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fuckthisshitimin · 6 months ago

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[ID: A poem.

How to stop feeling alone.

1. Call your mom. Tell her you’re sorry, lie if you have to; you have to listen to her breathe and ask what she’s eating tonight. Tell her you grew up too fast and she looks so small now, tell her she should be sorry (you probably don’t have to lie) and if she still won’t say your name out loud or if she never remembers what you remember or sounds like an automated pre-recorded voicemail occupied line out-of-space tune, I am sorry.

2. Meet your grandfather at a park. It’s spring. If you don’t have a grandfather and can’t use a Ouija board safely, meet your ex-boyfriend’s grandfather, or, your coworker’s grandfather, any grandfather that lives near the sea and has a painting of a sailing ship in his living room will do. Ask him to teach you about knots and learn every way his skin is thinner than yours; the veins blue all over like the ocean’s claimed him already, how soft and fragile the back of his hands, maps and rivers. Ask him about his dog, who died before you were born. Write a good speech for his funeral. Again, I’m sorry.

3. Cry on the bench you met with the grandfather that might or might not have been yours to cry. You don’t have pictures of him so you have to draw him. If you can’t draw, write him; write a thousand poems about grief and loneliness and old age and post them online because sad poetry’s definitely engaging, right? Hearts that bleed seawater in pixels like idiots and no one answering the call — listen to me. The only good place to cry in public is a women’s bathroom in a nightclub around 2AM.

4. Call your mom again. Leave a message pacing in your room, tell her everything, absolutely everything, that the poems didn’t work and that you hate that you were foolish enough to hope they would, that you miss her — that you miss everything she could have been for you. Just for you.

5. Ask your friends for help. Help is something you deeply need yet you don’t have the vocabulary to make your request intelligible, like a baby crying — something is terribly wrong and mama’s starting to feel the edges of a headache piercing her skull inch by inch. Maybe if you’d stuck with the poetry — Now why are you alone in the first place? Surely it wasn’t always like that. Surely there was a time you were so smothered with love you didn’t even know what loveless air tastes like on the back of your throat, so what happened? What did you do? The hands on your shoulders, did you run away from them? did you push them away? did you say something like “you wouldn’t get it” when you were thirteen and your sister was ten? Oh, angel. Did you ever apologize?

6. Okay. Bring an offering. Come up to your friend’s apartment with a cake, poorly decorated, in the elevator mirror make sure to arrange yourself so that your hair falls right, soft bangs hiding the desperation in your brows but not your eyes kiss their cheeks at the door: “hey how are you?” “I brought a cake!” you conveniently don’t have to answer the question and I am sorry to say you Fucked Up Big Time. Watch how they eat and feast on their smiles and praises, etch their indulgent chuckle at your terrible icing skills in your brain, it feels good, so good, and now every time you come up empty-handed you will miss that and why are they even letting you in when you didn’t bring anything to the table? You sip the tea their offer with guilt and everything tastes like ashes. You can’t burden them with that, of course, so you grow silent and coil around yourself and if they ask how you are you can’t even say you brought a cake.

I have a feeling this is not working. Are you sure you’re trying? Maybe you just weren’t meant to be loved. You sure don’t make it easy. Maybe you’re alone because you have to be.

7. Laugh. Now.

8. Write another poem. If you’re sad enough, maybe it will be good enough. Force your very soul into a mold of words and verses and relish in the agony that comes from being bent and squeezed and embraced at last by a sweater-shaped casket. This is you. People like it, and they are too late; now you want to be left alone and isn’t your pain what attracted them about you? Resent them, resent everything you make them stand for in your head, hate a single person like you hate every single person that came before them: your seventh-grade history teacher your first best friend Sigmund Freud your mom all of them in one fell sweep.

9. When you run out of hate, choose one single person to hate less than the rest of them make sure they know how special that makes them. Take every gram of love they can produce, and keep it be their teacher and make them unlearn love for everything that isn’t you or like you. When they are materially as alone as you feel and still smile at you hate them with all you have, because they have a reason; and you still don’t. You’ve been their dragon, who’s yours? Yourself? Me? I’ve been talking you through this because you asked me to, you could’ve just stopped reading, and what else do you have? Blame your mother because you hate Freud but you hate your mother more, also, Freud can’t watch you kill your father and ask “is this my fault?” Freud won’t cry when you look her in the eyes and say “yes.”

10. Buy a self-help book! They are more thorough than this, how to stop being the dragon in seven steps, how to kill a dragon, how to find a hibernating dragon and slaughter it in its sleep, how to convince your village that the man you slaughtered was a dragon, how to be a man. “Man” here is not a gender; it’s a status you achieve by hating enough people, hating the right people. The main two ingredients for “Man” are power and hatred. “power” is money “hatred” is fear with a sword. To be Man you must hate everything that is not Man — White is Man Strong is Man Rich is Man Hero is Man Spring is NOT Man Pills is NOT Man Help is NOT Man Scared is NOT Man To be Man the first thing to hate is yourself, but I think you’ve got that one covered.

11. Fuck the squires, Marry the princess, Kill the dragons. How did we get there? You’re way too old to believe in fairy tales and this metaphor is out of touch with everything around you. You’re not a hero, you’re not a dragon, you’re not a princess. You’re a baby and everyone knows it takes a village. Start over. Call your mom. Of course she’s not enough. Nobody is a village. Look.

12. Be weak and don’t die. Sorry for tossing you around like that. It’s that you remind me of me. Everybody in the world reminds me of me. I don’t have the cure for loneliness and there isn’t one because loneliness, like many pains, is just information. It’s a signal. There’s nothing you can achieve that will rid you of feeling alone. That’s other people’s job. I’m sorry but there’s no other way to do this, you gotta get okay with your own dependence on other people. You’ve never been alone a single day in your entire life. Read your poems to your friends. See them misunderstand. Try to explain, and understand this will never be enough; Realize they are not enough. Realize you are not enough. Realize no one should ask you to be.

13. Count aloud from one to ten. Nothing happens.

Signed, M. Mikhaïl, 01053023

End ID]

Okay it should say 2024. We're in 2024. I know that. Of course I know that.

#poetry #mikhail writes #poem #long post

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x-stephanie-sinnz-x · 2 years ago

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Road trip (Part II)

After a while, he pulled off the highway again and into some industrial area. He said he had another delivery. It took a while. He came back with a bag of chips and a bottle of soda for me. I was quite thankful since I had not eaten or drank anything except cum all day. “Get back on my dick.” He said, as we were pulling back onto the interstate. I started sucking again. It seemed like a very long time later that we pulled off the interstate again and pulled into another truck stop. I was still sucking his dick, I wanting to milk one more load out. I was only vaguely aware that he was on his phone. Finally, his cock began to pulse in my mouth, as I swallowed his 7th load. “Hey. I’ve got a friend here. I want you to suck his dick as well. Come on.” So went to put my g-string back on and open the door. “No! I said leave them off”

Oh. OK. It was mostly dark already, but there were lots of parking lot lights. We walked over to a blue truck. The window rolled down. “Is this the incredible cocksucker?”

“Ask him if you can suck his dick.”

“Do you need your dick sucked?” I asked.

“Get in the other side.”

I got in. He was overweight and black. He already had his hard dick out. It was about 5 inches, but pretty fat. I got on my knees and started sucking as best as I could. I spent a good 20 minutes working his cock as good as I could as he slammed his fingers into my drenched cunt, until finally he began to cum in my mouth. I swallowed and got back out of his truck. “I’ve got another friend over here.” We walked over to a white truck. “Go ask him.”

I went over to the drivers window. He rolled it down. “Do you need your dick sucked?”

He looked a little puzzled. “Um … Yes!”

I went over to the passenger door and climbed in. I wasted no time. I went right over and pulled his sweatpants down. His dick was pretty small, but it was soft. Maybe it will get larger.

I got on my knees again and started to suck on his small dick. It did get bigger, but only topped out at maybe 4 inches and not very thick. I kept sucking. He was a pretty quick cummer, because he only lasted about 3 minutes. He made up for it by being a big cummer. He shot more than 10 ropes into my mouth. He filled me up. It was very enjoyable. I got back out of the truck. Cluster_funk was waiting for me. “Hey. It was supposed to be that one.” He pointed over towards another white truck. Wait! What happened? Did I just suck off some random guy?!? Lol oops .

I went over to the other truck. The window was already down.

“Sorry I’m late. Do you need your dick sucked?”

He just nodded, so I got in. His cock was about 7 inches, but thinner and with a big head. Very nice, actually. He lasted about 10 minutes. I finished and got back out.

“Let’s go inside.” He said and started walking to the station. I followed, but very nervous since my bare ass and pussy was still peeking out, not to mention my tits where on full display through my shirt. The clerk was not at the counter, so we passed and headed towards the bathrooms. A woman passed me in an aisle. I could see her eyes. She definitely saw my bare pussy mound and made a disgusted face. But she didn’t say anything. I kept walking.

He pulled me into the mens bathroom. There was a man washing his hands. The Cluster_funk pointed to him.

“Do you need your dick sucked?” I said softly.

“What? Get away from me, fucking whore.” And then he walked out of the bathroom.

Another guy walked in a moment later. Cluster _funk pointed at him.

“Do you need your dick sucked?”

He stopped in his tracks and looked at me up and down. He looked down and saw my pussy showing. “What the fuck?”

Oh god! I can't keep doing this to random people. I am going to get arrested or something.

He reached down and grabbed my pussy mound, shoved a couple of fingers in me and held it tight. Then he started to pull me with him towards a stall. We went inside and he closed the door. He took his pants off and sat down on the toilet.

“Get to work.”

I got on my knees. On that gross bathroom floor. I started to suck. As I was sucking, I began to hear the unmistakable sound of shit plopping into the toilet bowl. This was by far the most disgusting thing I had ever done. I kept sucking, though. His dick wasn’t staying super hard, though. After a bit, he grabbed my head and pressed me down as far as he could. Then I felt some liquid in my mouth.

What was this? I knew he wasn’t cumming. Oh crap! He was peeing in my mouth. Gross! Most ran out of my mouth, but obviously I swallowed some. It made my stomach hurt thinking about it. He released me and I got right out.

Cluster _funk was waiting for me. We walked back out of the station and back to where the trucks were all parked.

“Do you want to go home?”

“sure”

“Well, you have to do one more thing. I’m going to sit back in the truck. You see this line of trucks here? I am going to watch you go to each truck and offer your services. We can leave once you are done.”

Awe man! My jaw was actually a bit sore from sucking so much cock, and I have swallowed so many loads today.

He walked over and got into the truck. I walked over to the first truck in the line. Nobody was home. I walked to the second truck. He rolled down his window.

This time I decided I was way to tired to suck any more dick so I asked “Do you want some company?”

“No mam.” And then he rolled his window back up.

I walked over to the third truck and knocked on the window.

“Do you want some company?”

“Get in.”

I got in the passenger side and he took me to the back and got right to work. He had an average dick and took about 10 minutes to cum in me. I cleaned up and climbed back out.

Then my heart sank. Cluster_funk's truck was gone. I was stranded with no purse, no money, and no phone. I wasn’t even sure where I was. I went back inside the station. There was a map on a wall. I was about 30 miles from home. Now what?

I had an idea.p Why not just ask if someone would give me a ride?

“Hey, are you heading west?”

“Yes.”

“Could you give me a ride”

“No. I’m not allowed to do that.”

“I’ll suck your dick on the way...”

“All right. This way.”

We climbed into his truck. He started the engine and started driving. I was true to my word. I got back on my knees and unzipped his pants and pulled his dick out. He was another average-sized dick.

He was doing me a favor, so I tried very hard to please him. After 15 minutes of vigorous sucking, I felt him start to pulse and shoot his cum into my mouth. I cleaned him up. Then being drunk on cum, I kissed his cock. I put it away and zipped his pants for him. We arrived at a gas station, parked and climbed into the back of the cab and he fucked me doggy style.

He pulled out of me and came all over my back.

Later he dropped off his trailer, and drove me home.

It was a strange trip, but I definitely enjoyed it.

Stephanie Sinnz 💋

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ediblegardenspointloma · 1 year ago

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Six Reasons to Plant Sunflowers

I just planted sunflowers seeds in a six-pack for later transplant to the garden. Last year I grew them next to my zucchini plants with good success.

My thought was to attract bees to the sunflowers and the nearby zucchini flowers for pollination. They were gorgeous together. (Sunflower ‘Junior’ from Renee’s Garden, linked below).

The following text for Six Reasons To Plant Sunflowers is from the Home Garden Seed Association. The photos are from my garden.

Sunflowers are colorful. They are joyful! And due to the many commercial uses of sunflowers—cooking oil, cut flowers, and birdseed are three— they have been the focus of much breeding work. No matter where or how you garden, there is a sunflower for you.

1. To Attract Birds If it’s birds you’re after, plant multi-flowering, branching sunflowers. Birds devour any and all varieties of sunflower seeds. Particularly valuable for most winter birds are oil-rich black oil sunflowers. The seeds are thinner shelled, and easy for seed-eating birds to crack open.

(edible gardens52) A few years ago I grew very tall sunflowers in the vegetable garden. Warm fall days came and the seeds ripened to perfection for the birds. I was off to work one day and came home in the late afternoon to this. I missed the feast but wonder who was in attendance.

2. For the Table We associate sunflowers with vitality and happiness— a bouquet of sunflowers brings these good feelings indoors. Cut the stems at a 45° angle and strip all but the top leaves. Pollenless sunflowers will not drop pollen all over your tablecloth, and they’ll last up to two weeks in a vase. Bees will visit these male-sterile flowers, as they still produce nectar. If you choose to grow single stem varieties, you can space them tightly to produce smaller blooms, or a foot apart for larger flowers.

3. For Pollinators All sunflowers attract a great variety of pollinators, mostly bees. For a long season of pollinator abundance, choose branching rebloomers. The best choices for pollinators are those with fully exposed disc florets—the hundreds (or even thousands!) of tiny center blooms that develop into seeds.

4. For Architecture and Garden Interest There’s no doubt about it, by late summer, sunflowers are showstoppers. For fantastic garden focal points, choose tall—but not so tall that they’ll crash without staking— sunflowers in a variety of shapes and shades. There are many to choose from: big, fluffy ‘Honey Bear’, award-winning ‘Valentine’, deep, rich ‘Chocolate Cherry’. For garden adventure, look for a seed packet that contains several varieties of sunflowers. Shorter, more reachable varieties, such as fully double ‘Teddy Bear’, are ideal for children’s gardens.

5. For Containers If your garden space is limited, look for sunflowers bred for containers. ‘Sunray Yellow Hybrid’ (pictured) branches out to produce up to 14 smallish blooms, and tops out at less than 2 feet. ‘Music Box’ has bicolor blooms with chocolate centers, and grows to about 21⁄2 feet. (Seeds pictured below are from Renee’s Garden.

6. For Good Eating To roast sunflower seeds, spread them evenly on a shallow pan and bake them at 300° until they are golden brown, stirring occasionally. Varieties with large, heavy flowerheads, such as ‘Sunzilla’, ‘Mammoth Grey Stripe’, or ‘Titan’, are the best choices for edible seeds. Another edible option: Sunflower microgreens are delicious and easy to grow. To speed the growing process, soak sunflower seeds in a jar of water until roots start to appear, changing the water every 8 to 12 hours. Sprinkle them close together on a soilless medium and top lightly with the medium. Harvest the greens at about 4 inches tall.

