#and an exam to work on for September which is really really cool!
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jackyjackdraws · 1 year ago
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I know I draw these two sleeping a lot but the poly relationship between them and sleep is one of my favorite OTP'S
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girlthativealwaysbeen · 2 months ago
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it would feel so nice to work towards a career that has meaningful impact and makes millions of people happy
#i follow this person cleo abrams on youtube and she's always talking so excitedly about scientists#and their amazing discoveries cool facts and she's so excited and starry eyed and hopeful#she genuinely just wants to educate people and has so much hope that we can make the world a better place#also like idk maybe unrelated but i saw the mv of new romantics and just. wow#say what you will about her but there's no doubt she's made an insane number of people happy SO HAPPY that they're crying#so many tours#idk i want#i wish my life was bigger#i feel so isolated and always just focusing on myself my career my health my enjoyment#what about everything everyone else#i keep trying to be completely okay with being alone i keep telling myself to not need anyone and be 100% independent#find happiness within hobbies interests#but it feels like a losing battle#i don't know i just. miss everyone 😭😭😭😭#but it hurts too much tbh always more sad than happy always more crying than laughing#i miss my bestfriend i don't know what i did wrong but she won't pick up my call she keeps saying she's busy#i don't want to be clingy because she hates that shit i don't want to drive her away but she's my only friend#i miss my fucking mom she doesn't care if i live or die obviously but i miss just having her presence in the house#and even tho my sister is here she's never fully present always on her laptop working#i wouldn't really say i miss my dad but wow it's been so long since mom and dad stayed together at home it was almost#always miserable but sometimes at the lunch table it was nice#i don't know everything and everyone is moving and changing so fast and i can't breathe under it and it's already september#but this entire year felt like a blur it's like everyone who left took a chunk of my heart with them#and i should be happy because im so close to the exam which will get me out of this house finally be financially independent#like i wanted since i was 11 i could finally start my life#but it all feels so. i don't know the whole future seems black like i can't imagine life past november 2025#how do you imagine happiness if you've never been happy?#and all these feelings are making it so hard to study and studying is so fucking important because if i don't ill be stuck here forever#and i don't want to go thru attempts fail and pass again atleast back then i had a reason first heartbreak‚ not getting to go to college#but what now why now i don't even understand i know objectively i do not have it that bad it's literally better even if i compare to my own
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inkofamethyst · 2 months ago
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September 8, 2024
It's been a minute.
In brief: first week was good; finished my hair in three days and it's alright; worked deep into nights to finish the costume; ren faire was amazing!
First Week: I'm getting the feeling that I will have a decent amount of downtime to dedicate to my research and improving my lab skills this semester compared to last year. I was stressed about several things, but they turned out alright in the end. One thing was the primate class I'm taking. I don't have much primate behavioral background, but this class seems like it will mostly just be reading and discussion, so a super super chill seminar (no papers or exams, either!!). I was also worried about the new responsibilities that are lumped onto second years, but they seem manageable, especially with such a "large" cohort.
Hair: they're essentially mini twists with extensions, so I generally like the look of them, but I think the extension quality is lacking. It did take me two additional evenings to finish, but they should be good for at least another two or three weeks. Next time, I may try marley hair.
Costume: I was in the library makerspace for five hours last week to do the main machine-sewing bits. It would've been six but a friend had a last-minute birthday gathering which I forfeited my makerspace reservation to attend (I don't regret that choice, though!). While I couldn't finish everything exactly as I'd hoped to (the bottom hems on the chemise are raw (but I cut/tore them straight across so I wasn't too worried), not enough time to add the ruffle to the chemise (and I wasted like an hour at the machine prepping it before realizing that I still needed to work on the bodice), no "boning" in the bodice (which ultimately was probably for the best, as the canvas interlining was HEFTY (potentially too hefty considering the event lol)), ran out of lining fabric for the bodice so the back pieces are unlined (I was using scrap to begin with, and I'll likely go in and use scraps from the chemise just to cover those back seams)), it still managed to look REALLY COOL. I am SO PROUD of what I managed to accomplish in just a week. GAH I felt so pretty. Even despite all the incomplete bits and things I would change. Every time I looked into a mirror yesterday I would just beam at myself because I felt so good!!! I managed to complete all of my goals (chemise, bodice/corset, skirt hike) to a passable degree, and it brings me so much joy to think about. I did that!!!
Ren Faire: The faire was so good. Plenty of activities, plenty of shops, plenty to see, plenty to eat. My dnd group plus my turquoise-friend were all there for a birthday celebration, and it was a grand time. I got to try archery, I failed to eat a turkey leg by myself, I yelled my throat raw cheering for my assigned (and particularly bloodthirsty) old man knight during the jousts, I tried (and loved) raspberry mead. While my turquoise-friend and I hunted for elf ears that'd match out skin tone, we couldn't find any and instead each bought some gorgeous filigree elven ear cuffs. I adore mine and want to wear them everywhere omg. It was all-around just so great, and I totally want to go back next year.
As I was roaming the faire, it became clear that my outfit wasn't really anything special at a glance. Bodice, chemise, skirt, belt. While, yes, that was my goal, I did take some time to reflect on whether hours of designing, drafting, basting, machine sewing, and hand sewing were worth it to look almost exactly like every other bar maiden/tavern wench who bought a costume from amazon or spirit halloween. I think the answer is that it was worth it, even if the costume wouldn't pass a true seamstress' close inspection. There are absolutely elements to mine that are unlikely to be found in mass-produced versions, even ones that "look cooler". Certain seam finishes, the amount of fabric used (esp in the skirt omg), specific time-intensive design elements, even if they look simple (the sleeves are based on Jester's and are my favorite part of the whole outfit). Plus, I have something I made! That I'm proud of! That I enjoy wearing! The design process was fun, far more fun than scrolling through etsy or something. So, yeah, it's not about the complements. It's way more about the feeling I get while wearing it and how that impacts my faire experience.
For next year, I'm going to try to add elements to the outfit that give it more character, sort of like environmental storytelling, but with accessories on the body.. Will I be a tavern wench who moonlights as a royal assassin? Will I be an herbalist's apprentice who works at an apothecary and is hoping to finally brew a love potion, or perhaps a budding necromancer longing to bring their loved one back? A floral fairy who's been transformed to human size, or a bloodthirsty berserker queen? (The Renaissance Faire maybe isn't the best place to try out these ideas, as it's heavier on the historical side of historical fantasy, but maybe what I need is a larp that's heavier on the fantasy side.)
Today I'm thankful that last week was a good week! I'm thankful that my classes seem okay and that I managed to finish my costume (mostly) and that I had a lot of fun at the faire! I'm also thankful my turquoise-friend was with me at the faire. This will absolutely be a fantastic grad school memory.
Also special shoutout to the nyx eye pencil in icy blue (or something like that). I went low makeup yesterday but randomly picked that up the day before to help my eyes match the blue elements in the costume, and it stayed on all day. Impressive for a budget item.
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khaleesiofalicante · 1 year ago
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THE EVIL HAS BEEN DEFEATED! And by that I mean exams are finally over! And the last one on Monday, which was the most difficult one probably went good so I'm even more excited for summer vacation to start. And September is gonna be hell, so I'm planning on fully enjoying this summer😄
And of course, first thing I did was read the chapter you posted and I absolutely loved it! I have so many thoughts that I will share in another ask
I also finished the fourth season of Drive To Survive. Which I will talk about in another ask because it will be longgggg. But I absolutely loved the Canadian GP, I mean a podium with Verstappen, Alonso and Hamilton, that had to be legendary! And he looked so happy after it ended I wanted to hug him🥹 Also Hamilton saying it was an honour to be on the podium with two World Champions when he has more titles than both of them combined, I really love this man. What did you think of the race? Also, opinions on Russel trying to convince the team to allow him to pass Hamilton in the Monaco GP? I mean I really like George but that kinda pissed me off.
On other news I watched the Good place and Good omens and they're both amazing shows I really enjoyed them. Have you seen them? You should see them if you haven't they're awesome!
How are you?? How did you copy with the hell that was May? I really hope June has been better for you and you enjoyed your vacation. And what is this about you getting your hair died blue?? THEY MUST LOOK AWESOME, not ordinary colour on hair always looks great. My best friend once died half her hair pink and they looked amazingg
Can't wait to hear how you've been while I'm done bombarding you with asks about FMF and F1. 🌷
PS: I've told a couple friends of mine that I've started watching F1 and they legit didn't believe me and I honestly can't blame them, the power of Max Hamilton🥲
VICKYYYYY HELLO.
congratulations on surviving hell and hope you have the BEST time during your summer vacay!!!
I was so glad to see him on the podium too (although in all honesty i was half dead during the Candian GP because it was late here) but Merc upgrades are really working and here is hoping he can get more podiums (maybe even p1!!!) in one of the upcoming races <3333
I'm not a big fan of Russell so yeah it really annoys me when he says shit like that on the team radio kjdnjkds.
I have watched both good place and the good omens - the former is one of my favorite shows because it's so fucking smart and effortlessly funny.
I survived the hell that was May and really learned many life lessons. i feel like i went through an apocalypse or something but tis all over now. And I did dye my hair blue and I've been told it's very cool so yay no regrets lol.
PS - The power of Hamilton is truly unmatched. Can't wait for the Austrian GP and omg it would be hilarious if Redbull doesn't win there because it's their home race ;)
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aletheapierce · 2 years ago
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september 23rd 2022: campus time capsule submission
it seemed so silly. a time capsule? in this climate? with everything going on not just at ogden but in the world? aleteha didn’t really see the point of it, but still, she decided to bite. moving to set up their phone on their desk, alethea hit record before sitting back. she stared at her reflection, moving her hair from behind her shoulders to cover them, shifting to find the perfect light, anything to distort the face staring at her. it never seemed enough. 
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she had thought about just sending a video of a solo, her own rendition of myrtha, or giselle, but figured this would surely be less embarrassing than some silly little dance.
“uhm, hello.” they smiled with a small wave, visibly uncomfortable in front of the camera. “my name is alethea. the name for ‘truth’ in ancient greek which...” she let her words fade out, nothing really felt like truth. not now, not ever really. nice one mom. “i guess it’s time to live into that namesake isn’t it?” the words dripped out slowly, sadly, and she caught herself. she could edit all of this out as she bit her lip and glanced away before clearing her throat, placing the mask on that she had been trained into her whole life. sit pretty, smile wide, nod frequently, be engaged. it was exhausting, but it worked.
“hi ogden! my name is alethea, which means ‘truth’ in ancient greek. but that’s beside the point. i’m supposed to tell you a bit about life 50 years ago i suppose?” she shrugged, offering a kind smile as she tried to shoulder on. “uh, i’m not sure what life is like these days for you. but now it’s...hard. and easy. this weird dynamic of watching the world on the brink of falling apart, and having so much going on in your own life and like...you still have to take exams. and you still live down the halls from really cool and amazing people and...” how was she to explain the world as it was? to explain ogden? “not sure if you’re looking advice, though i’m certainly not the person to take it from. or if you’re looking for a sneak peak into the average day of an ogden student which...i may not be qualified for either.” her lips twisted in a curious and goofy sort of smile as she shrugged. why would ogden want to remember now? 
“but i suppose i’ll say three things about life right now. maybe it’s advice, maybe it’s a memory for your parents and grandparents.” her hands moved from her lap to rest on the desk now as she stared at the camera. “one, everyone you encounter has so much more going on under the surface. be careful, be kind, and maybe spend some time exploring what’s there. then maybe they won’t surprise you in ugly ways.” now her left hand wrapped around her pointer finger as she counted everything off. “two, ogden is just a school at the end of the day. don’t let it break your soul or command who you are.” if only she could follow that advice. “and three, there is probably few chances in your life to discover who you are, and this place can be one of them. do it. without fear. follow your own desires, skip class, go out with friends, i don’t know just...be a person. even if ogden doesn’t want you to be, even if others don’t like it.” god if only she could do just that, just get out of their head long enough to breathe. with a now shaking voice, alethea offered another smile, this one significantly less vibrant than the first. “oh! and uh, continue to invest in the environment. i hope you all have it much more figured out than we do.” with a light giggle she reached forward to end the recording.
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their smile faded as they sat back, arms now crossed tightly over their chest as they gazed away from the camera. what could they offer in fifty years when they couldn’t offer much of anything now? but by this time tomorrow they would have edited the video and submitted it just as they would have been told, sewing yet another false alethea to be remembered. 
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spaciousreasoning · 4 months ago
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A Normal Weekend
I had to get up early Friday morning for my home visit eye exam. The gentleman showed up at 8:30 a.m. and proceeded to take pictures of my eyeballs with a little contraption. He said the results looked pretty good, but he would pass them on to our primary care for further inspection. If there’s more to report, I guess we’ll find out come September, when we finally get in to see our new medical professionals in person.
We did not leave the house on Saturday. We just sat around doing routine stuff for the day. It was 90-plus degrees, so staying in the cool was a good idea.
We did find a new show to watch, “HPI: Haut Potentiel Intellectuel.” A French production available on Hulu, it’s about a woman—and single mom—with an IQ of 160 who works as a cleaner and winds up helping police solve crimes.
I ran across a trailer for it on YouTube. Just a couple rows down was also a trailer for the American version of the same show which will appear this fall on ABC, starring Kaitlin Olson. It will likely appear on Hulu as well.
The first episode was quite enjoyable, so we look forward to seeing the rest of the French production (24 total episodes) as well as what the American production winds up looking like.
We got up and went to church on the Ninth Sunday after Pentecost. Once again the rector did an excellent job of wading through some strange scripture lessons and coming up with a good homily.
After the service and a little bit of visiting with some of the other parishioners, we stopped off at Albertson’s on the way home to do a little grocery shopping. It included some more wine for Nancy and some salad fixings, more cold brew and another item or two.
We hung out for the rest of the afternoon not doing much. That did include a nap, which isn’t really doing anything but resting.
Then I left for the Sunday recovery meeting early in order to stop by Costco and fill the tank with gas. Still $3.46 per gallon, and there was no waiting in the self-service lanes. After the meeting, dinner was waiting when I got home. Nancy had made a salad, heated up the leftover marinara sauce, boiled pasta, and made garlic toast.
Before I got home, Nancy had done a little rearranging. She moved the tall shelf from the kitchen into the cat study to hold her art supplies and switched a small shelf from the living room to the kitchen, next to the table. She moved another small table from next to the living room bookshelf to the corner where the small shelf had been. Then she switched a couple of lamps. Settling in continues.
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reverlybios · 1 year ago
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September 4, 2023.
So this is my first post back on here…I need an outlet and a release from everything. My mental health is well shit like unfortunately most Americans.
A little about me, I’m a single mom of a 4 year old boy (no, I’m not okay), I am a true Libra born on October 2,1997, so I’m 25 years old. Currently I work as a Ophthalmic Technician at a specialty eye surgery center,but I I am also studying for my real estate license.
