#and I love my slutty blorbo

[dongbangskies]

Re: INKODE, Jaejoong, DBSK, and all of the Cassies who still hold AKTF.

Before we start: I just want to point everyone to the "bio" and handle and be very clear that DBSK was the thing that caused this blog to exist in the first place. Back in the late 2000s. DongBangSkies? DongBangShinKi.

I was there when the announcement of the JYJ lawsuit and the end of DBSK hit Allkpop.com. I remember running home from school ready to watch another live performance on YouTube and seeing that article instead. And I remember hoping and praying they just settle it normally, knowing full well it was the end. Because thats just the nature of boybands rights? They make it big and split. And either they all fizzle out or only one person gets really famous.

Even back then, the DB5K Cassies all said the only way they would come back is if someone needs to have their own label, buy back everything they ever released and come back in 10 years after they all establish solo careers.

And even in 2009, I said Jaejoong was going to be the only one that could do it. Make enough money as a solo to make a company or be able to buy back what he spent 9 years working on.

Its been well over 10 years. and he has fought and clawed his way back despite getting blacklisted at the height of his career and spending his remaining hot-topic youth years without broadcasts. And he fucking did it. He has his own label.

Is it still a pipeline dream that Yunho and Changmin will leave SM or do a partnership with Jaejoong after all these years estranged? Is it kind of impossible for a DB5K comeback with Yoochun cancelled for drugs? Yes. 100% yes.

But I've kept the faith for this long. And I won't be stopping any time soon.

To my Cassiopeia community, regardless of where you are now: Hi. I miss you. I want you to know how important you were to my teenage self and hope to meet you under the Red Sea again someday.

[cashweasel]

They make running away from the paparazzi look so sexy 🥴

( @sysba 🥰)

[prettyinpunk]

whats sluttier a man with no shirt or a man in a tiny tiny shirt

speedrun congrats gift for a very special girlie, beloved loml @originofpwoper 💖💖💖

[blorbocedes]

styling wag!nico for monaco grand prix based off his actual outfits~ with a little razzle dazzle

[remyfire]

Being an erotic romance author means that I get through stressful work days by running smutty scenarios in the back of my head that I don't want to forget to write later on, but the fun thing is that Christina is the only one who gets the joy of receiving said scenarios so I can get her opinion on them and if they're worth writing out in full, and anyway that's how she just received five full paragraphs where the punchline is just "something something Beej who has had sex with One (1) woman in his whole life learns very abruptly what squirting is on accident during his first foursome."

[damn-that-really-happened]

[sunnymimis]

Some of my main OCs as One Piece characters now that I caught up!

[swampstew]

𝓢𝓾𝓹𝓮𝓻 𝓢𝓮𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓗𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓳𝓮𝓬𝓽 ~ 𝓤𝓷𝓿𝓮𝓲𝓵𝓮𝓭

October is for ghouls and treats! I am excited to announce this collaboration with my amazing friends who have graciously volunteered to help me bring some seasonal fun to the fandom. Let's have a costume contest but make it One Piece!

𝐵𝓊𝑔𝑔𝓎'𝓈 𝒮𝓅𝑜𝑜𝓀𝓉𝒶𝒸𝓊𝓁𝒶𝓇 𝒮𝓅𝑒𝒸𝒾𝒶𝓁

Our favorite blorbos are being put in situations - this one being signed up for a costume contest. Every Sunday in October, 2 blogs will post their costume contest story submissions for fandom to enjoy. Dates are: October 1st, 8th, 15th, 22nd, and 29th. All stories will be linked back to this announcement for easy reference.

On October 29 - after the last story posts, a voting poll will be posted for fandom to vote on their favorite character's costume to "Win" the contest. The poll will run for 24 hours ONLY. Don't worry, we'll add everyone's story links to the poll too if you need a refresher before you vote!

