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thiswasinevitableid · 4 years ago

Note

for mermay, 12 ot4 nsfw?

Here you go! 12 was “captured.” Barclay’s design is based on a basking shark, Indrid’s on a flying fish.

They’ve done it.

The crew of the Washington has captured a live mermaid; not the remains of one, not the stories of drunk or scared sailors, but a genuine, breathing, swimming mermaid.

Joseph keeps pointing out that, technically, they’ve caught a merman. One with a smooth, almost black tail, coppery hair and beard, and a human torso that puts sculptors to shame.

Not that Josephs attention to those details is for any reason other than scientific curiosity. He, Captain Hayes, several officers, and Duck Newton, the botanist joining them for this mission, are all regarding the merman in the tank constructed for just this purpose. Their guest is pressed to the far side of the glass, watching them with frightened eyes.

The only person who looks less comfortable than him with this scenario is Duck.

“I still say there’s no reason to keep the fella cooped up in here. Look at him, he’s terrified. And I don’t buy for one second the crew was gentle when they hauled him up. He fought at all, they probably got rough with him.”

“It is a good thing, then, Mr. Newton that you are not in charge of this endeavor.” Hayes says with a disapproving glance at the scientist. Duck frowns the instant the captain looks elsewhere. Joseph is more on Duck’s side, the mans willingness to speak up when he sees something unkind one of Joseph’s favorite traits. But he’s certain there’s room for compromise between the two views; after all, that’s why he’s here.

--------------------------------------------------------------

This is the worst day of Barclay’s life.

One minute he’s searching for urchins near shore, the next he’s being pulled towards the surface in a net. The last thing he sees under the waves is Indrid rounding the rocks, his red eyes widening in anger and sorrow as Barclay is heaved into a longboat.

Barclay wishes he could tell him it isn’t his fault; the other mer has done so much to look out for him, but you can’t stay ahead of danger forever. Instead he’s huddled in the far corner of his prison, wanting to know what’s happening but terrified of drawing the human’s attention back to him. A parade of them come and go, some pointing at him or talking in circles while looking his way. One, black haired and tall, is in the room the most, writing at a desk and pulling books from a short set of shelves. His most frequent companion is another dark-haired man, shorter and stouter who keeps glancing at the first man whenever he thinks he’s not looking, then turning away with a pink color in his cheeks.

The moon is up now, and only the tall human remains, writing by the light of a lantern. Cautiously, Barclay rises so his head is out of the water. At the splash, the human turns.

“Oh, good evening. I, um, I’m sorry for not introducing myself sooner, but I decided it would probably be less frightening if I let you come to me in your own time. I’m Joseph Stern.”

“Barclay. Uh, are, are you the one who had them catch me?”

Joseph shakes his head, “No. I’m one of two scientists aboard this vessel. Her primary goal is to find new valuable riches for trade, but a secondary one is to collect knowledge of rare and exotic creatures, so that we might broaden our understanding of the world. I specialize in animals and my colleague, Duck, is an expert in plants.”

“...That doesn’t explain why I’m here. I’m neither of those things.”

The human sighs, “I know, but most of the sailors and officers view you as an animal.”

“But not you?” He narrows his eyes, swimming backwards.

“Not at all. In all my research, I’ve found nothing to suggest merfolk are any less men than myself. The way you and I are talking now confirms that.”

“So I can go now?”

“No” he must notice the alarm in Barclay’s face because he sets his hands on the rim and the tank and adds, hurriedly, “but you’ll get to eventually. My job is to learn all I can from you, about your kind, your numbers, things like that. I’d prefer to do it in a more comfortable setting but I was, um, overruled.” He gives Barclay a reassuring smile, eyes bluer than open sea on a summer day, “You’ll be a free man in no time, I promise.”

Barclay nods, sinks back under the water, and eventually falls asleep. When wakes up at dawn, Joseph is still there, asleep in his chair. When Barclay asks if that’s how humans sleep, the man shakes his head, “No, we have beds. I just didn’t want to leave you alone your first night here, in case there was something you needed.”

His stomach growls as another human arrives with a tray of food and a pot of something that smells very, very good. He leans out of the tank, startling Joseph when he turns around.

“Oh! Um, I asked them to bring fish for your breakfast but you can try some of mine if you like. Assuming it won’t make you sick?”

“I’ve had human food before. But that’s new” he points at the pot, “Ma-, uh, the humans I know only drink tea.”

Joseph hands him the cup of what he soon learns is coffee and he sips it with a sigh; it’s bitter, but woody and dark in a way he enjoys. The human leaves, returns a few minutes later with a second cup, slides the tray within arms reach of Barclay and pulls a notebook from his desk, “Do you mind if we talk over breakfast?”

Barclay doesn’t mind at all. In fact, as the days go by he minds his captivity less and less. He and Joseph talk for hours, not only about mer society but about humans and their lives as well. About myths and stories, and a great deal about food, which Joseph brings him in abundance. Some of it gets soggy when Barclay tries to hold it, and they settle on Joseph keeping it between his fingers or in his palm while Barclay samples it. The first few times they do this the human blushes and looks away. When he finally meets Barclay’s eyes, the mer grins at him and licks his palm clean.

Joseph also takes great care to ensure Barclay isn’t bored. Barclay learns some chess and card games by watching Joseph and Duck play after dinner. In exchange he teaches Joseph how to play Five Shells High. When Joseph isn’t around, Barclay talks to Duck, and finds him good company, funny but also happy to let Barclay think in peace.

He still longs for his freedom, for the ability to dive and swim in an endless sea. However, as Joseph sits beside his tank in the evenings, reading to him and smiling whenever Barclay reaches out to toy with his hair, he’s not in much of a hurry to get home as he should be.

----------------------------------------------

Any other time, Duck would tease Joe for mooning over a merman and reading him bedtime stories. Trouble is, he’s not much better.

The night they brought Barclay aboard, Duck was halfway to bed when someone threw a crab through his open window. Peering out revealed another merman, silver haired and wary.

“Duck Newton?”

“Yeah?”

“Oh, that is a relief. I was afraid I’d alerted the wrong human to my presence.”

“You threw this into my room on purpose?”

“Indeed. I, ah, foresaw you being both sympathetic to my plight and disinclined to tell others of my being here.” He stays close to the hull, voice a lilting whisper.

“The fella we caught today a friend of yours?”

“Yes, a close one. Is he alright? I, my visions show he is safe and that the human looking after him is kind but I, I am” his red eyes look sadly down at the water, “I am worried all the same.”

Duck wants to reach out to him, stroke that moonlight hair and tell him not to worry, “Ain’t no shame in carin about a friend. He’s safe, and he won’t be stuck on this boat forever. And the man stayin with him is a decent, honorable sort.”

The mer sighs, rests his head on the side of the ship, “Thank goodness.” When he turns his face to Duck, it steals the breath from his lungs, “may I come to you again for news of him?”

Duck smiles, “Sure.”

Indrid, as the mer calls himself, comes back every night. Luckily, Joe spends his nights in the cargo room with Barclay instead of in his and Duck’s quarters, so there’s no one to witness their conversations. It’s not that the other man would react badly; as much as Duck likes him, Joe is a little too inclined to defer to authority, and might put Indrid in danger without meaning to.

Better still, when Duck is ashore searching for specimens, Indrid keeps him company. The mer swims parallel to his path in the sand, or follows him up briny tributaries to show him rare plants.

Unlike Barclay, Indrid has visible fins beside the one on his back; two he can extend from his sides. All are the same silver-blue shade that colors Duck’s dreams these days.

Tonight they’re talking at the window about Duck’s travels when Indrid goes still. Then he sinks under the waves as the door behind Duck opens.

“Mr.Newton, who are you talking to? The men said they saw a creature off the side of the ship.”

“Uhhhhhhhh”

----------------------------------------------------------

“I despise you.” Indrid glares over the edge of his tank.

“I said I was sorry! Ain’t my fault I can’t lie for shit.”

“No, but you could have told me about that issue before it got me imprisoned on a ship!”

“Hey, you’re the one who can see the future, you coulda warned me they were comin.”

Joseph and Barclay trade a concerned look; after an initial chirp of joy at seeing Barclay, Indrid directed all his focus to glaring at Duck while Woodbridge gave them their orders.

“Um, Indrid, right? I’m sure Duck didn’t mean for you to be caught. And we’ll both make sure you’re comfortable while you’re here.”

Indrid spares a dagger filled glance for Joseph, then swims to the side of the tank closest to Barclay’s enclosure, popping up and leaning over to his friend, the two of them trading clicks and trills. The conversation calms Indrid some. Barclay explains later that he assured his friend the stay was only temporary and, while the conditions were not ideal, the company was good.

All the same, any time Duck sits near Indrid’s tank, a silver tail splashes him with water. The botanist takes it in stride, seeming to accept it as a deserved penalty for getting Indrid trapped.

Several days later, as they’re both working, the botanist sets down his pen, stands, and sets his back against Indrid’s tank.

“Joe, gimme a hand please.”

Joseph pushes as hard as he can, and the tank scrapes across the floor.

“I can still splash you from here.”

“That’s not why I’m doin it. You and Barclay keep starin at each other all sad; seems mighty cruel to keep you where you can see each other but can’t touch.”

Indrid falls silent until they get the tanks side by side. Then he rises from the water and leans out to rub his cheek against Duck’s own with a trill of thanks. The research room is more peaceful (and much drier) after that.

Three nights later, dinner stops by the hold to see if either of the mers needs anything from him. He opens and then immediately shuts the door and backs away; he’s learned that mers are demonstrative, but heated, frantic kissing and moaning suggests something they’d rather not have him present for. Lord, why did it look like Barclay had two…

The hall is hotter than a furnace, and as he walks down it as fast as dignity will allow, Duck steps from the officers dining room. Wordlessly, Joseph grabs him and pulls him the rest of the way to their room.

“Everythin okay JoeOHfuck” Duck’s heads thuds back against the door as Joseph palms him through his trousers, “what’s gotten into you huh?”

“I, I need, I saw, um” he rests his forehead on the door, hands gripping Duck’s hips, “Barclay and Indrid making use of their rare chance at privacy.”

“Uh huh” Duck kisses along his jaw, “and here I’ve been wonderin how to get you back into my bed since that night in Port Royal, when it turns out I just need to find some mermen and pay ‘em to fuck in front of you.”