Recently I just made a huge transition in my life to move from Florida to New York. When coming to this decision I really didn’t have many options and a lot of people don’t actually know why I ended up moving. At the time I was living with my son in a nice house, in a nice neighborhood in the suburbs and working full time, going to school for nursing full time and obviously being a full time single parent. My son started acting out in school and he ended up getting kicked out of school, so I panicked but I found him a new school and he started there and shortly after he was suspended from that school for similar behavior as the last school….once again as I single parent confused and not really knowing what to do and with no one to really turn to for help and advice..I had to miss work and school and important exams that unfortunately I could not make up. I quickly gave up on school to tend to my child and within the week of him getting suspended and with no child care I had reached out to my one main support system, which was my sons dads mom(my sons grandma).
My sons Grandma had recently moved from Florida back to her home town in Upstate New York and was really no longer around to help. Although we did talk on the phone and what not it wasn’t the same as being in the same state obviously.
She told me that maybe it would be best for my son and I to come to New York and just relocate. I hesitated on this idea. I thought maybe he could go visit his grandma while I figure out another school situation for him to come back to.
Side note: My family and parents live in Florida but were not helpful in any of this really.
After thinking about my situation….I decided to send my son to New York with his grandma while I packed up everything in Florida and moved myself. THIS WAS NOT EASY. But I knew I needed help and support from at least one person who could, would and actually WANTED to be there for my son and I. My son left that weekend and saying goodbye to him was the hardest moment of my life. His grandma flew down to Florida picked him up and then they both flew back to New York.
Two months…It took me two months to find a job, a place to live and pack up an entire house by myself…(Which I did) Not only that but I was moving to a state I had never even been to before which was so intimidating in itself… but it was for my son… for him to have family around and so I could have support to thrive and take a bit of pressure off of m in general.
Two months came and went… Before I knew it I was packing up the U-Haul and getting ready to hit the road…Yes Drive…I rented a 15 foot U-Haul with a drive on trailer attached to it and my car on top and started the roughly 20 hour and 1,244 mile drive from Florida to New York…Oh and by myself…which I still can’t believe..
The trip was not as bad as I imagined I stopped only for gas and bathroom breaks..I did end up getting lost in both Pennsylvania and Washington but in about 25 hours I had arrived at my destination. My sons grandma had found me a multi-family upstairs apartment in the city of Syracuse. I was actually really excited to start a new life and just new opportunities and experiences but I was most excited to see my child again. His grandma had him in an at-home daycare being watched by a family friend who had also watched his dad so that was cool. My son seemed to have been doing well there.
Fast forwarding now to 5 months living here.. I have felt kind of lost, I’m still not quite use to living here in the city being that I am from country suburbs, I don’t necessarily want to move back to Florida I don’t think that’s the case at all but I really also don’t want to live in the inner city of Syracuse. New York on the other hand is an incredible state. Lots of activities to do. The weather is much better than Florida. The mountains are insane… not only that but I’m 3 hours from New York City and about 3 Hours from Canada, which traveling has always been a big part of my life.
Here is the thing…At this very moment I feel like I went backwards, I had a nice house like I mentioned in a good part of the suburbs and, my income was comfortable and I was going to school. At the end of the day I had to do what I needed to do for my child but I don’t know its really hard, and all the changes I really think have been affecting my son…his behavior and attitude is different. I know that four year olds have their moments but in combination with my mental health everyday is a struggle to not just give up. I struggle to allow myself to believe that I made the right decision and that I can thrive wherever I am at.
I have been actively searching for a therapist and seeking help for my mental health, I really don’t wanna get worse… I just wanna be happy…
My son also starts school in two days in the city WHICH MAKES ME SO NERVOUS. It’s just so different here. I don’t even really know how to move because this is all new to me so I really don’t know how to teach it either. I’m struggling to say the least.
I really don’t think anyone will read this but that’s okay because writing as a release may be my thing.
-Beverly.
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drunkcleric · 1 year ago
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Been growing my hair for the last year for a lass at works daughters hair dressing final exam, which is cool
What's not cool is its been pushed further and further back from May down to late September at the earliest, and I messaged earlier this month to give a heads up I'd really prefer this done before a friends wedding mid September, if possible and got the ball rolling by sending pics of my hair
only to now find out she's on holiday til late September, and wants my hair totally bleached for the exam
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arumin-arureruto · 4 years ago
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Honeytea PT 2
Kyoya x fem reader and Hikaru x fem reader, Kyoya angst, Hikaru slowburn.
Warnings: none
word count: 1.7k
songs to listen to while reading:
What Am I by Why Dont We
Greek God by Conan Gray
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hikaru’s outfit:
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Reader’s outfit (your outfit can be whatever you want this is just what I had in mind while writing <3):
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Cafe Hikaru and reader are at:
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you woke up with the sun shining on your eyes, reaching out to feel the spot where your husband had been sleeping cold and empty, he had already left for work. Last night was emotionally exhausting, you had a fight with Kyoya and called Hikaru while your emotions were running high, even though you woke up feeling calmer it would still be nice to see him. You decided to get up and check your phone to see if you were still on for today, there were 6 unread messages from Hikaru.
“checking if ur okay”
“meet me tomorrow at 12pm for lunch at that cafe near my house, the one Honey got banned from”
“btw how the fuck do you manage to get banned from a restaurant for eating too much cake”
*picture of a single spoon inside a sink* “lol me”
“I should probably go to bed now goodnight”
He hasn’t changed a bit since high school, that’s what was so comforting to you about Hikaru. He took you back to a time where everything was much more simpler, lazy afternoons on the grass with the host club, drinking tea by the window in music room 3 with Kyoya, study sessions with Mori and Honey, getting into all sorts of mischief with Hikaru and Kauro, quietly reading with Haruhi, piano lessons from Tamaki…
All those memories started playing back in your mind and you started to feel all warm inside, you really didn’t know how good you had it. It’s not that you weren’t happy, you were married to the man you loved, you were one of the most respected and powerful women in society, what else could you ask for? But sometimes it felt like you were missing out on something, like your world could be so much more. When you mentioned this to Kyoya a couple months ago he suggested you try for children but you quickly shot down the idea, you were 23 and he was 24, having kids right now would be too big of a responsibility.
Shaking those thoughts from your head you checked the time on your phone, 10am. You still had 2hours before you had to meet Hikaru so going back to sleep was a tempting offer, but considering the cafe was almost 30 minutes away and you got easily distracted while getting ready it would be wiser to start picking out some clothes and getting in the shower. There was about 45 minutes before a maid was supposed to come in and clean your room so you figured that should be enough time to take a quick shower, you could just ask them to wait till you were done but you always felt awkward doing so.
After zoning out for a minute you headed for the shower, got undressed, put your hair up and turned on the hot water, you already washed your hair yesterday so there was no point in washing it again. You had always loved showers, the feeling of the warm water on your skin, the sound of the water dripping on the floor and the smell of all your products were enough to wash all your problems away. After about 25 minutes in the shower you turned the water off and stepped out, already missing the warmth of the water. After quickly drying yourself off with a towel you started massaging some lotion into your skin, first your arms and then your legs, this was your favorite part of your routine. When you felt that you had enough lotion on already you put on a robe, walked out of the bathroom and towards your walk in closet. It was september so the weather was still warm, today would be a simple dress day, or as simple as you could. Downside of being married to Kyoya Ootori: having to keep up appearances ALWAYS. After picking out a dress it was time for shoes, you gravitated towards a gorgeous pair of open toed gold heels that would’ve gone really well with your dress, but your legs were still slightly sore from last night so sandals it is.
After scrutinizing every part of your outfit and make up, which in the end you decided to go with a simple eyeliner, mascara and gloss, it was already 11:15. You grabbed your purse and asked someone to bring the car around. You hurriedly walked down the large staircase, excitement clear in your step, you got inside the car and gave a quick hello to the driver.
“Good morning Mrs Ootori, where to?”
“Morning Ryuzaki, Honeytea Cafe.”
“Understood ma’am.”
After giving your instructions you  pressed the button to lift the divider between the driver and the backseat, needing to be alone. You hadn’t seen Hikaru in person since your wedding reception, you talked on the phone occasionally but always for less than 2 minutes, this was the first time in months you would be in the same room again. Was it gonna be awkward? I mean you did call him yesterday late at night crying so what if he thought you were weird? No, no, this was Hikaru, your best friend since your first year of high school, everything was gonna be fine.
The 30 minute ride felt like it went by in less than 15, After getting to the cafe you told Ryuzaki to go back home and that you would call when you were done, since you didn’t know how long you would take. 11: 52pm, 8 minutes till you were supposed to meet Hikaru, meaning you had 8 minutes to get your act together.
You stepped into the cafe and scanned the place, 6 years and nothing had changed. Still the same old tall bookshelves lined the walls. The same paintings on the walls, and just like you remembered, peace and quiet. Since the cafe was a bit old fashioned it tended to attract an older crowd, old people just trying to enjoy their coffee and adults in their 30s that wanted a quiet place to work. While you continued to examine the room, lost in your own world, you felt a pair of slender hands on your shoulders and heard a familiar voice coming from behind you.
“Taking a trip down memory lane while blocking the way huh? Honestly y/n I thought commoners taught their children better manners.”
At first you were startled but then you quickly turned around to face the voice and there he was. Tall, mischievous smile and wild hair, Hikaru Hitachiin in the flesh. “Hikaru I-” you hugged him before you could even finish your sentence. You stood there with your arms wrapped around his neck in silence for a couple more seconds.
“y/n?”
“Yeah?”
“We’re still blocking the way.”
Oh right.
Behind you 2 old ladies stood with unpleasant expressions on their faces, you both moved out of the way to let the ladies through, they walked past you and muttered something about today’s youth having no respect for their elders. You stood there slightly embarrassed, heat rising to your cheeks while Hikaru looked like he might burst out laughing.
You decide to grab a table at the very back of the cafe, away from everyone else. After you sit down Hikaru strikes a conversation. “Haven’t seen you in a year y/n, how’s married life been treating you?” He propped up his elbow and leaned his head on his hand, keeping his eyes focused on you.
Damn so we’re already on that topic.
“We’ve had our ups and downs, what about you? How are you and Kaoru doing?” Hopefully he won't bring up your phone call from yesterday. “We’re doing pretty good, Kaoru actually started seeing someone a couple months ago. Cute boy he met at an art gallery.” You could hear the tiniest hint of jealousy in the last part, but overall Hikaru sounded happy for his brother. “Oh he did? That’s cool” you stay silent for a couple seconds before proceeding with what you were saying. “And how do you feel about Kaoru seeing someone?” Hikaru’s eyes shifted from you to the table and kept them focused there. “In the beginning it was weird, I hated the idea of having to share him with someone else but now, I see how happy he is with Evan and that’s all that matters to me.” He looked up from the table to look at you and smile, then he spoke again but this time in a more playful tone. “So are we eating or what? Man were you seriously gonna let me starve? Typical Ootori.” That comment made you laugh, you really did miss him.
You both ordered and paid separately, since you knew you would argue over who would pay the bill. After you both received your food you sat down to eat, while you ate you reminisced about the past and talked about all the trouble you used to get into back in the day.
“No no, you were the one that tricked Tamaki into dressing up as Haruhi to fool the doctors during the physical exam that one time.” He laughed and pointed at you with a piece of bread. “Whaaaaat? Me? I would never, I was just an innocent bystander” you defended yourself while also laughing, then you remembered something. “No but for real that one wasn’t my idea, actually Kyoya came up with it.” Hikaru stopped laughing but still had a smile on his face, he then asked you a question.
“So Kyoya…” There was a pause before he spoke again.
“You mentioned you have your ups and downs, I’m guessing yesterday was a down?”
The food that was in your throat had trouble going down, you tried to quickly swallow and answer Hikaru’s question. “Yesterday was definitely not one of our best days” You let out a nervous laugh. Before you could elaborate a middle aged man came up to your table and asked if he could borrow one of your chairs for his daughter, seeing that you were both already finished with your food you told him he could have the chairs and got up to leave.
As you were walking out of the coffee shop Hikaru tapped your shoulder.
“Hey my house is just a 5 minute drive from here, we could go there if you wanna talk more in private.”
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mimisempai · 3 years ago
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Wait for me on the other side 1/8
Summary:
Mobius, a watchmaker, and Loki, a teacher, realize that they are separated by two years of time when they exchange letters from different years in the mailbox of the house on the cliff where Mobius lives. As the two lonely hearts feel they have found their soulmate, will they ever meet?
or the Lakehouse AU that nobody asked for.
Notes:
This is my very first multi-chapter AU. I hope you'll enjoy it. Chapters will be released on a weekly basis.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/32948254/chapters/81773392
3772 words - rating G
Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 (End)
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When two people "connect" the bond between them can be so pure and simple as to stir hearts in heaven.
When they connect in all the right places at all the wrong times, heaven weeps for broken hearts. To heal these broken hearts, heaven breaks time.
—Blithe Spiritus
Loki took one last look through the rearview mirror at the cottage on the edge of the cliff, which was getting smaller and smaller as he drove away.
Shifting his gaze forward, his face slid to the crate on the passenger seat, where Croki, his pet alligator, was sitting.
"I hope you will like your new home..." Loki sighed.
Then suddenly, he braked abruptly, holding back the cage with one hand as it slid forward. Then he backed the car up.
"Shit. I'm sorry Croc'"
He walked over to the mailbox. He put his hand through the window, opened the mailbox and put an envelope inside. Then his long fingers pulled the red flag in a vertical position, to indicate that there was mail. All this under the eyes of Croki who followed with attention all his gestures.
He tapped the top of the cage, "Come on, this time we're off for good."
He rolled, speeding up, refusing to look at the sign for the tiny village his home was in, New Asgard.  Loki rolled east, the cliff behind him, then passed a sign: New York, 35 miles.
The traffic became heavier as he approached the city.
After maneuvering through the various streets and making his way through the New York traffic, he stopped in front of an apartment building on a busy street. It was a very recent building, cold and sterile. The contrast with the tranquility of New-Asgard was striking.
He parked, got out of the car and took a moment to absorb the change in his surroundings. Then with a sigh, he began to unload his things.
**********
Loki stopped at the steps in front of the entrance to the imposing establishment - September High-School. He inhaled deeply to give himself courage before moving forward, climbing the few steps and pushing open the heavy door. He entered and walked to what appeared to be the front desk where a busy looking secretary was standing.
Loki asked softly, "Excuse me?"
"Just a minute, okay?"
Loki waited a minute, politely, then tried to get the secretary's attention again.
"Ahem... Excuse me, I need to..."
She handed him a stack of paper, while saying, without looking at him, "Just fill this out and wait for me there, okay?"
Loki handed it back to her.
"No, I'm Loki Laufeyson. I'm a new teacher. I was told to report here."
The secretary looked sheepish, "Oh, I'm sorry, Professor. You need to find Principal Romanov. She should be around here. A woman with red hair, dressed in black, you can't miss her."
He did indeed find the Principal in the hallway that the secretary had pointed out.
Natasha Romanov may have looked young to be a high school principal, but everything about her demeanor, her head carriage, her attitude exuded confidence and authority. She walked quickly down the hallway and Loki, though tall, had a hard time keeping up with her.
The principal handed him a large stack of files as soon as they arrived in her office.
"You will be in charge of the sophomores, this morning you will have three classes to teach and three this afternoon."