On October 31st, the winner will be announced along with a special treat! Won't spoil what it is so you'll have to vote and see👀

Your authors:

@swampstew @quinloki @zoros-sheath @icy-spicy @writing-yarn-goblin @mew-ya @bulle-d-bulliver @sanjis-all-blue @leakyweep

Note: this collaboration was pre-planned and organized. We are not accepting requests for costumes or character suggestions. Do not harass the writers. Love your writers. Support your writers. Reblog writers' stories.

Costume Entries:

October 1: Swampstew - Eustass Kid - Slutty Sauron | Quinloki - Marco, Ace & Reader - Full Metal Alchemist October 8: Zoros-Sheath - Zoro, Kaku & Reader - Little Red Riding Hood | Sanjis-All-Blue - Diez Drake & Reader - The Princess Bride October 15: LeakyWeep - Doflamingo & Reader & Rosinante - Twilight | Icy-Spicy - Killer - The First Man October 22: Writing-Yarn-Goblin - Bartolomeo & Reader - American Gothic Painting | Mew-ya - Katakuri & Reader - Frankenstein's Monster October 29: Bulle-D-Bulliver - Kin'emon & O-tsuru & Reader & Kiku as the 4 Musketeers | Quinloki - Buggy the Red Nosed Reindeer

VOTING IS NOW LIVE

The Winner

[dead-fandom-society]

New blorbo alert and bodies spoilers ahead. Can any bodies fans here talk about how ICONIC Karl weissman is??? Holy shit. I have no idea why tumblr isn’t all over this guy yet. He’s the perfect dark murdery bastard that wears dapper suits and has slicked back hair with a slutty curl and a pencil moustache and a COCKNEY ACCENT and he is really witty and sometimes really mean I love it. The insults??? Omfg. We need men to be slutty 1940s detectives again. I love him. I am so feral for everything he does. The reluctant bachelor becomes a father figure archetype that we get for like two episodes. Can we also talk about how iconic his deaths are in the two timelines where he dies??? 1) resigns, breaks into Harker house, shoots Polly, shoots Harker/Mannix in the face (and looks so sexy while doing it) and then knows he’s about to be arrested and faces execution so he lights up a smoke and gets drunk off of Harker’s booze while waiting for the cops. Iconic. And in 2) he does the same murders but this time runs to the bar to hide the record (also asks Hasan for a pint in his carving), fires his gun in the air to get everyone out, STAYS THERE AND LIGHTS UP A CIGAR AND POURS OUT A SHOT, and refuses to come out before the police fire, literally saying “nah.” LMFAOOO. Oh my fucking god. Oh my fucking god. I could talk about his character for hours

[poetry-protest-pornography]

I'm mostly just gonna copy paste my real time conversation with @hotasfahrenheit here, with a free added bits of thoughts:

My Stand In episode 2 thoughts

I wish they translated the title song, because it's tonally confusing

I love when the makeup team adds hickeys

I definitely watched some of this second episode, but I do but remember how far I got, so I'm just rewatching all the crazy

I really need this orgasm-sneeze to be the thing that tips Ming off

I need it

Joe, baby, you've known this man for five seconds, please do not tell him where your spare key is

Ming stop being so fucking awkward challenge

Ugh, Tong is such a dick

Why does anyone hire him? He's always late, he complains about having to do his job and threatens to need weeks off if he has to do one (1) thing....

Ming: "I'm feeling jealous, so I'm gonna be petty about it and hurt Joe's feelings"

Joe: "yeah, I should've expected this"

Ming: are you bisexual (accusatory) or banging the makeup guy?

Joe: I have friends???

(Mia: Listen Ming doesn't have friends so he doesn't understand what those are

Me: oh, that's very clear. Gee, I wonder why that is 🤣)

I love that Ming dresses exclusively in $500 shirts 🤣

Wait, is this girl supposed to be set up with Ming 🤣 He's such a bitch 😆 I love him (forgot to tell with Mia about his slutty little rich asshole silk robe, but bless him and the slutty little rich asshole robe)

(Mia: Ming doesn't know how to function as a person but he does know how to look like a rich bitch)

Joe translating his anger at Ming by being hard on his trainees... Oh baby, no

He's really just "I'm asking for a friend"ed 🤣🤣🤣

Oh, I love this girl actually

Joe with the sex puns, lmao

Ming smiling and then immediately suppressing it is so sad actually

Get therapy, my dude

THE SHEETS ARE WET I AM SCREAMING

THE SNEEZES OH MY GODDD

Also, the work bathroom hook up cut with the training session was *chefs kiss* (the way this built tension and also narrative, and like, showed Joe's inner thoughts? Incredible.)

