not.

On the whole, the show is worth a lot of applause. The production, acting, music, writing, visuals etc... is something I have never seen on tv. Juggling such a huge cast of characters with so many ongoing storylines is an incredible achievement. Say what you will about season 8′s writing, but from a production, scale, and performance standpoint, the show remained stellar all the way through. And for that, I do think D&D deserve credit. I know that is an unpopular thing to say but they still have created something that is truly one of a kind. The show is definitely not perfect, even before season 8. There are storylines that drag, storylines that aren’t given the time they deserve, character developments that don’t completely work etc... but I feel that is part and parcel of every long running show. There are very few that are perfect, and for the sheer complexity of the narrative, its amazing that the show isn’t more convoluted. I do agree that the final 2 seasons are the weakest seasons of the lot. I still think season 7 is very good, and the first half of season 8 I also like a lot, but seasons 1-6 are superb. Its difficult for me the select my favorite season. I suppose season 4 is probably at the top. Its kind of the end of the era season, with the death of Joffrey, Tyrion’s trial, then him leaving Westoros. Arya and Sandor’s time together coming to an end with her traveling to Braavos, death of Tywin, and Jon rising in the ranks of the Nights Watch and becoming a more prominent character in the show. I love seasons 5-6 because of the rise of Jon. Season 2 arc of Tyrion as hand of the King was also excellent. My favorite episodes all come from these seasons. I love the battle episodes, with Blackwater, Hardhome, and Battle of the Bastards being 3 of my favorite eps. The Laws of Gods and Men is another episode I love just for the climax where Peter Dinklage just tears into the scene with his full might. I also loved Pedro Pascal as Oberyn in season 4. He added a unique quality and I was sad to see him not last past season 4. There were a few storylines that I wasn’t completely fond of. The early years of Daenerys weren’t the most compelling, Arya in Braavos was just too slow for my taste, the Littlefinger and Sansa storyline in season 4 also felt like they were treading water and then they backtrack on Sansa’s development in season 5. Also, Staanis was someone who went a little too batshit crazy in his lust for power. Felt a little out of character.

Now, when it comes to season 8, There are a lot of complaints about a lot of things. I will say that the main issue with season 8 is that it crams what should be 2 seasons of storylines and crams it into a single 6 episode season. I think virtually every complaint can be traced back to that. I actually really like episodes 1 and 2. Especially episode 2. Brienne’s knighting is actually very touching. Its great to see characters reuniting and characters meeting for the first time. I know lots of people complained about episode 3 and while its not as good as the other 3 battle episodes that I mentioned before, I still think its excellent. I did not have the lighting problem that others had. I watched it on my laptop and I could see everything. The episode is titled ‘The Long Night’ so I expected things to be dark, but it isn’t as if I had trouble seeing what happened. The episode is incredibly intense and while its a bit difficult o figure out how so many survived and there are some questionable tactics for sure, its still quite a spectacular spectacle. My only issue with the episode is really all Jon related, which I will get back to in a bit. 

I know that Daenerys turning into the mad queen is a huge point of contention for the season. While I absolutely agree that that character arc went from 0 to a 100 way too fast, I don’t think it was completely out of the blue. Knowing the ending, I kept an eye on Daenerys, and I think there are a lot of instances where her first instinct to fixing problems has been to unleash her dragons. She has had characters around her like Selmy, Jorah, later Tyrion, even Daario, who have tempered that instinct somewhat. But that is still a natural instinct for her. Not to mention, in Essos, she was dealing with a fairly black and white issue when it comes to slavery. And she mistakenly thought, her experiences in Essos would translate to Westoros. She came with the idea that the common people would support her without fully processing the idea that she was bringing foreign armies into their land and three dragons, which had not been seen by people for generations. So they had legitimate reasons for fear. So it wasn’t completely out of the blue that she unraveled when confronted with the revelations that she was feared more than she was loved and that she did not have the sort of universal support she thought she would have. Obviously, that was compounded by the losses that she tacked up one after another. Definitely, one more season was required to make that a satisfactory arc, but I don’t think it was completely random. And honestly, once she did what she did in episode 5, she was never going to survive the show. I will say this, Emilia Clarke was outstanding in season 8. She was never the cast member who stood out in seasons past, but season 8 was really her season. While the character development was rushed, she sold every scene and earned her lead actress emmy nomination.