Loki repeated to be sure, "Three?"
"That's a quiet day, for a first day."
Loki looked a little dazed, he didn't think he was going to jump into the deep end and thought he would have some time to adjust.
The principal turned around, as if she sensed his hesitation, "The teacher you replaced let us down without notice, and it took us a while to find the right replacement, the students lost a lot of time for their final exams. We have to do our best to make sure they pass."
They walked past a student who was sitting alone on a bench, looking sulky. Romanov motioned to a supervisor.
"What's he doing here?"
The supervisor replied, "He was grounded because he took apart a computer to prove Professor Banner wrong and has to do an hour of gym under Professor Odinson's supervision. However, I can't leave the place unattended, and I was waiting for my backup to take him there.
"Peter get up," said principal Romanov in a sharp tone.
The young man stood up, a sulky look on his face.
"Professor Laufeyson, take him to Professor Odinson in the gym and then you can begin your lessons in this class."
The principal pointed to the door of the classroom in question, then turned and walked back to her office, not waiting for an answer.
"Well come with me, Mister...?"
The young boy followed his lead and replied with a pouty tone, "Parker, Peter Parker. »
"Then let's go Mr. Parker, the computer dismantler." replied Loki with a wink.  He knew he couldn't condone what the young man had done, but he couldn't help but find it amusing.
Seeing that the professor didn't look reproachful as he said these words, Peter lost his pout and got a small smile.
"Although I'm curious as to what could have caused you to disassemble a computer."
Peter seemed to come back to life, explained to an amused Loki, that Professor Banner, who taught biology, had said that nothing could compare to the complex construction that was a living being and Peter had wanted to show him the opposite by dismantling the Professor's laptop.
"But I was about to put it back together though, I don't understand why he got so upset."
Loki couldn't help but laugh.
Peter's face frowned because they had arrived at the gym.
They walked through the door and there a giant blonde man came striding in, "Peter Parker, it's been so long! Tell me what you've been up to again." he ruffled Peter's hair who tried to shy away from it, then he held out his hand to Loki who had to hold back a wince at the strength of the professor's grip.
"Professor Odinson, but call me Thor. Nice to meet you. New professor?"
"Yes, I am the new literature professor, Loki Laufeyson, but call me Loki. I'll leave this promising young man to you," He winked at Peter before continuing, "as for me I'll be teaching my first class."
"Welcome here, and good luck!" threw Thor at him before turning back to Peter, "Go change, we'll start with 10 laps running around the basketball court."
Hearing Peter's grumbles, Loki smiled as he walked away.
A few minutes later, he stopped outside his classroom door and took a deep breath.
"It takes a little time to adjust, but most of the students here are exceptional and the teaching staff is really, really nice."
Loki turned to see who had just spoken.
He found himself facing a black man, taller than him, and very impressive. But despite his imposing nature, his smile and eyes were very warm as he held out his hand. "Heimdall, art professor, welcome."
Loki grasped it and replied, "Loki, literature professor."
Heimdall gave a small nod in the direction of the door, "Good luck." then walked away.
Loki, surprisingly relaxed following this little interlude, walked through the classroom door with a confident air, placed his belongings on the desk and with an engaging smile on his lips addressed his first students, "Hello, I am your new literature teacher and I hope we will work well together."
He paused, letting his gaze roam over the entire class before continuing,"O Captain! My Captain! Who knows where that came from? No one? No idea? It's-"
A young boy raised his hand at the back of the classroom.
"Yes Mister...?"
"Keener, Harley Keener."
"All right Mister Keener, I'm listening."
"It's a Walt Whitman poem about Abraham Lincoln. And it's plagiarism of Professor Keating's introduction played by Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society."
Loki didn't lose his confidence at all and replied, "Thank you Mr. Keener. I'm not going to apologize for the plagiarism. I didn't expect anyone to contradict me since this film was released long before you were all born. Thank you, Mr. Keener, for setting me straight. I won't ask you to call me Captain, Sir, or Professor, but simply Loki. Yes, Mr. Keener, Loki, as in the Norse god of mischief... "
The whole class, including Harley, laughed and Loki thought that it wasn't such a bad start.
But he still felt exhausted at the end of the day, and he slumped into the chair at his assigned desk in the teacher's lounge. He leaned in and put his head back, closing his eyes.
"So they've worn you out already?" it was the deep voice, which he recognized as Heimdall's. He opened his eyes to see that the art professor had sat just at the desk next to him.
"Yet the Famous Five keep talking about Loki, the new professor who is super cool. It's been a long time since I've heard a literature professor on such good terms." It was Thor who came to join them and pulled a chair to sit in the space between Heimdall and Loki.
"The Famous Five?"
Thor chuckled before answering, "They're called that because they're always stuffed together, probably five of the smartest minds in this elite school, and as a result always going out on the town to..."
"…the benefit of science." finished Heimdall.
"That's their argument every time they get busted," Thor clarified.
"Who are they?" asked Loki, curious.
"There's Peter who you met this morning, he's in the same class as his two childhood friends Ned and MJ. There's Harley who talked about how you put him in his place, when he thought he had fooled you. Captain my Captain huh?"
Thor chuckled before continuing, "and finally Kamala Khan, the newest one, a little brunette, a ball of energy who always wears a big red scarf, summer and winter and who the other four have taken under their wing."
"Interesting..." replied Loki, thoughtfully.
"Wait until you're the target of their prank and we'll see if you find these kids interesting." said an unknown voice behind him.
"Bruce my friend! Were you able to fix your laptop?" exclaimed Thor with a laugh.
Loki turned around, only to find himself standing in front of a man who was a little older than him. He stood up and held out his hand, "Professor Banner, I presume."
"Am I that famous?" the man asked, raising an eyebrow as he shook the outstretched hand in a firm grip.
"It's mostly that I had the pleasure of taking Peter Parker for his grounding to Thor." replied Loki
"That brat..." harrumphed Bruce. "He's smart... but his habit of proving he's always right..."
The other men laughed in unison.
"So boys? Are we having fun?" a young woman with short blond hair stepped forward and held out her hand, "Carol Danvers, homeroom teacher at this crazy school."
"Nice to meet you," Loki replied, shaking the outstretched hand.
Unaccustomed to being around so many people and especially such friendly people, Loki felt a little overwhelmed and suddenly the fatigue of this first day seemed to fall on his shoulders to the point that he had to stifle a yawn.
Thor patted him on the back and said, "I have an excellent remedy for that."
"What is it?"
Heimdall and Thor high-fived each other and said in unison, "The Bifrost."
At Loki's look of complete incomprehension, Carol explained, "It's a bar two blocks away, good burgers, good beer and for good company, that's us." she finished with a wink.
Loki realized they were inviting him to come with them but he hesitated and finally replied, "Thanks. I better not drink tonight. I'm dead."
Bruce retorted, "We're all dead."
"Yes, but I still have a lot to unpack."
They nodded, and did not seem disappointed by his refusal, even rather understanding. Loki really wasn't used to this kind of company.
Heimdall put his hand on his arm and then said softly, "Next time, then."
Loki, not understanding why his throat was tight, simply nodded.
A little later, they separated in front of the school gates. Loki on one side and the group on the other.
" Bye Loki!"
"See you tomorrow Captain!"
Loki lived only three blocks from the school and soon arrived home. When he entered he realized how sterile and cold his large apartment seemed.
He had not yet had time to unpack all his things and the boxes were scattered everywhere. The first thing he had unpacked was Croki's terrarium, which took up a whole room.
As he closed the door, he heard Croki's typical little paws coming and rubbing against him as usual. He patted his head and headed for the kitchen. Croki was a Cuvier's Dwarf caiman. Loki had once wanted to get a dog, but in the animal shelter he had immediately felt a connection with the animal, perhaps because he was different, like himself.
Loki opened the refrigerator which was desperately empty except for Croki's fish ration. He put it on a plate and put it on the floor while commenting, "Need alligator food. And human too."
He was going to have to do some shopping tomorrow.
After snacking on a bag of chips, exhausted, he took a quick shower before going to his room.
"Good night Croki."
His room was as functional and depressing as the rest of the place. He went to stand in front of the window. Outside it was all stone buildings. It was very difficult to even see the sky. He sighed, "What a view..."
He pulled the blinds and went to bed. Once his head was on the pillow, he fell asleep very quickly, which prevented him from thinking too much about everything he missed.
**********
A red pickup truck passed the New Asgard sign before parking at the side of the path that leads to the house. Its back end was filled with furniture and moving boxes. A mustachioed man with gray hair got out. He walked toward the cottage on the edge of the cliff and stopped, hands on hips, contemplating the view.
He opened the door, looked for the electric power meter. He turned it on and went to turn on the light in the entrance and then in what seemed to be the living room.
Mobius examined the place, satisfied. There wasn't much. A stereo, some books, an armchair. But the bare and cosy furniture matched perfectly with the austere beauty of the small cottage. He looked out the window at the cliff. He was going to like it here.
It took him a good four hours to unload his pickup truck by himself and install just about everything he had brought. Once finished, he grabbed a cold beer that he had put in the cooler and while drinking it quietly walked around the house before getting in the car to go shopping at the local grocery store that he had spotted on his way in.
Once he had gone around the store, with his groceries in his arms, he went to put them on the counter.
The young owner and his wife were behind.
"Hi, are you new around here?" the owner asked him.
Mobius smiled and replied, "More or less. My name is Mobius."
The owner replied, "My name is Clint and this is my wife, Laura."
Laura smiled and added, "You're going to like it. Especially now that the weather is getting warmer." Then pointing to the groceries, she added, "We'll get you some boxes for all that."
"Oh thanks." replied Mobius.
Laura fetched an empty box from a high shelf. Now that she was no longer hidden by the counter, it was obvious that she was pregnant. Clint rushed to her. "No, honey, let me."
Mobius looked at them, feeling moved and at the same time fully aware of his own loneliness. He paid, took his box and left, but not without promising the young couple to return.
He parked in front of the small road with his groceries in the back of the truck and noticed the mailbox with its flag up. He stopped and opened it. There was an envelope.
For the new tenant.
He took in the groceries, put them away, made himself a sandwich tray and taking the letter, he went to sit on the armchair in front of the bay window. He put his tray on a small table next to it, opened the letter and started to read.
Dear new tenant.
Hello and welcome to your new home and congratulations, blah blah blah. You have made an excellent choice, New Asgard is a wonderful place and this house is a gem, as you may have already noticed.
I'm sure you'll love living here as much as I do.
By the way, I'm the former tenant, Loki.
Mobius looked perplexed but also pleasantly surprised.
The post office forwards my mail normally, but if something should happen here, because the post service is what it is and we are never safe, my new address is below. Thank you.
Mobius turned over the letter.
P.S.: Sorry for the pawprints leading to the front door. They were already there when I moved in, as well as the box in the attic. I think it belongs to the owner.
Mobius stared at the letter in amusement and could not help but check the end of the letter.
He went to the front door. The floor was clean. Inside and out.
"What did he talk about?" he scratched the back of his head before heading for the ladder that led to the attic. He opened the hatch, poked his head through and looked around. It was empty. No box.
Mobius went back down, shrugged, crumpled the letter and threw it away.
He finished his meal and went to bed.
The next day, in his clock store, while repairing an antique watch with an extremely complicated mechanism, he couldn't help thinking about the letter and its more or less strange ending when he was interrupted by the doorbell indicating that someone had entered the store.
He put down his tools, wiped his hands, and headed for the store.
"Hey Mobius! I made lunch, shall we share?"
It was the bubbly and somewhat invasive, Sylvie. The owner of the antique gun store right across from him.
He replied, annoyed, because she had interrupted his work that he loved, "I can't, I have urgent work to finish."
"Oh come on Mobius, there's nothing urgent about an old watch."
"It is to its owner."
She made a disappointed pout, "Well, okay..." she sighed and headed for the door, then turned abruptly. "Is it true you bought a house? Where is it? How is it?"
Mobius rolled his eyes, used to Sylvie's chatter.
"It's an isolated cottage, in a small village called New Asgard."
"You're sick to isolate yourself like that!"
"It's what I want and I already feel at home there. And now, if you don't mind, I'm going to get back to my work, which is not urgent." He walked briskly toward his studio, annoyed by the criticism of his choice, and didn't even hear the door close.
In the late afternoon, after his day's work, he decided to repaint the faded fences that lined the small path. The manual work, like his work on watches, helped him to clear his head.
A few hours later, as the day was getting darker, Mobius was kneeling on the steps and applying a new layer of paint to the weathered planks. He finished, satisfied with the result, and began to put his equipment away.
Behind him, a small dwarf alligator trotted along the path. Mobius didn't notice it at first. The alligator sped up and before Mobius could react, he stepped into the paint and left footprints behind him. "Hey!"
Mobius tried to catch the alligator but it ran back inside the house whose door Mobius had left ajar. Mobius was about to follow him, wondering what an alligator was doing here and if he was dangerous, when he suddenly stopped.
On the ground in front of the house, there was a trail of paw prints.
Mobius rushed to the garbage can and searched with determination through his trash when he finally found what he was looking for: Loki's letter.
He stared at it.
Sorry about the footprints leading to the front door. They were already there when I moved in, as was the box in the attic. I think it belongs to the owner.
He remained for a long moment staring at the crumpled note.
*********
Loki went out to have lunch at a place he had spotted not far from the school.
Finding the weather warm, he opened his coat and continued walking.
When he arrived at the place, he sat down on a bench and started to unwrap his sandwich, a book in his hand. He enjoyed this moment of calm, even if the place was crowded on this beautiful day.
Once finished eating, Loki closed his eyes for a moment, letting the sunlight warm him up. Just aware of the surrounding sounds, the water of the fountain, the splashes and laughter of the children playing there, an old man grumbling about global warming, the pigeons landing not far away, hoping to get some crumbs from those who like Loki had decided to have lunch here.
Suddenly, a horrible noise, a high-pitched squeal and a horn made Loki sit up. He suddenly opened his eyes and looked around.
A few meters away, in front of Loki, a double-decker city bus was trying to stop. It was going pretty fast, although you could tell the driver was trying to brake.
Loki registered it all, the noise, the bus, before noticing the gray-haired man standing directly in the path of the bus. There was nothing to be done, it was inevitable and almost immediate, the man was hit by the bus, and Loki, horrified, saw his distant figure fly ten or fifteen feet into the air before crashing to the sidewalk. The faint sound of the impact reached Loki half a second later, due to the distance.
Loki automatically took out his cell phone and dialed 911. As he walked towards the impact point, he gave all the information to the rescue workers, trying to remain calm.
Once he hung up the phone, he started to run towards the lifeless body.
_______
Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 (End)
As always, bear with me as it is not beta'd and english is not my native language I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless🥰
27 notes · View notes
hyucks-archive · 4 years ago
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september 19.
word count: 7,342
genre: fluff
member(s): the one and only lee donghyuck
warning(s): it’s a sort of feel good fic, so unrealism™
author’s note: @haeloce has spoken - ask & you shall be given! this post is dedicated to you my love, thank you for always supporting my works
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September 19, 2017.
