#and all this 'save to win win to save' shit i'm just supposed to accept that all of that was for literally nothing???

[aria-allium]

i really don't want to come across like those people who vehemently denied the ending of bbc sherlock when it dropped but like. there's no way that actual slop of an extra chapter is real bc if it is idk man

[takeiteasyonmeimstilllearning]

hot take on a real life Jigen

I know that Monkey punch modeled Jigen on James Coburn, but hear me out. Robert Mitchum is Jigens spirit animal.

1stly, voice. They have the same timber. (Idk what else to call it) I would definitely say epcar and Mitchum are in the same category. Kobayashi is similar too but he is more animated, going into falsetto and such. I also think if jigen sang he would be baritone and talk-sing his way through lyrics.

2ndly, Mitchum's grumpy old man vibe just radiate Jigen imo.

Mitchum quotes:

They got so they wanted me to take some of my clothes off in the pictures. I objected to this, so I put on some weight and looked like a Bulgarian wrestler when I took my shirt off.

The only difference between me and my fellow actors is that I've spent more time in jail.

I gave up being serious about making pictures around the time I made a film with Greer Garson and she took a hundred and twenty-five takes to say no.

[on his acting talents] Listen. I got three expressions: looking left, looking right and looking straight ahead.

People think I have an interesting walk. Hell, I'm just trying to hold my gut in.

When I drop dead and they rush to the drawer, there's going to be nothing in it but a note saying 'later'.

I never take any notice of reviews - unless a critic has thought up some new way of describing me. That old one about my lizard eyes and anteater nose and the way I sleep my way through pictures is so hackneyed now.

Years ago, I saved up a million dollars from acting, a lot of money in those days, and I spent it all on a horse farm in Tucson. Now when I go down there, I look at that place and I realize my whole acting career adds up to a million dollars worth of horse shit.

I never changed anything, except my socks and my underwear. And I never did anything to glorify myself or improve my lot. I took what came and did the best I could with it.

[asked what jail was like] It's like Palm Springs without the riff-raff.

John Wayne had four-inch lifts in his shoes. He had the overheads on his boat accommodated to fit him. He had a special roof put in his station wagon. The son-of-a-bitch, they probably buried him in his goddamn lifts.

There just isn't any pleasing some people. The trick is to stop trying.

Sure I was glad to see John Wayne win the Oscar. I'm always glad to see the fat lady win the Cadillac on television, too.

I kept the same suit for six years - and the same dialog. We just changed the title of the picture and the leading lady.

[asked why he took on an 18-hour mini-series] It promised a year of free lunches.

How do I keep fit? I lay down a lot.

[1969] How the hell did I get into this picture anyway? I kept reading in the papers that I was going to do it, but when they sent me the script I just tossed it on the heap with the rest of them. But somehow, one Monday morning, here I was. How the hell do these things happen to a man?

[1948] I'm a natural hermit. I've been in constant motion of escape all my life. I never really found the right corner to hide in.

[1968] The Rin Tin Tin method is good enough for me. That dog never worried about motivation or concepts and all that junk.

[on working with Faye Dunaway] When I got here I walked in thinking I was a star and then I found I was supposed to do everything the way she says. Listen, I'm not going to take any temperamental whims from anyone, I just take a long walk and cool off. If I didn't do that, I know I'd wind up dumping her on her derrière.

[asked what he looks for in a script before accepting a job] Days off.

[on Jane Russell] Miss Russell was a very strong character. Very good-humored when she wasn't being cranky.

They think I don't know my lines. That's not true. I'm just too drunk to say 'em.

Look me dead in the eye and Tell me this isn't jigen

[lemonhemlock]

so, i'm going through your anti team black tag and living my best life, but one post in particular that you made got me thinking.

“george made damn sure rhaenyra’s bloodline sat on the throne at the end bc, if the hightowers won, house targaryen would have been reformed, and he couldn’t kill them all off at the end of the main series”

i'm pretty sure this might've just been a joke, but it makes me curious. do you think something like a targaryen reformation would be possible, hypothetically speaking? i certainly wouldn't mind it in a "greens win" AU scenario, but that's just me. i wanna know if anyone else sees potential in this. 💚💚💚

Hello, yes, this was mostly a joke, as it happens. 😅 (anon is referring to this post) To introduce another lengthy parenthesis, I remember at the time that some of the reactions to that post were in the range for "why doesn't anyone understand that the Hightowers are also feudal lords vying for their own interests and not some great reformists out to save Westeros", which... Listen. 😄 To put equitably, this fandom has a considerable issue with knowing when to level criticism and when to just treat banter as lighthearted horsing around and not take it too seriously. Something which even I'm not exempt from, I don't think. 🤷‍♀️

So, in the interest of making a meme, that post was kind of half-true in that it simplified a more nuanced concept (that was never an avenue that the author decided to explore anyway) for the sake of humour. I have, in the past, detailed my thoughts on House Hightower and what I think is their role in the wider narrative. This is based on the information we have on them presently. If I'm wrong, then I'm wrong. Who knows, maybe Lord Leyton and Melara plan on blowing Oldtown up for shits and giggles. We don't have to guess everything correctly - another aspect this community struggles with in their fandom wars and obsession with having the most correct, morally pure take.

Regardless, yes, the Hightowers obviously are a privileged family at the top of the social food chain, benefitting from the exploitation awarded by feudalism - a political-economic system based on vast inequality. Therefore, any type of reform they might be willing to undertake will be limited and not really something that significantly changes the status-quo. Just like the beloved, fan-favourite, and mostly confirmed "winners" - the Starks. A third element that our fandom has trouble accepting is the concept of incremental change. I feel like it would basically be a truism to point out that incremental change has been the most reliable vector of socio-economic evolution throughout human history. So, bad news for them, I suppose, but any superficial study of history will reveal that feudalism hardly collapsed overnight. Which leads us back to the idea that any small change, no matter how limited, does matter in the long run, because, as time passes, it will be compounded with another small change and so on.

Anyway, coming back to the question. Would Targaryen reformation be possible? Certainly! GRRM could have made up any story he wanted. Anything is possible if you plan for it and it makes sense within your worldbuilding. As it stands, the Targaryens are foreigners with a questionable culture, hailing from a land that used to engage in practices that even the feudal Westerosi found backwards, distasteful, barbaric or immoral: slavery, human sacrifice, incest, great feats of violence such as pillaging and conquering neighbouring lands for the sake of feeding their population to their volcano gods etc. The Targaryens also have fire-breathing monsters that, while not exactly enough all the time to prevent any rebellions from happening, are weapons that no one else has access to and that can cause a great deal of damage that no one else can replicate.

So, in order to "reform" and integrate, they would need to renounce all that. They would need to do it the traditional way. They do some of the work, but never go all the way. They accept the main religion of the land, but they don't let go of inter-marrying, because they don't want to lose their access to dragons. There are attempts to integrate, but, by the time of the events of the main series, they have returned to incest. Funnily enough, Aegon V plays a role in both - he marries outside of the family and has no dragons left, but his succeeding son and daughter marry each other and, eventually, Aegon decides that bringing back dragons is not such a bad idea after all. I do think that the symbolic weight of Daenerys having both her parents and her grandparents as brother-sister sets is laying the "dragon blood" metaphor thick - and that it holds more magical weight than any mathematical calculation of her actual watered-down Targaryen DNA.

In any such scenario where GRRM decided to go down a Targaryen reformation path, IMO it would have been thematically-relevant to ease into it via a marriage alliance with one of the oldest families in Westeros - a well-respected, rich house that also has close links to both the only centre of higher education and the main religious organization in the land. Hence the meme. :) But it doesn't last and the Targaryens go back to their dastardly ways eventually, that's the point of them in the story, because the author chose it to be the point.

[chaosteddybear]

How about Eros 1 & 4, Philia 1, 3 & 5, Storge 1 & 3 for Mix? 👀

WOW THANK YOU!!!! ❤️ Answering these all for Mix <3 <3

Eros 1: Is your OC romantic in the traditional sense? Do they enjoy giving or receiving gifts of flowers or confectionary? Or are there other courtship traditions from their culture of origin that are important to them?

Gods, yes. Mix is hyper romantic I think. Romantic++

He is always thinking of his love and wants to take care of them. Some "romantic" things he does for anyone in his pack but the true romance is saved for his love - he's very monogamous. So he may bring gifts back for everyone after a trip, but the one for his love will be much more extravagant and more thoughtful than the rest. There will be more of them as well.

He loves to write his feelings down in letters, and he loves to do things like stick up for them, serve them, all of that!

To be done romantic things FOR would drive him absolutely crazy. Why? Why would they do this! He would be bawling probably every time.

Eros 4: Do they believe in love at first sight? Have they ever developed a crush or romantic (or erotic) fixation upon a stranger based on their appearance alone?

TLDR not based on aesthetics but based on actions he does in a way! Answered here

Philia 1: Does your OC have a Best Friend? If they do then how long have they known each other and how did they meet? If they don't then do they have a close group of friends they love equally? Or are they more of a loner?

I think Sasli, Turgi, and Rowley are his best friends. First he met Turgi - she pulled him out of his Rambling Era by suggesting that he make a new family 😭 He needs her still for a while, and he loves her too (as a friend). They're inseparable and she does a lot of calling him on his shit...

Sasli... he will always be her most reliable and loving friend. Sure he wanted more. But he accepted early that he wouldn't get it, and why would that get in the way of still loving her in platonic ways? He and Turgi met Sasli together and brought her into the pack 🥺 so he knows her the most medium amount of the bunch, I suppose.

Rowley, well, this one is more interesting!!! Sasli is in love with Rowley, which I won't explain here, but that's how Mix meets him! Well. He is so skeptical at first. Honestly, a little jealous. But. He wants the best for Sasli, so he only gives real criticisms and only to his face, to see his reactions. The snark is pretty adorable, actually. Rowley (almost) always wins, putting Mix in his place. After a while, he warms up to Rowley a lot. And not only does he prove he is worthy of Sasli, but he also proves he is worthy for even more. Yea, Mix would kill for him. (tag @dmagedgoods for Rowley <3)

Philia 3: What qualities does your OC most value in a friend? Loyalty? Shared sense of humour? Or something else?

