#and a devastating loss when she dies but like it wasn’t earned

[ladylightning]

thinking about how much better season 8 would have been if sam’s year of domestic bliss was with sarah blake from s1. sam is spiraling after losing dean, cas, and kevin in one fail swoop and has a chance encounter with old flame sarah blake from a past case. she’s recently separated with a young son. their relationship mirrors deanlisa. sam does not have to hide who he is with sarah because she knows what he does, unlike amelia. sarah ultimately breaks it off to give things another go with her husband like in the original amelia storyline.

the rest of s8 is largely the same, but it makes 8x22 clip show more devastating. crowley is killing the people sam and dean had saved, including sarah. sam is devastated and is determined to finish the trials. the curing of crowley is so much more intense as crowley begs sam for forgiveness for killing sarah. sam is unable to complete the trials because he cannot forgive crowley and be truly purified by the trials.

[lunarmoonanons]

The Small Dragon’s family

🌕 🌖 🌗 🌘 🌑 🌒 🌓 🌔 🌕  

King Jaehaerys and Queen Alyssanne had their youngest daughter, YN, late in life. Born in 84 ac she was the baby for her entire family, and in their eyes she could do no wrong. Age does affect the relationship between siblings and between a parent & child.

🌕 🌖 🌗 🌘 🌑 🌒 🌓 🌔 🌕   

Masterlist 

Jaehaerys

The King was 50 years old when his youngest was born. He had known great loss at this point and his children were all growing. Some becoming too much to handle. He thought that his wife was passed the point of being able to carry children. Gael was a surprise, but YN was a miracle.

At first he was determined not to become too close to this child, due to his age and the apparent curse upon his children; he was frightened at the thought of loving someone just to lose them again.

That all changed when he was presented with his newborn. The babe seemed to already recognize him, and in her eyes he felt as though he was looking at the culmination of all his lost daughters. When he raised his hand to wave the septa holding her away, YN reached for him with a determination to be held. And once in his arms she touched his face and cooed, soothing the king's fears. At this point Jaehaerys was certain this child had the souls of all his lost daughters merged into this perfect little being.

And he would not let anyone hurt her.

Alyssanne

The Good Queen had believed, like her husband, that her childbearing days were now past her. When they lost Daella the two could only hold each other in the bedchamber, as when they were not in embrace they argued about who died. When Alyssa died in childbirth, Alyssanne was already pregnant with YN and had nearly lost her in grief. So when she had given birth to YN, the same thought that Jaehaerys had came to her. Miracle.

It was a long labor Alyssanne didn’t know if she’d make it and was prepared to meet her children in the afterlife. Gael, merely four years old, cried at her side. But YN arrived on the second day of labor, crying out with healthy lungs and red round cheeks. Alyssane’s mature hands reached for her baby, who immediately stopped crying staring into her eyes causing Alyssanne to weep anew in relief. Her baby was fine.

Since she had lost Daella, Alyssa, Gaemon, Valerion, in such quick succession,and having lost three of her children in their babehood, Alyssanne clung to her daughter. The grief over her marriage, her children, her seemingly never ending bad luck causing her to trauma bond with her. She and her youngest daughters became almost inseparable.

They will always be her babies.

Aegon

YN never knew Aegon, he had died long before she was born, but she would be told about him when Alyssanne lamented her fear to her daughter.

Daenerys

YN also did not know Daenerys, but she would constantly ask about her; almost as if she knew her or was connected to her. In the eyes of her father that was the case, in reality YN was a curious girl and wanted to know about her sister that never got to be her sister.

Aemon

Aemon was 29 when his baby sister was born. He was already a father at that point, but still loved his little sister. Often times setting up playdates with her and his daughter who was 10.

He, like his father, believed that his baby sister the merged souls of his lost sisters. Since he was close to Daenerys and Alyssa, Aemon practically saw them in every action that YN did.

The more “obediant” and “cautious” child, he tries to be a good influence and a lateral figure to her. YN earned his love when she crawled to him for the time in her life.

Baelon

Baelon was 27 when YN was born, and had lost his sister-wife a few months beforehand. Having been utterly devastated by the loss of his lover, and trying to care for a sickly baby, he was distracted from his baby sister at first.

In truth it wasn’t until YN’s first nameday, a few months after his newborn had died, did Baelon even meet his baby sister. Like Alyssanne he hyper fixated on the baby, but unlike his mother he didn’t just look at her and fall in love. It wasn’t until YN had started to cuddle up to him, and in her own baby ways tried to comfort him in his grief

He didn’t know if he believed that she was part of his dearly departed Alyssa’s soul, but he did know she was trying to comfort him in his grief. Eventually she would pull him out and he would be that boisterous, adventurous man people loved. He would initiate playdates with her and his children, and YN would get along well with Daemon.

Alyssa

Alyssa only ever knew YN as her future sibling. She would speak to her in the womb when she’d visit her mother, and promised to take her dragon riding and hunting and all the things she did as a child.

Though Alyssa passed when YN was in the womb, YN would say she already knew her. That she knew her through Baelon and that she was certain Alyssa would’ve been a great big sister to her. Sometimes YN dreams of the promises that were told to her in the womb

Maegelle

Maegelle had already been promised and a part of the Faith of the Seven by the time YN was born. The 22 year old had been there for her mother when she had given birth and proclaimed YN’s health and somehow “connection” to her deceased sisters were a blessing of the Mother and the Stranger. She in fact was the one to proclaim her as a miracle.

She would be a bit overbearing with trying to get YN to be completely devoted to the Faith, this would sometimes cause YN to push her away. But Maegelle adores her baby sister, probably more than her other sisters and believes she is a gift from the gods to ease their mother’s pain, as she like others believes Gael to be dim witted.

Overbearing but still loving, like that hyper religious family member

Vaegon

Like his sister Maegelle, Vaegon was already a part of an institution when YN was born. He did come for her birth, knowing how many people referred to him as cold, unpleasant, sour, or just not liked. Some others said his serious face would scare the babe. But he was a Maester, an important job! He never intended to seem cruel, he just took pride in his work.

Vaegon did not meet YN till she was 4, a little after Viserra died. He tried to avoid her, so as to not make her cry, but she sought him out. Climbing her way into his lap when he sat, and staring into his pale face. He was going to put her down when she did what none of his siblings, or any child, ever did. She reached up, touched his cold cheek. And smiled. A sweet pure giggle and a hug granted her his undying love.

She would always have the best care a Maester could give. He would ensure that.

Daella

Like Daenerys and Alyssa, YN never knew Daella. But YN’s kind nature as a child convinced many she was her sister either reborn or was guided by her spirit.

YN had told Jaehaerys once, when he was crying about the memory of Daella and how he shouldn’t have made her marry, that Daella wouldn’t blame him. That she was certain Daella still loved him and would want him happy.

Once again, confirming his being she had part of Daella’s soul in her.

Saera

Saera only knew YN a few months before she was sent to the citadel for “being a whore” (Jaehaerys you misogynistic cu-), but she loved her little sister.

In her words: YN had never judged her or looked at her as a shameful thing. Though Jaehaerys did try to keep them apart, believing that Saera would corrupt her, Saera always found a way to sneak into YN’s nursery and cuddle her.

When Saera was sent to the citadel, it was said YN cried for hours and could not be consoled, she would screech and kick in her father’s arms. This instance was repeated when Saera ran away to Essos in 85 ac. Breaking the older girl’s heart in the process as she could feel the pain of her baby sister.

Viserra

Despite the fact Viserra was 13 when YN was born, she had a close connection to her sister. Though they couldn’t communicate much due to the age difference, Viserra delighted in dressing her up like a doll and saying one day they’d both be the most beautiful women in Westeros. Though Viserra would be the prettier.

She believed she and YN were the closest, because Gael was dimwitted (the bios are so mean to that little girl) and Their other siblings were too old to get close.

Priding herself on being the “closest” to their baby sister, Viserra rubbed it in Baelon’s face as revenge for him refuting her.

Gaemon

YN never knew her brother Gaemon, whenever she asked about him she was only told he died. His death impacted how afraid Alyssanne was to lose this YN at birth.

Valerion

Just like Gaemon, his death shook Alyssanne to her core. Leaving her in fear for YN’s life at infancy due to her age when she gave birth

Gael

Gael was worried and a bit miffed when she heard mommy was going to have another baby, thinking mommy would just push her away because everyone thought she was dim. She infact could understand more than what others knew.

When YN was born, Gael loved her quite a bit. Though Viserra would tease that she was YN’s favorite, Gael was closer due to their age. They loved playing together and spending time with each other. Gael could understand YN better than the others because as children they could communicate in a way that only children could understand.

Eternal playmates.

In conclusion, everyone is either trauma bonding or projecting their needs and insecurities on poor baby YN. This family needs a goddamn grief counselor and a therapist.

Taglist:

@missglaskin​ 

[padfootastic]

I feel like I'm gonna combust.

James dies in fifth year.

What do his parents do? His father works in the DMLE and I have no idea if his mother has a job (can you tell me?). What is their course of action?

Are they going to sue the school for the loss of James or Snape personally? I feel like they have a pretty solid argument for sacking (punishing) dumbledore or sending Snape to Azkaban.

And I that which ever they choose, the would get easily.

Or do they have a big enough heart to forgive Snape, and Dumbledore? Ik Albus hasn't done much wrong, but if a dark curse has been made and used (killing a pureblood- even if it is a blood traitor), dumbledore will be blamed, or could be, right? And they (Potters) would have enough money and power to get their compensation, in whichever way they take it, wouldn't they?

I wonder about Sirius too, but I these are some, that, as far as I know, haven't been asked and it's intresting side for me. Like we know Sirius and lots quality from head to toe but all we know about his parents are that the are old, rich and loving. And that they have a big heart.

hello hello hello! can i just say,,,i love ur questions bc literally the same things go thru my mind lol it’s why i spend so long on worldbuilding (often the unnecessary kind too lol)

let’s take this one by one:

1. i…don’t know of flea was in the DMLE actually? 🤔 wasn’t he a potioneer? and no, i don’t think we have anything for effie but idk why, i like to think she’s a socialite with like. an enchanting business on the side? (v random ik lol but it’s fun) i’m also gonna plead the fifth on this one since i…might include it in the fic and i’ve got a few options i wanna go with there (depending on how i do the macro characterisation for the —are they ruthless, forgiving, more upset than angry etc etc)

2. definitely think they’ll take action against the school, tho, regardless of however they choose to deal w snape personally! they’re def the type to hold authorities responsible for their actions (and lack of) and i do think they’ll push for some outcome pretty hard. idk about getting dumbledore sacked bc,,,if he’s the only one who can keep the school safe during voldy’s rise… not sure that’ll happen.

3. i do err on the side of wealthy potters so i think they’ll have enough money for whichever route they take. i tend to think of them as like…new money types who’ve earned through inventing and travelling? so they earn a lot, and spend on fun things, and it’s a constant cycle. but they don’t have the kind of…historical prestige that the ‘old families’ do tho they enjoy a nice enough reputation.

i haven’t said a lot here, but i do think that a part of them will be diverted towards taking care of sirius as well, because i firmly believe they considered him a second son and they can see how much it’s affecting them and fhey’re the only other ones who get it, right, how devastating the loss of james potter can be. that being said, i find it very, very possible that they’ might ‘die of a broken heart’ and i don’t say that all that lightly. from what we get: james is a surprise child after years of trying to elderly parents. he enjoys a level of pampering and spoiling and unconditional adoration that’s far above the normal avg amount a child gets, imo, and i think after he was born, his parents poured everything of themselves into him. james was effie and flea’s entire world, and they never hesitated in showing it. i totally see them as the kind of overprotective, almost helicopter, parents who panic when their child gets even a scratch on their body—so for him to die? for them to bury their child they wished for so strongly and celebrated as much as they were able to? it’s the definition of heartbreaking. it’s so, so painful, and neither of them would be able to get out of the bed for days or even keep so much as a piece of toast down or do anything, really, for a while.

when they find out the news, effie lets out the most gut wrenching, grief-filled scream, falling to her knees. flea tries to hold onto her but he’s even weaker and both of them just. sink to the ground over their baby boy’s body. not one person had a dry eye around them. no one has seen such a level of shame on dumbledore or mcgonagall’s face before. it might be the first time snape realises the *magnitude* of his actions.

[divineblccd]

CHARACTER NAME/ALIAS: Cassie Sandsmark aka Wonder Girl FACECLAIM: Sabrina Carpenter  AFFILIATIONS: Teen Titans, Young Justice, the Nomads AGE: 21 SPECIES: Demi-God

IS YOUR CHARACTER’S IDENTITY SECRET OR PUBLIC? Public  POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Flight, Superhuman Abilities, Electrokinesis (ish)  WEAKNESSES: Several of her powers/weapons are linked to controlling her emotions, and Cassie is…not great at this. She’s weaker against projectile weapons like arrows and bullets than she is against blunt force.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT? No. Again, Diana heavily influenced her decision, but after Cassie saw how the ISA treated metas, she knew it was the right decision. However, she does occasionally spiral in self-doubt and wonders if she’s too dangerous to go unmonitored 

CHARACTER BIO —

Cassie grew up like a lot of kids in Gateway City: idolizing Wonder Woman and getting into trouble to pass the time. She never really knew where it came from, but there had always been an itch underneath her skin that seemed impossible to satiate, no matter how many fights she got into. Cassie bounced around from school to school, never staying long enough to make friends. The only constant in her life was her mother and her Museum. She could only play on her Gameboy for so long while waiting for her mom to finish her work at the Gateway City Museum of Antiquities. What was a restless girl to do when she was surrounded by ancient artifacts and weapons but ignore all the ‘do not touch’ signs? It helped when Diana showed up. Superhuman patience appeared to be one of Wonder Woman’s many powers because she put up with Cassie’s endless chatter and demands for attention. All Cassie wanted was to be like Diana, to be like Donna, to be a hero. She practiced with swords she wasn’t supposed to touch and watched tape after tape of Wonder Girl’s appearances in the news. So, when Zeus asked her what she wanted in exchange for helping Wonder Woman take down Doomsday and Decay, she didn’t have to think about her answer. A hero. She wanted to be a hero.

