#and all i do is sit and think about u
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#man i’m way too stoned to enjoy music properly#shit is too slow#but maybe cuz i’ve been multitasking#kinda difficult not to though#the meatsuit executes various instructions simultaneously#parallel processing is the way to go#gotta wait til i’m normal then i go home#loitering in a stairwell rn#oh right this song#hurts to listen to ngl 🤣🤣#and all i do is sit and think about u#your song mf#eyeroll emoji#wojak mask meme#i hate weed paranoia#although this is nice enough#i just need to be alone with my thoughts. being with other people creates loops upon loops#it’s a real bother keeping track of them#wow cigarettes after sex stoned is really something else#bass is loud asf#i keep thinking there’s someone behind me#but mid-tempo songs become too slow#and another one of your songs#ford everest audio system#long time ago or yesterday#electrical midterm today was pretty good#computer organization not so much#reading fanfiction again lately#art is the weapon against life as a symptom or whatever it is mychem said on danger days#feel alive babeyyy
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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i miss them a little if im gonna be honest
#mp100#mob psycho 100#kageyama shigeo#kageyama ritsu#hanazawa teruki#tome kurata#tsubomi takane#shou suzuki#deliart#i meant for the image to be like. after the end but i also didnt think about the hairstyle changes. sorry......#also i know i was like shou 100% has dwarf hamsters since he got 2 but u know what i dont care. golden hamster stan for life#im planning on getting one i've been checking out breeders near me so i can get a proper healthy one. there are so many good ones here too#i already am thinking on what color im gonna go for..getting picky even. something like offwhite.. silver pearl.. silver dove.. silver mink#jurys still out on wether im gonna get another female or not#i do love how big ladies get and their intense energy and work ethic. truly the most passionate creatures i've ever come across. inspiring.#but a lazy fluffy guy that just sits around and washes his balls all day does seem easier. less likely to climb my curtains.#i got distracted i love hamsters so much. look at my mop drawing now everyone
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some contextless flickory & one hickory drawing that my partner said looked like he was posing for a perfume ad
#sandflakedrew#trolls hickory#trolls floyd#flickory#call this the Hickory Sitting Down set#posting as a treat for me because i have gotten a grand total of 3.5 hours of sleep in the last 6 daysssssssssssss#anyways.#do u guys ever think about how floyd's whole shtick is radical acceptance/empathy/mediator skills#and (if the context from world tour bonus features are added to the mix)#hickory has:#1. often had to fake an identity/a morally gray track record#2. had his heart broken many times#3. been made wary of being the one who's doing all the listening in a relationship#doST thine eyes sEE!!!!!!!!!#dost thou pONDER?!!!!#Man .#why are they in 2 separate movies#trolls
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im seeing very little coverage (at least on here) about how moo dengs popularity on the internet is leading to her being harassed at the zoo as well as how the khao kheow open zoo has a history of multiple cases of animal abuse for sake of entertainment (tw for the last link specifically- its a video that begins with a few seconds of moo dengs image but shows a baby elephant being stabbed & swat with a stick by a keeper for ‘discipline’).
while im glad that moo deng IS bringing awareness & a new love for pigmy hippos (which have a dwindling suggested 2000-3000 number population in the wild), i think we should also take into account that not all zoos/animal sanctuaries take the best interests of the animals they are supposed to care for to heart- especially ones that put more of a focus on entertaining tourists than caring for their animals.
#personal#moo deng#i understand that a lot of the ways the animals in zoos like this are treated have cultural ties & are methods that have been used#for hundreds of years but there are ways to not do that… its 130 am i cant really put everything im thinking of into a more professional#looking post but. i just think we should at least keep this in mind#something something chappell roan talking about being an overnight celebrity & being forced to cater to the publics every desire at the cos#of ur privacy#im not saying & posting all this to be a bummer btw we SHOULD celebrate her !! but we also have to be conscious about how animals like#moo deng are being handled & cared for#sorry i put so many tags im just sitting here thinking#u can reblog the post btw
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Guys while hallucinating on my new meds, I came to the realization that Mihawk was out on the open seas as swordsman since he was a teenager maybe even younger…. Did he ever finish a normal education?