Value? In a friend? How about just existing? They don't owe him anything! How could they? What does he even deserve?

Haha, but really. I think for him the most important thing is loving the people he already loves. Or at least respecting them? Making them happy and not killing them? That would be enough, in some cases. Because his pack is fully under his protection, anybody who threatens them in any way will not make it through his front door!

Philia 5: What is their most fervent wish for their best friend(s)? How far would they go to make it happen?

This is such a tough question for Mix because who is he to decide what they do and don't get!

I suppose safety. His most selfish desire is for his friends to be safe and without harm. And yes, he will use all of his skills to ensure this happens. Maybe a bit trigger happy if I'm being honest.... He would go as far as needed. He would kill to keep his pack members safe.

Storge 1: Did your OC's parents love them unconditionally? If so then has this helped them feel confident as an adult? If not then how has this affected them? What were the conditions their family attached to their relationship?

Mix was lucky. His family loved him absolutely and unconditionally.

It .. Fuck, it DID give him confidence. Too much, really! He feels he really let them down, and it's made worse because they thought the world of him. That bittersweet line between "I'm a failure" and "I'm only a failure because I WASN'T THERE." He really feels like he let them down and he will probably never get over it.

However, they did give him maybe more freedom than a kid should have. So that's important to who he is too 😂 his little solo trips smh.

Storge 3: How far does parental approval (imagined or expressed) impact upon their current sense of self-worth? What might they sacrifice or attempt to achieve in order to ensure the approval of their parents?

Not at all to be honest. He really defines his self-worth on his own, but he sure is harsh about it..

The ask post

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Had a dream last night that Josh Widdicombe became the first person ever to win the Perrier Award twice. I watched him accept the award at a livestreamed ceremony, and then my phone rang, and I looked at the caller ID, and it said Ray Peacock. I answered it, and it was Ian Boldsworth, calling to complain about how Josh Widdicombe is a shit comedian who doesn't deserve that award.

Things about my dream that are unrealistic:

- There's a rule that says you can only win the Perrier Award once.

- Josh Widdicombe has not won a Perrier Award in previous years, so even if he won it this year and they started allowing multiple winners, he wouldn't be winning his second.

- I might be wrong about this, but I'm pretty sure there's some maximum level of fame and if you go past that you can't win that award anymore. I'm not sure what that level is but Josh Widdicombe must have passed it years ago. He's also not performing in Edinburgh this year, and I assume hasn't performed there in years, due to aforementioned level of fame.

- I've only remembered while writing this that it's not actually called the Perrier Award anymore and hasn't been for about 20 years. But my most detailed knowledge of Edinburgh Festival comedy history comes from when it was called the Perrier Award. Also comedians definitely kept referring to it by that name long after it was changed, I hear them call it that and it stays that way in my head too. But in my dream the livestream called it the Perrier Award, and they definitely don't call it that at the real-life award ceremonies in 2024.

- Pretty sure the (non-)Perrier Award ceremonies aren't livestreamed. Though I have seen a few videos filmed at previous ones.

- Josh Widdicombe's stand-up is not good enough to win a (non-)Perrier Award. (I like the guy, I really do, I think he's great fun on podcasts and panel shows and there are some posts on this blog from about three years ago when I was watching The Last Leg that contain an embarrassing amount of me going on about how much I like Josh Widdicombe - I'm glad that era of my posts is now well buried in the depths of Tumblr history - but I've seen all 3 of his stand-up specials and heard some of his more recent stuff and none of it's great.)

- It isn't the end of August right now.

- Ian Boldsworth doesn't have my phone number. And he is not saved in my phone contacts under the name Ray Peacock.

Things about my dream that realistic:

- If Josh Widdicombe did win a Perrier Award, Ian Boldsworth would probably call somebody up to talk shit about that. It wouldn't be me, but you'd think he'd call someone. Unless he has changed drastically between 2011 and 2024. Which I suppose he might have done, he wouldn't be the only one from his old podcast to do that.

Anyway, I've had various dreams featuring Britcom before, but usually just with comedians appearing in the background of some other vague dream scenario - this has to be the most weirdly specific/niche one. I think when the Perrier Awards start turning up in your dreams, it means you definitely have the credentials to be allowed to fly across an ocean and watch the Edinburgh Festival.

[aeondeug]

Something Fear and Hunger has had me thinking about is the concept of fairness. Fairness and difficulty tend to go hand in hand. Dark Souls is heavily praised for being fair, for example. And when difficult games are criticized, one of the common things to come up is that the game isn't being fair. That it's bullshit.

I've seen Fear and Hunger be deemed "unfair" and I do think that's a fair assessment. To a degree. In regards to the coin flips there is, always, a degree of unfairness there. You will never have enough coins to deal with all the coin flips. And even then those will never guarantee you succeed. They just make success more likely. And you are always subject to the whims of rng where loot is concerned.

I feel like one might point out that there's things like the enemies and their one hit kill attacks. Or things like the traps. I'm not entirely sure I'd call these unfair. I do think you end up eating so much shit in the beginning that it feels that way. But this shit eating is, I think, a teaching tool. And I do think that it is, overall, generally effective.

The floorboard with the nail in it stands out in this regard. It has a fairly minor consequence. You just get bleed in an area replete with cloth. The significance of the floorboard isn't to waste your resources, though it certainly can if you spend an hour accidentally stepping on it. The significance of that floorboard is to teach you, in a relatively gentle fashion, that you need to pay attention to your surroundings. The arrow trap you can stick your arm into is similar. It teaches you that interacting with things won't necessarily be safe. That you do need to think about just interacting with things. Not that you shouldn't interact, as the boxes and bookshelves are teaching you that you should interact. But that you need to weigh your decisions. That risk needs to be considered.

I think this may also be why the Human Hydra is located so close to a bed, at least in the layouts of that room I've received. It happens early enough in that you are taught that interacting might not be great. But, more importantly, it teaches you that you can reload saves. And the willingness to abuse yourself and throw yourself into situations that you know likely will go poorly is an important lesson. Because the game's difficulty largely relies upon lack of knowledge.

And once you have knowledge it starts to feel less bullshit, at least in my experience. Granted, some of that knowledge is gained via trial and error. I've only survived the prison guard's mad rush attack once. Just a single time. But again I think that's what things like the Human Hydra are for. To teach you that you're not really just playing one save continuously. But that you are more...working with divergent streams of time, I suppose? With loops of time. Carefulness goes a long way and you do need to be cautious, I feel. But I think that one of the big things I've learned which has helped me is that I shouldn't really think of my characters are like The Run. That I should be willing to treat them like a stolen car. Because if I do that and accept the losses, I can get at what I actually need to win. And what I actually need to win isn't getting lucky on a coin flip. It's knowing things.

And that I think is what I find most addicting about how its difficulty works. That I am being presented with such a hostile and unfair seeming thing and that I need to figure out how to make it "fair". Or hell why just make it fair? Why not make it unfair for the enemies? Fuck being fair.

[vvatchword]

So about a week ago i managed to enrage somebody about BioShock Infinite. Now, this was fair, seeing as i approached the subject in a smarmy way, but what struck me immediately was the performative fear of the person i angered, and how my own performative fear was woken. I started double-checking myself, asking myself if i hadn't asked enough difficult questions of the source material and so on, and in the process, I started getting flashbacks to early Tumblr.

Which is why I wanna talk shit about what makes well-meaning people get so fucking uptight about difficult elements in fiction (involving race, gender, sexuality, who gives a fuck).

Hint: it's because they're wildly terrified of being -ist/-phobic themselves. There's no easy way to signify lack of prejudice to others so it must be broadcast. Coincidentally, when I was a Christian fundamentalist, i noticed from an early age that we felt we had to be morally performative, since there's no easy way to signify you're "right with God." If there are no outward signs, how are you supposed to know what's good or bad?

Haha there's no fucking way at all because there are rarely people or organizations or media that fall fully on one side or the other. And that includes you and me and everybody on Earth.

You will fuck up. You will accidentally be racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, classist, nationalist. You will discover that what you thought was a harmless belief actually comes packaged with baggage of the nastiest vein. You will discover that no viewpoint is without sin (no, not one).

At some level, you've got to be gracious to yourself--and to others. You've got to understand what makes people shitty. You've got to look your own sins straight in the face, even as they burn you.

Performative morality will not save you.

Performative morality will not absolve you of your sins.

Performative morality is the doorway to puritanism.

Puritans are far more hung up about looking good than they are about doing good. They believe in a black-and-white world. If the answer isn't easy, 1/0, T/F, Y/N, they won't entertain it. They don't love people; they love being right. They don't discuss to learn, they fight to win. In the absence of devils, they'll invent them. They desperately need to fight because how else can you prove you're on the right side? It's so difficult to live a life of maintenance, it's so slow and unsexy and unclear, it hurts so much, it's awful discovering ways in which you have been the monster, but if you don't acknowledge your inherent monstrous capabilities, you will end up committing them. Attempting to force your environment into moral acceptability will do nothing but hurt other people--and people are the only things that matter.

There's a fear of vulnerability in Puritanism--the terror of admitting you don't have it all together, that you might never have it all together. You know the Puritans will not hesitate to destroy you in the same way that they have destroyed countless others; you long to belong; you long to do the right things in the right ways. But Puritans will save no one. Only vulnerability is what produces real change and real love.

I'm sorry it can't be easy. I'm sorry the answers are complicated, multifaceted, and endless. I'm sorry it's not easy to make snap judgements. But they aren't going to start being so just because you insist.

Welcome to the fucked-up universe. Leave your false dichotomies at the Sunday-School door.

[sedgewicke]

“It’s not a big deal. Dalinar Kholin is friends with one of the worst murderers I’ve ever met. So? Dalinar is lighteyed. He’s probably friends with a lot of murderers.”

Oh, honey. Let me fix that for you.

Why do I have the feeling that this reveal isn't going to be as big a deal as it absolutely should be? Because I know from the grapevine that at the very least Adolin gives a fuck that Dalinar killed his mom and he had to learn about it from his tell-all book. But I haven't heard anything about Kaladin's reaction, and that worries me.

