#and I will have another bad day within the week
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
At Your Immediate Discretion
Rating: Mature
General Acacius x Reader
Word Count: 700
You meet General Acacius under the cover of night, revealing what you've been hiding from him.
"I have something weighing on my spirit. It seems that it needs your attention."
"What is it?"
"Over the last several weeks, I've realized…there are developments that have made their presence known to me."
"Developments? What is it you speak of?"
"Sir, my apologies. There is something horrible happening inside of me."
He laughs. "Horrible?"
"Yes, wicked and vile and ugly and…"
His face grows serious.
"Gods. We must get the doctors in at once. Fetch Brenan, he will see you to them."
"No! Sir, it’s more than what doctors’ minds alleviate."
The general, still confused, sits on a stone protruding from the ground.
"The feelings I have…the thoughts in my mind…you would think I’m growing mad. The worst kind, brought on in massive quantity by your presence. Forgive me. I cannot wash myself clean enough. I have tried. Gods, I fear the worst."
"My…"
He takes your wrists in one massive hand, holding them in a firm but grounding embrace.
"You are not…unclean, as you have said. You, of all, have the least to feel shame for. Who told you this was necessary to believe?"
"But never in my life have I felt so indecent, so exposed. It’s unnatural for a young woman of high nobility to entertain, allow, such deviancy. I throw shame upon myself. Forgive me. Depravity echoes through my soul."
"It’s very natural. Very mortal to feel…such a way."
She looks up.
"It is?"
"It is."
"I say again, General. I have horrible, deeply troubling thoughts. Every day. Every night."
"Every night?"
"When you pace by in the corridors. I sense you from gait alone. Across the gardens in the mornings. In the cathedral. Every fiber of my being attunes to yours. I’ve been alone most of my life. I’ve never had anyone teach me the ways in… what I can only describe as carnal desire. The sins of the flesh. Cartha and Tom run through the streets in the night, scheming for conquests. Their company has surely infected my nature. I have plagued you, too. I must…"
"Please look at me."
You can’t.
"There is something horrible happening inside of me..."
"There is nothing horrible happening."
"And it hurts."
"You don’t have to hurt, my stars. Where does it hurt? Tell me."
"Here."
"Here?"
"Yes."
"And you say I am the cause of your impure thoughts."
"Dear gods, how to control it? This fire within, wreaking havoc and destruction where I turn. Please."
"Would you like me to show you…?"
His hand was warm as he spread his touch across your waist.
"Please, let me touch you."
"Oh, my gods."
You lean forward, arms winding around his neck, bringing your foreheads together.
"He holds onto you by your waist."
"Hey. Shhh, it’s okay. You make the sweetest sounds. Are they for me?"
You nod.
"Answer."
"Yes," you breathe.
"I’m going to take care of it, okay?"
You nod.
This is the first time you have ever felt anything like this. Your face contorts at the faintest hint of pleasure.
He slowly pulls her body closer until it’s pressed flush to his own.
"Does it feel good?"
"Yes, yes, it feels so good."
"You’re so sensitive…"
"So sensitive…," you repeat.
"So needy…"
You stop rocking her hips. Looking down at him,
"Is that a bad thing?"
"No, no. Come here. So good for me…"
"…you…"
"Turn around."
You obey, and he kisses your neck as you stretch the skin. You feel your head tilt up, up, towards the heavens. His laving attention increases as your impatience towards relief grows, drawing a slight whine from your core. He grunts, a heavy sigh upon your open back. Another kiss presses to the nape of your neck. Your breathing turns to pants, mouth open, gaping at the worlds above.