“It’s not just that” Joseph looks down at him earnestly, “it’s you too. It’s so hard to keep my hands to myself, to maintain decorum and poise and not beg for your kisses every minute we’re at work. Seeing them together snapped the rest of my control, I need release but more than that I need you.”

“Right here, darlin” Duck pulls him down into a kiss, leaves a trail of them across his face, “so show me just how much you need me.”

He thuds to his knees, the two of them tugging and tossing at clothing until Duck’s legs are bare and Joseph can bury his face between them. He loves doing this, loves feeling enveloped by the perfection that’s Duck;s body. His hands grope and circle, relishing the muscle and fat beneath his hands as Duck holds him by the hair and tells him how good it feels, how well he’s doing, the grip tightening the closer his orgasm gets, until Joseph can barely breathe from how hard he’s pressed against him.

He barely gets a chance to kiss his thigh in thanks before Duck hauls him up by his coat to kiss and spin him to the nearest bed. Black hair streaked with grey falls across green eyes as Duck grins down at him.

“My turn.”

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Barclay can’t look at Indrid without blushing; it’d been so long since they fucked and he’d forgotten just how nice it felt, how teasing and playful Indrid was as a mate. Case in point: as their kisses deepened, he whispered in Barclay’s ear that Joseph had seen them and was, as he spoke, pawing Duck in their room. Barclay moaned at the words and Indrid laughed, spread his side fins, and leapt into Barclay’s tank to lick and bite at the sensitive patch of tail that hid his cock.

“My, my dearest, it seems Joseph is skilled with his tongue as well. Perhaps if you ask nicely we will use our mouths on you at the same time.”

Indrid is currently sighing as Duck combs his hair. Barclay takes a moment to watch the scene unfold: Indrid’s made no secret of his attraction to Duck (or Joseph for that matter), and Barclay likes seeing his friend happy, likes the way Duck touches him with the tenderness he deserves but will often deny himself.

Joseph opens the door and calls, “Duck? Hayes wants to speak with us.”

The human departs and Indrid blows a kiss when his back is turned, then winks at Barclay. Barclay is about to ask if they have time to trade kisses of their own when Indrid freezes.

“Oh no.”

Indrid cocks his head and Barclay follows suit, voices reaching him from the hall.

“Captain Hayes, I must object to this plan. We can get all the information we need from my interviews with Barclay and Indrid, there’s no need to take them away from their home.”

“This is not about information, Mr. Stern. The company that funded this mission did so in the hopes that we would return with mermaids to sell. Which we have, and the two them alone will make not only the company but all of us rich men indeed.”

“Who gives a damn about riches? They ain’t fuckin treasure to be traded.”

“Mr. Newton-”

“Duck’s right, this is completely inhumane. If I’d known this was your goal, I’d never have agreed to this voyage.”

“The decision is final. And I’d advise you both to tread carefully from how you speak to me from here on; men of science or no, this is my ship, and what I say is the law.”

Indrid flicks his tail, swimming back and forth in agitation as Barclay curls his arms around himself; he doesn’t want to be taken away from home, and he certainly doesn’t want to be someone’s prized possession. Worse, Joseph doesn’t return, and so there’s no one to comfort him as he worries and Indrid sorts through unhelpful futures.

He’s half-asleep when the door opens, gasps as a hand touches his shoulder.

“Can you heave yourself out of the tank?” Joseph whispers

Barclay nods, pushes himself up, out, and then into the human’s embrace. Across from him, Duck manages to carry Indrid in his arms on the first try.

“What are you doing?”

Joseph touches his face, “I promised you that you’d get to go free. I keep my promises.”

With that they struggle out the door and up stairs, Indrid helping them determine when the coast is clear to reach the edge of the deck. He’s already dizzy, breath coming in gasps. Indrid wastes no time, launches himself into the sea with a graceful splash.

“What, what will happen to you?”

“It doesn’t matter.” Joseph smiles sadly. Barclay kisses him to the thunder of footsteps, then falls into the sea.

The last thing he hears is Duck muttering, “Well...fuck.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------

“Pirates would have at least given us a pistol.” Joseph lays on his back in the sand as Duck tosses rocks into the sea, The Washington disappearing on the horizon.

“Yeah. That’s why Hayes ain’t one; he’d have to be too damn nice.”

Joseph chuckles, “True.”

Duck’s certain this is not even remotely what was supposed to happen, and it’s certainly not what either of them expected. Flogging, being thrown in the brig, brought up on charges when they arrived home all crossed their minds. Not being marooned on a small, deserted island with only the clothes on their backs.

He doesn’t regret his choice. Joe doesn’t either. All the same, they spend a few hours on the beach bemoaning their fate or silently considering how to mitigate it. By evening, they determine it could be far worse. They’re study of the plants and animals of the region means they know what’s edible and what’s poisonous, there are fish in the shallows and a small spring hidden in the rocks and trees towards the center of the island. Duck suggests building signal fires when they can in case other ships are near, and they set up a rough lean-to as shelter from the sun. They spend the next few days figuring out how to survive, and Duck discovers just how charming Joe looks when he’s unshaven.

(His budding facial hair also leads to the discovery that Duck;s thighs are incredibly ticklish).

They’re alright for now. Duck’s just worried about how long their luck will hold.

----------------------------------------------------

Joseph is making a new spear, eyeing the storm clouds on the horizon, when Duck’s voice catches his attention.

“Uh, you might not wanna wade out just yet. Looks like there’s a shark.” The other man points to a dark fin sticking slicing the water.

“That doesn’t look like-”

“AHJESUS” Duck is knocked back onto the sand by shape with silvery fins and hair. His further commentary on the matter is cut off by Indrid kissing him, tail wiggling happily as he does.

“I did not get to do that when we fled, there was no time, but oh how I wanted to.”

“Seriously, he kept saying I was smart to kiss you when I could.” Barclay’s entrance onto the beach is more graceful, using the surf to slide up the sand and settle at Joseph's feet.

“Oh yes, that reminds me” Indrid rolls off Duck, grabs Joseph’s shirt, and pulls him down into a kiss.

“Y’all hunt us down just for some kisses?” Duck scoots over to join them, draping an arm over Indrid.

“Nope. When Indrid’s visions showed us what they were gonna do to you, we knew we had to come get you. You, you’re here because you saved us-”

“It was the right thing to do” Joseph strokes the dark brown of his hair as Barclay rests his head on his stomach/

“And neither of us could stand the thought of losing you, especially not like this.”

“We would have arrived sooner, but we had to make arrangements for your rescue and get permission from the mer whose territory we’re technically in.

“Fascinating. Are there borders, or identification or-”

“All in good time” Indrid purrs, nipping his ear. He shudders down to his toes as Barclay begins kissing his hips and belly.

“Like the way you think, ‘Drid.”

“You will like how I do other things as well. Now come here” Indrid pulls Duck into his arms as Barclay crawls up Joseph’s body to kiss him properly. There’s salt on his lips, sweetness on his tongue, and Joseph sighs as he wraps his legs around the smooth, cool texture of his tail. Barclay smiles into the kiss, rolls his hips as Joseph teases his fingers up and down his sides.

“I missed you so much.” Barclay murmurs, “nights aren’t the same without you keeping me company.”

“I missed you too.” He nudges his hips up, letting the mer know he’s heading in the right direction.

“Holyfuck, you have-”

“Two, yes, is that not what humans have?” Indrid cocks his head at Duck.

Joseph hides a smile, “See, Duck, I’m not the only one who finds you irresistible.”

“That and when Indrid gets going, he gets going fast.” Barclay adds. Indrid flicks water at him with his tail.

“No kiddin. Joe, you gotta see this.” Duck climbs off Indrid, revealing two cocks protruding from the upper part of his tail. Joseph’s brain fails to supply any thoughts other than yes

Indrid preens under the attention, lazily stroking one shaft, “Are you all going to just gawk at me, or will one of you come and attend to the situation?”

“May, um, may I?” Joseph looks between the three of them, unsure whose permission he’s asking or what he’s asking it for.

“Heh, oughta tell you two that Joe needs someone to order him around in bed.” Duck smirks as he crawls through the surf to kiss Joseph’s shoulders.

“Is that so? In that case, be a good human and come ride my cock.” Indrid gestures to said cock with a flourish.

“But I was gonna go down on him.” Barclay mock pouts.

“We can do both at once. If he will hurry up and get his trousers off. Honestly, why do humans insist on so much clothing?”

“Because our dicks don’t stay nice and hidden until we need ‘em.” Duck disrobes along with Joseph.

Red eyes rove across Duck hungrily, “I see. A lovely sight all the same. Now Joseph, come face away from me.”

He straddles Indrid’s hips on shaking knees, warm sand the perfect counterpoint to cool scales.

“Do not worry about taking both, my foresight suggests it will be too much right now. AHhnnn yes” he wriggles when Joseph strokes the shaft, bringing it into position.

“The ridges are intriguing.” They also feel incredible on his hand, and he rushes to feel them inside him.

“Do humans not have those either? Honestly, what do you haveAHahhhoh, oh nevermind, oh you’re so tight and warm, oh this is wonderful, Barclay, you have to try this.” The ridged cock bumps and thrusts into him, and Joseph tips his head back to moan.

“I will. Got other things to do right now.” Barclay lays along Indrid’s tail, kissing both it and Joseph's legs before closing his lips around Joseph’s swollen cock.

“Lord, ohlord that’s good, Barclay, Indrid, fuckplease.”

“Please what, Joseph?” Indrid thrusts more roughly.

“Just please, please don’t stop, it’s incredible, you both are.” His mind is going blank, his whole being thrumming with a singular desire; to be good, to filled and used and wanted.

“Fuck, Joe” Duck paints kisses along his back and shoulder, “you look damn good like this, takin it two ways at once.”

He pets Duck’s thigh, kisses him messily “You, someone should take care of you.”

“Yes they should” Indrid “come, sweet one, let me show you what I can do with my tongue.”

“Hell yeah” Duck scrambles away, and a moment later his moans fill the air, underscored by Indrid’s pleased laughter.

Barclay hums, making Joseph jolt and squirm. The merman pulls back, winks at him, then drags his tongue along the cock not buried to the hilt in the human.

“MMMPHHmmmmmm” Indrid’s garbled shout of delight makes the other three laugh.

“Jesusfuck, Barclay can you do that again, his mouth gets even better when you do.”