There are some endings which people hated which I understood. Like Jaime’s ending, which people were pretty pissed about, is an ending I quite get. As much as we love the story of redemption, the Cersei and Jaime bond was just too deep and toxic for him to so easily extricate himself. I get why he would be drawn back to her when he knew she was in danger. I think Lena and Nikolaj really sold their final scenes together. I felt for Lena as an actress. As a result of the short season, she really didn’t get much to do all season. Her death scene is really the only time she gets material to chew on. So that was a pity. I think Brienne and Sandor Clegane were two characters for whom their endings were perfect. Brienne becoming a knight of the six kingdoms and Clegane finally getting revenge on his brother was extremely satisfying. Theon’s ending was pretty much perfect. Sansa becoming queen in the North makes sense. The show seemed to be building towards it. Sophie Tuner gets some good material in the final season where you can see that there is a lot happening in her head and not all of it is altruistic. She does have a power hungry side to her, even if she’s not self destructively so. Maisie Williams was strong again. I wasn’t a huge fan of her getting to kill the Night King over Jon but there lots of good moments she has with Jon, Sandor, Gendry, Sansa etc... Bran becoming King of the six Kingdoms is definitely not the greatest ending. I don’t know whose decision it was to turn Bran into a robot and have him do nothing other than sit and stare, but it definitely wasn’t the greatest. I can’t imagine it was a particularly satisfying experience as an actor for Isaac. I did enjoy a couple of moments with him and Jaime, harking back to season 1.

The two other major characters are Tyrion and Jon. Certainly the finale is very heavily centered on those two. I do agree with the notion that they really dumbed down on Tyrion’s intelligence as he makes a lot of wrong moves in the last couple of seasons. But Peter Dinklage the actor has never disappointed. His performance in the finale ranks as one of his finest on the show. There has never been a time when he has not given his all. Him ending up as the hand is pretty effective ending. He is a humbled man, admitting that he’s not as smart as he thought he was. So maybe he would be a better hand as a result of that experience. Jon’s ending is another controversial one. I am in the audience who really wasn’t a fan of how Jon was treated in season 8. Kit Harington was quite poorly served in season 8, which was a bit of a whiplash since Jon was arguably at his most badass in season 5-7 and became a huge a fan favorite. Certainly he took over from Dinklage as the de facto male lead of the show. The character only comes back to life at the very end of episode 5. Part of that is probably the point. That Jon became too bent to Daenerys’ will, as Varys said.to Tyrion. It took Daenerys burning down King’s Landing to wake him up. I get that from a narrative standpoint, buts its dissatisfying from a character perspective when its the final season. Certainly I found it very strange how little role he played in The Long Night, given the White Walker storyline was Jon’s primary storyline on the show. Put aside killing the Night King, a showdown which was promised on the show, he didn’t even do much else in the episode. At the very least he should have gotten to destroy the undead Viserion. The memes about his dialogue in the season aren’t unfounded. But, I will say that Kit Harington is fantastic in the series finale. He arguable has the centerpoint scenes of the finale, the two scenes with Tyrion, and then the scene with Danaerys where he is literally begging her to give him a reason not to kill her and she keeps saying the wrong thing. Certainly Peter and Kit end the season on a high note. Him ending up with the Wildlings seems appropriate because Jon never seemed cut out to be King, nor did he ever want that responsibility. He probably would have been better than Bran, but its a decent enough ending for him. In the end, the way the show ends I was mostly ok with, but the path to getting there should have come with one extra season at least.

In the end, the production and the acting will always be something I will remember. I didn’t even mention great performances from Sean Bean, Charles Dance, Alfie Allen, Stephen Dillane, Conleth Hill, Aiden Gillen, Diana Rigg, Jerome Flynn, Liam Cunningham among many others over the years. So even though I do have issues with the final season, I feel that the good far outweighs the bad when it comes to the show. Its not a show I foresee rewatching any time soon since its one of those shows that requires some digestion and a lot of hours, but I certainly don’t regret the time I gave to it.

