#and by net i mean next
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i personally don’t resonate with scara/wanderer (my character type is usually himbos/golden retriever shaped) but i gotta say his story quest was very well done. it didn’t feel like a huge cop out which can happen with ‘redemption arcs.’ i also love the idea of memory and dream and that whole sub plot with the world tree. very nicely done.
i still think he’s a little shit, for sure. but well done on story telling. i’m pleased with the ending. it’ll be interesting to see him in the story as it progresses.
#( ( ooc#( ( tbd#just finished the quest finally#if you couldn't tell#i want to say the net archon#was the one who talked to us?#maybe?#im probably wrong#also ask to tag#spoilers#quest spoilers#anyway hope y'all are enjoying your lil stinker#and by net i mean next
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every time I hear someone say "oh you have to listen to Dear Evan Hansen it has such good mental health representation" I cry in Next to Normal
#next to normal#and yes this is based on a true story#generally I dont try to juck anyones jum so I of course didn't tell that person what I was thinking at that moment#and if someone found Dear Evan Hansen a useful text in terms of their own mental health journey who am I to discredit that#but this is the internet and I am back on the ntn train#in a way it is my saf autumn musical#and yes I am a survior of the 2017 Tony Awards why were you asking?#no but seriously#it is so interesting how many narrative devices Dear Evan Hansen took from Next to Normal#but turned them into a less complete piece#like Gabe in ntn is a representation of unadressed grief and trauma and the family has to accept that he will never be really gone#and connor is just...idk not fully thought out?#idk I'm rambling#but also#how the love story between Henry and Natalie means something#Natalie sees her parent's relationship and desperately doesn't want that for herself and Henry at the same time also stand for#a piece of normalcy that seems attainable#you don't sit there and think hu why is there this completely separate love story thrown in there?#it mirrors the problems#and dear evan hansen#do I even have to say it#I thnk the thing I resent it most for is that it has a love story#naja#I'm of listening to net to normal some more#sorry I someone who really likes deh stumbles accross this#I feel like espechially musicals can be something that can be so personal#and I don't actually want to contribute to more stuff like#ew why do you like this when theres xyz that is so much better or morally purer or whatever#I guess what I do want to say is: if I had a nickle for everytime they made a musical about mental health where theres a ghost on stage and#the sister of the dead kid falls in love with a funny guy while her family is falling apart
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HELP ok do i text him or not
#and by him i mean#this guy who i was really good friends with all of middle school and freshman year who i had a very bad friend break up with#who texted me a month ish ago and we talked for a little bit#and then he was asking me if i was into girls but in like a really weird rude way#so naturally i was weird and rude back#and we have not talked since that (which was like 2 weeks ago)#he thought i had a crush on the girl i sit next to in english (i did / do?) I DID NOT TELL HIM THAT#bc she’s sort of dating (“talking” and having sex) with my friends ex boyfriend#but he was just being weird#anyway i went to prom with said girl and i saw the guy i am contemplating texting#i feel bad for being mean to him and also i deleted his number and our conversation but i have his number memorized for some odd reason#my last english class is tomorrow and said girl will not be there bc she has a tennis match#so if i do text him what if he tries to talk to me bc my safety net isn’t there#OR should i talk to him in person tomorrow#no that’s a horrible idea#ok#help
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local man haunts (me) open practise yet again more news at 11