#sunflowers #pollinators #Renee's Garden Seeds #Home Garden Seed Association

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mooseboogaloo · 21 days ago

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I'd like to add that ALL non stick pans are built to be thrown out and replaced every 6-24 months (yes this includes higher end ceramic pans).

Non stick is not inherently bad but have to be treated with care to preserve the coating if you want them to last longer, but once you notice it sticking its advised to toss. Do not use them on high heat, They're best used with liquid in them and try not to use them above the med setting (usually 3-4 if ur stove thar goes from 1-6). Do not leave them on heat with nothing in them as it damages the coating faster. Only use silicone or wood tools, NEVER steel. Avoid the dishwasher, soft sponges and hand wash.

What you do NOT want to do is buy sets because you will end up overpaying for stuff you won't use often and it will take up a lot of extra space

Cookware is a daily use item and investing in the right tools can help make cooking less of a chore.

The staples you want to have:

- a small non stick pan for things like eggs (I recommend all clad, good brand and their non stick is cheaper than their SS)

- a 10-11 inch 3ply stainless steel sauté pan (all clad d3 [$$$], viking[$$], Cuisinart [$-$$]) **if you're just starting to cook, thinner/regular SS is cheaper and still works well, 3-5ply is just thicker and will last longer/transfer heat better, 5ply is rather expensive and is a professional level (a sauté pan is a frying pan with taller walls and lid)

- a smaller 3ply SS frying pan (~9inches) OR cast iron skillet OR carbon steel wok (this depends on what you want to cook more often, I cook a lot of Asian food so I have a wok [the frying pan still gets used but depends on the dish since I mostly use the sauté pan, and i have abandoned cast iron as I don't cook a lot of meat and have weak wrists 🥲 they're heavy so it's something to take into account])

- a large pot of your choice (I use a cheap 7qt $10 non stick one I got off amazon [imusa] and u can upgrade to a SS stock pot when u have the money or if you want to make a lot of soups or are cooking large quantities)

- a SS 4qt sauce pan (which is a small pot, not a pan)

OPTIONAL (for if you want to cook a wider variety of food)

- a second, smaller (2qt) SS sauce pan

- a carbon steel wok (I've seen yosukata recommended but I just got one from my Asian grocery store for cheap [you do need a wok ring if you don't get a flat bottom one])

- a 9 inch SS frying pan

- a cast iron pan (Lodge[$(Chinese)], staub[$$-$$$(American)], le Creuset[$$$+(French)]).

- an enamel coated cast iron deep skilett, same brands as above

- a cast iron Dutch Oven, same brands as above.

The first 5 will let u cook just about anything, and u don't even need the frying pan/wok/cast iron if ur just stating out and cooking simple stuff and don't plan on multitasking. Build out ur kitchen to ur needs, as you need it! Don't feel like you have to buy everything at once! Also, get larger pots/pans than the sizes I listed if you're cooking for a family or cook large quantities and feel like u need it. The sizes I listed are relatively standard but I also don't eat a lot and am only cooking for myself.

For reference, (all prices in USD) when I first moved out and was learning to cook all I had was a 7inch+10inch tfal frying pan set (~$15 on sale) and a 3qt(?) Ikea pot (5 dollars?). Then I bought a 7qt pot a couple months later, cause I wanted to make pasta/noodles (that weren't just instant noodles), for $10 on sale on Amazon. Then the generic nameless wok from the Asian grocery store for ~20 (wok ring was ~10). My viking sauté pan was my first big kitchen purchase at $40 earlier this year. I still use the tfals, tho I plan on replacing the 10inch with a 9.5inch SS (fingers crossed it goes on sale over Christmas) and the 7inch with an all clad whenever the coating goes.

Kitchen appliances I would recommend purchasing when moving out on your own:

Air fryer

One of those panini press grill things (not only can you make sandwiches but you can grill chicken and steak if you have an expensive model)

Rice cooker (not only good for rice but quinoa and any other grain, alternatively you could buy an Instapot)

Electric kettle (depends on how much tea you drink but it’s good for boiling water for cleaning and preheating water for pasta etc)

Kitchen appliances I would not recommend buying when you move out on your own:

Counter top coffee maker (you should not be drinking an entire pot of coffee on your own and it will be stale by the time you get to the bottom, plus these bitches suck to clean, Keurigs, French presses and stove top percolators where you make one or two cups at a time are more practical for a single person)

#Disagree on panini press #Get a toaster oven over an air fryer #They're similar if not the same in most cases #But the toaster oven is a lil more versatile and easier to clean #I hate air fryer baskets in most models #Agree on p much everything else #If ur in the US the tj/Marshals/Ross has a lot of discounted cuisine art and Braun stuff #Usually it's the same quality as their regular stuff #They also sell all clad and viking for pots and pans #When I lived with my parents my mother had a lot of very nice stuff #I learned I need none of it lol #Cast iron is so good for steaks tho #Miss it #But also beef is so fucking expensive

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sunalimerchant · 3 months ago

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How to Choose the Perfect Platinum Chain for Men: Style and Durability Tips

A platinum chain is more than just a piece of jewelry; it’s a statement of style, elegance, and sophistication. Known for its rarity, strength, and timeless appeal, platinum is a popular choice for men who want to invest in a piece that will last a lifetime. However, choosing the perfect platinum chain requires careful consideration of both style and durability. In this article, we’ll guide you through the key factors to consider when selecting a platinum chain that suits your taste and withstands the test of time.

1. Understanding Platinum: Why It’s the Ideal Choice

Before diving into the specifics of choosing a platinum chain, it’s important to understand why platinum is such a desirable material. Platinum is a rare metal that is more durable than gold and silver. It has a natural white luster that doesn’t tarnish over time, making it ideal for those who want a piece of jewelry that requires minimal maintenance.

Unlike other metals, platinum is hypoallergenic, meaning it’s a great choice for individuals with sensitive skin. Its density and weight also give it a luxurious feel, which is often associated with high-end, premium jewelry. All these qualities make platinum an excellent investment, both in terms of style and longevity.

2. Selecting the Right Chain Style

Platinum chains come in various styles, each offering a different look and feel. Here are some popular styles to consider:

Curb Chain: This classic style features interlocking links that lay flat against the skin, making it a popular choice for men. The curb chain is versatile and works well with both casual and formal attire.

Figaro Chain: The Figaro chain has an alternating pattern of shorter and longer links, creating a distinctive, stylish look. It’s perfect for those who want a chain that stands out without being too flashy.

Rope Chain: Rope chains are made of twisted links that resemble a rope. This style is durable and has a substantial appearance, making it a great choice for men who prefer a bolder look.

Box Chain: The box chain is made up of square-shaped links, giving it a sleek and modern appearance. This style is ideal for men who appreciate minimalist and contemporary designs.

Wheat Chain: Wheat chains are made of four strands of twisted oval links, creating a visually intricate design. This style is elegant and adds a touch of sophistication to any outfit.

When choosing a style, consider your personal taste and how the chain will complement your wardrobe. If you’re looking for something versatile, a curb or box chain might be the best option. For those who want to make a bolder statement, a rope or Figaro chain could be the perfect choice.

3. Determining the Right Length and Thickness

The length and thickness of the chain are crucial factors that influence both the style and comfort of the piece.

Length: Platinum chains for men typically range from 18 to 24 inches in length. An 18-inch chain will sit at the base of the neck, making it ideal for men who want a subtle, close-fitting piece. A 20-inch chain falls just below the collarbone, offering a more relaxed look, while a 22 to 24-inch chain hangs further down the chest, making it perfect for layering or wearing over clothing.

Thickness: The thickness of the chain affects its durability and appearance. Thicker chains are more robust and can handle everyday wear, while thinner chains are more delicate and are best suited for occasional use or as a layering piece. A 2-4mm thickness is a good starting point for those who want a chain that’s durable yet refined.

4. Considering Durability and Care

Platinum is known for its durability, but like all fine jewelry, it requires proper care to maintain its luster and strength. When choosing a platinum chain, consider the following:

Link Construction: Check the quality of the links and clasps. Solid links are more durable than hollow ones, and a sturdy clasp will ensure that the chain stays secure during wear.

Daily Wear: If you plan to wear the chain daily, opt for a style and thickness that can withstand regular use without showing signs of wear. Thicker, sturdier chains like the curb or rope styles are ideal for everyday wear.

Maintenance: Platinum chains require minimal maintenance, but occasional cleaning with a mild soap solution and a soft cloth will help keep the metal looking its best. It’s also advisable to store the chain in a soft pouch or jewelry box to prevent scratches.

5. Matching the Chain with Pendants

If you’re considering adding a pendant to your platinum chain, make sure the style, length, and thickness of the chain complement the pendant. A heavier pendant may require a thicker, more robust chain, while a delicate pendant might pair well with a thinner chain. Ensure that the bail (the loop that attaches the pendant to the chain) fits comfortably over the chain’s links.

Conclusion

Choosing the perfect platinum chain for men involves balancing style, comfort, and durability. By considering the chain’s style, length, thickness, and overall construction, you can select a piece that not only complements your personal taste but also stands the test of time. Whether you’re looking for a versatile everyday chain or a statement piece for special occasions, a platinum chain is a timeless investment that will continue to add sophistication to your wardrobe for years to come.

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havnblog · 6 months ago

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Yes, the iPad Pros Needed to Be Thinner

I won’t be buying the new iPads, as I’ll keep rocking my 11-inch 2018 (with Magic Keyboard). But one thing has been bugging me about the early coverage of the new models, that I wanted to address. 1

Because, when I watched the Keynote and saw that the new iPad Pro models were thinner and lighter, I immediately went “Nice!”. But I kept seeing (and hearing) comments like this, here exemplified by David Pierce (whom I really like!) on The Verge: 2

Basically, the point is, “Who asked for this? Why not make it thicker and increase the battery life?” Nilay (Patel) agrees with this — but then, six(!) minutes later, answers the question: 3

So yeah, not a long time between them not understanding why they made it thinner and lighter, and complaining about it being too thick and heavy…

Reason #1: The Magic Keyboard

As you can see, the iPad becomes pretty thick! Furthermore, I personally really like that it’s cantilever instead of using a kickstand (as it uses way less depth) — but then you have to worry about it falling over. This has caused two things in the old Magic Keyboard (MK):

To counterbalance, the keyboard itself has to be heavier.

It still can’t tilt as much, and this contributes to the lack of a function row.

So, as the new iPads are thinner and lighter, they’ve spent some of the gains on making the keyboard lighter as well, and some on adjusting the angle to make room for a function row. Very valuable stuff, in my opinion!

Table Title

Product Weight Test 1 Test 2 12.9-inch M2 iPad Pro + MK 1 392 grams Something long enough Something not short 13-inch M4 iPad Pro + MK 1 246 grams Didn't like it empty! M3 13-inch MacBook Air 1 240 grams Test B

Comparisons, from this article.

Reason #2: Holding it

A friend and I have exchanged iPads temporarily — so currently he has my iPad Pro 11-inch, and I have his iPad Mini. 4 The latter is obviously way worse as a semi-laptop — but it’s very nice to hold! Either for reading, watching movies or playing games. But the larger and heavier the iPad is, the more clunky this (traditional tablet usage) is. I’m not saying my 11-inch is terrible at this — but I absolutely think improving it at it is worthwhile. And this is even more true on the 13-inch. Previously, I had a 12.9-inch (with a home button), and I rarely used it in my hands, as it was so clunky.

More batteries come at a cost

If Apple instead shoved more battery life into the iPads, we have to remember that we would have to carry that extra weight, and deal with the extra thickness, every time we use (or just transport) the product! And we would only benefit from the extra battery life those times we’re away from power for more than 10 hours. I’m not saying it wouldn’t be nice to not have to plug it in quite that often, or get away with a smaller power bank on a trip. But I am saying the two reasons above far outweigh (pun intended) this benefit.

So I’m pleased Apple chose to make it thinner and lighter — because it was absolutely needed. And I think I’ll love it, when I buy the 2024 11-inch model second hand in three years!

I wanted to write this post earlier, before the reviews are out - but I still think it’s relevant! ↩︎

Transcript:

David: “But them I’m like, OK if this was was a little thicker, so it didn’t have a camera bump (which is a thing a lot of people pointed out was…). This thing could’ve been the thickness of the camera bump, and would’ve been about the same thickness of the last iPad - which no one was complaining about the thickness of, by the way.”

Nilay: “Yeah.” ↩︎

Transcript:

Nilay: “What I’m really curious about is the keyboard. Because my favourite plane computer of all time, was the 12-inch MacBook, which was super light and thin. I tried to replace it with the previous 11-inch iPad Pro - which turned out to be, like, thick. Like, it was just like a heavy, weird thing… It, like, just wasn’t as good as a laptop in many ways, because of just the way it worked.”

David: “Yeah.”

Nilay: “Is the new keyboard case sort of better at… They announced it as being more like a MacBook than ever, which I thought was really interesting.” ↩︎

Why no love for this, Tim!? ↩︎

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bestwigoutlets · 1 year ago

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A Complete Guide on Clip in Hair Extensions in 2023

Everyone wants to have gorgeous hair. However, such hair won’t last long. Many of us will experience hair thinning at some point as part of aging. Fortunately, there are clip in hair extensions that can do the trick of concealing the thinning of your hair. To know more about them, make sure to continue reading.

What are Clip In Hair Extensions? To add more volume most extensions come with more than 1 piece of various hair wefts. They are attached manually on the top of every hair weft.

What are the Types of Clip In Hair Extensions? There are two major types available on the market:

PU-Weft. The clips are sewn on the weft directly. These extensions lay flat against your scalp because one piece is 50% thinner than lace-weft. This type can’t be dyed because it’s water-proof. Lace-Weft. It’s made with sewn-on hair weft. The hair is sewn like a curtain. You may choose this option if you want to dye them. How do the Extensions Stay On? The clips have silicone pads. They are soft and they can provide a better grip to avoid them from slipping. If you have fine hair, the silicon pads can protect your hair strand from being damaged by the metal clip.

What Clip In Hair Extensions to Use for Short Hair? To pick the right extensions, here are some things to consider:

Hair length. Your hair needs to be at least 3 to 4 inches long. The clips ins must be applied under the hairline. Color. If you can’t find the exact color of your natural hair, opt to buy a shade lighter than your natural hair then dye the extensions later on to get the exact shade. Weight. You may require more hair to mask the blunt ends which can be heavier. How to Buy Clip In Hair Extensions for Thin Hair? Don’t choose heavy hair extensions. They don’t do you any good. Instead, opt for a set that weighs around 120 grams. PU clip-in hair is more suitable for this situation. You won’t feel uncomfortable when you wear it as it adds volume and length to your natural hair. Choose an extension with an invisible wire. It works like a headband. It secures the hair without using glue. Can You Curl These Hair Extensions? There are different ways to curl them. One is the use of curling iron. You can also use hair straighter to give you bigger and thicker curls. However, you can also use flexi rods if you don’t want to use heat on the hair. Snail rollers and hair rollers can also be used.

What Hairstyles You Can Achieve with These Hair Extensions? A high bun is the most common option. It makes you look sexier and more attractive. Braided bun and half-knot are also wonderful options.

Where to Buy Affordable Yet High-Quality Hair Extensions? If you’re planning to purchase a set of clip in hair extensions in 2023, make sure to shop at Best Wig Outlet. We have a variety of options for you to choose from.