You look up at the azure sky, the gentle autumn breeze causing your baby hairs to tickle at your face. You close your eyes, breathing in the fresh scent of what you imagine to be of wilting leaves and fresh pumpkins. You shove your hands into the pockets of your block-coloured cardigan; while most prefer to stick to the monochromatic nude colour scheme in the autumn, you like to do the exact opposite. Summer is your season for monochromes, while autumn is your season for colour. There’s just something about contrasting the seasons that you’ve always loved to do.
Pulling out the ticket from your jean pocket, you hold it up against the backdrop – you smile, tilting your head to the side, eyes going back and forth between the photograph printed on the ticket, and the actual, three-dimensional scene in front of you.
“Looks even better than in the picture,” you murmur to yourself, shoulders dropping in satisfaction. You bring your hand down, allowing yourself to really take in the entirety of the one place you’ve hoped to visit for more than half of your life – the Nami Island. It first became popular because it was the filming site for Winter Sonata, but that’s not the reason you’ve always wanted to come. It’s the actual view that you’ve always been drawn to; the tree-lined roads, and the maple and gingko trees that would turn golden red and bright yellow in the fall. Autumn has always been your favourite season, but you’ve never really been able to really drown yourself in the things that are said to define autumn as a season.
You’ve always wanted to visit. But you’ve always only wanted to visit on a September 19th.
Why?
Because you first discovered the existence of Nami Island back in 2008, on September 19. You’re usually not one to care for such things, but when you have close to nothing to really look forward to in life, visiting Nami Island on a future September 19 became the only thing you looked forward to. Yet, it took you a good nine years to get here, because every September 19, you were never able to take an off day from your job at the café.
This year, however, you finally managed to. Granted, you only managed to, because you decided to stop being a beta, and start being an alpha. In other words, you submitted your application for an off day back in January, at the start of the year. It’s only because autumn is the busiest season for the café though. Autumn is the time where everyone rushes in for the pumpkin-flavoured drinks and treats. Autumn is also somehow the season that’s the most associated with coffee.
Placing the ticket in your wallet, you slide your wallet back into your bag, finally ready to begin your exploration of the beautiful island.
As you walk, you’re warmed by the site of numerous families and lovers, who scramble about, trying to get the most scenic shots of the island. There are two toddlers who are fascinated by the squirrel that dashed across the pathway, and another three toddlers who are busy picking at the fallen, dead leaves, while their parents attempt to buy steamed buns as a treat. Further in, there’s a waft of coffee, a scent that is all too familiar to you. You look towards the somewhat populated, hanok-looking café.
The atmosphere is so different from the café you work at. Here, it’s tranquil, there’s beautiful scenery to motivate you, and there’s zero signs of the hustle and bustle of city life (which is something you seriously detest). There aren’t business people who rush in for an americano before zooming out of the door, and there aren’t students who hog the seats to mug for their exams (although, you’ve been guilty of that at some point in your life). It’s just people who are here to really take in the flavour of the coffee, and to appreciate everything about the island.
You decide to buy a cup of tea to-go, just to support the business.
With the warm beverage in hand, you continue to venture further into the island, eventually arriving at a water body at the end of the trail. You look around, scanning the area. It’s even more peaceful here than it was back at the heart of the island; there’s barely anyone here.
You spot a boulder under the tree, so you decide that it’s a sign for you to take a seat, to enjoy your off day, sipping on your cup of tea, while listening to the soft, gentle sounds from the water. You really like this. For more than half of your life, you’ve spent it being overwhelmed by crowds, working ‘till your arms and legs go sore, trying to “get ahead” of everyone else. You’ve always quite liked the feeling of sinking in work, especially labour work, because it takes your mind off of every other thing that went on in your life.
Now that you’re older, and your body isn’t as lively and healthy as it used to be, you’re beginning to learn the importance of taking breaks. Sadly, it’s a little too late. The reputation that you’ve established in the café that you’ve been working at all along, is one of the ‘perfect-worker-who-never-ever-takes-a-day-off-even-when-sick”. You have this whole thing about not disappointing people that’s going on as well.
Sometimes you really hate yourself for it. You scoff – who are you kidding? You always hate yourself for it.
Even the thought of it makes your nose sting and your lips quiver. You blink fast; it’s a technique you’ve come to master, and it works absolutely amazingly when you’re trying to hold back your tears. Not everybody can do this, so you consider it a pretty big talent.
You hear the sound of dead leaves cracking, so you turn your head to the side, where the sound had come from, only to be greeted by a gigantic brown bear, that’s holding a tray of tiny cups, that you assume to be samples from whatever store this bear’s a mascot of. You notice the sunflower that’s pinned to the bear’s chest, reading the text out loud, “Smile! It’s a beary sunny day!”
You break out into a smile, murmuring, “Not the first time I’ve heard that one.”
The bear holds out a tiny cup, allowing you to take a peek at the brown liquid that fills it. “Is this coffee?” you ask, looking up at the face of the bear. It shakes its head, pulling out a card that he had hidden beneath the tray. He passes it to you.
“Try our brand new bear liquid! Contains everything bear-friendly.” You raise a brow, looking back up at the bear, “You know that doesn’t sound very appetising, right? No one’s going to want to drink,” you hold up both hands, gesturing inverted commas as you say, “bear liquid.”
There’s a hint of a shrug from the bear, before it reaches behind itself, bringing out a mini sunflower badge. It holds the sunflower badge out in front of you, gesturing for you to take it. “You guys give sunflower badges for free?” you ask, bringing the badge up close to inspect it. “That’s kind of a good marketing idea, actually,” you say, spotting the name of the café printed at the bottom of the badge. “But it doesn’t seem very cost-efficient,” you continue, poking the needle of the pin through your cardigan, hooking it back in, securing the pin on your left chest.
“Thank you,” you say, patting the bear on its shoulder, “You’re doing a beary good job.”
The bear holds out a thumbs up, turning around to take its leave.
You watch the retreating figure of the bear, wondering how tiring it must be for the person that’s inside the gigantic bear suit. Luckily, it’s autumn, which means cool weather, but it also makes you think about how tiring it must be for the bear in the summer. Getting up onto your two feet, you smile to yourself, “Well, I have nothing to do,” you whisper, allowing the curiosity to take over you as you leap forward, taking hurried footsteps until you spot the bear a short distance ahead of you. “I guess you’ll be my entertainment for the day,” you conclude, grinning widely.
You continue to follow behind the bear, taking cover behind trees whenever it gets stopped by a bunch of kids and their parents who wants a photo with it. It continues to give out the bear liquid, but you also notice that even though it has interacted with more than 50 different people, it hasn’t given out another sunflower badge. You wonder if it’s because it isn’t allowed to give out too many of those, which, obviously, would make sense. Then again, what makes you legible for the sunflower badge, and not the rest?
The thought swims around in your head as you continue to trail behind the brown mascot, the tiny cups of bear liquid slowly reducing in quantity.
You stare at the teddy bear sunflowers that decorate the exterior of the café. “Oh, that makes sense,” you think aloud, finally understanding why the mascot of the café is a big brown bear, along with the sunflower. You take a seat on a wooden bench, crossing a leg over the other, sipping on the tea that’s now cold.
Finally, the bear finishes giving out the samples of bear liquid. You watch as it poses with different children who are so amazed by the big, live-sized, animate bear. You take another big gulp of tea; it must be tiring, not only does it have to wear that heavy, stuffy bear suit, it also has to continuously entertain the tourists that come by every day. Because you’re so engrossed in your own thoughts, you fail to notice that the bear has spotted you. It wonders why you’re here.
“Oh, gosh,” you gasp, body tensing up for a split second. The bear is now suddenly in front of you.
“Hello,” you greet, smiling. The bear bows its head. There’s a pause, then you decide to break the silence with, “Do you talk?”
The bear gestures at its wrist, before folding an arm, resting its chin in its paw, tilting its head to the side questioningly. “You want to know the time?” you gather from its gestures. It nods its head, so you check your watch. “It’s seven thirty-two PM,” you inform. The bear claps its paws excitedly, and you react with a confused smile.
“I can talk now,” he speaks, sitting himself down beside you. “Don’t you have to work?” you ask.
“It’s two minutes past my shift,” he replies.
“Cool,” you say. You lick your lips, pursing them, then deciding that you should ask the question that would get you the answer you’ve been wanting to know. “Hey, can I ask you something?” you start. The bear turns to look at you, “You followed me all the way here just to ask me something?”
“Well, kind of,” you say, “Technically, I derived the question after following you.”
“So you admit you were following me?”
“I didn’t deny it to begin with,” you state nonchalantly. You can hear the bear smirk under his bear head. “You’re honest, I like that,” he says.
“Thanks,” you reply.
“Go ahead,” he cues.
“Why’d you give me a sunflower badge, but not anyone else? I thought this was part of your café’s marketing.” You point at the sunflower that’s still pinned to your cardigan. You hear the bear chuckle under its mask, its body folding forwards as he does so, a sign of amusement. “I gave it to you because I thought you might need it,” he explains, almost matter-of-factly.
You’re slightly stunned by his reply. You think back to the situation earlier – you were busy dwelling in the thoughts that make you feel sad, that by the end of it, you were blinking away tears. Just how much of that did the bear see? You’re uncomfortable just by the thought of it; it doesn’t feel right at all knowing that someone might’ve caught a glimpse of your weakness. You don’t want that. You don’t think you can live knowing that someone potentially saw you struggling.
“But don’t worry,” he begins, as though reading your mind, “I’ve already forgotten everything.”
“That doesn’t really reassure me,” you say, eyeline falling to the ground. The bear leans his body forward, mirroring your position. “It’s human,” he says. Your eyes travel up to look at his bear face. “I get really frustrated sometimes, too. But I don’t go all the way to an offshore island to release the stress,” he pokes, eliciting a small smile from you.
“I didn’t come here specifically to destress,” you share, “I came because I’ve been meaning to come for nine years already. I just only found the chance to now,” you finish.
The bear looks at you through its mesh eyes. When he first spotted you back by the water body, he saw the way your brows knitted, the way your lips quivered, and the way you were quick to blink away your tears. He felt bad for imposing on a moment that seemed so private, but he would feel twice as bad if he had just walked away, pretending like he didn’t see what happened. So he decided to build up the courage to go up to you – it worked out really well that he’s in the bear suit. In fact, it’s working out even better now, because he can stare at you, and you wouldn’t even know. He can sit beside you, talk to you like it’s nothing to him, because all you see, is a big, brown bear.
Still, he can’t deny the slight fluttering in his heart. It’s cliché, and it’s definitely not right. But he can’t deny, that he’s attracted to you. It’s superficial, he knows. But he’s also only going to be able to see you today, and today only. After which, you’d return to the mainland, while he’d remain here, continuing his job as a mascot of the café.
He likes the way you’re smiling fondly, just at the thought of being able to finally visit the island you’ve been longing to visit.
“Do you like the island?” he asks, mentally slapping himself for not being able to come up with a better question.
“Of course,” you say, beaming. “It’s everything I imagined. And,” you pause, “I got to meet a really friendly bear, too.”
His heart does another thing at your declaration. It’s foolish, he’s well aware. But again, tonight’s his only chance to experience this. Then, you’d be gone, and he’d be back to his regular daily routine.
“Do you live on Nami island?” you ask.
“I don’t. I take the first ferry here every morning, and the last ferry back every night. The pay is good, so I don’t mind the tedious travelling,” he shares. “Wouldn’t you rather just live on this island?” you question. “Do you know how expensive that is?” he replies.
You shrug, “Wouldn’t your total expenses spent on travelling equate to renting a place here?”
“I travel for free,” he says, “The boss pays for that. I bring in customers by wagging my bear butt, so it’s a fair exchange.”
You laugh, amused by the way the bear phrases its words.
“Must be nice,” you say.
“What about you? You look like a student, so I’m assuming you work part-time?”
The bear notes the smile you force out. He can see the slight bitterness peeking from your eyes. He mentally slaps himself a second time – he must’ve said something wrong.
“I’m actually taking a gap year right now,” you share, “So I’m working full time, to save up for school.”
He understands now. It’s odd, to say the least. He feels a form of connection with you, even though he knows this’ll never come to fruition. Still, even if it’s just for tonight, he’d like to be able to just talk about what he’s been bottling up for the last few years with someone. Even better, that this someone is someone he mildly feels attracted to, and whom will go back to being a stranger after the conversation.
“Somehow, you’ll feel that whatever you make, it’s never enough,” he begins, turning his bear face away. You wait for him to continue.
“No matter how much I earn, it’s not enough. I was once naïve enough to think that I’d be able to eventually fund myself to do the things I want to do, but as I’m ageing, I’m starting to understand that that’s not possible. It’s all fiction. Fantasy. It’s all what I conjure up in my head.”
Your shoulders sink upon hearing what he has to say. Why does it seem to hit the exact points? Why do you seem to be able to relate to his plight? In other words, there are other people out there, dealing with the exact same things as you?
“Don’t say that,” you manage out, trying to think as positively as possible for the both of you. “Money doesn’t buy happiness.”
The bear turns to face you, tone serious as he says, “Yeah, money doesn’t buy happiness. But money buys you the things that make you happy.”
You feel a sting in your heart. You’ve always tried to psycho yourself into believing that what you’re going through isn’t so bad. That you’d still be able to be happy, because money doesn’t buy anyone happiness. Because of that, you’d always feel guilty for not being able to find contentment in your situation. You thought it just meant you’re greedy.
You realise now, it doesn’t.
You try your best to paint on a smile. But the bear knows well enough that it’s all pretence. He wishes you didn’t have to try so hard to be okay. At least, not in front of him.
“Who knows where we’d be a year from now? We might even be doing the things we like,” you say, feigning a tone of excitement.
“We wouldn’t know where each other is a year from now,” the bear says.
“Will you still be working here, a year from now?” you ask.
“I’ve been here for six years now.”
“It must’ve been cute, to be able to see a bear mascot getting taller every year,” you comment, lightening the mood. You can hear the bear smile, which makes you smile in return. The bear’s heart does another flip.
“Anyway,” you say, “How about I see you, a year from now, right here?”
The bear’s breath stops for a moment – are you for real?
“Really?” he asks. You nod your head. “Really.”
“Okay,” he agrees, though you can’t see the goofy grin on his face.
“What’s your name?” you ask, only realising now that you’ve basically revealed just about everything about yourself to him, excluding your name, yet you don’t even know what he looks like under that bear mask.
“Donghyuck. Lee Donghyuck.”
“Donghyuck,” you repeat after him, smiling, “Nice name,” you say, telling him your name in exchange. “So Donghyuck,” you say, getting up from the bench. “A year from now, I hope I can walk away with my memory of you, not being a bear.”
Donghyuck chuckles, agreeing.
“See you in a year, y/n.”
September 19, 2018.
You hold the bag of carp bread to your chest, your heart filled with excitement. You’ve practically anticipated for the entire of 2018, for the 19th of September to come. It’s interesting how just one conversation, of course, filled with mutual understanding and relatability, had created such a connection between you and Donghyuck.