#txt#what an experience#i didnt go alone this time which means shenanigans heightened by 20#and by that i mean we were by the glass drinking mate (that security thankfully let us bring in)#and ___ kept going (lifts mate up to the glass) quieres? to all the players that skated by#and i had to just go STOP THAT#and they went they dont want our mate hmph what do they know about mate and i went. well thats the thing. they dont 😭😭#theres was a bunch of kids next to me which meant a lot players over to our side and ekky trucked over#and knocked the glass w his stick on a driveby and scared the shit out of me I ALMOST DROPPED MY MATE he had this shit eating grin#maffhew also kept doing little toodle-loo waves at the kids behind him it was so cute 😭😭😭#but anyways i think its so funny ___ kept focusing on ekky too and i didnt realise why until they just drop the bombshell of#“they remind me of your brother” and i went “DONT FUCKING SAY THAT WHAT THE FUCK MAN DONT SAY SUCH SACRILEGE”#the rest of the convo was in spanish and i dont know how to like fully convey 🇦🇷 banter in eng but it roughly went#“no he does. he has the same dumb face when he starts shit (because he kept bodily bumping into boqy and forsy)#the same 'was that me? did i do that?' troublemaker face. hes a shit stirrer but never answers to it. hes sleazy in that way.#he has the same beard too dont you see it“#and then i promptly spent the whole time going god he is just like my older brother oh this is a horrifying revelation oh god#anyways they kept saying look at his dumb face look at it just like your brother the whole time in spanish when he crept near#and i had to go SHUT UP PLEASE HE CAN HEAR YOU to which they snorted and went you said its fine if we spoke spanish here theyre not gonna#understand us and i was like OKAY BUT IM SURE 11 YEARS HERE HES GONNA PICK UP#SOMETHING AND WE KEEP CURSING SO FOR MY SAKE CAN YOU SHUT UP#mikksy and schmidty were super playful with eo. tuomo ruutu kept messing w mikksy. and ekky was like a damn bumper car bumpin everyone#maffhew ofc was very dramatic when he couldnt get a goal in against knighter and he did the horse headshake in front of us#and i went “you can tell whos number 19 because hes the most dramatic person on the ice always”#ekky was super vocal i know he wanted to practise against the empty net but aj was practising tipins and he goes#MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. and aj so confused just moves like ???#and ekky notches one in goes over to him and waves his glove at him to move#also dmen + lundy were practising on my side of the ice afterwards (lundy ekky uvis kuli. kuli was practising solo. lundy was feeding ekky#for some slapshots uvis got some passes in with them) and anyways i did not fucking realise swaggy was still out because i was so focused on#the dmen until he shot a puck straight at my face and like man i know its not personal but damn did it feel personal with the lookback
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#does the return of color mean I'm feeling better? not exactly!#but like yknow. whatever. we soldier on. the end is in sight. (in theory.)#our other partner will be here next weekend#then at the end of next month they'll come down again to drive me and the cat home#then my wife will finish the rest of the moving process the following month#and we will all be home together starting in july.#(and I won't be the safety net anymore starting in june.)
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not to be another donations post but you may remember how over the summer we had massive amounts of plumbing problems and other unexpected moving costs? well. after proceeding to work every single hour available to me for six months, take no holidays whatsoever, and budget the hell out of every aspect of my life, I was actually on track to pay everything back and maybe have a little bit of wiggle room by the time summer came around!
and then we got a call from the vet about routine labs saying that if we didn't take Suzy in to an emergency specialty hospital immediately, she would die within in a week, she might die anyways if we took her there, but it was our only chance to have a few more months with her. after an extremely difficult household discussion, we decided that we needed to do as much as we could for her. she's been a beloved member of the family for 18 years. we were not going to abandon her in her hour of need.
with two days at the specialty hospital, the prognosis was better than we could have possibly hoped! the most important thing is she does not have heart problems at all, which means that we can treat her chronic kidney disease with normal IV fluids and with careful treatment she could easily be with us for years to come. the timely intervention also may or may not have saved her from acute kidney failure too, we'll know when we go back to the vet on Wednesday to get her blood checked where her levels have stabilized at.
two days at the specialty hospital means we are also down $3652 , and no longer are on track to pay back everything by July when it comes due unless a couple of uncertain things going forward Go Right, I do not trust everything to Go Right, and we're also still uncertain about what long-term treatment going forward is going to cost.