#general acacius#general marcus acacius#marcus acacius#marcus acacias x reader#pedro pascal fandom#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal#roman empire#ancient rome#gladiator 2#gladiator ii#gladiator ll#pedro pascal gladiator#marcus acacius fic#marcus acacius x reader#marcus acacius x you#marcus acacius fanfiction#general acacius x you#general acacius x reader#pedro pascal gladiator 2#pedro pascal gladiator ii
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
on the one hand I appear to be having an abrupt mental downswing for no apparent reason and I can expect the next [indeterminate length of time] to be significantly more difficult than it needs to be. on the other hand I'm in the middle of writing a fucked up little story and this will help me with Hopeless Miserable Atmosphere and scene referencing! glass half full kind of outlook
#having a bad evening. but it will pass#and I will have another bad day within the week#and it will pass#and so on and so forth#having intense overreactions to minor or nonexistent things#regularly#until they lessen so gradually that I don't notice them going away. and then a while after that we'll start it all over again#round and round and round baby!!#god whenever it gets like this I'm just. astounded I've made it this long#it's hard to remember how it feels when I'm not down in the muck#so whenever it crops up again I'm just looking back on all the years I've been doing this.... looking back at my 11 year old self#like damn bitch you live like this#damn bitch I've lived like this#for about as much as I can distinctly remember#and it has distinctly shaped my outlook and personhood#you know#yikes sorry for Having A Minute in the tags there. no-one read all that please and thank you#ugh. I'll go to bed at a good time. and wake up tomorrow and go Augh What Was That All About! and wait for it to happen again#fun stuff.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I bought myself some CDs :3
#five of them in fact. i have a collection of cds that i started in high school#and i've been making more of an effort to add to it lately with the decline of physical media#cds are so expensive now. like everything else. but it's worth it to me anyways#i did get two of them used so that brought the cost down a bit#but also! 3 of them have the little booklets with the tracklist and lyrics and extra art or photos#and another has a booklet that's just a ton of art the band commissioned for the album (or one of them did it themselves idk)#one doesn't have a booklet at all unfortunately and it's one that i bought new so it's not like it's missing they just didn't include one#which is too bad cause the one with all the art and the one with no booklet are by the same band so it would have been cool to see somethin#similar for the other album#still tho i'm quite pleased with my finds. i really love having physical cds#i'm certain one of them was the only cd from that artist in the entire store (huge place so much to look at i love going there)#her cds were completely sold out when i looked in the section they should have been in but i found ONE in the recent arrivals#they just keep all the cds they acquired within the last week in this one display organized only by the day they arrived#so i leafed thru the entire week's worth of cds and found this single album and it was such lovely serendipity#august talking
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME BURROWS END WASNT FREE
#I DIDNT TALK TO ANYONE ABOUT IT BUT STILL. SOMEONE SHOULDVE WARNED ME BEFORE I GOT COMPLETELY INVESTED#I know next to nothing abt dimension 20 I’m pretty sure I just saw a post abt burrows end specifically MONTHS ago and was like 👀👀👀#opened a tab with the first episode to watch later and promptly forgot about it#until last night! having a bad night and was like hrm what if I just watch smth#and I’ve been reading watership down recently!! finally got my own copy bc it was my favourite book when I was like NINE#so I am fully primed to fall in love with a story abt little animals rn and man#I am OBSESSED with this and also realising yeah I’m at a point where I could get very into tabletop rpgs now#what if. what if I just get dropout. what if I just do that. would that not be fun. I would like to see the stoats do stuff#i am so in love with Ava and her player and I understand so much more about brennan lee mulligan now. and VIOLA#viola may be my favourite character I’m obsessed with how she interacts with other characters.m#i NEED to know what’s up with thorn’s cult thing. and also thorn. what is going on there#hrrgrhehh the thing that’s holding me back is I’m allergic to subscriptions#impermanence. even though I know it’s fairly unlikely I’ll wanna watch it again any time soon I don’t like the idea that I’d have to like#in a couple years pay for it again or not be able to bc I can’t afford it even though I already paid for it once#I’m a books + cartridge games guy and it shows.#okay. I will chew on this. the price is not unreasonable and I have coincidentally also been looking at make some noise clips#it does not help that I basically never watch things but my favourite podcast is also ending within the next month (2 episodes left)#and this IS primarily audio so I could cook + watch mayhaps. and I’ve heard good things abt all other d20.#they have a 20% off first year deal on. annual would make me less stressed long term if I end up liking this bc cheaper + choice premade#and would also mean I can do it now and not feel bad abt wasting the first month bc I won’t be able to watch much for a few weeks#fuck it I’m allowed to make frivolous purchases sometimes I will simply swallow the subscription distaste#more stoats >:)#that aside all the players are incredible I’m pretty sure when this is done I’ll wanna watch other seasons just to see what else they do#okay go do the thing I believe in you you can spend money sometimes#luke.txt#update I downloaded the app. I am putting off the decision for another day now bc it’s 1:21am and I have not been thinking clearly <3
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
I made a meme do you leik it :)
#i am SUFFERING out here#i have a presentation and essay for one module a presentation for another module and an object to make with a 1000 word explanation??#for another module all due within the next two weeks#and i am unable to get out of bed 👍🏻#fantastic timing dont you think#theres been trouble with my antidepressents so im off those too which ahahahahah doesnt help#and i cant got to the doctors for them cause ill have to fight for it and then that will give them reason to not give me testosterone in#december when im due to get it cause im 'unstable' and my doctors surgery isnt very fond of me starting anyway#im not about to give them a reason to stop me from getting the perscription#so ive just got to fucking raw dog life for the first time since i was 16 how great#no i cannot complete these very important assignments that count towards my degree im trying not to throw myself into oncoming traffic soz#and also trying to manage to feed myself and perhaps leave my bedroom for a total of five minutes at least a day#this has not been entirely achievable but yk im doing my best 😀👍🏻#depressive episode#did any of yall see those two girls with a podcast that said i love my mental illness it makes me who i am#because i think about those two far too often and im so glad everyone was in the comments so much so they deleted the video lmfao cause bro#depression#can suck my dick#in a bad way