[monstatrbl]

Itaewon Class Thoughts

Okay with Itaewon Class done, I have a lot of thoughts regarding the drama. 

First things first, let me be clear that I love this drama. I truly truly truly loved it. I 100% recommend it to anyone who has not had the chance to watch it yet (also please don’t read any further if you don’t want spoilers). That being said, that does not mean I did not have a few qualms with it. 

Things I didn't like: 

- Yi Seo and Sae Ro Yi’s love story. Yes some of their scenes were cute but I honestly, thought the drama would have been better without it. I also thought in episode 14/15 where everything was about Ye Seo for Sae Ro Yi and not anyone else was kind of annoying to me. I don’t like that Sae Ro Yi’s entire happiness once again is placed inside a single person. Like how it was with his dad. I wish his happiness was within him instead of being dependant on another individual. If anything happened to Yi Seo, he would go right back to how he was when his dad passed and I don’t know how I feel about that. How I feel about the lack of recognition of the other people around him who also care for him. 

- While I’m not totally mad at it, I wish they did more to hint or show Soo Ah’s whistleblower plot in the earlier episodes. Instead it felt like a random scrap thrown in and rushed through to make sure everyone had a happy ending. 

- Geun Soo’s development and the way his story was handled. I get what they were trying to do with it but I just didn’t love the full explanation tbh or how it was done. I also don’t like how Yi Seo was so cruel to him tbh. Like the scene where she said "does sorry fix things? Did you just do it to make you feel better?" I honestly wanted to punch her lol. Like who does she think she is?! As if she hasn’t done the exact same things before in using him to get somewhere for her benefit. And she never apologized or tried to fix it. Instead she continued to use him and make him feel like shit. Not to say he is excused from what he did to Hyun Yi because of that, he absolutely isn’t. Also, WHY DID NO ONE CARE THAT GEUN SOO WAS KIDNAPPED TOO?! As if he wasn’t suffering there too. Ughh and when she ran away from him when they were both cornered after saying we’ll attack them together, leaving him to fend for himself when all he’s tried to do is protect her? I truly was pissed. I just wish the storyline didn’t have to go this way honestly. 

- Toni’s lack of screen time :’( 

- I know it was alluded to but the lack of official confirmation that Hyun Yi and Seung Kwan got together :( I wanted to see an official going out with me scene. 

Things I liked: 

- PARK SEO JOON. That’s it. That’s the post. I have loved this man for a long time and have been dedicatedly watching all of his works. I have always said he was a good actor but this particular drama I think he really showed his capability and versatility as an actor. The way he made me SOB and feel for him within the first episode is absolutely incredible and has everything to do with his top tier acting ability. He deserves all the recognition for this drama. I can’t wait for his next work!

- THE PLOT! I loved the story! I truly truly did. The way they had me 100% emotionally committed to the storyline really just shows how good the writing and plot development was. 

- The squad! I loved how supportive they were of each other and how they grew together. Their development as individuals is credited to them being a group and it shows the importance of having good/supportive people around you. 

- He was barely in it but the DAD. Man every scene he was in it had me in tears. My parents are really important to me and I loved seeing that same importance mirrored in this show. 

- Yoo Jae-Myung. This man really brought what it meant to be an antagonist. I hated his character’s guts throughout the show and that just points to how well he acted. So all the props to him and his acting! I will definitely look out to see what else he chooses to act in. 

- THE TOPICS!!! They covered a lot of important topics in this show and did it well! Tackling topics like transgenderism and racism is no easy feat especially with how one wrong move can ruin the entire drama. That is not to say writers should just ignore these topics but that they truly do deserve to be treated right if they are brought up and Itaewon did just that. I was extremely happy and pleased with the way the issues were dealt. 

- The camerawork. Idk how to explain this but the subtle camera shifts and angles in this show is just amazing. I loved the way this show was shot.

- HYUN YI!! I LOVED HER AND I WISH WE SAW MORE OF HER!! 

- SEUNG KWAN!! HIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT *chef’s kiss*!! I loved him a whole lot and that scene of him mirroring Sae Ro Yi’s line had be screaming with joy! 

- The quotes! Some of the lines in this show truly will end up sticking with me for the rest of my life. That’s how much impact it had. 