There hasn’t been a day where you didn’t find yourself thinking about Donghyuck. You’d wonder if he had earned enough to do something he likes. You’d wonder if he’s staying adequately hydrated despite the scorching sun. You’d even wonder, if he still remembers his promise with you. A part of you is obviously afraid that after making a trip down to Nami island, that the boy in the bear suit would’ve completely forgotten about you. A part of you is afraid that when you greet him with a smile, he’d look at you with confused eyes, questioning how you know of him.
Then again, an even bigger part of you is simply hopping around in absolute joy at the mere thought of being able to reunite with a friend. You’ve never been able to meet anyone that could relate to you, the way Donghyuck can.
Upon arrival on the island, you rush off the ferry, immediately heading towards the café he works at. It’s close to 5PM in the evening. You were held up at work, because your boss had insisted that you at least take the morning shift, which made you jittery the whole day because you weren’t sure if you’d be able to make it. Luckily, it wasn’t that busy today, so you were even let off ten minutes prior to the end of your shift.
Just as the café comes into view, you spot the giant bear hobbling about, playing around with the group of kids. You immediately break out into a bright smile, a sense of relief washing over you. At the very least, he’s still here, like he said he’d be.
You bring up the bag of carp bread – will Donghyuck like this?
Donghyuck smiles at the adorable children who are rushing to cuddle him. He isn’t sure of the exact time, but he can tell that more than half of the day has gone by, and there is still no sign of you. He’s beginning to think that maybe he shouldn’t have been so naïve in the first place, gullible enough to think that a random stranger would actually come all the way back to the island just to meet with him again.
Heck, he’s in a bear suit. Nobody’s ever going to like a person that’s in a bear suit.
“Look here,” a mother coos, holding up her camera. Donghyuck bends down beside the child, holding him close as the mother begins to snap numerous shots of her baby son. “Thank you,” the mother says, reaching for her child as she presses a loving kiss to his forehead, gushing as she whispers praises to her little boy. Donghyuck has a pursed smile on his face; must be nice for that kid.
Donghyuck isn’t given the chance to dwell on the topic because a rush of kids come by, screaming and yelling excitedly at the sight of the bear. He joins in, chasing the kids around, and that is when he spots the one person he’s been waiting for (a whole year).
You’re standing there, a bag in hand. He isn’t even able to control the smile that spreads across his face.
“Hey!” a child shouts, tugging at Donghyuck’s bear leg.
You bring the bag of carp bread back to your side, smiling widely as you make your way towards the bear. As though working in your favour, the kids begin to clear just as you approach your friend. You give a small wave, your heartbeat picking pace in fear that he might not remember you. Just as quickly, though, your heartbeat slows when he returns the wave. He points at the wooden bench that you were seated on a year ago, and you get what he’s trying to say immediately.
You head over to the bench first, taking a seat as Donghyuck poses for a few more pictures with different children.
Once he’s done, he jogs over, stopping a small distance in front of you.
“Look what I brought!” you say excitedly, waving the bag in the air. “It’s carp bread, because bears eat fish,” you giggle. You thought you were really witty to have thought of such an idea.
Donghyuck chuckles. Now it’s his turn to feel nervous, because he’s going to have to remove his bear suit to reveal himself, like he promised.
“Are you going to change out of that?” you ask, looking on with anticipation.
“I’ll be right back,” he says.
You wait patiently for the boy to return. He does, within five minutes. He tries to soothe his hair down as he approaches you, moistening his lips with his saliva, tugging at the end of his hoodie to make sure he looks decently presentable.
You look up, meeting eyes with a tanned skin, lean-looking boy, who is making his way towards you. You raise both brows – is that Donghyuck?
Sure enough, the boy stops just in front of you, scratching the back of his head in an attempt to let out his nerves. He smiles shyly, formally introducing, “Hi. I’m the boy in the bear suit.”
Your encouraging smile calms Donghyuck’s active nerves. He looks at you in the eyes, the same feeling of attraction he had felt a year ago, still evidently present a year later. He wonders if you feel it too.
“You know, you kind of look like a bear,” you comment, eyeing Donghyuck up and down. He rolls his eyes in response, scrunching his nose, “I don’t.”
“Here,” you say, holding out the bag of carp bread. “Eat your fish.”
Donghyuck scoffs, feigning offence, before taking the bag from you, and taking a seat on the bench, gesturing for you to sit beside him. He brings out a carp bread, splitting it down the middle. He hands you a half, and you take it graciously, biting a chunk off. “So how has your year been?” you start off, still in a little bit of disbelief that this is how Lee Donghyuck looks like.
For a whole year, the only image you’ve had of him, was the brown bear suit, with the sunflower badge. Even when you tried to imagine what he looks like under the mask; you’ve never came to the visual image of the being before you. He’s good looking, obviously, and by that, you mean that he’s way better looking than you had imagined him to be. There’s something that’s just really cute about his small little button nose, his doe eyes, and his round face.
“What you said was true,” he says, swallowing. “2017-me would’ve never been able to guess where I’d be a year later,” he continues, “I’m learning how to dance.”
You smile in pleasure, “I’m so happy to hear that.”
Donghyuck returns the smile. “What did you do for the past year?”
“I saved,” you say, smiling proudly. “I saved enough for now, so if I keep the momentum going, I’d have enough for university, too.”
“Then I guess it’s mandatory for me to tell you that you’re doing a great job,” he commends.
You feel something stirring in your heart. You’ve never been told that before. It feels funny, now that you’ve heard it. Donghyuck notices the change in your expression, and somehow, he knows the reason why.
“You can always come to me to brag and show off,” he says, tone gentle and encouraging. “I’ll always tell you how you’re doing a good job.”
You look at Donghyuck, meeting his eyes. He’s sending you signals of comfort through his gaze, and you’re receiving them well. Somehow, it’s only the second time you’re having a conversation with him, and it’s the first where you’re looking at the actual him. Yet, it feels as though he’s impacted your life even more than the people who’ve been in it for way more than he has.
“Want to know a secret?” you ask. Donghyuck nods his head.
“Back when I was younger, I was walking beside a classmate in school. We were about to go down the stairs, but she tripped on her own shoelace. She rolled down the stairs, and laid unconscious,” you recall, letting out a deep sigh at the end. Donghyuck looks at you with a brow raised, “And?” he prompts, urging you to continue.
“You’d think my first reaction would be pure concern for that classmate,” you say, focusing on the dead leaves that decorate the ground. You kick at a maple leaf, “But it wasn’t. When I saw the way everyone rushed forward, all attention on her, I thought to myself, ‘why wasn’t I the one who rolled down the stairs?’,” you take a pause, turning to read Donghyuck’s expression. He doesn’t seem to have any real thoughts about what you said.
“Twisted, right?” you end off with a pursed smile.
“No,” he states, taking another bite of his carp bread, completely unfazed.
“No?” you repeat.
“No,” he reiterates.
“Why not?” you question.
“Because,” he says, “It’s not abnormal to think that way.”
“You don’t have to side with me just because we are friends, you know?”
“I’m not. I just think that it isn’t crazy weird why you thought that way.” He says, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s kind of like how it is in my dance class. There’s this guy, his name is Jisung. He’s younger by two years, but his talent is more than double of mine. He gets a lot of love and attention for being the youngest of the team, and for being the talent that he is. Sometimes, when I see the way he gets praised for executing a move really well, I’d think to myself, ‘why wasn’t I the one being praised? I thought I did the move pretty well’.”
You chuckle at his kind attempt to try to make it seem as though what you had thought at the time was normal, though the circumstances are obviously far from being similar. Donghyuck is sweet, to say the least.
“I’m sure you dance well,” you say, eyeing his long legs, “You look like you’d dance well,” you correct.
“I’m serious about what I said though,” he says, reverting the topic, referring to how he’d be willing to listen to you brag any time.
“I might just take you up on the offer,” you reply, “As long as it remains valid, for a long, long time.”
“Are you trying to tell me to stay in contact with you?” he questions.
“You mean you didn’t intend to?” you raise a brow.
“You’d know where to find me when you need me, but I can’t say the same for myself for when I want to see you,” Donghyuck says, looking at you expectantly. Can you take that as a confession? Did he just say that he wants to see you?
Then again, so what if it is a confession?
You’re well aware of how you feel about the boy. You know that there’s a connection. You know that sparks are flying. You know. You know it all too well. But how can you be sure that Donghyuck is meant to be something more? You met him under circumstances that most wouldn’t even consider normal, and it’s barely the second time you’re talking to him. How can you be so sure, that he’s supposed to mean something more to you? How can you be sure that you’re only feeling this way, that you’re only feeling the butterflies and the somersaults inside you, because you’re truly attracted to him, and not because of how he makes you feel?
He makes you feel understood. That’s unfamiliar to you.
“Please,” you begin, in an attempt to try to brush off what he had said. “I kind of like that we see each other once a year.”
Donghyuck feels a light sting in his heart. “Why?” he asks.
“It makes our friendship special. How many people can say that they know of someone, who becomes their friend, on only one day out of the entire year?”
Donghyuck fakes a smile, “So you’ll be back in a year?”
“Yes.”
Donghyuck nods his head. Maybe he should just be happy that this means he’ll get to see you, at least another time, a year from now.
He shouldn’t be too greedy, right?
September 19, 2019.
It’s the third time that you’re going to be meeting Donghyuck. You’re starting to kind of understand what people mean by ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder’. Oddly enough, in the past year, Donghyuck wasn’t just a passing thought like he was in 2018. This year, he was quite a prominent thought. Sometimes, you’d even have sleepless nights, spent tossing and turning, just thinking about him. You’ve even gotten the urge to just go online to search for him, but there are so many Lee Donghyucks in the world, that you weren’t sure if you’d be able to find the exact one. It would also be a breach of your friendship terms, since the both of you are supposed to only rekindle every September 19th.
Today, you managed to take the full day off. You check your watch – it’s 10:47AM. Why have you arrived at Nami island at such an early hour? Knowing fully well that Donghyuck has a shift to fulfil?
Simple.
You miss him. A lot more than you’d like to admit.
Sounds silly, you’re obviously aware. How can you develop feelings for someone that you only see once a year, and that you barely know?
You’d like to think it’s just because of how curious you are as a person, which results in constantly being curious about Donghyuck. But again, that’s just you trying to talk yourself into denial. No matter what you say, you can’t deny that you’ve debated over fifty times about coming to Nami island before the 19th of September, knowing fully well, that he’d be here.
But every time you were about to purchase the ferry ticket, you’d stop yourself.
A year may have gone by, but the same worry still remains.
How can you be sure, that his presence in your life, is meant to be something more?
“Hey!”
Your attention snaps up to the familiar voice, the voice you’ve only been able to think of for the past year.
“Donghyuck?” you murmur. He isn’t in his bear suit today.
He dons a bright smile, jogging over towards you. “We must have more telepathy than we’re aware of,” he comments, chuckling to himself. You can’t help the smile that tugs at your lips as you ask, “You’re not working today?”
“I took the day off,” he says. “I didn’t think you’d actually come this early, though.”
“And what if I didn’t?”
“I would’ve sat at that wooden bench until you showed up.”
His non-hesitance as he said that elicits a feeling of warmth to spread through your entire body. Donghyuck really makes you feel things, huh?
“You’d do that?” you ask, just so you can hear it loud and clear. Donghyuck smiles, nodding his head. “You would’ve done the same. Otherwise, what did you intend to do while waiting for me to end my shift if I were working today?”
Your smile only widens.
“What do you have planned for the day?” you ask.
“Nothing,” he replies.
“Shall we find somewhere to sit and eat then?” you suggest.
So five hours later, you’re seated opposite Donghyuck, empty plates and half-empty cups between the both of you. He has his arms propped on the table, listening intently to whatever you had to say. Conversation is easy when it comes to Donghyuck. He shows you that he’s listening. He makes sure to pay attention to what you say.
You feel the connection growing by the minute.
“That doesn’t justify why you’ve never dated anyone before,” he says, shaking his head disapprovingly as he takes a sip of his drink.
“Says you,” you retort, “But I’m sure if I showed my co-worker a picture of you, she’d go crazy.”
Donghyuck chuckles, “You’re exaggerating.”
“I’m not!” you defend, trying to put on the most serious expression you can possibly make. “She’s cute too. Come to think of it, she’s totally your type.”
Donghyuck furrows his brows. “What makes you think I’m into cute?”
You smile, rolling your eyes. “Okay, then what is your type?”
“Shouldn’t you know best?”
Silence.
Donghyuck’s just staring into your eyes.
Your heart is thumping so hard, so fast, you’re starting to lose feeling in your hands and legs.
You let out an awkward laugh – there’s no denying it this time. It’s definitely a confession.
“Very funny,” you say, trying to change the topic. “I have to leave already, I’m working a full-day shift tomorrow and I’m in charge of opening,” you say, getting up from your seat. Donghyuck follows after, allowing you to lead the way out of the eatery.
“Hey,” Donghyuck calls, taking your wrist in his warm hold, turning you around to face him. “Don’t you think it’s about time to tell me where you work? Or where I can locate you? Or your number, at the very least?”
You’re looking into Donghyuck’s eyes, and you can see the sincerity. Like him, you want this to be something more. But you can’t just turn a blind eye and rid the fact that you’re just not sure of what might happen in the future, and that’s what scares you. You don’t want to commit to something, at the expense of knowing all too well, that you might get hurt. What if Donghyuck was never meant to be a part of your life? You’ve seen it in the movies – when you let someone in, and they weren’t supposed to be in to begin with, it only ends in tears and sorrow.
“Look, Donghyuck,” you begin, trying your best to think of a way to get your point across accurately.
“What makes you so sure that we’re meant to be something more?” you ask.
Donghyuck’s brow twitches, a sign that he’s taken aback by your question.
“See? You don’t know it yourself. What if we commit, and it just bites us in the back?”
Donghyuck runs a hand through his hair, “How would you know that?” he counters, “What if it doesn’t?”
The both of you just stand there, looking into each other’s eyes, trying to find the answer you’re both looking for.
“I believe in fate,” you say, breaking the eye contact. “On September 19, a year from now, I’ll be working at the café,” you continue, eyes finding its way to meet Donghyuck’s once more. “It’s located in Seoul. If, on that day, on the 19th of September, 2020, you’re able to somehow find me, I’ll take it as the sign that you and I are meant to be something more.”
Donghyuck furrows his brows at your proposition, “But Seoul is so big, how am I supposed to-”
“If you can’t find me, it just means that’s the end of our connection,” you cut in. “And you can’t cheat. You can only start looking on September 19.”
Donghyuck thinks it’s the end. He doesn’t think it’s possible. But if he wants this enough, he’s going to have to try.
“Promise?” you ask, putting out your pinkie finger.
“I promise,” he says, hooking his finger with yours, pressing your thumbs together.
What’s going to happen a year from now?
September 19, 2020.
“Here you go, enjoy your drink,” you greet, passing the iced americano to the man in the suit. He tilts his head in gratitude, before scurrying out the door. You take a moment to stare at the door, it’s going to be afternoon soon, and there’s still no sign of Donghyuck. You wonder if he’s even taken up the challenge, and is actually going about Seoul right now.