Zeus granted her wish. He gave her superpowers, similar to Diana’s, and after convincing her very reluctant mother, she trained with Artemis to become worthy of her gift. Cassie eventually earned the Wonder Girl mantle with Donna’s blessing and retired costume. Sometimes, she had to pinch herself to believe it. As Wonder Girl, Cassie joined Young Justice and grew close to Cissie, Anita, and Tim. She finally had friends her own age, and she was living her ultimate dream–but like most things in Cassie’s life, it didn’t last long. After Donna was killed, Cassie was devastated and the team was disbanded. It was her first time experiencing true loss. Her father, so she was told, died before she was born. The grief had been mostly second-hand, a dull longing for someone she made up in her head. Donna’s death was sharp and jagged in all the worst ways. The pain awakened something inside of her, something that she liked to pretend didn’t exist.

Eventually, Cassie couldn’t ignore it. She joined Teen Titans and later learned that her father was Zeus. She had been lied to by the people she trusted the most; she could feel the rage that had always been simmering beneath the surface erupt. Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately), Ares gave Cassie her own mythical lasso, but instead of truth, her lasso expelled lightning fueled by wrath. Her superhuman abilities, on the other hand, were weakening with no apparent reason. Being Wonder Girl was all Cassie had ever wanted, so when Ares told her that Zeus was the reason her powers were disappearing, she made a deal with the devil. In exchange for Ares’s powers, Cassie would become his champion. After the proverbial ink dried, her powers became completely entwined with her anger. It was overwhelming, all-consuming, and she felt like she might burn to death from the inside out. After Kon died, she almost did.

Cassie’s powers became unmanageable. It was easy, almost natural, to give into the rage. Ares was the God of War, after all, and she was supposed to be his champion. She realized that she was becoming the very thing she sought to destroy, but it was too late. Her nephew Lycus, the son of Ares, took advantage of her instability and attacked her in order to claim the title of Ares’s avatar and her powers. He was able to take the powers that Ares gave her, but through a nearly fatal battle Cassie discovered that she no longer needed to use powers from other gods. She had divine power flowing through her blood. She defeated Lycus with a level of super-strength that she had never possessed before.

She used her new powers to lead the Teen Titans, and now she hopes that she can do something to prove to herself that she’s worthy of being called a hero. 

[white-collar-lawmen-and-conmen]

Cross the Ocean

A/N: Requested by @starry--skies​. Sidenote: this may be a good story for a sequel sometime.

Summary: Neal once told you he would cross the ocean to be with you, but when you know he’s in danger, you’ll cross the ocean yourself to save him.

Word Count: 2,955

           How could an apartment feel so cold and empty when the same number of people dwelled in its walls? You supposed it had been long enough that all the signs of him had faded. Spare clothes, returned to June, because there was no one else to return them to; the extra toothbrush trashed because no one was using it, anyway, and why have it take up more space? The linens could only go unwashed for so long, the last flowers he had offered died months ago, and his necklace was sitting in your jewelry box, unseen, because it hurt too much to wear it.

           The same number of people lived in it, true. But Neal hadn’t needed to live there to leave his mark, and now that mark was gone, jumped on a plane without a goodbye, just like him.

~~~ Cross the Ocean ~~~

           “Don’t go,” you said, unprompted, staring across the room to the dark shadows covering the wall.

           You could feel his movement as Neal picked up his head. “Where would I go?” He asked, confused, sleepiness adorably muddling his voice.

           You shrugged halfheartedly, already regretting having said it out loud. He felt your shoulders under his arm and tightened his warm hold on you, tugging you closer to the heat of his chest.

           “Just don’t go,” you said again, hugging yourself comfortingly.

           The idea that the man beside you could leave – had a history of leaving – without a trace left you feeling cold already. You were a cautious person, but loving someone the way you suspected you were growing to love Neal made you want to let down your guard. It was scary, like taking off the Kevlar vest to assuage someone with a gun; you were reasonably certain that you were safe, but you were also making yourself vulnerable to massive injury.

           Neal moved his hand slowly, probably just so you would know that he hadn’t fallen asleep. He didn’t answer right away. The silence and the stroking of your arm sent mixed messages and you had just about settled on reading it as pity, and almost curled up tighter and moved away. Did he think you were clingy? Did he think it was pitiful that you expected him to stay with you? Maybe you had misread everything.

           His hand stopped moving and he moved again, just enough to press his lips to your forehead. “Y/N,” he said, softly, his voice clearer. Thinking on it had woken him up more. “I don’t plan to go anywhere. Definitely not anywhere you can’t follow.”

           Whew. There was a softness and delicateness to the way he talked to you, but it sure didn’t sound like pity or exasperation. More like… empathy, and maybe apology, for your evident insecurity and any role that his past played in it.

           “I guess I just – I keep thinking one day I’ll wake up and you’ll be an ocean away.” Without me, you wanted to add, but figured it was implied. And unnecessary, probably, since he had done it to Kate before, or close enough. He had likely learned the kind of damage that did to a relationship.

           Neal resumed his gentle stroking of your arm. “Oceans aren’t a big deal. We’ve got cruises and airplanes now,” he reassured with a playful bit of teasing. More seriously, but very simply and matter-of-factly, he continued, “And if someday we wake up an ocean apart, I’d cross the ocean.”

~~~ Cross the Ocean ~~~

           It was easy to be bitter and easy to resent. In the beginning, you had been insecure, nervous that he would leave overnight when an opportunity arose. How could you not? Neal tried to leave forever without so much as a goodbye to anyone, only stopped by a bomb and a lost love. It had irked you then, and it scared you when your rapport deepened. He had fake documents ready to go, an agreed-upon rendezvous point with Mozzie planned for any given time. Neal worked hard to assure you he loved you. You weren’t sure he ever managed to convince you there was no chance of his leaving, but you at least had confidence that he would say goodbye, give you a chance to have closure.

           No such luck. Part of you knew it wasn’t out of lack of desire, but rather lack of opportunity. The other part wanted it to shut up. Love him as you did, you knew Neal’s situation was a product of his own choices. He made his bed, and he should have lied in it, but for the family he had found in the city who loved him too much to let him rot in the pocket of a man who’d use him as a tool and throw him back in prison the second he stopped being useful – or, worse, leave him to die when it became too much trouble.

           Whenever you embraced the anger, because the sorrow was too overwhelming, you resented Neal for all his stupid choices. Keeping the painting, pulling those stunts on the aerial tramway, and baiting Kramer for months with constant near-misses that could’ve been avoided if he had just stopped breaking the law. It was such a simple solution. And you were angry. The last six months of your relationship had been rocky, because the anger wasn’t new, it wasn’t just because he had gone away. It was because he kept compromising himself, and his coworkers and friends by extension, and yourself by association.

           Holding onto anger was never your forte when it came to Neal, though. Sooner or later, usually within a couple of days, you would see or hear or do something that would remind you of the man, and you’d be hit with a wall of all the good memories, all the things he did that made you feel pride and adoration and contentment. Then came the longing and loss, and finally, the blame. The blame that you had just failed to pin on Neal himself, so you embraced the bitterness instead.

           Peter had one job and instead, he turned Neal loose. Gave him the green light to run. At least if Neal had gone with Kramer, there was the chance of a happy ending. There was a reasonable chance that, with the WCCD at his back, Kramer wouldn’t be able to keep Neal past the two years left on his original sentence, and when it was over he could have come home. Peter had ruined any chance of that, his silent gesture telling Neal that there was no alternative and that he had the approval of his family here. Most importantly, that nod was a goodbye, and acceptance, and an “I love you, so I’m letting you be free”. You’d never begrudged Neal his close relationship with Peter but you felt cheated that, on top of ruining any slight chance of your partner returning to you, he got to say goodbye while you were left blindsided and heartbroken.

           The first time you resorted to bitterness to cope, it lasted several weeks. You avoided Peter and dodged his team. They were worried, and El reached out, but you politely assured her you were fine and just didn’t want to see any of them. She respected your wishes and must have told her husband because he, Diana, and Clinton all stopped trying to find you. Neal’s friends were like salt in your wounds, even the ones who hadn’t told him to go. It was too deep and too fresh to handle the reminders. Hell, you could still barely handle your own apartment. You really didn’t know how deeply in love you were until Neal was gone.

           It took longer, but the bitterness and betrayal ran its course and became exhausting, as well. Finally, you cycled back into sadness and mourning, which took so much out of you but demanded so little. Roses made you cry because you thought of the roses Neal would give you. So did your favorite dress, which was only your favorite because it was his favorite, too. Tiny things that you could expect to encounter at least once every few days would make you feel hopeless. You were grieving, as if he had died. Knowing he was alive and well didn’t soothe the pain because the permanence of his decision to flee the authorities put him so out of your reach, he might as well have died.

           Every run through the stages hurt a little bit less, wound up a little bit shorter. You were healing, you knew, but the ache in your heart persisted. Learning to function again, learning to be prosperous and content without him, was an option, no matter how impossible it seemed on some days. On those days, you weren’t sure you even wanted to. Neal had earned such a place in your life and in your heart, and even when the things he did made you see red, you still knew in both heart and mind that he loved you and was yours. Some little piece of you wanted to still be his, so that you could keep that connection, that last thing you had of him.

           That little piece was such an asshole.

~~~ Cross the Ocean ~~~

           A deep delve into your professional life helped keep you occupied so you didn’t think too hard. It wasn’t the healthiest way of processing a breakup, no matter how messy or devastating said breakup was. Still, it was better to be productive and helpful than to let yourself continue spiraling and cycling through destructive emotions and patterns. The summer passed agonizingly slowly but when you looked back, it was like the blink of an eye. Suddenly it had been a whole season since you had last seen Neal. The romantic side of you wanted to say that it hurt just as much as it had before, but… it didn’t.

           You felt awful thinking it, and then awful for feeling awful for having a life after him. Neal was gone. He had no choice about leaving New York, but he did have a choice about how, and he chose the route that left no possibility of a reunion. Why the hell should you wait around for him, wishing you kept hurting for a man who clearly was more interested in his freedom than in recovering what you had together?

           Going home the day you had that thought, you looked at the button for the 21st floor and for the first time in a long time, you actually thought about just poking your head in and seeing how Neal’s other friends were doing, and then you realized the anger was running out. You didn’t have the energy or the will to keep deliberately resenting Neal or Peter.

~~~ Cross the Ocean ~~~

           By August, you could look back on everything and understand the decisions that were made. You didn’t agree with them, but you understood the desperation fueling them and the fear that Neal must have felt. The moment Neal’s handler, whoever that was, tied his hands and threw him aside, the man was as good as dead, just in a matter of time. Kramer wasn’t above that. If he were free – even just by flight – Neal could protect himself. You could forgive him for leaving, but you weren’t sure he was forgiven for leaving without even a phone call to you as he booked it to the airport.

           Later that month, though, your personal grievances didn’t seem to matter all that much. A man approached you while you were at work. You thought he was the man you’d asked to come answer some questions, but no – you were the one being questioned. He was cynical, evasive, and exacting, and clearly after information on Neal.

           As soon as he left, you went to the twenty-first floor and beelined for Peter’s office, ignoring the tentative, sympathetic greetings from familiar faces. Peter glanced up when you entered and then did a shocked double-take. It was the first time you had voluntarily approached him in months, after all.

           Peter stood up so quickly his chair legs scraped loudly on the floor. “Y/N,” he said right away, but then obviously had no idea where he was trying to go, unable to figure out what to say. You could see the sympathy and sorrow on his face. Not only did you lose your partner, and Peter had lost his friend, but the other agent had encouraged your partner to leave. He knew from your avoidance that you blamed him, at least partially.

           With a wave of your hand, you dismissed it. Nothing Peter could say would fix the situation. You knew what he had done was in Neal’s best interests, weighing his wellbeing over your feelings. Where Neal wasn’t forgiven, Peter was, finally, and the avoidance that remained was just about trying to distance yourself from reminders of your blue-eyed artist.

           “Someone just came asking questions about Neal,” you said, crossing your arms and peering across the office at Peter. “Agent Collins. He said he’s just tying up loose ends, but he’s not, is he?”

           Peter’s openmouthed surprise turned into a grim purse of his lips. He shook his head, looking frustrated, and gestured for you to close the door. You did, and leaned back against it. “He’s the bureau’s version of a bounty hunter,” the agent confided, putting his fists down on his desk and leaning onto it. “Neal was almost commutated, then slipped out under their noses. It makes them look bad. They want to get him back.”

           You didn’t miss that Peter was using pronouns that excluded himself, but didn’t comment. It was no surprise – he’d made his stance clear when he encouraged Neal to go. “Why now?” You demanded. “It’s been months, surely the trail’s cold.”

           “Best guess?” Peter hazarded, sighing deeply. “They’ve spent this time trying to find him other ways. Now they’re realizing that Neal’s better than they thought and all they want to do is make an example out of him.”

           Oh, hell no. “Like they haven’t already?” You asked snidely. Peter tilted his head aside, not explicitly agreeing but getting his point across all the same.

           The bureau had your trust – for the most part. When it came to their treatment of Neal, your eyes had been opened to how even organizations seeking justice could be completely unjust in their treatment of people who lacked recourse. Neal was frequently put in life-threatening situations with no training and no choice in the matter except to be put back in prison. Enough people knew Neal was working with the FBI for Sing Sing to be a life-threatening situation, in and of itself. Neal was nothing but a tool to them because he lacked the normal resources of walking away or pursuing litigation.

           You looked aside, glowering at the drab office wall. “It gets worse,” Peter wearily told you. “Collins is looking for a win. And at this point, a dead fugitive is just as good of an example as an incarcerated one.”

           “Not happening,” you refused furiously. “What the hell happened to proportionality?” Neal may have pissed some people off, Robin Hood-ing from the one percent, but he was never violent. Sending a bounty hunter after him with permission to kill was wildly inappropriate and inhumane.

           “I’m afraid proportionality isn’t the first thing on the mind,” Peter warned as you stalked further into his office, toward his desk.

           “We have to warn him,” you mumbled, more to yourself than to Peter. Neal was “run at any time” paranoid, not “stay away from windows” paranoid.

           “Yes,” Peter nodded, “But we can’t. We don’t know where he is. There is no way of telling him.” The agent wasn’t giving up or resigning himself to being useless. As much as there was disappointment and worry in his face, there was also stubbornness.

           “So we find him,” you quietly suggested. “No one knows him better than we do.”

           “Y/N.” Peter dropped his voice to match your volume and spoke with a soft, concerned tone. “You have to understand, finding Neal and not turning him in, much less tipping him off about Collins, is outside the law.”