Barclay obliges and another moaning trill washes over the beach.

“God, it’s so fucking hot, watching him fuck you, wanna see it everyday” Barclay dives back down and soon Joseph’s orgasm crashes into him, his whole body twitching as pleasure overwhelms his nerves. Behind him, Duck lets out the singularly charming groan he always makes when he cums. Indrid is close behind him, spilling sticky and cool inside Joseph and across his thighs and Barclays chest. The other mer growls, roughly pulling Joseph off or Indrid and into the sand with him, the particles burning his knees as the merman grinds him roughly back and forth across his cock, not pushing in but not needing to, cumming in a few short seconds with a howl of ecstasy.

They rearrange themselves, panting, so the mers are mostly in the surf and the humans mostly on the sand, he and Duck pulling their clothes back on to avoid sunburns in the worst possible places.

“That was exquisite” Indrid sighs, resting between the humans with his silver tail draped across Barclay’s dark one.

“No kiddin.”

“And we finished not a moment too soon.” Indrid points out to sea.

Rounding the side of the island is a small sailing boat bearing the words Amnesty.

“Man, I cannot wait to get us all home” Barclay smiles, kissing Joseph’s hand.

The human leans down and kisses him back, “Me neither.”

#OT4: Government Men and Their Cryptid Boyfriends #Indruck #agent stern/barclay #duck newton/agent stern #trans agent stern #trans duck newton #mermay fills #mermay

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talldarkandroguesome · 3 years ago

Text

5th of Frostfall, Tirdas

Finally we came to place where Seryn looked about. Perhaps it was the towering stones that marked the way for her, but we turned sharply and began our way along the Foyada, taking one of the branches just a ways beyond.

I do not wish to disclose any further details, that is already too much to identify the secret, sacred path. I shall say no more of it.

Our journey was slowed significantly by the increase in volcanic activity under our feet. It was bad enough that we had to stop and watch for falling stones. At one point Seryn actually made a shield, protecting us from a bolder that rolled down the side of the mountain. It was clear that the activity was increasing. It was as Tel and the others had warned. It was clear that most animals had sensed the increase themselves, for there was little animal life to be found anywhere near our path, save for the occasional shadow of a passing cliff strider.

I must say, Seryn has a keen ability to avoid cliff striders , something I asked her about as the light began to fade around us. She laughed and told me that perhaps it was that they were drawn to my scent of my incessant talking. I gasped, surprised at such words, but she quickly dissolved into a giggle and I found myself caught completely unexpected in her jest. I laughed myself, so surprised by the turn and I was glad for the break in what had been a lull in conversation as we walked.

After that, she was more jovial. At least until our upward climb drew near to where there appeared to be a cave.

Above, we could hear the wise woman shouting for someone to stay back.

We ran to find her fending off some skafin, of all fetching things! We defeated them with little issue and ran to the wise woman’s side, checking that she was alright.

She told us she was, that Azura had protected her until we arrived, just as predicted. I looked at Seryn, but she just smiled at me. I do not know if she was aware of the secret or if she simply was glad that we were where we were supposed to be.

Then the wise woman stopped, as though hearing something, so Seryn and I kept silent. Then she spoke, as if someone else were there and said she understood. I realized then who she was talking to as soon as she said, my Lady.

When she turned to me and said I should follow her, I felt my face flush in anticipation, my heart racing. As we headed towards the mouth of the cavern, the wise woman told me that the Queen of the Night Sky asked that I help the wise woman in coming to the correct decision regarding a claim. I could hardly believe my ears.

I asked, trying to contain my excitement, if it was regarding Chodala’s claim to be the Nerevarine. She told me I was correct and that clearly my insight as a diplomat would be needed. Although the Red Exiles had been convinced of Chodala’s claim, the wise woman said she was far more uncertain. But there was more she had to consider, for she feared that if she opposed him there would come retribution from the Red Exiles that could well harm all the Velothi in Ald’ruhn, and possibly beyond as well.

As we entered the cave, I was struck by the fact that this was a far more ornate shrine. Instead of the usual statue of Azura, stood with Her arms spread wide and the moon and star sitting upon each palm, this statue had Her seated, Her hands together, palms up, held downward. She appeared more to be offering than Her usual show of radiance. Her face appeared serene and kind. Besides Her were two statues of moon and star. At Her one knee, was a small pond, besides which was an altar covered with offerings.

I pulled myself from the awe that overcame me, I had a duty. A sacred one at that. So I asked the wise woman about her options. We spoke of different outcomes that could come from her decision. Finally, we agreed upon an option that would be the most beneficial, it would stop Chodala while allowing the wise woman to remain impartial. It might have consequences for me, but I assured her that I would be far happier having violence directed towards one House mer, than to risk harm coming to her people.

So she explained that if I could find from the spirits of the failed incarnates what brought about their failure, then those flaws could be compared to Chodala’s ambitions. It would be enough to prove that he was headed towards his own doom. His failure. Then she would be allowed to refute him.

I was thrilled and a bit overwhelmed by everything happening around me. Azura had spoken of me. I was in a sacred shrine, the likes of which I had never seen or heard of. I was going to be asked to speak with the failed incarnations of Nerevar, something I only knew a little about. I was going to be present to dispute an Ashkhan’s claim at Nerevarine. There was so much! It was unreal. I was in this pivotal moment in history. Only, instead of simply trying to help the hero of the story to reach the final stage to defeat evil, here I was actually a player in the outcome of history!

Despite Naryu’s jabs about my being hero, I have never felt that was a role designed for me. Yet, here I was, stepping into a place where likely no one outside of the wise women who maintained the shrine, ever entered. And Azura had asked me to do so.

Surreal is the only word I can think of that begins to describe the feeling.

The wise woman showed me how to summon the spirits and then bade me return to Ald’ruhn when I was done, for she needed to be there when Chodala returned from his meditations. Then she left me to do as I was told.

Making sure to carefully follow every instruction, I summoned the spirits of those thought to be Lord Nerevar’s reincarnations. Then, one by one, I saw the ethereal images of each of those great Velothi heroes who had claimed to be the Nerevarine before, rise up from where they had been laid to rest around Azura’s statue.

I took up ink, quill, and parchment, and I wrote down all that they said. Their stories, in their own words. I made sure to spare no details, writing as fast as I could, even when my hand cramped and my finger tips grew numb. This was far too important to let discomfort stop me.

I thanked each of them for their wisdom. I felt satisfied that I would be able to present these sacred stories, wisdom from those who had experienced it themselves, before the wise woman and Chodala. Perhaps Chodala would even see the folly of his ways and be convinced to continue on his great path in a way more befitting a unifier.

As I made to leave, a voice stopped me.

It was Azura, calling me to speak with Her.

I knelt before the great statue and kowtowed before it. I felt warmth and comfort from Her voice. The void where my soul once lay, instantly filled.

She offered me council before I went to refute Chodala’s claim. Offered me the wisdom in how best to present what I had learned and pressed upon me the importance of succeeding in this endeavor. Further, She told me that it was the staff that was making Chodala so bold and reckless and to prevent further destruction, he must be made to part with with. That he is not the Nerevarine.

That last part could leave no doubt. Chodala was clearly being led astray by the power in the staff. I had wondered by who or what, until I recalled the Skafin who attacked the wise woman. Clearly Chodala had made a deal with the Prince of Bargains. It was something to consider as we took our next steps. Perhaps he could be convinced that he should not try using Daedric pacts to fulfill his ambitions.

Before I left, Azura told me that I should assist her champion, which of course I agreed to. She named Seryn as that mer, a friend to all the Velothi people. I kowtowed again, pressing my forehead upon the cool ground. I swore that I would do so and that I would protect her, even should it cost me several lives.

I felt a pleased feeling all around me and my heart swelled with joy.

Then the radiating feeling began to dim and fade, until I was left alone in the cavern.

As I raised my head, the cavern was dimmer that before and I felt wetness streak my face. As I touched my cheeks, I felt tears. I felt the blessing that was given to me. And I knew my task.

I headed out of the cave and found Seryn waiting for me. She was deep in meditation, but looked up as I approached. She asked me if I had found what we needed. I said that I had and as the moons rose in the sky, I read the words of each of the three failed incarnates to her.

She thought in silence after I had finished. I remained beside her, content in knowing that I had a part to play. Seryn was going to succeed. She would convince her brother with evidence he could not deny. He would be forced to see reason. Then we could explain the gravity of consequence that came with his staff, a consequence that threatened the very people he wanted to unite. If Vivec’s power got too low, Red Mountain would certainly erupt, killing everyone that lived near, Velothi and Housemer alike.

Seryn spoke up and said she would need to sleep on everything and plan our next move. I told her I was hers to command, she only needed to say the word.

She laughed and told me that she was another diplomat, not the Ashkhan. I bowed and played her servant as we stood and gathered our things. I wonder if she understands how truly amazing she is? Does she know yet that she is Azura’s chosen?

It is not my place to say. If she does not know now, she will soon. I am sure of that.

We teleported back to Ald’ruhn and Seryn retired for the night. Normally I would go and sit with the rest of the tribe and drink and sing and enjoy the company, but I felt the weight of what was to come and decided that sleep would be a better use of time.

I only hope that we help Chodala to see wisdom.

#ESO #TES #RP #Dunmer #Elder Scrolls Online #The Elder Scrolls

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stellar-alley · 4 years ago

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Of Scales and Sea Glass

•Chapter 3•

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

(Summary: Eddie and his merman’s relationship evolves with the mer’s new found voice.)

Also shout out to @ambitiousskychild on tumblr for being my beta!

Eddie’s eyes went as wide as the full moon, his eyebrows had practically sky rocketed and his jaw hit the floor.

When he finally gathered up the energy to speak, he couldn’t help the tone of his voice, it wasn't really angry…. It was just loud, “What the fuck! You kiss me and now you can speak?”

“Of course I can speak! Everyone can,” he shot back, his own voice growing louder to match Eddie’s.

“But you had to kiss me to do it?”

“Uh- yeah, I need saliva for the spell to work,” the merman said in a ‘well duh’ tone.

“SPELL!?” Eddie’s stomach dropped.

“Yeah! How do you think I just magically learned human-” But before the merman could continue, Eddie got to his feet.

“I-I, I can’t do this,” he stammered. He could barely look at the fish in his tub, he rushed out of the bathroom, practically tripping as he tried to stand.

