#and actually tissues would probably have come in handy

[javelinbk]

The parents of Shea Stadium, 15th August 1965

The police/support staff

The fans

[explosionkatsu]

“Age doesn’t matter” 7

Dad!Bakugo x F!Babysitter!Teacher!Reader

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

The next day arrived and Katsuki behaved toward Y/n as if nothing occurred in her apartment.

After what he witnessed yesterday, Katsuki decided to entrust Y/n. He decided to rely on her concerning Kazui. He wouldn't acknowledge it of course but she's a huge benefit to him. The only thing he should do is to make Y/n officially Kazui's babysitter. He didn't mind her tutoring him as well. But he's confident Kazui didn't need tutoring knowing how intelligent his son is.

Y/n on the other hand was feeling frightened when she hasn't seen Katsuki drop Kazui. He probably took him away from her. But when she caught the same car Katsuki used, her heart pounded happily.

"Ms. Y/n! Ms. Y/n!"

Y/n beamed and rushed to Kazui providing him with a tight embrace. She thought she won't be able to see him again.

"Too tight, dumbass."

She heard Katsuki say.

She looked up at him happily causing Katsuki to be surprised. He has never seen that look from her before so it took him off guard but maintained his composure.

"Thank you." Y/n mouthed wiping a small tear from her eyes.

"Ms/ Y/n? Are you okay?" Kazui asked confusedly once Y/n let him go.

"I am, sweetie." Y/n smiled softly at him. "Now go inside, you want to have your first late attendance, right? It'll ruin your record."

Kazui looked at her terrified. "Nooo!!" He yelled dashing towards the school entry.

Both adults watched him make his way inside without stumbling or tripping.

When Kazui faded from their view, Y/n turn in Katsuki's direction.

Katsuki on the other hand was bewildered. Why wasn't he leaving? Was he waiting for Y/n to say something to him?

"Thank you for bringing him today, Katsuki," Y/n said softly as she shift her gaze to her feet.

"The hell are you saying? It's his school. Fuck off." Katsuki reacted looking away.

Y/n chuckled before responding, "W-well, after what occurred yesterday. I-

"What?" Katsuki questioned shifting his gaze towards her. "What happened yesterday was my fault. I should've known your side before jumping to conclusions." Katsuki confessed. What the hell was happening to him?

Y/n just smiled. "W-well then. If you're going to pick him up. You know where to go."

"Tch. You don't have to tell me!"

And with that, Katsuki left the smiling Y/n behind.

They both didn't notice the camera concealing from the trees around the school.

..

The night began to fall bringing Y/n’s shift to an end.

Like how she usually does, she would pack up the things she needed to do at home with Kazui’s belongings as well and flee the school before the sky dimmed.

It was a normal day and nothing interesting happened. And boy she was glad she’ll get her work ID anytime now since she’s a new employee and all.

Well like I said before, she was a babysitter, right?

Nonetheless, as they both reached her apartment, Kazui zoomed in instantly to turn the tv on while Y/n just put his stuff in her bedroom, along with hers.

When she came back dressed in comfortable clothes, she watches Kazui's eyes fixed on the tv. What was so interesting?

Out of curiosity, you take a glimpse at what he was watching.

There was his papa being interviewed. All bruised up. Catching this caused your eyes to widen.

Katsuki will pick Kazui soon, so that means he’ll be here at any moment now.

So what did you do? You headed to the bathroom and collected your aid kit.

Well, why do you need this when your quirk is healing?

Lemme tell you.

Y/n’s quirk is like any ordinary healing quirk. Broken bone? No problem. Destroyed muscle tissue? You got it. But the only drawback in her quirk is that whatever injury she heals, she’ll be the one suffering. If her body doesn't seize the pain, wounds, and scratches would appear everywhere on her body.

As much as possible, she tried and use it less due to the actuality that she knows it’ll come in handy. Just like today.

As soon as Katsuki messages her he’ll come over, she’s unpacking the contents from her kit.

She waited for him to come while preparing dinner and just to be sure, she prepared a meal good for 3 people because she kinda felt like he’ll be starving.

Then she heard a knock. Almost immediately, she patted her hands on the apron she was wearing and scurried to the front door. She even saw Kazui from her peripheral vision getting up from being seated comfortably and peering from the sofa, displaying only his eyes gazing curiously at the entrance.

When you unlock the door, reveals a Katsuki being held by a nervously grinning Eijiro.

“Hey.” Eijiro greeted. “Bakubro here said I should bring him here. Sorry about this though.”

“Uncle Kiri!” Kazui beamed, running towards him and giving him a big from his legs.

“Hey, there kiddo. I didn't know you’d be here.” Eijiro smiled.

“Red riot!” You exclaimed covering your mouth.

“Kirishima is fine. Hehe.” Eijiro said. “So uh, may we can in?”

“Oh my, please do!” You stepped aside letting Eijiro get in with Katsuki, almost dragging him to the sofa.

“Uncle, what happened to Papa?” Kazui instantly sat beside his unconscious father.

“Don’t worry kiddo. He’s just resting.” Eijirou assured before turning his gaze to you. “Do you have any med kit we can use?”

Y/n just smiled. Before she moves a chair near them, she first switched the fire from her stove and went back to them holding a chair.

“Let me help-

“No, please. You are injured as well. Just rest, okay?” Y/n smiled and place the chair in front of them and then went back to the kitchen to grab the med kit from the counter.

Once she got everything, Eijiro was about to thank her for bringing the kit they both needed, but Y/n halted him causing Red Riot to look at her confused.

“I have a healing quirk.” Y/n smiled softly at Eijiro.

“Really!?” Eijiro smiled feeling a bit better.

You nodded in response. “May I tend him first, Red Riot?”

“Please. Just Kirishima.” Eijiro sweatdropped making him scratch the back of his head.

“O-oh! Apology! Kirishima.” You said a little embarrassed.

Eijiro grinned saying it's not to worry about. He watches how Y/n’s demeanor turned serious.

He gazes at her intently seeing her closing her eyes as if focusing on her surrounding. Minutes now, Eijiro saw Y/n take a deep breath before slowly opening her eyes revealing a bright blue color.

Kazui, seeing this hid behind his father’s limp arm, as if scared.

Y/n saw this. She gave Kazui a closed eye smile. “Don’t be afraid sweetie. This is still me.”

Her focus went back to Katsuki. She held his hand gently and a small circle of light came out of her hand and visibly ran under Katsuki’s skin.

Eijiro and Kazui watched in amazement.

Once the light found where Katsuki was wounded, it slowly disappears.

Y/n though closed her eyes, slightly wincing.

The same scenario happened, the comforting light passing through Katsuki’s body, slowly healing him.

The scrapes, wounds, and bruises had been lost to sight from Katsuki’s skin. No scars or marks were left.

Eijiro’s eyes were wide. “That was. Awesome!”

Y/n chuckled at his childish reaction.

“You’re so cool- uh. What’s your name?”

“(First Name) (Last Name)” You smiled at him. “You can call me Y/n.”

“You’re so cool, Y/n!” Eijiro beamed at her.

“Thank you, Red- Kirishima.” You chuckled. “May I hold your hand?”

Eijiro blinked but nodded right away. He slightly reached his hand out to Y/n who held it.

She’s so gentle. What Eijiro thought. He watches her do what she did to Katsuki, only this time, it's his turn.

The light coming from her was comforting, almost like it was lulling him to sleep. He can even feel the pain from his injuries vanishes.

Minutes passed after Y/n finished healing both heroes.

Eijiro excitedly stood up and stretched. “Wow. Not even the Medic from our agency can do this. Thank you so much, Y/n! It really helps! If you need anything, you can just message me!” Eijiro said showing Y/n the result of her quirk. Although, his eyes turn to worry when he saw Y/n rubbing her arms as if wincing. “Are you okay?” he asked worriedly and slowly approach her.

Y/n’s iris went back to its original form. She gave Eijiro a strained smile before responding. “Don’t worry. It's just the drawbacks of using my quirk.” You assured.

“Ms. Y/n! You have bruises!” Kazui got up beside his father who was stirring slightly as if waking up and rushes to his teacher’s side.

“What do you mean?” Eijiro asked worriedly, sitting back to where he was seated before.

Y/n was hesitant at first. But she knows sooner or later, they’ll know. So it's best if she just informs them. “Well, every time I use my quirk on someone, the pain taken out from them will be transferred to me. If my body couldn't deal with the pain, bruises would usually emerge,” she said smiling at Eijiro before showing the big purple bruise on her arm.

Eijiro’s eyes once again widen. “W-what!? Why would you use it on us t-then?!”

“Because you’re heroes,” Y/n said making Eijiro silent. “People need heroes. So you should be at your best.”

“The fuck is going on.”

“Papa!”

Y/n and Eijiro stopped conversing once they heard the familiar voice and shift both their faces to him.

Kazui tackled his father who was slowly sitting up. “Euf.”

“Papa! I’m glad you’re awake!” Kazui said embracing his father.

Katsuki let the sofa take all of his body weight. He raised a hand and placed it on Kazui’s head, patting it. “Tch. As if something like that could kill me.”

Y/n turns her gaze back to Eijiro looking at him worried. “Please don't tell him.” You mumbled.

Eijiro blinked. Why wouldn't you want Katsuki to know this?

Eijiro’s shoulder suddenly slumped making him sigh quietly. He then looked back at Y/n and just smiled before nodding his head.

..

Heroes' job was the hardest. That's what most all people would say. They would even sacrifice their lives just to maintain peace.

For Y/n, being a hero was the most common dream every student she has. She would watch them play, even argue because they don't want to play be the villain. She would only giggle every time one of her students ended up going to her just because they don't want the role their playmates assigned them.

But sometimes, Y/n would question herself.

Was it worth it?

Was it worth it seeing the people smile once they knew they were finally safe?

Was it worth it seeing the people rely on you for peace?

Was it even worth it?

No, she's not a villain. But sometimes these questions would cross her mind. Why now though?

Because of the scene in front of her.

Bakugo resting on the sofa watching Kirishima and Kazui interact. She would see Kirishima and Kazui laugh while Bakugo would smirk. Even hide a smile.

The scene in front of her was heart melting. Like normal family time.

..

"Now for our latest news. It seems that our no. 2 was now involved in a romantic relationship."

This statement made Katsuki and Kirishima flinched causing their attention to shift to the news.

"What?" Katsuki growled.

"Around 7 am this morning, Dynamight was found with a lady near the kindergarten school."

"It is said that Dynamight has been acting rather close to this kindergarten teacher."

"Based on the images we gathered. It shows Dynamight in his usual work outfit and the teacher having a conversation."

"Don't you think we're looking too deep into this, partner?"

"Well, they do seem like just having a normal conversation me." The newscaster laughed.

Pissed off, Katsuki flipped through the channel while glaring at the tv.

Eijiro was quiet though. He knows not to bother Katsuki when pissed. But the news surprised him causing him to divert his attention to his friend.

The media does this to spread false humor which Katsuki hated the most. Why can't they just mind their own business?

Although, his gaze shifted to Y/n who was taking her time preparing dinner for them.

Wait.

Since when did he let her prepare their meal?

And the fuck happened to his wounds?

[wishjacked]

Happy #WebcomicDay!! :D

This year we're celebrating the process of making pages... so below the cut I've got a bunch of pictures sharing how I go about making pages of my evil post-apocalyptic workplace sitcom, Cargo!! :D

So! My process!!

Writing-> I think sometimes there's pressure to "write" your comic a certain way, I see people talking about script format and stuff a lot. That really doesn't work for me, though! I write my "first draft" script in short scenes on scrap paper, in whatever order they come to me. Sometimes a scene will just be one or two lines, and then a little description of what I want to happen in the rest of the scene.

Later I type the scene up, and write the "connective tissue" that fits between the disjointed scenes so they all flow together like they ought. I don't do page breaks or even character tag or action notes hahahaha I like it to be as BASIC as POSSIBLE so it's easy to edit. And since I'm the person drawing it I can almost always remember who's supposed to be saying what lmao

I edit a lot, but the most major editing is also probably the last bit... when I letter my pages usually I realize "they would never say that" and so I end up rephrasing everything. My art brain is sometimes waaaaay better at phrasing hahaha. Like you can see in the finished page for this script I rewrote like basically all of it, and actually went back to the original "sketch" script in a lot of places.

Thumbnailing-> my thumbs are really big, I draw them with markers on printer paper and keep them in a binder!! I like to thumb scenes in batches and I also usually write my dialogue on them, just so I can read through them before (and while) I draw to get a feel for how the pacing works. :)

Sketching-> OH sketching is also really hard for me! I don't have a good visual imagination so it's really important for me to make sure I have good references. Last year I was especially focusing on setting.

My comic is set in Florida. I'm lucky in that I used to live there and still go back to visit sometimes, so sometimes I can gather my own reference images! But more often I start on Google Maps or Zillow, trying to find buildings that have interesting features or the right kind of "look" for what I want. I'll also look up other interesting elements, my comic is set in a post-apocalypse and I'll research home gardening and things like that which people would probably have.