(Mia: Pepzi, our queen) FOR REALZ

He knows Joe's coffee prep

This is so domestic? (This makes me feel crazy, actually. And Joe's genuine awe at being seen in this small way breaks my fucking hearrrt)

Joe. Baby. Again, it has been five minutes and three orgasms, you cannot invite him to move in

He's being so nice to the stunt men today 😂

Ming:

The way he said Joe's name while staring at Sol like "okay bitch, watch this" killed me

He knew Joe would go to him and he wanted Sol to know real bad

Sol is ready to Fite

Listen, I knew he made him sleep on the floor OF HIS OWN HOUSE, bit it's still deeply funny to me

And then, he's just staring at him while he sleeps waiting for him to wake up so he can give him the bitchiest look known to man

Ming: *is jealous AF*

Joe: you jealous bro?

Ming: No, who would even like you?

Joe: *is the world's saddest puppy*

"sit ups break my back, live breaks my heart". Baby, no.

Lovesick Joe= drill Sergeant

Post orgasm Joe = kindergarten teacher

Sad Joe = bad poet who can't do a sit up

(Mia and I had a conversation about how sometimes, very drunk people want to be on the floor in a blanket, and she is very correct)

Wait.

...

Did Ming go home and make himself the same ramen Joe made for him? (Because he was jealous and bitchy and ran away after making the boy he likes Dad on purpose)

THIS IS MAKING ME INSANE, ACTUALLY?!

Okay, considering Ming is in love with his sister's boyfriend, they actually have a really sweet sibling dynamic, and she is actually The Best.

Why can't we go to a movie and eat fondue? Why did Thailand get movies so much better than we do? Let me watch a movie in a bed or eat fondue while I watch my favorite blorbos.

But also, he clearly just needs like, so much therapy

Like, his thought process is "I love him, no one else can have him, I'm gonna kidnap him". Which is .. Not Normal People Thoughts

"even if I could be happy, I shouldn't be"

THERAPY. THERAPY FOR A THOUSAND YEARS

Sol: " I will flirt by kicking his ass and hoping he kicks mine back"

Oh shit, Joe really just fucking knocked him out 🤣

Ming having a crisis hearing Joe talk about what love is, and then that little smile when Joe said he wanted then to be a couple... (Joe's like, pathological inability to let himself experience emotions is... Several Problems)

This man is insane

Listen, if I'm supposed to hate Ming, they shouldn't have had Up play him

NOW HE'S AT JOE'S HOUSE PLAYING HOUSE HUSBAND. (WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM?)

Rip curry

It's the ramen of suppressed feelings again

JOE STOP MAKING ME CRY CHALLENGE

Look, is Ming:

LADY AND THE TRAMP AND THE GRIP YOU HAVE ON THE THAI BL INDUSTRY

They're so cute that it's actually a crime that I know Ming is a whole red flag parade

The way Joe did the cutest little "please, tell me, please please please, I wanna hear you say the things we both know (you jealous baby)" and Ming was like "yeah okay, I will hum a quiet affirmative and we will never speak of it again" was so fucking cute. I am prepared to cry and scream and have my feelings hurt, but gosh do they do this well.

