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thatfrailsoul · 3 days ago

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– And I don't want your pity, I just want somebody near me

Divinatory jukebox : "Nobody", by Mitski

tarot pick a pile reading → one, two, three

It really does feel like gambling. The people, the connections, the bonds between us. The search for the right moments, right ways, right rhythms… that takes all the attention, all the feelings, leaving the bits of relationships that we manage to create to be just a mirage. A fever dream we go through with so many complications, anxiety, doubts and fears. Rushing us to the ending, to those cold goodbyes full of tears. And the only thing remaining is to wonder. Did we really experience it? Was it really possible for something like this to happen to begin with? And will this fate chase us down again, forcing us to relive it?

Connections are never easy to begin with. There are too many details and requirements, too much of that complex and at times frustrating humanity in them. Too many to make it work as easily… But we don't help ourselves either. Our mind, our judgement, our anger and frustration that are so easily thrown right back at us, at our own actions and decisions. The answers and explanations that we don't want to hear. The feelings that we don't want to feel because of the fear that it will make it all too real…

This reading is that one message that you are not reading, pretending that you never received it. That truth, that motive or the explanation, that you don't want to make yours. Something that you need to accept, to keep in mind, to learn or do… Something that this world is trying to tell you, with your whole castle of walls around you, hoping that you will allow it to come through. Hoping that you will take a moment to stay in silence and breathe. Listening to your inner voice, that will guide you to that one pile that hides your message in it.

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P.s. A little question for you ♡

– Pile One,

the clouds: the queen of cups and the knight of wands

picture from → pinterest

Your way of feeling, of loving… of showing it, never was the problem. It never depended on how much you changed for someone, or how much you embraced your own true self. It never was important that you did it for them, how you did it, even if they claimed that it was everything. It never really made any difference, not when all that you did and tried was something that they expected from someone else... Yes, every single one of them.

Every person, every relationship, every connection that faded right before your eyes... They said they wanted it all from you, not realising that they needed it from themselves. Because we do project, we do confuse the things, we do misunderstand the reason behind what we feel. And we almost never admit it, never think that it is only something ours. We cry at what we don't receive from others, what we don't find, what we don't feel. But in reality is at us that we are screaming, not understanding how is it possible that someone that is supposed to genuinely and unconditionally love us, can’t simply make us feel safe and enough within, to the point that we need to seek it in others, begging for it…

But, ironically enough, this story is not about you. You were only the witness of it, again and again, so many times in all these years. You were the person that was used as a mirror, condemned to listen to so many tones in their voices, to see so many contrasting emotions on their faces, thinking that they were looking at you, but not realising that they weren't really seeing you, that they weren't talking to you.

And amidst all of it, you hid yourself. You closed up. Seeking that moment of silence and apparent calm, that space to reflect and think. You tried to understand, to really listen to all those words that are still right here in your mind, hurting you every time you thought you forgot them. You looked for that truth, for that explanation on what you really did wrong, how it could've happen so many times, in so many different situations, with so many different people across the time. But you never found it. So, in doubt, you just chose to never really come back. To not expose your apparently dangerous self to all those innocent souls. To not express your feelings, not through actions nor words, just to not burden them all. Those poor ones that might be forced to endure your wrong type of love.

But it is ridiculous. You don't have so much power over others. No one has such power, except when it is used on our own selves. You can’t be possibly the reason of every disgrace or conflict. And you know it. You are just not able to remind it to yourself, being under all the garbage of their own internal problems that they throw at you without any shame.

It is indeed a too much of a coincidence that it happened so many times with so many different people. But you are not the one that connects them. Or to be exact, not in a way that you convinced yourself you do.

Your love, your ways, just who you are, are not the ones to cause so much distress and pain, you are not the one to broke them down, to destroy their walls and stab them. You are just someone who has a gentle and tender enough way to make them all feel safe. Safe to get closer. Safe to trust. Safe to open up more and more, without realising that all that they were ignoring and bottling down up until now, will simply explode, reversing all their anger on those that are with them, on those that care and want to help them.

You are just that kind, that understanding and patient. Enough to assure others that you won't allow anyone to hurt them so much. That you won’t allow even your own hands to scratch them, always ready to correct yourself and change just to protect their heart. But you can’t always do it. You can’t heal the wounds that they themselves are opening up. You can’t find a cure for an illness that they themselves aren't aware of where it is coming from. You can’t understand it yourself, and then make them understand that you are not the one that they are resenting so much. Not when you both are so resilient in not accepting it.

It is a heavy fate, the one of making others feel so accepted and safe that they don't hold anything back, not even things that have nothing to do with you and what you can make work… But it is not a reason to hide yourself. To keep you in the shadows, never again crossing other paths. It is not your fault that you love strongly and sincerely enough to make others want to escape their traumas, their pains and fears, just for a chance to feel and see this world the same way you did. And it is not your responsibility, the fact that they don't know how to control it, how to sort all of it, once it crashes down upon them.

The only thing you do is love. In all the ways and forms. All you do is being caring, understanding, open… So why would you change it when they see it as something else, as too much or not enough, just because it is different from the love they got used to? Let them go, let them pass by, if they can’t feel satisfied, if they want more as soon as you are willing to give them what others never wanted. But don't do so convinced of the fact that there won’t be someone that will see in you enough. Someone that would feel the same and express it in the same way. Someone that will find you, as soon as you make a step out of the punishment of loneliness that you put yourself in.

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– Pile Two,

the birds: the king of cups and the two of cups

picture from → pinterest

You crave them, those feelings. The understanding, the acceptance, the complicity, the intimacy… And yet you force yourself to stop before, every single time you catch a glimpse of it, of the possibility to have it.

Can it be called self sabotage? Self defence? Trauma? Perhaps. But at its core is only the uncertainty of what it will lead to. The wander about whether you will truly find someone that understands you, if they will be really so aligned with you like it seems to? If their thoughts will follow the same flow of energy… Or if their mask of appearance will come down, revealing a wolf in the sheep’s skin, ready to devour you and your every feeling.

It just seems to you like a promise of a heartbreak, long before even connecting. All the time spent together, the little moments that were created, every shy way to get to know each other better… only for them to become someone you need to escape from. It doesn't seem worth it, it doesn't seem safe. It feels just like another losing game destined to leave you feeling played.

But… what else can be a stronger protective or revealing spell than our own words? What else can really shows us who we are and who is standing in front of us? What can be powerful and intimate enough to guide us right to others people core, to their soul, overcoming every obstacle they put in front just to protect themselves from others? And how else someone could ever find us, recognise us, without never listening to the voice of our heart, without seeing what our mind hides?

It is a risk, it is a long and intimidating chess game. But it is not at all worthless, not when it gives you a chance to know your opponent. Perhaps discovering that they are not playing to make you lose in your battle, but only to have a chance to be beside you, to get close to you, through a dance of lunges and parries, until one of you loses all the armour and weapons, remaining vulnerable in front of the other… and seeing in their gaze only admiration and the desire to hold your hand to help you get up stronger.

You are protecting yourself, hiding, making silent and fast steps in the shadows, hoping that no one will notice you, no one will reach out for you and pull you right under the painfully strong and inquisitive light. But while containing your breath, feeling that you only want to come back to your own safe bubble... you also, sometimes, slow down and stutter. When you see someone so bright that it is impossible to not cling to them with your eyes. Someone with a voice so sweet, a laughter so genuinely joyful and free, that you keep hearing them inside your mind for days to come, unable to forget what it sounded like. Someone so caring, so gentle and delicate in their ways, that you can't help but observe them from your hiding spot, admiring them like an angel that somehow survived amidst these mean and angry souls. You still do it, even if you tell yourself that it doesn't matter, that it doesn't mean anything because you will never again come out and get closer to them. You still do it, even if later you tell yourself that it was probably all false, a well played role in this life’s theatre. You still admire them, the people. Their ways, their character, their interests. You still feel that desire to come closer, to see their eyes and the whole universes inside them.

So why don't you just do it? Why don't you let yourself free from this cage that you put yourself in, convinced that it would protect you? Why don't you just connect, not for the future, not for a chance, not for the outcome… but only for that single moment? Because connection is not only about the bonds we create, the relationships that we later have. It is not only about if one thing was true or a lie, a promise or a betrayal to our heart. It is also that one moment, that one second, in which you feel that admiration, that excitement, that desire for more. It is that complicity, those smiles, those bright and joyful eyes. It is that interest, or attraction, or even playfulness caused by all the outcomes that those moments can create and make possible now, make them real.