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theevangelion · 2 years ago

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Soulmates: Chapter XIX

(Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

Lena felt a little guilty as she stared down at the sandwich in her hand.

Not for the morning spent teasing Kara breathless and panting but for the lie she had told after.

Then again it was straight out of Kara’s old playbook. Not technically a lie but just a little bit of missing context.

Lena didn’t go to work; not right away at least. That was the main thing she felt conflicted about. She had known for some time she wasn’t going to work because Thursday mornings had become a period for constantly reliable out of office engagement.

A short interim of time spent elsewhere, nothing salacious, sometimes an hour, sometimes four, and she didn’t really talk about it to anyone.

At first, Lena didn’t mention it because she thought it might awaken something painful for Kara. That feeling passed. It solidified and became its own secret, just for the sake of having a secret to keep between old friends, silly, fun, and little more than that.

She had been meaning to talk to Kara about it.

She just didn’t know how anymore.

“It does look like bunny ears,” Cat agreed.

“You want half?” Lena offered the other one forward.

“With respect, I would rather try and perform fellatio on a horse running the Kentucky Derby.” Cat’s eyes came to the side again, smirking at the paltry excuse of a sandwich, then back to the television. “Salmonella written all over it.”

“I know, I said the same.” Lena sighed and leaned back in the plastic chair. “How are you feeling?”

“Good.”

“I’m being serious.”

“I know,” Cat sighed. “Me too.”

“You don’t want…” Lena wasn’t even sure what there was to offer. “I can’t get you anything?”

“A magic bullet to rewrite the faulty genetic code that is causing cells to uncontrollably divide and spread into the healthy tissue of my body?” Cat suggested. “Did you pack that with your sandwiches this morning?”

“Forgot it on the kitchen table, sorry.” Lena shrugged and earned a grin. “Cat?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

Cat sat there, unbothered by it, in her perfectly Catherine Grant kind of way. There she was in a hospital bed drowning in the size of the gown, some inches too big, still growing bigger by the day, yet still so immaculate and beautiful.

There was this power she held in her hands, even like this, it simply exuded from her; to sit there with an IV pole, dangling chest port, with this certain pronounced thinness from the treatment, and yet she was beautiful in a way that announced itself—demanded it from the eye of the beholder.

Fierce, dignified, highlighter and blush on her cheeks because she still held herself to that standard, and Lena could tell that her blonde hair had been cut and styled, blown out, some pride put into it despite…

Lena didn’t want to acknowledge that Cat’s hair was thinner than last Thursday, but it was. Cat didn’t care, for as long as she had it, she would make the best of it, the most of it, and that was yet another perfectly Catherine Grant thing to do given the circumstances.

“Cat?”

“If you tell me that you love me again—”

“I do.” Lena nodded, solemn, exasperated, staring at nothing. “You are…one of my best friends. You are the person who was there every day, when Sam died, when I was sick and in the hospital after, you killed every hit piece dead in the water—never said a single thing in the magazine despite knowing all the big scoops. I hate things feel weird between us, I hate that you don’t call or text anymore. I hate that we’re not talking about the elephant in the room because you are—were—my best friend.”

“And yet here you are, despite all of this supposed disconnect from my end, every week, more reliable and on time than a German train service.” Cat’s eyes twinkled with amusement, though she never looked away from the television. “Lena, I don’t call or text because I’m…” She gestured at herself, at the room, as though it was arrogant for Lena to assume some priority above it in her thought processes. “Listen, I don’t know what elephant you think there is but if you want to talk about it you should talk about it.”

“Kara.”

“Nope.” Cat shook her head.

“You’re soulmates.”

“We may very well have been,” Cat quietly agreed in a way that was non-committal to the idea, then shrugged and finally looked at her friend. “Here’s the thing, Lena. We can play what if games, we can go round in circles, talk about hypotheticals where I have some long years ahead of me, where Kara is…” She shook her head, as though wanting to say something based and cruel, yet struggling to find something.

That was very unlike Cat Grant.

“She does this thing, you know.” Lena stared off to the side, thinking about it, smiling despite how sad it made her feel. “We’ll be doing something, watching television, eating dinner, whatever. I’ll say something. She doesn’t reply. Then I look and she’s…” Lena gestured at nothing. “She’s away in some daydream, with this vacant look on her face, and I know she’s playing out a different life—some life she says that she doesn’t think about despite very much, constantly, always running away from anything that makes her think about it. She just sort of comes back to life, and there’s this look in her eyes, as though she’s looking at me but seeing…”

Lena didn’t know how to say it.

She didn’t want to say it because then she would be admitting it.

But she gestured.

And Cat understood.

“Lena.” Cat gestured her hands for the rambler to slow down on her rapid, nervous rabbiting. “It sounds as though you care a whole lot more than either of us do and for that I can only apologise.”

“I am objectively the person who should be apologising to you.”

“That won’t be necessary. I sincerely am sorry that I have…become an imagined competitor in your relationship with Kara Danvers. I want you to be happy. I want Kara to be happy. I want that for you both because me?” She stared very seriously. “I have had the happiest, biggest, greatest of lives. I regret nothing. I wish for nothing. If I am supposed to be sat here, filled with regret, then I’m not.”

“I’m not Kara, Cat.” Lena pushed forward slightly. “I know you well enough, for long enough, that I know when you’re talking out of your ass.”

“Then ask me whatever it is you really want to ask me, Lena.” Cat closed her eyes and sighed.

“Did you…” Lena stopped, because she didn’t want to ask, she just wanted the answer so that if ever Kara wanted to know, one day, then someone would have answers to give her. “Did you feel some pull, some awareness? People say that but I wouldn’t know. I just, I’m curious?”

Cat opened her eyes and looked at Lena with a faint, vague expression that couldn’t be deduced. It wasn’t displeasure but it wasn’t a happy memory.

“I felt drawn to her, yes.” Cat nodded. “I think…a week after she started with the temp agency? I realised I was having to force myself to call her Keira. I knew her name, and I don’t know names, not assistants at least.”

“That doesn’t sound very romantic.”

“Because it isn’t.”

“Do you love her?” Lena blurted.

That took Cat back more than a little. She blinked, then blinked again. Lena felt guilty because the answer wasn’t for Kara. It was selfish, it was necessary, it was something she herself wanted to understand, because how could Cat possibly not love that girl?

More than that, Lena didn’t feel jealousy, just this faint sense of unselfish purpose to somehow give everyone a little of whatever they needed. Mostly because she felt greedy, as though there had been an abundance in her life, a prolonged series of habitual good things, despite the fact it wasn’t true. Her wife had died. She had grieved it then, still grieved it now, but there was joy, and her love with Kara didn’t feel like a band aid. It felt like a breath of life. It felt like this good, insular thing where she might make a home for the rest of her life.

But, Lena knew what she had been seeing as time had gone on.

She knew because she used to do the same thing, staring off, losing herself, playing house with Sam long after she passed, wondering about a life that would never take root. The trouble was that Kara still had time to know things, hold it in her hands, have moments beyond the realm of her imagination, and Lena felt it was be selfish—repugnant—to deny her of that.

To deny either of them that small moment in time to just have whatever the universe wanted to give them.

“Your lack of answer is an answer,” Lena told her straight. “I’m not asking because I’m hoping for one or the other. I’m asking because…we’re too old, too jaded, and too fucking deep into this thing not to talk about it?” She rolled her eyes at her friend.

Cat sighed and looked at her manicure resting in her lap.

“She is a very pretty girl.” Cat smiled to herself. “She reminds me of myself when I was younger. It’s not the sweetness, it’s the fury, every now and then her eyes would…” Cat imitated Kara’s expression, eyes narrowing with tension, angry and righteously laser-focused. “I know you won’t believe me but there isn’t some pointed, obsessive attraction. I don’t think I’m supposed to have a soulmate, Lena, because the truth of the matter is that I like women, a little, sure, but I have always preferred men because they are stupid and well-behaved, and Kara Danvers is neither of those things.”

“Please talk to her?” Lena shut her eyes and pleaded.

“I don’t want to make this situation any worse than it—”

“Please,” Lena begged between tight, uncomfortable lips. “Cat, please let her know you a little better. I want to spend my life with her. I want to be the woman who is rock solid and there when she needs me the most. You—” Lena felt a dampness on her cheeks because it hurt, not just for Kara, but her heart too, Cat was her true friend.

“Well go on.” Cat snarked, smiling a little. “Don’t quit just before you start blowing smoke up my ass. You were saying?”

“I was saying, you royal bitch.” They both chuckled and staved off some differing sized rocks in their throats. “You are bowing out in a way only you ever could, you know? A little too early, but still in your own time, with everyone on baited breath hoping for an encore because you are Catherine fucking Grant.” There was such fierce respect in the way she said that name. “I do not know how I am supposed to compete with you, Cat, at some point after the dust settles when she starts to put you on the pedestal. I do not know how to explain and talk about my friend, to the girl I love, knowing that she is falling in love with some version of you in the back of her brain.”

“Kara Danvers will never put me on a pedestal. I think, personally, for her to have my name on her ass cheek?” Cat lifted a brow and thought about it. “Well, she is the person consecrated by the universe to not put me on the pedestal. Everyone else does, seems only right that she wouldn’t.”

“She is twenty-three, but she won’t be always.” Lena shrugged. “What the fuck am I going to do when she’s thirty, forty, then fifty, and she stops and looks around and realises she’s closer to you than she ever was when you were alive? I mean, fuck, dude, don’t do that to me?” Lena scowled at her best friend.

“Lena,” Cat cleared her throat. “I don’t want you to worry.”

“I’m worried.”

“Then shut up and stop worrying.” Cat levelled. “Jesus Christ. Only you. Only fucking you could step on to an oncology unit and feel like you have the right to be upset and wronged by the world. Yes, fine, I will write a letter or something. Just, please can you leave now?” Cat made her laugh without meaning too. She grinned despite herself, rubbing her temples. “Go. Bring actual food next week, and champagne, two bottles, something corked before we were born.”

“Cat?”

“I know,” Cat shooed, “You too.”

#soulmates #soulmate au #soulmate marks #supercorp #supercorp au #supercorp soulmate au #supercorp soulmates #supercorp femslash #supercorp story #supercorp fic #supercorp fan fic #supercorp fanfic #supercorp love story #kara x lena #lena x kara #theevangelion #cat grant #catherine grant

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bubblysunwoosworld · 3 years ago

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Loathed Love - (Part 3)

Summary:

- The life of royalty isn't as ideal as the story books depict it, and you were prepared to take on anything if it was for the greater good of your people. So what will happen if you get arranged to marry someone you don't love, but rather... someone you loathe?

Genre:

- enemies to lovers

Notes:

- Again, written by the great @justanothercamilofan !! They wrote the first three chapters and I will be writing chapters 4 and up! Hope you enjoy!

Warnings:

-cursing

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | to be continued...

Two weeks pass by before you're able to sneak out into town once more. Only this time, Carlos doesn't go with you. You wear the same disguise as you did last time, but you wear a maroon buttoned shirt with black pants, pairing it with some brown shoes as your outfit.

Attempting to sneak out the castle without getting caught proved itself to be a much harder task without the help of a certain someone, but you'd rather die than ask for the assistance of your dearest fiance.

After nearly getting caught by one of the roaming knights, you managed to obtain the sweet taste of freedom and running away from your responsibilities, even if it's just for a few hours.

The city was as busy as always. A bead of sweat rolls down your forehead and you quickly wipe it off. Just how did the people work under the sweltering heat?

Perhaps you should've worn clothes with thinner fabric. Shrugging it off, you head towards one of the shops to buy a bottle of water. Popping the cap open, you immediately drink from it; The cool, refreshing feeling it brings you feels like the greatest luxury on this planet, it's a nice contrast to the heat radiating from the sun.

"Um, excuse me? Señor... señora... Whatever it is you prefer."

You turn around to see who it was, and a familiar face greets you. You've seen this person before. Dark brown hair that matches the color of his eyes, tanned skin from being exposed to the sun and shoulder length, wavy hair that's pulled back into a long ponytail. The man before stands a few inches taller than you, probably the same height as Carlos.

"Can I help you with anything?" You asked, politely smiling at him. He returns the gesture with a smile of his own, "Sorry for approaching you out of the blue... I'm not sure if you remember, but I was the one you danced with a few weeks ago."

So that's why he seemed so familiar.

"I remember you! It was fun dancing with you, you were amazing." The smile on your face only grows wider as you recall the event before it was so rudely interrupted by that bastard you call 'your fiance'. "I never got to know your name, mine's Ariel!" You extend a hand towards him, and he gratefully takes it, slightly shaking it. "It's nice to meet you, I'm Roman."

"Roman..." You mutter the name under your breath. "It's nice to meet you too!"

The man before you released your hand afterwards. "You aren't with your, uh..." He trails off, but you know exactly who he's talking about.

"Nope, I'm not. He's rather busy today, so I decided to take a stroll around the city! I told him I'd go out beforehand though."

Well, it's not a complete lie. Carlos — or should I say, Manuel? — doesn't even know you're out here, but his schedule today sure is tight. You know this because you spent the whole morning without having to hear his annoying voice.

"Is that so?" Roman grins, "If that's the case... then I'm assuming you're free today? If I'm correct, would you like to hang out? I'd love to get to know you better."

And who were you to say no to such a polite young man?

---

The next few hours were a blast. Roman was amazing company. He was funny, kind and overall just a sweet guy. Spending time with him made you forget about everything bothering you, he was like a breath of fresh air. Maybe a friend was just what you needed. A part of you was screaming at you to tell him who you really are, but you only got to know this guy better today. When the time comes, you'll tell him eventually.

"Crap, it's getting really late Ariel." Roman spoke. "We should get you home, let me walk you back."

A nervous chuckle escapes you. "It's alright, there's no need for that. I'll be fine on my own."

"While I don't doubt that at all, I'd still like to ensure that you get home safely." The man insisted.

You gently pat his shoulder, shaking your head. "I'll get home alive and well, don't worry.",

Roman opens his mouth to speak, but you cut him off. "Besides, I don't think I want to risk the chance of Manuel seeing you and then freaking out." You joked, a hearty laugh leaving you.

The man laughs as well, "Alright then. I hope we can hang out again soon, if that's okay with you, of course."

Your eyes seemed to light up at that. "That's more than okay with me! We can become best friends!" You exclaim.

Roman cheers at that. "Best friends!"

And just like that, a friendship blossoms. For the next three weeks, you and Roman become closer. You would make time out of your busy schedule to go into the city and spend time with him, and then come back home with that dorky grin on your face. It may be just you being dramatic, but it felt as if... for the first time in a while, you were genuinely happy.

You take off the wig, giggling like a schoolgirl as you remember the earlier events. Roman baked you some cookies, they were in your favorite flavor and the texture of it was just... delightful.

After a single bite out of it, you were sure your taste buds would never be the same. He brought you to a secluded area in the city afterwards, and the both of you talk about whatever it is that comes to mind.

“You’ve got some nerve to show your face here, (Last Name).”

The grin on your face drops, you quickly whip your head around to see who spoke. It was Carlos, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. He’s glaring at you, his stare so intent that it pierces through your very soul, sending shivers down your spine.

"Where have you been running off to?" He asks, pushing himself off the wall, slowly making his way towards you. "Why's that any of your business?" You retort.

Carlos raises a brow. "How is that any of my business? I think you're forgetting something here." He lifts up your hand, showing the ring that wraps around your finger. The ring that's supposed to signify a bond built on love and trust, but you wear it for the sake of your people.