Okay, I have like, real actual thoughts about this, but also I do not. I am obsessed and too deep in it right now to words, but AAAHHHHHHH

[turtleneck-crowley]

Wake up babes of the GO fandom turtleneck-crowley just dropped their most recent Magnus Opus🥰🥰🥰

Hey guys I am a eccentric genius artist of the century whose works will probably only be appreciated post mortem (self-diagnosed)

Im also very certain you would all blorbos me if I were a fictional character but alas I am a boring meat package that got birthed out of an afab physiology and thus a sack of mouldy potatoes might have been a more interesting source writing this post. (Pure hubris, part irrational resentment that you are all quite familiar with *cheeky hot wink*)

I happen to own a get out of jail free card called catch 22 which is crafted out of part sarcasm, part idgasinglefgtfoofmyfacei180dmycringethroughyearsofpainandselfrelctionthatim toocoolforyounow public image

(if you actually read that you deserve, well nothing actually except perhaps my condolences and a consensual pat on the back that implies my unlicensed diagnosis that you are in fact, not dyslexic)

Anyhow cracking on back to the sentence *sighs and rolls eyes with you*

(-I mean in the streets, not with you guys, here im babygirl with half a brain cell/true form), part wholesome idiocy, years of experience in masking, part looking presentable, part knowing how society and science and art works and trying to be in tact with my own sense of humanity as much as possible -at least to the point where I’m not breaking any humanitarian law…

And yes bitch the whole eccentric genius /madly passionate or passionately mad paradox catch 22 license holder is you af - want a gold star? ⭐️ (crowley ref) (affectionate banter)

Fact is tumblrinas like to heighten and balance their EQ and IQ agreed?

I’m hyper aware that you guys are smart enough to assess me as going through a manic phase that is on the verge of psychotic-having observed hints of madness in my recent posts deducing via your own experiences that I have gone through a strict diet of coffee, whiskey, smut that Neil Gaiman himself would tear his locks and Sir Terry Pratchett would roll in his grave, finished off with a nice slice of Hozier songs as dessert

(that’s on top of of a yet to be discovered food chain which I call the Antichrist diet footnote: please credit me after I die before my Tesla gets Edisoned

‘Tis actually a great alternative way to invoke a psychedelic experience in substitute of the more expensive and questionably unlawful way that is smoking crack *disclaimer not recommended for the faint hearted or those self-diagnosed as mentally stable)

You are perfectly correct! Here’s another gold star!!! ⭐️

In fact I am currently being yelled by my parents to come downstairs because I need to be dropped off to the asylum while I’m trying to actually do something that gives me joy (Joan of Arc eat your heart out) and I assure you I have eyes and witness my very legs , naked and hairy (and did I mention Im only wearing a slutty black bra and skirt that I wore as a swimming suit AND a pajama and now my back to the looney bin outfit?) leaving a perfectly good soup with baguettes as evidenced here

However, I would like to UNO reverse such a caring notion by giving you a purple heart 💜

and divert you with a fun little clip that displays our para social relationship that I am hoping has deepened through my superficial charm to portray our rendezvous as warm and familiar and human as our beloved Mr. Holmes and Doctor Watson:

No worries, Watson also came with the conslusion that the person he’s engaged with (more like to amiright- not us i mean, them, that’s where the analogy is cut off back into our real identities) is “not human”

Anyhow it might not be your cup of tea but at least hold the mug for a few minutes it’s worth it

Head fic: Gods of Sex and Idiocy

(If anything please see it as a game where we can title it better cause I’m shit at naming things - I call one of my plants Joe)

Hey Good Omens fandom

With the note of:

“who needs sane when you have creative”

-turtleneck-crowley

I have made a meta season 3 in my head and the stars have even sent me a playlist ??? (It’s the only one that seems to be downloaded on my wifi less phone)

Here’s the link:

Check out some of my latest posts

It’s really immersive and otherworldly

Down the rabbit hole and through the mirror you go 🐇🎩🪄

And what if season 1 is the ace route and season 2 is the sexual route so season 3 might be an aro route to defeating the enemy?