For example, in this set in chapter 7, I used Google Maps images, photo references of indoor hydroponic gardening, and like, 90's-00's hacker computer setups haha. Also my BFF Roomstyler.com, where you can make 3d house interiors haha!!

Lineart-> I LOVE lineart it is my favorite!!!! I sketch and ink two pages at a time, and it usually takes somewhere between 10-12 hours to do both steps.

I actually think my art looks best when it's just lineart... but I think my STORY is better with color, like it makes it clearer and easier to read and it has a better atmosphere HAHA.

Colors-> I think it usually takes me 4-6 hours to do 2 pages (I haven't timed myself as consistently as I time my lineart and sketching). I have a big file with small copies of my previous pages that I color drop from, and my characters are all flats only. The limited palette that I use is also really handy, it streamlines coloring a LOT.

Finishing Touches-> aka I steal mercilessly from my one true love, my internet home, the beautiful and blessed Wikimedia Commons

I put lots of overlay layers on my art! I like textures so having some strange little textures or pictures on things makes my art feel a lot more finished to me.

And finally my very most favorite ✨finishing touch✨ is the bright colored/patterned gutters that I use. Here are some of my favorites that I've made and used in the past!

And that's all!! I hope you guys have a very happy Webcomics Day and find lots and lots of wonderful new things to read!!!

[taegularities]

Hello, Rid 💕💕

You dropped so many bombs that there's no way for me not to come and ramble in your inbox again.

First of all, it's honestly a big turn off for me when I see unhealthy jealousy and possessiveness in a story too. I understand that jealousy is a human emotion that you can't help but feel sometimes, but when characters (or real life people for that matter) use that as an excuse to either be unhealthily possessive or a downright asshole, that's when it really becomes too much for me. And this goes for over the top protectivenese as well. I just think there's a right time and place for that and not every problem has to be solved with violence.

That's actually one of the many things I think you do so well in cmi. Like for example in that scene at the club where Seokjin's friend is bothering OC and instead of letting his anger get the best of him, Jungkook considers what would be best for OC 🥺🥺🥺 I think that's so much more admirable than lashing out with no thought. And the way they protect each other by looking out for each other and caring in subtle ways as well. Every time OC defends Jungkook in front of her parents and stands by him too 🥺🥺🥺 That being said, people do need their ass beat sometimes and that's probably when JK's muscles and OC's fierceness come in handy lmao.

Also a Valentines day drabble for my favourite couple??? That sounds so lovely I'm literally 🥺🥺🥺 irl at the thought of that. I have no ideas about what they would get for each other though, I am very much not creative and romantic when it comes to these kinds of things. As you can tell, I share my love through slightly incoherent rants lmao. All I know is that I would love to see them before the angst. And you say cmi7 next week??? I'm even happier that I have free time now. I'll be ready with tissues whenever you're ready to post it, Rid.

And lastly, I don't even know what to say about you mentioning that you're writing another cocky Jungkook. Your Jungkook stories will one day be the death of me, I swear. Looking forward to screaming about that one too one day.

I usually don't really ramble this much irl, but you make me so comfortable and there's so much to say about your stories that I can't help it. Thank you for always listening 💞💞💞

ivi !! lmfao yes, i apologise for the 💣💣💣 they were super random today 🤣

i agreeee. in all honesty, i used to like the drama around jealousy, too, and smut based on it is something i still enjoy if done right hahaha but i've learned, through fics and personal experience, that it's genuinely a nasty feeling. i think it's lovelier when person A comforts person B rather than provoking them (unless they're being playful or have a reason, which we'll see in c&f i guess :')). so i get where you're coming from.

and AHHH yes! that's something i really love about the cmi couple, too... like, jk isn't a very jealous person in general; he prioritises other emotions. and as for oc, we already know how she deals with all that (e.g. through nara), so... ugh yeah i miss them so much <3 (and yes... yes, one day, they will need their muscles/fierceness hehehe)

omg yeeeee, i'm gonna try and write this drabble! it's gonna be a smol thing, but yesh, just another potential day in their lives 💕 and hopefully a sweet treat before the angst.. :') i'm super excited.. happy you are, too 🥺 the cocky jk.... no comment 🤣

ahhh omg ofc !! i'm glad you think of this blog as a safe space to ramble, i always enjoy your messages 💕 thank you for always talking to me as well, ivi 🤍

[number-onekidqueen]

TTPD (and rep?) Theories

Come with me as I clown and theorise some things.

1. Ok, let’s start off with some things that I’m actually quite sure of (maybe?). I am fairly positive that the music video released at 8pm EST, will be fortnight. And maybe it will be the first single. Why you ask? Well-

Firstly, using the video she posted today as evidence the first scene is presumably her office. There we have a CD of midnights and four of the special addition vinyls. Midnights is her tenth album.

Now if we remember back to school, and that handy addition, four plus ten would be fourteen. Hence, a fortnight.

Next, on the planning board where she wrote the news we have fourteen tally’s beneath it. Need I say more?

2. Here comes some of my dicier theories. I think somehow four will be a factor in some way. I’m not exactly sure how, but it will. There are four versions of TTPD (the manuscript, the bolter, the albatross and the black dog), there were four stars on the notice board, and there were four cds. Now four and 2 seem to be commonly occurring. Which leads me to think, what if there was a double album release. I know people have said this before, and I’m probably delulu, BUT the cd nearest to the camera was black, you had to get through black before you got to the TTPD office. And it would tie in with no explanation just reputation.

Don’t ask me for dates, idk 😭. Something to do with 4 I guess?

The only solid theory I had was that it was related to the fortnight theory again. If the release date of rep tv was released 4hrs before or after or 4 days or gosh even the day of, and then it actually got released a fortnight later that would be 3/5 (or 5/3 for Americans), which is actually the age she’s turning this year, and it might tie up the fact that she’s getting back her reputation this year as she comes halfway through her thirties.

And also just a random thought, maybe 14 and fortnight is significant especially in this album, because 13 has always been her and her lucky number, and fourteen was plus Joe who was the extra 1, the 1 for her until she wasn’t.

That or there are four singles, or extra songs will come out at 4am EST or there’ll be 4 extra songs.

Will this come true? Who knows, that’s how I’m feeling about it ^^.

That’s all I have for now, but i wished everyone happy clowning. And when TTPD comes, remember tissues and maybe even some chocolate.

[violetren]

Aether Chapter 12

Moar Training! This time around trying to teleport permanent non-aether constructed objects along side Maggie. Something that could very well have nuclear fallout that makes the explosion that killed Maggie the second time around look like a car backfiring.

Featuring Hannah (aka Nexus aka Ashley's crush) for very real practical reasons... Because why would anyone use phones? Or radios? No no no, its gotta be telepathy... you know... For security. Not just as a thin as fuck excuse for Ashley and Hannah to spend time together, no-siree.

Except yeah they are absolutely both that level of uselessly gay and pining.

So training continues and Maggie has the fucking audacity to feel disgruntled that she can only kinda teleport things after 2 hours. Which is wild considering when the day started it was entirely theoretical. The lady is far more badass than she gives herself credit for.

Hannah helps her break through her progress block and then she's off to the races. She hasn't transported anything with living tissue yet but she can move things as complex as computers and phones with wifi connections (handy if you were ever gonna be working on a team and needed to take say an ear piece or something for teamwork reasons...).

Ashely's excitement over it all is nice and the way Hannah reacts to her hugging Maggie leads me to the conclusion that both of them need so much fucking therapy.

Hannah at least never goes so far as to try and stop Ashley from having friends, she appears self aware enough to know that her feelings are her problem, but she still isn't doing great with how she treats the people she's jealous of (not that she's awful, but she isn't fair) and its entirely because she won't just talk to Ashley about here feelings. Ultimately she's not doing great but she's doing ok which is more than can be said for Ashley.

Ashley who can tell that Hannah is jealous of Maggie and Eurion, and recognise that it means that her long time crush returns her feelings. But she's so caught up in shame and self loathing that she can't just ask her out. I'm actually sort of offended of Hannah's behalf over this because how fucking badly must it suck as a telepath and at least partial empath to be able to tell that your crush is so caught up in her own insecurities and self loathing that she thinks you would be that cruel to her.

It's not exactly a fair view to take. Ashley has been through a lot coming into her own while living in a society (and growing up in a home) which would prefer she be someone else entirely/not exist and of course it has left its scars.

But I also don't think its an incorrect one. What's that one tumblr post? "It hurts to know that the me in your head is so unkind/Please don't use me to be cruel to yourself" Or something to that effect. I kinda feel like Ashley hasn't had that realisation yet that her insecurities are creating insecurities in Hannah, and knowing that might help give her the kick in the panties she needs to just fucking talk to Hannah about what is going on in her head?

I did enjoy my validation that Eurion has been hanging out with Ashley probably getting thoroughly exasperated over her lack of progress asking Hannah out.

Anyways, we end on Maggie accidentally making a grenade. So that's cool. Good to know she'll have an offensive option when shit goes down.

[vertanvertan]

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[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

Christmas.

***sigh***

The tree is beautiful. It was beautiful before I decorated it. I told it so. it bends against the ceiling, the tinsel waving i the drafts.

Under it sits the fake gifts I wrapped up for myself, enough so it looks nice (as plain tissue paper offers…don’t wanna waste the good stuff on me) I even found a bit of ribbons for some bows. It will give me something to unwrap each day until the tree comes down at old Christmas.

The turkey is roasting, the cranberry sauce made, the animals given their treats, and the pie baked. (I made a wee bit too much pie filling so I pinched the edged of the crust up to make an extra deep dish pie)

I’m wearing a lovely wool sweater Mom got Pop that he never got to wear, which is handy when you can see your breath in the house. I’m even wearing jewelry, three rings and a necklace. One of the rings is this big chunky thing with a face carved of bone I don’t dare wear when I am “doing stuff”.

On tv I’m playing my favorite variations of A Christmas Carol and The Nutcracker, with dashes of things like A Muppet Family Christmas.

Really it’s about as nice as I can set it up for myself.

And I’m crying.

It’s just so…..lonely.

Some I can’t help, like that I can't be with Mom and that on the phone she wasn’t having a good day.

Some I blame myself for. Two people, one my first actual real world friend in ages, and the other a sort of ally in difficulties, have both turned cold towards me. I made the mistake of honesty in both cases, expressing my unhappiness about something.

I know better. I KNOW if someone says something that hurts you or they wrong you in some way you have a choice. You can say “Hey, please don’t say that to me.” or “Could you please help me out here�� or whatever, and end up offending the. Or instead you can swallow it, let them keep hurting you or wronging you but keep the peace.

No matter how carefully you try to bring up whatever it is, explain your feelings, make it clear you aren’t angry, and so forth it always ends up the same. People think what they think and feel what they think and feel, and the second you suggest you experience things differently they get upset. You tell someone something they are doing hurts your feelings and they have their feelings hurt because they see it as you attacking them. And then you apologize and try to smooth things over….

Humans are exhausting! Half the time I don’t even know exactly what I did wrong, and having to be the one to make the peace under those circumstances is painful. I always have to be the peacemaker while still being seeing is the one in the wrong.

Geez, the only person I can remember always apologizing to me when they hurt me was Stacy, and haven’t seen him since I was 9!!**

(Actually, Pop would apologize. I can still hear him saying sorry, usually upset at having upset even if he didn’t get what was upsetting. Parents are more complicated though, particularly in my case. We were so close there was a lot of subtext instead of text, things that didn’t need saying because we just knew from a gesture or expression.)

So here it is Christmas, and I feel shut out, excluded. It’s a different kind of alone when you rebuffed than when you are merely forgotten.

You can be forgotten because the person is happy or busy or you are a tiny corner of their full life. It isn’t personal. They likely still care some.

Rebuffed or rejected is different. They thought of you and the thoughts were negative. It’s personal.

I dunno. Today I just wish I could hear someone say “Merry Christmas” or laugh about some silly thing or just share my darn pie with. Maybe I just want to feel loved. I do without it well enough most days, but on Christmas I used to feel so much love. I wasn’t ever alone.