           “The law is apparently saying it’s okay to murder a man who has, at worst, taken money that isn’t his.” You fervently stated. That wasn’t your first concern, Neal was, but you needed Peter to know that you weren’t just in this because you were in love with the man in question. There was a principle at stake, and a moral obligation. “The equivalent of chopping off a pickpocket’s hand, coming from the government that supposedly despises cruelty and injustice. I won’t support that, and I sure as hell won’t stand by and let it be done to someone I love.”

           While you had been talking, Peter had slowly started to smile. It was the smile he used to always give to Neal when he was proud, when your boyfriend would remind him that Neal was a kind person with a good, loving soul. Having it directed at you reminded you far too much of the smile Neal always gave back and your chest tightened – not just at the memory, but at the decision which meant you were bound to see it again.

           “I knew you were going to say that,” Peter admitted with a small, relieved grin, like the shared challenge and conspiracy were washing all the sourness and distance under the bridge. You really thought that maybe it was. His confidence in you and his commitment to your boyfriend reassured you that you weren’t losing your mind and you weren’t alone, no matter how lonely you’d been feeling. “I just need you to understand what you’re putting at stake.”

           “Wherever he is, when we find him, I’m coming. No matter what.”

[warwaged-moved]

Ranger Captain Alleria Windrunner Renowned Troll Hunter of Quel'Thalas. Lead Scout and Intelligence Agent for the Alliance Expedition that marched into the orc homeworld of Draenor. Presumed deceased. Your heart flew straight as any arrow upon the wind, sister. You were the brightest of our Order. You were the most beloved of our kin.- Sylvanas Windrunner - Ranger General of Quel'Thalas

Alleria hates being regarded as the legendary heroic figure she has come to be. When she left to Draenor, of course part of her reasoning was to protect those she loved and keep her world safe, but it was also not to return. When she went through the portal, Alleria did so believing it (wanting it) to be a one way trip, in which she would, yes, protect things she loved, but also take down as many orcs as possible before she herself found her end in battle. She went there for revenge. She went there meaning to die. That changed when she was there, of course, but the people who hail her as a hero don’t even know that. They idolize her for actions and decisions from the darkest part of her life, the moment she was literally hopeless, the moment when she was completely volatile and purposefully endangered herself all the time because she didn’t know how to live with her grief and guilt. Her statue in the Valley of Heroes is the epitome of people putting her (and more specifically that version of her) in a pedestal she is certain she did nothing to earn. And when she gets past the initial aversion she feels towards that statue, the most Alleria can see in it is a monument to her death — to a version of herself that indeed died, for who she is now isn’t by any means the same Alleria the Alliance saw fit to carve in stone.

Regardless, she hates the statue --  but when it comes to the plaque, her feelings are quite different. What is written there starts ordinarily enough, identifying her and her deeds — but the last line is different. The last line is not simply empty flattery of people who didn’t know her and had no idea of the state of devastation she was in when she was presumed dead. It isn’t just pretty words written by someone she doesn’t know, or even someone that knew her only as a warrior or a Farstrider. It isn’t merely honoring a deceased hero. Sure, that last line accomplishes that. It honors her as a hero, as a warrior and a Farstrider, it mourns her death. But it is personal. And the first phrase is what frames it like that.

“Your heart flew straight as any arrow upon the wind, sister.“ Even if the ‘sister’ wasn’t there, this is someone speaking of her heart; of who she was. It is someone who knew Alleria, who knew she did what she wanted with the certainty of a well aimed arrow, who knew her to be determined and deadly and not held back by anyone or anything.

Reading it the first time, this would be the line that would affect her in a way nothing about the statue did because it would actually reach her feelings. This is her sister speaking of her… and Alleria would know immediately which sister it was, too, which in itself would make her heart ache immensely.

"You were the brightest of our Order. You were the most beloved of our kin.” From anyone else, Alleria might have deemed it empty praise. But those two sentences combined with the previous one, there is no way she feels it is untrue — what she would feel is that this was, in a polished way that befit both the honoring of a hero and the station of the one who wrote the words, the honest speech of a sister who truly mourned her when she wrote that. It would fill Alleria with sorrow and regret, to imagine what her supposed death meant to Sylvanas, with all the losses their family had already suffered and everything she had to carry upon her shoulders. It would make her guilty for her choice to leave (for her inability to deal with her own feelings) all over again.

And it would be a knife being further twisted because she was in Stormwind before she actually met Sylvanas again. All Alleria has of her at this point is memories and the warning of what she’s become (and what she became and what led her to become this are both sensitive topics as well, because Alleria will always wonder if her staying could have made a difference in saving Sylvanas). So at once she’s left to deal with the sorrow and guilt and regret from what she caused her sister to go through and the knowledge the Sylvanas who wrote those words is no longer the Sylvanas she will meet when they finally see each other again. If the statue is a monument to an Alleria that no longer is, the words on the plaque were written by a Sylvanas who is just as much gone. Later, she would think it suitable.

[i-drink-and-i-write-fics]

Omega

Chapter 7: Earning Trust

Summary: Reader spends more and more time with Everett, much to Tony’s dismay.

“There is no way that actually happened!”

“I have the video! Jarvis was so kind as to download it to my phone during one of my visits to Tony’s home in Malibu before it was blown up. I had never laughed so hard in my life!” You couldn’t stop chuckling at the memory.

Everett stopped walking to face you. “Are you saying the great Tony Stark, Mr Iron Man himself, once flew face first into a concrete wall?!”

“Swear by all the gods! Though I will admit it was before he even had finished building MARK 2, so in his defense he still wasn’t used to flying.” You took a bite of your ice cream and kept walking.

“I got to admit, I would love to see that.” He fell back into step with you and took your free hand. “And who’s Jarvis? I thought his A.I. was FRIDAY?”

“One day I’ll have to pull it up for you. I have a lot of his test footage. Like how DUM-E kept blasting him with the fire extinguisher even when he wasn’t on fire. And Jarvis was his A.I., until his programming was uploaded into Vision.”

“Ah, ok. But wait, isn’t DUM-E the robot in your greenhouse?”

“Yeah, Tony’s way of putting him in time-out. DUM-E dropped one too many of Bruce’s beakers. I use him to move bags of fertilizer around, which he can mostly do without dropping them.”

You continued to walk around the city as you told Everett more stories about Iron Man’s early days. For the past four months the two of you had managed to find ways to spend time together between his crazy CIA job and you now being an Avenger. Everett still didn’t know your secret and you had no idea how to break it to him.

“So what was it like living with Howard Stark?”

You frowned at this question. It always popped up once people found out who you were, but it never got easier to answer. “The man was not warm or affectionate at all. I’m still really baffled that Maria even married him.”

“Wasn’t he your blood uncle?” Concern was etched in Everett’s face and he wondered if he had opened up a can of worms.

“Yeah, but…. have you ever wondered why he never mentioned his sister? His extended family? It’s because my mom…. was a mutant.”

Everett’s eyes went wide at this. “A mutant?”

“Yeah. Not a high level one or anything. She could control animals. We had the most well behaved pets on the block, or at least that’s what Tony told me. But Howard hated it. The X-Gene is passed through the father and he despised the idea his father having dormant abilities.” You were so close to saying the words, but they remained stuck in your throat.

“And your father?”

“Just your everyday typical human. But he loved mom with all his heart, that I do remember.” You threw away the wrapper of your treat, but wouldn’t turn back to face Everett. “Sometimes I wonder if he would still be alive if he never married her.”

“What?! Why?”

“They were leaving on vacation when they were killed by the Brotherhood. It… it was eerily similar to how Howard and Marie died, except the product the Brotherhood wanted was my mom.” You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, “and I was with them when it happened. I was going to be dropped off with Howard and Maria while they were gone. The only reason I’m not dead as well is because the X-Men happened to be hunting the Brotherhood down at the time. It was Jean and Storm – er, Ororo, who saved me. Two of the three omegas Secretary Ross is trying to monitor in the X Mansion.”

“Were you scared?”

You opened your eyes and looked into his. “Oddly enough, I wasn’t. Of course I was devastated at the loss of my parents, but I could see that the X-Men just wanted to protect me. And as for the Brotherhood, I never saw any of them so there was nothing to be afraid of at the time.”

Everett pulled you close and put a hand on your cheek. You leaned into the touch and smiled softly. As you had gotten to know Everett, you had discovered this other side to him. Before you had only seen the agent: the man dedicated to his bureau and who wanted to do what was right for his country. He was sarcastic and wasn’t easily impressed by the super heros you saw daily. There had been an edge to him, no doubt built from years of not being able to easily trust people due to his career choice. Being a mutant that had been hidden you’re whole life, you completely understood the lack of readily available trust.

But over the past four months, between stolen moments in the compound and the covert nights out on the town, you had slowly chipped away at each other’s walls. Everett had a sweeter side to him, a side that genuinely cared for his country and the welfare of the agents in his charge. He was funny beyond the sarcasm and was even a gentleman, which threw you for a loop. You had never had a guy try in any way to be a gentleman or romantic around you, so at first you were a bit awkward when he held the door for you or presented a single flower to you. It didn’t take long, though, for the two of you to fall into a pattern of trust and comfort.

“____, you are a remarkable woman. You were 5 years old when you were caught in the middle of a mutant battle and you weren’t even scared. I don’t know many full grown adults that would have kept their cool.” He took another step closer to you. “I know you have to head back soon so you won’t turn into a pumpkin, but I’ve really enjoyed these nights out.”

You laughed at the Cinderella joke. “Yeah, can’t have Tony know I’ve been flirty with the enemy. I’ve really enjoyed these nights out as well and hopefully, once Secretary Stick-Up-His-Ass calms down, we can do this more openly.”

“He’s really not that bad, he just needs to realize he can’t control everything.”

You wrapped your right hand around his wrist as he continued to cradle your face, slowly stroking the back of his hand with your thumb. “That’s an understatement.”

He chuckled, “why are we talking about my boss?”

“Good question.” You both leaned in to close the gap for your first kiss together. It was sweet, but barely lasted a few seconds before your phone started blowing up. “I’m going to murder my cousin.”

“Just ignore him,” he mumbled against your lips.

You were planning to do just that, until your watch - programmed with FRIDAY - began to go off.

“Dr ____,” FRIDAY began, “Mr Stark requires your attention.”

You let out an exasperated sigh and frown down at the watch. “Isn’t that Pepper’s job?”

Tony’s voice came out next. “This isn’t some Targaryen-esque request! Where are you?!”

“First of all: ew. You really need to stop making jokes about Coulson’s misunderstanding. Second of all: out. It’s my night off!”

“From?”

“You.” Everett pressed his lips together to keep from laughing. “I’ll be back soon enough.”

“But that’s not soon enough!” You rolled your eyes.

“Stark, you big baby, what’s so important it can’t wait?”

“Cap and I were going to watch some movies and we wanted you to join us.”

You squinted at the watch. You had a pretty good idea what Tony was up to, so you called his bluff. “Well get started, I’ll be there in 30. And get the rest of the crew. We did miss team night last night thanks to you.”

“Hey, it was my anniversary!”

“Glad you at least remembered this time without FRIDAY’s help. I’ll text the others and I will be home soon.”

There was silence on his end and you knew you had trapped him. Clearly he had planned to ‘disappear’ after the first movie so you would have been alone with Steve. If you couldn’t go public about Everett yet, you at least had to find a way to let Steve down gently.

“Tony?”

“Uh yeah, sure. I’ll find Bruce, also.”

“Alright, bye.” You smirked down at the watch and then spoke to the AI. “FRIDAY, text the Avengers and tell them team night is being held in the media room. And send one to Hawkeye saying this is what he misses out on by not living with us.”

Shortly after, your watch pinged and there was a voice message from Clint.

“Very funny, ____. But no way in hell I’m making my family live in that zoo. I’ll catch you guys on the next one.”

You turned back to Everett. “I guess I better get going or my cousin will keep calling and crying.”

“What was that whole squinting and smirking at your watch about?”

“Mainly because Tony can’t see my face so I can plot without worrying about my expressions.”

“Plot for what?”

“More like plot against what. Tony has been trying for the past year - well, since we fixed that whole snapture thing, really, so a year and a half?” You shook your head. “Anyway, he’s been trying to fix me up with Steve and becoming less and less subtle about it.”

“Oh,” he was quiet as he reflected on that. “You know…” he cleared his throat, “if you prefer Captain America, I would completely understand.”

You raised an eyebrow at him. “Prefer Steve over you? If I had that preference, would I be here tonight? If anything, I know for a fact I wouldn’t have kissed you.”

He shook his head and smiled shyly. “I’m sorry, I guess I’m just having a hard time picturing someone choosing me over Rogers.”

You smiled at him and put your arms around his neck. “When I first met Cap, I had already been at the compound for two years. I got there right after that whole fiasco with the Accords. And as a result of the team fighting, I had absolutely no romantic feelings towards Steve and that hasn’t changed. Now I really should get going before my cousin has a heart attack.”

“Alright, but let me walk you to your car.” Once there, you shared a longer kiss goodnight before you headed back to the compound.

Chapter 8

[idk-my-aesthetic]

Phoenix Prince /// Dragon Princess AU

Aka a healthy (ish) fire siblings au (thats still super angsty im so sorry) where Zuko and Azula love/take care of eachother and earn the love of their people

———————————

Ursa dies in child birth, though thankfully Azula survives. Zuko’s only three at the time but he’s devastated by the loss of his mother, and vows to protect his baby sister at all costs

He’s super super involved with Azula growing up, and does everything in his power to protect her from Ozai. Bc when she’s little Ozai’s very bitter bc she “killed” Ursa, plus he already hated zuko for being too weak, plus there’s no Ursa to challenge him. so he can basically do whatever tf he wants to them and be an abusive fucking dick

But then, Azula starts fire bending and is clearly a prodigy. Ozai suddenly takes an interest in her. She’s terrified of her dad so she does w/e tf he wants to keep him happy.

Except she refuses to hurt zuko. he’s her big brother and she loves him. She (secretly) stays really close with him, though is skilled enough at manipulation that Ozai thinks she’s basically cut herself off from zuko/hate him. Which zuko is fine with, he wants Azula to be safe from Ozai and if that means she needs to pretend to hate him when their dad is in the room? He doesn’t care, he knows his baby sister and knows she loves him

Anyway yeah Ozai starts to like her better and treats her.... “better”. (Note the quotations.) but she still feels guilty that Zuko’s getting the brunt of ozai’s wrath, so she does her best to keep Ozai’s attention on how good she is instead of how much of a failure zuko is.