I think I will bet money that it will come down to

But he's changed/he's trying/he feels bad.

and/or

But I know he's a good man with a good heart.

As that seems to be the version of bs.exe that Dalinar's OS runs. Which is some motherfucking Protagonist Privilege, I'll tell you what. Normal villains trying to do the Redemption Arc Run would kill for cheat codes like that, but they can't, because it would set them back too many points.

And wtf is this Dalinar stan shit Syl is pulling? Is that you, Brandon, or does she have a reason to be like this about Dalinar? Even if she does, I'm still calling it bigtime Character Shilling. I mean, I kinda figured that Dalinar would win Kaladin over way, way, way too easily, to the point where I included it in my WoR drinking '''game''', but I didn't expect to be yelling at Tinkerbell over here for trying to force it.

“Dalinar’s not like Amaram,” Syl said. “You know he’s not.”

Syl zipped out into the air in front of Kaladin, coming down like a storm. Literally like a storm. She stopped in the air right in front of him, a cloud boiling from beneath her feet, flashing with lightning. “You can honestly say,” she demanded, “that you think Dalinar Kholin is only pretending to be honorable?”

“No, Dalinar gave up his Blade for us. He’s a good man. I accept that. Amaram has him fooled. He had me fooled too, so I suppose I can’t blame Kholin too much.”

Actually, you super can! There is no excuse for how gullible Dalinar is (No, I will never get over being dragged though that "Does Sades is trustworthy?" plotline, only for the answer to be "No, just like you immediately guessed.") at his age, with as many people around him who should be able to fill in that glaring blindspot. Also? Dude did the bare minimum for the guys who saved his and his son's lives (and also, you know, thousands of other people), so he's gets instant Good Man status, no questions asked or allowed?

And why do I also have the feeling that, if Kaladin gets pissed at any of the shit that I'm told Dalinar will be pulling on him, he's going to be framed as the bad guy?

[chiefbeifongcanrailme]

Lin and Hiroshi Sato, jail cell.

A clever prompt, Orange! I loved the challenge.

Accepting prompts- shoot your shot!

"Asami needs you." Her voice rang from across metal bars.

Over the years, Sato had learned that Lin always came a massive wall of metal. No matter literal or figurative, there was always a fortification.

And now, here she was in front of yet another metal divide between them. On the pretext of his daughter no less.

His life was a wad of gemsbok bull shit.

"Hiroshi." Her voice didn't echo this time.

So he turned away from the back wall to find her standing right in front of him.

"I'm of no use to her, Chief." He replied, his tone stoic and mournful, "Let her know that there's nothing I can do-"

Lin groaned, "Stop wallowing in that self-loathing. I don't have time to explain, but your daughter is working with Varrick to save the city from burning into ruins. We need your help. Asami needs your help."

A foreign sense of sincerity masked the Chief's face. But Hiroshi found himself doubling down.

"She's more than capable to do it herself!"

Lin exhaled. With a flick of her wrist, the cell door opened. She reservedly made her way inside, leaving the door open behind her. She looked patently uneasy being on this side of her metal wall, but she powered through and sat on the bench beside him.

"You have made a few mistakes." She began somberly, "Heck, we've all made a few mistakes."

"Some bigger than others."

"And she forgave you, Hiroshi." Lin placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, "She wants a relationship with you."

Sato shook his head.

"But I ruined it," He exhaled petulantly, "I don't deserve it."

"You know," Lin straightened up in her seat, "If you don't forgive yourself, you're not going to be able to accept another person's forgiveness."

"Lin," He rested back, "How am I supposed to live with myself after everything I've done?" His voice was laced with painful humor.

Catching his humor, she let out a snort, "If only I knew. I could refer you to people who forgave themselves well before I could ever heal from their actions."

He turned to his side to face her, "I heard of your reconciliation with Suyin."

"Oh, there's more," She snickered awkwardly, still facing the metal bars, "I believe I'm on good terms with my mother too."

Sato chuckled, "Chief Beifong has reunited with Chief Beifong? How'd we get there?"

She shrugged, sighing softly, "I realized that there just isn't enough to time to hold on to things that stung in the past. You have to suck the poison out yourself and move on because no one's going to sit around waiting for you."

Hiroshi ran his arm around her shoulder and nudged her into his embrace gently. She didn't flinch. Instead, she leaned in and rested her head against his shoulder.

"And that was enough to forgive them?"

Lin hummed in affirmation, "And I'd suggest forgiving yourself too. I may have lost years at having a family, but you don't have to."

As he nodded in response, she moved off his shoulder and turned towards him. She gave him a tight smile before signaling towards the open door.

Sato brushed his hand along bench until it met hers. He softly ensconced her knuckles under his palm and squeezed, "You know I waited for you, right?"

"I know." She whispered, "But I made the wrong choice."

"Well, I forgive you." He quipped, "So forgive yourself too. I'll wait."

She shook her head with nonchalance, studying the candor on his face and stifling her own grin.

With his other hand, Hiroshi cupped her jaw lightly and brought her face closer to his. His eyes fell shut, but Lin stopped him, placing one slender finger on his lips.

"After we win this battle." She whispered against his mouth.

Hiroshi's face softened.

Afterwards.

[pumpkin-pi-e]

Pairing: Erasermic/reader

Reader Gender: Female

Citrus scale: Orange?

Content Warnings: None! :3

*cough* probably crackhead energy.

Synopsis: Erasermic fluff + shin-son! A collection of three lighthearted drabbles, I suppose. Honestly, I'm not sure what to call them. I'll provide snippets from each down below!

1st: Bully!zawa (homeless cat man) picks on the local hero and beloved radio host, ‘Present Mic.’

“Songbird, Shou’s bein’ mean.” That pout never failed to melt your heart—that cockatoo’s cruisin’ for a smoochin’.

“C’mere, sweetie.” Shouta pretends not to be jealous as you give his husband that tender lovin’—generously warm lips and deep nuzzles that look painfully inviting. He can't help but envy.

“Prince,” Shouta's ears are immediately red, and he stiffens as you address him.

“That wasn't very nice of you, my love.”

─────────────────────

2nd: You, Shinsou, and Hizashi do a little science experiment! (The three of you conspire on how to achieve that gravity-defying hairdo.)

“Let me get this straight.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, massaging the thin layer of skin to soothe an oncoming migraine. “You want me to activate Erasure, knowing it'll exacerbate my dry eye for a science experiment?”

You three share a look and answer in unison. “Yes.”

He sighs. “Fine. Let's get this over with.”

─────────────────────

3rd: A homeless resident is trying to enjoy his rare day off and is highly against the cardinal sin of putting buns in ovens.

“Shouta.”

“Mm?”

“Babies are cute.”

Shouta eyes you skeptically, unsure where this is going and wary of finding out.

─────────────────────

A/N: lol, I'm just here to goof around and have fun. These are some shenanigans I wrote in between stories I'm working on. Hopefully, you can get a chuckle out of them.

Aizawa bundles up in his Snuggie™️ after work hours and sets you in his lap so you can help him win levels in Candy Crush (and because it's prime cuddle real estate)

Interestingly, Aizawa has a plethora of stored in-game boosts that he never uses. He doesn't allow you to use them either. The hero isn't saving them for burdensome levels; on the contrary. Aizawa mentioned he didn't want any handicaps. Shouta thought it didn't count if he didn't win on his own. He neither wants nor needs the game to hold his hand.

You know, unlike Hizashi, who runs through power-ups like they’re candy.

Shouta likes it because it's both relaxing and stimulating. On the flip side, you enjoy it because you get to see him in those cute bifocals he wears whenever he has his tablet in hand. (heh. Such a dad.)

To your absolute joy, you discovered both heroes wore them in their downtime. And, on the odd occasion where a student's paper was so flagrantly horrid, it gave them literal cataracts. The teachers would be forced to put them on to see that shit clearer, and it was still the most offensive thing they had ever seen.

Laughter could not be con ta in ed when Mic claimed that a singular piece of paper simultaneously spit in his face, gave him acne, pissed in his Cheerios, and insulted his mustache in the breadth of one sentence.

And when you (foolishly) thought the pain in your chest couldn't get any worse, you were mercilessly thrown into hysterics when Aizawa piped up from his sleeping bag, surrounded by his nest of junk food: jelly pouches, hot chip, macarons, and every other sweet he could get his grubby little mittens on without the DJ chastising him. “Truth hurts. It isn't an insult if it's accurate. Maybe you'll take the hint and finally shave it off. Accept your fate as a babyface.”

Mic sputtered, offended by this latest insult to his darling, totally-hip-and-not-all-lame mustache, and from his husband of all people! “Babe! That's hurtful!”

Shouta didn't look away from his tablet and the cute kitties it depicted, but he was snickering under the collar of his sweater.

“Songbird, Shou’s bein’ mean.” That pout never failed to melt your heart—that cockatoo’s cruisin’ for a smoochin’.

“You think your man looks handsome, don't you?”

Poor baby. Sweet summer child. “Of course I do, cutietoo.” How could you not? He's too sweet in those red-rimmed frames and soft pastels. That gold hair is a halo accentuating his round cheeks, drawing attention to the adorable gap between his two front teeth.

Zashi hums sadly into your kiss, melting into your hands as you cup his face. “Need kisses. I'm heartbroken, mama.”

“C’mere, sweetie.” Shouta pretends not to be jealous as you give his husband that tender lovin’--generously warm lips and deep nuzzles that look painfully inviting. He can't help but envy.

To make matters worse, you cradle Zashi in your soft bosom. Shouta swears it looks like pillowy heaven, and the DJ is suddenly smug as he shoots him a look that the erasure hero scoffs at.

Suck up.

Fuckin’ teacher’s pet.

“Prince,” Shouta's ears are immediately red, and he stiffens as you address him.

“That wasn't very nice of you, my love.” He blooms like a rose, albeit one with more than a few thorns, as he grumbles at the pet name. He pouts heavily and hunkers into his sleeping bag.

“My love?”

He turns over, grabbing his snacks as he does. Don't speak to him or his children ever again. He won't stand for this blatant favoritism.