"Am I not allowed to go out and have some fun once in a while?"

Carlos' form towers over you. "You and I don't like this whole marriage thing, I know that, but I believe we've made it clear that you have to stay faithful, right?"

Now just what the fuck was that supposed to mean?

"Are you implying that you think I'm cheating?" You ask in disbelief. "Why else would you be so eager to go dress up and go out into the city?" Carlos responds, taking a few more steps towards you as you step backwards. "Do you seriously think you could get into anything serious with whoever that person is? What would you do if they found out that you are a fucking liar? They'd feel so hurt if they knew you kept your real identity a secret from them."

Your eyes widen, anger bubbling in you. "That's not true! You don't know what he's like! He's kinder than you've ever been!" You shout, glowering at him. Carlos roughly shoves you backwards, "So you are fucking someone behind my back!"

Your ball up your fists, "I'm not! He's just a friend!" You yell through gritted teeth, but Carlos doesn't seem convinced. "He's just a friend!" He mocks you, attempting to imitate your voice.

"That's what they all say, (name). For someone who's royalty, you sure are a dirty fucking wh—"

The sound of hand hitting skin echoes around the room. You slapped Carlos. He places a hand to his now reddened cheek, a menacing chuckle escaping his lips. "Oh, (name)..." Carlos looks up to meet your gaze, a smirk plastered on his face.

Carlos remains silent, only taking forward steps, forcing you to go backwards in order to leave some space between the both of you. Unfortunately, it didn't take long before your back hit the wall. Swallowing drly, your eyes remain on his. The both of you stare at each other and the tension around the room thickens, it feels almost suffocating. He places a hand on a wall, beside your head. Leaning in closer, he whispers: "You shouldn't have done that, cariño."

Your heart nearly jumps out of your chest, beating so fast and loud you were sure Carlos could hear it if he focused enough. The room feels... warmer all of a sudden and you gulp, refusing to break eye contact with the man in front of you.

"You're going to—"

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"My sincerest apologies for disturbing you during this time, but the queen sent me here to deliver a message to you, your highness."

Carlos drops his hand, sparing you one last glance before heading towards the door, opening it to reveal one of the butlers.

"It's alright, no need to apologize. I'm assuming it's something important, yes? What is it?"

He sounds so... polite. It felt so out of character for him. Your mind drifts off to other things as the two of them converse. Should you be thankful that the butler interrupted? What would happen if he never came?

"I see. Thank you for informing me about this, have a good night." Carlos spoke, smiling at the butler, who returned the gesture. Once he's left and it's just the two of you alone, the man turns to you again.

"Someone important from another kingdom is visiting in a week. If you plan on meeting up with whoever the hell that person is, you can forget about it. You'll be occupied this whole week; both of us will be busy."

Carlos makes his way towards the bathroom, but before he enters, he faces you one last time.

"This isn't over yet, (name). You're not getting off the hook so easily for what you did."

#carlos madrigal #camilo madrigal #carlos madrigal x reader #enimes to lovers #camilo x y/n #camilo fanfic #carlos x y/n

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idris-hunts-the-mando · 3 years ago

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Right place, Right time \the departure pt.1/

Rating: Mature

Words: 6.1k

A/N: this took me the bulk of a week to complete, i think ill make a few small bite sized works for a while, working on the next part in a week or so, once i get myself back together. give me all the love you as a reader can, I’m fueled by praise/hj

pairings: none yet

Warnings: series typical violence, hard swearing, moderate gore

I woke up sore and hurt in the bunk room, the cold cot felt like frozen river stones under my tired bones. I could tell we arrived at our destination from the frostbite settling into my fingers and nose. The slow neutral hum of machinery was a tell tale sign that the ship was at ease, the noise usually deafening. Pulling my threadbare scarf up over my neck and chin, i started regretting choosing this particular cargo ship going to a frozen planet for a runaway plan. I braced for the aggravating beginning to the tiresome day and sat up from my cramped bunk space. sleeping in a room with a dozen oily work worn men didnt make any part of the trip to Maldo Keris easier, not to mention the fact they all saw me as more of a womp rat and less of a sentient being. keeping my eyes to myself, i shoved my tattered boots over my feet buckled my tool belt to my hip and hurried out of the barracks before the bulk of my crew mates woke up. stepping out onto the loading dock,i took a breath in. the smell of poorly filtered air irked my mechanics brain. It would be such an easy fix if they payed me to care. But alas, for this particular voyage, i was bunked out like a stowaway, giving in return my fix-it help around deck for passage off my planet of origin. Sighing out the musty air, i checked my stations. Navigating the hold was like a womp rat through a maze, you had to be rather nimble and graceful to get through the makeshift corridors without issue. Unluckily for me, I was neither nimble nor graceful. When i got to the panel, i took out my key ring and unlocked the rusted metal door to expose the intricacies within. the wiring looked tip top shape, but the fuel lines needed a bit more attention than the other tangle of electronics, so i took out my multi-tool to tighten the fittings. The liquid distilled Rhydonium that flowed through these particular lines was a less explosive substance than its pure form, but dangerous nonetheless. the multi-tool was a newer model, so it didn't fit this type of bolt all the way, but it was better than nothing. Better than allowing it to loosen over another voyage and have the ship explode mid hyper-speed.

My mind was so stuck in its own world, the training I had over the many years in a scrappers shop spewing all of its knowings about rhydonium and fuel lines that I didn't have time to notice the first lieutenant Maegs stalking his way over to me. I jumped a moment before he spoke, tightening the last half inch of the bolt down maybe a bit too aggressively.

"We the captains crew appreciate the helping you've been do'en for this ol beasty of a ship," he mentioned, one his independent eyes viewed me separably, while the second one was monitoring my work. I froze for a moment out of fear, but i didn't think he took notice. "You're more than welcome to stick 'round 'an see what else you can fix up for this rust-bucket." the first lieutenant never gave me much of a hard time, unlike most of the crew. But I had made up my mind the first night in hyperspace that I would haul ass out of this suffocating ship as soon as a habitable planet was spotted. I finished up closing and locking the wires box, shaking my head slowly and turning to face him.

"I do love the sentiment, lieutenant. but maybe another time if our paths cross again." I forced an obligatory smile, avoiding making eye contact with him at all costs out of fear for not having the attention span to pick and stick to a wondering eye. If i could ever force myself to say something nice about the ship and its crew, it would be the acceptance of short interactions. A conversation rarely surpassed the 'how are you doing today' phase, by the moons it never got to that phase in the first place. And I was a person of not many words, and not much of a filter.

Maegs nodded slowly, clasping two of his 4 arms behind his back and turning away. I felt the need to repay his unprompted kindness with some suggestions for the ship before I left it for good. Call me sentimental, but this ship, albeit mostly composed of literal blood sweat and spit, was my ticket into a new life. "don't let yourself get caught without changing the air filtration system, them new republic scouters are picky about what type of poison you use for cremates." I remark with a little smirk. Maegs paused, narrowing his eyes, amused by the backhanded remark. He had surely gotten complaints about the smell before. He gave a thoughtful nod toward me, and allowed himself a small smile. I looked down in my hands, the key ring still hanging off my index finger. I tossed it towards him and was relieved when he caught it. he turned with no further words needed. On his way to the control room, he pushed the cargo bay door release button. My line of sight was clear from the opening door to the nearby port town and when the frosty air stung my face, I knew in my soul that this was a good thing. Taking in a breath of the salted frozen air, my body naturally recoiled. I'm not one for cold. 'Ah well, way to go picking the nearest ice planet than idiot' I scolded myself, pulling my cloak back over my shoulders to take the first step out of the ship held together with sticker line and bantha spit. 'Good riddance'.

Walking into town was harder than expected, the ice on the ground blended into the ice of the horizon, making spacial reasoning a thing of the past. The only anchor I had to the planet besides its heavy gravity was the stark grey buildings stapled to the sheets of ice about 10 meters in front of me. I never could have guessed the sky of Maldo Keris could get any uglier, but planets like these have a way of surprising a person. I tucked my hair and ears away with the hood of my raggedy travelers cloak, bracing myself from the heavy winds by retreating further and further into my cloths. I stayed on the worn path from the ship's dock port, hearing from previous crew mates that this was the warm season, that the ice was thinner and the creatures lurking underneath had no sense of remorse. Now nervous at the revival of that pleasant memory, I kept a close eye on my surroundings, not having the most faith in my feet for staying their course. The wind stung at my exposed skin, reminding me I was wearing only my work cloths that weren't meant for the sudden change in climate. The cloak I had was best at protecting my human skin from the suns above. Beyond that, my tatterd outer layer didn't do much for the safeguarding of my body heat.

I was relieved to have stumbled to shade from the wind so quickly, the heavy kit bag on my back was starting to feel more like a boulder taped to my body than a simple means of containing my tools and spare cloths. Paying attention to the signs overhead, i quickly located the nearest cantina and rushed towards it as fast as any human Popsicle can. Opening the circular doors with the press of a button took me into what felt like a summer time resort. Hiding my appreciation for the warmth from the patrons staring at me, i collected my composure and swiftly found an open table. The electronic doors closed rather harshly behind me. I recognized the sound of faulty pressure hinge and eyed the door for a moment when i took my seat. That door was a danger to customers who get caught in it, it could cause some serious injuries for larger species and even fatalities for humanoids.

Sitting down at the frosty old wooden chair was a relief on the fatigue in my joints. It was neither a comfortable seat, nor a relatively stable one, but it gave me time to take off my pack and study the small, rather ugly, room I found myself to be in. It wasn't too long before I would have to order something, or I feared starvation. The crew mates on the cargo ship were kind, if the bare minimum counts. Food once a day (as per average in the parsec), and as much sleep as necessary per species or race. For humans in particular, that amount of time was annoyingly low. tired and hungry was a bad mix for me as it is, but add cold to that mixture, and the first person to get on my nerves would be the last. i checked the contents of my bag to make sure everything looked as it should and moved up from my chair, replacing the spot with my hefty bag. I was rather confident that if any Kung Nerfhearder tried to run off with it, it would be too weighted for them to get far. I may be rather small compared to other sub species of humans, but i pride myself on my strength often.

Making my way to the bar counter, I lean up between two silent patrons sitting a few seats away from each-other. I get the barkeep's attention with a wave of my fingers, calling him to me. "What kind of meal do you have on the stove top right now?" I ask with my flattest low tone. In port towns like this its important to be as emotionless as possible in order to not draw attention to yourself. Colorless, shapeless, uniform and mad was always the role you had to play to make it through the galaxy.

"We got a silver weed in the radiator, it'll be 3 credits." He replied, picking up a glass and wiping it out with his rag covered hand. I pulled the amount needed out of my pocket and set it down on the bar counter. he swiped his hand over the credits, picking them up quickly. nodding, he left the sight of the bar for only a spit second before returning to the table with a small bowl of mush. I tried my best to smile and be thankful for the meal, but as the bowl transferred to my hands I had to focus on not gagging. I hurried back to my private table in the corner and settled back into my seat, dropping my bag on the floor between my legs to keep it as safe as possible. The last thing I want is a soup that tastes like the scrapings of a persons shoe into street worn snow, but what can you expect on a planet such as this. Prodding the gelatinous mass in the bowl with my spoon, I ponder the ever growing question of 'what in the hell is in this shit'. my mind wonders deep into its personal wonderland while my environment continues to be less and less favorable.

Hostile voices from the other side of the cantina rise louder and louder, as if at the warm up stage of a slowly progressing screaming match. The feeling of sourness in my heart rose with a predictable inclination. The tension in the air grows as yet again the same scene unfolds before my and all other patrons of the cantina's eyes. I strain my neck to see what was happening. At the far end of the room, closer to the door than I am, I saw the oddly familiar face of a poor amphibious creature's head being slammed on the table he was sitting at. The oldest and most primal of situations, the strong picking on the weak. Three tall imposing figures towered over the poor humanoid looking fellow who was obvious to any idiot to be lacking in intimidating features. Seeing this obligatory show of power for any insecure creature with anger issues never sat right with me. It reminded me too much of where I came from, the slums of sand and glass where bullies like these were treated like royalty without challenge from the ones they harassed.

'Dank ferrik, don't do it' i challenged the assaulter internally, as if pleading with them to harm their victim any more so I would have a reason to put in use my blade skills. i had no idea where I've seen that face before, but as they say, curiosity killed the Cathar. And there it happened, the final action in the escalation. The largest of the assaulter lifted the poor guy to his feet and the ring leader lifted his knife to the throat of his victim. A cry of anguish and fear came from the poor fool being restrained, and that was my last straw.

I stood from my chair, kicking away my bag and drawing my vibroblade from my thigh holster, walking over to the group across the tavern. I growl, squaring my shoulders and stiffening my legs to make me seem bigger. I must have looked pretty wild, my tattered cloak drawn over my body like a dark fog, and my scarf still pulled up like a mask over my nose with only my furious green eyes over the top. Just as I started my warpath towards the men, the heavy ring shaped door to the cantina opened abruptly, startling a few of the onlookers. I knew what type of situation I had put myself in and how important focus and intimidation was, so I didn't take any time away from the assholes with blades to gawk at who had happened to stroll in. With my attention solely married to the poor bastard and his assailants, I noticed all of their attention was stripped from their target and glued to the newcomer. Evaluating my surroundings, I saw most of the other patrons in my sight were enthralled too. This piqued my interest and I felt it safe enough to turn and check out the royalty.

Standing soberly at the bar counter, the figure of a mandolorian stood in silence, facing the bar keep. My heart dropped first, than my jaw. Only legend, only in the oldest fables and the scary stories my nan would use to scare me into not stealing the sweets late at night, had I ever heard of the likes of him. from the bescar armor forged in the heart of a black flame forge (or so i've been told) to the galaxy known creed of mandalore, this being was the stuff of leadgeneds. To be feared and adorned wherever they so chose to walk. but not anymore. Not since the planet turned to glass a hundred years ago, destroying much of what was known of the infamous warriors.

I don't think the aggressors saw me and the dangerous piece of weaponry clasped in my hand, instead they looked drunkenly amused at the new patron, like sly cats with a new toy. surveying his surroundings, the warrior's expressionless visor swept the room. He inspected the threat levels of the patrons, the bullies, the amphibious humanoid sucker that was caught under it all. The mandolorian made no comment as he momentarily swept over me, with my clenched fist around the vibroblade. Rather he ignored me entirely, leaning against the bar counter and staring absentmindedly at the wall ahead of him. The scum saw this as an odd mandolorian intimidation tactic and took it to heart, growling a string of multilingual insults. I couldn't quite understand all the words from their chosen dialect, but something about a drink spilling and how it was somehow the mando's fault.

when they didn't get a response, they snorted, puffing their chest out and stalking towards the armored newcomer. Continuing to talk in another language I didn't understand fully, the bar keep attempted to translate, feeling the tensions rise in the air. "He says you spilled his drink." a moment of silence, with the smell of anger wafting from the half intoxicated bantha shaggers, And the barman attempted to diffuse the situation by offering the men drinks to hopefully get them to settle down. And by the two suns it did not. The drink slid from the barkeep's hand and down the table. The mandolorian took it out of its trajectory and started the assault, smashing the creature's head on the counter to his right and simultaneously twisting the louder man on his left arm until the knife in his hand stabbed himself in the ass. As the third attempted to run out the front door, mando caught him with his grappling wire and pulled him back. The tangled creature got his blaster from a thigh holder and shot a round at his would-be captor. The blaster fire ricochet off the bescar Armour, bringing the mando's attention to his own firearm. With the tangled assaulter in the right position, mando fired a single shot at the door of the cantina, Forcing the wiring to go into hyperactive shut down, closing the doors around the alien. The doors struggled for a moment, and so did the thing caught in it, but nothing stopped the metal and electricity from slicing through the meat of its body. The legs of the now dead man fell to the ground at the door with a sickening thump.