Quick side note: if Azula seems ooc that’s on purpose. We know her toxcicity is a result of Ozai’s influence. But here he has way less control over her. Bc Ozai mainly controls her by using fear. And while she is afraid of him, she’s not nearly as afraid in this AU. a) bc Azula has her over protective big brother being over protective and b) Ursa’s dead so there’s no mother who is supposed to protect her failing to protect her and making Azula feel unsafe

So in this she’s much closer personality wise to like a “season 1 zuko” version of herself. She’s in general cool but tends to loose control of herself. Though she also has a lot more self confidence than zuko did, and maybe a bit too much pride. She’d never hit someone who was already down and cares for ppl, but pretends that she cares for no one

So yeah. The two are just kinda surviving living in the castle and love eacother a lot

Until they hear about the whole kill ur first born thing....... (which happens about 2 yrs after cannon bc Iroh came home when he heard his sister in law died and the whole siege of ba sing se was postponed)

Instead of like. Waiting for her brother to get murdered tiny 9 yr old Azula packs up their shit and gets ready to go on the run

Unfortunately she’s (almost) too late. While she’s getting ready to leave Zuko is trying to cover for her (Ozai would be murderus if he knew Azula was gonna betrey him by leaving) and somehow manages to insult Ozai while trying to protect Azula from being found out

Ozai gets big mad, and in a fit of rage tries to kill zuko by burning half his face off.

Azula runs in at the sound of her brother’s screams, at the exact same time two gaurd rush into the royal chambers. The guards are frozen in shock, but Azula is pissed

Azula attacks her dad. At first she has the upper hand/element of surprise but... she’s 9.

she starts loosing. Her forearm gets really badly burned in a suspiciously hand-shaped pattern.

During the fight Zuko’s struggling to lift himself from the ground and help. He manages to save Azula from a killing blow by throwing some fire at Ozai, but collapses immediately after. Azula barely has a second to breathe before Ozai starts attacking again.

For a moment it legitimately looks like Ozai is going to murder his two young children in cold blood

Until one of the guards snaps.

She uses the whole fucked up situation to knock Ozai out, though she doesn’t kill him. The other gaurd is just standing there, and she has no clue who he’s gonna help so she just knocks him out

Then the gaurd grabs zuko and Azula, and fucking BOOKS IT from the castle. She does a blue spirit type thing to escape (threatening to kill either Azula or zuko) and eventually gets them somewhere safe where she can get their wounds treated

The next day the fire lord puts out this whole sob story about how an assassin pretended to be a gaurd, killed his father, then kiddnapped his children. And how he’s sending out a whole manhunt for his lost children yada yada yada

The other gaurd that was there mysteriously disappears a few days later, but not before he can spread some “rumors” about the prince and princess’s disappearance. Ozai ascends to the throne and publicly offers an enormous reward for the return of his children,,,,,, while secretly sending assassins after them. (Like.... Azula attacked him and he already tried to kill zuko he don’t give a fuck)

Iroh is obviously devestated when he finds out. and while he thinks the whole thing is a bit suspicious he starts on a journey desperately looking for his lost niece and nephew

While all this BS is happening this poor gaurd suddenly has 2 damaged af kids to take care of and a bunch of assassins to run from

So once zuko and Azula are healed enough to travel and they know zuko won’t die, they go on the run. They can’t stay in one place bc of all the assassins after them and end up going all over the world

They don’t spend a lot of time in the fire nation (for obvious reasons) but they do spend bits and pieces there. Connecting with their people, meeting freinds of the gaurd who saved them that can help (like Lt Jee who ran Zuko’s ship in cannon) and spreading the truth of what happened.

Stories about the damaged prince and princess who were so hurt by their father begin to spread. But even more stories about how the prince and princess care for their people spread ten times faster. Stories they take time to rebuild small fire nation villages damaged by floods, or how corrupt military commanders suspicious disappear after they come to town start to spread.

Ppl start calling them the dragon princess and pheonix prince. Because the princess protects her people like a dragon protects it’s hoard, by killing everyone who dares to endanger it. And the prince has risin from the ashes (you can see the burn clear as day on his face), to heal the land and his people

(Though really..... the prince and princess are both dragons and pheonixes. Because even if she seems invincible and more ruthless than her brother, the princess has been hurt deeply. Though her wound is more easily covered. And she aches for the pain of her nation, the nation she feels she wasn’t strong enough to protect. She just hides her emotions better than her brother....)

(As for the prince, yes he shows more kindness than his sister seems too. But he is just as ruthless as her if someone threatens their hoard. He’s just a bit calmer.... less trigger happy than his twin. It was his idea to take out the corrupt commandor stealing a small town’s livelihoods, after all)

They call the gaurd who saved them “the Kitsune”. They say she is a flame wielding spirit, sent by Agni himself to protect the true leaders of the fire nation

Iroh overhears bits and pieces about them. He starts to get an idea of what’s happening, but for the most part he really struggles to track them. Ppl can recognize him, and they won’t sell out their prince and princess to someone who might take them away

So yeah. The three of them are on the run together for a long time. They can never spend long in one place (assassins never stop coming after them) and dart all over the earth kingdom and fire nation, seeing first hand the effects of the war. And gaining a positive reputation both for caring about their people in a way no one since before Sozin has, as well as shaming dishonorable fire nation soldiers who mistreat those in the earth kingdom

(They almost never hurt foot soldiers who are just following orders, but any one (especially upper command) who take clear pleasure in other’s suffering are often challenged to Agni kai’s in exchange for said soldiers leaving.

Though usually just being publicly knocked on their asses by a couple of scarred kids who turn out to literally be the lost prince and princess holy shit, is enough to put them in their place)

So yeah. They travel together earning a good reputation from as soon as they’re healed until zuko and azula are 14 and 11 respectively

At that point they get separated from the gaurd.... (she doesn’t die, either captured or separated for some other reason)

So now.... all they have is eachother

The two spend the next two years on their own. They still try to do the same types of stuff they did before but now they’re in a lot more danger w/o an adult to help them. They’re basically just.... 2 increasingly ferel children struggling to survive. They live mostly off of like foraged stuff and whatever money they can make/steal from rich assholes

They continue to dodge Iroh as well bc they have no clue if he’s gonna return them to their father or kill them or w/e. Which is wayyyy harder than it would seem, the only reason he hasn’t caught them yet is that they have an alliance with June the bounty hunter who keeps sending Iroh on wild goose chases bc she has a soft spot for the weird ferel kids. (And a huge crush on the gaurd who was basically their mom/older sister for a while. But we don’t need to talk about that)

so zuko and Azula are just these absolutely feral kids being hunted by 12 dozen bounty hunters from their father, plus the “dragon princess and pheonix prince” have officially been declared “traitors to the nation that are impersonating the late children of Firelord Ozai” so there’s a good amount of the actual military after them, and they’re trying to keep away from their uncle and all his fucking white lotus freinds

They’re a little bit stressed ok??? And like super protective of eachother by this point

And then who joins the fucking search??? The goddam avatar

Bc he heard these stories about these good firebenders who protect everyone no matter what side of the war they’re on. And ofc Aang wants one or both of them to teach him

So Aang like the lovable idiot he is, is just trying so hard to adopt these crazy feral firebenders.

And ik I keep saying feral but like. I need to emphasize this bc these two spent 2 years on the run + 2 more years on the run while basically living in fucking forests cus they’re out of money, connections, and the gaurd was the only one out of the three of them with social skills. They’re a little stressed okay???

And idk I just love the idea of Aang trying to befriend these crazy feral firebenders acting like they’re just like. Wild animals or smthn. Like cornering them in a clearing and trying to offer them jerky as if they were wolves and the two giving him the blankest fucking expression

Anyway this post is about 200x longer than I meant it to be and I am so so sorry. (Especially since I can’t put in a read more on mobile)

Anyway bc it’s so long i’m just gonna do the last bit in bullet form and try to finish as quickly as humanly possible

- obvi they join the avatar and stuff

- the gaurd (who ima call kit/kitsune cus I don’t have a name for her) eventually meets/joins with Iroh. June later joins them as well as they try to find the idiot fire children

- Sokka has a big gay crush on the feral firebening guy

- Katara has a very tiny crush she refuses to admit too on Azula

- there’s also a lot of drama between her and Azula at first bc Azula is brash and Katara kinda gets annoyed at a mix of that/the lingering bias she has against fire nation ppl but they get past it

- also Azula has ~issues~ where she blames herself for their mom’s death/ is sure their mom hates them but asp their mom comes to her in spirit form and says she loves her (no fucking clue when that would happen but I love that idea)

- instead of having zuko/Azula chasing them they have a really fun variety of different random bounty hunters. Obvi including sparky sparky boom man

- the siege of the north.... happens. Though Zhao doesn’t kill the moon spirit so yue lives, and Azula and zuko manage to make a huge speech and get many of the soldiers to defect to their side instead so it ends with minimal bloodshed

- when Toph joins the group she and Azula are chaos incarnate

-mai and ty lee hear rumors and stuff and join team avatar eventually

- when they find out about the day of black sun they just. Skip trying to talk to the earth king. Cus they can just stage a cou lol they have the people on their side?? Forces from both water tribes, random earth kingdom ppl they’ve managed to befriend,,,,

- though they have to find uncle first bc he could challenge zuko for the throne. Obvi they think they’ll need to get rid of him bc they don’t really know him and think he wants to hurt them but all of a sudden??? 

- so they kinda have a few side quests as they’re preparing and gathering everyone but then it’s the day of black sun!!! And it works and shit and I actually have some other ideas too but FUCK this is SO LONG i am so sorry and will shut up now

[gandr]

Five, err, Four Favorite Passages

Tagged by @gunbun !

I don’t have a whole lot to share yet, but what I do have, I’m very proud of so far, so I hope you enjoy it. I will be linking the stories after each passage when applicable (some of these will be WIPs). Thank you to people like gunbun, @autumnslance and everyone else who made me feel welcomed, it really means a lot.

Without further ado, here we go. (Light 5.0 spoilers)

1. My Heartfelt Feelings

“Ah, how sweet young love is.”

The Scion’s Rogue had begun his teasing even before any feelings were recognized or conveyed. Of course, such antics were either rebutted or outright ignored. Thancred was imagining things, of course there was a fondness there. Oda was an ally, a friend. Someone capable and reliable, if not on the side of unpredictable and wild under certain conditions. She was intelligent, kind and gentle in equal measure. Her casual mannerisms were a nice contrast to her own taciturn personality.

So then why, when she should be sleeping, was she silently watching her training under the Ala Mhigan moonlight?

She had witnessed her prowess first hand during her encounter with the primal Titan, from a safe distance and at the tail end of the encounter. But this….

It was so up close, more personal.

Each brutal THUD that rang out resounded off the stone walls surrounding the barracks as her lance dealt out punishment to the training dummy, over and over. The way she leapt back, landing nimbly and expertly, her tail stiff to keep her balanced. Her powerful, lean shoulder muscles flexing before she flung herself forward to unleash another string of precise, brutal strikes. Enthralling, entrancing, her movements were as fluid as a flowing river, as instant and devastating as a lightning strike.

“Y’shtola?”

Her heart jumped in her chest, but she was caught. Had she known the whole time?

“Ah, pray forgive me for spying on you, Oda.” Her calm tone betrayed her flustered state, but the way the beads of sweat rolled down her collarbones, disappearing into her cleavage wasn’t helping, or how her toned abs glistened in the light from the torches lighting the training area. Or so she gathered; Aethereal sight did lack for some more subtle detail.

“Pay it no mind.” The Dragoon smiled, that sweet, welcoming smile.

2. Unposted WIP (Oda’s backstory)

“Gods, they had a child.”

He quickly hissed an order at his men to cover and get the bodies of the victims out of the area; there was no need for the child to see them.

Indeed, within the ransacked remains of the family’s carriage, a small child curled up in the corner, her ears flattened against her head, holding her tail against her chest when Boernhelm shined a light inside. She looked at him with wide, frightened eyes, and he was momentarily surprised when he noticed that they were two different colors. The pair remained motionless, saying nothing. The girl, tense and rightfully terrified, and the man trying to appear as non threatening as he could; no use traumatizing the poor child any further.

“Hey, it’s okay, we won’t hurt you.” His tone changed from the stern, sometimes harsh tone he normally spoke with to a softer, gentler tone. If his men could hear him, they would likely think he was a completely different person. In all honesty, seeing this small girl hiding in a corner, likely thinking these were going to be her last moments, having likely heard her parents being mercilessly slaughtered….

“Come on, it’s okay. The bad men are gone, we’re going to help you,” he continued to patiently wait, trying to earn even a shred of trust from her. She couldn’t have been older than four, and already forced to witness how evil man could be, “Come on now.”

After what felt like an eternity, she shuffled towards him, seemingly trusting him enough to move from her hiding spot.

“I’m heading back to HQ. Secure the area and report back,” Beornhelm’s orders were quickly given as the girl clung to him. Even during the walk, she did not let go, or move her face from its spot buried in his chest.

Even after investigating into the identity of her parents, there was no one who came forward to take her in, and she had forgotten what her name was; some figured it was induced by the trauma she endured. Either way, Beornhelm had no choice but to adopt the child, whom he named Oda, into his home.

3. Another WIP (Post Vault)

With each strike, a sharp pain shot up her arm. Each time her fist slammed into the cold, stone wall outside of Camp Dragonhead, one could swear that cracks started to appear. The guards noticed her, of course, but none had the courage to approach her to ask her to stop, or even look in her direction for longer than a few seconds. They weren’t necessarily afraid of her, but none of them knew what to say to her. How do you console someone who’s grieving the loss of a dearest friend?

Each time his face appeared in her mind, another impact.

Each time she remembered his voice calling out to her in jubilation each time she walked through the door from the cold highlands, each time she remembered his genuine admiration when he spoke to her, his kind heart, his valiant nature….

Oda didn’t notice at first just how much blood was dripping into the snow from her now injured hand; knuckles scraped and cut open from repeatedly punching a frozen stone wall. It wasn’t the cold that made everything feel so numb….

No.

In all honesty the Warrior of Light had been naught but a walking shell for the past several days. It was hard enough to look Count Fortemps in the eye and confirm that yes, his son died protecting her. The only thing she really could say with any certainty, any clarity was that she was going to make the Archbishop and his cronies pay for what they did. Not just for perpetuating a war based on lies, but for ripping Haurchefant from her.

4. Reunited

“Y’shtola, you still love me, right?” She crossed her arms, looking away, “When you first saw me, and when you thought I was one of those things….even though I know it's because of the aether from the two slain Lightwardens….”