“Sweetest sleep prince?”

More flustered grumbling.

(The sound of velcro zipping.)

“My hero? Handsome tomcat?”

The zipper drops, and Aizawa is startled by the two faces grinning at him. His magic hair levitated from fright.

“...What do you-mm!” Those eyes are wide and red when two pairs of lips smooch his grumpy face, and all too quickly does it dissolve in gentle, husky giggles and the smallest of smiles.

...Fine. He'll forgive you this time.

He’s peppered in kisses and compliments. No inch of him is left unloved. Similarly, no place is safe from the cluster of kisses--not his warm cheeks, his forehead that had to be revealed by sweeping his bangs aside, and certainly not his rosy nose.

“Handsome kitty.”

*kiss*

“Cute caterpillar.”

*kiss*

“Sweet valentine.”

*kiss*

“Extra special squeeze. My VIP baby!”

“Sleepy beauty.”

“Shouta beau.”

“Sweet listener.”

“Jelly Belly.”

Zashi pauses his ticklish assault, and Shouta breathes a sigh of relief--he was this close to losing his shit.

The radio personality repeats your strange endearment, “Jelly Belly?”

You pat Shouta’s belly in response, eliciting a groaned protest from said sleep-deprived dilf. “This bad boy can fit so many jelly pouches!”

Mic shrugs; it's good enough for him.

“It can fit so many [name’s].”

Le gasp! You stare at Shouta in mock horror, drawing back.

“You can't eat me, you fiend!”

Shouta, the aforementioned fiend, merely huffed.

He might be hairy, but he's no wolf, and you don't own a house made of straw.

Shinsou takes this most innoptune moment to walk into the living room and promptly spins on his heels.

Parents being weirdos? Yeah, hard pass.

“Um, songbird? I'm sure he already has...”

“I mean... technically.” Mic supplied.

“Shouta, you indecent kitty.” You narrow your eyes--judgemental.

And here you thought he was a sweet angel. He's more like a sin-ammon roll.

“Shouta, there are children around.” Zashi, admonished.

“He’s hardly a child,” The hero scoffs. “And I didn't mean it that way.”

“Sure you didn't.”

Aizawa cut his field of vision to match his husband's narrowed gaze.

“Pervy!zawa.”

Shouta inhales. “Hizashi, I am this close.”

“Ew! TMI, babe. Think of songbird.”

...

Shouta lunges.

A whole fiasco ensues where you had to pull the heroes away from each other, putting an end to their playful wrestling. The kissing marathon resumed somewhere in that mess of testosterone and sweaty bodies.

It turns out his swatting was half-hearted. Shouta commands you both to keep going after you stop. “No...keep going.”

Anyhow, back to the glasses™️.

You reacted like any other rational adult the first time you saw them in glasses. Meaning, you only turned into a complete sap and waxed poetic about how angelic they were for a minimum of thirty minutes. Anything more would have been excessive.

Both pros are (endlessly) entertained by how quickly you simp over them. Hizashi, that clever cockatoo, discovered it's a sure-fire method to bag himself a couple of kisses.

[Enter a cranky Aizawa walking in on his three idiots rubbing balloons on the carpet to give themselves static cling for whatever godforsaken reason. Grouchy from insomnia, he would’ve pulled a ‘Shinsou’ and turned right around if you three hadn't stopped him.]

“Let me get this straight.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, massaging the thin layer of skin to soothe an oncoming migraine.

Since being unceremoniously shoved into a chair, he’d learned that you three goblins were trying to imitate a side-effect of Erasure. More specifically, the apparent scientific marvel of his anti-gravity hair.

“You want me to activate Erasure, knowing it'll exacerbate my dry eye for a science experiment?”

You three share a look and answer in unison. “Yes.”

He sighs. “Fine. Let's get this over with.”

Shinsou and Zashi share a fist bump, and the three of you partake in a round of high fives.

“But,” Aizawa stresses, cutting your celebration short. “You only have fifteen minutes to figure out whatever it is you're looking for. And for the record,” There’s a slight pause as he drags one of the dinette chairs from the kitchen and subsequently plops into it. “I highly doubt this will yield any meaningful results.”

“Babe, you let us worry about that.” Zashi kisses his forehead, squatting further down to connect their lips, when Shouta lifts his head, searching for them.

“Yeah! You're just worried you won't be the only one with magical floaty hair.” You back-up your DJ, lifting a handful of Shinsou’s ube-colored hair and raising it by the ends to imitate the levitation effect of Erasure.

“Whatever.” Aizawa makes himself comfortable since he’ll be sitting for the next ten minutes and counting.

You, Zashi, and Shinsou scramble for solutions when his eyes blaze red and do the cool glowy effect; you examine the hero’s hair thoroughly, and a series of trials and errors follow (with Shinsou as the guinea pig). Hizashi is too protective of his hair, and who knows if you, darling reader, even can participate. So! Shinsou is the man of the hour. Shin-son is given a thorough head massage with two balloons, one held by you and the other held by Zashi.

Meanwhile, Shouta slurps on a jelly pouch (peach flavored) to divert his attention away from the itch behind his eyelids.

The static pull was pretty weak when Zashi lifted his balloon, but with your accompaniment, you had a decent replication of Aizawa's Erasure. However, it's clear that if you three want the full effect, you're going to need at least six of them.

And guess which goobers have six hands combined?

“Hold these for us, munchkin!” Shinsou accepts both balloons with nothing more than a hum, ignoring that each is a shade of purple; Hizashi is a menace, but his antics are expected.

“Seven minutes left.” The gruff voice of Aizawa informs.

“Okay, all at once!” Your excitement can't be bottled—anxious for this spontaneous science experiment to come to fruition. But if it could, you'd buy the entire stock to relive this moment all over again. You're on the cusp of greatness—the edge of success. And God, is it going to taste sweet.

“Count’a three?” Shinsou drawled, sounding as lethargic as his father (on his fifth jelly pouch.)

That dry eye must be a pain in the ass.

And oh, did that get Hizashi’s DJ spirit pumping. There's nothing like a good count down to rev up a hype man. “Yo! I'm gettin’ hype! Let's knock this puppy so far outta the park they’ll need Sir Night Eye to see how far into the solar system it's gonna land!!”

“One!” You enthusiastically chirp.

“Two.” Shinsou’s monotone is the spitting image of Aizawa.

“THREE!!” Mic screamed.

Armed with double ammo, the three of you are a blur of color. Shinsou is given the deepest scalp massage of his life, and Aizawa is five moves away from either victory or defeat (he’s immersed in the sugary world of Candy Crush).

“We did it!”

“Pog.”

“That's how you do it, baby! GG, gamers. We got that bread.”

Shouta looks up from his phone, stilling in his seat when he sees a reflection of his younger self.

Shinsou has worn the binding cloth Shouta gifted him every day without fail since he received it. You, Hizashi, and Shouta found it cute, so neither of you commented on it. The metal alloy bound around his neck only made the resemblance more uncanny—more emotionally moving.

Unbeknownst to Shouta, Shinsou is equally floored. He's looking in the mirror, and he sees his hero staring back. All the times he'd dressed up in costume as a child had nothing on this moment. He's given supportive hugs from you and his blonde father when he wipes his eyes. That's all Shouta needed to see. His arms silently envelop his son, and he murmurs how proud he is, not only of how far Hitoshi has come in his hero training but of the young man Shinsou has grown into and the man he's still becoming. Those accolades lose neither sincerity nor vehemence as Hitoshi's shoulders tremble, and they don't stop when he grabs the front of Aizawa's hero outfit for stability. Aizawa hugs him just as fiercely when Shinsou throws his arms around him.

You take three separate photos: the first depicts Hizashi, Shinsou, and yourself. You're holding your balloons over Shinsou’s rather electric hairstyle. The second illustrates you, Shinsou, and Zashi yet again. You each have one balloon held above your respective heads, throwing peace signs toward the camera. And last (a personal fan favorite) is a photo relatively similar to the first one, except Aizawa is activating Erasure to help demonstrate the resemblance.

The last shot finds itself on Mic’s Instagram for all those little listeners out there who haven't decided what they want to be for Halloween yet. Present Mic invites them to try the ‘Eraserhead Challenge.’ It's a fun activity and an excellent way for children to learn about the ins and outs of static electricity!

You and Shinsou stick the balloons to Aizawa’s body. And unfortunately, the many cats and kittens descend upon him like mini lions on a fresh t-bone steak.

Don't worry, he “died” a happy man.

[Enter you, Hizashi, and Shouta mellowing out on the couch, snuggled up like lovebirds]

“Shouta...!” The hero spares you a glance after the dramatic groan but goes right back to his Kindle.

“Yea?”

‘Yeah?’ ‘yeah?!’ How dare he ‘yeah’ you?!

“Prince.”

He sighs. “Yes, kitten?”

You smile, cuddling into his side. “That's better.” You kiss his cheek and fizzle like soda and pop rocks when he leans over to return it.

“Shouta.”

“Mm?”

“Babies are cute.”

...?

Okay, that got his attention.

Shouta eyes you skeptically, unsure where this is going and wary of finding out.

You pull out your phone at the suspicious side-eye he sends your way, showing him the adorable baby videos you'd been watching on Pinterest. “That’s...subjective.” He eventually mutters.

Why are you showing him this?

“And while we’re on that subject...”

Apprehensive, Shouta sought help from his husband. Hizashi is already tuned in to the conversation, gaze shifting between you and Aizawa.

“CanIhaveababy?!”

It took him a minute to unravel the compound sentence you threw at him, but when he eventually untangled it, he merely sighed. “No.” His eyes are still narrowed, uncertain if this is another one of your pranks. “We already have Shinsou.”

“Ugh!” You groaned, flinging yourself against the cushions. “Shin-chin is cute, but he's a teenager. I want a baby.”

“We’ll get you a kitten.”

You flail your limbs like a toddler throwing a tantrum. “We already have like three of those, thanks to you!”

“Well then,” Aizawa pockets your phone. “problem solved.” Shouta kept it out of your reach when you groused and fussed at him. He hides his smirk under his turtle neck; even now, you're the most lovable sweetheart. “You don't need to be watching things like that.”