“Oh come on cute ass!” He called after Eddie.

Eddie hesitated as he stood at the top of the stairs, without missing a beat he flipped the fish off and left the house. He needed to get as far away from that thing as he could.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUck. fuCK. FUCK!

The only coherent thought he could create inside his head.

It was a little ironic that he ended up standing on the beach when he wanted to escape his- the merman.

His knees wobbled from beneath him, causing him to take a seat on the warm sand.

He kissed me.

Eddie couldn’t deny that he did kinda enjoy it. The way their lips moved, it was as if they were on the same wavelength, two jigsaw pieces finally clicked together. And Eddie hated it.

He hated how much he enjoyed the kiss, he hated how much he’s grown used to his trashmouth, he hated how cute he was. What he hated most was that one day he’d have to go back into the ocean, to his home. The idea made Eddie sick to his stomach, and he knew why. As much as he hated to admit it, he had developed a crush on the scaly creature. It was just something about the way that Eddie was able to be himself when he was with the mer, how they made eachother laugh and smile. Even if it couldn’t talk! Eddie always felt at home when they were together, even if they were just sitting in silence. There was nowhere else he’d rather be.

After his realization struck, that’s when he noticed the hot tears that had begun to stream down his face. And it was all because he was crushing on a creature of the sea…

It took him a while, maybe even hours, to fully compose himself, but he did. When he did he tried so hard to think of things on the brighter side.

“Okay… So it- he can talk. That’s great! We kissed, that’s great. Sure it felt like literal heaven on earth but that’s fine. It’s all fine. Fuck, well at least I can fianlly find out his goddamn name,” Eddie chuckled at that last bit.

He still sat on the beach when his eyes finally returned to their normal look, after crying. His hands had found their place in the sand by his side, mindlessly digging and tossing the sand. He stopped when he felt something hard in his grasp. He glanced to the side and saw something sticking out of the sand where his hand had just been. Eddie picked it up and held it up. The sun shined down on the small piece of sea glass Eddie held.

The stone brought a smile to his face and a memory to mind. He remembered the mer’s glasses, how their lenses were made out of some sort of sea glass, how eager the mer was to finally see the world, see Eddie.

“Scales and sea glass,” Eddie smiled and pocketed the stone, finally ready to go back inside.

Eddie walked with his back straight and his chin high, he marched into his house and up the stairs into the bathroom. The merman stirred, turning to watch as the human stopped in front of the tub.

“Hi, I’m Eddie Kaspbrak.” He introduced himself and stuck his hand out. He mimicked the fish and made a little grabbing motion with his fingers. He smiled halfheartedly. “Give me your hand. It’s how us- humans introduce ourselves.”

The merman silently raised his hand out of the water and placed it inside Eddie’s. It was a little awkward with the webbed fingers and the claws, but it was still something.

“I’m Richie. Richie Tozier.” The merman, Richie, smiled, glad to see his human didn’t look completely mortified like he did before.

Eddie smiled, Richie Tozier, I like the sound of that.

The next few days were interesting. Now everyday when Eddie walked into the bathroom he was greeted by his merman, Richie, who he learned had a love for talking, and had a trashmouth, of course. Constantly joking about fucking moms and doing crack (how did he know about cracK? Eddie will never know). Although they fell into a groove, that was their constant bickering, they also began subtle flirting with each other, something Eddie wasn't sure if Richie meant in a platonic way, or if he shared the same feelings that Eddie did.

“Okay so you’re telling me that this kid- Peter?” Richie asks.

“Peter,” Eddie confirmed, a ghost smile on his lips.

“So Peter gets bits by a tiny tiny spider and suddenly he gets powers? How the hell does that work?” Richie had his chin resting on the edge of the tub, looking down at the comic book Eddie was reading for him.

Eddie laughed, something he seems to be doing a lot of now that Richie can talk, “How the hell am I supposed to know? It’s like you and your powers-” Eddie ducked his head, raised his hand and flicked Richie’s forehead, “Aqua man,” he smirked.

“Oh I am so not Aquaman. I’m more of a…. Batman, ya know? Cool and mysterious,” Richie smiled into the distance.

Eddie laughed, like hard.

“HEY! I can be mysterious! I was a myth to your kind for the longest fucking time,” Richie nodded his head proudly.

“No, you jackass. You’re so not cool.” Eddie looked over at Richie, he blushed when he saw Richie was already staring at him.

“Fuck I hate this stuff,” Eddie almost gagged as he shoved another mussel into his mouth.

“Then why do you eat it?” Richie asked, mouth full of fish. Eddie grimaced slightly then swallowed the food in his mouth.

“‘Cause I gotta start eating fish at one fucking point,” Eddie twirled another forkfull of pasta, shoving it in his mouth, then putting a couple mussels in there as well, at least if he mixed it up then he wouldn’t taste them as much.

With Eddie buying so much fish for Richie (plus Richie gave him hell for not liking fish), he decided he might as well try to get accustomed to it as well. So he started off small, mixing seafood into his normal meals and such, tonight was pasta and mussels in a white wine sauce. Eddie had learned that he was actually a pretty good cook.

“What even is that?” Richie gestured to the pasta with a clawed finger.

Eddie twirled another forkful, added a mussel then held it out to Richie. The mer smiled at the gesture and opened his mouth. He chewed, swallowed and smiled.

“Damn, Eds! That’s good!” Richie hollered.

“How many times do I have to tell you-” Eddie started.

“Don’t call me Eds, I’m too cute for my own good… blah, blah, blah” Richie mimicked Eddie’s voice. The compliment sent a warm feeling through Eddie’s chest as he glanced away.

“It’s spaghetti by the way,” Eddie said shyly.

Richie cocked an eyebrow, “Spajetti?”.

“Spa-get-ti” Eddie giggled as he over pronounced the word.

“Spaghetti?” Richie asked.

“Spaghetti.” Eddie confirmed, a small proud smile on his lips.

“Eddie Spaghetti?” Richie inquired, eyebrows raised.

Eddie’s eyes went wide, “No, no, no,noooo. Please don’t start calling me that,” Eddie begged, but there’s no sorrow in his voice, just pure amusement.

“Whatever you say Spagheds,” Richie winked.

“God I hate you,” Eddie laughed.

Richie let out a little happy huff of air through his nose as his gaze fell on Eddie, “I hate you too”.

Richie’s life changed drastically the day he got caught up in that storm and washed up inside of Eddie’s pool. Sure it was a big change from what he was usually used to, which was aimlessly floating around the ocean, but now he got to aimlessly spend his days inside of a cute boy’s bath tub. And he’s really cute. Cute, cute, cute…

The morning light came in through the bathroom window, directly onto Richie’s face. His eyes fluttered open, immediately scanning his blurry surroundings.

Shit, glasses.

Richie leaned over the side of the tub and aimlessly felt around for his glasses which he always took off before he fell asleep, in fear of them somehow breaking in his sleep. His fingers brushed over the glasses, so he flicked his fingers and got his claws out, which gave his fingers a little bit more length. With that, he was able to slide his glasses closer to him. He grabbed them and put them on. The world cleared around him. He let out a sigh as he moved his hands to rest behind his head with his elbows out. He watched the morning sunlight dance over his blue scales, the light reflected onto the ceiling, creating a trippy design on the bathroom ceiling.

Richie’s head snapped to the side when he heard the door creak open, and in walked a very tired-looking Eddie.

“Good morning, my dearest Eddie, and how’s thy doing on this fine morning?” Richie asked in a british accent. Eddie took a seat on the closet toilet.

“Morning Trashmouth,” Eddie smirked as he sat down beside him on the floor instead of the toilet (it was something Eddie had started to do more ad Richie loved it). Eddie glanced over at Richie, fatigue still glazed over his eyes, his hair all disheveled. “I barely got any sleep, again,” Eddie sighed and rubbed his temples.

“Nightmares?” This was something Richie had grown used to, Eddie's nightmares usually revolved around his parents’ death, or the ocean.

Richie reached out (his claws retracted) and pushed a loose strand of golden brown hair behind Eddie’s ear. He left his hand cupping Eddie’s cheek. Eddie’s hand soon drifted up to rest upon the mer’s. He leaned into Richie’s touch.

“Wanna talk about it?” Richie asked, comforting Eddie.

“No… Rich, it's the same as always,” Eddie looked over at Richie, just the sight of his merman made Eddie's chest warm and his palms all sweaty.

“What if, one day, we go out to the beach and I-I can try to help you swim?” Richie knew it was a crazy idea, he wasn't even sure how Eddie would get him there, but he knew one day he'd have to go back. He didn't like thinking about the day he'd have to leave Eddie. So he was determined to make every moment count. Richie also couldn't stand to see Eddie so terrified of the wafer, so he might as well try to help.

Eddie’s eyes went wide for a second, “Me? In the water? Remember last time that happened?” The two recalled the first day they met, when Eddie fell into the pool, and Richie saved him.

“We’ll take it slow,” Richie assured. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Eddie let out a little chuckle, he really liked how much Richie cared for him, it made him feel safe. “Well, until then, how does breakfast sound?” Eddie slowly pulled Richie’s hand off of his cheek, but kept holding on until he stood.

“Sounds great,” Richie grinned and winked as Eddie left to go get the food.

The two ate together and talked like usual. Eddie explained his plans for the day ahead. His friend Mike had something, called a cat? Richie wasn't sure what that was but apparently it had babies and Eddie and his group were going to see them. Richie wasn't too sure what was gonna happen, but Eddie seemed excited, so he was happy.

The bell rang throughout the house, Eddie had told him how it meant someone was at his front door. “Shit, that’s Bill. I gotta go Rich, see you later?” He asked even though he knew the answer. He grabbed the plates and containers and stood to leave.

“I won’t be going anywhere,” Richie smirked, he blew Eddie a kiss before the human left.

The merman knew it was stupid to crush on a human. Everyone always told him how humans were sinister monsters who’d skin him and eat him, or rip off his tail and leave him to die. But everything changed when he met Eddie. His human was sweet and gentle, sure a little worrisome and asthmatic, but he cared for Richie, more than anyone ever has before. So of course it was easy to fall for him, especially since he was so cute. I mean, come on! Look at him, that little face. And his cute ass!