Ngk idk idc idgaf

I’m just like phone rn

(side note: why do I have the infinite capacity of taking pains (Sherlock reference) for being a mad artist instead of working on the next big physics formula answer? Good question: I’m actually just an emotional idiot aka sexy trash ✨ that’s addicted to blogging and I wouldn’t trade it for any other praise worthy status in the world 💜)

Honestly guys I sound like a sociopath but I’m really just very pained and fucked royally by circumstance that is too dramatic and gay for anyone except the loonies on tumblr to understand. I’m so disappointed by all this unjust pain and agony of the world- the children, the animals, the environment, the people that I have conditioned myself to display an eloquence so pungent it seems like I’m a cold manipulator. For if I ever showed myself for who I was to them- the judgers, the perverted, the scheming, I would surely be dead either by my own or someone else’s hands. Maybe I’m God and they just like tumblr and good omens and want to eat crepes in peace with the personality they split into 2 -preferably in Paris. Maybe they have been placed all the blame by the enemy and they are powerless to the human condition as you all are by an unknown enemy and is fated to be tortured in anxiety and pain invisible to all and the only infinite power they have is love that bleeds.

But I’ll give you and I both the peace of mind that I am an in fact just a mentally ill human whose life span is between the zones of expiration and fermentation, with a god complex, whom their closest people will never truly know how to care no matter how much they try- and in fact the more they try to help me the more they leave me in my original state- alone.

I leave you (no I’m not killing myself you idiot I’m going to the mental hospital to be molested by nightmares of demons - I literally experience it everyday- as they force me to take my sleeping pills which sinks me deeper into it-oh wait that’s kind of worse lmao) with this favorite piece of classical music of mine

Stay safe yall I love you

[orangekittyenergy]

Hiiiiiiii

I've seen a lot of hate on Tumblr the past few days so I want to send some of my favorite creators some love!

I think your artwork is fantastic, especially the way you draw our blorbos just a little bit slutty. 😜

Genuinely though, I love when your art comes across my dash because I know how much time you spent making sure that it was so lovely. The obvious adoration that you put into Gale x Tavs looking at each other is just ::chefs kiss::

Okay bye!

Aaaaaaahhhhh 💜💜💜 😭thank you anon. This made my day! I love you. I love this. I'm totally stealing this!!

Giving you consensual smooches on your lips! 😘

[zzoomacroom]

For the ask game: how about one each for Hob, Dream, and Death?

Oooohh, excellent ask, thanks anon!

Hob:

First impression: wow, this guy is kind of obnoxious. Cute, though.

Impression now: my sweet beloved blorbo, the love of my life, I think about him 24 hours a day

Favorite moment: 1789, just that whole scene. But especially his reaction to the drawing ("I look terrible. You look worse"), and when he breaks a teacup over that guy's head

Idea for a story: the wip I'm currently working on is about him being the last man on earth and going on a road trip with Delirium and Barnabas

Unpopular opinion: I think he probably just has an average-sized penis 🤷‍♀️

Favorite relationship: we don't see much of his canon relationships, but if we're talking non-canon then of course it’s dreamling. I also kind of like the idea of Hob/Johanna(/Dream?)

Favorite headcanon: I've posted about this before and the wonderful @delta-pavonis wrote a fic about it, but I firmly believe that in the Sandman universe, he was the inspiration for Nick Bottom. Think about it: low-born guy who always has to be the center of attention and acts like a jackass, but somehow won the queen's favor. Hob was salty because Shaxberd had Dream's attention, but Shaxberd was salty because Hob had the queen's attention.

Dream:

First impression: this dude is kind of pathetic, I desire him carnally

Impression now: my babygirl, my everything, my beautiful, ethereal, majestic, all-powerful loserboy. I love him so much 😭

Favorite moment: it's so hard to choose...in the show, I loved his battle with Lucifer and what he did to Rick Madoc (his dispassionate fury in defending Calliope was chilling). In the comics, I love all his interactions with Delirium. Also when Death throws the bread at him and it goes "bip!"

Idea for a story: um...well...don't judge me, but I have a retired!Dream mpreg fic I'm working on, which the amazing @kydrogendragon and some other lovely folks on discord (idk if they're on tumblr or i would tag them) helped me develop.