You are not only protecting yourself from the worst, the most dangerous, the most painful moments… but from those that can make you feel safe and whole too. Those that could teach you, inspire you, guide you. Those that could bring those emotions and colours to a life that is now becoming a little too silent, too heavy in the emptiness they are forcing on your heart.

Make that step forward, allow others to see you, to hear you. Allow them to get to know you as you connect with them. Not just for those relationships that you could create and that already overwhelm your mind with all the things you should fear and worry about… But for you two. Those versions of you and them in this exact moment, so innocent and genuine. That don't have any fault. That didn't yet do anything bad, if not feeling called by another soul.

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– Pile Three,

the birds: the eight of coins and the seven of wands

picture from → pinterest

You welcomed them in. Every single one of them. So many souls that you courageously connected with. So many minds that you genuinely understood. So many hearts that you devotedly took care of… No matter what it took, no matter how difficult at times it was. How often you felt torn apart, consumed, by their lives and stories, remaining with so little patience, strength and courage to take care of yourself, of your days and journeys…

There wasn't anything that was too hard, too much to do for them. There wasn't anyone that didn't deserve more attention, more patience, even as you were bleeding because of them. It felt as normal and necessary as breathing, to take care of them, to defend them… even from your own self, when their voices raised in accusation of your love being too suffocating, your desire to help and care, too much.

One after another they changed their mind, their appreciation, their gratefulness for what you did for them, for your way to be and care… And from being cherished and known as someone who is just so caring and loving, one day, you became someone who no one wanted anymore, not so close to them.

They knew better, they were doing everything right, and your suggestions or worries weren't anymore so needed, they became advices no one asked and apprehension no one wanted to be the focus of. They all became mature, independent, and strong enough to face this world on their own. Forgetting thanks to whom they were able to grow and learn so much, who was there by their side every time they'd fall, even if it was difficult for your own self to stand tall as you were holding them.

And while you couldn't force yourself to be angry at their confidence and growth, you also couldn't ignore the fact that it wasn't only this, there was annoyance and resentment too… for the aspects and ways of you that they used to love, choose and look up at you for. And for a heart that is genuine as yours, who can’t and doesn't want to see the bad in those that you love… it is simply confusing. A change so sudden in their behaviour and preference for you and who you are supposed to be. And so many of their voices, of whom used to beg for you to be more closer, that now ask you with anger and frustration why you are here, so ever present?

You can't understand it unless you are in their mind. And they won't tell you what happened either… Because for them the only one to change was you, now that all that they asked for became too much and not anymore needed for them. So you took a step back. Became more silent, more reserved. Not because you wanted to, because you were shy or afraid of being more… But simply because it seemed what all of them wanted. A connection that is only superficial, without any bits of true bond in it, more distanced, more cold. And, just to be sure, you did the same with others too, those that still didn't had a chance to get to see more of you, receive your attention and love, and now will never do. Because you can’t know if they will truly appreciate you or if, apparently, they'll only use you.

But is it really the right thing to do, the right solution? The one to condemn and treat someone coldly, because of another person that actually deserved it? Is it right to ignore those that want to be closer, just because someone else once didn't stay longer? To don't help those that feel so lost and confused, even when every inch of your soul wants to hold them tightly and show them how to go through it?

You are compassionate, you are gentle, you are caring. You want and need to be this way genuinely, without any expectation for others. You are that kind of person that is healing this world, taking care of it, helping us grow with your love and knowledge and experience. And yet you are forcing yourself to become like others, colder, distanced, not interested in what someone feels or goes through. You are trying to change your character, the way you are, the things that you are devoted to and your morals… And because of what? Some people that got up so easily thanks to your support to think that they made it on their own. So naively, like a child who is rushing to show you how well they go on that bike, not seeing that hand that safely holds them.

They might not realise it now. They might continue to think like this for a really long time. But sooner or later they will look back and see all that you did for them, silently thanking you, hoping once again for your forgiveness. But in the meantime, you didn't do it only to have that back, didn't you? You were this way with them because this is who you are, not for them to appreciate it. So why stop being you because of those few? Why putting on pause who you are, not allowing yourself to be this way with anyone else, until those specific people realise their mistakes?

Be you. Be true. Be open and honest. Unlimited in the way you love and care, in the way you truly engage with others. Don't change yourself. Don't try to be someone else who you are not, don't present yourself to new souls this way, because you are much more. And there are so many people who will appreciate your ways and understand their worth.

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deception-united · 3 days ago

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Hi,

I'm rewriting an one-shot with OCs. They are both women in their late teen years, early twenties. A fancies B in a slightly obsessive way, and B is going to get married, so they don't get together at all. I thought about how should I write it being angsty, on A's pov, without ending up boring or whiny.

Have a great day/night :)

Hi, thanks for asking!

Writing Unrequited Love

This is a classic trope with a lot of emotional tension involved, but there's a fine line that falls between deeply evocative storytelling and a protagonist who comes across as melodramatic or pitiful; so, when writing from the POV of a character (A) who obsessively fancies another (B)—who is about to marry someone else—you want to capture the intensity of their emotions without exhausting the reader with endless self-pity. Here are some tips!

1. Make the obsession feel real, but not over-explained.

A’s feelings, albeit visceral, would be better woven into the narrative through sensory detail and subtext rather than outright declarations. Instead of repeating things like, "She loved B more than anything. It hurt. It wasn't fair," try showing the longing through her reactions—things like stolen glances, hesitations, or memorising B's habits as if hoarding the last pieces of her. Examples:

The way A's stomach tightens when B laughs at her fiancé’s joke.

The way A’s hand twitches, itching to reach out, when B absentmindedly brushes a lock of hair behind her ear.

The way A studies every micro-expression, searching for doubt or regret or anything that says she doesn't want to marry him, either.

2. Resist the urge to rant in internal monologue.

A bit of this is good and can add insight into A's exact thoughts and feelings, but it can be tempting to let her spiral into pages upon pages of why won't she love me back, which can get tedious. It may be more difficult to connect with excessive wallowing, but keeping internal monologues sharp, poignant, and purposeful can keep readers engaged. Include them mainly in moments of heightened emotion, rather than drowning the narrative in a flood of self-pity.

3. Let her have moments of denial and delusion.

A character in unrequited love will likely have fleeting moments where they convince themselves they still have a chance, no matter how irrational. Maybe B holds A’s hand for a second too long, or says something wistful about their past together, and A clings to it like an addict chasing a high. This emotional whiplash between hope and despair can add a lot of depth to her internal conflict throughout the story. Here's an example of how you can depict this in the narrative:

She's sitting on my side of the table. She still looks at me first when something funny happens. Maybe that means something. (hope) Then again, maybe it doesn’t. Maybe I’m just a memory she keeps around for nostalgia’s sake. (reality)

4. You don't have to paint B like an unattainable angel.

It’s easy to write B as a perfect figure—someone A puts on a pedestal. And this may be how you choose to write it, which can make for an interesting story of its own! Maybe she sees B as radiant and untouchable, and every smile she gives someone else feels like a dagger. But it's also important to show B's flaws as well (though this may not work as well in a one-shot with only one POV). Maybe she’s oblivious to A’s pain, leads A on unintentionally, or is struggling with her own uncertainties. This adds more complexity: A isn’t just losing something; she’s also struggling with the fact that B chose someone else over her.

More tips and things to consider:

Suppressed emotion: let A's emotions simmer beneath the surface and show her turmoil through the little things, like a lingering glance or a hand that hesitates before letting go.

Instead of drowning the reader in raw, explicit yearning, let them feel the gaps. Make A's world feel off-kilter, distorted by B’s impending marriage. Maybe the wedding preparations invade her senses—the clink of glasses, the rustle of silk, the scent of flowers that now feel sickly sweet.

Self-delusion: give A moments of near-normalcy, where she's pretending to be fine and almost manages to be—until something tiny unravels her again.

How does A cope? Does she act out in small, destructive ways, grow distant and quiet, or lean in, helping with the wedding like it's some self-inflicted punishment?

---

Unrequited love rarely gets neat closure, which is what makes it so miserable. Maybe A finally accepts the loss, or maybe she doesn’t—but keep in mind that angst isn't just about drowning the reader in sadness, but about making them feel the weight of what's lost.