When Eddie was gone, Richie tried his best to keep himself entertained. Sometimes he’d talk to Goldy, but that fish was pretty quiet and he found Richie annoying. He’d read the comics Eddie left him, well it was more Richie just admiring the pictures as he had yet to understand human writing. Eddie would also leave the little music player for Richie to use and tune to his pleasure, a radio was it? Whatever it was, Richie liked the music, and after a couple days he began to recognize the songs and then when he heard a song he knew he’d get all excited and try to sing along. After he’d usually fool around with his powers, play with the water and stuff without making too much of a mess. But the best part of any day was always when Eddie returned home to him.

“Edwardo is that you?” Richie called out to Eddie.

“No it’s a burglar! Yes of course it’s me!” Richie could hear the smile in Eddie’s voice as he bounded up the stairs.

“Hey Eds,” Richie smiled, relieved to see him again.

“Hey yourself, Trashmouth” Eddie entered the bathroom, ruffled Richie’s hair then took a seat on the floor beside him.

“How were the tittens?” Richie asked excitedly.

Eddie giggled. “You mean Kittens?”.

“What now?” Richie’s brow furrowed.

“Kittens, I went to go see baby cats today, here, look,” Eddie whipped out his phone and showed Richie some pics of the babies.

“So you can take uh-” Richie waved his hand around, grasping for the right word, “Photos? Photos with that?” he asked.

“Yeah, er-here” Eddie clicked a couple things then turned the phone to Richie.

“Woah,” Richie gaped as he stared at himself in the selfie cam. “Take photos of me!” He begged happily.

Eddie rolled his eyes playfully as Richie struck a pose. “You’re such a drama queen.” He giggled as he snapped a couple pics. Eddie took enough photos so just started a video.

“I know right?” Richie smirked and magically flicked some water at Eddie.

“Hey!” he giggled. Eddie turned the camera around so he could see himself as he sat back down beside Richie. “Say hi,” he suggested as Richie leaned forward.

“Hey guys, Richie Tozier here,” Richie announced in a TV announcer voice. “Here with me today is the adorable Edwardo Kaspbrak.” He pinched Eddie’s cheek.

Eddie swatted his hand away, “That’s not my name dickwad,” he mused.

“I know but you love it so much,” Richie smirked.

“I really don’t.”

“But I know what you do like,” Richie claimed and kissed Eddie’s cheek.

The sudden show of affection nearly caused Eddie to drop his phone. His heart was racing and his stomach was full of butterflies. He ended the video and slid the phone back into his pocket.

“Ew gross, fish germs.” He tried to hide his embarrassment as he wiped his cheek with the back of his hand.

“Oh come on Eddie, you love me,” Richie dragged out the O.

Eddie stood up and glanced out the door, quickly he changed the subject. “You hungry for some dinner? I can make you some pasta if you want?” he asked.

“The only pasta I need is you, Spaghetti,” Richie smiled happily.

“God, you’re such a sap,” Eddie sighed as he walked out of the room.

“Ha! I don’t even know what sap means!” Richie called out after Eddie.

Eddie made the same pasata he had from a couple nights ago. Though he wasn't the biggest fan of the mussels, he did enjoy the white sauce it was in. He made the pasta and put his on a plate, then added some more fish to Richie’s and put it in a bowl.

They ate dinner together and joked around like usual. When the sky grew dark and the moon came out, Eddie let out a yawn.

“Well, that’s my cue. I’m gonna go to bed,” Eddie said, stretching.

“Okay,” Richie looked a little disappointed, even though he too was about to fall asleep. He never seemed to get enough time with Eddie.

“Goodnight trashmouth,” Eddie leaned over and kissed Richie’s forehead. The gesture acted as a way of payback for the little stunt Richie pulled during that video. Eddie could visibly see Richie blush as he looked up at him with those big blue eyes.

“Goodnight Eds.”

“That’s not my name!” Eddie smirked, turning to leave.

“Wait-Eds, I’ve been meaning to ask, what does that button do?” Richie pointed to a small red button above the main water controls of the tub.

Eddie yawned and waved his hand around, “It doesn't matter, Rich. Just please don’t touch it…. Goodnight.”

Richie stared at the doorway as he watched Eddie leave. Well shit, now i’ve gotta test it out. Richie’s mind was slipping in and out of sleep as he poked the button with the tip of his tail fin. Sadly sleep took him away before he could see what it did.

Word Count: 3072

AH GUYS I ADORED THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH! Richie and Eddie are just so cute and chaotic. But damn y'all aren't even ready to see what happens next chapter OMG. On that note, I will see all of you next monday where you find out what the red button does. Until then... So Long and Goodnight

[Taglist]

@richietoaster @s-onora @that-weird-girl-blog @beproudtozier @ghostnebula @bellarosewrites @s-s-georgie @lermanslogan @iamcupcakefrosting @madidraw @gazebobullshit @thoughtfullyyoungduck @aangzukos @ambitiousskychild @reddieonwheels @breadheadscorpius @opinions-you-didnt-ask-for @faz-se

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saintheartwing · 4 years ago

Text

Undertales of Friendship: Befriend the Man Who Speaks in Hands

Whilst Princess Luna and Fluttershy had been checking in on Frisk, Alphys was checking in on the local school where Toriel and Undyne were teaching. With sunny skies casting soft rays of sunlight down onto the grassy fields around the red building, Alphys hung back, watching as Undyne the Mer-Woman did a few flexes of her scaly muscles, giving the kids a big, fanged grin. Her red ponytail flicked back and forth in the wind as Toriel stood nearby, paws clasped together as she stood by Ms. Cheerilee, Undyne holding up an arm and flexing. "Alright, lil' fillies! You know why you're here? Cuz it's gym class day and that means you get ME. And you know what we're gonna do?"

"No, but I got a feeling you're about to tell us." Diamond Tiara remarked, the pink-furred little filly cringing slightly as Undyne gave her a slight stink eye with her one good eye.

"You bet your flank I am! It's time for fifty laps around the school yard, hollering about how great we are!" The yellow-eyed monster proclaimed. "We're gonna!" She roared, flexing. "GET!" Another flex. "BUFF!"

"More like "fluff"." Diamond Tiara sighed as she looked down at her stubby little hooves, hanging her head as the other kids glanced at each other, then shrugged, deciding that hey, they like yelling! Why not?

"ROCK SOLID, BABY!" Undyne cried out dramatically, flexing her arms some more as the kids began running around the school yard, hair whipping through the air as the wind blew, the part-time gym teacher and part time royal-guard-member smiling in delight as Toriel giggled. "Ahhh. You were right, Tori. Nothing's more satisfying than leaving an impact on a child's life." She reasoned. "Especially when you can do that by bench-pressing them."

"I am amazed at how quickly you connected to them." Ms. Cheerilee said with a happy smile, nodding her head in agreement as Toriel nodded as well. "You're clearly a natural gym teacher."

"Well, it's my job as the current Head of Asgore's Royal Guard to decide what weenies get into the guard. Drilling them into shape! Kicking butt, taking names! The louder I yell, the more they'll learn!" She laughed. "Well, actually, it's really about the stick." She said, wagging a clawed finger in the air. "I'm a very carrot and stick approach...though mostly 80% stick."

"When do you use the carrot?" Cheerilee inquired.

"When I'm cooking, of course." Undyne remarked cheerily. "Nah, I'm almost all stick there too! I use the carrot when I can tell a student isn't ready for the full treatment. Papyrus used to get the carrot a lot." She added with a sigh. "He was just too...nice...to be in the royal guard. But now it's good to see that he's unlocked his full potential by focusing his gifts! Now..." Undyne struck a pose. "To go join the kids! Hup hup hup!" She took off running, Toriel giggling a little as she and Cheerilee turned, seeing Alphys slightly hiding behind a nearby bush.

"Oh, Alphys, why are you hiding?"

"Sorry. Force of habit." The yellow-scaled, dinosaur-esque monster nervously remarked with a small smile. "I'll go talk to her after she's done. But I also wanted to see you too, Ms. Toriel. How have you been?"

"I've thoroughly enjoyed teaching here for the ponies in Equestria." Toriel admitted with a big smile. "It's always heartening to see others willing to learn what I have to impart, and I've worked out an exhaustive curriculum with Cheerilee. Tomorrow the children will be learning about mathematics. Tragically, many of them find it boring, so I devised a way to get them interested."

"How?"

Toriel whipped out a basket of scones, grinning from fuzzy ear to fuzzy ear, Cheerilee clasping her hooves together in delight. "I have about...thirty scones. I think it's a simple matter of division and subtraction! With the end result naturally becoming zero." She laughed, Alphys smiling in agreement as Cheerilee trotted off to go join Undyne in the laps. It was FUN to run around, hooting about how great you were. However, the good times were soon over as a very-serious-looking Princess Luna descended from the skies, Fluttershy by her side as they quickly raced over to Alphys, Toriel staring in surprise. "Oh! Your majesty."

"Your majesty." Princess Luna responded in turn with a calm nod back.

"Oh, I'm not the queen anymore." Toriel remarked with a shake of her head. "Those days are behind me, I believe. But you look as though you've seen a ghost. Whatever is the matter?"

Fluttershy tapped her hooves together, head slightly bowed, pink mane sloughed down. "Um...we think that an imposter Sans has kidnapped Frisk!" She managed to blurt out.

"We worried it might be a changeling, but changeling magic is a distinctly sickening green color, and this was a deep, royal blue that we saw the imposter using to lift Frisk up." Princess Luna added, Toriel having dropped the basket of scones as they scattered all about the floor, the words "Kidnapped Frisk" making her mouth hang open so wide you could have fit a beach ball into it. Alphys began quivering, almost having a panic attack as Princess Luna continued, sweat dribbling down Alphys's brow as the words "Magic" and "Royal blue" began to echo in her mind. "Is there a monster that can imitate people's appearance-"

"Royal Blue Magic?" Alphys whispered out, eyes going wider and wider.

She could hear the music echoing out from the room, and walked down the long, dark green hallway. A guitar was playing a fairly simple, and very iconic chord, an all-too-familiar voice echoing out through the laboratory as she got closer and closer. Pushing open the set of double doors ever-so-slightly, Alphys peeked inside, an enormous bony mass rising up higher and higher, growing larger and larger as pieces were added to it, all suspended in a royal blue aura of pure, raw power.