It still hurt.

It didn’t help that she seemed to be acting slightly differently around her. It had been three years in the First, in comparison to no more than a few weeks at best in the Source. That was a long, long time to wait on someone.

And she had been abandoned before.

“You fool. Do you even need to ask such a thing?”

“Please, yes or no.”

Instead of a direct response, Y’shtola tapped her chin with her knuckles, “...You know, shortly after I had arrived here, I was attending to my research, so that I might find a way to help the people of the First and return home to a certain Miqo’te Dragoon, when out of nowhere I felt as if I had been kissed, by a familiar set of lips. Warm and soft, with no shortage of affection.” She could feel that?

“Y-You did?”

“Why yes, I did. What, did you think you could wake the sleeping beauty with a kiss?” She chuckled, but where under different circumstances Oda would have responded in turn with her own jabs, instead her voice cracked as she spoke, “I didn’t know what else to do! You and everyone else just collapsed right in front of me, and the only thing that came to mind was the Vault! Y’shtola, I-”

As soon as she realized her mistake, she strode over and pulled the woman into a tight hug, “I’m sorry. That was rather cruel of me to say when you’re clearly upset.” How could she be so callous as to not consider Oda’s lingering trauma from the ordeals in Ishgard?

But, she still had to answer her question, didn’t she?

Her cheek was so warm in her palm as she caressed her face, foreheads resting together, using her thumb to wipe away any freshly shed tears. No, this wouldn’t do for a reunion three years coming. Their lips met softly, sweetly in a gentle kiss. And then another, and another, the both of them spurred on by the other.

She was almost embarrassed by how quickly she was losing her composure, but after three long summers of being literal worlds apart, she found it increasingly difficult to hold herself back, especially in these moments of reprieve that the two were able to share by themselves. 

[aromanticduck]

So I watched Over the Moon yesterday. I feel bad saying this because I really wanted to like it, but honestly I found it kind of disappointing.

Positive stuff first: great animation style, amazing performances from the singers (especially Philippa Soo), Chang’e’s costumes looked awesome. I can’t really evaluate the use of Chinese mythology because I’m not familiar with it, but I really did like the concept of the immortal moon goddess who lost her true love, and a girl grieving for her dead mother going to find her as ‘proof’ her father shouldn’t marry someone else. The message of moving on from grief and loss is a good one.

Minor gripes: Some of the songs weren’t that good. I think ‘Love Someone New’ could have been great but was let down by how on-the-nose and literal some of the lyrics were. I know it’s a kids’ movie, and I wasn’t expecting something overly complex, but other children’s media has managed to handle this with a little more subtlety. I really did feel like the Robot Devil from Futurama at that point - the characters were practically saying the moral out loud. Also I wasn’t a fan of most of the animal sidekicks - I think the film would have benefitted from fewer of them in bigger roles. Lastly, the rabbits falling in insta-love is peak heterosexual nonsense.

Main issue: The movie didn’t really sell the emotional storyline for me. The opening was sweet, and the mother’s death tugged at the heartstrings, but later on, while there were moments that sort of made me feel something, it never had much impact. To put this in perspective, I’m the sort of sap who cries at movies all the time, but the closest I came with this movie was getting slightly misty-eyed.

I think my biggest problem was the lack of screen-time and development given to the sibling relationship between Fei Fei and Chin. They got split up almost immediately once they got to the moon, and until then Fei Fei had viewed Chin as nothing but a nuisance, and Chin, while cheerful friendly towards Fei Fei, knew almost nothing about her. Then near the end when they’re reunited, Chin saves Fei Fei from the sadness chamber and she immediately seems to accept him as her brother. I know by then she had learnt she had to move on, but it still seems like a quick change. It just didn’t feel real or earned.

One thing I think might have improved the story would be to keep Fei Fei and Chin together on the moon. Instead of having Chin play a pointless game of table tennis, and then get trapped in a dimension that he eventually breaks out of, have him follow Fei Fei to find the gift. They could get into some scrapes and arguments along the way, but then Chin could use some of his skills to help and Fei Fei could come to appreciate him more. We could actually see them bond and become more like siblings. Also, I know this would take up more time, but what if the film took the time to mention Chin’s father? Maybe he died too, and Chin and Fei Fei could empathise with each other over losing a parent. Or maybe Chin never knew his dad and that’s why he was so excited at the prospect of having a stepdad and stepsister. They could relate to each other in a quiet scene during a low point of the story. Here’s how I think it could go.

Fei Fei and Chin go to hunt down the Chang’e doll, even though Fei Fei doesn’t want him to tag along. However, Chin has some good ideas and/or skills that end up being useful, and Fei Fei is begrudgingly impressed, and the two start working more as a team. They get the doll, and things look good, but then it gets shredded, like in the original version. Devastated that her chance is gone, Fei Fei gets angry, and spills out her feelings about her mother, how she thinks her dad is replacing her, how she’s never going to be able to prove to him that Chang’e is real. She storms off alone, and Chin, for the first time, doesn’t have a cheerful response. He goes after her, and that’s when they have the emotional conversation where they either relate to each other over losing a parent, or Chin explains how excited he was to get the type of family he never had. They’ve failed, and they have no way home, but somehow being together makes it less awful. Fei Fei finds Mrs Zhong’s mooncake, and decides to share it with Chin. And that’s when they find the other half of the amulet.

Chin could still have his ‘no barriers’ moment at the chamber of exquisite sadness (though honestly, I don’t think the ‘superpower’ idea was a critical part of the story), and his ping-pong skills could be used while he and Fei Fei track down the doll. It would probably mean cutting Gobi, but I don’t think he was that important. Sorry, Gobi.

Maybe nobody agrees and you all think I’m talking garbage, but those are my honest thoughts. I didn’t like Over the Moon as much as I expected to. I wish I did, but I just didn’t.

[ultravioletsoul]

Can you rank your fave CoD antagonists?

Hello there nonny, sorry for taking so long to reply and thank you for your ask ♥♥

Rank my favorite CoD antagonists? Sure, I can do that! There are several antagonists in the series, but I’ll only rank my top 3. Hope that is okay with you c:

3. Jonathan Irons

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Advanced Warfare may not be a series as popular as BO or MW, but I actually enjoyed the game and I also liked Irons. Honestly, I don’t think we’ve gotten that many antagonists that started out as our allies in CoD (at least I don’t remember any others atm), much any less an American antagonist, so that kinda made him stand out to me.

I’m not familiar with Kevin Spacey’s works, and I barely watched any trailers pre-release. So to see Irons go from someone who I believed genuinely wanted to make the world a better place, where every human being could live in peace and thrive, away from the pointless wars that governments waged, to someone who was willing to use any means necessary to achieve his goals, regardless of how many lives he had to sacrifice... well, that was something that hit me hard.

This man who gave my character a second chance, who treated me (Mitchell) as his son, who cleaned up after the colossal mess that others countries made, helped people from devastated war-zones rebuild their lives and gave them hope for the future, turned out to be someone I was forced to betray because of different viewpoints and philosophies. Despite everything, I think Irons had his heart in the right place, but his methods were ultimately terrible and in his messianic delusions he ended up doing more harm than good, so of course he had to be stopped.

And what I liked about him was that he didn’t start out as a bad man, he didn’t do all those things because of greed, and his characterization wasn’t that of a cartoonish villain. In a way I could find logic in his arguments, he made a few good points about the current state of the world and the inability (or indifference) of many politicians to solve the real problems of the people. But the root of it all lies in the loss of his son, his only child, to a government he no longer trusted nor had any faith in doing what was right. Despite having served in the military in his youth, Irons had grown disillusioned at the way the US handled domestic and international policy, and strongly disagreed with them— opposing the status quo in favor of change. 

One could argue that serving in the military was entirely Will’s choice all along, and as a grown adult he knew what he was getting himself into. Still Irons couldn’t help but think that if that war had never happened, Will would still be alive. So that left him with a bitter taste, and it served as the catalyst behind his actions.

If nobody else would bother to do anything to actually solve the world’s problems, then he would be the savior to do it— whether they liked it or not. And he didn’t care what methods he had to use, how many had to die, or if he had to plunge the world into total chaos before he could ultimately end all wars and bring everlasting “peace” (perhaps one of the greatest ironies) as his dream seemed to be. Even at the cost of such a high price.

I don’t think Irons gets the credit he deserves.

2. Raúl Menéndez

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BO2 is one of my favorite games and Raúl is undoubtedly one of the most memorable antagonists in the series. Much like Irons, his actions were heavily motivated by the loss of a loved one but his life is also one sad story, so it’s no wonder he turned out the way he did. Not to justify him, but it’s not hard to understand what led him to do all those things.

From a very young age, his life was destroyed by the actions of Americans, from the horrors of the dictatorship in Nicaragua (in which the Contras were supported by the US); the crippling and disfigurement of his young sister Josefina, due to the greed of an American owner who burned down a warehouse in order to obtain 11,000$ through insurance fraud. After losing everything during an earthquake, and becoming homeless, Raúl and his father started over by selling drugs, successfully establishing a cartel that was so powerful in Nicaragua that they were equally feared and admired among the people.

But this status and power they had newly acquired concerned the US government, and it wasn't long before they sanctioned an assassination order on Raúl's father and sent the CIA in to kill him. Raúl observed it all, a teenager back then, and managed to escape thanks to his father's training. Though he could do nothing to stop it, nothing to save his father, this event marked him and further embittered him against the US and the West. And the last straw was the unfortunate death of Josefina, at the hands of Woods. He lost his sister, the only living relative he had, and his world fell apart. But if we think about it, Raúl was indirectly responsible for her death too, after the horrible torture he put Woods through in Angola. So the next time Woods saw Raúl he lost his mind and threw the grenade that tragically bounced into Josefina's bedroom and killed her.

So he spent all his life orchestrating a huge plan, a brilliant plan, that would shake the US from the very ground. And he was damn charismatic while executing it, earning the support and approval of billions of people all around the world— even from those who lived in US soil!— to begin a world revolution and end the dominance of capitalist nations that had subjugated other weaker countries, amassing huge riches through market economy and wars for resources, destroying lives and sinking many in poverty. And he also manipulates and pits two superpowers against each other... sending everyone to the brink of another world war, or a second cold war at best.

He wanted revenge on the US for playing with the lives of other people, for taking everything he loved away from him, by making them live in fear and destroying everything they had built. He wanted them to feel the same pain, to suffer the way he did. And he wouldn't rest until he achieved that because he had nothing to lose anymore.

Depending on the outcome, he can get revenge on Woods for Josefina, as well. And though we all like it when the "good" guys prevail and foil the plans of the villain, I think this particular ending had a much deeper and stronger emotional impact. The conversation they have at the end is something I didn't expect. Raúl has come to kill Woods but they're both in a place where the years have beaten them down with the weight of they’ve done and rather than an over the top scene, what we’re given is quite the opposite of that. 

There’s no screaming, no heated argument between them, no dramatic lines. It’s just two old men who had to live with what they’ve done, and who have come to terms with the inevitability of that moment. Raúl slits Woods’s artery with Josefina’s pendant, and then he does something that surprised me: he closes Frank’s eyes, takes him off the wheelchair and lies his body on the bed. Something that is a huge contrast with what he did to Hudson many years ago... the savagery he used when killing him. For Raúl to behave that way with Woods, the man he considered to be his sister’s killer, it raises the question as to whether he still hated Woods after all these years, or maybe deep down he finally acknowledges that his actions (namely torturing Woods and killing his whole team) was the true motive that led to Josefina’s death.

The thing is, Raúl knows that he's to blame for what happened. It's also the reason why he burns himself alive in front of Josefina's grave. It’s because he has to pay for what he's done to her, too, and he chose to do it in probably the most horrible way possible but it didn’t matter to him. Nothing was more painful than living with the knowledge that his sister died because of what he did.

To him Josefina was the true innocent soul, who didn't deserve any of the suffering she went through.

1. Vladimir Makarov

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It’s no secret that Vladimir is my most favorite antagonist (and character) in all of Call of Duty.

Though his background and motives weren’t as well developed and explained as those of other antagonists in the series, his untold story (which you won’t find anywhere in the game, though you can deduce if you have a basic idea of the situation before and after the fall of the Soviet Union) perhaps says a lot more about him than one might expect.

There’s not a lot we know about his past other than the meager information that was provided in some loading cutscenes, but it’s reasonable to think that Vladimir wasn’t always the trashbag that we see in the games. He once was a young man with dreams of patriotism, who wanted the best for his country, who loved Russia with his soul, and who would do anything to protect her, because as a soldier that was what he was taught to do. As a soldier, that was his purpose in life and without that reason to drive him on, he had nothing left.

And however vague his backstory may seem to be, it gives you an idea that Vladimir in a way was a victim of a system that imparted a type of soft indoctrination on him, from a very young age (as many states do all around the world in some form or another, even those who hold democratic values), all the way to his education in the military academy and his brutal training in the special forces, that further cemented this undying love for Russia, maybe in a way that bordered brainwashing.

His true radicalization came after the fall of the Soviet Union with the loss of his homeland and the Soviet culture as he knew it, as well as Russia becoming weak and losing much of her power and influence across the world. Then came his deployment in Chechnya in 1994, where he lived the horrors of a war that most likely left him psychologically scarred after the experiences he had to go through. And when he returned home, he was kicked out of the armed forces under accusations of human rights violations during the First Chechen War. And they may be true, he probably did a lot of bad things there (under the illusion that he was serving his country for a higher cause), and sadly it’s something commonplace in many armed conflicts. I’m going to leave this short post here for some details on that.

When he returned from war, he didn’t receive any professional help or if he did, it didn’t work. He didn’t know how to cope, he ultimately was unable to adapt to a normal life, he became a misfit. He had lost his job, he had a stain in his career, and finding a decent way to get by was very difficult at the time when the country was in the middle of a political, social, and economic crisis.

He was in financial ruin, and it was hunger that pushed him to become a criminal (something that wasn’t uncommon for ex military men in 90s Russia). Not just that but also hatred for those in power as well as society as a whole, and what they represented: total decadence and the reason why Russia was falling apart with these “stupid” western conceptions about freedom that in his eyes did nothing but give leeway for debauchery and corruption, which he ultimately sought to “fix” by returning Russia to what it used to be (a god-fearing empire under the autocratic rule of a tsar that was likened to a father to all his subjects, and where religion was used as a resource to legitimize his power and as a moral regulator that maintained the social order).