I still have my ko-fi and my patreon, but honestly, I'm aware that everything is tight for everyone always and there are also a lot of causes that need money right now and in the face of that "hey my family went super out on a limb to try to save our cat and would love some help not falling off" feels kind of shallow. but like. not to sound dumb or like a youtuber or podcaster, but, like. honestly I think the Most Helpful Thing that anyone could do for me right now is take a fucking HelloFresh link that will send you a "free" box for cost-of-shipping ($7ish?) if you Sign Up For An Account that you can then cancel Immediately After The Box Has Shipped and Never Give Them Any More Money Than That and get Six To Ten Meals Out Of It, and for getting someone to "sign up", they will give me a free box too. like. if 13 people are willing to take a link then I don't need to worry about food for the next three months. which would be. HUGE.
so I guess.... dm me if you want a link? otherwise expect to see a lot of promotion of my writing/ patreon as I scramble the hell to try to make this money up
#my life#pet sick for tw#donation post#sort of#yes I am aware that Hello Fresh is problematique / union-busting#they are also currently the only easily accessible source of Free Food that we can actually eat/use#honestly if anyone Wants To Help but doesn't really have the $7 for shipping#I will freaking venmo you back the $7 after I get confirmation of account credit#sending someone $7 for $60 of groceries still means you have Gifted Our Household with net $50 of food#at no cost to yourself#I'm not in As Shitty of a place as last summer bc my mother is also deeply emotionally attached to Suzy#and has agreed to spot us in July for a bit of the money if we pay her back in September#it's just!!!! really FUCKING frustrating!!!!!! we had the money saved!!!! I have spent the last six months KILLING myself to have the money#and now we are back to nearly square 1 except with six months instead of twelve months to make up the difference#so. free food would be much appreciated. as that would also mean that no matter what bullshit the next few months throws at us we at least#know that there will be weekly groceries shipped to us#me @ my job give me overtime hours#legit might destroy me again to work a 240hr month a month or two in a row#but three months of THAT would put me in the clear and they've got free coffee and energy drinks at work#however in lieu of my job giving me the ability to Not Practice The Best Self Care in return for Ungodly Amounts Of Money#'hi friends and mutuals can I interest you in a HelloFresh box' is the best I can do#I swear I will never start a youtube channel or start podcasting tho
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får jag lov?
#it means may i (have this dance) :]#i just wanted to draw them in these outfits again but i gave skagen something more to wear instead of just. a net HDJKSGHSJ#i dont think either of them are very good at dancing but they enjoy it#skagen is built like a twig next to lovart heehee#jjba oc#skagen gipp#lovart sjöberg#ancient hook au#corps.oc#corps.art#reference for this pose was uuhhh idk some random cute 1920s dance poster or something idk i liked the pose so .
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sometimes i rec fics and i get nervous because what if someone leaves a nasty comment after finding it through me??? So i wanna be so clear that if i ever find out you* leave mean comments on ao3 i am blocking you*.
*general non specific you. this hasnt happened yet im not vague posting im just setting a hard boundary here.
#Not concrit that someone asked for#not gentle explanations for why something is a racist trope the author seems to be unaware of#not anything like that#i mean harassment or mocking#if you cannot say something nice then remember the comment button is an OPT IN feature and you can simply choose not to do that#forever remember that one fic where i left a long comment gushing about how much i loved it#only for the next chapter to include child murder framed as a net positive#glad i left that comment!! equally glad the back button exists!!!!