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
Me panicking because i have 9 missed calls and 5 emails talking about my absence and how "a colleague could take over for me" vs. Me knowing it's really not that important no matter how pushy a client is and that on top of it I'm underpaid and have way to much overtime so i shouldn't even care
#i have 14 hours overtime#collected within 2 weeks lol#you know how it's apparently mandatory for companies in germany to have a way track employees working time? yeah we're#the only company in the whole fucking country who doesn't do that (obviously that's not true there's probably plenty more but it's#still not right.) so we don't get paid overtime nor does it get acknowledged in any way#so technically we're not allowed to even it out (which most people try to do anyway because tf do they think they are asking us to work for#free) but I'm dedicated to not collect any more unpaid working hours so i take the liberty to leave work early this week#so today i left at 12pm (and then got home 4 hours later because another person decided to kill themselves by train. they should call me#first. or anyone else taking the train. I'm sure there'd be plenty of volunteers to do the killing if it means not another miserable day#stuck in a disgusting train). and i logged in again at 6pm today to see if i have anything important messages (stupid i know)#and i saw the missed calls and that there had been an email exchange with me in the cc talking about the 'changes' made in one of the#articles and that someone else could do that for me since i couldn't be reached and at first i felt ashamed and scared#but now it's honestly just pissing me off. that asshole can't write emails and communicate requests like normal people can he#he already called me last week about something completely stupid and acts like his matters are the most important shit in the world#fuck you if you can't wait one day you should have sent this a month earlier because i won't stay online everyday#just to see if there might be an 'important' change you want me to make Immediately. bitch.#also missed two calls from my colleague but she didn't send any messages about what she wanted so i asked her because i felt bad for not#being online and turns out she wanted Nothing. just hear how i was. JUST TEXT ME THEN???? I HATE IT HERE FUCK YOU#seriously i don't get paid enough for this to bother me so much. she probably gets 12-15€ more than me per hour#of course she doesn't care about her overtime as much as i do. i get minimum wage which is less than what I'd get if i still worked at uni#as a student assistant so fuck this shit it's really not important or worth it. from now on i'll only put in minimum effort too#sorry got carried away. rant over now i guess#void screams#work stuff
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
panic
#landlord wants to move us to a month to month lease and i am#losing my mind panicking#why would they do this if not to kick us out later#i can't afford to move#i. the deal here was so good. i won't be able to afford another place half as nice or big.#how will i do my business without the square footage? i can't afford a more expensive place. we'll never find somewhere this cheap.#this house is perfect. i love it. I've lived here almost 5 years. it's mine. it's perfect. i can't lose it#will i have to quit my business to get more hours at my day job?#can we offer to buy the house? is that feasible? is that even within the realm of possibility? will we have time to find a new place?#i don't want to move i have so much stuff#i hate moving i hate looking at new homes#what did we do wrong#weren't we model tenants?#i can't afford a new safety deposit#will i have to give up my plan of getting a new car? i just reached my savings goals for that#but if we don't get the safety deposit back here i don't know if i can afford a new one#oh god are we going to be homeless#I've taken my anxiety meds and they aren't hitting fast enough#I'm so scared#and I'm so tired. my fatigue is so bad this week. i feel so weak. my brain so fuzzy. how am i supposed to concentrate on anything#i need to answer my emails and i need to write a newsletter and I need to order supplies and yet#I'm back in bed sobbing and i can't think and I'm so scared#got my breathing under control a little but . fuck .#fuck.#fuck!#fuck my stupid baka life
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
Dabi, Azula, dog motif. You’ve put me back in my mha phase but this time for Dabi and I hate you for it actually /j. I can’t go back bestie I can’t add someone to my relatable characters list I can’t do this anymore I want OUT. I told my friend that if you wrote a mha fic that’d I’d be forced to read it and then kill myself after both bc it will FULLY put me back in mha mode but also bc it’ll be the best mha fic I’ll ever read. I know there are good fics just based on the fact that the fandom is huge but I have read so many that just. Make me wanna die? They’re either obv vent fics that have every trigger imaginable in it whether it’s in character or not, or they’re like chat fics or mpreg or something which hey. I’m not yucking anyone’s yum but it’s not for me. You however? I will not be normal about it if you decide to write it I will in fact lose my mind respectfully
To Azula dog motif real quick her being like a trained police dog only meant to listen to one handler, trained to kill but also to sit and listen and obey. Naturally more dangerous, naturally a “monster” but how could she help it? It’s how she was trained it’s how she’s survived. Just to be “put down” when she becomes too much for others and “can’t be helped” but she’s only doing what she’s been told what she’s been trained. You have me sick to my stomach Hella - 🫐
"I told my friend that if you wrote a mha fic that’d I’d be forced to read it and then kill myself after" HELP SDNKDSYKDS
#i have some bad news blueberry anon i am absolutely writing a mha fic#bc it's another long one and ive still got tams and taob to think of im PLANNING to not post any of dog teeth#until ive got a good chunk of it written#initially i was like 'im gonna write the whole thing and then post it!' but to the surprise of no one i am not strong enough#like im the person who posted the first two chapters of tams within a week of having the idea. i was never gonna win this fight#but if i write even just the first part of the series (there's 3 parts total) and just do a chapter a week/2 weeks or smthn#then that gives me a lot of padding so. be warned. something is happening#BUT YOURE SO RIGHT ABOUT AZULA LIKE HER AND TOUYA BEGGING LIKE DOGS AT THE FEET OF THEIR FATHERS#AND THEY TRY TRY TRY TO BE GOOD UNTIL ONE DAY THEY JUST SNAP AND TAKE EVERYTHING DOWN IN BLUE FIRE#ask
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Trying not to be a weirdo conspiracy theorist with a persecution complex about this, but I am getting the impression that the co-worker who has been chilly with me lately has asked not work with me as much as is possible/my manager is trying not to roster us together as much as is possible because the co-worker complained about me.