He pretty much felt abandoned, betrayed by his government— a leadership that had done nothing but sink Russia deeper and deeper into ruin, destroying the values under which he was raised and turning people like him into cynical masses that had lost faith in everything and were adrift without any real purpose in life, no future to look forward to, completely disillusioned that the dreams they’d bought into, the promises they had been sold by the west, were nothing but lies.

He’s still a piece of garbage, we know that, but I also think that he’s gone through a lot of struggles and bad experiences in his youth that marked him and filled him with resentment. Everyone sees Vladimir as the puppet master of the storyline of MW, and we have to give him credit for that, but deep down he’s just a man who has been a slave to his own obsessions and ambitions, unable to free himself from the hatred that has poisoned his mind for years, which led him to commit so many atrocities and strip himself from any semblance of humanity— all for the sake of a higher cause, as he undoubtedly tried to justify his actions at the end of the day.

In conclusion, all three were marked by losses in one way or another, and saw themselves as men who had to take the hard path and do what had to be done. And it’s also curious that Call of Duty, while not a game with any deep meaning on the surface, almost seems like social commentary on how war ruins lives and how anyone can do horrible things if put through the wringer enough times. It’s like these stories are trying to say that bad circumstances can make bad men out of seemingly good people, who wouldn’t have done any of the evil they did if maybe things had been different.

And I think that’s what makes these characters so interesting.

[galleryofunknowns]

Unknown Artist, 'Portrait of a Man', oil on canvas, late 1700s, American?, currently in the collection of the Museo Nacional Thyssen Bornemisza, Madrid, Spain.

The portrait, formerly attributed to Gilbert Stuart (b.1755 - d.1828), was previously thought to be of Hercules Posey (b.1748 - d.1812), an enslaved cook in the employ of George Washington. Below the cut is an edited version of of a Philadelphia Inquirer article written March, 2019, on the life of Hercules and the research undertaken in the portrait.

“This is very different from how Stuart would have done it,” said Dorinda Evans, a Gilbert Stuart scholar and professor emerita at Emory University, who was certain that both the painter and subject had been misidentified.

The other scholars, curators, and conservators appeared unanimous. But there was one more blockbuster twist. The hat, perceived to be a chef’s toque for as long as the painting has been known to modern viewers, was in fact not a cook’s hat at all, Evans said, but a Caribbean headdress similar to one worn by free Dominicans in the West Indies depicted in paintings by the Italian artist Agostino Brunias.

The experts’ verdict: The painting is genuine to the late 1700s, and the unknown subject was a person of noble importance. But it wasn’t painted by Stuart. And the subject wasn’t even a chef — definitively ruling out Hercules and setting in motion a cascade of implications for historians at a moment when interest in him and others enslaved by the Washingtons remains high.

In fact, the conclusions of this meeting of experts, conducted in private two years ago but made public only now, helped spur a researcher last month to discover what might in fact be a record of the elusive chef’s burial place.

That chef just wasn’t the man in this painting.

“No American cook in the colonies dressed like that,” said Evans, noting that the now-familiar chef’s toque did not appear until the 1820s. “It’s a fantasized image of what people want, because people want to have an image of Hercules. And people see the things they want to see.”

The painting, long held as a potential key to the chef’s story, turned out to be a false clue, another myth in a Washington universe full of them, “like the cherry tree and the wooden teeth,” said Mount Vernon senior curator Susan P. Schoelwer, who coordinated the study day along with associate curator Jessie MacLeod.

“There is a real possibility of a sense of loss there. It’s such a powerful portrait,” she said. “There is a real hunger for a dignified portrait of an enslaved person we can identify with as an individual. But when I weigh that against something that … really isn’t what it was supposed to be, I’m always going to opt for being a seeker after truth.”

Hercules the man was very real. He was sold to George Washington as a teenage “ferryman” in 1767 by a neighbor, John Posey, as payment for a debt. And his labors for the Washingtons were well-documented at Mount Vernon and in Philadelphia, where he was renowned for the feasts he cooked at the President’s House between 1790 and 1796. He escaped from Mount Vernon in 1797 — on George Washington’s birthday — and was never captured.

These facts, drawn from house accounts, farm logs, letters, and reminiscences, have fashioned the chef as a hero whose culinary talents earned him special privileges from the Washingtons and an income from selling kitchen scraps that afforded him a notable sartorial style. He was recalled by Washington’s stepgrandson, George Washington Parke Custis, as a “great master-spirit” in the kitchen who, after the meal, would don fine black silks and a gold-headed cane for evening promenades down High Street.

Though he was dressed stylishly, walking the streets of an abolitionist-minded city known as a haven for free blacks, Hercules was still an enslaved man — and he was eventually left in Virginia and set to hard plantation labor.

What became of Hercules after his dash for freedom has long remained a mystery. This painting, now owned by the Museo Nacional Thyssen-Bornemisza in Madrid, was long thought to be a clue.

But fundamental questions about the painting’s relationship to Hercules persisted. They were definitively dispelled in the ultraviolet light of the private study day two years ago when the painting was removed from the walls of Mount Vernon after an exhibition in preparation to be returned to Spain. Paloma Alarcó, the Thyssen-Bornemisza curator who attended, agreed to the examination (and my attendance) under the condition its results not be made public until the museum could conduct its own follow-up studies.

She said that time has now come; the museum has hit a dead end: “We are blind, we must confess. … Maybe we will never know who this guy is.”

This is hardly the first old painting to be misidentified in the often shadowy world of art collecting. Its identification as Washington’s cook was likely added in the mid-20th century to increase the value on a work already misidentified earlier in the century as by Stuart, who famously painted the president in 1796. It remained in private hands and largely unstudied by scholars until it was sold in 1983 to Baron Thyssen-Bornemisza, whose massive collection became the museum, which simply cataloged its previously ascribed provenance as the painting arrived.

But Hercules, as one of the most visible individuals enslaved during that era, in part due to this image, carries extra cultural significance because of the growing dialogue about the founding fathers and their troubling involvement with slavery. And as I shared news of the painting’s removal from the record, it brought a mix of disappointment and resignation.

“Although we always questioned it, it’s kind of devastating to find out it’s not him,” said Erica Armstrong Dunbar, a professor of history at Rutgers University whose book, Never Caught (Atria, 2017), documents the escape of Ona Judge from the President’s House in Philadelphia, where she was enslaved alongside Hercules and seven others. “We don’t have any other such portraits of the enslaved who lived at Mount Vernon.”

On Dec. 15, 1801, Martha Washington wrote to Richard Varick, the mayor of New York City, to thank him for looking into the whereabouts of “my Old Cook Hercules. … I have been so fortunate as to engage a white cook who answers very well. I have thought about it therefore better to decline taking Hercules back.”

What Martha Washington did not mention was that she had already freed her husband’s slaves in January of that year, acting early upon a wish from George’s will with an emancipation that also applied to Hercules.

That New York correspondence has long been the last known clue to Hercules’ fate. And it’s a thread that Ganeshram and Sara Krasne, a colleague at the Westport Historical Society where the novelist is executive director, began to pursue in February with a startling new discovery — a New York City death notice that just might be him.

They looked back to John Posey, Hercules’ previous owner, for more clues. They found one. Krasne uncovered the burial record for Hercules Posey, a Virginia native born in 1748 who was listed in the 1812 city directory as a laborer who lived at 33 Orange St. and who died of consumption on May 15, 1812. He was buried at the Second African Burying Ground in Lower Manhattan — a grave that Ganeshram believes is still under the Christie Street sidewalk on the Lower East Side.

“What are the odds with all these factors — being named Hercules and Posey, being black from Virginia and more or less the same age — of it not being him?” Ganeshram said. “People chose to believe the painting was him [despite all the doubts]. I think this evidence is much stronger.”

A pair of historians agreed.

“She may really be onto something,” said Mary V. Thompson, the Mount Vernon research historian who is soon set to publish her own book on slavery at Mount Vernon. “The name, age, and birthplace information are really compelling.”

“[They] may have found the needle in the haystack,” Dunbar, the Rutgers professor and author, concurred. “I would feel totally comfortable speculating that it was him.”

And so, 222 years after Hercules’ daring escape, the great chef may have been found.

“The portrait was not Hercules, but look what popped up instead,” Dunbar said. “He’s totally not trying to go away — he wants you to know.”

“To think he was right there, and may still be, gives me chills,” Ganeshram said. “Hercules is bigger than the painting, and he always has been.”

LaBan, Craig (2019, March 1). 'George Washington's enslaved chef, who cooked in Philadelphia, disappears from painting, but may have reappeared in New York', Philadelphia Inquirer. Retrieved from https://www.inquirer.com/food/craig-laban/george-washington-slave-chef-cook-hercules-gilbert-stuart-painting-wrong-20190301.html.

[iwaswritingmywayout]

BTMH: Chapter 2: Hasetsu Welcomes You

-one year later-

‘Hi! Y/N Katsuki here! It’s been one year since the epic fail at the Grand Prix Final. I spent the last year practicing with Celestino. I even finished college. Now, after five years, I am back in Hasetsu, Japan.’

It had been five years since Y/N had been in Japan. She originally moved to Detroit to train as a figure skater, but after last year’s brutal lost, she decided to return home. She stepped off the escalator and gasped. There were several posters of herself plastered all over the walls of the train station. Seeing herself grin back at her from several different angles was more than just a little bit unsettling. They all read: “We’re rooting for you!!! Hasetsu native figure skater Katsuki Y/N!”

“Th-this is…when did they have the time to do all this? Whose idea was that?!” She said.

“Y/N!” Minako shouted.

“Minako-sensei?” She said, slowly turning around to face the woman who had always helped her with ballet whenever she was training in Hasetsu. Ballet was very useful with figure skating. It can make your movements look much more flowy, in a way.

“Y/N!” Yuuri shouted.

Y/N smiled widely when she saw her brother step out from behind Minako. She hadn’t seen him since they were both 18, and she was ecstatic to get to see him again. “Yuuri!” She shouted, hugging him tightly. “It’s been so long!”

‘Y/N here, again. My twin brother, Yuuri, and I both trained as figure skaters from the age of five until he ended up stopping at 18 after he suffered a devastating leg injury during a practice. I almost stopped skating as well because I didn’t want to skate alone, but he convinced me to continue skating.’

After talking to Yuuri, she heard a few strangers nearby her start to talk about her now that she had arrived. The things that really stood out are the ‘remember she lost a big competition last year?’ and ‘was it the Nationals?’. She turned around, mortified, emotion clear on her face.

‘Everyone cheered me on just because I’m from Hasetsu. Now, I can’t explain this to everyone, but I’ll just go ahead and explain it in my head. The figure skating competition generally starts in the fall, but I lost big in the comprehensive Grand Prix Finals early on. I couldn’t shake the failure and lost again in the nationals. I didn’t make it to the Four Continents or the World Championships, and now the season’s over! I managed to graduate from college, but I ended things with my coach, and my future is unclear. I decided to come home in the meantime, that’s about it.’

“Can I shake your hand?” A fan told her.

Y/N awkwardly ducked her head, waving her hand trying to scare the fan away. “I’m sorry, but I am in a hurry,” she said, trying to be polite but get the point across.

Minako glared at her. It was obvious that Minako wanted her to shake the young girls hand. Y/N nods and awkwardly smiles before grabbing the young girls hand and shaking it.

“Thank you so much for your support,” Y/N said with a smile, still surprised by the whole situation.

“Never thought I would see the day Minako-sensei had to force you to shake someone’s hand. You used to love doing that, you never had to be asked to do it,” Yuuri said. “How badly did the loss effect you, y/n.”

“Lot worse than people thought it did,” she muttered.

The words Hasetsu Hot Springs Yu-topia Katsuki appeared in the distance and Y/N smiled. It had been so long since she had seen the familiar words of the sign and was so happy to get to see them again. She really missed her family, and if she ever decided to skate again, she knew she would be staying in Hasetsu to skate.

Y/N and Yuuri both smiled as they walked into the building. Y/N looked to the right and saw the World Figure Skating Championships in Yoyogi, Tokyo was playing on the TV.

“After the co-ed’s short program of the World Figure Skating Championships, Russia’s Seonghwa Nikiforov is in first place. After the Grand Prix Finals, he won the Nationals in Russia, as well as the European Championships. He’s still on a roll. The co-ed’s free program will start later today, at seven o’clock.”

“Wasn’t Y/N in the World Championships?” One of the hot spring guests asked.

“She didn’t make the cut, but thanks to that she can finally come home!” Her mother, Hiroko, said excitedly.

When her mother heard the door opening, she turned around. She had a big smile clear on her face. She was obviously very excited to see her daughter; it had been five years since she last saw her in person.

“I’m back,” Y/N said.

“Hiroko! I brought Y/N home! Yuuri came with me, too!” Minako said.

Her mother smiled as she walked to her daughter and son, hugging them tightly. “It’s been too long, Y/N, I wish you would’ve returned home sooner,” she said.

“I know,” Y/N mumbled.

Hiroko walked away from her kids before returning to what she had been doing previously. However, Minako was looking at Y/N closely. She could tell something was different about her, but she just couldn’t quite figure out what it was, until it hit her.

“What’s with that gut?” Minako asked, pulling off her coat that hid her figure. After removing the coat, you could see a bit of pudge on the front of her belly, even though it wasn’t much, Minako made a big deal about it because that isn’t the shape a figure skater should be in. They have to be fit and to her that was not.

Her dad let out a loud laugh. “You look just like your mom,” he said.

“Toshiya-san! This is no laughing matter! This is not the weight a figure skater should have!” Minako said angrily.

“You always did gain weight easily and considering how stressed you must have been because of the competition and Seonghwa, I’m not surprised that you did gain weight. But what can you do? Eat lots of pork cutlet bowls tonight!” Her father said.

“Uh, before that…” she said, not finishing her sentence.

“Oh, right, go say hi to Seonghwa,” her mother said.

Y/N nodded, trudging out of the room and heading to where Seonghwa’s memorial was. She knelt on the pillow placed in front of a picture of herself, yuuri, and the dog when they were young.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t see you one last time, Seonghwa,” she said. While Y/N was in Detroit, her dog, Seonghwa, had died. She hadn’t gotten the chance to see her before she passed, and it had bothered her ever since. It was something she had truly regretted.

Y/N heard a door slide open and she turned around.

“Y/N, welcome back,” Mari, her older sister, said.

“Mari, it’s been a while. Sorry to visit when things are busy,” she said.

