#and also there was a thing i didn't want to write and by the time i figured out how to get around writing it i'd lost a lot of drive for it
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Cooking Together
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: Bucky asks you to cook a meal with him.
Word Count: Over 1.5k
Warnings: Fluff, longing, pining, canon divergent neighbor AU, flirting of sorts, mention of HYDRA, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?).
A/N: Short and sweet for @stellar-solar-flareâs Starry Winter Sky Event! I went with cooking together and Neighbor AU as a small expansion of this nonsense. February has had some lingering January energy, and I hope you enjoy what I was able to write! â¤ď¸ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
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If you asked Bucky if he thought he was a good cook, heâd say he was decent. He retained some of what his mom taught him many years ago and he carefully followed recipes once he was completely free of HYDRA. It was admittedly a bit of a rough go at first. Being able to choose what he could eat was a foreign concept after he didn't have the choice for so long. It got better each day. Every single meal he got to reclaim a piece of himself by making the choice of what he did and didnât want.
Until today, he always cooked alone.
âThanks for inviting me over,â you smiled, graciously accepting the apron he handed you.
Bucky had moved into the building a few months ago and you lived across the hall. As far as neighbors went, you were the best. Since day one, you always greeted him with a smile and a kind word. You never played your music too loud or disturbed anyone. Alpine adored you, which told him everything he needed to know since she was the best judge of character. And you never once objected to looking out for her when he had to leave for a mission.
Out of paranoia, he left harmless little âtrapsâ to see if you'd snoop through anything the very first time you went over. Nothing that would hurt you or draw your attention, of course, but something that would let him know if anyone tampered with anything. You didn't. You were a genuinely good and respectful person, and that made him trust you more.
âThanks for accepting the invitation. And allow me,â he offered, stepping behind you to help you tie it. His fingers lingered on the fabric and he took the moment to inhale your sweet scent before he stepped away. He didn't want to be a creep. âAnd itâs the least I could do since you offered to watch Alpine. Again.â
âI love watching her. Sheâs wonderful.â
The photos you sent were something he always looked forward to when he was away. Some of the captions you added made him laugh and smile. His favorite was a selfie you took with Alpineâs cheek against yours. He saved it as âmy girlsâ, which you werenât aware of.
Because you technically werenât his girl.
âWell, she adores you,â Bucky smiled. He adored you, too. It stunned him when he found out you were single, and he was selfishly thankful for that.Â
âIâll have to get her another toy,â you said, your lips curling in a small smile. âIf thatâs okay with you.â
He laughed, a warm and easy sound. âBetween the two of us, sheâs spoiled rotten and she wouldnât want it any other way.â
He never expected to be a cat dad, but life surprised him. In fact, it also surprised him that Alpine wasnât camping out nearby or brushing against one of your legs. She was a smart cat and likely somehow sensed that he wanted alone time with you.
âWell, she deserves it,â you winked before things went quiet.
One of the nice things about hanging out with you was that he didn't mind any bouts of silence. They didnât feel awkward or tense. In those quiet moments and stolen glances he felt like he had the best conversations with you. He was happy and felt safe being in the same space as you.
âYou know,â Bucky began as he set the ingredients on the counter. He lucked out by having a decent sized kitchen since he took up a lot of space. âIf I was a better neighbor, I would've just cooked a meal for you while you relaxed.â
It felt romantic for the two of you to cook together, but you weren't together and now he felt like an idiot. A gentleman would've made you a meal and pampered you. Or take you out for a nice meal. He hadnât dressed up, opting for his jeans and a trademark Henley while you wore a sundress that had his mind racing with both sweet and filthy images. He didn't have flowers for you either.
His âgameâ, as Sam would say, was rusty.
âYou're a great neighbor, Bucky. The best neighbor Iâve had,â you defended. He tried to be a good neighbor and person. A minor way to make up for some of his forced wrongdoings. âAnd cooking something together is fun! We could even try something at my place next week if you'd like.â
Bucky almost knocked the salt over, his eyes wide. âReally?â You were inviting him over to do this again?
âYeah, really,â you replied, taking a moment to scan the simple recipe in the cookbook. You always had the cutest expression when you concentrated on something, and he didnât want to choose something too difficult for the first meal. âWe can take turns picking things out to try and trade off cooking at your place and mine. You can even bring Alpine over if you want.â
He suddenly had the image of you in his arms, dancing around the kitchen as you both waited for a meal in the oven to cook. Soft music, low lighting, his hands on your hips, and a tender smile on your face. Stealing a gentle kiss and keeping his eyes open only for a moment so he could see for himself that it wasn't a dream.
âYeah,â he breathed, pulling his hair back in a ponytail and washing his hands to distract himself from his thoughts. âIâd really like that.â
âGreat,â you exhaled. His heart beat faster when he caught you staring. He liked to pretend the look in your eyes was longing. âSorry. You justâŚâ you cleared your throat and gestured to his head. âYou have really nice hair.â
The compliment had his heart racing even faster. âI have nice hair?â he asked. Your fingers would feel amazing in his hair.
You ducked your head for a moment before you met his gaze with a soft smile. âYeah, you do.â
âThanks,â he smiled back, his shoulder brushing yours when he stood beside you. Electricity lightly cracked between you. Did you feel it, too? âUm, I peeled the carrots before you got here. Would you like to cut them?â
âOh, I think youâre better with a knife than I am,â you giggled.
He puffed his chest out and twirled the knife he selected in his hand without thinking about it. Part of him was showing off because, well, he wanted you to stare again. âHow about I help you?â
âHelp me? How?â you asked.
âHere.â He placed the knife in your hand and stood behind you once he had the carrots on the cutting board. âIâm going to preface this by saying Iâm far from an expert, but I usually cut them into decent sized pieces before I dice them.â
âI trust your judgement,â you said, glancing over your shoulder. Your faces were close enough that he could kiss you if he leaned in a fraction. But he didnât. He wouldnât take what you didnât offer.
Carefully placing his hands over yours once you faced forward, he felt that electricity crackle again as he helped guide you. He angled his hips so he didnât press against you, but still stayed close. âSee? Youâre a natural,â he whispered against your ear when you made the first cut through the vegetable.
He heard the hitch in your breath and how your blood rushed faster in your veins. He felt your skin warm under his touch as you cut the next piece. He also caught the slight tremble that went through your frame when his grip tightened, but he didnât sense any fear. He hadn't detected any sort of fear or disgust since he came into your life.
But what he sensed in this very moment was excitement.
âThanks, Bucky,â you whispered back. The way you spoke his name was breathy, beautiful, and he longed to hear that again. âYouâre a great teacher.â
âIâm not,â he said, thankful your back was to him so you wouldnât see the pink that tinted his cheeks. âBut I appreciate it.â
âYeah, you are,â you stated, tempting him to turn your head toward him to kiss you. If he did that and you stabbed him, he wouldnât blame you or hold it against you. âAnd Bucky?â
âYeah?â
âI really am glad you invited me over,â you said.
He stopped himself from putting his face in the crook of your neck. âI am, too,â he said, smiling to himself as he helped you finish up. âAnd now that youâve mastered the carrots, we can chop the onions.â
âOnions? Oh, no,â you groaned playfully.
As the sound of both of you laughing a second later filled the room, Bucky was glad he went with his gut and asked for you two to cook together.
And maybe before the night was over, heâd ask you out on a date and prove to himself that his game wasn't completely hopeless.
I wonder just how he'll ask you out! Love and thanks for reading! â¤ď¸
Masterlist â Bucky Barnes Masterlist â Ko-Fi
#navybrat writes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes fanfiction#neighbor!bucky barnes#neighbor!bucky barnes x reader#stellasstarrywintersky#bucky x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky x you#bucky fanfic#bucky fanfiction#bucky imagine#sebastian stan#sebastian stan characters#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#the winter soldier#x reader#bucky barnes fluff#james bucky buchanan barnes#bucky barnes fic
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I want to set the record straight regarding a certain OST for a short film that should be coming out later this year, because one of its directors is making false and hurtful claims about me and my business ethic. After he made a prominent appearance on a drama stream about me & wrote a section of my callout doc, I told him that I wasn't interested in dragging him publicly, but that has felt more impossible as time goes on and I realize the extent of his misrepresentation. I had a vision of this film being able to release quietly in spite of everything, but I don't think that can happen, and I fully expect him to try and hurt my chances at further work.
In 2023, between techdogs 4 and 5, I worked on music for a then good friend's student film. It is by far the most technically difficult job I've ever had, and I did it for free. Now, before you get mad, this is partially (mostly) my fault. I never negotiated a price beforehand, and when I found out partway through that I was working for free, I let it slide for fear of being disruptive. If I was asked to quote a price today, it would have been approximately 900 USD. The work was a hellish and grueling experience, technical in ways I'd never been prepared for, and I sorely regret not putting my foot down, because I was hollowed out by the end of it.
A big portion of his callout against me is concerned with, bafflingly, my decision not to contribute my own money to the film, which at that point would have been a negative paycheck. I didn't pay the thirty dollars that I would've had to pitch in for the film to be screened, and I considered that a fine payment for the nine hundred dollars of work they got from me. He goes on to write that I'm rich anyways, I pay hundreds of dollars on album art (business expenses that I know I'll make back when the music is released) and "furry porn," because apparently if I am occasionally willing to drop a pretty penny on a pleasure purchase then I should simply be compelled to pay them randomly for things I hold no stake in and that I signed no contract for. He also mentions that I paid them later for the DCP file at another screening, of course by that point I had gotten the vibe that they were wanting for me to drop money on their project, so I did, giving the post-hoc justification that "i guess in this case I also care about the film sounding good." He writes "well I guess that was something she deemed worthy" without realizing the implication would then be that he did not see my own work as worthy.
Let me make this clear, this is like if a voice actor worked on my video game for free as a favor with no expectations of royalties, and then I asked them to help me pay to get the game on steam. This is presented along reheated second, third, fourthhand accounts of sexual misconduct.
And before we move on, to the claim that one album artist had to wait for years before receiving payment, this is true. I did forget to pay one artist, and only found out after their assistant contacted me years later, where I then paid six times the asking price as a late fee. I was commissioning over ten album arts every year, and as of now, this is the only time I have made this mistake.
It is impossible for me to refute his claims about the personal time we spent together in Omaha, as it would just be my word against his. I will just say that he should know the omitted reasons that I have grown to feel I was disposed, discarded, and taken for granted by him, and how he has nothing to do with why I hold those memories at that film festival so highly. He also does the classic thing where he positions allowing me to pick the movie in the evening as this favor he did, making me unknowingly rack up debt for a bargain I never consented to.
During all this, he has expressed an existential fear of being harassed for going public about me, and for this reason I want to say that I still hope that this film can be released without a fuss, but his continued participation in a harassment campaign against me has done far more to tarnish his reputation than I ever could. If you really cared about your image, pressure Crim to re-record that drama stream without your embarrassing petty grievances in it & delete your testimony from the callout doc. Thanks.
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Back To You | (One-shot)
pairing: modern!aemond Ă fem!reader (friend with benefits)
summary: you're always there, hoping for more. to be more. to mean more and something real. but that's not what he wants, always drawing the line. until⌠you just can't take it anymore.
words: 19k
sorry for the delay and also sorry this is too long. i won't promise anything next time đ
and please comment, i want to hear your opinions, a reblog is also appreciated guys.
my masterlist
warnings: angst, sex content, heartbreak.
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The first time you met Aemond, it was in the same way everyone else did and in his main way of making himself known to people: quiet, calm and reserved.
If you didn't have friends in common, you know you would never have been able to get close to him. But it was your small group of friends in college that brought you together with him; Alysanne, Sara, Cregan and Jason.
From the beginning, Aemond seemed to exist in his own orbit.
While the others fill the spaces with laughter and conversation, he preferred silence. He is like a constant shadow in the group, always present but not fully integrated.
He usually didn't speak much in topics of conversation, but when he did, his voice is quiet, soft and even soothing that it was almost hypnotic.
And maybe that was what first caught your attention. Something about the way he was, that unwavering distance and tranquility that wasn't arrogant, but almost⌠carefree.
You understand that he befriended Cregan in one of the classes they shared together. And it was Cregan who gradually included him in the group, at the same time that Sara was also including you.
You soon noticed that, although he was present at meetings and outings, there was a pattern in his behavior.
He talked more with Cregan and Jason, not with the same ease with which they talked to each other, but with a ease that he didn't have with Alysanne, Sara or you.
It's not that he was rude, when you addressed him a few times, he responded politely, but his tone was always restrained, measured.
And not only that, you also notice that as soon as someone tries to get too close, invisible walls rise around him, high and impenetrable. And his selectivity with the people he surrounds himself with, or talks to, becomes all too noticeable.
Even in the group chat Alysanne had created, he doesn't say much. In fact, he doesn't say anything at all.
He never initiated conversations or left casual comments compared to the others. And when he did write, it was only when someone asked him a question. Sometimes days or weeks would go by without his name coming up in conversation.
And, at least, at first⌠you didn't think much of him.
Aemond was just another presence in the group, someone with whom you shared moments but not necessarily a connection, let alone a friendship, at all. You just kept in mind that his reserved and carefree attitude made him different.
Although over time, you began to notice certain things about him that began to catch your attention.
The way he kept his distance even when surrounded by people. The ease with which he glided through life without worrying about fitting in or pleasing anyone. And the way he showed no interest in being heard or belonging.
He didn't show his emotions and it was hard to read. As well as it was hard to tell what he was thinking about, if he was thinking about anything at all.
That made him even more intriguing and that was the way he inevitably began to draw your interest.
Not because you hoped to change him or because you wanted to discover some secret hidden behind his distant attitude, but because, without even trying, he stood out from everyone else.
While the others sought validation in shared laughter and endless conversation, Aemond didn't care about any of that. And worst of all, no matter how hard you tried to ignore him, every time you saw him, every time you suddenly heard his voice, you felt something twisting inside you.
At first, you justified it as simple curiosity. But curiosity doesn't explain the way your attention kept coming back to him.
How you found yourself looking for him at every meeting, how you waited for him to speak, even if it was just to answer a simple question, and how, despite his indifference, you began to realize that you wanted him closer.
It also didn't help with how incredibly attractive he is.
Despite the scar down the middle of his face and the eye he doesn't have, actually being a prosthetic, he is beautiful.
An accident, Cregan told you, when you asked him, to get a little more information about him. But that was all he told you and with a tone that made it clear to you that he didn't even know that much. So you didn't press the subject.
Not because you weren't curious, but because you knew that Aemond is the kind of person who doesn't talk about certain things with just anyone. And over time, that distance between the two of you began to bother you.
You wanted to get to know him beyond the few words he shared with the group, beyond the occasional comments he made. So, one day, you decided to try to get closer to him.
Try to break down his walls with you.
A difficult thing to do, considering everyone knows what he's like. But not impossible. Or at least that's what you told yourself.
You have an advantage, considering you both belong to the same group of friends. But you know that won't make it any less difficult, still, it's something in your favor. The problem was that you needed an excuse.
You couldn't just show up and talk to him for no reason. You needed something that would get his attention so he would talk back to you to keep him. But there was nothing. There was no specific topic, no common theme or shared class, nothing.
But you would find it. You had to.
Until one day, you saw a change in him. So slight and so small it could barely be noticed. Anyone else wouldn't have even noticed, but you did.
A change in his cold and disinterested attitude, which was suddenly colder and more disinterested. He was more serious than usual. He didn't speak at all unless the guys asked him something.
And his look⌠serious and even annoyed, with slumped shoulders and as if he was more lost in thought than usual. From the morning, when he arrives on campus with his usual air of indifference, you notice that change in him.
And on a Friday, as the day goes by normally, you can't take your eyes off him.
At lunch, the group gathers in the gardens for lunch, as usual, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. Jason and Cregan talk about their usual anecdotes, Alysanne and Sara laugh and tease them and he⌠completely silent.
Sitting at the end of the table, he has only a bottle of water in front of him, which he sips from time to time. He does not join in the conversation and gazes off into the horizon, lost in thought.
But his tense posture, hard stare and clenched jaw, you notice all that. You want to talk to him. Ask him if he's okay. But you don't want to bother him. However, Jason notices it too and thankfully asks him.
âWhat's wrong, dude? Aren't you going to eat?â
You immediately watch them intently.
âI'm not hungry,â he replies simply and without emotion.
âAnd why is that? Everything okay with you?â
Aemond nods without saying anything else. He doesn't explain, and Jason doesn't insist. Neither do the others. They simply continue the conversation as if nothing had happened.
To them, Aemond has always been like that; reserved, quiet and indifferent. But you know there's more to it.
The minutes pass and you don't know what to do. You think about what would be the most ideal way to approach him. But nothing comes to mind.
Then he suddenly stands up and tells Cregan quietly that he will be leaving for his next class. He doesn't say goodbye to the others, just hangs his backpack over his shoulder and leaves.
And it's in that instant that you make a decision.
You don't know if it's a good idea. You don't know if it will work. And you hesitate, as you watch him walk off into the distance.
You could approach him, ask him if he's okay. But you know he'll most likely pull your back out before you can even try. So instead, you pull out your phone, unlock the screen, open the messaging app and start typing.
'Hey, are you okay?'
Simple. Subtle. Polite. You don't look at it the wrong way. In fact, it might work. Still, nerves wash over you, actually not so sure. But you finally take a deep breath and press send.
Honestly, you don't know why you thought he'd respond right away. Or that at the very least, his response would come in maybe ten or fifteen minutes.
By the time night falls and you're lying in your bed, rolling through your social media and no new messages, you begin to accept that he won't reply. And that he probably just ignored the message because he's not the least bit interested.
You sigh and put your phone aside, trying to push the topic out of your mind. But just as sleep begins to grip you, the vibration of your phone startles you.
You pick up the device quickly, a spark of hope lighting up your chest, only to have it shut off abruptly when you read his reply.
'Who are you?'
Embarrassment hits you so hard you feel heat rise to your face.
Disillusion and disappointment that he doesn't even have you in his contacts. You mean⌠you both belong to the same group of friends and you're both in the same group chat. And he doesn't have your number?
You bite the inside of your cheek, seriously considering not saying anything else to him and pretending this never happened.
But after staring at the message for a few long minutes, you let go of the humiliation and reply in the hope that he'll get back to you in a few minutes and not until tomorrow.
'I'm Y/N.'
A few minutes pass, at most three, but you feel them eternal. All is silence, until your next message comes through.
'Why do you ask that?'
You press your lips together, rereading the screen. It could be genuine curiosity⌠or it could be his way of making you feel even more out of place. But you don't take it back. Not this time and not anymore.
So you sigh, settle better in bed and decide to be honest.
'Well, I saw you really off today and I just wanted to make sure you're okay.'
The 'read' indicator almost to the second, makes your heart skip a beat. And you watch, expecting to see the 'typing' later.
But seconds pass and nothing. And you watch your screen more intently, as if that will magically make him decide to write you when you want him to. And when you see that he has left you on read, again the embarrassment invades you.
When suddenly, finally, the ´typing´ appears and your heart skips a beat. And finally, his reply.
'I'm fine.'
Two words. Nothing more.
You bite your lip, reading the message over and over, not entirely what you expected and increasingly convinced that this is going to be harder than you thought.
It's not a closed response, but it's not an invitation to continue the conversation either. You could leave it at that. Decide that you did your part and that, if he doesn't want to talk, you can't force him.
But something in you is resisting. You don't want to leave it at that even though you know you're going to be disappointed and that this, his attitude, won't change overnight.
But at least you can be honest. So you write and send the message before you regret it.
'If you need someone to talk to, I'm here.'
And again, you wait.
Surprisingly, he reads your message within a second. However, disappointment again overcomes you when you read his immediate, curt reply.
'Thanks.'
All hope, anticipation and excitement evaporates from your body. You stand there for a moment doing nothing, thinking about what else to write him, wanting to be more sincere and show him that he's counting on you.
'I mean it. I'm here for you, Aemond.'
That's something you'd like to hear if you're not feeling at your best. Knowing that there's someone who cares about you and your well-being, too, would help a lot.
However, the minutes tick by and this time Aemond's reply never comes. Nor does it come all weekend.
You're hoping that at college maybe he'll reach out after the brief text exchange, even⌠thank you personally for caring about him, text him or something, you don't even know but you're hoping for something, anything.
But you had to know that he would remain just as distant and cold as always.
Disillusioned, you keep noticing that slight pain he seems to be stuck in but is trying to ignore every time you all get together, without anyone else noticing.
You watch him from a distance, attentive and hopeful, but disappointed that you are unsuccessful in every approach to him to initiate a conversation.
Even after the two of you spoke by message, he has no interest in talking to you in person. And he barely notices your presence, as if you weren't even there.
That hurt you, but you understood that it was about what's going on in his mind and whatever it is that has him so depressed, not because you were really the problem.
So during a meeting on campus waiting for the next class to start, everyone discusses their weekend plans.
âThere's a party tonight at the Martell frat house,â Cregan announces excitedly, âIt's going to be great, they always know how to make a good scandal.â
Everyone begins to agree to attend, sharing laughs and jokes about the last time they went to a Martell party, even Alysanne and Sara, already planning their outfits for the night, except for you and Aemond.
Parties aren't your favorite place, though you've been to several before and always manage to have a good time with help from the girls. And Aemond being quiet catches Jason's attention.
âYou'll come, won't you?â he asks him as he gives him a friendly tap on the shoulder.
He shrugs, starting to take a cigarette from his pocket along with the lighter, not caring at all about the subject of the party.
âI don't know.â
Jason frowns, watching him blankly.
âYou don't know?â
âWho doesn't know?â inquires Cregan instantly, listening intently and confused.
Jason points it out but Aemond nonchalantly lights his cigarette, while you watch the interaction of the three of them, but always focus entirely on him.
âBut you always come over,â Cregan tells him just as confused as Jason.
âIt'll be fun,â Jason continues, âBesides, it's Friday night. What else could you be doing?â
âI don't really feel like going to a party,â he says, just as nonchalant as before.
âOh, come on,â Jason urges, âWe deserve it, you especially after the hell of projects we've had to submit. We need to de-stress.â
âAnd besides you'll be with us, what can go wrong?â says Cregan to him with his tone full of optimism, trying to convince him.
âEverything,â he tells him in his equally soft and low tone of voice as always, causing a chuckle between both boys.
âBut it'll be fun, come on.â
He focuses his gaze on an unimportant point and you, listening to the conversation intently, feel that little spark in your chest lingering, watching him hopefully for him to say yes.
Then you decide to add your voice to convince him.
âYou should come,â you say, catching the attention of the three of them, with your shy but firm look and voice, âIt might be a good distraction and it will help you clear your mind.â
Not exactly the best words but you try and feel your heart start to beat fast in your chest from nerves as you watch his eye meet yours.
But it doesn't last too long as Cregan speaks again.