- THE PARK BO GUM CAMEO!! I missed his face!!! Also look how cute his smile is 🥺💞

Anyways I can probably make this longer but I don’t wanna make this longer than it already is. I will be making a whole different post for Geun Won’s character because I just think there is so much to be said about him. 

Lastly, thank you to everyone who worked on Itaewon Class for an amazing drama!! 

[paceypeternathanslawyer]

Top 10 Male TV Characters (In No Particular Order)

Gilbert Blythe (Anne With An E)

What’s there to say about Gilbert Blythe that hasn’t already been said? He’s one of the most iconic literary leading men ever. And been adapted amazingly by Jonathan Crombie and most recently by Lucas Jade Zumann. I think one the reasons that Gil’s character has still held up so much, is that he was a guy who was attracted to Anne partly because she was smart. They were both at the top of their class, and Gil never really felt threatened. He respected Anne, and loved her for who she was. In Anne With An E, they really gave the character some more depth that I really appreciated. Lucas makes you feel so much sympathy for that character cause of his amazingly real performance.

Lenny Bruce (The Marvelous Mrs Maisel) 

Seriously, I don’t know too much about Lenny Bruce the real life comedian, but Luke Kirby’s characterization of him is one of the most amazing things I have ever seen. The charm!! The charisma!! The beauty!! Every single time he’s on screen, it’s absolutely captivating and he elevates every episode he’s in. Also Luke Kirby has such respect for Lenny and you can tell any time he talks about him, the amount of care and research he put into this role. There’s a reason he won a freaking Emmy for this role!!! He’s by far the best part of The Marvelous Mrs Maisel.

Stanley Barber (I Am Not Ok With This)

Stanley Barber!!!!!!!!! He’s another character who brings so much to the show. I Am Not Ok With This would be good without him.... but would it be a show that I would be a fan of... probably not. Wyatt is such an amazing actor, he can play the drama and the comedy so equally well. Stanley should be protected at all costs!!!

Luke Danes (Gilmore Girls)

Luke is such a good guy. So strong not just physically but also emotionally. He’s such a rock, and a dependable guy. A fantastic dad to both April and Rory!!! An amazing husband (not perfect.... but then again who is) to Lorelai. A great uncle to Jess. Luke is an indispensable presence in Gilmore Girls.

Mike Wheeler (Stranger Things)

I think out of all the characters in Stranger Things, I relate the most to Mike. We are both extremely loyal and would die for those we care about. We are both passionate people, and very emotional (though I would say that Mike is a little more moody than I am). I also relate to being way ahead of my peers in certain ways. I recall being a little girl and crushing hard on the boys around me, while my peers were still in the cooty stages. That’s really Mike is S1, where he’s all into El and all his friends are like forget girls, let’s play D&D. All this to say... an attack on Mike is an attack on me!!! So come at me bro!!!!! :)

Steve Harrington (Stranger Things)

Steve “The Hair” Harrington. King of Hawkins High himself. Mr Cool. Mr Funny. Ninja. Babysitter. I love Steve so much... words can’t even describe. I can even boast of being a Steve defender since S1. I knew the moment he called himself “Ninja” after stumbling through Nancy’s window, that he couldn’t be all bad!!!! It’s all thanks to Joe’s charm, charisma, and sense of humor that we have the Steve we know and love.

Jim Hopper (Stranger Things)

Hopper is such an fantastic and well rounded/interesting character. I love how protective and caring he is. Total badass, and I am indescribably happy that we will continue to see his beautiful face in future seasons. David is such an underrated actor, the fact that he hasn’t won an Emmy is a travesty.

Logan Echolls (Veronica Mars)

LOGAN!!!! There is no greater TV character arc than Logan Echolls, he went from being a completely deplorable character in S1 to Season 4 where he’s one step away from a saint. In S1, he’s one step away from being a psychopath, and then they start to peel the layers and you see that his dad is abusive, his dad is also an actor so he has papparazzi on his back all the time cause he’s the son of a famous actor. His mother then commits suicide.... and SPOILER ALERT..... his dad turns out to be a psychotic murderer who killed Logan’s ex girlfriend and then his dad proceeded to attempt to murder his current girlfriend. This kid has been through more than anyone ever should. But Logan realizes his flaws and works to be a better person. He goes into the navy (which leads to Logan in a uniform.... need I say more). He also goes to therapy and betters himself. Every time he came on screen during S4, I couldn’t help but swoon. He’s such a hero and such an amazing man, who bettered himself and made himself worthy of Veronica. Even though, Veronica was not her greatest during S4 and could have benefited from therapy herself.