After this, the silence in the room was so thick you could swing at it with a hatchet and not make a dent in the shock factor. unsurprisingly enough, every patron went back to their own businesses with each other as if nothing had happened. A pair sitting at a table close to the door went swiftly to the half body to move it away to continue the flow of traffic as they then scurried out the doors, carrying the top half between them. Scavengers i bet, black market womp rats' i thought, sighing at how quickly the circle of life can flash before your eyes. death isn't something to be dewlled on in a universe like this, now back to the issue at hand.

recollection hit me like a half ton of bricks when I remembered where I saw the face of the teal looking bastard with a knife previously on his neck. Spite flooded in my blood as I narrowed my eyes at my next target, shoving my vibroblade back in my thigh holster aggressively and stomping towards the useless excuse of flesh. "You're a dead man now, Mythrol." I said to myself. he must have heard me, or possibly sensed all the rage walking swiftly at him. His eyes upturned towards me, full of fear, but I now remember there is an ugly smugness to him too. I made it to the table, putting my hands down in front of him, leaning my top body weight on my palms. "You better have a divine excuse for not meeting me at that port you Druk Nerfhearder, or you'll be seeing the wrong side of the ice ocean outside in 30 seconds." I could barely contain my frustration with this sniveling worm, he was the reason i had to bunk with the disgusting oiled engineers for a week in hyperspace. The reason I had only 12 credits in my tech vault and less than that on hand. He scammed me out of a decent ride and my entire years savings. It was a genuine miracle how well I kept myself from not leaping over the table he sat at and giving him a new meaning to crazy bitch.

"H-hey, hey you, long time no see huh, man am I sorry for missing out on that meting we had that one time, sorry pal I kinda slept in-" but before he could make up any more exuces, any more lies, my vibroblade was at his throat right where the other man's was just a moment ago. He hissed and recoiled back in his seat, opening and closing his mouth a few times, trying to breathe, to speak. whichever it was, it wouldn't matter soon. He had talked enough in his lifetime to anger hundreds of poor victims throughout the parsec, letting him one last word would be a dishonor to all of them.

Before I could press the blade into his flesh, a firm leather covered hand wrapped around my forearm, pulling it away carefully. I looked at the arm, attached to it was a shoulder, and atop the shoulder sat a gleaming bescar helmet. I felt my heart sink into the depths of my stomach, the anger switching places with feral panic that I tried my absolute best to contain. No words came from the mandolorian, a simple shake of his head was all i got. he loosened the grip on my arm, letting it recall back to my center of gravity.Ii looked down at the arm, looking for any obvious signs of damage, but his grip was closer to gentle and firm than harsh. A soft metallic thud brought my attention to the table, where the mando has tossed a puck. A bounty puck. Today was certainly a day for emotions, because T felt as pleased as a jawa coming across the flashing screen of Mythrol's face on the holographic screen projected by the puck. Mytrol looked between me and the mandolorian a few times before painting his face with a fake smile, the wheels in his head turning into overdrive trying to make a lie up to get himself out of this one. "Is that me?" he questioned, the forced denial barely hiding the fear in his eyes. "Aw come on, I can pay you more than that pitiful bounty, a whole new cruiser," he pleaded, bargaining for his life. "on me, waddaya say."

The mandolorian doesn't waste a breath to reply, his electronically filtered voice filling the getting-to-be awkward silence. "I can take you in warm." he placed a hand on his hip holster, bringing attention to the deadly gun strapped in it. "Or I can bring you in cold." Mythroll's face turned pale with fear, looking like a sort of pale blue spirit. Gulping down what could have been vomit, or another plea for life, he couldn't move at all, just staring at the mandolorian's unfeeling visor.

The mandolorian slaps restraints on mythrol's wrists, pulling him up and out of his chair in one swift motion, the disparaged lump following along with his hands bound together. He seemed resigned to his fate as he was pulled out of the cantina, leaving in his wake and eruption of whispers and a few sobs of relief from the clientele of the bar. I myself was in a state of shock by what had happened and the intense speed at which it had occurred, Standing in front of a table with drops of blood on it not knowing what to do next. Mythrol had cheated me out of a lot of money, and he was just walking away, atoning for crimes he didn't commit against me. that in and of itself felt somewhat fair, fair to any of the galaxy he had screwed over so far.

My body flew back to my table mostly on its own, smashing into the chair at which I had just been sitting less than a minute ago. I hauled my ridiculously large bag over one shoulder, the extra strap free in the wind. I knew i had to at least try. for myself. Running back to the door panel where the halfed creature had met his end, I slammed the controls urgently, opening the door back out to the wild wind of Maldo Keris. Scanning the nearby environment was hard without protective goggles to shield me from the dust and yuck in the wind, but I spotted a pair of hulking figures 15 yards from the cantina, moving at a steady pace away. Try for me, I can do this one thing for myself. I sprinted as fast as I could with the pack over one shoulder, making me surely look like some sort of lame bantha to any possible onlookers. "Wait! wait please!" I called out to the mandolorian, my tone accidentally becoming demanding, but I think that helped to get the mandolorian's attention. They stopped and Mythrol looked at the mando, as if he was pleading to get him away from me in fear I had came back just to fight a mandolorinan for a chance to stab him again. As tantalizing as that thought was, the actions I were taking were purely selfish. I deserve justice just as much as any poor sap sad enough to cross paths with the scamming womp rat or the mystery person who called for the bounty.

"Please let me come with you for when you collect his bounty." I asked somberly, stopping my chase a few paces away from the pair standing together. "I swear I wont take the credits from you, I just want to see him pay for what he's done." Tiny beads of sweat pearled at my brow, my breath was labored in my throat. Even walking with my bag was hard, but I had just chased down a bounty hunter and his captive. Strands of my hair stuck to my forehead and I wiped them away with the back of my forearm once they crept into my eyes.

Mytrhol had to get his two cents in of course, holding the bounty hunter by the cape and making his eyes go wide with worry. "I don't know who this person is, don't let them come along, they could try to hurt me!" He plead, tugging on the cape like a whiny child. Now the anger came back, a cold rage in my fists, ready to start brutalizing someone at the drop of a pin. I narrowed my eyes at Mythrol, who didst bother to return the look. the mandolorian stared for a moment, looking off behind me in thought. The worry then set in, a fear whispered in the back of my skull 'You'll never get your closure and die alone on this hell planet.' My eyes went to the obsidian visor of the mando, creasing my brows together, subconsciously chewing on my lip as he made his decision. Loosening his shoulders, he slumped his head downward, as if morally defeated. I was taken aback by the conflict he was having about weather or not to let a weird stranger aboard his ship or not. oddly enough I understood his seeming frustration, I wouldn't let me go if I were him. He picked his head up after a second, looking me up and down as if to study me entirely. I felt eyes over my body, it was weirdly intimate. When he made his way back up to my eyes, he stood in silence for a moment before asking. "Do you have any weapons on you besides the blade?"

Certainly a different question than what I thought was going to be asked, so for the answer, I had to think about it for a moment, mentally going through my bag and person. "n, no. I have my vibroblade. and a sack full of my electrician's tools, but they arn't traditional weapons." I responded earnestly, my tone going flat again. Another moment of silence, Mythrol looking quickly between the bounty hunter and myself.

"If you truly wish to see the bounty delivered, I can take you to the trade. In exchange for the ride there, my ship needs mild internal repairs. If you try to cross me," He paused, a hand went to his blaster as a warning. A flashback to the cantina entered my forethought, the image of his hand on his blaster the same way as it was now moments before a man got cut in half. The warning was received properly, I felt thoroughly intimidated. "You'll be dead before you could pray to any gods." damn. That was intense. thoroughly intimidated, to the core. i took a breath in, almost allowing myself time to rethink my request in its entirity. but i responded with a quick nod. I knew my way around most ship interiors, if the ship wasn't rusted and breaking in half on take off, i knew i'd be able to mend it.

The mandolorian gave no other word to me and turned, walking towards the ice flats docking crew. I allowed myself a cheeky smirk, fulfillment at the succession in my pursuit gave my heart a good warm squeeze. Following along behind the mandoloian a pace, he negotiated with the docking crew, asking oddly enough for a live pilot, not a droid. Some harmonic whistling came from the ferryman, hailing over a rust bucket of a speeder. As the speeder came to a stop to collect its haul, rusted pieces of under backing fell from the rear, clanking to the ice annoyingly. We all loaded into the speeder, I sat in front with the driver, the mando and his bounty in the back, a gloved hand around Mythrol's bicep at all times. We reached out frozen destination, the driver of the speeder calling one last warning to the three of us after collecting his dues and puttering off towards the port.

I took a moment to asses the hull of the razor crest, it wasn't too bad for a pre new republic vessel. Some battle scars here and there around the landing gear, a charred blaster fire mark on the windows of the cockpit. This was truly the ship of a bounty hunter. Turning to follow the speeder's course, I couldn't help but feel a deep unease, he had warned about the ice planet's personal creature of death, Ravanack. Just then, the entire rusty hull of the speeder and its driver were swallowed whole in a single angry bite. The ravanack retreated back into the ice just as Mythroll let out a girlish scream of terror. He booked it twords the mandolorian who was opening the hatch to the belly of his ship, screaming for dear life to let him in. The ice where the speeder was swallowed started cracking in the direction of the ship, very quickly speeding directly at Mythrol.

My instincts kicked in and I hopped out of the way, swinging myself onto the floor of the cargo hold of the ship with the momentum of my bag. Just as i got out of harms way, the mandolorian swung himself out of the ship to grab the petrified blue idiot only moments before the jaws of his early death lunged out of the ice, driving sickeningly deep into the landing gear of the razor crest. I winced at the damage done, scrambling back away from the flying Mythroll the mando had haphazardly chucked at me. The mandolorian seemed to ignore me entirely, herding his bounty into the cockpit with him. As the engines revved and the propellers blasted their heat down towards the ice at max capacity, the beast clung tightly to its prey of metal and paint, determined wholeheartedly to bring the ship down to its frigid death. The mando hopped down the ladder, rushing to the cargo bay door with his riffle. he stabbed the bayonet into the beast's head, sending a current of electricity into its skull. the beast roared furiously, releasing the ship and sinking back into the inky ocean.

I collected myself and scrambled up off the floor. the cargo bay doors closed quickly, leaving the mandolorian and myself in the ambient humming of the bay. His breast plate rose and fell, getting less an less noticeable as he calmed down. turning towards me. He nodded at a upturned metal basket with a weather worn blanket tossed over it. I took the hint and put my bag on top of the makeshift stool, retrieving from it my more universal tools. Going from one job to another wasn't my ideal, but this was a more opportunistic adventure. My original goal was only ever to get off the sun bitten planet i was from, beyond that was up to fate, and I can't really complain about where it took me today. Now i'm headed to gods know where with a mandolorian and his bounty who single-handedly ruined the last year and a half's hard work I had done. turning my head towards the mandolorian, I saw him stand in the hallway between the cargo bay and the cockpit, eyeing his bounty.

Words hung on the end of my tongue, ready to ask millions of questions out of pure adrenaline fueled thrill. But I stopped myself from spilling over, taking notice of the details in the mando's body for the first time. For the most feared warrior in the galaxy, this man looked as any other bounty hunter. His armor was chipped and dented, highlighting the flaws in the outer most shell of himself. A deep rooted curiosity took roots just then, desiring to know more of what laid under his iron and bescar plates. "Where should I start working first?" I asked as politely as possible. feeling a need to use respective words when in the presence of a man who just stabbed a water beast in the head. This got his attention away from the bounty if only for a moment. He paused for a second, going through the archives of his mind to see where needed the most urgent attention. Turning 180 degrees, he lifted a gloved hand to point at the panel of buttons and levers at the end of the metal room. It looked mostly in tact, but only mostly. There was blaster char at the center of the damage, near the bottom left hand corner of the panel itself. "Yikes." I whispered mostly to myself, reaching in my bag for a clean oil rag. Acknowledging the mandolrian's request with a glance and half nod, I got to work at the station. It looked to be the control panel for the gun hold under the main cargo bay. The possible stories tied with the maiming of this piece of equipment swarmed my mind, finding my own way of theorizing any number of adventurous tales.

A few minutes go by, tweaking the damaged area as best I could to fit my hands into the circuitry. Mythroll passed by quickly, entering the open door of the munitions hold to the ladder down. I got nervous for a moment, than I heard him calling back to the mandolorian pilot, talking about molting and stellar seasons. What an odd being. Slimy thieving nerfhearder. Going back to work, not questioning the reasons tmythroll went down there. so wrapped up, figuratively and literally, in the wires of the control panel, i hadn't noticed mando sneaking past me, silent as death. I hadn't noticed him, that is, until I heard the thumping and crashing of combat and the pitiful yelps of the bounty rise to draw my attention toward the lower hold. Mythroll's shout cut short with an angry metallic hiss. The fear now taking a hold of my stomach, I pulled my hand out of the tangle to look nervously down the ladder, seeing the mando start his ascent. "carbon freezing." he said simply. I know his intention was to explain what had just happen in hopes to ease my worry, but no. it worried me more. Drawing my thought to the intense reality that I was willingly trapped on the ship of a proven dangerous bounty hunter. I felt rather idiotic in that moment, the crushing weight of the situation bringing me to a moral defeat. The mando slid by me, his body language more casual than it should have been seeing as how he had just half killed someone in the hold of his ship. He paused momentarily, looking over my work. nodding, He left in silence, returning to the cockpit.

After a second, I gathered my thoughts and took a deep breath into my lungs. The reality of my life now was flipped upside down and tossed into a spinning vortex of crazy, but I know my strengths. I know myself and what i can handle. This? was obviously odd and scary and new, but the skills I cary can get me far. Exhaling, I focused my mind at the task at hand. Knowing my entire world was going to be changing from here on out was more calming than expected. The determination I felt towards my own new chapter of life soothed my aching back and fried nerves. This was going to be epic.

A/N: i'm so glad to have finally finished this, holy hell ;-;

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ashesgraves · 4 years ago

Text

Here’s the first part of my first story!

Warnings: some violence mentioned, a few swears that’s all I think

part 2 https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646294553661423616/an-orcs-promise-part-2

Part 3: https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646373247166906368/an-orcs-promise-part-3

Part 4: https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646477938321244160/an-orcs-promise-part-4

Part: 5 https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646486100736638976/an-orcs-promise-part-5

The chosen: Ellera https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646559933035364352/an-orcs-promise

The chosen: Oridan https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/646771371691622400/an-orcs-promise

The chosen: Killian https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/647330998732881920/an-orcs-promise

The chosen: All https://yourlocalorcishbandit.tumblr.com/post/647482818600009728/an-orcs-promise

An Orcs Promise

You lived in a simple and small village in the middle of a valley not too far from a forest of fae, an ocean filled with water dwellers, a stronghold of orcs up in the mountains and a field of centaurs.