Unpopular opinion: hmm...I've seen so many opinions about him and I'm not sure which ones are considered unpopular. I think maybe he's a bit more slutty than we give him credit for, based on how he was immediately down to clown when Bast jokingly propositioned him

Favorite relationship: of his canonical relationships, I find Calliope the most interesting. For non-canon, dreamling all day every day forever. For platonic relationships: Lucienne (i just don't see them as romantic, sorry morphienne fans), Death, Delirium, Matthew

Favorite headcanon: based on recent conversations I've seen/taken part in on tumblr, I like the idea of him getting freaky with his helm (the helm stays on during sex). @tryan-a-bex wrote a great little ficlet about it

Death:

First impression: she's amazing and I love her

Impression now: she's amazing and I love her

Favorite moment: when she throws the bread at Dream. Also, not exactly canon, but in the "At Death's Door" manga by Jill Thompson I love when she teams up with Despair and Delirium and catches souls in a baseball mitt:

Idea for a story: admittedly, I don't currently have any ideas for stories with Death as a main character, but she does feature heavily in my post-apocalypse fic. I would like to see more of her days she spends as a mortal. We see some of that in "Death: The High Cost of Living," but I bet she gets up to some crazy shenanigans

Unpopular opinion: I don't think she's as perfect as a lot of people think she is. She's one of my favorite characters and I love her, but I think she's as flawed as the rest of her siblings and has her own struggles that we only get glimpses of

Favorite relationship: canonically she doesn't have any romantic relationships that readers see, but I love her relationships with her siblings, especially Dream. For ships, I kind of like the idea of her with Johanna, but I haven't explored it much

Favorite headcanon: I think she's a lesbian and nothing can dissuade me of that belief

[apoptoses]

hello it’s #VCsmuttysunday and today I’ve got a real special one for you-

In TVA Armand mentioned that Lord Harlech taught him some ‘real gutter tramp English’. But what is 15th century gutter tramp English and how would one use it in a sentence? I’m gonna show you with five great phrases Armand could degrade and humiliate his lovers with.

[disclaimer: slut is used with love here! this is for kink and not actual shaming ♥]

Salted Bitch <- this is telling someone they’re so slutty and horny they’re like a dog in heat

“Daniel, did you have any idea you arch your back like a salted bitch whenever you feel my teeth?”

Wittol <- like a cuck, but worse! A cuck doesn’t know their lover is having an affair, but a wittol sinks so low as to help their lover hook up with others!

“Daniel, do you find that man handsome? Are you so desperate you would have me be your wittol and help you take him home?”

Hairless Quean <- someone who is such a slut they had to shave themselves to get rid of any crabs they picked up on their horny adventures, a totally humiliating type of personal grooming in the 15th century when bush was in and a brazilian marked you as a trollop

“You’ll allow me to shave you, won’t you, Daniel? So that when I find you a partner tonight they’ll know you for the hairless quean you are?”

Prattling Trull <- a slut who never shuts up

“Lestat, you really are such a prattling trull. Whatever will the neighbors think, hearing you go on like that?”

Slovenly Jade <- a double insult, in that a ‘jade’ was a horse for hire should someone need to ride to the next town over. So a slovenly jade implies that the receiver is a messy slut who is happy to be sold to be fucked.

“Lick up your mess, Daniel, I won’t stand for you being some slovenly jade.”

So go forth, indulge your blorbo’s humiliation fetish and have Armand sling some 15th century slang next time they’re in bed 😌

[windsweptinred]

10 Characters/10 Fandoms /10 Tags

Thank you for the tag @two-hands-toward-the-sun, this took me on a deep delve of my fandom past! Time to roll out my gaggle of glorious bastards again...

1. Ken Ichijouji - Digimon 02

Babies first blorbo. Puppy kicking, whip weilding antagonist who giveth not a shiteth. With a soul as black as his gloriously groomed locks. Who, by the power of love is transformed into the soggiest little puddle of twink you ever did see. Tragic backstory ✔️ A smorgasbord of issues ✔️ A realtionship with their rival/best friend so obbsessive, you're going to have a harder time proving this ship isn't a thing than it is. ✔️ Ken Ichijouji came with everything a young, naive millennial needed to make their first glorious steps into the world of fandom.