**Which is probably why I in as much love with him as a child could be.

[walkeddeath]

　　"oh uh like that's actually like totally really good t'know. like don't get me wrong, it's a tried and true trope, it’s like a staple of the genre, it's cool in like fanfic and stuff but yeah it doesn't really seem logical or like… practical. Like if anythin’ it should be a sedative." they appreciate the rambling, it's welcomed and something they relate to. it's half the reason gen chose a podcast format over video. the other half being that video would have been impossible.

it's cute as well, he seems nervous, and they think about giving him the sparknotes of their monster story but, he's moving on, and they wish they had their notebook handy. it's all fascinating information and she's paying close attention.

she smiles when he makes eye contact, it's minimal and soft, and nods. a small i'm listening go on hopefully communicated through it. "fine, fine, like scouts honor i won't try and brave it out but seriously buck i will be fine. just trust me. i trust you , okay?" her tone is sincere and honest, there's something hidden in it, but what that thing is gen doesn't know. it isn't fear, they know that much at least. it's more like a deeper trust than they're aware of, it's not the time to dig into it and dissect it, it can wait. 

gen watches him, trying to not let their stare be too intense, they're just curious and don't want to come off as disinterested or only doing this out of annoyance with his dozing. he really does look rough, it's been bugging them most of the night and they'd wanted to say something earlier but kept pushing it off, not wanting to seem overbearing. pushing him away isn't something they want to do, and not just because it would mean losing one of the best parts of this whole project. 

the thought slips away when she feels a pinch, her hand is balled into a fist like she's actually giving blood and she relaxes it, flexing her fingers gently. they'll add it to their personal list of shit that should probably hurt way worse , though why it doesn't could be due to any number of factors. from the fact that she's had previous practice with getting blood drawn to the whole... whatever their deal is thing.

or it could be because he's being extra careful and gentle. gen doesn't know and it's not really a burning question she's eager to ask about. at least, not yet. it's going on the list, though, as soon as she can write it down.

she bites at her lip as he drinks, feeds, whatever the term is and hopes that he'll be okay. he's not melting or crumbling, which gen takes as a good sign. he's also not coughing it up which has to be a really good sign. then, they notice his movements shifting in speed and energy, and they tilt their head, holding back from getting closer, realizing that he probably needs some space. they pull back and suddenly...he's out and she freezes.

　　"....fuck, please like, don't be dead. again. like please just be passed the fuck out. like, i totally wanna tease you 'bout this later and it'd really fuckin' suck if i couldn't."

gen has no idea how to check and make sure he isn't gone gone, but there's a peacefullness to his face, they think there is at least. she waits a few beats before moving, eyes not leaving him as she does. 

they move quickly, first grabbing a blanket from the pile on the chair she's been sitting in and draping it over him, tucking the corners under him gently. there's a bag in her room, stuffed with tissue paper and a gift she had fully planned on giving to him later, but it's oddly perfect for the moment and she can't resist the opportunity to be soft. while they don't want to leave him alone in case he suddenly comes to, it's only for ten seconds max.

gen dashes in and out of rooms, snatching the gift and returning in record time. she takes extra care to not rustle the paper too much, they don't know how light a sleeper... rester... passer outer (exact terminology of whatever the fuck he’s doing is just something she'll have to ask about when he's back on earth) he is and they really don't want to disturb him.

an orange and black stuffed bat wearing a firefighter outfit is pulled from the bag and placed against him, and they'll have to explain how if he presses the right hand the intro notes to decode will start playing. they'd panicked on what to make as a sound, the stock bat screech had sounded too sharp, and she'd gone with the first thing to come to mind.

　　"hey, buck, if you can hear me, like, at least give me a sign of like, not really life but like... fuck i dunno i just like, i need to know if i should be freakin' out more than i am right now. like in general, i probably should be with most things, but like this is totally uh, a very specific thing. maybe i am already freakin' out. just like, don't be dead? or like, dead-er?"

she sighs and settles back into her chair, pulling her laptop onto her lap, and grabs her headphones from the table. they have a few episodes they need to do some edits to and figure it's a sign that they should go ahead and start. Her focus can’t seem to pull away from buck for too long, and ends up stuck on him for longer than it should. “i'll explain what you're probably gonna be askin' me, i promise, just like, please don't get pissy that i didn't tell you sooner? Or like, maybe just don’t remember this at all.” They still dont know if he can hear but it’s said more for herself than him.

[bokutosmochi]

random akaashi keiji headcannons chapter II

what's it? general

allergen warning/s? n/a

sugar level? 0.6k

regulars? @hanayanetwork​

♧ journals a lot, but especially when he's stressed. there's something about the ripping of the paper and the gluing of the photos that makes him so relaxed. he thinks it's the asmr, or maybe it's the feeling of doing the process, or maybe it's the way he's writing his feelings down and not bottling it inside him, or maybe it's all of it.

♧ idk if it's not obvious enough, but he is the mom friend. if his friends are going out drinking, he's the one who's going to stay sober for the night -- the designated driver. also he has everything one might need when going out -- tissues, lipbalm, bandaids, alcohol, paracetamols, even pads/tampons if he's with his girlfriend.

♧ likes flower pressing. he puts some of his work on his journal to decorate them, and some are on frames hung up in his apartment.

♧ if he was on tiktok, he would 100% be on booktok or anything similar to that. despite being on the app for a longer time than what he cares to admit, he's a little clueless when it comes to those tiktok text pranks because of that.

♧ worked at a coffee shop once when he was fresh from graduating college and looking for a job. he honestly really enjoyed it and if money wasn't an issue, he probably would have stayed a barista for a long, long time.

♧ always sleeps with a nightlight on. though the night in general does unsettle him to a degree, it's not really the reason for it. the actual reason is because sometimes, he'll wake up randomly at four am and get a random idea for the poetry book he's currently writing. it's there so there'll always be some light in his room whenever he finds himself reaching for the notebook and pen on his bedside table before the idea and inspiration disappears.

♧ has an eye for interior design and fashion, he just chose to not pursue it.

♧ an overachiever. definitely an overachiever. experienced burnout a lot, but like how he used to help bokuto whenever he got into his emo mode, the former captain of fukurodani's boys volleyball team is able to get him out of a funk as well.

♧ really bad at flirting with people he doesn't like, but people get crushes on him often -- especially girls because of him being respectful and educated. he's the cute, quiet, smart person at the back of the class who always smells good and is ready for everything -- pop quiz? aced it. the girl beside him snapped her hair tie? he knew buying that pack in the discount bin of the hundred yen store would come in handy. someone scraped their knee? of course he has bandaids.

♧ doesn't get crushes on people often. however, when he does, he ends up falling head over heels for them. often times, his crushes are they even just crushes at this point? lasts for years.

♧ overthinks questions a lot, especially if it's some kind of important social issue. he likes discussing multiple sides of the story, looking at each's pros and cons, if one outweighs the other.

♧ related to the last headcannon, he doesn't make an opinion about said important societal issue if he's not educated about it. he's very confused as to why people do so.

♧ doesn't exactly think he's smarter than other people, he just thinks other people don't think enough -- they make decisions and voice out their opinion without actually thinking it through logically.

♧ a minimalist. his apartment's walls are just a plain white color with some gold-colored decoration here and there. he has quite a few succulents though, and most of his lighting there is natural, giving it a very home-y feel.

♧ really doesn't like going to college parties. it makes him really uncomfortable and usually just overwhelms him because of all the flashing lights and people around him and the obnoxious music playing and what is that smell? he'd rather stay at home and read a book, maybe get a head start on his creative writing paper due next month.

i get: reblog

you get: a book of poems

[floraltypes]

Old Beginning Pt. 2

pairings - aaron hotchner x reader, jethro gibbs x reader

chapters - one 

summary - the news of a dinner party arrises, but there are some little challenges before the actually night

wc - 3k

an - sorry this took awhile, my summer is over and my writing schedule will be a little wonky now. i’m taking a break from answering requests, so I apologize if I haven’t answered yours, but i eventually will

Penelope and you both looked back at Aaron, taken back by his repeating of the word ‘boyfriend’. You didn’t plan on telling people so soon, considering he was your boss from your old line of work.

“I want to know everything about him, you have to invite him!” Penelope quickly went back into her loud chatting, attracting other faces at her comment. “I also may have mentioned to some of the team that you do have a boyfriend, it just slipped! You know I can’t keep secrets!”

“It’s okay, Pene,” You smiled softly. “I can’t invite him though, you know, since I’m not the one holding the dinner event.”

“You can invite your partner, everyone else can as well, considering it is a catch up,” Dave walked over, a cup of coffee in his own hand as he used the other to scratch at his stubble. “I’ll even invite the woman I’ve been seeing. Feel free to all bring a plus one, I have enough room and everyone deserves a taste of my Italian dishes, will change their lives.”

“Thank you, Rossi, but I simply can’t. It’s so soon, and he’s such a busy man,” You laughed, waving your hand. “It was a kind gesture though.”

“L/n, don’t tell us you’re embarrassed to show your new boyfriend to us?” Derek walked back over, poking your shoulder. “Penelope told all of us down here, just wanted to wait and see when you would tell us.”

“I’m not embarrassed, that’s absurd. He’s truly busy.”

“Invite him, I’ll make sure Will comes and hire a babysitter for Henry, so that we can truly have a adult night,” JJ chuckled. “Everyone is bringing a date, so it would be odd if you didn’t.”

“Actually, I don’t have a partner at the moment due to how invested I am in my studies and the factors of that many young woman my age only focus on the factor of conventional attractiveness rather then the complexity of brains and deep-”

“Don’t worry, Spencer, if you don’t have a date, then I’ll just bring two,” Emily joked. “You don’t need a date, I’m not bringing one either, but Y/n is for sure.”

“I’ll be like the tw-”

“You are dating someone, we aren’t, so you’ll bring that someone. Come on, L/n,” Emily continued on, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. “I’ll walk you out,” She turned back to wink at her coworkers, leading you to the elevator and soon the parking lot.

“Aaron,” Rossi looked towards his friend, a man who had his glare fixated on your exiting figure. “Will you bring Beth, the more the merrier.”

“Yeah, I suppose I will,” He answered, retrieving his cellphone from his pocket, pulling up her contact picture, thumb hovering over the call button. “Let’s finish up this work, so we call all get home.” He shoved it back in his pocket, commanding everyone else while moving back up the stairs to his office.

Meanwhile, you were outside of your car, looking at Emily still was right by your side.

“Bring your boyfriend,” She commented, watching as you fished for your keys and unlocked your car. “I want to meet him, I haven’t really talked to you in a long time.”

“We’re both so busy. Him as well.”

“Seriously, Y/n, I’m not gonna ease up on you. I’ve noticed the new tint in your eye, new considering the last time it was severely dulled. It’s amazing to see your real smile again, you closer to your old self despite the past losses. He really has helped you, so I want to meet the man who helped my dear friend so much.”

You contemplated her kind words, getting down to the point that everyone probably was happy to see you again, yourself physically and mentally.

“I’ll call him, see if he can come. Can’t promise anything, his work is very important to him, so if it needs him he’s there.”

Emily smiled widely, leaning over to kiss your cheek before you moved to open the front door and start your car.

“Great, I’m actually bringing someone. Poor Spencer might be the only one.”

“Aaron is as well?”

“Hotch, yeah,” She laughed. “Meet her at some track meet he had, Jack really likes her.”

“That’s good, I’ll see you soon then,” You smiled, shutting the door as Emily watched you back out, waving a small goodbye.

Leaving the facility, while at a stop light, you found your flip phone, finding the contact of Jethro and quickly dialing the number.

“Gibbs,” He answered.

“Hey, are you on a case?”

“No, are you driving?”

“Yes, safely. What are you doing? Building a boat,” You chuckled, imagining him in the basement with the tool and sweaty shirt.

“Yeah. Did you meet up with your old team today?”

“Mhm, all surprised to see me today. It was humorous in a sense. But, Rossi invited me and everyone to a dinner, telling us to bring a partner.”

“Who are you planning on bringing?”

“You.”

“So, we’re being more public with our relationship?”

“Just with the old team, my old team, they don’t have contact with anyone apart of NCIS, or at least not personal only professional.”

“I thought you were going to come and see me, instead of making me drive,” You could almost sense his smile on the other line, a mocking one.

Gibbs would obviously accept the offer, the man truly holding a strong affection for you, a soft spot personally for you, so he would agree to drive the hour or two.

But just because he would, it doesn’t mean he didn’t have to mess around a bit, act like he wouldn’t.

“I know, but then you can see my new apartment. And after this weekend, who knows when we’ll be able to see each other again. Both of our jobs involved sporadic cases that start and end at no specific time, hard to plan around. And, everyone is pressuring me to meet you.”

“I’m already popular, huh?”

“I suppose,” You huffed, rubbing your temple, exhaustion starting to take over you, wanting to get some rest, a calming bath to combat earlier feelings that seemed as if they were creeping up once again.

“I’ll come, don’t worry. Get home safe, call me when you have the address and date.”

“Okay, bye.” You hung up, tossing the phone onto the empty seat as you continued to drive, playing the music from the CD already inserted in your car.

Time leading up to the dinner seemed to fly by, especially considering that it wasn’t much time and you weren’t having to work. You decided to take the free time to get fully settled in, figure out your nerves, make a phone call to your therapist, and even read. Trying to get prepared for all the days that are to come.

Your hair was now being changed from its normal du to a new one, fancier in a sense. Applying a nice coat of makeup, new lip color, trying a new pallet and the old eyelash curler that hasn’t been used in a while, you finished ‘upgrading’ your face. A outfit was simple, considering you didn’t have many fancy ones, so with not much to choose, it was a quick decision.