#the manager said something like#that she'd had to put out a few fires#and that it was 'fine bc everyone had different personalities' which was 'normal'#and it was great that we 'all brought different things to the team'#when I apologised for not being entirely with it the day after I'd had a really bad brain-day#that started with me being late and making about five mistakes (one of which with difficult to manage consequences)#within a half hour of being there#and like... that comment makes me think that my co-worker has been complaining about me#and this week's roster makes me think the manager is trying to have us together as little as possible#which like... seems like a bad sign#since my co-worker is the supervisor and I do not have a permanent contract#also... my manager gave me a copy of the company's bullying policy to read???#and said that it was just a box ticking exercise we were all doing#but I am really really fucking worried that I'm getting darvo'd here#ugh#and like... I literally do not know why she hates me now#when she was so positive towards me when I first started here#she had to cover me when I was sick (which did involve her coming in on a day she had booked as annual leave)#but she said that it was no big deal when I thanked her for it#and that it was six of one and half a dozen of another when she took the day off#and we all had to pull together etc. etc.#so like... I don't know what's going on here??#literally one day she just flipped a switch and started being so critical and severe that I was worried I would cry on the shop floor#every day I worked with her from there on out#I understand being frustrated by me not knowing things or making mistakes#but a) I've actually picked up a lot of things very quickly#(and much quicker than many people would because I have great retail skills and excellent preexisting craft knowledge)#and b) even if I was constantly fucking up and was a liability more than a help... I am still entitled to basic respect in the workplace??#and honestly maybe I am blowing this all out of proportion#and imagining things that are not in fact happening
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#was supposed to be going to Florida and going to star wars land for my birthday in less than a month#that got cancelled a couple weeks ago cause it was going to be too expensive and busy cause holiday week#and we'll do that another time in the off season (when? no clue but unlikely within the next 10 months)#but now i just found out my sister and her husband are going to go down to Arizona to visit my parents for a week#and then they'll all come back together#but they'll be gone until like 5 days after my birthday#so i get to spend my third birthday in a row all by myself#feels bad man#i haven't said anything about it to any of them but it really hurts#i want to not care about my birthday at all but fuck dude#i spent my 30th birthday alone and sick#now I'm spending my 31st birthday alone and none of my family will even be in the same country as me for the entire fucking week#kee speaks#how did we go from literally disney world for my birthday to everyone is going to go have fun without you
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
father pretending to care abt me being successful againnnn brother stfuuuu im trying to drop you off at the airport 😭
#NO im not staying in your damn house for another year to “figure things out properly” bitch i have shit figured out for the most part!!#and what i dont have now is getting figured out the day im out#i will literally have car insurance and medicaid by the end of the month#and a phone with service within like a week of moving out dude#and im literally refiling my fafsa rn#its gonna be fucking fine#also i need to transition so bad if i dont get on t by the end of the year im gonna kms
0 notes
Text
so. um. 👉👈
hi guysies.
Ig I should just say like. Hi
I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.
That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.
Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.
But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!