2. Ryou Bakura/Yami Bakura/Theif King Bakura - (Same body, they count as one!) Yu-Gi-Oh

Ryou Bakura - Adorable British cupcake with the soul of a traumatised lovecraftian cultist. Staring into the abyss while having afternoon tea. Gothic horror in a cream knit.

Yami Bakura - Actual murder floof, the walking personification of a horror podcast. In his wake trails body gore, supernatural mystery and gay subtext. Part demon, part Egyptian theif, 100% bringing sexy back. (bonus points: Florence)

Thief King Bakura - Traumatic back story maketh homicidal rogue. Wears red, has a social circle made up of ghosts and snake monsters... Is this not prime husband material?

3. Starscream - Transformers

Darling little duplicitous second in command of the Decepticons. Not just any 'Little Shit', THE 'Little Shit'. Simulatiously the dumbest and cleverest bot in any room. And that, my friends, takes a particular breed of talent. Negative traits, scheming, petty, fabulous. Postive traits, scheming, petty, fabulous. Repetitive attempts to off Megatron, play of either the power or fore variety. Not sure which, could be both.

4. Darth Maul/ General Armitage Hux- Star Wars

I will not and cannot choose a favourite between them. Instead, watch with wonder and awe as I neatly compress them into the same blurb...

Sad meow meow with self-worth issues does galactic war crimes to prove 'daddy' wrong. What do you mean my fixation with thwarting my archnemeis can't be classed as a hobby/career goal/life ambition? My voice can launch a thousand ships... Different circumstances, same truth. Such a pathetic little sausage, you'll want to sit them down and feed them soup. But they know atleast 101 ways to kill you with the spoon... So best not risk it.

5. Crowley - Supernatural

The diabolical king of cunt serving. Me and my athletic calves are doing this right thing for all wrong reasons...And you can't prove other wise! Alignment: Risk it for a biscuit. Four step program to deal with all life's problems: 1: flirt at it, 2: shout at it, 3: throw (please pick your chosen Winchester or, if pushed, tailor) at it. 4:... Yell bollocks and follow with a whiskey chaser.

6. Desire/Destiny of the Endless - The Sandman

Again, not picking. Desire, my darling little hell kitten. Destiny, my inglorious bastard in brown...

This is my world, you MFs all just live in it!

My emotions... Which I do not have, are the route cause of everyone else's problems.

Ah humanity, the dust bunnies upon which I sneeze.

Even in a glorified bathrobe, I'm still better then you, and you know it.

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that Dream of the Endless is a f*cking dumb ass.

7. Remy Lebeau (Gambit) - Xmen, Marvel Comics

Marvel looked at their collection of motley mutant misfits. And realised they had a morally dubious, disaster bi shaped hole to fill... And there Remy Lebeau has been for for 30 slutty, slutty years and counting. Sex in fushia pink spandex. Single handily keeping thievery in Americas top 50 kinks. Slowly exhausting the world's supply of playing cards... Must be considered a traitor to the cause atleast once a decade to keep his street cred. Must be considered a secret Summers brother atleast once a decade to keep his ego in check.

8. Jonathan Crane (Scarecrow) - Batman (DC)

Scythe wielding, reigning and defending Trick or treat world champion since 1941. The physical attributes of a Giacometti sculpture with the rustic aesthetic of the folk horror genre. Grumpy old man syndrome dialed up to eleven. Pets: Craw the crow, Nightmare the raven... Edward Nygma. Built a life manifesto based on a gothic novel... Oh captain, my captain.

9. Alfie Solomons - Peaky Blinders

All hail the great arisen god of Margate. Who looked upon Tommy Shelby and called him smol. Weilds tomfuckery like a pepper spray straight up the jacksie. Views betrayal as a bonding exercise. Somewhere in his words are the the meaning of life. Still awaiting the lab results as to whether this man is the anthropomorphic personification of chaotic neutral. Not even part of the egg and spoon race. Will still manage to win with a watermelon and a novelty spork.