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who give a shit about tayIor swift
#liz blogs#i saw an instagram post from someone like 'why is everyone who doesnt like taylor swift like mean and boring and sexist' like what . huh#she's just another mid celebrity i literally don't get why she's miles more popular than the next famous blonde_woman.mdl in hollywood#i'm not even being a Hater(tm) i literally . don't get it. i'm sorry. she made like two catchy songs in 2010. is that her whole Thing#'mid' isn't even being a hater it just means like. moderate. neither good nor bad. Middle.#are you guys ok does she have some kind of siren or mind control power#i am immune to whatever she does to people. i don't hate her but i don't really like her either she simply just Exists to me. she is Mid!#i've heard her music! i have no idea what's different about her that nets her this kind of insane rabid fanbase. i am lost#i spelled her first name with an i instead of an L lest her fans act like i just called her a slur and threatened her actual life#instead of just saying i don't get what the big deal is and she's not really any more or less special or talented than the next artist#you'll hear on the radio#anyway this post has been brought to you by 'why tf is she on the explore page'
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#kori i understand your thought process#it's the same as emptying the net#but if you don't fix it#and by that i mean play the whole team and win the next 3#you're going to lose coach of the year to CK#and i do hope you are seeing all the twitter comments and by that i mean the handful of reporters who are talking about this choice#at the end of the day the first goal last night was an unlucky bounce#[note i still take issue with certain people dumping the puck for no reason]#but it's happened to ambrose and murphy before too i think#the thought process is that if we can only score one goal per game#we better not allow more than one#but honestly i think it's difficult to break a tie in regulation if you aren't being strategic#and i think montreal has a real problem of not taking strategic shots#especially when they are down or not scoring they shoot from distance#which is not the right move#it's something you do when you are desperate#what you need to do is put shots on net collect rebounds and force the goalie to be in 2 places at once#see the poulin daoust goal from the 3-1 boston game#also practice even strength goals PLEASE#i will say one last tangentially related thing: i think the jaques tapanni trade is what helped boston and hurt min#and by that i don't mean that jaques isn't doing well but it's clear that min needed the offensive depth and face-off#expertise that tapanni brought#and i know heise's injury kind of coincided with that as well#but to me it's clear that shifted the momentum#quite frankly it's not a surprise that this is coming up#because the same thing happened with the shootouts#do you know why we lost every single shootout#it's bc kori kept it so top heavy#and i have to wonder if the [starters] are just taking this on the chin or#like as leadership you have a responsibility to the members of your team not just the standing of your team you know
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Had a bad day at work today ... x__x...
#Atleast I'm home now but ........ ×_× ...#Back at it again tomorrow ... and don't have a day off until next Friday... ughhhh#The long long hours are what's grinding the shit out of my psyche#I think I've worked about 90 hours without a break day insofar. My heads so fucked#I'm set to work like another 60 hours until I get a day off so like.. almost 150hrs without a day off.#It hurts a lot. I wish I could confidently get another job that doesn't suck shit like these hours do#I don't even know what that'd look like without being underpaid. My job is technically easy#It just hurts my head to have to do it for so long#It feels like either 'get paid a lot to do stupid bullshit for a lot of hours' or 'get underpaid to do less stupid bullshit for less time'#And sometimes the less stupid bullshit is harder work. Yknow what I mean#Like I'd care about it more depending on what it is. But sometimes it's even harder than what I'm doing now#I don't know though. But if I never try ill never know#But it's also like. That's a big leap to take for someone who doesn't have a safety net out here#And my problem is... I don't even know where I'd go to have that safety net.#I don't think it exists for me anymore. When I went homeless it got better and I wouldn't change it#But it also means building back everything I lost. It sometimes feels impossible even though it isnt#But .... God. I wish I just had a place I could trust fall like I want to and feel OK with if it falls through#Like I'm not going to go homeless again sorta way. Like my cats have a place to live.#I don't know what I'd do if I lost the ability to house my animals. I'd be so fucked
