#and MAN ITS DIRE OUT HERE
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
spacetrashpile ¡ 4 months ago
Text
oh kid eternity we’re really in it now
0 notes
chrliekclly ¡ 6 months ago
Note
How did you get your job on sunny? I really wanna go into the entertainment industry.
Tumblr media
iv told th story b4 but i got onto th show bcuz i just happened to b n th right place @ th right time
was working on smthn completely different nd drunk on th camera truck during one of our wrap days me, the DIT, nd the loader wer talking abt fave tv shows nd when i said tht always sunny was mine th loaders just like "oh lol funny im the 1st AC on that. i can get u some days if u want" ???
so i...did some days...then i did a season...and now im core crew i guess
50 notes ¡ View notes
namelessprince ¡ 5 months ago
Text
undersea arc. undersea arc. when. undersea arc when.
#my post#please. please. please. on my hands and knees BEGGINGGGG#maybe if gill didnt get donjon'd theydve gone#bcus it was like. that was when they were like 'its too dangerous out here we need to get ollie home Now.'#but if theyd just gone to the feywild. put on a funny show. fought the doctor. and then gone back to liquidis?#ollie wouldve gone 'just oneee more adventure pleaseee :( pleaseeeeeee :(' and chip wouldve caved and well. well. opens the map.#yeah the undersea capitol is actually pretty close to liquidis#they couldve gone. they couldve gone#I NEED THINGS TO BE NOT DIRE. I NEED THINGS TO BE SILLY AGAIN#although if they go to the undersea its automatically going to be dire anyways.#goddd i want an undersea arc i want gillion to see the REAL elders again#yknow how in ep 53 chip and gill sorta stood in the back and shouted encouragement to jay but ultimately let her handle the situation when#it came to her dad. i think confronting the elders will go much the same way#guh. god i want them to go to the undersea i luterally think about this all the fucking time#going to warn the elders about the navy and the black sea spreading and the nameless prince.#wwhat if gill could show them the room he grew up in. what if they go there and its bare empty. what if they scrubbed all evidence gill eve#existed.#alternate also evil version. what if they somehow ran into gills parents. and he doesnt recognize them but they recognize him#more because of the coral crown than anything else#guh. idk man i just desperately want them to go to the undersea
24 notes ¡ View notes
feline-evil ¡ 9 months ago
Text
Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.
#metalocalypse#jay talkin#I'm sorry they wrote that awful gross little man far too likeable and relatable to on a trans level#for me not to hoot and holler and cheer for the trans pickles agenda#changes nothing about his character arc or any of the show anyone is capable of being the kind of person he is#don't make the mistake of thinking thats exclusive to cis men#his transness wouldnt change that#only adds on an extra layer to him that i think works fantastically.#Listen that dude was rejected by his family driven to drink and drugs young to escape that ran away to be in a band#is called fucking Pickles of all things and refuses to tell anyone his real last name;#over the span of four seasons and two movies he slowly starts to learn to be for others what he never had#he becomes more caring more supportive#it's not a stretch to say he undoes some of the toxic masculinity he's been keeping himself shielded behind#and learns how to be a kinder man.#all of which have no contradictions with him being trans!#In fact it doesn't take much extra thought to find ways a lot of this can line up with some trans masculine experiences#i mean. Did no one else have a younger phase where they swung as far as they could into crass rude and uncaring ways#to try and assert their masculinity only to grow and realise that you can be a man and be more caring.#Did no one else have father issues. 1 800 come on now i know those are both shared experiences a lot of us have had LOL.#at the end of the day this show aired nearly 20 years ago and is finished. we're not getting more of it#so nothing is altered nor changed if pickles is canonically trans or not ok. its fine#i mean hell i dont even need canon confirmation hes trans to me and thats all i care abt#but i think if yr getting suuuuuper weird abt needing him not to be canonically trans you have some issues#and bio essentialist ideals of gender if you think only a cis man can act like he does#again. anyone can be like that. its not exclusive. him being trans would not change him in any way shape or form lol#AND ALSO GODDDUUUGH for once i love getting to see a guy pushing 50 whos depicted as trans#do you have any idea how dire and barren it is out here. we never get to see a trans guy older than 30 and whos not a pristine model#I WANT MORE OLD SHLUBBY SHITHEAD TRANS GUYS IN MEDIA
26 notes ¡ View notes
peachykcqt ¡ 1 day ago
Text
Tumblr media
the amt of weight instantly lifted off of me when i look at this is indescribable
9 notes ¡ View notes
curioscurio ¡ 1 year ago
Text
I finally decided to finish Steven Universe Future and its a little scary how much I identified with Steven this time around. Who am I kidding it was like looking in a mirror. . I have got to move the FUCK out
69 notes ¡ View notes
phagodyke ¡ 2 months ago
Text
the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍
#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man#thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking#mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they#dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done#listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life#i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this#once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i#dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this#ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be#i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about#how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being#given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out#entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please#its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have#to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once#and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general#feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this#but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is#i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired#i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if#i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore#i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr#and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning#my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better#it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood#my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it#cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen#.vent#ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.