Hope this helped ❤

#ask #writeblr #writing #writing tips #writing advice #writing help #writing resources #creative writing #character writing #deception-united

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iamyouknow-yours · 18 hours ago

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My first therapist participated in medical gaslighting - ie insinuating I was not autistic and that I was "just anxious" and not in fact chronically ill. Turns out I'm both. This fucked me up for years (still fucks me up tbh) and it delayed my diagnoses that could have radically changed my life. It also encouraged my mom and family to participate in said medical gaslighting and force me to go to school (which was actively harmful and traumatising for me and my sense of self worth).

I really like my current therapist. A lot. She is incredibly helpful. She's knowledgeable about autism and chronic illness and disability. She also actually listens to me and takes my feedback and just really gets me.

But goddamn if my choices were no therapy or my first therapist? No therapy all the fucking way baby!

My second therapist was also pretty shit and actively made my relationship with my mom worse.

So yeah jeez, therapists are still human beings who can be extremely biased and complex. And they are in a position of power over you where you make yourself vulnerable. So you really gotta make sure you trust them and that they have your best interests at heart and that they're not abusing their power (even unknowingly, like I don't think my first therapists were thinking mwahaha let me fuck up this patient, they just had extreme biases and blind spots and were ignorant about a lot of things).

Also!! There are different types of therapy. CBT is one of the most common types of therapy and it is really effective for a lot of people. But for others (especially neurodivergent people), it can be harmful. There are lots of types of therapy and not all of them work for everyone.

An incomplete list of things in no particular order that help me alongside therapy and alongside each other, all of them have pros and cons and fall short in some areas (also I'm still chronically disabled, none of it cured me, sorry)

Psych meds (there are so many types out there, I'm on 3)

Online chronic illness group chat support group

A good support system (excellent, weird friends - it's really important to be friends with weirdos, it's good for you, I'm a weirdo too) (also my mom <3)

Accommodations (mobility aids, stuff at uni like extra time, all that jazz)

An OT who specialises in chronic illness and neurodivergency

A dietitian who specialises in neurodivergency and has learned about my chronic illnesses for me

Having hobbies - create stuff, it's good for you. It's okay if you don't keep the same hobby after a few months. Just keep doing stuff.

Exercise (yeah I know but unfortunately doing some stretching and going for a walk with my dog does actually help my mental and physical health, does not cure me though shut up Barbara)

Meds n shit for physical stuff

Animals - having pets, I recommend, it's like touching grass but woah they're in your bed

Drinking enough water and eating regularly (again I know, it's not gonna fix you but dear lord I feel like shit when I don't do these things, and yes sometimes it's really fucking hard)

Journalling

A truly fantastic GP/managing doctor (I cannot state how much I adore her, she's so lovely and believes me and listens to me and just excellent)

Learning how to rest properly - did you know there are different types of energy and different types of rest? Obvious right but I was only resting my body and now I'm learning to rest my brain and get emotional rest and social rejuvenation and be in nature and have a sense of community - these are all important!!

Reminders (so many reminders) and google calendar (I know google sucks, give me a good alternative and I'll use it) and Shovel (I got it when it was cheaper, it's a planning app for adhd people that I can't live without for uni)

Media I enjoy - fics, youtubers, shows, movies

Leaving the house for fun reasons as much as I can (uni, errands, and appointments don't count, walking the dog half counts, but I need to leave and go to an event or cafe or go to a friend's house) (this ends up being not as often as I'd like but it's important to me)

Getting enough sleep (one of my psych meds has the truly fantastic side effect of making me sleep well practically every night. I can't state enough how much this is fantastic. Did not cure me though, don't worry, your aunt wasn't correct)

I have gotten quite a few asks which can be summarized as "my therapist doesn't believe me and keeps blaming me for my problems, but I know I have to stick with therapy if I want to get better-", and I need everyone to realize that therapy isn't inherently good and effective, nor is it always necessary for getting better. Having a bad therapist can actually be more harmful to your recovery than not having one! If your therapist makes you worse or doesn't help you, it's okay to walk away, whether to find a new one or to find healing in something else. You are in fact not morally obligated to see a therapist just because you're mentally ill.

#disability

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maxdibert · 3 days ago

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My problem with Lily and James being seen as a super couple has nothing to do with Severus Snape but rather with the fact that when we look at the relationship between James and Lily through a feminist lens, it’s hard not to notice some pretty glaring issues that go beyond just whether or not they’re an “OTP” couple. Sure, on the surface it might seem like a story of two people finding love amid all the chaos, but scratch beneath the surface and you see a whole lot more about toxic masculinity, objectification, and the erasure of a woman’s agency. James is celebrated as this charming, rebellious “bad boy” with a roguish smile, while Lily gets stuck playing the role of the sacrificial, moral compass woman—someone who exists largely to balance out and even redeem the male narrative. And honestly, that’s a problem.

James is shown as this complex, active character who’s constantly surrounded by friends, enemies, and drama. His life is dynamic and full of choices—even if those choices sometimes involve manipulation and deceit. He’s the kind of guy who can easily slip out of confinement with his Invisibility Cloak, leaving Lily behind in a narrative that, over time, turns her into a background figure. This dynamic isn’t accidental; it’s reflective of how our culture often values male agency over female independence. Lily, on the other hand, is repeatedly reduced to her relationships with the men around her. Instead of being a person with her own dreams, opinions, and friendships, she becomes a symbol—a kind of emotional barometer for how “good” or “bad” a man is. Her character is used to validate the actions of others, which means her individuality gets smothered under the weight of a trope that’s all too common in literature: the idea that a woman’s worth is measured by her ability to tame or save a troubled man.

This isn’t just about a lack of depth in Lily’s character; it’s also about how her portrayal reinforces harmful gender norms. Lily is depicted as this kind of sacrificial mother figure—a person whose primary virtue is her selflessness, her willingness to suffer and sacrifice for the sake of others. While selflessness is often celebrated in women, it’s a double-edged sword when that selflessness is the only thing we see. Instead of having her own narrative, her role is defined by how much she gives up, not by what she contributes or the inner life she leads. And it’s not just a narrative oversight—it’s a reflection of a broader cultural pattern where women are expected to be nurturing, supportive, and ultimately secondary to the male characters who drive the action.

What’s even more frustrating is how Lily’s isolation is used to further the narrative of James’s redemption. Over time, we see Lily’s network of friends and her connections outside of James gradually disappear. It’s almost as if, once she falls in love, her entire world is meant to shrink around that relationship. And here’s where the feminist critique really kicks in: this isn’t a realistic depiction of a balanced, healthy relationship—it’s a story that subtly suggests that a woman’s fulfillment comes from being dependent on one man and his circle, rather than cultivating her own identity. Meanwhile, James continues to be portrayed as this larger-than-life figure who’s got a whole world beyond his romantic entanglement, a world filled with vibrant interactions, rivalries, and a legacy that extends beyond his relationship with Lily.

Another point worth mentioning is the way in which the narrative seems to excuse James’s less-than-stellar behavior. His manipulation, his lying, and his willingness to trick Lily into situations that serve his own interests are brushed off as quirks of a “bad boy” persona—a kind of charm that, in the end, makes him redeemable because Lily’s love is supposed to “tame” him. This kind of storytelling not only normalizes toxic masculinity but also puts an unfair burden on Lily. It’s like saying, “Look how amazing you are, you’re the only one who can fix him!” That’s a dangerous message because it implies that women are responsible for managing or even reforming male behavior, rather than holding men accountable for their own actions.

The imbalance in their character development is glaringly obvious when you compare how much more we learn about James versus how little we know about Lily. James is given room to be flawed, to grow, and to be complicated. His friendships, his rivalries, and even his mistakes are all part of what makes him a rounded character. Lily, however, is often just a name, a face in the background who exists mainly to serve as a counterpoint to James’s narrative. Her inner life, her ambitions, and her struggles are rarely explored in any meaningful way, leaving her as a one-dimensional character whose only real purpose is to highlight the moral journey of the man she loves.