Burton Guster (Psych)

Gus is so funny. Yes, a lot of Psych centers around Shawn, but the show would be nothing without Gus. He’s funny, dynamic, and a sensible figure. Which Shawn desperately needs. Also Dule Hill is an tremendous actor and the fact that he is able to get into that character so easily for the movies, years after the series ended is so unique. 

Shawn Spencer (Psych)

I kind of went into Shawn in Gus’ section. It’s hard to think of different things to say about him, cause over the years Shawn and Gus kind of become like one unit. Shawn is hilarious and dynamic. I love what a talented investigator he is. He could have been a police officer if he wanted to be. After all, he did get 100% on his detective exam. I love the trope of a guy who doesn’t really take a lot seriously or really apply himself and then you peel the layers and find that he’s really an elite detective or whatever (you can fill in the blank). 

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

As a drama/performance student who’s hoping to go into acting, let me just say right now that Rachel Berry would never have made it on Broadway.

Oh, she has talent and there’s no denying that. But so do so many other girls and boys. You can’t make it in the business based on talent alone - you don’t get to become a success immediately, you have to work your way up and prove that you’re right for a role or for success. You have to work hard and always remember to keep learning.

That was something that was taught to us very early on in drama - no matter who you are or where you come from, whether you’re an amateur student or a success movie star, you can ALWAYS learn. You should always be challenging yourself and learning. You should always strive to improve and better yourself whenever possible.

Rachel never seemed to want to do that. She got into NYADA (after stalking the dean, which is something else I’ll go into in a minute) and then quit before finishing her education to do Funny Girl - which she then quit to do a TV show that failed. First of all, a casting director is going to take one look at this behavior and immediately decide “no - she cannot commit”. You don’t abandon your studies or the role you do have just because something that’s only maybe better comes along. Obviously many great actors do TV shows and pilots that fail, that’s not my issue - my issue with Rachel is that she never put the work in. It was always the bare minimum. “Oh, I’ve done a year and a half of studying at the best arts academy in NY, I don’t need to study anymore because I got one part on stage” - it does NOT work like that. She couldn’t commit which is a risky behavior in ANY job.

Part of being an actor or performer is criticism - you are ALWAYS subject to criticism. You will NEVER make it in the business if you can’t handle that criticism. Rachel would throw bitch fits and sob and play the victim EVERY SINGLE TIME someone made the slightest criticism of her.

Let’s delve deeper - first, Cassandra July.

Yes, Miss July was a bit mean and rude - but she’s a professor at a top NY arts academy. If you get into a top arts academy like NYADA is in the show, you are not there to fuck around - anyone who gets in has to be committed 100% to their studies, both practical and theoretical. Cassandra July is not there to baby the students and lift their egos - she is there to train and prepare them for the harsh reality of seeking a career in the arts.

In the very first episode of S4, on her first day in class, Rachel shows blatant disrespect to a professor by rolling her eyes. You do not do that to a professor in any subject, let alone a dance teacher. If you can’t respect your teachers or the people who you are learning from, you should not seek a career in the arts. This also goes for ANYONE you work with; if you work with a director or actor on a play or on a TV show, for example, you should always seek to learn from them, even if it’s something small. 

If you are studying the arts, especially at a level where they’re preparing you to be professional actors/singers/dancers, they HAVE to be hard on you. Hell, I didn’t even go to drama school but my drama teachers were always brutally honest with me. They made it clear that “Megan, you HAVE to be louder”, “you MUST learn your lines and practice without a script”, “your accents are terrible”, “don’t just stand there and recite lines! Move!” Etc. Etc. It may be harsh but Cassandra has to be brutally honest so that the kids know what they’re in for; yeah, they’ll get told that their noses are too big for a part. Yeah, they’ll be told “you need to drop a few pounds” or that they’re ugly, etc. It’s sad but true.