Sliding that on and fixing the straps to be a bit tighter, messing with the bra to fit correctly, and pulling it down a bit, you grabbed your go to purse, shoving needed materials a into it as you moved to the kitchen.

Within the kitchen, there was a certain door within the wall of the pantry with a password. Quickly typing in the combination the door swung open, choosing between a small but handy knife, you put in the pocket of your bag.

You weren’t too worried about dangers at the dinner, but with years of catching/fighting murders, specific people after you, and even very powerful assassins, you carried certain weapons for safety.

Hearing the sturdy knock of someone’s knuckles on your front door, you rushed to shut the the secret door in the pantry, heading to your front door where someone was waiting.

A quick peak through the hole, your eyes widened in surprise and opened the door, allowing the man to walk in.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you, till uh, later tonight,” You mentioned, looking him up and down to see him more dressed up. “Are you not able to attend anymore?”

“No, I’m still going,” Hotch denied, sliding off his shoes and following you to the couch. “I just wanted to chat before than, a chance for just the two of us.”

“Is something wrong?” You walked over to your teapot, filling it with water, and placing it on your stove, heating up the water. “This is very unexpected.”

“Nothing is wrong. I just want to talk to you, see the apartment, hear what’s new with you.”

“Things,” You shrugged. “Obviously I’ve had a new job experience, similar in ways and also not. Grew closer with a new group of teammates, people, lost a few. Yeah, lost a few,” You repeated, remembering Jenny Shepard, even Kate, both amazing women, who did amazing things.

“That’s always hard, I guess my most recent loss was Haley,” Aaron hummed, soon the kettle making a high pitched noise, you rushing to take it off and grab some tea bags.

“She was also a amazing woman. Wonderful mother, cared so much for that little boy.”

“She really was.”

“Did you come to chat about her, it’s been a while since we had. Last time we really talked was five months after she passed, after the funeral.”

“It really has been that long?” Aaron questioned, taking the tea that you time handed him. “But it’s not the reason I came. I should have made more of a effort to keep in touch, after your transfer, after your loss.”

“You stayed with me for three months, allowing to lose some time with your son so you could change my dirty sheets and pick up all my snotty tissues,” You laughed, sitting down across from him with your own cup. “You had to get back to your family, make up for loss time.”

“You still helped me with my divorce during that time, and I still saw Jack,” He reminded you.

“I could’ve moved in with my father, but you allowed me not to do that.”

“Your father is a good man, but might not be the best to live with,” He laughed, a deep chuckle, something you didn’t see much. “You look nice.”

“Now you just notice,” You chuckle, taking another sip. “Thank you, you look nice as well. I was actually just going to call Jethro and tell him to meet me there, a bit of a drive and he isn’t happy about having to find a new team,” You spoke freely, feeling comfortable with the old friend, one you used to spill everything to years ago, him ranting to you too.

“Jethro? He has his own team? Sounds like a boss of some type.”

“Uh, technically. It’s complicated. I need to get going, to make it to the dinner on time and, finish, um, cleaning up my room before leaving.”

“I could take you there.”

“No thanks, I’ll see you there, bye.” You helped guide him to the door, a curt wave before he exited and shut it, locking it in a rush and moving back to the dining room table to clean the mugs.

You didn’t want to tell him all that, always insecure due to Gibbs being the prior boss of you and how people looked at that. Rumors were always spread about your and Aaron’s relationship, mostly about it being romantic.

Joining the team, you two easily hit it off due to your personalities. Always being filled with determination and stubbornness, refusing to give up till everything was done and right, even with files. Eventually you joined together, talked, spent most days with each other due to cases, and truly gained a very close friendship.

When rumors were getting around, glares were thrown your way, comments, left out by members who weren’t your immediate teams. People thought you were the cause of Haley and Aaron’s divorce, somehow word got around quickly, drama always does.

It was frustrating, already dealing with many different things at home, and even being in a relationship, it put so much unneeded stress and anxiety onto you.

So, getting into a relationship with Gibbs was a very reluctant thing on your part, he expressed his feelings first, but it was hard to accept them, despite the nerves he faced to do it.

Locking up the apartment, having all of your items with you, you made your way out the door and too your car, starting the drive to David’s house.

Upon arriving, you could hear light chatter in the home, lights on, and soothing music playing in the background. It sounded like everyone was having their fun, you couldn’t make out all the shadows of everyone indoors, just waiting outside for Jethro to arrive.

“Y/n?” You turned around at the sound of his voice, keys jingling in his hands as he walked up to you with a sly smile, shoving them in his pockets to place his arms around your waist. “What’s wrong, love?” Be snaked them around, a kiss to your somewhat clothed shoulder.

“Nothing, just a bit nervous to introduce you to everyone,” You smiled back at him, he squeezed a little tighter, catching your lips in a quick kiss. “Looking at your team, yet?”

“Nevermind that,” He grumbled, removing his hands to now interlace your left one with his right. “We should go in, right?”

“Maybe we could head back, to my place, say you are sick or something?” You looked back at him with a pleading look, to which he just chuckled at, starting to move to the front door, pressing the doorbell as you groaned a little.

“You’ll be fine,” He looked back at you as Rossi answered the door, cheerful smile on his lips, glass of scotch in hand as he moved out of the way to let you in.

“Ah! Y/n!” He cheered, leaning over to kiss your cheek and then pulled back. “Glad you made it! This must be…”

“Y/n! Oh where is the man?” Penelope rushed in, coming right by you with her own fruity drink, then leaning to whisper in your ear. “Is this him, oo!”

“Uh, Jethro that’s David,” You pointed to the man who first greeted you, him and Jethro shaking hands. “This is Penelope, the one kind of like Abby,” You smiled, as she gave you a little look, turning back and enveloping him in a little hug. She quickly turned back to you.

“He looks a little intimidating,” She whispered as you just laughed.

“For sure,” You nodded.

“Can I offer you a drink?” David turned to you two, gesturing to the one in his hand. “Something like Garcia for you Y/n, and what about you Jethro?”

“Just call me Gibbs, and yeah that’s fine,” He corrected Rossi, taking your hand as the two of you walked more inside of the magnificent house.

It truly was so well designed, very expensive, and the appetizers adorning the oak wood table looked very delicious. You wanted to go and grab a bite, before you were actually led to the living room where everyone was currently sitting.

“L/n, finally made it,” Derek laughed, beer in his hand as he pointed at you with a little chuckle. “You always know how to be a bit late.”

“Fashionably late, I believe that’s what it’s called,” JJ corrected them with her own wine glass in hand, Will sat right besides her on one of the couch as most of them in that room joined in laughter.

“What can I say?” You laughed, walking over, feeling less nervous with the factor of introducing your boyfriend, taking a seat on another couch in the large room, Jethro automatically sitting right besides you.

“So, introduce us,” Emily motioned over to Jethro, sly smile playing on her lips.

“This is Jethro, but he goes by Gibbs, and, uh, this is the team,” You started to name everyone off while pointing to them, leaving off a few names due to your members introducing their own partners to you.

Emily, Derek, and JJ had all brought partners. Spencer and Penelope decided to ‘go together’ as if they were partners, and Hotch hadn’t arrived yet. Rossi also had his girlfriend helping him cook in the kitchen, making drinks for you and Gibbs now.

“So, you work at NCIS, right?” Spencer questioned. “The Naval Criminal Investigative Service, very interesting considering the type of crimes you investigate. I would love to hear more about some of your cases and how you went about it,” Spencer smiled, a small notebook being pulled out of his pocket with a pen.

“Yeah,” Gibbs just nodded, looking at you a little questioning, which you just chuckled at.

“Why should we talk so much about work, it’s something we all do too much of,” You joked, everyone laughing, as Dave came back out, handing some drinks.

“Fine, fine, what do you do for fun Mr. Gibbs?” Derek asked, putting a arm over the couch and pulling his girl closer to his side, the woman just on her phone.

“I like to build boats, a type of hobbie I’ve been doing for years.”

“Building boats? Where?” Will wondered, intertwining his fingers with JJ.

“My basement, a private workspace.”

“How do you get it out then?” Penelope inquired, now back by Spencer and her face in her hand, leaning closer to show her interest in Gibbs statement.

“I’d be no fun if you knew that,” He shrugged, taking a drink with a small smile as Penelope gasped, Emily mouthing how ‘I like him’. It was sweet how everything was going well.

They all continued to converse with Gibbs, easily accepting him apart of the conversation, it was sweet and you were now on your second drink, practically all nerves gone.

“Sorry we’re late,” A voice mentioned in the hallway, dressed in a fine suit with a beautiful woman standing besides him. He shrugged off the last of his coat as he hung it up, taking her hand and walking into the hallway a little.

“This is such a nice place, Aaron. Oh! Your friend, wow, so grand,” The woman admired, now truly getting in your line of sight.

“Yeah,” He mumbled, eyes interlocking with yours before falling onto Gibbs. “I’m Aaron, call me Hotch.”

“I’m Gibbs,” Your boyfriend stood up, moving over to the other man with his hand stuck out. “Call me that.”

You had a feeling this evening wouldn’t be as smooth as you hoped.

——————

taglist - @wolviesbabes @hotch-meeeeeuppppp

(comment to be added, or a tag list for all my gibbs post)

[wamulu-gorillaz]

I love your imagines and I was wondering if i can get ace and murdoc ( separately ) with a crush or s/o who is an errand girl or assistant to the band who is kind hearted and adorkable but gets very flustered around them and stutters a lot? Also gets nosebleeds if they get teased or flirted with by the green boys? I love those two 😩💕💕💕💕

I cannot tell you many times I started this request only to have it disappear when I accidentally closed the tab... my GOODNESS. Also I’m sorry that it took so long to get this one out. I hope you enjoy!

Ace’s Crush:

Listen - he absolutely melts inside every time you go near him but he’s very, very good at keeping it calm and suave. He flirts subtly, might flex a bit when you’re around... but

This one time yours and his fingers touched ever so slightly when you handed him a coffee. A surge of electricity shot through his veins and he nearly dropped the cup.

In that moment, you were both a flustered mess and his face flushed with a pinkish glow. This was probably the moment you realised that you were both more alike than you’d previously thought

The first nosebleed, he definitely panicked over! He made a little flirtatious comment and then BOOM - your nose started gushing. All the colour drained from his face and he didn’t stop apologising for a long, long time

His day is always immediately made better when he hears you’re working 

You maybe once overheard a conversation where Noodle was trying to encourage a nervous Ace to ask you out... To which he responded “I dunno, Noods... they get nosebleeds every time they come near me... That’s like a bad omen or somethin’. A surefire way t’ tell they hate me.” (Noodle roles her eyes because he’s obviously stoopid)

Ace’s S/O:

He never asks anything from you while you’re working. In fact he almost becomes YOUR assistant by being the one who fetches YOU hot drinks

If he does ask you for anything, he will always make sure to return the favour by getting you something as well

ONLY ever flirts with you when he has tissues handy. He never wants to make your nose bleed on purpose but MY GOSH the way you get all flustered makes him fall more and more in love with you

When the two of you get home at the end of a long day, he knows you’ve been doing most of the work so he’ll rush to get a bath running for you and start cooking dinner - he’s always making sure that you know how grateful he is for you (even though you get paid to be helpful bahaha)

If you’ve ever felt insecure or worried about what he thinks of your stutters, I want to remind you that he’s so, so patient and gives you the time you need to get your words out. Growing up, his best friend had a speech impediment so he’s knows a little of what you go through

You two getting flustered or embarrassed over being hesitant to show physical affection while at work is the most awkward and painful thing to watch hehehe

Murdoc’s Crush:

Unlike Ace, any excuse to see you means that he’s always getting you to do things for him - even things like ironing his underwear before an interview

The first time your nose bled, he took off his shirt and used it to help clean it up. He wasn’t phased at all and loved the opportunity to show off 

He always seems to be slightly more pleasant when you’re around - like he’s making an effort to make you think he’s not a total jerk

When you get all flustered he uses the excuse that he gets it all the time from his fans *hair toss* 

HAS ACTUALLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD TO ONE OF YOUR ADORKABLE JOKES - SNORTED, EVEN

He wasn’t even embarrassed about it - he admitted proudly and boasted about how you were able to make him laugh while people who’ve known him for decades (the rest of the band) have barely been able to do that

Murdoc’s S/O:

If he asks you to fetch a coffee (or rum) for him, you can bet he will ambush you with kisses when you come to deliver it

Gladly shows you off to the rest of the crew and to all the celebrities he interacts with 

Once gifted you a WHOLE BUNCH of embroidered handkerchiefs for your nosebleeds (which came into use pretty much straight away)

An onlooker would probably shake their head at Murdoc who seems to be making fun of your stuttering but... the truth is, you’re both stuttering messes and he really loves that about the two of you - you just sound like you’re talking wobbly bobbly

I’m not sure whyyyyy but I just have this headcanon that your adorkable puns turn him on okay? okay

Whenever you get all flustered or overwhelmed, he reminds you that he’s there for you by entwining his fingers with yours. Sometimes it works... sometimes the sweet act makes you even more flustered bahaha

[nm70444]

A Stressful Evening - Javier Pena

Tags - Javier Pena, Fluff, Smut, Pedro Pascal, Domination

You knew Pena wasn’t one for commitment. He was married to his work, every case he worked on and solved he believed gave him more satisfaction than companionship. You seen the way he flirted and hooked up with women to just throw them away like a used tissue the morning after. But no matter what you saw of Pena you could help but wonder what was beneath the surface of him. Surely this was all a front, and he couldn’t be fulfilled with his current life?