It’s also important to recognize how this kind of narrative plays into broader cultural ideas about gender. When literature consistently portrays women as the quiet, isolated figures who are only valuable in relation to the men around them, it sends a message about what is expected of real-life women. It suggests that a woman’s worth is determined by how much she sacrifices or how well she can support a man, rather than by her own achievements or personality. This isn’t just a harmless trope—it contributes to a societal mindset that limits women’s potential and reinforces gender inequality. The way Lily is written reflects a kind of “tamed” femininity that’s supposed to be passive, supportive, and ultimately secondary to the active, adventurous masculinity that James represents.

At the heart of the issue is the lack of balance in their relationship as depicted in the texts. The idea that Lily “fell for” a man who was clearly not a paragon of virtue is problematic, but what’s even more problematic is how her role in the relationship is so narrowly defined. Rather than being seen as an independent character who makes choices and has her own voice, she is constantly portrayed as someone whose existence is meant to validate the male experience. Even when the texts mention that Lily had her own issues—like hating James at times or suffering because of the way their relationship unfolded—it’s always in a way that underlines her weakness compared to James’s dynamic, active presence.

Looking at the broader picture, it’s clear that this isn’t just about one fictional couple—it’s a reflection of how gender dynamics have long been skewed in literature. Male characters are given the freedom to be complex, flawed, and full of life, while female characters are often stuck in roles that don’t allow them to be fully realized. This isn’t to say that every story with a sacrificial female character is inherently bad, but it does mean that when a character like Lily is reduced to a mere symbol—a moral compass or a measure of male worth—it’s time to ask why and what that says about the society that produced that narrative.

So, what’s the way forward? For one, we need to start reimagining these relationships in a way that allows both partners to be fully fleshed out. Lily deserves to be more than just a side character or a moral benchmark; she should have her own narrative, her own dreams, and her own agency. And as much as it might be appealing to think of James as this redeemable rebel, it’s equally important to hold him accountable for the ways in which his behavior perpetuates harmful stereotypes about masculinity. A healthier narrative would be one in which both characters grow together, where mutual respect and equal agency are at the core of their relationship.

In the end, the story of James and Lily, as it stands, is a reminder of how deeply ingrained gender norms can shape the stories we tell. It’s a cautionary tale about the dangers of allowing toxic masculinity to go unchecked and of confining women to roles that don’t do justice to their full humanity. For anyone who’s ever felt frustrated by these imbalances, there’s hope in the idea of re-writing these narratives—of pushing for stories where both men and women are seen as complete, complex individuals. And really, that’s what literature should strive for: a reflection of the messy, beautiful, and often complicated reality of human relationships, where no one is just there to serve as a prop in someone else’s story.

Ultimately, if we can start imagining a world where characters like Lily aren’t just defined by their relationships to men, where their voices and stories are given as much weight as those of their male counterparts, then we can begin to chip away at the outdated tropes that have held us back for so long. It’s about time we celebrated the full spectrum of human experience—and that means giving women like Lily the space to shine on their own terms, without being constantly overshadowed by a “bad boy” narrative that has little to say about their true selves.

#james potter #lily evans #lily evans potter #lily potter #james and lily #james x lily #jily #women in media #feminist analysis #gender analysis #female characters #female characters in media

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mangionebabymama · 17 hours ago

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A bit off topic but I wanted to say this: I find intelligence so sexy, Luigi is not only physically attractive but also he’s very intelligent and educated c: I just thought of this because last night I was speaking with one of my classmates and we talked about politics and he did not know the difference between left and right, we’re in our junior year in college jajaj I got an immediate ick

All of this. I'll admit—the first time I ever saw the two photos of him when it was announced that he was named as the suspect (the one of him hiking in Hawaii and he's ripped and then the photo of him in the suit), I thought he was quite nice-looking. I say this because I'm not someone who, when I see the opposite gender, immediately decides if I am attracted to them or not. It's not always the case, but he caught my eye.

But then once I started diving deeper into more about his digital footprint, including his Reddit posts and even some of his GoodReads reviews, and even some of the things that he retweeted about on his Twitter—I know at the end of the day, people may call me parasocial or just a simp but, when I say this, I genuinely mean that I would love to sit down and talk to him about life, like anything. About his major, why he went into comp sci, the struggles of being an honors student/good student and still struggling with maintaining grades and having identity crises, us growing up in the same metro area of DC and Maryland, travelling, the complexity of intelligence and all the different forms. For me, I admire his intelligence so much because he seems to be the type of person with whom you could really talk about anything and everything and have a substantial conversation; it appears that he knows how to engage in conservation with people and talk to not only talk, but to learn from another person, too. I may be just an old soul, as I've been told this all my life, but I feel that even being Gen Z, sometimes, I have a hard time relating and speaking with people around my age by having experiences and being "older" beyond my years. But knowing he's literally around my age (he's three years older) and constantly loves to learn more about new things and seems quite interested in a wide variety of things?????? I'm WHIPPED

But, bestie, I would be getting the super ick, too, my god

#mangionebabymama asks

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wherearedagrapes · 1 day ago

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Man, we have almost the exact same ideas about Amy! That’s crazy Haha! She’s been one of my favorite Sonic characters since I first played (I think it was) Sonic Adventure 2 as a little kid? I loved that she was pink and small but brandished this big hammer and big personality. I’m hoping she keeps that, which means, yeah I both want and expect movie Sonic and Amy to have a bit of a rocky start lol But that’ll make the balance they establish later more rewarding.

I also think it’s more interesting than Amy being seen as this, like, perfect dream girl that Sonic spends the movie trying to get with. As cute as the fam giving Sonic dating advice would be, I really need Amy to be complex and kind of a pain like the other characters. I want her to challenge Sonic (and vice versa). I want them to learn from each other, to grow because of each other. Since that’s been the case with all the characters introduced in the movies thus far, I’m not too worried. But, you know, there’s always going to be a little wariness.

I’m excited to see movie Sonic and Amy’s dynamic as buds beyond that friction as teammates. They’re both playful, high-energy characters that I can see keeping up with each other’s quips and bits and having similar senses of humor. I think they can match each other’s freak in a way their game counterparts don’t exactly lol… Again, the movies have done such a great job with Tom and Maddie that I’m not that worried. Like I constantly think about how we’re introduced to them as a couple — with Maddie having bought two cakes for Tom in case he didn’t get the job in San Fran and pulling out the wrong one by mistake lmao like that’s so funny, and right away it tells us so much about them! But I’m getting sidetracked. Anyway

What you described, Amy being kind of a control freak in the team at first because she’s desperately trying to keep the situation from becoming worse — because she’s so passionate about this, about saving the world — is exactly what I see! Those obsessive traits of hers manifesting from her obsession with this mission, her life’s mission essentially. (Much like Knuckles guarding the Master Emerald) This is her destiny. And in being so obstinate and self-sacrificing, she’s actually sabotaging her chances of success. Yes!!

I didn’t notice the explosion is blue and pink — that’s very interesting… And Ivo being sent to the past instead is totally plausible. I don’t know how I feel about Amy having chaos powers though. Like, okay — I’m not super familiar with Sonic game lore, but having chaos powers is supposed to be rare. Right? In the games, it’s just Shadow. In the movies, I think it’s Shadow and Sonic? And having that power is treated as a very special (and dangerous) thing.

All of the alien characters definitely have heightened abilities. Knuckles also seems to have inherited and learned specific abilities from his tribe. So I can see Amy having some clairvoyance due to her family or culture. But that’s not chaos energy, right? Or is it? Is chaos energy like the Force in Star Wars? Lol I guess I’m curious why you think Amy has chaos powers aside from Metal Sonic creating that pink energy blast.

With Amy coming along, I can't stop thinking about the Amy-Sonic/Tom-Maddie parallels.

You know, the pink and blue scheme, Tom having a similar personality to Sonic and Amy possibly having some similarities to Maddie, Amy and Maddie possibly being two big city girls with Amy being from New York and Maddie from San Francisco while Tom and Sonic are both from Green Hills, the setup of Amy plus 3 Wachowski siblings as well as Maddie and Tom, who canonically have siblings too.

They've been foreshadowing this couple since the second movie, fight me!!

(and Tom x Maddie are the parents and couple ever, I love them!)

(Also, please give Maddie more prominence. She's awesome!)

#the pink may also be a nod to the ova as hyper metal sonic gives off a pink energy streak against sonic #heavy emphasis on the may though #we can continue this discussion in private if you want since this post is getting kind of long 😅#i really want to hear more of your thoughts!#amy rose

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rinajjbp · 1 day ago

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Greasers and their godly parent (Part 1)

When my initial obsession towards The Outsiders began I was also in the height of my Percy Jackson phase.