#the butts chronicles#ogh but yea. been rough.#as said I have no idea if we'll keep this house cause man shits been fucked#uhhhh. lets see. recently my sister got into a fairly nasty argument with her husband since they were both drunk and hes a bit of a. hm#quick to being mad guy? I spose? but yea they made up and he actually apologized to me and my family for that so. its okay?#OH YEA FUCK LOL a few weeks ago fuckin tecksas got hit nasty with a hurricane and GUYS. I FREAKED OUT SO BAD LOL#cuz there was hail with the rain but since. I dont think we even ever experienced hail here I was scared that my ceiling roof broke again#and that it was the rain leaking to my room ceiling and was about to burst my ceiling so I legit started hyperventilating and panicking#with like. short and heavy breathing and almost crying badly until I went to look outside and saw hail and only slightly calmed down#oh but yea it was nasty lol. then the next day almost the entire block lost power and apparently sparks were happening cause fallen trees#uhhh. lets see. hmmm. OH OH RIGHT DAMN I FORGOT WE GOT A PUPPY LOL#we've gotten a lil pup all the way back from dec? iirc and she is now older and a shit lol shes in her teething phase and whatnot#still p cute tho and very puppyish. oh yea also during dec our power went out and ogh man dec was so freezing literally.#almost as bad as the one from. uhhh I cant remember the exact year but I remember it being within these past 4 years at least cause I read#a t0h fic during it lol. oh yea speaking of. we also changed our light company and damn. its been not bad so far! we had to pay up to 300#in our old company and now we dont even get to 200 so far! hope Im not jinxing it! hmm oh did I already say before that I had to get a new#phone? cause I did and I did not enjoy it lol. had it for a while and now and its arguably worse cause no damn headphone plug-in#I think I did mention this but in case. I did finish counseling. well more accurately they required payments again since things and whatnot.#I think? I mentioned the stuff I got for my bday and chmisas. I got mostly neat stuff. I guess. one of them has still yet to arrive lol#uhhhh. hrm. I did get Mr. Martinet's autograph as a present! hrmmm#my other sister got another surgery a while back and its been relatively the same since. hmm. my only other living grandparent passed away#me and my ex got into a. not great argument cause mistakes and whatnot. raccoons in the attic thats hopefully taken care of for now#aaaaand the plushes I ordered a damn near year ago have been technically canceled cause of unfortunate circumstances for the creator#who just kinda. posts things now lol ig.#but yea. lots. holy shit guys. lots has happened. fuck man. I think Ive been way more tired than I thought.#not to mention the past weeks of just. reflecting. man#uhhh#long post#LOL i gues#but yerp.
1 note
·
View note
Text
OBSESSED with the whole american x 141 man combo. smut ahead!
Not necessarily giving up your identity when you move out of the US, just wanting to explore different cultures and see new things. Then you meet one of the boys, maybe it’s Kyle or Johnny, and they introduce you to your actual, literal husband within a week of knowing you. And Simon Riley isn’t a bad guy, they tell you, just a little rough around the edges. And you’re young, in a new country, you flew on a plane for the first time to get here and it didn’t go down so you feel invincible– and you fuck Simon Riley.
The mask isn’t even in the equation, he won’t wear it when he’s not on a mission or on base, and he’s got a scar on his cheek that’s textured when you grab his face and kiss him. He tastes like bourbon. You taste like vodka and lime. He lays you down on your hotel mattress and spreads your legs and calls you love while he’s fucking you.
“Fuck, lovie, like that. Take it like that.” you thought maybe the accent would make it too funny to be sexy but there might be something to be said about pavlov’s dog and the bell here….
He’s so big and so on top of you and he’s pushing your legs to your chest to pin you underneath him while he fucks you. You feel sorry for the other people on the floor the next morning but in moment all you can think is Simon, Simon, Simon and all you can do is beg him don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop���
You’re so happy you got your IUD before you started traveling.
Simon says sometimes he thinks he did it in the wrong order. You fucked and then he took you out to dinner. You tell him sometimes you wish he would have let you ride him that night. He remedies your wishes immediately, all the time.
Did you know there’s only one Taco Bell in all of England? You crave chalupa’s so intensely that you once rode a train for an hour and a bus for three just to have the worst Taco Bell of your life. Did you know that almost 50% of Americans own a gun or are proficient with one? Color 141 the most surprised they’ve ever been when you go to a gun range while they’re stationed in Texas and Simon tries to teach you gun safety but you correct him the entire time.
“I used to go hunting with my dad, Si, I know this.” and then you have decently good grouping that’s just a little to the left and Johnny tries to show you how it’s really done and– misses entirely.
“Is that how it’s done, Johnny?” you taunt, smiling so cheekily that Simon can’t keep his own smile off his face.
“Listen up, bonnie, I’ve done more training-”
“Doesn’t seem like it to me.” you mumble. Simon swear he can see the steam coming out of Johnny’s ears.
“Lass, so help me God, if you don’t-”
“Poor baby, Johnny,” you frown, still taunting him, your hips sway as you walk up to him and take his face into your hands, “Did you get beat in a shooting contest by a civvie? Will you live to see another day?” You shake his head in your hands and Johnny goes red for a completely different reason than his pride and anger. Johnny’s hands twitch, Simon can see him reaching for your sides as you release his face and step away from him. Soon, Simon wants to tell him, she’s going to tell you soon.