Her dear friend was playing away at the grey guitar, a red headband around his head twisting about as he played harder and harder, the chords now joined with riffs, the song getting progressively more metal. The bony pieces began to form into a more definite shape, that of a gigantic, huge skull that was very bestial in design, almost draconic in its visage as he sang loudly and proudly, a look of clear joy on his bony face. A black line rose up from his right eye, going up his skull whilst another line rose down from his left eye, down to his mouth as he toothily grinned.

"And the science gets done, and you make a neat gun for the people who are still aliiiiiive!" W.D Gaster sang out. "GASTER." Alphys realized, Toriel's body stiffening as her eyes widened as well, Alphys's claws flying to her cheeks. "Oh my God oh my God oh my God!"

"Gaster...Sans, the real Sans, mentioned him. He was their brother, the former Royal Scientist, correct? We heard he was scattered across time and space." Fluttershy asked, clearly confused as she tilted her head to the side, Princess Luna looking from Toriel to Alphys as Alphys adjusted her glasses.

"Yes, Gaster was the former royal scientist before me, and Sans and I both worked alongside him. He was brilliant, REALLY brilliant! Also kind of a goof sometimes. Guess it runs in the family." The dinosaur-esque monster sighed. "And yeah, he used to be with us until he fell into his machine, a device we had made to time travel. We wanted to use it to go back in time and prevent the Monster/Human War from ever happening, but there was an accident and he got scattered. But royal blue magic...nobody else could lift people but Sans and Paps, let alone have magic tinted like that!"

"I cannot believe I just...forgot about him." Toriel murmured. "He was so dear to us, especially before the War."

"What was life like before the war?" Princess Luna inquired, Toriel now looking very, VERY guiltily down.

"Well, er...Asgore's father had...that is, Dr. Gaster was the Royal Scientist for HIM to, and was asked to study human souls and prove whether the old legend we'd had passed down from our ancestors was true. He wanted to learn if monsters could absorb souls. Before it wasn't something we knew we could really do, it was just a myth to us, but then-" Toriel flinched.

"Ohhhh." Princess Luna cringed at the implication. "Oh MY."

"How...how did he remove the souls?" Fluttershy asked.

Silence from the two monsters as they quietly and nervously looked away, Princess Luna sighing sadly. "I shall not judge you. I did awful things myself when I allowed resentment and hatred into my heart and became Night Mare Moon. I almost caused 1000 years of darkness and doomed all of Equestria. We've all done things we regret and wish we could take back."

"Indeed, we have." Toriel quietly sighed. "But I cannot let Gaster harm my child. Do you know where he took him?" She asked.

"Not exactly..." Fluttershy quietly admitted as she bit her lip. "But we thought we could ask you two, see if you knew anything about him that could help us learn about where he might go."

"If you truly were his friend for so long, he might try to reach out to you, would he not?" Princess Luna asked of Alphys as she nodded, slightly wringing her hands. "And if so...I have a plan."

...

... "Sans" approached Alphys as she sat on a bench in the park, sipping on some soda, trying not to look worked up as he sat down next to her. "heya, Alphys. how's it hangin'?"

"Oh, I'm fine! How are you?" She asked in her slightly nasally voice, cringing a bit.

"...fine myself."

"Fine, fine. It's good that you're fine."

"yeeeep." "Yes, we're both feeling fine. It's fine to feel fine isn't."

"yes, it's...it's fine."

"Yes, we're both feeling fine! Yep! Both! Feeling! Fine!" Alphys said with a big smile, quivering slightly as "Sans" calmly waited. One...two...

"GAAAAH!" She groaned out, hanging her head. "I feel sick!"

"you think I can't tell when you're lying to me?" Gaster's voice rang out from Sans's form. "Alphys, come with me. You can have it done willingly or by force. Your choice."

"Just tell me where Frisk is." Alphys mumbled softly, head bowed as "Sans" took her shoulder and patted it.

"I haven't harmed him, I assure you. Now..."

A blink, a woosh, shooting through a tunnel of stars...and then, there they were, in Princess Luna and Celestia's old castle, Gaster now in his true form as he waltzed over to the sleeping Frisk, who was lying down on a nearby table as he gestured at the boy. "I've got both Papyrus and Sans within me, their entire being helping to constitute myself. With you and the human, all the pieces of me will be complete. I'll no longer be a shell of myself, Alphys. Can you understand how lonely it feels, just helpless, barely able to do anything but...watch? Watch as everyone forgets about you, and all that you did amounts to near nothing? To know that despite how hard you worked to help others, they remember nothing of you?"

"That is just not true." Alphys said, shaking her head. "They DO remember. I know Sans does. He even told a bad pun about you, Doctor."

"Do not stand on ceremony, Alphys, we've known each other for decades, you needn't call me-" Gaster stiffened as he suddenly swept towards "Alphys", and held a hand up, her body shrouded in Blue as her soul was made manifest...

"I THOUGHT you were a bit too light when we were teleporting. Who are you really?" He asked the imposter as the charade faded away in a soft burst of starlight, and Princess Luna now stood there, tall and proud.

"The others were told to hone in on me when my illusionary spell faded. They shall be here shortly." She reasoned. "Let the child and those you have absorbed go."

"I only want to be whole again." Gaster reasoned. "You should understand. You were locked away within yourself, helpless, unable to do naught but watch as Night Mare Moon made use of your body." He quietly intoned, his eyes slightly narrowing as he paced around her, sliding smoothly like a snake. "Imagine a world where everything functions perfectly without you. Where you are less than nothing. Where you are HELPLESS and able to do nothing but watch. You endured that. And you'd condemn me!?"

"No. What happened to you was wrong. Don't take it out on an innocent." Night Mare Moon insisted.

"Take it out? The process isn't painful." Gaster cooed. "It's actually quite pleasant, if not slightly surprising. Come...let me demonstrate!" He proclaimed, shooting towards her, black shadows stretching off his body as Luna's horn lit up. Bluish/purple light coalesced around it as she erected a shield, the shadows trying to pierce through it like needles trying to pop a bubble. Gaster rose high, high into the air before he held his long arms up, slamming them down on the shield just as Luna shot forth, slamming into his chest and knocking him back.

The shadows of his body caught him and re-righted him as she launched waves of blue and purple magic at him, Gaster sliding left and right as he grinned, giving her a small wink. "Do you believe I am going to stand there and let you hit me? No." He remarked, making gestures with his hands as bones shot from the ground, cascading towards her like a landslide. Luna flew up, up through the air as he made more odd gestures with his hands, the bones shooting at her as he shook his head back and forth. "You are only delaying the inevitable." He quietly sighed.

"Let them g-go!"

He turned, seeing Alphys was sitting atop of a yellow-furred pony, Toriel standing nearby as she folded her arms over her chest, Gaster lowering the shadows that were raised on their hackles around him, looking them over. "Ahh, you came, Alphys. You, Papyrus, Sans, Frisk..." Gaster said, clapping his hands as he shifted from himself to Papyrus, then Sans, then back to his normal form as he bounced his head back and forth. "All the pieces...pieces...pieces of me."

"Doctor, we know you want to be whole again." Toriel said softly, Frisk letting out a quiet moan as he rose up from the table. He hadn't been having any nightmares since Gaster had taken him, but he was still shocked out of his mind to see Gaster standing tall in front of the others. "But you needn't harm others to be happy. And absorbing them into yourself is taking away their freedom. It isn't right to harm others in the name of freeing others, that's the very thing I fought against."

"My former majesty, please understand. I am a shell of my former self. An echo. This is the only way to regain my form." Gaster spoke longingly.

"Not necessarily." Alphys offered. "Toriel has something that could help. We just needed Princess Luna to stall you."

Toriel launched something through the air, Gaster catching it in one bony, holed hand...looking down at the Lazarus Lapis in his grip as his body was bathed over in the green healing magic within. His eye sockets filled with the light, growing larger and larger, letting out a gasp as Sans and Papyrus slid out from the folds of his cloaked jacket, flopping onto the grassy floor below as Princess Luna quickly pulled them away, Frisk ducking under the table...

And then everything went white, and Frisk now saw Dr. Gaster standing alone in a dark abyss, his back turned, head slightly bowed as Frisk approached, nervously holding out a hand and taking the skeletal monster's cloak. "Um...mister Gaster?"

"...doctor." Doctor Gaster said, his voice having the less harsh, rusty echo to it that it had possessed, yet still somehow haunting and faintly reverberating in the infinite abyssal expanse of black around them. "Dr. Gaster. And...would that this would be enough." He said, slowly turning around, revealing a small White heart floating right in his chest, Frisk gasping. It had been cut in half, and the other half connected to it was the stone itself, the heart faintly pumping as Gaster mournfully stared down at Frisk. "The Lazarus Lapis is designed to resonate with your Soul. To connect with it to bring back your physical body, and all that comes with it. But I only had half a soul. And that means only half the work is done. My physical form is returned, my abilities with them. But that...that is all."

He closed his eyes, shaking his head back and forth. "I am everything and nothing. Everywhere and nowhere. I can't...feel anything but echoes. Not even with this making up part of me."

"I'm sorry." Frisk said, gently hugging the doctor as the skeletal monster stiffened slightly before gently kneeling down, Frisk feeling him wrapping his cloak/jacket around him much like how Sans sometimes liked to do to tuck Frisk away, nice and snug.

"Ha ha...you know, that...that does make me feel better about this." The doctor quietly whispered, Frisk feeling something gently landing on his forehead. Drip...drop. Drip...

Drop...

Drip...

...drop.

"Thank you."

A gentle, soft warmth spreading over him, as the infinite black settled in...

"...please. Forget about me."

And then Frisk was back in the castle with the others as they slowly rose up, rubbing their heads as they looked around, Sans blinking slowly. "whuh...what just happened?"

"...I don't know where to begin." Frisk admitted, looking off in the distance, a white figure faintly similar to himself standing there before shifting, changing shape...vanishing into the distance.

...

... "So he's...gone?" Princess Celestia asked of Sans as he and Papyrus stood in the throne room, Celestia steepling her hooves, her face filled with concern as she looked back at them.

"we think he has his physical form back, but anything else is just...kinda not really there at all." Sans sighed. "he's a real nowhere man now."

"MY POOR BROTHER. I WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO TO HELP. WHEN I WAS INSIDE OF HIM, I COULD FEEL AN ENDLESS SADNESS SWALLOWING ME..." Papyrus murmured, clutching himself, shivering slightly as he closed his eyes, Princess Celestia biting into her lip. This was a concern indeed.