âYeah, dude. Let's all go together. I don't think you'll get bored but if you do, we can always leave early or switch parties, whichever is better.â
The three of them watch him expectantly for his response, to which he is a little overwhelmed by the attention. But he finally lets out a resigned sigh, feeling the weight of his friends' expectations, and nods slowly, lowering his gaze and refocusing on his cigarette.
âFine,â he says in a low but determined voice. âBut don't expect me to stay all night.â
The answer sparks a small celebration between Cregan and Jason, who pat him on the back and you avoid smiling big, pursing your lips.
âGreat! That's all we asked for, mate.â
âIt'll be fun, you'll see.â
Everyone else speaks again, except for him and you, as you stare at him for a brief moment, feeling the spark of hope grow bigger inside you.
Tonight may be the opportunity you need to reach out and create connection with him. Besides, it's a party, everyone will be relaxed and surely he will be too, so you can't miss the opportunity.
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The night arrives and with it, the anticipation of the party at the Martell fraternity house.
As you approach the imposing house you notice the pulsating lights and vibrant music that can be heard from yards away, promising a fun and energetic night. With Alysanne and Sara, you see the groups of people talking and laughing at every corner, drinking and smoking.
And as you enter the house, the party is in full bloom, with everyone dancing and having a good time, with the smell of beer, cigarettes and even weed lingering in the air, causing Alysanne and Sara to quickly immerse themselves in the atmosphere, pulling you along with them very excitedly to where everyone is dancing.
The energy around you is contagious and as the minutes pass, you catch yourself laughing and dancing, where your worries momentarily fade away amidst the bright lights and pulsating rhythms, enjoying the moment.
Yet there is still that anticipation in you, that excitement as you look out the front door and in all directions, waiting to see him.
And in the middle of dancing with your friends, singing the songs of the moment at the top of your lungs and enjoying the energy of the whole party, just as your gaze briefly focuses on your surroundings, you finally spot a figure with silver hair moving through the crowd.
With a jolt in your heart, you focus your gaze and recognize Aemond.
He moves with a quiet grace, but his expression is a mixture of discomfort and determination. He weaves his way through the people, his gaze scanning the entire place, as if seeking a refuge or maybe a familiar face.
His posture and energy is oblivious to the frenetic energy of the party with his deliberate movements and nonchalant attitude.
And you continue to watch him, with the hustle and bustle of the party fading around you and focusing entirely on him.
You feel a mixture of relief and happiness at seeing him, relief that he has come and happiness that tonight you will finally be able to get close to him.
Aemond continues to approach the epicenter of the party, when on his way he finally meets Cregan and Jason, who greet him enthusiastically and hand him a drink almost instantly, integrating him into the atmosphere and enveloping him in their conversation.
Over drinks and cigarettes, as well as after some banter and laughter, Aemond finally begins to relax, though his movements are more restrained than the others. He would prefer less noise, but it is a party after all.
And you watch from a distance, seeing how the guys entertain him and integrate him into the party, noticing how his posture relaxes more and his expression softens, holding a bottle of beer in his hand and a cigarette in the other.
You know that now is not the time to get close, you want to let him find his own pace without pressure, so you stay in your place, enjoying the company of your friends and also the whole party.
Afterwards you join your friends for more drinks, they insist on taking pictures and videos together, you dance some more, go to get some fresh air because of how suffocated it is and when you look back towards the guys, Aemond is not there.
Cregan and Jason are there with some girls, but he especially is nowhere to be seen. You begin to feel a twinge of unease and start to move slyly through the crowd, looking for his familiar figure.
Until you decide to approach and ask for him or else you'll never be able to find him among all the people already at the party and the people still still entering the house.
âHey,â you approach towards them, with a relaxed attitude, trying to look casual, âWhere's Aemond? I saw him arrive earlier.â
Cregan turns to you, smiling, while Jason blinks several times as if trying to remember.
âOh, yeah, he went out a few minutes ago.â
âI think that way,â Cregan points to the backyard with a nod, âMaybe he needed air or something, he said he'd be back soon.â
You decide to look for him discreetly, making your way through all the students, but the house is full, even more so than it was a few moments ago, with the heat and bustle starting to make you feel overwhelmed.
You think to yourself that he probably went to the bathroom, but minutes pass and being with the girls, you keep looking for him but he's nowhere to be seen.
And that's when you think about the possibility that he has decided to leave.
This leaves you with an empty feeling in your chest and you look around, letting out a long breath and inevitably already starting to feel disappointed.
You continue to scan the place in hope, but minutes pass and there is no sign of him at all.
âHey,â Alysanne calls out to you, âWhat's up?â she watches you intently and with a soft smile on her lips.
âOh⌠n-nothing,â you act casual, âI just need to go to the bathroom,â you point out, âI'll be right back, okay?â
âYou want me to come with you?â
âNo, no, don't worry, it's fine,â you assure her instantly.
Again you make your way through the students and head towards the stairs, hoping to find an empty room or a space with fewer people, since you don't really need to go to the bathroom.
At this point you already feel too overwhelmed with the music and all the people that keep arriving, making it impossible to walk. So you just want to breathe and have some peace and quiet.
Fortunately the corridors on the second floor are not so crowded, there are people, yes, but nothing like down there and you try to open the doors, cautious of course, afraid of interrupting some compromising scene.
Until finally the last door opens and it's an empty room, clearly decorated with the personal touch of one of the frat boys.
You sigh and close the door behind you, stepping inside, barely hearing the sound of music up to here and all the chaos. You plop down on the edge of the bed, trying to calm your mind and feeling the tension in your feet give way after all that dancing.
The minutes pass and although you try to distract yourself with anything on your phone, again the disappointment invades you and so does the thought, without being able to help it.
You have failed to keep in touch with Aemond and at this rate, it seems you will never succeed.
He is quite an enigma, very reserved, indifferent to the attentions that many girls in college would long to receive from him and that is what confuses you.
You think of his brother Aegon, whose behavior is the complete opposite.
Aegon adores the attention of girls, his adventures are scattered all over campus and yet, Aemond is a mystery, so secretive that even a simple friendship with him seems out of reach.
And these differences between the two brothers only add another layer of confusion to your feelings for Aemond. You can't help but wonder why someone like him, so aloof and closed off, appeals to you so much.
He won't even give you the time of day, he barely acknowledges your existence when you're in a group with the guys, his gaze barely rests on you, and whenever you try to talk to him, he barely responds and then brushes you aside with an indifference that leaves you feeling completely invisible.
Then why? Why do you keep trying?
You don't even know.
You get up and start walking slowly around the room, trying to calm your thoughts, not really knowing what to do.
You think maybe you should go back to your dorm, since you really don't want to go back down there with all the people and the commotion. But you know that Alysanne and Sara are still enjoying themselves and you leave alone.
You sit back down on the bed and run a hand across your forehead, letting out a sigh, when suddenly, the bedroom door opens and you look up almost instantly.
And then your heart leaps with anticipation and surprise.
Aemond appears under the threshold, his eye meeting yours and you both stand for a moment motionless, saying nothing.
He scans your face and the room as well, while you continue to stare at him in surprise, definitely not expecting him to appear here at all. And there's something particularly in his gaze that tells you he's also looking for shelter from the party. When again his gaze focuses on you.
"I'm sorry," he says to you, in a low, unconcerned voice, "I didn't know anyone was here."
You say nothing for a few seconds, but force yourself to react.
"It's okay," you say quickly, trying to sound calm, "Don't worry."
Again the anticipation grows inside you, this time stronger, mingling with unexpected joy.
He is not gone.
He is here.
And that rekindles the spark of hope in you, which makes you strive to keep your expression relaxed and less surprised, trying to look completely casual and act normal.
A silence settles between you, one that is both awkward and full of potential, to which you try to speak but Aemond speaks first, taking a step back and with his hand still on the knob.
"Am I bothering you?" he asks, his gaze studying you.
"No, not at all," you reply immediately, your words coming out a little more hastily than you intended.
This instantly embarrasses you and you lower your gaze for a moment, clearing your throat.
"I mean, no," you say more relaxed and in a soft tone, "It's okay if you stay. You're not bothering me," you offer him a small, tight-lipped smile, "I guess you want to hide for a while."
He looks out into the hallway, seeming to consider your words for a moment, then lets out a sigh, again watching you and finally enters the room with soft steps, closing the door behind him.
"From Cregan and Jason specifically."
You let out a small chuckle under your breath, wanting to create that light and easy atmosphere between the two of you by being open and relaxed with him so as to get him to loosen up a bit more with you.
You remain seated on the bed, as he walks over to the window and begins to pull his pack of cigarettes out of his jacket pocket along with his lighter.
With a deft movement, he lights the cigarette, where the small flame briefly illuminates his features before a ball of smoke dissipates into the room.
He opens the window and all the commotion outside is heard more clearly, but not enough for both of you to feel annoyed with it, feeling the night air come in to envelop you.
And you continue to sit, trying not to watch him too much, though it's impossible, he is Aemond Targaryen after all.
Still you search for something to say as he stands in a casual pose by the window, smoking and watching the night sky.
"Are you all right?" you ask finally, breaking the silence, your tone soft and gentle, not wanting to seem intrusive.
He nods, not watching you, with the smoke from the cigarette wafting around his face.
"Yeah," he replies in a distant tone, but you notice how thoughts keep running through his mind, "I'm fine."
You omit to let out a long sigh as you gently bite the inside of your cheek and watch him silently for a moment, thinking of something else to say.
Even he doesn't feel your gaze on him, where you silently admire his straight profile, his set jaw, the high cheekbones, the line of his nose, his lips... all his completely beautiful features and so ethereal.
And yet, all those beautiful features have a weight of sadness and tension, where you can see how a tide of thoughts cross his mind that seemingly only you can notice.
You see his barely-there frown and the tension in his jaw, lost in thought, with the cigarette slowly burning away between his long fingers.
You are torn between remaining silent or trying to break the ice surrounding it. You know that your words must be carefully chosen, not pushing but showing your genuine concern.
So you think your words through very carefully and finally decide to take a chance, hoping that your sincerity might do something, anything.
"I've noticed you've been... distant lately," you say, in a soft voice, "More than usual."
He doesn't respond right away, but you notice a slight tension in his shoulders. He takes a deep drag from his cigarette before exhaling slowly, his gaze still fixed on some point beyond the window, as if he's searching for answers in the dark.
Finally, he shakes his head and again responds without looking at you.
"It's nothing, just..." he is quiet for a moment, "Nothing that really matters to anyone."
Your eyebrows furrow slightly and you feel compelled to speak without thinking too much.
"It matters to me," you say in a soft tone, your gaze fixed on him, trying to let him see the sincerity in your eyes.
He slowly turns to you, finally watching you, his expression suddenly alert. There is a mixture of curiosity and anticipation on his face.
"And why would that be?" he asks you, his tone serious and slightly defensive, his frown showing his confusion, clearly not believing your words, "You don't even know me, nor I you."
The words that have come out of you so spontaneously now leave you vulnerable, but you can't back down. You feel a slight blush creep up your cheeks, but you try to stand firm even in your words.
"We're part of the same group of friends," you reply softly, your gaze fixed on him, trying to keep your composure, "We don't talk much, it's true, but I still care about you. Just like I care about everyone else."
He doesn't say anything to you right away. From a distance, he just stands there, watching you. The dim light in the room outlines the lines of his face in soft shadows.
You try not to look away from him, despite how overly intimidated and nervous you feel. And then, as if he is evaluating your words, he looks away and you see a small but visible smile curving his lips, to again raise the cigarette towards them.
"Is that so?" he murmurs and then takes a drag.
You find the scene hypnotic. The way he smokes. A simple action making him look so sexy.
And realizing you're making progress here, when you hadn't even seen him smile the way he just did, you decide to continue to be honest.
"I'm here for you Aemond, I mean it," you murmur, without hesitation, feeling the warmth of your own words. "Either way."
You watch him stare out the window for a few moments, taking another drag on his cigarette and then, he turns fully towards you.
His eye watches you with intensity and you see how there is an indecipherable glint. He tilts his head slightly, watching as he slowly sweeps his gaze over you, igniting all your alerts in you.
Still, you hold his gaze, despite the way he seems to evaluate you and make you feel exposed. He searches for the truth in your every word, as if he's waiting for you to take it back, to hesitate and consider what you're telling him.
But you don't.
Then, with the cigarette slowly burning between his fingers, with a nonchalant movement, he stubs it out against a piece of furniture in the room. And then, he moves slowly and precisely, towards you.
One step. Another step. And another. Each one filling the space between you until the distance is minimal. Until you feel his proximity and your skin bristles, before he even touches you.
Enraptured, you slowly raise your gaze to him as he steps in front of you. His knees brush lightly against yours and his fragrance envelops you, a faint mixture of cigarettes and his cologne that smells too good and intoxicating.
Your heart begins to beat quite hard and fast in your chest, not understanding what is going on. But you don't want it to end.
And being like this, in this way, makes everything even more interesting. You continue to sit on the edge of the bed, while he stands in front of you, looking at your face more closely.
The silence stretches and you see the curve of his lips lift slightly as he sees no hesitation in you. And when he speaks, his voice is low, deep and soft, infused with something that sends a shiver down your spine.
"Either way?"
His words aren't just a question. They are a challenge. A provocation.
And you don't look away, as you watch him with your big eyes, not backing down. And then, you nod.
The blue of his eye seems to darken with your response, as if you've ignited something inside him. Then, he lifts a hand and with exasperating slowness, directs it to your face and his long fingers brush your cheek.
Holding your breath, you watch him curiously and attentively, as he tests the ground, your reaction. And then his caress becomes firmer. His fingers run along the line of your jaw, slowly ascending to tangle at the base of your hair.
His thumb slides to the corner of your lips, tracing the contour with a softness that contrasts with the intensity of his gaze, while you have to remind yourself how to breathe.
"Then say it," he murmurs, leaning in just barely.
Your throat feels dry. Your lips part, watching him completely mesmerized and unable to believe this is really happening. Your words get stuck, because in this moment, with Aemond so close, with his touch igniting every part of your body, you realize there's no turning back.
"Either way," you assure him in a soft, slightly trembling voice.
"And how far does either way go?"
He holds your gaze, that blue eye burning and as if he can see right through you, something dangerous and exciting.
His hand on your face is firm, but his thumb keeps tracing slow circles at the corner of your lips, almost in a distracted, shuddering caress. He is waiting, testing you.
"As far as you need," you murmur, without hesitation.
He tilts his head and suddenly, his free hand takes your arm, making you rise from the bed as his hand on your cheek is firmer, keeping you right where he wants you.
"So any way I need?" he murmurs, a barely raspy, enveloping whisper that seems to filter through your skin.
He leans in, until you feel his nose brush against yours. And you close your eyes for a moment, trying to contain the whirlwind of emotions he's nothing short of unleashing in you.
"Yes," you say in a whisper, trying to stand on your own two feet.
Suddenly his hand on your waist grips you firmly and tightly, holding you in his orbit with an ease that takes your breath away. There is no pressure, no urgency, just a silent possession that feels more dangerous than any words.
He leans closer to you, his face descending in a movement so slow it almost seems deliberate, as if he wants to lengthen the moment, as if he's enjoying the way your breath hitches, in how your lips barely part, in the way your pupils dilate as the space between you disappears.
His breath, warm with the faint trace of cigarette and mint, mingles with yours. Until his lips brush yours in a touch so ephemeral that it seems like an illusion.
A silent provocation. It's not an immediate kiss. No. He takes his time, brushing his mouth over yours torturously slow, as if giving you a chance to pull away, to stop him.
But you don't. Because you don't want to. Because you want him, so badly.
And when your body leans slightly into him, a sigh escapes your mouth before you can avoid it, needing him. And that seems to be all he needs, because then, you feel it.
His lips slide over yours with devastating precision, trapping you in a kiss that leaves no room to breathe. His hand on your cheek holds you by the back of your neck, while the hand on your waist pulls you closer to him.
He closes in a little more, tilting your face towards him as his other hand slowly slides down your waist, drawing you closer, eliminating any chink of space between your bodies.
The kiss intensifies as his tongue brushes against yours, soft, teasing, exploring with a patience and assurance that makes you shiver. Aemond does not rush. There is no desperation in his touch, just something darker, deeper, as if he wants to memorize your every reaction, every tremor of your body beneath his.
Then it's deeper and more demanding.
You have to cling to his shirt, to the folds of fabric between your fingers, because suddenly you're not sure you can stand without him.
And when he finally pulls away, just a little, just enough to look at you with that fiery blue eye, lips parted and breath hitching, you know nothing will ever be the same again.
"Tell me again," he murmurs against your lips, his forehead touching yours.
With your heart racing, you manage to hold his gaze and find the words to speak, when all you want to do is keep kissing him.
"I'm here for you, Aemond," you say, your tone soft, but confident, "Either way," you complete, without a hint of hesitation.
His gaze darkens. And then, he kisses you again.
And from that moment, that's when it all began. But only when you were alone.
There were no words about it, no questions, no explanations. The next day, Aemond behaved the same as always: serious, distant, impenetrable when you were surrounded by people.
There were no glances, no brushes, no hint that anything had happened the night before. But at some point in the night, he showed up. A short message.
A silent signal that gave way to the change in your relationship with him.
The first time you went to his apartment, there was no doubt or hesitation. He opened the door without a word and you walked in, feeling the warmth of his gaze following you closely. There were no words other than cordial ones and then there was no more preamble.
His way of touching you was firm, decisive, as if he had known you forever, as if he knew exactly what to do to make everything else disappear.
And in those moments, with his breath brushing against your skin and his hands roaming your body, you understood what this was.
It was just sex. But, surprisingly, there was something more.
Something that wasn't said out loud, but it was there, in the way his fingers lingered on your skin after it was all over. He wasn't asking you to stay, but he wasn't asking you to leave either. And somehow, that was enough.
That's how the dynamic between you began.
There were no explicit rules, but the boundaries were clear. The relationship was not based solely on desire, though.
When the two of you were alone, Aemond wasn't his usual self. He wasn't the cold, serious man everyone knew. With you, when the door closed and the world was outside, his expression changed. His barriers would crumble, if only for a moment.
There were nights when, after all, he would simply lie beside you, tangling his fingers in your hair in silence. He would tell you things he never told anyone, fragments of his mind that he rarely shared. And so did you with him.
It wasn't that he was affectionate, for Aemond is not that kind of person. But in the quiet of the night, when you were alone, he allowed himself to be something more than the impenetrable man everyone thought they knew.
In public, however, nothing changed.
He didn't ignore you, but he didn't treat you differently either. If you shared a room with others, he was the same old Aemond: observant, reserved, with an expression no one could read.
There were no signs of what went on when you were alone. It wasn't that he was ashamed of what you had, but he wasn't interested in letting the world know either.
And there were times when you wondered if this was enough for you. If you could go through with this, whatever it was, that existed only in the shadows. The doubt kept you up most of the night and distracted in your classes.
But then, there came the moments that made you forget those doubts.
When he had you against the wall or under his body, his mouth claiming yours with deep, electrifying movements, demanding and possessive.
There was tenderness in the small gestures, in the way he ran his fingers down your back after all, in the way he tucked a lock of your hair behind your ear before kissing you again.
But all that only existed when it was just the two of you.
A delicate balance between what was allowed and what was not. A secret kept within four walls, where Aemond allowed himself to be more than just the man everyone knew. Where you are one of the few people he allows to see him as he really is.
And that, for now, is enough for you.
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âGods, Aemond.â
The sensation of his wet tongue exploring your pussy takes over every part of your mind and body. Your fingers grip his hair as your hips begin to roll into his face, unable to contain yourself and unable to stop the moans that escape your lips.
You let your head fall back against his pillow, closing your eyes and furrowing your brows in pleasure as you feel his lips suck and lick your clit.
Your thighs rest against his shoulders, as his arms spread you even wider for him, letting him see all of you. He feasts, tasting his saliva and your juices, unable to get enough of you.
Your whole body writhes, having no escape from his grip, as your moans and the sound of his tongue working on you fill his room. When a suck on your clit especially makes you shudder, feeling the reach of your orgasm sooner than you expected.
âOh myâfuck, I'm gonna come,â you gasp, warning quickly.
âYeah?â he asks you, pulling slightly away from your pussy, âAre you close, baby?â
You can't speak, just nod.
Then you throw your head back hard, moaning as his tongue finds its way through all your wetness again and one of his fingers enters you, further stimulating the arrival of your orgasm.
âOh, fuck! Yes, Aemâ
He watches you from where he is, still eating you, delighting in your expression and the way you squirm.
You bring both of your hands up to hold your breasts tightly, biting your lips and moaning loudly, feeling the heated pleasure hit you with intensity. He keeps sucking you, prolonging your orgasm, while you moan and see stars behind your eyes.
The perfect scene to make his cock harder.
He gives you one last kiss on your clit as you calm down and he moves up your body, bringing one of his hands to one of your breasts, cupping it and kneading it firmly.
His face leans toward you and he kisses you, letting you taste your flavor as he has so many times before. You feel dizzy, exhausted and overheated. But you know none of this ends here.
So you open your arms, embracing him as he makes room between your legs, never stopping kissing you.
âSo pretty. So good for me,â he whispers against your lips with desire.
Hot and heavy, Aemond presses his cock against you, pressing it deliciously against your clit. You furrow your brows and gasp, still feeling the weight of your earlier, intense orgasm.
But you want more, more of him.
âPlease,â you moan, rolling your hips against him, âI want you to fuck me.â
âYeah? You want that?â
Everything about him is intoxicating, enthralling, dazzling and hypnotic. You don't think clearly. Much less in sex. So you just nod, needing more of him. Your pussy clenches around nothing and it frustrates you, so you grind your hips harder against his cock.
âDon't worry. I'm going to fuck you just right,â he tells you then leaves a soft kiss on your cheek.
Agitated, you watch as he removes his boxers and his hard cock slams against his lower abdomen. Big, pale and hot.
He reaches over to his nightstand drawer, grabbing a condom. He puts it on quickly and brings the tip to your folds, wetting it with your juices and slowly opening you for him.
The contact makes you shudder and you cling to his shoulders as he slowly begins to open you up. The sensation invades you almost instantly, intoxicating you, as he fills you to the hilt.
You watch him with your mouth open, as his eye bores into yours and he drops down for a moment to watch perfectly as the two of you join, hissing, staying still afterwards to give you time to adjust.
You've felt it many times before, it's not new, you can take it in completely. Yet it feels like the first time, every time.
And then, he begins his gentle back and forth, moving in and out of you slowly, at the same time burying his face in your neck, sighing as he feels your perfect pussy squeeze him.
âOh fuck,â he gasps in your ear, sending shivers through your body, âSqueezing me so fucking tight. Feels so good. So deep in your pretty pussy.â
âFeels good. So good, Aemond.â
Then, he begins to penetrate you with steadier movements, deep and hard.
The air leaves your lungs, as you cling to his shoulders and hug him against you as you feel his warm breath against your neck each time he thrusts inside you again.
You whimper, feeling him keep up the steady rhythm, making you bite your lip at the delicious sensation that soothes the need you feel deep inside you.