#guuuuuyyyyyysssss please don't judge me for not knowing anything about the UK#I know i could have googled it but im just a little rat okay#I don't know anything#simon riley smut#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader smut#ghost smut#ghost cod#ghost mw2#smut
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
You know, after a hundred days of strike, I have noticed absolutely no differences.
I mean, they say shows are canceled because of it, but they would cancel shows for any reason or no reason at all. They often wouldn't tell us one way or another for months or years. Functionally, the uncertainty is the same.
The same goes for delays. How the hell am I supposed to tell if some show or another was delayed? They were never released in any sort of timely fashion before. What does a delay even mean when there is nothing even resembling a schedule? I mean, there wasn't even something like "within the first two weeks of august we will put something up for you to watch."
Zero accountability means they got away with whatever bullshit practices they wanted to, but now its cutting both ways. Any claim that this strike is negatively impacting me is meaningless because Netflix and most the other entities like them have built a system where it is extremely difficult to hold anyone accountable for anything.
And now they seem to think they can just bring accountability back? If they had numbers they could point to maybe it would work, but that's half the battle here. They are desperate to avoid releasing anything that tells anyone outside the company what the hell is going on. So we are just supposed to take their word for it, no really bro, it's actually really bad for you and all the strikers fault if only you could see the numbers that we refuse to show you, you're just gonna have to trust us bro.
37K notes
·
View notes
Text
why have I been asked on spontaneous evening plans by different people two days in a row who do people think I am omg
#not sure if they’re assuming I’m jobless and friendless or if they presume I’m more spontaneous and social than I am#I said no to both I feel kinda bad but 😭 my days are PLANNED IN ADVANCE and I live w someone who I have a cooking rota with like lmao#speaking of more social overwhelming-ness this girl I’ve never talked to before#sat down next to me in class said hi (my name) and then asked if we could get coffee sometime#I said yes bc she seems cool but lol#and another friend who I haven’t talked to in a couple months messaged like when can we hang out AAAAA#being destroyed by my own social life I have so much on atm 😭😭#like I have 2 diff black tie evening events next week?#also also another guy knew me by name in class and was mentioning my group chat comments and I was like idk who you are#and my face isn’t even on my profile pic for that group chat so how does he know 😭#have I become an accidentally class bnoc without actively trying to make friends with anybody?#<- made friends at grad school ofc just wasn’t particularly trying to make friends within my subject ygm#we’re a small cohort of like 30 people and all the white people are weirdos#and then I feel weird being the online no fluent Chinese speaker in an otherwise all Chinese group so snshdjdkd#it has happened to me a lot but I just feel like an asshole making them all speak English for me
1 note
·
View note
Note
I have been binging your work!
I don't know if this breaks your trauma rule or not, but (with the guys of your choosing as long as Ratio is there) how would the guys react to losing reader (they haven't confessed feelings yet) during a mission and thinking they died. Then, the reader reappears a week later bandaged up, but alive. Maybe spouts their confession first? ˘͈ᵕ˘͈
I adore your writing. Thank you!
This is way too fucking long, so be warned. It’s like I rammed 4 mini stories in one but got lost at some point cuz I left this ask to collect dust. Also thanks for enjoying my writing it’s much appreciated. :) 🦦🐿️
Sunday:
The moment he got news that you’ve been assumed dead in the aftermath of a dangerous mission, he looses composure really quickly.
Loosing Robin was one thing but loosing you on top of that was the straw that broke the camels back.
He originally doesn’t believe that you were gone, he refuses to as he practically tears his office to shreds in a fit of anger and grief before forcing himself to regain composure and clean up after his outburst. He needed to in order to keep up the illusion that he was the levelheaded leader The Family needed in these moments of chaos and mistrust.
Even if he himself was breaking down internally alongside everyone else, hellbent on finding the culprit for your death and punishing them so severely that they’d beg for death. He’d avenge you in anyway he could, even if it meant sending out the bloodhound family on a wild goose chase that only ends in dead ends, he would get you justice no matter how it may come.
His heart had died alongside you that day.
So when a week passes and he finally has you back in his arms, all the while being carful with your wounds as his eyes searched you over in a way you weren’t use to.
‘You’re alive.’ He breathes out in relief as he then begins to laugh and rest his head against yours, breathing you in deeply as he relishes in this long awaited moment. ‘Of course you’re alive.’ He mutters.
‘Sunday,’ you began but Sunday was quite to cut you off.