11 notes ¡ View notes
confusedlucifer ¡ 4 months ago
Text
eternally pissed off how fucking difficult to find any decent fat body references without just. a barrage of weight loss videos and tutorials and whatever
10 notes ¡ View notes
kisaraslover ¡ 11 months ago
Text
wait should i make pinterest and pixiv and deviantart profiles and absolutely commit to saturating the digital kisara art space.
16 notes ¡ View notes
fairyhaos ¡ 4 months ago
Text
anyways my lovely whimsies i think i was only fully active for like 3 hours today ???? but im tired already so goodnight and ill see u all tomorrow <3
5 notes ¡ View notes
someguyiguess ¡ 5 months ago
Text
save me half pound of mozzerella cheese
save me
half pound of mozzerella cheese
5 notes ¡ View notes
bmpmp3 ¡ 8 months ago
Text
EXTREMELY low effort plug n play cover with very default settings mixing i did in like 20 min but im trying out voisona and holy shit tsudumi's 2.0 sounds SO so good
honeymoon un deux trois by dateken (original vocal rin), UST by purblexber
3 notes ¡ View notes
exopelagic ¡ 7 months ago
Text
tragic: the one time he’s actually queer he has a girlfriend
#probably. probably#pretty sure he came with her tonight and I am not the only one with this impression#which damn that sucks I guess. anyway#like it’s not for sure but if he’s not gay specifically theyre probably together. pretty sure they’ve come together before too so#just like man how do people do this the situation is dire here#this is bc i dont have friends who are men. i know so many lesbians just so many lesbians but i do not talk to guys which in hindsight.#no no this is not entirely true i have a bunch of friends (casual) who are guys they are just Actually straight#or like. probably but are also babies#but man like i thought i at least had a fair shot this time even if he turned out to suck or reject me#either one wouldve been chill! ive just not properly done this from this side before#also sucked is the wrong word there it ranges from oh im not actually interested to yeah hes annoying#i dont think hes annoying he is widely regarded as rlly sweet#being gay hard. imagine#this is slightly incoherent its just 1am and i have had super long day and just got bacl from 2 very intense hours of ice hockey so im FUCKE#just so sleepy. and i wanted to fwoosh put this somewhere yknow#will probably find out on friday anyway and its just. chill. its not like i was super invested in this i will easily get over it#just got excited bc oh my god an actual queer guy in the wild who is cool and i already kinda know#well! im about to pass out so. see what happens#luke.txt
0 notes
screampied ¡ 4 months ago
Note
i saw this on my feed and how about sextherapist!sylus and virgin!reader that struggles with making themselves orgasm? you can go from there 🤗
warnings. — ☆ fem! reader, sēx therapist sylus, virgín reader, praise, dirty talk, semi public, first time squírt, fıngering, mdni.
Tumblr media
“oh, so you really weren’t kidding—were you, kitten?” sylus hums, feeling you writhe around his lap in anticipation. you’re so up close to him as your back’s facing the opposite way of his chest. in the far distance, you hear a plethora of noises coming outside of his office. meaningless chit chatter from his coworkers, loud stomps echoing down the hall, his annoying fax machine that forevermore continues to spit out those same clicking cries, and so on. you’ve been attending sessions with sylus for quite some time now, and you just needed to know how to orgasm properly. you tried everything and nothing would work. according to you, it was dire and you wanted to know if it was as good as people say. “daydreamin’ again?” he coos huskily, hot breath colliding near the twitching shell of your ear. a veiny hand of his softly trails down your inner thighs, glancing at your slid to the side panties. “ah, look at her. she’s so gorgeous.”