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Beginning to really wonder how much of my financial concern is manufactured and handed to me as opposed to something I'm genuinely concerned by
#bc like. i'm getting by just fine. i don't have anything to be reasonably worried about#but also when i was a kid my father would break down my mother's paycheck and basically explain how broke we were#and that May Have Affected Me Somewhat#as well as just. the way you consistently see the advice to just save! don't get takeout! necessities! and i'm not intent on living like#a monk nor am i intent on being on that grindset for financial gain#it's like i don't intrinsically care but i have so many messages given to me about how i need to care a lot and it puts me in a weird spot#i am simultaneously standing still and moving at mach speeds#i mean right now i just need a safety net while in between jobs; after that i need to save up to move out of state bc the uh#political situation and upcoming presidential election don't seem very sustainable for someone like me anymore#they weren't to begin with but i don't wanna stick around to see how bad it's gonna get#but it's like. okay and then what? save for what? going back to school i guess? idk#i feel like i keep asking myself what i'm trying to accomplish and keep trying to force myself to have answers#here and now when i have to be okay with taking things one step at a time instead of having everything here and now#it's simultaneously fine and terrible and i am holding two conflicting yet equal truths#i feel i may have a clearer head once i leave my current job. i'm trying to look but nothing feels appealing given how#burnt out i already feel. i dread going back into my workplace and i fear it's showing to the patients and i don't want that#i want a month off to rediscover who i am as a person outside of getting yelled at in retail and then pick something back up#could be feasible. genuinely could be. i need to sort out the health insurance aspect but. that's lowkey the plan?#to construct a financial safety net and then slam on the breaks for a while; see if i can strike up a deal with the staff about me#coming in for specific tasks bc we already know i'm quick and efficient with the inventory so i do have a little leverage#you know what. this is getting some of it off my chest and i'm starting to feel confident again lmao#i won't be doing weekends starting either next week or the week after so that's a start! i just think i want everything done right now#bc i'm afraid i won't have the chance again but i will. i definitely will#i just need to let myself get to that point; it's just the immense drain from the register work and the Everything that comes with retail#also having to accept that it's okay to leave this; there's not something wrong with me like. ''not being able to handle it'' or w/e#no mindfulness or detachment could've saved me; it was shit and i'm hitting the bricks and that's all there is to it#i've been thinking a lot about it all lately bc it's what's most prominent in my life rn of course#idk. pondering. introspecting. as i am wont to do#anyways if you've read all this you're a real mvp and i am kissing you on the hand#shai speaks
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The aesops fables filet lace patterns. One of these days.
#I mean I could probably manage one of em like now that I sort of know what I’m doing I very much could make one#I’d like to find a better way to make sure the nets gonna keep its shape first though!! maybe like startch or block it or something? I’ll tr#TRY (ignore the typo on mobile) next time along with the darning stitch and then we’ll jump over to something more complicated#I do genuinely think I could manage it’s really not that hard now that we’ve gotten the ball rolling you know#tacit rambles: fiber arts
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I do not mean to rush you AT ALL
BUT
IM DYIIIIIIIINNNNNGGGGGGGG for the continuation (is that an English word???) of the fake dating au
I’ll have you know that I WILL contact authorities!!! (mostly to contain myself to be honest)
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH anon consider this my official love declaration, kskdjdndbdjd, this made me laugh so much 🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️❤️ i genuinely adore you for this omfg. YOU ARE THE SWEETEST and your excitement is making me excited now tooooo <3333
also. before you do call 999 - i actually do have a bit of good news for you re: the next chapter 😘 thanks to my bestie @redyellowstupid's lovingly aggressive intervention ("YOU CANNOT LEAVE THE POOR PEOPLE WAITING UNTIL 2023 FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER KATIE WTF") we will most likely be having the next chapter tonight. the good old "sunday at approx. 11pm UK time" except this time it'll have to be "sunday at approx. 11pm South African time" because that's where i currently am lmao.