“Why do you keep staring at the door today? Are you waiting for someone?” Eunha, your co-worker, asks. You shake your head, shrugging, “I just can’t wait to knock off, that’s all,” you lie. Eunha furrows her brows teasingly, leaning in close as she says, “Please, I’ve worked with you for years now. That isn’t your ‘I-can’t-wait-to-knock-off’ look,” she says, pulling back.
You roll your eyes, hitting her on the arm lightly, before re-busying yourself with preparing the orders of the customers.
Another few hours go by, and now, the sun is beginning to set.
“You’re staring at the door again,” Eunha lilts, a teasing smile on her face as she sips at her coffee. “Stop, I’m really just excited to knock off soon,” you say.
“If you want to knock off so bad, you can knock off now,” she says, placing her coffee down on the counter. “I’m cool with closing on my own tonight.” She blinks her big eyes a few times, smiling teasingly, knowing that you’d deny her offer.
“I can’t do that to you,” you say, laughing awkwardly, “Think about all the times you sacrificed your nights staying with me for closing. I ought to return the favour.”
“Ought?” Eunha repeats, giggling to herself. “You’re definitely hiding something.”
You roll your eyes, moving on to do the dishes to avoid slipping up any further.
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Donghyuck sighs, coming out of the eighth café he’s looked into today. As expected, this is basically mission impossible. How is he supposed to be able to find you, when you didn’t even bother with giving him any clue aside from that it’s located in Seoul?
He looks around, trying to spot any other cafés that might be in the area, before he’d move on to the next.
There’s still a good few hours before the end of September 19.
He might still have a chance.
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You bite down on your lip. It’s five minutes to closing.
“I guess we weren’t meant to be,” you murmur, eyes refusing to leave the doors.
“Whoever it is you’re waiting for, they’ll show up,” Eunha chimes in, continuing to wipe down the counter.
“What makes you so sure?” you ask.
“Because it’s my first time seeing you anticipate something like that,” she says. Eunha might not be someone you contact outside of work, so it’s easy to forget how well she knows you. But Eunha is right. You've never anticipated anything this much.
“I hope you’re right,” you say, pursing your lips.
You didn’t know it a year ago when you made the proposition, but you know it now.
You really want to see Lee Donghyuck walking through those doors.
But as the time slowly dwindles away, you can’t be sure that it isn’t just your own wishful thinking.
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Donghyuck kicks at the pavement, running a hand through his hair. The day is almost over, and still, no luck. He has been to eighteen different cafés already, and there’s just no sign of you.
If only he didn’t have to work the morning shift, then he’d have more time to actually look in more cafés.
He stops a short distance in front of the nineteenth café. He isn’t usually one to believe in anything like fate, but he’s desperate at this point. He looks to the sky, clasping his hands together, “Please. Make 19 our special number. Please let y/n be in this café.”
Taking in a deep breath, Donghyuck walks forward, towards the café.
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Eunha checks the time, then looks over at you. You're sitting there, dazed, expression blank. She purses her lips in sympathy, calling out, “Do you want me to lock the doors or wait another f-”
Eunha is cut off when the bell chimes. You immediately turn towards the entrance of the café.
It's Donghyuck.
Oh gosh, it's actually Donghyuck.
Donghyuck makes eye contact with you. A sense of accomplishment and warmth overwhelms him. You feel your nose stinging, and your heart swelling.
“Sorry, we’re cl-”
You don’t know what comes over you, but you run forward. You throw yourself into Donghyuck’s arms, hugging him tight.
“Okay then, I’ll be over there,” Eunha says, excusing herself.
You pull away.
“You found me,” you sniff, grinning wide.
“I promised I would,” Donghyuck replies, reflecting your expression.
“I guess we are really meant for something more,” you mumble, taking in the moment.
“So,” Donghyuck says, holding out his phone. “Can I finally have your number?”
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llendrinall · 3 years ago
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What would Harry and Draco be like if they were parents? How would your take on it be from their child/ren's birth to adulthood?
Sorry if my English doesn't sound right.
Well, on the one hand I don’t think either of them would want to have children. Or rather, neither wants to be a parent. Harry knows too well what a bad childhood does to you and I imagine he would be terrified at the prospect of something happening to Draco and him and leaving his child an orphan. Sure, Ron and Hermione would take that hypothetical kid, but what if something happened to them too? And to the rest of the Weasleys? And Luna? And Neville? What would happen to the kid them? James and Lily gave Harry a godfather and it didn’t stop Harry from growing up in an abusive home. So Harry would be super anxious about that, imagining more and more elaborate scenarios in which anyone remotely capable of raising a kid without giving them life-long trauma would be unavailable, and Harry’s kid would end up in hard and uncaring hands, just like Harry and Neville.
(And I’m sure Neville doesn’t help on that respect when he says he won’t be having kids and if he has any, he wants them to have their mother surname. No Longbottom will have a claim to them).
Draco knows his parenting role models are awful. He was extremely spoiled while also suffering immense pressure. Draco got all the candy and gifts he ever wanted, but he was also expected to excel at school, be a powerful wizard and become a Death Eater. It’s not that he doesn’t have a frame of reference, it’s that the one he has is really, really, bad. How do you go not giving your child a mix of anxiety and self-absorption? He would sure like to know.
On the other hand, I’m sure that Harry will adopt anyone who stands still long enough. He is not one to let pain make him hard and cold. Rather, his suffering made him more compassionate.
So he and Draco would eventually adopt a kid (or two or three). Although they might also get an accidental biological magical child too. Let’s give the kid a name, just to make writing easier. Say, Celeste. Celeste the most likely adopted, but still possibly biological magical child.
Celeste would be happy and loved. Probably an only-child for a long time, because both Harry and Draco would still be scared at the notion of parenthood. Celeste would learn quickly to entertain themselves and relate to adults better than to other children.
Harry would stress about Celeste’s wellbeing and having them be self-reliable. Draco would insist on letting the child express themselves and find their own interests. There would be a lot of mistakes and doubts, but overall they would do fine.
Celeste would grow up under the assumption that candy exists only as a Weasley family tradition. Like, candy is something that the Weasleys do but no other household has it. Celeste has certainly never seen a candy treat that didn’t come from Weasley hands.
It’s because Draco has this weird crusade against treats. He got so many as a child! It’s a wonder Draco didn’t develop an eating disorder. There were many other aspects where Draco was spoiled silly, but since he wants Celeste to have a broom and learn to fly young, and also play an instrument and what’s the word? A game-boy, Celeste ought to play muggle games too, Draco is focusing on treats and candy which are completely banned at their household. The Weasleys just ignore the prohibition. It evens out. Celeste has some candy, but not as much as they would otherwise get.
I love the idea of Celeste developing magic (especially if they are some sort of magical biological child, because people would see them as Potter 3.0 Malfoy edition) receiving the Hogwarts letter, going to Diagon Alley to buy a wand, everything, all the little traditions and rituals, and once they arrive to Hogwarts… they don’t like it. Beautiful magical place, yes, but it’s still a boarding school. Putting aside that everyone, from teachers to students, looks at them weird because of who Celeste’s parents are, Celeste misses home, isn’t making friends because it takes them a while to open up and overall is having a bad time.
So Harry and Draco take Celeste back home. No questions. Their child wrote saying they didn’t like it there, so Harry and Draco removed their child from that situation immediately. There is no reason they can’t apparate every day for lessons and even if there were, even if there were all kind of obstacles… Their child wrote asking for help and harry and Draco want to do better.
They take Celeste home, where Celeste has all their stuff, is happy and can see Oso. (Oso is the family dog. A huge mastiff so called after a picture in a children’s book. The picture was of a bear, but to be honest Oso does look like a bear to any well informed three-year old).
Of course Hogwarts doesn’t agree with the new arrangement. Harry reminds them that on Halloween of his first year they had a troll roaming inside and things only got worse after that. Harry is told that most of those unfortunate events where a consequence of Voldemort. Nowadays Hogwarts is perfectly safe and perhaps Harry is letting his anxieties take undue hold of him.
“What about the student bullying?” Harry says, with heroic calm. He would rather set the desk on fire.
“What about it? There are centaurs in the forest, but no bulls, I assure you, and as you well known, Mr Potter, students are prohibited from wandering the forest. I do think you are seeing threats where there are none”.
Ah, of course. The wizarding world isn’t familiar with the concept of “bullying”. The application and execution, they know it well, but they don’t’ have a word for what is considered normal conduct.
Celeste attends the rest of the year as if it were a normal school, which is widely criticized although there are also many other parents interested.
And then… The academic year ends and Celeste drops out of Hogwarts. The whole wizarding world comes to a stop, although one should specify that in this case “the whole wizarding world” means “English wizarding society”. The continent doesn’t care if a child attends school or not. Welsh and Scotland care, but not enough to come to a halt. They do discuss it, but they go on with their business. It’s the English wizards who seem to have a problem with it. From September to December the papers write about nothing else.
The things is, Celeste has acquired some of Harry’s anxieties and is concerned with how little they were learning at Hogwarts. A lot of magic, yes, but nothing on language (and Celeste loves reading and learning languages) and even less about math. Not that Celeste likes math, but they worry about not knowing how to adequately manage the family fortune when their parents are gone. You know how wealth does not last three generations? Well, it certainly won’t if Celeste doesn’t learn how to balance expenses. Celeste wants to learn enough that they won’t be vulnerable to their solicitor., and when they put it that way even his gransfather has to admit there is a point.
(And maybe Harry failed Celeste here, letting his child worry so much about becoming an orphan, but Harry routinely receives dead threats and Draco has suffered two attempts on his life, so).
Harry couldn’t be more proud. No benevolent-looking wizard will take advantage of Celeste. Draco is also very happy because Celeste’s muggle school has art lessons in the curriculum and they have Drama as an extra-curricular. Celeste doesn’t want to sign to Theatre, but the mere fact it’s there pleases Draco immensely.
The ministry makes Celeste sits the OWLs in order to keep their wand. There are parents asking about educations alternatives, so the Ministry hopes that once Celeste fails people will accept Hogwarts as it comes, none of that day-school nonsense and hiring qualified teachers.
Except muggle school prepares you really well for the study process (or maybe, it simply prepares you better than magical schools do) so Celeste excels at the written exams. They do really, really, well, which is something Hermione Granger had been predicting for the last four years but nobody listened to her, so she is even more chuffed than Harry and Draco. Hermione has won sixteen different bets and is going to bring parliamentary reform to the education system.
Celeste’s spell work could see some improvement, but they have no trouble conjuring a corporeal patronus and that still qualifies as an automatic O in DADA. With that and some luck in Transfigurations, Celeste graduates Hogwarts having only attended a year. Lucius Malfoy, who is still racist but above all is a social creature and social climber, gives a week-long ball to celebrate his grandchild academic achievement. He also gifts Celeste a summer trip around Europe. Correction, because Lucius knows both Harry and Draco, but specially Draco, are very strict with gifts, he makes a donation to Celeste’s school language club. Did Lucius pay so thirty-odd muggle teenagers can spend three weeks around Europe practicing their foreign languages? Why, he sure did. And you won’t disappoint said children, will you Draco? I will take the money back if you ask me to, but little Prisha will be crushed.
There is a Prisha in Celeste’s school. Lucius is either weirdly stalkerish or paying attention to Celeste.
So maybe Celeste has inherited some anxieties and complexes, like many children do, but Lucius has become a better person and a pretty cool grandfather, so overall I think Harry and Draco are good parents.
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Text
Nervous Breakdown // Jay Halstead x Reader
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Photo by @karihighman​
Description: Jay is there when you start to break down.
Words: 1539
Warnings: None
Pairing: Jay x Reader
A/N: So, this I wrote for me. The schedule Reader talks about is my actual schedule. The sign offs are the things I actually need. This was me last night, except I didn’t have someone like Jay to talk me down from my nervous break down, I just had it and then had to be at my clinical this morning (which I’m still at btw lol). But yeah. Hope you enjoy. And if my posting is sporadic in the next month or so, this is why. 
“Come to bed,” Jay told you softly, leaning on the doorframe of your bedroom with his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at you with papers spread across the floor, couch, and coffee table. 
Your movements were frantic as you tried to organize them all, trying to figure out the best system to keep everything together. Every section was chronologically ordered for the online documentation, paper clips holding each stack together. Then, there were the colored sheets that had even more important signatures on them. You had to make sure everything was in order as class was drawing to an end. 
“I’ll sleep when I’m done, Jay,” you snapped at him before closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry, I just-”
“I know.” He walked over, stepping around the stacks before sitting directly behind you in the only place clear of paper. “Come here.” 
You couldn’t stop yourself from leaning back into his chest, his arms wrapping around you. Grounding you as your mind went a mile a minute. You also couldn’t stop yourself from grabbing your calendar, flipping it open to this month.
“What’s the schedule look like?” His chin rested on your shoulder as he looked at the planner. 
“I have to help with the EMT class Saturday from seven to three. Then I start my shift at work at eight tomorrow night. Then, work Sunday night. So I’m going to try and catch up on some sleep on Sunday. I have my exam in Med Emergencies on Monday. Then, I have an ambulance clinical AM shift at seven. Same on Wednesday. A quiz in Med Emergencies on Thursday. Then, I work Thursday night. Off at eight on Friday morning, but I picked up a shift from two to ten Friday day. Then, ambulance clinical on Saturday AM shift. 
Same with that next Sunday. A quiz in Med Emergencies on the seventeenth. Then work that night. Work the night of the eighteenth, but I’m off at four in the morning instead of my usual eight. Mainly because I have an OR clinical on the nineteenth from seven to three. But then I work that night, off at five on the twentieth because I have an exam in Med Emergencies that day. Ambulance clinical AM shift on the twenty-first. Twenty-second, I have an ER shift from seven to three, then I work that night. Work Sunday night, so I’m going to try to catch up on sleep that day. 
Twenty-fourth I have another exam in Med Emergencies. Ambulance AM shift on the twenty-fifth and sixth. Then, we review for our Final in Med Emergencies, but I work that night. I’ll get off at six to get to my ambulance clinical on the twenty-eight at seven. I work that night, but off at five to get to my Maternal-Fetal Truck shift by eight. 
On the thirtieth, I have an ER shift from three to eleven. The thirty-first, I have my final in Med Emergencies, and then work that night. Off the day of the first, but I work that night. Then, an ER shift at three on the second. Then, I work that night, but I’m going to try to switch shifts just because my ER shift won’t finish until eleven. The third, we have our student evals. The fourth, I’m helping the junior class with their Ops day, and then I have an ambulance clinical that night. Off the fifth, but work that night. Off the sixth, but work that night. Seventh is labor day, so completely free. ER shift on the eighth at three. Then, on the ninth, OR shift at seven.
“After that, I don’t know because we haven’t signed up for our capstone. Which all of this,” you said, motioning to the mess of papers, “is me getting everything in order to make sure I have everything done and what I still need. Because we can’t start capstone until all of our skills check offs are done, and we’ve hit all of our demographics.”
“What do you have left to do for your skills?” That question got you to sigh, putting the planner down and grabbing a notebook. You had to push your glasses back up on your face as you looked down at your messy handwriting. 