Scratch that did he even have a normal education? Does he know math? Can my guy tell me the quadratic formula? Like I think we all forget as individuals how much school taught us yes the school system is broken blah blah but guys we understand germ theory and how birds fly and chemistry and biology that people just 60 years ago wouldn’t have known and would have killed to know, like I’m sure he can write and I’m pretty sure he can read but does he know how the moon pulls the tide? Did he know the earth wasn’t flat until he saw a globe for the first time?
Have we as individuals been bamboozled by the stoic gothic refinement of luxury that Mihawk projects we completely overlooked they fact the guy probably doesn’t know salt is a rock? Like wanna bet he saw how cool the over the top refined gay goth was and just like tailored that too his vibe but he’s never actually read a classic in his life?
What I’m trying to get at is Shanks who grew up around some of the smartest people in the world who spoke multiple languages, one was a doctor and you know Rayliegh who definitely doubled as a quartermaster might have a higher education then Mihawk.
Like I think it would be funny if Shanks was the guy who read books on Philosophy and artistic historical movements throughout the world (cough to impress Mihawk cough) and Mihawk doesn’t know how fish breathe underwater and has never read anything higher the a YA novel. (Which are awesome books but talk about reading a book by its cover! Lol… I’ll see myself out.)
#mishanks#akataka#Mihawk trying to be deep: it’s like the birds and flight we can only wonder how they do it#Shanks who learned about wind currents and lift when he was six: Mihawk do u not know how birds fly?#one peice#as someone with dyslexia and dysgraphia and has chicken scratch hand writing mood Mihawk#now I kinda want Shanks to sit Mihawk down and teach him cursive because you know Mihawk would be all over that for the ✨aesthetics✨#and no Mihawk not knowing things does not bother him I would think he has his priorities which is stab and sword be the best and look cunty#why would he need to know how the digestive tracks works for that? or what germs are? or how plants rat sunlight#one peice thoughts#by the way my meds are fine I’m just being dramatic#dracule mihawk#akagami no shanks#red haired shanks#mihawk shanks#shanks x mihawk#rambles
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Casey Stoner, Pushing the Limits
GP11:
GP12:
x
#casey stoner#brr brr#//#i realised i had one important take about the casey/vale rivalry that isn't linked to my actual thesis about them because. listen#i think about this line like. once a week. it haunts me in my sleep. i cannot carry this burden on my own any longer#casey. casey. is it really cOVERED?? with luminous yellow?? COVERED????#i'm not massively fond of the shade of red either but i don't think valentino was involved in making it more orange#my man saw the tiniest hint of yellow and was like 'what the fuck is this'#like valentino's LEATHERS are a wee bit yellow but that's!! not!! the bike!! also casey YOU had the aussie flag on your bloody bike number#the green is also on nicky hayden's gp12 btw like it's LITERALLY JUST THE NUMBER that's yellow#YOU DON'T EVEN SEE THE SEAT WHEN HE'S SITTING ON THE GP11 CASEY IT'S A RED BIKE#i don't have a coherent point about this but it is a LITTLE fascinating! like this made it into his autobiography!!#it's such an interesting thing to even notice no? like you're thinking about their stunning blood red being contaminated?#Does He View Valentino Rossi As An Infection? this is some symbolically potent shit when u think about it#do u think all valentino's victims have like. some kind of deeply ingrained aversion to the colour yellow. pavlovian response and all that#to be clear i find this very funny and i support casey in being a bit demented about valentino. who amongst us#heretic tag
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POOR GABRIEL MONTEZ! YOU NEVER SAW THIS COMING DID YOU? ALL YOU WANTED WAS POWER. SECURITY. SAFETY. & THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU GOT! JUST IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR BODY. LETS JUST HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS JUST HOPE YOU WONT HAVE TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw gore#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi suckening#jrwi gabriel#jrwi gabriel montez#LOOK FAMILIAR?hahahahahDONT WORRY#IM REUPLOADING THIS HERE BC i fixed up the drawing a lil. and also i wanted to add main tags#U WONT SEE ANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THISSUN N THE POST ON MY SIDEBLOG.i changed the image there too.HA!!!!!!!