“sylusss,” you hiss out his name, gingerly wrapping your clammy fingers around his broad cuffed wrist. “hurry up.”
the white haired man snickers at your agitation, and once he teasingly ghosts two thick fingers over your throbbing protected entrance—his chest rumbles from wry laughter. “my, you’re so impatient. but fine, fine. spread these pretty legs, let me see what we’re workin’ with.”
right away, you sprawl your legs out even further then before and you hear him whistle.
“what a sight,” he purrs, and your head slumps back against his chest. it was almost half past ten at night and sylus was technically off work. your session ended about an hour ago but you just persisted that you needed one more thing.
an orgasm.
your nostrils smell his musky scent of loud rich leather and sandalwood that’s smothering all over his clothing. he brushes a thumb over the lace fabric of your panties before feeling just how soaked you were. “cute, bet you were soaked like this the entire time we were chattin’, hm?”
“f- fuck,” you swallow, and a plump tip of his finger gradually pulls at the string of your underwear. you remain laid back against his lap, gnawing at the bars of your enclosure.
the two of you were sitting on a fat cushioned sofa that’s dipping inward from the heavy pounds of weight. sylus was slow — painfully slow, he knew what he was doing. he lets out a raspy chortle, hearing your slow needy breaths featuring each exasperated gasp that leaves from your lips. “sylus, please.” you moan through gritted teeth, the wait just becoming unbearable.
sylus shushes you, pressing his soft lips up near the sloping nape of your neck. “there there,” and he talks over your whines before within seconds, a finger slowly inserts its way inside. you gasp, feeling your tummy heave. his finger was long, not only that but it was very very thick. you started to hear your heartbeat dramatically thump through your ears as he continues to speak. “pay attention now, this right here?” and you whimper, feeling his middle finger swirl around inside of your pussy. he taps against a spot that makes you feel almost every nerve shoot your body. “this is the clit, kitten. and this,” and you moan, hearing the sloshing sounds of your own mess fill the room. sylus gradually plugs in another finger - his pointer finger, and it fully extends immediately, reaching a spongy spot. “this is my favorite, your pretty g-spot.”
“s- sylus,” you suck in a frustrated breath, realizing that he had not one but two fingers inside. he’s very gentle regardless . . gentle and undeniably slow. oh, the wait was killing you. with your flapping lashes fluttering back against your hooded eyelids, you couldn’t help but gnaw at your quivering bottom lip. this was so much better than your own fingers. his was far longer and experienced. his plump lips starts to kiss near your neck this time, softly lolling his tongue down your skin, craving more of your sweet taste. “more, f- finger me.”
“yes ma’am,” he jibes, and it takes him a few dreadfully long seconds before he’s finally making haste. the tone of sylus’s voice was so deep that it nearly shakes you to the very core—you feel his exact rough vibrato against you. he hears the irregular changes of your breathing whilst his fingers continue to roam inside of your cunt.
“mhm, there’s about over ten thousand pretty little nerves stored up in here,” and he’s just casually talking over your babbling whines. the tips of his fingers were now already so soaked with your sappy slick. it’s gluing against his digits effortlessly — sweet like honey. your folds were just drooling, and every so often, he pulls his fingers out just to stare at the slippery sloppy mess. “how’s it feel? talk to me, sweet girl.”
as your body resumes to tingle from the circular maneuvers of his two fat digits, you let off a loud moan, peering at your left thigh that’s starting to mercilessly shake. “good—fuck, so good,” you whine, the stimulation making you merely bite down on your tongue. sylus hums in amusement, noticing how your thighs would just fail to stay still—it’s cute, you’re a jittery mess but your hand finds it’s way wrapping around his wrist again. “faster,” you plead, and your eyes nearly roll back once he’s just repeatedly toying with your precious g-spot.
again, and again, and again.
your gummy walls accepted sylus’s fingers freely and it was so snug, your mouth can’t help but start to salivate once you realize you’re coming close. he’s quick, plummeting such inches of just two simple digits in and out of you at such a maddened pace. he’s using his entire wrist, his finger work had your toes curling in awe.
“ah, easy now kitten. just relax and bare around ‘em. there’s no rushing a pretty pussy this sloppy,” and he’s speaking right up against your ear again. if you weren’t throbbing then, you definitely were now. sylus even licks against the edge of your ear, giving it a playful nibble. “c’mooon, give me that orgasm, uh huh. make me proud, sweetie.”