You had worked at the DEA for around 6 months now.  You father worked with DEA in Colombia since you were little however in a drowning sea of college debt and failed jobs you decided to join him in search of a comfy position. You were just the administrator meaning you were invisible to the other men, only handy when they needed another cup of coffee or an ass to grope to release their ‘stress’. All the men in the office were the same old Colombian men who went out, drunk, cheated on their wives and done the bare minimum of work. However, Murphy and Pena caught your eye, mostly Murphy’s inability to string together a single sentence in Spanish caught your attention but apart from that they seemed genuinely interested in their jobs. You had seen them in the office over the last few months and they were the only two men to treat you like an actual human, they didn’t touch you or talk to you like you were below them. You felt safe in their company.

You wouldn’t think in the midst of the search for Pablo Escobar there would be so much paperwork? You had put in so many long evenings in the office doing everything for the men that you knew were having the nights of their lives. You think of all your girlfriends back in the US probably partying tonight and living their best lives with the most amazing jobs in the world, why could that be you? There was no reason to think about that, your chase form the “American Dream” was over and you were back in Colombia to reality.

As you are putting away all the files from the day, you hear muttering coming from one of the offices. You go to check the clock “22:45pm”. Usually, you are the only person in the office this late? You decide to take further inspection as after all, there is so much classified information in this building, if one of Pablo’s little workers got in and took anything away it would cost the DEA big time. As you peer into the office you see Pena sat there, his cigarette ash is growing long, and he grunts looking over evidence from the case. You think about walking away but your eyes lock, there’s no way to escape the awkward conversation you can feel away to happen. You never told anyone in the office this, but you secretly had a little crush on Javi since you arrived. I mean how could you not he was the most attractive man in the office, you were too scared to initiate anything and as you knew he was a guy used to one-night affairs and not long commitment.

“Y/N what are you still doing here?” he says, this is one of the first times he spoken directly to you not in a passing by or a quick question about paperwork. “You wouldn’t believe it but in your search for Pablo there is a lot of work for other people to do as well” you say, you didn’t plan on sounding like such a dickhead, but it was late, and you may as well get your frustration out now. You see his facial expression change, like he’s happy to be in your company. “Pull up a chair and have a drink with me, you seem like you’ve had a long day” he says, you weren’t usually one to drink when you have to drive but after the day you had you decided to just do it. He pulled out a bottle of whiskey that you could see had been in there a while, like he has saved it for a special occasion. “What are you doing here so late?” you say, “I presumed you’d be out drinking and flirting like all the other guys in the office.” “You peg me like every other person in this office Y/N?” he says, sending a stiffness down you body, the way he said it felt so dominant however you felt so comfortable in his company. “If you must know this case is getting a lot tougher and Murphy seems to be slacking so I’d get prepared for more long nights” he states in a more frustrated tone, like he needs a stress-free evening to relieve himself. You hadn’t been laid in around 3 months when you were so deeply depressed that you walked into a Colombian bar and pretty much slept with the first man you saw, an evening you thoroughly regret. It had been so long for you that you started to think about being one of Pena’s evening conquests, after all you never talked in the office so what harm could it do. “Oh that wouldn’t be so bad” you say, trying to turn the conversation more flirtatious. He picks up on this, “Shouldn’t you be out with your boyfriend this evening?” he asks. “Please what man am I going to find in this drug riddled, boring area of the country that isn’t either working for Escobar or is involved in some form of crime ring” you state. “We are a rare breed” he replies “Do you want to get out of here and go back to mine for a drink, I would say go to a bar but with all that is going on with Escobar I fear it is not safe” he asks. You have a feeling you know where the night will lead you however you were tantalized by him, he looked so strong and unbreakable, but you liked a challenge and wanted to see how easy it would be to crack him.

You get in his car, its old but he has such control of it that you feel safe. When you pull up to his house, he climbs out the car and opens the door for you, you never expected this type of chivalry from his, maybe he will be easier to crack than you think? When you walk into the apartment and can tell it’s the typical bachelor pad but with case files scattered all over, he goes to open the fridge which not to your surprise is just carrying beer, he pulls two out for you and him. You sit yourself on his sofa and just think of all the brain-dead bimbos he’s probably had on this sofa that could not live up to you. You were a girl with a college degree and full potential, why couldn’t any guy see it?

“I’ve seen you around the DEA you know” he says, “I see the other guys treat you like crap and I should have intervened, I wanted to, but I was afraid to start talking to you, I’m sorry.” “You don’t have to apologise, I knew what was going to happen when I took this job, that why I tried to leave Colombia and make it in America, but I always knew I’d end up back here” you say as you take a large swig on the beer. You can tell the booze is starting to hit him, his confidence is growing but he is becoming more open at the same time. “You’re so gorgeous Y/N, guys here are such dicks and you don’t deserve it” he says. In the last 6 months you’ve been back home he’s the first one to truly feel comfortable, you see his eyes wander down to your lips and further to your chest. He slides closer. Your eyes then wander down to his lap, and it instantly catches your eye. You always presumed he was well-endowed but seeing it see of a firing feeling in your crotch like you needed it. The tension was high in the room, you want to pull away and avoid being one of his conquests, but your desire pulls you back. He grabs the back of your head and kisses you; you can taste the beer and cigarettes on his lips and usually this would be enough to make you turn away but on him it tastes sweet. You feel his fingers run through your hair and your bodies come closer. “You taste so sweet Preciosa, do you want this?” he asks, you aren’t even thinking straight anymore, as he runs his lips down your neck, sucking every last bit in an attempt to leave a lasting mark on you “Fuck yes Javi” you moan “Yes I want this”

The minute those words leave your lips he’s after your blouse, taking every button off while still after your neck and lips, like he’s locked to you and can’t leave. Removing your skirt and tights you feel yourself become weaker to his touch, you expect to take off his trousers next, but you can feel his head going straight for your crotch. “What are you doing?” you ask. “Treating you as you should be treated Mi Reina” he states, before you can even comprehend what is going on you feel the wetness of his tongue circling your clit, the sensations are something you’ve never felt before, the pleasure shooting up your legs like you were going to finish quick, but you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. Every lick was a new high, the combination of licking, moustache hairs along your cunt and his hands gripping your thighs was electrifying. You could feel your legs turn to jelly and he was determined to keep going until he was covered in whatever he could gather from you. “Keep going for me Nena” he says as he continues to do wet circles around your clit which is so sensitive now, you are gripping onto his hair, riding his face like a cowboy in a western movie. With every movement you feel yourself edging that bit closer. Eventually the feeling of it becomes too much, you feel pulsating electricity through every part of your body, you untense, wrapping your legs around his head. He isn’t done with you yet though. He licks up every last bit of you, coming right back to kiss you. As you comes back up you see how you’ve managed to make yourself around his moustache. You pull him closer till you feel his engorged lap against your wet crotch. “Your turn now baby” you say as you get on your knees.

You arrive to his belt, as you unbuckle it you can him tensing up like he’s been waiting forever for this moment. As you unzipped his trouser you can feel its girth, with a gentle pull of his trouser it springs up. You are shocked, it is larger than any you have ever seen, and you know you are going to have fun with this. You take his length into your mouth, carefully taking it all in slowly to ensure you keep him on edge for as long as possible, reminding him you are the one in control. You hear his grunt and moans, even the sound of him makes your legs go weak. You can feel every last vein on him, as you continue to take it in you feel his large hands pull your hair, everything he does makes you feel like a little schoolgirl under his command, the power dynamic he has over you works to his advantage as you seem to forget to be control and get lost in taking in every last inch of him. As he gets close to the edge you stop. “Save that for when you are inside me” you whisper in his ear. You hear a low moan come out his mouth like he can’t believe how he is being commanded.

You arrive on your back, locking intensive eye contract with him like your being held in questioning with him. As he enters you, you feel your legs tense up again knowing this is going to end with you begging for him as you lose any sense of control when he’s on you. As he gently thrusts back and forwards you don’t break eye contract. You have never felt so close to a person before, he’s so dominating, and a stereotypical testosterone loaded male but something about him makes you not want to leave. Every thrust he takes you feel yourself edging closer, your legs are slowly losing control and the electrifying pleasure through your body is giving you such a high that you forgot all the other stresses of your horrifying life and are so focused on this one guy, the one who until tonight you only even swooned over in secret and now, he’s inside you. As you are both getting closer you feel the tension rising, he is trusting harder like its his one and only job, his hands leaving marks in your legs. It eventually becomes too much for you and you let out a moan that just pleasures him even further, you feel your legs give in as you fall onto your back again. You quickly get back up to give him the pleasure he deserves, you take his cock back in your mouth and its not long before he’s all over your face, so overwhelmed he can’t even look you in the eye as you take in every last but of him like he did with you. You stand back up to face him, you make direct eye contract but something about him seems different, like all of his walls are done and you’ve finally cracked his code

“What are you doing this weekend?” he asks.

[rayadraws]

“Somehow you must not have heard all the bad things said about me.”“I’ve heard them all twice. But I’ll make my own judgments.” For Zombiemask plz and thank you : )

Ohoo! A first for me to write...

G-rated but canon typical level gore, pre-relationship, maybe mild WC spoilers?

Like herding cats. Uncooperative, mad, possibly-no-likely rabid cats, the lot of them. It seemed a requirement for the S-class heroes to be as awful as humanely possible. Beauto sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair. At least the meeting was finally over and he was all alone; a rare if temporary blessing.

That didn’t mean his work of the day was done. He had to write and submit the report, he had an´telephone interview in three hours and he’d fallen behind on his fan letters again, he should really spend at least an hour tonight to try to catch up. But at least he could allow himself a few minutes to himself right now. To breathe, to compose himself before reality came crashing back down. To enjoy the semi-darkness in the room. The more he changed, the more he seemed to enjoy the comfort of darkness.

He stood up, eyes closed, taking another deep breath, only to jump at an unexpected rattling cough in the room.

Beauto startled and looked around for the source. There, in the far, darkest corner sat Zombieman, frowning, one of his trademark cigarettes sticking out of his mouth, looking straight at him with those dead eyes. Beauto should reprimand him for smoking inside the Hero Association’s pristine meeting room, but he’d had enough tonight trying to keep Metal Bat and Flashy Flash from ripping into each other over who had the best hair, as if it had anything to do with their job! He just couldn’t muster up the energy to start another argument. Not now.

”Why are you still here?” he just asked, instead.

Zombieman chewed on his cigarette, looking unblinking at him with an unreadable expression.

”You look tired,” was all he said in return.

”So do you, with those dark circles and pallid skin,” Beauto automatically countered.

Zombieman’s expression didn’t waver. ”Yeah, but I always look like this. You don’t.”

He straightened his jacket. ”I’ll be fine.” ’Thanks for worrying’, he didn’t add. He’d accepted his lot in life, even if it meant being disliked by everyone in this place. It was worth it, if it meant they could do what they needed to do.

”Hey,” Zombieman suddenly said. ”Wanna go get a beer?”

Beauto stared at him.

”I feel like shit and you look like shit, we’ll be a perfect pair,” Zombieman continued. He coughed twice, a deep, concerning cough, but at least he had the courtesy to cough into his elbow rather than across the table.

In a moment of weakness? Madness? Beauto agreed to the offer. He must be going insane, to agree to willingly hang out with one of them. But Zombieman waited patiently as he retrieved his coat - the inconspicuous one he used for undercover missions - as he put on his scarf and hat and sunglasses that he always kept in his desk.

”You allergic to sunlight or something?” he said, still chewing on the damn cigarette.

”I can’t be seen drinking in public.”

”Ah, yeah, the idol thing.”

As they started to walk down the lobby and his trenchcoat fell to the side, Beauto realized the probable reason Zombieman had stayed so still for so long, past the meeting even; he was missing a good portion of his torso. It looked almost like something very big had simply taken a large bite out of him.

In their profession, that was actually not unlikely. How he was still standing, nevermind walking, was beyond him.

Noting Beauto’s eyes on him, Zombieman pulled his coat tighter, hiding his horrifying injuries from view.

”I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

”How can you even walk like that? Don’t you feel pain?”

”I feel pain. Don’t worry. It’ll heal.”

Beauto knew it would, but it was still disturbing. He tore his eyes away. ”Lead the way.”

”Aye, cap'n.”