Everything was about a days trip away by horse, by foot it was typically two to three days worth of travel. It was worth it however, your village thrived with the amount of trading that was available to them. Fae providing seed and saplings already in growth, the water dwellers granting you safe travel or bountiful baskets of fish, the centaurs allowing land share for your crops and the orcs, they provided live stock and hunting goods as well as strong work hands. Doing things you humans couldn’t really do.

You lived a simple life in your simple village as a woodsmith not exactly what it’s called but you liked the title. No you couldn’t do blacksmithing it just didn’t suit you unlike it did your father and gardening/crop tending didn’t feel right like it did for your mother. So you turned to wood, of course you helped your parents but you just preferred to stick to your own, like carving or maybe the occasional building and repairing. Because of your skills you were often called ‘too manly’ and your parents were told “good luck marrying you off” however they didn’t want to do that, you’re too helpful around the shops and farm.

Your mother is a fae and your father is a human giving you some funny features and hair. Your eyes seemed like they could shift colour and you had magic freckles that disappeared with the sun. Long and wild hair that couldn’t be tamed. Your mother always made sure to call you beautiful and your father always made sure to teach you how to throw a punch. But enough of all this back story let’s talk about how three of your favourite orcs are battling in your families shop.

The twins and their older sister going full throttle displaying their strength wits and ability to strategize. It had started off as any other Saturday you were in your own shop your mother in the fields and your father in his shop. You were working on a carving to trade with one of the centaurs for a spot on their bountiful fields to grow a few trees for your upcoming project. A place of your own. You were ready to move out and start new, of course you didn’t want to leave your parents but they’ve been leaving a few hints here and there. They were ready to let you go and fly from the nest. Cheesy as that sounds that’s just how your parents are.

Heavily lost in your work until a soft moss green hand lifted your chin to face her. Ellera the eldest of the three Thundered, you always giggled at their last name but it made sense they sounded like a thunder storm when they all came roaming around.

Your face went bright red as you jumped from surprise. “Oh Ellera!!!! It’s good to see you, sorry I just got lost in my own world again.. what can I help you with?” Your voice was soft as you set your things down and put your full attention onto the orcess in front of you.

“Well my lamb you could start by getting me mother some of those boards for hackin as well as rod for the seas “ Her voice was strong and full of power with a heavy accent but it always held some softness just for you. Smiling brightly as you grabbed a few different types of cutting boards and chopping blocks for Ellera to pick from. Lastly was your prized fishing rod, carved from the finest tree you ever saw. Your best handy work.

“Take your pick! The thicker the block the more force it can handle. And this is the best of the best in my shop, just for you.” Smiling so sweet you would cause a cavity as you watched her face grow a darker shade of green. It was always your own personal mission to make Ellera blush you couldn’t help it. She was just perfect no matter what she did or how she did it.

“So you make these boards like yourself mm ??? The thicker the more you can handle~” Waltzing up beside Ellera was the older of the twins Oridan the flirtatious goof. Now it was your turn once more to blush bright in the face. Ellera on the other hand scoffed as she smacked him upside the head.

“Hasn’t mother taught ya manners you ass.” Ellera rolled her eyes but was her brother wrong? Lastly to join your conversation Killian the youngest of the family. As well as the smallest but compared to you he was still a giant. They all had tree trunk thighs, gorgeous muscles, beautifully braided and decorated hair and ears. Tribal tattoos that littered every inch of their body you wished to explore. Now now reel those thoughts back in.. “as you were saying lamb which is best for meat and which for vegetables “

Drawing you back from your thoughts you shook your head. “This one has thicker boards and the grain is going this way meaning it’ll absorb the force. Better for meats and such. This one is thinner with grain this way meaning it’s better for slicing and all” you could talk about this stuff for hours but you didn’t want to bore the siblings.

“Then we’ll get them” Ellera spoke so kindly as she took the boards under her arm and into her satchel. You knew the rest of their family would prefer to pay as one rather than separately and possibly underpaying your family. No overpaying wasn’t their issue they were happy to do so, it was possibly underpaying you that they worried about. Your family always took good care of them when they needed, the first of your village to show them such kindness and hospitality.

“Oh Ellera here I have something for you.” Gingerly taking the orcesses hand in your own you lead her to your little safe. Digging around the box for a moment you found what you were searching for. A beautiful hand crafted obsidian necklace. You knew orcish traditions you knew this was you asking Ellera to court you. “It’s obsidian, it’s too heavy of a stone for me so I thought you would like it. W-Will you accept..”

“You know what this means correct??” You were no dummy of course you knew, so you gently nodded your head. “Of course l will it’s beautiful thank you my lamb.” Ellera smiled brightly and turned to her brothers with an all knowing smirk. “ suck it losers I have won!!!!! My dearest little lamb had chosen me. Now butt out of the shop before I take both of your heads and put them on a platter. “ You couldn’t help but snicker a bit at her words, it’s just how she was with those two.

Now this leads us to where we are at the moment. Ellera taking off her satchel and her necklace before brawling it out with her brothers. You hadn’t known the twins also had an eye for you, looking around your shop there stand their parents with your own. All of them had the what the hell happened and is going on look. You could only smile sheepishly as you weaved your way through the mass of limbs colliding with one another. “So I’ve asked Ellera if we could court per orcish tradition and I didn’t even know the twins had a thing for me. And now their battling it out because the twins think Ellera had an unfair advantage and can you please stop them before they break anything in my shop??? Oh and Mrs. Thundered I had Ellera pick out some lovely cutting boards and butchers blocks for you !! “ The orc parents laughed and shook their heads at your little story. They can deal with all this after they save your shop from being ripped apart.

Mrs. Thundered grabbed Ellera with most of her might and tossed the girl over her shoulder. While Mr. Thundered grabbed the two boys and held them apart like bickering cats. “Now before you break this lovely shop why the hell are you all fighting. I swear we raised you better than to fight inside. “ Mrs. Thundered spoke sternly as she glared at all of her children. Collecting all the items they have picked out you rang them up while the parents took their kids outside and had a much different conversation than in the shop.

It took maybe twenty minutes of waiting before the orc family came back inside. The boys a flustered mess and Ellera grumpily huffing and sighing as her mother held her back. “Boys. Go. “ you laughed a bit at how large they were compared to you but yet in this moment they seemed so small. “Boys.” Her tone was much sterner maybe the sternest you had ever heard. Tilting your head up to the twins you smiled softly .

“W-Will you accept our own courting gifts.. and by the end of the courting months you can pick who wish to be with the most. “ it was Killian who spoke which surprised you he was always so shy and cautious of his words.

“I mean it’ll obviously be me.. I don’t even know why we have to wait months! Right sugar ???” Oridan made you laugh as he nudged his brother aside to hand you his gift. A simply terribly carved handle but with a beautiful dagger blade attached. You had no idea how he even managed to do such small carvings in the metal. “I know the handle isn’t pretty but I thought maybe you would help me with that.. “ now all of a sudden his loud and boisterous self was no more than just like his twin.

Killian however seemed a bit more confident with his gift a beautiful fur lined cloak. You had no idea he could sew.. “Boys these are both beautiful in their own ways.. but Ellera..?? How would it work what if I can’t choose ? What will happen then ? A fight to the death? “ Ellera nodded and pulled out her own gift she didn’t need to give it to you but she wanted to. Just to out shine her brothers once more. It was a crystal vase with preserved flowers encased inside.

“It wouldn’t be to the death just to where the other two can no longer rise to their feet. Any other orc yes to the death. “ Oridan spoke up once more, you loved all of them but you never thought the twins were interest in you Oridan maybe but, that was just you thinking he was joking. “So please.. will you accept?”

“I will, all three of us can court each other. Until then you need to work on your wood skills how did you not loose a finger and Krillian this is gorgeous I didn’t know you could sew like this. Ellera of course this is gorgeous but what if it breaks ?? What if I shatter it ???? “ The orcess simply laughed and shook her head.

“It can’t shatter I promise hun how can I promise such a thing, well me and my big man hands made it. “ Ellera smiled willy her dark oak brown eyes shining gleefully as she started down to you. Puffing out her chest showing off her muscles it was her final display of strength before her mother dragged her off to the horses.

“I look forward to this.. I haven’t always been able to sew just with the changing seasons I thought you would get cold so I took up the skill for you. “ That immediately made your heart melt. Killian took up a whole hobby just to be able to provide for you. With his Killian getting the last day of the three siblings they all went off on their way home.

Oh dear, how could you choose..

#fantasy #fanfic #fluff #reader insert #orc girlfriend #orc boyfriend #orcs #orc siblings #exophilia #fighting over you

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cooking-thru-shortstack · 3 years ago

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Raviolo with Ricotta & Herbs - 5 Stars

Vegetarian: yes

Vegan: no

gluten free: no

At last. I've made this for the first time very recently and it was a revelation. It was decadent, rich, and intensely comforting to eat and fun to make (though I was lucky enough to have a partner to help, and a fancy new pasta roller).

It was also the first recipe in this book I had the foresight to take at least one photo of the process, so here you go:

Doesn't that already look good? Because it was. Even using the pasta roller was magic, taking this raw dough and feeding it through the machine, thinner and thinner, smoother and smoother, finer and finer, until you have refined sheets of delicate dough that could easily become noodles.

The idea is the yolk is cooked just enough with the ravioli that it's still runny when you take a bite into it, saucing the pasta from the inside. And. It. Is. Fantastic.

Obviously this is a more advanced recipe, as it fundamentally relies on you owning a pasta roller as otherwise it's impossible. Finesse when placing the egg yokes is key, as is very very gently enveloping them with the top sheet of rolled out pasta dough. But it's worth it.

Ian says that it serves 6 as it makes 6 raviolis, and each diner gets one. You hear that, you greedy pigs? Just one of these bad boys is all you can handle. Obviously, both my boyfriend and I ate 3 each, and were perfectly capable of handling them.

Ingredients:

For the dough:

1 cup cake flour

1/4 cup all-purpose flour

2 large eggs

1 1/2 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil

1/4 cup warm water

Kosher Salt

For the filling:

2/3 cup fresh ricotta

1/4 cup finely chopped fresh herbs (such as basil, oregano, chervil and/or chives), plus more for serving

4 tsp fresh lemon juice, divided

Kosher salt and pepper

6 large egg yolks

8 tbsp (1 stick) unsalted butter [we used 3/4 stick...tryna be heart healthy, lol]

Make the dough: Place the flours, yolks, oil, water, and 3/4 teaspoon of salt in a food processor [we used my new fancy stand mixer with a dough hook, worked just as well], then pulse until a ball of dough forms. Shape the dough into a disk and wrap it in plastic wrap. Let the dough rest at room temperature for one hour.

Cut the dough into quarters, then roll out each piece using a pasta machine until it is at the second-thinnest setting. Place the rolled dough on a floured work surface and loosely cover it with plastic as you go. [Do not overlap the past sheets if possible, as they will tend to stick to each other.]

[Note: Ian doesn't say what length or width the past sheet should be, and that's largely because it depends on your pasta roller. My sheets came out to be roughly 6 inches wide and 16 - 18 inches long, depending on the amount of dough in each.]

Make the filling: In a bowl, stir together the ricotta, herbs, and 1 teaspoon of lemon juice with 1/2 teaspoon each salt and pepper. With the rolled sheet of dough in front of you, place a scant 3 tablespoons of the filling the mound a few inches from the end of the dough, then place another 2 mounds of filling every 5 inches apart to make 3 total mounds of filling on the sheet of dough.

[Ok, so for this math to work out exactly, you'll need a sheet of dough that is at least 18 inches, which you may or may not get. Most of mine didn't get this long, so the best thing to do is to start with the nests of filling on the outer edges of the sheet, then equally space the middle one. At most I think I had three inches between my fillings, which was still more than enough room to make the raviolo into equal pieces.]

Form each mound of filling into a nest, then place 1 yolk in each nest of filling.

[Do be gentle here, as the last thing you want is to break the yolk and ruin the work. try to make the nest as deep as you can, with a healthy amount of filling on each side.]

Brush the dough around the filling with water, then drape another rolled sheet of dough over the first sheet. Gently press the top sheet of dough around each mound of filling to remove any air bubbles, then cut away the edges and sides to make 3 large, square ravioli. Make 3 more ravioli in the same manner using the remaining dough, filling and yolks. Keep the ravioli on a lightly floured baking sheet, gently draped with plastic wrap, until you're ready to cook them.

[It doesn't say to crimp the edges, but just do it. It doesn't hurt and I think it lowers the chance of it breaking in the boiling water. Or don't, if you're a pasta purist.]

[This is what mind ended up looking like!]

Heat the butter in a large heavy skillet over medium-high heat, stirring continuously, until it just begins to brown and is fragrant and nutty. Remove the skillet from the heat and continue to stir the butter as it continues to brown. Stir in 1 teaspoon of salt and the remaining 1 tablespoon of lemon juice.

Bring a large pot of salted water to boil. Gently add the ravioli and cook at a gentle boil until the pasta is tender, about 3 minutes (the yolks will still be runny), then carefully transfer them to the butter in the skillet. Divide the ravioli among 6 serving plates, drizzle with some of the butter and sprinkle with some more of the herbs. Serve immediately.

#eggs #ravioli #pasta #homemade pasta #ricotta #herbs #vegetarian #cooking #Ian Knauer #short stack editions

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okay-tumbler · 3 years ago

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So, of course today is 4th of July and I went to my aunt's for lunch as I said in one of my last posts. My family's reaction to my weight was a little weirder than it usually is.

I've explained before that this side is extremely diet obsessed. Usually one or more of them are always on a diets and the aunt's house I went to wouldn't touch a cookie if you paid her.

Nevertheless, my grandmother, this aunt's sister, was admiring my cropped button up and took it off of me and so saw me in just my tank top and started feeling up on my ribs and stomach and hip bones like she does every time she sees me. Then she honestly surprised me by telling me "you look really good, but you really need to stop losing weight". I told her I wasn't and was just trying to maintain it so no one would get onto me bc everyone knows about my Ed since I've been hospitalized bc of it before and obviously my mother told her side bc she was upset and needed support. I don't blame her for that.

My grandmother says the perfect size for a woman is a size 5 or whatever equates for her height. Personally, I think I'm about a size 4 now bc all of my jeans are a 6 and everything is very loose and needs a belt to fit. Especially the jeans I wore, which she was also admiring and then started pulling at my waist band bc my belt was bunching up the waist since they were loose.

Then my great grandmother came in and goes "everytime I see y'all, hunter (my little brother) grows 3 inches taller and Dez (me) gets 3 inches thinner." And then said something about me needing to stop losing weight. I don't think my mother told her about my Ed as that's not really something she'd discuss with her grandmother.

I really didn't think that my family's excitement of my weight loss would stop this soon. I've only lost 5lbs since I last saw them, but I guess 5lbs is a lot on smaller frames and I'm also pretty short.

Anyways, thanks for skimming through my rant 😂

#bulimxa #anorekcia #anorekic #anorexik #thinsppi #model thin #thin insp0 #thin inspiration

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hieludoboi · 4 years ago

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A List of Things I’d Like to do With You (Pt 4/9)

A/n- hahahahahah this got deleted but I had it saved on my grammarly and prowritingaid accounts so we’re gucci. Just gotta proofread now

A/n- this is just me indulging my Bokuroo fantasies tbh

Links- Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5

Summary- Cute little carnival/amusement park date

Pairing- Daichi/Fem!Reader

Word Count- 6,000+

Trigger Warnings- Sick reader, terminal illness, vomit, blood, pretty sad, crying

________________________________________________________________

Daichi’s mother sighed as she sat on the park bench, a watchful eye over her three-year-old son. Daichi was running as best as he could through the sand, finding joy in kicking it up as he ran. The park was empty, filled only by Daichi’s occasional giggles and the creaking of the swings gently swaying in the evening breeze.