#ANYWAY.i rambled plenty about pain and gabe on my sideblog.SO LETS TALK ABT THE ART SHALL WE.ihad i very hard time getting the colors down#would u believe i nearly left this uncolored??FUCKED UP!! it was only a sketchhow did it end up like this. it was only a sketch...#BUT IM RLY GLAD I WENT W COLORING IT.this time i actually used the airbrush n pencil tools BUT i also have a handy dandy brush i made#its just the mspaint air brush tool. fucking LOVE THAT THING. but now its in fire alpaca and it can be slightly transparent.IT LOOKS SOGOOD#perfect for splatters and grime.i love you mspaint i love youuu.im also so happy w the blood here.i think i reached a shift last year#back when i made that genloss fanart something abt the way i draw blood finally CLICKED and im like OH. the inside must always be darker.#like i KNEW that already but it was like my hand itself finally had it click.i wonder what i will learn next?I LIKE THE ORGANS HERE TOO#not as veiny or thready as i usually draw em. but i think thats fine. not as WET as id like em to be but thats also fine.#i got the point across. the point ofc being WOW THIS IS GRUESOME AND PAINFUL AND TERRIBLE#I LOVE HIS EXPRESSION.i love pain and thinking abt pain. you lose yourself to it after enough time passes of just being in an ocean o agony#at one point its just too tiresome to scream or writhe. theres a point when the body accepts it.sometimes.atleast.#OHHH GABRIEL AS A CHARACTER DELIGHTS ME SO MUCH.he is a dog to me.a thing to serve others.I WISH I KNEW MORE#WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT BOY?? SURE POWER AND SECURITY AND SAFETY ARE NICE.BUT DID YOU HAVE DREAMS? WANTS? PASSIONS?#WHAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND THAT TIGER TATTOO ON YOUR ARM?WHAT DO THE DOGTAGS SAY BOY?I WISH I COULD HAVE TEA W U#OHHH TO SIT DOWN WITH A CHARACTER AND JUST SPEAK TO THEM. AND YET. AND YET IN THE END ITS ALL TRAGEDY AND COMEDY#TRAGEDY AND COMEDY THAT IS SO SO PAINFULLY UNBALANCED. SIGH.#WHATEVER CMERE BOY YOURE BECOMING AN OC OF MINE NOW UR GONNA BE IN SPACE AND UR NAME IS GONNA BE VINEGAR#UR STILL GONNA BE SHIP OF THESEUSED THOUGH. OOOHHH GABRIEEELLL GABRIEL MONTEEEZZZ#HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE BUILT INTO YOU.HOW MANY DID YOU LOVE AND CHERISH.HOW MANY TATTOOS DO U RECOGNIZE ON UR NEW ARMS#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? ON THE NIGHT U WERE SIRED?WERE YOU EXCITED? DID YOU SEE YOUR BOSS' FACE?WHAT WAS THIS PROMOTION LIKE?
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(Based off of the reality of having a metal ring in your back as a constant reminder of your fate and how that affects you as a person set in the Switzerland arc)
“Does it hurt?”
Ava’s pressed face down into the pillow sleep curling around her limbs. She hums, she can’t remember what she says, she’s exhausted. Her arms are tangled beneath her pillow. She holds her fingers tightly between each other, her bones ache from the pressure but her hands no longer shake. Ava hasn’t experienced this before, a fear that haunts her at night. (She finds she cannot stop dreaming about dying. It’s stifling in the cover of night trying to figure out where she is.)
She slowly opens her eyes and squints in the darkness. Beatrice is facing her a furrow in her brow that Ava knows she’s doing unconsciously. Ava’s lip quirks a smidgen, Beatrice looks funny. It’s a bit silly to her, Beatrice no doubt working out a solution to an unknown problem that Ava has yet to see in the middle of the night. In her sleepy state she wants to laugh at the imaginary cogs churning in Beatrice’s head.
Beatrice scooches closer and Ava panics, her skin can taste the dust of Bea’s forearm. She hoists herself up on her elbows, turning to face Beatrice. “Wha?” Ava’s shaking off bits of sleep from her mouth when Beatrice repeats herself.
“Does the Halo hurt?”
She doesn’t know if she wants to answer that. Ava peers over Beatrice squinting at the harsh light of the digital clock on Beatrice’s side. Ava loves it, it reminds her of the early 2000’s and the aesthetic of waking up to an alarm to go somewhere. The clock blinks an innocent 1:43 Am, and Ava debates on letting her head thump back down.
She turns her body on her side, she can feel the halo shifting in her back and it makes her want to throw up. The sides of the halo press against her shoulder blades and Ava resists the urge to yank it out. She grits her teeth and settles ignoring the skin of her back pulling tight to accommodate for the ring. Beatrice is still expecting an answer and Ava can’t lie to her, she pulls the covers of the sheet up to her chest hoping to bide more time for an answer.