The walk was slow. Zombieman limped with every step, until Beauto had had enough and put his arm around him, helping him walk more steadily. At least this way if someone recognized him, he could use Zombieman as a way to avoid them. Out of the way, this man needs immediate hospital care!

”Such a gentleman,” Zombieman purred.

”You’re too slow, that's all.”

He was taken to a bar not far from the HA, only a couple of blocks away. The way no one paid them any attention, he suspected Zombieman must be a regular here. The suspicion was made even stronger when they were immediately led to a booth in the far back, the darkest corner without as much as a word.

Beauto approved and apparently Zombieman did too, still with the damned cigarette.

”They let you smoke in here?” he asked as they sat down. Zombieman just grinned at him.

”They’re bad for you, you know,” Beauto continued.

Zombieman removed the cigarette from his mouth. Only it… wasn’t. It was a god damn lollipop.

”That’s what the kid tells me too, you know.”

Gingerly he put the lollipop down on the table and flagged the server down for two beers.

It was, despite everything, not that bad. Beauto was trained in pleasant small talk. Almost on auto pilot, he asked Zombieman all the silly little questions. The man was… strange. His hero name was well earned, at least as far as looks went. But Beauto found that beneath it, Zombieman was pleasant enough to talk to. He didn’t seem to have any grand ambitions or plans, beyond being a good role model to Child Emperor, though he wasn’t entirely sure how he was doing. As for why he took Beauto to this place? ’You looked like you needed it’, apparently.

”But why would you care?” he asked, too tired to keep up any charades.

”Isn’t that part of being a hero? Caring about everyone. ’Sides, you seem pretty cool.”

”Cool?” Beauto snorted. That didn’t fit with what he usually heard from his colleagues. Arrogant, stuck up, nothing but a pretty boy, jealous, evil…

“Somehow you must not have heard all the bad things said about me,” he replied.

Once again, he felt those red eyes squarely on himself. Unblinking and unwavering.

”I’ve heard them all twice. But I’ll make my own judgments.”

Beauto tried to meet his gaze, failed and looked down. Watched his perfectly manicured fingers resting on the worn wooden table, full of dents and scrapes.

”Thank you,” he muttered.

A small eternity passed.

”Hey,” Zombieman suddenly said. He took a deep swig of his beer and lifted the edge of his coat. Beauto glanced up, not sure he wanted to see that gross injury a second time. But instead his eyes fell on soft skin. It was pale and somewhat sickly-looking, like all of Zombieman’s skin (what he'd seen, anyway), but it was perfectly smooth, not even a visible scar.

Seeing him gawk, Zombieman pulled his coat even more aside, revealing that there was still some healing to happen near the bottom. But it was a flesh wound now, opposed to a large chunk of him just… gone. It was a marvel, quite frankly.

Beauto made an effort to close his open mouth.

”That’s… fascinating, I suppose.”

”It does come in handy. Most people do heal, though. Just slower than this.”

”’Most people’ can’t re-grow missing tissue.”

”True.” Zombieman looked thoughtful as he put the lollipop back into his mouth.

”What about you?”

For a brief moment, Beauto went cold.

”What about me?” Had he let his facade slip? Was Zombieman on to him?

”You done here?”

He breathed a sigh of relief. ”Yes. Sure.”

He offered to pay, but Zombieman insisted on paying for them both.

”Almost sounds like you took me out on a date,” Beauto joked as they left. Zombieman was walking normally again, now. It was good to see.

He chuckled. ”Me, ask Sweet Mask out on a date? As if I’d dare.”

”Well. It wasn’t… it wasn’t terrible.”

”Really? In that case, it was a carefully planned date, carried out to perfection.”

Despite himself, Beauto laughed. Somehow, he felt lighter than before. ”Fine. It’s a date. Under one condition.”

”What’s that?”

”Next time, you let me pay.”

The red eyes sparkled, looking more alive than he’d ever seen them.

”Deal.”

[lexpressobean]

Thoughts on Kikaichu as actual Parasites.

Knowing how skin and the body generally works on a medical level, the "hive" aspect of the Aburame clan really drives me crazy. 'Cause parasites are real, obviously, but the size of Kikaichu beetles makes absolutely no sense in comparison to irl skin parasites. At least not in a bee hive sort of way lol

rambling because my mind craves logic and I'm specializing as a wound care nurse but it's literally anime so what do I expect lol

No, wounds don't freak me out, I'm more terrified of generally handling vomit and babies than I am a dehiscence of a 15cm long surgical site lol. The human body can literally take so much abuse before it really starts to give and try to alert you that you need help! And once you give it help, it really can come full circle to the wound 100% looking like it was never there. The body is an amazing thing <3

However the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the word "parasite" is always going to be "tapeworm". That's not gonna change. However, kikaichu are not worms and CERTAINLY don't grow that fucking huge or live that long. (A tape worm can live long enough to graduate with a fucking PhD. Can you believe?) I haven't been exposed to any urgent situations involving parasites yet, however, the one I would compare a Kikaichu to that is (unfortunately) also common is the scabies mite.

Very briefly, scabies mites (Sarcoptes scabiei) are technically a type of arachnid that grow no bigger than a bout 0.5mm in size, but CAN be seen with the naked eye if you're looking for them. They crawl around the skin and burrow specifically in the top layer of skin, called the epidermis. The epidermis is that protective layer of skin and can be between 0.5mm to 1.5mm thick depending on which part of the body you're looking at. After the epidermis, you have the dermal layer, which is where sweat glands, nerves, and capillaries are found. Scabie mites will not burrow that deep because they only burrow to lay their eggs and such. As they do this they can cause visible tunnels and other marks that can be mistaken for acne or other skin conditions if not properly identified. You'll most likely know because the itch is VERY BAD.

They're very easily spread by close contact and a scabies infestation needs to be treated with a prescribed pharmacological means.

However, kikaichu are definitely a lot bigger than 0.5mm. In the case of size, I would compare them at minimum to fruitflies/medflies, which grow up to 3-5mm and maximum to ladybugs 4-7mm.

3-7mm > 0.5-1.5mm... obviously. And the holes which Kikaichu swarm out of that the audience has seen before are about a size comparable Shino's nostrils, IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!

You're telling me those things were in his mouth?????????? S H I N O N O

That would mean, in realistic terms, the Kikaichu are fucking around in Shino's body to the bone and muscles and THAT'S A REALLY SCARY THOUGHT. Even just passing the epidermis to the dermis is alarming! Compared to the dry, protective epidermis that can and does take damage, the dermis can be 1-4mm thick depending on where you're looking and is where skin does it's business. All together that becomes 0.5-5.5mm of space BARELY big enough for a fruit fly do mess around in. It makes just enough sense in terms of THAT size, but last time I checked, having the skin penetrated to the dermal layer is just asking for infection to happen. You're first natural line of defense has been breeched, there's a pretty good chance you're gonna be bleeding (blood vessels) and general body fluids are going to be draining, which is bad for a multitude of reasons, and there's damage that gonna affect the nerves, and realistically this shit is going to be ABSOLUTELY painful if they're constantly manipulating those areas near nerves. These kinda of things CAN make new connections and things like that, sometimes damage is forever. (Case by case basis).

So my first thought to more or less "magically" solve the problem with anime logic, is that first of all, it's an anime and logic doesn't have to apply haha.

On a more sci-fi level, in which kikaichu are smaller than we've seen them shown, maybe they have been purposefully been allowed to burrow into the dermal layer of the skin at least because the blood vessels seem to be in direct contact with the chakra system. Kikaichu's prefered food is chakra, but they WILL mutiny and eat their respective Aburame from the inside out if they don't balance their chakra smartly. So it's safe to say Kikaichu are at least carnivorous as well, and so I only imagine these absolute nightmares would swarm their prey in the wild, and actively bite through and burrow into the body of the prey until they found the chakra system and went to town on that poor unfortunate soul. Eaten alive, how the hell did they "tame" them in the first friggin' place??

I like to think two things:

1) Kikaichu are passed down from parent to child, and the parent has control over the Kikaichu until they have been RIGOROUSLY trained for generations to comprehend that this baby/child isn't food, it's a new hive. If bees can comprehend time, Kikaichu can comprehend what an Aburame is. If they insist on trying to drain the babe or the babe just can't tolerate them, the parent takes the Kikaichu back and the babe is assigned another insect or position in general. Like hell they're gonna try to force a relationship like that.

2) As part of the successful symbiotic relationship, Kikaichu regularly debride the tunnels and borrows that they carve into their respective Aburame, and are naturally intuitive in avoiding as many nerves and blood vessels as possible. The chance of infection is never 0%, however, kikaichu are pretty good about taking care of their tunnels, and so it gives the Aburame more time to focus on their things, like increasing the amount if chakra in their system. To ensure that they stay healthy, Aburame are encouraged to eat as much protein and Vit C possible every day, whether it be meat, beans, lentils, eggs, oranges, tomatoes, or even supplements as times modernize. The dermis is living tissue and as long as debridement/tunneling is going on, it needs to be nourished as much as possible.

I don't know how the hell Aburame deal with the obvious drainage that would be coming from their bodies, assuming the dermal layer really is free game for the Kikaichu. But the magical solution is that... they don't? Because... drainage is minimal. The Kikaichu just do such a good job lol. Maybe they purposefully... carve entrances to be flappy, or they purposefully create pocket spaces underneath seemingly healed areas of skin to easily burst open when necessary. That's the biggest thing for me, leaking body fluids. There's no way around that shit besides straight up denial lol Maybe they wear a special kind of dressing underneath their clothes, or that's directly applied with their clothes. Maybe that's what that cute little backpack is filled with, who knows!!

Idk man. I'm sure the Aburame authority forces encourages many of their non-hive members to pursue medical nin training in order to give the clan more privacy in general too. All medics that claim the Aburame name are exclusively used by the Aburame Clan. A non-Aburame medic may end up healing tunnels and burrows that were meant to stay open because "oops" and now you have an X amount of insects possibly suffocating within a completely sealed pocket of the skin, and also now there's a very good chance that after those insects die, that whole area is gonna frickin' abscess and cause infection induced tunnels the longer it's left alone and GROSS THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN! THERE IS A DELICATE, ORGANIZED, SELF-SUFFICENT PROCESS TO ALL THIS!! A PROCESS!!!

Like... the other ninja in the NartVerse can make as many jokes, jabs, and comments about the Aburame as they please (INO? BITCH??? but to be honest I still love her lol). But these MFers are constantly playing Russian Roulette with these high maintenance demon spawn from hell, and there are VERY little defences against Kikaichu, virtually none. Like the only thing I've ever seen actively thwart Kikaichu across all media is killing them with mass fire, countering them with large amounts of poison gas (both very exterminator like) or literally just feeding them chakra until they're so stupid full, they can't move, the little gluttons. As far as genjutsu, it's been stated that it's both effective and ineffective, so idk about that. But the Aburame are just SO set up to be the living breathing embodiment of Shinobi as defined by the NartVerse. They're whole clan culture relies on the threat of enemies. If they have no enemies, the whole relationship is an exhausting endeavor for literally no reason. It's not worth it if there's no one to fight or protect! But when there is a threat, you want them on YOUR side.

I suppose the best bet is to incapacitate the Aburame individual asap and the Kikaichu will tend the individual, making escape easier. But, if you DID manage to kill that Aburame right away, that particular Aburame's swarm is now suddenly without its food source and without restraint.

What do you THINK is gonna happen, bro?? The second an Aburame loses their grip on their consciousness due to external influences, the bugs go bonkers because I'm pretty sure Kikaichu are simply persuaded to be in this relationship and have NO tolerance for bullshit like alcohol and overheating temps. If their Aburame dies, they probably cause just as much chaos as they would as a wild, unattended swarm. Then YOU BETTER HAVE fire or poison gas or SOMETHING handy. The only way to calm them down is to offer them chakra and a new host with equal or even more chakra reserves. Otherwise the mutineers must be eradicated.

And for serious... Like, any deeper and the kikaichu would be in the hypodermal/subcutaneous layer of the skin and that's where a lot of connective tissue is located. Let's NOT mess with that shit, shall we? NOT a good idea. It's called connective tissue for a reason first and foremost...

[neutron-stars-collision]

The Art of Inversion

Neil x Reader

Chapter 12 - A Little Death

Masterlist; Chapter 11

Summary: You have to help Neil get back onto his feet after the tragic news. The lack of control and overwhelming grief lead to a few revelations...

Warnings: This is quite angsty still despite mentions of comfort; excessive drinking; self-harm (only implied); swearing

Author’s Notes: Okay so the length of this is beyond me and I’m sorry. This takes place just before Neil’s departure to Mumbai, film-wise. I really hope you’ll enjoy and please let me know what you think!