"Someone who can teleport, become invisible, change shape...he could be anyone and anywhere." She whispered softly, Sans shrugging before suddenly shivering, feeling as though familiar eyes were upon him. He thought he saw a crack running up the eye of one of the guards on either side of the Princess, looking away and flinching. When he turned back, the guard was normal, and he sighed, a maid servant couple bringing in some cake for them, specially made by Muffet for the upcoming anniversary of Celestia and Luna's ascension to the throne. "We should keep an eye out for him. But for now, let us celebrate early. Celebrate having you two back with us. It would be horrible to lose two dear friends."

"yeah, probably best not to talk about Gaster for now." Sans said, a maidservant slicing off a piece of vanilla-frosted cake for him, giving him a slice that had a little pink rose on it as he gulped, swearing he saw a crack running up HER eye as well. Or was it on Papyrus's? Or Celestia's? Or his own reflection in the mirrors that lined the hall, or-

Sans shook his head. "yeah...better not. after all..."

He shuddered.

"it's rude to talk about someone who's listening."

#Undertales of Friendship #Undertale #video games #fanfic #fanfiction #w.d. gaster #Gaster #Sans #Papyrus #Frisk #My Little Pony #crossover #MLP #my little pony: friendship is magic #MLP:FiM

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weirdmarioenemies · 6 years ago

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It’s a Super Mario Odyssey masterpost!

Sorry to take a break from the Halloween goodness, but it’s the one year anniversary of Super Mario Odyssey! Hard to believe it’s been a whole year, isn’t it? There’s no denying this game is absolutely, how do we put this, “perfect” for a lack of even better compliments, with some vast, detailed worlds, many small fun challenges, and of course, lots of cool new Weird Mario Enemies!

...But today, we aren’t going to talk about enemies at all, because what this game also has is some fantastic Weird Mario Friends! To put things simple, there’s a lot of kingdoms in the game, and most of them have their own NPCs that we all love as dearly as the many friends and foes and spooky tree aliens we’ve featured on this blogs in months past, so sit back, as all three WME mods talk about the wonderful new NPCs we see in this game!

Talking about Bonneters, Tostarenans, and Steam Gardeners is Mod Chikako!

Talking about Lochladies, Shiverians, and Moon Rabbits is Mod F Boy!

And talking about New Donkers, Bubblainians, and Volbonans is Mod Hooligon!

With that out of the way, let’s-a go!

Name: Bonneter

Mario’s grand adventure starts off on an EXTREMELY strong foot when he regains consciousness in a land populated by... g-g-g-g-GHOSTS! The precious Bonneters live in the delightfully spooky Cap Kingdom, where there is rarely a color present besides white, gray, or black, and the whole land is enveloped in a thick fog. To top it all off, the music is simply perfect for a spooky, yet friendly town of ghosts! Also, they all have British accents.

Of course, there is one Bonneter who stands out from the rest, and that is Cappy, Mario’s newest friend! He embodies the ability of the Bonneters to take the form of normal hats and Capture other beings. Yeah, it’s basically possessing people. It’s okay. It’s fun.

What do you think is under their hat? Is it part of their body, or are they stylish? They don’t LOOK very natural, but Cappy has a few tufts of hair on his hat/head, so the answer is... I don’t know!

Also, there is no spooky-themed area in this game. The only ghosts in the entire game are your friends! Score one for ghosts!

Name: Tostarenan

Here they are... the first ever new characters we saw in Super Mario Odyssey! Remember that Switch trailer way back when? Where we saw like three seconds of Odyssey? Those three wonderful seconds? I do!

Tostarenans are, of course, based on calaveras, the decorative skulls used in the Mexican celebration of the Day of the Dead. They live in a cozy little town just as colorful as they are, and love nothing more than having fun and eating frozen- I mean, freezy treats!

As I’ve touched upon in their own post, Tostarenans have their own undead version, the Chincho! Which means... these are living skeletons! How does this work? They’re the same shape, so do they have exoskeletons? Again! I don’t know! But wow, that’s two sorta-spooky friend species already, huh? Like we said! This game is perfect!

Name: Lochlady

Lochladies are the world-famous fashion designers found in the Lake Kingdom... a Kingdom whose industry relies entirely on fashion! Peach/Mario’s very pretty wedding dress was made here. According to the brochure, they’re known for their flexibility but also their strength, and that’s kinda funny... they might look dainty, but these fish are strong!

A fish? A mermaid? They’re really a bit of both. Of course mermaids are their main inspiration, but these things very clearly have scales, right? It’s nice that even the very-human designs in Mario are still a little bit silly.

Though, I suppose the term “mermaid” wouldn’t really apply to them, since mer comes from the Latin for “sea”... instead, they’re named Lochladies... a loch, of course, being a Scottish word for a lake... Like Loch Ness! And Dorrie, the incredibly-Loch-Ness-Monster-inspired friend, even shows up here. If you ignore the fact that Lake Lamode is a French name, it all works out.

Name: Steam Gardener

That’s no watering can! Just kidding, it is. But it’s also a robot! And most importantly, it’s a friend! Really just a wonderful combination of things to be.

Steam Gardeners live in the Steam Gardens! They’re steam-powered! They garden! And they are very good at it. They come in different magnitudes of rustiness, but don’t worry! It seems they can very well go on forever as long as they stay charged. Their heads can be empty, but can also contain flowers or even seeds that they can dispense!

I really love the Steam Gardeners because they don’t really look like a character at all, you know? They look robotic, sure, but there’s not really much of a face or anything. And if you ask me, that makes them even more fun! The flashing lights seem to act as a face, if anything, since that’s what they point toward you while speaking. Oh yeah, they’re even asymmetrical! They’re really just a mishmosh of things that most people wouldn’t consider “cute”, but guess what! I think it’s precious! Sue me! (I would probably win because this isn’t a valid reason to sue someone!)

Name: New Donker

When the first trailer for Super Mario Odyssey came out, one thing that immediately caught everyone’s attention was the New Donkers! Usually, when humans appear in the Mario series, they are very heavily stylized, like ol’ Mario Mario himself! But these humans are hardly stylized at all, looking like your average businessperson you’d pull off the streets of New York in the 1950s!

Seeing Mario interacting with these much less stylized people is as jarring as it is hilarious, with lots of people questioning how this sort of image could be from a real Mario game. This is exactly the kind of off-the-wall wackiness we all appreciate over here!

...Of course, then there’s the question of if the New Donkers are technically human. We know Mario is human! We’ve gotten numerous statements from Nintendo that confirm it, aside from one old advertisement which listed him as “homo nintendonus.” What we really should be talking about is the New Donkers! We have no official source considering them humans, as they are exclusively referred to as “New Donkers” in-game. One statement from Nintendo says the reason Mario looks so different from the New Donkers is because “there’s lots of different kinds of people in the world,” but when the definition of “people” also includes dancing skeletons and garden robots, I think that it can be considered a pretty broad term.

Of course, even then, New Donkers and humans are obviously two very genetically-similar species capable of cross-breeding. How else do we explain Pauline?

Name: Shiverian

I love many many things in this big blue Earth of ours, but chubby seals are definitely way up there. So, these guys? Absolutely... wonderful. I love them. I love their dopey voices, I love their cute widdle faces. I love their cosy little town, and I love that they hold competitions where they literally roll around a racetrack, because they’re just that round and fat!!

Shiverians are one of the few NPCs you can capture, too! When in Fat Seal form, you can compete in their Bound Bowl races... Humans aren’t allowed to participate, but the brochure makes it clear that only a fat seal man could survive such a race.

And above all, I love their funky elder. Look at those shades. He’s a cool old man. He’s not like your grandpa- he’s hip!

Name: Bubblainian

I think one thing we can all appreciate here at Weird Mario Enemies Dot Geocities Dot Io is gastropods, no matter what shape or form they take. In Super Mario Odyssey, they take the form of giant French snails with flesh-lips, but better off to be a snail with weird flesh-lips than not be a snail at all, am I right gamers?

I’m glad that they picked snails as their “easy-going beach populace,” (though snails are a good choice for anything, really) but what stands out most about Bubblainians to me isn’t the Bubblainians themselves, but rather, one very particular run-down I had with one during my playthrough of the game!

Bubblainians hide in their shells whenever an enemy gets too close, a small detail I really love. However, one time when I was playing, I was wearing the chef outfit, and was running up to talk to one of these guys when without warning, it hid in its shell! I assume a nearby Gushen might’ve just gotten a little too close, but I just thought it was silly because these French snails were afraid of a chef!

You know, because escargot is a dish in France that’s made from snails and...

Well, it was funny to me at least.

Name: Volbonan

My absolute favorite world in Super Mario Odyssey has to be... New Donk City. I feel that that’s most peoples’ favorite. My immediate second choice, however, is Mount Volbono, and I just love its inhabitants to death. Before I die, you’ll see me laying down, on my deathbed saying “man, I sure love the Volbonans from Super Mario Odyssey” and then I’ll be dead.

But why do I love Volbonans so much? Well, I guess it’s just that I’ve always sort of had an affinity for inanimate object creatures (anyone who’s met me knows how much I love Vanilluxe) and Volbonans are just a perfect design for a fork character! I tried a few shots at designing fork characters in the past, but I made the dire mistake of putting the face on the part with the tines, rather than the handle, a mistake which the Volbonans so excellently fix! Really, I never considered using the tines as limbs, it’s a design that works so well that I’d be cursing myself if the Volbonans weren’t so inherently blessed in and of themselves.

Throw on the chef hats and neckerchiefs, and they go from perfect to extremely perfect, having a design befitting of their hobby of cooking! It feels weird that an entire species has a life focused on cooking, but I suppose that if you’re a giant fork in a land of giant food, there’s nothing better you can do. One of the souvenirs you can buy from Mount Volbono is a set of forks based on the Volbonans themselves! Cute! A little freaky, but still cute!

I think it goes without saying that I want the Volbonans, alongside every other Odyssey NPC, to be playable in the next Mario Kart. Let me race around the whole Mario world as a giant fork or 1950′s (ambiguously) human man!