"Everything hurts Bea," Ava smiles, "getting my ass handed to me is hard work."
Beatrice frowns displeased but looks at her through her lashes, it's unguarded, the stress and worries of the world stay out of their room in the dead of night. Her lashes are so pretty and Ava wants to curse the soft glow of the moon. There’s just enough moonlight to illuminate her eyes but overshadow her freckles. Ava swallows down the taste of defeat, she can’t win, she thinks.
Her gaze is soft, Beatrice is looking at her and it’s different yet the same. The same feeling in her chest constricting her lungs, the same soft gaze of Beatrice. Beatrice who likes what she sees in Ava when Ava can barely see where she begins. She doesn’t like to dwell on it, the truth of the matter being what belongs to Ava.
If she closes her eyes she can pretend just a little longer. She can give herself the hope of the future and what comes after all this. She can put down the fighting and the artifact and live. Ava doesn't want to think about it anymore, at least not tonight when Beatrice is here with her.
Beatrice is soft. She knows it from hours and hours of training. She's felt it when Beatrice corrects her form, in the way she talks. She speaks from a place of care like she has turned the harsh words in her brain over and over to soften the syllables spoken to Ava. And Ava doesn't linger on it, the meaning behind it, (Ava didn't think she'd make it this far, finding a person who cares quite like Bea does.)
And Ava's got it bad, she knows she's fucked because Beatrice doesn’t say anything about her language and Ava can't not tell her the truth. She looks down, her hand fiddling with the bed sheet underneath them.
"It doesn't hurt," if she thinks about it she can feel the fibers of the cotton between the pads of her fingers. "But it's very uncomfortable." She doesn't want to find the response in Beatrice's eyes, content to hear it from her voice. The soft British lilting accent that holds her just as soft as a touch.
She waits, she can picture Bea’s mannerisms with her eyes closed but maybe she should check just to be sure. Ava peers up at Beatrice and she’s suddenly closer. Her eyes really are pretty, there’s a depth to them that Ava wants to spend an ungodly amount of time studying.
“Can I help?”
#tko_writes#AND THEN THEY BANGGGG NASTY UGLY HARDDDDD#tenatively titled:#Do you think i'm kind?#in which i dump soup all over this google doc#soup being trauma#yeah this is ooc what about it#i need to go to bed right now#can u believe it i wrote something relatively normal#bleghhh#it wasn't as bad as I thought it would go#canon writing is boring to me personally but this wasn't too bad#it's just like blah blah imagine having a metal ring in ur back and how sleeping on ur side affects your body#just like body horror#and like the constant reminder of it because how do u escape something that's so uncomfortable sitting between ur shoulder blades but#helps you move and do all the things u dreamed of???#anyway got bonked with this idea talking with ard#everyone thank ard for this if u liked it#i was supposed to write more but i've gotta go to bed#Ava's thoughts are all over the place but i'm gonna say that's cuz she's sleepy#something somethign it's just all the trauma she's gone through because she's had the halo is present and she's constantly reminded of it#because it jostles inside of her and no one was really fit to house a halo#something something GET RID OF THE HALO BEARERS LET THOSE WOMEN LIVE THEIR LIVES#RAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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musings on marius' loneliness and songs i think that fit him
"Love From The Other Side" by Fall Out Boy | "Cautionary Tales" by Jon Bellion | "Not What I Meant" by dodie | "A Place To Call Home" by Stereo Honey | "Golden" by Fall Out Boy | "Anyway" by Kerrigan and Lowdermilk
#tears of themis#marius von hagen#lu jinghe#tot marius#//sitting here thinking about it all...ive already made a post abt the dodie song but now i have more. do u. do u See#sorry i repeated a band but it's FALL OUT BOY can anybody blame me (the correct answer is no)
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📸: Ryan Fleming
#ok listen. we all know I'm Going Thru Something when it comes to this man. so. this is. i am. i just think that. *dies*#5sos#5 seconds of summer#luke hemmings#luke#the 5sos show tour lisbon#ryan fleming 2023#Instagram#band ig#kh4f post#i just. feel so unhinged sometimes in such brand new ways it surprises even ME#🧛🏻♀️#like#WHAT AM I MEANT TO DO WITH THIS INFORMATION#DO U SEE THAT CHEST HAIR#THE COLLARBONE#IT'S JUTTING#DO YOU ZEE THE JUTTING COLLARBONE#AND I'M JUST SUPPOSED TO SIT HERE AND FINISH THE EMAIL I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING??#FITTINGLY IT WAS TO MY THERAPIST SO ACTUALLY MAYBE THAT WORKS OUT 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩#that necklace jfc i am. i am fine. don't worry about it I'm actually doing great thanks#and the beard#i'm 🤸🏻♀️ doing 🤸🏻♀️ okay 🤸🏻♀️#THIS IS CERTAINLY PHOTOGRAPHY#GONNA LEAVE NOW THINKING ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE AND APPRECIATE VISUAL MEDIA#the 5sos show tour