P.S. The referenced song is ‘A Little Death’ by The Neighbourhood 

You did not check how long you were sat like that on the floor, cradling Neil and letting him cry and shake as though those were the only things he was capable of. Later you realised it was probably close to two hours as by the time you got up, it was nearly evening. But for those two hours, you just let him take his time. He did not speak, and you only occasionally whispered words of reassurance into his ear. You kept on drawing soothing circles into the skin of his back. After the first half-hour, you found a much-needed package of tissues and placed them in his lap. Despite his silence, you knew that your presence meant everything. And so you stayed, ignoring the rumbling in your stomach and tiredness. For the most part, you also ignored your own tears, fully aware that this was not about you, nor it should be.

Neil’s heart-wrenching sobs stopped after those two hours and were replaced with small gasps as though he was struggling for air. That is when you knew that the breakdown was past its culmination point. Slowly, you shifted so that you could look at him and gently tipped his chin. His eyes were puffy and red. The heart-breaking look he gave you was enough to nearly tip you off the edge. But you had to be strong. So you just took a deep breath and broke the silence:

“Don’t say you’re sorry for this because that’s the least I could have done for you” he nodded hesitantly upon seeing your determined gaze “I’m here for you, and I won’t make you talk about anything but sometimes it helps” you kissed him on the forehead.

When you met his gaze afterwards, you were struck by the admiration you saw there. He smiled at you slightly as though trying to convey something difficult to be expressed otherwise. You smiled back and took his hand in yours, giving it a comforting squeeze. After another beat, you got up and filled a glass of water for him. You knew well enough how something so simple is needed after crying for so long. You watched as he emptied the whole glass, placed it on the side, and took a deep breath. Then he spoke for the first time in two hours.

“I… I know that this isn’t what you’re used to from me” he shrugged helplessly.

“It doesn’t matter. You’re still someone I care about deeply” for a second you wondered why you felt like you wanted to say more.

But now was definitely not the time. So, instead, you added:

“Tell me what happened? If you’re ready, of course” you took his hand back and smiled when he entwined your fingers on reflex.

“When we arrived, he…” Neil swallowed hard “TP called us to his office and started explaining the next steps in the operation. He mentioned the bloody Mumbai and how I’m needed there tomorrow” he clenched his jaw, and you felt the tension rise.

You placed your free hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. Then you let your hand linger on the side of his neck. He sighed at your touch before resuming the story:

“Then he asked Ives to leave, and we talked a bit about everything… It was like the old days, you know” his brow furrowed “He mentioned how I’m probably his greatest friend in the whole world… How I helped him make Tenet into what it is now and how that wouldn’t be possible without my contribution” he exhaled shakily “We even talked about you” he glanced up and met your surprised look “Just about how it was seemingly fate that brought us together and how you fit in so well here, just taking everything in your stride” you smiled at the words shyly.

Even though it hurt you to know that he was not allowed the truth about your hiring. But maybe that was for the better, you mused.

“We talked like that for over an hour before he started acting strange… The things he said…” he seemed to gather words “It didn’t make much sense, but now I think I should’ve realised that he was…” he shuddered slightly “That it was supposed to be a goodbye” you saw the tears in his eyes again and shifted so that he could rest his forehead on your shoulder.

“Don’t blame yourself for not predicting what will happen. There’s no point in that�� you leaned against the foot of the bed behind to be more comfortable.

“Maybe… But I felt something was wrong, so an hour after I left his quarters, I went back in” you tightened the hold on his hand, feeling the moment approach “The door was unlocked and he… he was just sat there” Neil brought his head up to look at you with teary eyes “I thought that he was fine but then… there was no pulse, and he wasn’t breathing” you felt him become breathless and gently urged him to slow down.

When he stopped hyperventilating, you let him lean on your shoulder again.

“He died alone… and I couldn’t do anything about it” you were not sure if you preferred the dejected tone or the former sobs “I was supposed to be his best friend, his partner”

“I think that he didn’t want to hurt you even more by making you watch it happen” you suggested, trying to make sense of the situation.

After the earlier text and what Neil told you begun to understand that TP intended to do it. To end his life. You just had to find a reason why.

“But I don’t understand why he did it” Neil’s voice broke through your contemplation “There was no reason to… He said himself that the plan is going well” you could hear anger creeping into his voice.

“I know… But maybe there was a reason…” you trailed off.

Neil watched you sharply, and you felt like if you said something wrong, you could risk losing him again. You had to tread softly.

“You once said that he never did things without reasons” you stumbled over the tense and frowned “And that’s the same feeling I got when I talked with him… Maybe he had to do that to avoid clashing with his former self in any way” you glanced at Neil to gauge his expression.

He was staring ahead into space with a serious look in his eyes, considering what you said.

“Is like… they mentioned during training that it would be bad if we ever came in contact with our other selves, inverted and so on” you kept on rambling, hoping it was helping somehow “So maybe he was afraid that his existence now would coincide with his younger self out there”

“There must have been better ways of dealing with that” you could tell that he was angry.

At himself. At TP. At the universe. And there was nothing you could do.

“Maybe that was all that he could think of”

You watched helplessly as he turned away from you, suddenly overcome with the emotions. You urged yourself to calm down. Maybe now was a good moment to mention the text…?

“I… I got a text message from him actually… as I was getting here in the cab” you took out your phone and gingerly offered it to him.

Neil took it without question and read over the recent message. Then you saw his eyes dart to other text conversations. But you did not mind. There was nothing to hide. He handed you back the phone without a further word. Then he got up and wandered over to one of the side cabinets.

Now that was concerning.

“Neil?” you scrambled after him and watched in horror as he hastily threw the cabinet contents onto the floor.

Finally, he found a whisky bottle hidden in the back and took a triumphant swing out of it. That sight made you shake off any paralysis you fell into. You crossed the room and snatched the bottle from him. The dark look he gave you was somewhat terrifying. He took a step closer as you took one back. Then he met your gaze challengingly as though doubting your ability to deny him anything. But this time, you were not going to give in. You shook your head and extended the gap.

“It helps with the pain” Neil shrugged helplessly.

“I know, but I think you’ve had enough for today” you gestured towards the empty bottles on the floor.

Thinking fast, you decided to act. You took out your phone and summoned Ives, asking him to come by Neil’s room in a moment. He responded instantly, evidently waiting on the news. Once that was dealt with, you went on to pick up the reminders of Neil’s state. When he saw you do that, you heard him speak:

“If you’re going to take away all the alcohol, then at least leave me the empty bottles” you turned to see an unfamiliar cynical smile “The glass might come handy” the emptiness in his eyes made the delivery worse.

You could only stare, processing the words. Suddenly everything felt too overwhelming.

“Neil…”

You stared at him pleadingly, hoping that maybe the look of panic in your eyes will help him realise what he said. You did not dare breathe until he somehow denied your worst anxieties about the situation. You watched as his face fell, then he covered it with his hands and breathed out a long exhale.

“Fuck. I’m sorry…” he stared at the floor “I didn’t mean it” he looked up at you remorsefully “I don’t know why I said that…”

“It’s okay. Just don’t ever scare me like that again” you gave him a weary smile.

Before you could say anything more, a knock on the door interrupted you. At Neil’s quizzical stare, you answered:

“Ives. I’ve asked him to come” you moved to the door, clutching all the bottles in your arms “Give me a second. And please don’t do anything stupid” you gave him a final warning look before you exited into the corridor.

Ives waited there with a worried expression on his face that seemed fixed at this point.

“Is he alright?” he asked, glancing at the door you closed.

You shuddered, thinking about the situation you just dealt with. But he need not know all that.

“He will be. For now, though…” you placed all the bottles of alcohol in his arms “Take these please and maybe get us a little something to eat from the kitchen… and tea” you tried to gather your thoughts.

“Okay” he nodded “If you need anything else, let me know”

“Thanks” you sighed, feeling the tiredness slowly descent upon your whole body.

But there was no time for that. Not yet.

“I’ll stay with him tonight” for once, Ives did not tease you about it, and you were grateful.

“His plane is at 3 pm tomorrow. Do you think that’s manageable?” he looked sceptical.

“It has to be” you smiled as Ives squeezed your shoulder reassuringly “I better go back to him. Just leave the food outside and knock on the door, please. Think it’s best if he doesn’t see anyone else tonight”

“Of course”

Without further word, you entered the room again and locked the door behind you. Neil was sat on the bed, anxiously picking at the skin around his fingernails. His hair was falling in his eyes, and he was staring at his lap, looking incredibly lost. It hurt you to see him like this. Ignoring the growing ache in your chest, you approached him slowly.

“I asked Ives to get us some food and tea because I think we both could do with that” you attempted a smile when he looked up “But before it arrives, you could shower and get changed… that could help a little”

You stood near enough to reach out and brush your fingers over his cheek tenderly. He seemed to consider your words for a moment before he leaned into your palm.

“Okay, I’ll try” you saw him hesitate before adding, “Thank you for putting up with this”

“Of course, that’s what friends are for” for some reason, the word felt wrong. And he noticed that too as you saw a small frown appear before he smiled at you and left for the bathroom.

When you heard him put the shower on, you started cleaning the room. You put away the pages that landed on the floor and made the bed. While you were smoothing the covers, your brain came up with a rather intrusive thought about how there you were, alone with Neil in his room. Again. And how that really did not fit in with the friendship story you desperately clung to. Because it was rather obvious that you would end up sharing the bed again. That was not something friends did this frequently. You did your best to shut that voice, but you could not deny the facts. So you just sighed and waited patiently for Neil to remerge.

Food arrived before he showed up, so you just set the coffee table. Once you were done, you heard the bathroom door creak. You turned to look at him and were taken aback by the casualness of his get-up. For the first time since you have met, he was not wearing suit trousers and a shirt, and instead had loose joggers and a t-shirt on. Despite the reality of the situation you found yourself in, you could not help but stare. He caught your look with a rather sheepish expression that you did not expect.

Interesting… But there was no time to dwell on it, so you just invited him to the table and encouraged him to have something from the selection Ives got you. Sometimes you would anxiously glance at him to see whether his mood has not changed for worse again. But he seemed fine; quiet and sombre but there with you, physically and mentally. And that was what mattered for the moment. So after you ate, you suggested settling in bed to rest. Neil agreed to that without any objections, giving you hope that maybe he was past his worst point.

After the initial awkwardness of the situation wore off, and you both relaxed onto the pillows, you asked:

“Should we put the tv on? Just have some music on or something…” you searched his eyes, trying not to get too conscious of the moment.

While this was certainly not the first time for you to casually share a bed, this time it somehow felt different. But you blamed that on the rollercoaster of emotions you both went through in the recent days.

“Yeah sure” Neil nodded and sent you a small smile.

This silent version of him was strange to get used to. It felt like he was holding back from you, and you were not sure whether you liked that. But there was nothing you could do apart from giving him unlimited space and time for expression should he need it. So, to provide a distraction, you put on the tv and quickly found a suitable music channel that was not blasting annoying pop songs. Silence fell on you again, as you let the music help you relax. You were not even paying attention to the exact songs played.

‘Make me feel like I am breathing Feel like I am human’

That is until you felt Neil shift, and you glanced in his direction only to meet his intense stare. The blue eyes were fixed on you with a hazy tint on the pupils. Before you could ask him anything, he moved closer. You were struck by the look of intoxication on his face. Somehow you knew that it was not due to alcohol. You felt slightly paralysed by the multitude of feelings that came then. Neil ended his scrutiny of your face to ask:

“Can I kiss you?” his voice was huskier than usual.

‘Touch me, yeah I want you to touch me there’

“Neil...” his name usually came quite handy in those speechless moments.

There were millions of reasons why you should not let him, but the look on his face and what he said next started breaking down the resolve.

“I know” he was looking at you with something close to pleading “I know this won’t fix anything, but if for at least a few seconds I can forget about this mess... then please give me that”

‘She sought death on a queen-sized bed And he had said, "Darling, your looks can kill, So now you're dead.’

He was close now. So close that all you had to do was lean in and kiss him softly. He sighed at the contact, and you brushed away the damp hair from his eyes. Then he deepened the kiss, pulling you closer with his hands on your waist. You were too lost in the moment to stop him when he urged you to lie down on the covers. Feeling your heart pound in your chest, you continued the kiss as he hovered over your body. His hands wandered until you felt him slide them underneath the fabric of your shirt. The warm, sudden touch on your bare skin acted as a warning. You gasped and broke the kiss, but not before he managed to bite on your lower lip, drawing blood. The desperate whine he let out made you open your eyes in a flash. The darkness of his eyes made you realise how close it got to the point of no return. That was enough to help you shake off the daze.

“Please, not like this” you pushed him away gently.

Your cheeks were burning as you came to realise what nearly happened. But once you met Neil’s gaze again, you could tell that he was still not quite aware of the reality. The passionate look in his eyes was replaced with something akin to begging.

“I just want to get lost in you” he murmured, still keeping his hands on the bare skin of your waist.

He ran his fingers along your sides, and you shivered. Inhaling slowly, you tried to calm down. Normally his words would have made you throw caution to the wind. But something like that could be disastrous right now.

“I don’t want it to happen like that” you pushed him off you completely and sat up, suddenly unable to look him in the eye.