âOh Gods,â you moan, âOh yes.â
His onslaught is faster and more energetic, penetrating you harder.
âThat's it, baby. Wrap your legs around my torso,â he commands you in a soft, but firm, deep voice, full of lust.
And you do, desperate to feel him deeper inside you. The sound of skin against skin along with moans and gasps are all you hear in the room.
âYeah, just like that,â he croons in your ear, âGood girl. Just for me.â
All he gets from you is that you squeeze his cock harder. And he speeds up his movements, as he steals your breath with each thrust.
Aemond grunts and leans in a little, raising one hand to grab the edge of the bed's backrest for support to hit your exact spot with more precision and you whimper, arching your back at the delicious sensation.
He watches your every expression pleased, digging his fingers even deeper into the wood and with his other hand your skin, enjoying your pretty sounds that you make only for him.
âAemond,â you moan.
Resting your head on the pillow and moaning without caring about anything else, you collapse. You tremble beneath him, your eyes roll back in your head, and you explode with an intensity stronger than your previous orgasm.
Feeling the way you squeeze him, he speeds up his movements, his thrusts faster and harder, reaching his own orgasm. He grunts and buries his face in your neck, grabbing one of your breasts hard as he cums inside you.
He curses, as he drops his body on top of you, breathing hard and his pulse too fast.
Then, complete silence.
Neither of you say or do anything. You both try to regulate your breathing and calm down from the high. Then, he leaves a soft kiss on your cheek, with his hand holding your face to then begin a brief trail of kisses to your lips. He kisses you deeply and finally leaves a last kiss on your forehead.
It feels like heaven and everything about him completely consumes you. It drugs you and floods you in the way you don't want it to stop. And you deeply wish time would stop so you can enjoy the moment forever.
But then, he gets off of you and lies down next to you letting out a sigh. And suddenly, coldness. There is no more affection or the warmth he used to give you.
You cover yourself with the sheets and watch him almost out of the corner of your eye. You want to get close to him, to hug him and have him make you feel safe and well cared for after the act of intimacy, like before.
But before you even try anything, he reaches over and takes from his nightstand a cigarette, lighting it. He makes himself comfortable in his own way and takes drags while staring at the ceiling or a spot in the room.
You bite your lips and look away from him, having no idea what to say.
The smoke reaches your nostrils and you both stay like that, existing, saying and doing nothing for a few long minutes. Then you see the time and it's late.
It's dangerous for you to go home by yourself, even in an Uber. And by his behavior, you doubt that he will tell you that you can stay or that he will drive you home.
You don't want to be later so you let out a long breath and without looking at him, you sit up with the sheets on your chest and start looking for your clothes.
"Where are you going?"
His question surprises you and catches you off guard instantly, so you turn to look at him a little uncertainly as you tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear.
"It's late. I should be going."
He checks the time too and watches you with a frown.
"Don't you want to stay?"
"Hum... I don't know," you shrug, "You want me to?"
"Yeah," he says nonchalantly, "You've stayed many times before."
"Yeah, I know, but... I don't know. I thought you didn't want me to stay this time."
He holds his frown as you watch him exhale smoke from between his parted lips, making a confused gesture with his head.
"Why not?"
"I don't know. I just thought about it," you shake your head, averting your gaze from him.
You feel his gaze on you as you bend over and pull on your shirt so you don't sleep completely naked. And he doesn't even tell you to wear his, like he used to a time ago.
He used to tell you that he loved seeing how his shirts looked on you and now... nothing.
"I'll drive you home in the morning. Don't worry," he tells you in that again nonchalant and... distant tone.
"Yeah," you murmur, turning to lie down next to him.
He lasts a few more minutes smoking his cigarette staring at the ceiling and nothing else, while you silently watch the features of his handsome face and the movements he makes with his hand and cigarette.
Finally he stubs out and throws what little is left of it in the trash, then turns off the lamp and begins to settle in next to you. He leans towards you, puts an arm behind your head and pulls your body towards him to sleep together, as before.
You place your head between his chest and neck as he wraps both arms around you and rests his head on yours, releasing a long breath to finally fall asleep.
For a moment, the action and the way you both are comforts you. His closeness and the way he holds you, makes you feel safe, comfortable, warm and makes those butterflies flutter in your stomach.
But you notice the little differences.
His touch is different, his nonchalant and distant attitude is transmitted through his movements and this... it felt like a mechanical movement, a movement caused by habit and almost forced.
It's like he has to, not because he really wants to. There are no little kisses or little caresses before bedtime while he holds you. Nothing. He doesn't make you feel the way he used to.
But at least he holds you.
And you settle for that, still with sadness in your heart and with the feeling that something has changed and you don't know what it is but, it gives you a bad feeling.
At least he's still doing these little things that used to make you happy. But... again, it's not like before.
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You prepare breakfast for Aemond and yourself.
You woke up earlier than usual just so you could prepare a decent breakfast for him so he wouldn't go to class on an empty stomach.
You know that his classes start earlier in the day compared to yours and you have been listening to him take a shower for a while and now he is probably finishing getting ready to leave.
A few minutes ago you received messages from Sara asking you where you will celebrate your birthday tomorrow. You just had to tell her a place and she and the guys will take care of the rest.
You feel visibly excited about it. Although Aemond hasn't talked to you about any of that but... you are hopeful.
At that moment he appears down the hallway, ready to go to class, heading quickly towards the living room where his backpack is, shooting you a brief glance.
"What are you doing?"
"I made breakfast," you tell him, making him coffee the way he likes it.
"I don't have time," he tells you hurriedly, not even looking at you.
That makes you stop and look at him confused.
You shouldn't either, in fact, they are little things that anyone would tell you are unimportant but... you notice them and it sets off another alarm in you.
"Aren't you going to have breakfast?" you ask him confused.
"No."
"But you always eat breakfast even if you're late."
"I can't now, Y/N. My first class is important," he tells you again with that coldness and almost... annoyance.
You watch him for a few seconds without saying anything. And then you watch all the breakfast ready in front of you as you bite the inside of your cheek, again feeling that bad feeling and discomfort running inside your body.
"Go get changed so I can drop you off at the dorm in passing," he tells you, "I don't have much time. We have to go now."
Surprisingly you don't want to.
Normally you would have accepted without even hesitating but now...you feel like you're annoying him and you don't want to do that with this too. Besides, he looks very rushed.
"Don't worry. I'll take the bus," you say without emotion, leaving everything on the table and heading towards his room to change.
"As you wish," he says behind you, unconcerned.
A sharp pain settles in your chest and you try to control yourself, not wanting to overthink things, even though you are already doing so.
With the sadness inside you, taking your time, you change and improve your appearance just a little. Normally you would have taken a shower here too but now you don't want to do any of that. You just want to go home.
You're barely finishing putting on your pants when you see him appear under the door frame with his backpack on his shoulder.
"Hey," he says to you in a surprisingly soft tone compared to a few seconds ago, "What are you doing tomorrow afternoon?"
"Huh?" you look at him confused and attentive.
"Do you have plans tomorrow afternoon?"
You think about it for a moment, not expecting his question.
"Hum... no, not yet. In the night it's just the hanging out with the guys."
"Yeah, I know. But I thought we could do something the two of us before we go meet them."
And then, again that little hope appears and every ugly feeling from before is replaced.
My birthday.
You think instantly, feeling hopeful and excited. Surely he has a surprise for you and everything you were thinking before about his attitude and behavior, surely it's just because he has a lot to do regarding his classes and it really has nothing to do with you.
"Like what?"
He puts on a small half smile.
"Just be ready at six. I'll call you and pick you up."
"Oh, okay. Yeah, sure," you nod, smiling softly.
"Okay," he murmurs, "I'll see you later, then."
"Yeah. Drive safe."
He leaves and eventually so do you, it being a common routine where you know how to secure the door to his apartment when you're the last to leave.
Despite attending to your classes and work, you couldn't help but think of a thousand ways and things to do where Aemond will probably surprise you.
You didn't talk to him for the rest of the day. You texted him once you got to your residence and your day was almost over but he didn't respond.
Then you took a shower, finished some chores and watched a new episode of the show you are currently watching. Every once in a while you couldn't help but check your phone to see if you got a message from him or if he called you, but nothing.
Until eventually you fell asleep.
And the next morning, when you wake up, it's your birthday.
You get lots of messages and congratulations from your friends. Sara tags you on many Instagram stories wishing you a happy birthday. Other of your classmates also congratulate you and you spend part of the morning smiling and replying messages.
You FaceTime with your parents and family members you haven't seen in months. Even though the vacations are fast approaching, you've already made plans with Aemond to stay with him.
You receive more congratulations from cousins, aunts and uncles, you also talk to your grandparents and answer more messages from your friends.
Until you look for a specific person, there is nothing. Aemond hasn't texted or called you. The message you sent him yesterday he hasn't even seen it and that seems weird to you.
But the day is just starting so there is still plenty of time.
You also remember that he has something prepared for you this afternoon, so you look forward to whatever it will be. You know he will text or call you later.
You get ready and choose an outfit that makes it clear that this is your special day. You do waves in your hair and make your makeup a little more bold. Finally you apply lip gloss and head to campus.
You meet your classmates, they give you their best wishes, your professors also congratulate you on your birthday and your day is potentially going great.
Still, the hours pass and Aemond still hasn't contacted you.
That seems weird to you. But it's still early. So you follow the corresponding schedule of your classes and keep your mind busy for a couple more hours.
You finally get an hour's break and take a seat at one of the tables outside in one of the many gardens on campus. You pick up your phone and frown when you see that Aemond still hasn't texted you.
Confused, and just to put your mind at ease, you decide to text him yourself, asking if he's okay. But the messages don't reach him, confusing you and drawing your attention even more.
Either he has no signal wherever he is or his phone is turned off, which is very weird.
You tell yourself that surely he must be busy and will call you soon. You mean... he has to, right? It's your birthday and he has a plan for the two of you in a few more hours.
At that moment, you run into Jason, Cregan and Sara, who lock you in a tight group hug, congratulating you on your birthday and making a bit of a fuss.
"How's the birthday girl doing?" Jason asks you, smiling.
"Great," you assure him.
"Did you get any presents?" asks Sara.
"Mmm⌠yes, from some classmates," you reply with a small soft smile, "My mom also send a video with my little brothers. We promised to celebrate when I see them on vacation," you pause for a moment, hesitating if you should ask what's really on your mind.
But finally, you decide to do it in the most casual way possible.
"Oh and... have either of you seen Aemond?"
"I haven't," says Sara.
"I called him but sent me straight to mailbox," says Cregan.
"I think I saw him heading toward that building," Jason points out, "About two hours ago."
So he did come to class.
That's what your mind immediately thinks. But you don't understand what's going on with his phone.
"Yet he said he's going to the pub later," Cregan says.
"Yeah, that's where the whole group will finally be together," agrees Sara cheerfully.
Well, at least you know he's okay. And if he doesn't text or call you, you're sure he'll pick you up at your dorm like he said he would.
You linger for a few more moments chatting with the guys until eventually everyone heads off to their next class, hours pass and you finally finish your classes.
You quickly head to your residence to touch up your makeup and put on another outfit. You have exactly half an hour until six o'clock and Aemond arrives.
You put on your playlist of the moment and undecidedly start looking at all the outfits that are for the whole occasion. You don't know where Aemond will take you so you want to be prepared in case of anything.
You also make sure of your lingerie.
You recently bought a couple of new outfits and now seems like the time to break in a new one.
With Aemond it's almost a law that you'll both find the time wherever it is to obviously do... that. He's insatiable and goes crazy over every new outfit you put on and you really want to surprise him.
You finally finish getting ready and look at the time on your phone, it's exactly six o'clock. And excited, you wait for him.
Usually Aemond is very punctual. The time he says he will arrive, he arrives exactly at that time. But ten long, eternal minutes go by and he doesn't show up. And that really seems very weird to you.
Then fifteen, twenty minutes and he still doesn't show up.
If something got in his way, he would usually let you know. But you don't get a text or a call from him. So you decide to call him yourself.
Finally the call comes in and you wait for him to answer, relieved that his phone has a signal or is on, whatever happened. But he doesn't answer.
You call again, nothing. And again, nothing. Bewildered, you text him, telling him you're waiting for him. But nothing, he doesn't answer, doesn't tell you anything, doesn't even read them.
You start anxiously moving your foot up and down and call him a couple more times, but he doesn't answer. And that's what happens for over an hour, waiting for him to call you or say something, anything, but nothing.
Feelings of disappointment, sadness and anger wash over you. You plop down on your bed and continue to stare at your phone waiting for something, anything, with a bitter look on your face. But, again and as lately, nothing.
He hasn't even said happy birthday. He hasn't said anything at all. And the plan for both of you, completely forgotten.
When then, a terrible realization begins to dawn on you.
He maybe...?
No.
You immediately say to yourself, in denial.
He hasn't forgotten your birthday. He wouldn't do that. He wouldn't do that to you. He couldn't.
Frustrated, you let out a long breath as the thought begins to creep deeper and deeper into your mind. Not leaving you alone and wanting to convince you that's exactly what happened. Or else he would have responded to your message from this morning and you both would be together right now.
But you tell yourself that maybe something happened. Something he didn't plan for. Maybe something important and he can't communicate it now, but eventually he will.
You're sure he wouldn't do something like this to you, so it must be something unexpected and important.
You chase away all the negative things you're thinking and think about Cregan saying he's going to the pub anyway. You know that right there he'll give you an explanation and make it up to you, you're pretty sure.
So you wait for the time you agreed to show up at the pub with Sara, all the time still hoping to hear something from Aemond, anything. But nothing.
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Finally he arrives.
His arrival completely steals your attention. You watch as he enters the pub with a completely disinterested and... resigned look on his face. As if he doesn't really want to be here.
This gets your attention even more but in front of the others, you hide it and don't immediately approach him, as if you haven't been waiting for him all this time.
Jason and Cregan literally rush towards him, while you sit there talking to Sara and your other classmates continue to talk and drink.
Sara is talking but you're not really listening to her, as out of the corner of your eye you watch him, talking to the guys with a tense posture and a somewhat irritated look on his face.
And after a few minutes, the guys practically drag him over to the table where you are, cheering him on.
The three of them take a seat, he specifically in front of you and all he does is give you and Sara a slight nod of his head in greeting and... that's it.
And that's the point where you finally don't understand anything.
He hasn't even said happy birthday to you. Nor does he give you the signal to both speak privately. He doesn't even seem to have your numerous missed calls and messages you left him in mind.
What's wrong with him?
He's looking all around, until the moment comes when, of course, he takes his lighter and his cigarette and doesn't even glance at you. He doesn't join in the conversation either. He doesn't really do anything.
And you start looking for the perfect opportunity to approach him and ask him to explain himself.
And you think it finally comes when he gets up and says he's going to get a drink, heading with dispassionate movements towards the bar.
But the bar is in plain sight and your drink is still full. So you start taking quick sips to finish it without drawing attention to yourself. Still, you watch him and are more confused when you see him with his back to you typing on his phone, waiting for his drink.
There's no way he hasn't noticed the numerous messages you've left him.
You don't understand why he hasn't spoken to you all day and why he seems to be ignoring you. You just don't understand anything.
And just as you're about to get up to go with him, he returns with drink in hand and a seriousness in his eyes that you haven't seen for a long time. So you last a long time at the table, talking to the guys, waiting for the opportunity that keeps not coming as time goes by.
You also talk to your classmates at the other table and from time to time you watch him, if not all the time, wanting him to look back at you but nothing.
He seems distracted, serious and irritated. Everything about him you can see and notice.
When suddenly he stands up without a word and you watch intently as he heads for the restroom.
The perfect opportunity!
From the tables where everyone is sitting, they can't see the small hallway leading to the restrooms. So you let a few small seconds pass, act all normal and casual, and finally get up and tell Sara that you will go to the restroom and will be back in a moment.
You do everything normal, although you don't really do anything inside the restroom, except stand at the entrance and listen attentively for the moment when the men's restrooms door opens so you can go out and bump into him.
And that's what you do the moment you hear the door open, hoping it's him and not someone else.
And to your good fortune, it's him. And he watches you the instant your figure appears in front of him, both of you stopping your steps.
"Hey," you say a little uncertainly, looking at him slightly confused and with nervousness creeping over you.
And he speaks to you with the most disinterested and cold tone he has ever addressed you with. His gaze cold and distant.
"Hey."
This confuses you even more and you decide to get to the point directly, needing to know what's wrong with him.
"Are you okay?"
He frowns, as if your question is absurd.
"Yeah, why?"
"Well... I haven't heard from you all day. I called you many times and left you several messages, but you didn't get back to me."
Aemond raises an eyebrow, as if he doesn't understand what you're saying and starts pulling his phone out of his pocket, seemingly unconcerned.
"You did?"
"Yes," you say, feeling more lost than ever, "I wait for you."
"For what?"
You stare at him incredulously and with all the bewilderment in your gaze, parting your lips.
"For what?" you repeat, not understanding, "Yesterday you said you'd pick me up at six. You didn't tell me where we were going and so I kept calling and texting you but you never answered. You didn't even let me know you weren't coming," you say looking at him confused, "Something happened or... you forgot?"
The change in his gaze is subtle, but you can see it. Something inside him softens, watching you silently, with realization. And upon seeing your gaze, he averts his gaze full of resignation as he takes a deep breath and runs a hand over his face.
"Fuck," he mutters.
And you watch him the whole time, clearly waiting for an explanation.
"Sorry," he finally says, watching you and his voice deepens, "I forgot. I was busy."
You blink, watching him sadly and uncomprehendingly, frowning at him.
"You forgot?" you repeat in a mumble, shaking your head and shrugging.
"It wasn't intentional," he tells you in a more serious tone, "I was busy and I'm really sorry. I'll make it up to you later, okay?"
But something in his words doesn't convince you, and you continue to stare at him with that look that begs for deeper answers.
"But why would you forget? Where were you?"
"I already told you I was busy."
"Yes but you were the one who told me thatâ
"I know," he cuts you off sharply, "And I forgot because, for the fourth time, I was busy. Now stop making a big deal out of it and stop whining like a little girl."
Pain flashes across your face as you take a step back, bewildered and surprised.
He has never spoken to you this way before. Nor has he ever behaved with you the way he is behaving now. You just don't understand. But then... again that thought comes to your mind as you watch him with your parted lips.
The realization comes and hits you to make you see the reality. And you watch it sadder and more confused than before.
"You don't even know what today is? Did you forget too?" you ask him with your voice cracking in disappointment and disbelief, "I-I... I just... I just wanted to know if you were okay and where you were. And I don't think it's fair thatâ
"Look," he says, interrupting you with a coldness and a look full of annoyance, "Just because we slept together doesn't mean you're my girlfriend Y/N, because you're not. Let's make it fucking clear to you once and for all and stop thinking you have the right to demand explanations from me that I don't have to give you. You're just a convenient fuck and that's all, do you understand?"
His words fall like a weight on your chest and everything around you seems to stop. Your breath catches and your throat closes as you stand there, not knowing what to do and unable to believe what you just heard.
You can't believe he, he, said that.
Not the Aemond who looked at you with that intensity that seemed to promise more, who always found a way to make you feel special, even if it was in the privacy of bed or in the shadows of your moments together.
But here he is, looking at you coldly and honestly, also with some annoyance, as if you were just another problem he doesn't need to solve, but to get rid of. And really meaning every word he says.
You don't say anything. You just can't. The lump in your throat makes it impossible for you to speak and tears burn in your eyes, threatening to fall.
You try to stand firm, but every second that passes is a struggle not to break down in front of him. When then, you hear Sara's voice.
"There you are!"
She exclaims, approaching with a huge smile.
"What are you doing? We're waiting for you. It's time to sing happy birthday."
You don't see it but the confusion in Aemond's eye appears when Sara mentions the word birthday.
And you nod, biting the inside of your cheek, instantly pretending that everything is perfectly fine and you weren't heartbroken just a few seconds ago.
You swallow hard, controlling yourself.
"Yeah, yeah. Let's go."
She takes your arm and leads you along with her towards the table with the candle-decorated cake that all your friends together have bought for you.
Sara also makes sure to place your gifts around for pictures while you take a seat in the middle in full view of everyone and continue to hold your ground.
Aemond eventually approaches the table as well, you feel his closeness without even looking him, at the same time as everyone starts singing for you.
The room is filled with laughter and voices, with the hubbub of your friends singing a rousing and somewhat off-key version of 'happy birthday'. Sara is at your side, smiling radiantly, as the others raise their glasses, animated and happy.
And you... you smile too.
A wide, almost perfect smile that seems to fit the scene. But inside, you feel how every second that passes is like a knife pressing against your heart. An uncomfortable knot forms in your chest as you struggle to keep your composure.
Don't cry. Don't cry now.
You repeat yourself over and over, forcing yourself to keep up the facade. You know your friends are here for you, that they really want to see you happy, but all you can think about are Aemond's words and how he reduced you to something insignificant.
Your hands are tense, clenching the edges of the table as if that will keep you on your feet.
Your jaw aches from pretending so much, from holding back the tears that burn in your eyes. But, fortunately, you're doing a good job and no one notices.
However, you don't know it either but Aemond does.
He has come close enough to see your face. And although at first glance you look radiant, he knows you too well and something in your smile, in your eyes, tells him the truth and that smile is not real.
You don't see it, but you feel his gaze on you, so intense. As he purses his lips and continues to watch the scene, remorse hitting him with a force he didn't expect.
The last chords of the song echo as everyone applauds, cheering and encouraging you to blow out the candles. You take a breath, blinking rapidly to clear any sign of your emotions.
"Go on, make a wish, birthday girl," Sara tells you excitedly.
You lean into the cake, closing your eyes.
Your mind, treacherously, can't help but return to Aemond's words, again feeling the urge to cry. And yet, you make an effort to push those thoughts to the back of your mind, at least for now.
And finally, you blow out the candles.
Applause fills the space again, and you smile as everyone begins to surround you, offering hugs and warm words. When your gaze inevitably meets his.
He's still there, standing a little apart, watching you with a mixture of guilt and something else you can't quite decipher. He doesn't even try to come closer and you're grateful for that, because it's the smartest thing he can do now.
You look away from him and continue to thank them, doing the best thing you know how to do: pretend.
You laugh lightly at a comment from Sara, accept another hug, and even allow someone to smear a bit of frosting from the cake on your nose.
It all seems so normal, so perfect, but you know it's not.
Aemond is still there, motionless, watching you. And even though you try to ignore him, you can feel his gaze burning into you. He knows he has crossed a boundary tonight. He knows he's hurt you and you're like this because of him.
"Happy birthday, Y/N."
One of your classmates says to you as he hugs you. Then someone else hugs you and says the same thing, then another person and another.
But the voice you most longed to hear saying those words to you is absent and the emptiness it leaves weighs heavier than you'd like to admit.
But one thing is guaranteed and that is that you're fucking done.