‘Do you know how I felt thinking you were dead? Driving myself insane to prove that you were still alive anyway I could as not to bear the idea of walking through this life without the one person I love so dearly.’ Sunday takes a brief pauses in his monologue, feeling out of breath after having put everything out into the open before continuing. ‘I thought my heart had stopped beating that day and now I have you bad in my arms.’ Sunday then chuckles darkly as he gripped you tighter. ‘I’ll ensure that I’d never have to revisit that part of my life ever again.’
‘Sunday-‘
‘Shhh.’ Sunday cuts you off once more, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he holds you close to his chest, rubbing your back soothingly. ‘Just know that what I do after this, I do out of my love for you.’ He says against your forehead before pressing another kiss there for good measure.
Jing yuan:
Loss wasn’t new to Jing Yuan.
He has experienced it in multiple forms throughout his life, but that didn’t made the news of your death any less painful for the General.
While his mind might’ve made peace with the fact that you were gone, his heart however did not as he would find himself in the places that you often vacated to in moments of stress, or to just be left alone for a while with your thoughts. So to no longer see you in any of those hidden spots -waiting for him to find you like you usually did- only worsened the grief he felt in his heart as he sat himself down and allowed the memories to pass over him in waves.
You were both so happy together and felt a sense of fulfilment that could only be achieved when you were within the other’s presence; A feeling that was uniquely yours and yours alone that could never be replicated, ever. For no one could ever come close to replacing you, nor the companionship you and he had for each other that many assumed would blossom into something more; Jing Yuan also shared the same sentiments as they did, but just as he built the courage to push that boundary between the two of you, you were taken from him before he could utter a single word.
So when a week passes and Jing Yuan found your battered and beaten form in one of your secret spots, back resting against a tree with your eyes closed.
‘Y/n?’ He called out and your eyes opened upon hearing his voice and looking at him with a weak smile. ‘Hey General, miss me?’ You said as you struggled to get up to your feet, only to stumble forward and into Jing Yuan’s chest as his strong yet gentle hands hold you in place.
‘More than you could ever hope to know.’ Jing yuan said as he focused on how you felt beneath his hands, warm and alive.
‘I’m sorry I kept you waiting.’ You muttered against his chest as his warmth made you realised just how tired you were from everything you’ve experienced this last week alone. ‘I never meant to keep you waiting in fear that you’d forget about me if I don’t stay in your life long enough.’ You admit and Jing Yuan instinctively presses a soft kiss to the top of your head, holding you protectively.
‘I could never forget about you my beloved.’ Jing Yuan reassured you as he looked you deep into your eyes. ‘You’ve managed to carve your place within my heart and soul, so much that there isn’t a day where you aren’t all I think about, regardless of whether or not your by my side or far away.’ He finished by pressing a gentle kiss to the gauze on your cheek, chuckling upon seeing your cute attempts of burrowing your face into his chest.
‘How long have you’ve been waiting to say this.’ You asked, thankful that he was the one to admit his feelings first, as you would’ve had a hard time articulating your words as fluidly as he could.
‘For a very long time.’ Jing Yuan replied with a small smile as he then proceeded to lift you into his arms, cuasing you to squeal in surprise, as he made sure to be carful of your wounds and began walking to the nearest medics to make sure your wounds weren’t going to be trouble later on.
Aventurine:
He didn’t know what to think when you were pronounced dead, all Aventurine could feel in that moment was an overwhelming numbness that encased him entirely.
The only light left in his life had been snuffed out, plummeting him into utter and total darkness he had once been well acquainted with until you came along, giving him a reason to keep looking forward despite everything.
You were no longer here to hold onto his left hand before he could even think of hiding it behind his back out of habit, you were no longer here to be his reason, his comfort, his safe place. You were taken away from him unfairly and once again Aventurine found himself asking the same question he has been asking himself for a long time; why everyone was born into this life just to die.
So when a week passes and Aventurine finds himself sat on a bench somewhere, still not dealing well then than he was the week of your assumed passing, lost in his own thoughts when someone took a seat next to him. Aventurine was just about ready to tell them to go away, when he saw just who was sitting next to him; you.
‘I know, I look like shit but you don’t have to look at me like that.’ You spoke upon feeling his eyes gaze upon the gauze on your cheek, then towards the array of bandages that littered the rest of your body.
‘I thought you died.’ He hissed, emotion was heavy in his voice as his eyes became bleary with unshed tears as he felt his breathing become heavy with the reality that you were alive. He didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t in that moment as his mind raced. And it wasn’t until you reached out to grasp his left hand and intertwine your fingers together, squeezing, did everything finally became clear to him.
‘I thought I was too at one point but there was something that kept me from journeying over to the afterlife.’ You admit, looking over at him and smiling sweetly, wanting nothing then to calm his thoughts and reassure him that this wasn’t a dream.
‘And what was that?’ He laughs humourlessly as he stares back at you, wanting to hear what excuses you could come up with for faking being dead for a week. ‘Willpower? Determination?’