“But you want it?” the hopeful tone made your insides flutter with thousands of anxious butterflies.

Fuck… Of course, he wouldn’t let it go easily.

“Ask me again when we’re both better” you hoped that you sounded surer than you felt.

You touched the split lip and wiped away the blood droplet with your thumb. That moment must have awakened something in Neil, as suddenly you heard him inhale sharply before he blurted:

“God, I’m so sorry” you looked up to see him staring at you in terror “I don’t know what overcame me… It’s not that I didn’t want to…” he was clearly struggling with whatever he wanted to say.

“It’s okay. I won’t hold you accountable for whatever happened… or almost happened” you gave him your most convincing smile despite feeling more confused than ever.

“But I… I want you to know I didn’t do that only because I’ve lost control” that was enough for you.

“Neil, it’s fine” you interrupted him “You don’t have to explain. It doesn’t matter” you forced another smile onto your face, praying he will drop the topic.

You could not even explain why it hurt so much. Maybe because you worried it was just him losing control? And that if there was someone else with him in your place, it would have happened anyway? But it felt selfish to have those thoughts after everything that happened, so you just tried to rake your brain for some other distraction. Somehow, this moment felt right to breach a topic that has been on your mind for the past few hours. Slowly, you turned to face Neil, who was evidently still pondering the situation while staring at the tv screen unseeingly. 

“Neil…” he turned to you the instant you said his name “Before I came here, Ives told me about Alex…”

The moment you mentioned the name, you could see a plethora of emotions flash in Neil’s eyes. There was shock, sadness, and worry, among others. He visibly tensed and tried to school his features before responding.

“I- I would’ve told you” he was desperately searching for the right words “There just wasn’t a good moment, and I didn’t know if you…”

“No, no. Stop right there” you interrupted him, worried by the rambling “I didn’t mention that because I want an explanation or because it hurt me in any way” you met his gaze steadily “I only wanted you to know that I’ve been told. And that if you ever wanted to talk about it, I’m here” you tried your best to convey the support and love (?) into the long look you gave him.

“But… is-is this okay? Are you okay with that?” the doubt and genuine worry in his eyes made your heart clench painfully.

You wanted to hurt whoever made him question things like that.

“Of course it’s okay. You loved and lost him, and that’s the only thing I care about” tentatively, you reached out to take his hand again “It’s a vital part of your story, and I want to know you better” you smiled, seeing him relax slightly.

“Thank you… I’ll tell you one day, I promise” he brushed his thumb along your knuckles “But I think he’d like you”

You were not expecting that.

“Yeah?” you blushed slightly, suddenly flustered.

“He used to call me out on my bullshit too… and never fell for my charm too easily” he smiled fondly.

You liked the way pleasant memories seemed to light up his whole face.

“I can see some similarities then” you grinned shyly “To be fair, you need someone to keep you from getting too cocky” experimentally, you reached out to ruffle his hair.

If his blissful smile and the way he leaned into your touch were anything to go by, he did enjoy the gesture.

“I’m not sure I deserve you” he opened his eyes and looked at you with some kind of new emotion.

But before you could find any ways of answering that, he yawned. Once, then twice. The tiredness was finally catching up with him.

“Think you should try to get some sleep” upon his silent question, you added, “I’ll stay in case you need me”

For a second you wanted to offer that you will take the sofa, but somehow you knew that was not what he would have wanted. And neither did you if you were to be honest with yourself. So you just watched as he hesitantly started shifting on the bed, trying to find the most comfortable position. You switched off the forgotten tv and the lights and slowly laid down on the pillow. In the quiet, you could hear his shallow breaths. One look in his direction was enough to help you decide. You moved closer, closing the safety gap, and carefully placed your arm on his waist. After a beat, you curled up around him, with your head resting on his shoulder.

“Is this okay?” you asked, following the tense silence.

“Yeah… It’s just that I really don’t think I deserve any of this” you could hear the apprehension creeping back into his voice.

“You deserve much more” you pressed a small kiss to his neck “But let’s start with this. Good night, Neil”

“Good night…” he hesitated but then just exhaled, letting you hug him closer to your body.

*** The peace lasted only for the first two hours. After that, you were awoken by Neil tossing nervously. Before you could properly come to your senses, he let out a few soft whimpers. Shit. You shifted so that you were hovering over him and took a long look. His brow was furrowed, jaw clenched, and he was incredibly tense. Whatever nightmare he was having, it was escalating quickly. The next thing you knew, tears were falling down his cheeks, and he was mumbling something, sounding distressed. That was enough. You cupped his cheek, as softly as you could, and leaned in close:

“It’s just a dream” you kissed him on the forehead “Wake up love” you were not sure where the endearment came from.

You leaned back to see his eyes open in a blink. His gaze was unfocused, evidently still lost in the nightmarish world. Using the hand that was cupping his face, you brushed the stray hair away from his eyes. His breaths were fast yet shallow. Knowing the experience well, you immediately kicked into action.

“Neil, listen to me” you waited until his eyes locked with yours “It was just a dream. It’s all okay now” you placed your hand on his chest over the heart “You need to calm down”

“I can’t breathe” he choked out and sat up suddenly, nearly knocking you in the head.

“You’re panicking” you shifted so you could be sat in front of him.

The fact that you nearly climbed into his lap in the process had to be ignored for the time being. You took his hand in yours and placed it in the middle of your chest so he could feel the rising and falling with every breath you took. With your other hand, you tilted his chin so that he was forced to meet your gaze. His pupils were darkened by panic and adrenaline.

“Follow my breath” you made him match your breathing for a few cycles.

Once you heard his inhales and exhales elongate and level off, you let go of the hand you kept pressed to your chest. He kept it there for a moment longer, as though making sure you were really in front of him.

“I’m sorry” the heartbroken and tired look he gave you was enough to make your heart ache “You really shouldn’t have to deal with this mess”

“It was my conscious choice, and I would never leave you alone after something like this” you leaned in closer and pressed a small kiss to the corner of his mouth “Now, let’s try going back to sleep, shall we?”

This time he was holding on to you as though you were the only constant thing. With his arms around you and the warmth of his body, you could almost forget about the mess you both had to face in the morning. Before drifting off to sleep, you pondered his words again. More and more, you were sure that he got it the wrong way around. It was you who did not deserve someone like him. And you were afraid he would soon realise as much once the initial crush (or whatever it was) passed. But for now, you allowed yourself peace as you relaxed into his embrace and buried your face in his chest. If by some accident, the universe decided to be on your side, you would not complain.

*** In the morning, you were both awakened by Ives calling to make sure both of you were alive and awake. You had to blame the awkwardness that followed it on that very phone call. You only managed to shake it off when you sat down to the breakfast you brought from the canteen. You passed Neil coffee in silence, cursing your inability to hold a conversation after everything. But this time, he had some solutions. As your fingers brushed, he set down the coffee cup on the table and turned to you:

“I’m sorry about everything that I did and said yesterday” he glanced at your split lip “I wasn’t in control... and I don’t want you to be scared. I’d never do anything like that normally” he shifted nervously.

You knew an apology was coming, especially after seeing the way he looked at you ever since waking up. And while, admittedly, his behaviour worried you, you did not dare to think about how your ‘almost’ made you feel.

“I know, and I won’t judge you on how you acted last night” you put on your best smile, hoping to end the topic as quickly as possible.

But it was not meant to be as he clearly thought hard on what to say next. All you could do was wait and listen.

“I know that I crossed some lines” finally, he found the right words “And while I can’t deny that I was acting on my genuine desires…” he searched your eyes to make sure you understood “I won’t do that again because I respect your wishes to keep this strictly friendly”

Was this your imagination, or did he sound like he did not want to say that? If you were honest with yourself, that was not something you wanted to hear either. But now was most definitely not the time, so you just reached out to squeeze his knee reassuringly.

“Thank you, and don’t worry about it. We’re all good” he covered your hand with his and mirrored your smile.

Maybe all this confusion was worth it? After a short beat, you took your hand away and went back to breakfast. The silence was still there, but at least it was less awkward now. When you noticed him frown at the headache that was undoubtedly bothering him, you passed a painkiller. He smiled gratefully.

“So… when is my plane?” he asked after you both cleared the plates.

You could tell that he was dreading the trip. And it hurt to know that there was no way for you to help him.

“3 o’clock” you glanced at the watch “Which gives us about five hours to get you ready” you took in his sombre expression.

“I really don’t want to go” he met your gaze with emotionless eyes “It’s so fucking cruel to have me assist whoever the fuck that guy is when my best friend just killed himself. And I don’t even know why” the anger and hurt in his voice were somehow worse today.

Maybe it was because you could not blame it on his intoxication anymore.

“I know… And wish I had any answers, but I don’t know more than you do” you could only give him an apologetic half-smile “But I know that you have to be there to help… him”

Calling the younger version TP seemed somehow wrong. And you could only imagine how it must feel for Neil, on the eve of meeting that different version of his partner. 

“He won’t even know who I am” there was a broken edge to his voice “How am I supposed to meet him and act as though he’s a stranger?”

“Alright, walk me through what you’ve been told, and I’ll try to help as best as I can”

“Sure you wouldn’t rather go back to sleep?” he eyed you sceptically “You must be tired, and it’s all my fault”

“Neil, stop” you have had enough of the self-depreciation “I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I’m here for you” you took his hand in yours “And I wouldn’t rest anyway without knowing you’re well. So let’s go through the plan and then I’ll help you pack”

He only gaped at you with a dazed expression on his face. You wondered how someone so incredible could ever doubt their importance so much.

*** Surprisingly you managed to get Neil ready in time for the taxi departure. Together you planned the mission, made sure he had all the necessary information and contacts and was as mentally well as he could be after everything. When the time was near, Ives knocked on his door. This time, Neil let him in. You watched as the two men embraced tightly, sharing the trauma and sadness. Ives then took a step back and eyed Neil coolly.

“You did a good job” he flashed you a smile “He looks much better than I expected”

“Would you mind?” Neil looked at you nervously, and you laughed at the brief moment of lightness.

“Must say it wasn’t easy, but I did my best” to prove a point, you wandered over to Neil and smoothed his suit jacket.

After disagreeing over the wardrobe choices you managed to convince him to take a few linen suits and shirts for the warm weather in India. Now you were proud you succeeded. To be fair he looked good in anything, but there was something more intimate in the fact that you chose his outfits. But once again, you were brought to the present moment by Ives clearing his throat:

“The taxi is leaving in half-hour. I’ll leave you two now” he gave you a knowing smile and exited the room before you could roll your eyes at him.

Realising you still had your hand on Neil’s shoulder, you took a step back. He was watching you attentively with a small smile on his face. That probably explained Ives’ allusions…

“I won’t ask if you’re ready but… are you okay?” you met his gaze.

“As much as I can be, I suppose” he shrugged dejectedly “I really wish I could stay with you instead”

You saw his hand twitch at his side and decided to choose for him by taking it into yours, naturally entwining your fingers.

“Unfortunately, this time we can’t decide for ourselves. But remember that you can call me if you need help or just to talk. Don’t worry about the time zones, I’ll always pick up” you tried your best to show how you felt through the expression in your eyes.

But that was a dangerous game as soon enough you got lost in the blue of his eyes. As always.

“Thank you” he breathed out, looking at you with such tenderness that almost made you feel faint “Still don’t think I deserve you though” he grinned shyly.

“Oh you do, and I’ll keep on saying that till you believe it” you raised your joined hands to your lips and kissed his knuckles “While I enjoy this slightly subdued version of you…”

“What?” his affronted face made you laugh.

“You know very well what I meant” you smirked and let go of his hand, only to pull him in for an embrace.

It took him only a second to hug you back, with his arms wound tightly around your waist.

“You said we should hug more often so” you whispered into his ear and enjoyed the laugh it prompted “Hope this is good enough for you” you ran a hand down his back.

Then, upon a sudden thought, you pushed your hands underneath his suit jacket and splayed them on his back, relishing the feel of his skin through the shirt fabric. The only indication that he felt the difference was a sharp gasp he let out as he drew you even closer.

“More than that” he kissed the top of your head.

After at least two minutes more, you took a step back but still kept your hands on his waist.

“Please be safe out there. Don’t do anything stupid. And…” you shut his mouth with a hand upon seeing him protest “And don’t get too drunk before the meeting. I know that it will be hard, but that could only make you more likely to fuck up”

Before you could take your palm away, he placed a peck on your wrist, near the pulse point. The voice in the back of your head kept screaming about how this definitely was not something friends do. But you told it to kindly fuck off. At least for now.

“I can’t promise anything, but I’ll try” he flashed you a signature smile as though you could ever forget it “After all, I’m not the one to behave” proving the point, he brushed the pad of his thumb along your lower lip.

You inhaled sharply at the sensation. Looking questioningly into his eyes, you wondered whether he remembered about the earlier promise. But there was no time to find that out as sharp knocks interrupted you. It was time.