How ironic is it that in the resurgence of my Outsiders obsession (let’s be honest it never really went away…it was just…a little quieter) I also re-read the Percy Jackson and The Olympians series.

In the midst of it all I of course had the greasers on my mind. Who would their godly parents be? Which cabin do each of them belong? What is their role?

I’ve created mood boards for some of the boys below. I hope that some of you also had a cringey PJO phase in your life so you can enjoy these boards 🤗

Feel free to agree or disagree! I’d love to know your thoughts on who you think their godly ‘rents would be. You can find all my thoughts below the fold.

To begin, the Curtis boys 🌞

It took me a second to figure them out. Individually I could place them, easily.

Ponyboy - Athena

Soda - Aphrodite

Darry - Zues

But for the sake of continuity I wanted them all in the same cabin. Now where in the world could I place them that would cover all of my bases?

Darry: The strong oldest brother. The leader.

Soda: The kind and goofy boy who puts the “middle” in middle brother.

Pony: Our smart, sensitive, poetic little brother.

My solution?

Apollo

Darry - The Archer - Son of Apollo

Darry would be the best archer at Camp Half Blood (perhaps even rivaling auntie Artemis herself). I could also see him being a head counselor of the Apollo cabin leading the rest of his siblings with pride.

Whether it’s in a game of capture the flag, chariot racing, or any other competitive sport at CHB, Darry is striving to be the best.

I imagine it took Apollo awhile for him to claim the Curtis brothers, and it wasn’t until Darry exhibited his mad archery skillz that he finally took notice. It definitely gave Darry a complex…

Soda - The Healer - Son of Apollo

Soda, he gives the best massages, I imagine the best hugs, and loves his brothers fiercely. He is the glue and feels like he has to be the one to bring them back together.

Soda would be a healer. While he’d still have his other interests—for example he’d LOVE the pegasi and they’d love him—healing would just come naturally, whether he liked it or not. It is very draining after all…

Ponyboy - The Poet - Son of Apollo

Ponyboy, our little writer. He would take on the poetic side of Apollo in this universe.

While canonically he is pretty athletic, and I think that’d still be true here, in this universe I could also see him being frustrated with the fact that he just doesn’t excel in the other qualities that come with being a child of Apollo.

He wouldn’t be a great healer like Soda, helping people who needed it, and he wouldn’t be as strong or as great at archery or as good of a leader as Darry. (Hell, Darry had already gone on his first quest by Pony’s age and Pony’s been impatiently waiting for one.) It would take him awhile to accept that his strength is writing and that his words are his weapon.

Okay, this is actually getting HELLA long. I will put the rest of the boys in a separate post! Here’s the link!

#the outsiders #greaser #ponyboy curtis #sodapop curtis #darry curtis #two bit mathews #steve randle #dallas winston #johnny cade #pjo #chb #camp half blood #godly parent #apollo #the curtis brothers #the archer #the healer #the poet

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noxiatoxia · 8 hours ago

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i love komaeda tidbits!!! his valley girl dialect adds so much ahhh... do you recall any particularly funny/notable instances of him speaking like that, or times where other characters comment on it?

I wouldn't go as far as to say it is a valley girl-type accent. 1, because that is just the closest approximate to English (obviously the exact same thing doesn't exist in Japanese) and 2, Komaeda does not use sa and ne nearly enough for it to be those levels...well, in my opinion. I'm sure other people could weigh in on what they think.

Either way he's still stumbling over his words a lot, and I do think that's very charming.

I guess you could make the argument that he does have a valley girl accent by proxy of the fact most other characters don't over-use filler particles as much...like I said in the post, people do it all the time in real life, but in media, characters rarely ever stutter or use filler words (unless it's, like, a super tense situation). So the casual usage, even if it is small, stands out. I guess in that way, you can argue Komaeda has a "noticeable" accent in that regard...but that's very much a topic up for debate.

I'm getting side-tricked, lol.

Anyways, while not related to ne or sa, there is another thing I love that's overlooked, and that's how he uses ってば (tte ba)!

Again, this is a very cute detail. It does not happen often, but I can recall 2 instances where he uses it.

Firstly, let me explain. tte ba in the case I'm talking about is a sentence ender used to express frustration, annoyance, urgency, etc. It can kind of sound like whining, but it's the verbal equivalent of stomping your foot.

What's fun is that this word is predominantly used by women. Men use it too of course, but overwhelmingly it just seems to be a word that girls use.

But Komaeda uses it too!

First instance is in the prologue, where he says it to Hanamura.

ちょっと！花村クンってば！

The English translation is perfectly fine. But to go more in depth, as you recall, earlier in the prologue Komaeda told Hanamura to stop pestering Sonia with sexual advances. Here, Hanamura does it again. So, naturally, Komaeda responds...

Come on, Hanamura-kun! I told you to quit it already!

The tte ba added at the end makes Komaeda sound like he's scolding Hanamura and is very exasperated.

Also, while the sentence literally is just "Hey, Hanamura-kun!" with an irritated edge, using prior context and knowing what tte ba means (kind of serving to be like "I already told you this!" sort of thing) we can make the sentence sound better in English.

Next is in chapter 2.

おーい、日向クンってばー！

This one is extra funny, because おーい (usually just おい, oi) is neutral-leaning-male, while as we've said, tte ba is neutral-leaning-female. That's what I love about Komaeda's dialogue: he mixes together "traditionally" male speech patterns and female speech patterns. While, again, not uncommon in real life, anime is so much different. Scripts and word choice are used to tell you about a character's personality. As such, you usually get characters who speak hyper-masculine or hyper-feminine or deliberately ambiguous. I'd say a character who speaks a clean mix of feminine and masculine is very rare. Although, to be more precise, Komaeda speaks masculine and neutral-leaning-feminine...if that makes sense (I will explain later).

Anyways, again, the English translation is good. Komaeda does sound pretty whiny in this scene.

Heeeey! C'mon, Hinata-kuuun!

Now, for the opposite. Something that gets overlooked is an interesting scene in 2.5.

The subtitles has Komaeda as saying "I've heard enough!" but I disagree with this. Komaeda says 黙れよ！in the dub. This is a very masculine turn of phrase because of the imperative nature of it - something Komaeda, to my knowledge, never uses. Very masculine characters do use it often - like Hinata or Oowada or Kuzuryuu - but not Komaeda.

2.5 is complex enough, but this adds a whole new layer to it...Komaeda has never spoke so roughly before. I think it shows just how emotional he truly was in this scene.

I'd translate this line as:

Just shut the fuck up!

And finally...while not canon per se, it is voiced by Megumi Ogata and is very in-character for Komaeda, so I count it. This cute little voice line she recorded for the Danganronpa x Crash Fever on Halloween. It let's me segue into something.

トリック・オア・トリート！お菓子をくれなきゃイタズラしちゃうぞ...なんてね。

Earlier I said Komaeda speaks masculine + neutral-leaning-feminine, and this probably sounds like gibberish to a lot of people because...what does that even mean?

(Keep in mind I'm speaking for the perspective of anime, where these grammar rules carry exaggerated connotations compared to real life! I am also speaking from the perspective of Tokyo dialect aka standard Japanese.)

Komaeda typically uses these particles: sa, ne, yo.

All of these particles are gender-neutral, but ne can be more feminine depending on the context. For example, Saonji uses ne constantly, and so does Mioda. But characters like Hinata and Souda still use ne because again it's context dependent.

There are feminine particles, such as wa, which Komaeda does not use. It is used by characters like Sonia and Celestia and even Kirigiri, which is surprising considering her stoic image (it's very cute).

Then, there's masculine particles, like zo, ze and na. Characters who use zo are Kuzuryuu, Souda, Hinata, and Owari to name a few. Despite Owari being female, she talks very masculine, which adds to her rough image. Ze is also used by all of those characters, as is na.

Komaeda's choice of pronoun is also mild-mannered. Boku is a polite masculine pronoun. It makes sense for him to use it when speaking casually which he is always seen doing. If he used Watashi - also gender neutral (to a point) - while speaking casually, it would make him seem feminine or like a girl.