10. Elias Bouchard - The Magnus Archives

(art by @felix-krain and @caligosatchel)

Cluedo character brought to life by malevolent eldritch entity for sexy end of the world shinnanigans. I suspect either Proffesor Plum or Reverend Green, professional opinions vary. Maintains the inability to move more than one square at a time when enacting nefarious schemes. Still has a preference for homicide by kitchenware. Comes with all the British, arch dilf energy of an Agatha Cristie villain. Taking the horrors from the hands of privileged elite and unleashing them on unsuspecting white collar workers. Eye, chin and tits first.

Whelp, that's my ten fictional characters/fandoms. Men folk (and Desire) addition. When I say I like them on the morally grey dulux colour chart. I'm not exaggerating. 😅

I'm tagging, at your pleasure @mashumaru @aisalynn @bobbole @tickldpnk8 @writing-for-life @marvagon @missingrache @rriavian @jazzy-a and @ibrithir-was-here

[shootingstarrfish]

Omg hiii I looove oversharing about my blorbos 😋

Anyway Simeon is my favorite guy ever and has been since the beginning I'm completely obsessed with him bc he's literally perfect tell my WHY on gods green earth he's always getting swept under the rug. Why does this man never get any attention and when he does why is he mischaracterized. He's got it all. He's tall and handsome in kind of an ethereal effeminate way, he's sweet and kind but not a pushover, he's one of the most tragic characters in the game, he's the perfect muse for a religious trauma arc, a corruption arc, a "the calm collected one who's always having a good time finally snaps and goes apeshit" arc, I mean come on. Come on. Every time I remember that his main sin is wrath despite him being SO chill and gentle on the outside I want to giggle a little bit. My beautiful princess with identity issues and slutty waist I'm so sorry everyone ignores you

Solomon though. I don't remember how I felt about him at first (other than lots of gender envy) but he wasn't a favorite until I came back to the fandom after being absent for ages. Like damn this man is everything. He's so complicated /pos that I cant even articulate why I love him so much but he's so well written (maybe one of the only ones who are written halfway decently) and SO tragic. The way he's so desperately in love with the mc and is forced to watch them go for literally anyone else but would still do anything for them and ask for nothing but a little bit of loyalty in return is scrumptious. Also the way immortality just kinda fucks you up after a while when you're only human. I've been very tempted to put him in a poly ship with my mc and Simeon bc he deserves it but for now he just has to watch from afar as the man he loves endlessly makes out with his best friend that he also kinda sorta has a little crush on bc making the gays suffer brings me copious amounts of joy. He's also the "always totally calm and collected no matter what but actually has really strong feelings that he works to keep in check" type like Simeon and I love that for him. One of the fics I'm reading has him once become so panicked over the MC's wellbeing that he completely loses his composure. Yelling, trembling, the whole nine yards and it was fucking glorious, I love seeing characters like him break.

Also I have to talk a little about Lucifer. He's not generally a favorite but I just think it's funny how I went from hating his guts bc I thought he was an asshole to to liking him a lot bc I have a weak spot for big brother characters. He loves his family so so so much and just has trouble showing it properly!! He's still an asshole and an uptight prick but I like that about him now. My mc had the same development with him as I did, he went from "I hate this motherfucker I wanna kill him also he kinda scares me" to "this is my big brother we are holding hands :)" in the span of like a year and a half and it's really funny. Lucifer thought he was finally getting a sensible housemate and friend but ended up getting another insufferable, headache indicung little brother figure instead. Also I kinda have a non canon ship between him and my MC's father bc the idea is SO funny but also a little cute bc they compliment each other real well. My mc would become homophobic so fast if he found out and thinking about it is incredibly entertaining

thank u for oversharing teehee <333

the side characters are sooo fun and interesting i wish so badly that theyd get to be ever so slightly less on the side :,D

the dynamic between your mc and simeon and solomon PAIN UGH i love it.. <333 my heart hurts for solo but the yearning.... MMM

and absolutely felt about lucifer, i wish i could hate him and leave it at that but he makes it so hard. i have such a complicated relationship with this man but i cant bring myself to genuinely hate him hahaha