“hngh, s-sylus,” you whimper out loudly, your entire body growing tense. sylus’s free hand creeps toward your tummy, softly caressing against your bare skin that’s loosely tucked underneath your blouse. this was so risky. anyone could just walk in and see you - you and him, but you didn’t care—you didn’t care, especially when you were so close to making a mess all his sofa. “fuck, fuck, ‘m gonna cum.”
“let go for me,” he whispers, and his tone was so soothing. it’s almost as if he wasn’t inches deep inside of your swollen pulsating cunt with two thick fingers. in and out, he’s shoving them in and out of you, twisting them around and curling them all throughout your gripping walls. fuck, your toes were scrunched up, feeling such rippling waves surge through you. you were almost positive that if it wasn’t for the help of his hand holding you steady in place against his lap, you’d fall right from his grasp. sylus brings one final kiss toward the back of your collarbone before humming. “atta girl. just give it to me. c’mon, all on my fingers.”
but abruptly, right as you’re coming undone, you feel yourself spraying your translucent slick all on his pumping fingers. a shrieking scream dies from the back of your throat and he finds it oh so cute.
sylus feels you pulsing around him and he grows quiet—you huff out heavy heaving breaths, realizing that you’re squirting. it only lasts for a few seconds but it felt like nothing you’ve ever felt before. “oh my g- godddd.” you collapse back against his chest, his fingertips delicately plying with your prodding g-spot for just a few seconds longer before he pulls them out. slowly, sylus retracts his digits out of your puffy cunt, watching how it’s now glistening with your honeyed sap.
“aw,” he breaks the silence, hearing your pussy squeal again with numerous squelches as he’s dragging out his two drenched fingers. you’re still so sensitive, it’s like your entire body was burning up with fiery scorching hot heat. it’s intense, your thighs shamelessly try to squeeze themselves shut whilst you’re just rigorously shuddering on his lap. “would you look at thaaaat,” and his arms wrap around you. “such a good girl. although you’ve made quite the mess.”
in the midst of him sweet talking, praising you and all, you’re panting heavily. your sighing chest’s raising up and down as you’re just laid out on his lap, exhausted. as you’re chasing your own scurried breaths, sylus kisses the top back of your head. “again,” you moan, a strain in your voice. despite how your legs were still shivering—you craved more, you wanted to orgasm like that over and over. “t- teach me how to do again.”
“to squirt?” sylus raises a snowy white brow, turning you around to face him. his crimson eyes bore into yours and there’s that same sly smile stretching across his lips once you desperately nod. “hm, alright. but this time, i just might have to teach you with my tongue,” and you feel yourself throb once he’s slowly making you recline yourself back against his velvet-colored settee. “now lie back kitten, doctor’s orders. .”
Tumblr media
6K notes ¡ View notes
moscovium291 ¡ 21 days ago
Text
okay so now that we're sober i have some shit to say about this bc like. haha funny relatable fetishposting right. wrong this is about fatphobia
we specifically were talking about carrie fisher's death. a woman who was told in no uncertain terms that they can't put a fat leia on the silver screen. a woman who was under tremendous pressure to lose weight very quickly so she could keep her role, and the extremes she went to for that killed her.
this horror story was, apparently, on the same level as rob mcelhenny gaining weight a little aggressively For A Bit, Temporarily, on a sitcom.
not even that aggressively, frankly. like. ive known feedees who drink straight melted butter for their gains, an extra tub of ice cream every day isn't exactly groundbreaking stuff. but that concept, the idea of intentionally gaining weight, that horrifies people. it scares them so much more than the depths that fatphobia throws its victims into.
in the average person's mind, a thin person overeating to get a temporary beer gut is exactly as bad as a fat person literally dying from being forced to lose weight.
in the car wiuth my roommate earlier and we were talking aboiut the fucked up shit with how actors regularly get forced to lose weight (and realluy dangeroiusly) for roles and then he's like "yeah there was the opposite too thwt one time with the guy from its always sunny. he had to do So many dangerous things to gainm 70 pounds like drinking melted ice cream all the time.... that's so messed up" and im sitting herew like .