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After your birthday celebration, you went home earlier than you normally would have stayed to celebrate. But you just couldn't pretend anymore.
Aemond is the one who always takes people who live near him with him in his car. But this time it was Sara who did you the favor after telling her that you appreciated everyone's great gesture for celebrating your day but you weren't feeling well.
You received a couple of texts from him during the ride. Messages you decided not to read or you would end up crying with Sara in her car. So you stood your ground and made a promise to yourself that you wouldn't cry for him once you got to your dorm.
Obviously, you failed.
As soon as you finished taking off your clothes to put on your pajamas and started removing your makeup, inevitably the first tears started to fall. And then, you were a complete mess.
You weren't helped by the fact that his texts kept coming. And you had an idea what they were saying, so the very pain and bitterness deep inside you made you strong enough to not read anything, turn off your phone and go to bed to sleep.
But clearly nothing ended there.
You expected that he would later try to talk to you, no matter what.
So you did what you had never done before when it was about him and what he sometimes did when it was about you; you sent him straight to voicemail and didn't respond to any of his texts for days.
Y/N, please.
I didn't fucking mean it.
I'm sorry.
Can I talk to you?
Call me as soon as you can.
I know you're mad at me but I needed to talk to you, please.
That and more similar texts is what you've been getting these past few days. Days in which you have fortunately managed to avoid him on campus. And not just him, your other friends too or else he'll intercept you with them and you won't have a subtle escape.
And you don't want that.
You don't want to be weak enough in front of him to listen to his justifications and forgive him so easily. What he did to you, what he said to you⌠is not worthy of forgiveness.
You never realized before how insignificant you are to him and how he truly sees you. You are not even a little bit special than you considered him to you.
But that what happened, it broke your heart but it has also opened your eyes. You know you won't be able to hide forever. You also know that eventually meeting Aemond either alone or with people would be inevitable.
Besides, your friends were already starting to notice it weird that they didn't see you around, so you meet up with them in the usual campus gardens and act completely normal.
When Aemond also joins shortly after.
Everyone greets him as normal when he arrives and he greets them back with his usual nonchalant and serious attitude. However, you don't greet him. You don't even look at him.
You take the opportunity to do one of your homework right there, participating in the conversation from time to time but without being involved, just accompanying them and nothing more.
He takes a seat in front of you, where you instantly feel his piercing, burning gaze. You feel him silently begging you to look at him, to give him a chance to talk, to not ignore him anymore. But that's what you do, you ignore him.
âAnd how are your vacation plans going?â asks Cregan.
Inevitably, you tense up at the question. And the memories come back.
âCome with me.â
âWhere to?â
âTo Dragonstone.â
You press your lips together and more purposefully pretend to be completely immersed in your homework, when the truth is you hear the entire conversation.
âWhere are you going?â he asks Jason.
âSunspear, with my whole family.â
âAnd you?â
âI'm going home, Winterfell,â Sara replies.
âWinterfell?â repeats Cregan confused, â You didn't say you were going to the beach?â
âNope. I'll relax in the cabins with hot tubs,â she says with a smug grin, âHow about you?â
âI'll go to the beach, definitely. I'm thinking Runestone.â
They go on to talk about their plans, places and so on. When they ask Aemond and you particularly pay more attention to that.
âYou haven't changed your plans? You're going to Dragonstone?â
And his quiet, soft, nonchalant voice is not long in coming.
âYes.â
And you continue to pretend. Pretending that you're not listening, that it's not a big deal, and that you secretly didn't have the same plan to go with him. And you're so immersed in it, you didn't think about the fact that eventually you'd also be asked the same question.
âWhat about you, Y/N? You said you had plans too.â
Shit.
You try to look like the question hasn't caught you off guard. And you quickly compose yourself. You raise your gaze to them, all but him, and speak with a nonchalant attitude and tone.
âActually⌠no,â you place a soft smile, âI'm going to stay here.â
âOh really?â
âAnd why is that?â
Everyone looks at you in surprise and bewilderment. But, specifically, a burning, piercing eye watches you with more intensity than before and with a annoyance you can feel through your skin. Betrayal and pain, even. And honestly, it bothers you, too.
What was he expecting after what happened?
You try not to let it affect you, pretend he's not even here. And you deliberately ignore him.
âMaybe I'll visit my mom for a week or two,â you explain calmly, âBut I'll stay most of the time here. And that's okay. It's no big deal.â
The guys give you their opinion and invite you to spend the vacations with them, somehow not wanting to leave you behind. But you turn them down politely, thanking them for their concern and saying that what you want is some time to yourself. And they understand.
And then, Aegon appears.
His entrance is, as always, loud and carefree. He wears a wide grin and a mocking twinkle in his eye as he greets everyone.
âAh, look at this boring group alone,â he says, plopping his body down next to you on the grass.
Everyone waves at him, even you.
âWhat are you guys talking about?â
âThe vacations.â
âOh yeah, I can't wait. I need a break from all this,â he says as he lets out an exaggerated sigh and everyone in the group watches him with raised eyebrows.
âYou? A break?â Sara asks him.
âSure,â he shrugs, âI'm a student too.â
âYou've been drinking and going to parties every day,â Jason tells him amused, âWhat break are you talking about exactly?â
Everyone in the group laughs, even you, except him.
Aegon tries to justify himself, but even he knows he's a mess. When suddenly, his gaze fixes on you, raising an eyebrow and placing a smirk as if something has suddenly crossed his mind.
âHey, Y/N,â he nudges you lightly with his shoulder, âit was your birthday, right?â
You bite the inside of your cheek and nod with a small smile, trying to keep your composure.
âWhy didn't you invite me?â he asks, feigning indignation.
Cregan scoffs.
âI invited you, you idiot.â
âOh, right, right,â Aegon replies with a carefree laugh, âI'm sorry I didn't go. I had another little party. Aemond was there too, wasn't he, little brother?â
Aemond's silence is immediate and deafening. He says nothing, and that makes the atmosphere suddenly heavy, for you.
And something inside you twists. And you look down at your notebook, trying to control your emotions and everything you're thinking. But you can't.
A party. He was at a party, on your birthday.
âAnd how was that party?â asks Cregan.
âOh, fun, as always,â Aegon replies with a light tone. âThey were our childhood friends, the Baratheons, the Tyrells, the Martells, and the Lannisters.â
Your heart stops for an instant.
Lannister.
That last name weighs on your mind like a rock.
âYeah, it was really fun,â Aegon continues with a smile, âEven Aemond had a good time.â
The sound of his scandalous laughter fills the air, but is suddenly interrupted by Aemond's cold, cutting voice.
âShut the fuck up.â
The elder only shrugs with a smirk and raises both hands in surrender.
âOh, fucking spare me. You know how it is with him,â he says while at the same time starting to get up, âFirst he's fine and then suddenly he turns into fucking Maleficent, like at that party.â
He waves a lazy goodbye as the guys wave goodbye to him. And you get caught up in his words.
Even Aemond had a good time.
Now you understand. He forgot your birthday because he was with them, with Cerelle.
A pang of pain runs through your chest at the thought of what that implies, of what probably happened between the two of them.
And whatever it was, it didn't end well, because afterwards he went to the pub and he was so distant, so quiet, so cold and so upset that that's why he said those ugly words to you and treated you the way he treated you.
Otherwise, he would have stayed with her and you wouldn't have seen him on your birthday.
Still, the betrayal in your chest is palpable and growing bigger. He still showed up, as if nothing had happened, as if he hadn't forgotten you on your fucking birthday.
You press your lips together, trying to hold back the tears. You won't give him the pleasure of seeing you break. Not now, not here. Least of all when you feel his gaze on you, his gaze intent, fixed and more insistently on you now that you know.
With a new bitterness settling in your chest, you refuse to give him what he seeks. You keep your eyes anywhere but on him, resisting the storm of emotions that threatens to overflow inside you.
A few long minutes pass with the guys making any topic of conversation and that stare starts to bother you more and more, so you decide you've had enough and start putting away all your books and notebooks.
âI have to go now. I can't be late for my next class,â you let them know as you get up with all your stuff, âI'll see you guys later, okay?â
âOkay.â
âSure.â
âSee ya.â
You settle your backpack on your shoulder and with your phone in hand, you start walking away from them towards your corresponding building.
And as you walk away, a notification comes to your phone, followed by another. You stare at the screen and your breath catches for a moment, reading the texts, from him.
Are you fucking serious?
How long are you going to keep this shit up?
You scoff, shaking your head slightly. You don't even open the chat to let him know you've read it. And in fact, with a bitter look on your face and a new hurt feeling, you block him.
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The first week of vacation, you went to visit your Mom in Highgarden.
It wasn't a difficult decision because you knew a few days away from Kings Landing would do you good. And being with your Mom and younger brothers you knew it would be just enough to keep you busy and spend time with all of them.
Sara sent you pictures and videos of her time in the mountains of Winterfell, enjoying big cozy cabins and fancy hot tubs.
For a moment you regretted turning down her invitation, but as you laughed and played with your brothers, you were happy to be with them after so many months without seeing them.
You also sent him pictures of your home, the lake in the garden, flowers and the big woods, as well as selfies of you and your brothers. Through the group chat, Cregan and Jason also sent pictures of their vacations, both of them at the beach and tanning.
One thing you noticed, inevitably, was the absence of Aemond.
He usually doesn't send messages or pictures of what he's doing. But you assumed he would when he was in Dragonstone, maybe even a picture or two. But nothing. Complete silence. Just like you.
You blocked him from social media too. He has no way of knowing what you're doing and where, just as you have no way of knowing about him. And it was a kind of relief you hadn't experienced about him before. It was good to breathe and not be on the lookout to recognize red hair near him.
And the more it made you realize how much better off you are without getting involved with him.
In fact, you stayed home for more than two weeks. You couldn't help it after your brothers asked you to stay with them longer. Until you finally let Sara know you were going back to Kings Landing the next day.
It wasn't a hard goodbye, but your Mom and brothers were sad. You promised to come back, like you do every year on the next vacation. And finally you get on that plane.
It's not a long trip, thankfully. And when you land, surprisingly it's raining. The weather is cloudy, cold and perfect for welcoming you in to watch movies curled up in your bed.
So you order an Uber and soon you're on your way to your residence, letting Sara know of your movements at all times, just as she keeps bragging to you about her days in those comfy cabins.
As you arrive, the rain is still pouring down and you run towards the doors with your suitcase in one hand and the other protecting your head, even though you are already partially wet.
You enter the building, shaking off the water, and climb to the second floor. With your keys already in hand, you start thinking about what you're going to have for dinner and what movie will be the first of your marathon.
But then, you notice something.
Or rather, someone.
In front of your door, sitting on the floor with his head slightly tilted down, there is someone. Surprise forces you to slow your steps and your breathing quickens slightly as you recognize him, even before he looks up.
Aemond.
He turns his head towards you and his one visible eye meets yours. His expression is a strange mix between seriousness and something else⌠something softer, more vulnerable.
His lips are pressed together and the raindrops that surely reached him glisten on the ends of his hair. For a moment, you stand frozen in the hallway, not knowing what to say or do, with the sound of the rain out there filling the silence between the two of you.
You don't know exactly how long it takes, that you swallow hard and finally speak, taking a couple of cautious steps towards him.
âAemond?â
He doesn't say anything. He makes what appears to be a defeated gesture and rises from the ground, letting you see his profile straight ahead. He has the same look as before, with his hoddie's cap pulled up over his hair and he leans against the hallway wall behind him, looking at you and nothing else.
You shake your head, not understanding.
âWhat are you doing here?â
You ask him in surprise and confusion. And inevitably, seeing his state, you shouldn't but begin to worry about him. Has something bad happened to him?
âYou didn't go to Dragonstone?â you ask him later as you remember, feeling more confused than before.
What is he doing here instead of enjoying his vacation at his family's huge, luxurious beachside mansion?
And he finally speaks in his low, soft tone.
âNo.â
You frown, only with his answer creating more questions in your mind.
âAnd what are you doing here? How did you know I was coming back today?â
âI asked Sara.â
You part your lips, confused.
âWhy would she tell you that?â
âYou blocked me from everywhere, Y/N,â he tells you in a low, obvious tone, as if he had no choice.
Confusion and anger slowly begins to creep up on you. But you know you can't be upset with Sara, not with her. None of the boys know what you had with Aemond, they didn't even suspect it then and they certainly won't now.
Surely she saw it as a casual question, something insignificant, as if he had asked her about anyone else. So you can't be bothered. However, you begin to feel the awkwardness, as well as the slight sense of betrayal in your chest. And the bitterness.
âYou haven't told me what you're doing here.â
âI need to talk to you,â he says, taking a step toward you.
âAbout what?â you ask him instantly, confused and with a defensive tone, clearly annoyed.
Everything you have done regarding him, blocking him, not speaking to him anymore and walking away, is more than enough to make him understand that you no longer want to have anything to do with him.
And you know he understands that, so why is his need to keep doing this? Asking for you and looking for you?
You are sick of this situation.
And Aemond, noticing this, your look, which you've never given him before, before your birthday, is not something he's used to. Neither is your tone of voice and the distance you keep from him, when before you always wanted to be near him, almost all the time.
He feels more guilty and like an idiot than ever.
He lowers his gaze, trying to find a way not to keep fucking this up, to be able to talk to you, to let him into your life again. Then, just like he used to be with you when it was just the two of you, he drops his strong walls and for the first time, he comes across in the most honest and sincere way to you.
âI miss you.â
Your body immediately tenses as you hear those two words come out of his mouth. His voice, lower and laden with a sincerity you didn't expect, cuts your breath for a moment.
Your first impulse is to want to laugh, not out of amusement, but as a bitter, incredulous reaction.
And without saying anything, you watch him seriously, waiting for him to say something else, something that would make sense of his presence here, in the rain, in front of your door. But he doesn't.
He just watches you, his shoulders slightly down, and that vulnerability that he rarely lets show in him.
And seeing that you don't react, that you're still watching him even in that way, in that way he's not used to, when before it was a tender and loving look, now there's none of that⌠he hates it.
So he hurries to speak again, to explain himself, to make you understand.
âI know I fucked up. I didn't mean to tell you all that on your birthday. You didn't deserve it and I'm sorry. I was an idiot,â he says, âBut I miss you and that's why I'm here.â
You shake your head slightly, watching him earnestly and attentively, while at the same time folding your arms, in an attempt to protect yourself from the wave of emotions that threatens to attack you.
He looks at you pleadingly and you look at him serious, disinterested, with the distance marked and the bitterness still inside you.
âThat's it?â
His face contracts slightly in frustration.
âY/Nâ
âIf that's all, you can go,â you interrupt him, quickly pushing past him with your suitcase in hand and trying to get into your dorm room as fast as you can to leave him behind.
But you knew you wouldn't make it.
His hand immediately takes you gently but firmly by your arm, stopping you and turning you back to him so he can see your face and speak to you.
âNo, that's not all,â he tells you instantly, âI-I⌠I want things to go back to the way they used to be.â
âAnd how were things between the two of you before exactly?â you inquire, taking a decisive step toward him, âYou want to go back to the whole âno strings attachedâ thing? To seeing each other in secret and me still just being your convenient fuck and nothing else? That's what you want?â
Your tone is a poison dart, and you see him recoil, as if your every word burns him. His jaw tenses, but he doesn't say anything right away.
âSay it, âyou challenge him, taking a step closer, your eyes boring into his, âTell me it wasn't just that. Tell me it wasn't just⌠that I wasn't justâ
Your voice cracks, and you hate that it does. Because even though you're upset, even though you want to stay strong, it's too much. He still affects you even more intensely than he did before.
He looks at you, his lips parted, as the rain continues to fall outside.
âThat's what I thought,â you whisper at last, releasing yourself from his grip.
You hold the keys more firmly in your hand, avoiding shaking, to insert it into the lock of your door. But he, not wanting it to end like this, stops you.
âYou never said anything. You seemed fine with all of it. Now why the sudden change?â
You close your eyes tightly, no longer able to hold back the tears in your eyes. The bitterness, the sadness, the pain, the betrayal, everything stirs inside you. It hurts you and there seems to be no end to it, because again you turn to face him.
And seeing the tears threatening to run down your cheeks, something in his gaze softens, not expecting to see you like this.
âAre you fucking serious?â you say to him almost in a whisper in a shaky, bitter voice, âAfter what you did, what you said, how do you expect me to be okay to keep being with you?â
He lets out a long breath.
âY/N⌠you weren't just that. You never were. And I⌠I was upset that day. And I shouldn't have taken it out on you, I know that. But I promise you weren't just that to me.â
You shake your head, not believing his words for a second. Not anymore.
âThe thing here is, your words don't mean anything to me anymore.â
He takes a step toward you.
âI didn't mean to⌠I didn't think thatâ
âThat's the problem, Aemond, you never think of anyone but yourself,â you interrupt him in a harsh, annoyed voice, âEverything is always about what you want, what's convenient for you.â
He shakes his head.
âThat's not trueâ
âOf course it is,â you take a shaky breath and your words coming out softer, but no less sharp, â And even now, after all, you don't understand how much you meant to me. Because I didn't matter to you, ever.â
No matter how many times he tells you that it was not so, you will not believe him, because he did not necessarily prove to you before something that can prove his words. There are no facts, there is nothing.
And that same bitterness, makes you finally be brave, speak up, get it off your chest. So you don't let him talk so you can get it over with once and for all.
âYou know what happened?â you ask, âI got feelings. That's what happened.â
And there it is. You've said it.
Those words you never said long ago so as not to scare him away from you, how you knew it would happen, without putting you and what you felt first. But still, without having said it before, you ended up with a broken heart.
The weight of your words falls between the two of you like an invisible wall, so palpable you can almost touch it. Aemond seems to freeze, his eyes anchored on yours.
âThat's why things can't go back to the way they were, because, of course, that's not what you want. What you want is an idiot who is at your beck and call whenever and however you want her to be.â
Your words hit him unexpectedly.
And the change in his expression is immediate. All the vulnerability he had shown disappears from his face.
And once again you are in front of the Aemond everyone knows; the cold, distant, serious and inexpressive Aemond. His gaze, once pleading and remorseful, becomes hard and distant.
His jaw visibly tenses and you notice how his shoulders square, adopting that defensive posture you know so well.
âDon't say that,â his voice comes out low, strained. âIt wasn't like that.â
âIt wasn't?â you inquire, pursing your lips, âYou said I was just a convenient fuck. I'm sure you can find someone else, then.â
Every word comes like poison from your lips, and though it pains you to say them, you know they're true. You see it in the way his face contorts slightly, as if your words have hit him where it hurts the most.
But he maintains that typical attitude of his, that mask of indifference he has perfected over the years.
You wait for him to contradict you, to deny it, to try to justify it. But nothing. He says nothing. He just stands there, staring at you seriously, jaw clenched and looking like he's having an internal fight, struggling against his thoughts, not knowing what to do or what to say.
And you again press your lips together, having enough of this.
âGet out.â
And he finally reacts, lowering his gaze and letting out a deep sigh, pursing his lips and looking at you again with a serious look.
âI can't give you what you want, Y/N.â
âBut you do want me to give you what you want,â you say firmly and curtly, âBecause Cerelle didn't, right?â
The words are out of your mouth before you can think about what you're going to say. But there it is, you've said it too.
His lips part, his whole body tenses, watching you in surprise and mild confusion, definitely not expecting that from you. And there, you leave him speechless, trying to understand how it is that you know about her.
And although for a second you look unsure about what you've said and regretful, you also decide that you're not going to keep quiet about it any longer. And you continue, with bitterness in your eyes and in your tone of voice.
âYou forgot my birthday, because of her,â you say, each word like a dagger, âYou were late because you were with her.â
âHow do you know about her?â he asks you instantly, his voice like ice.
You swallow hard softly, holding his gaze despite the pain it causes you.
Of course he would ask you that.
âI noticed something between you, when she went to the same parties as us,â you reply, âThe way you looked at her, how your mood changed when she appeared and when you both disappeared,â you say with those moments replaying in your mind, still so present, âAnd then Aegon, drunk as usual, told me a few things.â
âWhat did he tell you?â he again asks you instantly, serious and thoughtful.
The rigidity in his body, the tension, is more evident now, as is the vulnerability and sadness in you as you talk about her. And you avert your gaze, with every word coming out of your mouth aching, but needing to say it all.
âThat the two of you had a thing. That you're in love with her, but she's not in love with you.â
The muscle in his jaw tenses so tight you fear he'll break his teeth, his breathing grows heavier, and for a moment, you see a flash of raw pain in his eyes before the mask of coldness falls back into place.
âThe worst part is that I've known that for a while now,â you continue, your voice cracking slightly despite your best efforts, âI kept hoping I meant more to you than just your way of filling that void.â
For a moment, your mask of coldness cracks. But only for a moment. And you see a glimmer, of something deeper in her gaze. Guilt? Remorse?
But just as it appears, it vanishes. You notice how his hands open and close at his sides, a nervous gesture he rarely displays. His gaze again seems to search for something on the floor, before meeting your gaze again.
And when he finally speaks, his voice comes out lower, more controlled, as if each word is carefully measured.
âThat was never my intention.â
It's almost as if the words hurt as they come out, as if a part of him wants to say more but doesn't know how. And you scoff, incredulous.
âSure, you didn't mean to treat me as your second option and break my heart with every cold, disinterested attitude every time she came back to break yours?â
The silence that follows is heavy, laden with all the unsaid things between you.
âI can't give you what you want,â he repeats resignedly, watching you seriously.
âThen leave.â
âY/Nâ
âNo,â you interrupt him instantly, stepping back instinctively, âI'm done here. I'm done with you. So leave. Don't come looking for me, ever again, do you understand? I don't want anything to do with you anymore.â
You are clear in your words. You're not playing games. You're not hesitating for a second. And you're being terribly honest.
Something snaps inside you, but there's also something starting to break free. There's no turning back now and you both know it, because this time, finally, you chose to put yourself first.
So you walk into your dorm room, while he stands in the middle of the hallway, not saying or doing anything else. And then you close the door.
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AEMOND POV
There is something off⌠in the way you are no longer around.
It shows in the small details, the way you slowly disappeared from his life. In the way a message with your name no longer appears on his phone, nor a call.
In the way he was unconsciously so used to visiting you in your dorm or your going to his apartment. The way you used to fall asleep next to him in his big bed. The way you would make breakfast for the two of you before you went to class.
The way you both exchanged subtle glances when you were in a group with the guys or at parties. The way in secret encounters, stolen kisses in the shadows and passionate moments in his bedroom.
But there was also the way you always waited for him.
That's a thought that hits him with the force of a delayed revelation, something his own selfishness kept him from seeing before.
When he would ignore your texts or calls, when he wouldn't meet you, when he would cancel plans at the last minute, when he would disappear for days and barely be around, for her⌠for Cerelle.
Even on his bad days, after every fight with her, he would come back and there you were, without protest or asking for explanations. And then it was back to the usual routine; all secret. And casual.