“Your pique turns are sloppy” - she’s literally pointing out to Rachel something to improve on. Sure, it’s not the nicest way but no one should be at a performing arts school and expecting nice.

Rachel’s disrespect of a teacher/professional continued for the whole time Cassandra July was on the show. She called her teacher out, was extremely rude and said “you’re jealous because we all have careers and yours is over”, so on so forth. I’m pretty sure if you were actually attending a drama school or performing arts academy, and you had the nerve to turn around and say that, you would be expelled and tossed on your ass before you could utter another word.

If a teacher says “I don’t think you’re ready to do the tango/for this part”, you should listen. They’ve been in the business for a LONG time, far longer than you have, and with loads more experience. The best you can do is listen and decide to study harder and better yourself. Rachel flatout ignored this advice and went ahead anyway because she wanted to be the Star NOW, no hard work or struggle or patience to be seen.

Let’s just say this; you don’t go to the dean of the uni/college and call one of the professors “a lunatic”.

Now Carmen Tibideaux:

For a start, Rachel choked her audition - it’s bizarre and ridiculous that she got in. She didn’t get in on her audition, but because she stalked and harassed Carmen until the dean gave in and came to watch her. In real life, if you fuck that audition up, that is it. You don’t get another chance until the following year when you apply again (and yes, it’s common to apply for drama schools multiple times until you get in - some people who go on to be successful actors have been known to audition as many as SEVEN times).

Realistically, Tibideaux should have not given Rachel that chance because she didn’t deserve it. No other candidate got that chance - in real life, no matter how talented an auditionee is, NO ONE is given more of a chance than anyone else. Everyone is judged on their audition, that’s it. Rachel may be talented but there are many others just as talented and even MORE so than her.

Also, Tibideaux could have in fact had a restraining order against Rachel. This crazy little girl turns up again and again like a complete twat, begging and pleading and just not understanding that she had her chance, she can have another chance NEXT year. I’d have seriously filed some kind of motion against Rachel, as I’m sure any other teacher or head would.

Despite the fact that Tibideaux gave Rachel chance after chance, Rachel was still rude and frankly ungrateful. Tibideaux makes valid points that Rachel is underperforming in EVERY single class. She’s not making an effort to be a part of the NYADA community.

If the dean of your college says that, you do NOT argue back. You do NOT attempt to say “I’m doing great, I’ve handled everything this school has thrown at me”. Rachel’s delusions of herself and her talent are laughable.

I could have applauded Carmen Tibideaux for turning around and telling Rachel how it is: “You are not the first supernova to come through here. You are talented, you have drive. What you don’t have, is you have no foundation. You don’t listen, and you don’t take direction. That’s why you need NYADA. You’re not ready.”

You can’t just expect to be fresh out of school or college and getting the fucking lead in hit Broadway shows. You start as ensemble, you learn, you work your way up. Rachel was too selfish and full of herself to do that. Also, the fact that she cannot listen to criticism or take direction screams that a director would NEVER hire her. She can’t take direction, and that will get her nowhere in her career. You have to listen, you have to collaborate and listen to everyone’s ideas as well as contributing your own.

The actual fucking nerve of a Rachel Berry saying “you’re wrong and I’m gonna prove it to you” - she would be out on her ass and never hired again, never accepted into an arts academy again. If someone older, wiser and more experienced tells you something, you LISTEN.

As an actor myself, we don’t do all of this hard work to be famous (at least, not those of us who actually love our work) - we go through student debt, years of no sleep, years of constant rehearsals, of being in the background waiting for our turn, of learning and honing and crafting our skills so that we can maybe one day do the thing we love most professionally. We actors/dancers/singers/performers are storytellers - we try to craft something meaningful or to tell a story we feel needs telling.

Carmen said something very true and on point: “do you care about the work or is it just about the spotlight?” Rachel never cared about the work - she never cared about being a storyteller or creating art. To her, it was all about the fame and attention.

Some other things:

After quitting, especially in the way she did, Rachel would definitely not be allowed to continue her studies where she left them at NYADA, if at all. At best, she would audition and get in the following academic year, and have to start from the bottom again. Most likely, however, she would not be allowed to study there again.