Mari just shrugged; it didn’t really bother her that she came when they were busy. It was better than her not coming at all. “Hey, how long are you staying? You gonna help out with the hot spring?” She asked, taking a cigarette out of her pocket.

“Huh? Where’s this coming from?” Y/N asked, curious as to what caused her to wonder about what she would do.

“You went to college, even though you had to study an extra year. What will you do now?” Mari asked, lighting the cigarette and putting it in her mouth. “If you are going to keep skating, I’ll support you, but…”

“I think… I need more time to think it over. I’m still not sure what I am going to do,” She said.

“Hmm, okay. Well, go soak in the hot spring and relax,” Mari said.

‘I was born and raised in Hasetsu, Kyushu, a castle town by the sea. The “castle” has no historical basis and is a façade with a ninja house inside. The town’s sole source of income was its hot spring inns, but most went under. My family’s Yu-topia Katsuki is the last one standing. My mother, father, sister, and brother all work there.’

On the TV the World Figure Skating Championships were playing.

“Group 2 has now finished skating, and Youngjae Nekola from the Czech Republic is in first. His free skate performance, befitting the season finale, was free of mistakes, earning him a personal best.”

“Man, I really wanted to go. If only you’d been in it, Y/N. You could have told me the skater’s hotel room numbers,” Minako said wistfully.

“The last group has just entered the arena. All eyes are on Seonghwa Nikiforov who’s going for his fifth consecutive World Championship gold.”

“I wouldn’t tell you! You expect me to be your one-woman ticket agency to score you tickets, don’t you?” Y/N grumbled, crossing her arms.

“That’s not true! I’ve been supporting you!” Minako said, well, shouted.

On the television, Seonghwa skated onto the ice to perform his free skate. Y/N looked up at the television, debating between watching her idol compete or doing something else to not remind herself of the crushing loss she went through.

“He will be skating last. Well, Honda, this is certainly unexplored territory! It’ll be really interesting to see how far he’ll go.”

“What about soccer? Sagan Tosu’s having a match right now,” One of the younger guests, a regular, said.

“When you watch Seonghwa…”

The guest got up, attempting to change the channel with the remote control. Minako did not like this at all. She slammed her drink down onto the table, wildly reaching for the remote that the guest held just out of her reach. Y/N laughed at the interaction, enjoying watching Minako freak out as if she had just found out someone won the lottery and wouldn’t give her any money.

“Hey! I was watching skating first!” Minako said.

“Sagan Tosu?” Toshiya, Y/N’s dad said.

“Aren’t you supposed to be working?” One of the older guests asked.

Toshiya just shrugged before returning to the room he had just came out of.

Y/N had returned to her room soon after Seonghwa stepped onto the ice. Seeing them skating reminded her that she did miss skating, even after everything that happened last season. She knew that she wanted to skate again, but she still hadn’t decided if she’d return to competition or just do it as a hobby. She was turning 24 soon, and she knew after that she wouldn’t have that much longer to skate. The average female competitive skater would retire around 30, and she had only 7 years until she reached that point. However, at the rate her body was deteriorating, she doubted she’d make it that long.

‘When I was 15, I was practicing and suffered a torn ACL, which required me to have surgery. I was out for nine months and had a lot of practicing to do. Every now and then, my knee flares up and bothers me. I had to end my season early when I was 19 and 21 because of the knee pain. My doctors say I am still fine to skate, but I doubt I’ll be able to much longer.’

She placed on a jacket and some long pants before grabbing her skating bag and heading out of her room. She left the building and saw her mother lifting a crate out of a white van, she assumed it was some sort of alcohol, but she couldn’t be sure.

“Oh! Where are you going, Y/N?” Her mother asked.

“Sorry, I’m going to practice for a bit,” Y/N replied.

“Take care!” Her mother called cheerfully before returning to lifting the crates out of the van.

Y/N nodded before waving goodbye and jogging away.

[nellie-elizabeth]

Supernatural: Inherit the Earth (15x19)

That was somehow simultaneously a crowded mess, and a complete anticlimax. I'm literally just like... super confused and afraid about what the finale is going to be now.

Cons:

Sam's the dog person. That's part of canon. I liked the moment when Dean found the dog, or whatever, but I wish Sam had gotten a moment with the puppy too, before Chuck took it away. A small thing, but one of those typical wrong details in Buckleming episodes, where it just honestly doesn't seem like they know the characters very well.

Lucifer and Michael have a fight in the Bunker and Michael takes Lucifer out really, really easily. So like. Remember when the first five seasons of the show were the buildup to the Apocalypse, and Sam sacrificed himself for an eternity in Lucifer's Cage to stop it from happening? Apparently a fight between the two archangels is just a bit of fisticuffs, nothing to get worked up about. That annoyed me. But I guess consistency has never been something this show has cared much about...

Also just... Lucifer in general, coming back for like five minutes so he can mug at the camera and then be unceremoniously killed? Here's the thing: we had Billie as Death, and she hated them but maybe it would have been interesting to see her and the boys team up to figure out Chuck's ending... but instead, she's gone, Lucifer gets a pointless return, provides us with another Death, who is there for two seconds, says a couple of vaguely funny lines, and then dies... and we still never find out what's in the book.

The fight with Chuck was so badly edited! It was so weird to see him just wail on Sam and Dean, and repeated shots of him hitting them, and them getting up, while he kept saying "okay fellas, enough, please stay down" over and over again. Given that the whole "erasing the people from the world" thing was so much like Infinity War, I kept comparing this fight with God to the climax of Endgame. In that instance, you have a small group of intrepid fighters going up against a big bad evil, and then just at the moment when they're run down and helpless, the whole crowd of friends returns and joins in the fight. Instead of that, it's just Jack showing up and absorbing God's powers, and then they leave him begging on the beach. Not a bad ending for Chuck, which I'll get to in a moment, but the epic-ness was seriously missing from this final showdown.

So, when Jack returned the world to its normal state, did he bring back all of their friends, too? I want to believe this was something that Covid took away from them, where instead of seeing shots of Charlie and her girlfriend, of Donna, Jody, the girls, Bobby, Eileen, they were forced to use stock footage of just random people around the world returning. Would have been cooler to see the epic return... and also super weird that Sam and Dean sit quietly in the bunker talking about free will, and we don't see Sam pull out his phone and call his girlfriend, like... I get not wanting to muddy the ending of the episode with a lot of fallout stuff, and I'm sure we'll get that next week? Like, I hope, anyway? But as it stood for this hour of television, it was super weird to me that the boys didn't immediately want to check on all of their friends to make sure everyone had returned from the dead.

Jack becoming the new God is actually a totally appropriate ending, people were speculating that he'd be the new God or Death or Empty, or some cosmic entity, anyway... and this honestly felt very fitting... BUT, I will say that there are two really, really stupid things about it. One, his "I'm everything and everywhere now" speech was super cheesy... "I'm in the air and the rocks and every drop of rain" or whatever. Such a cliche, I was almost painfully embarrassed listening to him. I honestly would have preferred less is more, here. Like, what if he'd said the stuff about how humans can be their best when they need to be, that was a good line... and then Sam says "what if we want to see you? Grab a beer?" And Jack just says "I'm around" and then vanishes, leaving it vague? I think the idea of a hands-off deity is perfect, of course... makes sense for the "free will wins the day" ending we've got going here, but I didn't think stating it outright was the best move.

The second reason Jack becoming God was rendered kind of comedically awful in the way it happened is... well, elephant in the room, let's talk about how Cas was handled in this episode.

Here's a quote from last week's review:

"I'm worried that Cas dying is gonna get swallowed up with everyone dying and not get its due, thus making the confession completely isolated. Like, here you go, gays, have this one scene, which, in isolation is quite heartfelt from Cas' perspective, but can be carefully boxed up and not touched for the last two hours of the show. If they don't want to touch on how this would affect Dean specifically, they don't have to. He can be generally angsty and sad about Cas, but they could get away with never bringing it up again, and that is some grade-A level bullshit right there, my friends."

And... yeah. Look, I know there are people on Tumblr right now saying that this episode being the "brothers only" ending means that next week we'll get Cas back and Dean will confess his love or whatever... but y'all, it's not going to happen. I'm sorry. I'd love to be wrong. If I'm wrong, I will gladly eat crow and celebrate along with the rest of you, but I just... I've been burned before. I know what's going on here, and it's not what you think it is.

Dean was undeniably devastated in this episode. We see him drinking to excess, falling asleep on the floor, grasping onto tiny moments of joy like with the dog and then being furious and upset when they fall through. But that devastation was not textually about Cas specifically. Sure, there were moments, like him telling God to bring everything back, and then namedropping Cas specifically. Or the way he ran up the stairs when Cas' voice was on the phone. But what I'm saying is? Those are crumbs, there for those of us who care to gobble up, easily ignored and subsumed by the larger losses the boys are suffering. Sam is devastated too, guys. About his girlfriend, about Charlie, about Donna, and Jody, etc. etc. etc. Who's to say their grief is any different from one another, even though they're handling it with different coping mechanisms? The "I love you" wasn't even on the "previously on".

Like. There's a universe where Dean does get a moment of Cas-related catharsis in the finale, even though Misha's not coming back. Maybe he has a private moment to grieve just for him, to contemplate that specific loss. But I'm telling you: I don't care if an openly gay man wrote 15x18, I don't care that Misha found it moving. The bottom line is, Cas confessing his love for Dean was the moment of catharsis the show was willing to offer us. We ain't getting much else.

So going back to Jack, why on earth does nobody suggest that maybe when he's popping the rest of the world back to the way it's supposed to be, he also brings Cas back? This is what I'm talking about with contrived sacrifices. Last week, they could have written a way for Dean to get out of that scrape without Cas dying. And this week, Jack's determination to be a "hands-off" God is not enough to explain why he wouldn't restore his father Castiel from the Empty. Especially since Chuck brought Lucifer back from the Empty, proving that God can do that. Even though that contradicts earlier lore but whatever. The point is, I'm saying it's sloppy. Cas' death, Cas staying dead, does not feel like an earned inevitability to me. I'm prepared to eat my words if they bring him back in the finale, but even if that happens (which it won't), he's not going to be smooching Dean Winchester on the mouth, y'all. He's just not.

So then that ending. "Finally free," says Dean, completely unaware that he's echoing the theme from the end of season five but making it hopeful now for some reason? And that end montage felt like an ending 100%, and I won't say it was bad to see it, see all the memories, the characters... I mean, Charlie dancing in the elevator, getting glimpses of Ellen and Jo, Bobby, Crowley... I'm not going to complain about that, it was honestly quite fun, but it also felt extremely anticlimactic and gave us no sense of where the characters are going to go from here. And yes, I know we have an episode next week, it's just...

Here's the thing I'm scared of, and I'm going to go ahead and put it here in the "cons" section because I don't know where it belongs yet. Despite my complaints about this episode, thematically there was one thing it got right: the answer to defeating Chuck wasn't destined, it wasn't in a book of preordained endings. They had to come up with it by themselves, using the tools at their disposal, and they won, and they get free will now, they get the release from having someone else tell their story. Great. So... what does that leave us next week?

As mentioned above, I really don't think the final 43 minutes is going to be an epic gay love story where Dean fights to get Cas back, I really don't. That leaves us two options: either a tepid re-tread of the themes already established, an epilogue of sorts where we just get to see a life in the day, a new normal for the boys. I wouldn't be furious about this, but I also think it won't really feel like closure for me. They just keep hunting? They keep saving people? That's fine, I guess, but they can't really walk back the fact that God is their son, can they? When they die the next time, do they go to the Empty? Who is Death, now? Are Heaven and Hell okay? Are we meant to be convinced that nothing will ever come back to bite them in the ass, they'll live long lives, and a benevolent afterlife is waiting for them when it's over? I'm not convinced I believe in things being that simple, so it sort of seems like the show would end by saying "okay, and more of the same."

The second possibility is worse, though, that being a total status-quo shift, like the end comes and the Empty is after them and they have to become the new Death and Empty as some speculated, or some wild harebrained plot twist gets thrown in at the last second and undoes the actual good parts of the theme established here. I hope for the first, but I don't know that it'll make me happy, to be quite honest. I really don't want it to feel this way, but Cas being gone is the big elephant in the room, for me. It truly is.

Pros:

I did like the earlier parts of the episode, the eeriness and the helplessness of them being alone. Continuing with the Avengers comparisons, it was very similar to the long, slow opening to Endgame, where we see a lot of grief, a lot of helplessness, an lot of directionless moping. That felt appropriate and it made it all the more invigorating when Michael showed up, giving us a spark of direction in which to move.

While I thought the fight with Chuck was edited really strangely and didn't work for me, I did like this ending for Chuck. Very much like the end of Avatar: The Last Airbender. Chuck doesn't die, which he honestly would have found a satisfying, creative ending for his story. Instead, he gets to live on as a normal human, sans powers, and be forgotten. Brutal and appropriate! It ties back into the free will thing. Chuck can do whatever he wants with his remaining time, but he can't steal other people's choices from them any longer. It's the black and the white, the good and the bad, of being just... human. Which ties in with Sam and Dean being more or less hopeful about their outlook moving forward. (God, I'm so fucking scared they're going to screw up the few things I liked about this episode in next week's finales.)

Like I said, I did find Jack becoming God an appropriate ending for him as a character. It's the right type of bittersweet: he's there, and we can imagine that in the future, he does go visit Sam and Dean for a beer. Or maybe he doesn't, and that's okay too. Knowing he's at peace, knowing he's benevolent, and that he'll do the best he can for the people of the world(s). It's nice, a comforting deity instead of a manipulative overlord. And the fact that his benevolence and kindness and compassion are born out of a human mother, and two human fathers, and an angel who embraced humanity with everything in himself... instead of from Lucifer, who tried to create him in his image? Well, that's a lovely resolution for a character that became a surprising favorite over the years.

As I think I mentioned last week, I'm willing to let this show manipulate my emotions here at the end, when it can manage to do so. So yeah, of course I loved that Cas and Jack's names are added to the table along with SW, DW, and MW. Obviously that's adorable as hell. And as I said, the montage worked for me, it was certainly quite lovely. I just... like I said at the start of this, I'm just frankly terrified of what's coming next week.