Daichi wasn’t always the most social of children, being too shy and scared to play with the other children, and his mother desperately hoped that bringing him to the park would help him open up. It was rare that Daichi would want to play with the other children, preferring to observe them instead. But then she had shown up to the park.

A younger woman with a chubby little girl who couldn’t stop laughing or smiling. From the moment she had wobbled into the park, it seemed to grow brighter. Daichi was instantly drawn to her, his eyes following her all over the park while she ran around with different groups of children.

Though, Mrs. Sawamura had to admit that the little girl had quite the character. It seemed like an eternity before Daichi stopped staring and finally walked towards her. The little girl was running around with a group of kids, giggling and laughing while they played tag. Daichi’s mother watched her son, smiling as he slowly started walking towards her, a shy smile on his face.

And then he stopped in his tracks, eyes wide as she ran blindly towards him, head turned to the side to look at her mother with a wide smile. In two seconds they had knocked into each other, falling into a heap of limbs onto the sand. The little girl cried, face scrunched up while one hand covered the bruise on her shin. Mrs. Sawamura ran towards the children, looking up in time to see an apologetic and sweet-faced woman rushing towards the children.

Before either of them could get to the children, Daichi had leaned forward, his forehead bumping against the girls with a soft ‘knock’. Both women stood in shock behind their children, watching as they looked up and giggled, wide grins and closed-eyed smiles as they bumped heads again. In the amount of time it took them to realize what had happened, Daichi had stood, helping up the little girl before she pulled him off to her group of friends.

“Oh. Well, that went better than I thought.” Mrs. Sawamura giggled at the stunned look on the woman’s face.

----------------------------

“All together, we have...... around 580 yen.” Daichi sighed, leaning back on his palms. It was cool outside, the spring breeze wafting between the trees and grass while Daichi and Y/n sat on Y/n’s porch. The convenience store wasn’t too far away, and their parents wouldn’t be home for another hour or so. As two fourteen-year-olds, they didn’t have too many options. It was either wait and starve or walk to the convenience store down the street and bicker over what they would share.

“That’s enough for some onigiri and drinks!” Y/n determined, placing her fist in her hand, a grin on her face. Daichi groaned, shaking his head. He was not in the mood for onigiri.

“It’s enough for some meat buns and drinks.” Daichi corrected a satisfied smile on his face. Daichi could practically feel Y/n’s entire face scrunch from beside him.

“Onigiri.” Y/n grumbled, glaring at the side of Daichi’s face. Daichi scowled, turning to look at Y/n, a dark look on his face. Y/n’s eyes widened, her body trembling. Daichi’s ‘serious’ face was scary, but she would not waver.

“Why don’t we just do one meat bun and one onigiri, problem solved,” Daichi suggested. Y/n groaned, dragging her palms down her face.

“We discussed this already! Onigiri is like 100 yen each, which leaves 280 yen for drinks and maybe chips! Meat buns are 200 each, that leaves only 180 for drinks and snacks! Onigiri are cheaper and yummier!“ Y/n argued, huffing when Daichi rolled his eyes.

“You two are ridiculous. Just get one meat bun, one onigiri, and you’ll have enough for drinks.” Y/n and Daichi looked up, momentarily breaking their staring contest to see Suga shaking his head above them.

“Suga, one onigiri will not be enough to pull me through the day!” Y/n explained, an exasperated look on her face. Daichi nodded, agreeing with her for once that day.

“Yeah, one meat bun will not be enough!” Daichi echoed, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I think you’ll survive. Besides, your guys’ parents will be home soon to make dinner.” Suga reasoned. Y/n hummed, deep in thought. Daichi narrowed his eyes, seeming to contemplate Suga’s words.

“You may have a point.” Y/n mumbled. Suga smiled, reaching down to help Daichi and Y/n up from the porch.

“Let’s go then, yeah? My friend’s grandma runs the convenience store down the street and said they’re having a special on onigiri, so let’s go!” Suga whined. Y/n giggled, standing up and sticking her tongue out at Daichi.

“Told you Onigiri are more cost-efficient!”

“Those were not your exact words!” Daichi grumbled, standing up to trail behind Suga and Y/n.

-------------------------

It was one of those rare Saturday afternoons that Ukai had given them off. With nationals inching closer and closer, their free time seemed to be growing thinner. Practices took up most, if not all of his time. Yet still, he made time to go visit her. With the winter fast approaching, and the snow threatening to fall, Daichi found himself bringing her fresh flowers as often as he could.

Walking into the cemetery no longer had the effect it once did. The smell of chrysanthemums still stung his nose, but his rage was becoming less and less. He had taken Suga’s and Asahi’s advice, keeping her alive through his memories. It was a nice sentiment, and maybe it wasn’t how he wanted to spend his life with her, but it was much better than acting as if nothing had happened. Yet still, he was running out of things to talk about with her, the only things left being her list and her death. And while Daichi was happy to laugh and talk about their air balloon ride and their night under the stars, he was still not ready to remember how she died in his arms, face scrunched in agony, eyes glassed over as she realized her death was inching nearer. He didn’t want to think about the way she screamed, squeezing his hand purple while she begged the doctors to make it stop. Daichi sighed, pinching his temples and shaking his head. Not yet. He still had good things to talk about.

Daichi took in a deep breath, relishing in the way the crisp December air stung his nostrils and chilled his chest. Lately, there had been no one to greet him at her grave, only flowers left by the other boys who would come on their free time, even some things from Bokuto and Kuroo who had been friends with her when her family moved to Tokyo for a few years before coming back, their friendship being rekindled at the training camp.

He had recently become friends with the owners of a small flower shop. They were quite the pair, the old lady being very brash and opinionated, keeping the old man laughing and on his toes. The old man was serious, her exact opposite. He seemed to keep her grounded, stable, and unwavering. In some ways, Daichi could see Y/n in the woman, and himself in the old man, and it made his heart ache. He wondered if they would have led a life like that. Old and wrinkled, yet still full of life, a little shop all their own crawling with grandchildren every Saturday, their children coming in every Monday to help carry heavy vases.

This time, Daichi held a bouquet of yellow tsubakis in his hand. He grunted, settling in the cold and stiff grass, placing the bouquet next to the purple bell flowers that he could only assume one of the boys had brought her.

“Sometimes I feel stupid for coming to talk to you. You’re dead, donezo as you would say... Sometimes I come and see Suga sitting here just talking the day away, telling you about everything and I feel stupid. I just- I don’t know why everyone’s okay with it and I’m not. You’re not suffering or anything anymore, but-” Daichi could feel his jaw clench, his eyes snapping shut to prevent any tears, but they fell. They spilled as if fleeing from a broken damn, dripping down his face onto his pants and shirt. He felt stupid.

It had been so long, and he thought he was getting over it. Just last week he had sat with Asahi and talked to him with a smile on his face. He attended practices and acted as a good captain should. He felt fine, so why was he crying? Why did things suddenly become hard? How come all his progress seemed to get washed away by tsunamis of sorrow?

“Kou, she doesn’t like bell flowers!”

“Tetsu- yes she does! Which one of us did she go to school with, hmm?”

“Ugh, you, but-”

“Exactly! I know her better than you do!”

Daichi looked up, his vision blurred by his tears, his body trembling and weak. Hurriedly, Daichi wiped at his eyes, hoping to wipe away any traces of his pain.

“Huh, Daichi? Are you okay?” Bokuto’s voice was soft, full of worry and sympathy. His eyes were rounded and soft, a small frown tugging at his lips. Daichi nodded, sniffing, and turning to look at the trees behind him. He was fine. It had been months, he had to be fine at this point.

Daichi could hear both captains huff before plopping down beside him, the bottom halves of their faces covered by scarves. Bokuto turned to look at him, his smile hidden behind his scarf but present in his warm eyes. Kuroo offered Daichi a smile, reaching over to place the purple bell flowers beside Daichi’s bouquet.

They sat there in silence for a moment, Bokuto twiddling his thumbs while Kuroo stared off into the distance, eyes focused on nothing in particular. Daichi could hear Bokuto fiddling beside him, humming while he played with his scarf. Who knew encounters outside of the court could be so awkward.

“Hey, uhm, not to be rude, but are you feeling okay?” Bokuto asked, his bottom lip caught between his teeth in worry. Daichi looked up in surprise, his eyes locking with Bokuto’s.

“Uh, yeah. I’m pretty okay, I guess. It’s just hard...” Daichi mumbled, his hand holding onto the back of his neck, cheeks dusted over with a soft blush.

“Well, at least two of us are doing okay. Bokuto seems to bawl his eyes out every other day just by thinking about her. You’d think they were soul mates with the way he cries.” Kuroo scoffed, leaning back on his palms, gazing at the clouds in the cold and gray sky.

“We weren’t! We were just good friends, and it hurts to lose someone you cared about! I may not have been as close to her as Daichi, but she was still my friend and I miss her. A lot, okay!? And at least I process my feelings instead of being a jerk like you!” Bokuto retorted, tears pooling in his eyes, his hand reaching up to pull down his scarf so he could yell at Kuroo. “Maybe if you had an Akaashi, you would know how to process your emotions in a healthy way!” Bokuto added, turning his entire body, his lips in a pout while he sniffled. Daichi’s eyes widened as he looked between both males. What happened?

Kuroo’s eyes seemed to soften, a soft sigh escaping his lips. Daichi chuckled when Kuroo gave him an apologetic smile before crawling towards Bokuto to sit next to him, his arms wrapping around Bokuto.

“Kou, I’m sorry, bro. I know it’s hard, and you’re doing a great job. I’m proud of you, bro, so forgive me?” Bokuto wrapped his arms around Kuroo, nodding his head before pulling away to wipe his tears away.

Daichi couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face and the laugh that left his lips. Their bickering reminded him of the way Y/n used to pick fights with him when she was bored. It made his chest fizzle with warmth, his cheeks feeling warm and pink with joy. He understood why she adored those two as much as she did.

“What’s so funny?” Bokuto huffed, his mitten clad hands still wiping at his eyes. Daichi shook his head, the grin still on his face.

“It just reminds me of the way Y/n and I used to argue.” Daichi chuckled, staring at the silver bracelet on his wrist with fondness.

“Tetsu! What if we’re soulmates!” Bokuto gasped, his hands gripping Kuroo’s shoulders, shaking him. Kuroo groaned, but couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face.

“You’re my world, bro!” Kuroo declared, laughing at Bokuto’s antics. Daichi felt his smile drop a bit. They thought Y/n was his soulmate? Was she? Daichi stared at the flowers, deep in thought. Perhaps they were soulmates.

“Oh! That reminds me! Y/n promised to tell me about the carnival! But, you know...” Bokuto mumbled, his eyes focused on his crossed knees. Daichi looked up, his eyes seeming to twinkle a bit at the mention of the memory.

“Oh! Yeah, for sure, She got a spike to the face that day...” Daichi admitted, a bashful smile on his face.

---------------------------

Garbage. That’s the only way she could describe the way she felt. Her face clung onto a sickly pale and yellow undertone. The meat that used to reside on her bones had become a snack for the reaper that loomed above her head. Her eyes were like grainy and murky pearls resting in the deep and hollow pits of clamshells, and her cheekbones spiked through her skin like mountain peaks. Okay, so maybe she didn’t look that horrendous. In reality, she had shed maybe ten pounds? But she felt disgusting, her body wasting away into nothing. At her doctor’s appointments, she was told that she was surprisingly healthy, told she was fine, and maybe it was because they weren’t living with death that they didn’t see what she saw.

Yet, even with the constant threat of death, she found something to keep her happy. At the moment, it was her relationship with Daichi. As promised, they tried. It wasn’t all kissing and cuddles; it wasn’t just romantic, but Y/n liked it. She liked the warmth that spread across her body whenever Daichi held her hand. She lived for the way he gazed at her. She adored the massages to her scalp, the kisses to her knuckles as they laid in his bed. The study dates, each celebratory hug after each game that was won, the little bits of intimacy that suddenly were sprinkled all throughout their interactions. It was subtle, nothing to hoot and holler about, but it made her happy.

As per Daichi’s request, the events on her list were now planned, having a time and date. Though she lived for the spontaneous moments in life, she also liked knowing when things were happening. Even a person as chaotic as she could enjoy stability from time to time.

Y/n hummed to herself as she rolled in the five-gallon cooler filled with water. Kiyoko trailed behind her, checking things off of her clipboard and occasionally shooting Y/n a question or two.

“Y/n-San!” Y/n looked up in time to see Noya and Tanaka running at her, hands outstretched to try to catch the volleyball that Asahi had accidentally sent flying her way. She couldn’t move, her feet practically glued to the ground. Before she knew it she was stumbling and tripping over her feet, her body falling onto the hard gym floor. Y/n groaned, holding the side of her head, her vision out of focus and her temples throbbing. Everything was spinning, and the familiar burn at the base of her throat began to bubble. Before Daichi or anyone could react, Kiyoko quickly helped her up, rushing Y/n to the bathroom.

Y/n cried as she hunched over the toilet, Kiyoko rubbing her back to comfort her. It hurt, it hurt so bad, and all Y/n could do was sob and heave as the sick and blood flew from her lips. She hated that Kiyoko had to see it, hated that someone knew. No one was supposed to know.

“Y/n...” Y/n looked up at Kiyoko to see her hand covering her mouth, tears welling in her eyes. “W-we need to call an ambulance, or-or take you to the doctor-” Kiyoko stuttered, her hand shaking as she reached for her phone.

“No! N-” Y/n heaved, gagging and wincing as nothing came up. “Please, no. I’m okay. I-” Y/n shuttered as she wiped the blood from her lips, looking down at the back of her hand to stare at the blood. “Sit.” Y/n patted the floor next to her. The bathroom floor was filthy, but she couldn’t find the strength she needed to stand. She still felt so light-headed, her vision going in and out of focus. Kiyoko nodded, sitting down beside Y/n, her hand still gripping her cell phone.

“Please. Don’t tell anyone, I- I don’t want anyone to get upset.” Y/n stuttered, wincing as she hiccuped, the taste of sick and metallic blood coating her mouth and tongue. Kiyoko stared at Y/n, her eyes soft and sad. Though her hand was still trembling, she reached out, gently taking Y/n’s hand into her own.

“I have terminal stomach cancer.” Y/n whispered, her hand gripping onto Kiyoko’s with a vice-like grip. It was the first time she had admitted to anybody that she was sick. It was the first time she had acknowledged she was sick. Y/n looked away, covering her mouth with her free hand to muffle the soft sobs that spilled from her lips. She was sick. Dying, she was dying and there was nothing that could cure or save her. No amount of treatment in the world could kill the cancer that was already spreading through her body, tearing it apart like a rabid and hungry animal. She was dying.

Y/n shook her head, her body trembling violently, the sobs spilling from her lips growing in volume. Oh god, she was sick. Kiyoko sniffled, pulling her into a hug on the filthy bathroom floor, holding her tightly against her body as she sobbed into her shoulder. Y/n was heaving, crying and practically screaming into Kiyoko’s shoulder, the hurt reverberating through her chest, filling the bathroom with a solemn haze. Soon, there was nothing left of her voice, her mouth meekly hanging open in a silent scream, her erratic breathing rocking her body to the core.