However, the vast majority of male characters when speaking casually will use Ore, which is a hyper-masculine pronoun. I have lost count of the amount of characters who use this. Only characters I can remember who use Boku (besides Komaeda and Naegi) are Yamada, Hanamura, and Ishimaru.

And for those three, I think it makes sense - they all have this level of acting polite/wanting to be polite or seen as proper.

Which is why the fact Komaeda/Naegi uses it stands out a little bit with the rest of the cast. Makes them appear more mild. opting to use gender-neutral particles only and a mild-mannered male pronoun for your male character tells you a lot about them, especially when almost every other guy in the same series is talking super masculine.

Okay, back to that video. What's cute about it is how Komaeda switches from talking masculine to feminine on purpose.

Trick or Treat! If you don't gimmie some candy...I'mma pull a trick on ya! ...Joking!

I'm unsure how to word this in a way that sounds "masculine" or "feminine" as that doesn't really exist in English I don't think...but the first half of his sentence, Komaeda uses zo at the end to sound threatening/rough, then the last part, nante-ne, sounds feminine when pitched up at the end there. It definitely makes him sound playful.

I also want to point out...though I use masculine/feminine (as what I've talked about are usually employed by men, hence masculine, or women, hence feminine) it is not a matter of being absolute...for example, dresses are seen as being feminine, but that does not mean a man can't wear a dress and still be a man.

Wow, this post got long...I sure do talk. I hope this answers something at least haha. Thank you for the ask!

#;noxiatalks2ya #;translationtalk #nagito komaeda #dr #danganronpa #sdr2

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ratsplendor · 2 days ago

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so this post was on my dash last night and i woke up still thinking about it. bc i really do feel like we get a lot of internalized homophobia!Wilson, due to the very comphet of it all, but i think there's some really interesting angles you can play with from this perspective, too. & of course end up with some major angst lol.

so. i kind of ended up going on a long ass ramble here. i've stuck it under a readmore for those who're just scrolling. thanks for putting up with me lol

the main thing i'm thinking about is like...the huge, Stacy-left-me-shaped chip on his shoulder. because how many straight guys do you know who have made their breakup this massive personality trait/let it take the blame for their behavior for years afterwards? i know so many! "wife left me, i joined the NRA" type shit.

in this situation you're describing, i think the breakup is a huge part of how this plays out. because: 1. any feelings he has for men after that are just because she fucked him up so bad. and 2. yes, he's upset she left, why wouldn't he be? he certainly wasn't relieved, secretly, that she pulled the trigger, that she gave him an excuse to push her away. he certainly wasn't tired of pretending, especially given his new condition, which makes it harder to mask. that would be crazy.

so he latches on to this post-breakup, miss-her-but-resent-her pattern of behavior because it's an easy cover for whatever else he's feeling, on two separate fronts. and then she comes back. he finds out Wilson is trying to keep them apart and for a split second, he hopes it's because Wilson's jealous, and he hates that he feels that so much that he throws himself back into manic Stacy-mode again, to the point of being party to her marriage nearly breaking up. a guy who breaks up his ex's marriage is definitely straight! right??

i think a lot of the time we get House being portrayed as the one who's settled with himself because he has this air of hedonism about him, and he enjoys being the contrarian/making people uncomfortable, and doesn't appear to care what other people think. but of course, we see that's especially untrue where his father is concerned. in a world where nothing was off limits to House, we'd expect to see him weaponizing the abuse as part of the way he makes people uncomfortable, right? instead, he's so quiet about it that even Wilson doesn't know well enough to not make him go to the funeral. it's a product of a time when certain things belonged behind closed doors. so there are some things that are off limits to House. joking about being gay is one thing, it gets a rise out of people, but he doesn't allow himself the real thing because 1. he's not gay and 2. it's so bound up in the complexity of the first few decades of his life. which he doesn't talk about, not even to make people squirm. most young people start to contend with their sexuality while still living at home...on base housing, where it felt like there were eyes everywhere, and with a father like John House. then, like you said, came the AIDS crisis, and how many tirades do you think John probably went off on? with his son, the doctor, on the phone with him? the voice that told him how to be a man is asking if he's really gonna treat those fags or not. what do you do?

i'll end this by saying, as a kid who grew up with base brats of several types, i've always found it really interesting + sorely underexplored that House is referred to so often just by surname. i know it's a thing among medical folk, too, but undoubtedly, when his father's buddies came around, they were calling him House. hell, i knew kids whose mothers called their fathers by surname. i've always found this interesting because if House didn't choose it, if it's something that just happened organically during med school, did it hurt at first? and if he did choose it, in this case, would it be because it felt like being a man? his father, the model he had for "real" masculinity growing up--would taking up his name in his early adulthood feel like a shortcut to a male ideal that he was so desperately struggling to align with?

thinking about internalised homophobia House. I normally headcanon him as openly bi (but maybe repressed or in denial about being in love with Wilson), but I like the idea of his suggestive gay comments being a cover because he's so far in denial and gay jokes are a way of being like "haha isn't it so ridiculous and subversive to suggest I'm gay? I'm doing this for the shock value because I'm obviously straight", in the same way straight guys think gay jokes are the funniest thing in the world

his homophobic military dad and becoming independent and coming of age in the 1980s and only hearing about gay people during the AIDS crisis left him with some fucked up ideas and attitudes about gay people (and himself. and what it means to be a man)

if Wilson ever tries to confess feelings for House (or if they fall into each other on a drunken night), House would absolutely withdraw, run away, push Wilson away because House isn't gay

House then dating a woman to prove to Wilson (and everyone. and himself) that he's normal and straight

eventually, if he and Wilson start seeing each other, House would rationalise it as "technically homosexual, but not like those other gays". maybe he'd also withdraw in public where anyone could see them, and try to suppress the emotional side of things ("this is just physical, don't be a fag about it")

meanwhile, Wilson is desperately trying to be okay with the scraps of affection he gets from House, but it's killing him. he's not doing well. after pining over House for so long (knowingly? unknowingly? you decide), he didn't think it would feel like this. but maybe this is the best he deserves

#hilson #though i didn't end up going much into that angle lol #house's brand of repression really scares me sometimes when im writing him #house md #i actually have a wip that never went anywhere where house is using his surname intentionally because he finds it funny #to have gay sex where the guys call him by his fathers name #but it needs a lot of work lmao #accursed mutterings

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quibbs126 · 9 hours ago

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You know, I really think there’s merit to be had in a TFA-style dynamic with Optimus and Megatron, with the two as strangers and Megatron being so much older and basically from a completely different Cybertron. Particularly with a corrupt Autobot government

And also if you actually explore their dynamic more, since TFA didn’t really do that

Like they start off as pure enemies, each thinking very lowly of the other, but their continuous conflicts giving them an odd sense of respect for one another, or at least Megatron for Optimus

And then there’s also the juiciness of their completely separate backstories, or more specifically Optimus learning Megatron’s. I think it’d be cool if Megatron had an absolutely horrible backstory, one so terrible it made him want to burn it all down because he saw no other way forward. In part because my faves must suffer, but also with this backstory being at the hands of Autobots or people who would become Autobots. Like maybe some of the leaders, while not directly responsible, did turn their heads in some way and deny responsibility. Like Megatron is a monster, but he is the monster created by the Autobots

And maybe over time, while he never agrees with him, Optimus starts to understand Megatron more, that he’s more than just a creature of pure evil. And maybe in a scenario where Megatron is captured like in Season 3, Optimus finds himself seeking out his advice and words, because while he’s no paragon, he’s the only person who will tell him the truth, because the Autobot command certainly won’t, and he wants to understand it all better; Megatron, the Decepticons, the Autobots, the war, all of it. Both in prison and out of it, Megatron ends up strangely becoming a sort of mentor to Optimus

I don’t think this Megatron would be one that gets a redemption arc. He’s too far gone, even if he has a tragic backstory and he’s more complex than just a cartoon villain (and also I need to remind myself that just because I feel bad for Megs doesn’t mean he should get off scott free, particularly since he was the villain originally). I also think Optimus should be the one to kill him, with Megatron maybe even being happy with this outcome, that Optimus is someone worthy of doing him the honor of death

I may have gone a bit specific, but I think this older, more experienced Megatron should be a way for Optimus to grow as a person; to learn that the world isn’t as black and white as he thought, and to learn to question the establishment he lives by, so that he can see its corruption and work to truly make it better. Because even if this Optimus isn’t the leader of the Autobots in the story, that is what he tends to ultimately become. I think it could be so good, if in the hands of writers willing, and more importantly able, to explore this as a concept more (though mandates can be a bastard, as seen in other shows)