You pout and turn your sights on Zashi. “Hi-Fi? Can I have a baby?”

Oh, Zashi can't stand his baby frowning! If something is wrong with his princess, something is wrong with him. He looks from your pleading expression to the death glare Aizawa spears him with. Those puppy eyes break him in seconds; already, he's scooping you up for cuddles. Mic’s kisses are snow flurries on your grinning face.

“Of course, pumpkin! How many?”

“Zashi!”

“Hizashi, already said yes.”

Shouta looked toward the DJ in disbelief, a comical expression of betrayal on his face. “Zashi?!”

“I asked him earlier.” You preened, hugging Hizashi. “Two against one. You're outnumbered, caffeinated kitty.”

Not caffeinated enough.

Hizashi is looking ANYWHERE but his husband. “In my defense, I thought you'd be down for it.”

“So you decided to make such an important decision without consulting me first?”

“Uh, yes? I'm sorry? ...I love you?”

“Fine... No more than three.”

─────────────────────

You: Can I have a baby?

Hizashi: Yes.

Aizawa: No.

EM: *glances at each other*

Hizashi: No.

Aizawa: Yes.

EM: *looks at you* “Yes.”

[stardust-rust]

This is to answer an anon question about my post "The Weight of Victory" which I've omitted by request (hope this is okay!).

SPOILERS FOR CHAP 362!!!!!

**********

**********

So - yes, ABSOLUTELY therein lies the tragedy of Katsuki's almost-toxic relationship with "Victory." That there is an awful irony to his revival because he wants no casualties, yet someone died for his sake.

Everyone on that battlefield thinks Katsuki should win, and somehow they all think Edgeshot's life is worth the trade? Because I found it incredibly interesting that we specifically see Monoma's reaction to Katsuki's death - it's supposed to hammer in the fact that even his most ardent and mouthy detractor is shocked by Katsuki's loss (or at least, he didn't expect him to die).

But flip that around, and you have yet another convert to the "Katsuki wins" dogma, even though Monoma believed he brought down All Might and isn't worthy to be a hero.

The way Katsuki inspires the drive to win in his teammates and detractors is a double-edged sword: We need you to win vs We need you to win. There are no less than 5 others on the battlefield (and many more on the sidelines) and NONE of them protested Edgeshot giving up his life to revive Katsuki (granted, I don't expect a round table conference to discuss it in the middle of a war, but still). Even Best Jeanist merely cautioned Edgeshot that he "couldn’t return from this" instead of being "holy shit that's cray cray don't do it."

And why is that? Why do they believe Katsuki is absolutely necessary for this war? Beyond the whole "elders must support and look after the younger" is it their belief Katsuki holds the key to winning? Is their grand plan dependent on Katsuki's involvement (if it was, I don't think he would have been as reckless as to fight ShigAFO in close quarters - which ShigAFO himself commented on)? Do they think Deku "needs" his Symbol of Victory to hold it together enough to defeat ShigAFO?

Why must Katsuki bear the weight of these expectations, the heart-clenching grief of this sacrifice? His entire ethos as a hero - "no casualties, perfect victory" is completely invalidated by this death (and I know we're still assuming this is death for Edgeshot, but The Surgery seems almost complete). Sure we can argue that after this sacrifice Katsuki can still go on and inspire the next gen of heroes with a greater significance to his ethos, borne out of solemn experience and not arrogant naiveté, but it's still kind of heartbreaking.

I once wrote in a fic "Katsuki wants to drag Deku close and force him to confront the cost of his dreams, the price that everyone who loves him has to pay." And it's so so painful that the same thing is happening to Katsuki when there is a very complicated argument for whether winning is solely something he wants from himself, or what Deku (and everyone else) wants from him.

Katsuki did not ask nor expect to be resurrected, because his life was his own to sacrifice and in some ways it should have been respected (EVEN THOUGH I AM VERY VERY VERY GLAD HE'S COMING BACK I'M JUST SAYING THERE IS AN ARGUMENT FOR CONSENT AND ETHICS HERE but if their grand plan does need him I will accept this sacrifice as necessary). Horikoshi's own words "Saving (and destroying) are both born out of ego" is VERY APT here.

When Katsuki wakes up he will have to confront the grim consequences of his "weakness" YET AGAIN and also the HEAVIER weight of expectations that's been thrust upon him. Anon I am afraid too 😭😭😭

[remus-thecreative]

Its such a long song we will just split this into 2-3 parts lol ANYWAYS enjoy part 1 of this late thing for #AroSidesWeek

Give Us Euphoria PART 1

Songfic (Euphoria by MUSE) 

Every side is aro-spec in these fics we create; this focuses on Remus and Patton. Obligatory disclaimer: this is based on both the source material AND our fictives (Rat and Frog were collaborators actually lol). They made sure to get each other's consent/permission to team up and write this, as should anyone writing about ppl they know irl. 

Content Warnings: minor injuries, self deprecation, talking about depression and dissociation, suggestive nicknames.

Anyways, enjoy!

Shut down

We are growing spiritless

If no one cares, then who is gonna save us?

Give us euphoria

Remus was really, really fucking bored. Not just in general, but emotionally it felt like someone had squeezed out every drop of water from its octopus appendages and left it to dry in the desert. More literally, he hadn't moved from underneath his own bed in… yeah he wasn't even going to try counting. Groaning pathetically, the side glanced over to its right, relishing in the sudden pain due to the fact its eyes had not moved much for hours. Pain was good in these times, was grounding and very real unlike far too many dark fantasies Thomas would never bother even considering. But, that wasn't the main reason he had looked to his right; no it was…. shit, why had Remus-

"FUCK! This is just sad, and I don't do sad shit unless it's paired with grotesque horrors!"

The words were nearly ripped out of its throat that was rather dry, frustration almost palpable. A fit of coughing was followed by the admittedly theatrical creaking of the duke's joints as the side crawled out from underneath the bed. Ew, physical exhaustion of the depressed variety. Whether he had the energy or not, he was going to get to the bottom of this problem that was becoming disturbingly clear in its source. Not bothering to check on the state of its outfit and grimacing at the still extremely empty 'dark sides' living room, Remus took in a deep breath and put what it hoped was a winning and deranged smile on its face while giggling out:

"I hope someone is ready for a visitor from hell…"

Worn out

Everything will fall apart

So shine a light and warm up this heavy heart

And give us euphoria

It hadn't been the best week for Patton, and if he was going to be honest, the near future wasn't looking that much better. Despite the continuous progress with everyone figuring out how to work best with each other, all the new discoveries about Thomas' sides, and the growing acceptance of many… it had taken a lot of emotional energy he hadn't expected. 

Honestly, his own shortcomings regarding being morality stung worse than what was left of his strained relationships; relationships in general had always been confusing and difficult for Patton. Never sure when the exact moment a person becomes a friend or lover, so he had always tried to be equally affectionate to everyone. Lost when it came to what's supposed to happen when a relationship ends or changes. Unaware if the annoyance or exasperation he felt from others at his puns were simply in the moment or a sign he had made a significant overstep, so he kept them all as harmless and cute as he could. Yes, Patton had done his best! Only, that wasn't actually the correct action. The right thing to do. He supposed it was all connected after all, morality and relationships. 

Which brought him to the present, a tired chuckle making its way past his lips as he realized he'd spaced out yet again instead of getting ready for the day. 

"At least I'm already dressed to impress! Well besides my glasses, where did I set them last night…"

Patton started off cheerfully, voice getting quieter as he stood up and searched the room with the enthusiasm of a cat sensing an oncoming bathing in a tub. Although leaving his room was a must when he wasn't feeling his best, it was tempting. Then again, he had plans to talk to a certain snake today, and really didn't want Janus of all sides to get worried about him, or even worse, disappointed. That should have been enough to speed up the finding process, but strangely enough he still couldn't find his glasses. Brows now furrowed, Patton put his hands on his hips and almost let himself get upset, brown eyes widening in fright as he caught himself. 

"No no no, I cannot be doing that! Not after the frogger incident-"

"-I think you mean the coolest shit ever that you should do more often, Patton-With-The-Cake!"

The shriek that left Patton was quite mild compared to the jump his body performed as Remus popped into his room. 

[suganovakawa]

𝐒𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐄 .

PAIRINGS : tooru oikawa x fem! reader , slight hajime iwaizumi x fem! reader

GENRE : angst , romance

WARNINGS : cursing , car accident , recovery from amnesia

SYNOPSIS : tooru doesn’t understand how special you are to him until he comes close to losing you forever . as he struggles to comes to grips with his feelings and balance it with his future , you still have to recover from your own injuries , but without your memories to assist you .

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 < [ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄 ] > 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐄𝐍

he knows what could happen if you remember. he’ll do anything to prevent that.

word count : 1.6k

saudade masterlist .

SAUDADE

( 𝐧 . ) a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant , or that has been loved and then lost ; “ the love that remains ”

⠀whatever iwaizumi was thinking, he certainly had no logic. honestly, he probably would've been better off just not telling you a thing about oikawa. after all, he should've known from the start it's in human nature to want to push past restrictions forced upon them. and as much as it pained him, he knew he had messed up bad, his anger getting the best of his common sense and regretting it a day later.

⠀he knew you were curious about your boyfriend.

⠀rather, the boyfriend you didn't even know you had.

⠀from the very beginning, hajime could see it in your eyes - the natural attraction your body held as you and oikawa first exchanged short glances towards each other in class. volleyball had taught him to be quite the observer, and you made no effort in being subtle. unfortunately for iwa, oikawa noticed your innocent curiosity as well.

⠀he was afraid to ask you more about what you remember. it was different from the first day you had woken up from your coma, you were completely out of it so your muddled brain couldn't have remembered nor recollected much. now that you were spending regular time at school, just like normal, your memories might have just resurfaced sporadically. as far as hajime knew, you remembered everything, just pretending like you're still suffering from memory loss.

⠀but he knew you weren't like that. you wouldn't do that to him.