*girl who regularly drinks melted icve cream for sex and fun reasons voice* Haha Yeah Thatds Fucked Up. That'd Be So Terrible To Do . Hey Do You Mind If I Turn This Up Iuts My Favorite Song
36 notes ¡ View notes
ozzgin ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
I was 100% thinking of the Shinsengumi when the brainrot struck, but let us assume a more generic, unnamed circumstance for this. Random, uh, elite group of swordsmen working for the shogunate in the Edo period. Here's the awkward, horny himbo I had previously mentioned. Content: female reader, historical setting, crossdressing, NSFW
Tumblr media
Yandere!Captain commands his group with an iron grip. Many people in the Capital know his name, whether it's fellow warriors or petty merchants, and not without reason. His unmatched skill with a sword had even reached the ears of the court, and he was quickly appointed as the head of a newly formed group of samurai meant to maintain order in the city.
As if keeping hot-blooded thugs under control wasn't enough, he is now stuck with an even bigger issue: you.
"We can't have women in here", he declares with a grimace.
"I can pretend", you counter stubbornly, pulling your hakama pants up by the sash, almost in an act of defiance. "In fact, I don't see any woman here. I came to apply."
Yandere!Captain’s reputation does not only revolve around his intimidating strength. Among his underlings, he is known for being completely and utterly uninterested when it comes to women. Will he join his group for drinks after a long day of work? Absolutely. But that’s where the fun stops. When the others begin to slip away with smiling courtesans, he remains at the table with a somber countenance. It is a running joke that nothing can deter this man from his duty.
Thus, your presence at the headquarters should make no difference. He had to begrudgingly accept that you spoke the truth when you'd said you can handle a sword. It's not uncommon for women to keep a small tanto underneath their obi for additional protection, but your knowledge doesn't stop there. You arrived with your own katana and backup wakizashi, swiftly proving their worth upon your first city round when you slashed the arm off a street hooligan.
Well, that's one less worry for the captain. Except, to his great shame, it's not as simple as that. He is the only one aware of your secret, which means that he is the only one available outside of working hours. He was terrified to discover the hesitation in his hands when bandaging your ribs after a stabbing incident, or the halt in his step when he happened to find you switching to a night gown. Oh, how deplorable! Have his morals crumbled into nothing? His latest perverted thought nearly caused him to draw a blade across his stomach.
It is with this faltering confidence that he greets you before the bath one evening.
“You don’t have to do this”, you tell him. "I can wait until you're done."
His struggles haven't escaped your observant eye. You were initially amused by his rather obvious awkwardness; then, a certain idea insidiously made its way into your mind, impossibly tempting: for how long could he keep this façade?
You find yourself going out of your way just to tease your poor captain, perhaps secretly hoping he'll soon break down and give in to his yearning.
“They will become suspicious if you never join us. I do not care for your nudity. Undress at ease”, he says, throwing away his own towel and lowering himself into the hot water. “Get in whenever you want.”
If he insists.
You nonchalantly follow suit, sitting across from him with your arms resting against the rocky edge of the hot spring. You can tell his eyes have wandered involuntarily. His face is red, and he’s wearing a humiliated frown.
“You’re awfully quiet, Sir.”
His lips are pursed indeed. The tall man shuffles briefly, avoiding your gaze. A smirk crosses your features as you decide to approach him.
"In fact, I'd go as far as you say that you're in dire need of help."
To your surprise, he doesn't protest when your hands stray to his lower half, feeling up and down his erection. The small grunts escaping his mouth encourage you to pick up the pace, now equally aroused.
Soon, you feel his heavy arm wrapping around your waist, forcefully throwing you out of the water and onto the cold ground. You open your mouth to complain, but it's quickly shut back by his hot lips, suckling and biting in a desperate hunger to have you.
“It’s improper for a subordinate to take the lead”, he finally says in a low, breaking voice.
He can only hope no one else decides to use the hot springs, though that’s as far as his concern currently goes. He’s much too preoccupied with other pressing matters, holding onto your folded legs for support as he thrusts into you in a depraved, delirious need. His movements are jerky and erratic, with an almost predatory glimmer in his eyes. You wonder how often he imagined this happening. All of his shame and guilt, coming undone at once.
Days later, during one of the hangouts, you find him whispering to one of the courtesans.
“What, you suddenly have a taste for women now?” you question discreetly, unable to hold your tongue.
You’d hoped to be on the receiving end of any future lust-driven gestures from the captain, not some common worker.
He appears to hesitate, twiddling his thumbs and glancing away.
“I was just…asking how you properly please a woman”, he finally confesses.
If he’s going to continue fucking his subordinate behind everyone’s back, he may as well do a good job while at it.
Tumblr media
[More Original Works] | [Yan!Swordsman Concept]
2K notes ¡ View notes