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To be fair to "illario is bad at lying" I don't think he had a contingency plan for "my cousin who I tried to have murdered came back after a whole year of being tortured in an underwater prison by the lady I've been sleeping with and he's an abomination now, also I have to pretend my grandma got murdered." His plan got monumentally fucked up
THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYIINNGGG. no matter how good or bad you are, i do not seriously think there’s a way to prepare for all that and then execute a follow up plan that’s not just “oh fuck i gotta do something” i think. of course this could have been avoided if he just killed lucanis himself but i like to think he has a heart in there
#literally went back on my posts to consider when ive said ‘illario is bad at lying’#because i of all people on this site am the one most likely to exaggerate how good he is at his work#if ur talking about the one where i said ‘illario is bad at lying’ and followed it up with ‘i dont think he should be’ then#yeah i dont think he should be#if i got the chance to drive his character he would be more competent AND liked and very#like obviously fill out the skill sets lucanis doesnt have. and not make it obvious that hes the villian#eg. the funeral talk lol. he spends that whole conversation going#’grandma’s ashes. the ashes for the funeral. the funeral ashes. grandma’s ashes for thr funeral. sure okay. i have to go’#which teia actually does believe is grief since she compares it to how he was when lucanis ‘died’#so ya know . not horrible. believable enough to fool talons!#if u have come from that mile long illario textpost then know ive had to sit thru#people calling him stupid . HES NOT . he was faced with the stupid topsiest turviest situation of all time#take rook and getting hired out of this equation and illario would have done it#he would have failed at a later stage because this implies he kills anyone who actually likes him#but he would have succeeded for about a week. and then he would get killed. lol#like i do think he is stupid for trusting a venatori to keep her word HOWEVERRRR. he was pretty good at the lying part!
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doctober day 17: einstein
okay so theres a bit in the game where young emmett is testing einstein on his multiplication tables. there is ALSO a bit where marty tells einstein to sit/stay and he doesnt listen. thus i present my hypothesis, which is that doc 100% had his priorities straight during the puppy years
#back to the future#bttf#doctober#doctober 2023#marty mcfly#einstein brown#doc brown#emmett brown#michael j fox#christopher lloyd#my arts#my sketchy wip arts#puppy einstein my absolute BELOVED#and small(er) marty too :')#i cant draw dogs lmbo just pretend it looks good#also in all fairness einstein doesnt need/use a leash so clearly doc had SOME priorities in order#...so maybe it wasnt that he didnt UNDERSTAND 'sit'. he just didnt care LMBO. einstein u legend ily#also can u tell how my motivation petered out as the comic continued 💀🫣 i do not seeee#anyway. i just love thinking about pre movie them :')#(was gonna say twin pines!them but tbh lone pine!them also owns my ass in a different way so 🤷 just pre movie them full stop. send tweet)
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3 YEARS SINCE CTOMMY DIED... GOOD LORD
#my post#caps#I WAS IN SHOCK#NONONO I REMMEBER I WAS IN REHEARSAL WHEN THE STREAM AHPPENED SO WHEN I GOT HOME I WAS WATCHING THE VOD#AND I WAS HALFWAY THROUGH THE VOD NO SPOILERS WHEN I GOT A NOTIF OF JACK GOING LIVE#AND HIS TITLE WAS SOMETHING LIKE 'TOMMYS DEAD LETS CELEBRATE' AND I WAS LIKE ??? SURELY NOT???? SURELY NOT????????#AND THEN HE DIEDDDDD AND I STARED BLANKLY INTO THE DISTANCE FOR THREE DAYS STRUAGHT#LITERALLY IT WAS ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT ALL DAY#I WAS LIKE OBSESSIVELY COUNTING TH EMINUTES SINCE HED DIED#LIKE AT SCHOOL SITTING IN CLASS LIKE 'it has been 37 hours and 42 minutes since ctommy died' IT WAS BAD#AND THEN ID DRIVE HOME LISTENING TO SAD MUSIC AND CRY BCUS IT REMINDED ME OF HIM..........#I WAS DOING SO WELL. AS U CAN TELL. AS YOU CAN SO CLEARLY SEE.#TOMMYS DEATH DID HORRIBLE TERRIBLE THINGS TO ME AND IM SP GLAD HE WAS ONLY DEAD FOR 3 DAYS BCUS I WOULD NEOT HAVE SURVIVED
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Love being able to write. I can do whatever i want. I can make Ryuji interact w Lala-chan and u literally cant stop me.