Oh and also, nothing romantic between these two. With this scenario my brain cooked up, I just don’t see a place for it. Give Optimus his own separate love interest if you have to, just not Megatron, let them be platonic in this instance. Could you say this is because I’m not a fan of TFA megop? Sure, but I say this because I realized this is how I feel about TFA Megatron and Optimus; there’s potential I see in their dynamic, I just don’t like when it’s only for romantic reasons. There’s so much more here, that I think can stand to be more interesting than leading to them kissing. Probably true of other iterations but this is where I stand with TFA at least

#sorry about that rant at the end #it was on its own separate post but elaborating on my thoughts made it too similar to what I wanted to say here #so I moved to making this and then just added that bit on #sorry TFA megop fans I just can’t stop with this #I have to understand why I don’t like it #but aside from that I need this setup to come back again it’s really interesting #also double the backstories which I always love #I need me the lore #transformers #transformers animated #megatron #optimus prime #story ideas #personal opinion

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hyukabean · 15 hours ago

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──── wang yixiang (nicholas), crush headcanons (uni!au)

in which nicholas has a crush on you?! ～ warning: (VERY) unedited

nicholas x fem!reader

nico is confused 97% of the time, i’m convinced. from having to switch between three languages just to communicate with everyone in his friend group, to trying to double major in music and engineering (courtesy of his parents, though it’s a compromise he’s willing to make if it means pursuing his passion and appeasing his family), this man’s brain cells are spread thin.

think this face (c ತ,_ತ). and maybe -o- occasionally too.

this particular professor was way too motived for an 8am lecture and also spoke way too quickly for his liking. and we all know nico does *not* like getting up early lmao.

once he noticed you though, twirling your pencil, brows slightly furrowed as you try to decipher what was apparently supposed to be words on the board, he’d wished he’d tried a little harder in the morning.

shyly pushing up his glasses as he tries hard to wipe off the toothpaste stain on his hoodie and seem like he’s not hanging onto your every word as you quietly try to help another international student understand the material.

he can’t quite explain why he’s so interested in you at first, his usually flirty demeanor evaporating alongside any focus he might’ve had.

suddenly his attendance is perfect, despite the schedule conflicting with his internal clock and he’s sitting right at the front next to you and your friends too, how odd.

what’s even stranger is that his grades somehow got worse eventhough he’s there more often now.

his friends are quick to notice, maki in particular. nico does not strike me as a shy person. on the contrary, i think under regular circumstances, he would’ve charmed his way right into your heart but for some reason, he can’t help but think twice about what he wants to say to you.

he wants to be seen as cool and aloof by you, embarrassed at how nervous he feels when he is in your presence you.

maki, who’s quick to connect the dots, plays cupid (everyone say “thank you, maki!”).

“hey you’re y/n, right? mind helping me and my buddy nico out? we’re a little lost on this assignment” and the rest is history.

you befriended the two and a lot of nico’s shyness is (mostly) shed, and replaced with his signature sass and sarcasm, especially once you discover common interests, be it fashion, music, etc.

but even months into your friendship, he help can’t his hands getting slightly clammy around you, heart beating just a little bit faster when you laugh or lean your head against his shoulder.

would 10038272983403% ask you for help on stuff he already knows just so he can stare at you unabashedly.

you and maki tease him for sure, teaming up to get him annoyed at any and all times. and yet he’s never that annoyed at you? (“why tf does she get special treatment and we get lectures?” - juju probably)

you definitely join in on their pick up lines games, except nico can never quite get his words out around you. not in his typical ‘i’m buffering’ kind of way, but more in a ‘wow i actually would steal the moon for you, i’m fucked aren’t i?’ kind of way.

but there are moments he does fluster you, though they’re not as planned (eg, grabbing your waist to move you out of the way, pushing a strand of hair from your face, intense eye contact, etc).

at first glance, he’d be really good at hiding his feelings. but on closer inspection, this boy is so obvious it’s painful.

checking up on you if you mention you need to go to the doctor for an appointment, ordering food to your house randomly, asking you to share your location if you’re staying late at the library and it’s dark out, all under the guise of a platonic relationship.

one of his complexs is that he doesn’t want to be seen as “cute” by you (call me “weno” vibes”). that’s probably the biggest thorn in his side and maybe one of the only reasons he hasn’t properly confessed to you and admitted his feelings.

sure, he loves it when you squish his face and call him generous and thoughtful for thinking of you, and yet part of him feels annoyed. he likes liking you, but hates blushing and fumbling his words infront of you. he wants to show you his cool side, he wants to be dependable, someone you can rely on! “take me seriously, i’m a man” type of thing.

perhaps an unpopular opinion, but, left alone in the context of university and all the pressures, i truly think he’d be an “admire from afar” type of guy 8 times out of 10 (lots of cheesy smiles and quick ‘hello’s), unless divine intervention (most likely in the form of maki) strikes and gives him an in.

once he’s sure of his feelings and knows you’re not taken, i think he’d work hard on trying to prove his merit as a partner to you. a switch flips and suddenly he’s cupping your cheek, brows furrowed, “i know i have a pretty face, but i’m not nearly as cute as you think”.

that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get flustered around you, but his urge to date you is greater than his shyness. if you knew ofc you’d be like “nico you silly goose, i like that you’re cute AND hot. you’re such a doofus~”, but he’s got that emo streak in him idk what to tell you.

all in all, i think he’d be more shy than most would expect and yet, given the right circumstances, very charming and proactive.

nana's notes : my dear anonie you read my mind!! i had a really old outline in my drafts already so once i saw your request i just had to flesh it out immediately lolol. get out of my walls you dork:pp i’m not fully satisfied with how this turned out tbh, but it is what it isssss. as always, thank you for reading!

taglist : open! @lovelyjuju

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delight-angelsbliss · 2 days ago

Note

Hi, this is the same anon who question what not to ask about! Thanks again for the reply, I feel so much more calmer asking knowing that I won't ask for something you not comfortable with!! I just had one thought in my head, how would Metal Sonic react if at one moment he was saved by a reader despite the fact that they are on different sides (I leave it up to you to choose the situation, maybe he will refuse the help or something but I just really will be interested read something like this :] ) and then, for example, the reader needed help!

Precis: metal sonic getting saved by reader and repaying the favor

Warnings: near death experience!!

Notes: oo this is a cute one!! It was really interesting to write and I'm glad you asked me to make this<3 ok but lowkey metal sonic is kinda fascinating, like, does he think or not? I'm fighting every urge in my body to not make reader have magical girl powers grbfxioslwkrnc metal sonic is a silly little thing confirmed by me😛 edit: I thought I'd make the tag lost generally and not only for the valentines posts lol

Metal sonic tag list: @eternallykokomi @francistimefranche

I have talked about how I view metal sonic many times; a robot who's loyal, proving he can destroy his body many times purely out of loyalty, choosing to stay with his maker until his end, the only times he falls in love is when his code shows faulty. His feelings, if he even has any, are a mystery. A huge mystery. What are his thoughts? There are so many questions that race your mind everyday, when you fight, when you stare, when you think of him. It's so much. Metal sonic is so fascinating

Let's say you're on Sonic's side, or maybe even on your own, nonetheless you're found to get into a fight with Metal sonic if you're against Eggman! When a fight did break out, all hell broke loose. There was a lot of damage, but on particular home, the roof fell off, leaving rubble and more falling straight on metal. In an act of your hero complex, or maybe just stupidity, you push (the disaster reference) Metal sonic out of harm's way. The landing was rough, but it wasn't that bad seeing as you landed on metal. Did you just save him? Metal sonic was bewildered, why would you save him? The robot immediately pushes you off and makes a run for it. What ever needed to be done could wait!

That little scene replayed in Metal sonics head over and over, during fighting, while on patrol. Everywhere. The way your panicked voice asked if he was ok, the fearful look in your eyes... It made him feel all warm inside. Maybe he was glitched? Even after virus scans, checkups, system repairs, anything and everything... You wouldn't leave his mind, something inside him bloomed, bloomed into something amazing. So this is love? So this is the love that everyone raves over everywhere he goes? It felt so nice, yet, it hurt knowing he could probably never love you. You didn't even like Eggman for crying out loud! So why should metal sonic like you?