anyways yes, the point is: chapter 6 will be out tonight, hopefully. almost certainly in fact. i just need to tidy up the worst of my 2am-typos (and have a quiet lament that i STILL haven't reached the plot point i planned this whole chapter around akhshdgdjsgdhdgdg) but then approx. 7k of competitive idiots piarles will be all yours ❤️
and again for good measure: I LOVE YOU ANON ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😘😘😘
#asks & answers#anon#wip: love's a game#fake dating au updates <3#ksmsnbdjdhfnfbfbf all fake dating readers please send jaylin flowers#she is a bully but she's also RIGHT#i can't very well leave you all until 2023 for the next chapter#i mean we are 21k in (soon to be 28k) and they STILL HAVEN'T KISSED#wtf is wrong with me#wtf#ALSO#dear anon ❤️ you made my day when you sent this omfg. MADE IT. all the way.#btw continuation IS an english word#i think anyway lmfao#the second someone asks me this all my english suddenly leaves me#'nee tannie my brein is maar net simpel baie jammer daaroor' 🥲🥲🥲#anyway anyway anyway#LOVE YOU ANON ❤️❤️ tysm for this#MWAH
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hmmm
maybe i need to not do this tonight after all
#speculation nation#discacc shit#i am. just stressing myself out with this pressure lol#+ with minimal encouragement atm im just running myself in circles#trying desperately to finish writing. and i am soooo close#but i can just imagine how this will turn out#i push myself too hard to finish this chapter tonight. which it WOULD take a real push to finish it tonight.#bc im officially at 16k words for this chapter. and i am not even done writing.#i stay up far too late to edit. bc that is a Lot of words to edit.#i end up sleep deprived. it's a long chapter so people wont even be able to read it quickly#i can barely sleep anyways bc im too busy waking up every hour to check to see if there are any comments (which there likely wont be.#or at least will be minimal comments. bc as i said it is a long chapter. people cant make it through it quickly)#then i crash tomorrow bc i didnt get the engagement i worked so hard for as quickly as i wanted it#im still without a beta reader bc andi is recovering which means i dont have the safety net / reassurance that beta reading provided me#and ultimately i end up in a shit state tomorrow. unable to even jump into my next bit of writing as ive pressured myself to do.#i can see it fully laid out before me bc this is EXACTLY what has happened the last few chapters. last chapter especially.#i did end up getting pretty good engagement on the last chapter. but it took time. & by then i'd already had an entire crash over it#as much as i want to finish this b4 the 21st i really need to be mindful with myself#i am doing no one any favors by rushing it. least of all myself.#really if youve read this far + youre a discacc reader. i would rly appreciate if u could send me some kind of encouragement#even as little as liking this post would help. tho a reply/ask would b more effective lol#im currently stuck in the sink hole of 'no one cares' so. it'd help to have that proven wrong.#is it annoying that i have no fucking object permanence w/ knowing ppl care about my writing? Absolutely!#but idk im just trying to do my best with a shit brain. any bit of help/reassurance would be appreciated
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lmao the neo clone I played over a year ago that had a toxic discord server, bot scandals, and a completely wrecked economy from day 1 has a writeup on r/hobbydrama now
#it got even worse somehow#I stopped playing once I found the 2nd bc the 1st's atmosphere sucked hard#comparing that and the one I play now is actually a fascinating study bc tl;dr the first had basically no features on launch#the main way to make NP was a very limited amount of dailies which. obviously. could only be done once a day. and you may not even win from#the next best method was restocking morphing potions. but only if you were quick enough/had the money to buy it in the first place#and the profit relied on it being a pet people would actually want#so you could easily lose money buy impulsing an unpopular species/colour combo potion you could never resell to anyone#popular combos were obviously snatched up quicker#and when I snatched I mean “all but confirmed rumours of a select few users making restocking script bots”#people had nothing to do and got bored so naturally they started fighting#that wasn't actually very tl;dr but you get the idea lmao#reminder: day ONE#the second site: added 10 daily jobs to do from the start for common restockable/junk items which could net you about 100k easy.#people actually made spreadsheets of the job items and set up shops of them in bulk for people to buy at a fair price#also a simple-if-tedious card game that pays out a cap of 50k and only costs 50np a round#you have more pet slots instead of neo's traditional 4#which meant people could now dedicate spaces to more “unpopular” pets they'd never considered before instead of picking and choosing#(for instance I have a royalgirl buzz! never really bothered with buzzes before then)#so more morphing potions get sold
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