It’s not like Kiyoko hadn’t seen it. In fact, most of the other boys had probably seen it too. Her eyes, though still bright, were now dull. Her body seemed to be subtly wasting away, the fullness of her face subduing. She wasn’t gaunt; she wasn’t terrible, but anyone who knew her well enough could notice it.

----------------------

Daichi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose while Asahi, Noya, and Suga bickered in the background. Noya had been teasing Asahi for the past fifteen minutes about how his spike knocked Y/n to the ground. Suga had kept telling Noya to leave Asahi, but Noya was relentless in his attacks, leaving poor Asahi sulking and damn near close to tears.

“Short stack! Leave Man Bun alone or you’ll be running laps!” Ukai screamed, his eyebrows furrowed with anger. Daichi laughed, shaking his head as Noya instantly stopped, practically trudging back to the court to work on his receives. While they were poking fun at Asahi, Daichi couldn’t help but wonder how Y/n was doing. She had taken a spike to the face, and was struggling to get up, her face going pale while she stumbled over her feet.

Speak of the devil, Daichi thought to himself, breathing a sigh of relief as Y/n walked back into the gym, Kiyoko right by her side. Daichi stared at her as she walked by, his eyes raking over every detail of her face. She seemed a bit dizzy, her eyes glassed over and her skin a little ashen, but nothing seemed too out of the ordinary. He hummed to himself, his eyes focusing on the redness of her eyes and the swelling of her cheeks. Had she been crying? Daichi turned around, eyes meeting Ukai's, silently asking for permission. Ukai gave him a curt nod and Daichi silently thanked him before jogging towards Y/n who was sat next to Kiyoko on the stage.

"You okay?" Daichi asked, taking her hands in his, his thumbs brushing lightly over her knuckles. Y/n sniffled, leaning forward and letting herself be caught against Daichi's chest. Daichi grunted, chuckling as she buried her face into his chest.

"Did it hurt that much?" Daichi teased, bringing a hand up to gently massage the back of her head. Y/n huffed, pulling back to butt her head against Daichi's.

"Jerk. If you caught one of Asahi's spikes with your face you'd be crying too!" Y/n retorted, sharply turning her head so Daichi could only see her cheek.

"Wow. So that's how it is!" Daichi huffed, leaning forward to nudge his nose against her cheek. He laughed as Y/n gasped, eyes going wide with embarrassment. He loved seeing her get all flustered. She obviously wasn't doing too bad, but Daichi still couldn't shake the feeling that something was off.

"It is! Now hurry so we can go on another escapade! You take way too much time in the shower to be idling by!" Y/n said, pushing Daichi away from in between her legs so he could join the others.

----------------------

"Okay, can you tell me where we're going?" Daichi asked, leaning slightly to the left to lean his head against Y/n's shoulder as she drove. Y/n huffed, shrugging his head off of her shoulder before pulling into a relatively empty parking lot. "Is this- are we at an amusement park?" Daichi stared at Y/n with disbelief. An amusement park?

"Yes, sir!" Y/n chirped happily, unbuckling her seatbelt to practically jump out of the car. Daichi sighed, dragging himself out of the car. It's not that didn't want to be there, but the smell of hotdogs and grease, fried foods, and the occasional pile of vomit were not the least bit appealing to him. But the smile on her face was all he needed to look at to go along with her plan.

She called them escapades, little adventures they took based on her bucket list. She always seemed to be teeming with glee whenever they completed one. Her eyes regained their usual glint, her smile was no longer restrained, and the color even began to seep back into her skin. It was the only reason Daichi let himself be dragged along.

"So... Games or rides?" Y/n questioned, taking his hand in hers as they walked into the park. Daichi hummed, looking around the park and contemplating his options.

"Games first. I wanna be corny and win you a huge stuffed animal." Daichi said, nodding his head with determination and placing his fist on his palm. Y/n laughed, shaking her head in amusement. She was relaxed, leaning into Daichi's side and playing with his hand as they looked for their first game.

"Bet you I can win you a stuffed animal before you can!" Y/n teased, pulling away from Daichi, a sly grin on her face. Daichi tutted, staring at her in surprise. Her competitive streak hadn't shown itself in a while.

"Oh? How much do you wanna bet?" Daichi questioned, leaning close to her face, a smirk on his face.

"If you lose, which you will, we go get onigiri!" Y/n grinned, leaning forward, almost closing the gap between them.

"Fine. If I win, which I definitely will, we go get meat buns." Daichi declared, closing the gap between them to capture her lips in a playful kiss. Y/n pulled away, casting her gaze off to the side while her fingers played with the bottom of her shirt. As flustered as she was, she would not lose!

-------------------------

It took a while before they finally settled on ring tossing. It took a lot of bickering and convincing, but there they were, glaring at each other as they practically ripped the rings out of the poor worker's hands.

"I'm gonna beat you, Sawamura." Y/n threatened, her gaze still locked onto Daichi's.

"That's rich coming from you, L/n." Daichi's voice was cold with a playful lilt, the same smirk still plastered onto his face. Y/n tutted, breaking the staring contest to instead focus on the game. Not because Daichi's smirk made her flustered, totally not because of that, not at all...

Daichi laughed, practically throwing his head back at the scowl that adorned Y/n's face. Y/n could feel her face scrunch, but she paid no attention to Daichi or his antics. She took a breath before throwing her first ring, groaning as it clung to the rim of the bottle before slipping off.

"What'd you say, L/n?" She could hear the stupid smirk in his voice. God, she wanted to punch him in his stupidly handsome face sometimes. Daichi gave her a smug look, tossing one of his rings and waiting for it to land. Only it didn't, not even close. It flew short, falling before it could reach it. Y/n could feel the laughter burst from her chest like water flowing from a broken dam.

"Dude! Oh my god! You should see the look on your face right now!" Y/n was cackling, doubling over and holding onto her sides, wheezing while tears pooled in the corners of her eyes. Daichi was hunched over, eyes locked on the fallen ring on the dirt floor. He? Missed? Daichi watched as Y/n stood back up, her cheeks glistening with tears of laughter. He had four rings left, he still had a good shot of getting all three bottles.

"Doesn't count," Daichi grumbled, scowling when Y/n continued to tease him.

"Daichi! Watch this!" Y/n called, easily tossing a ring onto the rim of the bottle. Daichi stood straight, eyes locked onto the rims. He was going to win. He wasn't the most pride obsessed person on the planet, but he'd be damned if their dinner wasn't some tasty, big, and juicy meat buns. Y/n straightened after leaning over to throw her third ring, visibly deflating when it missed. She had two more rings, and only two bottles left. Daichi still had a chance.

Daichi cleared his throat, standing tall when Y/n turned to look at him with confused eyes. He made sure to make a grand display, picking up the ring with exaggerated gesture and leaning over with his butt sticking out before daintily throwing the ring, watching with a smile as it spun around the rim before falling in place around the neck. Y/n groaned, turning away instead to focus on her bottles. She was a prideful person, and losing a bet she made did not sit well with her at all.

"And we have a winner!" Y/n looked up in surprise, mouth hanging open as Daichi smugly stood with his hands on his hips.

"Take your pick, Y/n." Daichi's smile was wide, spreading across his face and leaking into his eyes and the red tips of his ears. Though her pride had been badly bruised by the loss, she couldn't help but feel giddy as she pointed to the massive frog that sat atop the rest of the plushies. Daichi thanked the man running the stall as he gave him the frog, turning to place the stuffed frog in Y/n's open and waiting arms.

"Thank you." Y/n murmured, leaning forward to place a chaste kiss to Daichi's cheek. She could feel the warmth rush into his face the moment she pulled away, his mouth hanging slightly open.

"It was nothing,” Daichi admitted, rubbing the back of his neck while he looked around the rest of the park.

"More games? Or do you wanna go on rides?" Y/n asked, her chin resting on the top of her frog plush. Daichi tapped his chin in thought. They had many options here. They could waste their money on more games and probably not win prizes because let's face it, these games are rigged. They could use their bracelets to their advantage and ride every ride they had to offer, which probably wasn't a good idea as both of them had really bad motion sickness. Or they could gorge on all the greasy and fried foods until they were stuffed sick.

Daichi loved food, adored it, but he knew he wouldn't be ab;e to enjoy the soggy grease smothered fried food on sticks without Ukai yelling at him. The games, though fun, would only cause an argument. For as much as he loved her, sometimes he just wanted to shove her into a pit. Daichi was a bit of a sore loser, and Y/n an even bigger one. Some rides weren't too bad, not all of them were roller coasters that would make them throw everything back up.

"What if we ride the carousel?" Daichi suggested, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side.

"We'd look like idiots." Y/n deadpanned, looking up at Daichi with a serious expression. Daichi rolled his eyes, sighing through his nose.

"Since when have you cared about looking like an idiot?" Daichi shot back. Y/n scoffed, turning her nose upwards.

"Excuse you, but I am a very dignified person!" Y/n retorted. She watched as Daichi laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners, his head tilting back. Did he really think of her that way? She knew he was joking, but she couldn't help but bite the inside of her cheek with worry. Did he think she was an idiot?

-----------------

Y/n laughed wholeheartedly as she hoisted herself onto the metal horse, watching as Daichi situated himself on the horse next to her, sitting straight and tall, mimicking some fake posh pose.

"Madam," Daichi said seriously, pretending to tip his 'hat'. Y/n stifled her laughter, trying her best to curtsy on the horse.

"Good sir," Y/n replied, the grin creeping back up onto her face.

-------------------------

Daichi hummed to himself happily as Y/n pulled him around the park, going from game to ride to food to game. She was buzzing with energy, pretty e/c eyes glimmering in the red, blue, green, and orange light of the park. At this point, they had gone on almost every ride, save for the rollercoasters. The only ride left was the Ferris wheel.

"C'mon!" Y/n tugged at Daichi's hand, pulling him closer to the giant and lit up wheel. They were some of the last people left at the park, and the lines for everything were now a lot shorter. In a matter of minutes, Daichi was sat next to Y/n, the giant frog on the ground next to the operator. Y/n looked up at Daichi, a grin on her face as she leaned into his side.

She felt happy, warm, and safe. She felt it all the time, bubbling in her chest and fluttering in her stomach like butterflies. But she was tired, drained, and depleted. It took everything in her to not fall asleep on Daichi; it took all her energy to smile and giggle. She felt joy; she felt as if she were basking in a clear pool of nostalgia and warmth, but the irritation seemed to find a way into the pool to taint it. She felt nice, so why did she want to scream? Why did she want to cry and curse the world and everyone in it?

You're so stupid, you're going to die, idiot, Y/n thought to herself, sinking further into Daichi's side, her gaze focused on the moon that began to rise. Was it really that late? The ride came to a halt, the carriage that Y/n and Daichi sat in stopping at the very top. Y/n looked over the side, gasping as she surveyed the park, eyes skimming over various stands and lights.

Pretty. It was one of the few ways Daichi could describe the sight. The various colors of lights that bathed the park in shades on blue, green, red, and orange shone like a soft glow off of Y/n's s/c skin, reflecting on her cheeks like little ponds of light. Her eyes were open and round, mouth slightly agape. Pretty.

Y/n turned to look at Daichi, a wonder-filled grin on her face. Daichi smiled, his eyes tender. He leaned forward, one hand cupping her face, his thumb gently stroking the skin beneath it. Y/n relaxed under the touch, leaning into it. They stayed like that for a moment, Daichi stroking her cheek while she sat relaxed and still with closed eyes. And then Daichi was leaning in, pressing a warm and slow kiss to her lips. Y/n could feel the fire prickle underneath her skin, crawling to the tips of her toes and fingers. She could feel a buzz prance on her face, she could hear her blood rushing and heart beating. Daichi's hand dropped to her neck, giving it the lightest squeeze, his palms feeling like silk draped against her neck.

Y/n pulled away, pupils blown and lips parted. She could feel Daichi's eyes studying her entire face, taking in every dip and angle, memorizing every beauty mark like they were constellations in the sky. Before she could steady her breathing, Daichi was dipping his head, pressing his lips to hers once again, gently nipping at her bottom lip before pulling away.

"Is this okay?" Daichi whispered, his eyes closed, lips closer to her jaw now than they were before. Y/n gulped, her gaze flitting down to Daichi before nodding. Daichi stayed still for a minute, relishing in the heat of her skin. Then before he could think, he was peppering kisses along her jaw, gently working his way down to her neck. Y/n gasped, body jolting when Daichi's lips brushed against her neck. Daichi chuckled, brushing the area with the tip of his nose, a smile sneaking onto his lips when he heard a giggle slip past Y/n's lips.

Tenderly, he pressed a kiss to her neck. Nothing more, nothing less. He stayed still, the silent question hanging in the air. May I? He could feel the way her breaths became just the slightest bit sporadic, he could feel every jolt, hear every gasp and giggle. Could he? And then Y/n was holding his hand, giving it a soft squeeze. Daichi pressed one more kiss to the area before giving it a swift nip, quickly pressing his lips to it to soothe the soft nip of pain. Y/n giggled at the sensation, her laughter quickly being drowned by soft gasps as Daichi began to bruise the skin with his lips and teeth. Daichi pulled back, pressing one final kiss to the patch of skin before lifting his head to give Y/n a soft smile.

---------------------------

Daichi had been scrolling through his phone, waiting for Y/n in the truck while she made a quick trip into the convenience store to pick up the meat buns they had bet on. She had insisted on going into the convenience store with her giant plushie, stating that it was because she was in love with it, and not because she wanted to show a friend of hers who just so worked there. It had been well over fifteen minutes before Y/n stepped into the car again, a sour look on her face and the bag with the meat buns in her hand. Daichi didn't even have to ask her what was wrong. As soon as she sat down she was going off about some lady in the store.

"She called me childish! Said I was probably irresponsible and then lectured me! Stupid lady, ruining my night." Y/n grumbled, giving Daichi his meat buns and leaving hers in the bag so she could drive. "You don't think I'm childish and irresponsible, right?" Y/n asked, her eyes focused on the road. Daichi stilled, his face shoved into the savory pork bun. He did not want to answer that. "Daichi?" As much as he loved her, even Daichi could admit she was a bit of a handful sometimes. She managed to get in trouble wherever she went, and there wasn't a day that went by where Daichi wasn't dragging her out of that mess. But Daichi adored it. Even if it meant getting in trouble with the neighbors and his parents. She was his constant reminder that life was meant to be lived.

"I think you can be all those things and more, but it's charming," Daichi responded truthfully, chuckling when Y/n perked up in her seat.

"Thanks, Dai," Y/n murmured, keeping her eyes on the road as to not make eye contact with Daichi.

"Meat bun?" Daichi offered, pulling one of the buns from the plastic bag, unwrapping it, and holding it to her lips.

"I prefer onigiri." Y/n teased, leaning forward to take a quick bite from the bun.

------------------------------------------

Bokuto leaned back on his palms, a soft smile on his face. Daichi sighed, his eyes focused on the hem of his coat. He wondered, what happened to her frog?

"It's comforting to know she was happy those last few months," Kuroo admitted, his hands on his knees. Daichi looked up to see Bokuto and Kuroo gazing out at the sky, eyes focusing on the different clouds that billowed across the cold, grey skies.

"It is, huh..." Daichi agreed, allowing himself to relax and smile. It was nice to think she had been happy. At least for a little bit.

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