When Metal sonic finally went back into the battlefield, it felt empty, nothing felt right. He could only watch you, think of you, yearn for you. His non existent soul thirsts for your contact after you've left. He knew the clock was ticking, maybe he could never confess? He couldn't even talk, what a silly little thing metal was. When metal sonic entered another mission, he knew there was a high chance of seeing you. It sounded like something made for you, he didn't know whether that was good or bad. When He saw you again, he first noticed how tired you looked. Have you not been getting sleep? Are you doing too much? He felt like he was gonna short circuit from worry. Your fighting was sloppy, your body looked spent and tired from fighting. You should take a break. The evidence of your tiredness showed when you didn't realize how a badnik was about to pounce on you, the eyes looking blood thirsty and out for its prey. Metal sonic knew in the moment he had to do something. Suddenly, when you turn around, you saw metal sonic, his sharp claws full of the oil of the badnik, eyes looking straight at you; lovesick. It's a small way of repaying the favor, maybe, just maybe, he could help a bit more.

#x reader #sonic x reader #x gender neutral reader #x gn reader #sonic the hedgehog x reader #sonic reader insert #metal sonic x reader #metal sonic #🦢﹒⁺﹒◍﹒ Rita's works ꒷ ₊ ˚#fluff headcanons #fluff #hcs #headcanons

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nakamvra · 1 day ago

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Drama was exactly the word Alice would use to describe the numerous board meetings she had already attended. Each department had their own agenda and each executive thought their work was far more important than the others'. She would be lying if she said she didn't fall into that same mentality sometimes. Alice was no stranger to the ego that came along with grand ideas.

She was lucky, at the moment, not to be on anyone's bad side. She had made allies in Reeve and Tseng; Heidegger was an ally to Scarlet, and he tolerated Alice well enough that Scarlet was never at her throat. She had a civil relationship with Hojo, and Isrieal now, too. And President Shinra enjoyed parading her around like Shin-Ra's shiniest trophy.

Really, the only director she hadn't made an impression on was Palmer, though the respect of the entire board never seemed to reach him, so Alice had no qualms shutting the man down at every opportunity. She had no desire to build a rapport with him since he served absolutely no purpose in her own ambitions.

"Hm..." Alice considered Isrieal's advice. Playing the game is all she had ever done since joining Shin-Ra. Even before, when she still lived in Junon, the game of the elite was a complex one to learn the rules of, but once she had, she dominated every session. Fake smiles and proper manners got her a long way. It was what recently got her her current position. The board of executives was another party of powerful elite men and women who could sense weakness in an instant and did not hesitate to use that weakness against its owner.

"I've been playing this game a long time... It's almost second nature for me to navigate among people like them. But don't worry about me. I'm quite good at making allies of difficult people." Alice smirked at Isrieal's quip about her own boss. "Heidegger isn't too bad. Loud, obnoxious, and impulsive? Sure. But once you learn to put up with that, you'll find he's actually quite competent."

There were many things Alice disagreed with Heidegger on, and their personalities tended to clash often. However, Alice also respected the authority the man could hold. He was excellent at strategy and rallying troops. He was a massive presence with a massive personality to match, and people listened to him without question.

If she lived long enough, perhaps she'd be around when the man finally croaked. His job is what she was truly after in the long run; she knew he'd die in the position before relinquishing it willingly. For now, though, she liked him well enough not to stage a coup.

Alice watched as Isrieal took a few blood samples, the crimson shine of her own blood feeling foreign. Somehow, despite seeing herself bleed many many times, she always imagined her blood running blue with mako through her veins, so much so it would appear the same once oxidized. Or, perhaps, her own delusions of importance imagined herself to be blue-blooded.

"I hope you don't mind sharing what you find when you run your tests." Alice never asked to see her own file from the labs, having done so once when she was younger and receiving a stern reprimand from Hojo. It's none of your business what I'm doing to you. That's how Alice had interpreted his response. However, Isrieal seemed interested in Alice's inquiries about her own treatment. Lowering the dosage of Mako was a sign that something in her treatments up until this point wasn't quite right, so perhaps she could get more information out of her new acquaintance.

Alice noticed the way Isrieal's body stiffened at the mention of her Mako treatments. Alice sighed, looking over Isrieal as she turned, taking her in as a whole. There was a lot to her that didn't quite make sense... Her story on her exposure to Mako one of those things.

"I don't know whether to consider you lucky or cursed..." Alice finally said. She had never experienced Mako poisoning herself, but had seen its effects in others. It wasn't an experience she envied... but to live without needing "tune ups"... that was an appealing concept.

Alice gathered herself, still slightly unsteady on her feet as she stood, but regaining her composure quite quickly. She would take another day off tomorrow to recover: an agreement she had come to with Heidegger so as to keep her image unmarred by her weakened state during her Mako injections. It was quite amusing hearing others speculate on her mysterious absences once every two months. Those in SOLDIER suspected more accurately the cause of them, but she preferred not to disclose any specific details to anyone.

Alice readjusted the leg of her loose trousers—a nice pair of professional looking pants that flowed fashionably yet were practical for these appointments. "I refuse to believe I can't control this." Alice straightened herself again, meeting Isrieal's eyes with the intensity that always burned behind them when her determination was sparked. Isrieal's advice was not bad per se, but it left too much to the hands of fate. She didn't believe in fate. Everything was controllable if one knew how to control it.

@ofgeneticperfection

“Don’t you worry about that.” She trills. “Even if they were giving me a problem I can handle them.” She says with a chuckle. Deep down they all knew they needed that next injection. To be cut off from that would mean inevitable discomfort and even death. “I understand all about reputation. You are not out to harm myself or this department so I’d say you are rather safe.” She says with a smile. “I do try to keep to a certain look myself.” She admits.

She may not care about her reputation so much in the eyes of others but she certainly would never allow herself to be seen as weak or anything less than perfect. “I know how it can be here the higher up you get. You’ve already achieved what is impossible to most, now you just have to withstand the drama of it all.” She says with a roll of her eyes. “Other departments may be out for you at some point, but it won't be me. I advise you play the right cards to all of them. It’ll be easier to deal with that way. Heidegger though? Well, sometimes I have to refrain from giving him a firm kick in the ass.”

He held the most hatred for the science department and was the most wary of her. He didn’t know what she truly was, but she could tell that he suspected there was more to her story. It also gave her the slight edge of intimidation over him. She presses around on her leg to feel what may be scar tissue or not. “I think you are alright for now.” She confirms. “I hope you don’t mind if I take a few blood samples. I’d like to look into something.” She grabs a few empty vials and quickly collects the blood as well.

“For now we will continue to stick to the day, so let’s hope that it can be helped.” She pulls the gloves off her hands and tosses them. She turns to organize her vials then comes to a pause when she mentions her eyes. It always made her feel guilty to some degree to not have to worry about degrading. She considers her thoughts for a moment then turns back to face her. “Oh, that. Well, I had an accident some years back. I fell into a good amount of Mako, poisoning and all. I guess I’m lucky that I even woke back up.” Here of all places.

“But over time I recovered and got my strength back. I was never part of Soldier or anything like that with constant doses so I guess… I never really needed any tune-ups.” The fact she even came back from that proved her resilience enough that Hojo had made her the next major Jenova project. One more personal than some Soldier to send off to war. It was those cells that kept her own from destroying themselves. Her rate of regeneration was far too high to have to worry about anything degrading. She hasn’t changed much at all in the past twenty years she’s known the Professor. People never seemed to stick around this place long enough to take note of that.

“The glow is just some side effect I guess.” She says with a shrug. “I don’t worry about what you do, but there are other things that I worry about.” She didn’t want others around her dying, her own secret project would hopefully find ways to preserve or transfer life. “I believe there are bigger threats out there that can put all of us into trouble.” The thing that resided in this very building was one of them.

“There is no use in worrying about what could come.” She tells her. “Unless something is actively happening it doesn’t make sense to waste your energy. As long as you are still healthy you just have to live by the day. None of us can know when it will end, not truly, and it might not even be by what you think. We cannot worry about what we can't control.”

@nakamvra

#ofgeneticperfection #alice said tell me your secret for not needing mako tune ups #then nvm because that sounds not fun actually

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