⠀you two weren't best friends before the accident, basically just friendly acquaintances who shared the same pain in trying to make the aoba johsai volleyball captain learn how to stop and take a damn breather. you had made it quite obvious in the past that you were an admirer of oikawa's, much to hajime's dismay - but he suppressed such feelings, in fear he'd be seen as too selfish.

⠀and he paid the price by seeing you happy in oikawa's arms.

⠀maybe iwaizumi was biased, but tooru really was more on the shitty side when it came to being a boyfriend. he had asked his peer countless times why he had accepted your feelings when he knew he didn't have time for a relationship; and every single time, hajime would get the exact same answer:

⠀"she made me happy at the winter tournaments, i'm only returning the sentiments."

⠀does causing your car accident count as making you happy?

⠀seeing how determined tooru was to get close to you again, pissed hajime off. what was there to be pissed off about, though? if this was a game, iwaizumi was winning. oikawa lost everything, from his reputation to his girlfriend. hajime was on his way to making you happier than tooru ever could. there was no competition here - he had this hook, line, and sinker.

⠀at least, he should have it in the sinker.

⠀a part of him knew, deep down, he was always default to second place. even without your memories, you still had your conscience, that internal voice in the back of your head that still held its senses. and if your conscience was stupid enough to adore oikawa even after everything he's done to you, how could the ace possibly fight against it? you could've died. and it would've been oikawa's harsh words as the true perpetrator.

⠀he wanted to prove a point to himself, you, and oikawa. that he was worth it. that you shouldn't have to waste your time with a scumbag who took your adoration and admiration for granted. the entire team knew that tooru wasn't the type to put anything over volleyball, and he displayed that when it came to your guys' relationship. while the captain was deserving of any praise he received that was volleyball related, hajime knew that it was unfair for you to be neglected because he spends so much time and energy on it.

⠀"hajime? are you listening to me?"

⠀he turned his head towards you, your words shaking him out of his daze. he blinked a couple of times and sat up, turning his head so his attention was fully on you. "sorry, y/n. a bit tired today. what do you need?"

⠀"huh? i don't need anything." you shook your head. "i was telling you that makki and mattsun were inviting me to go out with them today, just out to eat so they can also fill me in on random things, and to talk a little more. i said yes because they seem nice enough, and you seem to trust them, so i didn't have a reason to say no. i just wanted to tell you because i'm not going to be walking home, so you don't need to take me today."

⠀hajime's heart dropped to the abyss in his stomach.

⠀you were going to what?

⠀he knew exactly what those two were planning on telling you, and he was not having any of it. panic bubbled and almost erupted out in the open, but he saved himself with a deep breath and a plastic smile, nodding his head slowly. "right, i trust them... yeah. you have fun with that." you appeared happy with what he said, giving him a quick hug before walking off. he waited for you to turn the corner before walking off on his own, his jaw clenched and his destination set.

⠀"iwaizumi, where's - " hanamaki was grabbed by the tie as the brunet glared at his former teammate, his eyes anything but nice. "what are you doing? let me go. i'm supposed to be meeting - "

⠀"i know what you're fucking doing," he spat, his grip around makki's uniform only tightening. "this isn't just some random meeting. y/n asked you for this meet up, didn't she? she wants to know stuff, and figured you two would willingly comply." he laughed, more of a mocking volume. "and what do you know, she was right."

⠀"iwaizumi, let me go." the male with pink hued hair snapped more sternly the second time around; hajime hesitated for a few moments before reluctantly releasing his grip on his fellow third year, who pressed his lips together as he fixed his uniform hastily. "you got us," he muttered, his eyes finding iwa's. "she came to us during lunch and kept asking us. you were already on your way back to the table so we simply told her we'd tell her after school. that's all."

⠀"that's all, my fucking ass." pointing an index finger in takahiro's face, hajime shook his head. "you better not tell her about oikawa. she's much better off without that piece of shit in her life."

⠀"but she has a right to know."

⠀iwaizumi's face paled, taking a step back as makki crossed his arms. holy shit, he was serious. he and makki were going to tell you everything. "she's a big girl, iwaizumi. she wants to remember her life before the car accident. i can't imagine what she's going through, having her memories blacked out like that. i know if i was her, i'd want to know every single detail." makki's eyes narrowed. "including the memories that could hurt me."

⠀hajime's hands clenched into fists as he shook his head again in protest, sticking his foot out to prevent the other from walking forward. "over my dead body will i let you do that. the last thing she needs is a reminder of the nightmare he put her through. you won't tell her a fucking word about it."

⠀"or are you just scared you'll lose her to oikawa again?"

⠀just that question was a punch to the stomach as hanamaki observed iwaizumi's reaction. a corner of his lips protruded upwards as he stared at the other male in the hallway, the truth so horribly obvious. "doesn't take an idiot to see how set you are in making y/n fall for you. using her amnesia to your advantage to brainwash her into forgetting oikawa and becoming her new boyfriend... i was on your side at first, iwa. now? you're being just as shitty as he is."

⠀"don't you fucking compare me to him. i'm not like him, and i will never treat her like shit."

⠀"maybe not like shit, but she's certainly more like a prize than an actual person in your eyes."

⠀takahiro watched the frustration boil to hajime's face, taking a deep breath and walking around him before he could be stopped again. "if you excuse me, you made me late. i'm sure y/n will - " he grunted as a sharp pain grabbed hold of his wrist, his eyes widening slightly as hajime seethed at him, jaw clenched and face glowing angrily.

⠀"i said, you're not telling her anything."

⠀"who's going to stop me?"

⠀iwaizumi's smile was anything but pleasant as he pointing towards the school entrance. "mattsun and y/n are waiting for us, right? we shouldn't leave them waiting for too long."

⠀makki's breath hitched in his throat at the realization and cursed to himself quietly, shaking his head as he had no choice but to pull hajime along with him. "your logic is fucked up. y/n is nothing but a trophy for you to show off."

⠀"y/n means more to me than what you could ever hope to understand. keep walking, bastard."

⠀"hajime? what are you doing here?" your face revealed genuine surprise as he had appeared right beside hanamaki, releasing his iron grip on his wrist before exiting aoba johsai. "i thought you were walking home?"

⠀he could see the silent exchange of glances going on between the other two, and he could tell by matsukawa's quiet but exasperated sigh that he understood what was going on. iwaizumi pretended to not notice, however, as he moved to stand next to you. he saw the confusion flickering within your irises, how they were averted towards the ground instead of looking at him. if only he could tell you how important you were to him and why he was acting this way for your own good, maybe you'd understand his side better.

⠀"i figured since i was hungry, i'd join you guys. after all, we all trust each other enough to discuss anything, right?"

a / n : second post today! promised it would come out soon 🥳 ALSO, THANK YOU SM FOR 900 FOLLOWERS !!! it truly means the world to me that you all decide to stick around my profile, i promise i’ll do the best i can to provide content worthy of your attention 🥺❤️

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[gummy-dummy]

Hi everyone! This is my first fic on Tumblr, it's just here, for now, I'm excited and kinda nervous too, my native language it's Spanish and I'm trying to be better at English so sorry for the grammars mistakes, I hope you like it, dear reader.

Warnings: Probably bad grammar or mistakes, swearing, mention of knives, mentions of death, kinda cute, kinda soft, confused Dabi, he doesn't know but he a softie.

It was pretty late when Shoto and I started doing our night patrol, it had been 3 months since we graduated from the UA in the hero course, the first 4 of the class were invited to work at Endeavor’s agency, Deku, Dynamight, Shoto and me, Artemis. We were the new pro-heroes with the biggest expectation from the public.

Endeavor wasn't the best at talking but I trust him, also thanks to him I don't have to worry about rent, the agency offered departments near the agency, and the rooms in the agency’s building were comfortable enough, usually, the new group was Split into two for patrol, Deku always had to go with Dynamght, he was the only one who can keep up with Bakugo’s shit, Shoto and me, we already were pretty Good Friends, I even can say we are each other’s confidant, it was a pretty nice night shift together, the absence of noise and people (and Bakugo’s shit), made it go smoothly as always. We are used to talking about everything, in the streets we could say anything, and no one more than us knew what secrets lay between us. There were secrets that Shoto didn’t want his father to know, not that he cares, but just to protect the people that he loved.

The current number one hero thought that the friendship we share will eventually become a love story, but oh boy, little did he know. Shoto had romantic feelings for another hero, I am pretty much the only person that Shoto has physical contact with, hugs and rest on each other shoulders, that's why his dad thinks of us that way. I don’t have family near where we are but the Todoroki family accepted me as one of their own since Endeavor thinks that I and Shoto are together we had to explain to Shoto’s siblings and Mom that he was in love with someone else, they didn’t care at all.

Suddenly the cold wind of the night started to get weird, making the residual trash of the city blow roll in the air, we both started to run there to know what was happening, at the moment we got close enough a black and purple substance started emerging from nowhere, it was a warp, the kind that the League of Villains has Access to, Shigaraki Tomura came out first, being followed by the tall, half-burned popcorn (as Shoto and I like to call him) Dabi, Toga right behind them with other 3 members.

I summoned my light arrows on my bow, I shoot an arrow at the leader and the tall man with black hair just disintegrates it with his blue fire. Like it was nothing.‘What are you doing here?’ Shoto asked the team of villains, Shigaraki just started to laugh ‘We came to get some groceries, what the fuck he is trying to do? Distract us?

I just rolled my eyes and said ‘Yeah well, here, you have something to add to your list I quickly prepared my bow with a new arrow, this time a stronger one, that can’t be destroyed so easily. The amount of power that this one has, with the purple hue and the energy that makes everything feel like an earthquake made the leader of the team look at it with fear in his eyes, Dabi tried to take it with his fire, but nothing happened, the arrow just started to follow all of Shigaraki’s moves, so again the man in front of him tried to catch it with his bare hands, oh what an error was that. The indentation that my arrow left on his right hand wouldn’t heal properly at all, not till I gave the order to my arrow to disappear in the wind.

Dabi just looks at me, while the others started to attack us he just stayed on the side, watching every move I make, (with) Shoto work pretty well with each other, we know our quirks and how to enhance each other's quirks.