He runs a hand through his hair, letting out a long breath. He looks at the clock on his nightstand; midnight. He can't sleep. His mind keeps him awake, because all he can think about, is you.
Since the day of your birthday, specifically, you've tormented his mind. Ever since he knew he fucked up, ever since you stopped answering his texts, calls, to ignoring him even when he was in front of you and leaving him behind, you haven't stopped rolling around in his mind.
He was supposed to be right now in Dragonstone, enjoying his vacation, like everyone else before the new semester crushes him with new difficulties, responsibilities and pressures.
But he decided not to go, because he couldn't. Because you were supposed to go with him.
He doesn't even want to admit how much that idea excited him. The two of you had made the plan, you were supposed to go with him. But when you canceled, without even telling him directly, it disappointed him in a way he didn't expect.
But he doesn't blame you. He can't. Not after what he did.
He's too proud though, too stubborn to accept it ending like this. He refuses to let you go, even when you've made it perfectly clear that you want nothing more to do with him. He can't help but seek you out, pursue you, unaware of the damage he continues to cause.
That's why he went looking for you. But he had already lost you, for a while now.
And he misses you. By the Gods, how he misses you.
He took you for granted, thinking you would always be there for him, even with his bad moods and his habit of taking it out on others, like he did on your birthday.
A growl of frustration escapes his throat as he brings a hand to his forehead, closing his eyes tightly.
The memory of that day haunts him like a curse. Not only did he ruin everything between you two, but he did it on your birthday. Your damn birthday that he forgot.
Guilt and regret flood him inside as he lies in his bed. And every memory, every mental image is a reminder of what he has lost because of his own stupidity.
How could he have been so blind? So selfish?
The silence of the night is deafening, interrupted only by the soft ticking of the clock and his own breathing. His eyes burn with exhaustion, but sleep refuses to take him.
Not when your voice echoes in his mind, repeating those words, âI kept waiting to mean more to you than just your way of filling that void.â
Suddenly, the silence is broken by the ringing of his phone. His heart violently flips in his chest, and for a moment, he thinks it might be you. His hands move with almost desperate speed to reach for his phone.
But hope dies quickly when he sees the name on the screen; Cerelle.
He stands completely still, watching the screen light up again and again with her call. And for the first time, something changes inside him. Instead of the usual anxious fluttering in his stomach when he sees her name, instead of that compulsive need to answer immediately, he feels⌠nothing.
Or maybe not nothing. He feels tiredness. A deep, overwhelming tiredness.
He knows exactly why she's calling. He can picture it perfectly, another fight with Aegon, tears in her voice, needing someone to listen to her, to comfort her. Needing him, not because she really wants him, but because it's convenient.
Because she knows he is always there, waiting like an idiot, ready to pick up the pieces his brother leaves behind.
âIt wasn't your intention to treat me like your second choice? To break my heart with every cold, disinterested attitude every time she came back to break yours?â
The irony is not lost on him, he did to you exactly what Cerelle does to him. He used you to fill a void, to not feel so alone, so unloved.
The phone stops ringing, only to start again almost immediately. This time, however, he feels no hesitation. With a decisive move, he turns it off completely, cutting off the call and any chance of further messages.
He drops back onto the bed, his mind inevitably drifting back to you. It's as if he can't help himself, as if all his thoughts have a direct path to your memory.
He sees your face with a clarity that hurts him, the way your eyes sparkled when you laughed, how your nose crinkled slightly when something bothered you, the softness of your cheeks when you blushed, the way your hair fell over your face when you concentrated on something.
Your lips⌠the way they curved into a smile, how they felt against his, the taste of your kisses. Every detail of you is burned into his memory.
The silence of the night seems to taunt him, reminding him of all the times he could have done things differently, all the opportunities he had to value you as you deserved and wasted thinking of someone else.
He lost you because of his own stupidity, because of his inability to see what was in front of him until it was no longer there. For chasing an illusion with Cerelle while he had something real with you.
And now, it's too late.
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thank you for reading!
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond fanfiction#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen x you#hotd aemond#modern hotd#au modern#modern aemond#aemond one eye#aemond one shot#aemond targaryen angst#aemond x fem!reader
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things i've learned about fandom âď¸
i got into fandom pretty recently. i mean i'm pushing 30, so i didn't really "grow up" in fandom and thus, had a lot to learn about being nice online lol. i've definitely been in fandoms b4, but never quite as immersed as i am now. like, last year was the first time i've been to a con! it was really fun. i feel like i've learned a lot this year and i think most folks navigate without malicious intentions, but there are some faux pas that i've observed (that i have done myself unfortunatelyđ ) and idk who may be interested in hearing this, but just some of my observations; (anthropologist hat on) dead dove do not eat: in the realm of fiction and freedom from censorship (which is cool as hell imo), there are gonna be some stories that may seem quite taboo or distasteful to one's sensibilities. if you're not a fan, i recommend blocking/muting. usually folks are quite good about tagging ships or dynamics, in consideration of those who may want to find or avoid that content.
the etiquette seems to vary by region of the world (makes sense) if commenting on a post for someone who speaks a different language than you, it may be better to avoid idioms/expressions as they may translate literally and seem harsh to another culture. (e.g. "omg they are sickening" a compliment in america, an insult maybe everywhere else LOL) obviously u can do whatever u want, but being a hater (or anti?) is probably gonna lose you some charm points. so if coming across a certain way is important to you, then this is probably just something to consider. for example, there are things i observe in fandom that i don't really like, but i avoid dogging on it publicly because idk that's kinda mean spirited, right? but also because i have this unexpectedly big following and i'm not trying to start a dogpile or sic people after others. the internet can be scary đł when i make complaints, i try to keep it vague so that individuals are not attacked cuz that would suck pls don't be a fandom cop: this is the internet, pls dont be a self-appointed authority figure. it's natural that folks will have their critiques. why not write about it in your own space instead of trying to control others' actions? (especially with an air of entitlement and self imposed moral authority, like cmon) obvs folks are gonna do whatever they want on the internet, i just think this behavior is lame as hell ight that's all i got LOL. this is for any fandom newbies like i was (this is not meant to be rules or anything because that would be icky. but just wanted to share my experience with fandom since i've learned a lot from discussions with others more versed in fandom life)
#this is probably super obvious to lots of people#but not all of this was obvious to me and others i've interacted with this past year so i just wanted to put it out there#a lot of these are irl lessons i've learned HOWEVER#i've never interacted with this many people about a singular subject matter on a regular basis before sooo#i feel like it's a different environment haha#i feel like it's a diary entry#this whole blog is deadass my diary#yknow how many irl people know about this??#2 of my friends#and it's literally because i met them through this fandom at a con LOL
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Guys not to fanboy AGAIN over Captive Prince but the conversation about languages in CaPri is SO GOOD.
The language you speak holds so much significance in political discussions. Pacat added all these details when Akielos and Vere sign their agreement about having the verbiage translated into both languages, exactly side-by-side, so it's clear that neither side is being advantaged. THAT IS SO REAL. That's a real thing countries do when they sign political agreements, because language is a tool of soft power and capitulating to another country's language is a sign that you're letting them exert influence over you (Britain loved to do it when they were colonizing the entire world, Russia did it during the Soviet Union, and China does it now. All of the Chinese language study they sponsor in other countries is not out of the goodness of their heart.)
And the entire section in Prince's Gambit about Laurent keeping Damen up night after night to talk troop movements in Akielon, saying that it's for 'security purposes' because he's afraid there are spies in his forces that might overhear - only for Laurent in King's Rising to speak fluent Akielon to Makedon and Nikandros when he's planning their invasion of Akielos with them. It's both a concession and a show of skill to do such a thing - speaking your ally's language to them is a real sign of camaraderie and trust, it's 'giving in' to their influence a little bit, but also Laurent is showing off his super niche vocabulary to make himself seem ultra-competent and impressive. He's in a position where his allies actively don't trust or want to work with him, and he's using his language to change their minds.
I love that Pacat didn't just make Laurent magically, suddenly good at Akielon, that he took the time to write in the weeks of practice it took for Laurent to get there, because authors do not realize how hard foreign language is. Particularly the nuance of being able to speak a language relatively fluently but still lacking the vocabulary for a specific topic. And it reinforces Laurent's character so well - showing how far he's thinking ahead, but also how devious he is that he doesn't trust Damen enough to tell him the real reason for the practice, BUT ALSO it's my personal opinion that Laurent has been Big Mad about his language skills since Damen got that "I speak your language better than you speak mine, sweetheart" off in the beginning of the first book. Laurent heard that and went, 'well fuck you, I'm going to learn Akielon so hard it'll knock your socks off', and then he did. 10/10 writing.
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hi Idk if youâre still taking requests but if you are, could you write a Franco x pregnant reader smut? I know he doesnât have kids and is still quite young but just him with a pregnant woman (early pregnancy), wanting to be careful with her but struggling to hold back⌠Anyway thanks in advance if you write it otherwise no worries!
home sweet home
tags: smut & fluff, gentle sex, pregnancy/pregnant!reader, cowgirl position, praise & sweet talk, established relationship
a/n: thank you for the lovely request anon! i hope you love it, and if you have anymore requests please send them to me! enjoy!!
miracles were possible, and surprises were at every corner. and franco colapinto was going to be a father by the middle of the year. reserve driver for 2025 with a hopeful future seat, and he was having a child with you. a lot of things were thrown at him before his season season even started.
but he was making due with the time he had. curled up in bed with you, the days were ticking by before the season started. he didn't want to leave with alpine, he wanted to stay at home with you. despite the immense support from your family and his, he was that child's father so he should be around more often.
but that was the price of formula one. fame and glory, a seat on the grid at the expense of missing crucial time with the people he loved. so every second with you, he wanted to stretch out into minutes.
you were only four months along, not even halfway. there was a slope to your middle and franco's hand was gravitated towards it like a magnet. even with you both in bed, a random marvel movie playing on the television, his hand was on your stomach.
"quiet today." he remarked, his voice close to your ear as you remained curled up into one another. his lips grazed the shell of your ear as you shifted a little closer to him.
"i think he's bored by the movie too." you remarked, your hand moved to cover his. the tenderness between you two, he rubbed in small circles and remained pressed up against you. your cheek rested on his shoulder while he held you.
"not one of the best ones." his hand reached to the underside of your pregnant belly and down into the waistband of your sleeping shorts. the soft fabric felt good against the back of his hand as he touched your pussy over your underwear.
you chuckled against his shoulder and splayed your hand out on his chest. you knew that franco had a small kink for your pregnant form. he worshiped you in every language he could speak, made comments about how beautiful you looked and when you were apart he asked for photos of you - clothed photos of you. he just wanted to see your pregnancy glow. he called you his little sun from how bright you looked while carrying his child.
he rubbed his fingers up against your slit and you felt a shudder of want through your core. you couldn't help but be attracted to him as well. how tender he was with you, how sweet he was. it made you almost tear up, but also spiked arousal in you.
"franco."
"tell me no."
"i'll do on better." you pressed up against him further. then pulled his hand out from your short then kissed his knuckles, "how about yes." then reached for his t-shirt and started to pull it off of him.
he chuckled and his hands went to your waistband once more. but instead to pull them off of you. he pressed his forehead against his, only moving away so you could get the shirt over his head. you slowly undressed one another, hands trailed across each other's bodies. it felt right, it felt warm as you were both comfortable in bed together.
kisses were shared along with sweet little moans. the two of you moved together like you had memorized each other's bodies. love flowed between you two. soft 'i love you's and 'you look amazing' as clothes were kicked off the bed. the covers pushed down so give you room to straddle his waist.
you were both a bit young, but the future seemed to bright. you, him and your child together. the little peanut in your belly, the product of the two of you. two pieces of a whole put together to make a child. it was honestly amazing, and while you weren't actively trying. it was a welcomed surprise.
franco helped you get seated on his cock. he placed his hands on your slight swell as you moved slowly. he laid there under you, letting you control the pace. he had to hold back, he could remember all the nights of wild (kinky) sex. but now, it was nothing but tenderness, he had to be. he couldn't risk hurting you.
it was his job to protect you. you were his heart and soul, his family. his hands roamed your belly as you leaned forward to anchor yourself with your hands in the covers. you moved your body slowly and franco was close enough to kiss.
he couldn't help himself, you looked beautiful. everything about you looked perfect, even on your worse days. when you felt sick or tired, when you were grumpy. it didn't matter because franco made a promise the night after your first date to never turn his back on you. when you succeeded, you both did. when he suffered a loss, you were still together. the highs and lows of life only brought you two closed together.
"my love. my sweet, sweet love. look at you, glowing." he chuckled lowly, "more beautiful than ever." his hands splayed across your middle as you slowly took him. the pace made his entire body tingle, "you complete me, you know that, right? my love for you runs deep. from the moment i met you."
you smiled a little it and pushed hair out of his face. he was due for a trim soon, "you're pretty amazing yourself. four months ago after your second chance on the track, bringing those points home. how you made me feel that night."
"barely able to walk out of the hotel room the next morning. and that mark you left on me, my love. caused quite the scandal back home."
you held onto the covers tightly and let out a small moan before you replied, "as if we are not next to married? as if you didn't promise my family that we'd get married after our baby is born. that you'd be a proper family man." your pace marginally increased and franco felt the fire in his core at the feeling of you.
the feeling of the heated intimacy between you two. it was like a tide of warmth though your bodies. almost pressed together, fitted together nicely.
"and i mean it." he replied softly, "mrs. colapinto." he broke into a smile. your traced fingers across the scars on his shoulder. he leaned into your touch. a soft moan left those soft lips as the pleasure coursed through him. eyes half-lidded as his hands roamed your body.
"you flatter me."
"only for you." he said as if he wasn't a total flirt to the press. but he laid it on extra thick around you. the gentle words and soft caresses. the feeling of love through him, it struck him like an arrow.
there was a racing in your heart as you continued to move against him. you moved and let yourself enjoy the feeling, the intimacy between you two. your eyes closed a little as you pressed further into him and let your movements speak for yourself.
"i love you."
"and i love you." you replied softly. the sounds of your love-making filled the bedroom. late afternoon light streamed through the windows, basking you in a glow that only made franco more aroused.
he got you pregnant, he marked you in a way that bound you two together for a long, long time. near forever. but he would never take advantage of that bond, that link between you two. you were his future wife, the love of his life. you were the streaming sunlight through grey clouds, the chirping of birds to signal the coming of spring. you were everything and he loved you.
the pleasure blossomed in your core as you continued your movements. you felt the sweat on your bare back, his large hands on your middle only added to close feeling between you two. you were so close, close in ways you could never be with another.
love, that was all it was. a yearning, deep love. so it wasn't hard that with the pace you moved with and the pleasure that raced through your blood, that you soon climaxed. your eyes squeezed shut as the feeling hit you deeply. your cunt clenched around his cock and franco deeply exhaled, a small moan left his lips.
you rode him through your orgasm and admired the look of him while his pleasure started to reach its peak as well. you felt his hands on your hips as you moved against him. your pace was still gentle, and every curve gave a big jump with your movements. it looked beautiful and aroused franco to the point that the pleasure clouded his mind.
a few more rocks of your hips and he was finishing inside of you. he held onto you closely. your belly pressed against his stomach. you felt so close together, slotted together perfectly. his words were ramblings as the pleasure coursed through him. orgasm burned his blood and it felt amazing. you leaned in once more to kiss him deeply as you slowed your pace to a stop. then you broke the kiss and cupped his face.
the third act of the bland movie paired with the sounds of action, but you were both wrapped up in one another. his arms were wrapped around your waist and he maneuvered you back onto the bed and his face against the top of your belly.
his cheek pressed up against the swell, he felt the dreaminess of post-orgasmic bliss as he relaxed against you. you reached to play with his hair. you both laid together as you caught your breath.
you remarked jokingly, "i'm picking the next movie." and franco chuckled lightly, "i mean it, colapinto! that movie was bad."
he laughed a little louder, joy in his voice as he said, "of course, of course. anything for you, mrs. colapinto. the love of my life." <3
#bunny writes#reader insert#formula 1#formula one imagine#formula one smut#formula one fanfiction#f1 smut#f1 x reader#formula one#franco colapinto smut#franco colapinto x you#franco colapinto x reader#franco colapinto#fc43 smut#fc43#fc43 x reader#fc43 imagine#fc43 x you#fc43 fic
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So this was my ask from a long time ago, and I had thoughts of mgit (modern girl in thedas) story for this, but it never came to fruition. What I did do, though, was write a drabble from the Inquistor's POV. I thought it was long gone, but I stumbled upon it through my Google docs. After reading it, I thought I would post it here.
For context, the woman's name is Nora, and she is married and has a kid. There was an accident of some sort where the husband and child didn't survive, but she did and wound up in Thedas with the mark on her hand. She didn't want anything to do with the Inquisition as her spouse and child were her whole world and was grieving. She didn't care if she lived or died, but her moral compass of wanting to help those in need prevented her from outright killing herself.
Over time, the grief becomes...less in a way. After the fall of Haven and becoming the Inquisitor, her depression ramps up again but also has conflicting feelings about Cullen.
Then she becomes kidnapped red templars and...I forgot what they called the evil mages that worked for Corypheus were called. The ones that went crazy or were they called blood mages? Anyway, their plan was to 'kill' the Inquisitor and then use necromancy on her dead body to have control of the mark. Obviously, that doesn't happen cuz the Inquisition comes to the rescue juuuust in time.
So here it is. Below this is a TW of depression, blood, thoughts of suicide, and mentions of rape
Whack.
She yelped in pain as he punched the side of her face again. Another swollen bruise to add the collection on her body and face. She tried to wrench her wrists free of her binds, but the rope held tight was starting to cut into her skin. âWhy am I fighting this? Donât I want to die?â She thought to herself as her body struggled against her captors.Â
She wasnât sure, but her thoughts were stilled when a rough hand grabbed her by the throat. The red templar forced her to look up at him as he tightened his grip. Staring into the glowing crimson eyes, he snarled. âShould I let them rape you, mage? If you keep fighting, I wonât let you have any dignity left.âÂ
Nora froze upon hearing those words. To be raped and let whatever was to be become of her? His grip was tightening as she went limp with fear. If she were to die anyway, she wanted to at least have the choice to stay intact. The man stilled his tightening grip and slowly loosened his hold to see if she would struggle again. She didnât move. Taking as a sign of surrender, he ordered the other men to bind her legs quickly.Â
Everything moved quickly in a blur for her after that as she was carried to the open wooden box and placed inside. Her eyes began to sting with tears while her captors placed the lid on top and hammered it down with nails. She couldnât see anything, but she could hear their voices.Â
Soon she heard what sounded like chanting. It sounded low and in another language. What was going on out there? Did it matter? She watched interior of the box glow at the seams with a dark purple energy. It glowed brighter and brighter what felt like the longest time before it faded away, plunging her back into darkness.Â
The next thing she knew was that box was being lifted and then lowered back down. She rocked back and forth with the casket, but it soon lurched with a soft thump. Nora fidgeted around with her hands tied in front of her until she heard the sound dirt being poured on top of the box she was in. Her eyes grew wide, and she sobbed. âThis is it. This is how I die.â She thought as she tried to calm herself and accept her fate as she was being buried alive.Â
âIt shouldnât be painful. Iâll fall unconscious as I lose oxygen. Iâll get to see my boys again soon. Just like I always wanted. I would have already offed myself if I didnât have this fucking curse on my hand. They wanted their world saved though. My stupid guilty, noble do-the-right-thing just HAD to win outâŚâÂ
She thought like this as the sound of the dirt grew fainter. She assumed it was because her grave was almost filled up. She wondered how much time she actually had. It could be a few minutes to possibly a few hours or so she was told by Google. Looks like she was going to test that theory.Â
Nora let her mind sift through all her memories. From her childhood to her adolescent days to adulthood. Then it went to more recent memories of losing her husband and child in a flash of green and then winding up in Thedas. Going through the story of the game or most of it anyway. She thought about the companions she met and actually becoming friends with them. She even thought about him. She wasnât sure how she felt about him still but he definitely made her heart race.Â
She wasnât sure how much time has passed but the sound of the dirt stopped and she heard muffled shouts and what sounded like metal clashing. She strained her ears as best as she could. She couldnât tell how deep she was buried but it didnât sound like she was buried too deep or she wouldnât have likely heard anything.Â
She was starting to feel tired. When she heard a muffled angry voice that sounded like...
âCassandra?â
They came all this way for me?
--------------
Aaaaannnnd end. That's it. Then my ask picks up from there.
You don't have to do this one. DAi: LI's only. After locating the Inky's they find that their leader is nowhere in sight. After some fruitless interrogating, they hear a faint THUMP THUMP THUMP and muffled screaming. They search for the source and find a half filled grave and the sound of their leader under the dirt. Their reaction: Discovering their Inky was buried alive.
Cassandra: Her heart drops, and the panic doesnât even have time to settle before she is loudly barking orders and trying to steady her breathing. The second she gets the Inquisitor out of his shallow grave; she grabs him in a big hug and refuses to let go. The seeker is far from a merciful person, any may Andraste protect whoever dared do this to the person she loves. For a second she looks up at the man she loves, dirty and bruised with a mixture of panic and fear in his eyes. She doesnât even want to think about what wouldâve happened if they hadnât gotten there sooner.Â
Solas: Bring along the fury of a wolf and you will end up being ripped apart by the pack, this is very much apparent with Solas. The apostate is quick on his feet, helping his vhenan out of the grave and staring at the people responsible whom they just questioned; he has murder in his gaze. The only thing stopping him from acting then and there is the soft touch from his lover, her shaking body quickly moving closer to him for comfort. He would never forgive the people who did this and the ones who survived his visit later that night were the unlucky ones.
Dorian: At first he is rather unsettling, extremely calm and soft-spoken, only to lash out when someone makes a rather poor comment as the Inquisitor is helped out of his grave. Dorian feels utterly helpless and furious when he sees his Amatus like that, the man has bruises around his wrists showing he was tied; a busted lip and a tired gaze. he knows that if they had been slower the man he loved wouldâve been underneath them all along but lacking the consciousness to ever speak up about where he was. One wrong clue or details lost couldâve led to being one minute too late. And that terrifies him.
Sera: May whatever god these people look up to be a just and forgiving one; because Sera sure as hell isnât. As soon as Inky is out of that grave, an arrow is lodged into the leg of the nearest guilty person; and she has to be held back from jumping the man. She has no mercy for these people, and absolutely no pity for them as their screams reach her ears. Sera is scarily silent as she calms down, quickly finding her girlfriend and latching onto her- a shaky breath escaping her as she promises that she wonât ever let this happen again.
Blackwall: Honestly; it would surprise noone if Thom admitted to having done this himself, seeing as how calm he was when he was met with the issue itself; quick and steady hands knowing what to do right away. He doesnât speak much when the Inquisitor stumbles out of the grave, clinging onto him and gasping for air and shaking. The tears in her eyes is enough to send his very being into a angry rampage; but he simply stays silent. Comforting his lover as he leads her away from the site, the others can deal with the vermin.