#chattin#i feel like shinjuku and crossroads doesnt get enough love#ohya and lala dont get enough love 😭#if they had an option to work there as a parttimer some how my akira wouldve absolutely taken it#u never see the place packed or w customers at all; it just feels cozy every time u go there#akira doesnt have a lot of places free from prying eyes; so id imagine he goes there often to just hang and study#catch up w ohya and get a bit of knowledge and validation from lala#like shes so sweet. i love her. she comes across as wise without being unapproachable#she makes comments she shouldnt (talking about ohyas job and history) bc she just forgot that she shouldnt lol#adamant about not letting him drink while hes there. its like. a safe space for him.#and i think hed like to invite his friends into his safe space; esp ryuji#gets to a point where even ryuji stops by on his own sometimes.#hes got questions but hes always in his head; never says it out loud#but it leads him in the right direction almost all the time#im thinkin of him having like. the most base level internalized homophobia and transphobia#like the kind of shit you just pick up as a child and teen and never question#and u kinda make fun of it bc everyone else is. but akira stumbles into his life and makes it so confusing#like. i dont think hed be trans. but akira would make him second guess alot about himself#about what he likes. what hes into. what hes okay w doing w someone like akira#and lala is like. u got that look in ur eyes kid. come sit.#doesnt entirely get it. but he feels a little lighter. not on labels but on his feelings#‘kid. u think of the ideal person and u think of him. at that point; it dont matter what bits he got.’#and its blunt and MAYBE it gets him a little flustered. but hes always responded well to blunt words. no beating around the bush#makes his brain confront shit head on without the second guessing hed suffer through when left on his own#WAA. rambling.#gonna see if i can draft this up at some point
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hi! birthday. which means it's finally time t
yo what the itch store is fixed up now
damn what? I don't know where this came from. look all the comics I put on g*mr**d a year ago are back here again with all the formatting and typesetting by @fireflysummers as well as the exclusive bonus art wtf who did this. my werewolf comic on here too what the hells!! that one also got re-toned for printing if u want to AND an exclusive cover spread !!! what the fuck!!!!! come see for urself I can't make this shit up
#bakuspecial#comic#itch.io#bakugoods#<- made up a tag for when I sell things that aren't commissions just now#for folks who still remember me talking abt a physical run of these comics: I'm so sorry this year and the last have been brutal#and I live in a well and suffer a curse of international mails never going well. so the logistics became Very complicated#I still think abt it tho! I've prepped up all the assets just bc I thought abt it so much... we picked out a gift print for the orders#And a bonus print for the pack#but I couldn't gather my brain enough to make it happen. yet#it takes a bit of overhead so I gotta build that up. which is. right now talk for after the shit that just happened to me got smoothed out#but I do want it to happen. I've been sitting on this exclusive custom print for like two years now#I really love that drawing its so cute. I still hold that project close to my heart#anyways uhh itch store! happy birthday to me!#last year this time was so rough I didn't even Want to think about my birthday lol#strangely enough with this small little fragmentation grenade we just got I became more motivated to fuck around on my bday lmao#probably out of spite. hammer philosophy#my parents love making a whole thing out of me and the brother's bdays lol so dinner's gonna be something#but for now I can still chill. and prep up stuff. and do my thang#if u look thru the itch store and get something from there thank u so much! I hope the comics treat u well#and now. I make hot drink. have a good day lads! do a little jig for us let's go
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