Name: Moon Rabbit

I am summoned once again from the depths of my cave to talk about Japanese folklore, because I enjoy doing that! The Dark Side stage, unlocked after you beat the game, is also known as “Rabbit Ridge”, and features food-shaped rocks and a whole lotta bunnies... Why? You may or may not have already heard of the story of the moon rabbit (it’s pretty well-known), but in case you haven’t:

According to our friends in the east, the markings of the moon kind of resemble a rabbit pounding mochi with a mortar and pestle. And yeah, I can totally see it. Of course, Mario Odyssey very prominently features hats, and it prominently features the moon in nearly every Kingdom.... and rabbits, naturally, are pulled out of hats! It works on so many levels!

The regular Moon Rabbits aren’t all that talkative, but of course, there are some fairly notable rabbits, too! Yup, the Broodals are from the Dark Side of the moon... which might even be why they look like UFOs when they fly around in their hats. I won’t talk too much about them here, but you’ve gotta wonder... why are they so much more anthropomorphic than their fellow Moon Rabbits? Is this a Goofy/Pluto scenario?

#super mario odyssey #mario #mod chikako #mod f boy #mod hooligon

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newwayastrology · 6 years ago

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AN ACTUAL CONSULTATION EXAMPLE I get requests sometimes for the cliet to tape the consultation. I usually tell them that there will be no need for a tape because they will remember the one or two main points shown in the horoscope. In this case, the client said that she was going to take my Course and that listening to her own consultation might be of benefit later on down the line. She taped it and then wrote it out for me to use for instruction. This is it below: The first thing I always do is look for a hemisphere emphasis. The hemisphere emphasis is like the introduction to a book. It gets you in the ballpark of what to expect. Everything in a chart is within the context of the hemisphere emphasis. Here, it is northern and that immediately introduces a parental concern. Seeing that there is a parental concern, you look for corroboration and that is easy to see with the 4th House activity and the close square between the Sun and Moon, which is always an indication of parents who were not on the same page during conception, around the time of birth, or just in general. All parental rulers are involved in tension so there’s little doubt here that there was a substantive parental concern to discuss in this consultation. Whenever there is a parental concern, there is a psychological pattern that follows in real life that brings in self-esteem concerns, a delay in finding out just who one is in life (causes a lot of mistakes to be made; this is seen when the ruler of the Ascendant is involved in tension or is retrograde)) and it all usually spills out in relationships with people, especially personal relationships. This is psychiatry, real life expectations. The 2nd House (self-esteem) has obvious tension shown between the rulers of the 2nd House and 5th House, as well as the rulers of those Houses. What does that tell us? First, an explanation. In a Natural horoscope (has Aries on the Ascendant, Taurus on the 2ndm Gemini on the 3rd, etc), the 2nd House is always square to the 5th House. The 5th House is one’s sexual identity. It’s where we look to see if there are any challenges giving love. So, when there are planets involved that tie these Houses together, we expect that there is something about the way this woman feels about herself that causes a challenge of some kind when it comes to giving love. Let’s break it down with significator dynamics. The Moon is square the Sun and Saturn. This incorporates the 1st, 2nd, and 7th Houses – delay in identity realization, self-esteem, and relationships. We start to get the beginnings of a theme. The Jupiter-Pluto conjunction in the 2nd squares Venus. It refers to overdoing things, relationally and sexually. When Venus and Pluto are in hard aspect, there is usually a relational perspective that causes problems for the person because it is out of line with what’s possible in that person’s reality. The sexual identity is the 5th House. What happens to that identity during sex with someone else is shown through the 8th House. The 8th is ruled by Uranus and Uranus trines Venus and has no tension. So, this leads us to believe that she is just fine when she is having sex with someone else. The issue here is what she brings to the table when it comes to giving love. Mars squares the Ascendant, exactly……anger taken in from the early home. Mercury-Neptune in 4 equates to idealism/confusion in the home. Now, I check to see if there is anything at the Sun/Moon midpoint. There is nothing contacting it but it is at the Aries Point, which means a projection of ego and relational things that is worn on the sleeve for all to see. I also see Venus=Ura/ASC=Mars/Ura=Sun/Node. It’s all relational/sexual stuff. The Sun-Moon-ASC blend of Scorpio-Leo-Cancer suggests a deeply privately, controlling emotional life energy that is expressed through a personality that needs recognition and it is all expressed through an emotional security-seeking image. You’d expect a person with a strong sense of purpose with fixed emotions that easily dramatize sexual or sensational matters. Expectations of fulfillment from others is strong, especially when it comes to ego security and love needs. Notice the red marks in the aspect grid. They are quintiles. When there are multiple quintiles, creativity needs to be important, if nothing more than in a serious hobby. Quite often, it is a part of or focus on creativity in the job or career. One midpoint picture, Sun=Mer/Ven, is another indication of creativity. The period on the end of the sentence is Neptune conjunct Mercury. This is a decided, emphasized creativity…a strong focus of imagination. It also refers to confusion at home. Plu=Ven/Sat really, really emphasizes the relational/sexual control factors shown in the chart. Then, on the other hand, there is Mars=Ven/Plu, a very sexual midpoint. And, Ven=URA/Mc=Mars/ASC. I have three concerns to address with her: parents, self-esteem, relationships/sex. THE CONSULTATION Me: Thanks for being exactly on time. Even though this is Skype, it is good to meet you. We are going to have a great discussion today. Her: I am excited. My goodness, what a sexy voice you have. I would be standing over your shoulder if we were married. (laughs). I know how these women are out here. (That statement from her immediately told me that her issues relationally are because she is controlling and she is controlling because she is insecure. She is insecure because the relationship model she got from home through her parents is dysfunctional). Me: Thank you. I have received voice compliments my entire life but you didn’t pay me to talk about my voice so let’s get to you. In a nutshell, the central energy of this horoscope is probing, passionate, deeply emotional and needs to have control by knowing everything. This basic energy is expressed through a personality that needs recognition and ego security. All of this is expressed to others who don’t know you very well through an emotional, nurturing image. In a nutshell, this horoscope suggests that you come from a parental situation that wasn’t necessarily fulfilling and functional. From this, you absorbed feelings that created self-esteem concerns that affect your life intensely when it comes to relationships and sex. As well, there is anger absorbed from the parental situation that probably caused you to make a lot of errors in life before you finally understood who you are. Let’s begin with you telling me about your parents. Her: They fought all the time and I mean physically. I have seen them hit each other a million times and they’ve been married 25 years! Me: What do you think you took from their relationship? Her: I’m a real bitch. I was married and divorced three times by the time I was 21 years old. I don’t take no shit. (Rulers of the 1st and 7th in conflict) Me: Your libido is strong or does it suffer from all this anger you’ve absorbed and make things difficult when it comes to being intimate? Her: My libido is overwhelming. I have been to Sexaholics Anonymous for it. There was a time when I couldn’t even wipe myself after a pee without masturbating. It’s nothing for me to come a dozen times a day masturbating. And, during sex, hell, a kiss on the neck makes me cum. I am very multi-orgasmic, even explosive. I squirt like a urination. Me: So, then, would you say that you are controlling, sexually speaking? (Saturn means being controlled or being controlling.) Her: Unfortunately, yes. There was one time when I had a real bad day at work. My boyfriend had a root canal that day. When I got home, he was just trying to deal with the beginnings of pain but I needed to get laid. I didn’t at all care about his feelings. I want what I want when I want it. I guess I am controlling, huh? I knew I was wrong. His jaw was swollen and everything but I needed to cum and that’s all I cared about. Me: It’s good that you understand that you were wrong in retrospect. The idea is to be thoughtful BEFORE an act, not afterwards. Tell me about the importance of creativity in your life. Please, at least say you have a creative hobby. And, oh yea, what did that guy do? Her: By the time I got done giving him head, he forgot about his pain and did me. When I came in from work the next day, he was gone and had taken all of his stuff. Creativity? I manage a clothing design company. I approve or reject all designs and I am responsible for the prudent use of an 8-figure budget. Even at home with sex, I am very creative. I like to play games. I like to find ways to bring a man almost to “that point” and then stop and go watch TV or something. Then, I’ll get him again and stop. I start this on Friday night and do it again on Sunday. By the time Sunday comes, he is about to lose his mind. Creativity underscores everything I do. You are good and your wife is lucky. All you’d have to do is talk to me and I would climax. Me: You are a mess. What a flirt but ya know, that is what you do to try and control the room. It rescues your fragile sense of self-esteem but no matter how many sexual conquests you have, you still aren’t comfortable looking in the mirror, right? Her: Like I said, you are good. Sex rescues me. I suck at relationships but I am a champion with sex. Me: Have you ever considered therapy to address these buried feelings of anger, the fractured self-esteem and the rest? Her: Really? Do you think it will help? Me: Absolutely. There are some things in the depth of you that you need to address and understand so that you can be more productive, relationally-speaking. Plus, the pain. You have a confident personality but we both know that you are as soft as water. All you did was teach yourself some behaviors that hide the pain. You don’t want anyone to know how very vulnerable you are to suggestions that offer emotional security. The perfect situation for you is having a great family that is very secure with a husband who treats you like a queen. Her: You are trying to make me cry, right? Me: No, you are trying to prevent yourself from showing real emotion. You’ll show sexual emotions because you control those scenarios but when sex is removed, you become an actress because your model for relationships is based on terminally feuding parents. You’ve got to be comfortable with who you are and understand that you were a victim in the traffic pattern of your parents. They didn’t fight because of you. They had issues before you were born. Did either of them have a great upbringing? Her: You are scary. No, neither one of my parents had both parents. You just went to my soul. I feel naked. Well, look…..is there anything major showing for the rest of this year? Me: Not at all. But don’t let that get in the way of therapy. Her: Okay. I am embarrassed about the flirting with you but really, your voice is heavenly. I know I am not the first woman to say it. It’s just the truth. You can’t possibly have any more to talk about with my chart. If you do, too bad. Nothing else is important. I’m going to seek out someone to talk to professionally. I don’t want to continue this way just being a nice piece of ass for men. I want something meaningful. I don’t want to have to offer sex just to snuggle with someone on Christmas Eve, you know? Me: Let me know how the therapy goes. We covered the main theme of your horoscope. If you were with another astrologer, you might get a lot of information that isn’t really helpful. I go straight for the jugular. Most people have one or two major issues that, if cleared up, work wonders for fulfillment in life. Get that therapy, okay? Her: I will. One last thing…..tonight, thinking about your voice is…. ME:…..JUST STOP. You are insane. See ya. Her: (laughing) Okay. Bye.

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