There was a lady that appears to be new into the league, I never saw her before, she started to shoot mini grenades from her hand, making me jump to the side to avoid it, one laid between my feet, I didn't notice it until it hit me if that thing blows I die.

I'm going to die here.

The last thing I heard was a scream, Shoto screaming my real name, and then... darkness.

The next thing I know is that I'm in a completely white room, very small, I'm chained to one of the sides of a small bed, being forced to stay seated on the cold floor, if I am in one of the League facilities why they want me here? the murder of a new pro-hero would be an accomplishment by the league, why don't make it while I sleep? it would be something to make all the world feel unsafe, make all the heroes feel in danger. I hear the noise of the door opening, someone calls my name.

Dabi, that jerk, wait he was the one that saved me, at the moment the grenade exploded he just took my arm and yanked me out of the way, and took me in the warp with him.

"Hey Hawkeye!", he looked different than the night of the attack, just with his t-shirt and trousers, not his usual jacket, he looks more laid back than when fighting. He started to look preoccupied while I think how to escape, I'm not responding to him.

"Shit, no, did they do something while I was gone? Hey look at me, can you hear me? oh, these little shits are going to pay, I told them not to touch you" I just roll my eyes and say "What the fuck do you want from me you extra crispy fried ass?" he just stares at me confused for a couple of seconds and says "I'm not- Hey don't talk to me like that I'm your savior, remember? maybe I would let them do things to you, maybe I could take this food and let you starve".

He has a plate in a hand and glass with what appears to be fruit juice on the other. "Why would you feed me? do you know that keeps me alive, right? why didn't you kill me already?" I'm really confused, isn't better to kill someone while they're asleep, or this mother fucker want's to torture me. "That's because I don't want to kill you, dummy hero". Then why did he bring me here? what is the league planning to do to me? so I ask what the league wants from me.

"What makes you think there's a plan behind this?"

"Why else would a fucking villain kidnap a pro-hero if not to use them for something?"

"Well, there's nothing behind this, no one knows why I have you here actually I don't even know why I did it, but you were going to die and I just acted"- oh he should let me die, I'm gonna kick his pretty face when I get the chance.

"What do you want? you know it was going to be easier to kill me while I was unconscious, right?"

"Why do you keep telling me to kill you?"

"This is why"- there's a thing that not a lot of people know about my quirk, the bow, and the arrows are just a form I use it to be more precise, that doesn't mean that's the only thing it does.

With my both hands tied I conjured a little of my energy to make a knife to set me free, I break the cloth that keeps me hand-tied to the bed, throwing a punch at his face, he doesn't move I'm trying to get Dabi down but he is just there, he is not moving or trying to attack me at all, looking at me with sadness in his eyes.

"Hey what the fuck, why don't you attack me? aren't you afraid that I'm going to beat your ass?"- He looks like he is in pain but doesn't fight back.

"I know you could," he says with a sad smirk, what's happening here? by a couple of times, I saw him before he never acted this way.

"Can you please just calm down, let me talk, and I'll let you go if you want"

I intertwined my eyes with him, a beautiful blue, exactly the color of his flames, I don't know why, but I want to hear what he has to say, he looks so sad, but also a little surprised when I sit at the small bed. It looks like he never thought I actually would hear his reasons.

He kicks gently the plate with the food by the side and sits on the little makeshift bed, the bed is so small that we can't avoid our knees touching, he doesn't try to tie my hands again, I could conjure a big weapon, maybe just a simple bat and then scape, I know I can win, so why am I anxious to hear him? he looks at me a couple of seconds, lets out a loud breath, and starts talking.

"Well, when you attacked me, I caught one of your arrows right?" he looks at me and I nodded "Look" he shows me his left hand, inviting me to take his hand on mine.

It's rough, more than calloused, the years of him using his quirk took a lot out of his hands, they were burned, when I touched him I thought it would hurt, but he just opened his eyes a little more in surprise and looked at me again.

"Ok you have your hands burned, what about it? it's your quirk right?" he lets out a little smile that if I wasn't looking at him this close probably would have missed it. "Yeah they're burned, I don't have feeling on them, even if I take something with force or catch anything, can't feel it."

I'm starting to understand what's happening here, but I want him to tell me anyways "Yesterday, when you shot your arrow when I caught it I-"why does he look so nervous? "I felt it, I felt the pain of the arrow, and I felt you, well, your quirk, whatever it is, I just felt your touch"

What I am supposed to say about that?- "I'm sorry?" I say confused "No no it's okay I just want to know how you did it" I don't know why I have the desire to touch him again, I need to help him, he is a villain, a cute one if I say so myself but a villain nonetheless. A villain very dangerous that just wants the world to burn, but look so lost, with the same face you see on a lost child on a Mall

"I don't know, my quirk it's just based on energy, I don't know where it comes from, It just appears when I want to and takes the form I need, I used to lost control over it a lot," I say while moving my fingers letting the violet ribbons go around my hand "Now I can control it using it as weapons, the one that makes me feel more comfortable is the bow and arrow, that way I can control it a little more, but I pretty much can conjure anything" He nodded and looks at my hand.

I show him again, letting a little ball of my energy dance between my fingers and let it go, I made it stay in one of his hands, he started playing with it, like a child with a new toy that was waiting to get for Christmas day, a smile started to appear on his face, not a cruel one, that he usually used, this one was of happiness, he looks handsome, the scars on his face makes him feel unique. I'm not sure what I'm doing till I come back to my senses, I'm catching his face between my hands, he just looks at me surprised.

I run my thumbs right below his eyes, he leans into the touch and closes his blue eyes.

"You know that I can attack you now and escape right?" "I know, but you don't want to do that, I am right?"

He is, he is sure about it and I am too, but why? he probably has me here to lend information about heroes, but he isn't asking anything about it.

"No, I don't want to, why? did you get me drugged or something?" I say smiling at him for the first time "No, Toga tried to get a little bit of your blood but every time she wanted to get a needle into your skin, a purple energy, your energy, surrounded you, Shigaraki wanted to use real knives but I- I didn't let them hurt you, I didn't want them to hurt you".

And to end: this is the first chapter, it's gonna be probably 2 o 3 chapters, I'll probably add some warnings if needed.

Love

Gummy.

[angstyclowns]

Yo! So I just finished reading the Class 1A x Hidden Omega Reader, and I'm obsessed! Can I request some more of that? Like how the student characters specifically react and how they handle it, and of course more Dadzawa

Alrighty! Let’s do this!

VV SLIGHT MANGA SPOILERS VVV

This also got kind of long so I put a cut!

Class 1-A x Hidden! Omega! Reader!

Class 1-A. The a stands for angels

So, let’s go back to the previous point for a hot second and re-touch on some stuff I said there. 

Midoriya. 

Izuku ‘cinnamon roll’ Midoriya can be one scary motherfucker. Alright? 

With one for all down, and the new discovery of black whip, he could make fucking All might wet himself. 

Alrigh? This alpha knows what it’s like to be bullied because of things out of your control and he abso-fucking-lutely doesn’t stand for this shit. 

And the worst part of this all is no one expects him. 

Midoriya? You mean the kid that walked into the door then apologized to it? 

That quickly turns into-

Midoriya? You mean that alpha that nearly tore out someone’s throat when they laughed at you?

Like he can be scary. 

The same thing goes to Eijirou ‘Sunshine shark’ Kirishima

He rarely uses not only his alpha status but his intimidating features when dealing with people. 

But when it comes to you?

Baby shark -> Daddy shark REAL FUCKING QUICK

His teeth are snarling and glimmering in the light as whoever’s bugging you slowly backs away 

Again, it’s worse than people like Bakugo and Todoroki because no one expects them. 

Sunshine and lollipops aren’t expected to burn you when you least expect it. 

When they’re with you though, it’s like it all turns around. They’re purring, laughing, scenting, everything. They  even have snacks in their bags for a moments notice. 

Todoroki and Bakugo and the next on the list of to-be-feared.

Their outrageously protective, but what sets them away from the other two is that their outright with their protectiveness. 

Todoroki didn’t originally get the feeling his alpha was yelling at him about, but when he overheard you explaining to Midoriya and Kirishima about how it’s natural for their alpha’s to feel protective over you 

Bakugo refuses to admit he’s protective over you. 

But he is. Everyone sees it. Everyone sees the omega-special meals he pre-preps for you for lunch. They see him scenting a sweater for your nest ever other week without a complaint.  They see it all. 

He has come to accept the role as your personal chef albeit with mumbled grumbles. 

 Now, Let’s move on to the other students. 

Aoyama is your personal designer, alright? alright. Like he’s constantly designing you new outfits and gifting you new shirts, jackets, pants, socks, undergarments

Okay- that sounds weird I know. But Aoyama means nothing but good things. He asked you beforehand and explained that if he custom makes them it’s a win-win. He gets practice and you get things that fit like their supposed to. 

And you swear, he has a second quirk that allows him to make the comfiest bras. And not just sports bras, all bras. Like classy black and lacey ones that make everything look good or spicy red ones that make you preen with pride when you look at yourself in the meeting.  And he’s living for doing this for you. 

Mina is also one of your go to fashion people. she picks out outfits and finds amazing fits for your figure. 

Between her and Aoyama your like a mini fashion show everyday. 

She, like aizawa, has an app that tracks your heats, so she knows when they come before you do. 

Tsuyu is your level headed friend that keeps your bursting out in sobs when frustrations come to a new head. She’s one of the few allowed in your nest without having to ask before hand. 

Tenya! Tenya Iida also has the app! And emergency snacks! And an emergency heat pack both in the dorms and in class. 

He’s also firm in making sure bigots can’t get near you, but sometimes he’s stuck with the rules and unable to do anything. 

People like Koda, Ojiro, Fumikage, Sato and Shoji are always down to comfort you with hugs and cuddles when you feel overwhelmed.

And Shoji hugs are best hugs- change my mind. 

Hagakure, Ochako and Momo have snacks hidden everywhere for you. 

And blankets. 

Momo, Todoroki and Iida are constantly buying new blankets for your nest. 

Ochako hums you to sleep in her arms on nights you can’t sleep. 