People in the industry talk. If Rachel was hard to work with when with even a few people, it would seriously damage her chances of being hired again. They would immediately throw away her resumé.

Even her choked audition was fucking irritating as a performer - if you screw up your lines or forget them or whatever, you don’t stop and ask to go again. You carry on. If you’re on Broadway and you get the words wrong, you cannot ask to start the song again in front of the entire audience. It’s extremely unprofessional. At school, when I did my guitar exams, that was KEY - “if you play the wrong note, do NOT go back and redo it - just keep going. You’ll get more points for carrying on than for doubling back”.

^So Rachel stopping and starting is immediately a no-no. At best, they would let her restart just once - but they would not let her have another chance. Even if she was given another chance and she aced it, the damage is done - she wouldn’t have gotten in.

Kurt aced his audition, didn’t mess up or stop, and didn’t harass the dean of NYADA to make sure he got in - Rachel messed up, stopped, harassed Carmen and was a brat. How the Hell did Rachel get into NYADA but not Kurt?? If Kurt didn’t get in, then Rachel DEFINITELY shouldn’t have, end of story.

In short, Rachel is the worst character and it actually pisses me off how inaccurately she’s written in regards to being at a performing arts academy/her success on Broadway. The writers wanted us to root for her so desperately but I would just skip the majority of scenes she was the focus of because she irritated me that much. If the writers wanted to make us root for her, they should have SHOWN her accepting that she had to start in the background and work her way up. They should have at least not let her get into NYADA.

[overthinkingkdrama]

Exit Review: My Country

Synopsis

This drama is set in the transition between the Goryeo and Joseon dynasties, and follows turbulent friendship turned fraught rivalry between Seo Hwi and Nam Seon Ho. Seo Hwi’s late father was the greatest swordsman of Goryeo, but after being framed for embezzling military supplies he was executed as a traitor, a stain which hangs over Hwi and his sister’s lives. Seon Ho is the illegitimate son of a powerful state official, but due to his mixed parentage he can never fully belong to his father’s world and has an insatiable ambition and bitter resentment toward his father which drives him.

Hwi and Seon Ho have been close since childhood, but when they end up going head to head in the state military exam a tragedy follows that will drive a terrible wedge between them. Eventually circumstances will force them to pick sides between General Yi Seong Gye (the first King of Joseon) an his ruthless son, Yi Bang Won, in the fight which will give shape and purpose to a newborn country.

Review

Story: My Country is a difficult drama for me to review objectively, in part because I loved it so much. Watching this drama was a truly absorbing and gripping experience for me, and it plays to so many of my story preferences. I was unequivocally obsessed with this drama from the premier to the finale, but during the weeks between airings I couldn’t help but feel like I was arm wrestling with the script.

It was characterization more than anything that gave me fits. I wouldn’t go so far as to accuse the show of giving us thin or two dimensional characters. To the contrary, each of these characters has a fully realized matrix of conflicting desires, loyalties and ambitions that inform their choices and alignments. However, it is often difficult to sift through those murky motivations and draw a clear line between a character’s internal desires and their external actions.

This drama starts out with an incredible cold open that raises all sort so questions about who these characters are and immediately invests you in finding out how they ended up in this situation. It’s truly masterfully done, and I probably rewatched it upwards of 10 times through the run. It kept me asking those questions all the way until the pay off. But because the writers were so invested in keeping their cards close to the chest, clear characterization was sometimes lost in the shuffle.

That said, this drama really is one beautiful, tragic escalation after another. Just taking the first two episodes in isolation is quite a ride. I really thought after the first few weeks, or hell, the first half, that the drama would get bogged down in plotting and politics or have nowhere left to go, but to my great joy it really doesn’t let up a single moment until the finale.

Acting: Where to even begin with the acting in this drama? All three of the main male leads: Yang Se Jong, Woo Do Hwan and the inimitable Jang Hyuk are perfectly cast and give inspired performances. Everything from posture to voice to subtle microexpressions is so stunningly on point.