‘You Kakavasha.’ You replied straightforwardly and his breath hitched in his throat. You rarely used his actual name unless it was absolutely serious. ‘You were all I thought about as I pushed through my injuries.’ You told him as you continued. ‘Kakavasha is waiting for me was just about all I could think about for a week straight.’ You finished as though you didn’t just confess that he was your soul motivator in staying alive.
‘Really?’ Aventurine said softly, finding it impossible that he could possibly be your reason for anything. ‘Why?’
‘Yes really.’ You chuckled, pressing a kiss to his cheek as you rested your head against his shoulder. ‘As for why, it’s because I like you more then did let myself admit, but i just wanted you to know incase anything truly bad were to ever happen to me-‘
‘No.’ Aventurine cut you off suddenly, squeezing your hand as though he were afraid. ‘Nothing is going to happen to you, not now. not ever. I just got you back.’ He adds resting his head against your own in a desperate attempt of feeling more of your against him. ‘Just stay with me…please.’ He begs you in a whisper as he nuzzled further into you. ‘and don’t go anywhere I can’t follow. I don’t think I can bear the thought of loosing you again.’
You smiled softly as you just whispered back against the skin of his neck. ‘As long as you don’t go anywhere I can’t follow. I like my crush to be alive and close by even if he can be a pain in my ass sometimes.’
Aventurine chuckles, his heart becoming whole again as he made you cuddle into his side, kissing your head once more as you took this moment to familiarise yourselves with each other. ‘At least I’m a pleasurable pain in the ass.’ He teased and you pinch his side, causing him to flinch, but his smile remained and this time his smile was genuine.
His light has came home.
Ratio:
Fully believed that he’d see you when the mission ended, knowing just how talented and dedicated to the craft you were, and having faith that this would be a measly walk in a park for you.
Only to receive word that you were one of the many who were assumed dead when you weren’t found amongst the living nor the dead.
Veritas tries to remain as levelheaded and logical as possible during this time and continue life as normal. However found himself retracting from everyone else and going none contact, more so specifically with the people you were once associated with, and instead focused heavily on his studies and academics to an unhealthy extent.
A week passes and Veritas feels as though he’s seen a ghost the moment he saw you in his peripheral vision, bandaged and dressed in ripped clothing but still somehow finding it in you to smile.
‘You idiotic Buffon!’ He exclaims as he walks towards you.
‘Well that’s a nice way to greet someone you care about.’ You replied as you readied yourself for a massive rant about how stupid you were and so on, but instead you were held against his chest as he burrows his head into your neck.
‘I thought you died.’ He says in a whisper as he breathed you in. This went against all logic but in that rare moment Veritas didn’t care, you were alive but he still couldn’t let go of the fact that you didn’t tell anyone you were still alive. ‘Why didn’t you tell anyone that you were alive, send a signal, anything.’
You shrugged as you made yourself comfortable in his strong arms. ‘All communications were badly damaged or completely cut off.’ You told him. ‘I was on my own for a long while before finding my way back to you.’
‘Me?’ Veritas asked, pulling away from you. ‘Why not a medial facility for a proper treatment of your wounds? Have you hit your head so hard that common sense had been left on the back burner when making that decision?’
‘I wanted to see you first you dickhead!’ You exclaimed, shutting Veritas up rather quickly with your confession but you didn’t care. ‘is it so wrong of me to let the man I love know that I’m okay? So go ahead and call me an idiot all you like but that won’t change the fact that I felt more fear about not telling you how I truly feel then dying on some stupid mission.’ You finished your rant.
‘You’re insufferable.’ Veritas said after a moment of silence and you couldn’t help but feel a little annoyed at this that you didn’t notice that Veritas has began to close in the distance between the two of you.
You scoffed. ‘Oh sure call me insufferable as if you-‘ Veritas cuts you off by cupping your cheeks and planting a sweet short lived kiss against your lips before pulling away with a smirk.
‘Glad to know that the feelings are reciprocated.’ He says, taking enjoyment of rendering you speechless as he gently guided you to medical, and remaining by your side for the remainder of the day.
#hsr imagines#hsr imagine#hsr x reader#hsr jing yuan x reader#hsr jing yuan x you#hsr aventurine x reader#honkai star rail#Honkai star rail x reader#Honkai star rail imagine#Honkai star rail imagines#jing yuan x reader#jing yuan x you#jing yuan imagine#jing yuan imagines#hsr sunday x reader#sunday x reader#sunday imagines#sunday imagine#aventurine x reader#aventurine x you#aventurine imagines#aventurine imagine#veritas ratio x reader#veritas ratio x you#veritas ratio imagine#veritas ratio imagines#hsr fanfic#hsr x you#honkai star rail x you#hsr x y/n
5K notes
·
View notes