Iron Bull: May whoever did this rest in peace, because honestly they messed up the second they dared to mess with anyone who had contacts within the chargers. Bull is extremely gentle and careful with his lover; the poor thing shaking and it breaks his heart the second he sees the bruises on their face. Being buried alive is not fun, he would know. He is more aware than anyone else how lucky they were; because you loose oxygen fast in a casket. He lets out a shaky breath before kissing their face, muttering an apology for taking so long.
Josephine: When she had heard the word of what happened, she couldnât help but close herself inside the office and just cry. Leliana had made sure she got time to let out all the worry and stress as she awaited for her lover to return. When they did? They were met by Josephine, puffy eyes and a lip that she had clearly chewed on more than enough to draw blood. And she only started crying again when she saw their bruised face, just about starting to heal from traveling back. She hated that she had to let them go on these trips; but she knew stopping them would only make things worse. With a tired sigh she grabs their hand, they needed a few hours. Just to be.
Cullen: He was the one leading the rescue operation, and he thought he had the ability to act cool. But when the Inquisitor is helped up from the casket and is finally able to see in the much brighter area; she sees him acting extremely out of character. The man on the ground is bleeding heavily from his face as Cassandra pulls the commander away from him. Cullen had been scared, he had felt so lonely when he found out that his rage blinded him and for a split second he wanted nothing else but to kill the person responsible. He feels his anger melt when the hand of his loved one is carefully placed on his cheek, as she whispers for him to calm down. She is bruised, tired and was probably on her last breaths. He would never forgive himself for allowing this to happen to begin with, but may the maker have mercy on the people responsible. They would face the wrath of Cullen Rutherford.
#dragon age inquisition#dragon age#mgit#modern girl in thedas#fanfiction drabble#dragon age fanfiction#trigger warnings#depression#dark stuff#unaliving thoughts
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Leona pinning headcanons with a reader who follows him round pretty please!1!1>-<
Leona with a reader who follows him around
Pairing Leona Kingscholar x GN!reader
Word count: 758
Cw- Leona is a sad sad man/endearing, fluff, reader is not specified to be yuu, not proofread.
A/n: I got a lil carried away while writing so this is more of a ramble than headcanons đŚ also for some reason my asks got wiped so for everyone who had an req earlier I'm sorry đ!! They are still open !
Leona didn't know how to feel about you at first, truly you were a mystery to him. He couldn't figure out what your motives were. Seriously no one else came up to them. They'd usually be too scared to even come up to him. And when they do they always want something from him.
It's always been that way so Leona honestly didn't care anymore he'd either just walk away or give them a glare that sent them running with their tails tucked between their legs.
But you? Sevens he didn't even know what to do with you. He couldn't figure out a single thing you could have possibly wanted from him. You're always following him around.
 At first he was annoyed. Everywhere he went your bubbly presence followed. You always asked him questions and he couldn't stand it. Seriously, he didn't know what to do with you.
He'd tell Ruggie to stay on the lookout for you but it never worked. He honestly believed he let it happen on purpose. At one point he tried to pay you to leave him alone.
You shocked him by shaking your head and telling him you just like being around him. No, you had to want something from him? He just grumbled and turned over and proceeded to try and go back to sleep.
He tried to ignore the way his heart beat increased slightly. He wasn't used to beingâŚwanted.
Leona used to roll his eyes whenever you'd talk about him to others like you were friends. Now he just looks away as his tail flickered slightly in embarrassment. Ruggie would tease him about how you practically followed him around like some lost puppy, and tease him on how he stopped trying to push you away.Â
âDon't tell me you've gone soft!â
He hasn'tâŚhe just got used to your presence. It's more odd if you stopped coming around. Totally not because he's become attached to you. Not because he's scared if he even pretends to push you away you'll actually leave.
Leona can't help but linger around you as well, the few times you're not following him around he's following you around. He doesn't make it obviousâŚunless there's someone else getting too much of your attention.
He'll admit it he does get jealous. He knows what being jealous feels like, but he's always been jealous of what people have and yeah sure he's been jealous of lack of attention as a child but this. This is different.
Leona would loom over you intimidating whoever was taking your attention from him, or head straight up you just to drag you away from them.Â
He is in pure denial that he likes youâŚhe's just fascinated by you and your nature. He likes whenever you chirpily talk to him while trying hard to keep up with his stride.
He won't admit to anyone that he feels disappointed whenever he wakes up from a nap and you haven't somehow found him.Â
Leona isn't in love be justâŚwants to kiss that still smile off your face whenever you're ranting. He's not in love, he just wants all your attention. He's not in love, he just wants to drag you down with him while he sleeps. He is not in love, he just wants to call you his. Leona.is.not.in love.
(At least that's what he tells himself)
Leona eventually accepts the reality of his feelings when you two were sitting down at lunch and you told him about how someone had asked you out. He nearly choked on his food. He decided right then and there that he'd tell you how he feels.
 However he didn't know why but telling you flat out wasâŚhard? He'd just grumbled and continued eating. Ruggie chuckled to himself watching the way Leona's tail flickered in aggravation.
From then he tries so hard to drop hints that he doesn't just tolerate you. You're not naive but sevens it was like you couldn't drop a single hint he gave you.
Leona was so pathetic he just wanted you. Why couldn't you see that? Weren't the gifts not a sign? The fact that he once offered you to nap with him. Yeah he doesn't know what he's doing and even thinks about going to Ruggie but immediately back tracks.
The next time he sees you he just straight up grabs you by the shoulders.
âHerbivore, I like you.â
âI mean I sure hope you do, we're friends right?â
...
You're killing him. He hangs his head in defeatâŚmaybe he should go to Ruggie.
Please help him.
MASTERLIST
#crunchystarz#starz in wonderland#x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#leona x reader#twst leona x reader#twst x reader#twst x you#twisted wonderland x you#twisted wonderland x reader#twst imagines#this kinda lazy#Leona Kingscholar x you#leona Kingscholar#disney twst#Twisted wonderland#twst
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Hello! I hope you had a great day/nightđĽ°
I was wondering If you could make a smutty fem reader x katsuki bakugo
the reader and bakugo have been together for some time and every time they had sex nothing really happened, the did it, did aftercare and went to bed (most of the times) but this time the reader was at bakugo's house visiting him but for some reason bakugo gets riled up and wants to do it with the reader, his parents weren't in the house anyway so he didn't need to stress about someone interrupting so in the end they end up having sex.
But katsukis mom and dad comes early and he doesn't notice, while the reader and katsuki are doing their thing Mitsuki hears strange noises come from bakugos bedroom. She ends up curious and walks towards his room to find out what was happening but then is meet with you and katsuki.
Katsuki gets really embarrassed but mitsuki isn't mad, instead she shouts "Are you finally making my grandkids"
You don't need to write a fanfic about this! You have full right to delete! But this is just an idea that has been roaming in my head for days and I just really want someone to write a fic abt thisđ
Anyways! I won't be sad or mad if you delete this, write it if only you're comfortableâ¤ď¸
(Also sorry for shifting between bakugo and katsuki I didn't know which of them to useđ
)
Heat of the Moment
The thing about Bakugo was that he had control. Most of the time.
Sure, he had a temper, and yeah, he was easy to rile up in a fight, but when it came to you? He always kept himself in check. He never let himself get too lost in it, never let his instincts take over, because he didnât want to overwhelm you.
That was⌠until tonight.
You werenât even trying to be subtle. Maybe it was the fact that his parents were gone, maybe it was just because you wanted to push his buttons, but every little thing you did was setting him off.
The way you sat so close to him on the couch, your thigh pressed against his. The way your fingers lazily traced the muscles in his forearm while you pretended to be watching the movie on the screen. The way you leaned in, lips just barely ghosting over his ear as you whispered, âYouâre so tense, Katsuki⌠want me to help you relax?â
And fuck, he tried. He really fucking tried to ignore it. To just smirk and brush it off like you werenât making his dick throb with every slow, deliberate movement.
But when you climbed onto his lap, straddling him without a second thought, and rolled your hips down against the growing bulge in his sweats?
That was it. That was the fucking breaking point.
His hands were on you in an instant, rough and possessive as he grabbed your waist and slammed you back down against his hard length. âYou think youâre fuckinâ cute, donât you?â His voice was low, dangerous, but the way his cock twitched against you gave away just how much you were affecting him.
You bit your lip, looking down at him with those teasing eyes that had been driving him insane all night. âMaybe,â you mused, rolling your hips again, slow and deliberate. âAre you gonna do something about it?â
A guttural growl rumbled in his chest before he flipped you onto your back, pressing you into the couch with his weight. His knee shoved between your thighs, spreading you open for him as he loomed over you, crimson eyes dark and full of hunger.
âOh, Iâm gonna do a lot more than something, baby,â he muttered, voice thick with lust. One hand shot under your shirt, fingers finding your breast and squeezing, rolling your nipple between his rough fingertips as his other hand slid down to your shorts. âGonna fuckinâ ruin you.â
You gasped as he shoved your shorts down, not bothering with finesse. His fingers slid between your thighs, pressing against your already slick folds. âFuck,â he groaned, a smirk tugging at his lips. âAll this from a little teasing? Youâre such a fuckinâ slut for me, arenât you?â
You whimpered, hips arching into his touch, and he chuckled darkly. âNah, donât even try to play shy now. You wanted this.â
And then he was lining up, shoving his sweats down just enough to free his cock. Thick, hard, already leaking precum. He didnât even teaseâhe just grabbed your hips, lined up, and thrust inside in one deep stroke.
The stretch was sudden, almost too much, but fuck, the way he groaned against your neck made it impossible to care. âSo fuckinâ tight,â he growled, giving you barely a second to adjust before pulling out and slamming back in, hard and fast.
You cried out, legs wrapping around his waist as he set a relentless pace, hips snapping against yours with loud, wet slaps. Every thrust had your head spinning, had your body arching up into him as he fucked you deep into the couch.
âIsnât this what you wanted, huh?â he panted, lips brushing against your ear. âWanted me to snap? Wanted me to fuck you like I couldnât wait another second?â
You moaned, nails digging into his back, and he grabbed your wrists, pinning them above your head as he drove into you even harder. âYouâre takinâ me so fuckinâ good,â he muttered, lips trailing down your neck, sucking a mark into your skin. âSo fuckinâ perfectâmade for me.â
His name fell from your lips over and over, breathless and desperate, and he drank in every sound, every little whimper. âYeah, thatâs it,â he groaned, pounding into you with reckless abandon. âCum for me, baby. Let me feel you.â
You didnât even need to be told. The coil in your stomach snapped, pleasure hitting you like a shockwave as your walls clamped down around him. Your whole body shook, a high-pitched moan spilling from your lips as you came hard around his cock.
Bakugo snarled, hips stuttering as he chased his own release, burying himself as deep as he could before spilling inside you with a guttural groan. His grip on your wrists tightened as he rode it out, panting against your neck before finally collapsing on top of you.
For a moment, the only sound in the room was the ragged breathing of both of you trying to come back down from the high. Then, finally, Bakugo chuckled, low and satisfied.
âNext time you wanna tease me,â he murmured, voice still husky from exertion, âjust tell me you wanna get fucked stupid, princess.â
You giggled breathlessly, running your fingers through his damp hair. âNoted.â
Though, judging by the way his cock twitched inside you again, it seemed like one round wasnât going to be enough tonight.
A while later, you were on it again.
Katsuki had barely given you a break before he was all over you, flipping you onto your stomach and muttering about how you were gonna âpay for riling him up like that.â Not that you were complaining.
The only problem? He was so lost in you that he didnât hear the front door open.
Didnât hear the sound of keys dropping into the bowl.
Didnât hear the unmistakable click of his motherâs heels as she walked down the hallway.
You, on the other hand, froze the second you heard a voice call out:
âWeâre home! Bakugo, did you clean theââ
And then, before either of you could react, before Katsuki could even think to moveâ
The bedroom door swung open.
Mitsuki Bakugo stood there, eyes wide, taking in the absolute disaster of a scene before her. Her son, bare-ass naked, hovering over you. Your face buried in the pillow, Katsukiâs hands gripping your hips. The sheer horror on your face as you registered what was happening.
For a moment, there was silence.
Thenâ
âHOLY FUCK, MOMâ!â
Katsuki launched himself off of you, scrambling for the sheets in sheer panic. You barely managed to yank a blanket over yourself before Mitsukiâs voice rang through the house:
âARE YOU FINALLY MAKING MY GRANDKIDS?!â
You wanted to die. Right there. On the spot. Instant cardiac arrest. Take me now.
Katsukiâs face was redder than his damn explosions. âWHAT THE HELL, OLD HAG? GET OUT!!â
But Mitsuki wasnât done. No, she was grinning. Grinning. Hands on her hips like this was the best news of her life.
âDamn, about time!â she continued, ignoring the way Katsuki was practically combusting. âI was starting to think you were incapableââ
âSHUT UP!!â Katsuki grabbed the nearest objectâa pillowâand launched it at her with enough force to send it flying down the hallway.
Mitsuki just cackled, dodging effortlessly. âMake sure youâre using protection, bratâunless youâre actually trying to give me grandkidsââ
âOUT!!â
With one last laugh, she finally strolled out, still muttering about how she was âtoo young to be a grandma, but still, wouldnât mind a little mini-Katsuki running around.â
The moment the door slammed shut, Katsuki flopped onto his back, covering his face with both hands.
Neither of you spoke.
Neither of you could speak.
Until finally, after what felt like an eternity, you whispered:
ââŚSo, uh. Round three?â
Katsuki groaned. âI hate you.â
But the way he rolled back over you said otherwise.
#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#bakugou x y/n#bakugou x you#bakugou x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#x reader#bakugo x reader#bakugo x you#bakugo x y/n#bnha#mha#mha fanfiction#my hero academia#boku no hero academia
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Suspicious Minds
Pairing: Emperor Geta/wife!reader
Summary: A senator informs Geta about the rumors surrounding his wife
Author's Note: This fic consists of pieces I took out from a much longer fic I had written. After reading what I originally wrote I didn't really vibe with the whole thing and so I took out parts I liked best to create this fic. Idk if it's better or worse because things feel a bit rushed in this fic now and not as cohesive as before but it's good enough I think ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ I was partly inspired by Fire & Blood where it says that some in court found Queen Rhaenys Targaryen suspicious because she spent time with bards and singers and they were sure she must be having an affair on Aegon I. Also the title is from the Elvis song of the same name because it popped into my head while writing this because it's similar to the plot lol.
~~~
The late afternoon sun streamed through the marble arches of the palace, casting shadows across the floor of the Emperorâs private chamber. Emperor Geta paced restlessly, his jaw clenched tight, his fingers twitching. The rumors had come to him this morning, carried by a senator whose words had been carefully chosen, yet laced with venom.
âShe is often seen in the company of poets and bards, my Emperor. Some say perhaps too often.â
The words echoed in Getaâs mind as he strode to the balcony. Below him, others strolled about, oblivious to the storm brewing in his heart. He had always known that his wife had a fondness for the arts. It was one of the things that had drawn him to her. The way her eyes lit up when she heard the verses of a poem she thought was interesting, the soft smile that graced her lips during the final notes of a ballad. She was a woman of intelligence and charm. Perfect qualities to be his empress.
But now those very same qualities and interests had become the source of his unrest.
~
Geta finds his wife out in the garden. âI had hoped to speak with you my wife,â he said, his tone polite but firm.Â
âWhat troubles you, my love?â she asked, her brow furrowing as she stepped closer to him.
Geta studied her, his gaze lingering on her face, searching for some sign of guilt. But she looked as she always did, serene, composed, and beautiful. âThere are whispers in the court,â he began slowly, âthat your affection for music and poetry has extended beyond mere appreciation.â
His wifeâs eyes widened, and then she laughed softly, a sound like the chiming of bells. âSurely you donât believe such nonsense.â
âI donât want to,â Geta admitted, his voice low. âBut the court is not kind to a woman who spends her days surrounded by other men, no matter how innocent her intentions.â
Her smile faded, and she placed a hand on his arm. âGeta, these men are poets, musicians and artists. They speak to me about the soul, not the flesh. My heart belongs to you, and only you.â
He wanted to believe her. He needed to believe her. But the thought of her laughter, her attention, her admiration being bestowed on another man gnawed at him. âThen why do others speak of you so?â he demanded, his voice rising slightly. âWhy do they say you adore Bacchus so much that you have embraced his indulgences?â
His wife stiffened, her hand falling away. âDo you question my virtue?â she asked, insulted that her husband would believe such nonsense about her.
âI question the company you keep!â he snapped, the words sharper than he intended.
She took a step back, her expression conveying her hurt and frustration. âYou have always known who I am Geta. I am not a woman content to sit idly in the palace, just simply gossiping my day away. I find joy in the divine chaos of creation. If that makes me suspicious in the eyes of our court then so be it. But I will not apologize for things I did not do.â
Her words hung in the air between them, heavy with emotion. Geta clenched his fists, his anger warring with his love for her. Finally he spoke, his voice softer. âI do not wish to stifle you. But I cannot bear the thought of others questioning your loyalty or your love for me.â
His wife stepped closer, her gaze steady. âThen let me reassure you, my emperor. I am as sure of my love for you as I am about Sol bringing us the sun each morning. But if you doubt me, then tell me what must I do to prove myself?â
He sighed, reaching out to cup her face in his hands. âStay with me tonight,â he murmured. âLet the poets and bards sing their songs without you for once. Let Bacchus have his revelry elsewhere.â
She smiled faintly, leaning into his touch. âIf it will ease your mind, my dear husband then I will stay.â
Geta pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly as if to shield her from the whispers that sought to undermine them. But even as he held her, a shadow of doubt lingered, refusing to be banished entirely.
~
The grand halls of the palace echoed with the click of her delicate sandals against the marble floor. The weight of her husbandâs arm on her shoulder was both reassuring and suffocating. For the past three days, Geta had not let her out of his sight. Where she went, he followed. Where he could not follow, he sent his guards to watch her every step. It was unlike him, and though his paranoia was silent, she could feel it in the way his fingers tightened around her arm, in the watchful, almost desperate glint in his eyes.
She had tried to comfort him, tried to reassure him of her loyalty, but it seemed no words could pierce through the suspicion that had taken hold of him.
During a feast, Geta watched his wife like a hawk as she entertained a visiting nobleman whose son had written a collection of poems. His wife listened to the man intently, her soft smile never wavering as the man recited a verse.
But Geta saw something else. He saw how the manâs eyes lingered on her, how her laughter seemed to light up the room. His fingers dug into the armrests of his chair, his jaw tightening. Was it admiration? Was it mere courtesy? Or was there something more? The thoughts churned in his mind like a storm, dark and unrelenting.
When the man left, Geta wasted no time. He rose abruptly, crossing the room to where his wife stood.
âYou enjoyed his company,â he said, his voice low but laced with accusation.
His wife blinked, startled by his tone. âHe was reciting his sonâs poetry, my dear husband. Thatâs all it was.â
âYou smiled at him,â Geta pressed, his eyes narrowing. âYou laughed.â
âAm I not allowed to smile and laugh?â she asked softly, though there was a tinge of frustration in her voice. âMust I always wear a sour expression to please you?â
His hand shot out, gripping her chin and forcing her to look up at him. âYou are mine,â he said, his voice trembling - not with anger, but with something deeper, something more fragile. âYour smiles, your laughter, they belong to me and no one else.â
Her eyes softened as she saw the flicker of insecurity behind his harsh words. She reached up, covering his hand with her own. âAnd they are yours, Geta,â she murmured. âOnly yours.â
His grip loosened, and he pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly as if afraid she might vanish. âI will not lose you,â he whispered, his voice barely audible. âI cannot.â
~
For the next several days, Getaâs wifeâs world shrank. Where she once wandered the gardens freely, now her husband walked beside her, his hand resting possessively on her waist. When she visited the library, he went with her. Her gatherings with poets and musicians were no more, replaced by dinners where Geta sat her beside him, his eyes never leaving her.
She tried to be understanding, but his constant scrutiny weighed heavily on her. One evening, as they sat together in their chambers, she finally spoke.
âGeta,â she began, her voice tentative. âDo you not trust me?â
He looked up from the goblet of wine in his hand, his expression guarded. âOf course I trust you, you are my wife,â he said after a long pause. âIt is everyone else I do not trust.â
âYou cannot keep watch over me forever,â she said.
His jaw tightened. âYou are my wife,â he said firmly. âMy empress. And I will not risk anyone else taking you from me.â
âEven if it means suffocating me?â she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Geta flinched, as if her words had struck him. He set the goblet down and rose to his feet, pacing the room. âYou do not understand,â he said, his voice low and strained. âI have enemies everywhere. We have enemies everywhere. They would use you against me. They would take you from me. Take your love away from meâ
âWho could take me when I am yours in both heart and soul?â she asked, rising to stand before him.
He stopped, his gaze meeting hers. For a moment, he looked like a man on the edge of breaking, his carefully constructed armor of intimidation cracking to reveal the fear beneath. âI donât know,â he admitted, his voice trembling. âBut the thought of losing you terrifies me.â
She reached out, cupping his face in her hands. âGeta,â she said softly, âyou will not lose me. I love you.â
He closed his eyes, leaning into her touch. âPromise me,â he whispered. âPromise me you will never leave me.â
âI promise,â she said, though her heart ached at the desperation in his voice.
He pulled her into his arms again, holding her as if his life depended on it. She sighed softly, resting her head against his chest. She understood that his possessiveness was not born of cruelty, nor out of a need to stifle her but it was of a fear he could not truly voice, a fear he could not truly reconcile with, and it had consumed him.
And so she stayed, tethered to him by her love for him, hoping that soon his insecurities would ease and he would see that she was his, not because he demanded it, but because she chose it. But she was not sure how much she could take of this suffocating behavior. Of every move of hers and every interaction being heavily watched.
~
She rarely let her frustrations boil to the surface, but this time was different. As she sat across from her husband in their private chambers, the weight of the senatorâs venomous words and their impact on her marriage gnawed at her patience. For days and days now, Getaâs suffocating possessiveness had taken over every aspect of her life, and she could no longer bear the thought that this rift between them had been instigated by a man seeking to undermine her, a man seeking to replace her.
She set down her goblet with a sharp clink, her hands trembling, not with fear, but with barely restrained annoyance and anger. âIâve been thinking, my dear husband,â she began, her voice calm but carrying an obvious edge to it.