I came into the drama already a big fan of both Woo Do Hwan and Jang Hyuk as actors, having followed them through other projects, so it wasn’t surprising to me that I liked them both here as well. However, what did surprise me was the extent to which they were able to show off their range and talent. As a long time Jang Hyuk fangirl, I would confidently argue that this particular rendition of the Yi Bang Won character is him at his absolute best. I also went into My Country relatively indifferent to Yang Se Jong, or at least not overly familiar with or impressed by his previous work. I’m happy to announce that that is no longer the case, as his performance of Hwi is one of the most memorable of the year for me, and his sheer level of commitment to the role is awe inspiring. There’s a video of him talking behind the scenes about a moment early on where he actually yelled himself hoarse embodying a moment of panic and grief, which made me appreciate the level thought and effort he put into playing this character.

I don’t want to limit my praise to just that trio of actors either, because the entire cast is incredible. I didn’t know much about Seolhyun before this role, but I thought she was really strong as well, though her character doesn’t feature as heavily as one might like or expect from the promotional material around this drama. The villains too are captivating, especially the detestable Nam Jeon played by veteran actor Ahn Nae Sang. Wow, you are really going to love to despise this guy. I just cannot say enough about the performances from top to bottom, because we would be here all day. The acting is really what makes the drama, especially the stunning chemistry between the characters, and more specifically the chemistry Yang Se Jong has with all the other leads.

Production: There is some movie quality cinematography throughout this drama. It just looks very, very good both in the way it is shot and the attention to detail, the props, the costumes the sets. There is a beautiful long tracking shot following Hwi through a battle field in episode 3 or 4 that was just jaw dropping. It really felt like they were flexing, honestly, and it’s refreshing to see this kind of cable quality coming out of South Korea and ending up on American Netflix for people to watch and appreciate.

I love the music in this drama. Some of it can come across a bit camp, like the electric guitar and strings heavy instrumental “My Country” that accompanies many of the sword fight scenes, but I loved Bang Won’s wailing violin theme music every time it showed up, and the OST definitely sets a mood.

One of the more distracting choices the drama made was to allude to certain historical characters like Poeun, Sambong and Choi Young but never have them actually appear as characters, in the present or in flashbacks, opting to address certain important events and philosophies through fictional expys such as Nam Jeon and Seo Geon instead. They even resort to filming certain scenes in strange oblique ways so that we understand Sambong is in the room but we don’t see his face.

The only thing I can figure is the writers wanted to use the audience’s familiarity with these historical figures without chaining the story too closely to the actual flow of historical events. Or perhaps they decided to exclude these characters in order to avoid too much direct comparison to the critically well-received and highly rated drama, Six Flying Dragons, which covers much of the same time period.

Feels: For me My Country watches like a bitter-sweet tragi-romantic melodrama centering on a toxic love triangle with a historical backdrop. And when I say “love triangle”, I am 100% referring to the interplay between Seon Ho, Hwi and Bang Won (my sincere apologies to poor Hui Jae) because that’s how the entire drama is structured. My Country is one of the most purely homoerotic things I’ve ever watched. If it weren’t for a few limp attempts to imply Seon Ho’s romantic interest was in Hui Jae and not his former friend, I would say “unapologetically homoerotic” but alas, South Korea isn’t quite there yet.

The romance between Hui Jae and Hwi never quite caught fire for me, though lord knows they were trying. It always felt like a side dish to the main course that the drama really wanted to serve: namely the star-crossed relationship of Hwi and Seon Ho. (And this is not meant as a dig toward those who liked the Hui Jae/Hwi romance. This section of the review is just about my subjective experience.)

There were moments where I worried, or couldn’t quite tell where the drama was taking us with regard to Seon Ho and Hwi, or where I feared everything was going to end in senseless destruction and they couldn’t successfully bring the plot to closure in just 16 episodes. But for the handful of issues I had with the writing of the drama, its final resolution was poetically, heart-wrenchingly, perfect.

My Country just pushes so many of my narrative and aesthetic buttons and plays heavily to my id. This is a drama that I’m going to be thinking about for a long, long time. I will definitely be watching it again and I will try to get as many other people to watch it as possible. I liked it that much.

Would I recommend My Country: The New Age? Yes, oh god yes. Please watch it. Watch it and then come talk to me about it. Definitely one of the best of the year.

9/10