I mean, here's the thing, I want an ending that honors Sam and Dean as the protagonists of this show, but I want it where they live in the bunker, and Eileen and returned-from-the-dead-Castiel live with them as their partners. If someone told me I couldn't change a thing about what's happened so far, but I could decide how the last episode went, that's how I'd end it. Showing a network of hunters getting support and able to live more stable, reasonable lives while still doing a dangerous job. Sam embracing his intellectual prowess and running things from the bunker, Dean and Cas going out on the road, Sam and Eileen going out on the road, or any combination therein. Jack watching over them benevolently from above. Jody and Donna and the girls living their best lives. Kaia and Claire as a couple, onscreen. A glimpse of a more stable afterlife, now that Jack is there to run things, the confirmation of a peaceful ending whenever our human protagonists do finally shuffle off this mortal coil. Peace, but change, too.

I just don't believe that's what we're getting. I can't believe it, and that makes me really frightened for what comes next week. I'm prepared to be pissed off. Quite frankly, I'm expecting it.

6/10

[fireember345]

Tang Shen, Jade the Cat Kunoichi Prompt

A TMNT Prompt

Do not own TMNT

Anyone can use it

 If Tang Shen survived but was sent into a coma, still lost their daughter to Shredder

Tang Shen was scarred by her back that showed even when she mutated

Once his wife woke up, Tang Shen was devastated at the loss of their daughter, Yoshi deciding that it would be best to leave Japan and make a fresh start

Yoshi bought four turtles for his wife, to help her heal when they both discovered the Kraang and that strange ooze

While Yoshi became a rat mutant Splinter, Tang Shen became a calico cat named Jade half her original size while the baby turtles were changed too

Tang Shen/ Jade is a skilled master kunoichi with her weapon of choice being the Kusarigamas

Jade and Splinter decided to raise the turtles as their children in the sewers, becoming their father and mother

While Splinter is strict and wise, Jade is gentle and motherly, making sure the boys played nice and they eat a proper meal

Splinter and Jade often contemplate on the loss of their daughter but are happy with their sons

The turtles call her Mistress Jade

Jade often frets over her sons in constant danger

Leo has a soft spot for his mother as he wanted to make her proud

Jade often embarrassed Raph, telling him it is a mother’s job to and to make sure her sons do not get a big head

Donnie makes trinkets because it brightens Jade’s day

Mickey makes Jade laugh and often enjoys the meals she makes

Jade personally trained April

Though Jade comes off as the oblivious grandmother type, but she is a deadly warrior as her speed and strength is even greater than Splinter’s

Jade’s speed grants her the ability to walk or rather run on water and walls with ease

She often offers cookies and tea to guests and her sons

When she learned about her sons’ stroke with the Shredder, she feared her sons’ safety as she made sure none of the foot were near their home and guilt that this is all her fault

Shredder still believes that Tang Shen died and hated Splinter for that

Sometimes Jade is a tutor to her sons as well and is often much stricter than her husband, though she does it in a more jovial style

When Casey met Splinter and Jade, he was surprised that a cat was married to a rat, pointing out that cats eats rats, earning a tail slap from her husband

Jade often helps Raph calm down with Chamomile Tea with honey

Jade loves drama shows and often watches them

Jade adopted one of the Fear Mushroom Mutants and trained it as her personal pet

Splinter and Jade would often have romantic dates and the turtles get gross out by them being affectionate, like kissing

Jade often gives her son romantic advice to son, saying that even though she was their mother and teacher, she is also a woman

Due to her mutation, she often enjoys catnip, tuna, and milk

When Splinter pointed out that it wasn’t the first time a girl made a fool out of a warrior, Jade told them the story of how Splinter once tried to pluck an apple from a tall tree and landed in an apple barrel, laughing at the memory

When Shredder confronted Splinter, he was shock to learn she was still alive and a mutant, blaming Splinter for it

But Jade told him that she will never love him and that she hated Shredder for what he did to their daughter

Both Splinter and Jade were shocked that their daughter was still alive, but a student of the Shredder

Shredder told Karai that Splinter mutated her mother and brainwashed her

When Karai found out the truth, she met with their parents and Jade told her she could never love Shredder for the hate inside him

When Karai became a snake Shredder blame Splinter, believing that Splinter would turn everyone they love into mutants

Jade was thrilled her daughter was freed by Splinter as she told her that she will always be her daughter, both hers and Splinters

Jade was shocked by the truce by Shredder, saying that she was proud of him letting go of his hated, but she was wrong

Jade joined the Turtles in space, missing her husband

When they traveled back in time, Splinter nearly fell over at the sight of two of his wives, both were poking fun at her silly husband, but his future version of Jade was happy that Splinter survived

Both Jades took down Shredder with Splinter, telling him that he is the true monster

The past Jade went with the boys to make sure they stay out of trouble while the future version stayed with the future version of April, Casey, and her boys

She tells Splinter that their daughter is a grown woman now and needed to respect her decisions, despite Splinter’s right to be worried as a father

Jade was a master to Alopex when she fled from her brother with his tail

Jade tried to sway her from vengeance long ago, but Alopex never listened and left her master

When Jade confronted Alopex when she was about to deal the final blow to her brother, she stopped and apologized to her former master for rejecting her lesson in mercy

When Tigerclaw was going to blast Alopex, Jade cut off his arm with her claws, telling Tigerclaw that he had no honor and Alopex was a better warrior than him

Jade offered Alopex a place to stay, but the fox declined, wanting to find herself

Jade and Splinter were both willing to die together as they fell with the Shredder into the abyss

Splinter Awakes from his hallucination to find an unconscious Jade as he awake her from her nightmares of the Shredder 

Jade often give her daughter advice and tell stories of her youth and father

Karai asks if men are often drooling idiots, Jade smiles and said that only when they are infatuated, which Jade tells her and April that is the most deadly weapons of a Kunoichi, even Splinter can fall under her spell in sparing

Super Shredder was obsessed in finding Jade and Karai then killing them

She was heartbroken when Shredder killed Splinter and fell into a coma once more, only when Super Shredder was slain, did she awake, worrying her sons and daughter that they would lose her too

Jade is visited often by the spirit of her husband as they knew that not even death would separate them

When Shredder was resurrected, all he wanted was to earn the forgiveness of Tang Shen

Right before Shredder sacrifice himself to stop the Demodragon, he looked to Jade and told her that he was sorry and that he still loved her

As Splinter’s spirit was ready to ascend, Jade and he shared a final kiss before he disappeared, her promising to look after their family

[morganaseren]

So since chapter 17 of OtSttCA deals with Niamh meeting the Champion of Kirkwall, let me introduce you all to Emrys Hawke, my Reaver Warrior from DA2!

So she takes after her father Malcolm with the dark hair and light blue eyes (in my headcanon anyway). Her hair is like Niamh’s in that it’s more of an asymmetrical cut, but the length of it is less wavy in comparison. Honestly, I tend to headcanon that she used her sword to cut away most of the bulk of it one day post-Kirkwall when she goes into hiding. The rest of it is just kept in a ponytail that trails down to mid-back, which you can see a hint of in that last pic.

Of the scars she has, the one she has over the eye was courtesy of Meredith during their battle together. The one splitting the corner of her lip is actually from Aveline, who I believe was wearing gauntlets at the time. Did you guys know that Aveline throws you down to the floor and punches you repeatedly if your rival points are high enough?? In any case, Emrys let her get one good punch in before she retaliated, and the fight had to be stopped by Isabela surprisingly enough. Lol. The final scar across her cheek was when she was helping Isabela with a sea raid.

More background info on her below the cut!

Emrys has strong feelings over the concept of family.

Her father was a man she deeply respected. He went out of his way to help others--even when the situation usually meant putting himself in danger or leading them to move afterward--which she found admirable, and she wound up trying to do the same years later as she grew up. She took the loss of him as hard as the rest of her family, but she took up the mantle of watching after them without complaint, doing her best to provide for them all as she could on her soldier’s salary.

When it came to her mother, however, Emrys always had a somewhat distant relationship with her, who quietly disapproved of her learning the art of swordsmanship and later becoming a soldier. Leandra did eventually become more understanding of the notion when Emrys explained her need to want to be able to protect their family if Templars were ever after them. That never stopped the older woman from worrying constantly about her daughter’s safety though. When Carver died, their relationship became further strained, especially when Leandra impulsively blamed Emrys for the incident, but it was more or less amiable again by the time their family name was restored to nobility in Kirkwall. Leandra’s death still hit Emrys hard however, and although she supports mage freedom, she doesn’t care for the idea of blood magic--especially if it involves an unwilling subject--which is my personal headcanon as to why she’s so vehement about it in Inquisition.

With her siblings, she got along with both quite well. In fact, she was quite protective over them, and in her youth, it wasn’t uncommon for her to get into fights with anyone who thought they could harass the twins. It didn’t matter if Emrys was up against a bigger opponent or even outnumbered; she met them all head-on. Leandra berated her each and every time while Malcolm--and later Bethany--took to healing whatever wounds she sustained from the fights.

Emrys grew less impulsive as she aged, but of the two surviving Hawkes, Bethany is definitely the more level-headed sibling. Lol.

When Bethany inherited their father’s magical abilities, Emrys never really treated her any differently. She adored her little sister endlessly. If anything, she became more mindful of everyone else around her, especially when it came to the ever-watchful eyes of the Templars. As a soldier, she never hesitated to use the bulk of her body and armor to hide Bethany from view on the occasions her sister wanted to travel to the village, often to hear Leliana’s stories in the chantry. Then, she often escorted her sibling back home on her lunch break. Thankfully, people most just saw a protective sibling and never once thought she could be harboring an apostate in their midst.

Emrys was also close with her brother Carver, who followed after her in becoming a warrior, and she often helped him train. When he came of suitable age, he enlisted with the army as well, hoping to also help provide for their family. They had a healthy sibling rivalry, always constantly looking to test their skills against one another to improve upon their own. His loss not long after they escaped Lothering devastated her, and she blamed herself for his death for years afterward.

Personality-wise, she had more of a diplomatic leaning in my DA2 run of her, but she tends to be more playful around Bethany and their friends. It’s probably what drew Isabela to her, and Emrys was equally drawn in by the woman who was so bold and unapologetic in everything she did. The other woman encouraged her to be unafraid in indulging her more mischievous side--much to Bethany’s endless exasperation.

With the exception of Aveline--who she has a deep-seated rivalry with to say the least--Emrys tends to get along rather well with her companions. It admittedly took her longer to warm up to Fenris, especially when their first meeting almost turned disastrous after he called her sister ‘a viper’ and an ‘it.’ In the end, it took Bethany calming her down and Fenris apologizing before she allowed him to officially join her party. As a fellow warrior, she came to respect his skill greatly, and after a time, he was able to earn her loyalty, and she his in turn. While Emrys was closer to others within their close-knit group, she and Fenris developed an understanding of one another, so while they aren’t best friends, they do trust one another.

And if it wasn’t blatantly obvious in chapter 16 of OtSttCA, Bethany was part of Kirkwall’s Circle, and that’s how she ended up meeting and caring for the magelets Niamh meets. Thus, Bethany turning herself into the Templars after Emrys returns from the Deep Roads is probably one of the few times she came close to going against her little sister’s will.

That the then Knight-Captain Cullen and his Templar colleagues were able to escape Gamlen’s household unscathed at all was due in large part to Bethany outright begging her not to make matters worse. Emrys has always greatly respected Bethany’s autonomy and would never do anything to intentionally break that trust, but she couldn’t stop the sense of failure that washed over her following that moment, feeling as though she had lost another family member due to her own inability to protect them as she should.

In any case, Emrys has no love of Templars or what they represent to mages.

For a time, her friends were able to distract her from her abject misery, Isabela especially, who she entered into a casual relationship with. Emrys never pressed her for more--despite her own wishes to the contrary--knowing that the other woman would likely bolt were she to ask. To her chagrin, Isabela left anyway once she had the qunari artifact in hand, and while part of her wished to pursue the other woman, Emrys couldn’t bring herself to simply leave the city while her sister was still imprisoned in the Gallows.

Unfortunately, everything came to a head when the Arishok murdered the Viscount, and even when Isabela came back with the stolen Tome of Koslun, the qunari leader refused to leave without apprehending the thief in question. When Emrys argued against it, the Arishok offered her a compromise: a one-on-one duel to the death for Isabela.

She accepted the terms without question.

Infuriated, Isabela confronted Emrys immediately, asking her why she would place herself in such danger for her when the mistake was of her own doing.

“Because I don’t want to lose you again,” she said simply, stunning Isabela into silence, before striding off to meet the Arishok.

As expected, he was a warrior of great merit, and she was nearly done in by one of his blades as he impaled her. While the qunari thought his victory was all but assured with the wound he inflicted upon her, the sudden blood loss sent Emrys into the Reaver’s infamous dragon rage, enabling her to fight with such a frenzy that her opponent couldn’t hope to match. By the end of it, the massive qunari was cleaved in half with her greatsword. Unfortunately, her injury was so severe that had Anders, Merrill, and Bethany not been present to provide healing magic, she likely would’ve died.

The scar over her abdomen is the only evidence of her battle against the Arishok.

She was appointed as Champion of Kirkwall not long afterward, and she hoped to use her new position to help further the fight toward mage freedom, unaware that her activities were drawing attention to her sister still within the Circle... Then, things took a devastating turn with the destruction of Kirkwall’s chantry, thereby casting more fire into the resulting rebellion already raging throughout the city.

In the uneasy lull that followed with Meredith’s death, she asked her remaining companions and allies to scatter to the winds. With Isabela offering aid, Emrys then took Bethany along with the young charges under her care and went into hiding with them. She was able to stay with them for a time until she felt her presence was drawing far too much unwanted attention, especially with the Seekers now on her trail in addition to the Templars.

Emrys left her faithful mabari Rebel with them as a means of further protection before she actively drew attention to herself from Kirkwall’s remaining Templars, giving Bethany and the magelets the time needed to escape.

Despite her title, Emrys never returned to Kirkwall again.

She traveled with Isabela for some months, enjoying the soft, quiet moments with her as much as the more sensual ones, but when the Hands of the Divine began to close in on her location as well, she had no choice but to go into further seclusion again to protect her lover.

When she heard word that the Herald of Andraste was a mage who later became Inquisitor, she secretly sent word to a few of her companions, asking them to help get Bethany and the magelets back to Ferelden. There, she hoped they would be safe with the Inquisition, especially following the very public alliance offered to Redcliffe’s rebel mages.

What happens following that decision will be revealed in future chapters, but post-Trespasser, Emrys goes back to sailing the seas with Isabela, for like Niamh, she has lost enough, and there is nothing in all Thedas that could keep her from being with the one she loves most.