Jiro also sings you to sleep.  She’s also allowed in your nest without asking. 

The rocker girl makes it her priority to teach you any instrument of your choice and she’s super  patient with you. 

Kaminari and Sero are the first people to tickle you into crying pleas of mercy and giggles when your upset. These two are the alphas  that will drop everything to make you feel better. 

Honestly, you’ve lost count how many times you’ve been sandwiched between them on Sero’s hammock, watching Disney+ on a television sitting on a table a little ways away. 

Dadzawa is also high on the to-be-feared list. Alright? 

Like he has rules. 

No talking to alphas that you don’t know. 

No talking to anyone you don’t know. 

No venturing off just because something is shiny. 

No- 

The list goes on. 

Aizawa gives you his personal number-- along with the rest of the class-- so you always have a way to contact him. 

He saves you under ‘Favorite child’ but no one needs to know about that. 

Mic knows. Mic also has you saved under favorite child. He’s not shy about that like Aizawa is.

Aizawa always stands next to you when the class goes somewhere. 

when you guys went to the museum he was forced to purchase a backpack with a leash. 

Whenever you guys go somewhere, he has one of the alphas in class hold the leash. 

Its most, of the time, Shoji or Iida. 

Todoroki used to be there, but after buying out half a gift shop using Endeav-whores credit card....

Yeah, Aizawa can’t trust him anymore. He needs someone who will be firm with you and keep you on track. 

He’s the definition of papa bear tbh. 

Like ever wonder why I haven’t mention M*neta in this post?

Mineta once stole one of your custom made sets from Aoyama. 

You had cried, not because you were upset but because you thought you lost them. 

Aoyama explained that he knew you didn’t loose them because he was there when you put them away.

A few alphas put the pieces together but none were as angry as Aizawa. 

You still shiver thinking of the angry rage he expressed. 

M*neta was expelled that day. 

Moral of the story, class 1-A loves you.

And you love them!

[bloodyspade0000]

30-day knb challenge: Day 1- Favorite Male character

↳ Haizaki Shougo

I am not justifying Haizaki's behaviour. I think he needs a tall glass of respect woman juice and therapy. This is just meant to explain why he is my favourite character and help you better understand him as a character. Do not send hate or take my words out of context. You will be reported, deleted and cancelled. Thank you and enjoy. :)

My favourite character is Haizaki Shougo *dodges tomatoes* a lot of people in the fandom hate this guy for many reasons. It's kind of funny how many people hate him and the amount of hate he gets just for existing. Like bruh; he's sixteen, leave him alone. 😂

His whole existence is just sad. He was literally created to be hated.

Like straight up, Tadatoshi Fujimaki even admitted that he hated Haizaki. Haizaki's sole purpose of existing is to make the Generation of Miracles look better even though they’re just as problematic as he. No one is fucking perfect and is about time people woke the fuck up and realized it. Your faves are problematic move the fuck on.

Yes, the Miracles are redeemable but so is Haizaki. Yet, unlike the Miracles, he does not get redeemable. No, he disappears and is never seen again. Like bitch, what the fuck!? if you’re gonna introduce a character to only have them disappear for a long time and either have them show up again or just never mention them again. Wasting the potential they had to be a very good character or not having them redeem themselves while the other characters who were just as fucking problematic get a fucking redemption arc because they’re fucking main characters!? What’s the point of that character even existing in the first place? What kind of bullshit is that? Just to have them exist to make the main characters look good? How the fuck does that make sense? Like where is my Haizaki redemption arc? Do I have to write it on my own? I will write it. I am writing one.

Haizaki is the only character I could relate to. Being second best, struggling to find somewhere to fit in and overshadowed and replaced by someone everyone thinks is better than you. It's fucking depressing, okay? You spend your whole life thinking you’re not good enough, and it hurts. I don't feel like going too deep into it because I don't owe you a detailed explanation of my trauma, okay?. So I'll save that for my fics where I self-project half of it onto Haizaki. It’s a coping mechanism, okay? Therapy is fucking expensive.

The anime ruined his whole character, got rid of his whole arc and shorted it down, and made him worse than he really is.

A post explaining how the anime did him dirty and goes more in-depth about his character

I am not trying to justify his actions, i.e. him manhandling Alex and beating Himura up. He does terrible shit. We all do lousy shit sometimes, but that doesn't make us bad people. Making mistakes is a part of being human, and we're supposed to hold people accountable for their actions and help them realize what they’re doing is wrong, allowing them to grow and change. Not condemn them and ostracize them, which leads to isolation and a lot of psychological trauma and self-hatred, and as someone who has dealt with—is still dealing with all three. It is not fun. It makes living painful. Highly unrecommended.

Haizaki does not have a positive role model in his life nor anybody he can turn to, everyone has already given up on him. Even Nijimura and Kuroko didn’t even try to help him, being more focused on the Miracles. (Yes, I know kuroko tried to stop him from throwing his basketball shoes away, but that doesn’t fucking count because after that Kuroko just gave up on Haiazki too). Haizaki has probably grown grew up knowing only violence and not a single ounce of kindness, turning him into the bitter and angry little boy he is.

Haizaki had so much potential. But instead of making him a great villain that potential was WASTED on fucking Kise.

Also, the Kaijo vs Seirin match in the winter cup was completely useless because Kise already got redeemed and he literally got no character development from it.

And Seirin was gonna fucking win anyways because duh thier the main characters. 🙄

Now some headcanons I think about a lot:

1. He gets abused. Some psychological behavioural consequences of child abuse are unhealthy sexual practices and juvenile delinquency, and Haizaki exhibits all three which are some external behaviours of most (NOT ALL) male abuse victims. Haizaki's a womanizer, aggressive, hostile and violent. Yet, he backs down when someone stronger than him comes around and puts him in his place i.e. Aomine and Nijimura.

a factsheet explaining the long term consequences of child abuse and neglect

How to help a friend dealing with family abuse or neglect

How to Handle Abuse

2. He's a victim. And when you're a victim, you either become angry and cynical with everything and everyone around you, swearing never to be a victim again and struggle with gaining back control of your life. Not wanting anyone to see you being vulnerable because being vulnerable makes you weak. Being weak makes you shatter. You always shatter like glass, cutting yourself every time you pick up broken pieces, watching as blood trickles through your fingers.

Your body is constantly on high alert. The default is flight or fight—survival to the fittest.

Or you bite your lip and keep your head down, bottling everything inside and looking for escapes or seeking validation. You want to be wanted and loved because you struggle with loving and accepting yourself. There's always a voice in the back of your head telling you, you're not good enough or that it's your fault. That everything is your fault. Self-hatred and self-doubt are your tormentors.

Or it's a combination between both—a constant struggle.

And I believe Haizaki portrays both from the way he acts and presents himself. Especially since his motto is literally "Survival of the fittest,” and he had once told Kuroko, " there are bad guys and then the really scary people," or something along those lines, which I believe he is talking from experience. You learn from your experiences. They either make you or break you.

3. He's touch-starved.

What Does It Mean to Be Touch Starved?

4. He's bisexual and has a lot of internalized homophobia. I can just feel his internalized homophobia rolling off of him. Bruh, I just know cuz I am bisexual, and I have struggled with internalized homophobia and still sadly struggle with it cuz I grew up surrounded by homophobic people.

I still live with them. 😭

Also, we live in a society that thinks straight is the default.

What internalized homophobia is.

5. His sexual awakening was probably Aomine or Kise. Could be both 😂?

6. He cries himself to sleep every night.

7. He's observant and a great judge of character. It's a fact. This guy literally predicted the downfall of the Miracles. Straight up warned Kuroko too. Too bad Kuroko didn't listen to him.

8. He's hilarious. When he first appeared in the manga, he literally called Himura a loser, lol. XD

9. He's a closeted softie and a total tsundere.

10. doesn't know how to react to kindness and will think you're threatening him or will feel really awkward and uncomfortable but will cover it up with his scowl, or he'll have a breakdown.

11. needs a lot of reassurance and head pats

12. swears a lot. Has no filter.

13. His bother is in the yakuza or some high position of power, and he feels inferior to him. It also explains why Haizaki gets away with things because he would have been kicked out of school if his bother wasn't either-or. I'm talking about his bother being in the yakuza, lol. XD

14. He and Momoi dated for a while but broke up on a mutual understanding that thier relationship just didn't work out. They're best friends and hang out sometimes.

15. Haizaki's good with kids and just genuinely likes them. He would be a great father and try his best to raise his kids right.

16. He gets sick really easily

17. He's clingy

18. He has no friends, mainly because he doesn't want people to get close to him because he's afraid of getting hurt again. Also, everyone in knb hates him.

19. He watches cartoons cuz he was never allowed to watch them when he was a kid. His childhood is trash, okay?

20. He hides in the closet because that's where he feels safe the most—rhetorically and literally.

21. Sleep-deprived and only runs on caffeine and spite.

List of fics that portray Haizaki better than the anime:

Heavy is the head by extrastellar

Idle Hands by DarkWoods

Another Chance by regretting my username_ (777imou_offline367)

What Matters is that We're Together by StrawFairy

06:00:00 of Haizaki Shougo (4) by ReiClien

This Is Happening by SharkGirl

What is Love by voices_in_my_head

A completely uncalled catharsis by oddball

One-shots

intertwined, under a spell by kornevable

ԼƠƔƐ & ӇΛƬƐ by Arthuria_PenDragon

delirium by extrastellar

me with you by doublejoint

Turn My Camera On by wordsliketeeth

At Summer's End by doublejoint

Taste by Hibari1_san

I Can't Get Enough of You by HisDarkSecret

I don't care if it hurts by llowsywriter

Ashes by doublejoint

broken things by lowsywriter

Series:

Finally found each other by suzakukills

This Is Happening Universe by SharkGirl

DNA by flowerway

My WIPS:

Isn’t it lovely?

Broken Crown

Love me, Love me, Love me

Grey skies

Rabbit hole

A playlist of songs that I believe fit Haizaki

Kuroko’s basketball’s manga

In conclusion, You can hate Haizaki as much as you want. But just keep it to yourself. Haizaki is my baby and I will protect him with my life.