“Five peer reviews for pediatric intubations. Two peer reviews for needle cricothyrotomy. Three peer and two instructor reviews for trauma assessment. Five peer reviews for trauma intubations. Two instructor reviews for joint splinting -- which I’m already an EMT, why the Hell do I have to sign off on the BLS stuff again? Same with long-bone. I need one peer review and two instructor for traction splint. Again, BLS bullshit. Seven peer reviews for medical and cardiac scenarios. Eleven peer reviews for IV starts, and one instructor. One instructor for IV piggyback. Five peer reviews for IO. Oh, and another instructor. Three peer for IM injection. Three peer for synchronized cardioversion. One peer for defibrillation. Three peer transcutaneous pacing. Four peer reviews and one instructor for adult team lead scenarios. Five peer reviews and one instructor for pediatric team lead scenarios. Eleven peer reviews for being a team member. Three peer reviews for being a team leader for geriatric scenarios. Six peer and one instructor reviews for adult physical assessments. And finally. Six peer and one instructor review for pediatric assessment,” you read off, letting the paper fall to the ground. 
He held you a little tighter. You felt bad. With all the stress you’d been under for the past month, and with how crazy his job was, the two of you hadn’t gotten to spend a lot of time together. And the next month was going to be even crazier. 
“When are you supposed to start your capstone?” He pressed a kiss to your neck, your eyes fluttering closed in response. 
“They want us to start September Ninth, but I’m going to be the last one who gets to sign up because I’m so far behind! Everyone is going to pick the cool preceptors, and I’m going to get stuck with the ones nobody else wants,” you vented before huffing in frustration. 
It was indeed very frustrating, stressful, and downright annoying that you were so far behind compared to everyone else. That’s what happens when you have to be off for six weeks because you tore your knee. Now, it was a constant game of catch-up. 
“Just breathe when I breathe,” Jay instructed in that calming voice, following his breathing pattern. It got your heart rate down as tears came to your eyes, despite your internal protests. You were on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and it wasn’t going to be pretty.
“Maybe you should email your instructor?” he suggested when you had your breathing under control on your own.
“And have her take me off all my clinicals and reschedule everything? No. No fucking way. I can’t just email her and schedule my nervous breakdown, Jay. She was very clear in first semester that if we took on too much and couldn’t handle it, she’d take us off our clinicals and completely reschedule everything. I can’t do that, Jay. I can’t because then I’ll be even further behind.” You were talking a mile a minute, Jay taking a deep breath behind you. You took the hint and matched your breathing again. 
“Okay, then don’t email her. But, I want you to come to bed right now. It’s two in the morning. You have an ambulance clinical in five hours. You need your sleep. All of this will be waiting for you when you come home tonight,” he insisted. You didn’t want to, but you knew he was right. 
The two of you stood up, walking into the bedroom. You couldn’t help it as you collapsed on the bed with a groan, much more comfortable than the hard floor in the living room. He wasted no time in joining you, pulling you close again. This time, you were able to see his face at least, tracing his features gently with soft fingertips. You missed him. 
“How about we do something Labor Day? Just you and me to destress a bit?” you asked, Jay nodding in agreement before lips met gently. “I miss you.”
“I miss you too,” he said with a soft chuckle, kissing you again. “But you’re almost done. This is the worst of it. After your final, you’re pretty much done with lecture. Capstone is your last hoorah. Then, your tests and you’ll finally be a paramedic after over a year. Doing this through a pandemic. Through all your family crap. I’m proud of you.”
“You really know how to sweet talk a lady,” you joked, resting your head on his chest.
It was the exact thing you needed to hear. Jay always knew what to say. You were so close to being done. Then, you’d be in your dream career. All the hard work was going to be worth it. The thousands of hours in clinicals, the hundreds of hours in class. The countless sleepless nights and caffeine filled days. Yes. It would be all worth it. Just a couple more months to go. And Jay was by your side.
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temilyrights · 4 years ago
Text
Miscommunication
Summary: Jack Sloane x Reader. You accidently mistake a dinner invitation from Jack as a date. 
A/N: Exam season has had me in zombie mode but I'm almost alive again! I started writing this in like September and completely forgot about it until I picked it up again a few weeks ago. Pretty light angst considering my work. I wanted a better title but I couldn’t think of one and wanted to upload. Anyway, as always, feedback is welcome and appreciated :) Enjoy!
Read on AO3
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You smooth out the wrinkles in your outfit as you make your way down the path to Jack’s house, flowers clenched tightly in one hand, and teeth digging into your lip.
This was actually happening. A date with Jacqueline Sloane. You blow out a breath and knock on the door, trying to keep a calm exterior while your stomach does somersaults.
“You’re here!” Jack cheers as she opens the door, and you’re instantly blown away. She’s wearing a simple white button-down, French tucked into a pair of blue skinny jeans that fit her like a glove. Her feet are bare of shoes and socks, so you can see her freshly painted red nails, and her hair is in its usual beach waves.  She’s stunning. “Y/N?”
Your eyes snap up to hers. She’s watching you with amusement. “Sorry, uh, hi.” Your cheeks tinge pink, and in an attempt to hide that fact from Jack you shove the flowers at her. “Uh, I got you these.”
She gracefully accepts the bouquet, her smile turning soft as she looks from the flowers to you. “My favourite. How’d you know?”
You shrug. “You aren’t the only one who notices things.” It hadn’t been too hard to work out, she’d had a bouquet of them in her office a while back and then again in her living room recently. She’d had other types as well, but you noticed the way she always smiled a little brighter when she saw the beautiful arrangement of iris’ and daffodils. It suited her, and coincidentally also portrayed a fitting message. The yellow daffodils represented new beginnings and the blue iris’ hope, which was what tonight felt like.
She drops her head to breath in the flowers, a look of bliss crossing her face before she meets your eyes again. She reaches for your hand and squeezes, rubbing her thumb in circles across your palm. “Thank you. I love them.” She’s closer than before, and your eyes drop to her lips momentarily before you quickly meet her gaze again. Jack clears her throat and steps back, releasing your hand in the process and you try not to miss the contact. She signals down the hallway, “Well, I should go find a vase for these. If you join everyone else in the living room, I’ll be in in a minute.”
“E-everyone else?” You ask as your stomach drops, but Jack is already walking away, nose buried back in the flowers. You force yourself inside, and take your shoes off, leaving them by the door. It’s when you move to hang your jacket in her coat cupboard that you finally hear the sound of Ellie’s distinctive laughter flowing through the house.
You pause, squeezing your eyes shut as you bury down the humiliation and disappointment coursing through you. Of course, you’d misunderstood Jack invite for dinner. Thinking back, she never did specify it was a date, but she hadn’t mentioned other people either, and you’d just assumed, or hoped, or whatever, because it didn’t matter. Of course, Jacqueline Sloane didn’t want to date you and oh no you’d just bought her flowers! Flowers!
You groan and make your way further into the house, forcing a smile on your face as you step into the living room. Ellie, Nick, Tim, and Delilah are all sitting around but are way too consumed in what they’re debating to notice you. You take the opportunity to lean against the door frame and listen.
“Easy. No junk food.” Nick smirks, leaning back into the couch.
Ellie makes a noise of outrage, eyes bulging, “You’re joking, right? That means no chocolate, chips-”
“I’m not seeing a problem.” You smother a chuckle. He thought you didn’t all know about the chip stash he had locked away in his desk that he always ended up inhaling when he thought no one was around.
“-no takeout, and no burgers.”
“What? Burger’s don’t count!”
Delilah laughs, “Yes, they totally do.”
“Fine, whatever, I’m still sticking with my answer.” Nick huffs.
Ellie just rolls her eyes. “Well, obviously I’d choose no TV, how about you Tim?”
“The two don’t correlate, it’s not a fair would you rather.”
“You just can’t decide if you’d rather never watch Star Trek or eat Doritos again,” Delilah smirks.
“No, it’s just not a fair question!”
“Come on Tim, just admit you can’t live without your yearly Star Trek rewatch.”
Ellie hums, “Yeah, but can he live without Domino's stuffed crust pizza either?”
Tim rolls his eyes, “It’s not a fair-” he cuts off when he spots you in the doorway, eyes sparkling with delight at the chance for an escape, “Hey, look it’s Y/N.”
The other’s all swing around to look at you as you smirk. “Would you rather? Really?”
Ellie shrugs, “Need something to pass the time why we waited for you to appear.”
“Wait for me to- I’m early?” You pull your phone from your pocket to double-check, “Yeah. Early. Jack said half six and it’s only 6.27 now.”
They all frown looking between each other, Tim is the one who speaks, “She told us six.”
“What? She told me and Nick five-thirty!”  
“Dinner’s basically ready if you all-,” Jack says as she enters the room, her words quickly die off and she comes to a halt as you all snap around to look at her. Her eyes narrow, “Want to move to the dining room...Have I missed something?”  
“You gave us all different arrival times?” Nick asks.
“Oh, yes.” Jack nods. Everyone stares at her waiting for her to continue, and she rolls her eyes, “Nick, I knew you and Ellie were coming together and when you do you are almost always at least 45 minutes late to every plan we make. Tim and Delilah, you are usually about 30 minutes late too. Y/N on the other hand is practically always on time. By giving you different arrival slots, I could be sure you’d all be here by 6.40 when dinner would be ready.” She shrugs, signalling to Ellie and Nick, “You two didn’t arrive till six so I wasn’t completely off.”
Tim’s and Ellie’s mouths hang open in shock, while Nick looks mildly annoyed and Delilah is watching Jack with an impressed smirk. You don’t really know how to respond, but when Jack looks at you, her eyes dancing with amusement, you can’t help but chuckle.
“Now, dinner?” She claps her hands together, swinging on her heels and exiting the room before anyone can utter another word.
----
Jack’s outdone herself. The room smells absolutely mouth-watering. And Ellie voices as much when she swallows her first mouthful of food with a moan. “Oh my god, Jack. This is delicious.” Everyone murmurs along in agreement and Jack preens.
The conversation flows easily and as much as you try to keep yourself engaged, laughing and commenting in all the right places, you quickly find yourself retreating. You’d deliberately taken the seat furthest away from where Jack sat at the head of the table, choosing instead to sit beside Ellie. Tim sat the other side of you, at the end of the table. While Delilah was opposite you, and Nick beside her.
Jack's eyes had flicked to you a few times now, she was beginning to notice your odd behaviour. It wasn’t like you to be so silent, but you knew she wouldn’t say anything until she could get you alone, and it wasn’t like that was going to happen any time soon. Delilah was also watching you, and when she caught your eye, she shot you a questioning look. You quickly buried your head in your glass instead of answering it.
“So, how was your date the other night?” Jack smirks at Ellie, eyes teasing as Ellie releases a dramatic groan.
“Oh, don’t. We can’t all have the luck you do. How is the mystery person you won’t tell me about?” Ellie gleams, as Jack’s eyes widen.
Your gaze snaps to her, words spilling forth without thought. “I didn’t know you were seeing someone?” Hurt seeps into your voice and you just hope it’s subtle enough that nobody notices.
“There isn’t anyone!” Panic flashes in her eyes before she looks away and clears her throat, “I mean, there was a couple of dates with a man, but it’s not- we aren’t- I’m not seeing him.”
You drop your head so she can’t see the pain clear in your face, and quickly reach for your wine glass and take a large gulp. Jack does the same as an awkward silence takes over the room until Ellie, thankfully, starts talking again, drawing the attention of everyone and allowing you a moment to compose yourself.
Delilah’s watching you when you look back up and immediately catches your eye. She looks at you like she understands like she sees exactly what you’re so desperately trying to hide, and your emotions come swarming back tangling in your throat. Jack’s eyes bore into the side of your head too, but you refuse to look because you know the second you meet her eyes, she’ll see it all.
“Excuse me,” You cough, pushing yourself up from your chair a little too roughly and knocking the table. It doesn’t slow you down though, and you don’t meet anyone’s eyes as you quickly flee the room.
You lock the bathroom door behind you with a shaky hand and then lean back against it, allowing the cool wood to calm you down as you take deep breaths. Tears burn your eyes, and you so desperately don’t want to let them fall but they do anyway.
A date. You’d thought tonight was a date, and not only had you been wrong, but she plainly wasn’t interested as she was dating other people!
Your mind screams as you curse yourself for being stupid enough to get your hopes up. How many times were you going to have to learn this lesson? When had getting your hopes up ever ended positively for you?
Pushing yourself off the door you sigh, carefully wiping the tears from your face in an effort to not disturb your makeup. You wipe at your slightly smudged mascara with tissue, it’s not perfect but it works enough to hide the evidence of your tears. Pulling yourself together you spare one last glance at yourself and open the door.
Jack’s leaning against the wall outside, biting the hangnail on her thumb. She quickly drops her hand and stands properly the second you step over the threshold of the bathroom. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, of course. I just needed to pee.” You force a small laugh, hoping to dispel her worry and any questions.
She arches a brow, “Without flushing the toilet?”
“Are you policing my bathroom breaks now?” You laugh as panic clutches at your chest.
She takes a step closer, eliminating most of the space between her and you. Her eyes track your face as her brows furrow, “You’ve been off all evening.”
“I’m just tired.” You shrug and look over her shoulder, “Come on, let’s get back to the others.” You go to step around her, but she grabs your wrist, and you instantly freeze. You close your eyes before looking back to her. She’s watching you so closely and your heart starts thumping in your chest, but you force a small smile anyway, “Jack, I’m fine. It’s just been a long week and I’m just tired.”
“You said that already.”
You roll your eyes and take a step back. Needing to break the contact between your skin and her. “Yeah well, maybe because it’s true.”
“Also, you’re a terrible liar.”
“Can’t be that bad, still managed to beat you at poker more than once.” You tease back, hoping to distract her with jokes instead of letting her push any further.
“I was distracted.”
“Fornell’s chatter annoys you that much?”
“I learnt to tune him out a long time ago.” She hums.
You frown, “Then what was distracting you?”
Jack's eyes flash like she knows she’s been caught out, and she takes another step back and tries to laugh, “Maybe we should go back and join the others.”
“No, wait a minute!” You grab her wrist and pull her back in. She rolls her eyes, but you know it’s a defence to make you believe she’s not bothered when she clearly is. You think over the last poker night you’d won a few months back. You’d been in a great mood because Jack had gotten a little drunk and had been all smiley and touchy. After the game had finished, she had disappeared to Fornell’s kitchen to grab a beer and returned with one for you.
“For our champion.” She’d smirked, leaning down and hanging her hands around your neck as she passed you the drink. Your face had promptly turned scarlet and when you’d looked up at Jack to see her soft eyes and drunken smile the rest of the world had faded away. Your eyes had only been drawn away from her lips when someone coughed loudly.
It’d been Grace who had had a smug smirk on her face and thinking back she’d been shooting Jack that look a lot recently which was almost always returned with a glare from Jack.
“Grace?” You ask.
“What?” Jack frowns.
“She’s been distracting you.”
“Right, yeah. It’s Grace.” She nods along, and it doesn’t take a psychologist to know she’s lying.
“Now who’s the bad liar.”
She arches a brow, “Still you. I should probably be insulted by how much you look like you don’t want to be here tonight.” Her lips pout slightly, proving she is actually upset by it.
“I turned up on time, that’s a good indicator I do.”  