Geta glanced up from his seat, his brow furrowing slightly at her tone. âWhat is it?â
She met his gaze, her eyes blazing with uncharacteristic determination. âThe senator who came to you with these baseless rumors. I believe he must be punished.â
Geta blinked, clearly surprised. âPunished? For what?â
âFor daring to speak against me,â she replied, her voice firm, slightly exasperated that he did not already know what she spoke of. âFor poisoning your mind with lies and causing this⌠this chaos between us. He sought to undermine your confidence in me, to cast doubt on my loyalty, to possibly destroy my reputation. That is not something we should let go unanswered.â
Geta leaned back in his chair, studying her intently. âYou surprise me, wife. I thought you were above petty revenge. You have always counseled me against such rash decisions beforeâ
âThis is not petty, nor is it rash!â she shot back, her tone sharpening. âHe sought to disgrace me, your wife, your empress. By doing so, he has disgraced you as well. How can you tolerate such audacity?â
Her words struck a nerve. Getaâs insecurities flared, his mind racing as he considered her argument. She was right. The senatorâs insinuations had not only called his wifeâs loyalty into question but had also implied that Geta was a weak ruler, unable to control his own household. The thought made his blood boil.
âWhat would you have me do?â he asked, his voice low.
âDemote him. Remove him from his position. Let it be known that you will not tolerate slander against your Empress.â
Geta narrowed his eyes. âAnd if others see this as an act of weakness? A sign that I am blinded by my love for you?â
âLet them see it as a warning,â she countered. âLet them know that your loyalty to your wife is unwavering and that you will not allow anyone to sow baseless discord in your court.â
Her words appealed to Getaâs pride, and she could see the gears turning in his mind. After a long silence, he nodded slowly. âVery well. The senator will be dealt with. Iâll ensure his removal will be public and soon.â
Relief washed over her, though a part of her felt dissatisfied about simply just having the senator removed from his position. The senator had meddled in her marriage, made her husband watch every move she made for days now, and he deserved to face more severe consequences for it. The senator has a daughter around her age, she felt certain the senator was likely hoping to get her pushed aside to potentially make way for his daughter to get close to Geta, for her to be the next Empress of Rome. Getaâs wife seethed silently at the thought of someone replacing her, of someone attempting to steal her position. She thought about paying Caracalla a visit and informing him of the treacherous senator in their midst. He would certainly give her the dramatic reaction she wants.
Geta rose from his seat, crossing the room to stand before her. He cupped her face in his hands, his gaze softening. âYou are right. I should never have allowed his words to poison my mind. You are my empress, my wife. No one will come between us againâ
She smiled faintly, leaning into his touch and calming for a moment. âAnd I will always stand by your side Geta. But we must stand together, against anyone who seeks to divide us.â
Geta kissed her then, fierce and possessive, as if to reaffirm their bond. She let herself melt into the embrace, even as a small voice in the back of her mind wondered if she should push for more to be done about the senator.Â
~~~~
reader can't take out her frustrations on Geta so she will take it out on the senator who started all of this instead lol
#emperor Geta x reader#Geta x reader#emperor Geta x you#gladiator 2#gladiator fanfiction#gladiator x reader
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I really love your New home sweet home au and I really want to see the toys taking care of Y/N since heâs has a fever :
Like one day, Y/N comes back from work and sees the toys in the living room and then he says something and passes out due to the fever. And the toys taking care of him since he saved them.
Everyone thinks y/n just died. Until dog day just found out they just have a fever. All it was is a cold and basically the only ones who kinda know how to help with a cold is the smiling critters and miss delight. They basically try and take care of y/n because they kinda know what their doing as miss delight knows how colds work as she's a teacher and knows basics of human anatomy and a lot of other stuff because well she was made to be a teacher back in playcare so that's what she had kept in here memory.
Yarnaby isn't allowed to be in the room with y/n because the moment he is, he's hopping onto the bed and laying down with y/n and may even get yarnaby sick. So yarnaby kinda sits at the door of y/n's room, doey every 5 minutes goes up to check on y/n as luckily he can stretch his neck and arms to get to y/n. Because once he went to the second floor and ended up nearly breaking through it but luckily didn't. He's like 900 pounds of dough so that pretty heavy but he can go upstairs for a little bit but not for long. But he tries and always checks up on y/n and poor dude is worried cause so many toys in the safe haven got sick sometimes and Doey was so worried for them the whole time.
Mommy long legs basically looking through cook books and cook books for something that y/n could eat without having to throw up or just having something easy for the stomach. The doctor, he thinks this worrying is just idiotic as he knows y/n will get better but still, Harley does make sure y/n is living and breathing. And the bunzo comes up into y/n's room to kinda talk about random things to keep y/n entertained and not bored but bunzo ended up talking about a random green spring he found and the newest episode of a show. Boogie bot is kinda the only one who kinda takes y/n's temperature, gives medicine and other stuff and all because it's hard to get a robot sick plus dog day and Doey are genuinely tweaking because they are in the safe haven mind set thinking that there is no medicine and stuff like that.
But after y/n feels healthy again. The toys are relieved and Harley is relieved as well because he wants to keep his room and bro is not willing to give up this nice ass house life. Also yarnaby goes back to sleeping in y/n's room again after y/n gets better. As soon is catnap in his smaller form as it helps him keep a eye on y/n and also to sleep more peacefully than hearing KickinChicken snore for the whole night.
(thats it for my yap session, hopefully my writing is getting slightly better but If you like that please don't feel shy and request any ideas for stories or anything. But for now please stay safe and drink water!)
#yandere x male reader#x male reader#yandere x reader#yandere x you#x gn reader#yandere x gn reader#male reader#yandere x darling#poppy playtime x male reader#yandere poppy playtime#poppy playtime horror game#poppy playtime#poppy playtime x reader#x gn y/n#new home sweet home au
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âđ âââ a cluttered scrapbook: send in any thoughts on any of the characters below for a blurb .á
omg hello congratulations??? literally love your blog sm. youâre writing is peak and so perf. i was thinking, we all know rafe is a âproactiveâ type of person (or so he says). so how would he react to reader giving him the silent treatment after she found out something? (maybe he was doing cocaine again after she explicitly asked him not to anymore???) and what antics would he use to get reader talking to him??
once again, congratulations to you. you deserve so much!!! so proud of you <3333
thank you so much !! i'm so sorry it took so long to get to this </3
cw: dark rafe, manipulation, controlling behavior, threats of self harm
Rafe hates the silent treatment. It feels like a slap in the face. After everything he's done for you, you can't even give him the basic respect of talking things out?
He had done a great job of hiding his ongoing cocaine addiction after you'd threatened to break up with him if he didn't stop. He absolutely couldn't stand ultimatums, being backed into a corner, but he also couldn't lose you, so he promised he would quit and get clean, even pretending to go off to a rehab facility for a monthâduring which he was actually going on a month-long bender in a fancy hotel up in California.
And his lies had worked. For months, he hid his addiction, leading you to believe that he was finally clean and that he had done it for you.
But then, you dropped your phone one night at his house, and it had found its way under his bed. Leaning down to retrieve it, you pushed up the bottom of his comforter and found yourself greeted by the sight of a wooden box you'd seen beforeâthe very one you had watched Rafe throw away before he went off to "rehab".
With shaky hands, you opened the box and found yourself staring at a baggie of white powder, a substance you knew all too well.
"What are you doing?" Rafe's voice came from the doorway, sharp and defensive. He knew he had been caught, but his mind was already swirling with blame for you rather than accepting the consequences of his own actions. Why were you snooping around his room? Did you not trust him?
You looked up at him, your mind running a million miles a minute as a plethora of emotions overwhelmed you at once. You didn't want to talk to him. You could barely even stomach looking at him right now, so without a word, you grabbed your phone from where it had fallen and stood up abruptly.
He caught your arm as you tried to leave. "Oh, we're doing this now? Real mature," he scoffed at your behavior. You were being dramatic, childish even, by subjecting him to the silent treatment instead of trying to talk this out like adults.
You simply pulled your arm back from him roughly, not meeting his gaze as you pushed past him and hurried down the stairs. He should've followed you, but his pride and ego stopped him. You would come crawling back, apologizing for how you acted. He was sure of it.
But, you didn't. Days went by without a word, and he started to get antsy, started to spiral as paranoia overtook him. You were his. How dare you ignore him? Were you off with another guy? Were you with your awful Pogue friends? He couldn't stand not knowing where you were and having you with him every minute.
At first, he tried to manipulate his way out of it by feigning an apology and ending it with a guilt trip, texting you things like "Okay, I messed up, but you just shutting me out? That's fucked up. Just talk to me, baby," and "It's not like I was doing it all the time. I mean, cmon, are you really gonna throw everything away over this? It's nothing."
When you refused to be won over so easily, seeing right through his tactics, he would start showing up wherever you wereâhome, work, the beach, anywhere you were, he was there too, desperately trying to intimidate you into talking to him with his piercing gaze and menacing stance.
He would corner you, trying to force a reaction out of you. "So what, you're just going to act like I don't exist?" He'd ask harshly before softening, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his knuckle lightly grazing your cheek as he did. "C'mon, baby, I know you miss me, miss us." He could see the resolve in your eyes crumbling and it made him feel powerful and triumphant, but before you opened your mouth to speak, Kiara swept in, grabbing your arm and tugging you away from Rafe as she shot a glare in his direction.
This infuriated Rafe. Typical Pogue, always sticking their nose where it doesn't belong and fucking up his life.
From there, he attempted sending you expensive gifts with notes like "Just talk to me, baby. Let me fix this," and when that didn't work, he turned to threats, saying he would hurt himself or you if you didn't hear him out.
Finally, he showed up to your house in the middle of the night, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, pupils dilated. You hesitated but decided to open the door, and when you did, you felt guilty for ignoring him for so long. He looked absolutely wrecked like he hadn't eaten or slept in days. He was clenching and unclenching his jaw, leaning against the doorframe and peering down at you. His presence was heavy, the air thick with tension as neither of you spoke.
"Let me in," he demanded. His fingers twitched at his sides before he rubbed them over his jaw. "I justâfuck, I donât even know what to do anymore, baby." His large frame blocked the doorway, making you feel small as his eyes darted wildly. You felt a mix of guilt and fear stir in your stomach. "Youâre just gonna keep pretending I donât exist? Really?" His voice dropped lower, rougher. "âCause if you donât talk to me now, I swear to God, Iâllâ" He stopped himself, his jaw clenching as he stared at you with hardened eyes, the threat clear. You knew he meant it.
"Rafe..." You said quietly, your voice trembling slightly as you looked up at him with wide eyes, feeling like you were looking at someone you didn't recognize.
His lips quirked up in a way that sent a shiver down your spine. âThatâs all I needed, baby. Just needed to hear your voice," he whispered, stepping forward to invade your space and force you backward so he could come inside. "Y'know, I'd do anything for you, right?" He asked, the question rhetorical as he reached out to grip your jaw, forcing you to look at him. "Iâve been losing my fucking mind without you. I won't lose you. I can't lose you, alright? I-I need you. You're mine, you got that? You can't just walk away. You can't just ignore me. I won't let you."
#đ#đŚš × đ đ sol writes .á#đ
ŕৠsol &&. ch4rrykisses ďź#đŚš × đ đĽ sol's 1k celebration .á#soleil's asks <3#answered !#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe cameron angst#rafe angst#rafe cameron x you#rafe x you#outer banks#obx#obx rafe cameron#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#outerbanks rafe#outerbanks
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PATCH UP DUTY! ŕźâ§âË.
synopsis: your shinobi boyfriend got hurt on a mission, and luckily for them their trusty girlfriend is here to help! (mentions of wounds and blood, SFW) FT. Gaara, Naruto, Sasuke, and Shikamaru
a/n: finally im back!! missed writing more than I expected lol also sorry naruto fans I didn't know what to do with him really!! (â  â â§â Đâ âŚâ )
â SILENCE. (FT. GAARA)â
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3bdf6c84dca95ac9e668a36d0392b4ed/2e0188554d6e5888-ba/s540x810/7e158ccd882748859c73d7df9f105e8265dc6635.jpg)
"You don't have to do this, (Y/N)." Gaara murmurs, resting his arm on the table. You ignore his comment, unraveling a roll of gauze. Sitting there patiently, he watches as you carefully formulate your supplies with precision.
Grabbing a chair next to him, you begin to treat his wound. A large slash down his forearm, yet shallow enough to not cause any substantial issues. But the bleeding alone was enough to make you pout.
Meticulously dabbing a cloth over his wound, not a single word escapes from either one of you. Steady breathing fills the empty silence, a comforting phenomenon that always came along with Gaara. He wasnt the type to speak unless he had to, even then his sentences remained short and meaningful.
Picking up a swab coated in sterile saline, then patting it along the gash, You glance up to check Gaara for any signs of discomfort, an instinct that came along with treating injuries.
Suddenly, your rhythmic movements halt abruptly.
Your eyes meet.
For a moment neither of you move. His cold teal eyes grasp yours, indecipherable but fierce. Almost like he was studying you, memorizing the way your eyebrows furrowed with concentration, the way your eyes squint slightly as you focus. There's no falter nor embarrassed look awayâonly fixed tranquility.
He still doesn't look away.
Gaara isn't the type of person to shy away when he's caught staring, especially if it's something he's infatuated by. Instead his gaze intensifies, as if he's trying to understand somethingâhimself. Why does he feel this odd warmth in his chest every time he's around your vicinity? Why does his heart slow but his breathing quicken as soon as he feels your delicate touch? It's all so new to him.
You catch a glimpse of something that crosses his face. Although hard to catch, you still caught it. A rare tenderness he rarely allowed himself to show.
"...Does it hurt?" You ask gently.
Immediately, his lips part, like he wants to say something. But instead, he simply shakes his head "No. It's fine."
However, his eyes still haven't let you go. At least not yet. Not until you look away first, flustered by his silent potency. And even then, he's still watching, his thoughts unsolvable, his heart struggling to make sense of feelings he's never felt before.
â BIG BABY! (FT. NARUTO) â
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"Ow, ow, OWâ (Y/N), you're killing me!" Naruto whines throwing his head back like he's just been stabbed in the chest.
You glare at him, pressing the antiseptic soaked rag against the scrape on his cheek. "It's just a tiny scratch, you big baby."
"A tiny scratch?... Do you see the SIZE of this thing? I was fighting for my life out there!" He puffs, pointing at the scrape. You sigh loudly, muttering about how ridiculous he is, Naruto crossing his arms childishly at the comment.
Tossing the rag aside, you grab a glass bottle filled with ointment. "You literally get punched through walls, but this is where you draw the line?" You retort, leaning in closer to spread the ointment more precisely
But unknowingly, you closed in the last bit of space between you two, the lack of air making Naruto's brain go fuzzy. Actually, he was completely frozen. Too stunned to speak. His usual goofy demeanour falters for just a moment, his breath pausing as heat rises to his face. He's blinking rapidly, unsure of where to look. He's lost in the way your fingers gently grasp his jaw, tilting his head slightly backwards. And he's fixated on the pacing of your breathing too, feeling the warm air against his cheek.
Fuck. You were way too close. He swallows hard, "Uh..." He scrambles to find his words, for the first time, the Ultimate Knucklehead Ninja is speechless.
You raise an eyebrow, feigning innocence as if the close proximity wasn't a part of your plan. "What? You were just talking a mile a minute, and now you're quiet?" You spit, lips curled slightly as you spread the thick medication across his cheek.
Naruto quickly averts his gaze, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. "N-Nothing... Just... uh... you must be really focused, huh?" He lets out a nervous chuckle, trying to slow down the sudden pounding in his chest.
Rolling your eyes, you twist the cap back onto the bottle. Adjusting himself on the couch, Naruto tries to retrieve his cool, as if his face weren't a bright tomato red. You continue patching Naruto up, still bickering back and forth with him. Only this time, he seemed to be a bit more jittery and shaky with his responses.
But later, when you're finished and packing away your supplies, you swear you hear him mumble something under his breath. Something that makes you smile not matter how much you stifle it back.
"Man... I think I just feel for you even harder..."
â STUBBORNESS (FT. SASUKE) â
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"I'm fine."
You exhale sharply, ignoring Sasuke's regular resistance. Placing a cloth over the gash and then applying mild pressure, you attempt to stop the bleeding from his neck. "You're bleeding, Sasuke."
He doesn't flinch, nor does he wince. Instead he's just sitting there, stuff but compliant. His arms are crossed, like this whole situation was just some minor inconvenience. Of course. It wasn't unusual for Sasuke to act so detached, always pretending to be unaffected yet his body always said the opposite.
You shake your head, "Just let me help, okay?"
Sasuke sighs through his nose, but doesn't dispute with you any further. That was the most compliance you'll ever get out of him.
The wound on his neck wasn't deep, simply messy. Dried blood strips near the opening, and despite his bluffed collectiveness, you could tell he's exhausted. It wasn't uncommon to see Sasuke injured, oftentimes training tirelessly, or engaging with enemies he underestimated way too much. But this time, you could tell he wasn't just worn out physically.
Too lost in your thoughts, you accidentally prod the cloth a bit too harshly, making him tense up for a moment. Not a flinch, but you swore you heard his breath quietly hitch.
"Sorry," you murmur.
Sasuke though, doesn't say anything. But as you continue, grabbing other materials, you treat his wounds with extra care. Fingers grazing his skin with gentleless, you begin to notice something. His breathing slows. His once taut shoulders are now relaxed under your touch.
He isn't just tolerating this, but he's allowing it.
There's something strangely intimate about this silence. Perhaps it's the way, you're the only one he lets close like this.
Then you feel it. His gaze locked on you.
Holding the gauze in your hand, you pause.
"Sasuke?"
But still, no answer.
You peek up at him, expecting his eyes to rush away like they always do, but he doesn't. His distant black eyes are now fixated on you, unreadable, steady, yet softer than usual. They lacked their usual sharpness, but instead grew of quiet observation.
The sight sends your heart into your throat.
"...What?" You ask, voice barely above a whisper.
He blinks, laggard and calculated. His lips part ever so slightly, like he's about to speak but he doesn't. Instead, after a moment, he exhales and mutters, "Nothing."
Taking in his answer, you continue on with patching him up. But his gaze lingers, still focused on you. Even after you finish patching him up. Because as he stands to leave, his lips part open again, like there's something on his chest that's dying to come out.
And then, he turns away, his voiceâlow and nearly inaudible.
"...You don't have to worry about me so much."
â GENTLE (FT. SHIKAMARU) â
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0b7ff79038c7143892df165f93b05aad/2e0188554d6e5888-4d/s540x810/0f504eeaeb13af5878e5eb9ed652aad3b6f5ad37.jpg)
"This is such a drag..."
Shikamaru groans, resting his head against the wall as you kneel beside him, tending to the slash across his chest. He's always complaining and always acting like everything takes up so much of his precious energy. But he hasn't moved an inch since you've started.
"You say that like I'm the one who got you hurt," you mutter, blotting a rag over his wound.
A long and slow breathe escapes his lungs, "Tch. Guess that's fair."
His voice is low and sluggish, like sitting here was simply exhausting. Despite having a fresh injury, he seems to be half asleep. Typical. You should've expected him to act like this was more tiring than the actual fight.
"Hold still," you say, pressing a bandage against his skin tightly.
Shikamaru doesn't even flinch. Doesn't really react at all, reallyâexcept for the way his eyes flicker downwards watching the way your fingers dance over his chest, you brows knitting together in silent concentration.
You don't notice at first, only until the silence begins to grow way too suspicious.
You glance up, only for him to be looking back at you.
You waver, gripping the roll of bandage.
"What?"
But, he only blinks at you, hushed but calculated, unbothered at the fact you just caught him staring. In his eyes, there's no sign of embarrassment nor instant divergence. Just quiet deliberate eyes, like he's studying a foreign topic.
"You're being weird," you comment, focusing your attention to bandaging him up.
Shikamaru's lips twitch into a lazy smirk. "Nah. Just thinking."
"Thinking about what?"
He pauses, and so do you. His eyes dart towards somethingânot away but lower, to where your hands are still resting on his chest, rising up and down as he breathes.
"You're pretty gentle," he murmurs.
Your breath catches to the back of your throat. But before you can respond, he leans his head back again, shutting his eyes like he's done speaking.
Shaking off the unexpected heat in your cheeks, you huff "You say that like you expected me to be rough."
"Didn't say that," He mutters, eyes still shut.
"Then?"
He exhales a small tired sigh. And then without opening his eyes:
"I think I could get used to this"
Your hands still for half a second, but he doesn't say anything else. Instead he lets the silence between you two settle, as if it were meant to be there.
And when you finally pull back, he doesn't move right away.
Like he's in no rush to leave your touch.
#naruto x reader#naruto fluff#naruto uzumaki#gaara x reader#gaara fluff#gaara of the sand#sasuke uchiha#sasuke x reader#sasuke fluff#Sasuke#shikamaru nara#shikamaru x reader#Shikamaru fluff#SFW#born to serve#fluff#fanfiction#yummy yum yum#gaara my poor baby#sasuke fake nonchalant#sultrysparkles
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I Cut Out Social Media for 30 Days and It Changed My Life
Okay hefty title, but I mean every word of it.
Over January I followed a book called Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. I'm sure you've already been lectured to death about how bad technology and social media is for you, so I won't repeat the statistics here. What I will say is that Newport suggests that there are also positives to technology and that abandoning it altogether is not realistic. Instead, he proposes that we define our values, and then use technology to attain them--rather than allowing technology to define what values we should hold.
To do this, Newport suggests a complete "detox" of non-essential technologies for 30 days. That means abstaining from social media, netflix and other streaming services, videogames, etc. But of course still being able to phone loved ones, email for work, and use google maps if you're going somewhere new, etc. In doing this detox, he proposes that we will be able to better understand what values we hold as people, not just as consumers of technology.
He was right.
At first I found it really hard. Right away I noticed that any activity other than doomscrolling and watching endless hours of Youtube took a lot more brain power. I started doing puzzles, reading, writing (a lot!), cooking and baking, and taking many walks with my dog. By the end of the day I'd be fuzzy and exhausted, and all I wanted to do was curl up on the couch and watch my favourite shows. I didn't, but I wanted to.
But then I started to notice my "brain stamina" (I'm sure there's a better term for it but oh well) started to improve. Instead of writing for two hours before getting fuzzy, I could write for four. And then six. And then eight. Slowly, I found myself being able to do more in a day, to focus for longer on one task, and I didn't feel as drained by the end of it. I had a clearer mind, I could remember things a lot better, I was no longer struggling to find really easy words--they just came to me.
This all also resulted in me spending so much more time with my friends and family. I realized that I really valued this time--and that it wasn't something I could replace by hitting 'like' on an instagram post from them. I rediscovered community, passion, and in many ways, humanity.
It was like I was looking at the world in a new way. I started to notice more, be curious about more. I kind of remember being this way as a kid, and I couldn't believe how I had ever let that go. Now, the idea of sitting on my couch and watching hours and hours of Youtube in every moment of my free time feels inconceivable.
However, my 30 days are up, and so Newport suggests setting some rules to reintroduce what technology I believe supports my values. I've decided not to return to Instagram, but that I do value keeping up to date with the gaming community and pop culture, which I do on Youtube. Now, Youtube is something that I watch for a couple hours on weekends, instead of eating up every bit of free time I have. I also value interacting with other writers and the writing community, so I've created a couple hours in my schedule to check Tumblr and my Discord and keep up to date with you guys here.