“Yeah, with flowers…” Her brows furrow again, her eyes examining your face. You release her wrist and step back, but it only causes her frown to deepen. “You bought me flowers.” She says as if she’s trying to piece a puzzle together aloud. “My favourite flowers and you dressed up more than usual…” Her eyes widen before quickly turning soft, “You thought it was a date.”
“No. No, I didn’t.” You rush out, even as your cheeks turn red and you wish for the ground to swallow you up whole.
Her eyes remain soft, a smile pulling at her lips as she takes a step closer to you. “You thought it was a date.”
“Jack,” You gulp, shaking your head. Her hand brushes against yours.
“You thought it was a date.” She repeats again, and it’s only when she’s this close that you finally realise just how happy she looks. There’s no pity in her eyes, and the tension seeps from your shoulders as you smile hesitantly.
“I may have thought this was a date.”
She grins as her spare hand grips at your waist. “You thought it was a date.”
You roll your eyes, “Do you wanna say anything else other than those five words?”
Her eyebrow arches, a cocky smirk tugging at her lips. “How about you kiss me?”
“What about your guests?”
“I’m sure they can handle a few more minutes without us.” As if on cue a smash sounds from the dining room and Jack sighs, “or not.”
“Sorry, Jack!” Ellie shouts, “I’m cleaning it up, don’t worry!”
“If there’s now red wine over my carpet I’m going to kill her,” Jack grumbles and you’re pretty sure she’s only half-joking.
“Maybe don’t kill our friend. I’d miss her.”
She sighs dramatically as she tries to keep her lips from curling into a smile, “If you insist.”
“I know it’s a huge sacrifice on your part, but I’m sure there’s something I can do to make it worth it.” You smirk.
Her eyes darken as she leans in closer. She’s focused on your lips but at the last second her eyes meet yours, “Before our first date?” She whispers.
You twirl a strand of her hair around your finger, before moving to caress her cheek. Her eyes fall close as she sighs and leans into the touch. “Wouldn’t want you to kill Ellie.”
She hums, “Yes. Might have no choice otherwise.” Her eyes open, sparkling brightly as her lips twitch.
“Yep.” You nod, as your eyes trail across her lips. “It’s all for the greater good. Saving lives. All that jazz.”
“Hey, Jack. Have you got anymore- Oh, oh my god, sorry.” Tim apologises, immediately turning back around as he steps into the hallway. He keeps his back to you. “Sorry. Uh, kitchen roll, dishcloths, if you have any could you bring some when you’re done. Again, sorry.” He quickly hurries off, and even though you can’t see his face you know it’s bright red.
You immediately start laughing, “I swear he’s as bad as Jimmy sometimes.”
Jack hums and then sighs as she steps away, forcing you to drop your hands from her. You can’t help but pout slightly.
“I should go check out this mess.”
“Yeah.” You sigh, and you don’t feel bad for silently wishing everyone else would go home so, you could spend the rest of the evening alone with her.
As if following your thoughts, she smirks. “They can wait a few more minutes.” And in one swoop, she steps forward, her hand sliding around and gripping your neck before pulling you in and kissing you.
Your eyes widen in shock before they quickly fall close. You pull her in closer, matching her hurried, hot kisses. It’s like fireworks, or maybe more just heat shooting straight between your legs, but you could so easily drown in her kisses forever.
She pulls away though, a proud smirk on her face. You must look as dazed as you feel. “You’re definitely staying tonight.” She hums, eyes dark and she’s practically devouring you with them. You gulp slightly, turned on beyond belief and you can’t believe you still have to sit through the rest of dinner and dessert with your friends.
“Any chance we can kick everyone else out now?”
She laughs and pecks your lips, “Don’t think they’d appreciate that.”
“Don’t really care.” You grumble.
Her eyes sparkle and she steps away, despite you trying to keep her close. “I’m going to get dishcloths. The sooner we get back in there the sooner I’ll have you all to myself.” She winks and retreats to the other room before you can utter another word.
You gulp and head back to the dining room in almost a trance. Delilah breaks into laughter the second she sees you; Nick and Ellie are both grinning, and Tim still has a pink tinge to his face.
You clear your throat and take your seat as Jack enters the room.
“Oh, thank god it’s just water.” She sighs in relief as she makes her way to the soaked carpet beside Ellie’s chair.
“Hey, Y/N.” Delilah chuckles again, and you hesitantly meet her eyes. “You’ve got a bit of lipstick…” She points to her own lips.
Your eyes widen in surprise and you swing around to look at Jack whose face is full of faux innocence.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” You whine, trying to rub the pink hue from your mouth.
“Where’s the fun in that?” She smirks.
“Should’ve just let you kill Ellie.” You mumble, using your reflection in your glass to see if you’ve been successful.
“Hey!” Ellie protests, “Why am I dying?”
You don’t answer her question, and Jack just returns to cleaning the mess without responding. Ellie pouts.
The second dessert finished, you not so subtly begin guiding everyone to the door, and the moment it closes behind Ellie (who you know took deliberately longer to leave just to spite you), Jack spins you around and pins you to the wall.
“Now who’s the one that wants to kill Ellie.” She hums as she begins to leave a trail of kisses up your neck.
“Between us, I’m sure we could do it successfully.” You sigh as she hits a particular spot, and you feel her smirk. “But no more Ellie talk. Or murder talk. Or anything talk that isn’t about you getting me in your bed.”
“Agreed.” Jack hums, before finally capturing your lips with hers. Your knees turn weak, and you’re grateful for the wall behind you. Your hands find her hair and her leg slides in between yours. You release a breathy sigh at the pressure, gripping at her hair and causing her to groan and lean harder against you.
“Bed. Now.” You order, and she’s more than happy to comply.
It’s a mission to get to her room because you both refuse to separate, too focused on getting the other out of their clothes.
“I’m going to make you scream,” Jack whispers against your lips, as her hands tease up your now shirtless body.
“Oh, yeah?” You smirk, “Do it then.”
And she does. Multiple times.
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mhdiaries · 4 years ago
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Wave 4 Journal of Jackson Jekyll
On September 9...
So it turns out I’m a monster. Well part-time monster actually, which leaves me pretty much full-time confused. It’s not like I didn’t know that mom and dad were both monsters. The first time I saw mom’s Hyde side come out was when I was 5 and we were visiting my dad’s side of the family. Some of the little neighborhood monsters decided that they were going to play “kick the can” only they were going to use me as the can. Every time I tried to run home they blocked my way and pushed me down. I started crying and then they really started making fun of me. Then all of a sudden I heard this roar and there was my mom. Even though it didn’t look like her I knew it was and honestly all I could think was, “Why mother, what big muscles you have.” Needless to say I never had any problem with the local monsters again. Dad’s a fire elemental of course and I grew up playing with Heath so I was never afraid of monsters. I just didn’t think any monster heritage had passed on to me. When I asked mom and dad if they knew me and Holt were the same person they said, “Of course we knew you and Holt were the same person - we’re your parents; now finish your breakfast or you’ll be late for school.” Well thanks for clearing that up for me mom and dad. Cause you know it’s not like having that little bit of information would have been helpful at all. Good thing I’m past those awkward teenage years where news like this could really have a negative impact on my psyche. (Ooh - sarcasm. I like it) HH
On September 12...
I had to go to the mad scientist, I mean mad pediatrician, today. Mom says that until I’m an adult I need to continue seeing him because he has the most experience dealing with growing monsters. I feel fine but mom and dad are worried because what triggers my transformation to Holt has changed. It used to happen when the sun went down but now it seems to be loud music, I think. The waiting room was almost empty except for a mother werewolf and two young cubs. While mom filled out paperwork I sat down and tried to find something to read that wasn’t chewed, gooed or covered in monster germs. Then I heard one of the werewolf cubs say, “Mommy! Is that a normie?” “Yes honey, don’t stare.” “Is he going to eat us?” I could tell that she was embarrassed so I said, “No way - I’m totally allergic to werewolf it makes me sneeze - ACHOO!” The cubs eyes got really wide and then she started laughing, “Aw that’s not true.” Then she held up her foot and said, “I can tie my shoe!” I said, “That’s amazing, can you show me how?” The werewolf mom relaxed too and it turns out she’s related to Clawd’s family. Pretty soon a lab assistant appeared, “Jackson Jekyll?” She led us back to a room and said, “The doctor will be with you shortly.” Then, “The wait.” Which means sitting on the crinkly paper covered exam table forever and wondering what would happen if I started playing with the instruments in the exam room and the doctor walked in. Anyway just about the time I woke up enough boredom and courage to start picking up some of the cooler looking instruments laying on the counter I hear the mad pediatrician pulling my chart and the door opens. He’s wearing a lab coat with purple vampire ducks and his stethoscope cover is a fuzzy yellow dragonhead. I’m sure it calms the younger monsters but it scares the normie out of me that the volatile nature of my elemental side + my hyde heritage + being a teenager = constant change. He said that the trigger would probably change again before I reach adulthood. Then he gave me a lollypop, scheduled me for another test and said he wanted to see me again in three months. Now I’m worried about what the trigger is going to change to next. What if it’s showers? Would it be worth giving them up for the rest of high school just so I can have my own life? (Not unless you want your new nickname to be “Stinky”) HH 
On September 21... 
It seems like I spent the first part of my life wishing I was a monster and now that I am maybe now I wish I wasn’t. (Well you’re stuck with it now.) HH When I was spending all that time trying to get Draculaura to bit me so I could become a vampire I never really thought about anything except wanting to fit in with all the other monsters. Now the part of me that fits in doesn’t even get to enjoy it.(Whine much?) HH It’s like the worst of both worlds and now I don’t fit in anywhere at all. We’re all supposed to meet with Mr. D’eath, the school guidance counselor, this week. Wonder if I’ll need to make two appointments (Lame - I already know what I’m going to be... FAMOUS!) HH
On September 23...
So I had my appointment with Mr. D’eath today it started out  about as terrible as I thought it was going to be. Turns out he’d never counseled a “normie” and it seemed like he didn’t know exactly what to say. In fact, he mostly just spent a lot of time squeezing one of those stress balls made to look like a cartoon character with eyes that bugged out when you squeezed it. It was pretty distracting especially when I realized it was a cartoon “normie”. The squeezing wasn’t nearly as distracting as his “throat clearing” which kind of sounded like a hand full of marbles being run through a garbage disposal. I kept trying to figure out how he made that noise because he doesn’t really even have a throat since as far as I can tell he’s pure skeleton. He must have flipped through my permanent record ten times before he finally said: So you see Hackson... I mean Jackson, the career opportunities for normies in the monster world are somewhat er... um... (sound of marbles being run through the disposal again) limited. There’s monster hunter, monster hunter’s assistant, mad scientist, ooh hunchback! You don’t happen to have a hump do you? No? Bad luck there then. Ah hah! How about Monster/Normie Relations Expert? (Figured it’d be something where the wardrobe is even less cool than what you wear now) HH Well that was something I certainly knew a little something about. I had an old coach in the normie world that used to always say, “Play to your strengths Jackson, play to your strengths.” So Mr. D’eath loaded me down with college brochures and rushed me out of his office. I think both of us were glad it was over. 
On October 8...
Finally took that test my mad pediatrician set up for me. It turned out to be a test to determine the type and volume of music that brings out Holt. So I sat in a soundproof booth wearing headphones while a technician played music at different volumes and with different time signatures. I made it through waltzes, marches, polka and chamber music but I don’t remember what he played next. (That’s when he started playing the good stuff.) HH Anyway the results of the test isolated the trigger; music with a 4/4 time signature played in excess of 90 decibels. You know what’s good about this? Me neither.
On November 2...
It seems now that every monster knows Holt and me are the “same” person/monster I don’t get hassled as much for being a “normie”. Not that it makes any difference to Manny Taur since he pretty much wants to bully down on any creature who’s smaller than he is. When he first started picking on me I stood up to him cause once a bully knows he can push you around he’ll never stop, but Deuce finally took me aside and said, “Listen bro - you’ve won a lot of respect standing up to Manny and don’t take this the wrong way but...” Apparently Manny was waiting for the right time to mash me like a slow matador. I kept waiting for it to happen but it never did. In fact it seemed like Manny was purposely avoiding me for some reason. It was almost like some monster had said something to him. (Yeah - wonder who that could have been?) HH
On November 15... 
Headless Headmistress Bloodgood asked for “volunteers” to help with the middle school carnival fundraiser so Deuce and I volunteered for set up and take down duty. It was cool and we didn’t have to dress up like clowns or sit in the dunk tank. We set up tents, carried boxes then hung out and waited for everything to be over. We checked out some of the other booths too cause we had plenty of time to kill. Venus and Draculaura were doing face painting; Rochelle was teaching monsters how to build sand castles, some of which would have looked pretty good if they hadn’t been built next to Rochelle’s sand cathedra with working bell tower and miniature gargoyles. The best though was the stunt Robecca performed. She flew over the carnival a couple of times to get every monster’s attention then flew straight up until it sounded like her rocket boots stalled and she came streaking back toward the ground like a falling star. A huge gasp went up from the crowd as it looked like she was going to crash then she fired her rockets back up and totally buzzed the crowd less than 20 feet off the ground! It was so awesome I actually gave Holt a chance to see her second performance. (Thanks dude - it was totally rockin’ and I would have been bummed if I didn’t get to see it) HH When the carnival was over we helped take everything down and all the volunteers went to hang out at the Coffin Bean. It was dark by then and I would have missed out on that part of the fun if things were the same as they used to be. Still hoping I won’t have to give up showers someday though. (That makes both of us “Stinky”) HH
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studyscribbler · 3 years ago
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14 September 2021 | 17:33 - Tuesday
Month one of university life has been interesting to say the least.
I'm doing pretty well in most of my classes, though they're stressful. It's difficult to stay motivated right now, as I don't really feel like doing much of anything. Sociolinguistics is starting to go over my head and I don't feel like I'm really understanding the concepts. But my literature class is starting to pick up and become more interesting and I feel a little more involved in discussion. We finally started one of our novels which has been more enjoyable for me. Spanish is way more of a challenge than I was expecting. I have my first exam tomorrow and I do not feel confident about it. I'm going to spend most of my evening studying for it. I got my grade back on my first paper that was due last week, and I got a 95! I was not expecting to do so well, especially since I wrote it in about four hours, but I'm happy with the grade and my professor wrote some nice comments and feedback.
I don't quite feel like myself. I haven't been acting like my usual self. I went on my very first date. It was with a friend I've known for a while and things were going well at first, but we've decided to just stay friends for now. Before uni, I didn't date or anything like that, so it has been really strange to see myself acting this way. I think I'm still not quite ready to enter the dating scene and I have too many other things to do anyway. My brain is tired, but it's not as foggy and messy as it was last week. I am ready for a break and for the weather to cool down. My mom said yesterday that I seemed burnt out, and she is very right. I am burnt out. I don't think I have time to slow down though. If I don't do work on a Saturday then I'm slammed with it on Sunday and it doesn't stop.
I'm exhausted mentally and emotionally, but this week has already been better than last week so I have hope that things will continue to improve and get easier. For now, I'm just taking it a day at a time and trusting God to meet my daily needs. He takes care of me.
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