But now most of my free time is spent reading or writing, or being with my family and friends, and I value that most of all. To demonstrate how much has changed, in the months before my detox, I wrote maybe 2500 words. Since my detox, I've written 40 000. Last year, I read about four books. In just one month during my detox, I read 10.
If this sounds like something you'd be interested in trying for yourself, feel free to reach out to me! I'd love to talk more about my experience and things that worked or didn't work for me. I'd also really recommend the book, it was incredibly helpful in determining what rules were healthy to set and how to get out of technology and then back in with success.
Back to usual content soon :-)
#digital detox#social media#self care#digital minimalism#writing#creative writing#writing community#writers#writing inspiration#novel writing#readers#book community#book readers#fanfic#fan fiction#fic community#writing advice#writing tips#writing help
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I luv the headcanons and would love my tiger kwon soonyoung PLEASE :))))
hoshi's headcanon when he falls for someone (you)
kwon soonyoung (hoshi) x gn!reader
Ëâ¡ ÍÍÍÍâłâĽ tags / genre: hoshi x reader, seventeen fanfiction, lighthearted romance, playful banter, mutual pining, holiday vibes, cozy fluff, heartwarming moments, reader insert, wholesome love story, gentle humor, soft romance ŕŠâŠâ§âË warnings: n/a (just lots of giggles, flirty hoshi energy, warm hugs, and soft moments that make your heart flutter. mwahaha) ŕŠâŠâ§âË wc: 3443 ŕŠâĄ a/n: 3/13 ! (reqsts are open for the next member !). ILYSM ANON FOR REQUESTING A HOSHI ONEE ! i loved writing this one a little too much, i might've reached a word count of 10,000 + if my friend didn't stop me. ă
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(p.s. im sorry. i forgot to post this.) ᴺᴟᾠᴞᴸᴏáľá´ľá´şá´ł : Falling For U (Seventeen) á´ á´Ęá´á´á´ : âŽâŽâŽâŽâŽâŽâŽâŽâŽ
ŕŠâĄË ŕźÂ hoshi's headcanon when he falls for someone
when hoshi falls for someone, it's impossible for him to hide it. his feelings shine through in every interaction, whether it's the way he lights up when you walk into a room or the endless excuses he finds to spend time with you. his love is loud and vibrant, like him, but it's also layered with an unexpected softness that makes it all the more special.
he's the type to shower you with compliments, sometimes silly and sometimes sincere, just to see you smile. he'll call you "the most amazing person in the world" one minute and then jokingly ask if you're honored to have his attention the next. his playful nature is his way of keeping things light, but underneath, there's a deep sincerity. every teasing, every exaggerated gesture is hoshi's way of showing he cares.
you'll notice he goes out of his way to include you in his worldâwhether it's dragging you to try out something he's excited about or sharing random tiger facts (because, obviously, you need to know). he's full of energy, and he loves the idea of making you laugh or helping you forget a bad day. but when you're down, hoshi knows how to tone it down, offering you quiet support and reminding you he's there for you in the most heartfelt ways.
if he's jealous, it's not subtle. he'll pout and dramatically insist he's the best option for your attention, though he'd never make you feel uncomfortable. it's all in good funâhis way of showing that he cares deeply. when you reassure him, the grin that spreads across his face makes it clear he just wanted a little extra love from you.
hoshi's love language is loud, affectionate, and completely unfiltered. but when it's time for him to confess, you'll see a more vulnerable side of him. he'll still try to keep things light, stumbling over his words and making jokes to cover up his nerves, but the way his voice softens and his eyes meet yours will leave no doubt about how much he means every word.
with hoshi, falling in love isn't just a feelingâit's an experience. his love is like a sunrise, warm and full of energy, and once you're at the center of his world, you'll never doubt just how much you mean to him.
it was late, the soft hum of the night wrapping the room in a quiet stillness. hoshi sat on the couch, one leg tucked under him, a half-empty bowl of popcorn balanced on his lap. the tv was on, playing some rom-com neither of you had really been paying attention to. his eyes kept drifting to you, though you were too engrossed in your phone to notice.
you were sitting cross-legged on the floor, leaning against the couch, absentmindedly scrolling and laughing at something every now and then. hoshi couldn't help but smile, the kind of smile that stretched across his face before he even realized it.
"kwon soonyoung," you teased, breaking his trance. you twisted around to look up at him, eyebrows raised. "what's that look for? are you laughing at me?"
he blinked, caught off guard, before shaking his head with an exaggerated pout. "me? never! why would i laugh at you?"
"then what?" you pressed, squinting at him. "you've been weirdly quiet. it's suspicious."
hoshi leaned back into the couch, suddenly aware of how warm his ears felt. he reached for another handful of popcorn, buying time to figure out what to say. how was he supposed to tell you that he wasn't laughing at you, but that just looking at you made him feel all sorts of things he couldn't explain?
"i was just... thinking," he said vaguely, popping a piece of popcorn into his mouth.
you gave him a look, clearly unimpressed. "thinking about what? and don't say 'stuff.' i'm not letting you get away with that."
he groaned, dragging a hand down his face in mock defeat, though the smile tugging at his lips betrayed him. "fine, fine," he said dramatically, shifting forward to rest his elbows on his knees. "i was thinking about you."
your teasing expression faltered, replaced by a mix of surprise and curiosity. "me?"
hoshi nodded, suddenly feeling shy under your gaze. "yeah, you. don't make it weird." he tried to laugh it off, but his voice was softer than usual, giving him away.
you turned fully to face him, sitting up straighter. "what about me?"
he hesitated, his fingers playing with the edge of the popcorn bowl. "just... you. the way you're always making me laugh. the way you light up when you talk about things you love. the way you're you, i guess." his voice trailed off, and for once, he wasn't cracking a joke to deflect.
the room was quiet for a moment, the tv's background noise fading into the distance. when you didn't say anything, hoshi looked down, feeling like he'd just thrown his heart out into the open.
"soonyoung," you said softly, and he dared to glance up. the way you were looking at himâlike he was the only thing in the roomâmade his breath catch.
"yeah?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
you smiled, that soft, genuine smile that always made his chest ache in the best way. "you know, you're not the only one who's been thinking about someone."
his eyes widened, and his mouth opened slightly as if to speak, but no words came out. instead, he just stared at you, waiting for you to say what he was too scared to believe.
"i like you too," you said, your voice shy but steady.
the grin that broke across hoshi's face was immediate, bright and full of relief. "really?" he blurted, leaning forward like he hadn't heard you properly.
you laughed, nodding. "yes, really. why do you look so surprised?"
"because i've been trying to figure out how to tell you for weeks!" he exclaimed, setting the popcorn aside and sliding down to sit on the floor beside you. "do you know how many times i almost said it and chickened out?"
"that sounds like you," you teased, nudging him with your shoulder.
he pouted, but the way his hand brushed against yours betrayed his excitement. "hey, i'm being vulnerable here. don't make fun of me."
you laughed again, your fingers intertwining with his. "alright, alright. no teasing. but for the record, i think you're pretty cute when you're nervous."
hoshi's cheeks turned pink, but he couldn't stop smiling. "you're gonna regret telling me that. i'll never let you live it down."
"i'm counting on it," you said, squeezing his hand.
and just like that, the tension melted away, replaced by the kind of warmth that made everything else feel insignificant. sitting there beside you, hoshi realized that for all the times he'd doubted himself, thisâyouâwas worth it. every single second.
ŕŠâĄË ŕźÂ kisses and cuddles with hoshi
soonyoung is naturally affectionate and playful, his love for physical closeness showing in every little touch. he's the type to make you laugh first before pulling you into a hug, his bright energy making the simplest moments feel full of life. but beneath all the teasing, he's incredibly thoughtfulâhis gestures always carrying a deeper, quieter kind of love.
it's in the way he bumps his shoulder against yours when you're sitting close, or the way his pinky hooks onto yours absentmindedly.he thrives on moments when your laugh echoes in the space between you two, his eyes crinkling with that signature grin as he watches you.
one night, you're both sprawled out on the living room floor, the remnants of a late-night snack scattered around you. you're trying to win an argument about who gets the last slice of pizza, and soonyoung is putting up a good fight, complete with dramatic gestures and exaggerated reasoning.
"fine," you finally concede, laughing as you push the plate toward him. "you win. but only because i'm too tired to argue."
he smirks, victorious, but instead of taking the pizza, he sets it aside and leans over, resting his chin on your shoulder. "you're too cute when you're pretending to be mad," he teases, his voice soft and warm.
you roll your eyes, but the way your cheeks flush doesn't go unnoticed. "you're lucky i like you," you mutter, and he grins wider, his hand brushing against yours as he settles beside you.
ŕŠâĄË ŕźÂ the first kiss soonyoung's first kiss with you is every bit as spontaneous as he is, yet it feels perfect in the moment.
it happens during one of your usual late-night hangouts, walking aimlessly through quiet streets with the glow of streetlights guiding your way. you're both bundled up against the chilly air, sharing random stories and laughing at each other's terrible jokes.
at some point, he stops walking, grabbing your arm lightly to make you pause too. "wait," he says, his tone suddenly more serious. "i just thought of something."
you tilt your head, curious. "what is it?"
he looks at you for a moment, his expression softening. "if i don't do this now, i might chicken out later."
before you can ask what he means, he steps closer, his hand brushing against yours before cupping your cheek gently. there's a flicker of nervousness in his eyes, but it's overshadowed by the way he looks at youâlike you're the only thing in the world that matters.
then he kisses you, his lips warm and soft against yours, the kind of kiss that feels like a question and an answer all at once. it's sweet, unhurried, and undeniably soonyoungâplayful yet full of feeling.
when he pulls back, he's grinning, his cheeks tinged pink. "so... was that okay?" he asks, rubbing the back of his neck.
you laugh, still a little breathless. "yeah, it was okay," you tease, though the smile on your face says much more.
"good," he replies, his grin widening as he takes your hand in his, swinging it slightly as you both continue walking.
ŕŠâĄË ŕźÂ cuddles with hoshi cuddling with soonyoung feels like being wrapped up in sunshine. he's the kind of person who makes every hug feel like a celebration, his energy and warmth impossible to resist.
it starts with him flopping onto the couch beside you, his head landing in your lap as he dramatically sighs about how tired he is. "you've been ignoring me all day," he whines, even if you've only been apart for an hour.
"have not," you counter, laughing as you absentmindedly run your fingers through his hair.
he hums in contentment, his arms wrapping around your waist. "this is all i needed," he murmurs, his voice muffled as he buries his face against your stomach.
on lazy mornings, he's the one to pull you back into bed, his arms tightening around you when you try to get up. "five more minutes," he mumbles, his voice still heavy with sleep. when you give in, he smiles triumphantly, pressing a kiss to your shoulder before settling back against you.
his favorite way to cuddle is when you're both lying on the couch, tangled together under a blanket. he loves resting his head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat as his fingers trace lazy patterns on your arm. every now and then, he'll look up at you with a soft smile, pressing a quick kiss to your chin or your cheek before snuggling closer.
sometimes, when he's feeling especially playful, he'll tickle you just to hear you laugh, only to pull you into a tighter hug afterward, his own laughter mixing with yours. "sorry, i couldn't help it," he says, though his grin tells you he's anything but.
with soonyoung, cuddling is more than just physical closenessâit's an extension of the way he loves. it's in the way he holds you like he's afraid to let go, in the way his presence makes every space feel a little brighter, and in the way he makes sure you always know just how much you mean to him.
â ✠・âŠâ§âË bonus
soonyoung has always been a bundle of energy, his personality larger than life and his affection boundless. but when it comes to the more intimate momentsâthe ones where the world seems to fall away and it's just the two of youâthere's a quiet intensity to him that takes you by surprise every time.
it's late one evening when the two of you find yourselves curled up on the floor of his dance studio. the mirrors around you reflect the faint golden glow of the fairy lights he's strung up, the only illumination in the quiet space. he's lying on his side, his head propped up by his arm as he watches you flip through a playlist on his phone.
"that one," he murmurs, pointing lazily at a random song. but his attention isn't really on the musicâit's on you. the way your face softens when you focus, the slight furrow in your brow that he wants to smooth away with his thumb.
you click on the song, the soft melody filling the studio, and set the phone aside. turning to him, you catch the way he's staring and feel your cheeks warm under his gaze. "what?" you ask, a small laugh escaping.
"you're just... really pretty," he says simply, his tone free of the usual teasing lilt. his honesty makes your heart skip, the sincerity in his eyes leaving you speechless.
you roll your eyes to hide the flutter in your chest. "don't start, hoshi."
"i'm serious," he replies, his voice quieter now. before you can deflect again, he leans in just a little, his hand reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. his fingertips linger for a second too long, the warmth of his touch spreading like fire under your skin.
the air between you shifts, and it's then you realize how close he's gotten. your breath catches as his thumb brushes against your cheek, his gaze dropping to your lips for the briefest moment before meeting your eyes again.
"can i kiss you?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper, as though he's afraid the moment will shatter if he speaks too loudly.
your heart is pounding, and you manage a small nod before he closes the space between you. the first press of his lips is soft, tentativeâalmost shy. it's a side of soonyoung you don't see often, and it makes the kiss all the more meaningful.
but he doesn't stay tentative for long. as soon as he feels you respond, his hand slips to the back of your neck, pulling you closer. the kiss deepens, his lips moving against yours with a quiet urgency, like he's trying to convey everything he feels in this one moment.
his other hand finds your waist, his grip firm but gentle, grounding you as the world spins around you. he kisses you like he's trying to memorize every detailâthe way your lips move against his, the soft hum you make in the back of your throat, the way your fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt.
when he finally pulls back, you're both breathless. his forehead rests against yours, his eyes still closed as he takes a moment to steady himself. "wow," he says softly, his lips curving into a small, almost dazed smile. "you're really good at that."
you laugh, the sound light and a little giddy. "you're not so bad yourself."
but he's not done. before you can say anything else, he's pulling you in for another kiss, this one less careful and more confident. his hand slides up your back, his fingers tangling in your hair as he tilts his head to deepen the kiss. there's a hunger to it now, a raw intensity that makes your knees weak, even though you're already sitting.
and soonyoung? he's completely lost in you. every kiss feels like a dance, his rhythm perfect as he draws you in and leaves you wanting more. his lips trail down to your jaw, his breath warm against your skin as he murmurs your name like it's the only thing that matters.
when he finally pulls away for the second time, he's grinningâhis signature, boyish smile that makes your heart melt. "okay," he says, his voice playful but still tinged with that lingering softness. "now i'm definitely never letting you go."
and you believe him. because in moments like thisâwith the world quiet and his arms around youâit feels like you've found something worth holding onto forever.
âšË. what exactly are you to hoshi?
to hoshi, you're the spark in his worldâthe excitement he didn't know he needed and the calm he secretly craves. you're his muse, his confidant, and the one person who can match his energy without even trying. you're his sunshine on chaotic days, the person who laughs at his jokes (even the terrible ones), and the one he trusts with the parts of himself he doesn't show to everyone.
to him, you're not just specialâyou're irreplaceable.
âšË. how hoshi falls for you
hoshi falls for you like a whirlwindâfast, fun, and a little overwhelming. he doesn't realize it at first because he's too busy enjoying the moments he shares with you, whether it's your teasing banter, your shared adventures, or the way you somehow always manage to make his day better.
he falls for the way you light up a room, your unfiltered honesty, and the way you cheer him onâeven when he's being extra.
for hoshi, it's not just one moment; it's a series of moments that stack up until he can't ignore how much you mean to him anymore. maybe it's the way you dance with him without hesitation, how you match his energy during the most ridiculous moments, or the way you just listen when he opens up about his dreams and fears.
example: it's late one night, and you're both sitting on a rooftop, eating convenience store snacks and laughing over nothing in particular. the city lights stretch out below you, and for a moment, hoshi glances at you as you talk about something random. your eyes shine, your laugh carries through the night, and his heart just stops. that's when it hits him:Â this is my person.
when hoshi confesses, it's going to be bold, a little chaotic, but so him. he might try to plan something elaborateâlike a dance routine or a surprise partyâbut it'll probably go hilariously wrong, and he'll end up blurting it out in the middle of a laugh.
"okay, wait, i can't keep this in anymore!" he'll say, running a hand through his hair as his cheeks turn pink. "i really like you. like, a lot. and i know this might sound crazy, but... will you be my tiger?"
(ă
' Ë )âĄÂ when hoshi loves, it's big, bold, and unrelenting. he loves with his whole heart, making you feel like you're the most important person in his universe. he's the type to hype you up constantlyâwhether it's about how amazing you look, how talented you are, or how lucky he is to have you.
he's always planning little surprises to make you smile, whether it's showing up at your door with your favorite snacks or dragging you out for a spontaneous adventure just because he wants to see you laugh.
he leaves sticky notes in random places for you to find, each one with something sweet or funny: "did you know you're amazing? because you are!" or "you're cuter than a tiger cub. don't fight me on this."
hoshi's love is physical and affectionateâhe's always pulling you into hugs, holding your hand, or squishing your cheeks. he thrives on closeness, always looking for excuses to be near you, whether it's leaning against you during movie night or intertwining his fingers with yours during a quiet moment.
when he kisses you, it's playful at firstâsoft pecks that turn into gigglesâbut when he really leans in, it's deep and meaningful, like he's trying to convey just how much you mean to him without saying a word.
and when you're upset, hoshi is your biggest cheerleader. he'll do everything in his power to make you smile again, even if it means acting like a complete dork just to hear you laugh. but he also knows when to be serious, offering quiet comfort and unwavering support when you need it most.
his love is an endless burst of energy, but it's also steady and grounding, reminding you every day that you're his favorite person in the whole world.
with hoshi, love feels like the perfect mix of adventure and homeâwild, fun, and exactly where you belong.
a/n: i hope you guys enjoyed because i definitely did, myself. i love hoshi so much i think i love him a little too much and he's so cute i will die for him. idk what to say because writing this, i was 3 bottles drunk and i immediately sobered up thinking what hoshi might be. (i proofread this over and over again and honestly, im so proud of finally finishing this). i might make another hoshi fanfic soon. please, mom, i want himmmmm
#svthub#mansaenetwork#svt fanfic#seventeen reactions#svt imagines#hoshi x you#kwon soonyoung#seventeen imagines#seventeen x reader#seventeen#seventeen fluff#seventeen hard hours#svt x you#svt#svt smut#seventeen x you#seventeen x y/n#seventeen hoshi#hoshi x reader#seventeen smut#svt x reader#seventeen hard thoughts#svt reactions#svt x y/n#âę¤ŕŹâŕšâđ
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âĄđ ࣪ Ö´ÖśÖ¸âž.#seventeen fic#hoshi drabbles
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I know this prompt is supposed to be cute and sweet, but I'm in some sort of mood so đ¤ˇđ˝ââď¸
Thanks @dereles for the writing inspo đ¤
Derek waited behind the tree line, watching the Beacon Hills Lacrosse team jog across the field. He took a deep breath, knowing that Stiles would be walking out, showered and smiling, in just under 17 minutes. He checked his watch and strained his ears to listen for the boy's heartbeat, still fast from the cardio of practice. He could make out the distinct cadence of his cleats against the cement of the locker room before they clattered to the ground when he began undressing. Derek shook his head and turned away, feeling a tingle of shame at his intrusive eavesdropping.
Sill, he couldn't help but perk up every time he heard Syiles'voice ring out, loud and clear against the backdrop of post-practice chatter. He talked about Lydia, and his new strategy to win her over, in quiet whispers to Scott in order to avoid Jackson's ire. Derek reminded himself that the boy was not his, couldn't be his--not yet, at least. As much as he tried to be worthy, his words always seemed to come out as angry, demanding, and full of spite. He worried every day that if Lydia realized how amazingly loyal, smart, and kind the boy was, she would steal him away. Thank god she cared so much about surface level appeal.
The minutes ticked by as Derek waited for Stiles to leave. He was desperate to see the wide smile that his well-placed gift would bring. Stiles always spared a glance at the free book bin near the school entrance whenever he passed, and Derek had left a small paperback he knew Stiles wouldn't be able to resist. 101 Dog Jokes. When Derek saw it on the discount rack at the drugstore, he immediately thought of Stiles. Flipping through the pages, the jokes were quite possibly the worst he had ever seen. But the sound of Stiles cackling with laughter at Derek's deadpan reception was too tempting to pass up.
Fifteen minutes had already passed, and Derek was getting more eager by the second. That's when he heard it--Stiles' heartbeat kick up a notch. It was Jackson, spouting something or other about staying away from Lydia. Derek heard the scuffle clear as day. The bang of bodies hitting old lockers, the slap of knuckles meeting a fleshy cheek, the rustle of equipment falling to the ground.
Derek felt his eyes shift blue and his claws extend into the bark of the tree he was gripping. He wanted to rush in and protect Stiles, put the fear of god into Jackson, and save the day. But also knew that it wasn't his place. This was something Stiles would have to work out for himself, as much as it pained the wolf to see him get hurt. The boy may not be strong enough to win a fistfight, but Derek knew he was strong enough to keep his chin up afterwards.
When the fight finally died down, Derek heard a few sniffles before the sound of Stiles' heartbeat returned to normal. The wolf tracked his movement out of the locker room, through the maze of halls in the school, and out the front entrance. He walked slower than usual, favoring his right leg ever so slightly. When he emerged through the large double doors, Derek saw that his left eye was in the early stages of bruising, and his face was set in a quiet frown. Scott was nowhere to be seen, since he probably ditched his so-called friend to spend time with the Argent girl. Derek's loyalty to Stiles was the only thing keeping him from tearing Scott a new one. If he can stay on good terms with Scott, then he can stay close to Stiles. Nothing else really mattered.
Finally, Stiles walked past the book bin. He cast a fleeting glance to the pile, but didn't seem interested in stopping to look. Derek deflated. But then Stiles stopped a few steps away, brow furrowed. He turned to give the book bin another look, as if he saw something interesting and his brain had taken a few extra seconds to process it.
When he immediately picked up the book of dog jokes, Derek's heart soared. Stiles' face softened, and a muscle twitched at the corner of his mouth in amusement. He thumbed through the book as he continued walking to his jeep, nearly falling after running into the guard rail on the stairs down. Derek finally felt his shoulders relax as he sighed in relief. He looked forward to being the victim of whatever horrible joke Stiles would surprise him with.
Later that night, Derek checked his phone and saw that he had a few new texts from Stiles.
Stiles: what do you call a wolf that meditates?
Stiles: aware wolf
Stiles: ha!
Derek couldn't hide the grin that took over his face.
Not enough fics where giving gifts is Derekâs love language. that man is emotionally constipated as hell and also part animal you know once he realized he was falling for stiles heâd be thinking of him every time he sees Star Wars merch at the mall or a jacket that would sit perfectly on his lanky frame. That book of dog jokes Stiles cackles over every time he reads a joke out to Scott or Derek? Definitely not strategically placed at the top of a âfree booksâ box outside the school just before lacrosse practice let out. Definitely not.
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